After the Fifth Time, We'll Warn You Quite Sternly!

[wolf]

Apparently you can say fuck in class, but you still can't print it in the newspaper.

You can use the f-word in class (but only five times)

A secondary school is to allow pupils to swear at teachers - as long as they don't do so more than five times in a lesson. A running tally of how many times the f-word has been used will be kept on the board. If a class goes over the limit, they will be 'spoken' to at the end of the lesson.

The astonishing policy, which the school says will improve the behaviour of pupils, was condemned by parents' groups and MPs yesterday. They warned it would backfire.

Parents were advised of the plan, which comes into effect when term starts next week, in a letter from the Weavers School in Wellingborough, Northamptonshire.

Assistant headmaster Richard White said the policy was aimed at 15 and 16-year-olds in two classes which are considered troublesome.

'Tolerate but not condone'

"Within each lesson the teacher will initially tolerate (although not condone) the use of the f-word (or derivatives) five times and these will be tallied on the board so all students can see the running score," he wrote in the letter

"Over this number the class will be spoken to by the teacher at the end of the lesson."

Parents called the rule 'wholly irresponsible and ludicrous'.

"This appears to be a misguided attempt to speak to kids on their own level," said the father of one pupil.

Should have do's and don'ts

Nick Seaton, chairman of the Campaign for Real Education, said: "In these sort of situations teachers should be setting clear principles of 'do and don't'.

"They should not be compromising in an apparent attempt to please the pupils. This will send out completely the wrong message.

"Youngsters will play up to this and ensure they use their five goes, demeaning the authority of the teacher."

Tory MP Ann Widdecombe said the policy was based on 'Alice in Wonderland reasoning'.

"What next?" she asked. "Do we allow people to speed five times or burgle five times? You don't improve something by allowing it, you improve something by discouraging it."

'Praise postcards'

The 1,130-pupil school, which was criticised as 'not effective' by Ofsted inspectors last November, also plans to send 'praise postcards' to the parents of children who do not swear and who turn up on time for lessons.

Headmaster Alan Large said he had received no complaints about the policy. "The reality is that the fword is part of these young adults' everyday language," he said.

"As a temporary policy we are giving them a bit of leeway, but want them to think about the way they talk and how they might do better."

[Kagen4o4]

fuck that

[smoothmoniker]

that's one.

What gets me is the harsh nature of the punishment. Ooooh, teacher's gonna talk to them at the end of the class! Bet they're all just shaking in their boots over THAT one! I had a teacher who threw blackboard erasers at us when I was in high school. He was quick and had a deadly aim. Worked like a charm, too. Even the worst of the JD crowd didn't care for the humiliation of an eraser landing on their snout, and it hurt, too! I suppose today the guy would be sued for child abuse or something. Fuckers!

[NICOTINEGUN]

Thank the Clinton Administration and it's Touchy, Feely philosophy.

[lumberjim]

Originally Posted by NICOTINEGUN

Thank the Clinton Administration and it's Touchy, Feely philosophy.

for the policies in england? are you paying fucking attention?

[Cyclefrance]

[quote]"Within each lesson the teacher will initially tolerate (although not condone) the use of the f-word (or derivatives) five times and these will be tallied on the board so all students can see the running score," [/UNQUOTE]

Let's see, now...

Average class size: 30

Offence allowances per pupil: 5

Average time to identify pupil, write name on board and record expletive+frequency: oh, I don't know, 15 seconds?

Assuming high take-up of offer is 80% of class (why not?)

Time spent recording offences: 30 x 5 x 15 x 80% divided by 60 for minutes = 60 minutes

Average length of lesson: 30 minutes

Oops!

(I know, it's only five times per lesson, but that'll still eat up a lot of time - just amplifying the stupidity of it all. That's UK education for you!)

[chronos]

I have to say that it's refreshing to see another country with ideas about raising kids as stupid as the US.

I don't know why discipline is such a big deal now days, even when it involves light physical punishment. Parents have been using spankings for hundreds of years and people have grown up just fine. I certainly got my share of smacks growing up and I turned out fine, don't hate my parents, and haven't tried to kill anyone because it taught me a cycle of violence.

I'm not talking child abuse, just spankings. Start out with a pat on the ass when they're young and step it up as they age. I pretty much draw the line at the belt. Hand smacks are fine but nothing that can cause injury or lasting pain. You're really just trying to get their attention and provide some negative reinforcement, not harm them.

[mrnoodle]

The parents who are sooo afraid of the horrible physical and psychological scars caused by spanking often have kids who demand to have their genitals pierced at about age 13.

Gimme a break. They will live, and getting in trouble for doing something wrong is the natural order of the universe. The U.S. Senate notwithstanding.

People should worry about our world 20 years from now. It's going to be run by people who never had a consequence in their lives.

[BigV]

Originally Posted by smoothmoniker

that's one.

HAHAHAHAHHAA! funniest post all week! *wipes a tear away* hehahaha. yeah. um heh. Good one.

[wolf]

Originally Posted by lumberjim

for the policies in england? are you paying fucking attention?

It's his fault there, too.

[Cyclefrance]

If you stop for a moment you can see that this is just another example of how this government and supporters of its methods of governing fail to consider the pitfalls that hasty policies produce.

I doubt for one moment that the head-teacher concerned has given any thought to the real problems behind his new policy. I mean, are all expletives to be given the same value - are we really to believe that a wank is as important as a fuck? Surely there should be some hierarchy of expletives and a points system at least. And you really cannot have a bugger being treated the same way as a shithead, can you? - for goodness sake, they're poles apart.

There's no thought been given either to the compound expletive - e.g 'oh, fuck-shit-bugger-wank-arseholes' - is this to count as one or five expletives. Sorry, but it is absolutely clear to me that the whole exercise is doomed to failure from the start.

[Trilby]

fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck! I'm so totally NOT in trouble, either. Wow. That's freedom for you! Feels great!

[Happy Monkey]

Originally Posted by Cyclefrance

I doubt for one moment that the head-teacher concerned has given any thought to the real problems behind his new policy. I mean, are all expletives to be given the same value - are we really to believe that a wank is as important as a fuck?
...
There's no thought been given either to the compound expletive - e.g 'oh, fuck-shit-bugger-wank-arseholes' - is this to count as one or five expletives.

I have an easy solution. Assign a value of zero to all of them, and the math works out perfectly.

[wolf]

My office would be doing a lot of detention.

Consider, though ... how funny would it be to make someone write "I will not say fuck in class." 100 times?