Earthquake

[jujuwwhite]

Originally Posted by morethanpretty

Maybe you should look into the reasons for the guidelines before dismissing them as "stupid."
Children being returned to bad biological relatives is unrelated to adults being unable to adopt.

I stand corrected. My wording may not have been the best choice but my sentiment is the same. Yes, the two instances may be different but are related at the same time. When children are taken out of abusive situations and there are no blood relatives who can (or be willing to) take the children into their custody the children are placed in foster homes. Yes, some of the foster homes are not the best places (NOTE I said some not all). However, occassionally children are placed in foster care and are left there for extended periods of time. About the time the children get settled into a family environment and the foster parents decide to make it permanent, somehow the birth parents decide to be parents again and thus starts the vicious cycle all over again.

I do realize that not every situation is the same so please understand I am not trying to group every instance into the same category.

[morethanpretty]

Originally Posted by jujuwwhite

I stand corrected. My wording may not have been the best choice but my sentiment is the same. Yes, the two instances may be different but are related at the same time. When children are taken out of abusive situations and there are no blood relatives who can (or be willing to) take the children into their custody the children are placed in foster homes. Yes, some of the foster homes are not the best places (NOTE I said some not all). However, occassionally children are placed in foster care and are left there for extended periods of time. About the time the children get settled into a family environment and the foster parents decide to make it permanent, somehow the birth parents decide to be parents again and thus starts the vicious cycle all over again.

I do realize that not every situation is the same so please understand I am not trying to group every instance into the same category.

I don't think birth parents should have a "right" to the child (once they've 1st proven untrustworthy.) Each situation should be investigated and decided which is best for the child, stay with stable foster parents, or go back to questionable birth parents? (Can you guess my bias?) Also, I think that if a couple attempting to adopt from a pregnant woman, go through the process, pay for the medical, buy supplies ect ect, and the biological mother changes her mind after an extended period of time, that the couple should be able to recoup some of their losses from that woman who backed out on the agreement. Yes, I think she has the right to change her mind, but not at the detriment of the couple. I think this would cut down on fraud and rash decisions to "keep my baby" once its popped out.