What tisks you off at work?

-- Ooops, it's supposed to be "ticks", not "tisks", I can't edit the subject title now, too late. -- mw


OK, what ticks you off at work? Not the "lazy co-worker" thing, not the bad boss thing, not the no raise or bonus thing...

The, "Who the hell spit in the water fountain?" type of thing.

What disgusting, irritating, un-nerving, kind of thing just irks the hell out of you at work?

Is it the co-worker who doesn't wash their hands after goin wee-wee? The guy who coughs up lung chunks (sorry)? Or the bitchy woman who is the cashier in the cafeteria?

What is it, who is it, and/or what do they do?

Rule: No real names of employees, if you are refering to one, we don't want to open ourselves up to that.

Why do I ask this?

I went to drink out of the water fountain today, and someone had spit in it. Why? Why do people spit in foutains? It's sick. Atleast wash it down. (No, I'll leave it for the next person to look at up close) Ick...

That's my beef for today, what's yours?

Getting a one hour shift at 8 in the morning and then working from 9 to midnight that same night. That's my beef for the week.

Originally posted by mw451
OK, what ticks you off at work? Not the "lazy co-worker" thing, not the bad boss thing, not the no raise or bonus thing...

Ayup...i know where you work :)

Mine happens to be the 'need' to occupy the stall beside me in the ladies' room. Now really, if I wanted company, I'd ask for it, why must someone pick the stall beside the ONLY occupied one in a somewhat large facility?

Dagney

who's just FULL of gossip today

Not having any co-workers at all.

Originally posted by Dagney


Ayup...i know where you work

Yep, but I'm trying to figure out your location :)

Somewhat large facility, in VA?

Originally posted by mw451


Yep, but I'm trying to figure out your location :)

Somewhat large facility, in VA?

Nope, little further north, 2nd offical "location" of the cat herders. Have been around since Ross :) Our site just turned 40 actually..right after the company did.

Dagney

the fucking coffee in the break room. i swear, i walked into the break room one day and the coffee smelled like tuna fish.

~james

[rant]Too much work, with too few resources.

Having only one doctor available for evaluations, even when faced with 5 patients arriving within an hour of each other, and knowing that there are 4 more circling the drain, waiting to pounce.

Knowing that of the above-described 9 people, 2 need psychiatric treatment, and 7 ran out of money for drugs and are pretending to be suicidal for three hots and a cot.

Mindbogglingly stupid people that seem to exist solely to irk me and waste my time.

Being on hold for 45 minutes with an insurance company.

Having to redo something three times ... on paper, on the 'old' computer system, and on the 'new' computer system because we are technologically backwards.

Visitors.

People who are incapable of doing the job in the first place applying for the job. Additionally the inability of the people who do the hiring to recognize this at the first interview. Or during training. Or at the time of the probationary review.

Not getting to go to lunch/dinner/break. EVER. [/rant]

(can you tell I just got home from work?)

Originally posted by Undertoad
Not having any co-workers at all.

Trade you. If I could sustain/improve my lifestyle, I would be there. Yes, I understand what a drag it is having to do everydamn thing yourself, from prospecting leads to changing the roll in the potty, but I haven't ever had that opportunity. I'd like to try it.

I'm the office manager for a moderately large commercial roofing firm. I frequently have to hire large numbers of roofers all at one time to meet staffing demands when big jobs are starting up. It is really irritating on several levels:

1) Many literally cannot tell time, or fail to feel bound by scheduling requirements. You tell them show up at 8:00, they show up at 10:30 and act as though you've inconvenienced them.
2) They argue with you when you tell them the way something is going to be.
3) They ask for an advance in pay or a letter stating that they've been working there for (insert number here) weeks.
4) When told to completely fill out an application, they don't.

There's lots more, but these are the biggest pissers. And this is people who are *trying to get a job from us*, not the guys we already have working. That's an entire other layer of BS.

You forgot one, El ...

5) Guaranteed to either drink or do drugs on on the job. It is unclear whether this is dependence, mere recreation, or a desire to be better able to fall off a roof to generate a workmans comp claim along with a liability suit.

(I have met a lot of roofers in the course of my job. They are generally part of the seven of the nine, not the two.)

My only problem with the roofers is when they bang out "I'm going to kill you" in morse code.

(Emo Philips)

Originally posted by wolf
You forgot one, El ...

5) Guaranteed to either drink or do drugs on on the job. It is unclear whether this is dependence, mere recreation, or a desire to be better able to fall off a roof to generate a workmans comp claim along with a liability suit.

(I have met a lot of roofers in the course of my job. They are generally part of the seven of the nine, not the two.)

It takes a special brain chemistry to do that job. My house is a 12/12 pitch so it was a mother to do. But after a couple days on it I was comfortable, which probably made me dangerous.

--People that vocalize when using the bathroom

--People that talk about reality shows (Survivor, American Idol, etc.)

--People that don't wash their hands after using the bathroom, then try to shake someone's hand

--People that just throw their cigarettes to the ground when there is a perfectly good ashtray next to them (although I am guilty of this from time to time)

Originally posted by Undertoad
Not having any co-workers at all.

Yep. For the longest time I was utterly content not seeing anyone. But lately I've found myself hanging around the cellar too much, so I'm making some changes.

Originally posted by wolf
You forgot one, El ...

5) Guaranteed to either drink or do drugs on on the job. It is unclear whether this is dependence, mere recreation, or a desire to be better able to fall off a roof to generate a workmans comp claim along with a liability suit.

*That* was one of the other layers of BS to which I was referring. The laughable thing about it is all the federal regulations and insurance company policies which force us to durg test these guys. Doesn't anyone realize that if you can only hire and work drug and alcohol free roofers that there will never again be another roof completed in this country?

And in all honesty, I *know* what crappy, nasty work roofing is...if I had to do it for a living, I'd probably be a drunken drug addict, too.

There is this obnoxious woman that I have to temporarily and only tangently work with. (thank god). She's born, raised Brooklyn, NY. She has this total stuck-up demeanor and quasi British/Irish/French wierd, fakey accent. Its a strange affectation. When she is ticked off, suddenly she swings back to Brooklyn.

There is a laid back level around here which makes most of the little ticks roll off.

Due to a push to save money, the company decided to convert 1/2 of a factory floor into office space. Nice walls, halls, desks, etc. All propped up w/ dandy plasterboard.

The other 1/2 is used for shipping and receiving. So while you work, you get to hear trucks unloading, palettes moving, the beep-beep-beeping of forklifts, not to mention the door alarm going off every 15 minutes... all while trying talk on the phone to a customer.

Ahhhhhh, I love the modern work-environment. We have it oh so much better than those who came before us. /sarcasm

The security system (inbound) at the main gate has failed once again.

The guy that parks diagonally across 2 parking slots.

Getting a call on my works mobile from a withheld number and missing the call.

The guy that has been to the toilet and managed a double somersault whilst emptying his bowls.

Washing your hands and no hand towel.

An email with no content..

A new receptionist that knows nothing.

An old receptionist that knows everything.

A coffee machine with no cups.

A coffee machine with no coffee.

A canteen lady with a tissue up her sleeve.

In the canteen having my plate cleared when have got up to get a drink.

Preparing a presentation and missing the last page.

Sitting opposite the office giggler, who sits next to the office comedian.

The office comedian.

The stapler going missing.

Reps cold calling.

Reps with no give aways.

Reps who come back after beeing told, no business thankyou.

Having to deal with the boss's reps.

Network lock up ..

A conversation with a help desk.

I hate my friggin' cubicle.

When I got hired here, I had my very own office with my very own door. Then we hired more faculty and they moved another staff member in with me to make room. Which was fine - it was a bit cramped but my co-worker is a nice person and I like her. So we made do.

Then we hired MORE faculty, and don't you know, they ALL need their very own offices. Even if they are retired, or only work part time. Our office was given to a woman who never uses it. Never. She has another office across campus where she spends 95% of her time. The only time I've ever seen her here is for faculty meetings. I'm here 40 hours a week whether I like it or not. Every time I pass by that locked door and that empty office, I feel my ass frosting over.

My co-worker and I got moved into these closet-sized cubicles in the business office. I have no door because the walls of the cube on that side are not parallel to each other. It is impossible to have a private conversation on the phone. When someone who has forgotten their password needs to call me to get it, I have to find an unoccupied area and call them back on my cell phone so I'm not sharing that information with whatever random strangers happen to be around at the time.

When I do training, there isn't enough room for both my student and I to sit at the computer, which makes everything take longer. The mailboxes and water cooler are right behind me so I get to hear people schlepping back and forth behind me all damn day. I get to the point where I am able to ignore it, and someone comes up behind me and goes "HI!" and scares the beejezus out of me.

I suppose when next summer comes and we hire yet more faculty, we'll be working in the hall.

My current pet peeve would have to be that person that sits next to you and has a position entirely independent of your own but feels the need to butt into everything you do.

And then there are those people who have to tell you all of the terrible news they find about the company you work for and email it to you like constant reminders of what a shitty job they think you have.

Let us not forget the "oreo cookie" managers. They give you a nice back-handed compliment one minute, next thing you know you are in their office listening to a growling rant about meeting statistics and "the volatile state of this business" (whatever that means.) Usually another poignantly placed back-handed compliment will follow, of course.

And how about that person with the screeching voice that always seems to have a presentation in the meetings...the voice that starts to make you want to climb the walls.

People who walk by me after lunch smelling like Fried food or hotdogs. Damn that is annoying.

I have to say the thing that bugs me at work is being in the office pretty much by myself. My whole team is either San Jose or North Carolina based.

i have a co-worker who believes absolutely everything he reads online.

"dude, we need to start looking for jobs! i read in (insert random website here) that the tech industry will never recover and that within 6 months our jobs will be obsolete!"

nevermind that its an opinion piece on some 13-year-old kids blog hosted on aol. its online and he read it so its just got to be true!

this same coworker knows absolutely everything there is to know about anything and everything even remotely related to computers. always willing to share his 'expertise' in any conversation, whether invited to or not. and when hes wrong and hes called on it, hes still not wrong. youre 'misguided'.

god i hate him.

~james

The people who call Helpdesk. Freaking clueless. It's a f***ing bank, people! "I'm not realy computer literate, heh, heh, heh!" No f***ing sh*t!!! never would have guessed! These are the people handling your money! Many times, these are the people managing the people who handle your money!

An analagous situation would be a mechanic who smashes everything under your hood with a hammer, then says he's not good with tools.

Carbon-based error, id10t error, keyboard-chair interface issue...

oh yeah, that fucking gets to me.

'ive been using this machine for 3 years now, but im not computer literate.'

'i bought this car 3 years ago, but i dont know how to drive'

'we got this knife set when we got married 30 years ago, but i just cant seem to use them without lopping off a finger'

~james

I work for an employer who has decided that all software engineers need to work sixty hours a week. Sixty. That's 12 hours a day, five days a week, or 10 hours a day six days a week. Other obligations be damned, we all have to work 60, at the pain of losing our jobs. Talk about taking advantage of the poor job market.

One co-worker's wife is in the hospital, recently suffered renal failure and may be near death... and they won't let him off the hook. He can't afford to lose his job and family medical benefits, so rather than spending what may be the last hours of her life with his wife, he's at work, and probably accomplishing nothing except chewing a few ulcers in his stomach lining. Hopefully he'll get FMLA going soon, but the cold, emotionless response of management here is almost enough to set off the gag reflex.

A few months ago the new CEO decided to lay off all employees on a project, about 60 of them, and told them that if they wanted their jobs back, they could re-apply for them, and renegotiate their (now lower) salary. That way they can weed out employees they don't like, and pay those they do like less money. Brilliant!

I work for pure evil. I used to have a good work ethic, but they've wrung it out of me, and what was once a good, loyal employee is now little more than a waste of space while at work. Blah.

What company do you work for?

Isn't it funny how people often use the phrase, "It's just business" to excuse their actions? I believe the phrase is supposed to mean, "I am exempt from morality. So it's okay!"

i think theres a time and a place for saying 'its just business'. but on the other hand, jujus right, its all too often used as an excuse. im fortunate enough to work for a company that (almost) always uses that phrase correctly. pastramis company does sound like pure evil :).

i understand that sometimes there have to be layoffs. often, it really is just business.

but pulling shit like enron did, telling themselves it was just business so they could sleep at night is fucked up and i hope the suffer they karmic retribution they so richly deserve.

~james

I think it would be imprudent of me to name my employer, sorry juju. Too many gotchas attached to that. Particularly because they are 100% pure, no-preservatives-added, I-can't-beleive-it's-not-butter EVIL. I can't afford to put my job in jeopardy at this very moment.

Hopefully good ol' Karma will take a giant shit on the decision makers, and the world will be at peace and stuff.

Hot Pastrami

What letter does it start with and where is it headquartered?

It used to start with an E, but as of about two weeks ago, it starts with a D. Yes, another sign of a robust company, arbitrarily changing the business name. It is headquartered in Provo, Utah.

This will probably result in getting me fired fast than a trumpet full of pencils. Oh well. Anybody know of any companies in Utah hiring programmers or graphic designers? Heheh.

Hot Pastrami
http://www.alanbellows.com

Delete the message, PM Tony and I the name of it.

Wouldn't be the first time this has happened. If you want me to delete the message, lemme know. (You can delete it yourself within a certain time frame.)

If you do get fired, just remember that they are doing you a huge favor. Tough times don't last and this particular tough times has about six months left on it, by a lot of people's figuring.

'toad, I sincerely hope you're right about that!

I need those tough times to speed up...if I have to send one more resume off, I'm going to take out all my frustration on...Shepps!

(Sorry amigo. I was going to choose Slang, but he seems more likely to blow my head off.)

That was a shame about kezdeth...his stories were funny, and he got a raw deal out of that.

Originally posted by hot_pastrami
A few months ago the new CEO decided to lay off all employees on a project, about 60 of them, and told them that if they wanted their jobs back, they could re-apply for them, and renegotiate their (now lower) salary. That way they can weed out employees they don't like, and pay those they do like less money. Brilliant!

Something similar like that happened with the employees at my last assignment (Radian, a large mortgage insurance company). They decided to slice and dice customer service and premium processing, put some functions from one into the other, and vice versa. Everyone in those two departments had to repost for their jobs in August...and it was made fairly clear that some folks would lose their jobs.

So, people reposted for their jobs, and sweated it out for 2 months while people were interviewed, decisions made, etc. They even posted the positions outside the company (on Careerbuilder)...squeeze those balls a little tighter.

So, in early November, everything was settled. Everyone found out...that they were all keeping their jobs. In fact, they had to hire a few more bodies, b/c they were short-staffed. They bumped everyone's salary grades up...but not their salaries.

I'm so glad I passed up the chance to work there permanently...from what I've heard since leaving there 4 weeks ago, things have gone further downhill.

Well don't take it out on me.

Tell you what, I'll give you 30% of any web work you bring in for me. You generate the leads, you get the pitch, 30% of what I collect is yours.

There. Now you don't have to send out resumes. All you have to do is all the sales crap that I refuse to do.

Ya know, Tony, in your FARK profile picture you're looking good!

Have you lost mass?

Why thank you sir. I posted that same pic around here somewhere, so nobody's missing anything. It just turned out OK is all. I'm down from the weight in that "worst picture of me ever taken" from that old article that was from my website. Regular walking is taking some of the load off my old wide load.

Originally posted by perth
i have a co-worker who [color=red]believes absolutely everything he reads online[/color].

"dude, we need to start looking for jobs! i read in (insert random website here) that the tech industry will never recover and that within 6 months our jobs will be obsolete!"

nevermind that its an opinion piece on some 13-year-old kids blog hosted on aol. its online and he read it so its just got to be true!

this same coworker [color=red]knows absolutely everything there is to know about anything and everything even remotely related to computers[/color]. always willing to share his 'expertise' in any conversation, whether invited to or not. and [color=red]when hes wrong and hes called on it, hes still not wrong. youre 'misguided'[/color].

god i hate him.

~james

[SIZE=3]Wow, perth works in the next cube over from Radar!
[/SIZE]

Originally posted by 99 44/100% pure


[SIZE=3][b]Wow, perth works in the next cube over from Radar!
[/SIZE] [/B]

shit. hey, pastrami, are they hiring where you work?

~james

Originally posted by Undertoad
Tell you what, I'll give you 30% of any web work you bring in for me. You generate the leads, you get the pitch, 30% of what I collect is yours.

Is that right? Well, shit, you give me a contact number, and I'll start spreading the word shortly. As a matter of fact, my hamster started running the wheel last night...I know the perfect place to start.

Originally posted by perth

this same coworker knows absolutely everything there is to know about anything and everything even remotely related to computers. always willing to share his 'expertise' in any conversation, whether invited to or not. and when hes wrong and hes called on it, hes still not wrong.

Ahhh.... exactly the opposite of me! In my case, because I'm the "IT Guy" (director of a staff of 1.5 FTE including myself), I SHOULD know everything about computers, and there's sometimes bafflement as to how, if I'm really competent, I don't always know how to fix the problem instantly. (I have my own thoughts about my competency, but that's a different story.)

Originally posted by hot_pastrami
It used to start with an E, but as of about two weeks ago, it starts with a D
http://www.alanbellows.com

Damn, and I thought for sure it was EDS...

They did that to my wife's old group. She got laid off about 2 years ago with 14 weeks pay, 2 for each year. Then, like a year later, they cut the max lay off payout to 4 weeks, (30 years' you get 4 weeks pay). Then they made all the employees in her old group re-apply (HR group). Then they laid off whoever didn't make the cut, but most were wise enought to transfer out first.

Some companies do some really shitty things, but I will say that EDS has been good to me.... well except for that I am way overdue for a raise, (and yes I do deserve one).

this ones a fuckin doozy. im provoked to near fits of savage rage when i see this:

customer calls in with a problem. ANY FUCKING PROBLEM you can imagine. my coworkers response:

"run defrag and scandisk and call us back if the problem persists"

i wish i could put into text the noise my blackened soul makes when i see this.

~james

Hehe, I used to be like that then I discovered that it solves absolutly nothing except for maybe an occasional slow program launch. I've discovered it's a great thing to stall people who need help with Windows ME or 98 and I'm not going to have time in the next few days as usually they forget to shut down all processes and the thing never finishes. It's also amazing the amount of people who actually swear their computer is much faster after defrag it for them.

Not even sure if I should start, 'cause I hate my job a lot. This could get rambly, feel free to skip how much ever you please.

First off, I'm a computer guy. However, I work in a goddamn cafe, 'cause I got the job to make it through Tech school, and haven't been able to find a 'real' job yet. I just got turned down for my last, last ditch effort, and I'm now applying for a..... sales job. Anyway. Here goes.

People who make stupid faces when looking at the menu.

People who, when I ask if they want their receipt, say something like, "No, you can keep it."

People who give coupons after I've finished ringing the order up, so I have to cancel the transaction and start all over. Fuck I hate that.

People who don't decide what they want until they've gone through the line, and proceed to hold up the line for 10 minutes while making stupid faces at the menu board, then decide they want 'Pepsi please' (We sell Coke.)

People who ask me, "Do you sell coffee here?" (It's a frigging CAFE!)

People who pick up my "Recycling only" sign, move it aside, then proceed to throw non-recyclable things into my recycling bin.

People who don't tip. Fucking bastards. (As a side, if you don't tip waiters/waitresses/barristas/just about anyone doing you a service.... I probably hate you.)

Co-workers who've been there for more than a month and -still- don't know how to do their jobs.

People who can't bother to be to work on time. I'm a lazy, lazy bastard, and I'm at work early every day.

People who can't pronounce things properly, even though I've corrected them before and it's the only way to logically pronounce it.

People who change their orders.

People who try to tell me that I'm making something wrong.

People who ask for extras in their drinks after they've been rung up.

People who pay for everything in change.

People who pay with huge bills first thing in the morning. (I won't even accept 50's and laugh if they try a 100$)

People who act like their doing me a favour by coming to my job and being assholes.

Assholes.

People that are twice the age of my female coworkers, and try to flirt with them.

People.

My boss' inability to keep the most basic supplies in stock, even though she's been doing this for over 3 months now.

My boss.

Name tags.

Strangers who call me by my name tag. I fucking hate that.

People who desparately want to be 'regulars', but are too stupid/anal/assholish/etc to ever be accepted.

When people don't know what something is, order it without asking me what it is, and then proceed to try to make me make something else because they hate it.

People who use Starbucks' terms at the Border's Cafe.

The fact that the people of this 'city' have nothing better to do on a friday night than to come to a book store's cafe and hang out.

People who hang out at the cafe for longer than my shift.

Yeah. I'm done now. I could go on, but it's getting boring, I'm sure.

Sales may not be the ideal field for you.

Stress Puppy, are you sure you don't work in a small cafe in the northeastern most corner of Montana?

I am the office manager for a moderately large roofing company here in KC ($5 Million gross sales last year, 60 employees at our location - we are a branch office). As we really only have an office staff of two, I wear a lot of hats, including HR, EEO, OSHA, AP, AR, Payroll, construction submittals, warranties, communications, computers, purchasing and - my personal fave, workman's compensation.

Roofers are a different breed...unfortunately, they verge on being a different *inbreed*. As such, roofers, as employees, present us with absolutely all the possible problems you could have with an employee. They are almost universally drinkers, they more often than not use drugs, they have revoked drivers licenses or so many violations that they cannot operate a company vehicle according to the insurer. They are frequently parolees with POs calling everyday to make sure they are actually at work, they fake or overstate injuries in order to profit via compensatory insurance. They call and tell you they have to go to court the way other people would tell you they had to stay home with a sick kid (and they see nothing unusual in the fact that they spend lots of time in court), theft of tools and materials is rampant (most roofers put on side jobs on their days off, despite their union contract which forbids it). If they slack off or do shoddy work and you fire them, it is not at all unusual to be threatened for your trouble, and fighting on the job between roofers is fairly common as well. 25% or so, on average, will have garnishments to be dealt with, and I field about six or seven calls from collection agencies per day (and they want to argue with me because I won't take a message for them). Their wives/girlfriends call me frequently, either to check up and make sure they came to work in the first place or to tell me that they are hooked on drugs and I should have them tested. Few, if any, can spell any word over four letters, and the only math they know is that they were a day short on their check. We have large numbers of Hispanics, who work really, really hard, and generally shame the American roofers alongside whom they toil, but I don't speak Spanish, and communication can be difficult. And don't get me started on illegal aliens and fake ID's.

Why am I telling you all this? Who the hell knows. Just needed to vent, and this seems to be a thread that doesn't end. I really like my job in general, it is the people I have to deal with that make me want to spit nails.

Stress Puppy, I'm afraid to ask what "city" you're referring to... I can't decide whether I ought to avoid your place of employment, or come visit and see you in action! :cool:

If his journal is accurate, he's in PA, between York and Baltimore.

My er workplace is becoming unmanagable because of the geese. I'm gonna go postal and their will be no consequences bwaha!

except perhaps for the consequence of having plenty of roast goose in the coming months?

[COLOR=darkblue]Where we work, people are known for bringing in dishes or take-out for meetings, parties, etc. Well, there was this cheap bastard who would always bring in either drinks or paper products. (Napkins, plates, etc.)

Now, I don't mind someone bringing in pre-packaged food. That's fine. Not everyone has the time or ability to cook. But if there are plates, napkins, etc that we can pull from the break room, as well as sodas, there's no need for someone else to bring those things in. Is it too much to ask that the guy pick up, I dunno...a box of wings, or more French onion dip. [/COLOR]

I knew someone who would regularly bring a can of chickpeas to every company function.

Nothing else. Just the chickpeas.

Not surprisingly, they didn't get opened or eaten (he brought the chickpeas, not a can opener, not a salad to put them on, not some garlic and olive oil to make hummus out of them. Just chickpeas.)

At the end of the event, he'd take the chickpeas back. I think he kept them in the office in the event a party might break out at a random moment and he'd need to bring 'something'.

And, as you might expect, he was the king of taking home the leftovers.

Bastard.

[COLOR=darkblue]Exactly. That kind of thing kills me. And this guy would be the main one guarding our food if someone else came over. It's like, "Yeah slick, I saw them eyeing your napkins. You might want to get over there, you know away from my desk."

And that's another thing. I don't mind sharing, but I think it would be great if everyone on our team had a chance to pick up something first. At least, before the rest of our building starts coming over and taking liberties. I didn't make enough dirty rice or bring enough chicken for the entire site. All those other shits can wait for the leftovers as far as I'm concerned.[/COLOR]

Ah, now theres some beauty in the chickpea thing...
You could bring a can opener and a big spoon and just chow them right out of the can, then hand back the empty tin. And say "MAN! I be wanting a wack of garbanzos" Then a big sloppy kiss on the forehead.

Don't forget to swing by his cubical later on in the day. "An vacant house is better than a bad tenant."