Slightly wierd Christmas Eve

SamIam • Dec 23, 2009 4:02 pm
I accepted an invitation for Christmas Eve, thinking it would be a group gathering. It turns out that it will just be my host, "Bill," Bill's niece, her S.O. and me. The niece is pregnant and not married to her S.O. She is being supported by Bill who complains about the situation often. I feel very uncomfortable being the outsider in what may be a tense family situation. I would never have said I'd come had I known. How do I deal with this in a gracious manner?
Pie • Dec 23, 2009 4:06 pm
Um... unscheduled emergency?

"I think I'm coming down with H1N1"
"My cat's sick"
SamIam • Dec 23, 2009 4:26 pm
I have to admit that "calling in sick" is highly appealing. How do I get myself into these things, anyway? :headshake
Pie • Dec 23, 2009 4:39 pm
Governor Tarkin: You're far too trusting.
xoxoxoBruce • Dec 23, 2009 4:53 pm
Go, get real drunk real fast, the rest won't matter. ;)
Nirvana • Dec 23, 2009 5:37 pm
Psssssssssst XOB :eyebrow:

:stickpoke

http://cellar.org/showthread.php?t=21666
Griff • Dec 23, 2009 6:02 pm
Tell them you're hiking the Appalachian Trail.
monster • Dec 23, 2009 6:50 pm
What is your relationship with "Bill"? As in, are you close to the extent that his invitation might be a request for emotional support? And if so, you might need to be more sensitive in your excuse than you would if you were little more than passing acquaintances, for who a potential h1n1 relapse would be just fine. If you do chuck a sickie, pick something pregnant women should avoid being exposed to.
footfootfoot • Dec 23, 2009 8:57 pm
SamIam,

Being that you are all "on the wagon" and shit I think it is entirely ok for you to bow out gracefully saying you truly need to manage your very real holiday stress by excusing yourself from Bill's gathering. Be gracious and thankful, but be firm in taking care of your needs, vis-a-vis sobriety and avoiding triggers that would make you, and just about everyone else, want to seriously bevv-up.

Bill should understand. Especially if his last name begins with a W.
;)

BTW. You don't owe it to anyone to take care of them unless they are your own underage spoor.
SamIam • Dec 23, 2009 9:33 pm
monster;620172 wrote:
What is your relationship with "Bill"? As in, are you close to the extent that his invitation might be a request for emotional support? And if so, you might need to be more sensitive in your excuse than you would if you were little more than passing acquaintances, for who a potential h1n1 relapse would be just fine. If you do chuck a sickie, pick something pregnant women should avoid being exposed to.


Bill is more an aquaintance than a friend. I think he would go to other people besides me if he wanted support. [SIZE="1"]Its amazing how quickly those flu symptoms come on, isn't it?[/SIZE]
zippyt • Dec 23, 2009 9:43 pm
Its amazing how quickly those flu symptoms come on, isn't it?

You Are Looking a Bit Green around the Gills .

Best stay Home and heal up .
glatt • Dec 23, 2009 9:49 pm
I like foot's advice. Honesty is usually the best policy.
xoxoxoBruce • Dec 23, 2009 11:08 pm
Nirvana;620143 wrote:
Psssssssssst XOB :eyebrow:

:stickpoke

http://cellar.org/showthread.php?t=21666

Oh yeah, sorry. :blush:
SamIam • Dec 24, 2009 11:50 am
No problem, Bruce! ;)
monster • Dec 24, 2009 12:07 pm
glatt;620214 wrote:
I like foot's advice. Honesty is usually the best policy.


usually, but not always, especially if honesty involves revealling some personal issues that you'd rather not share.

eeeeewwww, sam, please try to do that in your elbow or a Kleenex next time. I had no idea it was possible for lurgy molecules to fly that far. impressive!
footfootfoot • Dec 24, 2009 12:53 pm
monster;620333 wrote:
usually, but not always, especially if honesty involves revealling some personal issues that you'd rather not share.

eeeeewwww, sam, please try to do that in your elbow or a Kleenex next time. I had no idea it was possible for lurgy molecules to fly that far. impressive!

I'd call a lingering case of Ebola Zaire something that we'd all rather SamIAm not share...:D
SamIam • Dec 24, 2009 1:07 pm
Ooooh! Ebola! Does that come on quickly? I have already set the stage when I happened to run into Bill yesterday. I complained of a very bad headache and said I was on my way home to go lay down. I feel rather bad about my little white lie because Bill himself is a nice enough person. Unfortunately his family dynamic is just something that I really don't want to get drawn into, especially as a "hostage situation." I don't have a car and Bill would have to come get me. If I had my own ride, I could stop in for half an hour or so and flee if things started getting strange. Since this is not a possibility, ebola it is. :greenface
Pie • Dec 24, 2009 1:34 pm
To assuage your feelings of guilt and let Bill know that it's nothing personal, maybe you could suggest getting lunch at some later date. . . when you call to cancel the Christmas soiree.
capnhowdy • Dec 25, 2009 7:20 am
Take a date with you and make him entertain while you nosily plunder through their belongings. It'll be fun ... and they prolly won't ask you again.
DanaC • Dec 25, 2009 7:34 am
Pie;620349 wrote:
To assuage your feelings of guilt and let Bill know that it's nothing personal, maybe you could suggest getting lunch at some later date. . . when you call to cancel the Christmas soiree.


This!
Trilby • Dec 25, 2009 8:40 am
capnhowdy;620486 wrote:
Take a date with you and make him entertain while you nosily plunder through their belongings. It'll be fun ... and they prolly won't ask you again.


This!
Clodfobble • Dec 25, 2009 7:30 pm
So what did you end up doing, Sam?
SamIam • Dec 26, 2009 11:20 am
I called in sick. Bill didn't seem upset over it and I ended up spending Christmas with a couple of friends who don't have such potentially explosive family dynamics. ;)
Pie • Dec 26, 2009 11:26 am
SamIam;620661 wrote:
a couple of friends who don't have such potentially explosive family dynamics. ;)

Who are these folks? I thought they were a mythical beast, like unicorns. :rolleyes:

Glad you escaped, Sam.
SamIam • Dec 27, 2009 11:30 am
Pie;620662 wrote:
Who are these folks? I thought they were a mythical beast, like unicorns. :rolleyes:


Actually, their families all live far, far away so I don't really know if the families are dysfunctional or not. I think their is a direct relationship between distance and amount of dysfunction. ;)
Pie • Dec 27, 2009 1:11 pm
That's the classic advise given to bachelors: marry an orphan. :thumb:
TheMercenary • Dec 28, 2009 11:45 am
So Sam, how your Ebola virus doing. :)

Hope you are recovered! Get well soon.
SamIam • Dec 28, 2009 3:45 pm
Thank you, Merc, I'm recovering nicely. And apparently "Bill" is not too mad at me because he asked me to join him and the gang for a sober New Year's thing our town is putting on - no family allowed. LOL ;)
xoxoxoBruce • Dec 29, 2009 12:24 am
Pie;620877 wrote:
That's the classic advise given to bachelors: marry an orphan. :thumb:
But don't take their word for it... check thoroughly. :(