He was pissed

busterb • Jan 8, 2008 6:42 pm
NORRISTOWN, Pa. (AP) - A western Pennsylvania man who mailed a bloody cow's head to his wife's lover has been sentenced to probation and community service.
SteveDallas • Jan 8, 2008 8:53 pm
What is the crime? I mean, seriously, is there a law against mailing animal part to people?
monster • Jan 8, 2008 9:09 pm
Apparently.

"Dead animals or parts of animals"

Page 17:

http://www.usps.com/cpim/ftp/pubs/pub52.pdf
Griff • Jan 8, 2008 9:11 pm
So in Western PA you have to give a dowry when you're cuckolded?
Aliantha • Jan 8, 2008 9:47 pm
The poor cow.

I think he's been watching too many gangster movies. srsly.
wolf • Jan 8, 2008 11:44 pm
I am surprised that I knew nothing of this.

I found an msnbc article, but it doesn't list the names of the recipients.
busterb • Jan 9, 2008 9:11 am
Wolf. Story here http://apnews.myway.com//article/20080109/D8U22FMO0.html
classicman • Jan 9, 2008 9:20 am
AP Story
The victim received a package containing a cow's head with a puncture wound in its skull on June 1, 2006.
Jason Michael Fife "understands that in a civilized society a person cannot send a severed cow's head to anybody," said his defense lawyer, Henry Hilles

Fife and his wife, who have a young child, later reconciled, Hilles said.
.
binky • Jan 9, 2008 10:03 am
:rolleyes: she must have been overcome by the romance
Cloud • Jan 9, 2008 10:06 am
wait . . . they got back together?!!
ZenGum • Jan 9, 2008 10:24 am
[advertising voiceover] A severed cow's head. Because sometimes flowers just aren't enough. [/voiceover]
Shawnee123 • Jan 9, 2008 11:22 am
Cloud;422784 wrote:
wait . . . they got back together?!!


Oh for pete's sake. Maybe it's my lack of perseverance that keeps me from a successful relationship...dude mails me a cow head and I'm out of there.

msnbc wrote:
Fife, 31, of Hunker, was sentenced Friday to a program for first-time offenders in which he must complete two years of probation and 50 hours of community service. If he successfully finishes the program, his record will be cleared.

Fife and his wife, who have a young child, later reconciled, Hilles said
.

Judge: Mr Fife, is this the first time you've mailed an animal's cranium to a spouse?

Fife: Yes sir.

Judge: OK, you're sentenced to 50 hours of picking trash out of the ditch. Court is adjourned.

Mrs Fife: I love you, you cowhead sending freakazoid.

Mr Fife: I love you too, you cheating witch.

Baby Fife: I don't stand a chance. :headshake
lookout123 • Jan 9, 2008 11:33 am
strangely enough our long lost dwellar cowhead made an appearance yesterday.
ZenGum • Jan 9, 2008 11:37 am
lookout123;422805 wrote:
strangely enough our long lost dwellar cowhead made an appearance yesterday.


:lol2:
That is very very weird. Thanks for noticing, and pointing it out.
Spexxvet • Jan 9, 2008 11:53 am
What do expect from a guy from HUNKER?
shina • Jan 9, 2008 12:41 pm
She reconciled with the guy?!:eyebrow:

Yep, there sure are some crazies in the world.
binky • Jan 9, 2008 1:13 pm
Funny how the crazies always manage to find each other:lovers: :eyebrow:
Shawnee123 • Jan 9, 2008 1:45 pm
There's someone for everyone...even animal part mailing sorts.

Ain't love grand? ;)
classicman • Jan 9, 2008 4:44 pm
:lol2: @s123
DanaC • Jan 9, 2008 5:16 pm
Yeah...nothing says love like a dead head.

The thought "shit, this guy really is fucking crazy, I don't want him anywhere near our son' didn't cross her mind then?
TheMercenary • Jan 9, 2008 6:10 pm
If he was pissed was he drunk as well?
Cicero • Jan 9, 2008 6:11 pm
Well I guess there are some crazies out there..I thought it was pretty mild compared to beating the hell out of the guy or shooting them both in bed...these things happen. Call me crazy (not that you don't already).....In fact, I think one of my friends left a dead bird on someone's (a cheater ex) doorstep once...a black bird if I remember right. I shrug at that...really.

Well- I came out of a Far Side comic strip I'm sure...so don't listen to me!!
:)
Clodfobble • Jan 9, 2008 7:29 pm
And besides, he sent it to her lover, not to her. No need to woo her if her only other option gets scared off.
Griff • Jan 9, 2008 7:56 pm
[COLOR="White"][inside]Is it a problem that I sort of admire the creativity and intensity of the thing?[/voice][/COLOR]
Spexxvet • Jan 9, 2008 7:58 pm
Griff;422993 wrote:
[COLOR="White"][inside]Is it a problem that I sort of admire the creativity and intensity of the thing?[/voice][/COLOR]


[COLOR="White"]No[/COLOR]
Griff • Jan 9, 2008 8:01 pm
[COLOR="White"]Thanks[/COLOR]
Aliantha • Jan 9, 2008 8:07 pm
[COLOR="White"]weirdos[/COLOR]
Griff • Jan 9, 2008 8:10 pm
[COLOR="White"]You're off my cowhead list.[/COLOR]
Aliantha • Jan 9, 2008 8:12 pm
[COLOR="White"]excellent[/COLOR]
monster • Jan 9, 2008 8:55 pm
[COLOR="White"]you're probably still on his non-species-specific head list, tho'[/COLOR]
ZenGum • Jan 9, 2008 9:57 pm
:lol: at all you invisible inkers.

If a cow's head will win back your ex's love ... what do you reckon you could get if you sent someone a whale penis? 'cause I know this really hot chick that I don't know how to approach ... should I try it?
Aliantha • Jan 9, 2008 10:26 pm
If it's someone from this site that you've got your eye on, you should definitely do it. ;)
HungLikeJesus • Jan 9, 2008 11:02 pm
Those of you saying he was crazy are ignoring the fact that it worked.
Shawnee123 • Jan 10, 2008 9:40 am
And he got his prize back: a woman so understanding that the mailing of a cow's head is of little consequence in the long term ups and down that any relationship will experience.

Excuse me, I need a tissue.

[COLOR="White"]The invisi-posts were the funniest things in a long time![/COLOR]
binky • Jan 10, 2008 9:57 am
aint love grand, shawnee?
Shawnee123 • Jan 10, 2008 9:59 am
lol...I wouldn't know. (Hey, does the Cow Head Correspondent make good money?)
Shawnee123 • Jan 10, 2008 10:00 am
ZenGum;423033 wrote:
:lol: at all you invisible inkers.

If a cow's head will win back your ex's love ... what do you reckon you could get if you sent someone a whale penis? 'cause I know this really hot chick that I don't know how to approach ... should I try it?


Awww shucks, Zen...I would be honored to receive your, errr, whale penis. Oh, you didn't mean me? :blush:

:bolt:
Spexxvet • Jan 10, 2008 11:10 am
SteveDallas;422660 wrote:
What is the crime? I mean, seriously, is there a law against mailing animal part to people?


monster;422662 wrote:
Apparently.

"Dead animals or parts of animals"

Page 17:

http://www.usps.com/cpim/ftp/pubs/pub52.pdf


He should have used UPS. And maybe cooked it, first:

The "Montgomery Inn Experience" is so special that we take great effort to get it to you fast and fresh. Out entire line of products are carefully packages in order to deliver it to you overnight. Bottles of Montgomery Inn Barbecue Sauce are shipped via ground transit (unless otherwise specified) becuase they are non-perishable.


He just should have sent Cow Tails. Naw - wouldn't have carried the same message...
BigV • Jan 10, 2008 3:53 pm
HungLikeJesus;423041 wrote:
Those of you saying he was crazy are ignoring the fact that it worked.


If by "it" you mean their continued marriage. I would say that "it" worked either despite or because of the cowhead.... we can't say.
HungLikeJesus • Jan 11, 2008 12:44 am
Maybe he meant it as a partial dowry.
ZenGum • Jan 11, 2008 3:44 am
HungLikeJesus;423420 wrote:
Maybe he meant it as a partial dowry.


But really it was a partial cow-ry.

Their love had gone cold, in fact it was friesian, but this has steered them back together. Udderwise, the relationship was pasture its time.
Trilby • Jan 11, 2008 4:04 am
ZenGum;423438 wrote:
But really it was a partial cow-ry.

Their love had gone cold, in fact it was friesian, but this has steered them back together. Udderwise, the relationship was pasture its time.


and now my day is complete.
Sundae • Jan 11, 2008 7:53 am
I considered sending half a pig's head to my love rival once.
I was walking round a meat market and the little piggies heads really made me laugh. They weren't that expensive either. She'd been very rude about me the week before and it struck me as a funny way to get even.

What can I say, I didn't do it in the end.
TheMercenary • Jan 11, 2008 9:23 am
Sundae Girl;423461 wrote:
I considered sending half a pig's head to my love rival once.
I was walking round a meat market and the little piggies heads really made me laugh. They weren't that expensive either. She'd been very rude about me the week before and it struck me as a funny way to get even.

What can I say, I didn't do it in the end.

Chicken?
DanaC • Jan 11, 2008 2:28 pm
I gotta say...last time I saw a pig's head at a butchers it damn near turned me veggie again.
Shawnee123 • Jan 11, 2008 3:00 pm
TheMercenary;423488 wrote:
Chicken?


Noooooooo, she said pig's head.
Drax • Jan 11, 2008 4:41 pm
Aliantha;422672 wrote:
The poor cow.

I think he's been watching too many gangster movies. srsly.


or Godfather a gillion times. (http://www.usefultrivia.com/movie_trivia/the_godfather_trivia_003b.html)
monster • Jan 11, 2008 8:37 pm
Are there other gangster movies famous for severed heads she could have been referring to? :rolleyes:
ZenGum • Jan 11, 2008 9:26 pm
Could be we're missing something here, people.

[ATTACH]16504[/ATTACH]
monster • Jan 11, 2008 9:30 pm
Save's picking it, I suppose?
Aliantha • Jan 11, 2008 11:58 pm
cows are so lucky
monster • Jan 12, 2008 1:31 am
apologies for the apostrophe in there -the gremlins did it!
Urbane Guerrilla • Jan 12, 2008 2:20 am
DanaC;423641 wrote:
I gotta say...last time I saw a pig's head at a butchers it damn near turned me veggie again.


Scary sort of Lord Of The Flies vibe to turn a corner and suddenly come upon. :eek:
xoxoxoBruce • Jan 12, 2008 4:42 pm
Godfather?
richlevy • Jan 12, 2008 5:01 pm
monster;422662 wrote:
Apparently.

"Dead animals or parts of animals"

Page 17:

http://www.usps.com/cpim/ftp/pubs/pub52.pdf
Damn, I wish someone had shown me this before I became a Secret Santa.:lol2:
Griff • Jan 12, 2008 5:18 pm
:LOL:
ZenGum • Jan 14, 2008 4:03 am
Maybe the message he was trying to convey was "give me head, cow!".

This video features a cow doing something ... strange ....
The site is NSFW but the video itself is safe.