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Old 02-02-2016, 07:12 AM   #3421
fargon
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Looks like they can go on holiday after all. http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage...day-prize.html
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Old 02-02-2016, 07:22 AM   #3422
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+10 points to footer for douche nozzle
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Old 02-02-2016, 07:52 AM   #3423
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So the mother of 3 says she could really have used the £2,000. I'm sure she would love that money, but if things are really that tight for her, maybe she shouldn't own a horse. It's not exactly an inexpensive hobby.
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Old 02-02-2016, 09:06 AM   #3424
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Sure. What could possibly go wrong?

San Francisco park reopens with new outdoor urinal

******************************************************

Meanwhile, in PA Arizona:

Man gets 18 months' probation in Arizona bestiality case

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Old 02-02-2016, 11:45 AM   #3425
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Old 02-02-2016, 11:03 PM   #3426
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Undertoad View Post
+10 points to footer for douche nozzle
Ha ha! The other day, in a moment of pique, I called someone a douche nozzle while the inch and mm were in the car. The inch was scandalized and as a result the mm became hyper-curious. I did some clever French etymology to allay the inch's embarrassment and then explained how it's used in the US as a shower for lady bits, to satisfy the mm's burgeoning prurience.

It is such a satisfying phrase to say.

Quote:
Originally Posted by glatt View Post
So the mother of 3 says she could really have used the £2,000. I'm sure she would love that money, but if things are really that tight for her, maybe she shouldn't own a horse. It's not exactly an inexpensive hobby.
I know, right. And no one pointed out the obvious irony of a cow owning a horse.
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Old 02-02-2016, 11:18 PM   #3427
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You probably only piqued the inch's prurient interest. Although for her to have been scandalized in the first place, she clearly knew what was what. She now has ammunition with which to confuse and deflect horrified adults when she uses the term at school, though, so it's a win.
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Old 02-02-2016, 11:32 PM   #3428
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Old 02-05-2016, 11:22 AM   #3429
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Woman dies in industrial mixer accident at Utah bakery
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Old 02-05-2016, 11:29 AM   #3430
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Gives me a newfound respect for my Kitchen Aid.
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Old 02-05-2016, 07:21 PM   #3431
footfootfoot
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fargon View Post
Gives me a newfound respect for my Kitchen Aid.
A kitchen Aid can fuck you up for real. Smash every bone in your hand.

When I was in my 20s I worked as a baker and we had a 60 qt Hobart like the one below (pic pulled from the internet) There was a crushed I gallon heavy duty aluminum measuring cup on display as a reminder. One day I was working with Betsy, another baker, and we were checking the consistency of the dough. I put my arm into the mixer to pull the dough from the side of the bowl and for some reason Betsy had a brain fart, actually this rose to the level of a day after Taco Tuesday brain shart, and she pushed the ON button. It's a big-ass 3 phase motor that makes a grunt before it starts moving. I heard the 'grunt' and moved my fucking arm like lightning.

I gave a what the actual fuck? look and she was horrified.

Close fucking call. Those machines will fling around 200 pounds of dough like it's a rag.
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Last edited by footfootfoot; 02-05-2016 at 07:42 PM.
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Old 02-06-2016, 02:55 PM   #3432
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Old 02-08-2016, 06:34 AM   #3433
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People are weird that way. I subbed in a middle school shop years ago. I was showing the kids how to bend sheet metal to make dust pans. A kid from a different section had permission to do some drilling and damned if one of the dust pan crew didn't walk over and push the start while the kid was switching bits. Yeah, it was bloody.
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Old 02-08-2016, 07:39 AM   #3434
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Did he say "I dunno" when you asked him why he did it?
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Old 02-08-2016, 07:49 AM   #3435
footfootfoot
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"I don't like Tuesdays."
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