Pardon my Penis

lumberjim • Jan 8, 2009 4:15 pm
http://cellar.org/showthread.php?t=19184

excuse me while i whip this out

careful, you'll step on it.


oh i'm sorry....well who told you to bend over in front of it like that......the thing has a mind of it's own, i swear.

actually it's only 4 inches.....from the ground.


i jest....it's only 3 inches ....but diameter isn't everything.


cock
DanaC • Jan 8, 2009 4:21 pm
That's brilliant. A multi-layered clone thread.
Shawnee123 • Jan 8, 2009 4:25 pm
It's Cockamania! Cockapalooza! Cockporium!
Flint • Jan 8, 2009 4:27 pm
This year the winter storms have left us overstocked and up to our necks in...[SIZE="3"] Cock rings![/SIZE] Cock rings! [SIZE="1"][COLOR="Gray"]Cock rings.[/COLOR][/SIZE]
Cicero • Jan 8, 2009 4:29 pm
What? Where? *looks around* lol!
DanaC • Jan 8, 2009 4:34 pm
Flint;520159 wrote:
This year the winter storms have left us overstocked and up to our necks in...[SIZE="3"] Cock rings![/SIZE] Cock rings! [SIZE="1"][COLOR="Gray"]Cock rings.[/COLOR][/SIZE]



Fuck, I'd just taken a mouthful of tea. It started as a slight smile, then I got to the echo and choked.
lumberjim • Jan 8, 2009 4:46 pm
::cough::chokes on cock rings:::cough:::
DanaC • Jan 8, 2009 4:47 pm
:condom:
Elspode • Jan 8, 2009 7:37 pm
How can I pardon your penis if we don't know what its been convicted of? Breaking and entering? Failure to yield? Operating a public nuisance?
lumberjim • Jan 8, 2009 7:45 pm
p walking :(
footfootfoot • Jan 8, 2009 8:00 pm
Dumping waste in a recreation area
footfootfoot • Jan 8, 2009 8:02 pm
Does anyone remember that NAtional Lampoon parody of WWII proganda posters,
"Loose tits sink ships"

That was funny. I wonder whatever happened to all my old national lampoons?
capnhowdy • Jan 8, 2009 8:17 pm
I loved the 'poon.

BTW the charges are as follows: Disturbing the peice.
monster • Jan 8, 2009 9:26 pm
Looks like -rather than a pardon- jim's penis has been released into wolf's care.....

Image
DanaC • Jan 8, 2009 9:32 pm
Bet that pinches...
TheMercenary • Jan 8, 2009 9:47 pm
Lends new meaning to the Pocket Protector.
monster • Jan 8, 2009 9:54 pm
I finally had to find out what a pocket protector actually was. You merkins talk about them all the time, but let me tell you... Brits have bred generations of geeks and nerds without the assistance of such contraptions..... always with the consumerism...
DanaC • Jan 8, 2009 9:55 pm
what is a pocket protector?
monster • Jan 8, 2009 9:57 pm
Image

:lol:
monster • Jan 8, 2009 9:59 pm
Image

was what I meant to post, but my accidental repost made me snort so hard my nosebleed restarted, so i left it there! :lol:
DanaC • Jan 8, 2009 10:00 pm
Ohhh. To stop pens blowing ink in your pockets. I see.

Thankyou :)
classicman • Jan 8, 2009 11:42 pm
DanaC;520315 wrote:
Ohhh. To stop penises blowing in your pockets. I see.

Thankyou :)


fixed that for ya
TheMercenary • Jan 10, 2009 8:39 am
Flint;520159 wrote:
This year the winter storms have left us overstocked and up to our necks in...[SIZE="3"] Cock rings![/SIZE] Cock rings! [SIZE="1"][COLOR="Gray"]Cock rings.[/COLOR][/SIZE]

Speaking of weather, sure would hate to be a cock in this stuff:


http://www.accuweather.com/news-top-headline.asp?partner=accuweather&traveler=0&date=2009-01-09_21:55

Enjoy the snow suckers. It has been in the 60's and 70's here all week.
DanaC • Jan 10, 2009 8:40 am
It's -3 'ere.
TheMercenary • Jan 10, 2009 9:04 am
/shudders/ ugg... I really do not miss that weather. I will do my utmost to never live where it snows again.
HungLikeJesus • Jan 10, 2009 12:01 pm
Ah, you're such a wimp. It's 15°F (-9 C) and I was outside this morning without a coat.

You need to toughen up a bit.
DanaC • Jan 10, 2009 2:51 pm
This from a man so freaked out by water he walked over it.
SteveDallas • Jan 10, 2009 2:58 pm
Back on topic . . . . .

It's only ten days till the inauguration. If you want your penis pardoned, you'd better hurry up and contact President Bush.
DanaC • Jan 10, 2009 3:07 pm
So that's what a gentleman's excuse me is...
HungLikeJesus • Jan 10, 2009 3:08 pm
Can Bush pardon a penis?

I'm sure there's a joke in there somewhere.
lumberjim • Jan 10, 2009 5:22 pm
and there is a poem in

can hunglikejesus
pardon my penis?
monster • Jan 10, 2009 5:48 pm
I'm not the penis pardoner, I'm the penis pardoner's son
and I'm only pardoning penises until the penis pardoners cum
Nirvana • Jan 10, 2009 9:32 pm
>Pinot Noir thru the nose < :eek:
capnhowdy • Jan 11, 2009 10:22 am
Bush pardon a penis?

Hell, Bush IS a penis.
richlevy • Jan 11, 2009 10:56 am
footfootfoot;520247 wrote:
Does anyone remember that NAtional Lampoon parody of WWII proganda posters,
"Loose tits sink ships"

That was funny. I wonder whatever happened to all my old national lampoons?
You can find anything on the Internet.
ZenGum • Jan 11, 2009 8:58 pm
Your petition for a pardon is denied.

Executioner - off with his head! :behead:
Sundae • Jan 12, 2009 7:02 am
There's an advert I must get a photo of for y'all.
It's on the bus stop I walk past nearly every day and is for McDonalds Pound Saver Chicken Mayo burger.

The thing is, I don't think the mayo in the picture is really of the right viscosity. It just doesn't look as opaque as it should. Every time I look at the huge burger, wider across than I am, the first thing that comes into my head is Sperm Burger!!! Arrrgh! McSalty McSpermy Chicken!!!!

And I usually spray out a big guffaw and then smile all the way home.

ETA: the same shot (pun intended) is not used on the internet advert - I've just checked. Damn, I really will have to go and photograph it.
TheMercenary • Jan 12, 2009 7:35 am
Sounds funny. Put it on so we can play with it in Photoshop. :D
Sundae • Jan 12, 2009 9:50 am
It really doesn't show up in this picture.
It is a little more spermy than this photo suggests.

Truth is, once I had made the McMayo/ McSemen connection, it just made me laugh every time.

Especially with the tagline.
Clodfobble • Jan 12, 2009 2:11 pm
Ew, yes you're right Sundae, that's not proper mayonnaise at all. That is totally a sperm-burger.
capnhowdy • Jan 12, 2009 5:13 pm
That's just Mcdisgusting. And then some. Maybe it'll never make it across the pond.