Finest commencement speech ever

[Kitsune]

Its the student speeches that always get me. Last Friday I attended a High School graduation in which the valedictorian gave a speech that made me think he had a savior complex.

"Here I stand before you, with nothing to hide..." he said, taking off his robe to reveal his dress shirt underneath. He paused for drama, acting as if he couldn't find the words and seemed to find inspiration by looking into the stage lights with tears in his eyes. "...with no secrets to keep from you. I must tell you now that you, the students, and your families are the most important thing to me second only to one thing: my relationship with Jesus Christ."

The crowd went completely insane with applause for what seemed like five minutes. Students threw their hats into the air. Horns sounded. The crowd stood. The cheering didn't seem to end and only grew with intensity as the prinicpal stood and clapped.

In my high school, that would have gotten your ass kicked and complaints from parents.

Ah, small town high school graduations are so amusing.