Is it a problem that...

[Griff]

... my Prof paraphrased UT's John Wayne line last night? It'll be a fun class anyway!

[Shawnee123]

Originally Posted by Griff

... my Prof paraphrased UT's John Wayne line last night? It'll be a fun class anyway!

Not a problem...sounds like a great prof. Now, to "profess" my ignorance...what John Wayne line?

[Griff]

We live bigger lives here, because we are ornery John Wayne motherfuckers who left the countries we came from because they were too controlling and unadventurous.

[Clodfobble]

Maybe he's a lurker.

[Griff]

Good thing I never spout off here.

[SteveDallas]

Originally Posted by Clodfobble

Maybe he's a lurker.

Maybe I'm, err I mean, he's a regular poster.

[skysidhe]

now way! :p

Is he here?

[Shawnee123]

Well, good thing he's the most wonderful, knowledgable, astute, and learned Prof you've ever had, and that he's your favoritest EVER, eh Griff?

[Undertoad]

I didn't exactly recall my inspiration for the remark, but I have now. See, I never have an original thought in my life. P. J. O'Rourke is the master. In his "Holidays In Hell" (1986), he has traveled to all the world's worst places and reported on them. But when he finds himself in regular old England, and faced with the usual criticism, he finally snaps, and reels off a rude rant:

Back in London, I was having dinner in the Groucho Club -- this week's in-spot for what's left of Britain's lit gritz and nouveau rock riche -- when one person started in on the Stars And Stripes. Eventually he got, as the Europeans always do, to the part about "your country's never been invaded." (This fellow had been two during the Blitz, you see.) "You don't know the horror, the suffering. You think war is..."

I snapped.

"A John Wayne movie," I said. That's what you were going to say, wasn't it? We think war is a John Wayne movie. We think life is a John Wayne movie -- with good guys and bad guys, as simple as that. Well, you know something, Mister Limey Poofter? You're right. And let me tell you who those bad guys are. They're us. WE BE BAD.

We're the baddest-ass sons of bitches that ever jogged in Reeboks. We're three-quarters grizzly bear and two-thirds car wreck and descended from a stock market crash on our mother's side. You take your Germany, France and Spain, roll them all together and it wouldn't give us room to park our cars. We're the big boys, Jack, the original, giant, economy-sized, new and improved butt kickers of all time. When we snort coke in Houston, people lose their hats in Cap D'Antibes. And we've got an American Express card credit limit higher than your piss-ant metric numbers go.

"You say our country's never been invaded? You're right, little buddy. Because I'd like to see the needle-dicked foreigners who'd have the guts to try. We drink napalm to get our hearts started in the morning. A rape and a mugging is our way of saying 'Cheerio.' Hell can't hold our sock-hops. We walk taller, talk louder, spit further, fuck longer and buy more things than you know the names of. I'd rather be a junkie in a New York City jail than king, queen, and jack of all you Europeans. We eat little countries like this for breakfast and shit them out before lunch."

Of course, the guy should have punched me. But this was Europe. He just smiled his shabby, superior European smile.

[Griff]

Originally Posted by Shawnee123

Well, good thing he's the most wonderful, knowledgable, astute, and learned Prof you've ever had, and that he's your favoritest EVER, eh Griff?

You know, I was about to bring that up!

Originally Posted by Undertoad

See, I never have an original thought in my life.

Sure, that's it.

[skysidhe]

cool

[Trilby]

"he just smiled his shabby, superior European smile" -- I've seen this smile in America. It's usually employed by some familiar who would rather gag on someone else's vomit rather than admit to state sponsored laziness.