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Old 04-14-2008, 06:17 AM   #193
Sundae
polaroid of perfection
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: West Yorkshire
Posts: 24,185
I feel like such a loser.
I've been drinking too much recently - I recognised that myself - and I told myself it had to stop this week.
So yesterday afternoon, when I finished in the pub I "allowed" myself one more day before the cut off point of Monday morning.

So I stayed drinking with some of the regulars, right up until closing time.
I suspected one of them was chatting me up, but knowing he had a girlfriend reassured me that it was all harmless fun. Then he walked me home and I snogged him and we even had a bit of a (clothes on) fumble.

I feel awful.
Part of it is drink-guilt (where I feel horrible about myself the next day regardless) but a lot is just shame.

I can't do anything about it now, except promise myself it won't happen again. I just wanted to confess to someone I think, hoping to get it out of my head!

Oh and Dana I think you're right about the waking up thing. I'm calmer now - I tend to lose it a bit when it's just happened. I haven't really seen him all weekend and it wouldn't be right to bring it up now. I might mention it casually at the end of the week, just in terms of "I'm going to have a lovely lie-in on Saturday, I'm really looking forward to it." That was it's a positive reminder not an angry response.
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