Conversation Starters
Well yesterday my friend and I were at a party and got two girls to come to my friend's apartment and everything was going well. But, when we go there, we realized we didn't have that much similar interests and conversation halted and they ended leaving which was really lame.
So since most of you are passed the stage I am at where I am looking for girls almost every night and haven't had the experience to have a massive storage of conversation starters, lets share the love. What are some of your guys best and favorite conversation starters and I guess anything that is related to this?
[english accent] Do you drive?.......(yes) can you give us a lift back to me castle? [/english accent]
or
hey....wanna get a pizza and screw?....what, you don't like pizza?
but seriously....
if you got nuthin to talk about.....you cant fake it. just talk about what you would talk about with your friends. if you're into d&d....you should try to talk about that.....maybe you'll run into someone with the same interest....maybe not...but at least you'll not be wasting your time trying to impress a girl. remember that they are just as scared and boring as you are. you could even talk about what kinds of things you should talk about. kind of a seinfeldian approach.
Come on, man, it's college. Standard line: "What's your major?" Followed closely by, "Interesting--what do you think you'd like to do with that?"
Treat it like improv. I've become pretty popular in my department and residence hall by doing that.
Never turn down an invitation, and never let an opening pass. It's better to go too far than not far enough. If you cross a line, you're at least remarkable. If you stay strictly in bounds all the time, you're a sucker.
My job involves making lots of small talk. I've got a bit formulaic, but it works for the environment. Mind you it isn't designed to get me laid so you might need to modify it.
1. What is your job/major/hobby/pet/sexuality/etc? (Short answer)
2. Do you like that? (short answer)
3. Why do you like it? (long answer)
The trick is listening and understanding the response to ask questions that lead somewhere.
Other standbys:
What kind of music/TV shows/movies/sports do you like (add Q. 3, above)
Which are better: dogs or cats?
Your last vacation.
or.....Do you like Monkeys?
or....Do you like....ummm...stuff? then look at your feet and scuff them around a little.
or.....look her right in the eye and say...."I wanna be ON you."
In order to get a really hot chick interested in you,
you have to be a douchebag!Come on, man, it's college. Standard line: "What's your major?" Followed closely by, "Interesting--what do you think you'd like to do with that?"
Haha, those are usually my last resort when it comes to talking with people. I would rather start with something other than just that and maybe stand out a bit.
Do you like....ummm...stuff? then look at your feet and scuff them around a little
I think I'm going to try this one, haha.
Poking fun at em, being a little bit of a smart-ass usually works well for me.
ask if they want to wrestle. if they say yes, immediately go for the standing cradle....and then the figure 4 leg lock.
In order to get a really hot chick interested in you, you have to be a douchebag!
You forgot climbing the
ladder.
I have no advice. I've always sucked at this. But I'm curious, what was the reason for them coming back to your apartment? (Besides that ;) I mean the STATED reason...) "You want to come back to my apartment and . . . " "have a drink?" "watch a video?" "play twister?" etc.?
Try to get onto the subject of humour. If you get a women back to your apartment she has at least a passing interest in you anyway. And once you're past the hurdle of complete disinterest, women generally fall for men who make them laugh.
I can't bear smalltalk myself, but if a man asks what comedy I enjoy and can talk about it himself, or even can build on that and make a few relevant jokes then I will get warm and fuzzy. Same re books and poetry, but that's specific to me.
Honestly, find out what a woman is really interested in. ASK her - you might think it's lame but women love to express their opinions to a man who is really listening. Head on one side for sincerity, SMILE, and ask her relevant questions to prove you are listening. If you're not gettign anywhere with random questions ask, "So what are you really into? What really makes you light up inside?" And then compliment her on how she looks when she is talking passionately. It's a killer line.
BTW I agree long term your best bet is to talk about what you like if you are looking for a life partner. But simply to stop girls leaving... it's all about her.
"Guess what I've got in my butt?"
Find something for all y'all to do with your hands (:eek:) -like (preparing and) eating nibbles or a silly game like pass the pigs or triv. It gives somewhere else to look other than into the eyes without being rude (which can make initiations of small talk easier), but doesn't take so much attention that you can't chat too. Also, for all it's bad press, something like Triv can in itself provide conversation starters. Monopoly's a good one too. Cards can get a little too intense. Or invest in some kids games -Mousetrap, snakes and ladders. They make look at you funny at first, but they'll probably join in rather than leave and it'll break the ice. Use your local thrift store to get these cheaply.
yabbut...in college...chutes and ladders ALWAYS turns into 'strip' chutes and ladders. next thing you know it's just another full blown orgie. ho hum. we men are looking for good conversation, not an endless stream of gratuitous sex with a bunch of empty headed bimbos. christ.
Surely you could talk about politics or current events??? ;)
Srsly though. When I was younger, it was usually about what you did last night or are planning to do the next time you knock back a few coldies. (which of course leads to a perfect opening for inviting 'the girls' along)
Isn't it like that everywhere with college aged kids?
yabbut...in college...chutes and ladders ALWAYS turns into 'strip' chutes and ladders. next thing you know it's just another full blown orgie. ho hum. we men are looking for good conversation, not an endless stream of gratuitous sex with a bunch of empty headed bimbos. christ.
you can't converse while getting a hand job? christ.
Do you guys have a TV and DVD player in your room? Pop in an R-rated comedy or cheesey horror movie, and make sure you have mixings for frou-frou shooters ahead of time. So if you guys can't think of anything to talk about, there's still something to do...but the combination of those things ought to lead to some sort of conversation, even if it's totally inane.
we men are looking for good conversation, not an endless stream of gratuitous sex with a bunch of empty headed bimbos. christ.
SEEZZ YOU !!!
My advice; no matter what you say, make sure you're grinning like an idiot when you say it. In my experience what you say doesn't matter so much, but if you say it and you look like Emo McEmo from Emo's-R-Us out for an Emo-ducation, then you're not going to pull.
Grin like a fucking idiot, all the time. Smiley people get laid. Frowny people don't. :D
lol...nice post there kiwi. Kiaora, and welcome to the cellar if you haven't been welcomed before.
Why thank you very much, er, Aussie. ;)
Tena tatou katoa!
I had a rather nice welcome just before. But yours is just as appreciated. :D
And just to get it out of the way;
"Six! Six! Sixsixsixsixsix!" :)
Chasers War on Everything /almost/ caught out our Prime Minister with that, but she managed a reasonably passable Aussie accent. :D
A way to woman's heart is through her stomach. And I've heard specifically through chocolate. I also heard if you can make a girl laugh that's all you need. Or just be a bomb ass listener, screw what your friends say if you're doing the...screwing! Or just be a gruff manly figure whom she'll swoon over your machoness. Or just be a nice guy whom she can genuinely connect to and care for.
Actually.........
This is about conversation starters isn't it, damnit.
I'm all for one liners, as cheesy and as bad as they really are:
"Hey girl, who took the stars from the sky, and put them in your eyes :cool: ."
I saw this on the show "The Pickup Artist" on VH1 at a club setting:
Guy: Did you know that 95% of girls masturbate in the shower? The other 5% sing.
Girls: Uh, no.
Guy: Do you know what they sing?
Girls: No.
Guy: You must be the ones who masturbate.
lol...you mean the woman that sounds like a man???
Do you guys have a TV and DVD player in your room?
I don't, I just have my laptop that can play DVDs but my friend does. We realized we should of just put in a movie right away or separated the two girls since the group thing went downhill and we both are better with one on one conversation anyways.
Fresh, I want to use some of those pick up lines just to see how they react. I was actually going to do lumberjim's "are you interested in stuff...." line to see what she would do on Saturday but the girl I was going to do it to walked away after I said I was dressed up as an oompa loompa (I wasn't), she didn't appreciate the humor....
lmao...why would you say you were dressed as an oompa loompa? And what do you realy look like that she didn't see the humour? lol That last line just made me practically piss myself.
My friend and I left our costumes at my friends house on Thursday and he was gone so we couldn't get them. My friend was going as Pagoda and I was going as Dudley, yes I wore short shorts, from the Royal Tenenbaums (sp) because of our concert on Thursday and our band name comes from that movie.
But anyways, we both put on black long-sleeved collared shirts, mine had a design on it, and a tie. We actually looked like the guys from Green Day. But we were thinking of what we would say we were when we were walking there and decided we would say something ridiculous, wait for a confused look, then change to something else and confuse them even further.
No one besides that one girl asked me what I was so I didn't do that besides then.
maybe all the rest were afraid?
Another question occurs to me.
Were you still dressed like that when the girls left your apparment? lol maybe the beer buzz started to wear off??? ;)
lol...you mean the woman that sounds like a man???
Yep. Him! :D
maybe all the rest were afraid?
Another question occurs to me.
Were you still dressed like that when the girls left your apparment? lol maybe the beer buzz started to wear off??? ;)
Haha, nah, We actually didn't dress up on Friday because we didn't have our costumes and those two girls were pretty sober the whole night as well.
And just to get it out of the way;
"Six! Six! Sixsixsixsixsix!" :)
Chasers War on Everything /almost/ caught out our Prime Minister with that, but she managed a reasonably passable Aussie accent. :D
Hi there Bandito!
(a) did you deliberately name yourself after a bikie gang?
(b) would you like to buy a vowel (location: wgtn, NZ)?
(c) I've
almost grown past making fun of accents (sharing at office at Uni with two NZers called Barrrrbara and Dehhhborah got it out of my system!) ... but ... I recently had to do a speaking test on a Japanese lass, who was quick to declare ... "I dud uh homestay in New Zuhland". "You sure did!" said I. :lol:
Hi there Bandito!
(a) did you deliberately name yourself after a bikie gang?
(b) would you like to buy a vowel (location: wgtn, NZ)?
(c) I've almost grown past making fun of accents (sharing at office at Uni with two NZers called Barrrrbara and Dehhhborah got it out of my system!) ... but ... I recently had to do a speaking test on a Japanese lass, who was quick to declare ... "I dud uh homestay in New Zuhland". "You sure did!" said I. :lol:
(a) oh no, really? I had no idea. It's my old gamer tag from the UT99 days. Inspired (of all things) by 'The Three Amigos'.
(b) Vowels are overrated. Its consonants that make the sounds we want to hear. :)
(c) Only almost? Fur shuhme! :)
**Edit: Just had to rescue a weta from our dishwasher. Again. Goddamn creepy-crawlies are everywhere.
Pierce - SRSLY
In my opinion the best advice you've been given is mine (natch!) and Monster's
If you want a line ask her what "really lights her up"
Use those words. If she can't even answer keep pushing - if she's a real lamer it might finding the right shade of lipstick or something, but every woman has a topic that excites her. Then compliment her. It's classic NLP, she will associate you with the topic that sets her heart racing and she will believe you see her soul. Doesn't work long term of course, we are talking instant impression. It might sound cheesy - TRY IT.
And Monster's suggestion re games. Blimey, can't believe I didn't think of it myself. Ice breaking games are used in hugely expensive seminars/ training courses for a reason. They work. Cheapest and easiest to pull off? The Post-It/ Rizla game. Yes, you will feel like a 14 year old suggesting it (I was sometimes looked at the same way when I did) but people love it within about 2 minutes, trust me.
If you know it, skip the next bit. You write the name of a character/ real person (famous usually unless it's close friends) on whatever you are using. Pass to the next person who sticks it to their forehead. You take it in turns to answer yes or no questions until you get the right answer. A yes gets another question, a no the question passes to the next player. Typical questions are Am I famous, am I a real person, am I am animal, am I animated, am I more than 50 years old etc etc. The interaction comes from laughing at what other people "are" and interpretation of the rules.
Never, never, never think you look like a twat for suggesting a game. Act confident about it til you have had a success - then you'll know how well it really does work.
Thank you SG, I was seriously going to use "What are you interested in" line when I was going to actually try but I will use light you up instead, maybe both.
For monster's, damn, I kinda want to see that work. Games is definitely good though.