Let's play What If!!

What if they had the internet in the 1st century church.. what would it be like?? what would people say?? and how would they say it??

First up, the Gospels as we know them would be completely different. There were scads of other documents which were excluded from the official version. Imagine the Wikigospels!

yea that would be interesting..

ZenGum;837148 wrote:

First up, the Gospels as we know them would be completely different. There were scads of other documents which were excluded from the official version. Imagine the Wikigospels!

Which might mean that the near total erasure of women from the history of the early Christian movement wouldn't have happened.

Jesus' siblings would've started splinter groups, but the movement may have kept its core ideas. Mary would have been revered as a living breathing woman... what Dana said.

JBKlyde;837146 wrote:

What if they had the internet in the 1st century church.. what would it be like?? what would people say?? and how would they say it??

thou arst an fucktardeth

yea, I be not regretful o'er thoust digit

verily, might I haz yon cheeseburgureth?

thou cockest!

...and things of this nature.

What would first century Godwin's Law look like?

Name the 12 Disciples, starting with...

Konrad Zeus
John Bachus
Steve Jobimus
Bill Gateus
Larry Pageum

What would first century Godwin's Law look like?

As ye speake of Rome, thus ye wurd of argumente is lost.

Some Judas would release the Jesus - Mary Magdalene sex videos.

Sexobon ftw.

Holy Fuck! :eek:

DanaC;837158 wrote:

Which might mean that the near total erasure of women from the history of the early Christian movement wouldn't have happened.

You mean it DIDN'T happen?

They erased us or made us into whores.

those crazy Christians! ha ha ha :right:

or made us into whores.

Only if you took the money. :p:

I think they would throw parties like this "love fest @ the way"

Could Jesus have tweeted his sermons?

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http://www.smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=2782#comic

That's brilliant.

ZenGum;837287 wrote:

Could Jesus have tweeted his sermons?

Jesus could have even started his own social networking sites like Turntheothercheekbook and HisGrace.

Or started his own religion. ;)

And called it "Three's Company." :mg:

I was thinking about how they would use words? "In the beginning was the word but the darkness did not understand it".. would we have a higher understanding of the English language or would everybody speak Hebrew...

I want to see l337 speak in Aramaic.

Stoppe ye camping, noobe!

Dose anyone want ELSE want to start getting in to the Spirit of Christmas or should we just write this off as Mud Day??

Christmas is coming the goose is getting fat, please do put a penny in the old mans hat if you haven't got a penny a hay penny will do If you haven't got a hay penny then God bless you.

I think the spirit of Christmas is rum 'cause that's what they put in the eggnog.

Chest nuts roasting on an open fire..

and how would this statement be received?? "And then they will know that I am there God". I am not God I don't have the right. If your looking for love the futures out of sight and I just called to say I love you??

aND THATS JUST EYE CANDY.

My God has correct grammar and spelling. ;) :p:

Sure, but it's all Aramaic, so how would you know?

and someone who is un-spiritual.. TA DA like me was looking into a mirror and imedeately forgetting what I looked like and that's were vanity and insanity come in.... I think I got the insanity in check my sometimes I just get too happy and my head starts spinning with reavalations that are not necessarily funny...

ZenGum;837287 wrote:

Could Jesus have tweeted his sermons?

Well, He is on Twitter, actually (https://twitter.com/JESUS), and so is His dad (https://twitter.com/GOD). :cool:

Not to mention their earthly advance man, @pontifex.

what if there were no possessions....and no countries, to...

Nothing to kill or die for??

Are you mad???

You may not, in point of fact, say I'm a dreamer.

I was only resting my eyes.

And you're not the only one.

Ah, but can you imagine a world in which there are no hypothetical situations?

yes, of course

see: The Invention of Lying

ZenGum;844078 wrote:

Ah, but can you imagine a world in which there are no hypothetical situations?

:D Excellent !

Worthy of, but too long for, a bumper sticker

ZenGum;844078 wrote:

Ah, but can you imagine a world in which there are no hypothetical situations?

That is the same world where there is no other word for Thesaurus.

Like synonymograph?

wow this thread has merrit...

What if we played a game of "What If?" I wonder what thread post #45 would look like.

sexobon;844228 wrote:

What if we played a game of "What If?" I wonder what thread post #45 would look like.

Hey, wait a minute.

sexobon;844228 wrote:

sexobon wrote:

What if we played a game of "What If?" I wonder what thread post #45 would look like.

Hey, wait a minute.

NOW CUT THAT OUT!

sexobon;844228 wrote:

sexobon wrote:

[QUOTE=sexobon;844228]What if we played a game of "What If?" I wonder what thread post #45 would look like.

Hey, wait a minute.

NOW CUT THAT OUT!.[/QUOTE]
Now listen you ... me. Stop it, just stop it. We're caught in an editing vortex and one of me ... us has got to stop.

sexobon;844228 wrote:

sexobon wrote:

[QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228]What if we played a game of "What If?" I wonder what thread post #45 would look like.

Hey, wait a minute.

NOW CUT THAT OUT!.[/QUOTE]
Now listen you ... me. Stop it, just stop it. We're caught in an editing vortex and one of me ... us has got to stop.[/QUOTE]
WHAT IF we ... I just keep going until the editing time elapses and the vortex closes; or, until someone else makes post #46?

sexobon;844228 wrote:

sexobon wrote:

[QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228]What if we played a game of "What If?" I wonder what thread post #45 would look like.

Hey, wait a minute.

NOW CUT THAT OUT!.[/QUOTE]
Now listen you ... me. Stop it, just stop it. We're caught in an editing vortex and one of me ... us has got to stop.[/QUOTE]
WHAT IF we ... I just keep going until the editing time elapses and the vortex closes; or, until someone else makes post #46?.[/QUOTE]
Brilliant! Sounds like something the Doctor would come up with.

sexobon;844228 wrote:

sexobon wrote:

[QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228]What if we played a game of "What If?" I wonder what thread post #45 would look like.

Hey, wait a minute.

NOW CUT THAT OUT!.[/QUOTE]
Now listen you ... me. Stop it, just stop it. We're caught in an editing vortex and one of me ... us has got to stop.[/QUOTE]
WHAT IF we ... I just keep going until the editing time elapses and the vortex closes; or, until someone else makes post #46?.[/QUOTE]
Brilliant! Sounds like something the Doctor would come up with.[/QUOTE]
Yeah, if there were two of him! Great mind[s] ...

sexobon;844228 wrote:

sexobon wrote:

[QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228]What if we played a game of "What If?" I wonder what thread post #45 would look like.

Hey, wait a minute.

NOW CUT THAT OUT!.[/QUOTE]
Now listen you ... me. Stop it, just stop it. We're caught in an editing vortex and one of me ... us has got to stop.[/QUOTE]
WHAT IF we ... I just keep going until the editing time elapses and the vortex closes; or, until someone else makes post #46?.[/QUOTE]
Brilliant! Sounds like something the Doctor would come up with.[/QUOTE]
Yeah, if there were two of him! Great mind[s] ...[/QUOTE]
Looks like me and I are in this for the duration. I don't see anybody else posting.

sexobon;844228 wrote:

sexobon wrote:

[QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228]What if we played a game of "What If?" I wonder what thread post #45 would look like.

Hey, wait a minute.

NOW CUT THAT OUT!.[/QUOTE]
Now listen you ... me. Stop it, just stop it. We're caught in an editing vortex and one of me ... us has got to stop.[/QUOTE]
WHAT IF we ... I just keep going until the editing time elapses and the vortex closes; or, until someone else makes post #46?.[/QUOTE]
Brilliant! Sounds like something the Doctor would come up with.[/QUOTE]
Yeah, if there were two of him! Great mind[s] ...[/QUOTE]
Looks like me and I are in this for the duration. I don't see anybody else posting.[/QUOTE]
We're ... I'm just going to have to ride it out. I call shotgun!

sexobon;844228 wrote:

sexobon wrote:

[QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228]What if we played a game of "What If?" I wonder what thread post #45 would look like.

Hey, wait a minute.

NOW CUT THAT OUT!.[/QUOTE]
Now listen you ... me. Stop it, just stop it. We're caught in an editing vortex and one of me ... us has got to stop.[/QUOTE]
WHAT IF we ... I just keep going until the editing time elapses and the vortex closes; or, until someone else makes post #46?.[/QUOTE]
Brilliant! Sounds like something the Doctor would come up with.[/QUOTE]
Yeah, if there were two of him! Great mind[s] ...[/QUOTE]
Looks like me and I are in this for the duration. I don't see anybody else posting.[/QUOTE]
We're ... I'm just going to have to ride it out. I call shotgun![/QUOTE]
You rode shotgun last time, it's your turn to drive. When we exit the What If editing vortex, don't forget to release the brakes. The post makes a weird sound when we don't.

sexobon;844228 wrote:

sexobon wrote:

[QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228]What if we played a game of "What If?" I wonder what thread post #45 would look like.

Hey, wait a minute.

NOW CUT THAT OUT!.[/QUOTE]
Now listen you ... me. Stop it, just stop it. We're caught in an editing vortex and one of me ... us has got to stop.[/QUOTE]
WHAT IF we ... I just keep going until the editing time elapses and the vortex closes; or, until someone else makes post #46?.[/QUOTE]
Brilliant! Sounds like something the Doctor would come up with.[/QUOTE]
Yeah, if there were two of him! Great mind[s] ...[/QUOTE]
Looks like me and I are in this for the duration. I don't see anybody else posting.[/QUOTE]
We're ... I'm just going to have to ride it out. I call shotgun![/QUOTE]
You rode shotgun last time, it's your turn to drive. When we exit the What If editing vortex, don't forget to release the brakes. The post makes a weird sound when we don't.[/QUOTE]
I like that sound. Noisy posts are cool.

sexobon;844228 wrote:

sexobon wrote:

[QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228][QUOTE=sexobon;844228]What if we played a game of "What If?" I wonder what thread post #45 would look like.

Hey, wait a minute.

NOW CUT THAT OUT!.[/QUOTE]
Now listen you ... me. Stop it, just stop it. We're caught in an editing vortex and one of me ... us has got to stop.[/QUOTE]
WHAT IF we ... I just keep going until the editing time elapses and the vortex closes; or, until someone else makes post #46?.[/QUOTE]
Brilliant! Sounds like something the Doctor would come up with.[/QUOTE]
Yeah, if there were two of him! Great mind[s] ...[/QUOTE]
Looks like me and I are in this for the duration. I don't see anybody else posting.[/QUOTE]
We're ... I'm just going to have to ride it out. I call shotgun![/QUOTE]
You rode shotgun last time, it's your turn to drive. When we exit the What If editing vortex, don't forget to release the brakes. The post makes a weird sound when we don't.[/QUOTE]
I like that sound. Noisy posts are cool.[/QUOTE]
Shame there are no posting sounds in the Cellar, only in What If editing vortices which are rare.

Free at last, free at last. Thank the editing timer, I'm free at last. You wouldn't believe where I was stuck for the last couple of hours. At least I made a quiet return. It could have gotten quite noisy if I had come out on the other side of the vortex.

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Recursion: It's what's for dinner.

*wild applause*

Sexobon, that was fucking brilliant.

if a time machine broke on new-years eve dose that mean it's the year 1999 forever?? If time travel were indeed possible it would have something to do with movies and music.. something to the effect of what Big V referred to as photo journalism.. and a-lot of spiked egg nog...

What if I put a treadmill on my roof so Santa with his sleigh and eight tiny reindeer land on it? Will they be able to take off again; or, will I hit the jackpot?!

The reindeer on a treadmill question was discussed here; it seems they can take off if magic dust is involved.

Fortunately, this has been scientifically examined, as discussed here.
Turns out the magic dust is cocaine. Who'd have guessed?

The correct answer is that not only will they be able to take off; also, ZenGum will get a used treadmill for Christmas.

Thieving reindeer!

that's not funny, zen gum...

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Even if it's been seen before it's worth repeating:

Oh I love that!

Well, it started off at the supermarket and went downhill from there....

have a cuppa.

ZenGum;837148 wrote:

First up, the Gospels as we know them would be completely different. There were scads of other documents which were excluded from the official version. Imagine the Wikigospels!

Imagine the Director's Cut, the outtakes, the bloopers reel, the director's commentary audio track, etc. etc.

Not to mention The Gospels, parts II, III and IV. What a franchise!

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I'm not good at this game, but it lead me to this.

My son has that, and also the followup, "Thing Explainer." It's one of his favorites.

What if plants are actually farming us, giving us oxygen until we die, are buried, and decompose, so they can consume us?

Like this?

Or

This?

well played

Never before have the words "corn sex" occurred in my mind, without the word "hole" figuring in.

What if, instead of being an actor and all-around bad-ass, John Wayne had become President of the United States? What would he be remembered for?

What if, instead of being a stupid-rich business dude and President of the United States, Donald Trump had a successful rock band? What would his band's name have been? Donald Trump and The ---? What was their biggest hit? Remember, he didn't go into politics.

Hello, I'm Marion M Morrison and I'm running for president.



[FONT="Arial Black"][SIZE="5"]DONALD TRUMP[/SIZE][/FONT] and some guys.

[FONT="Arial Black"][SIZE="5"]DONALD TRUMP[/SIZE][/FONT] Grabbed her pussy and broke her heart.

Donald and the Strumpettes

Featuring their new hit single - Loophole Love

Available on the Mar-a-Lago label.

He would never have gotten the hair plugs, he'd just wear a bandana to cover the balding like Axl Rose.

Question during a Q & A in the early 70s at some university w/John Wayne:


Q: Is your hair real?

John Wayne's Answer: It's real. It's not mine, but it's real.

Gravdigr;986897 wrote:

What if, instead of being an actor and all-around bad-ass, John Wayne had become President of the United States? What would he be remembered for? ...

Cowboy diplomacy.

:D

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BigV;978982 wrote:

Like this?

Or

This?

Now I want Corn, with Miracle Whip and Pico Pica. Steamed for 35 minutes cooked but still crunchy.