Euphemisms....

ZenGum • Mar 12, 2009 6:42 am
... for sex:
spending some quality time
making the beast with two backs

...for anal sex:
visiting vegemite valley
riding the chocolate weasel

...for masturbation:
spending some "me" time
polishing Darth Vader's helmet

... for vomiting:
technicolor yawn
driving the porcelain bus

C'mon peeps, post 'em if ya got 'em. Two of each kind, like with Noah.
Undertoad • Mar 12, 2009 9:41 am
....shitting:

dropping the kids off at the pool
taking the browns to the super bowl
Pie • Mar 12, 2009 9:51 am
vomiting:
'flaming yawn' (filet Mignon?)
Talking to god on the white telephone

Btw, here's something I have been pondering: is there any word for bathroom/outhouse/restroom/powderroom/WC that isn't a euphemism? The only ones I could come up with were 'shitter' or 'excrematorium'. The latter of which isn't even a word.
glatt • Mar 12, 2009 9:58 am
...for masturbation:
killing a hobo

;)
Shawnee123 • Mar 12, 2009 9:58 am
:blush:
Trilby • Mar 12, 2009 10:25 am
Pie - in Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf? (by edward albee) George says to their dinner guests, "I'm going to the euphamism," meaning the loo.

So, you see, the bathroom can be referred to simply as the "euphamism" and you're being literary as you say it. Comes in handy when your dining with snobs.
Flint • Mar 12, 2009 10:52 am
ZenGum;544349 wrote:
... for sex:
spending some quality time
making the beast with two backs

... for gay sex
making the beast with four balls

William Shakespeare » Othello » Act I. Scene I wrote:


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SCENE I. Venice. A street.

...
...
...

IAGO
I am one, sir, that comes to tell you your daughter
and the Moor are now making the beast with two backs.
Trilby • Mar 12, 2009 11:13 am
you know what's freaky?

they don't have "streets" in Venice.
Sundae • Mar 12, 2009 12:52 pm
For masturbation:
- Spending some time with Madam Palm and her five lovely daughters
- Washing your hand in sticky white love piss
- Giving a solo on the pink piccolo
- Charming the python until it spits
dar512 • Mar 12, 2009 12:57 pm
Brianna;544407 wrote:
Pie - in Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf? (by edward albee) George says to their dinner guests, "I'm going to the euphamism," meaning the loo.

So, you see, the bathroom can be referred to simply as the "euphamism" and you're being literary as you say it. Comes in handy when your dining with snobs.

I love it. I'll be using it at the next opportunity.
dar512 • Mar 12, 2009 1:01 pm
For menstruation:

- A visit from Aunt Flo

- Trolling for Vampires
DanaC • Mar 12, 2009 1:13 pm
Additional menstruation euph: Fallen to the communists.
Undertoad • Mar 12, 2009 1:32 pm
male urination = shake hands with the unemployed
Mad Professor • Mar 12, 2009 4:03 pm
coitus interruptus - get off at Redfern

sex - giving the dog a bone (c.f. AC/DC song of same name)

masturbation - crack one off, strangle the serpent

covering a turd with bog paper - Turin Shroud

menstruation - on the blob
Aliantha • Mar 12, 2009 6:25 pm
menstruation: riding the crimson wave

vomiting: yelling for ralph

toilet (number 2): giving birth to a pom (sorry UK friends, but some people do still say it here)

when refering to someone's arsehole: the chocolate starfish

the progeny of gay males: poo babies
Shawnee123 • Mar 12, 2009 6:29 pm
Poo babies! lmao!