Who's pissing on your chips today?

[footfootfoot]

First, it's "to whom" and not "whom to."
Second, "jest" is a joke or witticism, "gist" refers to the substance of a conversation and can be used when one is making a synopsis of a conversation.
Third, "my kids swam..."or "my kids have swum..."
Fourth,"Where" refers to location, and while the pool is the location, you are referring to the past tense, "were". Not to mention that we usually use the letter 's' when we make a plural. As in "...these meets the line ups were..."
Fifth, I'm gonna stop now and not take you to task for your shitty punctuation (mainly 'cause my own pretty much sucks) or your indefensible use of "the fact that" (according to Strunk and White) and your repeated failure to recognize verb tense or plural nouns.
Finally, You are in serious need of either penis, pussy, or more tennis. See that you get taken care of before you log on to your computer again.

BTW, If you are spending QT with your family on the weekend, why do you even have your cell phone with you?


Or you could just respond with:
"Mm'kay, thanks for sharing."