Getting a locksmith on the flat earth
 

I was locked out of my house on Tuesday.

I used google maps to find the locksmith closest to me, in Eagleville.

(Eagleville is three miles away.)

Called the number listed, and went through a series of ring-throughs until automation came on: select 1 if you are a new customer, 2 if you are a previous customer.

Ring-throughs again, to another automation: select 1 if you need immediate service, select 2 if you are a business with a contract.

Rings to a live human, who can barely speak English. He takes my name, address and telephone number. He cannot hear well enough for me to spell my last name. After he takes all my information, his "computer crashes" and he has to take it all again.

He then puts me on hold, and the hold music is a radio station. It plays some ads for places I'm not familiar with, and then announces that it's 101.5, Tampa Bay.

(Tampa Bay is 800 miles away.)

The guy comes back on to tell me that he has found a locksmith for me and located my address, and the locksmith will be at my house in 20 minutes, and will call 10 minutes out to verify. OK.

Wait 25 minutes, and the locksmith calls. The caller-id reports his area code as 702. Nevada.

(Nevada is 2000 miles away.)

In a thick Arabic accent, he asks for my cross-streets. He figures out where I am, apologizes for being late and says he'll be there in ten minutes. And sure enough he does show in ten more minutes, and proceeds to open the door in 5 seconds. As much as I've heard it takes a good locksmith only seconds to pick the house locks, it's always amazing to see. In his thick Arabic accent he again apologizes for being late, and explains that he had to drive up from Philly.

(Philly is 15 miles and one extremely crowded highway away).

The total price for the service is $149.

Sounds like globalization on a local level.

locked out?...what happened....was there a staple lodged in the screen door lock or something?

oooh that's so cool and inside because the n00bs won't know what you're talking about

Getting locked out is what happens to you when you only use remote garage door openers for 15 years, forget about your usual front door key, and then one day your power is out for an indefinite period of time.

why don't you go cuddle with spexxvet or robsterboy?

Because he'd have to take his dick out of your ass.

Not that there's anything wrong with that.

yeah...i started it in this thread....sorry T. I am very weak.

I want to know how UT used google maps if he was locked out.
I have no doubt he is possessed of technological superpowers, but assuming his computers are inside...

But the story of technology being at once brilliant and stupid ... yeah that sounds plausible.

Not all the computers were inside.

plus, it says ip phones to me.

I was at work when I looked for a locksmith, but you know, I also have Google Maps on my Smartphone.

:thumbsup:

So now you've hidden a key, right?

Lumberjim, have you spent time in Turkey? That is the exact phrase they use to apologize for something.

Sheesh, you boys, I can never keep up with who's banging who.

Ohhhh, no, I remember now....LJ is in love with Syc this week and Flint is on the outer.

Carry on....

Oh....I've never been locked out of a house and had to have a locksmith come out.

I dont lock my house and if I do snib the front door, I just climb in the bedroom window.

oooh, locked out. were you naked?

So, you had a fancy ol' smart phone, but didn't have your front door key on your keyring? Seems to me the low-tech ruled here.

Okay, why'd you use Google Maps. You can't search on your phone for "yellow pages" info?

Google Maps uses the Yellow pages info - along with other sources! - but puts it on your map, so you can see where the businesses are. I thought it would be a really slick move to find the closest one.

ah well. system not perfect yet, or ever. Good try, though!


so . . . were you naked? :D

If UT had picked up the actual phone book and used those paper yellow pages to call the locksmith, he would have had the same result. The problem was in the locksmith's business practices, not UT's smart phone, or Google Maps, or the linked yellow pages. The problem is that the local locksmith uses some call routing system that goes through Timbuktu to find a locksmith from far away. It was probably the day off for the local locksmith or he sold his business or something and his phone was forwarded to some large locksmith conglomerate like the FTD florist one.

Good point. At least there was some coverage, irritating as it seemed to be.

no

you have, though? do they really belch their compliments to the chef?

You say that as if it's something new....:right:

Was there actually a problem? It saounds like everything worked out pretty smoothly.

Depends on your point of view I guess, and what you were expecting.

BEWARE OF PHONY LOCKSMITHS
 

If You Go On Google And Type In The Words Phony Locksmth .You Will See all These phony locksmiths Scamming People In All The USA.They Are A problem To All.Here Is One Of Many Of There News Report Links. http://www.todaystmj4.com/features/iteam/5288916.html

PHONY LOCKSMITHS HURTING ALL U.S.A.
 

Here Is A Brand new Report on The Phony Locksmiths Today October 19,2007 They Work Out Off call Centers In New York City.Here is The Link to View There New Report on Them from CBS News In DALLAS TEXAS.Click On Link To View. http://cbs11tv.com/video/?id=22142

Wow.

how much would it have cost you to just break a window?

Did the guy do anything to verify that it was actually your house you were asking him to break into?

HERE ARE A GROUP OF NEWS REPORTS ON A PDF.FILE
 

Here Are A Group Of PDF.FILES News Reports.This Should Help You To See How These Phony Locksmiths Work.Click On The Link To View.Here Is The Link.http://www.aloa.org/pdf/pressroom.pdf

PHONY LOCKSMITHS COMPLANT CENTER
 

Here Is A Place you Can Make A Complant.If You Are A Victim Of The Phony Locksmiths.Here Is The Link. http://www.aloa.org/pressroom.html

so, get to know a genuine local locksmith before you have a problem?

Are they doing anything besides charging too much?

Yeah, I spent the bulk of 1982 in Sinop, a little bump on the Black Sea coast, doing never you mind what.

Do you know, I've never met a culture that took public burps for compliments to the chef. I reckon it's a tale for old wives.

It's a land of zingy yoghurt and zippy pastirma, I declare. Rugs too. And they eat a lot of lamb.