Potential sub looking for guidance

[GunMaster357]

Originally Posted by morethanpretty

Back to the subject of this thread:

Allright, time for some fun and a bit of a coming out.

I am what is considered by some as a Dominant.

Originally Posted by morethanpretty

Why do we always get female subs? Where are the men subs?

Well, there are male subs, but they are quite rare at least from an heterosexual point of view. I think it's because we're wired that way both physically and culturally. Don't get me wrong : I'm for the equality between men and women. It's just the way we are.

Originally Posted by morethanpretty

Kay, do be cautious about who you trust even if there is not supposed to be any sex involved.

That is the main point : TRUST. I cannot stress it enough. Kay, the kind of relationship you're looking for is NOT for casual sex. You have to know your partner literaly inside out. And it goes both way.

In my own case, I'm not currently involved with anyone. That's because when I encounter a woman that may become my partner, I put everything on the table. Otherwise, it's like any other sexual relationship. It may go on for some time

I consider a D/s relationship as something that has to stay behind the bedroom door. In everyday life, my partner would do as every independant woman should do : make her own decisions.

Another important point : SAFETY. If you ever decide to become involved with someone, start to experiment lightly. Especially if the Dominant hasn't much experience. There may be times you'll put your very LIFE in his hands.

So, no bullwhip on the first session.

Originally Posted by morethanpretty

Also, maybe see a counselor. I'm not trying to be insulting, but from my personal experience I have not met a sub who was emotionally/mentally stable. I might just know the wrong subs, but from that experience, you might benefit from talking to a professional and exploring the reason why you're a sub. I don't mean to suggest that you need to change, but I am just saying that you are young and you might benefit from some professional insight. If you're already seeing a counselor, I'll just STFU.

I've met with female subs that were very happy in their life (married and with children). Submission was only a side of their private life. An itch they sometimes wanted to scratch.

I've also met some that were a bit askew because they had a very bad image of themselves, not necessarily coming from their D/s relation.

I've never met with a true sex slave.

[morethanpretty]

Originally Posted by GunMaster357

That is the main point : TRUST. I cannot stress it enough. Kay, the kind of relationship you're looking for is NOT for casual sex. You have to know your partner literaly inside out. And it goes both way.

In my own case, I'm not currently involved with anyone. That's because when I encounter a woman that may become my partner, I put everything on the table. Otherwise, it's like any other sexual relationship. It may go on for some time

I consider a D/s relationship as something that has to stay behind the bedroom door. In everyday life, my partner would do as every independant woman should do : make her own decisions.

Another important point : SAFETY. If you ever decide to become involved with someone, start to experiment lightly. Especially if the Dominant hasn't much experience. There may be times you'll put your very LIFE in his hands.

So, no bullwhip on the first session.



I've met with female subs that were very happy in their life (married and with children). Submission was only a side of their private life. An itch they sometimes wanted to scratch.

I've also met some that were a bit askew because they had a very bad image of themselves, not necessarily coming from their D/s relation.

I've never met with a true sex slave.

I'm not worried about her sex life, just her life life. Why does she want someone else to control every aspect of that? Those are the types of subs that I've known who have had serious emotional issues. A little D/s play in the bedroom isn't a big deal. I'm talking about LIFESTYLE, day to day, the little bitty shit that someone feels they need someone else to control. Thats too far over the line for me to say "yeah, this person is of a healthy mindset." No, when you want someone else to run your life for you, that is not healthy.