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Relationships People who need people; or, why can't we all just get along?

 
 
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Old 06-03-2009, 08:39 AM   #11
Undertoad
Radical Centrist
 
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Cottage of Prussia
Posts: 31,423
Well count me as pop psychologist #423, but her relationship with her father is the basis for her relationship with all men until she has a good bit of life behind her (and maybe not even then)

If she has a loving caring dad, who plays with her and hugs her and is happy for her, she has normal healthy relationships. If there was a lot of chaos in her house, then she will be inclined to create chaos where there is none. If dad beats her, she may become sullen and withdrawn. If dad beats mom, she may become angry with all men. If dad sexually abuses her, she may become a stripper. If dad emotionally abuses her, she may become bulimic, or a "cutter". And so on.

If dad is loving at Christmas, but shitty the rest of the time, maybe she becomes that testing person, wondering whether there is love and endlessly testing for it.

She doesn't even know she's doing it, because it's "normal" for her.
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