Hilarious names
Some people have such funny names... I know it's not their fault, its more of what were there parents thinking or a well-I-guess-it-would-be-okay-in their-country. Share some of these names - they have to be real people you've actually met or seen. No friends of a friend of a friend.
My two submissions - which really have a lot of 3rd grade playground toilet humor:
Gangli Wang
Willie Dong
well, i really did go to school with:
-James Bond
-Raquel Welch
-Conan Doyle
-Sherman Tank
i really have met:
-Richard Head
-Richard Long
-Guy White (who was obviously black)
I know the following people:
Phuc Vu (pronounced Fuck You)
Long Dong
and Bob Neal.
Tom Smelstoys
Mr Nusspickle ( first name really doesnt matter, ddoes it?)
Terry Cloth
Knock& ping (twins)
no kidding !
Merry Christmas
(No kidding)
i also had a customer in the car biz = Richard Wadd. the general rule should be that only a very few last names can safely be tied with Richard.
Oh, I nearly forgot. I knew a girl named Brandy Wine.
My mother attended high school with the brothers Pullen. Peter and Dick Pullen, to be exact. They were twins.
We also used to have a podiatrist listed in the KC phone book by the name of Dr. Charles Footlich (pronounce, presumably, footlick).
I went to high school with a guy named Karl Schmuck.
He's no longer listed on classmates.com, but he apparently changed his name at the earliest possible opportunity.
There was a kid in my elementary school named Parker Wiggins III. Young Master Wiggins was unfortunately plump. Double whammy. Poor guy. I occasionally wonder what happened to him.
We have a list of such names at work, and I was checking the secretary's computer tonight but couldn't find it. I hope that it's not lost ... it was our second most precious document, the first most precious being the "dead list" ... a catalog of dead patients, dates, and known cause of death. My favorite on that list is "4th victim of serial killer." Most of the others are pretty run of the mill ... OD, hanging, self-inflicted gunshot, etc.
my best friend at age 6- Titi Lola Palmer
husband & wife: Hairy & Dimples Cheeks
Mary Moist, lives on Fantasy Lane in Palmdale. for reals.
I went to summer camp once with a girl named Bunny. Really. Not a nickname. I can't remember her last name, but she'd been born on Easter, so her parents named her Bunny.
There was a girl who worked for the same company I work for--I was going through the resumes when I saw her name and asked how it was pronounced. I was told that she was from Africa and that it was a traditional name.
The explanation of her name was actually pretty interesting.
Her name is spelled D'lle, and, believe it or not, is SILENT.
I wondered, if the name is silent, what's the point?
And then you have to wonder: when her mother called for her, what did she call out?
... she'd been born on Easter, so her parents named her Bunny.
Awww! That is sooo cute! :apaw:
I've known a woman named Tequila Bender and a man with the unlikely name of Brilliance Royal. While Tequila more than lived up to her name, Brilliance, sadly, did not.
My sister used to work at Children's Hosp. of Phila. (CHOP) and she took care of a baby named Stevie Nicks Nagowski. This was in the early 80's.
Oh, and I've known a Rhiannon or two.
Awww! That is sooo cute! :apaw:
Yeah, but can you imagine say, a supreme court justice, or the president, being named BUNNY? I kinda felt sorry for her because people found it hard to take her seriously because of her name. I think they thought she was dingy...kinda like a Buffy-type.
As a nickname, it's cute. But as a given name, it's kinda mean.
This one isn't official, because I didn't know the people personally and so can't prove it, but a friend of mine had an artist friend whose last name was December. Aliasha (my friend, whose name I always thought was so pretty--it's traditional Scottish, and is pronounced Ah-lee-ah-shah) told me this woman named her kids October and November.
Yeah, I've heard of-but can't vouch for-two kids supposedly known as Le'Monjello and Or'Angejello. It's an old hospital joke, not sure if it's true.
Well, there IS that Jazz (?) singer, old, old, jazz singer--he may be dead now--but his name was Nosmo King.
Yup. From the sign... No Smoking.
Gaelic names can be odd. I knew someone named Siobhan - pronounced Shavahn.
I like unusual names...but I draw the line at naming my child after a no smoking sign. Sorry.
My daughter's middle names are Illyrica and Winter. She was born in December, and we actually had snow that year, plus it's a pretty name. Illyrica was the name of an ancient Greek city; I saw it in a book and thought it sounded musical. She has a normal first name, though. I know how other kids can be.
I really like gaelic names, as you can see by my nick. A pagan friend of mine used to joke that I looked like an elf, so I took the name Sidhe (even though technically, a Sidhe is Fey), and it's pronounced "Shee."
My drama teacher as a kid was named Babs George.
Except "Babs" was a nickname--her real first name was "Bubetta."
I know brothers named Hunter and Forest (one R) Green. Their mother is Violet Green.
I can't quite place her in the box of 64.
My brother-in-law had a teacher named Candy Cane (dunno if that was the spelling). I knew a Mercedes Benz.
My drama teacher as a kid was named Babs George.
Except "Babs" was a nickname--her real first name was "Bubetta."
ACK! Poor woman...
There was a girl who worked for the same company I work for--I was going through the resumes when I saw her name and asked how it was pronounced. I was told that she was from Africa and that it was a traditional name.
The explanation of her name was actually pretty interesting.
Her name is spelled D'lle, and, believe it or not, is SILENT.
I wondered, if the name is silent, what's the point?
And then you have to wonder: when her mother called for her, what did she call out?
So what did she go by?
I knew a Yoo Hoo. Cambodian?
My college roomate had a highschool teacher named Harry Dickie.
My brother-in-law had a teacher named Candy Cane (dunno if that was the spelling).
I knew a RE agent named Candy Kane.
Prudential.
In Oklahoma these names aren't really unusual since there are a lot of Indians here, but there are last names such as "Runs Like A Bear"....I know of a few others but I'm blank right now.......dammit now I'll think about it until I end up flipping through the phone book.......
one of my closest friends kids are Hunter, Gunnar, and Sage (a common CA desert plant). Yes, they re supporters of the 2nd amendment.
I worked with a guy a while ago who, after "Dances with Wolves" came out, his wife started calling him "Reclines with Remote".
As long as I'm reminiscing - there was another guy at the same place who was short, stocky, and had a dour disposition. He, of course, was known as Grumpy.
Old friend: Gary Smelley
Business aquaintance: Dick Knots
So what did she go by?
Her last name. At least that's what everyone at work called her. I can't remember her last name, though.
Katkeeper once bought a car from Dusty Rhoades.
I went to high school with a guy named Karl Schmuck.
My folks played cards with John and Harriet Schmuck most every Saturday night. :thumb:
Don't leave out the famous Dick Trickle.
Giving your kid more names than fits in a standard form is mean.
I went to school with a Harry Bush and I worked with a Jane who married Dick Organ.. Not Richard.. but Dick. And they of course have a large collection of Dick and Jane memorabilia.
That's better than a large organ collection. ;)
Katkeeper once bought a car from Dusty Rhoades.
The pro wrestler?
Nah, the guy from ZZ Topp.
There is also a tilesetter in my town(male) named Patty Williams.
I'd kill my parents.
I don't get why it's funny. Other than being an adult who keeps a childhood nickname.
My friend works data entry, and he comes across alot of names. Some of them he's given to me:
Steven Manly Smith
Elizabeth Goodbody
Anne Marie Surprise
Aneda Dollar
Thorn Bun Lay
Donald Madewell
James Manlove
Jeffrey D Funkhouser
Larry Leatherwood
Tyrone Stammers
Pat Nutt
Herbert C Bumgarner
Crystal Bonga
Marie Fast
Jerome A Flake
Linda Lovely
Katkeeper once bought a car from Dusty Rhoades.
I know Dusty Rhodes. Went to school with him. Have broken bread and countless beers with him. Not the ZZ Top guy.
Homer and Marge were my wife's grandparents. unfortunately they weren't simpsons.
How could I forget a friends parents, Richard and Bonnie Jean. They had personalized license plates, "DAD DICK" and "MOM BJ". The kids had them get them changed real quick-like.
I was just reminded of a girl I knew in college... Honey Goodenough. It was pronounced just as if it were two words.
From Grade 8 to Grade 12 (toughest 9 years of my life, har har), I had two classmates:
Michael Jackson, and
Tina Turner.
They were both white.
In my fraternity was an alumnus named Peter Parker.
Working as a clerk in a photo lab, a customer came in and dropped off film.
"glossy or matt?"
"Name?"
Sara Grewcock.
I lost it. She was pissed, but seemed that I wasn't the first.
At another job w/ a mail order co. we kept a list of fun names, two I remember were Dutch Fluck and Linda Lustgarden.
I knew a Funkhouser
My friend works data entry, and he comes across alot of names. Some of them he's given to me:
~~snip~~
A guy from my High School class was working on a computer system for a hospital while a student at MIT. He made up a couple hundred normal sounding names to debug the software.
When they implemented it he couldn't believe the names of the real patients that went into it. Half of them sounded nonsensical. :)
Damn, footfootfoot, you've reminded me of another.
An old coworker of mine was named Brandon Adcock. Which wasn't SO bad--except our work emails followed the standard pattern of first-initial-last-name, which made his email badcock.
He was a really shy, nice guy too. I always felt bad typing it.
Damn, footfootfoot, you've reminded me of another.
An old coworker of mine was named Brandon Adcock. Which wasn't SO bad--except our work emails followed the standard pattern of first-initial-last-name, which made his email badcock.
He was a really shy, nice guy too. I always felt bad typing it.
I got into the habit of calling some people by their email aliases... so I may have called Brandon badcock... but only if I knew he could take it. If he was nice, I probably wouldn't. I was lucky because my email alias was my first name.
Badcock!
NO Biscuit!
A tangent: I had a bunch of bumper stickers that said "bad cop, no donut" I was not reckless enough to use them, but gave tehm to friends who were cops and they loved them.
The whole BAD XXXXX, NO biscuit thing has been stuck in my head for a while.
Reminds me of another one. I went to school with Renee Gorges (pronounced 'gorgeous'). She was too.
I used to do medical research and phoning.
I once ran across a Dr Nutt. Occupation? Psychiatrist.
On a related note, I also once called a psychiatrist, normal name but had the most INTERESTING answering machine message...
It was his voice, calm and relaxed. He described a beautiful beach, blue ocean, calm breeze, with ocean sounds playing in the background. Then he said that he was on vacation and would return next week. From Aruba. I had to share that one with the other slaves. We all took turns calling that whenever we felt stressed.
I, of course, had to leave a message thanking him for the calming message and told him that I called whenever I felt too stressed out. This with the noisy background and the usual office hustle and bustle so he could hear THAT. Sometimes I'm ashamed of myself.
Brian
I used to do medical research and phoning.
I once ran across a Dr Nutt. Occupation? Psychiatrist.
So his clients, by definition, were Nutt-cases. Right?
I just had a thought. Do people with funny names get bummed out when they do Google vanity searches and see threads like this in the results?
I went to a parochial school once, and our principal's name was Michael Jackson. He was white, too...incidentally, he hated MJ, and even suspended a couple of kids who talked about him (this was in 7th grade, when MJ was kinda popular). He went by Mike Jackson....
Damn, footfootfoot, you've reminded me of another.
An old coworker of mine was named Brandon Adcock. Which wasn't SO bad--except our work emails followed the standard pattern of first-initial-last-name, which made his email badcock.
He was a really shy, nice guy too. I always felt bad typing it.
That's a common naming convention, one I've used over the years. Deviation from the convention makes it less consistent and therefore less useful, however, once I made the executive decision to include the middle initial in Pamela Hart's email address.
I once ran across a Dr Nutt. Occupation? Psychiatrist.
Brian
I once had a dentist named... Dr. Paine. My jaw still isn't right.
I once worked at a hospital that had a Doctor Doctor.
Where I live two of my neighbours are James Brown and Jimmy Morrison. And I share a birthday with one Matt Brown.
Although we call her by her middle name, Patrice, my girlfriend's name is Janet Jackson.
I went to school with twins Richard and Peter Stiffe
RESURRECTION!!!
[ATTACH]43611[/ATTACH]
Knew a dude named John Thomas.
[Size=1]John Thomas = a guy's junk, fyi.[/Size]
Robert N Hood
goes by Bob, though. Rob N Hood would be more fun.
"Bobbin' Hood" would be a great title for a gay porno.
Is that all you ever think about? Jeez. You and your gay porn.
Here's one for all those "good Christians" out there..
Is there any name more hilarious than "Lu Ann Ballew"
:censored:
NPR
by Bill Chappell
August 12, 201310:58 AM
Judge Orders Baby's Name Changed From 'Messiah'
A Tennessee judge ordered a baby's name changed from Messiah to Martin last week,
after the boy's parents went to court to fight over their son's last name.
The boy's mother, Jaleesa Martin, says she was shocked by the decision
and that she'll appeal the judge's order to rename her baby Martin DeShawn McCullough.
"The word Messiah is a title and it's a title that has only been earned
by one person and that one person is Jesus Christ," says Child Support Magistrate
Lu Ann Ballew, in an interview with Knoxville's WBIR TV.
Here's one for all those "good Christians" out there..
Is there any name more hilarious than "Lu Ann Ballew"
I'm not sure if this is an accent thing, or just a typical inability to get a joke by me. I'm practically an airport, the amount of jokes on here that fly over my head.
I know it's the death of a joke to explain it, so feel free to PM me instead!
The lesson here is to be careful what you insist on bringing before a judge. Family court judges can do whatever the fuck they want.
The upshot is, the kid's name hasn't actually legally been changed. It has only been ordered to be changed. If both parents are unhappy with the new name, they can just ignore the order and nothing will ever come of it. But if the dad is happy with the new first name (which also gives the kid his last name, which is what he went to court for in the first place,) then the dad can use the court order to officially change the name on the birth certificate.
I'm not sure if this is an accent thing, or just a typical inability to get a joke by me. I'm practically an airport, the amount of jokes on here that fly over my head.
I know it's the death of a joke to explain it, so feel free to PM me instead!
it's the ... "hypocrisy" of it all. one person with a funny sounding name (it just sounds funny, say it and hear it) rejecting another person's funny sounding name "messiah". Really?
I thought there was a ref I wasn't getting.
Thanks :)
Naming your kid Messiah…
is pretty much guaranteed to give him a complex, isn't it?
I went to a dentist with the French name-"Sanchagrin", which in English means 'without pain'. He wasn't too bad looking either; those baby blues looking down into your mouth....
Lu Ann Ballew, in an interview with Knoxville's WBIR TV.
I wonder who Lu Ann Ballew
Yesterday, I met a man named Grover.
True Story®.
Ok, Peter Starr, motorcycle filmmaker extraordinaire, has a name a porn actor would kill for, but, "Wonder Wang"??? Come on, now...
[ATTACH]45274[/ATTACH]
[SIZE="1"]from 10/2013 issue of Motorcyclist[/SIZE]
I was gonna post this in 'Questionable Headlines', but, it's more of a name thing:
[ATTACH]45275[/ATTACH]
NPR
Judge Orders Baby's Name Changed From 'Messiah'
Lu Ann Ballew blown away...
http://www.nytimes.com/2013/09/19/us/woman-allowed-to-name-son-messiah.html?ref=todayspaper
NY Times
THE ASSOCIATED PRESS
September 18, 2013
Tennessee: Woman Allowed to Name Son Messiah
A woman will be allowed to name her 8-month-old son Messiah,
a judge ruled Wednesday, overturning an order from another judge
who said the name should be changed because
“Messiah is a title that is held only by Jesus Christ.”
Lu Ann Ballew, a child support magistrate, ordered Jaleesa Martin
to change the name at a paternity hearing last month.
[COLOR="DarkRed"]At an appeal hearing on Wednesday, Chancellor Telford E. Forgety Jr. of Cocke County
overturned the decision, finding that the judge had acted unconstitutionally.[/COLOR]
Ok, Peter Starr, motorcycle filmmaker extraordinaire, has a name a porn actor would kill for, but, "Wonder Wang"??? Come on, now...
And all the roads that lead you there were winding
And all the lights that light the way are blinding
There are many things that I would like to say to you
But I don't know how
I said maybe
You're gonna be the one that saves me
And after all
You're my wonder wang o/'
... as in:
"75": silence
"184": silence
"493": scattered laughter
:confused:: ?
:right:: "Some of them hadn't heard that joke before."
.
Lu Ann Ballew blown away...
http://www.nytimes.com/2013/09/19/us/woman-allowed-to-name-son-messiah.html?ref=todayspaper
NY Times
THE ASSOCIATED PRESS
September 18, 2013
Tennessee: Woman Allowed to Name Son Messiah
this is reassuring
I work with someone named Bingo Ildefonso. No, really.
Many of the upper class here acquire names in the nursery that they never quite shake.
Tiggy, Binky, Sooty etc. Not the people I tend to have tea with though.
one of the first iotd's ever
Mary had a little lamb
It had a sooty foot
And into Mary's
Bread and jam
His sooty foot
He put
That's Wonderwang!
Numberwang:
[YOUTUBE]qjOZtWZ56lc[/YOUTUBE]
That's the stupidest thing I've laughed my ass off at in a long time.
:lol2:
This just has to be real:
[ATTACH]45685[/ATTACH]
:lol2:
[ATTACH]46441[/ATTACH]
:lol2:
Heheheheh. Yeah, that's funny.
Here's one that made me laugh recently, whilst listening to a report about the House of Lords:
Susan Garden, Baroness Garden of Frognal - a British Liberal Democrat politician and member of the House of Lords.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lady_Garden
Usually referred to as Lady Garden.
Among totally make up names there's Hugh Jarse and Hugh G. Rection
then again irl noduff I had a client years ago called Michael Hunt, and i never Never called him Mike.
you can imagine asking to tannoy him round the building and a female receptionist announcing "has anyone seen Mike Hunt, ......
I had a Wehne Wang in here the other day.
"weenee"? Hell, that by itself is fairly funny.
Among totally make up names there's Hugh Jarse and Hugh G. Rection...
Phil McGroyne, Phil McCracken, Phil M. Hupp, Iva Biggun...
I've used these and more...
there was a lass in a town in the north east of the County of North Yorkshire called May Balls, no biggie until you find out her full name was May Ophelia Balls.
I tell you what, there's some raw work done at the font, that's for sure.
some parents should have been, if not drowned at birth, then certainly sterilised before they could mistreat their own kids.
... and the two Scottish gays, Ben Doon and Phil McCavity.
And their Irish neighbours Patrick Fitzgerald and Gerald Fitzpatrick.
And not forgetting the Irish President of the USA, Barack O'Bama
"weenee"? Hell, that by itself is fairly funny.
only to the mean girls.
I had a Wehne Wang in here the other day.
what you do in private between consenting adults is your own affair:D
This is probably here. Urasis Dragen.
My favorite fake: Heywood Jablowmee
On NPR there's a reporter who is either Yuki Naguchi or Yukina Gucci. The way they say it, I just can't tell
Has anyone mentioned
Dick Trickle?
Numberwang:
[youtube]qjOZtWZ56lc[/youtube]
That's the stupidest thing I've laughed my ass off at in a long time.
:lol2:
Play it for yourself!Offered without comment.
Jimmy Wang put paid to Dan Evans' hopes of reaching the main draw of the Sony Open in Miami by beating the British No2 6-4, 6-2.
Evans got the better of the world No98 Tim Smyczek on Monday but found Taiwan's Wang too hot to handle in the final round of qualifying.
The Guardian.Judge Stroker
I have a feeling I'd catch at least a weekend's worth of contempt charges...
...But seeing as the signs say 'beef' and 'something angus', I feel safe.
Everyone knows what you call a guy named Richard. Now, imagine his name, as listed in the phone book...
[ATTACH]49567[/ATTACH]
Stiff, Dick
:lol2:
57 most awkward names
[ATTACH]49591[/ATTACH]
This has gotta be fake:
[ATTACH]50746[/ATTACH]
new kid on the water polo team is called Maddie Libbs (Mad Libbs).
Oh that's good. That's hilarious, but with a dose of cool.
The man's name is Guilherme Carbagiale Fuck.
I shit you not.Is Tori Hood funny or no?
Out of South Carolina:
South Carolina police stumble upon massive cache of 7,000 guns
Yeah, yeah, sure, sure...An interesting story...And then there's this gem. The second to last paragraph quotes his next door neighbor:
Neighbor Rusty Fender told the station he’d lived next to Nicholson his whole life and never suspected him of hoarding firearms.
:lol2:
Rusty Fender!?!?! You gotta be shitting me.
Oh, please, please let this happen!
[ATTACH]54090[/ATTACH]
:cool:
That shits all over what I was about to post...
Every now and then I get a fun name on my calls - today was the manager of a yacht club whose surname was Flood.
That shits all over what I was about to post...
Second time in a few weeks I've that phrase...
Some buds and I were at the bar. One of them has a
very long beard. And it's
very red. One of the guys what works in the kitchen of said bar also has a somewhat impressive beard, also red, but nowhere near what my bud has, and not nearly as red.
The guy comes out of the kitchen looking around like he's expecting to see someone he knows, or, like he's looking to kick someone's ass. He spy's my bud and laughs out loud, comes down to where we sit at the end of the bar, and says to my bud:
"A waiter came by and tapped my shoulder and told me there is a guy at the end of the bar that is shitting all over my beard. He was right!"
They talked beard for like ten minutes.
Back in the 9th grade, my Spanish teacher's last name was Klutz.
Cindy Fir married Chuck Berger. It was the Fir-Berger wedding.