I'm Tired of Being Stoopid. Fix Me?

[Sundae]

Originally Posted by xoxoxoBruce

I got the impression Elspode was looking for people to explain their own need for fixing... because we all know he doesn't need it. I could be wrong.

Goodness, a far tougher proposition. This could go on for days.

I need to like myself. Many of the screwed up, damaging, self-destructive things I do would be cancelled out by this. If I didn't hate my actions and reactions I could hold my head up higher.

I need to believe in myself. Have confidence, take a chance, even blag a little. I consider myself worthless and it limits me. At the moment I go to bed every night plotting a short story for a competition and it keeps me awake until 04,00 some mornings. I doubt I'll enter.

I need to stop accepting the lowest common denominator when it comes to my opinion of myself - other people's opinion only matters if I let it matter, and should never matter if that person doesn't know me. At present I take the most negative opinion and then add all the bad things they didn't even know about.

I'm not stupid. But when it comes to who I am and how I value myself I am stoopid.

I am my own worst enemy. I envy people with a sense of self worth. Much as I dream of winning the Euro Millions (there was an £85K million jackpot recently) I would trade that in for self confidence.

Or good sex.
Sorry.
I don't mean it, but a change in meds has made me really horny recently. AND I've worked out a way round the almost constant headaches, so it helps not hinders.

Sigh. I'm not stoopid. But I need mending.