[jujuwwhite]

A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy
International Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in
possession of a ruler, a protractor, a compass, a slide-rule and a
calculator. At a morning press conference, the Attorney General said
he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement.
He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with
carrying weapons of math instruction.

'Al-Gebra is a problem for us', the Attorney General said.
'They derive solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on
tangents in search of absolute values.' They use secret code names
like 'X' and 'Y' and refer to themselves as 'unknowns', but we have
determined that they belong to a common denominator of the axis of
medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer
Isosceles used to say, 'There are 3 sides to every triangle'.

When asked to comment on the arrest, President Obama said, 'If
God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, he would
have given us more fingers and toes.' White House aides told
reporters they could not recall a more intelligent or profound
statement by the President. It is believed that the Nobel Prize for
Physics will follow.