just say NO to cootchie spam! (sorta NSFW)

Came across this little item recently: labia spreader --

notice it says "available in four spams" -- I don't like spam! Certainly not anywhere near my labias!

Also, it's "advanced and sophisticated" -- so much so I can't figure out how one would walk with it. Good thing my jewelry's too big for it, anyway--so not tempted!

I ain't got one of those but let me just say OWWWWW !!!

oh, you big baby! it only hurts for a second!

actually, no "ow" involved in that particular piece--the owies already in place.

Ok then Oww in general for all the stars , spikes , claws , and Evil looking things on that site that folks jam into /thru/ around / and under places that I would NOT think any body would want sharp or pointy things !!!

Call me a big babby if you want , but I Just DON'T GET IT !!!!!

it's okay! LOL!

the reason people do it is the same reason people style their hair, wear jewelry, etc. --it's a pretty basic human impulse to decorate one's body. That's one reason, anyway :)

But as for that particular piece . . . probably not!

Available in four spasms is more like it. I'm with Zippy, keep all sharp metallic things away from mr. happy.

I assume they meant span?
Still, the typo couldn't have occurred in a more amusing description.

I don't really want mine by metal spread right now, so I'll pass.

omg, I attracted spam!

well, no wonder . . .

Available in four chasms?

Cloud, you forgot to mention that website has a picture gallery(NSFW) :censored: .

I didn't find a spreader in the outer labia gallery (maybe I should have looked in the inner labia gallery), but I did find this (NSFW):eek:

I am so speechless I can't even think of a clever line for a caption.

JESUS CHRIST. That oughta be marked Not Safe For Anybody.

Clodfobble;464253 wrote:

JESUS CHRIST. That oughta be marked Not Safe For Anybody.

It sort of reminds me of Ghostbusters.

'Are you the Gatekeeper?'
'Are you the Keymaster?'


Let me guess. Her nickname is "Goldilocks":lol2:

If her first name was Robin, she'd be Robin of Locksley!

I am so speechless I can't even think of a clever line for a caption.

That didn't last long!

Flint;464257 wrote:

That didn't last long!

If she did it for her boyfriend Seamus, then she has the lock of the Irish!:D

Black Julia has been around for a while, and I've seen worse pictures.

Exactly why I never post my own cootchie pics.

you've GOt the big Vagina....and We don't appreciate it.






.
.




.
.



.

i saw some thing on Real Sex (HBO) a million years ago that had this old nasty lady giving a lesson under a big shade tree...with a chart of all the different types of vaginas. I remember they had names like 'butterfly' and 'wolf' and others I can't remember......did anyone else see that?

lumberjim;464274 wrote:

i saw some thing on Real Sex (HBO) a million years ago that had this old nasty lady giving a lesson under a big shade tree...with a chart of all the different types of vaginas. I remember they had names like 'butterfly' and 'wolf' and others I can't remember......did anyone else see that?

I think I remember that. It reminded me of what some people will pay money for. I was trying to figure out how much she was charging these couples for the experience.

To me it seemed like getting paid to find the shapes in clouds (no pun intended). "See that one shaped like a giant asparagus? That's an ancient and potent fertility symbol. You are truly blessed.":right:

Wonder how she walks with that in.

carefully!