Things To Ponder

Drax • Nov 20, 2007 1:04 am
Why do you often see a shoe lying on the side of the street?
Crimson Ghost • Nov 20, 2007 1:33 am
It's from a hitch-hiker who got picked up too fast.
NoBoxes • Nov 20, 2007 3:44 am
Because it would be shoeicide to lie in the middle of the street?
DanaC • Nov 20, 2007 8:21 am
Oof. NB that was a vicious pun
LJ • Nov 20, 2007 9:25 am
that's where they land when they fall from airplanes.
ZenGum • Nov 20, 2007 9:40 am
Crimson Ghost;408882 wrote:
It's from a hitch-hiker who got picked up too fast.


The driver said "hop in".
lookout123 • Nov 20, 2007 9:46 am
if sheep can mosey around in the rain, why do i have to dry clean my wool pants?
LJ • Nov 20, 2007 10:11 am
what does cheese say when it gets it's picture taken?
Cloud • Nov 20, 2007 10:50 am
I wanna know why you see shoes hanging from power lines.
glatt • Nov 20, 2007 11:08 am
It's the fuckin' hooligans, I tell you.
Shawnee123 • Nov 20, 2007 11:10 am
Cloud;408969 wrote:
I wanna know why you see shoes hanging from power lines.


I wonder that too. I used to think it was a Wag the Dog homage, but now I don't think so. Anyone know?
Cloud • Nov 20, 2007 11:17 am
a cheap alternative to weights on the line? Imagine the power company going to Goodwill and buying a bunch of used shoes.

probably just dumb kids though
Razzmatazz13 • Nov 20, 2007 2:20 pm
My stepdad wrote a song about lonely shoes like that.

It's probably my favoritest song, evar.
Drax • Nov 20, 2007 2:24 pm
LJ;408942 wrote:
what does cheese say when it gets it's picture taken?


Huuman! :D
Andoria • Nov 20, 2007 2:24 pm
(insert montage of the Devil explaining to Joan of Arc how the sword could have ended up in the field for her to find)

:)
DanaC • Nov 20, 2007 2:24 pm
The driver said "hop in".


Ouch.
Drax • Nov 20, 2007 2:25 pm
Does the little mermaid wear an algaebra?
DanaC • Nov 20, 2007 2:26 pm
lol
JuancoRocks • Nov 20, 2007 11:09 pm
Cloud;408969 wrote:
I wanna know why you see shoes hanging from power lines.


Multiple reasons...The most common is explanation is that drugs are sold nearby (Crack, heroin...take your pick...it's advertising.)

Second is that someone has died there and that it's a memorial....

Third, somebody graduated from school....or military basic training

All are listed as possible wacky urban legends...as it happens in rural areas as well as in the cities.
Cloud • Nov 20, 2007 11:27 pm
drugs are sold nearby? Nearby being a relative word, I think that's pretty much everywhere. Interesting, though.

so strange . . a little netsurfing shows a lot of these reasons. But have you ever done it? or known someone who has flung shoes?
Shawnee123 • Nov 21, 2007 9:12 am
Cloud;409177 wrote:
drugs are sold nearby? Nearby being a relative word, I think that's pretty much everywhere. Interesting, though.

so strange . . a little netsurfing shows a lot of these reasons. But have you ever done it? or known someone who has flung shoes?


Hey, he was an exchange student in my high school, but he spelled it "Hoo Haas Flung Choo." He was a Chinese-Norwegian.
monster • Nov 21, 2007 3:12 pm
Apparently, there's a fashion for throwing them on trees too....

Shoe Trees
Drax • Nov 21, 2007 5:29 pm
If something was miss-spelled in a dictionary how would we know?
Cloud • Nov 21, 2007 5:43 pm
well, if it has three "s"s in a row, you can be pretty sure it's misspelled.
Sundae • Nov 21, 2007 5:51 pm
We get shoes on top of bus shelters here (you can see them from the top of double deckers). Definitely those pesky kids.

My thing to ponder - when someone says, "Can I help you?" why is help the last thing you'll usually get?
Drax • Nov 21, 2007 6:02 pm
Why is it that when someone finds something they've lost, and when asked about it, they'll say "It was in the last place I looked."?
Clodfobble • Nov 21, 2007 11:29 pm
Cloud wrote:
But have you ever done it? or known someone who has flung shoes?


In my high school, all the seniors in marching band would throw their (purchased uniform) shoes over a line in front of the school on the last day of classes. It's as good a tradition as any, it's not like they'd ever need those shoes again... The janitors always took them down within a day or two though.
LJ • Nov 21, 2007 11:50 pm
i've totally done it. we all do it. everybody does it.
Cloud • Nov 22, 2007 12:01 am
. . . even though they say you'll go blind . . .
Sundae • Nov 22, 2007 5:14 am
I only threw a shoe once. Never again.

I was in the first year of school, so 4-5. We were going for a walk in the Convent garden when my teacher saw a shoe by the side of the bushes. It looked long abandoned, an old tramp's shoe. She threw it further into the bushes - this was in the days before recyling. Now something in my little anarchist soul rejoiced at this - shoes, which had to be cared for, not scuffed, which WERE EXPENSIVE could be thrown into bushes! You couldn't even do that with litter!

A few days later on the playing field, I found my chance. A whole pile of abandoned shoes! I took one at random and lobbed it over the hedge into the allotments beyond. It really flew. Sadly, they belonged to a group of older girls doing handstands nearby. I was completely unable to explain myself and fell back on a lie suggested by the girl whose shoe I had liberated, "Did an older girl tell you to do it?" I was still in trouble, but so genuinely baffled that they let me off lightly.

Sorry Catherine Gordon. I honestly didn't know it was wrong, but I did do it on purpose.
Drax • Dec 4, 2007 2:38 am
If you keep trying to prove Murphy's law, will something go wrong?
classicman • Dec 4, 2007 8:32 am
Where do the letters go when you hit the backspace or delete key?
Radar • Dec 4, 2007 8:41 am
If a man says something in the woods and there is no woman around to hear him say it....is he still wrong?
Griff • Dec 4, 2007 9:03 am
Let me ask the wife. ;)
Crimson Ghost • Dec 4, 2007 10:21 am
classicman;412909 wrote:
Where do the letters go when you hit the backspace or delete key?


The Dead Letter Office.
classicman • Dec 4, 2007 1:21 pm
Crimson Ghost;412927 wrote:
The Dead Letter Office.


No no no, I mena you are typing a paper or writing an email and you misspell a word or change your writing. You delete and retype it - where do those letters deleted go???
icileparadise • Dec 4, 2007 1:37 pm
Most of these abandoned shoes are juvenile trainers/sneakers. It's kids alright the little shods.
Cicero • Dec 4, 2007 2:04 pm
My brothers used to hide and get rid of their shoes in a poorly thought out attempt to evade school..........

My husband tells me a different story of why the shoes are there sometimes (in urban communities).......And I couldn't believe it! And had never thought of it!!
classicman • Dec 4, 2007 2:17 pm
Cicero;413005 wrote:
My husband tells me a different story of why the shoes are there sometimes (in urban communities).......And I couldn't believe it! And had never thought of it!!


well??? are you gonna share?
HungLikeJesus • Dec 4, 2007 2:23 pm
I took this picture last week in Puerto Vallarta, MX.
Cloud • Dec 7, 2007 10:57 am
why isn't there a bunch of spam offering creams to shrink one's vagina?
jester • Dec 7, 2007 11:16 am
Why do some clothes say "One Size Fits All", when clearly that's not true?
BigV • Dec 7, 2007 6:17 pm
Cloud;414153 wrote:
why isn't there a bunch of spam offering creams to shrink one's vagina?


Because men don't have vaginas.

Because spammers think outside the box.

Because it's on the inside, out of sight.
sikcboy • Dec 7, 2007 6:42 pm
see below
Sundae • Dec 7, 2007 6:42 pm
Do gay men go for anal bleaching?
Aliantha • Dec 7, 2007 7:55 pm
gay men and also women who like a bit of arse play now and then. Haven't you ever wondered about those people in porno's who don't have a little brownie? ;)
Aliantha • Dec 7, 2007 7:56 pm
Over here, we don't throw shoes over power lines (well we do, but anyway) we tie two toads together with copper wire and attempt to electocute them. I suppose being hit with high voltage is probably preferable to being bashed to death with a cricket bat...but who knows.
Cloud • Dec 7, 2007 10:10 pm
why is it not cool for guys to ask for directions if they're lost (or to, you know--look at a map); but it's okay to spend money on a fancy gadget that beeps and lights up to show your exact position on the earth?
Aliantha • Dec 8, 2007 12:21 am
Because then they don't have to ask where they are?...
regular.joe • Dec 8, 2007 2:18 am
Drax;408881 wrote:
Why do you often see a shoe lying on the side of the street?


I'm new to the cellar. You will have to cut me some slack if I post to old threads. Holy cow is there a lot to read.

A long time ago, I worked in a store that sold a lot of shoes. At the end of the day, there would always be at least one shoe, as many as four or five shoes without mates.

I don't know if the other shoe is on the side of the road. Maybe the guy who is missing a shoe, came into our store to get another. I really don't know.

I do suspect the phenomena is related.
Drax • Dec 8, 2007 2:39 am
regular.joe;414440 wrote:
I'm new to the cellar. You will have to cut me some slack if I post to old threads.


Whut duzat have to with shoes?
Drax • Dec 8, 2007 2:43 am
classicman;412996 wrote:
No no no, I mena you are typing a paper or writing an email and you misspell a word or change your writing. You delete and retype it - where do those letters deleted go???


The Void.
Drax • Dec 8, 2007 2:44 am
Why are they called apartments when they are stuck together?
regular.joe • Dec 8, 2007 2:46 am
Drax;414447 wrote:
Whut duzat have to with shoes?


nothing, why?
Aliantha • Dec 8, 2007 2:49 am
Drax;414447 wrote:
Whut duzat have to with shoes?


Maybe he's just not a post whore like the rest of us Drax. Perhaps he tries to include all his points in the one post instead of a different post for every point. ;)
Drax • Dec 8, 2007 2:50 am
regular.joe;414452 wrote:
nothing, why?


Cuz you included it in a reply to my shoe question.
regular.joe • Dec 8, 2007 2:53 am
Did you make it past those two sentences?
Aliantha • Dec 8, 2007 2:55 am
:corn:
regular.joe • Dec 8, 2007 2:59 am
Did you bring the 3-D glasses Ali?
Drax • Dec 8, 2007 3:00 am
regular.joe;414457 wrote:
Did you make it past those two sentences?


Actually, I did read the whole post.
Aliantha • Dec 8, 2007 3:04 am
regular.joe;414461 wrote:
Did you bring the 3-D glasses Ali?


Yep, and a large coke. ;)
regular.joe • Dec 8, 2007 3:04 am
Drax;414462 wrote:
Actually, I did read the whole post.


Oh. O.K. then.
Aliantha • Dec 8, 2007 3:08 am
Drax, are you going to behave, or do I have to spank you again? :bitching:
Drax • Dec 8, 2007 3:16 am
Aliantha;414466 wrote:
Drax, are you going to behave, or do I have to spank you again? :bitching:


SPANK ME BABY! :D
Aliantha • Dec 8, 2007 3:18 am
Yes, that's what I thought you'd say! :whip:
regular.joe • Dec 9, 2007 12:22 am
:corn:
Aliantha • Dec 9, 2007 1:15 am
I hope there's some butter on that popcorn joe. We might need it. ;)
regular.joe • Dec 9, 2007 2:24 am
Yea, I'll get some. Hold on a sec....looking for my other shoe....
Aliantha • Dec 9, 2007 3:30 am
Maybe it's in the middle of the street?
regular.joe • Dec 9, 2007 10:31 am
Exactly!
Cloud • Dec 9, 2007 11:39 am
not that there aren't shrink creams, just that there isn't the same amount of spam as the push for Big Dicks.

Here's what the incomparable Violet Blue says about them (on her "safe sex" page, if you are not reading your Violet Blue - shame on you - here 'tis: http://www.tinynibbles.com/violetblue.html )


No one knows if "Shrink Creams" can hurt you. Widely available "shrink creams", "sure grip", "tighten up" and "feel like a virgin again" claim to make the vagina smaller or tighter. The key ingredient in these creams is alum. Alum absorbs water out of the outer layer of the skin; as more water is absorbed, the cells begin to swell, closing the ducts that water would normally flow through. No study has been done on the effect of these creams on the cervix, which is what they eventually end up getting rubbed on during penetration, but I'll wager it's not good. I kind of want to make the manufacturers snort a thick rail of alum, so they can study the effects on their own mucous membranes. What I really hate about these "shrink" creams is the fact that they're trading on female insecurities about the vagina not being tight, pretty or good enough for their male partner -- like we need any negative reinforcement from our pussy-phobic culture about how we look, feel or smell down there. The marketing text runs, "China Shrink Cream is formulated to tighten the vaginal walls. China Shrink Cream is to help with loose vagina due to multiple child birth and frigidity." I also want to throw up every time I see the packaging on these creams, as they are often called "oriental" or "China Shrink Cream", paralying off of racist stereotypes and exotifying Asian "sexual mystery", much the same way the porn industry fetishizes skin color and markets (I think racist) negative stereotypes about black male sexuality with its "interracial" videos.
regular.joe • Dec 9, 2007 12:36 pm
ROFL...and you thought my post had nothing to do with your original question?

We are officially off the reservation.
Drax • Dec 9, 2007 4:05 pm
New one: Does the reverse side also have a reverse side?
regular.joe • Dec 9, 2007 4:09 pm
The statement at the bottom of this post is true.









The statement at the top of this post is false.
Drax • Dec 9, 2007 4:33 pm
Why does slow down and slow up mean the same thing?
classicman • Dec 9, 2007 6:26 pm
Drax;414843 wrote:
Why does slow down and slow up mean the same thing?


Thats a good one.
Drax • Dec 9, 2007 7:41 pm
If a person kills their clone is it murder or suicide?
Cicero • Dec 13, 2007 12:19 pm
classicman;413010 wrote:
well??? are you gonna share?


Still pondering this classic?
lol!!!
:D
classicman • Dec 13, 2007 12:26 pm
Yes I am actually - I just forgot - thanks for reminding me
Shawnee123 • Dec 13, 2007 12:28 pm
After going back 3 pages to figure out wtf you two were beeping about...I have to say:

Spill the beans Cic! Now I"m curious.
Cicero • Dec 13, 2007 12:42 pm
lol! Now you both can ponder!! Bwahahaaa!
No really:
Some shoes on electric wires are there for dealers to let junkers know where to get durgs. In the ghettooooo.......

Random question that I didn't think I'd get a real answer to.....
:eek:

Now it really makes sense because the places are usually notorious for that type of activity in the first place....never put the two together before....
Shawnee123 • Dec 13, 2007 12:49 pm
Going to look for shoes 'cause I am out of durgs! Thanks for the tip. ;)
classicman • Dec 13, 2007 3:10 pm
Thats what cloud said back in post # 20 - now you gotta make up something even better!
Drax • Dec 13, 2007 4:09 pm
Why are women always right, even when they're not?
Shawnee123 • Dec 13, 2007 4:12 pm
Because you're stupid. ;)

just joshin' :lol:
Drax • Dec 13, 2007 4:22 pm
Naw, you're right, I am stupid, but in least I ain't dumb. ;)
Shawnee123 • Dec 13, 2007 4:34 pm
OK, here's one.

Lefty loosy righty tighty. I HATE that phrase. I mean, it depends where you consider the circle whether you are going to the left or right.
Drax • Dec 13, 2007 4:43 pm
Never heard that one.
Cicero • Dec 13, 2007 4:44 pm
Drax- Even if I can't hear you talking you are still wrong.
:)
No exceptions guys!!
xoxoxoBruce • Dec 16, 2007 12:44 am
Shawnee123;416262 wrote:
OK, here's one.

Lefty loosy righty tighty. I HATE that phrase. I mean, it depends where you consider the circle whether you are going to the left or right.
It's referring to which way your hand is turning.
Drax • Dec 16, 2007 2:54 am
When you take a piss, where are you taking it?
ZenGum • Dec 16, 2007 3:03 am
xoxoxoBruce;417008 wrote:
It's referring to which way your hand is turning.


Doesn't that have the same problem?

I get around it by the rule that it's the way the top of the nut/screw/lid is moving, that you go by.

My rule was: Clockwise to screw, ANTI-clockwise to ANTI-screw.
(Ok COUNTER-clockwise to COUNTER-screw for you Americans.)
xoxoxoBruce • Dec 16, 2007 4:35 pm
ZenGum;417043 wrote:
Doesn't that have the same problem?

No, you normally look at the top of your hand, performing those maneuvers.
classicman • Dec 16, 2007 6:18 pm
xoxoxoBruce;417143 wrote:
No, you normally look at the top of your hand, performing those maneuvers.



Are you kidding Bruce? Heck - they drive on the wrong side of the road - nothing normal there.
BigV • Dec 17, 2007 11:17 am
Drax;417041 wrote:
When you take a piss, where are you taking it?


Out of one's bladder into the toilet / urinal / catheter / bed / tree etc.
Drax • Dec 17, 2007 4:11 pm
BigV;417308 wrote:
Out of one's bladder into the toilet / urinal / catheter / bed / tree etc.


Ok. That one was too easy...too...?logical? I guess. :p

Try this one: How do you tell when you are out of invisible ink?
monster • Dec 17, 2007 4:29 pm
Drax;417375 wrote:
How do you tell when you are out of invisible ink?



You get an alert from the print manager to change the invisible cart.
BigV • Dec 17, 2007 6:13 pm
Drax;417375 wrote:
--snip--
How do you tell when you are out of invisible ink?


No more juice can be wrung from the lemon.
Drax • Dec 17, 2007 7:51 pm
Why do we label underwear as a pair?
monster • Dec 17, 2007 7:58 pm
two holes. used to be two legs. like a pair of trousers or a pair of tights (use babelfish if you need translation). Didn't always used to be joined together.

next.
Drax • Dec 17, 2007 8:01 pm
If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success?
monster • Dec 17, 2007 8:02 pm
No.
monster • Dec 17, 2007 8:03 pm
If it were a book entitled "Failure" sold wrapped, no preview possible.... maybe.
Cicero • Dec 19, 2007 6:55 pm
Is Cicero too busy to be on the cellar?!? AAAAhhh! Christmas! New Job! Aaaaah!

Gotta go...
:D
Gravdigr • Aug 22, 2014 4:24 pm
If I punch myself in the face and it hurts...

...am I weak, or, strong?
Lola Bunny • Aug 26, 2014 12:15 pm
Who says the strong can't feel pain?
xoxoxoBruce • Sep 5, 2014 12:13 pm
Gravdigr;907876 wrote:
If I punch myself in the face and it hurts...

...am I weak, or, strong?
Not sure but dumb comes to mind. :haha:
Gravdigr • Sep 5, 2014 4:15 pm
I thought you all took that as a given.
xoxoxoBruce • Sep 5, 2014 9:08 pm
Fuck no, you're smart enough to relieve homie of his scooter, and dumb enough to loose it to a cat. :lol2:
Gravdigr • Sep 6, 2014 5:20 pm
I'm not sure how to feel about myself, now.
xoxoxoBruce • Sep 6, 2014 5:29 pm
Just keep feeling around and soon you'll forget everything else.:blush:
Gravdigr • Oct 10, 2014 1:20 pm
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BigV • Oct 10, 2014 3:25 pm
Hahaha!
Gravdigr • Oct 18, 2014 3:02 pm
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I don't know what's up w/the carrot in the background, but, his plan is, apparently, working perfectly.
sexobon • Oct 20, 2014 12:15 am
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Gravdigr • Oct 23, 2014 3:44 pm
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DanaC • Oct 24, 2014 4:42 pm
hahahahahaha. That's really funny.
sexobon • Nov 22, 2014 4:48 pm
Wouldn't it be great if Bill Cosby could do a show in Ferguson, Missouri to provide some comic relief and ease tensions?
Gravdigr • Nov 29, 2014 4:16 pm
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Gravdigr • Dec 20, 2014 4:03 pm
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sexobon • Dec 24, 2014 1:27 am
To ponder yonder; or, consider hither, that is the question ...
Gravdigr • Dec 24, 2014 12:23 pm
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:jig:
xoxoxoBruce • Feb 7, 2015 6:37 pm
This guy must be serious because he's going to a lot of trouble. Maybe wants to be a rapper, or be a wrapper. :rolleyes:
classicman • Feb 8, 2015 8:57 pm
Does he have a pet sandal?
Crimson Ghost • Feb 9, 2015 12:09 am
No, but he does sit on top of his dog house.
Gravdigr • Feb 9, 2015 5:16 pm
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Yeah.
xoxoxoBruce • Feb 17, 2015 5:30 am
No, school is one long teach the kids how little they know, because they think they know everything.
Gravdigr • Jun 5, 2015 2:26 pm
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