Please insult me

Undertoad • Jun 24, 2012 12:56 pm
I am wrong and deeply flawed to my core. Please insult me, and attempt to hurt me. Hold nothing back, and be as personal as you can possibly be about it. Humiliate me if possible. Say that one thing you wanted to say about me but never did. Attempt to find my worst flaw.
infinite monkey • Jun 24, 2012 12:59 pm
You're icky? ;)
orthodoc • Jun 24, 2012 1:18 pm
You're too intelligent for your own good. That makes you a cunt, doesn't it? Or are you a cunt only if you disagree with me? I can never keep these things straight.
Clodfobble • Jun 24, 2012 2:45 pm
I'm pretty sure you have a speech impediment.
DanaC • Jun 24, 2012 2:50 pm
orthodoc;816701 wrote:
You're too intelligent for your own good. That makes you a cunt, doesn't it? Or are you a cunt only if you disagree with me? I can never keep these things straight.


It's if you are too clever by half, AND you disagree with me. One or the other just makes you a dick.
Rhianne • Jun 24, 2012 2:55 pm
I've tried and tried to think but i can't come up with anything that might hurt you. You're better than me.
Sundae • Jun 24, 2012 3:30 pm
Things get caught in your beard and moustache.
I hate the idea you kissed female rellies with that facial hair, especially Kat.
footfootfoot • Jun 24, 2012 3:59 pm
You have the spinach of life stuck in your teeth.
regular.joe • Jun 24, 2012 4:26 pm
You did not punctuate properly in the title for this thread.
classicman • Jun 24, 2012 4:32 pm
No.
sexobon • Jun 24, 2012 4:41 pm
Not until you say pretty please.
classicman • Jun 24, 2012 4:44 pm
{{confused}} [COLOR="LemonChiffon"]
Still not sure if this is a joke or if something happened...[/COLOR]
JBKlyde • Jun 24, 2012 5:11 pm
I think that if he is "trying" to be insulted and that's his wish the best thing to do is to push his butttons is to love him all the more. Undertoad your a beautiful creation of God and I hope he blesses you to the point where you no longer feel the need to be insulted. Your Amazingly smart and intelligent.
Undertoad • Jun 24, 2012 5:40 pm
Thank you all! And more please!
infinite monkey • Jun 24, 2012 6:00 pm
That one eyebrow hair just pisses me off. It's standing up all defiant like it owns the damn place.
sexobon • Jun 24, 2012 6:16 pm
You're a Politics thread dropout! Oh wait ... that may demonstrate superior intellect. Dang, I thought I had a good one there for a moment.
Gravdigr • Jun 24, 2012 6:26 pm
You have pudgy hands, and they smell of cabbage.
elSicomoro • Jun 24, 2012 9:27 pm
You're retarded Tony...that's about all I got there.
John Sellers • Jun 24, 2012 10:56 pm
[British accent]Bloody well bugger off, you sodding wanker![/British accent]
xoxoxoBruce • Jun 24, 2012 11:26 pm
A disappointment to your country, your mother and your dog.
sexobon • Jun 25, 2012 12:38 am
OK Undertoad, the gloves are off, no more fooling around. :eyebrow:

You asked for it, you got it. :rar:

Better be sitting down and maybe have someone standing by just in case this is too much for you to handle. :bawling:

Here it comes, are you reeeeeeeeeadyyyyyyyyyyyyy? :mg:


[center]:shocking: That UT, she's a swell gal. :shocking:[/center]
ZenGum • Jun 25, 2012 4:52 am
Your political views lean somewhat further to the right than you are able to consistently defend.
DanaC • Jun 25, 2012 7:05 am
ZenGum;816813 wrote:
Your political views lean somewhat further to the right than you are able to consistently defend.


ooof.

John R. Sellers;816790 wrote:
[British accent]Bloody well bugger off, you sodding wanker![/British accent]


Not a bad Brit accent there, old boy. Need to cut off the words 'bugger' and 'wanker' a bit. You Americans always pronounce your 'rrrrrrrs' more than us. We pretty much slip em by unnoticed.
DanaC • Jun 25, 2012 7:05 am
xoxoxoBruce;816797 wrote:
A disappointment to your country, your mother and your dog.


Fucking awesome. I'm gonna remember that and find an oportunity to use it in my life.
Undertoad • Jun 25, 2012 10:07 am
Now I'm feelin' it! Do worse!
DanaC • Jun 25, 2012 10:31 am
It pains me to say it Toad, but everybody knows you throw like a girl.
jimhelm • Jun 25, 2012 11:24 am
It's a long slide into ignominy when you peak in your twenties.
Spexxvet • Jun 25, 2012 11:54 am
You. Play. The. Bass. The bass, man, the BASS. For all that is good in this eternity, give up the bass, and play the trout!
Undertoad • Jun 25, 2012 4:02 pm
Ah, good stuff you guys!

Before the great Graham Chapman died, he went on a college tour and a friend of mine saw his show. Said the first thing he did was to request that the audience insult him, nothing but insults, for the first five minutes. And people were coming up to him and shouting horrible things right to his face.

But then he probably had the problem with audiences loving and glorifying him too much. He was Brian and ironically the college audiences probably treated him like a religious figure. It probably changed the dynamic of the show, to the point where he could just talk to people and take questions.
Sundae • Jun 25, 2012 4:14 pm
Tony, you are not Brian... you are a very naughty boy.
Lord God Quirk • Jun 25, 2012 4:15 pm
so, what... you're about to make a speech?

You think we want to sit here and listen to your malodorous gob drone on and on for an hour talking about how cool you used to be? Do us all a favor and don't.

pasty faced misfit peckerwood.


:stomps off:
Cyber Wolf • Jun 25, 2012 4:36 pm
Does a kick to the shin count as an insult?
DanaC • Jun 25, 2012 4:40 pm
I think that's a marriage proposal isn't it?
jimhelm • Jun 25, 2012 6:04 pm
had enough, faggot?
Gravdigr • Jun 25, 2012 6:08 pm
You're a mean one, Mister Toad
You really are a heel,
You're as cuddly as a cactus, you're as charming as an eel, Mister Toad,

You're a bad banana with a greasy black peel!



You're a monster, Mister Toad,
Your heart's an empty hole,
Your brain is full of spiders, you've got garlic in your soul, Mister Toad,

I wouldn't touch you with a thirty-nine-and-a-half foot pole!



You're a vile one, Mister Toad,
You have termites in your smile,
You have all the tender sweetness of a seasick crocodile, Mister Toad,

Given a choice between the two of you I'd take the ... seasick crocodile!



You nauseate me, Mister Toad,
With a nauseous super "naus",
You're a crooked dirty jockey and you drive a crooked hoss, Mister Toad,

You're a three decker sauerkraut and toadstool sandwich, with arsenic sauce!



You're a foul one, Mister Toad,
You're a nasty wasty skunk,
Your heart is full of unwashed socks, your soul is full of gunk, Mister Toad,

The three words that describe you are as follows, and I quote, "Stink, Stank, Stunk!"



You're a rotter, Mister Toad,
You're the king of sinful sots,
Your heart's a dead tomato splotched with moldy purple spots, Mister Toad,

Your soul is an appalling dump heap overflowing with the most disgraceful assortment of rubbish imaginable, mangled up in tangled up knots!
zippyt • Jun 25, 2012 7:11 pm
You Cat faced Bastige !!!
footfootfoot • Jun 25, 2012 8:35 pm
Undertadpole is what the ladies say. Just sayin'
Aliantha • Jun 25, 2012 9:47 pm
You're such a girl UT.
limey • Jun 26, 2012 9:24 am
Aliantha;816954 wrote:
You're such a girl UT.


Surely that should be in the compliments thread? ;)


Sent by thought transference
Sundae • Jun 26, 2012 12:15 pm
Tony, Tony, grey and moany
Got as much taste as a stale calzone
When it comes to music he's a big old phoney
And nowhere near as smooth as mascarpone
BigV • Jun 26, 2012 3:05 pm
DOMFCOTL,ISN.

But thanks anyway.
Gravdigr • Jun 26, 2012 3:30 pm
You're waffly. There, I've said it.
DanaC • Jun 26, 2012 3:32 pm
Yehbut...waffly versatile.
Spexxvet • Jun 26, 2012 3:47 pm
I don't wanna talk to you no more, you empty headed animal food trough wiper! I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!

I burst my pimples at you and call your door-opening request a silly thing, you tiny-brained wipers of other people's bottoms!
limey • Jun 26, 2012 5:49 pm
I'd like to, UT, I really would, but I just don't have the time ....
sexobon • Jun 26, 2012 6:28 pm
What a fun·gi, Undertoad is so full of himself he shits toadstools.
DanaC • Jun 26, 2012 6:32 pm
He is a toad's stool.
lumberjim • Jun 26, 2012 6:33 pm
plus, his ass is cockprone
DanaC • Jun 26, 2012 6:41 pm
That's what I hear. "That Undertoad," they say, "that Undertoad, cockprone ass, he has"
footfootfoot • Jun 28, 2012 11:26 am
lumberjim;817200 wrote:
plus, his ass is cockprone


funniest thing I've heard all week
jimhelm • Jun 28, 2012 12:45 pm
difference between oral sex and anal?

Oral can make your day

Anal can make your hole weak
wolf • Jun 28, 2012 12:47 pm
You, sir, are a bass player.
Gravdigr • Jun 28, 2012 6:54 pm
You're ugly, and your mother dresses you funny.
monster • Jun 28, 2012 11:37 pm
You wish you were the bastard child of John R Sellers and Ibby, married to Merc and JBK was your firstborn.

What?
Gravdigr • Jun 29, 2012 5:11 pm
Goddamn, that's going too far.
Spexxvet • Jun 30, 2012 10:36 am
Gravdigr;817797 wrote:
Goddamn, that's going too far.


Yeah, should be marked NSFW or put in the tasteless humor thread. Think she kisses her mother with those fingers?
Griff • Jul 1, 2012 12:46 pm
Big D sang about you last night fancy boy.
[youtube]qsEKXKjPRWY[/youtube]
xoxoxoBruce • Jul 1, 2012 10:14 pm
Your turtle farts in your general direction.:p:
skysidhe • Jul 2, 2012 9:16 am
You're tooooo nice.
Lamplighter • Jul 2, 2012 11:36 am
Ouch ! Sky, you too have gone too far... ;)
Gravdigr • Jul 2, 2012 5:29 pm
Your face is made for radio.