I wish I could...

Flint • Oct 26, 2007 10:48 am
...sing like the late Brad Delp (Boston). What do you wish you could do?
Dingleschmutz • Oct 26, 2007 11:07 am
Destroy other cars on the freeway, and have carte blanche to do so.
lumberjim • Oct 26, 2007 11:16 am
play guitar like Hendrix or Page.
HungLikeJesus • Oct 26, 2007 11:48 am
But would you skip the steps that travel in between to meet your dream?
Shawnee123 • Oct 26, 2007 11:53 am
I wish I could walk around on the ceiling. I don't know why, it just always seemed like it would be fun.
lumberjim • Oct 26, 2007 11:57 am
like spider pig?
[youtube]714-Ioa4XQw[/youtube]
Shawnee123 • Oct 26, 2007 11:57 am
yeah, like that!
lookout123 • Oct 26, 2007 12:00 pm
i would like the power to help the truly clueless and oblivious understand what the rest of the world sees.
Shawnee123 • Oct 26, 2007 12:00 pm
like spider pig?
smurfalicious • Oct 26, 2007 12:01 pm
fly.
have a penis.
have smaller feet.
see entire the world.
make everyone i love happy.
rid humanity of inherently evil people.
shoot the cunts that think they own the road.
own a harley. now.
lookout123 • Oct 26, 2007 12:01 pm
just like that.
Dingleschmutz • Oct 26, 2007 12:01 pm
lookout123;399986 wrote:
i would like the power to help the truly clueless and oblivious understand what the rest of the world sees.


I think mass genocide of the stupid would be easier though...
lookout123 • Oct 26, 2007 12:06 pm
yeah, but i'd have to get elected to office for that to be possible. it seems much more likely that i'll just develop this super power.
Shawnee123 • Oct 26, 2007 12:07 pm
Dingleschmutz;399991 wrote:
I think mass genocide of the stupid would be easier though...


Impossible, they're like cockroaches...you'll never get rid of them.
Dingleschmutz • Oct 26, 2007 12:10 pm
Shawnee123;399998 wrote:
Impossible, they're like cockroaches...you'll never get rid of them.


Ok... "I think mass genocide of the stupid would be more fun..."

Does that work?
Shawnee123 • Oct 26, 2007 12:15 pm
Works for me! ;)
ZenGum • Oct 26, 2007 12:15 pm
smurfalicious;399989 wrote:
fly.
have a penis.
have smaller feet.
see entire the world.
make everyone i love happy.
rid humanity of inherently evil people.
shoot the cunts that think they own the road.
own a harley. now.


You're pretty easy to please.

fly................ Easy. Flying twice, that's the tricky part.

have a penis....... :checks profile: I'll lend you mine.

have smaller feet. ...... CHOP CHOP done.

see entire the world. ..... Go outside. Look down. That's it. Turn it over if you want to see the other side.

make everyone i love happy. .... stop loving anyone.

rid humanity of inherently evil people. ... easiest way would be to destroy all life on earth ... we'd sure be rid of them then. (EDIT: See Dings' comments.)

shoot the cunts that think they own the road. ... You can right now. Getting away with it ... harder.

own a harley. now. ... how bad do you want it? $$$

Good luck...
Shawnee123 • Oct 26, 2007 12:17 pm
ZenGum;400003 wrote:
have a penis....... :checks profile: I'll lend you mine.


Good luck...


Cool, does it come with the standard bigger paycheck? :p
Dingleschmutz • Oct 26, 2007 12:22 pm
Shawnee123;400005 wrote:
Cool, does it come with the standard bigger paycheck? :p


Not here, unfortunately. It does give you immunity to Grey's Anatomy though.
ZenGum • Oct 26, 2007 12:23 pm
Shawnee123;400005 wrote:
Cool, does it come with the standard bigger paycheck? :p


Ans 1. Well it has never come that way before but I suppose I could try ...
Ans 2. If that ever comes out I'm going straight to the doctor. No, the bank.
Ans 3. Nope, just two balls and the option of a tick attachment.
Ans 4. :checks bank account: :( apparently not.

I suppose I should have said share rather than lend.
Sundae • Oct 26, 2007 12:31 pm
I wish I could speak a really difficult language to learn fluently and well, as if I was brought up speaking it.

Any of the Indian or Chinese languages would be cool - imagine going to a restaurant and ordering in fluent Hindi or Mandarin. Or Finnish - okay I'd have to go to Finland on holiday, but I'd like to go there anyway. Do you know that they have fifteen noun cases?
Dingleschmutz • Oct 26, 2007 12:32 pm
Ah, I agree with that. I wish I could speak Latin, just because there's no real reason to unless you want to have sex with altar boys. Which I don't, for the record.
ZenGum • Oct 26, 2007 12:57 pm
Dingleschmutz;400013 wrote:
Ah, I agree with that. I wish I could speak Latin, just because there's no real reason to unless you want to have sex with altar boys. Which I don't, for the record.


How about Klingon or Sindarin, then?
Dingleschmutz • Oct 26, 2007 1:29 pm
I think I've watched 5 minutes total of Star Trek in my life, not too interested in Klingon. Sindarin would be kinda cool, though if we're really getting silly, I'd prefer to speak the black tongue of Mordor; turn the sky black, make the earth shake, and have my voice echo ominously.
ZenGum • Oct 26, 2007 1:32 pm
Dingleschmutz;400043 wrote:
I think I've watched 5 minutes total of Star Trek in my life, not too interested in Klingon. Sindarin would be kinda cool, though if we're really getting silly, I'd prefer to speak the black tongue of Mordor; turn the sky black, make the earth shake, and have my voice echo ominously.


Nerd spotting time:
I can speak Sauronic. Well, only the inscription from the ring ... but it's a start ...
Dingleschmutz • Oct 26, 2007 1:35 pm
A start, sure... But can you make it sound as evil as it's supposed to? I bet you have to beat the fat death metal chicks off with a lead pipe if you can.
Cicero • Oct 26, 2007 2:15 pm
Sundae Girl;400011 wrote:
I wish I could speak a really difficult language to learn fluently and well, as if I was brought up speaking it.

Any of the Indian or Chinese languages would be cool - imagine going to a restaurant and ordering in fluent Hindi or Mandarin. Or Finnish - okay I'd have to go to Finland on holiday, but I'd like to go there anyway. Do you know that they have fifteen noun cases?


Cicero Talk Thai....Oh..Yes...Cicero talk Thai goooood. *"Meet the Family" voice*
SG...Asian languages are easier than you think...give it a try!
I'm also trying to learn greek and homeric greek but don't have anyone to speak to (modern greek) but my husband, that has no clue what I am saying...and quite rightly doesn't care.

Here's one SG-- It's easy. SG Suuuoooy! Stress the u because if you stress the o too much it means the opposite.(that means SG is pretty) Like soy but add a u first and stress the heck out of it. It's a hell of a lot easier than you think SG...it's the people that aren't learning the languages that say that. Give it a try first! It isn't that hard. Especially if it's just conversational.....sometimes it's easier just because these things can be very informal. Like, SG suuuoooy! You don't even have to give it a verb because the natives don't. SG pretty- is how it translates. Easy! And you sound cute when you speak it properly.


This in no way, means that I am smart. This means I will do well in Thailand which I will never go to, and can read classic greek literature that no one has any use for. They will do away with me in the above suggested genocide stupid camps for having a lot of knowledge that for the most part is useless to everyone but me.(When or if they get the chance) Yes...I never argued that I didn't qualify as stupid...

Look...I'm getting all defensive...

:)
I wish I could just keep my foot out of my mouth.
Dingleschmutz • Oct 26, 2007 2:27 pm
Cicero;400065 wrote:
Like, SG suuuoooy! You don't even have to give it a verb because the natives don't. SG pretty- is how it translates. Easy! And you sound cute when you speak it properly.


In Iowa, suuuuoy is what you hear at a hog-calling contest at the state fair. If I'm inclined to compliment a female, I should probably just stick to English.
Sundae • Oct 26, 2007 2:31 pm
Cicero;400065 wrote:
SG...Asian languages are easier than you think...give it a try!

I tried to sign up for Hindi but they'd already moved on from the Basic (beginner) level and were onto a course for people that had already had lessons. I then signed up for Mandarin but the course was cancelled. I was sneakily pleased after listening to the CD that you needed for the course - I'm not confident I'd ever have got past ni hao

Am impressed by your language skill though!
Cicero • Oct 26, 2007 2:37 pm
hi hao nah?
shu shu'(r)
me too...

I quit mandarin when I told someone something about their grandma mother in a chinese restraunt.

I'm not going to fully quit it....but I still have to work on the others ones first.
LabRat • Oct 26, 2007 3:08 pm
I wish I could get rid of this black lung/bronchitis combo that's been dragging me down for 3 freaking weeks now. I just want to breathe dammit!
Sundae • Oct 26, 2007 3:18 pm
LabRat;400094 wrote:
I wish I could get rid of this black lung/bronchitis combo that's been dragging me down for 3 freaking weeks now. I just want to breathe dammit!

HM thought he had a cold. It was getting pretty old for me as he did nothing but sit around the house for three weeks (okay, he played badminton, but not much else). Turns out he has asthma. Ah well, he's perky again now after getting his new inhalers this afternoon and is back on the Playstation shouting, "Referee!" at the screen. Takes all sorts.

Hope yours shifts soon.
Chocolatl • Oct 28, 2007 12:24 am
... quit academia and become a pastry chef.
lumberjim • Oct 28, 2007 12:45 am
Chocolatl, here's your quiz:

1. Does this shirt make me look fat?

2. Stripes or Solids?

3. If a train leaves the Chicago station headed north at 100 mph, how long until it goes 100 miles?

4. a/s/l?

5. Do you carve your own jack-o-lanterns?

5. Do you ever get deja vu?

5. Do you ever get deja vu?

5. Do you ever get deja vu?

6. How important is math to you?

7. Who was the 35th President of the United States?

8. Which way is up?

9. Have you ever run from the police?

10. What is the loneliest number that you'll ever do?
Chocolatl • Oct 28, 2007 1:05 am
1. The answer to this question is always no, no matter who is asking.
2. Solids
3. An hour?
4. 22/f/Tampa!
5. No
5. Yes
5. Yes
5. Sometimes
6. Three and half stars out of five
7. JFK, but I always liked Taft for that whole "I got stuck in a bathtub" thing.
8. That way. ::points::
9. No.
10. Pi
lumberjim • Oct 28, 2007 1:33 am
ok....stick around....if you make it 3 months, Griff mails you a bunch of free stuff.
Aliantha • Oct 28, 2007 4:40 am
Hey...I never got any free stuff.

I wish I had the guts to start a singing career.
DucksNuts • Oct 28, 2007 6:46 am
I got free stuff....some of it was kinda scary, but I guess Lj's tighie whities would please some people.
thealphajerk • Oct 28, 2007 7:08 am
i wish i could control all of the carrots so i could have a carrot army and destroy all the mushrooms
ZenGum • Oct 28, 2007 7:22 am
thealphajerk;400628 wrote:
i wish i could control all of the carrots so i could have a carrot army and destroy all the mushrooms


I wish I could get my hands on some of whatever it was that AlphaJ just had.
Aliantha • Oct 28, 2007 7:25 am
yeah, I was thinking the same thing.

Where abouts is he from again? He's a bloody mexican isn't he!
thealphajerk • Oct 28, 2007 7:33 am
i ain't on shit, cept beer of course.. i just hate mushrooms is all, and i thought reverend maynard and the carrots could help..

mexican?
Aliantha • Oct 28, 2007 7:34 am
south of the border
DucksNuts • Oct 28, 2007 7:34 am
He's my people.

You love you some mexican

Plus, we have the best carrots
Aliantha • Oct 28, 2007 7:37 am
yeah...hot and spicey. ;)

I don't think you should talk about carrots. Probably best not to mention them at all even...ever again. Flashbacks are a bitch.

I once had some friends who drove from Syd to Bris with giant jelly beans bouncing off the road in front of them. (idiots)
ZenGum • Oct 28, 2007 7:38 am
He's just been eating the wrong mushrooms, then.

Your feeble carrots will not avail you against the might of the mushroom hordes, evil one, for they are fungal and spread quickly, and many of them have magic powers.
thealphajerk • Oct 28, 2007 7:45 am
ahh, yes but the juggernaut that is my furious carrot army will take you from underneath via a complex system of underground mazes and deathtraps..
i am from down south actually
ZenGum • Oct 28, 2007 7:58 am
It is clearly Australian Hour in the Cellar.
We have:
One Banana Bender
Two Mexicans
One (lost) Crow-eater
and I have seen a Sand-groper occasionally

WTF do we call people from NSW?

has anyone seen any Taswegians?
thealphajerk • Oct 28, 2007 8:04 am
ZenGum;400648 wrote:

WTF do we call people from NSW?


umm sideways?
DucksNuts • Oct 28, 2007 8:25 am
Wankers?
ZenGum • Oct 28, 2007 8:31 am
DucksNuts;400651 wrote:
Wankers?


I recall hearing "Whalers" but it seemed a bit strained, and not terribly amusing.

AlphaJ, I should let you know that I do in fact command the carrots.
"BE STILL!" said I. "BE ORANGE, WITH A GREEN THINGY ON TOP!" They know who is boss.
Cicero • Oct 29, 2007 12:41 pm
Chocolatl;400598 wrote:
1. The answer to this question is always no, no matter who is asking.
2. Solids
3. An hour?
4. 22/f/Tampa!
5. No
5. Yes
5. Yes
5. Sometimes
6. Three and half stars out of five
7. JFK, but I always liked Taft for that whole "I got stuck in a bathtub" thing.
8. That way. ::points::
9. No.
10. Pi


I completely failed LJ's quiz.....Glad to see people do better than I did.....
:D

And someone was there to say they completely failed LJ's quiz.

5. Yes.
jester • Oct 30, 2007 6:42 pm
I wish I could....

Quit my day job:rolleyes: