Question for Sheldon

Are human sexual fluids kosher?

Just wondering, and you are the obvious person to ask.

I don't know any Rabbis that would be likely to bless your goo, sir.

I'm just trying to sement my relationship with the Lord.

It's vegan.

I thought bottom feeders were non-kosher.

A Jewish ex-boyfriend once assured me that semen was kosher, which he knew because he'd had to verify it with their rabbi after one of the kids in his youth group asked. Feel free to give that anecdote whatever amount of validity you'd like.

ZenGum;654295 wrote:

I'm just trying to sement my relationship with the Lord.

I see what you did there.

ZenGum;654292 wrote:

Are human sexual fluids kosher?

Only after the bris and the bar-mitzvah are properly executed.

Off with the head!

Undertoad;654296 wrote:

It's vegan.

I suspect that you were making a joke. But I've posed the question to a number of vegan friends, and generally they go along with it on the grounds that humans are the only animal capable of granting consent.

But there are about as many definitions of veganism as there are vegans. so. YBWV - your blowjobs will vary?

monster;654300 wrote:

I thought bottom feeders were non-kosher.

You're doing it wrong.

Think about it gvidas: semen and human breast milk are the only legitimate sources of animal protein and certain amino acids for vegans.

I sense a business model here. Who's with me, investors wanted.

gvidas;656517 wrote:

I suspect that you were making a joke. But I've posed the question to a number of vegan friends, and generally they go along with it on the grounds that humans are the only animal capable of granting consent.

But there are about as many definitions of veganism as there are vegans. so. YBWV - your blowjobs will vary?

But the sperm are not able to grant their consent.....

Pie;656680 wrote:

"Every sperm is sacred, every sperm is great..."

Sperm maybe tasty, but you could've had a V-8:smack:

Sorry I missed this. As far as i know, kum ain't kosher.
It has to be blessed by a Rabbi. But now I wonder about the time I fucked a rabbinical student. ;)

xoxoxoBruce;656742 wrote:

Sperm maybe tasty, but you could've had a V-8:smack:

Does it count if I had it IN a v-8?

Undertoad;656559 wrote:

Think about it gvidas: semen and human breast milk are the only legitimate sources of animal protein and certain amino acids for vegans.

I sense a business model here. Who's with me, investors wanted.

"Got milked?"

"Ev'ry sperm is sacred, ev'ry sperm is great,"

xoxoxoBruce;656742 wrote:

Sperm may be tasty, but you could've had a V-8:smack:

Smack it enough with the scansion hammer, and the second line can be sung to that tune too.

Uh, I thought that was the point ...