I apologize...yet again.

John Sellers • Dec 25, 2015 1:55 pm
This time to Gravdigr for suggesting he have coitus with his mom.

Also, it shouldn't matter to me where he posts his video hotlinks.
Gravdigr • Dec 25, 2015 2:18 pm
Your comment is neither forgotten, nor forgiven.

But, your apology is accepted.

Merry Xmas, John.
John Sellers • Dec 25, 2015 11:07 pm
So you accept my apology for a comment that you won't forgive. Seems to me that you don't believe my apology is sincere.
infinite monkey • Dec 26, 2015 12:16 am
John, just accept what is given, if you are really sorry.

Merry Christmas to you. :)
xoxoxoBruce • Dec 26, 2015 1:46 am
John Sellers;949575 wrote:
So you accept my apology for a comment that you won't forgive. Seems to me that you don't believe my apology is sincere.
It doesn't matter if your apology is sincere. When you (meaning any you, not you you) attack, insult, ridicule, someone you do damage, as sure as a physical attack. Often the damage is worse. The majority of people (in real life, less so on the net) will say they forgive you in order to deescalate and keep the peace. But they don't forget, and it doesn't repair the damage. Likely the people who love you really do forgive, but they don't forget either.

I realize your health issues have limited your real life interaction with the general public, and I suspect much of the way you deal with people you learned on the net. In the real world everything you do and say, every interaction with especially strangers, has consequences. Running off at the mouth in a bar, at a ballgame or on the subway, can get you shot, stabbed, pushed under the train, or if you're lucky, just bleeding. Even Leroy Brown met somebody meaner.

The net is different world, a world where you can be an asshole with far less consequences, at least dangerous ones. The result is people are less reluctant to be an asshole, but that doesn't reduce the damage they do. It's easy to say just shut the machine off and that takes care of that, but if it were that simple we wouldn't be reading about all the suicides from online attacks.

There are people who can't, or won't, refrain from assholery online. If you get around the net you run into them. They become a known pariah, unwelcome anywhere, so they spend their online time just fucking with people, stirring as much shit as they can. Like part of the hole in the wall gang who ride into town, shoot up the saloon, rob the bank, and go back to hide in the boonies. That's a fucked up way to live, but the damage they've done leaves them no choice.

I'd suggest you think a little more about consequences before lashing out. Not for my sake, not for the Cellar's sake, for yours.
Gravdigr • Dec 26, 2015 4:07 am
John Sellers;949575 wrote:
So you accept my apology for a comment that you won't forgive. Seems to me that you don't believe my apology is sincere.


I find it unfortunate you feel that way.

Here, have a coop'n:

[ATTACH]54618[/ATTACH]
BigV • Dec 26, 2015 11:55 am
Coop'n


Fuckin Ron White.

"... I had the *right* to remain silent.... But not the *ability.*"
John Sellers • Dec 26, 2015 1:59 pm
infinite monkey;949579 wrote:
John, just accept what is given, if you are really sorry.


I am, but I get the feeling Gd's acceptance of my apology is reluctant. By definition, acceptance of an apology means all is forgiven.

I will only accept what I'm given when I'm satisfied.
John Sellers • Dec 26, 2015 2:09 pm
Gravdigr;949581 wrote:
I find it unfortunate you feel that way.

Here, have a coop'n:

[ATTACH]54618[/ATTACH]


I saved it to my HDD for future unlimited use. :D
sexobon • Dec 26, 2015 2:13 pm
Try suggesting that he have coitus with you so you can be satisfied.

I'll be waiting for my coop'n.
John Sellers • Dec 26, 2015 2:23 pm
sexobon;949616 wrote:
Try suggesting that he have coitus with you so you can be satisfied. #BAZINGA
lumberjim • Dec 26, 2015 2:35 pm
I think it's bad form to omit the link to the offense in question, btw. if you were to have this discussion in the same thread, it might derail that thread, and I get that... but separating the apology from the offense by not linking it makes it rather un-objective and random. Suggesting he have coitus with his mom, could be just that you called him a motherfucker.... or you could have been really nasty and graphic. I'm left to imagine that it must have been closer to the latter, just based on the reaction your apology got from Digr. ... just pointing that out. I really don't care much about the details. I'm sure you simply did what you always do.
xoxoxoBruce • Dec 26, 2015 3:11 pm
lumberjim;949623 wrote:
Suggesting he have coitus with his mom,...
You say that like it's a bad thing. :haha:
John Sellers • Dec 26, 2015 3:19 pm
Coitus = "Gettin' shagged."
anonymous • Dec 26, 2015 3:41 pm
lumberjim;949623 wrote:
I think it's bad form to omit the link to the offense in question, btw. if you were to have this discussion in the same thread, it might derail that thread, and I get that... but separating the apology from the offense by not linking it makes it rather un-objective and random. Suggesting he have coitus with his mom, could be just that you called him a motherfucker.... or you could have been really nasty and graphic. I'm left to imagine that it must have been closer to the latter, just based on the reaction your apology got from Digr. ... just pointing that out. I really don't care much about the details. I'm sure you simply did what you always do.


http://www.cellar.org/showthread.php?p=949043#post949043
Gravdigr • Dec 26, 2015 4:04 pm
John, you told me to go fuck my mother. You told me to fuck my mother.

What should my response have been? I can tell you what my response is to ANYBODY who says that to me in real life, in my presence...They get the shit slapped out of them. Even if I know it's gonna cost me an ass beating, they get the taste slapped outta their mouth.

Now, we aren't in each others' presence, are we? If we were, what could I hope to accomplish to by slapping you out of your chair? Not much. At best, I would be abusing the handicapped, which would not win me praise, nor the adoration of beautiful women. So, there's really not a whole hell of a lot I can do about it, now is there? All I could possibly do is try to let it go, and that's what I tried to do. I even tried to accept your apology, which, I can see, now, is worthless.

I even wasted five seconds of my life wishing your sorry ass a Merry Christmas.

So, you can take your apology, write it down on a piece of 80 grit sandpaper and shove up your ass. I don't give a fuck what you think, what you say, or what you feel. About me, yourself, or anybody else.

Eat a bag of dicks, you mental midget.

I'm done with this, now.
Gravdigr • Dec 26, 2015 4:13 pm
xoxoxoBruce;949629 wrote:
You say that like it's a bad thing. :haha:


Really, Bruce? I'd have thought that sort of thing was beneath you.

I'm just wrong about all kinds of shit lately.

Later.
xoxoxoBruce • Dec 26, 2015 4:38 pm
Whoa Nellie, I was kidding LJ, nothing to do with you and/or Sellers. Have a sarsaparilla and chill, man. Your hackles are up and spooked that any noise is a threat.

Oh, and for the record, nothing is beneath me... ask anyone. :p:
John Sellers • Dec 26, 2015 5:44 pm
@Grave Robber: Yer done? Fine. I'm not.

Gravdigr;949639 wrote:
John, you told me to go fuck my mother. You told me to fuck my mother.

What should my response have been?


You coulda just accepted my apology WITHOUT the "Your comment is neither forgotten, nor forgiven."

Even a "Reluctantly accepted." woulda been acceptable.
sexobon • Dec 26, 2015 6:49 pm
John Sellers;949654 wrote:
You coulda just accepted my apology WITHOUT the "Your comment is neither forgotten, nor forgiven."

He could; but, he doesn't have to. He's the injured party and if he wants to ensure you understand that his acceptance of your apology doesn't constitute forgiveness that's his prerogative.

Here's how many people see the situation:

Is accepting an apology the same as forgiving?

Best Answer: Accepting the apology is not forgiving the behavior. When someone apologizes, they are sorry for a specific offense or for hurting someone. To accept an apology is to accept the person's feelings as being genuine. Forgiveness goes further in that you essentially erase the offense. It's like this apology: "I'm sorry for cheating you." You can accept that they realize they were wrong. Forgiveness is taking them back and letting them move back in. You don't have to do that part.

Gravdigr initially accepted your apology which alone means he thought of it as being sincere and further demonstrated that by wishing you a Merry Christmas. That doesn't mean he's going to forget the injury; or, that he wants to be your friend. He was honest with you and that's the best policy.

Unfortunately, you've made his acceptance of your apology conditional. That has undermined your credibility and caused him to change his mind about your sincerity. You've changed this apology thread so it's no longer about him, the injured party, you've made it about you and now you're blaming the victim.

Why put these apology threads in Home Base instead of Meta. [Rhetorical]
Why should there be more than one apology thread for you? [Rhetorical]
Why are you further antagonizing a dweller you've injured under the guise of an apology? [Rhetorical]
You could have simply replied I understand to his acceptance speech and dropped it which would have been acceptable.

Instead, you're presenting as an attention whoring troll.

Is this your intent? [RSVP]
lumberjim • Dec 26, 2015 6:54 pm
this whole thread smacks of effort
John Sellers • Dec 26, 2015 8:36 pm
sexobon;949658 wrote:
Here's how many people see the situation:

Is accepting an apology the same as forgiving?

Best Answer: Accepting the apology is not forgiving the behavior. When someone apologizes, they are sorry for a specific offense or for hurting someone. To accept an apology is to accept the person's feelings as being genuine. Forgiveness goes further in that you essentially erase the offense. It's like this apology: "I'm sorry for cheating you." You can accept that they realize they were wrong. Forgiveness is taking them back and letting them move back in. You don't have to do that part.


And why would I care how others view this "situation"?
sexobon • Dec 26, 2015 8:39 pm
If your apology wasn't sincere, you wouldn't.
John Sellers • Dec 26, 2015 8:51 pm
sexobon;949668 wrote:
If your apology wasn't sincere, you wouldn't.


I was sincere...'til Gravyboat fucked up his acceptance post.
Clodfobble • Dec 26, 2015 8:56 pm
That's not how an apology works, John.
orthodoc • Dec 26, 2015 9:07 pm
Apology is cheap coin; but to mean anything it must be unconditional. An apology with conditions is no apology at all.
sexobon • Dec 26, 2015 9:13 pm
His acceptance post was within normal limits. You have difficulty accepting other peoples' rationales for what they say and the way they say it. It permeates everything you do here right down your responses to some of my replies in the Word Association thread in which even after I've explained my rationale for an association, you'd still say something like that's a weird response. Everyone else understands that those associations can be highly personalized; but, you can't relate unless others conform to your expectations and that's an issue for you across the forums.

You fucked up the post-acceptance of your apology and your credibility for sincere apology went down the tubes with it. You're using an apology like a Get Out Of Jail Free card in Monopoly. You want others' acceptance to be unconditional. That's not acceptance: that's surrender. That kind of manipulation may work at home; but, it doesn't work here. Your reintegration suffered a heavy blow in this thread and the onus is entirely on you and your narrow views.
classicman • Dec 27, 2015 1:47 pm
Seems like this is yet another of the same tired ending of John Sellers visits to the cellar.
Later. Glad I didn't bother getting sucked into your world.
BigV • Dec 28, 2015 1:15 am
xoxoxoBruce;949646 wrote:
Whoa Nellie, I was kidding LJ, nothing to do with you and/or Sellers. Have a sarsaparilla and chill, man. Your hackles are up and spooked that any noise is a threat.

Oh, and for the record, nothing is beneath me... ask anyone. :p:


orly? huh. I kind a figured you for a Top.
xoxoxoBruce • Dec 28, 2015 2:27 am
I am, I was complaining. :p:
Back to Forum | Back to Top