Cellar fantasy football 2018
I've chopped 4 teams this year. The 4 that really didn't pay attention. This means we will have an easier time filling our rosters with quality players.
The teams remaining are in 2 divisions.
Slap & Tickle
Slap:
Helmets... Me
Chasers.. Amanda
Barking Toads. Ute
Goats.. Griff
Tickle:
Capybaras... Clobble
Troop... Zippy
Ruff Riders... Glatt
Forktards... Classicman
Log in, get your rankings set up for the draft on August 26th. Let me know if you need help.
Good luck this year!
So I won't be guaranteed 4 wins, huh?
The commish says I drafted shitty and will go 0-fer this year!
Auto-draft... may not pay off
They say I'll place 5th. Fuck 'em, they don't know what they're talking about.
When will I learn that auto-draft is not my friend?
Troop will SMASH again this Year !!!
You just never know. I got a C- and project 6th place finish. We'll see about that.
Sent from my SM-N950U using Tapatalk
We’ll see what can be done when I get home.
Get your game on folks! Thursday Night Football.
I got the best back in the league who will not play this year. I'm sure his good attitude and suspension history will get him the contract he wants. The championship window is closing fast on the Big Ben era. The defense should be a year smarter and the receivers are ready maybe the Eagles would trade a spare QB to bring a terrible locker-room influence on board?
I was going to suggest that you handcuff with James Connor, but I see you beat me to the tip. Good luck tonight!
Your Stillers sound like they are as sick of his shit as I am of hearing about it. The agent wants him to sit until week 9, and then return for week 10 so the season counts for his free agency. He has 'outperformed' his contract. yeah.
Whether Bell reports or not, some of his teammates are frustrated with the three-time Pro Bowler.
"What do you do? Here's a guy who does't give a damn, I guess so we'll treat it as such. I just hate it came to this," Steelers guard Ramon Foster said, via Pittsburgh Post-Gazette. "He's making seven times what I make twice as much as Al (Villanueva) is making and we're the guys who do it for him."
He's a good player. you can't take that away from him. But the franchise tender is what, $14mil? and it's going to cost him $885k per game he misses. I guess money is not the issue.
He can always fall back on his
cRap career.Money probably started as the issue and it went south from there. There was less guaranteed money in the huge contract he was offered than in his current contract. If he stayed healthy and out of legal trouble $70M seems sufficient. The locker room has turned against him. The linemen have let it be known that Conner knows the playbook much better. The book on Conner is he's a touch slower but a lot smarter. I just wish they'd traded him for a high draft pick when he was worth something.
Update: Nice troll of the Pats by the Eagles last night apparently, I always support trolling the Pats.
Wasn't that beautiful? :D
"It was the same play the Patriots used — the one that Tom dropped." - Lane Johnson
We forgot to talk shit yesterday. We'll do better when everyone is snowed in.
I hear it's bad form to shit-talk after the game, though.
[COLOR="White"][size=9]339.50 points, bitches![/size][/COLOR]
There's still tonight's game. You can still shit talk as long as the dweller who is behind still has a shot at winning.
He has 60-ish points and two guys left to play. I'm gonna go out on a limb and say he does not. No offense, Philly Forktards. Just Keepin' It Real (tm). :)
I hear it's bad form to shit-talk after the game, though.
[COLOR="White"][size=9]339.50 points, bitches![/size][/COLOR]
lol
Griff! I know you're old and can't hear, so I'll yell:
[COLOR=DarkOrange]YOU SHOULD HAVE STARTED DALTON![/COLOR]
* takes the Lords name in vain, loudly, in an empty house*
*grumble grumble*
Goddamn Helmets, picking up DeSean Jackson when I had phone reminders going all morning to keep checking back for the moment free agents became available...
*grumble grumble*
derp. take Keenan Cole .
why the hell are you carrying 2 kickers?
::reminds Amanda to grab Fitzmagic ::
I like having a backup for all the lesser positions so I don't get caught with my pants down on Bye weeks. If they're going to be on the bench, it doesn't matter if they're a 25-point RB or a 7-point kicker, they're still just a placeholder.
Just noticed the "Undroppable Players" link for the first time... what makes a player undroppable?
We don't use that feature. I think the nfl app decides. Premier players like Brady or Julio Jones or Aaron Rodgers.
So the idea is that in real life, if the guy got injured his team can't just replace him because of the PR/contractual nightmares?
I don't know why or how it works. I just know that I disabled it when I set the league up because I thought it was stupid.
Is this where we talk shit? I don't know my team well enough yet to talk shit.
yes it is, now go back to sucking, old man
I choose when and where to suck, it is not my time!
You've got Malcolm Stinkin' Jenkins on your team. That guy is a douche. I hope his asshole is itchy all game today and he steps on a Lego after they lose by 1.
Really Brees?
::kicks shit around the room ::
GAH! I traded my damn kicker and then forgot to put the other guy in the slot. Only missed out on six points, and the Ruff Riders are gonna kick my ass anyway thanks to low-performing QBs, but goddamn. Stupid mistakes irk me.
Your benched QB are doing really well this week. :p
Really Brees?
::kicks shit around the room ::
It was a pleasure doing business with you.
[SIZE="7"]
Next![/SIZE]
Your benched QB are doing really well this week. :p
Oh the irony.
Tough start for you this week. - 12 from your D and 132 points on your bench. Ouch.
Eta: I just realized how loaded your team is. Jesus. You could still win this week.
Forgot to check my team before Thursday. Doing ok. ;)
While I suppose it's technically possible my last WR could put up 82 points on Monday night, common sense says I got my ass handed to me... Good game, Toads!
Ruff Riders, we're on for battle of the undefeated!
I'm number ONE!
...on the waiver wire because I suck so bad. Team replacement ongoing
Ruff Riders, we're on for battle of the undefeated!
I wish you the best. May the best fantasy manager win.
Ha! I autodrafted and made like 2 moves this year. Not doing much managing.
You're short a kicker, looks to be tight.
5.5 minutes left and I need 18 more points out of Rodgers.
Omg. He did... And then clod had the kicker.... Didn't even notice that. Good thing he threw that last pass to Adams.
Phew! 278 to 274.
Ruff Riders crush Goats details at 11.
Omg. He did... And then clod had the kicker.... Didn't even notice that. Good thing he threw that last pass to Adams.
Phew! 278 to 274.
Christ on a cracker.
You ready, glatt? I'm gonna give you your first L.
Let's go Troop!
You've got lineup issues bro.
Slowly the waters around Toad warm...
I like it when these kinds of things happen dep't: Dallas just has to throw one single pass to their new prize WR Amari Cooper and I beat Jim's Helmets...
...even though James will be rooting for Cooper to be great for Dallas in his first game for them.
Pulling a hammy during warmups would be a terrible result for everybody!
I was too busy making that work bench on Sunday morning to notice that Sony was inactive.
Derp
You didn't have any options anyway, it's a bye week for everybody
any given bye week sunday
Welp, me and my 3-6 record are up against the undefeated Ruff Riders this week. This will surely go well.
I'm a little light on quarterbacks this week.
Say what, now? I wasn't even paying attention--how exciting!
Goats come up lame, congrats clod!
ooh.... the plot thickens. this week, it's me vs clod for the 4th playoff slot. only 3 weeks? left I think?
you're goin DOWN, Rodent!
they are rodents, right?
oh! NO. only 2 weeks. and I have to play glatt in week 14. I'm fooked....unless I win, AND Amanda can beat clod for me in wk 14.
they are rodents, right?
Aquatic rodents. You never see 'em coming.
One week left of the regular season. If I lose, which is likely, and Tony wins, which is likely... And clod wins which is 50/50, we will have a 3 way tie for the 4th seed. Dunno who would win the tie breaker.....
He hasn't dropped Kareem Hunt, he's gonna lose
It took 13 weeks but I finally got my team the way I like it.
It took 13 weeks for mine to completely fall apart. Football appears to be a rough game on the body.
Derek Henry was on the bench. Not my bench, thankfully. You mad bro?
Yeah WTF, dude's been wildly unremarkable all year!
I mean I coulda realized that the Jags truly suck and maybe the play at this time of year is against defenses that are tanking it
You might be onto something there...
If... clod wins which is 50/50
I'mma state right here and now that my one remaining wide receiver is gonna score 55 points Monday night, and the Chasers' last DP will score none. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
At least I had Amari, sheesh
Takes away some of the pain when your team loses, but you win your fantasy game.
I've got 60 points on glatt, but I think I'll lose. I hate rooting for the sea hawks, but.... I like rooting against that weirdo ex redskin, Cousins.
when your team loses
That was about as even as we get, I don't call it a loss with that freak finish in OT. Sad that (hard-working backup CB) Rasul Douglas gets credit for a pass breakup and giving up a TD. Birds remarkable defense showed up at times, even despite practice squad and backup guys filling out the secondary. Something's still wrong with the offense and they rarely show up for more than a single half. Too many guys on the O line are playing hurt. Everything is still slightly off. At least Sproles got a meaningful TD, finally.
Next year will be different
I've got 60 points on glatt, but I think I'll lose. I hate rooting for the sea hawks, but.... I like rooting against that weirdo ex redskin, Cousins.
I pretty much hate the Redskins, and I feel like they kicked Cousins to the curb after all he did for them, so I wish him well in real life, and of course since he's on my team, I wish him well in fantasy too.
It helps that my two remaining players this week are both on the same team, so I can just root for the one team.
Who is your team then, glatt?
Good question. I don't really have one.
That was too close. 259. 60 to 255.00
I am victorious.
Which means we have a rematch next week.
Shit.
Or maybe I'll have the goats. Also shit
Hey, congratulations! See you soon.
Or congratulations see you soon.
It's me vs glatt and Amanda v Griff.
This Amanda game gonna kill me!
This Amanda game gonna kill me!
One quarter to play, and the projected score is Griff 240.3 to Amanda 239.0
Tricky game to root for.
Just like that, it's changed again :
6 minutes left
Wow. What would have been a Brees passing touchdown gets fumbled through the end zone, and Amanda stays in front. With 1:44 left
Game Ovah.
Congrats glatt and Amanda, good game, griff!
Final game spans the last two regular season games, and a champion will be crowned. Good luck to Amanda and glatt.
Gooooo Chasers, boooo ruff riders!
Losers of this round will play for seeding.
Roads vs Capybaras in the jv bracket final
Toads dammit. Auto correct is a twat.
Tricky game to root for.
C'mon, when was the last time you slept with Griff. :lol2:
Ha!
Crazy game. If Brees throws to Kamara or McCaffrey It's meaningless, if Saints D comes up big I'm screwed because Brees doesn't have to throw to keep up if Saints running game works I'm hosed. Thankfully Goats lose so I can root for my Steelers against the Saints next week. Great game Amanda!
Griff,
I'm hearing that Brees will be riding the pine this week.
I dropped a couple qbs for you to grab if you want.
Glatt, Elliott will probably only play 1st quarter.
Verify, and adjust.
Ah thanks. 2nd loser bowl...
Thanks.
Good luck, Chasers.
Goff was pulled early in the last game, I feel like my qb's were too successful this year making the last two weeks a points vacuum. Foles is a nice start for Jim.
We have a new Champion.
Congrats Chasers! That's her second title.
Good year, Glatt!
Good football day today. Eagles are in, Cowboys won... I hope they meet in the championship game.
You have to hope that... otherwise you probably have to play the Saints in New Orleans!
Wow, those quarterbacks were on fire!
Good job, Chasers!
Good year folks, nice win Chasers!
Awesome streak, go Chasers!
Wow 14 losses , and i didnt even try and loose
It's a special talent brother!
Go to the casino and have your wife bet against you. ;)
Wow 14 losses , and i didnt even try and loose
You went defeated.
Every one in again this year?
You should get in on this, Diaphone Jim! When I started I knew nothing about football, and now I still know nothing about football but a lot about fantasy football. It's fun.
I could put you in as Co owner of troop. That sumbich never moves a player all year and it wastes his roster. He always gets the best guys too.
I was a serious football fan for forty years or more.
It no longer holds any allure whatsoever for me.
In the decade-plus I've been in the Cellar league, I literally have not once watched a football game.
I would suggest not being a fan of the game actually helps the winning.
@plthjinx
How boot you ferd?
@plthijinx
I just noticed I missed an i
Looks like another moderately successful season for me again this year. Ruff Riders abide!
I see what you did. Luck.
Grab Stafford, Carr or Darmold
Also Mahomes and Cousins have the same bye week
I might be willing to trade Rivers for a top RB