Potential sub looking for guidance

[Rrrraven]

Originally Posted by morethanpretty

Also, maybe see a counselor. I'm not trying to be insulting, but from my personal experience I have not met a sub who was emotionally/mentally stable. I might just know the wrong subs, but from that experience, you might benefit from talking to a professional and exploring the reason why you're a sub. I don't mean to suggest that you need to change, but I am just saying that you are young and you might benefit from some professional insight.

I think that suggesting someone might need counseling to explore why they identify as a sub is like telling someone they're not okay for something as basic as sexual orientation. Different is not deviant.

I also think that there tends to be some misinformation outside of the D/s world as to who actually has the *power* in a D/s relationship. Most subs I know are extremely dominant in their professional lives/family lives and choose to submit in their sexual lives. One could argue that the sub has all the power, or even better that a D/s relationship is all about power exchange. Negotiation is optimal in D/s relationships, if you can't negotiate your relationship, your limits, then there is no D/s relationship.

Just my .02