please recommend a self help book, therapy, drug...

[mrnoodle]

This is normally the point where I come in and push my religion on people.

However, I've been depressed myself for about the last, oh, 4 years or so. I feel "old, stupid, ugly, untalented, God hates me, I hate everyone, I don't want to go outside of the house, where's the vicodin" about once every couple of weeks, and it lasts for a day or two. It's not that my life is bad, I have been pretty successful career-wise, of late. Not looking for a relationship, but I have a few friends and things to do in my off time. Kind of a normal life. I have rheumatoid arthritis, which has left me unable to bowhunt (for the moment) or do hard physical stuff. I don't take as much "medication" as I used to, and nothing illegal anymore, so my blood should be pretty clear. But the symptoms come and go without any warning, and I've sort of gotten used to it. I hide my "cyclical depression" well, too - I've got a kind of class-clown reputation among people who know me. Rode the Wellbutrin train for a year or so, didn't see any major difference. I think I'm just "arty".

Or maybe I just *think* I'm depressed ....gonna go take that test...