July 31, 2009: Beauty Pageant

xoxoxoBruce • Jul 31, 2009 1:17 am
Isn't she lovely
Isn't she wonderfull
Isn't she precious
.......

Image

Yes, a beauty:rolleyes: pageant for camels.

For nine days the animals paraded before a grandstand—camels of all sorts, the most prestigious being groupings of 35 females—and imperious judges waved away the homelier groups with their dejected owners. As the days passed, the judges rewarded certain standards with dispatch, winnowing a field of some 24,000 contestants.


I wonder if 35 camels is the ideal sized caravan?
But how do you tell a "pretty" camel from an ugly one?

But the judges in Abu Dhabi view camels with different eyes, scrutinizing them from nose to tail and back again, evaluating each according to strict criteria. Her ears must be firm. Her back high, her hump large and symmetrical. A rump that's not too big, with just enough room for a saddle. The hair, of course, must shine. A good head is massive. Her nose should have a strong arch in the bridge, sloping toward a bottom lip that hangs down like a bauble. A long neck appeals. As do long legs. And the judges examine the two toes of the feet, looking for what their guidelines call "toe-parting length."

Because so many beauty pageants, in the end, do come down to cleavage.


This is serious business, more for the prestige, bragging rights, than the prizes, which are "luxury sport-utility vehicles—more than 140 Range Rovers, Nissans, Toyotas, all prizes for various winners".

link
casimendocina • Jul 31, 2009 1:32 am
She is beautiful....almost as beautiful as the chocolate brown llama with long eyelashes and the oatmeal radar I met nearly a decade ago in Perth.
avail9988 • Jul 31, 2009 3:43 am
Funny, Wouldnt think they had so much water too splash around.
casimendocina • Jul 31, 2009 3:48 am
It's all about priorities.
xoxoxoBruce • Jul 31, 2009 3:53 am
avail9988;585283 wrote:
Funny, Wouldnt think they had so much water too splash around.
One of the finalists paid a million bucks for a camel, the other paid two million for three. They can afford to have water flown in from anywhere.

Welcome to the Cellar, avail9988.:D
capnhowdy • Jul 31, 2009 7:32 am
What a difficult decision. They are all so absolutely stunning. Kinda like choosing your cleanest dirty shirt.

"Wow! Just look at the hump on that contestant. Back to you, Bob."
spudcon • Jul 31, 2009 8:35 am
That first one has a big hairy mole on her hump. I once knew a girl who... uh, never mind.
Sheldonrs • Jul 31, 2009 9:36 am
I wonder how many of them have had hump jobs.
dacliff • Jul 31, 2009 10:02 am
Kinda like a Turducken:

<a href="http://www.recipezaar.com/Whole-Stuffed-Camel-67495">Whole Stuffed Camel</a>
birdclaw • Jul 31, 2009 10:10 am
Didn't someone make a song about this? "My lovely lady humps"?:headshake
newtimer • Jul 31, 2009 11:17 am
"...Her back high...rump that's not too big...The hair, of course, must shine...good head is massive. Her nose should have a strong arch in the bridge, sloping toward a bottom lip...A long neck appeals. As do long legs. And the judges examine the two toes of the feet..."

Before we judge their culture too harshly, keep in mind those are the same criteria used to judge the Miss Universe pageants. All the way from the shiny hair to the camel toe.
Sheldonrs • Jul 31, 2009 11:21 am
newtimer;585323 wrote:
"...Her back high...rump that's not too big...The hair, of course, must shine...good head is massive. Her nose should have a strong arch in the bridge, sloping toward a bottom lip...A long neck appeals. As do long legs. And the judges examine the two toes of the feet..."

Before we judge their culture too harshly, keep in mind those are the same criteria used to judge the Miss Universe pageants. All the way from the shiny hair to the camel toe.


:D I think I just threw up a little in my mouth.
dmg1969 • Jul 31, 2009 12:30 pm
I like big humps and I can not lie.
All you other sheiks can't deny
When a ungulate walks in with an itty-bitty neck
And a bumpy thing in your face
You get sprung!
Knight f3 • Jul 31, 2009 2:37 pm
When the contestants come out wearing their bikinis, we need a guy to come out and hose them down.
:p
Gravdigr • Jul 31, 2009 3:42 pm
newtimer;585323 wrote:
All the way from the shiny hair to the camel toe.


Yep, I was waiting for the camel toe I was...

dmg1969;585337 wrote:
I like big humps and I can not lie.
All you other sheiks can't deny
When a ungulate walks in with an itty-bitty neck
And a bumpy thing in your face
You get sprung!


THAT was inspired (and inspiring)!!
I wonder who does that rap, 'Sir Spits A Lot'?
Acatalepsy • Jul 31, 2009 6:06 pm
Does anyone else see the irony in the prizes?

"Sheik Al-Herrod, you've spent years caring for camels, learning the art passed down from your ancestors, born of necessity when camels were the only form of transportation in the harsh desert. All your work has paid off in this fine she-camel, which I'm sure you treasure. Your reward? It's a brand new CAR!"
richlevy • Jul 31, 2009 8:52 pm
Gravdigr;585367 wrote:
Yep, I was waiting for the camel toe I was...
Darn, you beat me to the camel toe joke.

I wonder if they put Vaseline on their teeth? They probably have their own 'pageant tricks' to get an edge on the competition.
xoxoxoBruce • Aug 1, 2009 12:57 am
Acatalepsy;585373 wrote:
Does anyone else see the irony in the prizes?

"Sheik Al-Herrod, you've spent years caring for camels, learning the art passed down from your ancestors, born of necessity when camels were the only form of transportation in the harsh desert. All your work has paid off in this fine she-camel, which I'm sure you treasure. Your reward? It's a brand new CAR!"


Welcome to the Cellar, Acatalepsy. :D
To answer your question, no more than a rodeo star winning a pickup truck.

Rube or hero, he unavoidably resembles the American cowboy. And just as well-to-do Americans breed, race, and show their horses, so do Bedouin with their camels. The Arabian gentleman, like the American, spends his weekends at his stables. He examines his animals, feeds them special food, showers them with affection. He barks at them, then sings a song of forgiveness. He loves them.