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Old 03-27-2009, 06:44 AM   #10
DanaC
We have to go back, Kate!
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Yorkshire
Posts: 25,964
Another quick thought.

Being bullied isn't just emotionally distressing it also impacts on your self-confidence and self-image. It makes you feel weak, like a failure. You dont want to tell anyone because that just exposes how weak and unable to cope you are. The victim begins to believe they deserve it in some way: either they're so thick, ugly, unlovable, weak 'bullyable'. Telling someone about it is like confessing to something you've done.

Attitudes like the ones expressed in this thread, by adults shows me that people still don't really understand how distressing and destructive it is, there is still a negative attitude towards the victims of bullying: theybring it on themselves by being weak. I realise that's not specifically whats been said, but its clearly the implication. Some people just want to be victims? And if you only teach your children to be strong and independenet and deal with bullies in the way we all apparently shold know how to deal with them...it places the fault, the blame, the reason for bullying onto the bullied child not the ones making them miserable.
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