Abusive boyfriend...

[DanaC]

Sounds terribly cliched I know, but you have to start first by loving yourself. Pinning all your hopes on finding true love is a sure fire way of being hurt in life. It hands way too much power to other people and makes you far too vulnerable to emotional harm.

Have you explored other options besides continuing with your boyfriend? He sounds very bad for you. You deserve better than to be someone else's emotional punching bag, we all do. Better to be alone than with someone who actively makes you unhappy.

Welcome to the Cellar

Also, seriously, don't assess your welcome based on how many messages you get. That's just not how it works.