Ima Die Now, Right?

Gravdigr • Sep 4, 2012 5:24 pm
I just swallowed a big green housefly.

GACK!

Ima die now ain't I?

It was flyin around my monitor, I went for a half-hearted swat, made contact, and couldn't find it. I figured it flew along on it's merry way.

Then, a minute or two ago, I took another swig out of the glass on the desk (wtf, it's 5:00 somewhere, right?), and there was...how to describe it...a lump. A lump went cascading over my tongue. And down my throat.

I'd make myself throw up, but, throwing up makes me sick.

And now I keep hearing a tiny voice, deep down inside, saying [SIZE="1"]"Help mee. Help meeee!"[/SIZE]

That's my conscience, right? Please tell me it's my conscience.
limey • Sep 4, 2012 5:43 pm
Ew. Gack. Just ew!


Sent by thought transference
Rhianne • Sep 4, 2012 5:53 pm
Quick Grav, you need to swallow a spider to catch it!
glatt • Sep 4, 2012 6:05 pm
It's true. Not shitting you. Find a spider. STAT.
Lamplighter • Sep 4, 2012 6:38 pm
So long as there's no hook
- connected to a line
-- connected to a rod
--- connected to a fisherman,

you'll be fine.
Undertoad • Sep 4, 2012 6:42 pm
Whiskey will make certain the bacteria in the bug are gone but you must drink lots of it immediately.
jimhelm • Sep 4, 2012 7:11 pm
glatt;828348 wrote:
It's true. Not shitting you. Find a spider. STAT.


and then swallow a bird!
Razzmatazz13 • Sep 4, 2012 8:45 pm
Swallow a cat to catch the bird!
John Sellers • Sep 4, 2012 9:32 pm
To add a UT's answer, if it ends up in your stomach, your stomach acid will kill it.
ZenGum • Sep 4, 2012 11:53 pm
Spray a big squirt of fly spray into your mouth, just to be safe.
sexobon • Sep 5, 2012 12:13 am
Gravdigr;828342 wrote:
... I took another swig out of the glass on the desk (wtf, it's 5:00 somewhere, right?), and there was...how to describe it...a lump. A lump went cascading over my tongue. And down my throat. ...

So, the drink gave you a buzz. :D
John Sellers • Sep 5, 2012 2:11 am
Seems me and UT were the only two serious about helping Gravdigr.
monster • Sep 5, 2012 8:34 am
Please please please tell me that was an attempt at humor, JS
Clodfobble • Sep 5, 2012 8:36 am
It's only because we all quietly know that Grav's a dead man walking. Nothing you can do but be cheery, at that point. Don't let him know what's coming.
Razzmatazz13 • Sep 5, 2012 8:45 am
Clodfobble;828439 wrote:
It's only because we all quietly know that Grav's a dead man walking. Nothing you can do but be cheery, at that point. Don't let him know what's coming.


Yeah seriously, JS... I mean don't rub it in for the poor guy. Just make him as comfortable as possible... :comfort:
infinite monkey • Sep 5, 2012 9:31 am
John Sellers;828420 wrote:
Seems me and UT were the only two serious about helping Gravdigr.


You're such a knob. :lol:
BrianR • Sep 5, 2012 12:04 pm
Rhianne for the win! The perfect answer!
Gravdigr • Sep 5, 2012 1:07 pm
Undertoad;828355 wrote:
Whiskey will make certain the bacteria in the bug are gone but you must drink lots of it immediately.


If that's true then he was clean as soon as when he went in.

Caffeine-free Pepsi and Bird Dog Blackberry-flavored whiskey, 50/50.

:yum:
John Sellers • Sep 5, 2012 3:03 pm
monster;828436 wrote:
Please please please tell me that was an attempt at humor, JS


Negatatory...no :D. I don't think a swallowed insect is something to laugh at.

Clodfobble;828439 wrote:
It's only because we all quietly know that Grav's a dead man walking. Nothing you can do but be cheery, at that point. Don't let him know what's coming.


Then obviously you know something I don't.

infinite monkey;828463 wrote:
You're such a knob. :lol:


Why can't I be an asshole? Like ya'll. :D

Gravdigr;828525 wrote:
If that's true then he was clean as soon as when he went in.

Caffeine-free Pepsi and Bird Dog Blackberry-flavored whiskey, 50/50.

:yum:


Also, the thing about yer stomach acid killing it is also true. I do my research.
Rhianne • Sep 5, 2012 5:17 pm
I disagree. Accidentally swallowing insects is always funny.
infinite monkey • Sep 5, 2012 5:23 pm
If you don't walk around with your mouth gaping open like some mouth-breather you rarely eat bugs.
Gravdigr • Sep 5, 2012 5:36 pm
Hey!

I'm right here!
infinite monkey • Sep 5, 2012 5:51 pm
Since you haven't 'researched' the proper methods for mouth bug treatment I assumed it was just a fluke thing for you, grav...you're no mouth-breather.
BigV • Sep 5, 2012 7:41 pm
Gravdigr;828525 wrote:
If that's true then he was clean as soon as when he went in.

Caffeine-free Pepsi and Bird Dog Blackberry-flavored whiskey, 50/50.

:yum:


yum?

I'd rather have the housefly. bleurgh.
Aliantha • Sep 5, 2012 7:49 pm
Yeah, that sounds like a substitute for cough medicine if I ever heard of one. lol Yuck. Blackberry whiskey? Just yucky. lol
Spexxvet • Sep 5, 2012 7:49 pm
Nothing wrong with a little bug protein now and then. I'm sure there's some in your morning wheaties. And the green looks like vegetables.
monster • Sep 5, 2012 8:02 pm
Flavored Whiskey. No wonder you didn't want to "re-enjoy" it.
xoxoxoBruce • Sep 6, 2012 5:29 am
.
Gravdigr • Sep 7, 2012 3:11 pm
Oh, Bird Dog Blackberry is good stuff. No kidding. Very smooth. Just the subtlest hint of blackberry. Made just up the road, too.

[ATTACH]40550[/ATTACH]

Around $20 a fifth.
monster • Sep 7, 2012 4:17 pm
you was robbed :lol:
monster • Sep 7, 2012 4:22 pm
FIFY

[ATTACH]40560[/ATTACH]
BigV • Sep 7, 2012 5:58 pm
LOL
Gravdigr • Sep 8, 2012 5:10 pm
Change the name to Bird Dog Crunchy and I'm in.
monster • Sep 8, 2012 5:13 pm
How about "Fly Dog"
Razzmatazz13 • Sep 8, 2012 6:34 pm
That's so fly, dawwg!