Motivational Posters...
ew ew ewwwww
Whats male camel toe called?
Love that last one!!! That guy cracks me up.
The water in that creek seems awfully brown... that's not.....
She looks like she needs that pizza, poor lamb....
She looks like she needs that pizza, poor lamb....
What do you think the odds are that she actually ate that missing slice?;)
Never mind that fact that I can't imagine any woman putting a pizza box on a white couch.
What do you think the odds are that she actually ate that missing slice?;)
Never mind that fact that I can't imagine any woman putting a pizza box on a white couch.
pretty high. Now let's play "spot the barf receptacle".....
::monster adds bulimics, anorexics, naturally skinny people and pizza store owners to list of people she's pissed off on the internet::
I'd put the pizza box on the white couch. Of course it wouldn't be my white couch because I have more sense that to have a white couch. I have a pizza-colored couch. (no, I can't remember what color it was originally)
Monster, you must have kids. When ours were younger our couch had many colors too. :D
I was going to post 'Preparedness' but couldn't find a good source:headshake
how abnout a nsfw on the tits, moron?
Ah, a newbie callin' Richlevy, Dwellar of many years, a moron. This should be fun.
Get out the fireproof undies, bub. :D
Actually, the question should be, "Why aren't we posting MORE tits, moron?" Rookie mistake. You will get past it.
I have to say that if your work is going to know you looked at a pair of titties on the internet, you probably should concentrate on your work and spend less time getting paid to play. If you're looking at pictures on the net, you must surely recognize that there's going to be some that may be considered inappropriate for work. Don't blame someone else for you getting into trouble.
On the other hand, if you're just a prude, then STFU and GOOTIF!
Is the picture more NSFW than the word tits?
btw, before getting too worried about this dickhead's comment, take a look at his other 21 posts (only 19 unique, mind you). Quality stuff :rolleyes:
oooohhhh...got the dummy kuntz riled up. youll get over it.
[SIZE="7"]TITS[/SIZE]
I have to say that if your work is going to know you looked at a pair of titties on the internet, you probably should concentrate on your work and spend less time getting paid to play. If you're looking at pictures on the net, you must surely recognize that there's going to be some that may be considered inappropriate for work. Don't blame someone else for you getting into trouble.
On the other hand, if you're just a prude, then STFU and GOOTIF!
spoken like a jobless beeeatch!!!!!!!!!! Unless ho is a job:lol:
yay a use for drunken college pictures
These are fun, because they require no thought
God bless him, he kept reaching for that Nintendo...
Ironically, I think I (sort of) know that guy.
Well. I guess it's not ironic at all, really.
oooohhhh...got the dummy kuntz riled up. youll get over it.
[SIZE="7"]TITS[/SIZE]
You're too easy :lol:
Monster shoots...she scores!
Has R2D3 been banned yet? I'm just sayin'.
Oh no...poor glatt. You're such a cow jimbo.
you can't call me a cow. you dickhead.
yes I can you big girl. :)
Ali, there's PLENTY of ammo available if you want to get your own back on Glatt's behalf.... (mullets rock....)
Yeah I know, but is it really worth it? ;)
Yeah I know, but is it really worth it? ;)
Do bears shit in the woods?
I dunno. We don't have bears here. :)
Oh no...poor glatt.
I was thinking "Who
is that good looking guy?" and then I realized it was me. :D
I don't get that last one.....
Man, I hate playing catchup on threads.
how abnout a nsfw on the tits, moron?
Are you talking to me or Merc?
I figured 2 pictures of tits isn't any worse than 1 picture of tits. And if I could go back and stick a NSFW tag on the thread, I would.
Welcome to the Internet, numbnuts. Get back to work.
I'm printing out a copy of The Rules for work. It's perfect. Thanks.
you sick son of a bitch. cruel. very very cruel. my sister died when a piece of debris from the shuttle crushed the building she was in. i'm leaving.
Serves you right for inviting Uri Geller for dinner.
Oh yea, loves me some leather clad woomens.
Oh yea, loves me some leather clad woomens.
That's not leather :eyebrow::whip:
Oh yea, loves me some leather clad woomens.
Me too.... they smell like a new car. :luv:
Me too.... they smell like a new car. :luv:
Yes, but do they taste like chicken?:3eye:
Love that one Bruce - so true.
Oh I was late into this one!
Still, sometimes better to have a good few to laugh at in one sitting
Loving your posters, SG. Are you going to show your dad? Heeheee...
Too clever! I may copy the vodka one for my office.
It doesn't want to take a cropped shot, so this is the best I can do.
If someone can do better I'd appreciate it.
And if I'm asked to remove it I will of course.
Offered with love:
Sundae! You naughty girl!
:blush:
of course, I'm totally flattered and am now officially an attention whore. YAY!
Attention well earned I'm sure!
Isn't that Glenn Ford slapping that woman?
:band:
BTW, I took that pic of the snake in my back yard.
let's try this again :banghead:
Damn, I almost got to see where HLJ got his name.
That guy whistling in the back looks familiar.
We all suffer for beauty...
Amen to the knock it off! Our midwest needs a break. Some parts had the coldest winter in decades, then tornadoes, now tornadoes and floods.
But midwesterners are tough, they've been through it before, and they didn't wait for FEMA then either.
Hang in there guysNgals. the rest of us are behind you.
i don't know why but that literally makes me lol everytime i see that. thanks jimborina.
From rickrolling to badgerrolling. When will the madness stop?
Badgers? We don't need no stinkin' badgers!!
Somebody had to say it
Geee, I want a penny for every time a woman has dragged her hubby out of a pub. :yelgreedy
"The British might come back for your taxis...."
You can have my handsome cab when you pry... my fat butt outa this seat.
You can have our cabs if we can have your cab drivers.
I will admit that London cabbies are well worth having
Although you sometimes want a mute button
I think they are officially the most opinionated people in the world. I know - a couple of them drink in my pub!
I doubt our mini-cab drivers are any better than yours though
D'you Know I Had Them Girls In
The Back Of The Cab The Other Week
Sick All Over The Back Seat
I Had To Charge 'Em Double
They Ought'a Bring Back The Birch
You Know, Bring Back National Service
Bring Back Hanging! Hanging?
Hanging's Too Good For 'Em
I'm Not Prejudice Or Anything
You Know These Mini-Cab Drivers...
They've Got No Tax, No Insurance
Some Of 'Em Don't Even Have A Bleedin' Car!
Anyway John, Where Yer Wanna Go Then...
Shampoo, "Shiny Black Taxi Cab"
Help!
I have a photo of my colleagues that I want to make into to a motivational poster. But everything I've come up with is mean to the person on the left. She is also an artist and I don't want it to sound as if I'm singling her out. However I do have to mention her as she is obviously the reason for this being a comedy photo.
Any ideas?
I think the guy on right looks "funny" with the flower thing in his hair - at least she can get away with it.
Ohhh that left lol
:p
They were making "Bugs & Flowers" with children at a festival.
See - you know that, but I certainly wouldn't have just lookin at the pic ;)
Happiness is: Falling for Siamese Twins.
Conjoined Twinz is Watching You
... to the person on the left.
Sorry, do you mean the one with the extra head growing out of her arm?
"SUBTLETY - Watch where you're putting that hand, buddy"
Flower Children
Not just for the 60s anymore.
I just got 40 of these. I don't want to put them all up at once.
Here's a Cellar one for you.
I've PM'd the Mum concerned and will delete if requested.
That kid is so cute! What a great pic.
Is that directed at lookout123?
Actually it's a memorial for Lumberjim
I lost my lumberjim on 9/11, you insensitive scallywags.
Yeah, well I lost my 9/11 on lumberjim, you insensitive schlock.
Awesome picture/caption, SG!
I want to make a new sockpuppet called Limberjum. I'm just not motivated enough right now.
The caption is awesome Sundae.
OMG I have not laughed this hard since I joined the Cellar... wow. And I suppose that's what I get for catching up with a thread from beginning to end all in one day!
[/quote]
One I saw at work and had to recreate for all of you!!!
update to an oldie but goodie...
oops! that's a bit of the old accidental double meaning there.
another one refers to the kids, not the vagina! :elkgrin:
So I'll bite. How many kids does Palin have? Four? Woooooo. Bfd. No really how many?
Eh, it's five now, but I agree with your point.
Ok, I'll bite. At what point does it become a bit crazy?
Five seems like a lot to me, but then maybe that's because all I can imagine are 5 more cars in front of me during rush hour :)
My boss has five kids. He has 9 brothers and sisters and his wife has 7.
Oh...5 kids...screw her! Ha ha!!
:rolleyes:
We currently have four kids, and while things may change, at the moment I don't feel particularly done in that arena.
Ok, I'll bite. At what point does it become a bit crazy?
Five seems like a lot to me, but then maybe that's because all I can imagine are 5 more cars in front of me during rush hour :)
Ok, cool, I respect your opinion. Now tell us all your year of birth. I was born in the 60's and if you didn't have 5 kids you were not fertile enough and something must have been wrong with you for not having more. In some families they believe that a higher power makes those decisions. I respect that as much as I do a womans right to choose to have an abortion if they so choose.
Oh...5 kids...screw her! Ha ha!!
:rolleyes:
Well ok, at least we know she puts out... :D
Ok, I'll bite. At what point does it become a bit crazy?
Five seems like a lot to me, but then maybe that's because all I can imagine are 5 more cars in front of me during rush hour :)
Well, I am imagining your car in front of me right now. How about that?
That could have been funny if it was (funny) but it wasn't really funny. A few years ago I was teaching a class where two students came from really large families. One was one of 18 kids the other was one of 17 kids. Old school large. Mad props to a woman who has that kind of physical constitution to grow 18 babies. The gene pool could use more of that.
Well, I am imagining your car in front of me right now. How about that?
Are you imagining gtown using his turn signals?
Are you imagining gtown using his turn signals?
No I live in Santa Fe. Turn signals do not exist here, not even in my imagination.
:D
That could have been funny if it was (funny) but it wasn't really funny. A few years ago I was teaching a class where two students came from really large families. One was one of 18 kids the other was one of 17 kids. Old school large. Mad props to a woman who has that kind of physical constitution to grow 18 babies. The gene pool could use more of that.
Like 17 or 18 more? :eyebrow:
We don't need that, we can get all the kids we need from Mexico. :haha:
Wow, guess I touched a few nerves here. That's fine, I'm not saying I want to take away people's rights to have lots of kids as long as I have the right to be a bit surprised. I was born in 68 with one brother, and most families I've known have had 1 to 3 kids.
I come at it from the standpoint of 1) families don't need 18 kids to work the fields anymore and 2) I think most of the world's problems are caused by too many people.
That said, I'm sure all cellar-based children will be fine and upstanding citizens so breed on.
Sorry for turning a goofy thread into something serious...
18 children smacks of selfish and irresponsible, in this day and age, in my humble opinion.
May as well fill your home with 90 cats; it's a hoarding illness like that. ;)
Let the flames begin... :bolt:
I agree - The world needs a lot less humans on it - IMO.
Perhaps I should start with myself.
Ok now the discussion has changed to 18 children...This is a great way to make a point.
As we all know...5 is very different from 18...don't we? Know that?
Oh, were we to make a point? What were we talking about again? [/tailposttoasinglepostdirectlyabovemine]
;)
There once was an old woman that lived in a shoe....
Tonight we're going to have a really big shoe!
Great, I always look forward to some good plate-spinners.
Ok now the discussion has changed to 18 children...This is a great way to make a point.
As we all know...5 is very different from 18...don't we? Know that?
Yes, 5 is different from (than? to?) 18, but both are unsustainable - both result in a net increase in population. Even people that think having two children doesn't increase the population are incorrect - there are now two more people on the planet. The only real way to have kids without increasing the population is to immediately go out and kill someone as soon as the baby is born.
At least that's what I do.
I have an inexplicable urge to get a slingshot. Or a BB gun. (For the guy with the balloons.)
for the Corona or the balloons?
Heehee, I was going to ask "for the kids or the balloons" then saw he added to the post.
I was thinking the balloons. They're just begging to be punctured.
yeh - I thought so too - then I looked at it again and realized he is holdin that beer out there perfectly...:sniper:
Yes, 5 is different from (than? to?) 18, but both are unsustainable - both result in a net increase in population. Even people that think having two children doesn't increase the population are incorrect - there are now two more people on the planet. The only real way to have kids without increasing the population is to immediately go out and kill someone as soon as the baby is born.
At least that's what I do.
This has nothing to do with insulting women by calling their reproductive parts "clown cars". This is bull. I don't have any kids myslef and I was a fifth child. Thank god for number 5!!!
That original vagina/ clown car does make me laugh.
I don't think Palin's family is extreme enough to lay that on her though.
And neither do I think having a baby at 17 makes you trash. Intellectually suspect in my book, morally different, but not trash. She's going along with one of the tenets she was brought up with after all.
... She's going along with one of the tenets she was brought up with after all.
Just say yes?
I know it's just a joke, but I too don't think Palin and her family are trash. I don't think having a child at a young age makes you trash. It happens. Teenagers have urges. Some follow through. Some pregnancies occur.
I remember them, the urges, not the pregnancies! :p
My beefs with Palin are beefs with her, not with her family. In fact, she has some cute girls there, and they may be very nice people.
Remember how they slaughtered poor Chelsea? That was just wrong wrong wrong.
Maybe she likes babies. Maybe she likes sex too. oooh, white trash. So yea. The judgements are sexually based, proving my point. Sexism is a-ok now....Now that someone you don't like obviously does the dirty deed, it's not ok....I think she should spread her legs all she damn well pleases, and she obviously is making an attempt at taking care of all 5 if she's a fucking governor. I'm no Pialin fan, but I'm getting sick of these sexually based attacks. You are no better than Pailin for engaging in that activity.
They are certainly better than....
I have a problem with that stance too, Cicero. When Palin first hit the news there was something about her hair. I was like "who gives a flying rat's ass about her hair? What's SHE about?"
Turns out I don't like her politics.
But look how they painted Hillary: a cold fish bitch who would just as soon cut your dick off than listen to you. That's sexism too.
I'm sure women in public office are prepared that it's going to happen, but it doesn't make it right. We've come a long way, baby, but we've so far to go.
Is this a good spot to once again remind everyone that women didn't get the vote until 1920, 50 years after the 15th amendment asserted the following: The right of citizens of the United States to vote shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or by any State on account of race, color, or previous condition of servitude.
Women are still scorned, subjugated, and disrespected. We have oh so far to go. :(
Wow, apologies again for derailing this fine thread.
However, I don't see where the sexism comes from. It takes two to make a clown car and the husband is in each motivational poster. They can have all the sex they want, the poster is talking about how many children is too many (and apparently the cellar has determined it's somewhere between 5 and 18 :) ).
And at the end of the day, it's all In Someone's Honest Opinion so I defer to the water balloon poster...
At least they were accurate with respect to Hillary.
[SIZE="5"]JUST KIDDING[/SIZE]
I agree with cicero and shawnee. and that the marital and up-the-duff status of her daughter have nothing to do with her ability to be VP. Her actions/statements may make her a bit of a hypocrite, but not much -her daughter's old enough to make up her own mind and you can only shape your children's futures and choices to a certain extent. And while we're at it, white trash is racist.
Now can we get back to the funny stuff?
You're not derailing and there is no need to apologize. You have opened up a discussion on what is fair in the political arena.
I don't give a shit about the clown car poster. I was talking about the Palin poster.
I think 18 kids is some kind of illness, trying to fill a hole, or keep your hole from being empty: or religious fanaticism. I don't find it admirable. I find it selfish and misguided. By the way, those clown car people are posers: they'd need 4 MORE kids to make it to 18.
That is a big difference from 5 kids, imho. Crack welfare hobags excepted (and I mean those who have kids to get more bennies then don't take care of the kids) 5 kids probably means you love children. Nothing wrong with that.
But 18? I was raised Catholic. I get the concept. I know we don't live in biblical times anymore and I know you can't make kids slave in the fields all day anymore.
And you've made the dried up old bat hillary references before, cm.
You know how I can tell it's white trash?
Look at the husband.
LOOK.
You want your wife in the White House? Learn to shave, ya rummy.
S123 - You know I couldn' resist and it is all in jest anyway. You lobbed that softball right over the plate.
Bri - right on target!
Oh it's hip to be sexist again. As illustrated by Maher and even Stewart....Why are you guys any different. You want to be "hip" don't you?
I didn't mean to derail the thread with this discussion, but I am treating it like I treat the puppy. Say something right when it happens. Don't chastise later. If you are going to act like dogs, get treated like one.
There. Done. *sigh*
The attitudes are not limited to the internet, as I have to hear this kind of stuff out of people's mouths and I just get frustrated. If it's truly in jest it's funny. Unfortunately, lately, it has been neither. (funny or purely in jest)
Actually I'm beginning to think I'd rather have :gulp: her than Obama.
There - I said it. Now I'll go and deny it ever happened.
By the way, those clown car people are posers: they'd need 4 MORE kids to make it to 18.
That's an older photo of that particular family (last name Dugger if you want to look them up); they currently have 18 children and a new television show on TLC.
I hear their social bookmarking website is quite successful as well.
Wow, guess I touched a few nerves here. That's fine, I'm not saying I want to take away people's rights to have lots of kids as long as I have the right to be a bit surprised. I was born in 68 with one brother, and most families I've known have had 1 to 3 kids.
I come at it from the standpoint of 1) families don't need 18 kids to work the fields anymore and 2) I think most of the world's problems are caused by too many people.
That said, I'm sure all cellar-based children will be fine and upstanding citizens so breed on.
Sorry for turning a goofy thread into something serious...
Dude, you never said anything about a family of 18 kids. You attacked a family of what? 5? Take your licks and move on. You are still welcome here.
Personally I feel that 18 kids is an extreme choice , what every happened to zero population growth, and would be insanely hard, also bad for one's health.
So more fuel
That's an older photo of that particular family (last name Dugger if you want to look them up); they currently have 18 children and a new television show on TLC.
What should the Duggars name baby #18? Cast your vote
From
here.
Jesus H Christ in a handbag. :headshake
What should the Duggars name their new baby if it's a boy?
Jacob
Jordan
Joel
Jarred
Jefferson
Jack
I don't see Jesus H Christ in a handbag as one of the choices here. ;)
I gotta ask - what does this guy do to support that many people?
Are we all somehow paying for this insanity?
I think it is utterly irresponsible to have that many kids.
It is disrespectful to the earth.
According to Clodfobble, they have a TV show on TLC. So if you buy the advertised products, you are supporting them.
Edit: And if you clicked the link in Shawnee's post, you saw advertising that helps support them.
Well, back before they had a series, and instead just a one-hour special about building their massive new home themselves out in the middle of nowhere (at which point they only had 17 or maybe even 16 kids)... they revealed that the guy was a real estate agent, and they lived in a very modest three-bedroom house, and their biggest expenditure was $500 a week on food. She makes a lot of their clothing. One problem with living in a house that small: not everyone got to take a shower every day, because there just wasn't time.
[size=1]Please note that I'm really not obsessed with this family, I just remember useless crap I see on TV really well.[/size]
Only $500 a week on food? For 18 people? Wow! that's impressive.
Only $500 a week on food? For 18 people? Wow! that's impressive.
Three quartermasters, a German, a Russian, and an American are discussing the caloric allotment for their respective troops. The Russian says "We give each troop 2500 calories a day!" The German sneers and says "we give each troop 3500 Calories a day." The American just laughs and says "Each of our boys gets 5500 calories a day."
The Russian says "Bullshit. No one could possibly eat that many potatoes in a single day"
Isn't there a saying, "Two can live as cheaply as one"? So, 18 can live as cheaply as 9, and so on.
My weekly budget for 3 is $150.
When there's 4 of us at home, we'll easily spend over $250/week.
their biggest expenditure was $500 a week on food.
I dunno - they must be getting some assistance somewhere. If $500 is there biggest expenditure and they can feed 18 on it, then I am doing something seriously wrong.
their biggest expenditure was $500 a week on food.
I dunno - they must be getting some assistance somewhere. If $500 is there biggest expenditure and they can feed 18 on it, then I am doing something seriously wrong.
We just added up and we spent $500 last month to feed 5, so we could feed 20 on their budget -probably more as we could buy in bigger bulk.
How do you all spend so much? it's not like we live on Ramen Noodles and candy. We do cook everything from scratch, though, and we only buy a few "organic" products. Our bill would be much reduced if we grew more of our own veg too.
/hijack
I dunno - they must be getting some assistance somewhere. If $500 is there biggest expenditure and they can feed 18 on it, then I am doing something seriously wrong.
They got crazy wholesale deals, I'm sure you can imagine. I think they said at one point the (already cheapass quality) ground beef worked out to $1/pound because they bought in bulk. They also indicated they ate a whole lot of frozen burritos (the kind that are like 30 cents each and have zero nutritional value.)
Edit to add: we typically spend about $500 a month for 3.5 people, plus another 2 on the weekends.
so, we just worked out we spend the same per month on sports and leisure fees (i.e. not including any equipment or equipment maintenance). Guess we know where our priorities lie!
we typically spend about $500 a month for 3.5 people, plus another 2 on the weekends.
We just added up and we spent $500 last month to feed 5./hijack
Ok - help me out here. I'm just a dumb guy and all. But you both spend the same as them to feed 10 less people than them. How are you gonna feed ther addition 10 for ZERO extra? That makes no sense.
They spend $500 per week, not $500 per month.
:lol: sorry, i'm a math nerd, i should have spelled it out more
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Awww, you made my day! :blush:
Oh come on.. I'm sure it's happened at least once.
The ultimate motivational poster...
Oh come on.. I'm sure it's happened at least once.
Do you speak from personal experience?:eyebrow:
Do you speak from personal experience?:eyebrow:
Certainly not... As I've said before, I've never used the Evil Weed. Not to metnion. . . .
Well, anyway, it just seems highly improbably that it never happened. I'd go as far as to say there are probably very very few useful or desirable things out there that HAVEN'T been traded for a blowjob.
:lol: @ camoflauge!!!! Want! Want!
[ATTACH]20612[/ATTACH]
Love the kaleidocat!
Love that birdie, Nirvana. You can almost see the defeat in his "shoulders."
I laughed till I peed...
Impress, please post pictures like that in one of the NSFW threads, not here.
I suggest the WTF NSFW thread. It would go nicely there.
Glatt, are you sure you mean Impress?
She hasn't posted in this thread for a while...
The mods moved it. (Thanks Mods.)
impress is a she?
I don't know, but I like the name. I always think of Empress...there I go...off to never-never land...wheeeeeeee!
I couldn't resist.
Best use of an old Genesis concert pic evah!
impress is a she?
Yes, and she's posted pics of herself in the RFN thread I do believe.
I am most definitely a she. The moniker is my first and middle initials and my last name.
[ATTACH]21372[/ATTACH]
[ATTACH]21373[/ATTACH]
color me impressed.
is that also you with the wild kid in the back seat of the car?
is that also you with the wild kid in the back seat of the car?
No. The only kids in my life are the 20 snotmonsters who call me their first grade teacher.
[Van Halen] I'm hot for teacher! [/Van Halen]
you have a nice smile, impress
I took the quote from Tiki's tagline. Thanks Tiki.
CANADA??????
I hope that is part of the joke.
yes, yes it is. I live in Calgary Alberta. I know what canada looks like on a map, and that is clearly Hungaria
yes, yes it is. I live in Calgary Alberta. I know what canada looks like on a map, and that is clearly Hungaria
Nonsense, I am from Szekesfehervar, Hungary, which is 70 km from Budapest. I know the map of Hungary and that ain't it.
It is Australia, isn't it?
It's spelled "Austria." A lot of people make that mistake.
Not for long though.
Less people locked in cellars and worse beer...
Don't bullshit me, it's not Austria, it's Australia. But what's that got to do with Canada? Should this be in the FAIL thread?
Nope, definitely not Australia. I think it's New Zealand.
Ahh, go stick ya head in a map of Tasmania!
:p [COLOR="Wheat"] hey no hard feelins Bruce.[/COLOR]
~facepalm~ The joke is that the poster says it's Canada... Where I live... thus poking fun at peoples general bad geographical knowledge.
I've seen the anti-immigration posters for Australia many times, but I was wondering if it was an inside joke between Australia and Canada, that I wasn't aware of. The geography challenged works, thanks.
I tried to find it on you tube but struck out, but, there is a TV commedy skit where the comedian (?Michael Moore?) is interviewing people on the street in the USA. He asks them their opinion of North Korea, and then asks them to find it on the map he has, which has been altered so that Tasmania is marked as South Korea and mainland Australia is North Korea.
Various comments :"I never realized North Korea was so much bigger than South Korea..."
I so wanted to find that, and insist the map was N.K. Oh well, sigh.
Try looking for "Rick Mercer: Talking to Americans" He's a Canadian comedian who walks around asking people in the states ridiculous questions about Canada to film their idiocy. I was so embarassed for my homeland the first time I saw that. I immigrated to Canada from Ohio after I married a Canadian
I immigrated to Canada from Ohio after I married a Canadian
Half my father's family settled in Hamilton, Ontario, but I need a passport to visit them.:(
I still think he's cute :)
Sundae Girl
Finding inappropriate images attractive since 1972
AppalachianTrail or AgentinianTail.
All I can think is what sugarpop said in another thread, and I'm paraphrasing I think, "these guys didn't get laid in high school." :lol:
Try looking for "Rick Mercer: Talking to Americans" He's a Canadian comedian who walks around asking people in the states ridiculous questions about Canada to film their idiocy.
Here's a link to that Rick Mercer episode.
http://www.tiny.cc/mercerDammit, Spud.
23 million... and one.
"I like them french-fried potaters, ayup!"
[QUOTE=diminished;582406]
This is nothing short of brilliant. Pulitzer material, IMHFO.
Yea, but he did win the Noble Peace Prize!
Spode I love that one. Thanks. :D [/savedit]
I will just leave these here
Zippy, that is a C-17 isn't it?
Great pic btw. Ahhhhh... memories.
How exactly are they sitting? It looks like it might end up straining their back a bit.
Pubic Hare is priceless!
They're not sitting, that's the line for the bathroom. ;)
Sitting on equipment and leaning against parachute, heavy ruck (backpack)is on the front. My ruck when I jumped weighed 120 pounds, you can barely walk.
Im Not really sure What plane that is Merc
It has to be a C-17. I have jumped out of 141's and 130's among a host of others, I just remember the C-17 to be more huge, maybe they are more huge in the front and that is near the tail.
C-17, C-18, whatever it takes.
The old style seats, Like in the whoopass poster, seated 102 troops.
The new palletized seats will handle 189 troops and still be able to empty the plane in under 50 seconds. I should think they'd have to shed their parachutes and packs to do that, though.:eyebrow:
Regarding Bling-boy, if that is real gold and he bought it more than a year ago, that is not poor fiscal responsibility but a brilliant investment.
Is there a bathroom on that cargo plane? Or just a hole in the floor?
One victory at a time allows you to conserve precious bodily fluid reserves... in case you're presented with an unexpected groupie.
You know, "Let's walk down there and do them all". :elkgrin:
I like the sperm Nike logo.
Finish it.
That's great. Very funny.
HA HA HA - Thats really good!
:lol:
Didn't those medals just look like bent tin lids? I bet they just hooked the ribbon through the ring pull.
Bastids.
I am glad they won. They have done little else of success in history. We can give them that much.
It's an ugly medal anyway. I bet it tarnishes in no time.
According to Lil' Pete's old coach silver tarnishes much worse... could be he is still pissed after 60 years though.
Hey Merc, ever wonder why there are so few movies about WW1??? Because by the time the US got involved, Canada already had the war mostly won. I'm not trying to start anything, i have a unique view of both sides of this issue, As a transplanted Canadian myself, I married a Canadian and am eagerly waiting for my citizenship test.
As for the other side, i was born in Youngstown, OH and served in the US Army from 1995 to 2001.
As a transplanted Canadian myself, I married a Canadian and am eagerly waiting for my citizenship test.
So do you have to become nicer before you can take the test or does Canadian citizenship grant you niceness?
eh?
:D
Well, I get slapped by my wife for all of my Canadian jokes Such as:
How do you spell it???
C eh N eh D eh
How do you keep Canadian bacon from curling in the frying pan???
Take away it's little broom.
Why are there so many French people in Quebec?
During WW2 that is where they all stopped running.
And when she hits me I can't hit her back as she is currently 8+ months pregnant.
But in truth I love it here, I already apologize too much and tend towards the polite side most of the time.
Makes it fun to be a security guard, though. most people don't see a veteran when they look at me, and I tend to use that to my advantage.
How do you keep Canadian bacon from curling in the frying pan???
Take away it's little broom.
.
:lol: :::snort:::
How do you keep Canadian bacon from curling in the frying pan???
Take away it's little broom
HA HA HA !!!
Never heard that one before .
Classic !!!!!!!
Wow, this seemed like one of our epic threads. Hard to believe it hasn't had a post in 4 months.
The lady that parked this car was about 175 years old, from what I could see today at the hardware store.
might have been better had they printed it in Spanish....
Sad.
Sounds a lot like "
sundown towns"
I don't see it that way at all. They were here legally. That was a situation born out of ignorance and racism. This situation, to me anyway, nothing to do with either.
But municipal laws at that time made the blacks illegal also.
Great post Impress! I hope that is the real deal. :thumb:
might have been better had they printed it in Spanish....
:lol: Very true.
But municipal laws at that time made the blacks illegal also.
Municipal law isn't involved. Constitutional law is.
NOT. THE. POLITICS. FORUM. KTHXBAI.
This wouldn't be as funny in spanish as most Americans couldn't read it and most people who could wouldn't find it funny.
Saw this and couldn't resist:
[ATTACH]29126[/ATTACH]
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Yeah. And they felt really bad about it. So they changed the name to just "The Y".
That's very good, splode :lol:
That is pretty wild spode.
That was a situation born out of ignorance and racism. This situation, to me anyway, nothing to do with either.
No there is plenty of ignorance and racism on the anti-immigrant front
NOT. THE. POLITICS. FORUM. KTHXBAI.
No there is plenty of ignorance and racism on the anti-immigrant front
Then post a new friggin poster monnie!
FINE! I'll do it myself then.....
If these are repeats ... Tough turds - blame her.
And a cry came from the great white north....
Who is that chap?
Is he a golfer?
Also from demotivational, one for Spudcon:
His name is Justin Bieber, he is the current androgynous teen boy sensation. He is holding (I believe) the Stanley Cup, which is the annual championship trophy in pro hockey. No clue why he got to touch it.
thanks Clod - I had no idea who the geeky kid was.
Now that I know, I totally agree.
He is holding (I believe) the Stanley Cup, which is the annual championship trophy in pro hockey. No clue why he got to touch it.
Hope he used hand sanitizer afterward, based on what I've heard has been in that cup.
I think it's the other way around. Gods only know where Justin Bieber has been.
Thank you Sundae. Glad to see the potato conspiracy is being recognized in the United Kingdom also.
Who told you about the potato conspiracy. There is no potato conspiracy go back to your prescription drugs, TV, and sex.
Not really motivational in the typical context, but what the heck....
[COLOR="LemonChiffon"].[/COLOR]
Inspired by
Zippy's eggs...
[COLOR="LemonChiffon"].[/COLOR]
Why d'ya think the Entwives left?
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[COLOR="LemonChiffon"]?[/COLOR]
[COLOR="LemonChiffon"],[/COLOR]
Ahhhhhhhhh. I love me a bit of George Takei!
He was on I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here and was charming, polite and very funny. He had a lovely bromance with the eventual winner (Joe Swash), but it was obvious he adored his partner (now husband).
i loved his little cameo in The Big Bang Theory, appearing in the fantasy of one of the guys.
When he does the Stern show every few months (radio, ye Brits), George Takei is always a great addition because his personality is absolutely genuine and likable.
i loved his little cameo in The Big Bang Theory, appearing in the fantasy of one of the guys.
I caught that, too. Loved it.
Also loved his "You're A Douchebag" PSA on YouTube.
George Takei is always a great addition because his personality is absolutely genuine and likable.
Yes! That's exactly what came across in
I'm A Celebrity. No-one can fake it 24/7, and there's no point in trying when the cameras are on, because your campmates will mention it anyway.
Note - Celeb US seems to be a lot more brutal than Celeb UK.
Ours is hosted by Geordie pair (and national treasures) Ant and Dec. Their pieces to camera - gentle but cheeky humour - make it one of the few programmes that all three of us watch together.
Of course I win, because I was into it before Mum, and Mum couldn't get Dad interested until I came down one weekend and our united front made him watch it form behind the newspaper. After which he converted, completely.
He thought it was like Big Brother, which he still denounces as absolute shit, without havning watched an episode. However he has a point there - I'm just a dirty addict when it comes to that programme.
As you were.
It's okay.
Teh sharks are eating their feet
"If you go and get your feet gnawed off, don't come runnin' to me!"
"If you go and get your feet gnawed off, don't come runnin' to me, Adolf!"
FIFY
Which totally gives new meaning to Adolph's Meat Tenderizer.
That's not meat tenderizer.
This is meat tenderizer.
This'll make your meat soft. Fast.
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Awwww, he's just a baby! Aint that cute!
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Russians.
Not motivational, as such, but still a good reminder. I wasn't sure where to put this.
Missed that Welfare one Classic.
Hmmmmm.
When I was on it I preferred to think "Paid into society in case I one day needed help".
Turns out I did.
Same as giving blood (which I do twice a year) and volunteering for Save the Children and The British Heart Foundation and giving pretty much anything that's legal to the MacMillan Cancer fund rather than having it go into landfill.
I'm no saint and I can't give money.
But I do what I can.
Welfare is there for when good people need it.
Theft is a crime.
Missed that Welfare one Classic.
Hmmmmm.
When I was on it I preferred to think "Paid into society in case I one day needed help".
Turns out I did.
Same as giving blood (which I do twice a year) and volunteering for Save the Children and The British Heart Foundation and giving pretty much anything that's legal to the MacMillan Cancer fund rather than having it go into landfill.
I'm no saint and I can't give money.
But I do what I can.
Welfare is there for when good people need it.
Theft is a crime.
Well said.
Sorry guys/gals. I don't even remember posting that. I look at it now and I'm still surprised. I really see nothing about it that I like.
I larfed. I still larf at it.
LOL. Howdy Brutus, long time no see.
Unfortunately in this day and age, so true on one hand and so necessary on the other.
I had to Google Bella Swan.
I had no idea.
then again, I'm aged. :)
Unfortunately in this day and age, so true on one hand and so necessary on the other.
*blinks*
Are you saying welfare is a necessary evil?
*blinks*
Are you saying welfare is a necessary evil?
Unfortunately yes, I have always thought that. And, unfortunately, I see the daily abuses of it where I work. A person driving a brand new car, with freshly done nails, and a I-Phone don't need to be on welfare. I see it EVERYDAY.
I get the Bella Swan thing.
But why was the sandwich so damaging to feminism?
I'll explain in a minute. But, for now, why don't you go get me a sandwich?
iron my shirt, bitch! (NOT YOU SUNDAE)
iron my shirt, bitch! (NOT YOU SUNDAE)
Ok! Ok! keep your shirt on!!
I had to Google Bella Swan.
I had no idea.
I like you more for this.
Wow. Two full moons *and* a sunset. What planet is she on?
don't know if this is a repost but if it is? meh! me likes it!!
She appears to have been naughty.
She appears to have been naughty.
spank her then! (if you're in to that sorta thing! :D)
spank her then! (if you're in to that sorta thing! :D)
I. Would. Spank. Dat. Ass.
Bootie-licious!!Philthyism #69.1 - trust me on this one. Don't EVER masturbate after slicing up fresh jalepeno peppers!
That brings tears just thinking 'bout it.:sniff:
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but how can you be homeless when you live in a pineapple house under the sea?
I'd love it if someone drew eyes on that mattress.
:lol: It really does look like a sponge.
One I created from a screen shot from The Walking Dead. Great show!
[SIZE="5"]NEW SEASON STARTS OCTOBER 16 !!![/SIZE]
Wasn't sure where to put this so fuggit here it is.
Throwing a lil reality check in here. This one really got to me.
Is that another way of saying, "At least you don't have a spindly monkey paw for a hand"?
I know. It's a real photo - and a famous one.
But the caption is a little too preachy for me, in a thread which generally mocks such.
I tried to introduce some levity.
Oh, you are so going to hell.
(bad time to tell the cornflake joke ya think?)
@ Classic: love the church sign.
I'll corn your flake young lady!
Sorry Sundae - That image really got to me. I wasn't expecting that response at all.
...
Totally orphaned a really funny one. :rolleyes:
Sorry Sundae - That image really got to me. I wasn't expecting that response at all.
I did miss your comment, otherwise I would not have been so flippant.
Totally orphaned a really funny one. :rolleyes:
Damn, I didn't actually see that.
The Christian Right mebbe? Teh pill is teh wrong, make moar babies through confusion?
Orphan.
Snicker.
Is that another way of saying, "At least you don't have a spindly monkey paw for a hand"?
I chortled.
<~~~ (going to hell with Sundae)
Wasn't sure where to put this so fuggit here it is.
Love it.
I chortled.
<~~~ (going to hell with Sundae)
Nah, I'm an old fashioned gal.
I'm going to Tartarus.
but how can you be homeless when you live in a pineapple house under the sea?
I'd love it if someone drew eyes on that mattress.
spongebum drunkpants
[SIZE="5"]NEW SEASON STARTS OCTOBER 16 !!![/SIZE]
You betcha...can't wait.
I just got the first season on DVD for my b-day (by "just"...I mean back in July). We are going to watch the first season again so we are all primed up for the second.
spongebum drunkpants
eh hem eh hem
eh hem you say? EH HEM????!!! YOU SAY!>?!11/??
That's not even SpongeBob.
That's a black homeless guy.
FAKE.
I think we're jumping to the Homeless Conclusion. Maybe it's just a normal everyday businessman who like to relax by wrapping himself up in a big giant piece of foam, on his lunch break. He may or may not be nekked under there. That's what I most want to know.
Come back, come back from the Island of Conclusions...
I think we're jumping to the Homeless Conclusion. Maybe it's just a normal everyday businessman who like to relax by wrapping himself up in a big giant piece of foam, on his lunch break.
IM, that is very PC of you and may I also add very not racist. How, indeed, DO we know that that isn't some normal everyday businessman unwinding from a hellish day at work? We don't know! He very well could be!
shame on all of you who went the drunk/homeless route!
We can't even be 100% sure he's a black guy! He could be Irish for all we know! Let's take a peek at his wang, just to be sure...
*peeks*
HELLO!
He ain't Asian, I can tell you that.
(oh, sorry...was that wasis?)
I know an Irish man when I see one.
The man is black.
Although I admit I jumped to conclusions re homeless.
He may just have been very sleepy. Or a fetishist.
All I can say is either way I don't want to date him.
Hang on.
Let me just take a peek at his wang.
When you see it, you will shit!
:lol:
EWWWWWWWWW!
Not looking then.
Has he got spiders up his spongee wang?
It is a specimen more suited to Kings and Noblemen than to Spongeguys in the middle of the Street, let me tell you.
eh hem you say? EH HEM????!!! YOU SAY!>?!11/??
ooo snap!
yeah, I was all, like, wtf eh hem?
Ya fukker - Good one. I didn't even notice
Not really a demotivator, but...
no, that's definately a de-motivator...
Gonna go off and slip a noose round m'neck. Ciao for now...
Am I betraying my HUGE ignorance here... I don't know who that chap is.
That's George Carlin. He was a funny and insightful stand up comic and is a guy that gets lots of quotes falsely attributed to him. So many, that at this point, I assume everything I see attributed to him is done so falsely.
Oh yes, I know him from his quotes, and from Snopes :)
Never knew what the chap looked like though.
Ta.
This is what he looked like when he first started out. "Class Clown" is a hilarious album. Especially so to anyone brought up Catholic.
It's been uploaded to you tube.[YOUTUBE]nWW4HwGVJYM[/YOUTUBE]
Famous for the 7 words you can never say on TV.
[YOUTUBE]3_Nrp7cj_tM[/YOUTUBE]
That's George Carlin. He was a funny and insightful stand up comic and is a guy that gets lots of quotes falsely attributed to him. So many, that at this point, I assume everything I see attributed to him is done so falsely.
Like Jesus, eh?
"... God, it's not the smell so much..."
BWAAAAAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Like Jesus, eh?
Oh no you di'n't!
My first exposure to Carlin was an eight-track tape I got for my birthday, I was like ten-twelve. "Occupation: Foole" warped my fragile little mind.
No. The gifters did not know who Carlin was.
This poster is freakin hilarious, but I'm not sure of the etiquette involved. If I hotlink, I'm stealing someones bandwidth. If I download and upload a copy, I'm infringing on an implied copyright.
So I'll just link. Trust me.;) This will be going up in my cube at work.
http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=2533820754834&set=a.1040470062000.2007675.1533007418&type=1&ref=nf
Cubeworthy.
Awww, Rich!
Don't be making me sad for the bad guys!
Merc - doesn't work for me.
Try pizza.
And beer.
Never understood the diamond thing.
High end super duper techno geekery...now that's another story.
Never understood the diamond thing.
Really? Hell, I'd spread
my cheeks for a big enough diamond.:yelgreedy
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Wrong thread, pls to forgives...
I read recently that 25% of US children are undernourished.
A few days earlier I read that 30% of US children are overweight.
Now, we all know it is not that simple, but the solution does seem bloody obvious.
EAT THE FAT KID!
I know that was a joke, but what is really whack is that obese kids are presenting with rickets. Obese and malnourished.
Very true. Too much cheap, high-carb, low nutrition food.
Still, eating the fat kids would, you know, thin out the herd. Darwinism and all that.
:bolt:
No fucking way--I only eat humanely-raised meat.
Thin out the herd is what I heard...
That kid is way too old to be in a stroller. Now wonder she's that fat. Or am I judging without knowledge? Maybe she's quadraplegic? or maybe she just never tried to walk and her parents didn't see the point either....
[YOUTUBE]u9s7afoYI-M&start=80s[/YOUTUBE]
Very true. Too much cheap, high-carb, low nutrition food.
Still, eating the fat kids would, you know, thin out the herd. Darwinism and all that.
:bolt:
No way I'm eating that...unless they're free-range children. I think confining them to a stroller so they don't get all muscular and tough is cruel. Just like my ex used to say about veal.
No way I'm eating that...unless they're free-range children. I think confining them to a stroller so they don't get all muscular and tough is cruel. Just like my ex used to say about veal.
I guess you're the type who likes to hunt his own, eh?
OMG you hit the nail on the head! It's a GM soylent green production project
I guess you're the type who likes to hunt his own, eh?
Nah...never been a hunter. I like mine pre-packaged.
An optimist sees the glass as half-full.
A pessimist sees the glass as half-empty.
I'm a realist. I see the glass, and think: "I'm gonna have to wash that glass."
I'm and optimist. I see the glass and think "I hope that's beer and it's for me".
No, you're an optician.
You see the glass and then ask yourself, is it clearer like this, or like this?
Number one? Or number two? Number one? Or number two?
someone doing the pee pee dance in this thread?
Number one? Or number two? Number one? Or number two?
someone doing the pee pee dance in this thread?
Do we need an Utterly Pointless Clodfobble's Indecisive Excretory System thread?
an optimist looks at that glass and thinks, that glass is half full
a pessimist looks at that glass and things, that glass is half empty
an engineer looks at that glass and thinks, that glass is over-engineered for that load
A chemist looks at that glass and thinks, since it's not in a vacuum, that glass is full.
A biologist sees at least 4 habitats. (air, water, glass surface in air and glass surface in water).
(edit: fifth=water surface in air. sixth=glass surface at water-air interface.)
A psychologist wonders how that glass reminds you of your mother.
An alcoholic looks at the glass and wonders who's buying the next round already.
An astronomer looks at it and says: "It all came from a comet."
I look at that glass and say, "this is the motivational poster thread. get your own fucking thread, you threadjacking glass, you!"
Did you notice the double helix spirals of water drops ?
.
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That is Lil' Griff's work. :)
lol
That makes it a lolphin.
OMFG!!!!! classic! asshole! i just spewed my beer on pic #1! :lol2:
best i can come up with on such short notice......
I like "She has curves in places other women don't even have places."
Guess I'm just an average kind of guy.
That's an awesome picture. I like that all three look really sexy. The one on the right looks the best though.
I'd be interested to know what nation's sizes they are. the one on the right looks more like a size 14 to me.
I'd say the same. And wonder what their heights are.
At size 8 I'm a lot bonier than Tillie.
People were worried about me when I was a size 10.
My ideal size now would be 16.
I think that would make me look normal.
Not turn-heads-in-the-street, just enough to feel good about myself.
And no, it wouldn't be perfect, but I am never going to be as slim as you Dani, and there is not point in wishing it.
Next year.
I have to hit it before I'm 40 or I never will.
All three look lovely though. I find it hard to believe many men would kick Caroline out of bed for being two sizes too big.
I would pour honey all over Caroline and spend 4 hours removing it.
Then I would go hiking with Tillie and tumble her under a Tent Pine
and lastly I would punch Anna in the ovaries. I don't like her attitude.
Caroline, Tillie, in that order. Anna don't got no shape. Might be a bad angle.
That back groove, though.
Even as a woman, I want to cover it in something sticky and lick it off.
I think they're called reflex curves
I think they're called reflex curves
Right. From the reaction she has when jim punches her in the ovaries.
Anna looks less attractive than Caroline, but it is a bad angle. Looks like she has more gut than her, too.
Funny that the men's most desired shot is posed for the rear.
Those are US sizes, Dana.
Alternate tag to Epic Booty:
Flossing. You're doing it wrong.
Next year.
I have to hit it before I'm 40 or I never will.
Not true. But it has self-fulfilling-prophesy potential. Why give yourself that handicap? I've lost 15lb since I turned 40.
And I've lost 40 pounds since I turned 50.
There is no such thing as "too old". For anything.
And I've lost 40 pounds since I turned 50.
There is no such thing as "too old". For anything.
havin' babies.......... :eek:
anyway you count it up...i'll take 'em all. then ask for seconds!
Guess I'm just an average kind of guy.
BRUCE!!!!!! You told me you dont like big boobs?????????
BRUCE!!!!!! You told me you dont like big boobs?????????
They be average, Duckie, average. Actually, "boobs" and "don't like", don't belong in the same sentence... ever.
After turning 40, I lost 90 lbs. Then I found them again.:mad2:
Actually, "boobs" and "don't like", don't belong in the same sentence... ever.
I'm BigV and I endorse this statement.
That's actually just an anti-theft device.
The Indians are attacking! Form the wagons into a circle!
But sir, we don't have any wagons!
Improvise!
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Only if you're an American.
Otherwise it's all about arse.
A rose by any other name..
Jesus.
Show me something more beautiful than that.
I dispute the first one (about heroes).
But there is no real answer to the latter.
Except that as Dani says - that's an arse. And what an arse.
What an arse indeed.
I'd cross the street and take a bus to Hebden for that :p
I'm slipping on my comfortable shoes as I post.
hahahahahahah
[I actually did one of those harumphing snorty laughs then. Really tickled me]
A fortnight to go.
Please cum.
Yukyukyuk and all that.
I like the Xmas one - that would make a good card.
Guess I'm just an average kind of guy.
I've never understood the supposed appeal of a skinny, bony ass. The parts of a woman that make her sexually attractive are strategically located deposits of fat, i.e. boobs, ass, hips, thighs. Nature, our evolutionary programming, tells us that a woman healthy enough to carry fatty deposits in these key areas is a good candidate for carrying our offspring and successfully forwarding our genetic code. This is science, you can't deny that a big fat ass or pair of boobs is what is supposed to turn on a normally functioning male adult.
The world is so ƒucked up in so many ways, but the ubiquitous "ideal" of super-skinny females is something that I can't even begin to understand.
I thought about this as I watched Atonement. Keria Knightley is a pretty woman, but she's so thin. And I thought about how so many guys like a woman with some meat on their bones...yet there I sat wishing I was as skinny as Keira. Or even on the same planet.
So what is up with that? Well, it speaks to men's ideals vs women's ideals, but it doesn't get to the heart of the dichotomy, which is the root of eating disorders. Can't blame the men on this one. It's female, and it's bad and insidious marketing.
I think there *might* be an explanation in the following:
*disclaimer* human behaviour may be affected by genetic factors but it is very flexible and malleable, both by environmental/social factors and self-imposed decisions. It is very unlikely to be "hard wired", except maybe for the heartbeat, and maybe not even that. I'll use the term "programed to" but what I really mean is "born with a tendency to behave generally like this".*
It would make sense for male humans to be programed to want a nice, healthily padded female as a breeding partner. What Flint said.
But! ideally, she should also be just ending puberty. That way she will be a breeder/mother for many years and also probably isn't already breeding with someone else.
A female of the ideal breeding body shape will be somewhat lean at the end of puberty, but voluptuous in the right places. She will fill out as she lives.
So what males are programed to find attractive is that curvaceous youngish female who is still a little slender in places.
Yet, as time goes by, life and motherhood have their consequences, and she is still curvaceous, but no longer has the youthful sparkle, and the slenderness has long gone. Males lose interest (the shallow pigs).
I hazard the guess that this is the source of modern women's urge to look young and of just the right body shape. Society and especially business (beauty industry) run with this and it grows beyond all sense or reason. It has pushed beyond the natural ideal to an even younger, thinner appearance. Hence the current obsession with thinness.
*Important disclaimer* This is all written focusing only on humans as creatures with biological urges. We have become far more than that. We do things for reasons, not urges, we have culture and knowledge, our societies have developed rules of behaviour. Anyone who lives by the rule of "Indulge biological urges whenever they arise (aka penis does what penis wants)" is falling well below the standards of being a "person". It is this reasoned behaviour according to social conventions that makes someone a "person" and gives them greater rights and moral worth than,say, a cow. IMHO.
So, chaps, just because your genes make you want to go and chase buxom young college chicks, doesn't make it necessarily okay to do so. But there's no need to hate yourself for having the urge.
So, chaps, just because your genes make you want to go and chase buxom young college chicks, doesn't make it necessarily okay to do so. But there's no need to hate yourself for having the urge.
IF you teach at university. Otherwise, let the old man lechery begin!
Right, right: the disclaimer that this is, of course, purely objective scientific observation. Don't anybody have a P.C. freak-out on me.
ZG, I get that a thinner female would be perceived as younger, therefore healthier (in terms of an ancient hunter-gatherer culture where age 30 must have been considered elderly), therefore this younger-looking female would be perceived as more likely to be capable of producing our offspring. And as you say, the physique filled out in the right places would indicate that she is ready for breeding, while the thinner build might indicate she is younger, thus less likely to be otherwise spoken for.
Unfortunately the implications of this would be that the biologically ideal woman for breeding is of an age that is not considered leagally or ethically appropriate in our modern culture. Luckily, as you mention, humans have enough gray matter in our frontal lobes to mitigate our primal instincts with the very useful and complex abstractions that make "society" possible.
All of this being said, it still doesn't speak to my original point: that there is a pervasive idea in our culture that a woman who has the physique of a 10 year-old boy is supposed to be the ideal of sexual attractiveness.
This doesn't make sense to me via evolutionary biology or any other means I can think of.
All of this being said, it still doesn't speak to my original point: that there is a pervasive idea in our culture that a woman who has the physique of a 10 year-old boy is supposed to be the ideal of sexual attractiveness.
I believe, and certainly others can correct me, but " Rubenesque" was the standard for attractive and mating long before the starving look became popular. In other words the idea that skinny is sexy is really an evolutionary new thing, and it may be a cultural white European thing as well. There are other cultures in the US that find "Fat is Phat". Just an observation.
All of this being said, it still doesn't speak to my original point: that there is a pervasive idea in our culture that a woman who has the physique of a 10 year-old boy is supposed to be the ideal of sexual attractiveness.
This doesn't make sense to me via evolutionary biology or any other means I can think of.
I heartily agree. The protruding ribs look is (a) unhealthy and (b) unattractive. What we have today has gone way beyond any evolutionary sense.
I think to explain this, we'd be looking at some kind of game theory, involving the ratcheting up of expectations and pushing an increasingly impossible ideal...'cause, like, if women felt comfortable as they are, they wouldn't need to buy all that overpriced crap from cosmetics companies, who wouldn't be able to afford those hugely expensive adds in the magazines which tell women they are fat and ugly, so the magazines have to keep telling them this ...
I will sum up with two musical quotes:
Do not read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.
I like! big! butts! and I cannot lie ...
Sexual maturity is what the instinct is, a positive hip to waist ratio and some sign of breastage is the "signal". 10-year-old boys are Right Out.
Bone is for the dog....MEAT is for the man!
I like skinny chicks. Especially if they like big fat guys.
What?
the bigger the cushion the better the push'in.
Save the whales, harpoon a fat chick.
Ride her like a surfer riding on a tidal wave.
And he was a good father anyway. What a guy.
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I'm late to the party (as usual. I really must try to stay up later) --
Re: the skinny woman ideal = 10 year old boy. Homoeroticism, anyone?
I've also found that men with tiny dicks like their women to be very, very petite. Makes their dicks look bigger by comparison and very petite girls are often very young and incredibly stupid. Men love that.
and I could weigh 85 pounds and still have no hip to waist ratio. My body type is an H. When we get fat we become O's.
My body type is an H. When we get fat we become O's
Careful Bri, some might misinterpret the labels during the intermediate stage.
Yeah.
That's the point.
Ya 'ho.
;)
Bri, we get the right group of us together and we'll spell OHIO. ;)
What's round at one end, round at the other and high in the middle?
Brianna, Dana, and, Infi flanked by two round things
petite girls are often very young and incredibly stupid. Men love that.
I don't.
i never knew the latest in eugenics proved weight & height are linked to intelligence... does it apply to guys too? is this common knowledge? maybe i should wear a t-shirt saying "look at this belly, let's have smart kids!" next time i go out partying? ;)
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Should have said, "Angry Birds"
This ones for Gravdigr
Thank you, sir.:yum:
Remember we had that recent conversation about what kind of female body shape it would make evolutionary sense for male humans to find attractive?
That's her right there.
Now for something completely different:
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Love the attempted murder one
WTF is this?
Synchronized crow balance beam?
^^crow bar^^
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crow-bar
cold blooded murder
That's a twofer right there!
This is the stormtrooper I'm looking for.
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WTF is this?
Synchronized crow balance beam?
A group of crows is referred to as a "murder of crows" thus the two crows not forming a group is an attempted murder of crows.
And then I laughed.
...and his nuts were never seen again.
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That is so true. Oh man, the time I got all my friends to joust with bamboo poles while riding our stingrays. It was excellent until first blood. Then, not such a good idea.
I remember the big boys at number 11 carrying my screaming sister home after a spill from her bike. You could still see her blood on the pavement the next day.
The funny thing is that the kids who did that stuff in the 70s are the same exact people who are over protective of their own kids today. Weird.
True dat.
My sister never let hers out of her sight when they were younger - it was all arranged play-dates at her house. We pretty much ran wild when we were younger.
Also we were farmed off to our Grandparents for long stretches of the school holidays. Okay it was necessary because of Mum & Dad's shift patterns, but she has stayed in part time work purely so that she is available all through the school holidays.
Nothing wrong with that, they can obviously afford it. But I wonder what they will do when A goes off to Uni in a year and a half. I have a suspicion that my sister will change jobs in order to earn more money to support her. It has always been about her, rather than my nephew.
Oh man, the time I got all my friends to joust with bamboo poles while riding our stingrays. It was excellent until first blood. Then, not such a good idea.
Like !!!
Or the BB gun wars , How quick would a swat team show up if there was a dozen kids running around with rifles and pistols shooting at each other now days , Not to mention the wrist rocket /cherry bomb artillery !!!
I remember at 6....6! leaving the house on a Saturday morning before my parents were awake and going to play at the construction site. I'd come home for lunch or to poop..... but then pweeer... gone again.
great times.
In theory i asn't supposed to go beyon the street when i was 6...
In reality I spent a very large portion of my early childhood roaming the park up th road, or building dens in th 'chicky factory' which was a derelict old mill converted into a meat processing factory for a few years and then abandoned.
In the grounds there was a old air raid shelter. The kind that went underground. perfect den! And the collapsed bit of roof made a great secret doorway.
I was sort of part of th ever-changing, numbers shiftin, tribe of youngsters of varying ages who roamed about the place.
I recall on one of several occasions no doubt, trying to convince mum that I hadn't been to the chikcy factory, and failing on account of being completely covered in black dust.
[eta] often accompanied by Shep, the border collie cross who lived across the street from me, and whose owner used to let out before he left for work, and then shout in for tea when he got back. *shrugs* he was a dog. he needed his freedom. It was the 70s.
Classic - a classic.
I had to look twice.
I'd say TG rather than TV, but lets not talk about that.
Even moreso because you can tell they're in a hotel. Hundreds of people are having sex all around them!
I thought it was a condo since there was a table cloth.
Not sure if you have to be funny in this thread or not but the girl looks so cool, I had to post this. Wish she'd have more muscles and less bones showing though. :p:
Not sure if you have to be funny in this thread or not but the girl looks so [Strike]cool[/Strike] hot...
FIFY.
.
Not to sure about that, I think was just arrested with 1 pound of pot, so I guess that could change shortly.
:eek:
Not to sure about that, I think was just arrested with 1 pound of pot, so I guess that could change shortly.
Snoop Dogg has a medical prescription for cannabis in California, his home state, but that doesn't fly in Texas. The rapper was arrested over the weekend after a drug-sniffing police dog found less than half an ounce of marijuana in a waste basket, according to reports.
OH well...
dear kids.....
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eh= so not such a big deal....
Good on him.
dear kids.....
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Why do you hate people from New Zealand. Racist!
It's only racist if you hate people from Nuw Zulund.
(Thor has mastered WordArt. there is no hope for any of his work. None.)
Yeah. Everybody likes to pick on comic sans. But the truth is that it's a perfectly fine font - for some uses. Not so much for others. The same could be said of Palatino and the rest.
australian sunrise....... :lol:
Not as thrilled with the text, but I do like the image.
Not to sure about that, I think was just arrested with 1 pound of pot, so I guess that could change shortly.
I thought you wrote you thought
you were just arrested and I thought,
"wow, you have to be unbelievably high to be unsure if you've just been arrested."
you have to be unbelievably high to be unsure if you've just been arrested."
I thought that was bad cop with no evidence act #1 -make them think they're under arrest
Not as thrilled with the text, but I do like the image.
In a way, I'm glad the text is as trite as it is.
Because the photo is about a man helping a team member.
It shouldn't be any more touching than an NFL or Premier League player doing the same.
The fact these men are amputees shouldn't be more important than the fact they are accomplished athletes. Otherwise it's downright patronising.
I do like the shot without the captions though.
Because all the above notwithstanding, there is an added drama due to the prosthetics.
Remember, Santa Claus is watching you!
In a way, I'm glad the text is as trite as it is.
Because the photo is about a man helping a team member.
It shouldn't be any more touching than an NFL or Premier League player doing the same.
The fact these men are amputees shouldn't be more important than the fact they are accomplished athletes. Otherwise it's downright patronising.
I do like the shot without the captions though.
Because all the above notwithstanding, there is an added drama due to the prosthetics.
:eyebrow: I was referring to the God part.
Remember, Santa Claus is watching you!
Not likely.
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That's so nice of those young men to help Santa cross the street like that.
Santa vs The Storm Troopers. A new episode of Star Wars 3D.
:lol2:
After raising a teenage son, that poster sure brought back memories.
AAAAhhhahahahahahahah~!!!!
I always heard them called gazongas,
and Yeah, I noticed them.
where? i don't see godzilla! gazongas yeah! no godzilla.
Dude. I'm not currently at work but those images wouldn't be SFW if I were. ;)
ah yeah. didn't think about that...
Well, there's no motivational posters NSFW thread, so you can either start one or post in some of the NSFW threads. Sorry to bring it up. I think a motivational NSFW would be a good thread. :)
alright then.....this will work here. since, i. um. used. to. work. um. there???
:lol:
Do you know that guy? :)
i know a few juuuuust like him
You've obviously never driven in Alaska.
Mom&Popdigr returned from a vacation road trip to New England/Maine several yrs ago talking about the signs at every county line: "XX People Killed Since Jan 1 in Moose/Car Collisions."
They said these signs were very common.
Jabba the Hutt is right next to him!
Sign. One more soldier encased in carbonite.
What are they teaching during basic training these days?
Hmm, when you put it that way.
lol, RAPE is so FUNNY!!!11!11!one
lol, RAPE is so FUNNY!!!11!11!one
Yeah, I was all :vomitblu:
Do you think that sign was made to amuse? No, it was made to frighten.
Do you think that sign was made to amuse? No, it was made to frighten.
No, the poster was made to amuse. It doesn't.
Who goes to prison for shoplifting?
Who goes to prison for shoplifting?
That's offensive to the thousands of hardened (bwaahahaaa) criminals out there who are working every single day of the week trying to make it into a maximum security penitentiary.
Who goes to prison for shoplifting?
In Calif, three time offenders.
lol, RAPE is so FUNNY!!!11!11!one
Yeah, I was all :vomitblu:
You two totally need to get over yourselves. You're so busy being righteous about your gender rights and sufferings and all that shit your bodies are so desperate your knees are jerking off.
For a start amusing/frightening/whatever -the point is to catch your attention with the message. That worked.
Secondly -who mentioned rape? maybe in your drama queen horror fantasies. I admit I'm female and I have never been in prison, but I have read several prison blogs/journals etc, and whilst I understand that rape happens, the general impression I get is that people get so lonely and desparate, they agree to do things they wouldn't normally. The buttsex is often consensual -even for people who wouldn't do that before..... I could be wrong. I'm sure you could not.
You two totally need to get over yourselves. You're so busy being righteous about your gender rights and sufferings and all that shit your bodies are so desperate your knees are jerking off.
For a start amusing/frightening/whatever -the point is to catch your attention with the message. That worked.
I SOOO fully Agree !!!!!!!
You two totally need to get over yourselves. You're so busy being righteous about your gender rights and sufferings and all that shit your bodies are so desperate your knees are jerking off.
For a start amusing/frightening/whatever -the point is to catch your attention with the message. That worked.
Secondly -who mentioned rape? maybe in your drama queen horror fantasies. I admit I'm female and I have never been in prison, but I have read several prison blogs/journals etc, and whilst I understand that rape happens, the general impression I get is that people get so lonely and desparate, they agree to do things they wouldn't normally. The buttsex is often consensual -even for people who wouldn't do that before..... I could be wrong. I'm sure you could not.
It wouldn't be being used to shock/scare/grab attention if it wasn't implying rape. Since when is it justifiable for someone to be raped for a petty crime anyway? The poster was tasteless and made me feel ill. I'm sorry but implying you should be raped for any crime whatsoever does not sit well with me. Its not justice and its sickening. There is no way this was implying consensual sex or it wouldn't be being portrayed as a punishment. Prison rape jokes are thought to be funny as a norm, but if this was a joke about raping a woman for wearing a short skirt, everyone here would be crying foul. Neither joke is good or funny. Don't let your double standards show.
Got to admit, I saw it and thought it was a joke about prison rape, which I personally found really distasteful (the joke...I have never experienced prison rape:p).
Certainly some of the stuff I've read/seen suggests that prison rape is a major problem. The figures are horrifying and that's with a broadly accepted low reporting rate.
In popular culture prison rape is a common source for humour. From the scene in a comedy where the hero gets locked in the county jail with a big bloke called Bubba, to standup comedians making jokes about baggy assholes.
That's what the poster was playing to. A common joke about the risks of prison.
Rape is still considered amusing when it relates to men. In and out of prison. Our culture (brit and yank) sees humour in a man being made feminine.
There is also a strand within popular culture (again, brit and yank i think) that takes a kind of grim delight in the additional punishment that represents. How many times have people suggested it serves them right if some nasty violent criminal gets his comeuppance in a cell with a burly cellmate? |Pretty much every time there's a pedophilia case, family murder case, rape case...etc.
It is in our culture. And that poster plays to that cultural understanding. It is a nonsense to suggest otherwise.
That said, there's plenty of jokes and posters in here I find offensive for a variety of reasons. Likewise there are some I find funny, that no doubt cross somebody else's line. It's always a risk when you put something out into the fray. Sometimes it's worth having the argument, sometimes it isn't.
It's also worth bearing in mind, the notion of morgue humour. Which, I'd say, the Cellar has in spades. Sometimes what is being laughed at isn't being laughed at because the reality is funny. But because it is so horrible that it crosses into a different kind of humour.
I think it's kind of unfair to get stuck into two of the most vulnerable members of this community over two very short responses to a picture they didn't find amusing (or motivational).
A bit OTT if you ask me, and I know you didn't, but I'm telling you anyway.
eta: and you're probably all very well aware of my opinion of rape as a tool for humour.
The prison rape topic is timely.
Yesterday, Obama ordered a bunch of new regulations designed to reduce prison rape. Federal funding will be cut for any prisons that don't comply.
The Justice department also came out with statistics yesterday that 1 in 10 local and state prisoners is raped at least once while incarcerated.
Maybe one of those assholes was a Texan asshole. Everything's bigger in Texas.
I'm sorry, I just couldn't help it.:sweat:
I'm in KY remember...I gotta make fun of the other states when I get the chance. I don't get many...
:biggrinba
Maybe one of those assholes was a Texan asshole. Everything's bigger in Texas.
...
Now that was fucking funny.
Maybe one of those assholes was a Texan asshole. Everything's bigger in Texas.
I'm sorry, I just couldn't help it.:sweat:
I'm in KY remember...I gotta make fun of the other states when I get the chance. I don't get many...
Yep, only logical that you would think of assholes seing as you're deep in KY.
that was a good one co-pilot grav...
i never saw it here. they have the safe prison act and if you get caught raping someone in a texas prison you might as well hang it up cuz your ass is going to belong to the state for a vvvvery long time. not to mention the beating they'd get for doing so. i for one never saw or heard of anyone getting the banana up teh tailpipe but i did hear of and almost see "straight dudes" buying blow jobs from punks. their IQ is so low that they rationalize getting a blow job isn't gay if your not giving it. W.T.F.? yyyeah. no.
Sooooooo, back to humour.....
How did the farmer find his sheep in the long grass?
Ans: [COLOR="LemonChiffon"]Very satisfying[/COLOR].
Hey, jokes about having sex with sheep are offensive!
Listen here boy, I said try counting sheep to help you get to sleep ... not mounting sheep!
Ewe might think you're witty, but you got mutton on me.
snip--
I'm in KY remember...I gotta make fun of the other states when I get the chance. I don't get many...
Well, here's one for you:
Did you know that the toothbrush was invented in Kentucky?
Yep. Because had it been invented anywhere else, it would have been called the teethbrush.
Yesterday, Obama ordered a bunch of new regulations designed to reduce prison rape. Federal funding will be cut for any prisons that don't comply.
Shameless shilling for the federally incarcerated vote.
;)
Ewe might think you're witty, but you got mutton on me.
Ewe had better be careful or he'll carve you up quicker than the Sunday roast!
Ewe might think you're witty, but you got mutton on me.
There are shades of graze in this matter, but most people got mutton on you in the wit department. I wool look pasture lesser atttempts to equal you because I don't want to take sheep shots.
Meh, you're all baananas.
that was a good one co-pilot grav...
I really was hoping you, Clod, & MTP (seems like someone else here I like is in Texas, BrianR maybe?) wouldn't take too much offense at that.
Yesterday,[/URL] Obama ordered a bunch of new regulations designed to reduce prison rape. Federal funding will be cut for any prisons that don't comply.
Oh, I am sure that will be effective and decreasing prison rape.... not.
Lessee now...what was this thread about again?
Oh, yeah, I member now:
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Thread save!
But the poster is incorrect.
When was the last time you saw a hot chick with no man anywhere nearby that you could see?
(If you're Grav and you're online, probably about three minutes ago, right? ;) )
She's not alone.
Ninja boyfriend.
Thread save!
But the poster is incorrect.
When was the last time you saw a hot chick with no man anywhere nearby that you could see?
(If you're Grav and you're online, probably about three minutes ago, right? ;) )
She's not alone.
Ninja boyfriend.
That is so obvioulsy the right answer--why didn't I think of that?
If it had been a ninjaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Yep. Grandmas rock.
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"My grandmothers have both passed away," she deadpanned.
Too soon?
Nah, one was soon after my birth and the other was a bitch.
She said, a shade sadly.
Is anyone else sick to death of puns?
I hate going back over previous posts, but I thought those were Tom Swifties, he said reproachingly
They are Tom Swifties, she replied quickly.
Thanks for the confirmation, he said smugly
"My grandmothers have both passed away," she deadpanned.
Too soon?
To lose one grandmother, Inif, may be regarded as a misfortune; to lose both looks like carelessness.
:lol:
(Disclaimer: I miss all my grandparents and I think all four would find this a very funny conversation.)
YUP. welcome to sixth grade civics you dumb fuck.
The Constitution of The United States is a serious impediment to Jesus bringing Right and Truth to the world. Yup, gonna have to fix that.
Awwww, leave him be! :P
He got fat because he did his back in really bad. And he's only mid-60s.
Bet he could still charm his way into girl's pants though...
He probably forgot to bring the duct tape from home. ;)
Awwww, leave him be! :P
He got fat because he did his back in really bad. And he's only mid-60s.
Bet he could still charm his way into girl's pants though...
Oooooo somebody has a crush on MacGyver!
More a crush on Jack O'Neil, really :p
Oooooo somebody has a crush on MacGyver!
:lol2:
you may say O'neil, but we know! :p:
Alas MacGyver wasn't big over here. I don't even know if it ever showed, I never saw it.
I've seen a couple of clips on the tube. I'm pretty sure if I had seen it I'd have a crush :p
Love the actor.
on my hiatus from society i was known as Macgyver.
Dana, I like the older Richard Dean Anderson, too.
Not motivational, but relevant.
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"Strong is the new skinny" --I love it. That is awesome.
I saw a girl wearing a "Strong is the new skinny" tank top. She was firm and solid and it was totally working for her.
i like both of those a lot.
Well, on that topic ... this is a GIF and kinda NSFW so I'll just post the link:
http://senorgif.memebase.com/2011/09/29/funny-gifs-working-those-abs/
Any guy here reckon they could spend a night with this woman and not be in rehab for a month afterwards?
We still would, though, wouldn't we?
Maybe GIF lady was doing impressive crunches, and maybe she wasn't. She could have gotten up on that punching bag and then slowly let her body go back until she was upside down, and then stopped, and got off. Then in the computer, you run the images backwards to make it look like she did a crunch, and then loop it to make it look like she did a lot.
She's in better shape than I am, so there are no criticisms here from me, even getting up on the punching bag and letting herself lean back slowly requires pretty good strength.
Pfft! Big deal. Her ankles are crossed. Let's see her do that with just adductors.
We still would, though, wouldn't we?
Happily.
Maybe GIF lady was doing impressive crunches, and maybe she wasn't. She could have gotten up on that punching bag and then slowly let her body go back until she was upside down, and then stopped, and got off. Then in the computer, you run the images backwards to make it look like she did a crunch, and then loop it to make it look like she did a lot.
She's in better shape than I am, so there are no criticisms here from me, even getting up on the punching bag and letting herself lean back slowly requires pretty good strength.
It's definitely backwards looped. Look at her hair go the wrong way.
you're right. It gets magically sucked in towards the back of her neck as she's going up.
she'd still kick any of our asses
Pfft! Big deal. Her ankles are crossed. Let's see her do that with just adductors.
What do you mean with just adductors? That move is very doable. That gif doesnt look fake at all. It does look looped, like she only did one rep and not many reps. I would brag how I can easily do ab crunches upside down but then again, that was like 20 years ago. :lol: Heck, I'm inclined to train my abs just to show-off but I'm feeling lazy these days...LOL.
I mean she is locked onto the bag. The abs are just a diversion. Can her legs hold her onto that bag w/o her crossing her ankles?
It's nice that it says proof right there on the pic!
Win.
photographic proof. what more do we need?
Awesome! I can't wait for Tommy Boy 2.
Hahaha. I really like that last one.
Story of my life.
Although, I usually don't collapse. It's just too much trouble getting back up. I just go straight to the sobbing.
That has to be a Barney Stinson quote.
*google google*
Oh yeah, it is!
As Bad As A Mile
Watching the shied core
Striking the basket, skidding across the floor,
Shows less and less of luck, and more and more
Of failure spreading back up the arm
Earlier and earlier, the unraised hand calm,
The apple unbitten in the palm.
Philip Larkin
(the old funster)
That has to be a Barney Stinson quote.
*google google*
Oh yeah, it is!
Somehow that eluded my radar...good catch. Don't care much for the rest of the cast/show, but I do love Barney.
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In other news: Australian cars now fitted with windscreen vipers.
Zen, that's worth a double Groan
:D
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Love the barbie doll one lol
Inf, those last two are dark. Like black night dark.
Maybe Infi is posting for HQ ?
