Judging people (long)

Riddil · 01-07-2004, 07:43 AM

Well, just to defend the idea that I really don't believe in anymore...

Sun, that *is* what I meant. I'm not just talking about how attractive someone is. I know a lot of very beautiful women that I rate very low on a personal-rating level. A personal-rating really is defined by "perceived compatibility". Are they a good person? Good conversationalist? Good outlook? Active? Intelligent? Open-minded? etc etc. And yeah, attractiveness is included in there, but it by no means is the sole item.

My whole point with the last post is that while ALL of those things may be important when choosing a mate, that NONE of those things individually matter one little bit when you compare it to a strong relationship.

Sure, you can argue that to actually have a strong relationship you need to find a person with many/most of the traits that you see as important... but my point is that no one will ever be 100% on the list. And any prospective partner will have a some measure of those things. Does it really matter if they are a 75% match compared to an 85%?

Not when you stop and consider that over time the strength of the relationship outweighs that difference.

That's what I meant.

01-07-2004, 07:43 AM	#11
Riddil Management Consultant Join Date: Aug 2002 Posts: 165	Well, just to defend the idea that I really don't believe in anymore... Sun, that is what I meant. I'm not just talking about how attractive someone is. I know a lot of very beautiful women that I rate very low on a personal-rating level. A personal-rating really is defined by "perceived compatibility". Are they a good person? Good conversationalist? Good outlook? Active? Intelligent? Open-minded? etc etc. And yeah, attractiveness is included in there, but it by no means is the sole item. My whole point with the last post is that while ALL of those things may be important when choosing a mate, that NONE of those things individually matter one little bit when you compare it to a strong relationship. Sure, you can argue that to actually have a strong relationship you need to find a person with many/most of the traits that you see as important... but my point is that no one will ever be 100% on the list. And any prospective partner will have a some measure of those things. Does it really matter if they are a 75% match compared to an 85%? Not when you stop and consider that over time the strength of the relationship outweighs that difference. That's what I meant.

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