Need a new Euphamism
When a woman performs fellatio, it's a Blow Job. BJ for short.
the verb becomes a noun.
I'd like a BJ, honey.
now, when a man performs cunnilingus, what's the noun form?
no, problem, dear... and when I'm done, I would like a ________________?
I can't think of a noun that says it. They're all verbs. Find the man in the boat, etc...
So I think we should invent one.
Ok, get to work. make it good....this is for posterity. you could be the inventor of the term. you'd have proof if it catches on, too.
[COLOR=White]
damn... I just thought of it. Snarlin. A Snarlin. I don't know how prevalent that is, though... so think of something new anyway.[/COLOR]
those are both verbs. it wants a noun.
The lady ordered a ________________________.
Pie Eating Contest is probably too long.
It's not like "BJ" is particularly descriptive of the actual act. That term could be reused generically.
Yeah, I've heard women say they got some head. It sounds wrong to me though, since I always equated the "head" part with the head of the schlong, not the performing partner's head, making it an exclusively male term in my mind. I've also heard women say they wanted "oral" or "some oral."
The most obvious parallel to Blow Job would be Tongue Job, I think.
It's not like "BJ" is particularly descriptive of the actual act. That term could be reused generically.
and is.
those are both verbs. it wants a noun.
The lady ordered a ________________________.
blow job
tongue lashing
I dunno. Tongue is important but lips really are too.
I'd prefer a gentle suck-off than a tongue lashing, even when I'm really horny. I can take it rough, but unless it's a quick fumble I'd rather only take it hard and fast from my own fingers.
So no help from me.
My best would be Lip Job.
A Box of Kisses?
Not that kind of box. ...
: Points down:
... that kind of box.
a BK?
[YOUTUBE]JULyx-wZih8[/YOUTUBE]
A Box of Kisses?
Not that kind of box. ...
: Points down:
... that kind of box.
a BK?
wouldn't that be a kiss of boxes?
I dunno. Tongue is important but lips really are too.
I'd prefer a gentle suck-off than a tongue lashing, even when I'm really horny. I can take it rough, but unless it's a quick fumble I'd rather only take it hard and fast from my own fingers.
So no help from me.
My best would be Lip Job.
to each her own.
In your spirit of literality, I don't consider a blow job a job, and technically there's really very little blowing. It's not an inflation tube.
I think what works well is some phrase that each party understands, even if their mutual understanding is something unrelated or random phrase. I've heard "baking cookies" as a euphemism for making whoopee, itself a comic sounding bit of nonsense.
Learning what appeals especially to Twil would be a good place to start to look for more superficially acceptable terms, ones with more specific and zexy occult meanings. Words are fun and sexy talk is a reliable and enjoyable way to stretch, to warmup as you would for any other vigorous [COLOR="Pink"]s[/COLOR]exercise.
kiss of boxes
I hear that's the title of George R. R. Martin's next series of novels.
wouldn't that be a kiss of boxes?
Only if she has more than one. .... or there are two girls. ...
I dunno. Tongue is important but lips really are too. ... My best would be Lip Job.
LJ for short.
My words betray me yet again.
LJ for short.
I'll vote for that!
Always hated the term blowjob. Handjob too come to that. They make it sound like you're being asked to do building site work.
Honestly, I'd rather a guy just asked me to suck his cock than for a blowjob.
Don't know what the female version would be though.
The lady asked for
1. a pussy licking
2. a box munching
3. a box lunch
4. a vaginal oration
5. The Gravdigr Special
6. a lip-to-lip revival
7. a trench cleaning
8. a Kuni Lexus
9. a nom job
10. a trip to the lip(s)
11. a good ole clit lickin'
12. the lickety split
13. some face time
14. the royal taster
15. a lickin' before the dickin'
Um yeah' no' digr.
I guess I didn't put any stress on the concept of this term being non vomit inducing. Really it should be cute, and non sexual sounding on the surface.
A lickety split maybe.... But the rest of those are right out. #7 is out X 11. If you were actually to refer to that holy grail as a trench.... That may be the end of your association with it. And cleaning? Omgbarf.
seafood
right sound, wrong spelling: C-food
(btw, C can be for coochie, or clit, not c*nt, which I find vulgar. unless that works for the two of you)
seafood
only if they don't wash down there... and then surely it would be a non-starter :yelsick:
My preference is 'kiss me high and low'.
I suppose it could be reduced to "give me a 'high and low' "- but that detracts from it somewhat, I feel. Still, whatever works ...
Maybe if we name it after a celebrity like "Gimme a Clit Eastwood." or "Gimme a Clitopatra."
Fairy Bath
Uh...I'm almost positive that fairies don't go there.
Um yeah' no' digr.
[Slowly&suspiciouslywhilelookinatyasideways] I'll bet you've been in a trench or two. [/Slowly&suspiciouslywhilelookinatyasideways]
Fairy Bath
Uh...I'm almost positive that fairies don't go there.
Maybe men of the homosexual preference don't. But real fairies do.
Who do you think cleans the cobwebs?
Cobwebs? [Size=1]Damngirl.[/Size]
If I get down there and I see cobwebs, I'm leaving 'em there, and I'm slowly backing the hell away.
The lady asked for
a muffin-buffin'?
Ladies, is your muff dusty, musty, or just plain rusty? Well, bring it on down to Mr. Digr's Muffin Buffin'. We'll have that muffin slick & shiny lickety split. Remember, that's Mr. Digr's Muffin Buffin...Where we buff that muff 'til you say "Enuff!"
My preference is 'kiss me high and low'.
Ah, the ol' hi-low routine, high and low and all points in between.
:p:
Uh...I'm almost positive that fairies don't go there.
Fairy is a childish euphemism for the muff area in some parts of the UK. maybe elsewhere too.
clitoral (clit-oral)
ETA: If the guy didn't do it well you could call it a clitfobble ... :bolt:
Ah, the ol' hi-low routine, high and low and all points in between.
:p:
Call it a hi-low, all points in between optional (but much preferred).
My preference is 'kiss me high and low'.
I suppose it could be reduced to "give me a 'high and low' "
Amanda says, "A Low Five"
I guess that means I can stop after 5 minutes.! W00t!
Ummm no...theres no stopping after five...i'll leave it at that.
I do like the low five. But how do you say that in front of the kids w/o sounding fishy?
Hi everyone! I finally joined!
Yo! Hallo there Amanda, nice to meetcha!
Howdy Amanda! We'll assume Jim already administered the quiz in person.
Ooh, how about that one: administer the quiz.
"You're going to get quizzed later tonight."
"What's with the quizzical look on your face?"
"You can be my proctor any day, baby."
I do like the low five. But how do you say that in front of the kids w/o sounding fishy?
Hey Hugnkiss, good to hear from you.
'Fraid to say requesting cunnilingus in front of the children is always going to be awkward. Then again, if you are planning in advance you could always put a note on the fridge/ calendar to book Tasi Night. If you're being specially spoiled you might even want to include your favourite food; like Steak and a Blow-Job night. Pizza and Tasi.
Great to see you here Amanda!
Hi everyone! I finally joined!
Cool! Welcome.
We say "Taking myself/ourselves out to dinner". It's socially acceptable unless they ask what we ate. hahahah
Ummm no...theres no stopping after five...i'll leave it at that.
I do like the low five. But how do you say that in front of the kids w/o sounding fishy?
Hi everyone! I finally joined!
Welcome Amanda!!
Hi everyone! I finally joined!
:welcome: to the Cellar, Amanda!
Hey, Amanda!
---
"administer the quiz" chortle
Hi Amanda. Do you want to pet my panda?
isn't that a song by the Beach Boys?
isn't that a song by the Beach Boys?
this?
"pet"
or this, "rhonda"?
[YOUTUBE]4Te_lCF69Aw[/YOUTUBE]
Howdy Amanda! We'll assume Jim already administered the quiz in person.
Ooh, how about that one: administer the quiz.
"You're going to get quizzed later tonight."
"What's with the quizzical look on your face?"
"You can be my proctor any day, baby."
Invigilator has a suggestive ring to it. Especially if, when administering the quim quiz, one was the invagilator invigilator.
How about The Spanish Inquisition?
Nobody expects The Spanish Inquisition...
...sincerely, The Grand Inquisitor.
(Flyp for short ...Flyp me off, honey....) ?
:rar: