try not to compare your insides to their outsides

[DanaC]

Originally Posted by traceur

.

Here's the thing:
Helping yourself is fantastic... For your well being, which is important, no doubt. But it doesn't make you a great human being for others by "radiating" it on others Helping others takes the effort of actually helping others.
- I helped a neighbor find his missing dog or move or fix something = helping others.
- I made myself feel awesome and sent a neighbor good vibes = not helping others.
I think it's a pretty important difference.

I disagree. That apparent tension between altruism and selfishness is nothing of the sort - they are absolutely, fundamentally and inextricably bound to each other. The selfishness of making oneself feel awesome by helping another, is dependant upon the fact that helping another makes you feel good - we respond at a deep level to altruism.

A much clearer breakpoint would be between helping someone because we want to make them feel awesome - v - helping someone because we want to appear awesome to others.

[it]

Originally Posted by DanaC

I disagree. That apparent tension between altruism and selfishness is nothing of the sort - they are absolutely, fundamentally and inextricably bound to each other. The selfishness of making oneself feel awesome by helping another, is dependant upon the fact that helping another makes you feel good - we respond at a deep level to altruism.

A much clearer breakpoint would be between helping someone because we want to make them feel awesome - v - helping someone because we want to appear awesome to others.

That's a good point, slightly misses the point I was trying to make but also provides a better way to explain what I meant:

I think the quote in the OP as an attempt to create a shortcut into feeling good about yourself as helpful to others by being your glorious inspiring self-helping self rather then actually helping others, essentially cutting out the middle man - other people.