Ummm...yeah, we're really sorry about that.

[elSicomoro]

When Rho and I got home tonight, the first thing I did was check the mailbox. I noticed a long cylindrical object in there...Mom sent me a calendar. Good, b/c we need one. I look at the handwriting on it, and sure enough, it's from Mom.

When I pulled it out of the mailbox, I noticed that it looked incredibly dirty, and was wrapped in plastic. What the fuck?! And it looked like the plastic was put on there by the Post Office. Hmmm...

Then, as I inspected it closer, I saw a piece of paper inside with the calendar. I thought it was a note from Mom, but it was actually this:



If you live out this way, and you were expecting mail from St. Louis in early December and never got it, now you know why.

I hope no one lost any Xmas presents in that mess. But damn...that's kinda funny. It reminds me of the time I had to tell a customer that her order was destroyed in a UPS truck fire at JFK Airport in NYC.

But let's review this little note in detail, shall we?

--What kind of mechanical problem caused the fire? Hmmm...perhaps a leaking fuel line or a carburetor. That, or those two guys smoking weed in the trailer got some hot ashes on the mail.

--I'm glad no one got hurt, but [stereotypical american] who really gives a shit about that? It's all about my mail...it's all about me. Mememememe!!! [/stereotypical american]

--All the mail got fucked up? Damn, that must've been a hell of a fire.

--Heroic effort? What the...?

--Maybe I could cry emotional distress over not getting the calendar sooner, and sue the USPS. Then again, I've been waiting on a $6.60 refund from one of their vending machines for almost 4 years.

The calendar is a loss. Mom found the story amusing. I should have a new calendar by the end of next week.

The end.