Life's Lessons

Big Sarge • Oct 22, 2012 9:54 am
Always wear clothes when jump starting a car:right:
Spexxvet • Oct 22, 2012 10:54 am
The wet bird never flies at night.
Undertoad • Oct 22, 2012 11:58 am
^ what the

In Philly they will ticket you for being parked and not having an up-to-date inspection sticker. Fuckers
Big Sarge • Oct 22, 2012 3:43 pm
^ A old primary saying derrived from biblical scripture referring to the cosmic unbalance experienced by both humans and birds in an aura of wetness. The shared self interprentence is lost by the swelling darkness of night, and an uncontrolable urge of wisdom not to fly till dawn arrives.
infinite monkey • Oct 22, 2012 3:45 pm
pssssst...the blue dog flies at midnight.
Spexxvet • Oct 22, 2012 3:47 pm
Spexxvet;835243 wrote:
The wet bird never flies at night.


From a Jackie Vernon comedy routine.
Big Sarge • Oct 22, 2012 4:11 pm
Big Sarge;835221 wrote:
Always wear clothes when jump starting a car:right:


based upon what i observed when a wet person lets the jumper cables hit their leg
Gravdigr • Oct 22, 2012 5:57 pm
The hungry rabbit jumps.
toranokaze • Oct 23, 2012 8:35 pm
Don't poke the bear
Griff • Oct 23, 2012 9:37 pm
Your gut told you the truth 2 months ago.
infinite monkey • Oct 23, 2012 10:31 pm
Don't sleep in the subway.
BigV • Oct 24, 2012 12:01 am
when exerting force on a wrench, imagine where your knuckles will be a tenth of a second after the bolt wrings off.

protip--do this before the bolt wrings off.
ZenGum • Oct 24, 2012 12:20 am
Never bang the wrench with a hammer.

Get a longer wrench. Get a big long tube and slide it over the end of the wrench to extend the leverage.

No sudden jolts. Steady, even force is what does the job.
BigV • Oct 24, 2012 12:37 am
ZenGum;835460 wrote:
Never bang the wrench with a hammer.

Get a longer wrench. Get a big long tube and slide it over the end of the wrench to extend the leverage.

cheater.

ZenGum;835460 wrote:
No sudden jolts. Steady, even force is what does the job.
spoken like a true impact wrench virgin.

:p:
xoxoxoBruce • Oct 24, 2012 1:02 am
Impact is more effective and safer than more strain.
Juniper • Oct 24, 2012 1:45 am
Um . . . don't fry bacon when you're naked?
glatt • Oct 24, 2012 8:49 am
Impact can mess up the ratcheting mechanism in the wrench. But it's OK. Just smack the wrench from a few different angles and it will loosen up and turn again.
xoxoxoBruce • Oct 24, 2012 11:46 am
If it has a ratcheting mechanism it's not a wrench, it's some kind of ratchet.:p:
ZenGum • Oct 24, 2012 6:59 pm
Never use the ratchet drive as a hammer. Unless you like buying new ratchet drives.
BigV • Oct 24, 2012 7:00 pm
Or are out of hammers
ZenGum • Oct 24, 2012 7:09 pm
Better to buy a hammer. They're cheaper than ratchet drives.
BigV • Oct 24, 2012 7:11 pm
and rocks are cheaper than hammers... Sometimes you have to go to war with the ratchet you have instead of the ratchet you wish you had.
glatt • Oct 25, 2012 8:38 am
If the only tool you have is a hammer, everything begins to resemble a nail.
ZenGum • Oct 25, 2012 8:53 am
Didn't someone here say something about not shoving things up your ass unless they have a part that is too wide to go in?
Undertoad • Oct 25, 2012 9:26 am
I did and I called it a rule of thumb


and nobody got it
jimhelm • Oct 25, 2012 10:33 am
how do you know no one got it?
Undertoad • Oct 25, 2012 10:36 am
nobody said LOL
infinite monkey • Oct 25, 2012 10:38 am
I almost did a LOL part deux smilie.
jimhelm • Oct 25, 2012 10:57 am
I can't find the post. if you could link it, I'll rectify the situation
infinite monkey • Oct 25, 2012 11:08 am
You made thumbody get a heart on.
BigV • Oct 25, 2012 11:38 am
Undertoad;835688 wrote:
I did and I called it a rule of thumb


and nobody got it

lots of people got it, many commented with similarly droll humor.

Undertoad;835702 wrote:
nobody said LOL

JuancoRocks did actually "lol" but he was speaking smiley when he did it.
jimhelm;835704 wrote:
I can't find the post. if you could link it, I'll rectify the situation


Here ya go:

Undertoad;742518 wrote:
Never put anything in your butt that doesn't have a base, or at least some sector of it that won't fit.




a recent q&a with an emergency room doc reminds us of this important rule of thumb. so to speak.

and you were quoted by:
BigV;742522 wrote:
like shoulders?

and
GunMaster357;742654 wrote:
That might be tough for some people. Their whole person being an asshole.

and
SteveDallas;746650 wrote:
(cough)

and
JuancoRocks;746653 wrote:
Undertoad .......rule of thumb.......



:lol:

.


and this was the post that launched a [strike]thousand[/strike] dozen or so replies
anonymous;742458 wrote:
Now where did I leave those keys.....--snip--
Undertoad • Oct 25, 2012 3:03 pm
people just don't like me or my sense of humor
Big Sarge • Oct 25, 2012 3:09 pm
Don't fret. It's not your humor. It's a personal thing
infinite monkey • Oct 25, 2012 3:18 pm
infinite monkey;835705 wrote:
You made thumbody get a heart on.




Undertoad;835724 wrote:
people just don't like me or my sense of humor


I feel your pain. I got orphaned on this.
jimhelm • Oct 25, 2012 3:50 pm
Undertoad;835724 wrote:
people just don't like me or my sense of humor


I think its more your beady eyes and evil aura.
infinite monkey • Oct 25, 2012 3:55 pm
Who? Me or UT? I'll admit to the evil aura but me eyes ain't beady.:rollanim:

They are crazy, though. Yes, I have Crazy Eyes®
Big Sarge • Oct 25, 2012 5:24 pm
They scare me!!!! But, most of the women of the cellar scare me too.
jimhelm • Oct 25, 2012 5:26 pm
infinite monkey;835733 wrote:
Who? Me or UT? I'll admit to the evil aura but me eyes ain't beady.:rollanim:

They are crazy, though. Yes, I have Crazy Eyes®


UT of course. that's why I quoted his post...

you though? we're just out to get you. thats all.
infinite monkey • Oct 25, 2012 6:15 pm
Oh i know. I was just messin'

:)