The Cellar  

Go Back   The Cellar > Main > Health

Health Keeping your body well enough to support your head

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 05-15-2020, 04:45 PM   #1
anonymous
Operations Operative
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: in hiding
Posts: 578
Just reaching out because life is very rough right now

I just need to tell someone. I really need to walk to a friend's house and let loose but I can't because coronavirus and I can't because I don't have many friends of that sort because I'm just not that type of person. My one friend who I really could talk to is completely uncontactable right now, my other main option is stereotypical baby-boomer re cv (won't practice social distancing or preventative hygiene) but also sympathizes by telling me how things could be worse and how bad their life is. As a "head up, plow on" kind of a person, if/when I do finally admit things are getting to me, this is unhelpful at best. They mean well but.... And the third person has their own battle and is travelling out of town to deal with it. I don't want to burden my other friends via messaging platforms any more. They have enough stresses of their own already and when a friend reaches out in that way mostly it just makes you feel helpless and I certainly don't want to do that to anyone -I want to still be friends when all this is over, not awkward acquaintances.

OK, I think I'm done. It's rough, is all. thanks very much, you've been a lovely audience, I'll see you all same place next crisis.
anonymous is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-15-2020, 04:57 PM   #2
Griff
still says videotape
 
Join Date: Feb 2001
Posts: 26,813
I see your crisis and understand it's a damn poor time for it. I'm sorry.
__________________
If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you.
- Louis D. Brandeis
Griff is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-15-2020, 09:58 PM   #3
xoxoxoBruce
The future is unwritten
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 71,105
I have a feeling there are a lot of people hurting more than they're willing to admit right now. one because they don't want to dump any more negative vibes on friends, and two because they don't want to be seen as a whiner like a kid with a skinned knee when a Tornado is ripping the roof off.

There are a fortunate few who have the Cellar to vent frustrations and pain to understanding friends.
__________________
The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.
xoxoxoBruce is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-15-2020, 10:46 PM   #4
Clodfobble
UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Austin, TX
Posts: 20,012
Sorry, anon. I hope things ease up soon.
Clodfobble is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2020, 03:51 AM   #5
limey
Encroaching on your decrees
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: An island within the south-west coast of Scotland
Posts: 7,016
Sorry to read this anon. You know your Cellar pals are here for you and you’ve done the right thing in letting us know how you feel. Life is shit at time, eh? Hang in there.


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
__________________
Living it up on the edge ... of civilisation, within the southwest coast of
limey is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2020, 06:00 AM   #6
lumberjim
I can hear my ears
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 25,571
Could be worse. You could have made a typo in the thread topic and been unable to edit it.

Seriously though, hug. Hhhuuuuugggg.
__________________
This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality
Embrace this moment, remember
We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan
lumberjim is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2020, 06:05 AM   #7
limey
Encroaching on your decrees
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: An island within the south-west coast of Scotland
Posts: 7,016
Quote:
Originally Posted by lumberjim View Post
Could be worse. You could have made a typo in the thread topic and been unable to edit it.

Seriously though, hug. Hhhuuuuugggg.

But a moderator can fix that. If only we could also provide more significant help.


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
__________________
Living it up on the edge ... of civilisation, within the southwest coast of
limey is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2020, 06:20 AM   #8
lumberjim
I can hear my ears
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 25,571
Well now it's not nearly as funny....
__________________
This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality
Embrace this moment, remember
We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan
lumberjim is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2020, 10:36 AM   #9
glatt
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Arlington, VA
Posts: 27,717
Anon, I'm sorry life's kind of a shit sandwich right now.
glatt is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2020, 12:35 PM   #10
anonymous
Operations Operative
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: in hiding
Posts: 578
Quote:
Originally Posted by lumberjim View Post
Could be worse. You could have made a typo in the thread topic and been unable to edit it.
Did you know you can get so down that you just can't laugh any more and comments like this are just another slap, even though you know they shouldn't be

Quote:
Originally Posted by limey View Post
But a moderator can fix that. If only we could also provide more significant help.
thanks.

being here and being kind is significant.
anonymous is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2020, 01:22 PM   #11
lumberjim
I can hear my ears
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 25,571
Quote:
Originally Posted by anonymous View Post
Did you know you can get so down that you just can't laugh any more and comments like this are just another slap, even though you know they shouldn't be







thanks.



being here and being kind is significant.
You know I do. Here's the thing. Maybe... You want to be sad right now. And if you do, then you might take what was clearly a friendly shot in the arm and reverse it to make me feel bad too. The emotion (pain body) that is in control will try to generate more of itself so it can survive.

You're not your depression. You see it. You've identified it. You hear the thoughts. You're not the thoughts. You're just a splinter of life like me and all these other people that care about you. The same.

Focus your attention on what's within 5 minutes and 5 meters for most of your day. Take time daily or weekly to make your plan, and then set it aside until the next step. Meanwhile give the present step your full attention. Respect it even if it's mundane.

Repetitive thought paths will erode a track to sadville. The more you think them, the more you think them. Take control of what you think about.


I'm sorry if I am not helping. This is how I deal. I am not my grief. I am not my regret. I don't identify with the emotion. I feel it., look at it, and it fades. Comes back strong at times, but it's not to be dwelt upon. If you go down that hole, it starts to become attractive.

I am sorry to preach. And I'm probably being insensitive, but I want to try to help you keep your chin up. Regardless, these kind of days don't last. You will.
__________________
This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality
Embrace this moment, remember
We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan
lumberjim is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2020, 01:41 PM   #12
Beestie
-◊|≡·∙■·∙≡|◊-
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Parts unknown.
Posts: 4,081
This may or may not be helpful but when I'm in that place you are in, an alternative is to find someone in the same or worse shape and lend a hand. It's not so much a fix but it does give you a chance to take your mind off it for a little while.
__________________
Beestie is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2020, 04:57 PM   #13
BigV
Goon Squad Leader
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Seattle
Posts: 27,063
Quote:
Originally Posted by lumberjim View Post
Well now it's not nearly as funny....
Nah, exactly as funny.
__________________
Be Just and Fear Not.
BigV is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2020, 10:17 PM   #14
xoxoxoBruce
The future is unwritten
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 71,105
Quote:
Originally Posted by glatt View Post
Anon, I'm sorry life's kind of a shit sandwich right now.
Life is like toilet paper, you're on a roll or taking shit from some asshole.
__________________
The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.
xoxoxoBruce is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-17-2020, 10:06 AM   #15
BigV
Goon Squad Leader
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Seattle
Posts: 27,063
Quote:
Originally Posted by Beestie View Post
This may or may not be helpful but when I'm in that place you are in, an alternative is to find someone in the same or worse shape and lend a hand. It's not so much a fix but it does give you a chance to take your mind off it for a little while.
I like this, Beestie.

I have found comfort, perspective, and distraction with the the same strategy. I try to remember this tool is always available at the top of my kit.
__________________
Be Just and Fear Not.
BigV is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

All times are GMT -5. The time now is 02:53 AM.


Powered by: vBulletin Version 3.8.1
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.