Counseling

KinkyVixen · 09-06-2006, 03:06 PM

Anyone ever been to counseling before? Like, that can maybe tell me what to expect?

glatt · 09-06-2006, 03:30 PM

What kind of counseling?

You don't have to share more than you want to with us if it's too personal.

I've been to premarital counseling, which was pretty tame. Just talking about what you think and feel, and what your expectations are. Getting all that stuff out in the open up front. I felt like it was a very safe place and very worthwhile. Been to other kinds of counseling to, but none of it over anything too serious. Academic and career counseling. That kind of stuff.

I think mostly in counseling you just sit around and talk about the important issues you are facing. The more honest and open you are, the more helpful it is likely to be. I think most counseling sessions try to make you feel safe, so you are willing to open up.

Trilby · 09-06-2006, 03:34 PM

I've done addiction counseling, group counseling (very, very eye-opening for me--probably the most important counseling work I've done) and depression 'talk' therapy. I'll be glad to help if I can.

Pangloss62 · 09-06-2006, 03:48 PM

Yep.

In retrospect, I think it's a racket. But I suppose it could work for some people.

KinkyVixen · 09-06-2006, 03:49 PM

I don't really know the specific type of counselling...I guess just issues counselling 'cause I have some "issues" I need to work out. I'm thinking that i'm gonna have to deal with the addiction part of it though, 'cause I'm sure it's gonna come up at some point. I just didn't know...like, for example...it takes me a little while to open up, especially about certain things to a complete stranger. I think that they might get frustrated with me because of that...I feel that way because I think that usually when people go to counselling they are usually going for a specific reason...while I kind of know why i'm going and what I want out of it... I don't really know specifically what I want her to know...
I know i'm weird, and maybe I don't make a lot of sense...I just know i need to go talk to someone, so that's what i'm doing.

Trilby · 09-06-2006, 04:16 PM

Good luck, vixen. I hope it works out.

Spexxvet · 09-06-2006, 04:21 PM

Go. Talk. Feel better.

Flint · 09-06-2006, 04:29 PM

You'll get exactly as much out of it as you're willing to put into it.

KinkyVixen · 09-06-2006, 04:40 PM

You're right Flint...that's what I was hoping and expecting.

and thanks Spex and Bri

lol

Stormieweather · 09-06-2006, 05:44 PM

Counseling is good for helping you figure out the 'reason'. The reason for addiction issues, marital issues, self-esteem issues, depression etc. As you talk, the counselor will usually ask questions to help you gain insight into why you said what you just said. If you don't tell the truth or the whole story, the counselor will be hindered in their questions or observations. They are required to keep whatever you say confidential (except for certain life-threatening situations), so don't be afraid to open up. It's your dollar, get everything you can out of it.

Good luck!

Stormie

KinkyVixen · 09-06-2006, 05:57 PM

So, if I already know the "reason" I just don't have the tools, or can't find the tools necessary to help myself...i'm basically just wasting money?

Trilby · 09-06-2006, 06:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KinkyVixen

So, if I already know the "reason" I just don't have the tools, or can't find the tools necessary to help myself...i'm basically just wasting money?

Knowing the "reason" is highly overrated. The problem is the behavior--does it really matter that you do it 'coz of this or that thing in your past? (at least, that's what all my addictions counselors have said) the TOOLS are the thing! But, then, and here's the rub, you've got to USE the tools once you have them. Anyway, counselors can help you get and begin working the tools. I don't think it's a waste of time but it's not a panacea, either.

Aliantha · 09-06-2006, 08:04 PM

I had one session of counselling once and it helped me a lot. I've never gone again, but it was for a specific purpose soooo...maybe doesn't count.

glatt · 09-06-2006, 08:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stormieweather

As you talk, the counselor will usually ask questions to help you gain insight into why you said what you just said. If you don't tell the truth or the whole story, the counselor will be hindered in their questions or observations. They are required to keep whatever you say confidential (except for certain life-threatening situations), so don't be afraid to open up. It's your dollar, get everything you can out of it.

This is exactly what I think too.

You will be paying this person to help you. Give them as much information as possible so they can do the best job they can. Be as open as you can. Don't hold back.

09-06-2006, 10:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Flint

You'll get exactly as much out of it as you're willing to put into it.

09-06-2006, 03:06 PM	#1
KinkyVixen Marching In! Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Wichita, KS Posts: 580	Counseling Anyone ever been to counseling before? Like, that can maybe tell me what to expect? __________________ "Smile before bed.You'll sleep better."

09-06-2006, 03:34 PM	#3
Trilby Slattern of the Swail Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 15,654	I've done addiction counseling, group counseling (very, very eye-opening for me--probably the most important counseling work I've done) and depression 'talk' therapy. I'll be glad to help if I can. __________________ In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum

09-06-2006, 03:48 PM	#4
Pangloss62 Lecturer Join Date: May 2006 Location: Atlanta Posts: 768	Yep. In retrospect, I think it's a racket. But I suppose it could work for some people. __________________ Things are never as good, or bad, as they seem.

09-06-2006, 03:49 PM	#5
KinkyVixen Marching In! Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Wichita, KS Posts: 580	I don't really know the specific type of counselling...I guess just issues counselling 'cause I have some "issues" I need to work out. I'm thinking that i'm gonna have to deal with the addiction part of it though, 'cause I'm sure it's gonna come up at some point. I just didn't know...like, for example...it takes me a little while to open up, especially about certain things to a complete stranger. I think that they might get frustrated with me because of that...I feel that way because I think that usually when people go to counselling they are usually going for a specific reason...while I kind of know why i'm going and what I want out of it... I don't really know specifically what I want her to know... I know i'm weird, and maybe I don't make a lot of sense...I just know i need to go talk to someone, so that's what i'm doing. __________________ "Smile before bed.You'll sleep better."

09-06-2006, 04:16 PM	#6
Trilby Slattern of the Swail Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 15,654	Good luck, vixen. I hope it works out. __________________ In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum

09-06-2006, 03:30 PM	#2
glatt ™ Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Arlington, VA Posts: 27,717	What kind of counseling? You don't have to share more than you want to with us if it's too personal. I've been to premarital counseling, which was pretty tame. Just talking about what you think and feel, and what your expectations are. Getting all that stuff out in the open up front. I felt like it was a very safe place and very worthwhile. Been to other kinds of counseling to, but none of it over anything too serious. Academic and career counseling. That kind of stuff. I think mostly in counseling you just sit around and talk about the important issues you are facing. The more honest and open you are, the more helpful it is likely to be. I think most counseling sessions try to make you feel safe, so you are willing to open up.

09-06-2006, 04:21 PM	#7
Spexxvet Makes some feel uncomfortable Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 10,346	Go. Talk. Feel better. __________________ "I'm certainly free, nay compelled, to spread the gospel of Spex. " - xoxoxoBruce

09-06-2006, 04:29 PM	#8
Flint Snowflake Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Dystopia Posts: 13,136	You'll get exactly as much out of it as you're willing to put into it. __________________ **************** There's a level of facility that everyone needs to accomplish, and from there it's a matter of deciding for yourself how important ultra-facility is to your expression. ... I found, like Joseph Campbell said, if you just follow whatever gives you a little joy or excitement or awe, then you're on the right track. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Terry Bozzio**

09-06-2006, 04:40 PM	#9
KinkyVixen Marching In! Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Wichita, KS Posts: 580	You're right Flint...that's what I was hoping and expecting. and thanks Spex and Bri lol __________________ "Smile before bed.You'll sleep better."

09-06-2006, 05:44 PM	#10
Stormieweather Wearing her bitch boots Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Floriduh Posts: 1,181	Counseling is good for helping you figure out the 'reason'. The reason for addiction issues, marital issues, self-esteem issues, depression etc. As you talk, the counselor will usually ask questions to help you gain insight into why you said what you just said. If you don't tell the truth or the whole story, the counselor will be hindered in their questions or observations. They are required to keep whatever you say confidential (except for certain life-threatening situations), so don't be afraid to open up. It's your dollar, get everything you can out of it. Good luck! Stormie __________________ "First they ignore you, then they ridicule you, then they fight you, then you win." - Mahatma Gandhi

09-06-2006, 05:57 PM	#11
KinkyVixen Marching In! Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Wichita, KS Posts: 580	So, if I already know the "reason" I just don't have the tools, or can't find the tools necessary to help myself...i'm basically just wasting money? __________________ "Smile before bed.You'll sleep better."

09-06-2006, 08:04 PM	#13
Aliantha trying hard to be a better person Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 16,493	I had one session of counselling once and it helped me a lot. I've never gone again, but it was for a specific purpose soooo...maybe doesn't count. __________________ Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber

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