Five word movie reviews

Traffic: Three awesome interlocking stories, recommended

What Women Want: Harmless message comedy, somewhat entertaining

The Family Man: Totally predictable, even with Cage

Vertical Limit: Saturday night TV is better

Meet the Parents: I dislike "comedy of errors"

Grinch who stole Xmas: Pleasant enough diversion for matinee

The Grinch: Joanne Worley in Warner cartoon.
You Can Count on Me: Stoner, uptight sis patch relationship.
Hannibal: Soylent Green? Mere junk food!
O Brother, Where art Thou?: Hick Odysseus with golden pipes.

Originally posted by Rogue Winter
The Grinch: Joanne Worley in Warner cartoon.
You Can Count on Me: Stoner, uptight sis patch relationship.
Hannibal: Soylent Green? Mere junk food!
O Brother, Where art Thou?: Hick Odysseus with golden pipes.

Can I do movies I haven't seen, based on the trailers?

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon: Indiana Jones Made In China
Erin Brockovich: Overrated anticapitalist Julia Roberts vehicle
Valentine: Horror finally returns after Scream
Sweet November: Girl cute, premise stupid, BAD

Shall I compare thee to a summer's day? Thou art hazy, soggy, and in need of a strong breeze.

Wasn't the original mean enough to summer? (not to mention self-congratulatory; old Bill was really full of himself)

Can I do movies I haven't seen, based on the trailers?

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon: Indiana Jones Made In China

OK, I take this one back. The characters are actually taken from the same source as Star Wars -- one character actually delivers (almost) Darth Vader's best line, "Come with me and we will rule the galaxy as father and son".

Originally posted by russotto
Can I do movies I haven't seen, based on the trailers?

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon: Indiana Jones Made In China
Erin Brockovich: Overrated anticapitalist Julia Roberts vehicle
Valentine: Horror finally returns after Scream
Sweet November: Girl cute, premise stupid, BAD

[QUOTE]Shall I compare thee to a summer's day? Thou art hazy, soggy, and in need of a strong breeze.

Wasn't the original mean enough to summer? (not to mention self-congratulatory; old Bill was really full of himself)
[/B][/QUOTE]

Actually, the ORIGINAL "Sweet November" with Anthony Newly was, well, sweet. If I were keeping score it would be something like Originals:995 Remakes:5.

X-Men: Turgid Franchise Released In Captivity
Miss Congeniality: Sandra's Less Cute Every Day
What Women Want: Helen Hunt Prevents Awful Movie
Charlie's Angels: Breasts, Hair, Asses, Rinse, Repeat
Basic Instinct: Very Large Piece Of Shit (RIP, Bill Hicks.)

Note: Saw 'em all at the drive-in in San Jose, which ROCKS. Where else can you see first-run mass-market crud for the very low price it deserves, while eating your own food, controlling the volume, and tuning in the other screens if your film gets dull? Simply perfect.

The Sixth Sense - Totally Predictable, Slept Last 3/4

Blair Witch 2: Book of Shadows - Independent Doesn't Always Mean Good

The Cell - Don't Watch While On Acid

Gone In 60 Seconds - "Eleanor". Need I Say More?

"Dick" - "Clueless" meets Watergate: instant fun
"Half Baked" - Average, but deserves cult status

Office Space - Fully Deserves Cult Classic Status

Dogma - Greatest Religion Interpretation Flick Ever

American Beauty - Spacey's Never In Bad Movies

Friday & Next Friday - Greatest Driving Force For Legalization

The Godfather - Sicilian Women Worse Than Guns

~Mike

Had a thought...if we can review a movie in five words, why not a CD, too....here are my contributions

Tantric - Breakdown: Days of the New revisited

Fuel - Something Like Human: Band is money, music unchanging

U2 - All that you can't leave behind: Classic Bono, Edge rocks, buy!

The Pogues - Very Best Of: Irish demigods never disappoint listener

Snoop Doggy Dogg - Last Meal: Flows like days of old.

Ja Rule - Rule 3:36: Nigga fuck money ho nigga

and I'm in the bag

steve

I got a CD review here:

Dave Matthews Band--"Everyday": Dave doesn't make bad CDs

Originally posted by sycamore

Dave Matthews Band--"Everyday": Dave doesn't make bad CDs

Oh good, so I'm not the only one here who absolutely loves Dave (or refers to him as one would an old friend).

Have you heard anything about concert stops in PA? He usually makes two passes around the Pittsburgh area, then heads east (and I make an effort to attend both shows), but I haven't heard anything this year.

Originally posted by alphageek31337
Oh good, so I'm not the only one here who absolutely loves Dave (or refers to him as one would an old friend).

"Under the Table and Dreaming" came out my freshman year of college. I really didn't get into him until "Crash." But the albums are truly brilliant. I wasn't quite blown away with the new one as I was with "Before These Crowded Streets," but it's definitely good. It's growing well on me. I don't buy CDs much anymore, so when I do, I make sure it's a good one.

(Incidentally, I can tell you that the next album I'll be buying is the new Depeche Mode CD, which comes out on May 15th. :-) Also, David Byrne has a new CD which I'll feel compelled to buy.)

Have you heard anything about concert stops in PA? He usually makes two passes around the Pittsburgh area, then heads east (and I make an effort to attend both shows), but I haven't heard anything this year.

They just added a third show here at the E-Centre (6/22, 6/23, and now 6/24) in Camden. No shows out in your neighborhood on this leg. :-( He stops in Hershey in August.

Bridget Jones' Diary: Zellweger great, at any weight.

Dave Matthews/Tim Reynolds -Live at Luther College: magnetic... talented musicians accoustic format

Pogues- best cover of Waltzing Matilda

Chris Isaac-Forever Blue: vocal ecstasy turns women on

Peter Tosh- Captured Live: legalize... no more police brutalization

Neville Brothers- Live on Planet Earth: You missed a great tour

Indigo Girls- Shaming the Sun : strong album insert Seinfeld line ___ ____ ______ ________ _____ ____ ____

Dwight Yoakam- Guitars Cadillacs: what country music sounds like

Blues Traveler- Live from the Fall: No lists without John Popper

Depeche Mode--"Dream On" single: Electronic geniuses quiet it down

Got my tix for the show already...whoohoo!

Spy Kids: Insanely cute. Snuck in after...
Heartbreakers: Scriptless, artless, paceless. Walked out.

Pollock: Harris brave playing drunken bastard.
Female Perversions: Hot bi babes with brains. [on video]
Minbo: Extortioners foiled? Soo desu nee. [on video]

Depeche Mode--Exciter: British electronic pioneers mellow out

Tool--Lateralus: Put together quickly; it shows

Cast Away: Powerful, dramatic, Tom Hanks great.

O Brother, Where Art Thou: Coen Brothers Strike Again, Funny

~Mike