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-   -   What might be making you a tad apprehensive, but might not, as it's too soon to tell (http://cellar.org/showthread.php?t=23955)

Undertoad 03-03-2014 05:09 PM

I used to think that the brain was the most wonderful organ in my body.

. . . Then I realized — well, look what's telling me this.

DanaC 03-03-2014 05:17 PM

Got some new underwear!

...well, new to me

Undertoad 03-03-2014 05:18 PM

People ask me how much I weigh. I tell them, 145 pounds, naked. That is, if that scale outside the drugstore is anything to go by.

footfootfoot 03-04-2014 11:04 AM

What might be making you a tad apprehensive, but might not, as it's too soon ...
 
How is Steven wright not on that list?
Kathleen Madigan?

infinite monkey 03-04-2014 01:39 PM

i had a dream the other night. i was asking someone about Gary Wright. whoever i was talking to said 'oh, that one-liner guy.' i was like, no, that's stephen wright. gary wright did Dream Weaver.

the next day i got into my car and the radio station had just started playing Dream Weaver. seriously. ;)

also, my older bro had emo as the entertainer for a conference. he has pics with him. i'm the envy.

my favorite emo is him talking about being alone at night in the dark. he says he starts singing (in a shaky scared voice): whenever i feel afraid, i whistle a happy tune...

then he hears a voice: thanks, i thought i'd never find you in the dark.

Undertoad 03-04-2014 01:48 PM

Steven Wright is #12 on my list, as is Eddie Izzard and Lewis Black.

footfootfoot 03-04-2014 06:51 PM

I'm going to have to check out emo philips again

DanaC 03-05-2014 04:32 AM

Stephen wright = comedy genius.

The ski lift story was always my favourite. And the one about burglars breaking into his house and replacing all his stuff with exact replicas.

And Izzard I always loved. Just what a guy.

infinite monkey 03-05-2014 08:21 AM

I still use that line. As "Oh crap, someone broke into your house while you were gone and replaced everything with an exact replica!"

That or "everywhere is walking distance if you have the time." Or "you can't have everything. Where would you put it?"

Steven Wright reversed the peephole on his door. He said he could see people coming from miles away. "Who is it? Who is it going to be when you get here?"

Must've watched his stand up routine a hundred times.

Here are pages and pages of his jokes:

http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/au...en_wright.html

Excuse me while I go laugh for an hour or so!

infinite monkey 03-05-2014 08:25 AM

Last year I went fishing with Salvador Dali. He was using a dotted line. He caught every other fish.
--Steven Wright

Here's a good tagline: Is it weird in here, or is it just me?

infinite monkey 03-05-2014 08:36 AM

Here's a clip of emo from my old favorite show: Dr Katz Professional Therapist


glatt 03-05-2014 08:49 AM

I loved Dr. Katz.

footfootfoot 03-05-2014 09:53 AM

It's a small world but I wouldn't want to have to paint it.

Another great Steven Wright line

DanaC 03-05-2014 11:40 AM

Oh I used to love Dr Katz!

glatt 03-24-2014 01:49 PM

Mildly apprehensive, as it's half a world away, but Ebola outbreaks are back.

orthodoc 03-24-2014 05:16 PM

Ebola is so virulent, it defeats itself (virally speaking). It kills too fast for it to propagate and really get out into the larger population. That's no comfort for those who succumb, I realize, but it isn't a big epidemic risk. If it became a little less virulent, we'd be in big trouble.

glatt 03-25-2014 08:28 AM

Feel bad for the health care workers who are treating the fever patients before they realize it's Ebola, and wind up catching it themselves.

orthodoc 03-25-2014 11:19 AM

Absolutely. :(

footfootfoot 03-25-2014 12:47 PM

I'm battling a mild case of Ebola Zaire right now. Or possibly it's just the tail end of a cold.

Clodfobble 04-01-2014 10:47 PM

Got some standardized test scores from the school today.

Minifobette is reading at a fourth grade level, and she can answer all sorts of comprehension questions about what she's read. But on the "listening" portion of the test, where they read an equivalent passage *out loud* and then ask similar comprehension questions, she's in the 20th percentile of Kindergarteners, effectively on a preschool level. It's like her ears don't work!

(Actually, what it's really like is the auditory processing portion of her brain doesn't work, which we pretty much already knew, but we didn't realize the discrepancy was quite so large.)

orthodoc 04-01-2014 11:08 PM

If she's a visual learner, good for her. On the other hand, has her hearing been tested? Hearing deficits in kids can escape notice for a long time. If she hasn't had a formal hearing assessment, now is the time. She may hear certain frequencies very well but still have significant loss at speech frequencies. It's also possible that she may have trouble with speech discrimination. Children should have an audiologist test their hearing, to be sure that all relevant tests are done.

After all that, she may hear wonderfully but not process instructions. Before assuming that, however, it makes sense to check whether she isn't hearing the instructions in the first place.

monster 04-02-2014 07:26 AM

:corn:

Clodfobble 04-02-2014 02:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by orthodoc
If she's a visual learner, good for her. On the other hand, has her hearing been tested? Hearing deficits in kids can escape notice for a long time. If she hasn't had a formal hearing assessment, now is the time. She may hear certain frequencies very well but still have significant loss at speech frequencies. It's also possible that she may have trouble with speech discrimination. Children should have an audiologist test their hearing, to be sure that all relevant tests are done.

Oh yes, she's been tested repeatedly. It's a requirement, first to enter ECI (state-run special needs program for kids under age 3,) then to enter PPCD (public special needs preschool program when they turn 3,) then to be in public school with an IEP. If anything, she's got hyperacusis across the board.

There's a strong possibility, however, that it's not an actual neurological processing problem, but rather an attention problem. She may just be getting impatient listening to the teacher talk more slowly than she'd like, and letting her mind wander. When I read chapter books to her at night, she interrupts me all the time to ask questions about words halfway down the page from where we are. She's really just using me as a lap to sit on while she reads the book herself.

Anyway, it's in the "tad apprehensive" thread because I'm not really worried about it. As long as she's given a textbook, she'll always be fine. But if she gets a teacher who conveys lots of information verbally, it could turn into a problem later on.

BigV 04-02-2014 09:51 PM

plus, it could be a problem when you get tired of writing notes to her for family communication.

xoxoxoBruce 04-02-2014 11:22 PM

Mother's have ways of making themselves understood... even the family pets know what Mama wants... of course the cats don't care.

Sundae 04-03-2014 06:51 AM

I'm seriously considering relocating.
Again.
But I have nothing to live for right now, and can't afford to live here (Aylesbury) so it might save my life for a while.

Halifax, Dani suggests.
Bradford also a possibility as a (rival) supermarket has their Head Office there.
Unlikely to be able to stay with the company I work for, just because they follow the money ie the places they have branches have property prices out of my range.

Wages will be lower if I move North, but the wage to rent ratio would still be far easier to live on. Rent here is grossly inflated by being technically within commuter range of London. It's a trek - and an expensive one - but my bro does it after all. And there's been a ripple effect outwards from previous commuter towns.

I shouldn't complain - Ste & E will pay off their mortgage in the next few years so will be sitting pretty, and the inflated market is what will fund the 'rents for the rest of their life; they bought at 18k and will sell at over 170k. Good for them, they sacrificed a lot early on and have provided a haven for me for the last few years.

So.
Basically Mum & Dad will help me move financially. Not even as a loan, although I'd do everything I could to pay them back when I am settled - up front fees like bonds, moving costs, deposits, acting as a guarantor, travel costs for scouting for properties/ jobs etc.

But.
I really do need to have a job in place first.
And jobsies is hard to come by.
And I already have one I really enjoy (apart from Thursdays, and even that is getting easier, if not actually enjoyable).
And it's all going to be SO tight, time wise, because the 'rents can't bankroll me (loan me) really until their house sale goes through, but the money will literally go into their account on the day the keys are exchanged. The day Cherry is literally homeless.

Argh.

But if this is the path I choose, it's one Mum is really, really keen on.
And if she has to borrow to make it happen she will, in the full and certain knowledge that she has money coming in.
And although she brushes off my assurances that costs and rent and admin fees and all will be paid back, I really would.

Oh, just for comparison - I can rent a room in someone else's house for 400pcm in Aylesbury. I can rent a one bedroom flat in Bradford for 295.

limey 04-03-2014 05:44 PM

It's going to be a big change however you slice it. Life a little further away from London, with its big prices is just as full of opportunities and challenges (and I know you know that already, Sundae). I've already said to you if I can help on anyway,then please let me know. The Limey household is rooting for you! xxx


Sent by thought transference

Sundae 04-04-2014 03:40 PM

Thanks hon.
You and Dani are my lifelines as ever, especially in terms of emotional support and practical advice.

If I won the Lottery tomorrow (yes, my age-old refrain) I'd stay in Aylesbury. I love being near the 'rents as it happens. Even if I only had enough to live mortgage/ rent free then I'd stay in my little supermarket job quite happily, griping about Bakery and lack of communication from Managers and playing the Who Had the Stupidest Customer game (which I win because I made the game up OF COURSE).

I can cope with a provincial town.
I can live with a low salary, although you wouldn't get me turning down a pay rise...
But right here and right now I can't afford to. Not long term and keeping my sanity.

So I'm going back to the Doctors next week to explain my situation - re currently being under stress - and see if I can get them to give me an upgrade on my anxiety meds, and a couple of months for good measure, while my pre-pay card is valid.

Luckily I never told any healthcare professionals about my suicide attempt the other week, so there shouldn't be a reason for them not to allow me tablets. Not that I would try with those meds anyway, I looked them up and it's almost impossible, but GPs get funny about things like that.

I've asked at work about the way internal transfers are handled.
Our new Manager said if I told him which store I wanted to transfer to he would make enquiries for me. Might be a potential route to take. Need to look at how far out I'd have to live to make it viable re transport costs etc.

Maybe I could even talk the 'rents into helping me get a scooter. I've always dreamed of one.
Totally impractical of course, where would I put the bales of hay? ;)

Oh, Mum said she whiled away some time online this afternoon waiting for the hospital to call back (Dad's in for routine investigation and they've kept him overnight). Looking at places in Leeds, Bradford, Halifax etc for me. And the Universities and hospitals for jobs. When I say she'd happily help me relocate I do mean it. This isn't me going cap in hand and begging for money. She'd far rather I moved away (well you gotta appreciate that, right?) than scratched a bare living here and end up back in a Mental Health unit.

Clodfobble 04-04-2014 04:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sundae
Luckily I never told any healthcare professionals about my suicide attempt the other week, so there shouldn't be a reason for them not to allow me tablets.

I love you, and I hope you stay with us, Cherry.

infinite monkey 04-05-2014 10:26 AM

Sundae, I'm glad your parents are going to help you out. It's nice they'll be able to do that. I don't know where I'd be right now without the help of my parents years ago. They helped me because they wanted to, but also because they could. I think a lot of parents want to help their kids with a hand up when they need it; just that not all can. Bless your mom and dad.

Hang in there...this may be the start of the greatest adventure of your life!

Sundae 04-09-2014 01:55 AM

Applied for five jobs last night. Funny how much harder it is to do online... At one point I just howled and walked away.
Went back though, temper tantrums don't equal a living wage.

Applied for one job within my present company. There is a quicker and easier way to do it, but the vacancy closed last night and I thought it better to apply as a 'civilian' than miss the opportunity entirely. I said as such in the Additional Information section; glad I made an initial approach to new new Department Manager, however casual.

Mum has offered to have Diz put in a cattery if I can't get him into foster care.
He'd hate it like poison, but he'd be alive and I'd be back as soon as I could...

fargon 04-09-2014 08:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sundae (Post 896353)

Mum has offered to have Diz put in a cattery if I can't get him into foster care.
He'd hate it like poison, but he'd be alive and I'd be back as soon as I could...

EEK!!! Oh no Cherry, If I could I would keep Diz Kitty for you.

Sundae 04-09-2014 09:57 AM

Got an interview next Tuesday (current employers)!
Wow, they move fast...

DanaC 04-09-2014 10:41 AM

Interesting developments all round!

What's the job?

Sundae 04-09-2014 12:46 PM

Same department as I'm in now, although that covers a multitude of roles.

limey 04-09-2014 03:55 PM

Oh my! I'll be keeping my everythings crossed for you!


Sent by thought transference

DanaC 04-09-2014 04:01 PM

Good luck hon:)

Griff 04-09-2014 05:49 PM

Good luck!

glatt 04-10-2014 08:52 AM

That's wonderful! It would be fantastic if it worked out.

Sundae 04-10-2014 11:18 AM

OMG - just had the hardest online assessment EVAH.
(Rival supermarket)

Multi-tasking test, apparently.
A five figure sum to mark true or false, okay all numbers under ten, but an example might be
6 - 9 + 7 + 3 - 5 = 3
Thank goodness for my recent sojourn in Key Stage One, learning number bonds alongside the children and marking Awesome Addition and the rest twice a week. I genuinely have trouble with numbers that I have fought hard to find ways around.

At the same time checking a six letter set of random letters for repetition; correct if any one letter is repeated. I found it helped to say them out loud.

At the same time as catching a descending ball in a bucket by moving the mouse left and right.

Oh yeah and each section times out.

What's that you say?
No, I'm not applying to be CEO of the company.
The vacancy under which my assessment was sent was that of Catering Assistant.
(Actually bottom of my list, because when it comes to cooking I'm nowhere near as good at multi-tasking as my ball in bucket skills may suggest).
Still it all goes on my file for the other vacancies I've applied for at that company.

And these days we all know a job is a job is a job.
If it keeps the Dizcat and I together and I can make an honest living I'll jump through any hoops I have to.

Carruthers 04-10-2014 01:05 PM

There is a special place in hell reserved for the illegitimates who devise these tests. No doubt they describe themselves as 'consultants' of some sort or another.
They are all cut from the same cloth as the pestilential individuals who gave us 'Human Resources' when we coped perfectly well with 'Personnel'.
There is little doubt that they all use, what a world weary friend calls, bolloxspeak. (Spelling varies).
If there's one small consolation in becoming ever so slightly older, it is that you can spot a fraud, spiv, crook, conman or all purpose charlatan from several light years away. A pox on all their houses.
I wouldn't put it past any of them to try to sell you a bridge in the course of your test.

Very best of luck in all your endeavours, Sundae.

PS I found the above outburst strangely cathartic.:D

monster 06-27-2014 08:19 PM

Just ordered 100 junky personalized sunglasses for swim team online from a company I really can't find many reviews on (did talk to real person before decided to go ahead). $200. What if they're a bigger pile of shite than one expects for $2/pair? $2/pair is great, but $200 is a lot to throw away. They could be awesome, or it could be a total rip off and they people who agreed to go in on it with me if we decide not to use team funds for it could welch on the deal (it went on my credit card........ but they could be the most awesome fun thing about the season that the kids will remember forever. imagine th team picture...........they sunglasses are very similar to the ones that last year's coach had that they all kept stealing and wearing....



(hey.... if it's cool, we could get cellar sunglasses......)

monster 06-27-2014 08:20 PM

.....with the monkey on one lens and the tripewriter on the other and arms with th web address......

sexobon 06-28-2014 04:31 PM

... we'll wear our sunglasses at night, maybe go on a mission from god, and people will ask Who's that behind that monkey's ass?

DanaC 06-29-2014 05:32 AM

I signed up to be a mystery shopper. Tomorrow I have my first assignment. I have to go into the store and go to three different departments, looking at three different things. I downloaded and printed off the brief and questionnaire - fuck me there's a lot of stuff to notice and remember! Like how many customers are in the department, how many staff, what are they doing, how long til they approach, what did they say etc. As well as physical descriptions of the staff member I speak to etc. And hold it all in my head til I can get somewhere private to make notes.

I am not the world's most observant person *gulp*. Gotta really try hard to be consciously aware of stuff!

limey 06-29-2014 07:41 AM

Is there a way you can set up a checklist on you phone for some of it? Everyone's always fiddling with their phones, after all.
And take sneaky photos of the people, to help jog your memory?

footfootfoot 06-29-2014 08:59 AM

That sounds like fun. How does it pay?

orthodoc 06-30-2014 09:44 PM

A new beginning in nine hours (or so). On to the next, and to hell with the past.

DanaC 07-01-2014 04:05 AM

Ha! That was good fun. The checklist wasn't necessary - I managed to remember what it was I was supposed to ask / look for etc. The only difficulty is remembering in detail what i said, how they answered and so on - as wel as specifically what we looked at (full description of all products shown).

Great thing about dept stores: they have toilets :P So, after 1st dept, went into loos and quickly wrote up a few bits and bobs - number of peple in store, number of staff, physical description of staff etc.

Paywise - it's alright - 21 for this job. I was in the store for about 90 mins, and spent about 40 mins going through forms afterwards, and the phone call I'm waiting for to give my verbal report will take about 30 mins. I also spent about 20 mins in advance reading through all questions and getting clear in my head what i was doing - i suspect that will take less time on subsequent jobs. All in around 3 hours, so 7 per hour for this one.

But - as I say, I reckon it won't take as long to initial task read through and form filling on later jobs - so hopefully that will go up to 8 or 9 per hour.

It was great fun though. Felt a slight twinge of guilt when they were being so lovely. Very impressed with the staff at the cosmetics dept. I am the world's least make-uppy woman. I just have zero interest in cosmetics - I do occasinally put a bit of lippy and mascara on, but rarely, and I just buy cheap stuff because I really don't value it.

Yet: if I'd have had money in the bank yesterday, I'd have come out of that store with foundation (28), moisturiser(40) lipstick (22), bronzer (33) and a brush (22) - and I am still thinking I might, when I eventually have cash to spend again, go back there and get the stuff, because it's awesome.

And they are awesome. I basically ended up with a free makeover - full works, went home feeling a million dollars :p

DanaC 07-01-2014 04:14 AM

Also: tried on some drop dead gorgeous outfits :p.

I basically got paid to go play dress up and get a free makeover hahaha.

Aliantha 07-01-2014 04:16 AM

And now you can pay ur phone bill. Haha

DanaC 07-01-2014 04:24 AM

haha. True.

Next1 07-01-2014 04:47 AM

The end. Or is it the beginning? I don't know. I'm just incredibly tired of not being. Of being. Being. Enough?

I was enough once or at least I thought I was. Then it all fell down. But then I built it again. Then it caught fire. Or was it set ablaze? Hard to remember because after that was the flood. But things dry out and others are replaced. Then all is shiny and new again. Then the earthquake. The earthquake was hard because while the others were natural the catastrophe was of my own doing. The earthquake though? That was a shock to say the least.

But I'm a builder. I'm pretty good at it really. Next is my favorite word. Or maybe it's fuck. Either way life goes on. And on. And on. On. On. On. It just doesn't stop. Because it's wrong to stop. Because everyone is counting on you to continue. Not succeed, but continue. To build. And sweep up the ashes. And build. And sweep up the rubble. But what if I don't want to sweep anymore? What if I want to lie down in the ashes? To let my head slip beneath the waves? Why can't I just pull the rubble over me?

Why?

glatt 07-01-2014 07:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by orthodoc (Post 903351)
A new beginning in nine hours (or so). On to the next, and to hell with the past.

Good luck!

glatt 07-01-2014 07:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Next1 (Post 903381)
Either way life goes on. And on. And on. On. On. On. It just doesn't stop.

My dad once said that "human life is very long." And I thought it was a kind of funny notion at the time, but I remember it years later. It's very true. I have come to understand it even better now, years later. I feel like I'm on my 4th lifetime now. My life doesn't suck. It's pretty damn good, all things considered, but there are times... And I find myself wondering what the point of it all is.

It's like that old John Cougar song, back when he called himself that: "oh yeah, life goes on, long after the thrill of living is gone."

But then little things come up that are maybe not quite thrilling, but fun. Go find a zip line course. That will put some pep in your step. Focus on those fun things that happen occasionally, and if they aren't happening, make them happen.

limey 07-01-2014 07:52 AM

Hello Next1. Glatt has some good advice here. Do post again and let us know how things are.

footfootfoot 07-02-2014 06:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DanaC (Post 903374)


It was great fun though. Felt a slight twinge of guilt when they were being so lovely. Very impressed with the staff at the cosmetics dept. I am the world's least make-uppy woman. I just have zero interest in cosmetics - I do occasinally put a bit of lippy and mascara on, but rarely, and I just buy cheap stuff because I really don't value it.


And they are awesome. I basically ended up with a free makeover - full works, went home feeling a million dollars :p

So not the Rude Sales girls? Can't link atm, from Man/Woman.

monster 07-02-2014 07:52 PM

And where are the pix of the glammed-up Dana?

DanaC 07-03-2014 03:59 AM

Not the rude sales girls no :P

Pics are on mum's ipad waiting to be emailed to me so I can post!

footfootfoot 07-03-2014 01:40 PM

1 Attachment(s)
I got the cheek bones right.
;)


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