The Passing of a Wonderful Woman

Elspode • Oct 13, 2008 11:12 pm
We just returned from my wife's youngest Aunt's home. Aunt Lela lost her five year battle with ovarian cancer early this evening, in the comfort of her own bed and surrounded by extended family, aged 64 years. There must have been forty people there, milling in and out of the bedroom where Lela's body lay clad in a pink dressing gown, clutching a gold pendant sent with her sister Jan who arrived from Florida only this afternoon, packed into a seven seat van with eight other people.

Selene's Aunt Lela was without a doubt the most upbeat, positive, sunny human being I've ever known. No one deserves to fight such a prolonged and decimating battle against their own body, but Lela surely deserved it less than anyone possibly could. I am going to miss her powerfully. She was one of those people who lit up a room when she entered it. She remembered everyone's names without fail - even those of nurses she hadn't seen for months when she was in her last hospitalization less than a week ago, always more concerned about whether she was being a burden than she was about her own pain.

While I am not a Christian, it is so abundantly clear to me that the solid Christian faith of Selene's family is the rock upon which they are standing right now, firmly holding on to each other in their love and grief, certain in the grace of their Lord Christ. It is a powerful and energetic thing to see and share, even if you don't follow that path yourself.

Please keep our family in your thoughts for the next couple of days as we lay Lela to rest.
dar512 • Oct 13, 2008 11:42 pm
I'm so sorry for your loss, Els.

Peace be to you and yours.
xoxoxoBruce • Oct 13, 2008 11:51 pm
:(
ZenGum • Oct 14, 2008 12:21 am
A moment of silence.

Condolences to you all.
Clodfobble • Oct 14, 2008 1:17 am
I'm sorry, Els. Please pass my condolences on to Selene as well.
Radar • Oct 14, 2008 2:12 am
My sincere condolences.
Sundae • Oct 14, 2008 6:52 am
Sorry to hear that Els.
Cancer is such a cruel way to die (as opposed to quietly in your sleep) but at least she left surrounded by love and with the faith that she was going to a better place. It must have eased her mind and those around her who believe the same thing.

My thoughts are with you and Selene.
Shawnee123 • Oct 14, 2008 8:40 am
When my sister-in-laws grandpa passed away, she said he was surrounded by family, and when he passed they were all standing around him, holding hands. She said as sad as it was, it was beautiful.

All we can really hope for in life is that we have touched someone, we have been loved, we have cared and been cared for. It sounds like Selene's aunt had all that, tenfold.

Please accept my sincere condolences, and know that you and Selene and your family are in my thoughts.
classicman • Oct 14, 2008 9:55 am
Peace be with you and your family during this difficult time. Remember the love and guidance she shared with all of you remains eternal.
sweetwater • Oct 14, 2008 1:42 pm
:(
I am still wearing the turquoise colored bracelet with "It whispers - so listen", a reference to ovarian cancer's typical way of progressing beyond treatment level, in memory of my SIL lost to the disease. Peace and condolences to you and your family.
Treasenuak • Oct 14, 2008 2:01 pm
My condolences, Els. You and your family are in my thoughts.
Trilby • Oct 14, 2008 2:14 pm
Death is not a period but merely a comma...

Warmest thoughts to you and yours, els.
limey • Oct 14, 2008 2:30 pm
My thoughts are with you and Selene, and the family.
Elspode • Oct 14, 2008 7:23 pm
Thanks, all my Cellar fambly. We're still awaiting word on when the funeral will be held, although it happens that it is to be at the cemetery nearest to us...where numbers of both Selene and my family are buried.

We're also still awaiting word on whether or not the eight Florida relatives will be descending on us to crash. I've just finished a furious cleaning of the most critical and hard to hide areas of the house just in case.
Sundae • Oct 14, 2008 7:29 pm
You know we're here.
Electronically, although I'm sure we all want to hug you.
But we're here.
Elspode • Oct 14, 2008 7:30 pm
I'll take all the virtual hugs I can. Just be sure to ground yourselves first to eliminate unfortunate static discharge. Or other discharges.
Nirvana • Oct 14, 2008 7:33 pm
I see you have already found joy in your memories of her! In this way she will always reside in your hearts! May you and your family find peace.
Elspode • Oct 16, 2008 7:31 pm
Aunt Lela will be interred on Saturday at noon. Its going to be a full day as there is a celebration of her life immediately following the service, but its an hour South of KC. In the grand scheme of things, this is the most important place to be, but TF is also having her housewarming that evening, so it is going to be a busy day.

Honoring the recently departed trumps helping your g/f get the place ready for the housewarming she's been planning for six months, so I won't be able to be there to help her tidy, prepare food, etc.

Thank the gods she understands.
morethanpretty • Oct 16, 2008 11:19 pm
I'm sorry for your loss, but it sounds like ya'll have a great life to celebrate. Hope everything goes well. TF is a sweetie, of course she understands, hope her housewarming goes well too.
wolf • Oct 17, 2008 2:18 am
I am very sorry for your loss of this wonderful, courageous woman.

Blessings and healing to her, and to all whose lives were touched by her.
Sundae • Oct 17, 2008 7:49 am
Elspode;494445 wrote:
Honoring the recently departed trumps helping your g/f get the place ready for the housewarming she's been planning for six months, so I won't be able to be there to help her tidy, prepare food, etc.

Thank the gods she understands.

Can I just add my compliments to Tree for being a decent and loving person?
Of course it's the right thing to do, but it must be a blow nonethless.

If she's not logging in Els, can you pass on my good wishes to her for being understanding.

Good luck for tomorrow. I hope it goes as well as these things can and you celebrate her life and continue the grieving process in a positive way.