What's upsetting you today?
.. . not sure, but I'm feeling irritable.
hmmm...a tricky one. Probably the corruption involved with Free-Trade Coffees and Teas and wondering if there is Dolphin in my Chicken of the Sea. I mean, they say it's "dolphin-safe" but really--how do I know? They could be lying.
so, that, and my addiction to percocets...otherwise, I'm cool.
--PMS
--I'm worried about horses in my Fish of the Barnyard :p
--These extra pounds of gelatinous goo :mad:
people taking me for granted
I'm sick because the idiots that I work with like to come in while sneezing and coughing all over the place. I think I am going to spit on all their mouses and keyboards
up at 445 at work at 530
patch tuesday
w2k3 svr sp2 * 6
bb ent svr croaked
not one but two doa computers for main conf rm w/ a dozen of the top people in the company watching me watch the busy cursor on the projector. endlessly.
four calls from UK wrt wireless router config
busted wlan card in brazil
...
before 1100.
stupid emails wanting to sell viagra, cialis, how to lose weight, blah, blah, blah
A minor crush has turned into a serious head over heels infatuation but I daren't say anything because he's such a good friend....and if I say something and he doesn't reciprocate it'll be this big uncomfortable thing getting in the way of the friendship. I would hate to spoil the easy rapport we have. I've fancied him for over a year, but this last campaign I was working closely with him and I realised how much I like him. Kind of distracting, with exams around the corner.
Last summer I was working out and looked totally hot, and I bought all of these short shorts and clingy miniskirts to wear. Now that it's time to bring out the summer clothes I've realized that I can't wear ANY of them.
Also, I have to do errands and I'm feeling waaaay too lazy.
Had to kill a mouse that my cat had brought in crippled then lost interest in - and I was clumsy and took too long about it :( .
4 hours on the road. One class to go.
nuthin? I feel fine. could be worse, fo sho'
Boxes of books are freakin' heavy, dammit. This is what comes of letting your children learn to read!
It's almost midnight, and I still have a ton of work to do.
(and here I am on the Cellar. damn!)
Blood in my urine, second week now
a client just called and yelled and cussed at me because of my boss's inaction. Made me cry. I'm a big cryer. :(
A minor crush has turned into a serious head over heels infatuation but I daren't say anything because he's such a good friend....and if I say something and he doesn't reciprocate it'll be this big uncomfortable thing getting in the way of the friendship. I would hate to spoil the easy rapport we have. I've fancied him for over a year, but this last campaign I was working closely with him and I realised how much I like him. Kind of distracting, with exams around the corner.
DanaC - maybe he's reading the Cellar and already knows!
Did you say that you're going through an election?
Dana's a girl, she doesn't get er....oh...election.[SIZE="1"] Nevermind.[/SIZE]
Installing a copy of Windows XP. And Office 2003.
In French.
:rar: :dunce:
The way the Democratic Party is trying to lose the war. Visibly. Gratuitously. In deepest sympathy with the least democratic people on the planet after the North Koreans.
The Jackass has no brains.
none of the penis enlargement gadgets, creams, etc. have worked yet...
Two cute little
pygmy nuthatches were building a nest in my house, so I shot them.
I didn't think I'd feel bad, but I do.
I think they'll be alright.
le XP is installed
le Office is installed
le fourth or fifth or whatever pot of coffee is half installed, and half down the drain
a couple more applications to install and I'm ready to ship.
but tomorrow. and dammit i don't mean in another hour. I'm going home and going to bed.
"Why does the car smell like cheap pancake syrup? Hey, what's that neon green liquid on the garage floor?"
Radiator leak. Crap.
Will Stop-Leak do 'er, or has the tow truck already been called?
Its a small leak on the top and I understand that I'm going to have to swap the entire radiator. I'm not familiar with how Stop Leak works. Are there any potentially negative consequences to using it?
Seagull-manager type person grrrr
Getting a vasectomy on Fri. Can't take my anti-inflammatory this week, I am in a LOT of pain.
I am usually in a lot of pain, but this is unusual. I can hardly chew, my ears are killing me and my back... wow.
The Jackass has no brains.
I guess that's why his approval rating is down to 28%.
Shawnee's remarks made me cry. But I seem to be crying a lot, lately. :(
Having to come in on a planned day off to do something because you are the only one that knows how to do it.
[SIZE="1"]On the upside, it is job security...:right:[/SIZE]
Its a small leak on the top and I understand that I'm going to have to swap the entire radiator. I'm not familiar with how Stop Leak works. Are there any potentially negative consequences to using it?
It could, but not necessarily will, plug your heater core.
Shawnee's remarks made me cry. But I seem to be crying a lot, lately. :(
Whoa there...I didn't say anything to you? Are you thinking of someone else? I get enough guff for things I actually DO say, so please clarify. I need no more bad rap. (And I cry a lot lately too.) :(
Sorry, shouldn't have singled you out, I apologize.
It was the comments in the thread starting etiquette threads, and the "Cloud starts too many threads" and the implication that I am an obnoxious party guest that upset me a bit.
From everyone, not any single person, so I'm in the wrong.
I'm trying to stay away.
No worries. I just found it odd when my name came up, when the last problem on my mind yesterday was how many threads you start. That was the realm of other Cellarites methinks. Like I said, I don't think I did any dissing at all to you. The poll was for funsies, and I thought you would like it too, so if that offended I'm sorry.
Anyhoo, some people don't like a lot of new threads and some do. I don't mind; I have become involved in many you have started that I've enjoyed. If I'm not interested I just skip it.
It's just personal preference, so don't take it personally. (I'm a great advice giver but don't follow my own advice.) :D
just a bump in the road, my friend, just a bump in the road
I'm still hungover from Pink and doing the *freak out* about the new dude.
Oh and Army dude *officially* dumped me as well, which is contributing to the freak out.
I guess that's why his approval rating is down to 28%.
You're forgetting that there's a reason Congress' approval ratings are about 26%. I'd say it's the foolish behavior of the Jackass Party.
I don't get particularly wound up about people being critical of W
per se. Dumping on him on the basis that he has an (R) after his name, though, strikes me as the bloviations of inferior mentality. For God's sake, what has the man done but take down two despotisms -- two despotisms more, in his first four years, than
all the Democratic Presidents have done in the previous fifty.
Despotisms and despots dying are good things, and our world needs much more of this. Despotic regimes behave badly, all the time, whereas democracies are far better global citizens. Complaining about making this happen and moving to sabotage it is but the solidest evidence that the Democrats are in the grip of a singularly inferior mentality, an utter incompetence at foreign policy.
I don't like an incompetent foreign policy. I prefer what the Republicans are doing -- they actually try to further the Republic's interest by winning, not retreating. God help our planet if the Democrats' present ideas of foreign policy gain currency. They'll buy us a great big war.
History will vindicate W and will vindicate those like me who support him.
Cloud, if you're referring to comments I made in that thread I didn't mean to imply that that's what you were. It was something someone else said that made me think of it and then I was just venting because I was a bit peeved. Sorry if I made you feel bad. It wasn't my intention at all.
Ducksy, that's really sad. I hope you don't let it get you down for too long mate.
UG - Excellent! I may not agree with what you say, but I do appreciate your use of the language - particularly the word bloviations. Twice today people used the term fungible when referring to alternative fuels. It's a good word day. Carry on!
well, it's been a couple weeks but it bothers me. My X Boyfriend hung up on me. When I complained about it he broke up with me. Then he said If I wanted to continue even as friends with him I had to appologize for getting upset to begin with. [COLOR="Sienna"]fuck that![/COLOR] It would be like saying" hurt me some more"
That came after 8 months of positive feedback. It came out of the blue with no warning. He got along with my kid and I always thought we made better friends and would be good friends forever. I would have liked to remain one but he took the cowards way out or he's just way out. I'm Very confused and still in shock most the time.
He is in to metaphyics so I think he took the long shuttle to pluto. Made some 'energy' remarks. Did this all by email too. :headshake
sorrry...please no condolences. I actualy feel better. Light a giant weight is off my sholders. It was hard to watch someone intellectually understand zen but live peyton place in his heart. I didn't realize how negative it was until he was gone....even if the circumstances of his leaving were so weird. So weird .. It spooked me about him so I'm glad he's gone.
sorry for the long rant..
Seagull-manager type person grrrr
Curious about
seagull-manager type person'
We love long rants. :)
I'm not happy today because one of our cats is in season and she wont just SHUT THE FUCK UP! I'm about ready to rip her ovaries out myself!
Everyfuckingthing.
I can be more specific, but I am not really into whining...so will just leave it there.
Ali - free the beast, she just wants to get laid. Who are you to stand in the way!!
Actually, yesterday she was driving me nuts so I put her on the front verandah. She managed to escape and spent the rest of the day under our neighbours house and wouldn't come out. The boys had to crawl under and get her out in the evening.
She's a dumb cat. How's she going to get laid if she just hides under the house by herself?
I woke up at 8:30 this morning, and thought it would be nice to go out for Sunday brunch for once, since I had lots of time before going to work. But then I fell back to sleep for too long and missed out. And I still have a headache from oversleeping.
We love long rants. :)
I'm not happy today because one of our cats is in season and she wont just SHUT THE FUCK UP! I'm about ready to rip her ovaries out myself!
thanks.....but yes let her out. In my next response I'll tell you why you should.
Everyfuckingthing.
I can be more specific, but I am not really into whining...so will just leave it there.
Ali - free the beast, she just wants to get laid. Who are you to stand in the way!!
no ducks...please whine. I'll feel better. You know...misery and company...ect...ect.
Ali...if you let her out you'll soon have a beautiful litter of kittens. I don't say this lightly.
You see, my X boyfriend let his mewling cat out and now I am the proud owner of two beautiful 3 month old kittens. :D
It must have been some grand design scheme to aquire kittens after my cat died. So please let the cycle of life continue. It's a beautiful thing...plus she'll feel good for awhile.
Well, this cat is actually the product of the other two cats in the house. I think two generations is enough really. ;) We had our tom cat fixed up after the litter of kittens in order to avoid more kittens. I know they're cute, and we really love our pets, but we have enough now, and sometimes it's hard to find good homes for the babies.
Seagull Manager: flies in from on high, squawks a lot, shits all over everything, flies out again, making off with the last half slice of pizza, too.
It was the comments in the thread starting etiquette threads, and the "Cloud starts too many threads" and the implication that I am an obnoxious party guest that upset me a bit.
From everyone, not any single person, so I'm in the wrong.
I'm trying to stay away.
I'm truly sorry if it made you cry.
I'm not sorry for what I said because it was my opinion, and you did
ask for opinions - it wasn't out of the blue.
Just because
I don't like lots of new one-question threads it doesn't make me right. I could easily do without the gun threads or religious threads but they were here before I was, so I accept them as part of the Cellar. I'm selfish enough to want this place to stay the same as the day I joined, but if it makes you feel any better Cloud, I appear to be in a minority.
One of the things I love about this place is that it very rarely gets personal, and even when it does it can be forgotten about. I hope you feel that way about this incident too. There is someone posting at the moment who doesn't seem to follow this etiquette and they cause me far more irritation and distress than you do.
already forgotten.
You can't keep boards the same, unless you don't allow new members. And boards need new members, as old members fade away.
My kiddo is behaving in a generally sickly fashion, and among other things, he keeps refusing all forms of food and instead asking for water, water, more water. When he gets it, he chugs it until he starts to spit it back up. This is upsetting because a friend of mine has a young child who is diabetic, and this is how it started for her. I'm keeping a very close eye on how much he drinks and how much he pees out in the next 12 hours or so. Realistically, does my kid have diabetes? No. [size=1]But that's what my friend thought too.[/size] :(
oh, yes, that is worrying! I hate it when the kiddos get sick.
What is upsetting me today? A college boy is chasing after my 16yo daughter. I think I may have to hurt him.
I spent the first three hours of my shift surfing the net, reading the Philadelphia Bulletin (yay, it's back), and taking a few inconsequential phone calls. The next four and a quarter hours were filled by an agitated ranting blind guy, a non-verbal severe MR, and the possibility of a self-mutilative teen with autism.
I go home in 45 minutes if all goes well.
It usually doesn't.
Today I saw a guy lying on the sidewalk, spread eagled, with one hand on a suitcase.
Went to check if he was ok, said he was, but the sight of it was pretty upsetting. :(
did it go well?
Almost, but not quite.
I kept my head ducked down under the desk, wrote furiously, refused to answer the phone, and then spent some time hiding in the copier room.
By doing this with a great amount of skill, I managed to leave only 1/2 hour late.
Today I saw a guy lying on the sidewalk, spread eagled, with one hand on a suitcase.
Went to check if he was ok, said he was, but the sight of it was pretty upsetting. :(
What's upsetting me? It's not yet June and it's EIGHTY-THREE DEGREES OUT! My cleavage sweat is becoming a real problem.
83? That's not too bad. Memphis in the summer. 101 degrees and 98% humidity. That sucks.
What's bugging me is that I am in my office and not in Hawaii.
My boss playing god is really pissing me off.
Are you sure he/she is not god? I am thinking of having a name plaque put on my door so others won't get confused.
83? That's not too bad. Memphis in the summer. 101 degrees and 98% humidity. That sucks.
Yes, but you didn't address the Cleavage Sweat problem.
Are you sure he/she is not god? I am thinking of having a name plaque put on my door so others won't get confused.
I think she might actually be Flash Gordon (cue soundtrack...Flash! Aahhhhhh, Savior of the universe! da duh da duh da duh...Flash...)
That is outside of my realm of expertise. See, I only have to worry about cleavage sweat when I am actually enjoying some cleavage. At that point most everything else is sweaty also.
I love a good Flash Gordon reference.
I think she might actually be Flash Gordon (cue soundtrack...Flash! Aahhhhhh, Savior of the universe! da duh da duh da duh...Flash...)
LOL! Flash Gordon! Oh, hahaha, the visual! :)
Tis raining and only 22C and the pool opens tomorrow. We've all been working so hard (it's a small non-profit neighborhood pool) and crappy weather on opening day could be a death sentence -we need a good year.
Sneak preview for the workers tonight -toenails are painted, trying to keep optimistic.....
I have officially declared vacation for the rest of the day. Oh, I'll be here, but I am not doing one more thing. No questions answered (I'm always wrong anyway.) No documents verified. I think I'll go play Pogo. And no time off card filled out. :mad:
My paperclips are screwing. In all positions.
I hate it that my paperclips are getting more action than I am.
My paperclips are screwing. In all positions.
I hate it that my paperclips are getting more action than I am.
:biglaugha
I just looked at my paperclips. You're right! :eek:
yeah, they're like teenagers. horny little buggers who spend all night screwing, and then look at you in the morning all innocent, like, "what?"
Puh, I'm on to them! Don't even get me started on the binder clips!
Don't even get me started on the binder clips!
this has disturbing implications for cross-species mating!
Next thing someone is going to start a thread demanding tough legislation and anti-marriage laws for paper clips and binder clips. They're all clips; what does the color of their coating or their metal orientation have to do with anything? It's hard enough to find love in the, er...drawer. :)
special news report: "Office Supplies caught in sex scandal!"
Seriously, though, those binder clips can be used as sex toys, ya know. Seriously.
I think my toxic feet have finally ruined my fake Crocs.
I washed the shoes carefully last night, and had clean, talcum powdered feet fresh from the bath this morning - by midday there was already a sour tang of vinegar in the shop, coming from the region of my feet. They must have become impregnated with the smell.
I am only still alive because I've become immune to it over the years.
yeah, they're like teenagers. horny little buggers who spend all night screwing, and then look at you in the morning all innocent, like, "what?"
I can't find any of mine. I think they must've slunk off behind the desk.....
okay, I'm not really upset about this, but: Why does PC Magazine have the buggiest, slowest site around? Pretty ironic.
Next thing someone is going to start a thread demanding tough legislation and anti-marriage laws for paper clips and binder clips. They're all clips; what does the color of their coating or their metal orientation have to do with anything? It's hard enough to find love in the, er...drawer. :)
OMG! I think I've been flamed! Where's the fire extinguisher! :bonk:
I can't find any of mine. I think they must've slunk off behind the desk.....
they've run away from home because you don't approve and they HATE you!
I cant breathe through my nose and I have snot...LOADSSSSSS of snot
I'm cramping and everybody pisses me off. And I hate TV!
She finally had to go home today. Three-and-a-half days . . . now *sniff* the same amount of time apart.
um . . . be sure and drink plenty of fluids?
Men are shitting me. All men...anything with a penis. Penises are shitting me!
It's back to work tomorrow after a holiday weekend.....Grim
Today I saw a guy lying on the sidewalk, spread eagled, with one hand on a suitcase.
Went to check if he was ok, said he was, but the sight of it was pretty upsetting. :(
then what happened?
Almost, but not quite.
I kept my head ducked down under the desk, wrote furiously, refused to answer the phone, and then spent some time hiding in the copier room.
By doing this with a great amount of skill, I managed to leave only 1/2 hour late.
lol...good job!
Are you sure he/she is not god? I am thinking of having a name plaque put on my door so others won't get confused.
:lol:
OMG! I think I've been flamed! Where's the fire extinguisher! :bonk:
Huh-uh...I was just continuing what I thought was the funny story brought on by your coitally connected clips! :confused:
"call back only" tech "support" only to have the normal false starts and runarounds be conducted at a voicemail exchange pace. just shoot me now.
there's no story, because they all ran away from home!
after months of driving around with a broken headlight and an expired inspection sticker, I was pulled over twice w/i 18 hours. :( I think the last time I was ticketed was in 1990.
one of our guys retired yesterday - he is going to be missed alot:(
Ordering back up c/ds for my desktop today..."IF they have them", the support person said.
IF is a big word right now.
I was sooo wrong yesterday! In my "What's making you happy today?" post I thought for sure I was getting out of these casts!!! Wrong! Four more weeks! AAAaarrRRrggGgGGghhhHhhh!!! :thepain2:
http://cellar.org/showpost.php?p=348996&postcount=129Oh man, thirstysoul. I had a double compound fracture of my right arm a couple years ago. That was enough of a pain in the butt.
Keep smiling, hang in there!:comfort:
Oh man, thirstysoul. I had a double compound fracture of my right arm a couple years ago. That was enough of a pain in the butt.
Keep smiling, hang in there!:comfort:
Thanks Shawnee123...hey, a little more behind the ear please...ahhhh, thanks!:D
$217 just to get my headlight fixed.
Boo!
Three days hospitalized following a stroke.
Just got home.
rkz,
I'm sorry to hear that and I hope you're ok. This puts any complaints I might have had into a different perspective.
rkz,
I'm sorry to hear that and I hope you're ok. This puts any complaints I might have had into a different perspective.
We all have our stuff and every level of complaint is legitimate IMO.
I'm home, this morning I had another bad EKG, my heart could be damaged from the stroke. I need more tests. My head, neck and left arm are killing me. I'm tired and having trouble resting. Other than that, I'm ok.:yelsick:
Sucks, I had it five min. into our first date in months.
rkz, hope your feeling better soon.
I'm worried about my family.
I cannot express how fortunate I am to have them and how much I hate that they have to be put through this.
rkz - sorry to to hear what you've been through, especially since it spoilt a date for you. I do hope you get back on track.
Hugs.
I'm sorry. I can't imagine.
Do you have life insurance?
Is your speech okay?
I do not have life insurance any longer. Lost it after the last insurance change. My speech returned fully during the second day.
hmm. well--good news/bad news. But the best news is you're still around to kick us around!
My friend Alex is leaving back to Germany (he's an exchange student) and I am going to the airport to say goodbye...gah...it's going to be emotional.
The whole family has a head cold.
Three days hospitalized following a stroke.
Just got home.
Sorry to hear that. Hope you are better now.
got ripped off buying a dvd on ebay. grrr.
Shaved patches all over my chest after a four hour stress test and all that that entailed.
The dopey check out chick at the local shops didn't put my payment for my purchase through properly so I had to unload all my groceries so they could all be scanned again.
What a waste of time. :(
I hope your tests went well today besides the associated hair loss rkz.
I will know soon. They were yesterday actually, very painful for me. Other than that, ok.
I will know soon. They were yesterday actually, very painful for me. Other than that, ok.
Good luck man, keep your chin up.
We just visited a friend who did not mention she had two sick children until we got there. But no no, don't worry, it's bacterial and they've already been on antibiotics for 5 days so they're no longer contagious.
This morning we are all showing symptoms.
One of my buddies has a back condition that looks like it could cripple him in the long run. Please don't run marathons if you find yourself laid up after.:headshake
Sorry to post this after other people's serious posts involving health. But. Well, it's the nature of the thread, right?
I forgot that Hot Fuzz was out on dvd today.
One of my Things to Do when I went into town was go & buy it and start a series of watching it with every available commentary (bound to be a few of them) when I got back tonight.
Instead I went wandering round looking at pink shoes (no idea) and then went into the internet cafe to kill time with you chaps. Remebered at precisely 18.31 when the cafe was closing and all the shops had closed. So I've come back here (the shop I work in, I am allowed access after hours) to waste my time with you a bit more.
The main disappointment - I'm not free to go and get myself a bit of Pegg until SUNDAY now. Sheesh.
SG - I saw Hot Fuzz a few weeks ago. I thought it was very well done, and we recognized a lot of actors from Shaun of the Dead. I will probably also get it when it comes out on DVD. I wonder if it's being released in the US now, also.
Had to put Jacquelita's old dog to sleep yesterday night, 3am.
The old boy put in his time, but he had just about everything a dog could have wrong - cancer, fused spine, arthritic legs. Yesterday night he sprained his front knee joint badly and couldn't move without a great deal of pain. The emergency vet agreed, it was time.
Bud will be remembered as a good dog who would not hurt a soul, who provided companionship to his family. He'll also be remembered as that dog who would lick his own feet incessantly, until he was basically eating them, and had to go into an E-collar. But mostly, he'll be remembered as having helped to define Jacquelita's life, when she rescued him from an abusive owner and put up with his various resulting mental issues, to give him a good long life he could enjoy.
Love your pets.
Sorry for your and J's loss. Pets are part of a family, and their loss is hard to take.
SG - I saw Hot Fuzz a few weeks ago. I thought it was very well done, and we recognized a lot of actors from Shaun of the Dead. I will probably also get it when it comes out on DVD. I wonder if it's being released in the US now, also.
Not til July 31. After Harry Potter for you!
I'll give you my opinion on the commentaries in the Hot Fuzz thread once I've watched it ALL Sunday
Did you recognise Rafe Spall?
It took me til halfway through the film to click - am useless with faces though. He had a moustache, which is as good as extensive surgery to someone like me.
He's also quite buffed up now - hope to see him in other films soon (he's son of a very well known British actor Timothy Spall, who you might only know as Peter Pettigrew/ Scabbers in Harry potter films)
UT - sorry to hear that.
Glad to hear he was given a good life and died well loved.
Sorry for your loss, UT.
It sounds like the happiness was mutually given. Warm thoughts to you and yours.
love your pets, while you can.
not enough sleep, because I stayed up too late reading.
The Cellar. I'm about to give up.
jaq:
My condolences to you both.
Thanks to everyone for the support. Bud was a good dog. He was one of those dogs who was a lover - he wouldn't harm a soul and would do anything for a scratch behind the ears.
I'll miss him...
love your pets, while you can.
not enough sleep, because I stayed up too late reading.
The Cellar. I'm about to give up.
Why Cloud??? Honestly, I would like to know??
I do seriously wonder what you perceive you
arent getting from the cellar???
Sorry for you loss UT and J....its awful to say to goodbye to a four legged family member.
Not upset...maybe miffed is a better word. And tired.
Little rap rap rap on my door last night. Ex b/f apparently had parked behind my house and walked up the street to the restaurant/bar near me and drank some beer until they kicked him out. It was almost midnight. I was asleep. I haven't gotten to the point yet where I don't let him in, but I don't do backflips because he decided to grace me with his presence anymore, either.
I don't know if he wanted a booty call or food, but he was getting neither. I said "I'm tired" and he said "Well so am I." I can see where a full day of drinking would make you more tired than say, a JOB.
Finally an hour later he left. He muttered a curt "I'm sorry to interrupt you" and slammed the door a bit.
SO all about him. I could be laying there dying and his concern would be himself.
Thanks for the vent time.
I can see where a full day of drinking would make you more tired than say, a JOB.
SMACK DOWN!
Thanks to everyone for the support. Bud was a good dog. He was one of those dogs who was a lover - he wouldn't harm a soul and would do anything for a scratch behind the ears.
I'll miss him...
I know how it hurts to love a pet.
...... best wishes as you heal.
Not upset...just annoyed.
During my morning coffee at a local coffee shop a bird pooped on my head. (right before work)
The two people I told that to said that it's "good luck".
I'm standing there about to vomit with bird dung dripping off my bangs and someone says, "hey that's good luck".
Go f*** yourself.
Sorry about the language but that's exactly what came to mind.
Cicero -- was it a Foo bird?
I think they were shitting you. :)
It is lucky! If you didn't like it on your bangs, well, you're lucky it wasn't the Bluebird of Happiness!
The funny part is, I knew exactly what it was as soon as it hit. Like this happens all the time..... I just sat there and thought........I know that that's bird doody....I don't even have to check. Great. Then I freaked out.
Birdie, birdie, in the sky,
Why'd you do that in my eye?
I'm not mad, and I won't cry,
I'm just glad that cows don't fly.
That's such crap (pardon the pun)--I hate it when people take something bad and try to pretend that it's actually good by claiming it's "good luck." Like the Italians say it's good luck when it rains on your wedding day. No, honey, that's just what they're telling you so you don't cry and smear your makeup. And when I was in high school, a Chinese friend of mine told me that traditionally in China it was good luck to find broken eggshell pieces in your baking. I asked her why all the women in China were in denial about being terrible cooks. [/rant]
Little rap rap rap on my door last night. Ex b/f apparently had parked behind my house and walked up the street to the restaurant/bar near me and drank some beer until they kicked him out.
I don't know if he wanted a booty call or food, but he was getting neither. I said "I'm tired" and he said "Well so am I. Finally an hour later he left.
Do I even have to say it chick, or can you work it out from the above :)
I know - and you know I know - how difficult it is when habit/ affection/ innate courtesy kicks in. But he behaved badly, it ticked you off, but
you let him.
You are the only one who can stop this happening again.
Next time pretend he has a paranoid, homicidal new girlfriend and by calling round he is putting both his and your life in danger. You'd find the strength to tell him he can't come in quite easily in that situation.
Anyway, you don't want advice. You have my sympathy for the disturbed night. I rolled over about 05.00 and got bitten on the shoulder because of it. By my cat. I certainly deserve sympathy!
*sends sympathy to Sundae* Last night I was trying to sleep....too hot.....started to drift off about 4 am and that's when my dog jumped on my bed, almost landing on my head....it had suddenly started raining really hard and he was scared in case of thunder (rubbish dog). He then curled into a tiny ball and shiverd uncontrollably for about half an hour.
On a more serious note: rk, hope you're feeling better. I know it must be horribly worrying, and i won't even pretend to know how you feel, but am thinking of you. Jacquelita, I really sympathise, it's the worst part of having a dog in your family. I just wish they could live as long as we do.
The house next to mine (and the factory behind) are being pulled down. It's tricky work as they are working around existing structures but there is a lot of collapsing walls, smashing glass and shouts from workmen over the last few weeks.
They start at any time from 08.00-09.00 which is when I get up/ leave the flat and are done by 17.00 (I get home 17.30). So my poor babbas face it all alone. It's made them very clingy, so I've started letting them in with me at night. I feel guiltier than ever that they're well behaved most nights (except when I roll on them).
my toilet is running. I had to stop it by putting a stick under the floater arm. Will now have to clean my entire apartment to get the maintenance in.
about a 2 week job! :)
I got up at 6:00 am this beautiful Saturday morning and fed my family (biscuits, ham, sausage, & eggs) and am now sitting alone in the hearth room (it's now 11:00am) with nothing but the Cellar to entertain me...and no one in my house has said Happy Father's Day to me, yet. :(
So to all of you Dad's out there...Happy Father's Day!
I got up at 6:00 am this beautiful Saturday morning and fed my family (biscuits, ham, sausage, & eggs) and am now sitting alone in the hearth room (it's now 11:00am) with nothing but the Cellar to entertain me...and no one in my house has said Happy Father's Day to me, yet. :(
So to all of you Dad's out there...Happy Father's Day!
I thought that that was tomorrow.
yeah, Father's Day is tomorrow!
yeah, Father's Day is tomorrow!
Okay, did I mention I haven't slept but 3 hours in 2.5 days? I think I am delirious[FONT=Verdana]...[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana][/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana]We celebrate Father's Day on Sat due to father-in-law travels and is only home Friday afternoon-Sunday AM, so only have Sat night to spend with him. So our family celebrates a day early...we've been doing it so long I forgot I am not on same schedule as rest of the USA. [/FONT]
Maybe it's time for a nap?
ah! well, Happy Father's Day, then.
they'll get around to it, I'm sure.
go take a nap--you're entitled. After all, it's (sorta) Father's Day.
I woke up upset this am. Sad
Maybe if I cast it off it can finally go away.
I didn't go out for along time because of getting hurt. I've been working on my self esteem I've been feeling better about things. I decided to be a good role model and to make my life more full I allowed myself to meet some one. I guess I trusted too quickly the first person that walked my way.
He gave me every indication that everything was ok. In the beginning I personally felt as though we were better friends than a couple I was given assurances. I should have listened to my gut. Then without notice he told me to fuck off. Give me your key, I don't want to talk to you any more. The reason? ( because I had gotten upset he hung up on me)
I would have appologized if he had of told me I was mistaken and he was hurt but it was a cheap email break up. Email of which he always said he dosn't like to communicate through.
I felt as though he created a crisis in order to break up. It was a total 360 degree turn. He changed in a blink of an eye. To be straight up and not contriving...honest and trustworthy he wasn't/ couldn't , didn't want too instead he lied and was after something else. ( a women with money and time to go play) is my guess. What he told me was a load of new age bullshit that skirted around the true issue.
I am so confused. I mean it would be harder for me to get evicted from my apartment or fired from my job. Relationships are not this fragile. So he was lying to me this whole time about caring.
The irony is that he would use this logic. You have bad luck. The fact that I can just blow you off is proof that you were born under a bad sign. You are poisonous to my welfare but if you want to be even friends you must appologize for your tone of voice when I hung up on you.
I am so serious. It's so ridiculous I have decided I was going with a crazy man. A 54 year old 3 times married childless unemployed crazy person but it still hurts like hell.
thanks for listening
You must have the bad guy syndrome I have.
Fuck him, he's not worth it. You deserve a real man, not some pussy-footin' jobless mealy-mouthed spineless jelly fish.
Yep, this is why I don't "date."
Hang in there, sky. When you least expect it you'll meet a good guy.
Same thoughts from me Sidhe.
I worry that you would get involved with someone with so little to offer - the most glaring omission being any integrity.
You still have my full sympathy - hurt is hurt, whether it's over Prince Charming or a total shit.
You must have the bad guy syndrome I have.
Yes I must. I have no idea why. I am really nice, plain spoken but nice down to earth.
I still have my best friend friend in Canada. My original poetry partner. He is the true prince although we are great loving friends.
Funny you should mention princes because I was thinking I have kissed many frogs.
Same thoughts from me Sidhe.
I worry that you would get involved with someone with so little to offer - the most glaring omission being any integrity.
I worry about this as well.
I actually tried to just be friends but he used his new age crap to tell me otherwise. He made alot of promises in the begining he never kept. He used his weath as if it could impress me but never spent any except on himself. He would brag about this thing or that then warp into an ego speach about possessions as if that explains why he would never treat me.
I told him this was bull.....s.....I tried to call as you can imagine but he refused to talk to me on the phone. He would just email and say my upsetness about it was proof that I was this or that.
I am too worried because I like sex so much I was easy ( he says) although it might be years before I take a partner. I should have known by his lack of lovemaking skills. He would just lay there and let me do all the work...which honestly if I thought it was turning someone on I don't mind.
It's all so clear.Hindsight is so 20/20. I am wondering.
How can I learn?
so ...I am on lunch giving more information than I should.
thanks for the support Shawnee and Sundae. I'm ok. Just going to go back to being a nun again. :p
Sky - sorry you have to go through this luvie.
I meant to ask the circumstances when I saw you mentioned that this guy broke up with you over a hung up. You deserve sooo much better than him and are certainly better off without him...but SG is right (as usual), hurt is hurt.
I'm soooo tired and shitty tempered today....no sleep after the guy I have been seeing started acting weird and I fronted him...to find his ex girlfriend (ex of 6 mths) is 6.5mths pregnant. They didnt break up as such, but she just disappeared and guess what...now shes back.
Its not s'posed to be this hard is it?
I'm sorry you are going through this, I hope you feel better soon.
Expect from others what you think they should expect of you.
Its not s'posed to be this hard is it?
The depressing part is the older you and prospective lovers get, the more baggage everyone is carrying. That just makes things harder.
ahhhh, that sucks for all you ladies. There are some complete bastards out there who do a disservice to the male population.
You're right Ducks.......it isn't supposed to be that hard. Sounds like one of those times you wish you were all around the corner from each other and could go out for dinner and have a bit of a bitch session and a few bottles of red!
What's upsetting me today doesn't seem to compare to the shit that has been thrown your way girls, so i'll keep it to myself :)
Spill it TSM!! Its all good in the bitch thread.
FWIW, I hold no grudges against the guy I was seeing, he was in the dark about the pregnancy until just last week and was working things out in his head...just shitty timing is all.
It just baffles me at times, that its not simple like it used to be.
Yeah, youre right Bruce, with age comes baggage, and I dont mind baggage so much...if you didnt have baggage at this stage, to me, that would signify deeper problems.
true that, rk,bruce,ducks
I'm soooo tired and shitty tempered today....no sleep after the guy I have been seeing started acting weird and I fronted him...to find his ex girlfriend (ex of 6 mths) is 6.5mths pregnant. They didnt break up as such, but she just disappeared and guess what...now shes back.
Its not s'posed to be this hard is it?
ah man....*hugs for the hurt ducks*
Good thing is the memory will fade. There's still time to find beauty in things if we just look for them.
[edit- To be fair to him I realized from the beginning it wouldn't work. I saw the future. I am a single working mother and he is a footloose and free male who dates girly girls which isn't me so I am the stupid one for letting him have his way instead of laughing in his face when he asked me out to begin with. Totally not my type. Aries / Scorpio mix dosn't work. I'm earthy. He's nuts. ]
yeah TSM...misery loves company don'cha know.
it's gona seem silly, so trivial but it's pissing me off totally.
Do i go to Darwin for a weekend with 2 mates at the begining of August or do I not. On one hand it's Darwin cup - which should be wild, but on the other hand it's AUD 650 bucks just for airfare, plus i'm only going for 5 days.
I can't decide if 650 bucks so too expensive for airfares for just five days............when you include the extra cash for socialising then it's an expensive excercise.
Why can I not make a decision.
Dammit - i need a beer.
But as i said......not in the same ballpark as you lasses.
I say go for it!! Money is money and can be replaced. Memories are priceless. :)
Darwins awesome!!! Do it!!
Although, $650 is fairly expensive, I flew up there for $350 in March.
yeah I thought $650 was a bit pricey - they're trying to sting me prolly because the cup's on the same weekend.
See, i agree with you also sky, memories last a lifetime so it would be pretty cool.
I dunno, i've been thinking more since i posted and i'm slowly talking myself out of it. Maybe i'm being put off by the heat, and my damn pasty skin......haha, us redheads have all the fun.
arrrghgghh this is a hard one. Might toss a coin and leave it to chance.
It sounds like you don't WANT to go.
?
The five-year-old has become very jealous of the toddler and is acting out physically against him. It's still within the range of normal and not a long-term concern, but it's hugely upsetting.
Had a caudal vs lumbar (sp?) epidural again today... OUCH!
That is the one where they punch a big needle through your coccyx and pump fluid into your epidural space.
Mine is really small, birth defect, and it feels like my spine is in a vice for three days.
The whole process sucks.
I have to stuff 500 envelopes today for a bankruptcy mailing.
Okay, I know that's trivial compared to yours, Rob. Sorry you have to suffer. Hope it's worth it!
Not trivial at all... all I have to do now is lie here and be all, like, "this sucks, ow".
Sorry about the mailing, hope you don't get cut too much.
well, as long as you're lying there, you could help me.
Wanna lick?
:)
Not gonna' think it... not... damn
Thinking about it..
I've been very arrogant and trying to use my cane more instead of my wheelchair... I think I damaged myself worse doing it.
Between that and my implants battery dying, I really think the new pain level is what cause the stroke.
I hope this helps.
The five-year-old has become very jealous of the toddler and is acting out physically against him. It's still within the range of normal and not a long-term concern, but it's hugely upsetting.
I'll tell you this because I have a degree in Early Childhood ed and not because I like to watch Supper Nanny :p
A 5 year old is way old enough to understand the concept of 'US'
SO make him/her a co partner with the two of you. Something special like a job to help with the baby like tokens in a jar or stickers. You can make her something special just for her and when she is nice to the baby she can have them. Every time she is nice it needs to be noted and tracked. A job just like mom and dad have jobs to do with the baby.
That's very basic but something like that will work if she is made to feel a part of a team. Like you need her help SO much but she'll need a tangible reward for appropriate behavior. Something she can see and collect. ...the collection part is a biggie. A jar or poster board of rewards she can look at always. :)
Thanks sky, but it's beyond being nice or not, he already resents being asked to help in any way with the toddler. He will wait very patiently until we are turned away for a second, then shove him down, or pinch, or hit him, and then claims it was an accident when the baby starts screaming.
It has gotten more under control now though--as always, this kid doesn't respond to punishments very well, but he especially seemed to respond to the one lecture where he was accused of being a "bully," that word really upset him and he's been behaving better since.
I sounds like you have it under control then. I am sorry you're having a rough time of it.
Thinking about it..
I've been very arrogant and trying to use my cane more instead of my wheelchair... I think I damaged myself worse doing it.
Between that and my implants battery dying, I really think the new pain level is what cause the stroke.
I hope this helps.
Yes. It does help. Someone's pain level causing their stroke just because they were trying to be more mobile really makes me feel like a douche for thinking I ever had a problem.:redface:
Thank you for the sincerity- I rarely get to come across it.
Three days hospitalized following a stroke.
Just got home.
Thinking about it..
I've been very arrogant and trying to use my cane more instead of my wheelchair... I think I damaged myself worse doing it.
Between that and my implants battery dying, I really think the new pain level is what cause the stroke.
I hope this helps.
I didn't realize you had a stroke! I am so sorry. I am glad you are better.
I am curious as to HOW using your cane and your pain level caused your stroke.
Blood pools???
coming back to carrollton after spending 4 days on the beach.. I do not like being landlocked..
I think just pain causes a stress on the system, right?
I yield back the balance of my time to the chair.
Same thoughts from me Sidhe.
I worry that you would get involved with someone with so little to offer - the most glaring omission being any integrity.
I am trying to save my face here...within myself I came up with these thoughts so I can go on with self confidence. I believe these things to be true SG.
I don't think I addressed this to my comfort level because I didn't go out with someone 'abusive' to begin with. Does anyone?
His mild passive aggressive traits were putting him on the friendship tract with me. He was good to my kid.
I worry that you would get involved with someone with so little to offer
about "t
he most glarring omission being any integrity"
How would I have known that before this occured?
We never fought !
We never fought...not in 8 or 9 months. This wasn't something I put up with. It was a bizzare one time happening.
We were good friends. ( I thought ) I thought we were moving into good friend territory where it should have been. We were old enough and mature enough to accomodate and modify the relationship ( thought) I couldn't have known those things before the fact because the behavior like that wasn't anything that had happened before.
I spoke my mind. I didn't swear or yell. This fact tells me he was guilty and deflecting...the cowardly breakup happened after.
As for any reasons of his deficiet of character before the break up told me we were better friends so I think I was on the right tract?
I was establishing us as friends. I was being tolerant.
When I could not tolerate rude behavoir that is when the shizzle hit the fan. I could not have known that from the 9 months prior.
I think my judgement is pretty good considering the facts.
He contrived a breakup. I didn't see it comming. Yes he was a cheap bastard but what guy isn't?
Yes he was a cheap bastard but what guy isn't?
I beg your pardon? Would you care to explain just what constitutes being a "cheap bastard"?
ahh lol.....ah no not really. :blush:
I plead the 5th on details.
.....but I'll give you a hint. I go too far in the opposite direction of not appearing financially needy. I would cut off my very nose to spite my face.
Let's just say I can be a bigger man than my cheap bastard date. lol
That doesn't explain;
Yes he was a cheap bastard [COLOR="Red"]but what guy isn't[/COLOR]?
I guess I'll have to retract that part Bruce :) I can't think of a good reason to stick to it.
.....but that isn't upsetting.
Today I have to type out the reasons why I am qualified for a job I am not really qualified for. Tomorrow I have a group interview. I've done panels before but not with peers. It's three and a half hours long and I am just not into it.
I am already hired as a substitute teachers assistant for the fall. I am looking for a part time steady hour position within that and have more confidence that this is the way I should go. The other job is a crap shoot. It's like playing the lottery. If I go I go just for the experience. :(
I am truly upset. I was expecting my certification letter in the mail. I just got a letter from the state ed dept explaining that I wouldn't be getting my certification until I take a super secret extra-special test. A test which will not be available until August. I've worked within the system. I drove almost 2 hours one way for a full semester after graduation to finish all my requirements. The cert officer at the Uni said I was all done. The system was bad enough when the democrats owned it but now that the GOP connected ETS is in the mix any wavering off the normal path is punished... severely.
That sucks, Griff. Has anyone else ever heard of the super secret test?
I'm sorry Griff. Will this affect your employment situation (i.e., are you on a normal "school" cycle that starts in August/September or is your type of job year-round?)
What's upsetting me tonight is I tried to make a new fried-fish-thing recipe for dinner and it failed spectacularly. I mean really spectacularly; it was only barely edible.
My certification officer is in China so a quick answer on this is not coming. If I have to take the test, it is in leau of a PA form that was to have been filled out during student teaching. Unfortunately, I student taught through a NY school. I had a further student teaching requirement through the PA uni but I guess that when I did it the form wasn't part of the normal mix or wasn't filled out. I can understand how my cert officer dropped the ball because the state rules are a morass, but I specifically asked about this test and was assured that it was not necessary for certification.
At this point I was supposed to have my PA cert in hand. My interviews in New York State have been based on the assumtion that my PA cert was pending and I could seek NY cert based on that. I could be hired if the school wants to fight with the NY dept of Ed saying that a QUALIFIED candidate was unavailable. Yes I do have a Masters of Ed in Special Ed but not taking GWB's major donor's test makes me unqualified to teach in the field.
I'm no longer upset. I'm back in that familiar place of resignation. I will do whatever the man says... Note: If I take this test it will be my sixth ETS test this year @ 50 to 115 bucks per. At least they were all very easy, you know, meaningless.
This too shall pass... you'll be cracking the whip and putting the little vermin though their paces before you know it, Griff.
I broke the passenger side mirror on my brother's truck while using it today. Fortunately, it's a simple mirror--no heating or electronics. But it's still gonna cost me just under $100 to fix it. :(
Sprint.... man, where to start!
well Griff, at least you know you'll pass the thing when it comes!At least you didn't take up chef school and that fish dish was your final.:p
I'm no longer upset. I'm back in that familiar place of resignation. I will do whatever the man says... Note: If I take this test it will be my sixth ETS test this year @ 50 to 115 bucks per. At least they were all very easy, you know, meaningless.
That sucks, bro. Hopefully, this will be the last hurdle you have to jump...for a while, anyway. :)
Thanks for the kind words all.:)
HLJ & Wolf - are hatin'
jester - I'm sorry if I was evil. First I insult Perry Winkle, now you. I'm just going to unplug my keyboard and restrict myself to mouse operation.
Damn it. Possible TMI -->[COLOR="White"]Not only did I get my period again, it came early. [/COLOR]Grrrr.
jester - I'm sorry if I was evil. First I insult Perry Winkle, now you. I'm just going to unplug my keyboard and restrict myself to mouse operation.
puleeeze - if that's the worst i get from you guys, i'm in great shape;)
of course, i haven't been trashed by lj yet, so......
HLJ? Whadja do now?
To LR [COLOR="White"]Crap. Aren't you trying to conceive? Bummer. [/COLOR]
HLJ? Whadja do now?
I made a joke that was not nice. See
here, posts 274 to 277. But I think wolf was serious.
Tha' Goo.
And I have another sleep test tonight. I hate them.
Sorry, LR. I totally feel your pain.
Damn it. Possible TMI -->[COLOR="White"]Not only did I get my period again, it came early. [/COLOR]Grrrr.
Are you taking anything LR? Like Vitex Agnus....its awesome for helping with these things.
Morons. Refer to
Flint's thread in Technology, and know that I posted my comment to that before this shit occurred.
After a very painful upgrade to our college wide system, I've finally worked the bugs out of my processes and can TRY to get caught up. So I'm running about 12 letters. Our tiny little department printer is in use, by Idiot. I ask Idiot how many letters she was planning to run. Duh, she says, blank and stupid looking, SEVEN HUNDRED. This is the FA printer, but of course other departments use it...no problem for small jobs. It's about 10 years old and very small. There is a BIG printer for use in our suite for BIG jobs. But, but, she couldn't get it to work. So I set it up to run my measly fucking 12 letters on letterhead. Gee, I could figure it out.
This is the dumbass who once sent about 800 letters out with the printing SO fucked up that students were calling saying if they HAD been thinking about taking classes here they had changed their minds because we're not sharp enough to send out a legible letter. This is also the dumb bitch who sent out an email to everyone on campus explaining her fuck up, complete with the sentence "Sorry for the incontinence" She invites people to "set" on the couch we give away at a basketball game every year. She created a communications code that said "dipolma miled." Those words came up for hundreds of students who needed that code in comm management.
Her title? Communications Specialist.
And she is SO far up the VP's ass that it's OK to "incontinent" the rest of the suite.
I just HAD to vent. God I hate stupid people. And I was doing SO good after vacation.
I'm done, thanks for letting me share. :eek: :rolleyes:
Morons. Refer to Flint's thread in Technology, and know that I posted my comment to that before this shit occurred.
After a very painful upgrade to our college wide system, I've finally worked the bugs out of my processes and can TRY to get caught up. So I'm running about 12 letters. Our tiny little department printer is in use, by Idiot. I ask Idiot how many letters she was planning to run. Duh, she says, blank and stupid looking, SEVEN HUNDRED. This is the FA printer, but of course other departments use it...no problem for small jobs. It's about 10 years old and very small. There is a BIG printer for use in our suite for BIG jobs. But, but, she couldn't get it to work. So I set it up to run my measly fucking 12 letters on letterhead. Gee, I could figure it out.
This is the dumbass who once sent about 800 letters out with the printing SO fucked up that students were calling saying if they HAD been thinking about taking classes here they had changed their minds because we're not sharp enough to send out a legible letter. This is also the dumb bitch who sent out an email to everyone on campus explaining her fuck up, complete with the sentence "Sorry for the incontinence" She invites people to "set" on the couch we give away at a basketball game every year. She created a communications code that said "dipolma miled." Those words came up for hundreds of students who needed that code in comm management.
Her title? Communications Specialist.
And she is SO far up the VP's ass that it's OK to "incontinent" the rest of the suite.
I just HAD to vent. God I hate stupid people. And I was doing SO good after vacation.
I'm done, thanks for letting me share. :eek: :rolleyes:
HUGS! [laughs! go on, you know you can!]
:redface:
I'm much better now. That woman is just so....ARGH! :)
This is also the dumb bitch who sent out an email to everyone on campus explaining her fuck up, complete with the sentence "Sorry for the incontinence"
:lol: I just remembered that I got an e-mail from a vendor once after they screwed up, sending their apologies for any incontinence I had experienced because of them.
I hear kegels are supposed to be good for that.
;)
I hear kegels are supposed to be good for that.
;)
I'd heard that too. So, I tried it, but found out I had mis-heard it. I was trying something with bagels. Don't ask.
now, that's what I call a yeast infection!
Article found in Pub Med. Interesting. Never heard of the herb. Unfortunately, it also seems to be studied for it's psychiatric effects as well, so given my mental history doubtful I'd mess with it. Thanks for the heads up though, DN.
Forsch Komplementarmed. 1998;5(6):272-278.
Mastodynon(R) bei weiblicher Sterilität.
Gerhard I, Patek A, Monga B, Blank A, Gorkow C.
Mastodynon(R) for Female Infertility. Randomized, Placebo-Controlled, Clinical Double-Blind Study [COLOR="red"]OBJECTIVE AND DESIGN[/COLOR]: The effects of Mastodynon(R), an Agnus castus-containing preparation, were investigated in 96 women with fertility disorders in a prospective, randomized, placebo-controlled, double-blind study. [COLOR="red"]PATIENTS AND METHODS:[/COLOR] 38 women with secondary amenorrhoea, 31 women with luteal insuffciency and 27 women with idiopathic infertility received 30 drops of Mastodynon or placebo twice a day over a period of 3 months. [COLOR="red"]OUTCOME MEASURE AND RESULTS:[/COLOR] The outcome measure, which was pregnancy or spontaneous menstruation in women with amenorrhoea and pregnancy or improved concentrations of luteal hormones in both other groups, was achieved in 31 out of 66 women who were suitable for evaluation. It was achieved more often in the Mastodynon group compared to the placebo group (57.6% versus 36.0%, p = 0.069). 15 women conceived during the observation period (n = 7 with amenorrhoea, n = 4 with idiopathic infertility, n = 4 with luteal insufficiency). In women with amenorrhoea or luteal insufficiency, pregnancy occurred in the Mastodynon group more than twice as often as in the placebo group. Under therapy no hormonal changes were found at a 5% significance level. Only very few undesirable drug effects were observed. [COLOR="Red"]CONCLUSION: In women with sterility due to secondary amenorrhoea and luteal insufficiency, a treatment with Mastodynon can be recommended over a period of 3 to 6 months.[/COLOR]
A school in my ward is facing closure. It is almost certain that it and another school will be replaced by an academy. I have such grave misgivings about an academy for this community. The high levels of permanent exclusions, the reluctance to deal with Special Educational Needs...I'm not even going to talk about my political objections, these are are serious, operational concerns. I fear, and I hope I'm wrong, that the same children whom we have failed to reach with the comprehensive school are the ones who won't be admitted to, or retained within their local academy. I'm told there are safeguards, and that we will have input as a Local Authority into the management and ethos of the school, especially if we are co-sponsors. But...I am not wholly convinced.
That said....it is an opportunity to get a large investment into education, and a chance to give a fresh start to a deeply troubled school community. Ten years of rescue attempts and super heads. Every newspaper's favourite failing school story. It's hard to see how it can be rescued in its current form. The alternative to Academies, Building Schools for the Future has our area down for new builds in 2011 (at the earliest) and there's another school in a different community whose building is severely dilapidated which will get that first shot. The 'failing' school' (I don't like that tag, it's made improvements, just such an uphill battle) is structurally sound. It could be another 6 or 7 years to get something done in ths community if we don't accept an academy. How can I not embrace £30mil investment and a chance to break this appalling cycle?
At the end of the day, I'm just one voice in a small group within one of the stakeholders. My stance probably won't make a difference either way. But, I have to be able to look my constituents in the eye when I talk to them about this.
The #$*&% neighbor kid.
Showed up at the door last night at 7 - "Wanna see my frog?!" Has a frog in tupperware with a few blades of grass.
Showed up at the door at 10am - "Wanna see my dead frog?!" :greenface
Little shit.
My kids invited him to go raspberry picking with us - he lasted 20 minutes before he was too hot, getting attcked by too many bugs, and crying from the thorns. Just dropped his ass back off with his mommy..... grrrrrrrr.....
The #$*&% neighbor kid.
Showed up at the door last night at 7 - "Wanna see my frog?!" Has a frog in tupperware with a few blades of grass.
Showed up at the door at 10am - "Wanna see my dead frog?!" :greenface
Little shit.
My kids invited him to go raspberry picking with us - he lasted 20 minutes before he was too hot, getting attcked by too many bugs, and crying from the thorns. Just dropped his ass back off with his mommy..... grrrrrrrr.....
lol...he sounds like the kid who got thrown off the airplane!
lol...he sounds like the kid who got thrown off the airplane!
Yeah, except that was a toddler wasn't it? This kid is freakin 9!
Poor little Hopkin... :sniff:
You got more than a pint of raspberrys I hope!
mmm raspberrys ...on icecream :drool:
Long talk with my wife yesterday.
We need money.
Selling some stuff.
Having to accept limitations that I have had for some time.
Have known for a while, but the reality sucks.
You got more than a pint of raspberrys I hope!
mmm raspberrys ...on icecream :drool:
Ya. We shared with Jay the Dunkin Donuts guy, and our next door neighbors, and still ended up with more than we could eat tonight.
bummer rk. I'm sorry to hear that this is added to your other woes.
Long talk with my wife yesterday.
We need money.
Selling some stuff.
Having to accept limitations that I have had for some time.
Have known for a while, but the reality sucks.
I'm sorry rk.
Ya. We shared with Jay the Dunkin Donuts guy, and our next door neighbors, and still ended up with more than we could eat tonight.
They look lovely.
Dunkin Donuts you say? We have one right down the block. I am able to pass by it most days withought stopping in.
mmmm dunkin
Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck!!
My new (3 mths old) mobile phone shat itself last nite. Which is annoying in itself, but the *oh fuck* bit is....
I will have to hand it over to some phone fixer dude to repair it ANDDDDD....its full of inappropriate pics and vids :eek:
I dont want my account manager (who is a friend of mine) to see these pics n vids!!!!
Yes, I am a dirty slurry, buts its why *y'all* love me. :cool:
The fact that every time I walk into my house now my dog isn't there to greet me and he's not here barking at every little thing trying to protect me anymore.
Not Upsetting – just going freakin insane. If I get another stupid call from:
Them – Hi, this is “so & so” from AT & T, who has joined with Bellsouth
Who there at your location takes care of your local phone service?
Me - I do
Them - Great. And your name is?
Me - Tina
Them - Hi, Tina. This is “Craig”, we would like to send a price quote to you and see if we can’t save you some money.
Tina Thanks, but I have already talked with 3 people, this week. We are happy with what we have.
Craig I’m sure. But what if, we could, save you some money? What’s your fax # and I’ll send a quote on over and you can look at it and let me know. How many lines do you have ?
Tina – 4
Craig – Do you have – Call Forward, ID, etc etc
Tina Yes
Craig Do you have DSL, blah, blah, blah
Tina Yes, T1 Line
Craig Great, I’ll send that to you.
Tina Ok, bye
5 minutes later
Hi, Tina this is Craig, did you get a chance to look over our quote and see how much money we can save you? Did you notice ALL the credits you are getting. Almost $500.00, plus $100 gift card. How about your long distance?
Tina Yes, I saw all of that. Nuvox provides our long distance, we have 200 free minutes per line – so we really don’t have any long distance charges.
Craig Well, I’m sure with all the savings we are providing you, your long distance charges will still come under the quote we gave you. How about I send over a form, for you to sign and we’ll get you switched over today?
Tina We’re happy with what we have, but I’ll keep your quote and if I decide to change over – I’ll call you. Thanks Bye.
Whew, it really helped that I typed all this out
Hey Jester- next time do what my boss did last week.
Just repeat over and over that they are really getting fu**ing annoying.
No matter what they say in response- just repeat.
Because they will call you back no matter what. If they are going to continually waste your time at least have fun with it.................
Nobody's ordering pizzas
today.
ok - I hope no one "here" works for said company:rolleyes:
I'm really tired of all the people out there who simply cannot operate their vehicles - whether it be subaru outback drivers who stop/yield inappropriately, or pickmuptruck drivers who can't stay in a lane (just pick one asshole, doesnt matter which, I'll gladly use the other), or teenage girls who are just generaly incompetant - you've all pissed me off today, and it's not even rush hour yet.
OlderSon was in minor car accident three weeks ago. Yesterday was driving home from body shop.
Into the back of a dump truck pulling out of construction zone. :smack:
Car totaled.
Girlfriend in hospital. (out now, sore, but intact thank god)
I'm done pouring money into his transportation options. Far as I'm concerned, he's a pedestrian now. Want wheels? Fine. You buy them.
Glad to hear everyone is ok, except the car.
This REALLY cute guy I just met
(Him: huh... nice bag.
Me: mm, nice hair.
That was the whole convo.)
...turns out to be fuckin' THIRTEEN.
I swear, he looks older than me. I'm real bad at this, I guess.
There is some kind of major accident or fire scene within a quarter mile of my house.
The road the runs next to my apartment complex was closed at my nearest cross street.
From my parking lot I could see some assortment of emergency vehicles and scene lights, which nicely highlighted the billowing smoke column.
I have no idea what was producing the smoke. Could have been as simple as downed powerlines, of course, but I've got power.
Most importantly, the 24-hour news station has absolutely nothing about this, not in the regular news, or in the traffic reports.
jester, can I suggest just saying something along the lines of "look, let me stop you there. Thanks for the offer, but I am not interested, stop wasting your time on me and call someone who might give you an order. "
BigV, that sucks. Glad nobody was seriously hurt.
My last grandparent dies yesterday. Paternal Grandma. Renal failure turns out to be a decent way to go. Hospice was involved and said she was in no pain. My mom was there when she passed. She had been breathing really shallowly, took three deeper breaths, then was gone.
Her husband died in 1970, she never remarried. She moved in with us in the early 80's to babysit when my brother and I were kids, as my dad got laid off fron John Deere and both parents had to go to work. Lived with us for about 12 years, then moved into an assisted living apartment complex just a few blocks down the road.
Things I'll remember about her: playing Kings in the Corner at the kitchen table; the distinct sound of her electric typwriter keystrokes as she wrote her many letters, her diamond heart necklace she wore (which she left to me, I just found out), the sound of metal knitting needles clicking as she worked on sweaters, blankets, hats and booties, her cornflake and red hot candy wreaths at Christmas. I'm sure I'll think of lots more.
I am sad, as this is my last grandparent and frankly I'm feeling very small in the big big world right now, but happy that she went so fast and it was not a traumatic passing.
Oh, and to add insult to injury, I just got my period about an hour ago.
:headshake
I'm sorry to hear that, Labrat. :(
My condolences, LR. I hope you feel better soon.
I feel for you LR - I too lost my last grandparent a few months ago. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
Much love your way and all who loved her LabRat.
I have been wanting to carve for over a month. I can't get anyone to help me unpack my shop.
I have been bedridden for days.
The one project I can do, and have promised a friend that I would do, a wand for a Wiccan friend (I have done quite a few), I can't because I have been too sick to for two weeks. Starting to piss me off.
Want to carve really badly... been a long time and it is about the only damn thing I can do anymore.
My poor baby is sick. :( And I'm v tired.
My great uncle died today. I can't go to the funeral.
My condolences to both LabRat and rk for your losses.
I hope rest and health will soon come to you and your child, Aliantha.
So very sorry for the loss in Labrat's & Rkz's family
My great uncle died today. I can't go to the funeral.
Man, I'm sorry.
In February, my grandmother died, and I couldn't go to her funeral because I had pneumonia. Not anywhere near the same as your situation, I know, but still...
We're getting set for our biggest road trip ever to the grand canyon, and I have a stinking cold. 100degrees and I'm sniffling away and I'm so rearely ill it really pisses me off when it does happen.
What's worse is that I'm bound to have given it to the whole family, so the journey there will be me chauffering a car full off sniffly coughing sleeping whiners who won't entertain me.
Ooooooooooooooooooooooooh
Not really upset by this...just annoyed: April and I have to go to this "Marriage Encounter" weekend next weekend. The following week, we have to go to a natural family planning seminar...stupid shit that has to be done so that we can get married in a Catholic church.
Good thing that she's my soulmate, because I don't go through this kind of shit for just anyone. :)
I finally found out who has been sabotaging my stuff. It is a guy that I thought was one of the good guys. I am heart broken, and it all stems from his belief that I have things to easy. I can not confront him about this because I would go to jail for beating him up, even I can take out a drunk. It all started when I got my last upgrade, and I bought my big black Ram. He wanted to teach me about life I am 10 years older than him, and I have experienced pain, homelessness, 27 surgery's, and a host of other indignities. I hope he is happy that he was able to run me off so easily.
The transmission in my truck is toast, and will cost me $1100.00 to replace it. It is going away next week to the recyclers.
In the last 8 months I have lost $10,000.00 to this kids bullshit, I just can't take it any more.
Oh shit, fargon. Is there no way you can prove it, and get the money back off him?
Oh shit, fargon. Is there no way you can prove it, and get the money back off him?
The evidence is purely circumstantial, I have nothing I can go to court with.
I've been hurt - that's cool - I can hide it - that's one thing I'm good at.
Good thing that she's my soulmate, because I don't go through this kind of shit for just anyone. :)
We actually had a good experience with all that stuff. You know what the Church's line will be, but a lot of it is making sure you and the Mrs. can be on the same page as each other.
I don't know. Something is bothering me today. I can't concentrate. I guess I'm just feeling out of sorts, lonely, out of place, silly. It'll pass.
I've been hurt - that's cool - I can hide it - that's one thing I'm good at.
What happened, jester? You do know you don't have to hide anything here. I don't want to be nosy, I'm just concerned.
I don't know. Something is bothering me today. I can't concentrate. I guess I'm just feeling out of sorts, lonely, out of place, silly. It'll pass.
You know we're here to do what we can about the lonely part, and you'll never be out of place here, either. As for the rest, Shawnee, I hope it
will pass soon.
I don't know. Something is bothering me today. I can't concentrate. I guess I'm just feeling out of sorts, lonely, out of place, silly. It'll pass.
I feel that way sometimes. I think it was Monday that that happened to me. Here's a random joke that is only meant to cheer you up and not piss anyone off: (I love vets)
Heard this one?
How many vietnam vets does it take to screw in a light bulb?..................................................................
:mad2:
YOU DON'T KNOW
YOU WEREN'T THERE!!!!!:mad2:
:D
And remember: what doesn't kill you makes you stranger.
Thanks both of you! :)
That is a great joke. My Vietnam Vet buddy will enjoy it!
I just noticed it was stranger and not stronger. :lol:
We actually had a good experience with all that stuff. You know what the Church's line will be, but a lot of it is making sure you and the Mrs. can be on the same page as each other.
Oh I know...and I can appreciate it. It just seems a bit much.
My eczema has flared up again and I am climbing the walls trying not to tear myself to pieces. It'll pass.
How many Communists does it take to change a lightbulb?.................
Can't change the lightbulb, comrade, you have to smash it.
How many bassists does it take to change a lightbulb?
Three - one to change it and two to keep the guitarist from stealing the show.
My eczema has flared up again and I am climbing the walls trying not to tear myself to pieces. It'll pass.
Elecon or
Elidel should help with that (IMO, Elecon's better).
Comment: I put one dab of Elocon on my eczema 3 months ago...hasn't bothered me since.
I have made a new friend and he is going through something terrible depressing, a mortal wound in many ways. The similarities between us are astounding, yet amazing too. We are thousands of miles apart and I cannot tell him it will be ok although it will, he needs me and I cannot be there in person for him - I want to reach through the phone and give him a hug, the human connection he needs so badly, yet again I cannot. I feel so very sad for him. I know his pain, I lived his pain, I wish I could do more - to take it away the pain the anquish and the ugliness of it all - yet I cannot. ;(
Elecon or Elidel should help with that (IMO, Elecon's better).
I use clobetosol propitionate at the moment. It seems to help. My trouble is, I try to avoid using the stuff that helps, because I don't like it. I can often fight off a flare before it really sets in and avoid using the creams and potions and pills. Trouble is sometimes I can't, and I leave it too long before doing so, and then the flareup goes very bad, very quick and takes longer to shift......allowing myself to live a very unhealthy lifestyle for extended periods of time prolly doesn't help much either ...
Anyway, nuff of that :P The Hydroxozine's kicked in and i'm not quite so...edgy now :)
Is the eczema on your hands, Dana? Mine's bad right now too, I have found that wetting the hands, putting the Clobetasol on then putting latex-free gloves on at night is really speeding up the process. hate the gloves, though -need a medicinal beer or two to help me ignore them and fall asleep ;)
*chuckles* the medicinal beer certainly assists:P It is on my hands yes, but it's also pretty much everywhere else. I probably should wear the gloves. And definately drink a beer.
I hate the gloves, but a couple of weeks ago I reached a point of such misery it was gloves or amputation. And this time it really worked. As a kid, I used to tear the gloves off as soon as I fell asleep, no matter how hard I tried. As an adult, I get to use a little "staying asleep assistance" and they usually stay on until the early hours. Once I got the hands under control, the rest didn't seem so bad. Good luck with it.
Whoa, sounds like both your conditions are chronic. Ya'll need to get to a doctor, IMO.
Mine's only on my arm at the bend, but when it flares, it's almost unbearable.
Didn't sleep well last night. Tossed and turned and cried. I've never felt more alone in all my life. I'm just going through the motions, it seems. I'm glad I come here. Besides the laughs, I get to realize that not every other person on the planet is happy and well adjusted. I mean that in a good way, of course.
Oh, and on the subject of skin things. I get bouts of angioedema. A slight irritation to my skin and it swells and itches like crazy. It's like hives only affects deeper. Must have had some irritation to my left forefinger at some point last evening, could have just bumped it on a table, but while I was not sleeping it was itching and swelling and now it's bothering the crap out of me. Antihistimines help some, but make me sleepy so I don't take them when I have to work.
Maybe I'm just destined to be a fool, a freak? Could that be possible? What Would Gannett Do? ;)
I can't open up and I can't share. I'm always holding back, and it hurts all of the people I care about: my girlfriend, my parents, my brother, etc. I don't know what to do about it besides trying to open up.
Have you told them that you have this difficulty? That's probably a good step. I don't mean get people together on the couch for a big announcement...but at some point when they are trying to get you to open up, tell them you can't.
I have always (since my teens) held back. That 'emotional honesty' that some people seem to find so damn easy with those whom they're closest to, has always somewhat mystified me. Don't get me wrong, I tell them things, I tell them how I feel about stuff... but that isn't necessarily the same thing :P
I can't open up and I can't share.
Why?
Because if he told them, he'd have to kill them.
Have you told them that you have this difficulty? That's probably a good step. I don't mean get people together on the couch for a big announcement...but at some point when they are trying to get you to open up, tell them you can't.
I have always (since my teens) held back. That 'emotional honesty' that some people seem to find so damn easy with those whom they're closest to, has always somewhat mystified me. Don't get me wrong, I tell them things, I tell them how I feel about stuff... but that isn't necessarily the same thing :P
I have discussed it with everyone that it matters to. I've been doing my best to just say whatever is on my mind as long as it's appropriate for the audience, and not outright mean and hurtful. This is sort of a long standing issue and it's an issue that most of the other men in my family have had to deal with. The thing is none of them really ever figure out how they conquer it, if they ever do.
Yes, I'm very much not "emotionally honest."
My girlfriend has basically pulled me out of hiding to a large extent, but there's still a long way to go and she's getting tired of being patient. It's not an imminent break-up situation, but I really want to work on this and sort it out.
Why?
I'm afraid the person I am isn't good for anyone, I'm afraid of being rejected and judged. I can be fairly harsh and abrasive sometimes. The thing is this suppressing myself is what ends up casting me out.
Because if he told them, he'd have to kill them.
Who says I haven't? :P
There's more to the story than I'm willing to relate here. I didn't really post here to find a solution (though any tips would be welcome). I posted to just get it out.
I just realized that I am a wimpy assed loser. Rather than call the police I am going to do nothing and save up for a master cylinder for my car. And just let it go, I just don't want any more trouble.
Fargon, that doesn't make you a loser. You are a courageous individual who had the sense and guts to seek help when you felt that was what you had to do, despite how scary that must have been. It is not your fault that the system isn't set up to offer help to someone in your state of mind. It does not make you a loser that you don't actually want to invite a police/arrest/possible court order or criminal record situation into your life.
Is there any outpatient help available to you?
I just realized that I am a wimpy assed loser. Rather than call the police I am going to do nothing and save up for a master cylinder for my car. And just let it go, I just don't want any more trouble.
Sounds like me just trying to go along to get along with the edu-crats. I probably should go to a lawyer for damages but I just want to teach.
Shouldn't have to fight so hard just to live your life.
What happened with the edu-crats Griff? I must ha'missed that.
I've apparently wasted a year+ of my life following the directions of my certification officer at school. In that year I spent most of my time driving or in classes telling myself it'll all be worth it because I'll have my certification in hand. Now I've been put on a new path to certification and have no idea how it'll turn out.
Oh that sucks, Griff. I hate when the goalposts get shifted on you like that :(
I get to see my Psychiatrist on the 17th of this month, and a new Counselor on the 31st. It has been decided that I am not a threat because I was not trained for "combat". I guess I should have joined the Army.
My 21 year old brother(who still lives at home with my mother) is addicted to prescription drugs has now entered his next "phase" of his addiction. He now is stealing money from my mom and two younger sisters!
He is at the point where he can not afford his habbit.
It is like a am watching a live version of
Intervention.
It is making me sick ;-( and there is almost nothing I can do to fix his problem.
Me being the oldest sibling, I have always tried to "fix" everything. I feel like my hands are bound.
On a side note.....This is the 1st time in my short 25year existence that I heard my mother cry. .
My 21 year old brother(who still lives at home with my mother) is addicted to prescription drugs has now entered his next "phase" of his addiction. He now is stealing money from my mom and two younger sisters!
He is at the point where he can not afford his habbit.
It is like a am watching a live version of Intervention.
It is making me sick ;-( and there is almost nothing I can do to fix his problem.
Me being the oldest sibling, I have always tried to "fix" everything. I feel like my hands are bound.
On a side note.....This is the 1st time in my short 25year existence that I heard my mother cry. .
I have seen that situation go from bad to worse. He does need intervention and help at an inpatient facility. Good luck
Woody, that's a horrible situation to be in. I have very little practical advice to offer, but I would perhaps suggest you do a little research into the subject of addiction, seek medical advice on what you as a sibling can/should do to try and support your brother. Do not, however, make yourself responsible for his decisions. You cannot 'fix' this. Nobody can, all you can do is offer support and love, whilst protecting yourself as best you can from the emotional fall out.
Good luck m'dear.
The answer is one that your mother will not like and will not follow through on.
Kick his ass out of the house and have him arrested for the thefts.
He loves the drugs more than he does your family.
The answer is one that your mother will not like and will not follow through on.
Kick his ass out of the house and have him arrested for the thefts.
He loves the drugs more than he does your family.
I couldn't bring myself to say it, but I'll agree with it wholeheartedly! Send him packing - period. Tough love!
Wolf, you about summed it up. I know it will take tough love. But I think she is becoming a glutton for punishment. When I talked to her last night, she sounded emotionally drained and was talking as though he learned his 'lesson'. Which I know he has not!
But I guess when your standing in shit, you can't smell it.
I am in the process of emotionally breaking away. I can def. see this type of situation affecting my family; i.e. my wife and kids, and I don't want that to happen. I just need to wash my hands of this situation and come to the realization that my mother is an enabler and I cant controll it.
But it is hard to detach myself, but he is no longer the 'brother' I grew up with
Thanks for listening to me vent!
I can def. see this type of situation affecting my family; i.e. my wife and kids, and I don't want that to happen. I just need to wash my hands of this situation and come to the realization that my mother is an enabler and I cant controll it.
That is the way to do it. Control what you can control.
It's looking like minifob#2 is going to be as difficult to get going as minifob#1 was... :mecry:
It is a conspiracy.
I know, as a mother, you have eyes in the back of your head. But you need ears in your ankles to hear them whispering their plots to one another. That's why it's a good idea to get down to their level as much as possible.
And remember, never raise your hand against a child. It leaves your groin unprotected.
The heart has its reasons that reason knows nothing of. -- Blaise Pascal
I'm afraid the person I am isn't good for anyone, I'm afraid of being rejected and judged. I can be fairly harsh and abrasive sometimes. The thing is this suppressing myself is what ends up casting me out.
Everyone's different, obviously, but I went through times like this occasionally...and still do. What I've found is that if you're happy with yourself, the rest follows. If you're not happy with yourself, fix it within reason. If it can't all be fixed at once, be patient and take the small victories when you can.
Today: Verifying FAFSAs
Don't people keep copies of tax stuff? In most cases shouldn't W2s match the freaking first line of the tax form?
Isn't it possible that, when filling out the FAFSA, if it says "if you filed a
1040A take the number from line 36" that you should take the number from line 36? Not decide they must mean line 35?
Does it make sense to guess at "child support received" on both the FAFSA and the verification worksheet and guess two totally different numbers?
These are rhetorical questions. I know the answers. I know mistakes get made. But the sheer number of corrections I have to make is amazing. I've been doing this for over five years and I still find myself mumbling: where in the FUCK did they get that number? It all results in more work on our end, (as we are required by fed regs to resolve ALL conflicting information,) more work on the student's end (who now has to go to the appropriate agencies and get documentation,) and more time for them to find out their final eligibility (which is usually blamed on us,) so no one wins.
But, I'm a bit OCD and am always really careful when filling things out. Like, I wouldn't leave "are you male" blank, prompting a selective service mismatch. I would double check my SSN so as not to get a SSA mismatch...on and on.
Done venting! ;)
FAFSA filler-outer here.
those things are a bitch. Having all the data on hand before starting is impossible. so you start anyway, get partway through, then ahve to stop and go look for the docs with the answer. sometimes, the search is not successful for a while. dinnertime comes and goes. the weekend comes and goes. Involving the children/students in their own paperwork is another challenge.
bottom line: they're complicated, necessary, difficult, important, and rare. That's a deadly combination.
True to all. That's why we have numerous sessions (and every friday for two hours) to help people fill them out. Guess how many people show up?
Of course, I've seen millions of them, but really , if you take your time they're fairly self-explanatory. Some families have very unique situations which are confusing, but the most of it is demographics (name, address, etc) and tax forms (with line numbers given.) The ABC worksheet worries most people, but I always tell them not to sweat it too much. If you've never heard of it (like black lung benefits) you probably don't have it. For the other ABC items that don't have line item guidance (child support paid or received, Social Security benefits) if you do the worksheet ahead of time you know you need a number there and you get it THEN go online with all the info right in front of you.
But I do understand the hectic family thing. Still, if you know it's important and that you are supposed to report correctly (just as you are expected to do for the IRS) you don't do it until you have the answers. Also, remember in the future that 1/3 of all apps are selected by the Dept for verification. You'll have a much easier time if you know you filled it out right the first time.
We are willing to help any student from any school with this. Most FA administrators I know across the country will, as well. Also, the hotline is always there.
:) THanks for the filler-outer perspective. It gave me a chance to maybe help educate on the process.
The new door that my step-father put up. I started to let my dogs in for a while, so I go to unlock the door. I unlock the deadbolt...easy. I try to turn the knob, but it won't budge. WTF? I think "There must be two locks." cuz there's a littlle twist thingie on the knob, so I try to turn it, but my Cerebral Palsybic hands can't even grab the thing. :angry:
I'm gonna have to get my folks to show me how to deal with those locks B4 Friday.
Also, IMHO, Copiah County Human Resources handicap bus service should ask people they hire if they have a problem with dogs (I'd rather not have to explain my situation this one).
Guess how many people show up?
guess why I didn't show up?
School is 3000 miles away.
I hate that thing. My wife hates that thing. It's misleading. The first time we filled on out, we got a string of numbers at the bottom, I thought it was an account code. Nope, it was our "expected family contribution". I almost passed out! Yah, rite. We can swing that. If we stop paying rent and eating. It was ludicrous.
s123, you have a talent, like freakin Rainman, to cope with those forms on a regular basis. You may not even be human, I don't know. But I have personally had my ass kicked by them. I'm not railing at you, never. but the form, it really sucks..It's really hard, the stakes are high, emotions are high, money is low, just a fucking hassle, class A hassle.
Thaanks for letting me (and by extension, my wife) vent.
The new door that my step-father put up. I started to let my dogs in for a while, so I go to unlock the door. I unlock the deadbolt...easy. I try to turn the knob, but it won't budge. WTF? I think "There must be two locks." cuz there's a littlle twist thingie on the knob, so I try to turn it, but my Cerebral Palsybic hands can't even grab the thing. :angry:
Drax,
get these.
They are great, really, I got some for my Mom and she loves them. She can even turn it with her elbow if her hands are full.
I kept one for my bedroom closet door too because it was a small knob and always hard to turn.
Just soften it a little in warm water and slip it over the knob. That's it... no shit... that easy... they don't slip.
Awesome xoxoxoBruce!
Thank you! My mom will love them too! Thank you.
It's looking like minifob#2 is going to be as difficult to get going as minifob#1 was... :mecry:
But it'll sure be fun trying...
I should be happy, because I had a job interview today. I was a little nervous and excited beforehand, of course, and had spent a lot of time making sure I was prepared--portfolio updated, forms filled out, what to wear, etc. etc.
I got to the place, met the guy, started the interview, and realized part-way through that my interviewer was extremely hungover.
He even almost fell asleep a few times.
I'm not entirely sure he was aware of half the things we talked about.
sigh.
Clod - Vitex Agnus!!!!! Get it into to you.
guess why I didn't show up?
School is 3000 miles away.
I hate that thing. My wife hates that thing. It's misleading. The first time we filled on out, we got a string of numbers at the bottom, I thought it was an account code. Nope, it was our "expected family contribution". I almost passed out! Yah, rite. We can swing that. If we stop paying rent and eating. It was ludicrous.
s123, you have a talent, like freakin Rainman, to cope with those forms on a regular basis. You may not even be human, I don't know. But I have personally had my ass kicked by them. I'm not railing at you, never. but the form, it really sucks..It's really hard, the stakes are high, emotions are high, money is low, just a fucking hassle, class A hassle.
Thaanks for letting me (and by extension, my wife) vent.
I never said the methodology was fair. Try being one of our students who is single, no dependents, and makes 15 grand a year and gets no help. They get screwed worse than anyone.
I was trying to help. I
am human. I administer a program that I don't always agree with, but am bound by law to uphold the integrity of. I get my ass kicked on a daily basis by people like you who don't like it. But we try to help. Your school was 3000 miles away? Did I not say FA administrators all over the country hold help sessions, and meet with students regardless of school? It is a public service; and we try so very hard.
Let me ask you this: when you are determining eligibility for
federally funded (read: taxpayers, OUR, money) programs (including relatively low interest student loans) why are you miffed that you might have to do some work to get it? Has everything been handed to you on a silver platter? Also, I find that students who find doing the forms tedious and unfair to be the students who don't excel because they don't like to do the work. I'm not saying this is true about you, but you have to see that this process is important to the whole education thing. It is also important because, as I'm sure we all know, there are a lot of system players in the world.
What sort of hoops do you jump through to buy a house, or a car? Certainly an education is just as important and worthy of the effort.
Where specifically were you stumped? Seriously, I'm interested in what part of the form kicked your butt. If it wasn't something that could be explained with a little extra effort or a quick call to the nearest FA office or the help line, I get the opportunity to propose changes to the form every year. Your input could be quite helpful. In the meantime, you can always PM me with questions. I am also bound by law to keep all information private.[/
I can deny it no longer. I am allergic to our guinea pig. As I feared it seems to have gotton worse with no exposure for 10 days while we were on vacation. Last night while playing with her in my lap, I got hives on my arms and legs. [COLOR="Red"]#*<%[/COLOR]. I have never gotten hives before, ever.
Not sure who this is going to be harder on, me or the kid. My husband is jumping for joy. Turd.
I have serious g-string issues today.
Not all they're cracked up to be?
They may be a little too up the crack, to be comfortable :)
I'm now free balling....or whatever we decided it was called.
I'm now free balling....or whatever we decided it was called.
You've joined the Labia Liberation Front.
I have serious g-string issues today.
Try turning that little knobby thingy.
I can deny it no longer. I am allergic to our guinea pig. As I feared it seems to have gotton worse with no exposure for 10 days while we were on vacation. Last night while playing with her in my lap, I got hives on my arms and legs. [COLOR="Red"]#*<%[/COLOR]. I have never gotten hives before, ever.
Not sure who this is going to be harder on, me or the kid. My husband is jumping for joy. Turd.
are you sure it's the pig? what are you using for bedding material?
That's a good point. I had a similar thing with guinea pigs when i was a kid, and again with rabbits. Was ages before we figured out it was the bedding not the critters. Can't recall what bedding it was. I think it utilised hay/straw of some sort.
*gasp* see her shaving?
we can only hope...
*snort*
A co-worker mentioned the bedding possibly being the culprit. Cedar and pine aren't supposed to be good for small animals...the aromatic oils or something naturally in the wood is supposed to be bad for them. I accidently bought pine this last time, but now it's used up, so with the next cage change (and a good cleaning) we'll see if going back to the original stuff I bought helps any. Just in case, you'se guys who gamble in stocks might want to see who makes Benadryl...
you'se guys who gamble in stocks...
the recent volatility is enough to give me hives...:thepain:
you'se guys who gamble in stocks...
As opposed to
those guys, who gambol in socks...
'scuse me... can you toss that pair of dice for me?
not enough sleep last night (because I stayed up too late reading) so I feel crappy this afternoon. :(
*sighs* I am low today. I went out with my friend for a drink after a meeting last night (the friend I've mentioned before, the one I am head over heels in love with :P). I haven't said anything to hm about the way I feel, because I am not sure where he's at on the whole getting involved thing. So I did a little digging in my conversation with him.
Ha. I know where he's at, I spent the last 5 years happily detemined to remain uninvolved. Of course, that's before I spent several months working closely with a friend of 3 years, and then unexpectedly fell in love. He's still in that place, y'know. He's had a girlfriend since his divorce, but he ended it after a year, because she 'wanted to be number one in his life' and that place is occupied by his son. Since then he's been studiously avoiding getting involved.
I knew some of this already.
Thing is, there may come a time, when someone will flick that switch with him, and he'll want to get involved...like he flicked that switch with me...but, clearly, it hasn't happened yet, therefore it isn't me that'll change his mind on this.
So, I am trying to get my head around it and just try to stop seeing him in that way, just try and continue being his good friend, cause having him as a friend, well it isn't nothing y'know?
I am just a little devastated though, by the realisation that it ain't ever goin to be. I don't fall in love easy or often...I've never felt so drawn to a person, my entire life. I'll get over it. But it sucks.
You don't know you won't be the one to flip his switch. Sometimes people absolutely don't want to be involved, BUT, they wake one day to a flipped switch.
You're a great person. Just keep being his friend, enjoy that, and who knows what could happen?
Just keep being his friend, enjoy that, and who knows what could happen?
Good advice. That's kind of where I'm at...but I have to very forcibly let go of that as a possibility (for now), because right now it's driving me crazy.
Oh..and I want a cigarette. I really, really want a fucking cigarette. I was doing okay on the not smoking thing, I even stopped using the nicotine gum after the second week, but today I've wound myself up and now I really, really want a cig.
Oh..and I want a cigarette. I really, really want a fucking cigarette. I was doing okay on the not smoking thing, I even stopped using the nicotine gum after the second week, but today I've wound myself up and now I really, really want a cig.
Hey, Dana, it's nice being almost in your time zone. I'm on vacation this week and must have missed that you were quitting smoking. I hope you can hold on, resist the temptation, and overcome your addiction.
Good luck.
Actually, I think that's the first I've mentioned it. Which is unusual for me. Usually when I stop smoking, its all I can talk about for the first few days at least :P
Look, you've got the oral fixation for the smokes and a perfectly decent guy on the next bar stool. Maybe flint should draw a picture... just saying...
Could he make the picture look like my friend? :P
My hair won't stay out of my face today and it's driving me freaking bonkers.
Today I am happy, sad, happy, sad, happy, sad. I am so frustrated and yet hope-filled. Thrilled and scared. Rollercoaster madness. Argh...can someone give me advice without knowing what the hell is wrong? Just....blah!:apickle:
I wrecked one of my mag wheels. WAAAAHHHHH
Some dumbfuck driving a Ftruck tried to pull out into traffic in front of me and I had no where to go but into the concrete tram island.
Yah, boo sucks to fucking Summer. There....that clear enough? Mum (who lives half way down the hill from me)* went on holiday yesterday morning for a week...two of my best friends (my ex and a mutual friend who is now his new girlfriend) went to Prague this morning for five days. My friend, from earlier in this thread, has gone to ground (I think he's probably in Tyneside). I've also been trying to get hold of another friend and comrade for past two days, just found out this aft she's in fucking Nice.
Y'know, I can go days without seeing people and that's fine...but knowing that hardly any of the people I might normally phone (or be phoned by) for a chat, or call in for a coffee, are around, all of a sudden all I want is fucking company. Go figure.
Hate this. Been fighting off this 'left behind' feeling all fricken day. I knew it was comin actually, because mum and the two J's I knew were going away. Bollox. I do quite well by myself unless I know I don't have a choice but to be by myself at which point I am rubbish at it. Probably doesn't help that I'm already borderline depressed to start with (seriously limits the people I'd voluntarily interract with at the best of times). Been doin the whole manic to on the floor, and back to manic again roller coaster all frikken week. And wouldn'y y'just know this weekend would be a slow one in the Cellar.....why? Because everyone's out enjoying the Summer.**
Thank God for Sundae Girl, that's what I say, an hour long phone conversation helped ground me. I don't mean an hour of me saying how pissed off i am : An hour of just normal chit chat.
[COLOR="DarkOliveGreen"]* I live at the top of the hill, in the center of the village; halfway down the hill lives my mum; at the bottom of the hill live my brother and his family, and my friend/ex. Seriously, it's like at some point my living arrangements took on a nursery rhyme aspect.[/COLOR]
[COLOR="Olive"]**Yes I know... I live in a beautiful part of the country and have a dog and therefore ample reason to be out enjoying the Summer, and indeed I have done precisely that for portions of the day, but right now I'm wallowing in self-pity, so bleh.[/COLOR]
DanaC - I think you should use this opportunity to write a good poem or short story for the Creative Expression forum.
I could do that....or I could get slowly more drunk and eat whatever snack food there is in the house...I do believe there may be a meat and potato pie in the fridge (pre-bought).
We had about 4 close calls cycling through Bath, NY on Saturday. If you can't see, don't know the rules of the road, or don't have any idea how much space you take up stop driving! Oh and if there happens to be a bike lane adjacent to a steady stream of cars don't creep along without any signals staring fixedly at prefab homes completely unaware of what is happening around you...
I'm better now.
Staff meeting in 10 min. Why do i have a feeling something will go down? Then again, why do I care? The world is my oyster!
Nothing...nothing is upsetting me today...very strange.
Some dumbass emailed a pipebomb threat into the university today. WTF. A mass email went out a little while ago warning to look out for anything suspicious.
Master 2yr old has croup and a roaring fever....hes really very ill.
He has been on me or carried by me since 11pm last nite, finally he has crashed in his bed and I am about to fall in a heap.
Master 4yr old is watching Narnia and been pleaded with be good for an hour.
I hope you were able to get some rest, DNs.
First day of school today.
Urgh.
All my art of the past 2 months has to be recreated because no one listened 3 months ago. (work)
Makes me pissy.
The baby's got diarrhea, and a really vicious diaper rash to go with it. I would let him go commando to help the diaper rash, but then we'd have projectile poop on everything...
A thick layer of
or
always helped when my kids had a nasty rash. Poor little guy...
What is that second picture?
Calendula ointment, Boiron
Is it a viral or fungal rash Clod?
I swear by Daktarin Cream over here...the equivalent over there would have miconazole nitrate in it.
You will notice a big difference after one use of it.
It's not a yeast infection, I know that. It's definitely connected to whatever's causing the diarrhea, though he has no fever. I'm using Desitin on it (main ingredient zinc oxide,) but the problem right now is he's pooping liquid every 15 minutes, so I can barely keep up with the cleaning and re-applying. I've been pretty satisfied with Desitin in the past, but it needs at least a little time to work...
We used
Balmex when the lil' ones needed something that really stayed on. Desitin was our normal day to day cream.
use the lansinoh. its like wax.
I gave you the wrong product, but I don't remember the name of the pink stuff we used... it really didn't come off. prolly try Jims.
The pink stuff. Wasn't Drapolene was it?
That doesn't ring a bell... maybe a week on the beach will sharpen my mind.
Spent a long time setting up and making a video, hurt a lot, wanted to do it outside.
Used my old lapel mike (never had a problem with it)... fucker was broken.
Filming outside? You must be feeling a little better then *smiles* good to hear it.
I have a little porch outside my office that my chair goes to and had some help, but you are right. I am.
I needed some outside air after the last week + of being inside.
Of course you did. Being stuck indoors indefinately is a real drag. I'm glad you got a bit of air ;)
Clodfobble: how is your little boy today? My suggestion for devil diaper rash is soap and water, and air--assuming that the projectile diarhea has resolved itself.
And, um . . . you named your children "Master?" :D
Shawnee: Paranoia Strikes Deep!
Meh. The diarrhea is still around. But still no fever, so the doctor's office just says keep him hydrated. The diaper rash is considerably better in the mornings, but by evening it's usually back in force.
I'm in the crash-mode I enter after spending an entire week with my girlfriend. I really wish I could find a way to get around this funk. It never fails to occur though: Spend a lot of time with Her Lovely Self, end up wallowing in a funk for a day or two when we have to spend a few days apart.
Bed bound for a few days.
I went to wal mart this morning, and if that ain't bad enough the cash register locked up. The lady in front of me was only buying tic-tacs and we had to spent 20 minutes debating weather or not to open another register.
Why is that the people who scream customer service the loudest, do the worst job of it? Also why do I have to make allowances for these people?
Classes started today. Blech. Traffic is going to be a bear for a couple weeks.
I called the Dr's office today to make an appointment for a checkup. Got #8 this morning.
On the upside I did get a line on some cranberry extract capsules to help with the more frequent UTIs due to procreation practice. And I should be able to ride any and all rides I want to in Disney next month.
My vacation...just two friggin days off...Thur and Fri of this week...the first and only vacation I have planned this year...is very likely going to be cancelled. Not because of anything I did or didn't do, but because my co-workers cannot get their shit together.
We have a major preliminary budget due on Friday, the 31st, and I have to input the data to the forecasting software prior to then. Not one person has returned their data to me for input or even responded to my reminder emails, other than the VP, who stated that we WILL meet this deadline. :mad2: :mad:
Stormie
I spilled a little beer on my keyboard the other night, and now it stops working if it lays flat. I have it propped up on one end with a bottle of Elmer's; so far so good (fingers crossed/knock on wood/rub my Teddyscare's belly).
I had hoped it was just single instance of a fashion faux pas, a fashion risk gone horribly awry, if you will. But no, I have now seen 2 coworkers with asymmetrical hairdos. These women are in their 40s, my age range. I have not seen any of the young fashionistas sporting this reprehensible hairstyle that I hated when it was all hip and cool in the 80s when it came around. These are women who tend to be all fashiony, too. Would it be wrong to tell them I think it looks teh ghey, or should I just walk up with scissors and clip the offending strands off one side of their lop-sided little heads? [/OCD needs symmetry rant]
Oh, and just learned one of my fave admissions counselors accepted a position at another school. Happy for her, sad for us.
I think you should take secret photos so we can all join the mockfest!
should I just walk up with scissors and clip the offending strands off one side of their lop-sided little heads?
YES.
But, the mock-fest first!
:lol: This could get bigger than Mullet Mocking!
I'm almost out of my favorite tea. Please see the food forum.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
K, so I snuck up on the HairBear twins, and tried to snip, but their heads snapped the other way so quickly (presumably due to the weight of the longer hair on that side) that I missed completely and they asked me what the hell I was doing. I sneaked away (think sneaky Warner Bros cartoon Bugs) and pretended like I hadn't even been there. I dont' think they bought it.
hmmm... maybe this subset of humanity is more cunning than mullet boys?
I couldn't decide if this belongs here or in the
Boys and their toys thread.
Camaro Mullet.That's not a Mullet. He looks like a musician to me.
Bruce, I agree. I mostly like the text. There are better pictures elsewhere on that site.
Yeah, that one's definitely missing the 'business in the front' part.
The hair isn't half as bad as the jeans.
Classes started today. Blech. Traffic is going to be a bear for a couple weeks.
I called the Dr's office today to make an appointment for a checkup. Got #8 this morning.
On the upside I did get a line on some cranberry extract capsules to help with the more frequent UTIs due to procreation practice. And I should be able to ride any and all rides I want to in Disney next month.
What a drag getting UTI's from procreation practice in the first place. Bet you wouldn't be so keen on going to Disneyland if *those* rides worked the same way the one does at home. Or maybe you would. Hmmm....
So, I'm cruising along, letting my inner mullett run free, perusing
mullett websites... when what do I find? Could it really be?
Just for you S123
[ATTACH]14272[/ATTACH]
Awesome! It's a whole famn mullett damily!
I'm scared of my inner "Karaoki Mullet". Well I'm not sure I have one........but it would be just like me to end up with one after all the shit-talking. So I'm trying to be quiet right now....very [COLOR="White"]quiet.[/COLOR]
Love me some "Joe Dirts":p
gonna have to get a needle biopsy of my left tit. Not really looking forward to that.
Fluoro, CT, or US-guided Bx?
Never had a mullet (or short-long as we sometimes call them here)...thank God. My hair has essentially been 2 or 3 styles for the past 14 years.
Fluoro, CT, or US-guided Bx?
US guided. I saw the mammo--doesn't look good from that standpoint (the mass has "legs"; not nice and smooth-edged) and the US today showed a signal in the mass.
Mammo is such a vague study, and US to a lesser degree (depending more on the tech); that's why they go in.
At any rate, at least you're not living 100 years ago; where one day you'd just wake up dead.
yeah. Deadness is just so...still.
Bottom line: they don't know what it is yet. They're troubleshooting, but they haven't even determined if there is a problem.
gonna have to get a needle biopsy of my left tit. Not really looking forward to that.
Shit. Good luck Bri.
Hey Bri...keep us posted, ok? Thinking about you!
Good luck Bri. Let us know how you get on.
Good luck Bri. Let us know how you get on.
ditto
1 -- jeeze, Brianna, good luck. It really does exist, the good luck that is, having recently experienced some of this very flavor.
2 -- in a much less ominous but still very upsetting vein, *this* pisses me off.
Care to guess what this previously encircled?
Care to guess what this previously encircled?
A 1972 Husqvarna motorcycle?
a monster?
(and thanks, all, for the good vibes)
Never had a mullet (or short-long as we sometimes call them here)...thank God. My hair has essentially been 2 or 3 styles for the past 14 years.
bald, balder and cueball? :D
a monster?
(and thanks, all, for the good vibes)
hahaha free at last.....
(hope it went OK, Bri....)
Care to guess what this previously encircled?
Cock?
S123 wins.
SonofV's bicycle.
Now, no wheels. Walking to school, walking everywhere. Goddammit. Right out of the yard. I'm pissed. And they had to freakin carry it away, because I noticed this weekend the tire was flat. Why steal a kid's bicycle? Hmm?
A 1972 Husqvarna motorcycle?
Nope, do have a 1973 Honda CR350 though.
Nope, do have a 1973 Honda CR350 though.
Is that the cafe racer?
Is this it?
Neg fu.
Enduro model. Knobby tires, high fenders and exhaust, *plus* turn signals.
Neg fu.
Enduro model. Knobby tires, high fenders and exhaust, *plus* turn signals.
Neg fu?
Shit Bri - Good luck luv.
I don't know where I acquired that idiom. It means no.
My wife is going to a weekend festival without me (by my choice) wherein it is likely that she'll have quite the carnal good time. I have a single date on Sunday. For some reason, this seems to juxtapose rather feebly.
Okay, I'm not actually *upset*...more perplexed, I guess.
2 -- in a much less ominous but still very upsetting vein, *this* pisses me off.
Care to guess what this previously encircled?
I was sort of hoping that it was something on the order of ... This cable and lock secured three members of Greenpeace to a giant sequoia shortly before they lost their lives in an industrial chainsawing accident ...
Sorry to hear about SonOfV's ride.
My wife is going to a weekend festival without me (by my choice) wherein it is likely that she'll have quite the carnal good time. I have a single date on Sunday. For some reason, this seems to juxtapose rather feebly.
Okay, I'm not actually *upset*...more perplexed, I guess.
Elspode, your lifestyle, in this regard, is so different from mine, that, if you posted in a completely unfamiliar alphabet, I wouldn't be any more distant from your experience. I wonder how many others might feel the same.
Elspode, your lifestyle, in this regard, is so different from mine, that, if you posted in a completely unfamiliar alphabet, I wouldn't be any more distant from your experience. I wonder how many others might feel the same.
I don't "get" the whole thing, but I do know the morass of feelings about feeling left out, concern about decisions once made, that sort of thing.
Phonies!
Why do people pretend to be who they're not? What do they suppose they're gaining? I mean, to hate yourself SO much that you can't live without an alter ego, can't live without seeing how many people you can fool? Pretty sad. I feel sorry for them.
With my myriad of faults, I am who I am, wherever I am. I guess that means something.
They're everywhere!:tinfoil:
:lol:
gonna have to get a needle biopsy of my left tit. Not really looking forward to that.
Ugh. Perhaps if you got a nipple pierced at the same time, it would be worthwhile?
Damnit. I've moved from the "Happy" thread to this one. Sunday night date cancelled. The wife's out at a giant Pagan lustfest, and my one chance at action has gone bye-bye. Not happy.
I'm upset. My daughter's third grade teacher (she's older now, not at that school anymore) has just been charged with having child porn on his school computer. :mad: Plus having surfed she-male sites on same. He also surfed porn sites on library computers, using his library card. :eyebrow: (Fortunately for his students, this guy is obviously not the sharpest tool in the shed.)
This guy had the images on his monitor at school??!! So what was his mind on while teaching and looking at his students (including my daughter)? Not likely the math lesson. :mad2:
How do we defend our kids against sexual predator teachers? Most of them, at least recently, seem to be women (doesn't make me feel better, since I have three sons), and then there are the guys like this one. Few to none of them seem to have previous criminal backgrounds, so background checks don't pick up their 'proclivities'.
My daughter says she feels weird that she was in the same room with him. I'm weirded out and disgusted by what was likely going through his mind, even if it wasn't specifically about my child.
I don't know that I have a point here. At the moment I'm just pissed off.
Fuck, I am so overwhelmed at the moment. My fiance's business has been going through a big transition, and I've been doing what I can to help, especially as emotional support...but just right now I'm having a tough time keeping it together. Ick.
I'm not upset, but...I'm just incredibly sore. I haven't been working out like I should recently. I started back up yesterday--60 min. of activity each day. Motherfuck, do I hurt! Did I mention that I'm also trying to stay away from OTC pain relievers, because I feel like I've over-medicated on them in the past 5 years? I'm only going to take some ibuprofen if the pain is too much.
Wife now gone on weeklong trip w/beau. Meanwhile, my most torrid correspondent has hit maximum stress level in her life and ceased all extramarital frolic (although she did come over tonight and drink beer, eat ganja cookies, and watch TV - which was surprisingly good, thanks to the cookies - and just hang out.), causing me explore other options. No, not *those* options, I a flaming heterosexual. Anyway, not entirely happy about this.
I do have a date set up for Friday night, though...so things could be worse.
I have a cold and I'm cranky.
----------------------------------------
sorry you didn't get any spodeman. Hope Friday is a gooder.
The lack of companionship is starting to wear on me as it does every once and a while...wish all of my (ex)friends hadn't gone off to college to become drunken backstabbing ho's...
Edit: Also it's one of the nights where I can really feel the distance between boyfriend and I.
aww
It'll turn around again razz.
I know...just gets to me some days.
Thanks though, hope your cold clears up soon. :)
Ohh 'spode, a weeklong trip. I can imagine that is difficult. Getting lucky vibes your way on Friday.
Syc - why are you in pain? I obviously havent been around long enough to know.
Sky - I am on week 4 on the flu here and its driving me spare.
I'm cranky because I am a cranky ole tart these days.
Probably cause you're not getting laid.
If BOB is the name of your vibrator, that is hilarious because that is the name my friend uses for hers!!! (yes, my friend. I don't have a name for mine ;))
I know...just gets to me some days.
Thanks though, hope your cold clears up soon. :)
Thanks. I plan to stop coughing by the end of the week!
Yeah, Razz some days are down days so you gotta have some up days!!
You'll have to get into a new crowd? Club or something?
Sky - I am on week 4 on the flu here and its driving me spare.
I'm cranky because I am a cranky ole tart these days.
man...4 week flu? I am a fricken vitamin and herb guru.
I say take some b-12 complex to cut it short. Alot of people say vit. C but it
just makes me thirsty in a pill form so lots of juice and other fluids is tolerated better.
and yer not cranky...not THAT cranky
Can someone tell me if their husband leaves them to fall asleep on the couch alone after dressing up for him in lingerie? Every time? I woke up crying this morning because of my husband's repeated lack of interest.......waking up on the couch shivering in your lingerie is kind of humiliating. Then he called me mentally ill ("more of my manic shit"- to be exact) when he saw that I was crying.
This should probably go in the relationship thread....but this is upsetting me today. Again.
Am I insane to be that upset over it? Why does he do that every time?
"Nice outfit, goodnight".
Does anyone else here do that to their wife?
There guys....now you have enough ammunition forever.
How can a doctor diagnosis one of the variations of hyperthyroidism?
Initial diagnosis usually simply requires a physical examination for the following:
* Enlarged thyroid gland
* Rapid heart beat (tachycardia) or heart palpitations
* Smooth, velvety skin
* Tremor of the fingertips
* For Graves' disease, eyes and skin as described in Part 1
Other symptoms are:
* Fatigue
* Sweaty palms
* Weight loss
* Fine brittle hair
* Restlessness
* Depression
* Increased appetite
* Changes in sex drive
* Muscle weakness, especially in the upper arms and thighs
* Shortened attention span
* Heat intolerance
* Increased sweating
* Nervousness and irritability
* Restless sleep or insomnia
* Erratic behavior
* For women, irregular menstrual cycle and reduced menstrual flow
* Infertility, recurrent miscarriage
* Increased frequency of bowel movements
Can someone tell me if their husband leaves them to fall asleep on the couch alone after dressing up for him in lingerie? Every time? I woke up crying this morning because of my husband's repeated lack of interest.......waking up on the couch shivering in your lingerie is kind of humiliating. Then he called me mentally ill ("more of my manic shit"- to be exact) when he saw that I was crying.
This should probably go in the relationship thread....but this is upsetting me today. Again.
Am I insane to be that upset over it? Why does he do that every time?
"Nice outfit, goodnight".
Does anyone else here do that to their wife?
There guys....now you have enough ammunition forever.
that's cold-blooded. it should also be under the thread of WTF? sounds like he's one of those that "it's no biggie" whether you have sex or not or anything else for that matter. not insane, you have every right to be pissed.
WHAT a STUPID FUCKER !!!!!!
Or should I say NON-FUCKER !!!
I understand that BigV....but I know for a fact that he is sexually motivated and still you know..... Just umm...not with me.
I knew I would sound like an asshole for having a husband that has something wrong with his neck and I still insist on sexual satisfaction. But if we are really going to talk about this embarassing stuff that I brought up and shouldn't finish the thought on: he does it with himself by his self all the time and does not touch me. Not only that.....he's been pointing out that fact. I'm not sure why in the hell he's doing that either but ok. He is not depressed or have a lack of sexual desire. Which is why I tried to dress up and be overtly attractive for him in the first place...you know over and over again. I thought well- maybe he's doing it by himself all the time because I haven't been saucy. Then like an idiot....I dress up again and get left on the couch. This is just so pathetic. I have to quit doing that.
I wasn't trying to say he has a lack of sexual desire. Because he doesn't.
Jester is actually right on target. He does act like it's not a big deal either way. It's as if he is trying to point out that I am not attractive. But I know I am. Sometimes I feel humiliated and don't feel attractive....but I know I am. He is pulling a head game and using sex to do it. How long can this go on? It's not recent or a symptom of a health issue...he is doing it intentionally. Why would he pick sex as a controlling mechanism? Why does he feel like his wife is a slut for having sex with him? Because you know, this is what he's starting to sound like and act like.
Nice outfit....whatever....slut. Are people higher minded that jack off and refuse and ignore the sexual advances of their wives? Ok I don't get why. I'll admit it. If I knew why he kept doing this the problem would be solved by now. I keep forgetting and then remembering why I should stop doing that after I wake up shivering and crying.
You know.....I can't believe I just broadcasted all that to everyone over the internet....but it's sticking.
My momma never said there would be days like this.
Ditto what Zip said.
If it really does happen often, somethings up. Is his work stressful? Health issues? Is the rest of your relationship working? *shrug* Everybodies different, does a different approach work? Anyway, I'm sorry for your troubles.
I just remembered your husbands deal on the cancer thread. This could just be the wrong time, but health is on the list.
Griff- please read my post #465. I think you accidently skipped it because we posted at the same time....
You know what? Nevermind. No one needs to read/hear this crap...
I just read your other post. I'm way over my head on this. I have no idea where to point you. sorry g
Griff- please read my post #465. I think you accidently skipped it because we posted at the same time....
You know what? Nevermind. No one needs to read/hear this crap...
Cicero, surely you've been around the Cellar long enough to know that we'll listen if you need to vent - at the very least. There's such a wide mix of people here that someone may come up with helpful suggestion.
I wish that someone were me, but I'm afraid not this time. Your posts about your husband's behaviour chilled me to the marrow. It You may be right - perhaps he is using sex and your desire to be desireable to him in a power play game to control you. But if he's ill with cancer, maybe that's the only thing he thinks he can control right now?
Can you sit and talk to him about it? Could you both get to counselling?
Hugs, anyway.
If I knew why he kept doing this the problem would be solved by now.
This is something that you should talk to him about. I don't know what kind of relationship you have with him, and how you deal with things as they come up, but talking is really the best thing you can do right now.
Ask him why he is doing it, and figure out a solution together.
May he just needs a hand !!! ;) ;) ;)
Just kidding , talk will help .
C – If I remember correctly, I believe you stated that he asked you for a Divorce, in the Relationship Thread? Maybe he still wants it.
He could have fetishes, he doesn’t know how to tell you about.
Or he could be gay and doesn’t know how to tell you that either.
Just random thoughts. I hope things do work out for you though.
Cicero that's a horrible thing to have to deal with. No you aren't crazy to be upset by it.
Yea- I started to talk about it with him this morning. How embarassing....of course it's my fault.
He may be feeling confused about his feelings (or ratherhis lack of desire) and is normalising it in his own mind rather than dealing with it. What the reason might be for his lack of desire is a whole other story.
If BOB is the name of your vibrator, that is hilarious because that is the name my friend uses for hers!!! (yes, my friend. I don't have a name for mine ;))
BOB is the universal term for
Battery
Operated
Boyfriend ;)
Cicero - sorry to hear about this. I think you have every right to be upset.
Why is it your fault? what did the conversation reveal?
Ohh 'spode, a weeklong trip. I can imagine that is difficult. Getting lucky vibes your way on Friday.
Well, one blessing about how I live my dating life is that there are possibilities, and then there are *certainties*. Friday is a certainty, as is tomorrow night, which just was cemented today. In fact, I have been holding both of these longtime friends/soon to be lovers at bay due to the carrying on with the other gal these past few months.
I know it doesn't seem like it, but I'm not really a slut. Yeah, its not perfectly great, this out of town for a week with the boyfriend thing. Perhaps when I'm drunker later on tonight I'll get on gabbly and spew my guts about my Sunday night fuckfest experience (preview: it was bad).
Like ohhhh you dirty boy bad? or bad bad?
fuck no...if only. No, I ended up being probably the only person out of 350 or so who did not have sex that night.
I'm soooo coming over to one of them there fuck fests.
Hey that sex party sounds like a good cure! Maybe if my husband saw that other people do it- it would be ok.
Thanks for your contribution everyone....we talked about things last night....it sounds kind of like a misunderstanding by the both of us. Apparently he was waiting for me in bed....and I was waiting for him to come back. This is what it sounds like..........
I asked him point blank: Do you still find me attractive? The answer was decidedly yes.
Well I'm still left hanging here.......he finds me attractive but what about sex or intimacy?
What a pickle. Don't people at least have make-up sex or something?
I'm still not convinced. (if we can use convinced as a action verb)
Well I guess that I am done with the topic now....I have different stuff to worry about- stuff that actually applies to the grand scheme of things. Now I can say- so I don't have sex anymore..... So what?
Back to square one.......
If he finds you attractive but doesn't want to have sex with you then there is clearly a problem. It may be his libido is low, but whatever it is it's worth exploring.
Cic, that's fucked up, I'd be pissed. I hope you can figure out what's up and work thru it.
Makes the "too much dressing on my salad" that I was going to bitch about seem kinda... small.
Makes the "too much dressing on my salad" that I was going to bitch about seem kinda... small.
lol jinx:P
Now hang on, V, I can see how the joke threads are irritating to you, but this thread has actually provided a lot of interesting information about the various posters. It's a place to receive compassion or generally gripe without starting a whole new thread about it, what's so terrible about that?
Edit: Oh. Wait. I'm dumb. You were saying that the "weeds" are what's upsetting you. Moving on, then.
I thought he was saying that salads are weeds, which I would agree with.
I'm soooo coming over to one of them there fuck fests.
Heartland Pagan Festival - May 22-26, 2008. We are considering hiring
Wendy Rule, a fellow Aussie, to be a performer. Maybe you could fly along on her coattails or something...
Dinner failed miserably tonight. It was only barely edible, and because it was being prepared in batches, I just gave up and stopped halfway through.
We had scrambled eggs instead.
It was supposed to be these potato-pancake things (officially called llapingachos, traditionally from Ecuador. I was originally searching for a recipe for latkes, but these looked easier.) I have never successfully made anything that required frying, I don't know why I keep attempting it.
Ohhh, I hear ya.
I cant make corn bread, now, corn bread is not a big thing over here (we dont have corn meal) but I cant get the shit to work without falling to pieces.
With all over frying type things (like your pancakes), I always find at least 24hrs refrigeration helps them stay together during the frying.
I cant say the same about corn bread though.
I was very proud of myself and the salmon patties I made that actually stayed together the other nite.
UGH
So...you see that nice combination of swirly color...those are very small beads....and you see that nice empty container next to it....those are where the beads were sorted by color...you see that empty bag? That's where the beads came from mixed in a multicolor pack...and that needle on top of the empty bead holder which you probably CAN'T see...is what I used to sort them.
Yeah I just finished that pack about two minutes before I knocked over the container...and they're all nearly the same color too :bawling:
Oh fuck
and I am glad your desk is as messy as mine :)
Teehee...my desk is always covered in things because I like having everything at hand instantly...I have a shot of the setup of my desk at college...every drawer pulled out in sucession with lots and lots of things piled all around...with all my beads at hand so I could get to them easily :D..
Edit: Still cleaning up beads, btw.
I accidentally caused someone's computer account to be deleted at work yesterday. He came in to work this morning to find he couldn't login. He's kind of important too.
oops.
To fix it, I had to acknowledge my mistake to an entire department, and put in the request to get it fixed.
All because I clicked a millimeter higher on the screen than I should have. And then didn't catch my mistake when I proofed it later.
Don't feel bad, glatt. At a company I once worked for, the IT guys were migrating the email system, and only thought they had properly replicated everything over before they deleted all the old accounts.
Oh, and then they found out they'd been doing email backups wrong for for three-plus years. There was nothing to restore from.
Over a hundred employees, 100% of their email accounts lost. All emails, all contacts in the addressbooks, everything. But nobody was fired!
Oh, and then they found out they'd been doing email backups wrong for for three-plus years. There was nothing to restore from.
From
Computer Stupidities:
Customer: "What do you mean, other tape? When it said second volume, I just hit enter again."
• Tech Support: "Do you have a valid backup?"
• Customer: "Yes, of course."
• Tech Support: "When you came this morning, was anything printed out on the printer?"
• Customer: "Yes."
• Tech Support: "And what did it say?"
• Customer: "Just like it says every day"
• Tech Support: "Would you mind reading that off to me?"
• Customer: "Error XX: Backup Operation Failed."
We have a customer with tons of data produced every day. They insisted on backing up the stuff themselves, though they had a maintenance contract with our company. Anyway, one of their administrators put a DAT tape into the drive every night and removed it the next morning, labelled it, and stored it in a closet. One day the disk crashed. They called us because they couldn't restore the data from tape for some reason. It turned out that although they did put a tape in every night, remove it every morning, label it, and store it, what they forgot to do was run the backup script. They had a year's supply of backup tapes, neatly dated, and all of them empty.
Don't feel bad, glatt.
I feel bad, but I'm also a little amused by it. Conflicting feelings. I can see the humor in the mistake. I'd feel totally fine if I heard from the guy that he's cool with it. I left him a voice mail, but he hasn't called back. Probably won't.
It was supposed to be these potato-pancake things (officially called llapingachos, traditionally from Ecuador. I was originally searching for a recipe for latkes, but these looked easier.) I have never successfully made anything that required frying, I don't know why I keep attempting it.
frying is (obviously) very temperature sensitive.
Too hot == burned outside and/or raw inside.
too cold == soggy oily yuck.
Good tools (Cast iron for pan frying, bigger is better, deep fryer for deep frying duh, bigger helps here too) make a world of diifference.
my pancakes are fried, technically. the first batch... for the dog.
then after the skillet gets to the sweet spot of hotness and oilyness... the just work for the rest of the bowl of batter.
Deep frying... I have a problem with that too, since I'm impatient and try to load up the fryer/pan with too much cold food and it chills the oil too much. It's hard. It's extra hard to do in tiny batches.
don't give up. :)
I was watching one of those cooking shows over the weekend, and they were doing a thing on fried foods, and spent a lot of time obsessing about how the temperature of the oil has to be perfect. They had a thermometer and they calculated the volume of oil needed so there wouldn't be too large a drop in temp when the food was added.
Apparently, it's pretty complicated.
There's one way of showing how to do something where you make it as easy as possible to understand, and there's another way where you make it pretty much impossible to understand, so that what you're doing appears so much more difficult than it is, and therefore you appear to be some kind of expert for knowing how to do it correctly.
I'm unhappy because Lumberjim doesn't think I'm funny.:sniff: :cry:
Yeah I just finished that pack about two minutes before I knocked over the container...and they're all nearly the same color too :bawling:
That's a bitch. Why not buy them pre-sorted?
I am also a beader. Now I need to know what kind of beadwork you do, along with any other particulars ... you a stringer, loomer, or off-loomer?
(me, off loom, mainly peyote)
To avoid similar catastrophies, I try not to use multiple-slot bead containers, unless they are something larger, like crow beads or the big dangly bits for finishings.
I am also a beader. Now I need to know what kind of beadwork you do, along with any other particulars ... you a stringer, loomer, or off-loomer?
(me, off loom, mainly peyote)
I thought peyote came in "buttons" ... not "beads" ... ???
I'm not a beader per se, but am beading a stole I am knitting. I have found the ideal container to hold the beads that I need to dip into now and again with a crochet hook - an old inkwell. Designed and made to be not-knock-over-able. Fantastic (and it used to belong to my grandfather, too!).
That's a bitch. Why not buy them pre-sorted?
I am also a beader. Now I need to know what kind of beadwork you do, along with any other particulars ... you a stringer, loomer, or off-loomer?
(me, off loom, mainly peyote)
To avoid similar catastrophies, I try not to use multiple-slot bead containers, unless they are something larger, like crow beads or the big dangly bits for finishings.
I started making jewelery...my ankles are a bit larger than the size 0's that live around here so I can hardly ever find jewelery to fit my ankles/wrists. My mom really liked what I was making, so she tried it, and makes jewelery now too (her style is very different though). We have so much fun making them that now we've got tons more than we'd ever need, and are trying to get around to selling them (I've sold a few through work already, and so has she.)
Buying them unsorted makes the cost of making a bracelet/anklet about $0.25 for me, including the labor of sorting the beads. So I can sell them around $2.00 or $3.00 and buy nicer beads for the next batch.
I've got a few of those separate containers, and they're very nice but they're a lot more expensive than these small boxes. Also, I'd love to learn other ways of using the beads, those loom thingies look pretty neat. :D
Also Also, knitting is cool, but I'd definitley need to learn from a person, not a book. (and I don't know any persons who knit.)
And now having revealed this, you'll have to post your art on its own thread.:)
Ouch. That sucks. Forgive me if this is a stupid question, but is it not possible to buy several bags of beads each with a different single colour?
I'm faced with a question I'm afraid to ask, cannot defer, avoid, or alter. And I don't know any likely good answers.
BigV - why don't you post it here. I'm sure you'll get lots of answers.
I think you're making the mistake of thinking you've got it all figured out in advance, BigV.
I understand that feeling, and I know that it causes unnecessary misery. I, too, invite you to share.
Thanks for the offer.
The question is only pertinent in different company. "You" cannot answer it, nor can I, nor can anyone else here at the cellar.
I do appreciate your desire to help.
Okay. I accept that. But I still suspect you're bearing the weight of advance thinking.
I am continuously guilty of thinking continuously. Occasionally, I overthink things too.
I do so out of habit, among other reasons. One reliable side effect is to reduce my fear of the unknown. But in this case, it is not working.
I have alluded to it in other situations many many times. It is quite "like me" to think and think... as I am doing now. But I am still uneasy.
I am being forced to do something I do not want to do. I am unsettled as to my response to this situation.
being on vacation all week and staying on the phone with coworkers working on scales that I generly work on ,
Then just now getting off the phone with a customer ( that these SAME folks have been at all week ) with the customer saying " I know that you are on vacation , BUT I am past getting frustrated !!!!!"
we talked , I have to be there 8am Monday morning .
YeeHaww !!!!! Hell of a vacation !!!!!
[youtube]xchVEK86i1U[/youtube]
I think I'll have a beer now .
I am now officially 0-3 in the date department. My opportunities this week have been eliminated by, in order (1) deciding to forego sexual interactions outside of marriage for awhile, (2) three day migraine, and (3) a staph infection of the leg.
Is there a patron saint of pathos?
Ouch. That sucks. Forgive me if this is a stupid question, but is it not possible to buy several bags of beads each with a different single colour?
Yeah...but it costs me more to make the bracelets....it's always cheaper to buy in bulk, ya know.
Put a handkerchief over the vacuum clearer nozzle and suck 'em up.
I can't get into gabbly and I don't know why. I've always been able to before.
Open a completely new browser window...that usually fixes it for me.
I can't get into gabbly and I don't know why. I've always been able to before.
i didnt do it!
I'm in the midst of a vicious summer cold. I have to be better by Sunday morning so I can go row.
If I'm can't go, I'm going to be pissed.
That sounds ominous bullit. I hope you're coping ok with whatever it is you're moving on from.
It could be ominous, but it could also be very liberating! Or both.
Bullitt, remember we're here if you need a sounding board, mate.
Just to follow up.....my husband bought me flowers, dressed up in a suit, and yes.........He well made up for sexual transgressions. A happy ending to my madness. I guess you have to point out to people what they are not doing sometimes........and say why? So they can say...what the hell...why not.
It could be ominous, but it could also be very liberating! Or both.
Both. I've put up with her for too long and it's time for me to just let go and move on with my life. When you cannot even tell a person your thoughts without them having a meltdown on you, that's a pretty good sign that things just aren't right.
Elaboration: Broke up with the g/f of almost two years in May, spent the summer recuperating with my buddies. Now, we're all back at school, and me and the girl share the same group of close friends. In the course of talking and hanging out, etc., I discovered that I still had feelings for her. I asked her if she wanted to get back together and she said she would think about it.
Fast forward two weeks to two nights ago, she still has not given an answer and I decide that I want to just be single for awhile and not mess with this whole restarting the relationship business with her. On top of the fact that I was reminded through various means of the reasons I broke it off with her in the first place. To give you an idea, I have never encountered someone so damn frustrating and hard headed in my entire life. Not even middle schoolers compare to this girl. So I tell her straight up, no beating around the bush what I'm feeling about this and she explodes. Accusing me of "playing games" and "messing with her head".
Yeah I'm done with this.
Oh yeah and the icing on the shit cake here, her surprise 21st birthday party is tonight and literally every one of my friends here at school will be there. Awesome.
I'm getting more "cannot attend" notices for the wedding than I would have liked. :(
My folks have been planning to go to the grocery store this for the past two weeks, but something keeps coming up.
New haircut!
I never like a new haircut.
I love mine, get one almost every day.
I hope you like yours soon.
I always do RK, just takes me a couple of days to work out how I want to do it (which usually involves, finger combing and air drying).
Yours is high maintenance:p
Bullit
"May the bridges we burn light our way forward."
My husband found that on a bathroom wall in a bar. Not bad......
My son is very sick, both ears infected, high fever, lot of congestion.
In yet another fucking chapter of the life that is mine that seems to be going down the toilet.
I have to go to the courts tomorrow to file a stalking restraining order.
I cant remember whether I have mentioned, the delivery guys ex girlfriend thinks its all my fault that they split up.
I swear to you guys, I am not!!
I know I fuck around playing the flirty tart...and well... I am...but I am a harmless flirty tart. I am not into him at all and would never lead him on like that.
They split up because she is really disrespectful and abusive and manipulative.
I mean, she came into work 2 months ago and took a swing at him! I know he is not faultless, but I am tired of her shitty txt messages and now I am getting them from friends of hers and she is badmouthing me around town.
I am so fucking over everything.
Aww sheesh, ducks. She sounds a little Fatal Attractiony. Don't you wish we could eradicate crazy beeatches and bass-turds?
Hang in there! :)
I think I have swimmer's ear.
I am a total fuckin idiot.
I was supposed to start my 10 week training program this week for LHF race, not next week like I thought. WTF??? !0 years of running has apparently shaken a few connections loose in the ole' brain box.
I'm working away on my little excel sheet, plugging dates in, going backwards from the day of the race. I look at the start date, then look at my deskblottter. Back to my computer. "FUCK!".
I am such an idiot.
I've done NO running this month. For some reason I thought I was supposed to start next week. Crap.
Lymphoma is bothering me.
Lymphoma is bothering me.
Very sorry to hear that - I am assuming this is what is wrong with your spouse?
Yeah- he went to the doctor this morning and came by work. The doctor said it's probably lymphoma (he can already tell but can't hand that diagnosis without the bloodwork)- we're going to the specialist next week.
Feels like a death sentence.
I'm still at work. It's hard to design shit when your hands are shaking wildly. I'm going to take off early.
I'm so sorry. Try to be positive.
You guys can start calling me "sunshine" if you want.
Take all the positive energy we are sending you Cicero, and share it with your husband. Good luck to you both, and don't forget we're here for you!
God Cicero, how worried you must be. Like LabRat said, we're here for you.
Sorry to hear that, Cicero. Let us know how things are going.
Home for my lunch break...
Working the return desk today
Been yelled at already for about 10 things I didn't have anything to do with
Sadly, not even by customers
Almost cried twice so far
When I get back, it's only 3 1/2 more hours...right?
Yeah- he went to the doctor this morning and came by work. The doctor said it's probably lymphoma (he can already tell but can't hand that diagnosis without the bloodwork)- we're going to the specialist next week.
Feels like a death sentence.
I'm still at work. It's hard to design shit when your hands are shaking wildly. I'm going to take off early.
take heart ~
Home for my lunch break...
Working the return desk today
Been yelled at already for about 10 things I didn't have anything to do with
Sadly, not even by customers
Almost cried twice so far
When I get back, it's only 3 1/2 more hours...right?
aww. :neutral:
Almost cried twice so far
When I get back, it's only 3 1/2 more hours...right?
Razz, that sucks. Is work often like that? It's horrible when work makes you miserable; we spend such a large portion of our lives in our workplace.
Retail is like that, it's rather soul-crushing. If the customers don't hate you for something you have no control over...then your managers are mad at you for something someone else did...and the employees are all talking about something you didn't do. I'm just dealing until I can find something better....that's how life works.
Well......found out a few hours again that one of my very good friends and teammate died of a heart attack (supposedly genetic) earlier today. He was 19, athletic (not fat), straight A student with a 34 ACT, etc. Damn...
I was high at the time which just made it ten times worse because you're really sad and really happy at the same time and it just splits you apart.
I am really sorry to hear that.
i recently launched my business and most of my clients (at least the ones i've invited) have followed me over from the old firm. but i got a call today from one client, who happens to be an old friend, that pissed me off. he and the mrs are staying at the old firm "because firm______has made us a lot of money and has taken good care of us."
are you freaking kiddin' me? the firm doesn't even know you exist. THE ADVISOR did the work fixing some serious problems and setting up a good plan and walking you through estate planning, etc... THE FIRM is going to fill my vacated office with some kid that is literally two weeks out of licensing and not even able to advise independently yet.
Whatever. I actually don't mind losing them as clients because they are pretty high maintenance/low return clients anyway. it's just the principle.
l123, you're pissed off because you got a free dose of honesty, revealing your good fortune at dodging a high maint/low retn luuuuuser?
time to recalibrate, bro.
Pierce, that's awful. It's never an easy thing to lose a friend, but it's less unexpected as you get older, I think, as you hit 'the zone'. Must have been terribly shocking to lose a friend so young. My condolences.
l123, you're pissed off because you got a free dose of honesty, revealing your good fortune at dodging a high maint/low retn luuuuuser?
time to recalibrate, bro.
yeah, i know. don't know why it irritates me either. i think i'm probably more irritated that in a month they'll sit down with the new guy who will dismantle the accounts to reshuffle money into something he was taught in a class - and charging them a few thousand.
Thanks rkzenrage and Dana. Actually, I think what scares me the most is how he died, not the actual fact that he died, which still does scare me. From from I've heard, he just had a heart attack out of nowhere with no prior warnings.
Sad thing is that I might not be able to make the funeral since it is a state away.
Sorry ph, that is pretty depressing stuff.
Sorry to hear it too PH.
It happened to the brother of a close friend of mine. We were 23 and he was 21 - the pathos is he'd been drifting for a couple of years and had finally got his life sorted and had a place at Uni in the Autumn. It seems odd to remember, but it was the 50th anniversary of VE Day - unusually warm for May and everyone was celebrating. He was playing a game of kickabout on the village green. Dead before he hit the ground.
The thing I will always carry with me is my friend singing and playing a song at his little brother's funeral, and how brave and old-world courteous his Dad was, thanking everyone individually afterwards, especially the friends.
This is kinda small potatoes in comparison, but a rabbit is staring at me through the screen door. An hour or so ago I accidentally crushed the rear legs of one with the tractor... eyes filled with terror dragging himself around with his front legs... everything zen?
Wait, the rabbit you smashed is the one staring at you? Might be zombie rabbit. If not, you may have made some serious enemies in the Bunny Kingdom, my friend.
We will travel in pairs for a while. Two go out one comes back.
Wait, the rabbit you smashed is the one staring at you? Might be zombie rabbit. If not, you may have made some serious enemies in the Bunny Kingdom, my friend.
We posted simultaneously! Go back a page for mine! ;)
a rabbit is staring at me through the screen door
Eerie.
We will travel in pairs for a while. Two go out one comes back.
Don't be the one wearing the red shirt.
funny!
"bummer of a birghmark, hal"
Supremely crappy ass weekend. Have to call the doctor tomorrow about some very worrisome things. We'll see, I guess.
eek. all the best with that....
i started college last week and i still have no friends.
laaaaammmme.
PoL, that isn't lame. It isn't aways an immediate thing when you first go to college. Are you living on campus?
Yes I'm living on campus. It's a really hard transition. It's hard to just put yourself out there and meet people...mainly because I'm pretty shy.
Y'know PoL, that's the experience of a lot of students when they first go to college. Probably more students find that first transition hard than don't.
Whenever you hear tales of college life it seems like one big party and big gangs of mates. But that takes time, and for most kids the first few weeks are a serious adjustment. It's harder to relax and make friends if you aren't even on familiar ground: but the unfamiliar becomes the familiar pretty quickly.
Your classes and any extra-curricular stuff you get involved in will bring you into contact with people and at some point you'll find you've slipped into a group with a bunch of others.
But don't give yourself a hard time over it. There's nothing lame about it at all, you're doing something that most people would find daunting.
Yeah your probably right. It's hard going from high school where you are really close with a few people and you feel comfortable with those people and then suddenly they just move away and you have to make completely new friends.
You're right though, I just need to give it some time.
Thanks for the advice, I appreciate it.
Points, just try to talk to as many people as possible. If there is someone sitting next to you in class, strike up a conversation. Nine times out of ten nothing will happen but there is a very good possibility you that your new really good friends will be people you just randomly meet.
I was very shy in high school and can still be when I'm in a depressed mood. Just practice with conversation skills and watch what other charismatic people do and try to copy that, within reason. It is much easier to make friends if you show confidence and don't talk in a monotone voice. It will take a while but it helps a lot.
Dana is right too, it took me until late March my freshman year to find a group of people that I really connected with. I met them by being dragged to a party by my roommate who I hated and meeting someone I met randomly earlier that year and met his friends who needed a bassist for a band and we've been friends since.
Points, just try to talk to as many people as possible. If there is someone sitting next to you in class, strike up a conversation.
That's easy for you extroverts to say!!!
Anyway.. what's upsetting me? I've lost a filling. The tooth hurts like hell. It appears I'm going to have to see a dentist. (I was hoping nuclear war, or bird flu, or a helpful public transit bus would take care of me before it became necessary.)
What makes you think I'm an extrovert?
Forcing myself to talk to someone or go to a social gathering is what helped give me confidence.
Oh. Look. More abnormal test results, completely unrelated to the others. Delightful.
Apparently two specialists wasn't enough. I will now be seeing a perinatal specialist, a neurologist, and an endocrinologist on a regular basis for the next 7 months, in addition to my standard OB visits.
I did an end-run on my OB though. He didn't feel qualified to minutely interpret the endocrinology lab results, so he insisted I go to a general practioner first, who would then tell me if I needed to be referred to an endocrinologist. Fuck that shit, dude, I'm not made of copays and free time. An endocrinologist is perfectly capable of telling me himself if things are mostly fine and just require monitoring.
So today will be appointment number three this week, plus another three already scheduled for next week. I swear to God, no one better try to put me on bedrest. That shit just can't happen.
Sorry Clod. Try not to focus too much on the bad stuff, you don't need to add stress to anything else that may or may not be going on.
sorry, chica. we're here to vent to.
no one better try to put me on bedrest.
If they do, may I offer my bed?
Clod - hope all goes well.
I'm trying to... bed rest.
I hope you start feeling better soon.
I burned my tongue and I can't find my pass for the sport center
Saturday night I made a bed in the bathroom and spent the night, and half of Sunday, in the three-foot space between the wall and the toilet.
My stomach is still not quite right.
Awwww....are you ok honey?
Awwww....are you ok honey?
No. I need a nurse. Real bad.
Can I take your temp the ole fashioned way????? Can I?
What kind of a nurse are you, DucksNuts? A real bad one?
Windows 2000 Server and .NET Framework are really pissing me off.
Can I take your temp the ole fashioned way????? Can I?
Do you know the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer?
The taste.
nu uh...
they both taste shitty.
bit and broke mercury thermometer as child.
truuuuust me on this one.
What kind of a nurse are you, DucksNuts? A real bad one?
They say practice makes perfect
I argued with my wife, daughter, and son this morning. I guess it's me. I think I'll spend some time alone.
I'm getting my port put in tomorrow and I'm pretty nervous--actually, VERY nervous and my looming hair loss is freaking me out. I'm scared, lonely, nervous, exhausted. I haven't gone to class at all....I'm not being very strong or positive about this. all I do is make mistakes. sigh.
Brianna, I wish you lots of strength.
thank you, labrat. thank you.
You can do this Brianna. I know it's scary, but you can do it.
Go Brianna, you know we'll all love you when you're bald as a coot.
Especially if you post pictures!
Is someone going with you Bri? I'll be thinking of you...
Take things one bit at a time, one breath at a time if need be ... you'll do it, Brianna. After tomorrow's appointment, do something to treat yourself. Sending best wishes your way.
Brianna, I'm thinking of you ....
Is someone going with you Bri? I'll be thinking of you...
Yes, my mom is going with me.
Thanks to all of you--I'm having a pity party today--however, I am feeling better right now. I just need to get a hold of myself. Thanks for helping me out. You guys are the best!
I never passed any of the fragments of the stones they blasted...
Getting some more blood again.
I have not told my family.
I don't want to get cut on again.
Bri, hoping all goes well with you tomorrow.:)
rkz, you shouldn't keep secrets from your family. It will only make it worse, when they find out. I do hope you pass though suckers and begin to feel better, soon.
rkz...my dad had kidney stones and he started drinking apple cider vinegar. Just a little each day. He swears it dissolved his kidney stones between one visit and the next because they were there one visit, then he went back to have them blasted and they weren't there. maybe you could give it a try?
Bri, good luck with the port. You'll be so glad you've got it once it's in though - on some strange level that really doesn't make any sense. About your hair, have you considered shaving it off before you start chemo? Someone (women in particular) find this empowering because it's like taking back some control over your own body. I don't know if it works like that for everyone, but I know it does for some and I suspect you might be one of the ones it'd work for.
Rk, that sucks :( *hugs*
Bri, don't be down on yourself for missing classes and 'not dealing with it'. You're going to have good days and bad days, and that's okay...you're allowed to have those down times. Thinking of you hon.
Thinking of you Bri.
Rk - I have heard the apple cider thingie too.
I'll do the cider thing. It helps my arthritis when I do a shot a day anyway.
The meds I take for them don't do shit.
Hope it went well, Bri.
good luck with the vinegar rkz
This is minor compared to other people's problems but here goes: I miss my boys.
I know that's like the colleague who comes to work in tears and has to go home because her hamster died, but I've not been without them in a year (almost to the day) and they are such people cats... All I can think of is what they must be thinking - me not there. Ridiculous of course, a sensible person pointed out recently that cats aren't people. But I am, and a silly one at that.
I'll send HM another me-mail tomorrow. I need to resolve this misunderstanding anyway, but the sooner the better with my babbas missing me (me missing them).
Which misunderstanding is this?
Ah. Ahem.
I got mad at him because he got mad at me for not going to Water Workout. Because I genuinely had a troubled stomach.
I confronted him when he came back (from yoga), trying - honestly! - to sort it out without festering. He kept his back to me during the conversation, which riled me ("I'm cleaning the sink!" yeah first time in 3 months...)
I eventually got him to admit he did have "a slight issue" with the fact I'd sampled food during my visit to the supermarket to get cat litter ("Well you must have been feeling better then" was the comment that kicked it all off). In my burned-skin-sensitivity his admission meant he'd been lying to me when he said originally the probelm was all in my head not his.
So it ended up with SG going out & getting drunk (paying only for 1 pint) and being walked home by a stranger.
I came to Mum & Dad's because I couldn't handle 1) my anger, 2) my hurt, 3) my guilt. All my fault.
Oh and I stood on the patio table this morning, trying to get Diz down from the roof of the kitchen. It collapsed. I am bruised to buggery - which serves me right - but it adds to the guilt. I know he wanted to replace it, and he was the one who told me to let the cats out the skylight ("it's not a high roof") but I feel like a shit.
That's the real reason I'm unhappy. I'm trying, but I'm still a mess and have given my oldest friend good reason to throw me out. And I miss the boys on top of that!
Sundae.....give him a call.
SG, go back. And maybe take him something nice. Some biscuits you baked. A picture you drew. Something. Flowers from your parents' garden. If you want this to work, it's not important who's fault it is. It's important to let him know that you want it to work and you still appreciate him.
Sounds to me like he's being arsey because he cares. One of the hardest things to do is apply "tough love". Another hard thing is accepting that for what it is. If he didn't care about you so much, he wouldn't give a shit if you skip class. I reckon he cares enough that you can just let this go without further discussion and yet both still know where you stand.
By the way, how much do your parents know about your current situation?
I'm with Dana and Monster on this one. Life consists of loads of set-backs in amongst the good stuff, and you can either let them be a minor set-back, or let them drive you off course. Don't let this drive you off course - think of what you've achieved so far, and keep up the momentum. Say "Hi" to HM from the Cellar!
I reckon he cares enough that you can just let this go without further discussion and yet both still know where you stand.
You're probably right. I just get scared that I've done something unforgiveable and worry myself silly while he is completely unaware and has already moved on.
By the way, how much do your parents know about your current situation?
Nothing about my financial situation. I don't want to worry them. I've told them that HM & I had a falling out, but none of the details (like going out & getting drunk for example).
I'll spend the weekend here, then go back and face the music. And I'll take something back for him too, I like that idea.
Heya shug, I think a weekend away will do you good :) But....phone him and talk today if you can. You'll feel a hell of a lot better...and so will he.
I'm having a *really* shitty day at work. Culmination of a lot of little things just going to pot all at once. I would just say fuck it and leave for the rest of the afternoon, but if I do it's just going to make the rest of the week as bad as today. Damn it. :mad2:
My last (real life) social outlet has been officially taken from me. Depressing beyond words.
Oook...I'll try...
I don't drink, and I live in a small town. One or the other of these facts about me really wouldn't make any difference, but the combination of them, does. I don't know anyone else who doesnt drink. At all. I'm not saying I force others to do it, I'm just stating facts. My highschool friends all moved off away from me and became....persons I didn't want to be around anymore. (Became very self-destructive in various multiple ways) and so I don't have them to fall back on. I'm probably the youngest at my work, so even other girls around my age only go out to the bars when they want to have fun. Seriously, don't mind if others drink...but I dont want to be pushed around about it, AND I don't want to be the only sober person in the room. Watching a bunch of drunks be dumb is only fun for so long. PLUS the girl who invites me out the most often is always trying to get me to meet her creepy 26-28 year old guy friends. Hm...a bunch of drunken...older...horny guys....in a house in the middle of nowhere...where I'm the only person in a sober state of mind....sounds real safe, no?
So my last refuge was my family. Luckily, my family is REALLY FUN, so I wasn't missing out on much. Sure they get together and drink, but there's no pressure for me to drink with them (obviously) and there are a few in the family who are around my age and therefore don't drink with family as well. Cool. Now...they had this time...a boy's night out...every thursday. The Man's Club...a joke really, but since I have always gotten along better with the guys in the family (they're funner) I've always hung around them. And well, I got invited and included to the man's club as well, with one other girl (my cousin's cousin....don't think we're ACTUALLY related through that, but meh) so her and I would go every week and hang out and have fun. Great, it's my only social activity, and it was a blast.
Two guys who aren't family come too....they are the owner/leader of the club's best friends. One of those guy's wive's found out that there were "girls" in the club...and said...either we go or he does...so now...I'm kicked out as is my other friend. They've said "We'll just have to try and have more family nights" (where anyone is welcome)...
I could only go once or twice a month as it was before because of my work but the point is that I had something to LOOK FOREWARD to...now...I really don't. Not with all of the stress of bf living so far away and girls at work doing the whole "hey what are you doing ton--- oh wait...how old are you again?" over and over.
Blugh. Shitty.
Probably left stuff out...but hey..can't fit my WHOLE life story into one post...this one looks long enough as is.
I got nuttin.
:vomit:
Ok, now I got nuttin. sux0rz!
Razz, sorry you're going thru such a tuff time. I don't drink either - we are probably the only ones on this site that doesn't. Anyway, maybe you & the other girl, could plan other things or try and get some of the guys in the group who aren't married, to hangout. Small towns, I know, don't have a lot to offer to people your age. They have no outlets. Hope things work out for you, though.
I should mention, the other girl is more manlier than all of the men combined. She drinks, talks, and swears like a sailor. Not exactly my sort of company.
(Thanks though...didn't mean to sound snippy at you, that would've been helpful if not for her um...personality.)
One of those guy's wive's found out that there were "girls" in the club...and said...either we go or he does
This kind of attitude really bugs me... what is this, does she think you & your "cousin"are just spreading out on the pool table for all the guys? If this woman thinks the situation you describe is too much for her husband to handle without her there to hold his leash, then they just have no hope together. What's next? The guy can't go to the grocery store because his hand might brush the cashier's when he pays? Or he might see a woman in a cute pair of shorts lean over to get something out of the freezer case?
and girls at work doing the whole "hey what are you doing ton--- oh wait...how old are you again?" over and over.
Invite them over to your place.
Torture them.
Will it help? No, not a bit. But it'll make you feel much better.
I should mention, the other girl is more manlier than all of the men combined. She drinks, talks, and swears like a sailor. Not exactly my sort of company.
(Thanks though...didn't mean to sound snippy at you, that would've been helpful if not for her um...personality.)
The other under-age girl? Who?
Well whoever it is ....sounds like....
She's my sort of company...... Most of my female companions have to at
very minimum talk. Especially if we are in public.
In fact they have to at least be one of the 4 descriptions you have outlined above....or any variation therein and you missed a couple adjectives!
:)
I am home alone :(
My parents always get up earlier than me, it's a given.
Last time I was here on a Saturday I got up about 09.30 and they were both out, but were back by 10.00 and we all went to town together.
Today I woke up at 09.47 and the house was quiet. Oops, I thought, better scramble to be ready by the time they get back!
So I gobbled down breakfast, showered, tidied up and have been sat here waiting since 10.10. I was sorta hoping they would be impressed too - expecting me to still be in bed when I'm waiting for them like a good girl.
All I can assume is that they figured I wouldn't be ready in time and just went into town without me. By the time they get back, not only will I have missed a chance to wander round with them (and I was going to get measured for a new bra today as well - an ego boost as I know I'm shrinking but want official confirmation) but I have also lost the chance to prove I really was up and ready at a reasonable hour.
:mecry:
:mecry:
Is there something you can do around the house for them? Tidy something, sweep somewhere? It'd impress them, and make you feel a little better for having done
something.
:comfort:
Actually they came back about 20 mins ago and Mum was impressed that I was up, dressed smartly and wearing make-up. She didn't say so exactly, but she did say I looked lovely. (Usually when I'm here I just sit & read in tracksuit bottoms).
She's agreed to go back into town with me - saying she enjoys walking around anyway. This is code for "I'm so pleased you're acting normally I'll do anything to encourage it" but I appreciate it all the same.
From grumpy to happy - yay!
I made a little girl cry today.
Of course it wasn't deliberate and I found out later that it wasn't really my fault but I still felt like crap. Kind of still do.
I teach a class with four kids aged four or five. Three boys (two smart but boisterous, one low level and fairly quiet) and one girl (sweet and well behaved, but lower end of mid-level abilities, low confidence).
We were running through the vocab, chorusing the new words. She did ok with a few simple words, but a three syllable word came up, and it was all too hard. She froze, I slowly sounded it out, but it was too late. The lip started trembling, I could barely manage "hey, its okay" before the tears burst. :bawling:
The parents are always in the next room watching through the window, so I tapped on the glass and beckoned her mum into the room. There's not much in a 4-year-olds world that can't be fixed by a hug from mum. Mum stayed for about ten minutes, helping her settle and rejoin the class, helping with the words, and was able to leave after a while. Things were okay for the rest of the lesson.
I spoke with her mum afterwards (who, thank goodness, speaks English fairly well) and she explained that she had scolded the girl just before the class (I don't know why) and this had thrown her confidence and led to the tears. I feel a little better for this, but not much. When a cute sweet little child starts crying in front of me, and I am the trigger, if not the whole cause, of it, no amount of rationalization can wholly wipe away the emotional reaction. :(
I know I have posted some callous-sicko sounding stuff here, mostly about how to weigh heads, but really, I'm not mean.
ahh well, I'm purged now. Thank you cellar.
Just wait, ZenGum. One day she'll make you cry and you will be even.
That's my prophecy to you.
Just wait, ZenGum. One day she'll make you cry and you will be even.
That's my prophecy to you.
Gee thanks heaps, I feel sooooo much better now. matter of fact, YOU have made ME :cry:
:p
:lol:
Well I guess if all the kids I have made smile and laugh also return the karma, that aint so bad.
that aint so bad.
Teaching Vocab? And I thought only "southerners" said ain't;)
Teaching Vocab? And I thought only "southerners" said ain't;)
:lol:
What's
really funny is that I
debated whether to use an apostrophe and make ain't.
I used it purely for theatrical effect. And we all knows, there aint no apostrafee in aint. Thats mah ejamacashun torkin there.
Teaching Vocab? And I thought only "southerners" said ain't
I use ain't. In England you use the apostrophe :)
Glad to know it has worked it's way across the globe. :D
[SIZE="2"]Though I'm sure it's been around a really long time[/SIZE]
Glad to know it has worked it's way across the globe.
.......yes.....from here to there. Though, in fairness, apart from in the South it's usually pronounced a little differently. In the North it tends to be more of an "ant" or "int" sound. It's difficult to convey, but part of the sound gets swallowed.
I found mold growing on my toothbrus since I didn't use it over the weekend (I went home from college).
But the real question is, why is there mold on my WIRELESS MOUSE?
:eyebrow: you need some better ventilation and a more sterilized living area
blech:greenface
When a cute sweet little child starts crying in front of me, and I am the trigger, if not the whole cause, of it, no amount of rationalization can wholly wipe away the emotional reaction. :(
Would it make a difference if it was a pig ugly child?
.......yes.....from here to there. Though, in fairness, apart from in the South it's usually pronounced a little differently. In the North it tends to be more of an "ant" or "int" sound. It's difficult to convey, but part of the sound gets swallowed.
When I talk to my cats, I use the cat-speak I heard growing up.
Aren't you in my Dad's voice becomes
amcha, and
ain't (a word I don't use otherwise) becomes
ent (i.e. "So you ent done nuffing wrong then ah? You'm not guilty then amcha?") It's vaguely Dickensian.
I found mold growing on my toothbrus since I didn't use it over the weekend (I went home from college).
But the real question is, why is there mold on my WIRELESS MOUSE?
Mold grows when there is moisture.
The real question is why is your mouse moist?
It's the underside and near the trackwheel. No idea man, seriously. My hands aren't wet when I use it. Baffling.
(i.e. "So you ent done nuffing wrong then ah? You'm not guilty then amcha?") It's vaguely Dickensian.
That, to me, sounds so "ebonic".
That, to me, sounds so "ebonic".
I shall think of that next time I hear him :lol:
It may read the same, but saarrrf London in those days was pretty much as white as ice cream. Maybe I'll record on camera at Christmas as a study in native speech in the British Isles.
Would it make a difference if it was a pig ugly child?
It could be cute and sweet and still pig-ugly. (Although are any children truly pig-ugly? I like to think they all have different potential ;) )
Or it could be gorgeous and have just headbutted you in the nuts on purpose (not you personally, SG.), in which case it's crying would maybe not have quite the same emotional effect on a person....
I shall think of that next time I hear him :lol:
It may read the same, but saarrrf London in those days was pretty much as white as ice cream. Maybe I'll record on camera at Christmas as a study in native speech in the British Isles.
I'm sure he'll love to know what your doing:D
It's the underside and near the trackwheel. No idea man, seriously. My hands aren't wet when I use it. Baffling.
The point is the air in your house must be (very, very) humid. Does your bathroom open into the hallway, or to your bedroom? Do you spend the majority of the time with the door to your room closed?
You need to open a window, get some airflow going. Aside from that, you should also check for a leak in your water heater--those often live next to the air conditioner, and if there's open water next to the air intake, it will be blowing wet air throughout the house.
I found mold growing on my toothbrus since I didn't use it over the weekend (I went home from college).
But the real question is, why is there mold on my WIRELESS MOUSE?
I wouldnt be worried about the mould on your toothbrush...its the POOP molecules I would be worried about!!
Would it make a difference if it was a pig ugly child?
SNIP
It could be cute and sweet and still pig-ugly. (Although are any children truly pig-ugly? I like to think they all have different potential ;) )
Or it could be gorgeous and have just headbutted you in the nuts on purpose (not you personally, SG.), in which case it's crying would maybe not have quite the same emotional effect on a person....
I don't think ugliness would make much difference in this situation, but if the child habitually behaved in a nasty way, I think it would lessen the emotional impact on the teacher. I'm not saying that it would make it okay to have such a child crying, nor that such a child has any less rights. Just that it wouldn't push my emotional buttons as much.
Pig-ugly? Well, one of the lads in that class has already earned himself the
unspoken nickname of Booger-boy, because he has not yet mastered tissue technology and wiping techniques. Bluerchchchch.
On dry days he isn't too bad though.
I thought I heard someone say moist? Sorry....
Back to what you were doing.
I found mold growing on my toothbrus since I didn't use it over the weekend (I went home from college).
But the real question is, why is there mold on my WIRELESS MOUSE?
Several thoughts:
Congratulations! You moved into that apartment, what, two weeks ago? If that? And you have already achieved a level of grottiness that most people would take months to reach! Well done! I am glad to see the student lifestyle is being carried on according to its finest traditions. Bravo, sir!
May I suggest you purchase a large supply (at least one complete four-person set per house resident) of crockery, cutlery and utensils. That way you can let the dirty dishes
really build up. An unmatched collection of random plates from your local thrift shop really adds charm.
No student residence is complete without empty pizza boxes. If you don't have at least two per room (and four or five in the designated garbage area) you should try going through other people's garbage.
You will also need several toasters and kettles. The best ones are unreliable and preferably dangerous. Don't worry about buying these, as people will give them to you. Customize them by smearing ketchup and such down their sides, and cooking this on.
Even if you and your housemates never touch drugs, a token bong or two is always a nice touch.
Your username seems extra ironic right now.
Seriously, doing some cleaning, and getting some airflow and maybe a dehumidifier might be good. If there is mould on your mouse ... what is that environment doing to your lungs?
Several thoughts:
Congratulations! You moved into that apartment, what, two weeks ago....blah blah blah....
Seriously, doing some cleaning, and getting some airflow and maybe a dehumidifier might be good. If there is mould on your mouse ... what is that environment doing to your lungs?
I moved in 2 months ago.
Yeah, we should. It's just that it has been raining for 3 hours every day for a whole week lately, I guess. Our place doesn't seem that humid....but I dunno. So far there's no big cleanliness problem, just the kitchen trash
needs to be taken out everyday, which sucks cause we let 2 or 3 full trash bags lie in the corner until we take them all out. Stinky, yes yes.
The thing that peeves me off to no end are the neighbors' kids who run up and down the stairs at all hours and the noise filters right thru the paper-thin walls between the units in my townhouse complex.
The thing that peeves me off to no end are the neighbors' kids who run up and down the stairs at all hours and the noise filters right thru the paper-thin walls between the units in my townhouse complex.
Perhaps you need a box of rusty star nails.
Perhaps you need a box of rusty star nails.
Nah, in six months time the clumping of the artificial feet would be even worse.
[SIZE="1"]
I still maintain that I am
not mean.[/SIZE]
I know it is very very trivial, but dammit, it upsets me.
Arsenal's game is not being televised this weekend. Fox Soccer Channel is going to televise games for relegation bound teams but can't be bothered to air the top-of-the-table arsenal game. bastards.
The tensions in the party are getting a little much. I'm all for a fight, but it's getting nasty and personal. Don't get me wrong, I can handle myself just fine, but there are times it would be nice to just y'know....be on the same fucking side? I'm not going to let the bastard drive me out like he has other people. And it's always women he focuses on. The man's an aggressive bully. I am tired of having to fight all the time. The irony is, like most bullies, he characterises me as the aggressive one, and is currently trying to persuade people that I'm a bully *chuckles* Of course, this would be easier for him to do if he hadn't committed one of his insane diatribes to print (email).
I sometimes wonder if I want to keep doing this. I am good at what I do, I am committed and I work hard...I am ready for the fight most of the time and am usually quite sanguine about having to deal with this side of politics, but the past few weeks have been a bit heavy.
They won't know how much it gets to me, because I put on my game-face when I go into meetings and I make sure my own side turns up and supports me. But still...it gets a little psychologically draining when it's constant.
Hang in there, Dana--don't let the jackass get to you. Just keep seeing him for the fool he is, and he'll implode eventually...especially since everyone's seen his crazy email. He might be kicking it up a notch because of that, trying to cover himself; but he'll just dig himself a deeper hole. Sit back and enjoy the show. :)
*smiles* thanks blue. That's pretty much the advice my mates have been givin me as well.
Maybe he will combust, fueled by his own rage? Or maybe he'll learn how to send out an e-mail? (that's is the part that really bothers me)Well, it probably won't be e-mail Dana!
:)
Dana, may I suggest that you recruit some of the people who The Jerk has driven out of the party. Get them to come to the meeting(s) and relate what the used to do for the party, and why they resigned.
If it is your word against Jerkie's, it might help to have four or five other people telling similar stories.
Just a suggestion.
Good luck, be strong, Jerkie is probably going into full counter-attack mode because he can't defend his email diatribe ... his best hope is to knock you out before he is called to account for it.
I hope this doesn't sound patronizing. You sound like you can take care of yourself.
Wish I could ZenGum, but that kind of ambush would count as 'Uncomradely behaviour'; have to be very careful not to do something which could be twisted against me :P
There ways around it. I am exploring options at the moment. An important factor in this, is that whilst he, as an individual, is engaging in this kind of behaviour, he is also part of a larger faction (as am I). Right now his faction are characterising this as him just being a hothead (very convenient when your rottweiler attacks the right people no?) whilst miming actions of peacemaking in our direction.
If I take this further it will amount to a declaration of war, and the pretence of peace will no longer be viable.
Hmmm...
What if, instead of sitting passive, you offered a decisive peace-making move? Basically, a statement declaring such-and-such (i.e. ridiculous bullshit--don't say that of course) is a diversion from our real goals, let's go forward and get to the real work. That would make you look really good, and maybe even work, since most people would probably love to grasp the opportunity to just forget about it.
And it would suck the wind out of his sails, for a while anyway.
Actually, that's rather close to what I am plannng to do:P
The Chair will be putting forward a motion a) supporting the Prime Minister (who's coming under a lot of internal fire at the moment) and b) expressing confidence in the CLP officers and that said officers should be supported in their work and should not be subject to, or hindered by, personal attacks or harrassment.
That's a first step. The next step will be less peacful :P
Hmmmmm, while I usually favour peacemaking, I'm not certain the Blue's idea would work here. Sounds to me like The Jerk is a serial offender. If he gets away with it this time, he'll just do it again, soon. It might be necessary to get him fully removed from the scene. Which, given what you've said about the factions, might be both difficult and escalatory.
Thanks for reminding me why I hate politics. The goals may be worthy, but the crap you have to wade through... bleurch.
*laughs* I know. Politics is a very, dirty business. There are times I enjoy that side of it...and times I really don't.
The other thing that's upsetting me is the whole being-in-love-with-one-of-my-best-friends thing. Most of the time I get by just fine and enjoy his company and that's great. Sometimes though it creeps up on me and I just feel totally fucking awful. Spent half of last night crying. I know, from tentative forays in conversation, that he is totally not interested in being involved with anybody, despite the fact he is attracted to me (I'm pretty sure he is, and so is our mutual friend). It's just such a waste, we'd be great together. I know it, the two people who know us both and know how I feel, know it. But I can't say anything explicitly about it because of how he feels about getting involved again. Don't want to make him uncomfortable around me ya know?
I keep thinking, maybe at some point the time will be right and he'll see what's in frnt of him...or maybe I'm kidding mysef and I ain't really his type. But...I dunno, there's definately a strong connection between us.
Like I say, most of the time I just shove that shit to the back of my mind and get on with being his friend, but every so often it breaks my heart and right now it feels like a physical ache.
Well ZenGum, you sound like you know what you're talking about, so if you consider a moment...a decisive peace-making move is not the same as peace-making at all. ;) As Dana said, of course, it's a first step.
Oh Dana...as for the more important stuff...seduce him now.
Sure, there's the possibility it might not work, but life is too short to keep wondering, "what if." You have to take that chance--trust me on this. Even if it results in disaster.
emo's... it's almost ironic
oh, and ben lee
:eyebrow:
- - - -
Dana, I agree, seduce the guy now.
on notice at work.
come in.
close the door.
"not working out for me..."
*gulp*
ouch.
does "on notice" mean canned or "last warning"?
Ack, bad show BigV. Hope you can find a way through this mate.
@Blue and Monster. I have taken the cowards way out.....a mutual friend (fiend?) is going to subtly sound him out.
Thing is, I tried subtly sounding him out ... though I thought I was making it fairly obvious where I was coming from...but as my friend pointed out to me, he's a bloke and is likely not to have seen the signs. So, when he's saying to me he isn't interested in getting involved with anybody, too many compromises etc etc, he probably hadn't caught on that I was asking him with myself in mind:P
Well ZenGum, you sound like you know what you're talking about, so if you consider a moment...a decisive peace-making move is not the same as peace-making at all. ;) As Dana said, of course, it's a first step.
Ohhh, silly me. You mean like that move where you smile sweetly at them and bob your head and flutter your eyes and draw near and
then unleash and kick them as hard as you can in the crotch, and keep up the sweet smile while you're doing it? Always a goodie. I can be so naive sometimes.
@DanaC
Don't be subtle.
Be plain. Be clear. Yes, we xys appreciate it, I know this one does.
A guy I knew from maryland is dead.
I wasn't too good friends with him, never really talked to him, but caro was going to go to his band's gig the very day after it happened. She's really upset, as are most of my friends in the states.
http://www.baltimoresun.com/news/local/bal-rider1018,0,5026541.story?coll=bal_sports_util*laughs* I know. Politics is a very, dirty business. There are times I enjoy that side of it...and times I really don't.
Another Cicero Anecdote:
I was on a certain board that shall go unnamed here on the Cellar that was highly political and very involved with law (high profile here in the U.S). I was constantly being attacked verbally by this person at board meetings and through e-mails...and he was sending out nasty e-mails about me behind my back to the other members. He was trying to get me removed from the board which I had been a part of for 3 years, and he was a new member. Within a couple of months I did not respond to any of his personal and political attacks with any fervor, and he ended up digging his own grave and lying in it within a short period, and he was asked to resign in a not so civil manner. I had nothing to do at all with his removal from the board, but I did get to cast a vote in favor of when the time came.
Moral of the story...Do not be baited and then bite, as he will surely cause his own destruction. All you have to do is offer peace, be patient, and sit back and watch the flames lick higher and higher.
:D
Just read your post
Ibram...sorry about your acquaintance. It sounds like you are there for your friend that was deeply affected by it. Nice work.
Upsetting? Eh. More like a comedy of errors.
Wednesday evening I stupidly left the lights in my car on. (The alarm that's supposed to alert me to this doesn't work. Or rather, it rings all the time when the door is open, so I'm used to ignoring it.) I jump started the car from our minivan.
Thursday at work I ONCE AGAIN left the lights on. I waited for AAA to come do a jump start. After my 30 min. drive home, I waited a few minutes and tried to start the car. It was fine.
But I guess it really wasn't--I could tell as soon as I put my key in this morning that the battery was half dead. Not that surprising; it's over four years old. So I drove my daughter to school in the minivan and then went to Auto Zone for a battery.
It took about 5 minutes to place the new battery in and attach the cables and, lo and behold, the car started just fine. At this point I was looking at being 10 or 15 minutes late for work--not bad, all things considered. All I had to do was put on the bolts that hold the battery in place.
Oops. I dropped one. Unfortunately it didn't just fall all the way through to the ground. It took me some time to fish it out. In order to do so I had to get the battery out of the way, so I now put it back in and reattached the cables. The - cable was sliding around on the terminal, so I tightened it up a bit. And the conector just broke in two.n
Now, I'm not very strong, so anything I can destroy with my bare hands is in pretty bad shape. So, one more trip to Auto Zone for a new connector. (Not to mention a can of hand-cleaning glop.) This time everything went well and I got the battery connected and bolted down, and got to work an hour late.
(Bonus: One fun thing I got to do after arriving was to explain, fruitlessly, to a vendor that "GMT" and "London time" are not the same thing, because GMT doesn't change for Summer Time.)
Nice story, SteveDallas!
A personal tip: if you change the oil in your car yourself, always remember to replace the oil drain plug before you pour in 3.5 liters of new oil. :smack:
And always, always, keep a few old towels in your car... so many uses.
Upsetting? Eh. More like a comedy of errors.
Wednesday evening I stupidly left the lights in my car on. (The alarm that's supposed to alert me to this doesn't work. Or rather, it rings all the time when the door is open, so I'm used to ignoring it.) I jump started the car from our minivan.
Thursday at work I ONCE AGAIN left the lights on. I waited for AAA to come do a jump start. After my 30 min. drive home, I waited a few minutes and tried to start the car. It was fine.
But I guess it really wasn't--I could tell as soon as I put my key in this morning that the battery was half dead. Not that surprising; it's over four years old. So I drove my daughter to school in the minivan and then went to Auto Zone for a battery.
It took about 5 minutes to place the new battery in and attach the cables and, lo and behold, the car started just fine. At this point I was looking at being 10 or 15 minutes late for work--not bad, all things considered. All I had to do was put on the bolts that hold the battery in place.
Oops. I dropped one. Unfortunately it didn't just fall all the way through to the ground. It took me some time to fish it out. In order to do so I had to get the battery out of the way, so I now put it back in and reattached the cables. The - cable was sliding around on the terminal, so I tightened it up a bit. And the conector just broke in two.n
Now, I'm not very strong, so anything I can destroy with my bare hands is in pretty bad shape. So, one more trip to Auto Zone for a new connector. (Not to mention a can of hand-cleaning glop.) This time everything went well and I got the battery connected and bolted down, and got to work an hour late.
(Bonus: One fun thing I got to do after arriving was to explain, fruitlessly, to a vendor that "GMT" and "London time" are not the same thing, because GMT doesn't change for Summer Time.)
This was us recently. But after the last time we bought a charged battery starter thing so I can jump it myself :D
I've actually thought of that--what kind did you get?
Everstart, apparently. it was about $40 iirc
Jim bought me one of those when my blue jeep kept turning its lights on by itself and draining the battery. It's yellow too.
What's upsetting me today? The cellar sucks lately.
Headaches every fucking day for I don't know how long now. The neurotic thing is I keep feeling like the weight of my hair is somehow partly responsible and if I cut it all off this will be better.
Your hair could be contributing?
How is everything with bub going?
Oh and Jinx....2nded
Yah clod I mentioned this in gabbly but I dunno if you heard me over the chaos so...
I spent several months growing my hair out to a nice length that I was satisfied with..and started having migranes...alot....so I decided it was probably partly due to my hair...and went and had it cut
didn't help at all.
P.S. 3rded jinx
How is everything with bub going?
This question does not make any sense to me. :)
But don't worry, I'm not going to go all nutty and shave my head or anything. I just get grumpy when I get headaches, and my hair getting in my way puts me in a worse mood. I've cut my hair short several times before, it was like that back when I very first
joined the cellar... Ah, good times.
This is what I try to go for, but it never quite works out looking like this of course:
bub is typo for hub(by) is my guess.
Oh. Look. More abnormal test results, completely unrelated to the others. Delightful.
Apparently two specialists wasn't enough. I will now be seeing a perinatal specialist, a neurologist, and an endocrinologist on a regular basis for the next 7 months, in addition to my standard OB visits.
I did an end-run on my OB though. He didn't feel qualified to minutely interpret the endocrinology lab results, so he insisted I go to a general practioner first, who would then tell me if I needed to be referred to an endocrinologist. Fuck that shit, dude, I'm not made of copays and free time. An endocrinologist is perfectly capable of telling me himself if things are mostly fine and just require monitoring.
So today will be appointment number three this week, plus another three already scheduled for next week. I swear to God, no one better try to put me on bedrest. That shit just can't happen.
How is everything with bub going?
This question does not make any sense to me. :)
FUCKING BUGS!!!!
Well, I dont know if they are sexually active, but they are driving me nuts...wiggling inside however they do.
Crawling all over my puter screen.
Oh...and apparently, one shouldnt run over matchbox cars with the lawn mower, the little bastards take revenge and fly up and leave a hole in your chin....and your shin.
Ewww! I hate creppy crawlies .....Ducks...that's bad karma running over a matchbox car....did you not consider the terrible effects your callous actions might have upon the lives of innocent matchbox drivers?
Seriously though, bad luck on the chin-shin thing. Hope they ain't too bady gashed :(
The thing that's upsetting me today (I seem to be spending an inordinate amount of time in this thread just lately...) is that my eczema has flared up, on my face this time. I have the low level constant eczema on arms and legs and so on, but this is one of those sudden, really fucking itchy, swollen red face jobs.
*nods*yup. Emotional (as opposed to busy) stress tends to flare it up.
How is everything with bub going?
bub = baby?
Things have settled down. All subsequent testing has come back normal, or at least abnormal in ways it was already expected to be, so we're just in the old standby mode of "watchful waiting." I've had to officially break out the big pants. But I get to find out the gender in another four weeks!
Yeah, sorry, I didnt know bub didnt translate.
Are you an *all belly* type pregnant person, or does it go on everywhere?
Glad to hear things have settled.
Yes, I'm generally really good about weight gain--actually, last time they were worried toward the end because they thought I hadn't gained enough, but baby measurements were all good, I just had "thin skin," apparently. :) Which means the big pants are still too big by a long shot, but the normal ones are out so I have no choice.
Which means the big pants are still too big by a long shot, but the normal ones are out so I have no choice.
...but to wear no pants?
Nah, just wear the big saggy ones and repeatedly hitch them up all day long.
get you some braces ( suspenders ) they will keep a hitch in your Get-a-long ALL day !!!!
How bout a tent dress? I understand they're popular...
Pinafore's are very popular and great for pregnancy.
i'm deathly ill.
I either have a chemical burn on an acid reflux hole burnt in my esophagus. It hurts like you could not imagine. And fucking Taiwanese drug laws wont let me have anything other than like, a little bit of codeine for it. Not even the good stuff, and not enough of it.
Endoscopy tomorrow to check it out, and hopefully start actually fixing it.
I sympathize with you Ib. I come from a long line of antacid poppers. I had an endoscopy last year. It's a piece of cake, and they'll give you some good drugs there.
Awwwww Ibby, that sounds really unpleasant.
Hope you are feeling better soon.
The worst part of it is, mi madre won't let me stay home from school even though im just about dying. She says, I can either go to school or get checked into the hospital. Well, fuck that then.
But daaamn... it hurts.
Today is all about things going wrong.
Yesterday when I was at the gym I asked at Reception what time Water Workout was today. It's usually 13.00, but I thought I'd best check as it has an asterisk next to it saying Term Time Only and this is Half Term holidays. explained my reason for asking to the lady, she checked the computer and said, "No it's still on at 13.00."
So I turn up today at 12.50 only to find it starts at 12.30. The lady yesterday shouldn't have checked the system, but instead got the folder from the back of Reception and looked it up on the laminates. So today is now a rest day.
And I got a letter through from the Council. Three months after making my claim they advise me that I am entitled to Housing Benefit. Nothing about Council Tax Benefit but I can only assume another letter will follow regarding that. They will pay £180 a month towards my £230 rent. So I checked online to see if I could get any further help to make up the difference, and nothing made much sense. I called the dedicated claims line (freephone number) and the man I spoke to was very confused - I am getting Income Support at present, even though I claimed Incapacity Benefit (basically sick pay). He advised I called my local Job Centre. Which I did - they denied being able to help at all as it's an issue re payments and advised I call Job Centre Plus (in Belfast). Which I did. The man on that line told me the claim had been cleared. What? Oh apparently there's a note on my file to say it's been cleared (never did find out what cleared meant) but they can't proceed until Income Support has been reclaimed.
I asked - does this mean I was overpaid Income Support? Will I receive less on Incapacity Benefit? How much do I have to repay? He couldn't answer any of these questions, he could just read the notes out to me (re case cleared etc). He said as the most recent note on the file was on Friday they probably wouldn't be able to do anything for at least a week while it was being processed. So I asked was it worth calling Income Support? "I doubt they'll have looked at it yet but it can't hurt," said he. Hurt my phone bill actually.
So I left it with the agreement that I would wait a week and call Income Support to see if they can shed any light.
And I'm going to Art Therapy this afternoon and the idea scares me. Walking into a group full of strangers (with mental problems) and having to do things and make choices and be the new girl.
ETA - wouldn't you know it? I called the centre this morning re Art Therapy, just to check it was still going ahead today. The lady seemed surprised I'd asked and said she couldn't see any reason why not. I explained it was my first time and I'd been advised to call but she reiterated there was no reason it should not be going ahead. Fast forward to this afternoon - the tutor doesn't attend during school holidays. A member of the class is left the key to the store cupboard and the members get on with their projects. Not really a suitable session for a new starter.
Shoulda stayed in bed today.
Sorry, just venting.
Headaches every fucking day for I don't know how long now.
About a month ago I was getting borderline migranes almost daily. Turns out, I was on a bacon binge (BLT's, then used leftover bacon to flavor several different meals that I ate as leftovers for awhile). Stopped the bacon, and wha-la, no more headaches.
Although it never bothered me before, it apparently now does. Sodium benzoate gives a good friend of mine migranes...and it's in a lot of places.
Something dietary perhaps? :2cents:
They will pay £180 a month towards my £230 rent.
That's about standard for housing benefit SG. They work to what is referred to as 'fair rent assessment'. That means they have an idea of what they consider to be fair rent for any given area and property, trouble is the fair rent assessment doesn't actually match what is usually charged in an area: unless you are living in low rent accomodation, such as a housing assoc. (council) house. It's usually standard that if you are in the private sector you will end up paying about £5-£15 p/wk towards your rent. They also take account of room numbers. So if for instance you put down that you use the living room, the kitchen, a bedroom and a bathroom, they may say that you are only really entitled to the cost of studio/bedsit type accomodation and dock your benefit accordingly (e.g dock £5 for the separate, therefore, extra room).
That's how it used to work, I think it still does work like that. When I was on housing benefit for my house, i was paying £110 per month towards.
the winey babys around here who have it made in houston and snotty richies
Login websites should really have a "Forgot Your Username And Password.
I'm nowhere near Houston and I'm definitely not rich.
Actually, being far from Houston doesn't upset me.
Sucked losing a job today though. That's gonna leave a mark.
Sucked losing a job today though. That's gonna leave a mark.
Was it a job you liked?
losing A job or YOUR job, V?
Yes.
And the money was good. And I was good at it. But I blew it. There has been considerable destruction in my life recently and this is just another sad casualty. I have only myself to blame.
Sorry, second job. Moonlighting.
Considerably more than beer money. More like tuition money. Hey. I was lookin for a job when I found that one, right? Time to beat the pavement again.
That blows. chunks.
edit: oh, you dick....i thought you lost your JOB.
Sorry you lost your job V. That really sucks. I"m pretty sure you'll pick something else up pretty quickly if you set your mind to it though.
That blows. chunks.
edit: oh, you dick....i thought you lost your JOB.
Sorry, didn't mean to misrepresent my situation. I clarified asap.
I'll tell you what's making me unhappy today.
We got a new kitten yesterday and it came complete with fleas. Nasty little suckers they are. I've treated her, but I'm going to have to do the other cats too I think. They've jumped off her and onto everyone else.
I'll tell you what's making me unhappy today.
We got a new kitten yesterday and it came complete with fleas. Nasty little suckers they are. I've treated her, but I'm going to have to do the other cats too I think. They've jumped off her and onto everyone else.
Maybe you know already, but here is an effective way to remove fleas from carpet:
Take a wide, flat plate and place it in the center of the room. Put a broad (so it can't fall over) candle in the middle of the plate. Put about 1 centimeter of water in the plate, with detergent to break the surface tension. At night time, light the candle and leave the room. Repeat each night until no more fleas are caught.
The fleas will be attracted to the warmth and hop towards it, thus landing in the plate and drowning. It works, I have done this. It is chemical free but be sure to set it up carefully so it isn't a fire hazard.
I feel constantly sick to my stomach. Two weeks atleast now of this constant sickly feeling of tension. Didn't get to sleep til gone 5am, woke up at 7am felt shit decided not to go into today's lecture on the anglo-norman state. Also cancelled my dentists appointment.
Big meeting tomorrow. I have the next few hours to decide whether or not i'm going to set off a bomb in my branch (metaphorically speaking of course :P). Trouble with setting off bombs, is it's impossible to know the extent of the damage...or the direction of the flak.
I'm probably gonna go for it. I am more nervous than I have ever been about anything else my whole life.
Sorry V, hope the pavement beating works out.
Yeah BigV. So, I'm confused, is it your second job you lost? As opposed to your main job?
Either way it sucks. Getting the sack is never fun. I know it from bitter experience. Even worse if you know it's your own fault :( Hope you feel better about things soon. From some of the stuff you've been posting, it's clear you've been having a seriously tough time just lately. Just remember your Cellar mates are always here.
Hey Ali, I know it's not pc to reach for the chemicals...but I always find Fleabombs are very effective. Cheap and fast.
Hey Ali, I know it's not pc to reach for the chemicals...but I always find Fleabombs are very effective. Cheap and fast.
Candles OR fleabombs ... but for &%$#'s sake not both.... kaboooooooom. No more fleas...
OMG I was just reading this thread and a big ass ROACH crawled across my keyboard. Fuck. Now I'm all creeped out. They are bad here in the building, but JHC.
**pausing**
Sorry to hear about the job, V. Dana, take it easy or your gonna end up with more than just and aggrivated case of eczema!
Not sure if this is "upsetting" or making me "happy". The Japanese restaurant that we ate at a couple of weeks ago - was closed yesterday. Evidently for a few days. Looks like they are fumigating/painting and looking for a new cook. The thing is, the day we ate there, seemed to be ok. Except for the fact that we were sitting there, had just received our food and started eating. I happened to look over to my right, beside my plate and noticed a ROACH crawling on the table:eek: Slammed my napkin down on top of it and just sat there for a sec. Yeah, wasn't that hungry. Wondering if I'm not the only one who had an extra guest.
Good luck V - you didn't need that on top of everything else. Hope something comes up soon.
Big meeting tomorrow. I have the next few hours to decide whether or not i'm going to set off a bomb in my branch (metaphorically speaking of course :P).
I'm probably gonna go for it. I am more nervous than I have ever been about anything else my whole life.
Go for it Dan - you have the guts for it and it's better to stop him now - he's already hurt enough women and damaged the Party. I will admit I wouldn't do t myself, I'm too much of a coward, but I have faith in you.
Not sure if this is "upsetting" or making me "happy". The Japanese restaurant that we ate at a couple of weeks ago - was closed yesterday. Evidently for a few days. Looks like they are fumigating/painting and looking for a new cook. The thing is, the day we ate there, seemed to be ok. Except for the fact that we were sitting there, had just received our food and started eating. I happened to look over to my right, beside my plate and noticed a ROACH crawling on the table:eek: Slammed my napkin down on top of it and just sat there for a sec. Yeah, wasn't that hungry. Wondering if I'm not the only one who had an extra guest.
You ignorant philistine! That was your dessert! And furthermore, it is a sign that the chef honours you and respects your footwear. Have you no idea about sashimi at all??? :p
don't be hatin' - if i'm gonna have dessert, I atleast want it to "not move".;)
Candles OR fleabombs ... but for &%$#'s sake not both.... kaboooooooom. No more fleas...
Well fortunately for us, we don't have carpets. Just a big mat in the lounge area of the house. Other than that it's timber, so not a great environment for fleas to live in. I suspect they mostly will choose to live on the cat(s) who have now all been treated with a blob of stuff on the back of the neck. I noticed one flea which jumped off the cat onto me last night was moving very slowly, so I think it's working. I've had no bites yet this morning.
I hate fleas. They're still bothering me now, although mostly the bites on my ankles and feet rather than the ones on the cat. She seems to have stopped scratching. Lucky her!
BTW Zen, although the candle trick sounds pretty cool, I have to wonder if this little trick has ever led to a house burning down. I don't think I'd feel comfortable leaving a candle burning while I'm asleep.
BTW Zen, although the candle trick sounds pretty cool, I have to wonder if this little trick has ever led to a house burning down. I don't think I'd feel comfortable leaving a candle burning while I'm asleep.
Maybe you could use an LED light instead.
I wish my mom would get off my damn back about my damn TV volume. I always try to keep the level down off enough as not to bother them, but...well...and most TVs now-a-days don't have a front panel earphone jack.
I'm always telling my kids to turn the tv down. I find it really annoying to hear someone else's second hand tv noise.
:rolleyes: I doubt your kids try to be as discreet as me.
What are their ages?
10 and 11...and believe me, they try to be discreet. lol I'm the sort of person that sleeps with ear plugs in because I like the silence...unless I'm in the country. Then I sleep just fine without earplugs.
Well, my folks' bedroom is about 20 feet from my room, so nights really aren't the problem.
OH well...maybe it's just your mum then. Or maybe she likes peace and quiet during the day so she can think her own thoughts without interruption?
I guess she must kinda feel like the weight of the world is on her shoulders sometimes huh?
OH well...maybe it's just your mum then. Or maybe she likes peace and quiet during the day so she can think her own thoughts without interruption?
Actually, I think it's mostly my step-dad who complains. His study is right next to my room, and the sounds travel thru my wall into his study, even with my door shut. It's not a problem on weekdays since they're @ work, just in the evening if he has to do something in his study. He tells her, and she tells me.
Of course, sometimes my mom hears it up in our kitchen.
Anyway, I did a little TV volume experiment earlier. I set the volume @ my normal listening level, went out of my room, closed the door, and went into the study, and yes I heard it. Not sure what to do there. 'Course, my step-dad could turn his TV up, and shut his door. Then, I went toward the kitchen, and my TV got harder to hear.
I don't know what to do, but stop watching TV...
not an option.
I guess she must kinda feel like the weight of the world is on her shoulders sometimes huh?
I suppose. I certainly don't wanna piss her off, but I gotta try to bring a sliver of happiness to my mediocre life too.
even sicker today.
nnnnghhhh
even sicker today.
nnnnghhhh
Why doesn't yer ma just take you to a doctor (not necessarily a hospital)?
even sicker today.
nnnnghhhh
Have you been for your endoscopy yet Ib?
Thanatos...what about putting carpet on the walls of your room? That would insulate it a bit, and of course you could still pin things to the wall.
Thanatos...what about putting carpet on the walls of your room? That would insulate it a bit, and of course you could still pin things to the wall.
Can't afford it.
bugger. I guess you could always keep your eyes open for some cheap end of line stuff though. sometimes you can get a pretty good deal that way. Particularly if you're not incredibly fussy.
Thanatos, have you got a tv card in your computer? Maybe watch tv online when your stepdad's about, that way you can use headphones ?
@ Ibby, aww honey, that sucks. When's your endoscopy?
well it was SUPPOSED to be yesterday but i was running a fever of 101... so the anesthesiologist wouldnt do it. its rescheduled for friday now.
I'm actually feeling a little better this evening, after getting a little bit of food in me.
Hope you feel better soon Ibby, fevers and the like arent fun.
Glad you're feeling a bit better. Here's hoping you have your procedure on Friday instead.
Than, what aboout those amplyfying headphone stes they advertise? So you can overhear other people's conversations and shit? Or are there wireless headphoners these days? Can you have the TV moved further away from your stepdad's study wall?
Couldn't you ask your mom if she would pay for some better insulation on that wall? Take her with you and repeat the experiment you did.
BTW Zen, although the candle trick sounds pretty cool, I have to wonder if this little trick has ever led to a house burning down. I don't think I'd feel comfortable leaving a candle burning while I'm asleep.
True, but if you use a short wide candle that cannot fall over ( a tea-light on a stand will do), in the middle of a dish of water wider than the height of the candle, in a non-flammable plate, in the middle of the room ... it's gonna take some McGyver-like magic to start a fire. Also, you can use it in the evening before you go to bed.
As for the LED idea, I don't think it is the light so much as the warmth that attracts the fleas, so the trick might be to get a pen-torch with an incandescent bulb and a removable head, and stand that in the dish. Voila!
Thanatos
If carpet is too expensive, there are plenty of cheap and tacky options you could consider lining the wall with:
old mattresses (as used by garage bands around the world)
bubble-wrap
egg cartons (absorb sound wonderfully - often used in kindergartens)
corrugated cardboard (cut up old fridge boxes)
foam rubber (probably the most effective from this list)
priceless medieval tapestries
old blankets
cork board (as used in pin-boards)
pictures of naked women (so when your step dad comes in to complain, he gets distracted)
The problem with most of these is that you'll need some way of keeping them attached, and I don't know if you're folks would be too keen on having old blankets nailed to the wall. Also many of these could be a fire hazard. And they're likely to be ugly, although a stylish blanket could be passed off as a wall hanging.
High tech solution: get you step-dad some anti-noise headphones. When they detect a sound wave, the speakers produce an opposite wave (as in, the same wavelength but 180 degrees out of phase) which cancels out the original wave. I have a friend who has headphones that do this, I think such speakers are available. Put them in your S-dad's study.
Thanatos, have you got a tv card in your computer? Maybe watch tv online when your stepdad's about, that way you can use headphones ?
@ Ibby, aww honey, that sucks. When's your endoscopy?
Hey Dana! Isn't today the big day?!? What is up?!?
:D
*grins* oh yeah. Today was the big day. I just attended the most difficult meeting I've ever been to. It was absolutely awful. The secretary was unable to attend.....which left me (acting secretary) taking the minutes. When the chair read out my letter, sent to the secretary in accordance with the rules (rule 6b, in case you're interested :P) all hell broke loose. The vice-chair, the treasurer and the vice-chair's wife left the meeting half way through, with the vice-chair pausing at the door to issue a declaration of war. From now on, he says, every officer post will be contested, and there will be votes of no confidence in the chair at every clp meeting. People made threats and accusations and it was very heated. My people turned up, they voted the right way and the motion has been referred to the general committee.....now i just have to make sure none of my people cry off on Friday (general committee meeting) when the vote for whether to set up an investigating panel takes place.
For the next few months we have all out war
Get well soon, Ibbie. You're a nicer kid than you know.
Get well soon, Ibbie. You're a nicer kid than you know.
Aw UG, you big lummox... that's not true.
...It'd be pretty hard to have a higher opinion of me than i have of myself.
that's not true.
Oh yes it is. Some of us actually care, even if we've never met. you need treatment dude.
Yeah Ibs....you need to get better man...
so you can post more cute photos of that haircut! :D
WHOOOOOSH
what was that sound you ask?
the sound of things going RIGHT over datalyss's head, my dear!
UG said:
You're a nicer kid than you know.
I said:
I'm not
You said:
Oh yes you are!
But my point was that I know JUST how nice a kid I am because nobody thinks higher of me than me.
JEEEEZ everything gets SO unfunny when you gotta go ES'PLAIN it all!
oh, yeah, and im starting to feel better this evening too.
*grins* oh yeah. Today was the big day. For the next few months we have all out war
Well it's out of your hands now - I still believe it was the right thing to do. Good for you, bring it on! :jig:
*chuckles* Thatnks:) I do think its the right thing to do...I also think it's very dangerous politically and might damage a)me, b) the local party, c) our chances at the next council elections.
But...I'm the Women's Officer for this CLP and I'm damned if I'm going to just ignore him in the hope he'll move onto some other comrade; likely female and likely new to the party and politically inexperienced, or a long time member who's in a vulnerable state of mind (i.e one woman who, whilst sitting in her car in the hospital carpark, with her husband dangerously ill in intensive care, was treated to a 15 minute haranguing phone conversation with him accusing her of all sorts of stuff and threatening her with dire consequences after she'd opposed him on something).
I honestly don't see how I can do that. The fact he's also my political enemy and a leading voice in the other faction, frankly that's just gravy and makes the decision a little easier (in some ways). If this man was in my faction I'd take him to one side and explain in no uncertain terms that he has to stop or I'll take action. And I would be true to my word on that.
Tonight is the Local Government Committee (LGC, lot of confusingly similar acronyms in political parties:P) the body that liaises between the two local labour parties and the unified authority they both send councillors to. The man I've lodged the complaint against has this particular body sewn-up. It's going be a fairly unpleasant meeting. Friday is the General Committee, on which we have the edge on numbers and a sympathetic (read best friend and supporter) Chair. They will dig up every last half dead delegate for that and do everything to disrupt. That also is likely to be an unpleasant meeting.
Then there's an executive once a month, a General committee every month and an LGC every month.....basically, if we have reached a ceasefire by New Year I'll be very surprised.
Then there's the Council Group. I have one friend I trust absolutely and two I like but who blow with the wind. Its a group of eleven, one of whom I have just lodged a complaint about, another who is his best friend and Group Leader.....and the Leader's wife, the Group Chair...their decades long friend the Group Whip, and their other decades long friend the Group Secretary....We meet as a group once a month.
I suspect by Christmas I'll have unwittingly achieved the infamous Size Zero. *chuckles*
This is hard Dana...you must get stressed and not eat like me. If you don't eat, you don't think correctly. You know that and I know that. To win your war you must take care of number 1 properly. There's a time to fight your battle but there is another Dana, that needs her to be there for her, and her immediate needs. Those take priority.
#1 Food.
#2 Rest- think outside of the box whilst drifting off. Fantasize.
#3 Soak your feet in hot water, then lotion and massage, and relax.
#4 Imagination (butterflys in the valley maybe) + #2
#5 Sex
#6 Don't let the negative ass get into your head...if he does anyway, well.....turn his voice into that of Mickey Mouse.
Hey- get happy. That will piss off your enemy. Go to a picure show. I bet you have some free time to show yourself a good time.
:D
You make me proud Dana....gutsy. I like it. :D
Don't forget to celebrate the tiny battles in the war!!
But my point was that I know JUST how nice a kid I am because nobody thinks higher of me than me.
Maybe so, but none of us know how highly you think of yourself, which why we're trying to help.
oh, yeah, and im starting to feel better this evening too.
I suppose if you wait long enuf, things just heal themselves.
I wish my mom would get off my damn back about my damn TV volume. I always try to keep the level down off enough as not to bother them, but...well...and most TVs now-a-days don't have a front panel earphone jack.
Can't you listen to the TV with headphones at sensitive times?
Can't you listen to the TV with headphones at sensitive times?
...most TVs now-a-days don't have a front panel earphone jack.
:rolleyes:
@ Cic. Sound advice mate. Lot of friends telling me the same.
I am much more relaxed tonight. Tomorrow will be hard, but I have managed to spend several hours today just quietly pottering about doing wardwork, and went and had a pub lunch with a mate. I think the stress levels have started to die down as I have committed to the course of action. What I always find difficult is waiting and indecision. Having to wait until I knew exactly who could be there and who could guarantee to be there for the next 3 meetings etc, before finalising my decision, that was stressing me most of all I think. Now I am sure of my course. It might succeed, it might flounder, but it's the course I am on and I'll live with it. Was still a tad stressed last night regarding a comrade who seemed annoyed at me in the meeting and I wasn't sure why. He voted with us, but I could tell smething was up and he's someone whose opinion matters a lot to me (a ward colleague, the councillor I trust). I had one of those flashes of realisation at 2 am and knew exactly why he'd been annoyed: I had been working on the assumption that since my friend *** had been ringing aound as well as me and had talked to him, that she had filled him in on the details (details were kept sketchy from all but 3 people until the day before) and she'd been working on the assumption that I had...I realised at 2am, that my colleague had walked into that room without knowing what was about to happen. All he knew, was that I was going to do something and I needed his support.
God bless him he gave that support and voted with us, but that was a horrible position to put him in and that kept me awake for the rest of the night. He's a good man, straight down the line, no games. So...I knew I had to make things right with him and I think he had every right to be very angry. Hence was fully prepared to grovel. Tried calling him in the morning several times, no reply.
He evengtually got back to me at about 3pm and accepted my explanation and apology without rancour, bless him. He's concerned about the route I've taken, but fully supports me. Once I had that sorted out I felt fine. Went to tonight's meeting, which was a tough one, though not relating to the complaint, and it didn't bother me much. I have a handle on this I think. Tomorrow will be stressful, but it's a different and altogether less consuming type of stress.
Thanks for the advice and ra ras guys. Means a lot to me.
*smiles*
Seems like CA is dealing with another serial arsonist like the early 90's :(
A minor gripe but ...
The last two IotDs were great, but I haven't (yet) been able to come up with any witty posts about either. This is particularly getting me down because these are right in my field. I have started threads about horny moose and wacky Japanese stuff. Yet, with a laughably horny moose, and some seriously twisted Japanese stuff... I got nuttin.
I feel I am letting myself, and the cellar, down. I am very sorry. Between laughing.
You should be ashamed! That's really poor form. No wonder you're upset.
You should be ashamed! That's really poor form. No wonder you're upset.
Thanks for your support in this difficult time :p
I am compensating by imagining what would have happened if the moose had found, not a buffalo statue, but the giant Pikachu ...
Lots of men compensate by imagining things that are just never going to happen. It appears that you're no exception. ;)
Lots of men compensate by imagining things that are just never going to happen. It appears that you're no exception. ;)
To which I can only reply: :p !!!
(Oh, and Mills and Boon novels are all that different, are they?)
no, they're not very different at all. In fact, I can explain the whole plot of any one of them to you right now.
Did you know that all the authors have a formula that they have to follow?
no, they're not very different at all. In fact, I can explain the whole plot of any one of them to you right now.
Did you know that all the authors have a formula that they have to follow?
Err, I was trying to communicate that women's imaginings were similar to men's, but perhaps with a little more plot and fewer identical-twin-Swedish-exchange-students-scenarios.
Not that M&B are all much the same.
I think you may have had enough wine now, ma'am.
yes I know that's what you were doing, and I was just agreeing with you.
god you're annoying. lol
yes I know that's what you were doing, and I was just agreeing with you.
god you're annoying. lol
By M&B's formula it is now inevitable that we will eventually get it on :lol: .... hope your hubby doesn't mind! :shotgun:
so, back on thread ...
I'm what's upsetting you today, huh? :(
No, you haven't annoyed me that much. I wouldn't say you're 'infuriating' which is a prerequisit for a M&B romance. Hubby probably wont mind too much since you live in another country.
You're entertaining me today. I probably should talk to you in another thread.
*sighs* The two Js have fallen out. Had a screaming row and are both now upset. He's been prickly as an old army blanket just lately and picking fights with everyone. I can see him sabotaging good friendships and a good relationship and it really upsets me. I know him better than anybody else, but that means I also know it's pointless trying to get him to see what he's doing. He is absolutely adamant that the aggression, or hostility, or lack of respect etc comes from them first. Any attempt to calm him down and get him to see that his good friend hasn't just started raising their voice at him out the blue for no reason, just makes him feel that you are taking their side, and are just not seeing what he's had to put up with. Cannot see his part in provoking those reactions in people, goes off feeling like the whole world's against him, and that now even his friends don't like him...*heavy sigh* which is of course not true.
Had a text convo with her and haven't spoken to him yet. She clearly understands where he's coming from, but that doesn't make it any easier at the time the row erupts. Having lived with him for 12 years I know the patterns of those rows. She tells me her side of it it's like hearing myself talking to mum back in my 20s. Want to hug her. Want to hug and slap him.
Want to hug her. Want to hug and slap him.
It's worth a try...
Ah well, perhaps it's all for the best. You can't stop other people from making their own mistakes anyway.
(male) J is spiralling down. I don't know how far he'll go. He walked out on her today after picking a further fight. She knows what it's about, as do I. Something from his past he thought he had finished dealing with has reared its head. Complicated, family stuff. Ihaven't seen him like this for....god nine years maybe? It isn't like when we were splitting up, this is a deeper, much older pain.
He won't talk to her about it. Said there's no point, left her in a state and went home. he is trying to deal with it I know, by removing himself from everybody that matters so he can't hurt them whilst he is getting to grips with his issues.
Damnit, he'd got away from this. Found a way he could reconcile himself to the past. Now he's fucking back in that place again. Breaks my heart. Breaks my heart to hear my friend Female J, so wildly upset she is hyperventilating, and can't actually talk when she's phoned me.
I talked her down. I think. She knows what he's dealing with. Butthe whole thing sets off nasty resonances with an old relationship and the hurts she suffered there.
They'll sort it out. But I hate knowing that she's heartbroken and he's in hell.
Wow Dana...Is this your ex-husband?
Ex-partner. We're the same age and we lived together from 18 - 30. He is my oldest and dearest friend. His girlfriend is my closest female friend.
Ex-partner. We're the same age and we lived together from 18 - 30. He is my oldest and dearest friend. His girlfriend is my closest female friend.
I just wrote a long and involved reponse with yet another anecdote....ok...that's twice.. now it's three times...Jesus...I will just say that I am on the receiving end of that kind of situation like female J.
Just don't let her (female J) think that anything about it is her fault, or the cycle continues. She probably didn't even
trigger it. No sense in creating new ghosts while just trying to let go of the old.
Well...I'm going to try and keep it in mind myself.
The going is about to get tough.
*nods* that's pretty much been my tack.
Thing is...I used to be the one dealing with that and this has sent me back to places I didn't want to be.
Fuck. Fuck this feeling of utter helplessness in the face of his overwhelming pain.
Good News: Diagnosis for my lung issues.
Bad News: severe bronchitis/borderline pneumonia
Bad News: need to quit running if I don't want it to turn into full blown pneumonia (deep breathing draws infection deeper into air sacs)
Mixed News: got my period late last week, but that's actually OK, because the Leviquin for my chest can't be taken if your knocked up. Should be off the antibiotic before prime baby making time this month.
Sigh.
*hugs* poor you LabRat. Take the medical advice and avoid running. You'll be back on the baby making horse (so to speak) before you know it.
That's horrible, LR. Please take care of yourself--I suggest you stay in bed as much as possible, and keep very warm until you're completely better. Pneumonia is nasty, nasty stuff.
Oh LR, I just got over pneumonia...its a bitch.
Hope you can get over the bronchitis and it doesnt turn into pneumonia.
This is kinda weird, but whats upsetting me is I just hired a cleaner for my house and I hate that she will be cleaning my mess!!
I'm really OC about mess, and am a bit freaked that someone else will be *cleaning* my house.
She's just gonna be washing the floors, vacuuming and stuff...but still....
feel better LR. p-no-mia sucks.
on a much less upsetting level (only irritating): In setting up my business I cast a skeptical eye and the big boom in office condo buildings so chose not to buy one and am only renting space within an upscale suite of offices. overall, it is absolutely fantastic except the guy who owns the place has the office on the end which gets the setting sun and warms up a little bit. His solution is of course to crank the AC from noon on. As I type, my fingers are absolutely numb. i'm in the freaking desert. my door leads outside where it is 85. i'm freezing here.
This is kinda weird, but whats upsetting me is I just hired a cleaner for my house and I hate that she will be cleaning my mess!!
I'm really OC about mess, and am a bit freaked that someone else will be *cleaning* my house.
She's just gonna be washing the floors, vacuuming and stuff...but still....
but what is she going to be wearing? french maid outfit? something even better? give us the important info ducks. :D
feel better LR. p-no-mia sucks.
on a much less upsetting level (only irritating): In setting up my business I cast a skeptical eye and the big boom in office condo buildings so chose not to buy one and am only renting space within an upscale suite of offices. overall, it is absolutely fantastic except the guy who owns the place has the office on the end which gets the setting sun and warms up a little bit. His solution is of course to crank the AC from noon on. As I type, my fingers are absolutely numb. i'm in the freaking desert. my door leads outside where it is 85. i'm freezing here.
Maybe you can just open the door.
oh. damn...
just kidding, i tried that. the air actually kicks on if i do that (defeats the purpose) and I pick up road noise. eh, I'll live, i'm just bitching.
My husband is away till Sunday and I'm due to ovulate in 2 days time. That's the bad news.
The good news is we had a quicky before he left this morning, so hopefully he's got some long lived sperm. lol I've even heard that the 'girl' sperm do live longer and so if you'd like a girl (which we would) you should have sex 2 to 3 days prior to ovulation so only 'girl' sperm are left alive. I don't know if that's really true or not, but I'm going to console myself with it at this point.
is it just me or has there been a little more ovulation talk in the cellar lately?
I believe you're right. Hey, maybe it'll overwhelm the recurrence of undocumented immigrant bashing we've also been having lately.
A girl can dream...
it's probably because a couple of us are trying to get up the duff with little success.
I think I've only posted one or two comments about my situation though.
Sorry if it bothers anyone.
Lookout, there's a very simple solution: get a piece of cardboard and duct tape it over the air vent(s). Leave a small slot as necessary to regulate how much air you actually need to get through. I did this in my old office and it worked great. Use clear packing tape if you want to avoid looking ghetto in front of clients.
Today the train I was riding on broke down on the way to work. It got as far as Ngarunga Gorge Station, jerked forwards and backwards a bit and then farted and died. The rush-hour commuters sat there for 30 minutes, reading, listening to ipods and looking at the waves in Wellington City Harbour. Woohoo.
Late for work. Again.
And I was doing so well.
Lookout, there's a very simple solution: get a piece of cardboard and duct tape it over the air vent(s). Leave a small slot as necessary to regulate how much air you actually need to get through. I did this in my old office and it worked great. Use clear packing tape if you want to avoid looking ghetto in front of clients.
my brain must be frozen. i was seriously trying to figure out how cardboard and duct tape applied to ovulation. i've done some pretty unusual things, but...
good idea though.
but what is she going to be wearing? french maid outfit? something even better? give us the important info ducks. :D
Meh, you dont want her wearing it....but I would be happy to oblige.....
Here's some population statistics (continuously updated):
107,488,944 Births this year
262,400 Births today
44,198,800 Deaths this year
107,980 Deaths today
154,665 Absolute population growth for today (births minus deaths)
we are obviously not killing enough people.
Are you suggesting I shouldn't be trying to have a baby HLJ?
Are you suggesting I shouldn't be trying to have a baby HLJ?
I was trying to stay with the premise of the thread, and all this talk of babies made me think of the population situation.
But, no, it wasn't directed at you.
eta: It is pretty mind-boggling to think that there have been a quarter of a million births already
today.
Meh, you dont want her wearing it....but I would be happy to oblige.....
now i thought you'd already written me off because you know "my type"? are you saying i've got a shot?
may all those looking to get in a family way achieve success. or at least have fun trying. :knockdup:
I was trying to stay with the premise of the thread, and all this talk of babies made me think of the population situation.
But, no, it wasn't directed at you.
eta: It is pretty mind-boggling to think that there have been a quarter of a million births already today.
No worries. I was just wondering. I've thought of the same thing myself to be honest, but I guess what I look at is that we can financially afford this child. We're planning for it and with a little bit of luck, we'll get there some time soon.
How many of those quarter of a million births do you think are being born under the same premise?
Thanks lookout. That's really nice of you to say.
well, if you subtract the "we live in the middle of a freakin desert and only have a few scraps of clothing and flies to play with, what else do we have to do?" types, the "c'mon babe, you know i love you, and besides my parents won't be home for like an hour" kids, and the "heeyyouoo. itshhh 3 aclockk and yer hchhot! wannaa gto my plasshh?" adventurers.... wait, what was the question?
now i thought you'd already written me off because you know "my type"? are you saying i've got a shot?
Ohhh...I'm busy putting the fire out on that burning bridge!!!!
Oh and if you friggen women listened to me.....VITEX AGNUS!!!! get it
I don't think not getting drunk often enough is my problem. lol
Broken kitchen light fixture.
Well broken stuff in general, but that's the one I want to fix first. That's not true, either. The light's the next thing I'll work on.
update:
Light works. New ballast ($30!!!), some 'lectric tape, good to go.
None of my clothes fit and I can't afford t buy new ones. The electricity people phoned me up last night to hassle me about what I owe them. How many times can you fit the sentence "no...look I can't pay anything tonight...no I can't pay £100 now...I haven't got any money, I can't pay anything straight away" into a single telephone conversation?
I am broke. On low income until next student check at end of January.
My house is a total dump and I can't seem to find the get-up-and-go to sort it out. I have three essays due in less than a month and can't seem to concentrate on the research. I am smoking too much. Everything is too much effort. All I want to do is sleep.
Oh fuck Dana, thats not good.
Thrift shop clothes? I love them for size changes, when you know you will be able to fit into your normal clothes again.
You need to do something fun.....can you go away for a cheap weekend? Let Sundae paint your nails or something
*chuckles* I wish! But unfortunately not possible at the moment:P
The thrift shop idea I might try though. I have a hatred of charity shops (dragged round too many by mum when I was younger) but I think I'll bite the bullet and try.
I'll be ok. I always am. Just pissing me off a little today.
*smiles*
Well, I vote you get at least one of your essays done this weekend, and I guarantee you (having been a mature age student myself) that you'll feel much better come monday. In fact, if you do it by Sunday lunch, you might even be able to talk yourself into taking yourself to the pub for a beer on sunday arvo to celebrate. ;)
*chuckles* good advice Ali...unfortunately I have a conference to attend on Saturday and the Legion's annual general meeting in the morning with a leaflet drop in the afternoon on Sunday.
Takes about three or four days of reading and probably a few hours in special collections examining primary sources to put an essay together (if it's gonna get decent marks anyway).
I'll spend some of today on the reading. Try and get some done in the evening as well. I am in uni tomorrow anyway so that might be a good time to go visit Specials Colls.
Have to know what the current and past scholarship is of the topic at hand to avoid accidental plagiarism. If you don't know what the main writers in any one field are saying you can come up with similar ideas and end up in trouble. Only way to avoid it is to know who's said the things you want to say and footnote them. Knowing where their analysis leaves off or where the gaps are allows you to make your own independant argument, spinning off from theirs.
basically I have to know what fifteen or twenty historians have said about each of the topics I am writing on.
But hey....maybe if I log off here and go do some fecking reading tht might help huh?:P
DanaC's words on how essays are done in the UK has me worried. In my undergrad education an essay was just bullshit with references. I think I'm fucked. . .
*laughs* depends on the subject. History is one of those subjects you *read*. Very little time spent in classes or lectures, mostly you get given a long list of books and authors, with some helpful pointers as to which are most relevant to which part of the module. They may even include the odd chapter reference (e.g such and such a book, esp. chapters 3 and 7). The idea is that you use that list as a starting point and branch off from there into your own independantly sourced material.
The amount of self directed study you are expected to do varies from university to university and faculty to faculty.
What are you planning to do your MA on? You really cannot do an MA without knowing current scholarship, else how can you ensure you are producing original material?
In terms of the undergraduate experience, the awareness of plagiarism has become very acute in recent years and systems have been set up in many unis to combat it. You could probably have got away with more flannel and less actual reading when your work wasn't going to be electronically scaned and compared to pretty much every known article available on the web in your field:P
Incidentally, how you finding the Geordie-speak?
I often find logging off the MB and doing some reading is helpful IF I HAVE A LOT OF FUCKING READING TO DO! lol kidding. ;)
I'm sure you'll get it all done and you'll do a great job Dana. Don't stress out though. That's not going to help get them done any sooner...although research suggests that all students have a certain stress point that they must reach before they'll actually start their assignments.
Mine personally was very low. I used to do mine as soon as I got them because I couldn't stand knowing I had work to do that I hadn't done. On the other hand, my cousin who is a mature age student with a part time job and three kids, always leaves hers till the last minute (sometimes litterally). I don't know how she does it.
What are you planning to do your MA on? You really cannot do an MA without knowing current scholarship, else how can you ensure you are producing original material?
I'm doing a Taught MSc in E-Business and Information Systems. It's consists mostly of businessy fluff, thus tons of content-less reading. The business modules are where the essays are assigned.
I have a lot of reading to do to catch up with where I need to be. But I'm cranking through it, even though most of it is "no shit, really?" stuff, especially in E-Business. There's a higher percentage of good stuff in the Understanding Organizations module.
Incidentally, how you finding the Geordie-speak?
If they're speaking full-on Geordie, I'm lost. Even when they try to speak more standard English, I have trouble.
My coworker just found an email from February (printed and left in an unsecured location) from the self-righteous, paranoid, bad joke telling, know-it-all bigot of an attorney I work for, to the firm's sole proprietor and lead attorney, detailing how I'm rude, incompetent, unmotivated, and act like a 'princess'.
Tell em' to suck your pussy.
ok, i'll choose door number 2.
My coworker just found an email from February (printed and left in an unsecured location) from the self-righteous, paranoid, bad joke telling, know-it-all bigot of an attorney I work for, to the firm's sole proprietor and lead attorney, detailing how I'm rude, incompetent, unmotivated, and act like a 'princess'.
:D
Apparently you haven't been
rude enough. Here is what you do: edit it of the apparent mistakes and fax it to his office from kinko's. At night...so you won't actually be out of the office while it is being sent. Who's to say it was you?
Maybe you can be the one to pick it up and act surprised? Tell him you have received a fax that you need to discuss?
*ucker.
I hate my boss
I hate my boss
I hate my bosssssss!!!!
I've finally employed the ignore feature but it doesn't block threads just posts... so it is kinda pointless as a sifting tool. Does anyone have what they consider a good method of sorting/reading the content here, when time is precious?
If I just want to look up stuff I've been involved in, I just look up my own posts and see who's responded.
Today I feel upset because I have a nasty nasty cold and I haven't had a good sleep in two nights now, so I'm very grumpy.
Oh, and if I'm one of the ones Griff has on ignore, can someone please tell him what I said? ;)
this guy was driving and on his cell phone when he didn’t see me and hit me. I saw him last second because he was speeding while turning the corner. He crashes into me and my bike flys with me falling off. He gets out looks at me and he watches his car for scratches. I was in so much pain, and he’s worried about his car. My hand had punched into his side glass and broke through, my hand bled a lot. Then he’s like fuck you and gets in and drives away. I was in so much pain that I actually had a hard time getting up to read his license plate to try and memorize it. Turns out when he crashed into me the handle bar went into my lungs. Not fully through but bruised it bad enough so I had a hard time breathing. Hit and run I wont forget it.
what an arsehole. Glad to see you're still alive though. Did you report it to the police anyway?
I've finally employed the ignore feature but it doesn't block threads just posts... so it is kinda pointless as a sifting tool. Does anyone have what they consider a good method of sorting/reading the content here, when time is precious?
Give the ignore time to grow on you. You'll adapt to the extra spaces it inserts.
Do not make my mistake and let curiosity get the better of you and lift the curtain.
It's not worth it.
If I just want to look up stuff I've been involved in, I just look up my own posts and see who's responded.
Today I feel upset because I have a nasty nasty cold and I haven't had a good sleep in two nights now, so I'm very grumpy.
:sniff:
Drag! Sorry. Hope you get better soon. Sleeping at night? Ambien is my new best friend.:3_eyes:
aww ya me too, hope ya feel better
:sniff:
Drag! Sorry. Hope you get better soon. Sleeping at night? Ambien is my new best friend.:3_eyes:
I took drugs to help me sleep last night, but it's more that I keep choking and waking up. :( You know when you can't breath through your nose so you sleep with your mouth open and then your tongue falls back or your throat fills wth saliva or something and you wake up gasping for breath...
Also, because husband had to go to work today and has some really important meetings on, I felt guilty about keeping him awake with my tossing and coughing etc, so I quasi-slept on the couch for a few hours. That didn't help too much either.
I'm pretty sure I'm going to live though, so that's the good part. ;)
I felt guilty about keeping him awake with my tossing and coughing etc, so I quasi-slept on the couch for a few hours. That didn't help too much either.
I do the same thing, when I'm sick or restless. Rather than wake other people up, I get up and either sleep on the couch or find a quiet place to read until dawn. I agree it doesn't really do anything for your own health, though. :neutral:
Hope you feel better soon!
this guy was driving and on his cell phone when he didn’t see me and hit me. I saw him last second because he was speeding while turning the corner. He crashes into me and my bike flys with me falling off. He gets out looks at me and he watches his car for scratches. I was in so much pain, and he’s worried about his car. My hand had punched into his side glass and broke through, my hand bled a lot. Then he’s like fuck you and gets in and drives away. I was in so much pain that I actually had a hard time getting up to read his license plate to try and memorize it. Turns out when he crashed into me the handle bar went into my lungs. Not fully through but bruised it bad enough so I had a hard time breathing. Hit and run I wont forget it.
I hope you
(a) took your ass to hospital
(b) called the police.
Oh, and if I'm one of the ones Griff has on ignore, can someone please tell him what I said? ;)
I would, but I think I am on his list too
I would, but I think I am on his list too
If that's the case, he's going to miss some good pictures in that other thread.
Oh, and if I'm one of the ones Griff has on ignore, can someone please tell him what I said? ;)
What? ;) No, you and ducks don't make me pull my hair out regretting lost minutes of life.
Hit and run I wont forget it.
Not that I have misplaced priorities, but um... how's the bike?
This whole frakkin' board!
Well that's good to know Griff. I'd give a whoop of celebration except I'm vocally challenged today (which is bothering me). ;)
This whole frakkin' board!
Wah Draxxie?
Well, some ya'll's ok, and I don't want to be an asshole, but sometimes ya'll push me to my limits.
You just take yourself n shit too seriously.
Lighten up and have fun.
Oh, btw, I prefer you as Drax too.
This is a very petty rant but I need to vent:
Pissing me off today is: one crazy school director.
I work at five different schools over the course of my week. Four are fine, but one school is just painful.
It's out in the boondocks so there is less oversight from head office. The school director seems to have no idea what lessons are like or how teaching works, or what company procedures are.
Thursdays usually start with a painfully slow double lesson with a student who the director promoted to a level well above her ability to get her to sign up. She did this by twisting the rules to allow the student to take a test she shouldn't have taken, then when the student dismally failed the test, letting her take a different (irrelevant) test four times in a week until she "passed".
However when I walked in today I saw on the schedule that I was also supposed to teach a trial lesson for a 5 year old kid who wanted to join. They're supposed to tell me in advance, so I had no prep time and didn't know what I was expected to do. Fortunately I managed to get the other teacher to cover for my first lesson (Thanks S!) and threw together a lesson plan, but then I noticed the director had double booked my lesson and the other teacher's kids' lesson in the same (only) kids' room. WTF? We figured that the other teacher could move his class out 15 mins early to play board games and we'd scrape through. We phoned the director (out of the office today) to confirm this was okay ... and she changed the plan ... telling me I was actually supposed to do a special placement test of which I had never heard, let alone been trained for.
I called head office and had a trainer pulled out of a meeting (bad in Japan!) to explain the deal to me. And so I muddled through and fortunately the kid is really sweet and nice, although not great level at English. (Imagine my day if she'd thrown a fruity!)
Meanwhile the director has taken on a different kid (both are "refugees" from NOVA, the biggest language school chain in Japan which recently collapsed with $400 million in debts and 300,000 students) who also won't fit into any existing classes, and so has been told to come whenever she has time and whichever teacher is available will put together a lesson for her!!
This is borderline insane. Kids' classes require semester-long planning and continuity, and considerable daily preparation. This kid will be flitting from teacher to teacher, different standards and techniques and topics all over the place, and it will drive the teachers nuts, turning up to work to learn they have to pull a kid's lesson out of their ear.
Dumb-ass bitch. And to cap it off, like many Japanese staff who deal with foreigners, she has taken an "English" nickname to make it "easy" for us (which actually makes it harder because everyone else uses the Japanese name so we have to learn two names. That I might forgive, but who the hell would deliberately name themselves after a Disney character? Idiot.
Ok I feel better now.
the break in my work that has allowed me to play in the cellar so much for a week has come to an end. :sniff:
say, has anybody been watching the markets?;)
say, has anybody been watching the markets?;)
Whoo hoo! I love it when I lose more money in my 401K in a week than I make in almost two months of working. It makes me feel so warm and fuzzy inside.
Not.
Whoo hoo! I love it when I lose more money in my 401K in a week than I make in almost two months of working. It makes me feel so warm and fuzzy inside.
Not.
Thanks to the miracle of dollar cost averaging, you're not losing money, glatt. It's a *SALE*. You should double down your withholding today.
quick thoughts for you G:
The fact that you have enough invested that it can take that type of dive... :thumb2:
The fact that you aren't retiring in the next 5 years, means that a downturn is actually good for your portfolio if handled correctly. be defensive against a falling US economy, but don't get out of the market. going to cash rarely works in the long run. you might want to look at big american companies. all sizes of foreign companies. unless you've got the skill or big brass ones, avoid sector bets. look at areas that are being hit hard and decide if you think those companies are solid enough to survive and rebound after a recession ends. buy low sell high. and remember, the best returns are always in the two year period following a recession.
...and remember, the best returns are always in the two year period following a recession.
Are we officially in a recession (outside of Detroit, of course)?
Are we officially in a recession (outside of Detroit, of course)?
I think ... not ..........yet.
Big housing slowdowns almost always end in recessions. Oil prices going through the roof often leads to recession. I'm betting on it.
Meanwhile, I've watched the value of the yen drop by about 20% in the last year, taking my salary and savings with it. :(
Your recession might be the thing that triggers a turnaround. I'll send you a food package if it does.
I think ... not ..........yet.
Big housing slowdowns almost always end in recessions. Oil prices going through the roof often leads to recession. I'm betting on it.
Meanwhile, I've watched the value of the yen drop by about 20% in the last year, taking my salary and savings with it. :(
Your recession might be the thing that triggers a turnaround. I'll send you a food package if it does.
How long does raw fish stay fresh?
quick thoughts for you G:
The fact that you have enough invested that it can take that type of dive... :thumb2:
The fact that you aren't retiring in the next 5 years, means that a downturn is actually good for your portfolio if handled correctly. be defensive against a falling US economy, but don't get out of the market. going to cash rarely works in the long run. you might want to look at big american companies. all sizes of foreign companies. unless you've got the skill or big brass ones, avoid sector bets. look at areas that are being hit hard and decide if you think those companies are solid enough to survive and rebound after a recession ends. buy low sell high. and remember, the best returns are always in the two year period following a recession.
Thanks for the tips. Now is a good time to take a look at my allocations. Haven't looked at them in a year or two. Retirement is a long way off, so I'm not actually upset, but you nobody likes to see their balance go down.
Are we officially in a recession (outside of Detroit, of course)?
impossible to tell. the definition of recession is two successive quarters of a shrinking economy, so you never know until you are at least 6 months in. our last recession only lasted 8 months, so technically, we were only aware of it for 2 months. or something like that. i still get people asking when the recession will end. they look shocked when i tell them that it ended 5.5 years ago.
glatt: if you choose to be a DIY guy there is a book i would suggest by a nationally famous planner. i don't agree with everything, but for a DIYer it is good. can't give you the name, but if you google "buckets of money" you'll find him.
****i have no connection whatsoever with him or his books****
the break in my work that has allowed me to play in the cellar so much for a week has come to an end. :sniff:
NooooooOooOOOOo...say it isnt so.
So, lookout, if you reached in your pocket and realized that, in addition to a few spare condoms and some pocket lint, you have a spare $50,000, where would you put it?
So, lookout, if you reached in your pocket and realized that, in addition to a few spare condoms and some pocket lint, you have a spare $50,000, where would you put it?
In the post. To me. Thank you.
I'm upset because this is the first significant time I've had internet access for a couple of days and I'm
TIRED. Bed-time for me before I fall asleep on the keyboard. AND I have 6 new library books to read as well!
Night night chickens x
How long does raw fish stay fresh?
Does this mean we are having sushi for lunch?
Does this mean we are having sushi for lunch?
I don't think we want to wait for ZenGum's care package. But there is a sushi restaurant near my office - just across the parking lot from the hotel.
I don't think we want to wait for ZenGum's care package. But there is a sushi restaurant near my office - just across the parking lot from the hotel.
As long as it is a classy hotel.:blush:
If it is just $50K that i really don't need for a few years i would split it down the middle with half into a couple international funds and the other half into a couple of carefully researched companies that have had he crap kicked out of them the last 12 months... say some financials. but i'd be very very careful about trying to catch that falling knife.
It's dreary and cold, my throat's sore, I'm tense and cranky from too much caffeine, and some machinery outside my window is rattling and giving me a huge headache.
When does happy hour start on Saturday?
If I just want to look up stuff I've been involved in, I just look up my own posts and see who's responded.
Today I feel upset because I have a nasty nasty cold and I haven't had a good sleep in two nights now, so I'm very grumpy.
Time for Nyquil
almost better now mate. :) I can even breath through my nose!
eek!
WOW...I know all the words to that song. Wonder what happened to Mr Astley
he's making a comeback isn't he?
probably. ;) I made up that bit about him dying for dramatic effect. Looks like I only managed consternation here...
I ashamedly admit that I remember that song too. :thepain:
I was young, stupid, teenaged, and had not yet learned to recognize a talentless prettyboy carried entirely by the studio techies.
If he's not dead, I think he should have become Jason Donovan's soul(-less) mate.
Foxsoccerchannel...not...playing...arsenal matches. their tied for first with manchester united and FSC is playing a freaking FA Cup match between what i believe are two league one sides. are you freaking kidding me???
but, aha! just found out that they are on setanta and i know of a restaurant, ok - bar with a kitchen that has setanta. off i go. i can take my work with me and call it a working lunch.
***just received my email notifying me of my bill from the saturday night. I went to a silent auction for a charity group. ouch. i'm not sure whether to post this in the happy or upsetting thread.****
Foxsoccerchannel...not...playing...arsenal matches. their tied for first with manchester united and FSC is playing a freaking FA Cup match between what i believe are two league one sides. are you freaking kidding me???
The FA Cup is hugely important here though. And a wonderful opportunity for first division fans to see their team play live rather than just the usual suspects in the premier.
but, aha! just found out that they are on setanta and i know of a restaurant, ok - bar with a kitchen that has setanta. off i go. i can take my work with me and call it a working lunch.
We get Setanta as part of our Virgin package. It makes HM very happy. He's a Liverpool fan. See you're holding your own against Reading anyway...
***just received my email notifying me of my bill from the saturday night. I went to a silent auction for a charity group. ouch. i'm not sure whether to post this in the happy or upsetting thread.****
What joo win? Anything cool?
Don't misunderstand - I'm a fan of the FA cup. I actually care more about that than the Champions League (ya i know, backwards) but to have to lower league teams televised in the US instead of this game? BTW, did i mention that this is just one of the multiple replays of this FA Cup game? I'm happy that these players get the opportunity to be televised, but... but... not in place of a live Gunners game.
I won a couple different weekend getaways and a champagne brunch. Didn't get the Wii.
BigV
is inconsequentia l. and the word is spelled with an "L" at the end followed by a full stop.
My facebook entry. Notice the word inconsequential. Notice that the end of the word is displayed: "inconsequentia l." It is not a typo. I deliberately typed it CORRECTLY, yet the system stubbornly refuses to display it like this:
inconsequential.
Maddening.
I have a pain at the top of my right thigh. It's on the outside of the thigh, the part that continues round from the butt.
It started last week and I thought I'd burned myself sitting too close to the outside heater when we sat in the yard with HM's brother (a smoker).
It was an occasional sharp pain but the most significant characteristic was the burning sensation of my skin when I lay in bed.
This evening it has been worse rather than better. It is sharp enough to make me cry out when I move, and I can feel (albeit less intensely) as I am sitting here on the edge of the bed. It is seriously painful and feels like whenever I use the muscle it is ripping or tearing. Any use is painful, even if unrelated, like sneezing or earlier when I was on the loo.
And yet bizzarely it hasn't hurt once during exercise and tonight it is at its worst when I am having a rest day.
It's scaring me a little. I am thinking of going to the doctors about it.
I'm confused--is it both muscular, and on the surface of your skin?
Until tonight I thought it was skin deep.
Tonight the sharp pains are definitely muscular, but still feel close to the surface if that makes any sense.
Even now, lying on the bed with the laptop propped up against my bended knees I can feel it, and it feels like a burn. When I move it will really twinge and make me swear. I keep cecking the skin execting to see shiny scar tissue, which I have cracked by moving and is now weeping. But it looks totally normal. It must be underneath.
Sorry, I'm confused about it myself so I'm probably not making any sense.
go to the doc sg. If it's that painful you should have it seen to.
Until tonight I thought it was skin deep.
Tonight the sharp pains are definitely muscular, but still feel close to the surface if that makes any sense.
Even now, lying on the bed with the laptop propped up against my bended knees I can feel it, and it feels like a burn. When I move it will really twinge and make me swear. I keep cecking the skin execting to see shiny scar tissue, which I have cracked by moving and is now weeping. But it looks totally normal. It must be underneath.
Sorry, I'm confused about it myself so I'm probably not making any sense.
Need a massage?
go to the doc sg. If it's that painful you should have it seen to.
It's been a nuisance rather than a bad pain up until now. I'll see how it feels tomorrow, if it hurts this much I am definitely going. I'm hoping tonight is its swan song though.
Need a massage?
Actually I need a painkiller. Just taken one - I can't believe didn't think of that until I was framing a reply to your post! The Cellar is so useful :)
SG, could it be a pinched nerve, or maybe a muscle spasm?
ok, I was going to post this before but decided against it at the time, but I've decided to go ahead and post it anyway.
I don't know if this happens to other chicks, but at certain times during my monthly cycle, I've noticed that the nerves around my upper thighs and groin area seem to become what I'd describe as hyper sensitive to the point where I need to be a bit gentle about how I move etc because it kind of hurts and even though it's the nerves that're causing it, it sometimes feels like it's deeper than the surface. Normally this is about a week before I'm due.
I had a doctor tell me once, a long time ago, that pains like that were due to a mild vitamin C deficiency (basically you have a greater need for it than normal at that time.) But I never could tell a big difference between when I took the vitamins and when I didn't, so maybe she was full of crap.
Hmmm...I'm glad it's not just me then.
I'll try taking vitamin C next time it happens and see what happens. It doesn't happen every time, so I guess it kind of makes sense that it could be a deficiency.
I had a doctor tell me once, a long time ago, that pains like that were due to a mild vitamin C deficiency (basically you have a greater need for it than normal at that time.) But I never could tell a big difference between when I took the vitamins and when I didn't, so maybe she was full of crap.
Are you saying that she needed a laxative?
Choclatl - reading up on it, it does sound like a pinched nerve.
Damn, I don't want to rest it!
Maybe I will go to the docs and get the diagnoses confirmed - better than not going to the gym on a whim.
Fucking Everything. areshole bastard gits. And why does nobody stop me from taking so much on? why does nobody else step up? grumfuckingumble.
I know how you feel monster. You kow you'll feel better about it tomorrow though right?
mebbe
might take a few more days -still got to deal with the backlash of what didn't get done today. :rolleyes:
When I woke up this morning the pain was all but gone and I felt silly about being so worried last night. However when I bent to pick up a towel after my bath it gave an almighty twang and I realised it was best to get it checked out.
So I'm not going to the gym today (booooo!) and have an appointment for 09.10 tomorrow.
As soon as I've finished this cup of tea (and taken the beans and lentils off simmer) I'll go and do my fortnightly shop. Which I hope will cheer me up - very down today and finding it hard to get going.
*hugs SG* up days and down days honey, they come and more importantly they go.
I recommend soaking in a warm bath this evening to ease the pain btw. Preferably having taken an ibuprofen twenty mins prior :P
I have the next meeting (battle) tomorrow evening. Which means this afternoon is going to be filled with phone calls and stress atthe thought of any of my people suddenly dropping out or getting ill. Rang D last night to run a couple of ideas past him and he was (yes, you guessed it) on his sofa, under a duvet groggy as fuck with a nasty sounding cold. 'Bout ten mins before I phoned him I was thinking "Shit, my throat feels tickly, and that was about my twentieth sneeze of the evening, I just did...."
Woke up this moning to discover some bastard's been sandpapering my throat whilst i was alseep. Whoever it was kindly deposited a drill at the back of my right eye and I think it's slipped down into my sinuses now.
Cannot (and I really can't emphasise the imperative enough here) be fucking ill this week! Nor can D, come to that. How many others of my lot are currently sinking into miserable colds, at this very moment? *mutters to self and shuffles off to dose up on caffeine*
Ah, but Dana, how many of the other lot are also sinking into a miserable cold?
Chicken soup and sleep where you can.
If Ripley/Dana doesn't stop this bully guy ... who will?
Tuesday can be Monday when Monday is a holiday.
My computer was blank this morning. IT came and looked at it and took it to the IT hospital.
I can't get into terminal server to do anything on this computer.
Student worker: "Um, this student said they filled out their MPN at the beginning of the semester and someone told her that her check would be here this week and we just got her MPN on the 6th but they turned in everything...." (fade to my brain voice saying "I turned everything in in 1987 why isn't it processed" and my other brain voice arguing that they always say it was a hundred years ago when often it was yesterday) and I had to tell her to take a number and our loan person would have to look into it because I can't do a damn thing on this computer!
Argh.
Thank you. You may now return to your regularly scheduled programming.
[/work rant]
oh, and I've had a "sick" headache for three days and I'm not getting over this illness and I'm starting to suspect SARS or e-coli or bubonic plague and I wish I'd just get sick as hell and get it over with because my life sucks anyway (now I better go find something that's making me happy and post it in the other thread...hmmm, what's going good right now? Money? No. Relationship? No. Work? No. My efforts at a positive attitude? No. Coffee's good though. I like coffee!) :lol:
bad day today.
:(
Maritally?
City, someone is cutting 6 hugh oak trees across street from me. Will let early am sun on my house.
I hate to see nice trees cut down. After I moved out of my apartment in the sky they tore out the huge old Maple that had been sitting in front of the front window. I loved that tree for a few reasons: there was a hole I could watch birds nesting in, it was pretty, my cat watched it like it was a movie.
Why are they cutting the oaks?
...
Why are they cutting the oaks?
'cause they don't want to know how high it can grow.
'cause they don't want to know how high it can grow.
Oh, wait. That's a sycamore..... never mind.
Sweat running down my arse crack
Why are they cutting the oaks?
Well it looks like to me, that some folks with pull needs fire wood. The City has about a 12 man crew cutting and loading for someone??? And no, I can't get shit.
Maritally?
And this is your business because........?
Signed BigV and Tink
And this is your business because........?
Signed BigV and Tink
Sorry, I tend to think thats a tad harsh.
V has posted about his issues previously and when posting in this thread, you kinda expect someone to enquire regarding the motive of the post.
Especially when many of been quite concerned about what V has been dealing with.
:2cents: No offense meant
Damnit. I just found a small puddle in the basement under our first floor toilet. Went back upstairs to flush the toilet and see what happens. Puddle is a bit bigger now.
I have enough damn projects going on in this house. I don't feel like pulling a damn toilet to replace a wax ring. What a stupid system for connecting a plumbing fixture to a sewer pipe. What moron came up with this standard? "Hey, I've got an idea, lets rely solely on bees wax to keep the water from leaking out of the pipes when we flush." Ugh.
I have a dentist appointment in half an hour. I would say it'll be the first of a series of appointments costing me an arm and a leg. Expect me to bitch about it some more when I get back (if I'm not in too much pain to type).
I HATE GOING TO THE DENTIST!
Damnit. I just found a small puddle in the basement under our first floor toilet. Went back upstairs to flush the toilet and see what happens. Puddle is a bit bigger now.
I have enough damn projects going on in this house. I don't feel like pulling a damn toilet to replace a wax ring. What a stupid system for connecting a plumbing fixture to a sewer pipe. What moron came up with this standard? "Hey, I've got an idea, lets rely solely on bees wax to keep the water from leaking out of the pipes when we flush." Ugh.
It is stupid but thankfully it's an easy fix... normally.
True. It is an easy fix. Maybe I'll even do it tomorrow night so I don't ruin part of the weekend doing it. I'd just prefer to be crossing things off the list than adding to it.
Sorry, I tend to think thats a tad harsh.
V has posted about his issues previously and when posting in this thread, you kinda expect someone to enquire regarding the motive of the post.
Especially when many of been quite concerned about what V has been dealing with.
:2cents: No offense meant
None taken.
What about WORK related issues? What about looming deadlines? What about deliveries you expected not coming on time which delays your progress?
Yet the first jump was to marital issues? He has posted much here about OUR lives and 1-sided posts and PMs. I have a side too as to why papers were filed in the first place. No one is a saint, including V. What about what I had to deal with, even though you did not know me? It was a two way street on who could best hurt the other. Trust me. WRONG, and thank God we discovered that. We have no secrets, thus both our names on the last post. I respect him enough to talk to him about my responses such as this. In fact, he is here with me now.
Tink, I think most of us here want to support you both as much as we can. Especially now that we get to talk to both of you.
The journey you two have been on has been a rough one, and we've all sort of been there too, albeit from a distance. We care what happens to your marriage, and I'm sure you must see that there are many cases were cellar members have posted that there is always two sides to every story, so yeah, we've all tried to be supportive of V because he's the one we've known up till you joined - which is a great thing in my opinion, but I don't think anyone has advocated simply walking away. We've all encouraged him to look into his heart and see what he wants, then work towards it. I'd say that's what he's done isn't it? In the end. It's what you've both done, and we're all very happy that you've come back to each other.
Anyway, maybe Spex jumped the gun a bit with his comment, but I'm pretty sure he was just trying to show concern for someone he views as a friend. I seriously doubt that he meant it as a bad reflection on you in any way.
None taken.
What about WORK related issues? What about looming deadlines? What about deliveries you expected not coming on time which delays your progress?
Yet the first jump was to marital issues? He has posted much here about OUR lives and 1-sided posts and PMs. I have a side too as to why papers were filed in the first place. No one is a saint, including V. What about what I had to deal with, even though you did not know me? It was a two way street on who could best hurt the other. Trust me. WRONG, and thank God we discovered that. We have no secrets, thus both our names on the last post. I respect him enough to talk to him about my responses such as this. In fact, he is here with me now.
I see your point, but my initial thought was "marriage hick up?", just because of recent history.
No insinuating about right or wrong on either side, just that I thought the response a bit OTT to pexx's reply.
I totally understand the two sides thing, having just been through it with my in-laws, well, now ex in-laws and the things they were hearing from their son and nothing from me.
I was sincerely glad when V and yourself pulled together instead of a part :)
We've all encouraged him to look into his heart and see what he wants, then work towards it. I'd say that's what he's done isn't it? In the end. It's what you've both done, and we're all very happy that you've come back to each other.
Anyway, maybe Spex jumped the gun a bit with his comment, but I'm pretty sure he was just trying to show concern for someone he views as a friend. I seriously doubt that he meant it as a bad reflection on you in any way.
Thanks! We did. I hope this puts to rest any more concerns that V's friends have. I am not out to get him, as some pms have attested to, although I completely understand concerns since I was not "here". I too am proceeding with caution as others have attempted to take my place as "chief wench" in this forum. That being said, I hope to not come across as the total bitch....just someone who loves my husband completely and, unfortunately, it took a horrible few months for both of us to realize the depth of our feelings. I do thank you for your support of him and hope that people learn to trust me as well.
He is under a lot of pressure at work to complete a large task. I look forward to the new gray hair it gives him. Very sexy looking!;)
Well I'm sure it'll be that much easier for him to complete knowing he has you to come home to. :)
Hope so. Hard to be the main IT guy with everyone wanting a piece of you at the same time. That's what happens when you know what you're doing. Good problem, to have in a way.
For sure. Maybe he should try and fuck up at work more, then you'd have him at home more. ;)
For sure. Maybe he should try and fuck up at work more, then you'd have him at home more. ;)
Ah....no.
I apologize for being interested and concerned, Tink and Big V.
I went to the doctor and it is just a muscle spasm which was affecting the nerves locally. I don't have to rest any more, so am going back to the gym tomorrow. This makes me happy actually, but is the conclusion to the other posts so it makes more sense here.
Couldn't sleep last night - one of the bad ones laying awake and worrying with anxious dreams starring an array of ex lover who I had promised something to and family who I had let down. Got some sleeping tablets from the docs - I'm going to drug myself back into a proper schedule rather than force myself back into it like last time. I would help if HM kept the same schedule but I like the kitchen to myself in the mornings so it's not lose-lose.
Also, on days like this I can barely face eating. Off back to bed with a cup of de-caff tea, and apple and a handful of ham (the latter for the boys). Healthy eating and exercise resumes tomorrow.
Glad to hear that pain in your leg wasn't anything serious, SG. Is the pain pretty much gone, now?
I too initally thought "Yikes, hope it's not a marital issue". Probably most of us did. I won't beat this any more, but suffice it to say instead of jumping down our throats, a simple "Thankfully, no, work related instead" would have sufficed. If you post here, expect people to be interested and curious about what you have to say. No one here is out to get you, that I know of.
Tink, I think most of us here want to support you both as much as we can. Especially now that we get to talk to both of you. The journey you two have been on has been a rough one, and we've all sort of been there too, albeit from a distance. ....
I have a side too as to why papers were filed in the first place. No one is a saint, including V. What about what I had to deal with, even though you did not know me? It was a two way street on who could best hurt the other. . . . We have no secrets, thus both our names on the last post.
Bolding mine. If that is the case then once things have settled down, I at least, would like to request that you guys share with the rest of us what you have learned from this whole experience in the relationships forum. I for one would like to learn from your mistakes, and hopefully prevent the same thing happening to Red and I.
I too am proceeding with caution as others have attempted to take my place as "chief wench" in this forum. I do thank you for your support of him and hope that people learn to trust me as well.
I don't understand what you mean here, by "chief wench". Could you clarify this?
Trust is a 2 way street. You need to trust
us as well. No one is trying to steal V away from you. (again, that
I know of :))
Most of us are rational adults, who have made plenty of mistakes in our own lives and tend to give others
including you the benefit of the doubt until proven otherwise. We value honesty, and accept nothing but, and that is why this is the best freaking forum on the net.
instead of jumping down our throats, a simple "Thankfully, no, work related instead" would have sufficed. If you post here, .....
Lessons: Do not hit. I've had the bruises. Don't scream within an inch of the other's face. Trust me in this one.....the one being screamed at's ear drums rattle. Don't block the other in an attempt to be intimidating. Don't get into "he said/she said".
I don't understand what you mean here, by "chief wench". Could you clarify this? ....Trust is a 2 way street. You need to trust us as well. No one is trying to steal V away from you. (again, that I know of :))
In the line of full disclosure, the Cellar-ite knows who she is. She who likes to show pics of herself to someone elses husband and get him all rattled when he is in an extreme emotional state. The train worked two ways there and it was shear betrayal.
You need to trust us as well. .....Most of us are rational adults, who have made plenty of mistakes in our own lives and tend to give others including you the benefit of the doubt until proven otherwise.
Unfortunately, that didn't happen during the tumultuous period. I was tried, convicted and hung.
I see that this is a different group of people when you "enter the fray" so to speak that can be quite welcoming. I no longer have anything to say on the subject as I know this upsets V and THAT I do not want to do. This thread should get back to the more important role of supporting those like Sundae Girl.
Unfortunately, that didn't happen during the tumultuous period. I was tried, convicted and hung.
I can honestly say, Tink, that I never ascribed blame to either you or BigV when he was posting abouthis troubles. I had sympathy for, and was worried about, BigV as he was a Dwellar going through some very difficult times, but in general I didn't get the impression that it was all made out to be your fault.
Perhaps it was different in PMs, but I didn't get into PMing over it so was only privy to what went into the general Cellar boards.
Egads, I think I'm getting sick again. I'm actually getting work done and able to be here too.
Thanks for your response Tink. I can't know what goes on behind the main board. As someone who sent PM's to BigV checking on him periodically, I am saddened to read that someone here would take advantage of him. From my time here, that is not typical Dwellar behavior.
I can only know what is shared by anyone on the open board, and always keep a filled saltshaker next to the mouse. I had personally had no opinion of you really, either way. I was/am glad to hear things worked out finally in the end and am always happy to see another poster joining the party.
Moving on now.
No wonder LJ has a partner...
Holy crap...what's all this chief wench stuff? Who is "she" rattleing people's husbands?
Can I get a quote for the person who even said that?
Let it lieth all ye sensitive cellarites, so saeth the Lookout.
No, I am actually amused...lost my smilie..here it is...
:D
In fact, lol!!!
Hey lookout....where is your photo? Am I just not seeing it anywhere?
my photo? haven't posted one in a really really long time. i am in the RFN thread though. and some from my trip to the med. probably some others.
here's an old one though. me and lil lookout.
hmmm, can't get it to stick. i'll try later.
Glad to hear that pain in your leg wasn't anything serious, SG. Is the pain pretty much gone, now?
It's been improving since that one horrible night. I didn't feel it at all in the doctor's - of course - but I have it low grade right now. Nothing like what it was, easy to handle.
Let it lieth all ye sensitive cellarites, so saeth the Lookout.
Sorry, I gotsta know, I gotsta know.
Holy crap...what's all this chief wench stuff? Who is "she" rattleing people's husbands?
Can I get a quote for the person who even said that?
It sounds like Tink is trying to be PC and not identify "she". I applaud her for that. Frankly, she (Tink) made it known that she knows of some indiscretions that took place between this other Cellar female and her husband. I'd be upset too.
Sundae Girl,
Glad to hear things are ok with your leg. Let us know if working out helps. That would be good news for the rest of us too if we experience anything of the sort.
Hmmm.. well, I'm not going to make fun of someone I don't know and who obviously feels betrayed as she states. If in fact that was a poke at her, which I hope it wasn't.
There seem to be some really great people here. That is a major issue that was dangled in her face and it seems that neither her husband nor this other person cared less about what effect it might have on her. Oh well, on to other threads.
I'm Chief Wench.
Prove it. Show us the nekid pictures. :stickpoke :ggw:
Well I expect there are a number of us who tried to be supportive to V who are now worried we might be in the running for Chief Wench Wannabe.
I don't remember any significant PMs to V, but I did encourage him to start the process of healing and moving on in his life because I understood from his posts that there was no way the relationship could be healed. I've seen far too many men and women hurt for longer than they had to out of a false belief that they still had a chance.
There's only two ways to react when someone is hurting - give sympathy and advice and probably end up wrong, or stand back and let them suffer alone. I'd rather realise I was wrong afterwards than risk any chance that the person suffering genuine needs help.
*sigh* You must all be too young for Spartacus.....
Nah, I got that. My response was prompted by shina.
ok, listen up all y'all. If you are not a member of the BigV household can i suggest you just let this topic drop? We don't live with them and even if they posted a blow by blow analysis of the last few months/years, we still wouldn't fully understand the real situation.
BigV and Tink, I am so happy that things are on the mend with you. happier than i can tell you, really, but you two need to be realistic. the wounds are too fresh to be dealing with them in an open and public environment like the cellar. Words on the screen here can be easily misunderstood or misinterpreted. and the truth is that the down and dirty details of the events are no ones' business but your own, don't be ashamed, but be careful about what you post. trust me, i know from personal experience.
Looking back at the posts in this thread - Tink can you understand that after the last few months it is only natural that if V drops a "bad day" message, people would be concerned that the road to recovery you two are on might have developed a few bumps? Don't read our concern as "What did that evil woman do???" you are a cellarite now, so you need to read it as "whoa - are you TWO ok?" it's the cellar, we tend to have sharp claws and thick skin. But at the end of the day we stand by eachother, that means you too.
The Cellar has had couples in it before but we've never had a long time member go through a split, get back together, and introduce their other half, so this dynamic is new territory for us all.
now let's all just relax... *steps off soapbox*
No. I think Tink needs to stop needling the unnamed person. What is she hoping to achieve? On the one hand she's crying unfair becasue she perceives that we only ever heard BigV's story and all sided with him, and then she launches a one-sided attack on another dwellar and is encoranging dwellars to side with her.
I think Tink was brave to join the cellar given that she felt this way about our perceptions of her, and I'm glad she did. But I'm not happy about this picking on an un-named dwellar. And yes, I do think I know who it is and if I'm right, I'm pretty darn positive that these attacks are unwarranted and unfair. That's what has to stop first.
and yes, that was more like $2 than 2c.
Why is paranoia making everyone act as though Tink shouldn't have said what she said? I thought it was great that she brought her concerns into the open, so they could be addressed. Methinks, as Tink said, unnamed dwellar knows who she is; the rest of us don't need to worry about it.
But, lookout's post was right on about we are not in the situation. So, I second most of what lookout said and urge us all to not get defensive towards Tink. We weren't there. We don't know.
....
now let's all just relax... *steps off soapbox*
No - I wanna see Monster's boobies!
there's cleavage here somewhere, i think
No. I think Tink needs to stop needling the unnamed person. ...
I don't see Tink's post as needling. She's not beating a dead horse - she let us know
what happened, but isn't going to tell us
who. And that's ok.
maybe. but it's one-sided. She'll telling us what happened -her version. But, I'm also spent up in the 2c department for now. I would really like the whole topic to be dropped, I am glad they sorted it out and are insanely happy. The public smooching is a bit much for me, but it's a small price to pay to see them happy. :)
So anyway. Back to me.
I'm really really upset that I've got to deal with a leaking toilet at home tonight. I mean it. ;) Gonna have to take a trip to Home Depot. I started out loving that place when it opened about ten years ago. Now it just smacks of chaos whenever I'm there. My wife gets an instant headache when she walks through their door, and I'm starting to feel the same way about the place. I'll buy the new wax seal I need, but I'll probably end up buying a new supply hose and the little foam rubber gasket that goes between the tank and bowl.
I'll get home, shut off the water valve, flush the toilet and suck the tank and bowl dry with the shop vac. Hold on, now that I think about it, I'll need to empty the shop vac first, otherwise I'll have a nasty sludge bucket of wet plaster dust in there.
So I'll remove the tank. Unscrew the bolts and pull up the toilet. Scrape off the old wax ring and put on the new one. That's if everything goes according to plan. It never does. I bet I need a flange extender. I think the closet flange is too low. I fixed this toilet just three years ago. It shouldn't be leaking again yet.
Should I buy some new rubber gloves for this job?
Don't replace the wax with more wax. :eek: Beest found some good modern alternatives when ours leaked.
Should I buy some new rubber gloves for this job?
Oh why not! Splurge a little on yourself, go wild! You deserve it. :D
Oh why not! Splurge a little on yourself, go wild! You deserve it. :D
Yeah, after all, it is only once every 3 years you get to do this!
Should I buy some new rubber gloves for this job?
Nah, just use your bedroom ones.
But, are they (da da DAAAA) latex?:worried:
Now we're talking. I think I'll try some lamb skin gloves for this. They may be a little too porous. Hmm...
I think I ruined my wig. I opened the oven door to take out some fries and I think the heat melted my bangs. the damage is irreversable. go ahead. laugh. it's very sad to me. plus, wig was donated by worthy women who bail out losers like me...they paid for it and I've ruined it in two days.
I just want to go home to satan now.
oh, bri :(
Are you sure it isn't rescuable?
So anyway. Back to me...
Pipe down and show us your boobies!
Pipe down and show us your boobies!
I don't think...
Ah, I don't think glatt
has boobies.
Maybe g1att does, but I don't. At least I don't think I do.
Bri, I'm really sorry about your wig.
It sounds like Tink is trying to be PC and not identify "she". I applaud her for that. Frankly, she (Tink) made it known that she knows of some indiscretions that took place between this other Cellar female and her husband. I'd be upset too.
Sundae Girl,
Glad to hear things are ok with your leg. Let us know if working out helps. That would be good news for the rest of us too if we experience anything of the sort.
Wait..I know who
Tink is...but who in the hell are you?
Welcome to the cellar.
:yelsick:
I fixed this toilet just three years ago. It shouldn't be leaking again yet.
Ahem... ah, maybe that's your problem? Just sayin'. Maybe hiring a plumber to do it this time would be an investment in the (three years from now) future?
hmmm, hire a plumber at $75/hour or replace a $2.99 seal every three years... the dilemma. :yelgreedy
Ahem... ah, maybe that's your problem? Just sayin'. Maybe hiring a plumber to do it this time would be an investment in the (three years from now) future?
You are probably right, but I'm stubborn that way. And cheap. Mostly cheap.
I don't think...
Ah, I don't think glatt has boobies.
He's got 'em - in a manly sort of way.
I think I ruined my wig. I opened the oven door to take out some fries and I think the heat melted my bangs. the damage is irreversable. go ahead. laugh. it's very sad to me. plus, wig was donated by worthy women who bail out losers like me...they paid for it and I've ruined it in two days.
I just want to go home to satan now.
Hey Bri, I bet they'll give you a new wig. These things can't be helped sometimes, you know? Especially when you're cooking food for yourself so you can eat! :)
You are probably right, but I'm stubborn that way. And cheap. Mostly cheap.
Perhaps. But your time (and happiness) have to be worth something.
Take it to a hair dresser Bri. Maybe they can fix it.
No. I think Tink needs to stop needling the unnamed person. What is she hoping to achieve? On the one hand she's crying unfair becasue she perceives that we only ever heard BigV's story and all sided with him, and then she launches a one-sided attack on another dwellar and is encoranging dwellars to side with her.
I think Tink was brave to join the cellar given that she felt this way about our perceptions of her, and I'm glad she did. But I'm not happy about this picking on an un-named dwellar. And yes, I do think I know who it is and if I'm right, I'm pretty darn positive that these attacks are unwarranted and unfair. That's what has to stop first.
and yes, that was more like $2 than 2c.
Exactly...darn it Monster where have you been?!?
All of a sudden nothing is anyone's business, too. Interesting.
If she knew that Spexx normally doesn't show any interest of this kind, she might have been flattered instead.
Cellar learning curve. uuugh. It's ugly.
:D
Why is paranoia making everyone act as though Tink shouldn't have said what she said? I thought it was great that she brought her concerns into the open, so they could be addressed. Methinks, as Tink said, unnamed dwellar knows who she is; the rest of us don't need to worry about it.
But, lookout's post was right on about we are not in the situation. So, I second most of what lookout said and urge us all to not get defensive towards Tink. We weren't there. We don't know.
I am sure there are a few of us here wondering whether we were *she*.
I mean, my pics are on here, I didnt pm V......
hmmm, hire a plumber at $75/hour or replace a $2.99 seal every three years... the dilemma.
Yeah, right up to the year that one doesn't notice the leak right away, and all of a sudden the sub floor and/or basement has hundreds of dollars of water damage... Can you tell I live with a proud do-it-yourselfer? Usually it works out. But the one time out of however-many that it doesn't... [size=1]let's just say I will never,
ever,
ever agree to install a garage door without a professional again.[/size]
see, i'm not a DIYer and proud of it. i wish i was mechanically inclined, but i'm not. my dad is and it amazes me. I tried, but just screwed things up. Then i found the liberating feeling of just paying someone else to do anything i don't feel like doing. here's my logic. If I can hire someone who makes less per hour than I do to do a job I don't want to do then everyone wins. He gets paid, I get to not spend my time doing it, and the job gets done right.
That being said, I did a complete top to bottom remodel on a house last year and I can say in all honesty that you can safely replace the waxie in about 20 minutes with very few complications.
I am sure there are a few of us here wondering whether we were *she*.
I mean, my pics are on here, I didnt pm V......
Yeah...I'm concerned too. And I just posted my face....I mean...I thought we were all husband stealing whores, and come to find out it's just one of us.
Shocking.
:D
Hey, I'm done. All happy now.
It took 2.5 hours if you count the trip to the store and the clean up. It's a bit more difficult than a straightforward job since the pipes are old cast iron, and the flange isn't quite level. Total cost $5.19 plus maybe $1 in gas/mileage. And I figured out the toilet leaked where the manufacture date is right in the area where the wax ring goes. Makes for a rough surface where you want a smooth one. The wax hadn't filled the depression well, and that's where it leaked. I smeared it in there this time, so I hope it will last. If not, next time I'll buy a different toilet.
good work glatt. Now can we not hear anything more about your toilet please? lol
glatt - is it a low-flow toilet (1 gpf or less)? If not, that would be another reason to replace it.
(Sorry Ali.)
geez you two...get a room for christ sake. lol
geez you two...get a room for christ sake. lol
A bathroom?
YES! FFS!!!
Well, at least I didn't say it was
moist.
Ooooh....moist (not the toilet not the toilet not the toilet)!
I like that word.
Ooooh...and piles! don't sit on the cellar chat room floor or you'll get 'em.
. . . we were all husband stealing whores . . .
Oh gosh, I didn't know...
I think I ruined my wig. I opened the oven door to take out some fries and I think the heat melted my bangs. the damage is irreversable. go ahead. laugh. it's very sad to me. plus, wig was donated by worthy women who bail out losers like me...they paid for it and I've ruined it in two days.
Are you 100% sure it is irreversible? Because as I'm sure they told you, wigs can be cut. Perhaps they can cut the damage into a funky new style?
How much do now wigs go for anyway? Do they have to be individually measured? We could start a "TMI" thread again - I know my eyeball statistics courtesy of having contact lenses tests.
C'mon Bri, you're the only wig-wearer here, lets have some wiggy stories.
my wig cost 140 dollars....they do measure your head for fit and some caps stretch for larger heads.
maybe it can be fixed. we'll see. the lady who helped me with it said it could be 'steamed' to fix it---whatever that entails.
And this is your business because........?
Signed BigV and Tink
Tink, you've asked that we judge you on your own merits. I hope you will judge me on my own merits, as well.
Tink, you've asked that we judge you on your own merits. I hope you will judge me on my own merits, as well.
Jesusss!!!! can we not just leave these people alone. stop dragging it out.
I do not see what Tink did wrong. She is trying to defend against attacking forces by answering questions plainly stated and she answered them plainly. She didn't attack. She just said that there was a no-no done by her husband and another gal here. AND,...she said this was done through PMs and Chats.
SO.....all of you who are saying...gee is it me? I guess I am a husband stealing whore..blah blah blah...get over yourself and stop attacking her. Tink said nothing about posts here on the board in the PUBLIC forum. I applaud them for not answering to your attacks as I most certainly would if I were them. But then again, I would be no better the you are.
Now.. Off MY soapbox.
Did I mention I fixed my toilet? (Maybe that should be in the happy thread.)
Oh, and after I fixed my toilet, I fixed my XP at home. Downloaded the most recent double super top secret, extra critical, security update to fix that toilet of an OS.
Oh gosh, I didn't know...
Now everyone is confused!
:D
Aw, I'm sorry about your wig Bri. That's insane that it melted though, just from the oven.
Maybe a (non-flamable) hat would be better for around the house?
Did I mention I fixed my toilet? (Maybe that should be in the happy thread.)
Oh, and after I fixed my toilet, I fixed my XP at home. Downloaded the most recent double super top secret, extra critical, security update to fix that toilet of an OS.
You need to hire yourself out. Mine leaks.....maybe I'll ask Santa for a new one.
Hehe....You are awesome SG. I applaud your sneakiness :D
[FONT="Arial"][SIZE="2"]Our house caught a lightning strike two days ago and I'm still finding damage .... not only did our phones, our alarm system, and a TV get fried, but our ethernet network within the house appears to be toast and tonight, as snowflakes swirl outside, we have no heat. No communication between the thermostats and the boiler.
Lightning. It's such a beautiful phenomenon (not). [/SIZE][/FONT]
Oh wow, that's awful. Covered?
[SIZE="2"]Technically yes, but since we went with a high deductible, so far it has looked like it wouldn't be worth it to claim. Now that our heating system is on the fritz and the ethernet is fried, that may change ... I just hope we don't discover any more damage.[/SIZE]
[SIZE="2"]I should add that most of the stress happened when I first heard there was a problem. The message was that the house was on fire. My daughter (teenager) was alone at home and I was 30 minutes away, and she called, crying hysterically, saying the fire alarms were going off and she thought she smelled smoke and the alarm panel said there was a fire in the master bedroom ... she wanted to find all the animals. I told her to get outside and stay out, and call 911. My third son, who prizes his Siamese cat above rubies, was with me. He knew his sister couldn't go back inside and was glad she was out, but he was white as a sheet the whole way home (so was I, I imagine). So finding that we had had a lightning strike without a fire was major good news.
Still, that kind of good news can wait a long while before we need it again!! :eek: [/SIZE]
Wow, Orthodoc, that sounds like a nightmare. Glad your daughter and all the animals are okay.
orthodoc, i am sorry you have this going on, and i want to assure you i am not making light of your problems... but i just imagined myself in your shoes and i LOL'd when i pictured my dogs jumping out of their skins, then cluelessy running away from the noise, and simultaneously shooting poo across the room as the lightning woke them up. yes, i have asick sense of humor.
Upsetting me today is this:
[ATTACH]15794[/ATTACH]
This is the view from my bedroom window, which isn't that great to start with (I prefer, say, trees). The thing that bugs me is the yellow safety wrapping around the power cables in front of the white building in the foreground. That means they are about to start using a crane there ... demolish and rebuild. Months and months of destruction and construction noise, right outside my bloody window. I checked today and the building is empty and stripped out. Poop.
Bring on the wreckers. Poop.
Thanks for your good wishes, Jinx, Dana, and Lookout - I appreciate it. I'm so glad it wasn't worse. All the animals are ok (but yes, we had a major puddle in the foyer from our elderly chocolate lab - your mental images were probably right on, lookout!) and my daughter has assured me that next time (!) she will get outside, then call 911, then call me. I guess we never know what we'll do in an emergency until it happens; she did ok.
And hopefully we'll have heat sometime today! I don't mind tending the two fireplaces, but talk about high-maintenance. They need tending every fifteen minutes or so.
Zengum, thanks for posting the photo - it's interesting to see where people live. I'd also prefer trees to endless buildings (we have a great view over a rural valley from our place ... I love it even if the teenagers find it boring). Sorry that you're going to have noise and dust right outside. Bleh. :yelsick:
I couldn't find my wedding ring when I woke up this morning.
shit....steve that aint good.
I couldn't find my wedding ring when I woke up this morning.
It's really just a hunk of metal, right? I was thinking about getting mine tattooed on as I hardly ever wear it.
Have you tried looking in between all the blankets on your bed? I lost my engagement ring that way once.
Have you checked under the bed? You could always look in your golf bag, assuming you have one. My husband has lost two, not one but two, wedding bands and I found both in his golf bag. :right:
If you found them both...
Why did he have two?
We replaced the first one after not finding it for ages ... got a new one all engraved and everything, gave it to him for Christmas ... and the next summer when he lost the new one, I found both in his golf bag. :eyebrow:
I couldn't find my wedding ring when I woke up this morning.
Did you find it yet?!?
Jim lost his first one while kayaking, so we both got replacements that we like much better.
Beest is not innocent in the ring-losing department either. Any luck, SD?
Z - it looks like that buidling is in decent condition, could they not renovate it? Unless, of course, whatever they are going to put back in it's place wouldn't work.
I have not found it, and will not find it so long as I'm at work. :)
(I expect to be home for about 15 minutes before going out for the evening, so tonight doesn't look good either.)
Normally my watch & my ring stay together. Last night I did not have my watch on because I was in my concert tux and the cuffs on the shirt are too tight for the watch. I hung the suit up, then about 15 minutes later I realized I had left the watch in the coat pocket, so I went to get it out and left it on my dresser. I have no recollection at all of taking the ring off.
I assume you've already checked the tux pants pocket?
I'm sure we could help with that....
Cicero: I guess that you took it off during clean-up before or after the concert. Try your bathroom.
Obvious choice: Check your entire suit again, and the floor of the area it was hung up.
I did check the pockets. I'll look again. (Anotehr performance tnoight, so I'll have it on again.)
Is there a lost and found there? You should ask around.
Don't you feel naked without it? Mine is such a part of me that if I forget it, I spent all day trying to figure out what's wrong.
Sorry you have not located your ring yet. Quick question, since I haven't been here very long and didn't know you played in concerts, what do you play?
Just a note to Ortho - hope everything turns out ok for you & your household.
Sorry to hear it's still missing. I don't have any other suggestions to add, but I hope you find it.
When I don't have my rings on, I feel sort of naked, like I forgot to get dressed. Very weird.
Thanks, Jester. Things are ok - we have heat on the main floor but not in the upstairs bedrooms this weekend, until a part for our system comes in on Monday. We still have just one computer online, but at least there's one. We'll have to sort out the network problem over the weekend.
Maybe it's time for a wireless router.
Don't you feel naked without it? Mine is such a part of me that if I forget it, I spent all day trying to figure out what's wrong.
My main problem is beating the ladies off with a stick, since there are under the impression I'm available.
Is there a lost and found there? You should ask around.
I will, but I seriously doubt it... I'm almost 100% sure I didn't take it off before I got home.
Sorry you have not located your ring yet. Quick question, since I haven't been here very long and didn't know you played in concerts, what do you play?
I play clarinet. The current engagement (5 performances in 4 days) is with a community theater group my wife conducts.
My main problem is beating the ladies off with a stick, since there are under the impression I'm available.
Side question, not intended to make you feel bad about losing it: why do you take it off at all? Is it for comfort while playing? Ours don't ever come off, they stay on through sleep/shower/everything.
Okay wait, I take it back. The one time I take mine off is when I'm kneading dough, because it's just such a pain in the ass to clean afterwards--but I feel seriously wigged out the whole time it's off, I keep elbowing my pocket to make sure I can still feel it in there.
i never take mine off.
i only lost the one i lost because i got a blister from it while paddling and moved it to my stupid assed pinky.
The one time I take mine off is when I'm kneading dough.
Ditto that. The funny thing is, the only time I'm kneading dough is on Friday night when we are making hand tossed pizza for date night. The only time I take it off it the most romantic night of the week.
Isn't it ironic, don't 'cha think?
I take all my rings off when I moisturize etc, but they go straight back on again as soon as it's all absorbed.
Side question, not intended to make you feel bad about losing it: why do you take it off at all? Is it for comfort while playing? Ours don't ever come off, they stay on through sleep/shower/everything.
I basically take it off if I'm going to get my hands wet. I just can't stand the water in between the ring and my finger! So I'm fairly confident I never had it off at the auditorium. In fact, the evidence suggests that I left it on my dresser and it was knocked off by something else being put down. ("evidence" = the fact that it was lying on the floor beside the dresser.)
I swell a lot, have to take it off or not wear it about 50% of the time.
I take all my rings, bracelets, watch and whatever else off as soon as I get home.
Always have.
Jim lost his first one while kayaking, so we both got replacements that we like much better.
Precious! My birthday present! Precious! My PRECIOUSSSSSS
"evidence" = the fact that it was lying on the floor beside the dresser.
So you found it! Glad to hear.
There was a missing ring joke/punchline but I can't remember it. Good job finding it though.
After spending an hour and a half with my therapist yesterday, she advised me not to get a job, but to go on social security.:brikwall: :brikwall:
("evidence" = the fact that it was lying on the floor beside the dresser.)
Hooray!
Dazza's grandmother had a heart attack and is brain dead. We have to go to Sydney this week.
Very sorry to hear that, Aliantha.
That's terrible, Ali. I'm so sorry.
My condolences Ali. I hope the family cope well through it.
Sorry to hear that Ali, my condolences.
oh, bummer. sorry ali, daz.
thanks guys. I have only met her once (at someone else's funeral) so it's not too emotional for me. It's hard for Dazza and his Mum though. I might have to stay in Sydney and help his mum sort stuff out. Anyway, we'll what pans out over the next day or so.
Once again, thanks for your thoughts. You're very kind.
My thoughts are with Dazza and his family, Ali.
You too, but as you said, not too emotional for you :)
So sorry Ali, horrible to have to watch your guy go through something so painful. *hugs*
What's upsetting me is that my friend L, was taken into hospital last night. I just found out. She has severe rheumatoid arthritis and about 12 years ago had a really bad attack that almost totally immobilised her. They used an experimental treatment which worked and got her mobile again. Law of diminishing returns on the drug though. She was at a funtion last night and it was in a cold village hall. She felt ill and went home and by time she got into her house she was in a very bad way.
I just hope they find something that works again.
Sorry to hear bout that D.
All the best.
Sorry also to post the most selfish of selfish posts following it.
Mid-afternoon HM said he was cooking a roast this evening if I was interested.
I hemmed and hawwed and realised the size of the roasts in the freezer he must already have started defrosting and there would be a right waste if I said no now, and also he probably felt he was treating me.
Well I had already decided to restrict my diet today after having loaded nachos last night. Was going to have smoked salmon offcuts (+cheap) with cracked wheat and raw veg. And tomorrow!
Anyway, I said yes and feigned enthusiam. But it's about four hours since. He hasn't asked how much I want re potatoes or any roast veg. I've already said in conversation I like my lamb pink. I said I'd have a small roast but no indication he hasn't already started the veg (I hope so, he knows I eat before 19.00 preferably).
I'm sorry - I come across as the bitch queen from hell, but I like to know what's coming. I'll be very grateful to his face - and indeed I am - I'd just have preferred some consultation.
Sorry again for venting - I kow I am lucky.
Sorry about your friend Dana. How's she holding up now?
Update on grandmother: They turned the ventilator off on sunday and she started shallow breathing, but she still hasn't woken up (remains in a coma). I'll be calling the hospital shortly for an update.
Aw Ali I missed your post
Any distress to a family member is distress to you
Are you taking the boys?
From what I remember she is not their Grandmother by blood - may be a difficult decision
Good luck and kind thoughts on your way x
No we wont take the kids. I have to sort something out there in the next few days. You're right, she's no relation to them. In fact, they've never even met her. She lives in another city and even Daryl doesn't see her too much.
Dazza's grandmother had a heart attack and is brain dead. We have to go to Sydney this week.
Very sorry to hear that. I have had a few friends have to make some tough, but correct, decisions to withdraw life support on family members. It is one of the toughest things a person has to do. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
I tore my Medial Meniscus in my right knee a week ago yesterday Refing a rugby match. I put off going to the ortho surgeon for about three days until I could not take the pain any more. Finally I went and sure enough just as I guessed. Oblique tear of the posterior horn. Hopefully it is not a bucket handle tear. I will have to have surgery a week from this Tuesday. I hate taking pain meds so I am sticking to the NSAID's for now. I had the same injury about 5 years ago so I knew what happened as soon as I felt it. My last injury was three days on crutches and I was running after about 2 weeks. Such is life...
Sux Merc.
I dumped a full beer into my laptop last night. Upsetting - but I'm pleased that the only effect so far is sticky keys.
knee pain is the worst from what I've heard. I hope it all goes smoothly for you Merc.
I tore my Medial Meniscus in my right knee a week ago yesterday Refing a rugby match.
CRUD!
Ali: If you need someone to keep an eye on the boys, methinks you have a neighbour who owes you favours of this kind!
Merc: It's a rough game, when even the ref does his knee.
"... put off going to the ortho surgeon for about three days until I could not take the pain any more..." :rolls eyes:
Merc: It's a rough game, when even the ref does his knee.
"... put off going to the ortho surgeon for about three days until I could not take the pain any more..." :rolls eyes:
yea, and I am a health care provider.:cool:
Zen...I've been thinking that, except I don't really think she's that stable to be honest. I think she needs to get her shit together.
I'll work something out though. Don't worry about that. :)
Mid-afternoon HM said he was cooking a roast this evening if I was interested.
I hemmed and hawwed and realised the size of the roasts in the freezer he must already have started defrosting and there would be a right waste if I said no now, and also he probably felt he was treating me.
Well I had already decided to restrict my diet today after having loaded nachos last night. Was going to have smoked salmon offcuts (+cheap) with cracked wheat and raw veg. And tomorrow!
Anyway, I said yes and feigned enthusiam. But it's about four hours since. He hasn't asked how much I want re potatoes or any roast veg. I've already said in conversation I like my lamb pink. I said I'd have a small roast but no indication he hasn't already started the veg (I hope so, he knows I eat before 19.00 preferably).
I'm sorry - I come across as the bitch queen from hell, but I like to know what's coming. I'll be very grateful to his face - and indeed I am - I'd just have preferred some consultation.
Sorry again for venting - I kow I am lucky.
You're over-analyzing and internalizing too much.
1) go look in the kitchen to see what's going on
2) ask him where he's up to -it's not rude. You could even ask if you can help.
3) what waste? roast meat makes great sandwiches and these days there's a marvelous invention for leftovers call the
microwave...
4) You want him to ask you how much you will eat? I'd consider that rude, if he is cooking for you as his guest. ..... just an extra tuppenceworth there.
5) I would not expect my guest to dictate meal times, meat rareness or portion control. Why do you expect to?
You don't seem yourself tonight. SG, are you OK?
hope it all went well.
Nah, I've been really really low these last few days. Unable to sleep, finding basic tasks difficult, hating myself - so I was probably projecting some of that on him.
In my defence, I always ask a guest before a roast how many potatoes they want (and add two over), whether they want parsnips, roast onions. I ate to serve up a huge pile of food and have someone pick off one slice of meat and two carrots.
The time issue is simply that - I eat early, he eats late. Originally it was going to be 18.30. We ate at 19.45. Not a problem really, but as a twitchily punctual person I got jumpy.
It all worked out fine of course - the meat wasn't rare but it was very tender and the gravy covered the fact the veg were lukewarm. I'm sure he ate what I didn't afterwards.
I'm going to the doctors on an unrelated issue today, I'll tell him about my downswing. I'm sure it's all part & parcel though. Got a new gym class today (Reebok Deck?!) that might time me out enough to stop whining.
grandmother died this afternoon. We're going to Sydney tomorrow morning.
Sorry for Dazza's loss
Hope it goes as well as it can
Is reebok deck like a step class, SG?
Hormones getting you down maybe?
I would expect HM to ask you are vegies and portion...especially since he knows you are dieting.
I love RPM or Spin classes and *Stomp*....cross between Step and Pump (weights)
Thanks SG. You're a doll.
My grandpa fell and broke 6 ribs.
For the last few years he's been going downhill pretty steadily. . .And I'm not going to be able to see him for at least 13 months. That's optimistic, too.
Yes Ducks, it was a very low grade step class - cardio to start as the warm up, then step, then resistance using bands. I found it very hard, especially the step and there were two exercises I couldn't do in resistance. So I'm going next week. Went to the gym as well - have my re-assessment tomorrow. HM says I wouldn't have been able to complete today's class 6 weeks ago. I just see what I can't do as usual. It's a long road.
Perry sorry to hear about your Granfather - 6 ribs is pretty spectacular. When my Grandad started to fall it sudenly became a common occurrence BUT it lead to him being diagnosed with Parkinson's and having his home fitted out for extra safety and balance. His falls got far less frequent.
All I can say is I know it's scary when your older relatives give you an inkling they won't be around forever - just stay in touch any way you can so you have nothing to regret just in case. I'm sure you'll be back to see him soon enough.
Ali , sorry to hear of ya'll loss , I KNOW its a relief though ( for it to be over that is )
SG , let him cook what he wants ,
you eat what you want , ( if he whines you can tell him you are trying to diet )
smack your lips and tell him him GOOD it was ,
Then offer him a low cal desert
grandmother died this afternoon. We're going to Sydney tomorrow morning.
Total bummer, sorry for your loss.. could have been a blessing.
Sorry to hear about Dazza's gran, Ali. Best wishes to him and his family.
Sorry to hear about Dazza's loss, Ali. Also sorry to hear bout your Grandpa, Perry. Must feel worse being so far away. *hugs*
I have a good news update on my friend. She was discharged from hospital this afternoon and is now ensconced in her armchair at home. I'm just on my way down to see her now, actually. Glad she wasn't in longer, it's exactly the kind of thing that her political enemies would make a meal out of.....with sugared tones of concern obviously.
Still....she's out, she sounds a damn sight brighter than i was expecting her to and hopefully the new tranch of drugs will halt the worst symptoms again. *smiles*
Holy Shit...Sorry Ali....that sucks.
My sympathy to you and your family, Ali.
thanks again everyone. We're off to the airport soon. Just killing time waiting for the cab.
sorry about your Pop Perry. How come it's so long till you can see him?
don't know, but I'm crying and thinking of suicide. Not imminently, just . . . what would happen if I got disabled and was unable to work. My savings would last me about 2 years, and then, pffft! Better to end it than be a burden to my family.
But I think just thinking about is -- a Bad Sign.
But not necessarily a chronic sign. Is this something that normally makes you worry? Is there anything particularly stressful going on right now? When I'm feeling bad, I'm able to easily work myself up to crying just thinking about what would happen to my family if I died, or what I would do if my husband or kids died... What I'm saying is, have you been feeling this way for awhile, or is this just a bad day? There's no need to make yourself feel worse thinking there's 'A Problem' with you if it's just a reaction to stress or hormones.
yeah, a bad day, I think. Took me by surprise. stress and hormones are likely culprits.
sorry about your Pop Perry. How come it's so long till you can see him?
I'm in England until December 2008. At this point I can't really afford to go home to Virginia, much less travel halfway across the States to see my Grandpa.
I've resigned myself to the fact that I'll just call and write as often as possible.
Nothing like the people with real problems, just venting.
Just feel really down and everything is hard work.
After I've typed this (which is how I really feel) I will go over to the Happy thread and try to come up with an equal amount. I feel like Eeyore and Marvin the Paranoid Android's unloved red headed step child at the moment though.
England just lost 3-2 to Croatia so we're not going to Euro 08
It's not snowing here and probably won't again in my lifetime
I never have enough money but my Doc advises me against working yet - and if I took on something part-time I would be worse off
But I do feel like I want to work very soon, just don't want to start and fuck it up - I feel low enough about myself as a person as it is
I feel fat and ugly and moany and unlovable
I feel like going downstairs and eating my big block of Cathedral City Reduced Fat Mature Cheddar - with pickle. Bite by bite.
Okay, I think I'm done.
So you see, nothing really - just bad wiring in my brain. As you were.
(except England - that's not my fault)
Apparently Minifob discovered the concept of "homesickness" for the first time this evening. Everything was going fine in the standard bedtime routine, right up until the minute he figured out he was supposed to sleep in the travel crib (as he always has when we travel, but the last time was probably 3-4 months ago.) He completely freaked out and bolted for the front door screaming "Car car car! Go go go! Bed! Bed!" Took forever to calm him down and ultimately he passed out from exhaustion more than anything.
only 4 more days w/my family:(
Hey Sunday, can you do some volunteer work? Maybe clerk in a charity shop or something? You're right that it would make you feel better to be doing something and will help when you go for a full time job.
The fact that the secret santa hasn't been organized yet even though I suggested it should be done sooner in order for those of us who are geographically challenged to participate.
also, I'm just generally pissed off and exhausted and there's no end in sight.
Sometimes I just wish I could go to sleep and not wake up.
We still have time babba, promise. Monster is hyper organised and it is only 23 November. If worst comes to worst you & me will exchange something okay? You get the short straw receiving wise but I'll already have my present :)
I'm sure it'd be lovely either way mate. I just want to know who I'm buying/making for so I know what to do. I just wanted to do something a bit personalized if possible, but that requires a bit of thought usually, but there'll be no time to put into it. That's all. Anyway, no point saying anything. Maybe I'll just withdraw. I'm not in a good frame of mind for xmas right now anyway.
Grrr... We had occasion to write this delightful little email to my stepkids' mother this evening (background--my stepson is severely allergic to peanuts):
Just wanted to send you a quick note about something [stepdaughter] said this weekend, regarding the incident last Christmas where [stepson] may have eaten a bite of a cookie made with peanut butter. (You may recall that we told you about it at the time: though he did not have any outward reaction, because he said the cookie tasted “spicy” we rinsed his mouth and brushed his teeth thoroughly and kept a close eye on him just in case.)
This weekend [stepdaughter] mentioned to us that you had said we were “lying,” and that you believed [stepson] had actually had a severe reaction and “his face was actually all swollen and stuff.” As we told [stepdaughter], we don’t really care if what she said is true or not—we are never interested in hearing gossip about your house, and at any rate both of them were there at the time and we will trust them to decide what they saw with their own eyes. But we wanted to let you know she said it, in case you want to have a talk with her about either making up things you never said, or repeating things you never intended for us to hear, whichever is more appropriate.
We're still going to sit on it for a few days before deciding if it actually gets sent, or if it just got written to blow off steam.
The fact that the secret santa hasn't been organized yet even though I suggested it should be done sooner in order for those of us who are geographically challenged to participate.
also, I'm just generally pissed off and exhausted and there's no end in sight.
Sometimes I just wish I could go to sleep and not wake up.
I'm sure it'd be lovely either way mate. I just want to know who I'm buying/making for so I know what to do. I just wanted to do something a bit personalized if possible, but that requires a bit of thought usually, but there'll be no time to put into it. That's all. Anyway, no point saying anything. Maybe I'll just withdraw. I'm not in a good frame of mind for xmas right now anyway.
This would be the tirade I was referring to in the secret santa thread. it's perfectly well organized, just because you didn't get what you want when you wanted it doesn't make it a freaking disaster. This assumption that I'm not on top of it is insulting and I deserve an apology. Fat chance of ever getting that. :rolleyes:
Nobody else has moaned about the time line, you did not ask for an extra week as you claimed and i was not unresponsive. you were just having a shitty tantrum, but now that you feel better it doesn't make it ok for me.
see, here's the convo:
I'm wondering if that's going to leave enough time for those of us on the other side of the world.
the postie gets pretty busy around xmas time.
what's your last mailing date for US and UK? You can always pre-buy the gift, so you can mail it as soon as you get your recipients details -you may get someone who's requested to stay anonymous anyway.
fairly reasonable response, i'd say. Reasonable question. If you had responded it was outside the mailing dates, I'd have moved it.
the reason I wouldn't prebuy is that I don't know who I'm sending to. I'd rather know who I'm buying for so I can get them something they might like.
I suppose if the person chooses to remain annon, they'll just be getting a stuffed koala or something equally inane.
oh, no answer.... I ask again and instead i get:
I think we need to get this under way for those of us who want to participate but might have trouble paying higher postage costs. Alternatively, perhaps it should just be for US and Canadian Cellarites and leave the rest of us out of it.
There's not really any other way to say we need to know pretty soon is there?
and
And I don't know what the postage dates are, but in the past it's always been a matter of getting it in the post at least 6 weeks before the big day or you've got no chance. Traditionally even then it's a risk from here.
If I had time I'd go to the post office and find out, but I do not.
and
the world wont end either way. to be honest, I really don't care anymore.
Just take my name off the list please monster.
and
one final thing. I was more concerned about getting a gift to the other person than recieving my own. I like to put time and effort into every gift I give otherwise there's no point doing it.
I wasn't planning on sending a crap present regardless of whose name came up for me.
Anyway, it doesn't matter now. I'm out of the game.
I'd call that a fucking tirade too. had you thought about waiting for a response? or looking up the mailing dates on line? No, it's all my fault because you don't get it the way you want it. it's bloody thanksgiving week here. a holiday. You want me to tell my long-awaited guests to piss off while I satisfy your need for instant gratification? You were just being totally unreasonable. But instead of admitting that -even though you admitted you were having a shitty moment:
I didn't think you were being terse.
I was just having a meltdown.
Things are better now. It's amazing what one nice big cuddle can do.
What tirade? I said take my name off the list please. Forget I ever entered into the idea.
I had a lot more to say here which would have looked a lot more like a tirade than what I'd previously written, which in my opinion was a person simply asking for some consideration. Obviously that's too much to ask in the grand scheme of things. Fortunately for everyone I decided to delete it before I posted it.
you spit the binky and muddy the waters. you could have asked to be removed in a PM. but no, you have to make it like a public declaration of my incompetance to make you feel more justified in your ridiculous tantrum.
I'm sorry you pulled out, in my opinion -and clearly the opinion of others- 1st of Dec is plenty of time to get a small airmail gift delivered internationally. If it doesn't fit your schedule or your wallet, then decline gracefully, don't make me out to be the baddie.
There, that's what's pissing me off right now.
monster, if you feel slighted by me in any way then I am truly sorry for that.
My question was simply because I know how slow Australia Post can be and I've been caught by xmas mailing before. I did not want that to happen in this case because to me xmas is special and I like everything to be perfect. That's my issue not yours, but it's why I worry about getting gifts in the mail ahead of time. It's not a chore for me to buy someone a present and it does suit me to do so. In fact, buying the gifts is one of my favourite things about xmas. My comment about the expense of it was not for my own benefit but for those of us who would like to participate but may not be as financial as others. I did not name anyone specific because I would consider that rude and insensitive.
If you think my request was unreasonable, then so be it. I will tell you now though, that if I had for a second, thought I was being unreasonable, I never would have asked.
So in conclusion, now that you've had your say, please let this be the end of it. It'd be nice if the others who're looking forward to it could do so without this hanging over their heads.
Thankyou for volunteering to manage the secret santa. I'm sure you'll do a great job.
Stupid.... fucking.... football... jerks.
Thanks, Ali.
yes, overland is ludicrously unreliable in most countries. Like you say, usually at least 6 weeks. And that's why it just wasn't an option for this year and I was preaching about keeping the packets light. If you want back in, it's no problem, but it will have to be airmail. Or something bought mail order from the country of your recipient....
...and santa takes care of everybody, so don't worry -I'm sure everybody who has been good will get something ;) (those who've been bad already got theirs :eek:)
I'll just sit this one out. but thanks for the thought.
today? The barrage when I click new posts. I'm getting used to clicking User CP but I know I'm missing good stuff. I was really lucky to notice that the wolf is back on the prowl.
lots of posts upset you? why do you click User CP? I only click that when I want to change my signature or something.
It is moving fast tonight - I only have the laptop til HM wakes up on the sofa and decides to go to bed (or I get tired and go to bed myself)
I'll be gutted if I don't get to the top of the new posts list by then!
Still, it's mostly the same threads in their death spasms I think.
Also don't get why you click User CP btw
user CP lists the threads in reverse chronology that people have posted in after you have. Easy way to follow up on something you were involved in.
New Posts lists all threads with new posts since your last visit.
hmm. I'll try that, thanks! I always just click new posts.
ETA: No, I don't click New Posts. I click Quick Links--Today's posts.
2 new things to try!
I find too many threads started by one particular person annoying because I know when one of you has something important and true to say, I'll probably miss it. It was suggested to me that if I click User CP I can look at the threads I'm already subscribed to so I don't accidentally ignore someone, but I'll miss the new stuff.
The fact that I can't be happy.
Hi Ameliabedelia!
:welcome:
Welcome to the cellar
And :comfort: sit down and have a cup of tea/coffee/whiskey. What's up? Or what's down, as the case may be?
Be warned, though, people ARE going to shorten your username. It sounds like something Harry Potter would say.
If you have a particular shortening you prefer, out with it now.
It sounds like something Harry Potter would say.
Amelia Bedelia is a classic American children's book character, Zen. :)
Amelia Bedelia is a classic American children's book character, Zen. :)
Oh, right.
Thanks.
I thought it was a spell to turn you into a pioneering aviatrix who promptly disappears.
why can't you be happy?
Because people keep shortening ab's nickname. oops... sowwy.
This is pretty damned upsetting.
I don't believe it actually exists.
Like Dry Land?[/waterworld]
I don't believe it actually exists.
"
The Coffee House reported in May about the North Pacific gyre becoming a dead zone for human plastic trash. This is clearly taking hold on the imagination of the public judging by the number of hits received.
People are particularly interested in seeing images of this nightmare but they have proved difficult to find. The Coffee House will endeavour to contact the organisation making these research trips into the Pacific, to see if they can release any suitable photos."
There will be no photos.
Remember, it's continent-sized, twice the size of Texas. Doesn't show up on Google Earth because... plastic is hard to see.
Well, do a Google image search of the Sargasso sea. It's the same idea. The maps all show that it about the size of Texas, but the pictures just show a little scum and seaweed here and there in the water.
Another good writeup of why it's not "visible from space, for pete's sake! twice the size of Texas! Gimme a break" [/skeptic]
The plastic shit that can kill the critters is on the scale of a dime, say. And it is as deep as 50 or 100 feet. It's not like a mound of trash at the local landfill dense and high and dry enough to walk on. It's big. It's sparse. It's there. It's crap. And it's preventable, since the bulk of it came from land anyway.
Should show up on sonar or ultrasound or something, shouldn't it?
I read all the recommendations in Armin's original link.
Now I am happy because I already follow all of them.
But unhappy because if they are this basic, most people obviously don't.
Glatt - re: photo2 - That looks like a line of seaweed. I've seen lots of those off the back of boats for years.
I really don't understand why this thing that supposedly exists can't be seen. Why hasn't any number of environmental groups been able to get one stinkin image of it.
shhhh. it's cuz they don't want us to know that the massive size of this baby is what is really causing the waterline to rise along coastal areas. they're using global warming as an cover up for the massive danger posed by this unsolveable problem! holy crap! :tinfoil:
I really don't understand why this thing that supposedly exists can't be seen.
Because the media has completely misrepresented what it actually is. It is in no way an "island," nor is it floating. It is basically just dirty water, a soup of tiny bits of plastic.
From BigV's link: when you trawl the area with fine mesh (used for catching shrimp,) this is what you get.
The question, just like with global warming, is not whether it "really" exists but what it means. Is it a long-term danger? Is there realistically anything we can do about it? (BigV's link says no, because trawling the whole area would by definition kill all the sea life it scoops up too.) But it's not an "island of trash." That's what we prefer to call Long Island, NY.
I asked Dazza about this and he said that the currents etc do cause rubbish to collect in that general area, but it's not an 'island the size of texas'.
Thanks Clod - I was leaving work and completely missed BigV's link.
Makes a lot more sense now.
So much for my relocating the polar bears to garbage island plan...
That was what I was saying isn't there (an "island"). Some stuff, I don't doubt; but even to call it a stew is hyperbole.
I have water trapped in my ear and I can't shift it.
...ooh there you go. finally managed to shake my head hard enough to dislodge it. of course now my head hurts from all the shaking, and I'm thinking there may be a little trapped in the other ear too. Oh well, it'll have to stay there for now........ :rolleyes:
Oh man, that's what Q-tips are for. I can't stand water or anything else in my ears. You guys swim so much, you should just carry a little packet in your purse.
Q-tips sometimes just don't do the trick. (I do carry them in my swim bag ;) )
Maybe you should get a gazillion little plastic crumbs and squirt them into your ear. At least you wont have any albatrosses or dolphins in your ear canals.
My technique is to twist up a tissue leaving a spiral/helix shape, and drill inwards with that. This reaches pretty deep.
TMI?
was hospitalized for getting paper towel stuck in the ear doing that as a kid.
My mom's ex boyfriend was hospitalized for that as well...bad idea.
This mother-effin' god-forsaken piece of shit job.
2 weeks ago I put in an order for a laptop to take to conference. We take them so we can keep up on emails, and I have scholarships that HAVE to be worked on.
My boss, the big bucks, got one to borrow today. She could afford her own. My co-worker, when told they might not have one for her, said "Oh, that's OK I'll just bring my own."
I do not have a laptop. If they paid me right, I could probably get my own.
They lend them out to Joe Schmo's Community Emporium and say that me getting one is "iffy." They told me that today, just now...no time to borrow one from a family member...no recourse.
No one gives a shit, it doesn't affect them.
I need to get out of this hell-hole piece of shit place.
Shawnee-
The hotel you are staying in probably offers a computer and internet access, lots of places do. Well, if it's a major chain....Ask at the front desk. They will find something for you, or an alternative.
You might get some work done on the town too, by finding an internet cafe that offers comps. and not just wi-fi. And it might be good to get out on the town and grab some coffee or wine or beer or get lay-..........
:D
I know that isn't much help...but that's all I've got. Certainly not as convenient as a lap-top...
:)
Outside of all that- yea...that sucks...people that expect you to do your job without the proper tools and low wages just fu**ing suck!
was hospitalized for getting paper towel stuck in the ear doing that as a kid.
My little sister(at about age 4) stuck a pea up her nose and had to go to the emergency room:greenface
Shawnee-
The hotel you are staying in probably offers a computer and internet access, lots of places do. Well, if it's a major chain....Ask at the front desk. They will find something for you, or an alternative.
You might get some work done on the town too, by finding an internet cafe that offers comps. and not just wi-fi. And it might be good to get out on the town and grab some coffee or wine or beer or get lay-..........
:D
I know that isn't much help...but that's all I've got. Certainly not as convenient as a lap-top...
:)
Outside of all that- yea...that sucks...people that expect you to do your job without the proper tools and low wages just fu**ing suck!
Thanks, Cic. I really needed to blow off, and I appreciate your words. Boss is trying to nudge them as I type, but it's still BS. Like I said, they could have told me...I probably could've borrowed from someone.
I know the hotel has a business center, but those are pretty booked. It's just so maddening...esp when you hear all the time that one of our mantras (that's what I call it, I'm sure they have another name for it but when it's all lip service let's call a duck a duck) is "Valuing People."
So they found one. Maybe I just need to remember I'm an idiot. But when you hear the word "iffy" followed with a slow head shake...Of course boss getting in on it didn't hurt. I just get to be the bad guy.
Back to your regularly scheduled programming.
So they found one. Maybe I just need to remember I'm an idiot. But when you hear the word "iffy" followed with a slow head shake...Of course boss getting in on it didn't hurt. I just get to be the bad guy.
Back to your regularly scheduled programming.
She was power-tripping, and yanking your chain to make you cry. "iffy".
How's that for value?
:D
Now back to whatever you were doing.
My little sister(at about age 4) stuck a pea up her nose and had to go to the emergency room
Sounds like a wasted ER trip to me. I mean, if it were stuck in her ear, that would be something for a professional to get out because the eardrum is not something you want to endanger... and maybe if the item were up her nose and
sharp, you wouldn't want to risk scraping up her sinuses trying to get it out... but a pea? The nose just dumps out into the back of the throat, just stick a Q-tip up there and push it up and out.
I'm sick because the idiots that I work with like to come in while sneezing and coughing all over the place. I think I am going to spit on all their mouses and keyboards
I agree - they are right up there with all the idiots that brag about their kid's perfect attendance at school and send them with green snot running out of their noses. Then their classmates, not to mention the employees get sick and it is big old fucking vicious circle for a month!! :mad2: Whew i feel better now.
I am having trouble holding my head up, and even after brushing my teeth, my mouth still tastes horrid.
Yes, I'm hungover. Yes it's self inflicted. No, those two statements combined don't make me feel any better.
Now I have to go buy a couple of fucking xmas presents! I tell ya, the things I do for some people...
I am having trouble holding my head up, and even after brushing my teeth, my mouth still tastes horrid.
Yes, I'm hungover. Yes it's self inflicted. No, those two statements combined don't make me feel any better.
Now I have to go buy a couple of fucking xmas presents! I tell ya, the things I do for some people...
Hmmm...that reminds me...I should go have a beer!
:D
[COLOR="White"]duh[/COLOR]
It's just so maddening...esp when you hear all the time that one of our mantras (that's what I call it, I'm sure they have another name for it but when it's all lip service let's call a duck a duck) is "Valuing People."
The technical term is "Bullshit." I'm taking a MSc. in business, I can provide authoritative references. [/bitterness]
I am having trouble holding my head up, and even after brushing my teeth, my mouth still tastes horrid.
Yes, I'm hungover. Yes it's self inflicted. No, those two statements combined don't make me feel any better.
Now I have to go buy a couple of fucking xmas presents! I tell ya, the things I do for some people...
Ali,
I sympathize. I was drinking from about noon Friday until 2 AM Saturday, then had to get up at 7 to catch a plane. I wanted to tell the taxi driver to slow down, but I couldn't think of the Spanish translation.
What were you doing to get in this condition?
Perry-
That's why it's more of a mantra a.k.a "spin" like these:
We are beautiful. People like us. We respect you. We would never ever eat you. We are a family company.
The luck of the Irish. (you just always assumed it was good)
:)
Ali,
I sympathize. I was drinking from about noon Friday until 2 AM Saturday, then had to get up at 7 to catch a plane. I wanted to tell the taxi driver to slow down, but I couldn't think of the Spanish translation.
What were you doing to get in this condition?
I only had a glass and a half of white wine then two vodkas. I was a bit pissed when I went to bed. In fact, far more pissed than I thought I should be. I was just having a few quiet drinks at home while I was cooking dinner etc. Nothing flash at all. No wild partying or anything. I'm putting it down to the fact that I didn't eat much yesterday because when it was vomit o'clock this morning there was nothing but bile coming up. I should know better than to drink on an empty stomach, but I guess it's true. I really am stupid. ;)
It's amazing how memories of the last time only hold our hand for so long, then here we are again thinking this is the last time we'll be so stupid.
I said exactly that to my husband when I went to meet him for lunch today. lol I really mean it this time though!
I'm very worried I'm developing a nasty crush on a straight boy.
In fact, I'm even more worried that I already have.
I'm worried today to. My boss didn't call me all day yesterday, and there's been news that someone with her job title has been abducted and robbed.
I wouldn't worry but she usually comes into the office on Mondays (yesterday) or responds to my various phone calls, or calls at least to say she's not coming in. She usually calls in the morning at about 11:00 a.m. to tell me she's up, and crawling out of bed, and how cute her dog is, and what he is doing...I'm going to her house if she doesn't call by 12:30. She's flaky sometimes, but she usually calls to say she's going to flake, and not come in...which is acceptable because I can do a lot of transactions here for her from here....I wish she would call me!!
Last night I had garlic mushrooms for tea.
Now my Dad sometimes gets a bad reaction from mushrooms, so I wasn't all that surprised when I felt a bit achy and bloaty this morning.
First thing I did, before breakfast was go to the bathroom. Aside from the smell of garlic everything proceeded as normal.
About an hour later I feel another visit coming on. I left it as long as possible, hoping to get it all out this time.
I was in there a while and seemed to pass a vast amount! I mean goodness, I wondered where it was all coming from.
None of this made me unhappy.
It was when I went to flush. The handle broke. Turns out some vital connection in the cistern had expired.
I broke it at approx 10.45. HM is trying to fit the replacement part now. At 20.30. My stinky poo has been upstairs all this time and I am so ashamed.
SG - when I was visiting the home of friends in Mexico last week the handle on the toilet broke. I had to open the tank and reach in up to my elbow to open the flap.
Then I remembered that the sink was also broken and there was no soap.
Fortunately we were going to a restaurant for dinner and I was able to wash up there before we ate.
I know that the tank water was clean, but I still had the mental image of toilet water on my hands.
Just imagine fishing about fruitlessly for the best part of ten minutes.
Then confessing to your best (opposite gender) friend and have them work and curse and make calls and curse and go and buy superglue for him and hear him curse... all the time in the bathroom where you laid a toxic load.
Although you win on the fact it was someone else's house - at least I pay to stay here!
SG - couldn't you just reach in to the tank and open the flap by hand (what I did at my friend's house)? Or is it a different toilet design?
this whole goddamned thread is out of order!
SG, that's a really shitty break. Hope it's all working again now though. :)
oh, and you know what would have made it worse?
If you'd had to do another poo on top of the old one that didn't get flushed the first time.
Thanks the heavens for small mercies huh? ;)
i just really screwed the pooch. i don't know what i was thinking but i just shredded a REALLY important file that i'm supposed to keep for, like - FOREVER! this is not good.:thepain:
Can you put it back together like those Qing vases?
Get out the scotch tape...
Hell, just pull all the pieces off the top of the shred pile and mail them to me, I'll put them back together for a modest fee.
If not, you can get in line at the Chinese Job Fair.
see, the problem there is that i once had a client freak out about the normal little shredder i was using. so i got one of those fancy shredders so that it would take the whole cast of CSI a season's worth of episodes to unravel...
Pah! You haven't met my OCD. Now it's a challenge! It's cross-shredded at what, like a half-inch long? I mean it, I could put that shit back together.
I've always wondered about the shredders that don't "chad" the paper to death. I mean, given enough time, someone could repair the strip shredder kinds, couldn't they?
That's what I love about you, clod! :) I know you could do it.
Actually, you made me doubt. I've never heard of one that "chads" the paper. I'm assuming there are still flat pieces to work with, otherwise I retract my cockiness. :)
I'm just throwing words out there that don't mean anything, trying to be clever. 5th beer and all...but I really have thought about how it wouldn't be that hard to repair shreds if you were really meticulous, loved puzzles, and were OCD. We have that in common!
please don't mention beer :greenface or any other alcoholic beverage
Got word from chaperone (this can't be good, right?) on SonofV's field trip to the roller rink. He fell. He's ok, but when he got up, he left part of his tooth on the deck. Emergency dentist appointment in three hours.
ooh, that sucks. but look at it this way. your kid can get BLING! imagine it now, there is no steak he can't chew through because he has a diamond for a front tooth! ooooh, i want one.
sorry, just trying to throw a little humor into a crappy situation.
Every boy needs a little bloodshed or a chipped tooth. If for nothing more than the story to tell the girls. They'll have him fixed up better than perfect in no time - Don't worry.
Still no fixed toilet, so the third day of flushing manually.
And water started coming through the ceiling earlier as HM was working on it - I had to delay my dinner to mop up and lay out saucepans to catch the drips.
Personally? I'd have called a plumber. But it's not my money after all.
[size=7]MEDICRAP!!!!!!!!!!!![/SIZE]
Every boy needs...a chipped tooth.
I gotta missing front toofusus :D
I've been trying to get into the Cellar for over an hour :(
Thank god I finally got back in - I only get two Cellar nights a week on average (yes I post during the day, but very few other people do) and I hate to miss out!
I've been trying to get into the Cellar for over an hour :(
Thank god I finally got back in - I only get two Cellar nights a week on average (yes I post during the day, but very few other people do) and I hate to miss out!
Someone locked the deadbolt, or did you forget your keys?
I fear it was personal.
After all I've admitted to breaking a toilet this week, I'm not safe to be allowed in if I'm unsupervised.
I fear it was personal.
After all I've admitted to breaking a toilet this week, I'm not safe to be allowed in if I'm unsupervised.
That explains the "out of order" sign on the Cellar toilet.
And again, for about 20 minutes.
Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
Every other site works - although none can console me for not being able to come here.
That explains the "out of order" sign on the Cellar toilet.
We have a toilet? Where???
: fidget :
My laptop fell out of the bag and out of the car this afternoon and now has a line down it -one column of fucked pixels. It was fine initially, but now it isn't and it's really pissing me off. (It's a laptop but it's the main computer I use -I just plug it in to a real keyboard, mouse and speakers at home)
After I posted last night I was locked out for good :(
In the end I was forced to watch clips from Have I Got News For You on YouTube. Amusing, but not the Cellar!
I have really bad farts this morning. I did roast vegetables last night and I think I ate too much fibre. Well, a whole onion and two chillies for a start. Hmmmmm.
My laptop fell out of the bag and out of the car this afternoon and now has a line down it -one column of fucked pixels. It was fine initially, but now it isn't and it's really pissing me off. (It's a laptop but it's the main computer I use -I just plug it in to a real keyboard, mouse and speakers at home)
monster - just add an external monitor. That's what I do at home and at work. You can get a nice LCD fairly cheap. You can attach the external monitor and have two screens for different programs.
I was just Layed Off! My last day is to be Dec. 21...
I was just Layed Off! My last day is to be Dec. 21...
Merry bloody Christmas then! [/irony]
That sucks, Cicero. (I promise I was not behind it!)
The timing sucks and the short notice sucks and being laid off in general sucks. Were there any hints or signs that this was coming?
More importantly ... what are your plans for the future?
(At first I thought you'd just got laid, and couldn't understand why this was upsetting you. :smack: )
I was just Layed Off! My last day is to be Dec. 21...
Look on the bright side - you get to spend more time in the Cellar (while you're looking for a job, of course).
What type of work will you be looking for? I frequently get e-mail lists of jobs in renewable energy and they're scattered around the country. I could pass them on, if that's even vaguely related to what you do.
Well, since the housing market has slowed down and taken a complete nose-dive especially with the sub-prime...well you can imagine that someone in that market might not be able to afford such an expensive assistant. My boss is already being pro-active in assisting me to find something else...She feels terrible about having to do it..
I told her that it would be incredibly difficult for me to find a position during Christmas. But that's just the way the cookie crumbles. If I had a good computer at home and the proper amount of savings for the neccessary programs I could open my tax-id again and do graphics.....I have been offered side graphics jobs in the past and my boss turned them down(her number is on all the materials), so I know people like my work....
I feel a bit shooken up. A little lost. I know I need to be updateing my resume and sending it out right now but I'm too upset to think. I think I'm going to go home and do the resume over the weekend and get it ready. I should be spending the afternoon working because now I really need the hours...but I think I'm just too upset and might lose it if someone is nice to me (get all teary).....No losing it at work!!!
:(
My husband is sweet. He just got the afternoon off from work so he could be there for me.
My dad wrote me an e-mail this morning, he had a heart attack yesterday, and might go back in from feeling terrible again. I don't know where he is right now....
Thanks world. I quit for today. Packing it in to go sort my head out. I'm dizzy with upset.
People are always looking for competent people to hire. It's just that my boss and I have worked very well together since I have been with her and it's going to be tough to find a better boss, and better working situation for the same amount of money. (Preview of job-market right now I can expect lower wages)
So there I am...bleeding all over the cellar...but screw it. Some days you just have to say...Holy Shit!! Did all of that just happen?!? wtf?
ah, shit cicero! i'm sorry to hear that. i know there isn't much we can do for you here in cellarland but you know we're all behind you.
Then I won't post anything other than good luck and I have a feeling I am right behind you too. Some weird things going on here at my office.
NOOOOO! No more burrito/chinese wars!
Seriously, I am really sorry to hear that, Cic. If there is anything I can do from here to help, let me know.
(Besides, now is your chance to move back to the *real* mountain state. ;) Lots of jobs in this area!)
I was just Layed Off! My last day is to be Dec. 21...
Been there, done that.
You have my sympathy and support.
Here's some support: it is painful
but not permanent. I only mention it as a first person demonstration of my claim. I do not wish to take anything away from your pain, only your despair.
I really am sorry for the awful news, Cicero. I *know* it is cold comfort today, but this is the beginning of a big improvement for you. You will see.
Yikes. Best of luck finding something new, Cic.
Cicero, oh no. Being fired (or let go) always sucks, but just before Christmas Sucks The Big One. That's happened to me before, I know. Not to mention your dad having a heart attack--that's terrible!
Just read this Cic. I'm so sorry. Keep your chin up, girl, you're a good person with so much to offer and I bet something else will crop up before you know it. The world is giving you the old one-two, isn't it? Tell the world to bite you and show them what for! I have the utmost confidence in you.
Crap! I'm sorry to here that Cic. Keep your chin up and try to think of this as an opportunity for change.
Sorry for your troubles Cicero.
[rant]All this talk about student loans and how much parents are required to be burdened with is pissing me off. [/endrant]
Cicero that's just awful.
You were a PA to a RE agent? Are you licensed?
My husband left for PNG yesterday morning. He'll be gone all week. :( I was ok about it till I missed him next to me in our bed last night.
[rant]All this talk about student loans and how much parents are required to be burdened with is pissing me off. [/endrant]
Well I co-signed a "best student loan" for my son, who only had one year to finish. Guess what? Now I can't buy shit on credit, because my obligations out weight my income. Hell the rates are worst than buying a Lincoln Navigator. Thanks Senate banking committee.:rant:
[rant]All this talk about student loans and how much parents are required to be burdened with is pissing me off. [/endrant]
You don't believe it's your responsibility to educate the children you brought into this world to the best of your ability? :headshake
...which must balance with the responsibility to teach those same children self-sufficiency and maturity.
Absolutely. As outlined
here.Hi everybody! (Skip down to last paragraph if you feel like you'll do too much reading here)
Just an update on my situation of Friday...I'm over it and ready to move on....I will be updateing my resume today and my first interview is tomorrow for a popular cafe here in town interviewing for their books, marketing, and etc. etc.
I vented on Friday, got silly drunk, completely crazy, and over it.
:D
(I was the weird crazy woman that you see at bars that looks interesting, fairly attractive, but completely mad) But I land on my feet when I least expect it.
Sometimes that's really all it takes is for me to vent and of course get all teary- but hey I'm going to walk on the bright side because I know I have a skill-set that someone needs. I'm not even certified in anything but my work experience can match the certifications out there because I'm actually heavily experienced in the complex programs that I am sorry to say, most people down here in provincial NM just don't "get" and don't want to. No worrys. My personality needs the work...I need to be charming, as I suggested that someone else here do, to get the job.
I was planning on getting a super computer with the programs I need to start my own business- but there has been a hitch in my ability to save some money for it all. Just a delay...I was planning to do a side-business creating graphics because people were asking me to do it because they have seen and like my work, and I would have had a client list already...just a hitch in the plan. That is all. (more money, more money, more money)
I will be late, but there for cellar SS still, but the Christmas gifting is going about that far this year. I wish the financial thing weren't so messed up right now is all. Well my last day is the day my friend from Colorado shows up, so at least I don't have to ask for time off......
My dad is still having heart attacks and is in the hospital, and now I know I have to change my ways definitely. I am not overweight, but now I know that heart disease is pretty heavy on both sides of my family so I have to exercise if I think I'm going to make it. I already eat pretty healthily, but I have to start the cardiovascular workouts to be sure. This all seems pretty bad but I'm moving forward and not backwards. I refuse.
Thank you for your support everyone.....as that sucked really badly. I knew it was coming but thought it would stall out to at least a couple of months after the holidays. I was wrong. I know my boss hates the holidays so why would she be compassionate about mine? I was silly.....
:headshake
You guys were awesome in your reponse here, and thank you for your uplifting comments because really that's all I'm going to do, stay positive and proactive. This doesn't have to be a goat-fuck...temporarily it is...but it isn't permanent...It just destroyed christmas as far is gifting goes and I made a fool of myself friday night (I was a total depressive freak)...that's all. Not the end of the world. I hate interviewing...it's always harder to interview than actually do these jobs...
Long story short: Oveeeer it!!! Thank you for being awesome cellar!!! You guys rock...and let's hope I get something new soon so I can hang out! No internet at home!!
~Cicero
(pulling out the boxing gloves but may just use the tape)
:D
Long story short: Oveeeer it!!! Thank you for being awesome cellar!!! You guys rock...and let's hope I get something new soon so I can hang out! No internet at home!!
Glad you're back on track. What a shitty week that was. You're entitled to be a little crazy after an episode like that.
Hang on ... no internet at home ... this really
will mess up your posting rate. ;)
I swear
I was not behind this! In fact, I'm saddened by it. :(
I mean, how can I gloat about passing you if you're not around to see me do it? :D
Cic - just read for the past few days - sorry about what happened Friday - knew you'd be back on your feet. Everyone has to vent, get over it and get going. Good luck for a better job.
Glad you're doing better, Cic! I knew you would, natch. :)
Hmmm.....natch? Does someone want to tell me what natch is?
(Maybe this is really why I'm laid off...retarded)
Thanks Zen....Maybe I will make sure I do well enough to at least have enough internet to stay above your post-count. Maybe you could tell my future employers that I am at least motivated?
:)
Cic, maybe your boss could give you a computer as part of your severance pay...then you could keep coming here and...posting. :)
Cic, maybe your boss could give you a computer as part of your severance pay...then you could keep coming here and...posting. :)
Maybe she could...and maybe there isn't a snowballs chance in hell that I am getting any severance at all.....
:o
Aw crap. I just had a vague recollection that my passport was going to be expiring in a few months, so I dug it out and see that it expired back in August. How did I let that happen? I think renewing an expired passport involves more red tape and money than otherwise. Rats. I don't have any trips planned, but now that I don't have a valid passport, I'm feeling all trapped and confined.
December is pretty busy, so I'll focus on this in January. Maybe by the Fall I'll have my new passport in hand.
:dunce:
In FL I used a little passport office instead of the big federal office. I was faster for getting paper done.
Black, cell phone talking bitch ran into me & my pickup.
Glatt, if you really feel like it, you can pay a fee (about $50 I think) for an "expedited" renewal. Mr. Clodfobble did it when his company unexpectedly had to send him overseas, and I think it only took a week or two. Obviously it was more money, but I seem to recall there being virtually no red tape at all.
Black, cell phone talking bitch ran into me & my pickup.
I'm sorry someone ran into your car buster. I'm at a loss to understand what the colour of her skin has to do with it though. I do agree that people shouldn't be on cell phones when they're driving though.
I hope the insurance covers all the damage.
Well she wasn't white, green, or any other color but black. Bitch, I'll give ya that. Not sure about it. bb
Came home last night to find the basement (cellar?) unexpectedly dark. Hmmm. All (three) the circuit breakers in On position. ??? Could the lights all have burned out simultaneously? And the server? And the freezer? Wait. The wiring closet equipment is all lit. Clearly the UPS is working. Turns out there *is* another circuit breaker down here. A GFCI outlet hosting the freezer sub circuit.
Click. Reset.
Walk over to freezer. It's running. Open lid. The waterfall is dramatically backlit by the lights in the lid. For a moment. Until the breaker trips again.
Somehow,
somehow, the lid to the chest freezer had a LOT of water in it. The underside of the lid is slightly concave, to accommodate more insulation, I expect. And when the lid is opened, the water drains downward, toward the hinge, pouring directly over the lid mounted lights. Pow! After the third time, I "got it", intellectually, not electrically.
I drained the lid by the light of my headlamp, drained it well. All the towels in the hamper were not enough to hold back the tide. I eventually mopped the floor dry, and swamped out the freezer compartments. The freezer held a little more than half a gallon of softened ice. I added a little bit of bleach to the mess on the inside. I don't mind telling you I had some uncomfortable flashbacks to the last time
I had to use bleach on a chest freezer.
It's all shiny clean now. Plugged in and working. Well. I thought it was working when I went to bed last night. This morning, it hadn't frozen anything. Looks like it'll be a white Christmas after all. On the inside of our new freezer, anyway.
I go to take a shower this morning and the water is ice cold. Doesn't change and get warmer. The sinks are all running warm water, though. Damn it, sponge bath!
Today: getting blamed by all bigwigs who don't know what the eff is going on with scholarships. Sheesh. Earn your freaking 70 grand a year, will ya?
edit: cheese and rice..I run queries, put them into spreadsheets, do the v-lookups, compile the information simplistically, and boss turns around and runs her own because she didn't understand mine? I looked at hers and wondered what the fuck she was talking about. Where's the freaking bottom line which is what we need to know for awarding the freaking spring scholarships. I even get ribbed because my meeting request wasnt' set up the way one person likes it. Fuck being chair...all the grief, caught in the middle, none of the pay.
[/usual rant]
Well she wasn't white, green, or any other color but black. Bitch, I'll give ya that. Not sure about it. bb
Retraction! The driver was a 17 year old boy. I assumed the lady that asked if I was ok was the driver. Sorry.
Shawnee-Well if no one knows what's going on with a simple spreadsheet or database, I suggest you award yourself a scholarship!
:p
lol...damn this honesty! What a cross to bear.
Eczema is pretty frikkin bad right now. Don't want to go outside the house or be sociable at all when like this. My own fault, burning candle at both ends for weeks trying to catch up and get assignments in on time, but still pretty annoying.
Author Terry Pratchett has been diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's. (Link to the article at cnn.com
here.)
He plans to keep writing for a while, but I will be absolutely heartbroken when he decides to retire.
shit that's awful. Poor Terry.
Minifob's running a temp of 103.5. He's napping with a dose of Tylenol now, we'll see how it is when he wakes up in another half hour or so.
My middle-schooler's fucking math teacher has just assured them that they WILL have homework during their two week Christmas break
Row with HM Friday bout internet access.
Wasn't forgiven til Monday.
Then given a talking to by HM on Wednesday, due to me having too much of something he offered me on Tuesday night. Genuine difference of approach - if I offer something I offer it unconditionally. But he felt I was taking the piss, ungrateful, disrespectful and unreasonable. He also brought up the fact he believed I had "used" men in the past (something I was not aware of either doing or him thinking) and he said there was no way he'd let that happen here. Oh and he brought up Friday and also told me I could stop "eulogising" him, he'd rather have respect of his consumables.
I'm not specifying the monetary value because it is very low. In those terms what I consumed equals less than the bottles of washing liquid I buy every month without comment despite the fact he has 3 times the washing I do. I genuinely don't mind - I am only making a comparison. So there is more to it.
So am hurt, a bit scared and also veering between blaming myself totally, being furious at him because he has over-reacted, and being paranoid now about everything I have done and said.
Talked it through with my lovely American counsellor today. Made some decisions. For one thing I will only log on when he is out now. Another reason to be miserable but it's his PC and he is entitled to complain about me using chat.. And won't drink with him again for two, which is a social loss, but there is less potential for damage drinking alone, despite the fact that goes against common experience.
My middle-schooler's fucking math teacher has just assured them that they WILL have homework during their two week Christmas break
Assuming that it's a worthwhile assignment. Why on earth would that be upsetting?
What is fucking math? Wouldn't a homework assignment encourage incest? That'd upset me.
What is fucking math?
If a breeding pair of rabbits have a litter of four young (which form two breeding pairs) every month, and young are ready to begin breeding at 6 months, how many rabbits will there be after two years, assuming none die?
If a breeding pair of rabbits have a litter of four young (which form two breeding pairs) every month, and young are ready to begin breeding at 6 months, how many rabbits will there be after two years, assuming none die?
Are they living on Mashfreak's island?
What is fucking math? Wouldn't a homework assignment encourage incest? That'd upset me.
Cute:D
Assuming that it's a worthwhile assignment. Why on earth would that be upsetting?
Because she gets "worthwhile" assignments every night, and every weekend, and just needs a BREAK
What is fucking math? Wouldn't a homework assignment encourage incest? That'd upset me.
It's from Genesis.
Go forth and multiply.Diz woke me up at 07.13. Yes, I looked at the clock.
So I got up, fed them, fed myself and went back to bed to read until 10.00.
Came downstairs to see a Missed Delivery note from Royal Mail. Time 07.50 - at which point I was awake, reading, but with earplugs in. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
Have to wait til 08.00 Monday for the Collection Office to be open. Of course it's an exciting wait because I think it's my Cellar prize. It's just mildly frustrating because it's the first time I've been up before 08.00 in ages and so I could have had it in my hands today!
festive tree fell over. dozens of glass baubles (balls) smashed. :( Just before all Daughter's friends were due to arrive for her birthday sleepover. glass shards in the carpet, the fruit bowls etc. fun.
We haven't had one fall in at least a decade - but my neighbor's and my sister's and my sister's neighbor's have fallen already this year.
My sister suffered the tragic loss of Mr Potato Head (Radko) in the crash - if anyone sees one in their last minute ebay shopping pls let me know...
Not likely to see one last minute, but may see one after Christmas as we're probably going to
Bronners in Frankenmuth to replace the Fire Engine MIL bought Thor when he was tiney but which last year he managed to get a hold of unsupervised. Any good in time for next year?
Absolutely - unless Ive already found one anyway... I don't see Radko on their website though.
Neither did i, but they don't list everything. i think they don't do everything mail order.
my girlfriend is retarded
she's so retarded that i'm not even upset
im thinking to myself i wont even go to the funeral if she dies
its snowing constantly and the streets are slick and she's with her girlfriends driving around in neighborhoods b/c they are bored
and she yells at me for getting injured while playing sports
im so mad i think that im not even feeling any heat at all
if you can't control your woman......how are we supposed to have any respect for you?
He's so pussy whipped, when she gets home they'll have makeup sex, and she won't even know it.
My boyfriend broke up with me. Apparently I am an insane, selfish bitch who nobody likes.
He's not leaving till Friday......when I drive him the 8 hours home with me.
Going to go look at pictures of bento on Flickr so I can stop crying at work. Or maybe just do the mindless work that I have.
:(
okay so be an insane selfish bitch, and let him find his own way home!
okay so be an insane selfish bitch, and let him find his own way home!
what she said.
I'm not actually that mean. I am going home anyways, at least it gives me more time with the dog. I am thinking of putting him in the back and the dog up front.
Besides, if I did that, he would never leave
like your idea about the seating arrangment
My hand is still in a cast and it itches!
bbro - #1) I'm really sorry, #2) what a dick, #3) You're probably better off in the long run.
Oh, and put his stupid ass in the trunk or on the roof.
I know I will be better in the long run, it's just hard at the moment.
my girlfriend is retarded
she's so retarded that i'm not even upset
im thinking to myself i wont even go to the funeral if she dies
its snowing constantly and the streets are slick and she's with her girlfriends driving around in neighborhoods b/c they are bored
and she yells at me for getting injured while playing sports
im so mad i think that im not even feeling any heat at all
My boyfriend broke up with me. Apparently I am an insane, selfish bitch who nobody likes.
He's not leaving till Friday......when I drive him the 8 hours home with me.
Going to go look at pictures of bento on Flickr so I can stop crying at work. Or maybe just do the mindless work that I have.
:(
Just wondering ... how far is it from Illinois to north Carolina? :hugnkiss: ???
My boss is becoming quite the micro-manager, and it's driving us all insane.
Just wondering ... how far is it from Illinois to north Carolina? :hugnkiss: ???
A little over 12 hours.
bbro... you're available.
Uh, what are you wearing?
Well, bruce, since the only time I get on the computer is either at work or the library......nothing :D
Give Butt head the cash for a bus ticket , and change the locks !!!
I have to train a new Padawan !!!
Getting fired at Xmas SUCKS !!!
But it is his OWN Damn Fault !!!
I have to train a new Padawan !!!
Getting fired at Xmas SUCKS !!!
But it is his OWN Damn Fault !!!
bumMER
Well, bruce, since the only time I get on the computer is either at work or the library......nothing :D
Oh [SIZE="1"]pant pant[/SIZE], pictures please.... pretty, pretty please with sugar on it.
sunburn....really evil sunburn
I'll trade your sunburn for some frostbite.
Frostbite - I guess that's what happens when you go barefoot in the winter.
Insurance companies, medical professionals and their representatives
jury duty looming Jan. 2nd. They don't care that I have year end deadlines and reports due the 3rd. They told me so. I'll probably end up doing jury duty all day, and then putting in a full day of work at night. damnit. It's going to suck, but there's nothing I can do about it but wait until it hits because I have to wait until after the month closes before I can start the reports.
i've been called for jury duty a couple of times. about the third question they ask to rule you out is "will your absence hinder your company from meeting it's goals?" raise your hand and out you go. i'm not suggesting that jury duty is unimportant, but if you really can't be there then there are questions/answers that will rule you out.
the last time i made it through all the questions until they got to the part where they asked if we had a preconceived notion as to guilt or innocence. I raised my hand and informed them that the defendent's status as an illegal immigrant would lead me to believe that laws don't apply to him. out i went. i haven't been called back in a looong time now.
I hope that works. But they also state: "Requests for excuses from jury service on the basis of such things as "busy at the office" usually cannot be honored."
thats just to weed out the wussies. make a few racially innappropriate statements or espouse a bit on human rights violations ..... you'll be long gone sooner than you imagine.
I think you should do the jury duty if you're able.
If I was in the pokey, innocent, of course, I'd sure want someone as smart, observant and articulate as you, glatt, on the jury. I don't know about the other eleven, but I feel confident that you would see the truth and act accordingly.
You may be in a position to exonerate an unfairly accused citizen. Or you may find yourself doing your part to keep our streets safe. Either way, justice is served. You don't serve jury duty for yourself--you do it for us, all of us. And in your case, I find that very reassuring.
jury duty looming Jan. 2nd. They don't care that I have year end deadlines and reports due the 3rd. They told me so. I'll probably end up doing jury duty all day, and then putting in a full day of work at night. damnit. It's going to suck, but there's nothing I can do about it but wait until it hits because I have to wait until after the month closes before I can start the reports.
Register Libertarian. It's like wearing garlic around your neck.
I have never been called. Dodged the bullet. Don't really have any desite to serve but would if I had to.
The man should give a talk to all folks, When asked if you can read or write, stick your damn hand up and say "no."
I once got kicked off of a jury pool in DC for briefly nodding off to sleep, and later giggling when the guy next to me leaned his chair back too far. I suggest trying out this combo. The leaning guy got kicked off too, so you ought to have a fairly easy time convincing someone to be your accomplice. I'd say you could try being the leaning guy, but Arlington is a bit more hard-ass than DC, so I wouldn't want you to get in trouble for starting crap (don't bring this up to your leaner of course).
My sister-in-law. She is rapidly barrelling toward spinsterhood, and is upset by this but is doing absolutely nothing about it--yet she and my mother-in-law literally live in this dream world where at any moment she could be married with children. (The most recent example: my MIL asked for some DVDs for Christmas because the ones she has actually belong to my SIL--who lives with her--and "eventually she'll be moving out to start her family and taking them with her." Talk about denial.) The really frustrating thing is that despite my bitching, she really is a very nice girl. The problem is she can't seem to do anything but wait and wait for the perfect thing to fall right into her lap, and as a result hasn't been on a date in ten years.
SO, when my friend who lives in her city mentioned that he has a single coworker (specifically, a police officer) who is her age, Christian, and also suffers from perpetual "nice guy" syndrome, I thought it was a perfect opportunity to pass his information along. Her response?
"What kind of Christian is he? I would need to know, otherwise why would I waste my time?"
Yes, why indeed. Your time is very precious, clearly you have far too many suitors to be able to actually have a conversation with each one of them and determine for yourself whether you have anything in common. Jesus H. Christ. So now I get to ask my friend precisely what church his coworker goes to, and since I am really nice I am even pretending it is ME asking, and that I haven't even passed the information along yet--because it would be a shame if he decided she was a nitpicky block of ice before ever even meeting her.
No good deed goes unpunished, Clodfobble.
You cant pick your nose with false fingernails
There's an upcoming Denzel movie coming out called The Great Debaters.
Come on Hollywood, this is Denzel! And you can't come up with a better movie title??????
Norad Tracks Santa has sold out to Google and sucks this year.
My breath smells.
And instead of doing something sensible about it like cleaning my teeth, I just keep scrunching up my face and sniffing my top lip, to verify the fact that yes, it still smells.
Oh and I had chicken for lunch and am now drinking pop. So I am doing really meaty burps.
Thanks for that mental image SG.
I had the same problem SG, but reading your post made me spontaneously get up and brush my teeth :D <<<look, all clean now
My breath smells.
And instead of doing something sensible about it like cleaning my teeth, I just keep scrunching up my face and sniffing my top lip, to verify the fact that yes, it still smells.
Oh and I had chicken for lunch and am now drinking pop. So I am doing really meaty burps.
Ever considered the comedic possibilities of a Webcam? ;) :3eye:
my ex-husband has prostate cancer. Very sucky news. :(
Bad timing, since he and his second wife just broke up, so he's alone. He called Daughter No. 1 and asked her to come with him to the next dr. appt. This shows how serious it is, but is an added burden on DNo.1, who is basically juggling 3 jobs on top of holiday madness (+ 4 kids and a husband).
We are upset, needless to say, and I'm not sure what my role in this should be, other than caring friend. We are no longer close.
I'm very sorry to hear that Cloud - very sucky indeed.
There's an upcoming Denzel movie coming out called The Great Debaters.
Come on Hollywood, this is Denzel! And you can't come up with a better movie title??????
Like
The Master Baters?
I hope that works. But they also state: "Requests for excuses from jury service on the basis of such things as "busy at the office" usually cannot be honored."
Try a swastika tatoo on your forehead. ;)
No post from my SS. receiver! Hello USPS. WTF
You mean the person you sent a gift to, right buster? Did you see
this post?
I believe he did. As far as I am aware, he posted the packet on th 11th and it has not yet been received.
Automatic vBulletin board messages wishing me a Happy Birthday. So, I've gotten 8 of 'em from various vBbes. They're so impersonal.
No one to thank.
What feels like 3rd degree burns on my arse n thighs from climbing into my leather seats after the car had been sitting in the car park for hours.
That, and I am really over these 102 F days we are having, this was the 7th one in a row, they are sposed to continue til next weekend
So what I'm hearing is that DucksNuts on toasted buns is a seasonal delicacy there. ;)
What feels like 3rd degree burns on my arse n thighs from climbing into my leather seats after the car had been sitting in the car park for hours.
That, and I am really over these 102 F days we are having, this was the 7th one in a row, they are sposed to continue til next weekend
We've had overnight lows in the single digits for the last little while. I'll take the cold over the heat.
What feels like 3rd degree burns on my arse n thighs from climbing into my leather seats after the car had been sitting in the car park for hours.
Is there any way to keep the car cool while you're away?
Is there any way to keep the car cool while you're away?
Apart from parking in Canada, not much.
There are some things you can do, but they don't add up to much if the only parking spot you can find is in the blazing sun.
Silver coated window shades are very popular - the kind you remove and fold up before driving.
Having a white rather than dark colored car helps a little.
I would never have leather seats for exactly this reason - what WERE you thinking, Ducks? at least get some seat covers.
There are gadgets that can be fitted to an almost closed window that fill the gap and provide a solar powered fan to keep air moving.
All these don't do much though.
The normal procedure is to get to the car, open all doors and wait about two minutes before braving the oven inside.
The heat inside a sun-baked car can reach literally lethal temperatures very quickly. I have seen plastic pens, cassettes, and old vinyl records gone soft and droopy from this heat. It is illegal to leave animals or children in a car on a hot day but still some dumb buggers do it.
We don't leave CD cases in the car anymore. Every single one you leave in the car just gets warped after the first hot day.
We used to have a midnight blue car and the heat it would build up was unbelieveable. Now we have a white car it's much better.
Ducks, you should put a towel in the car for the hot days. At least then you can sit on the towel instead of straight on the hot leather.
You should ALWAYS have a towel in the car. A towel is perhaps the most useful thing in the world.
Haven't you read Douglass Adams?
Maybe Ducks likes the burning?
I'm sick and there is no one to take care of me :(
I have no one to take care of.
I have no one to take care of.
BigV, where's Tink? Please tell us that she's just at her friend's for the day or something.
Bbro, Case, yeah, that sucks, you really feel your aloneness when you're crook. I hope some friend unexpectedly drops by with chicken (or tofu) soup.
Thanks for the well-wishes.
Here we go again. :cool:
Get well bbro! :)
Gray skies outside. Ho hum.
remember a few months back how i was upset that some paper pusher in a back room had effed up and cost me $xx,xxx??????? a different effing paper pusher in a different room has effed up and cost me $xx,xxx!!! it is not damaging to the client, but irritating. irritating enough that as it stands now i have lost the client. that adds up to HUGE losses for me over the next couple years.
:eyebrow: this is bullshit. there are only a small handful of top drawer companies that do what they do and i hired the toppest of the top and this is the bullshit that i get? WTF? right now i'm trying real hard to remember why i turned down that offer from a firm that wanted to hire me as an employee. the reasons are still there, but +/- isn't so easily decided right now. WTF?:mad2: :mad:
I was so relieved this morning, because finally, we had a chance to get our burnt-out HVAC compressor replaced. The piece of crap had been replaced just 3-4 years ago before it died again late last winter--but at least it would still be covered by the 5-year warranty, right?
Wrong. I just found out that when the developer replaced the compressor, he had one put in that was already two years old. So, of course the warranty is expired.
Now a $1000 job has turned into a $3500 job. And we get to go back to hoping that the rest of the winter isn't as freaking cold as it was last year. :worried:
that sux - my next door neighbor just went through the same thing - turned out to be $5000! Ouch
Sore throat, aching all over and exams are looming ever larger. Owww. Owww. Also am in middle of stopping smoking and yesterday was first day I have managed without a single cheat.....so....am really hoping i can get through today. I get quite scatty when I am stopping smoking. Am using the nicoteine gum, but still really want to smoke.
Good luck Dana! Its so worth it!
You can do it, Dana! You will love the way food tastes without the smokey flavor.
*smiles* thanks guys. I am feeling more confident about it today than I have since Jan 1st (when I 'gave up' despite fact that most days I have cheated. Big difference nonetheless between smoking one cigarette and smoking 10-20).
It's now 15:25, and I have managed to go most of the day, so far, without it being constantly on my mind. The thought did occur to maybe wander down to my friend's house, ostensibly to visit, but really to finish one of the stubs in his ashtray, but managed to convince myself that was a bad idea :P
Good luck Dana. Have you considered munching on carrot sticks or something like that? Some people say it helps.
And what ever happened with your political showdown that was brewing?
I'm rootin' for ya' Dana. :thumb:
Way to go Dana! Now your lungs will thank you for it! Keep on truckin'.
Whats upsetting me today? We are adopting a dogfrom our local animal shelter, so yesterday animal control came out to do a yard inspection, walked to my side yard, smelled the 100 piles of dog shit in my next door neighbor's yard, and gave him a warning to clean it up. The reason it upsets me, is that I feel like it is my fault they gave him this warning. It does not bother me because we don't use that part of the yard anyway, and I realize it was bad for the neighbor's dog to live in that mess, but I still feel guilty, because they are wonderful neighbors and our kids play together every day.
our kids play together every day.
hopefully at your house and not in that filth.
It's unsanitary to leave piles of dog shit lying around. Don't feel too bad about it binky. When they've done it, I'll bet they'll actually be glad about it, specially if they're as nice as you say they are.
I know its unsanitary, and he cleaned it up right away, I just feel bad because he was really embarrassed bye the whole thing, he works nights and has 2 small kids, and just has it a little rough right now
i think you just feel bad because you were planning on throwing your new pooches poo over the wall figuring he'd never notice, but now... ;)
i think you just feel bad because you were planning on throwing your new pooches poo over the wall figuring he'd never notice, but now... ;)
:lol:
I had a panic attack in one of my college classes today.
We were all supposed to read part of the declaration of independence and when it was my turn to read my voice started shaking and I started getting really nervous.
You'd think this would be a case of being afraid of public speaking, but there were only 9 or 10 people in the class. And it didn't stop at just nervousness and a shaky voice.
I started getting heart palpitations in my chest and in my neck, my hands started to shake, I started sweating, my face flushed, and my vision started to blur. In the end, I couldn't get a word out. I was completely speechless.
So I was siting there in my chair for about 15 seconds, everybody looking at me. Finally I got the words out "could somebody please read for me". So somebody else read. I sat there mortified and still shaken up.
This comes at the worst time for me. I have no friends in college. I haven't even talked to someone I know in about 2 days. All I do "for fun" is school work. I used to be mildly popular in high school with a semi large group of friends. But they are all gone now, and I'm left in Portland with nobody.
And now I get panic attacks.
Wonderful.
Sounds awful :(. Have got a personal tutor you can talk to about this?
Panic attacks are a bitch of a thing because there's really nothing you can do except try and calm down.
Why are you so nervous? If it wasn't the class, then there must be something else and that was just the tip off.
In any case, I hope things get better for you soon. Maybe you should go see your doc.
And the thing that's upsetting me today is that my ex husband took our two sons (10 and 11) to see I Am Legend yesterday. Last night they didn't want to go to sleep in case the mutants came and got them. They were so upset they were crying. They wanted us to get them a body guard to protect them.
Sometimes the stupidity of my ex just astounds me.
No tutor. They have free mental health specialists, but I'm reluctant to see one.
I have no idea why it happened. But now I hate the idea of it happening again. I have no idea who to talk to about this.
Go see the free mental health specialist!
My freshman year of college I was severely depressed to the point where I started failing my classes and I had to drop several of them -- after being a straight A student my entire life.
I was reluctant to talk to anybody about what I was going through -- and I even had friends at my university -- but I finally visited the campus psychiatrist and it was one of the best things I've ever done. They were a real help.
That's like me with The Exorcist when my uncle showed it to me when I eight or nine or something. I was freaking out.
He got a great speech from my mom though.
go see your mental health specialist if it's free. It'll be confidential and it can only help you.
If you don't go you're crazy. ;)
I'm definitely thinking about it.
I just wonder if the panic attack was a symptom of a bigger thing, like a symptom of the solitude that I'm experiencing right now. I don't know...I'm trying to be introspective about it so I can figure it out on my own.
I used to be depressed when I was in high school. I don't feel depressed now, but if I keep going like this I know it can lead to depression.
Hahaha true. Don't want to be crazy.
I'll look into it.
excellent. :) I think you've made a good decision.
I'm definitely thinking about it.
I just wonder if the panic attack was a symptom of a bigger thing, like a symptom of the solitude that I'm experiencing right now. I don't know...I'm trying to be introspective about it so I can figure it out on my own.
You could be right about that. I've experienced panic attacks at a couple of points in my life, and both times, I'd felt very alone in the stresses that I'd been dealing with at those times. I've found since then, that being able to talk about my stressful times (or whatever) to
someone, makes a huge difference.
I'm definitely thinking about it.
I just wonder if the panic attack was a symptom of a bigger thing, like a symptom of the solitude that I'm experiencing right now. I don't know...I'm trying to be introspective about it so I can figure it out on my own.
I used to be depressed when I was in high school. I don't feel depressed now, but if I keep going like this I know it can lead to depression.
I have learned that it's best to refrain from introspection when depressed. This is not a new lesson...I learn it anew each time I realise I am depressed:P Realising it = first step out of it.
from herePanic attacks are a "deadly cycle":
First fear -> Adrenaline/hormonal reaction -> physical effects -> more fear
-> hormonal reaction -> physical effects -> more fear
-> hormonal reaction -> physical effects -> more fear
-> hormonal reaction -> physical effects -> more fear
I started getting heart palpitations in my chest and in my neck, my hands started to shake, I started sweating, my face flushed, and my vision started to blur.
These are absolutely classic effects. What's happening behind the scenes is that your body is producing adrenaline in preparation for what it thinks is going to be a stressful event.
In caveman times, a "stressful event" meant facing a predator or other danger; and so we adapted this reaction, what some call "fight or flight". Your body is literally preparing for a physical situation where it may be called on to act quickly and with maximum force. Hormones are giving signals: tighten the muscles. Quicken the heart. Stops the involuntary processes not needed, like digestion, and move blood to the head, face, etc.
You are not facing a speech, you are facing a sabre-toothed tiger.
In the case of public speaking, you are faced with a double-deadly situation... you know that people could sense your fear. So you're already in a situation where more fear produces more fear - not just hormonally, but psychologically.
There is a connection between panic and depression; they seem to be different aspects to certain types of brain chemistry. Antidepressants are also generally good for panic, general anxiety disorder, social anxiety, and obsessive/compulsive disorder. This is not to say you should be on meds, but only the head doc should say, for sure, at first. There are other temporary solutions, talk therapy is possible, reading up on coping techniques, etc.
Also, I would mention all this to the prof, they should be more understanding about the situation and help out.
I've missed a session of counselling.
I was convinced that it started at 11.30 today, and planned my morning to this end. I arrived at 11.05 (I am always early, it's part of who I am) to find it had started at 11.00 and I was locked out.
I sat there so smugly on Monday when it was explained that lateness was not tolerated (all part of helping us establish the boundaries we haven't been respecting while drinking) and if you were late by even one minute you missed the whole session.
Very disappointed with myself for such a pointless mistake. Dreading telling HM, although I will because lying won't help.
Still - I walked past two pubs on my way here. And despite the sneaky voice in my head saying I deserved a consolation and after all I haven't been told I have to abstain completely and anyway it would be their fault for being inflexible etc etc etc I have come here and not had a drink. Which is good.
I'll go to the gym when I get back home, which I didn't expect to have time to do today. And hope the unhappy feeling goes away once the endorphins kick in.
Ack SG, hope you feel better soon. Don't beat yourself up over it, it's an easy mistake to make. Like this morning i arrived at my exam having forgotten my student id. They could have stopped me sitting they exam (they didn't). High stakes, but a very simple an easy memory slip. Mixing up a 11:00 and 11:30 start time is easily done m'dear.
@PoL. Depression doesn't always manifest in the same way every time. You have experience of depression, but that doesn't mean it can't still surprise you sometimes.Also, personally, I find it becomes most apparent to me when my interactions with people I am emotionally close to become a little strained. I don't know if you find the same, but if you do, then being somewhere without access to those people may be depriving you of one of those key indicators.
You mention that there are only a few class members and thereby discount fear of public speaking. Fear of public speaking doesn't arise because of the number of people as much as it derives from the context. I've engaged in a fair bit of public speaking in various contexts, from minor presentations in college to speaking at small-medium rallies, through to local radio station interviews. In most cases I start nervous, find my feet and get almost to the end before nerves resurface at anticipating the close. But...the most nerve wracking of all of them, was having to deliver something very small, to a group of classmates/colleagues.
Go talk to the counsellor. It'll help...at the very least it can't be worse. You need to find your equillibrium in this new environment and the isolation sounds like it may be self-perpetuating.
[eta] forgot to mention, but meant to: Undertoads post seems to totally nail the whole panic attack mechanism. His advice is worth underlining.
We are about to get slammed by the severe thunderstorms that hit the South yesterday.
http://radar.weather.gov/Conus/full_loop.php:( ack that sucks merc. How bad is it likely to get?
You never can tell. The thunderstorms are not to bad as long as the lightning strikes do not hit a tree over your house. So far we have missed most of the bad hail, but that can be a bitch as well. But if we get tornados, as many of the places hit last night did {21 reported tornados}, then all bets are off. Looking at the radar it should be here in the next 2 to 3 hours.
It's rain. You can be thankful for that.
Looking at the radar it should be here in the next 2 to 3 hours.
It's migrating your way, then?
:D
It's rain. You can be thankful for that.
True dat, and God do we need it.
It's migrating your way, then?
:D
HA! :D
:biggrinba
Crabs.
No, not that kind. the family wants seafood for dinner. I hate seafood.
I've never been a huge fan of seafood in general, either. I almost always get some form of fried shrimp.
i do enjoy a nice mahi mahi if done well, but it seems like i rarely enjoy how it was prepared at a restaurant.
i think you just feel bad because you were planning on throwing your new pooches poo over the wall figuring he'd never notice, but now... ;)
Doh! you caught me:blush:
I just found out the venue that is displaying my art right now closed down....oh and one of my paintings was stolen. :(
I just found out the venue that is displaying my art right now closed down....oh and one of my paintings was stolen. :(
I guess you'd better get on it with your own gallery then huh??
:D
Sorry...just a little reminder.....
That sucks case.
I just found out the store where I work is closing, which is upsetting for two different reasons:
1. No Store = No Job
2. The gals I work with are all really cool people, so (as cheesy as this sounds) I'm going to be really sad to be parting ways with them.
:( that sucks chocolatl.
Oh, and bad luck case. :(
W...T...F?!
No offense to lawyers here, but I freaking hate the intricacies of the legal system.
Background: In August of 2004 my employer imploded. When all was said and done, we were ultimately never paid for the last 3.5 weeks of work. We dutifully filed our claims with the bankruptcy court and were told that we should not expect anything to come of it for many years, if ever. Meanwhile, some of the more bitter/pro-active employees determined that aside from not paying us our actual salaries, the company had violated the WARN Act: a law (in Texas only maybe?) which basically says you must either pay 2 months' severance or give 60 days' warning when massive layoffs (say, the whole company) happen. So we all shrugged and let them file a class action suit to claim that money as well, thinking we'd never see a dime either way, and moved on with our lives.
About 6 months ago we were informed that the class-action law firm had stuck with it over the years, and the judge had partially ruled in our favor. So IF there were any money to be had at all (still a dubious possibility,) we were all now entitled to an additional $1750, minus one third for the lawyers. Great, whatever.
Today, several days after the deadline to opt-out of the class action lawsuit, somebody goes through the fine print (in the paperwork that most of us never received because neither these lawyers nor the bankruptcy court in NY give half a shit about keeping their mailing lists up-to-date) and determines that, as far as us non-lawyers can tell, being part of this class-action thing (which we all are by default, unless we opted-out) means we waive any other money claims, including our unpaid wages, which are in most cases much higher than $1750-minus-one-third. And it's looking like there will be money to pay us after all... so essentially, we have just let some class action lawyers lower our payouts while taking a third of it. I refuse to believe that they didn't damn well know this was what they were doing; they had all our salary information as part of their "severance pay" calculations.
Maybe we're wrong. Maybe we still have both the wage claim and the class-action claim. But I'm pretty pissed off about how complicated and slow the whole fucking process is. I was happier back when I had assumed we were getting nothing and forgotten about it.
we have just let some class action lawyers lower our payouts while taking a third of it.
Are you skipping the Edwards rally then?
Ah, Edwards. The lawyer that made millions screwing Doctors for things that weren't their fault, using junk science on unwitting juries.
you two are just jealous because he is the the only hope for the future of america.
sorry, i just went back and re-read that. you guys aren't talking about the guy who talks to your dead relatives? He's much more ethical and trustworthy than that douchebag politician.
This was in my inbox this morning from the Iowa Bicycle Coalition. (bolding mine) GRRRRRR!!!! Please read the first link, it is very interesting. Although the report was for the Victoria Transport Policy Institute, it's still something to think about.
I will be investigating this further, and will post subsequent commentary in the bicycling thread.
Today, Senator Putney has filed SF2006. This bill requires all persons who operate or ride a bicycle on a primary or secondary road to have a bicyclist's license. A nonresident bicyclist is not required to obtain a license. A license is not required to ride on a municipal street or designated bicycle path. A license is also not required to ride a bicycle while participating in a race or event of more than 30 participants where one of the primary activities is riding a bicycle. A person who violates the new requirement is guilty of a simple misdemeanor and must pay a scheduled fine of $10.
At a time when we should be encouraging more bicycling, the legislature is proposing another barrier. What is most troublesome is as many as 250,000 cyclists will just hang up their bikes - adding to traffic congestion, air pollution, and more damage to our roads. On the surface, it seems like a means to generate revenue, but if you take a look at http://www.vtpi.org/whoserd.pdf you may think differently. No other state in the US requires a license to drive a bicycle.
Do we really need to ask our third graders to cough up $10 so they can ride their bikes to school rather than suffer from obesity related health issues?
What can you do? 1. Join the Iowa Bicycle Coalition. 2. Come to the Bicyclists Day on the Hill on Thursday. 3. Attend Bike Night on Saturday at the Capitol Room in Des Moines. 4. Come to the Iowa Bicycle Summit on Friday or Saturday or both days. More on this and more at http://www.iowabicyclecoalition.org
* Rolls eyes, shakes head sadly *
Labrat, you wanna borrow my slapping-up-the-back-of-the-head gloves?
True, I've seen cyclists do some dumb moves from time to time. Demanding licenses seems silly - if you must, just bust and fine the ones that do the wrong thing.
Wow, a license to ride a bike? Sounds like Iowa State Senator John Putney is a moron.
He probably wants to ban bikes outright, and is working at it one step at a time. I just Googled his name and see that he has pushed legislation in the past to ban bikes from some streets. His web page says that he commutes 75 miles each way to work from his rural farm. I bet he hates getting stuck behind a bike on a rural road for a few seconds until it's clear to pass. If you look at his pictures, it's clear he isn't someone who rides bikes.
Glad I don't live in this jerk's jurisdiction.
It's Iowa. A near sighted sheep saw a guy on a bike and misunderstood what he was seeing. In a fit of jealousy the sheep told the rest of the herd. You've played the game "telephone" right? Now imagine it in a herd of sheep. Somewhere in the middle of the herd the message changed to "our humans are mating with bicycles which are obviously easier to catch than we are. This could lead to our extinction".
Sheep may not be smart but they do gossip freely, and soon neighboring herds heard the story as well. In nearby Henry County the news finally reached a very civic minded sheep. He called an attorney and told him the story. The attorney, of course, could only say, "hello? hello? Is anyone there? It sounds like a herd of sheep there. Hello?" So the civic minded sheep kept calling attorneys but found no success. No success at all. Zip. Zero.
Until that fateful morning when he called his congressman. The congressman, fortunately for the sheep, was a career politician. He was fluent in many languages including, but not limited to Legalese, Bullshit, Misdirect, Douchebag, and backstabbery. He had a limited knowledge of English, but had extensive experience in speaking with sheep. This congressman listened to the sheep's plight and nearly jumped with joy at the opportunity before him. "WOWeeZOWee, you mean I get to put my name on a bill, raise revenue, screw over those upperclass bike owners, AND I'll get some sheep to vote for me???"
And that is how a bill is born.
...and he gets to fleece the masses ...
My son has had diarrhea for a week now... first from a stomach bug, then from the antibiotics for his ear infection. And his ears still hurt. I feel so sorry for him and hate for him to be sick. And now my hubby is feeling sick... :(
Labrat, that article only says the fine is $10. Is there actually a fee for obtaining the license?
I couldn't find a fee amount either. It seems this all stemmed from someone getting killed on a bike and his widow winning a lawsuit.
cyclists' suits
ATLANTIC, Iowa — More than 20 county boards in Iowa have passed resolutions urging the Legislature to protect counties from lawsuits stemming from injuries suffered by bicyclists on county roads.
On Wednesday, Cass County became the latest.
"These roads are built for large vehicles and cars," Cass County Board member Duane McFadden said. "We definitely don't want to discourage people from biking, but there's definitely a liability concern."
The list of counties seeking protection from the lawsuits is expected to grow. The proposal had nearly unanimous support among members of county boards from around the state at their fall meeting.
The resolution grew out of a lawsuit filed against Crawford County by the family of Kirk Ullrich, who died in the 2004 RAGBRAI cycling event.
Ouch aimee that really sucks :(
I'm a cyclist and a motorist and there are some complete pillocks who bike on the main roads and who have no traffic sense whatsoever. Whilst they can get away with that crap on slower roads, it's a nightmare in 40 mph traffic. If they had to get a licence that forced them to acquire/demonstrate some traffic sense, I'd be all for it. If it was just a source of revenue and any dipshit could get one, I'd not be so impressed.
examples of dipshit bike behaviour:
no lights at night
cycling on the wrong side of the street
combining the above
ignoring traffic signals and apparently assuming traffic in the other direction should give way as if to a pedestrian
swerving round potholes etc without first looking behind
Not saying that the motorists aren't equally dangerous/stupid, but at least in theory they should know how to drive near cyclists. A little theory would be a step in the right direction for the stupid cyclists.
oops, ranting again.
Thanks Dana. My little one's getting over the diarrhea... but his ears still hurt. Wish I could make it go away. Hubby's feeling a little better...
I'm a motorist and cyclist... but I just stick to roads with little traffic when I bike, and wear bright clothes, and I'm not stupid enough to cycle at night... It annoys me when cyclists ignore traffic signs as if they have the right of way. Its almost asking to get accidentally hit.
I have seen a little old Japanese lady cycling at night on a major road, no lights, no helmet, while holding an umbrella with one hand and using her shoulder to prop her mobile phone to her ear.
I applauded as she went past. I'm mildly surprised she didn't wave.
From the actual bill via the
Iowa General Assembly's website:
A license costs $10, is valid for five years, and appently there is no test to obtain one.
The licensing agent gets $1 of the license fee, the other $9 goes into the general road use tax fund. A replacement license costs $2, with all of that going to the road use fund. All of the information collected on the license (licensee's name, DOB, address, signature, date issued, and number) goes into a database. A list of license holders is available to anyone who wants to pay the fee for it, once a fee schedule is established.
Next they should have a pedestrian license. After all, they cross the streets sometimes.
I need to find out if farmers need to be licensed to drive their farm machinery on these same roads.
IMHO, a 2 ton tractor pulling 4 tons of grain cause a a bit more damage than a freaking bicycle. The only damage I can imagine that results from bicycles is the result of the chemicals used to clean their operators blood and brain matter off the roads when some dumbass creames one...
In which case we'd better start requiring deer to have licenses to cross roads, since bloody car-deer accidents are about 1000X more common than car-cyclist ones around here.
Deer don't sue.
If they can legislate for licenses, maybe they could just legislate that if you screw up on a bike and get squished by an SUV, it's none of the states fault.
Maybe that's what the licenses are all about. Next person to get squished ... "Oh, riding without a license, were you, eh? Don't look at us!"
I almost thought it might make sense, until you said there's no test.
Now, if there were a test of the knowledge of bike riders to make sure they know their rights and responsibilities...that would be a bit different. Otherwise, it's just putting their hand out.
I imagine it's like the PA registration renewal where it says by signing the registration you acknowledge you've read and understand the liter laws.
Kind of a ULA that proves you were aware of the risk of getting creamed, and the County can't be held responsible.
Some jerk called me at work today and threatened to file a complaint against me with my state Secretary of State notary division. The issue isn't an improper notarization; he says I refused to comply with a request for records. He sent me a certified letter with the request, which I did not get around to picking up. Whatever, I'm totally happy to provide a copy of my records (and I always keep meticulous notary records), but the guy is just a jerk. The kind of guy who thinks he knows the law and quotes chapter and verse at you, belligerent and threatening.
And he plans to show up at my office tomorrow. Oh, joy.
Clod: class action suits are extremely complicated, even for the lawyers. There should have been a representative Plaintiff or Plaintiffs to handle the responsibility of the paperwork and keep in touch with the lawyers.
There should have been a representative Plaintiff or Plaintiffs to handle the responsibility of the paperwork and keep in touch with the lawyers.
Yeah, there were two of them. Turns out they're just morons--they have defended the current situation as hunky dory because they weren't expecting to get any of their salary back anyway. They fundamentally do not understand that whatever chance they have of getting this class action money is exactly the same chance they had of getting their unpaid salary. Personally, the cynic in me suspects that those two people didn't manage to file their B-12s with the court on time claiming their wages, so this
is a better situation for them... and only them.
Sorry, Ms.Clod--hope you eventually get some money out of it.
My notary complaint situation escalated today with a face to face confrontation. That makes two--count 'em--sobbing hysterical episodes at work for me this week, ugh. (That is why I didn't become an atty!). The guy's probably going to file a complaint against me with the SOS. I can't imagine that anything will come of it, but it's still FUCKING UPSETTING!
He's not worth my emotion--but as much as I intellectually know the world is full of jerks, deep down inside I don't understand people like that. I don't understand mean people, people who deliberately set out to make trouble for others, or who are deliberately being combative and obnoxious. Guess I'm just too nice of a person. :(
I went to an AA meeting on Saturday. Bored me rigid. Only one person even mentioned the temptation to drink, the rest of them were talking about their childhoods and how wonderful AA was and how it saved them.
But I am aware many people get on with it, and get on well, so I thought I would give it another go in another location tonight. Only to find the time on the internet is not the same as the time in my booklet. Hmmmm. And the address they use both in the booklet and online does not correspond to any location recognised by any map online - they give the name of the hall and the only results in google for that name are on the AA website. The hall isn't mentioned on the website of the church I think the hall is attached to, but said website isn't fully up to date (their next Alpha course apparently starts in September 2007) and much of it is still under construction so I can't rule it out.
So when I leave here I need to go via the location in order to check it out, which means I'll be later home and then have to rush before I go back out again. Which is tempting me to leave it for another night, but then part of me says that's putting it off because I don't want to go... Argh.
Go early and sit on the front steps drinking from a paper bag until they show up.;)
:mad: Can't sleep, it's nearly 3AM, and I start work moving furniture from 8-5 tomorrow morning.... so in 5 hours basically.
Ducks, nothing in perpendicular I just hate them.
Mum's house flooded and her new carpet is fucked.
We have a leak in garage roof, in the house we bought 6 mos ago and I can't find the receipt for our roof certification
Ducks, nothing in perpendicular I just hate them.
:sniff: what I do?
I have been waiting for a letter from the Benefit Office to prove I am currently receiving Incapacity Benefit @ £61.35 per week for two weeks now. I need it to take to the Magistrates' Court to negotiate a smaller monthly payment on a debt I owe. I have now made four phone calls and the paperwork was due in court yesterday.
I hope that when I get home today the letter is there. I'm only here (Welling, 35 mins away) because the post doesn't come until late afternoon. I'm already getting mad at the idea that it still might not be there when I get home.
How can people be so bloody inefficient, especially when I told them the second time I called what it was for and how important it was.
SonofV cut himself in woodshop today. They say he's ok. I hope so. I watched a kid amputate the end of his finger with a bandsaw when I was in woodshop...
bzzt.
What?
ohmygod. aaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!
Ouch!
Nothing's upsetting me today! Whew!
SonofV cut himself in woodshop today. They say he's ok. I hope so. I watched a kid amputate the end of his finger with a bandsaw when I was in woodshop...
bzzt.
What?
ohmygod. aaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!
dangerous place, school. I guess this one was at least cheaper than the tooth, though. That picture haunts my nightmares....
SonofV cut himself in woodshop today. They say he's ok. I hope so. I watched a kid amputate the end of his finger with a bandsaw when I was in woodshop...
bzzt.
What?
ohmygod. aaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!
Be glad he has a woodshop to cut himself in. The fascination with standardized tests is killing off shop in some places.
My boss. I even hung up on him today. I was on my way out of here...then..he apologized for sounding terrible...but I still have to find something new already. This job really isn't working out so far...I'm seeing some true colors already, and they are ugly....
I can put up with lowering my wages for a good boss..not a bad one.
So that's it for the complaint department...I guess I'll just have to move on again.
Hope you guys are doing better than me and having an awesome weekend!!
I got home early this evening, and turned on the reverse-cycle air-conditioner to warm my apartment. There came a loud CRACK noise from the outside part of the split system. The A/C never started blowing warm air and constant fiddling with the controls (which are in Japanese) only ever got it to circulate the air inside the room.
This did of course happen on a Sunday evening. In the middle of winter. The web indicates that the current temperature is 2C (34F), but -2 (28F) with windchill. The forecast is for -2, which, allowing for windchill, will probably take us to about -5 (23F). This is one of, if not THE, coldest nights I have seen in this city.
Now, I know you cellarites in Northern USA will scoff at such temperatures being called "cold", but this building, like many in Japan, has crap all insulation. It is COLD in here.
Well, it was. I rugged up with two pairs of warm pants, double socks, t-shirt, two thermals, two sweaters, fleecy jacket, two beanies, and gloves, but I was STILL cold. When I could see my breath condensing in the air I decided to get the portable electric hot plate and set it on a cleared patch in the living/bed room. This has made the room much warmer but is not a good arrangement.
The good thing is that my rental agency will sort this out, but that will take time.
Just more crap to deal with.
I got service here quickly because there were some tech chaps in the building already. Why? The pipes have frozen. I told you it was cold. This has not happened before.
Now, no shower, and even morning coffee is difficult.
Brrrrrrrrrrrrr.
1) Boss called in sick (on her day to do all counseling)
2) Other counselor had a sudden dentist appointment
3) DD went in today and my account is still overdrawn
4) I'm jealous (a nasty emotion) of everyone with money, and those with no jobs who still have more money than I seem to be able to hold onto
5) Homeless Guy has given me some money, but hasn't made efforts to start meaningful contributions to the household
6) I can't stand myself or my life right now
Kthx. I needed to vent. I suck.
:(
Shawnee, you need your own tip jar. Even while exploring the depths of your own deep well you make me laugh.
You cannot possibly know how nice it was to read that, HLJ! Thanks. :) Not that I agree with a tip jar, ;) just the thought is funny, and knowing I make you laugh is a nice thing. Dwellars have done far too much for my sorry ass already.
Shawnee- I know how you feel. I'm about to walk out on my job because my boss deserves it. I don't even have another job lined up and I'm broke because I took a stupid risk and took this low paying job. I was supposed to be making new account commissions and haven't seen a dime and never will....I'm quitting today, or at least putting in my 1 week notice. Sad. I can't afford to quit but I have to.
Good luck to you, Cic. So sorry this didn't work out for you. I believe that most things do have a purpose for happening, and that things could be SO much worse, but when you're in the midst of all the crap it's hard to see it all that way.
You deserve much much better. Hang in there.
lol! My boss didn't even listen when I was trying to quit. I told him me working here isn't working out and he started to tell me his problems. He doesn't believe me or what?!? Crap.
I guess I'll just not be here one day before he gets it.
As far as deserveing better....the same applies to you Shawnee....
:)
Honey you may not have any money...but at least you have our respect. You obviously can't buy that...
I'm tired. Like dog tired. I have an ever increasing workload at Uni, an ever increasing work load in the Party and an ever increasing number of fecking meetings to attend. Shit in the party is really getting to me again.
lol! My boss didn't even listen when I was trying to quit. I told him me working here isn't working out and he started to tell me his problems. He doesn't believe me or what?!? Crap.
I guess I'll just not be here one day before he gets it.
As far as deserveing better....the same applies to you Shawnee....
:)
Honey you may not have any money...but at least you have our respect. You obviously can't buy that...
Sounds like boss is a kind of a bonehead!
Yeah, Homeless Guy came home last night and I was crying my eyes out . What's wrong? I told him my woes: Homeless Guy barely noticed. Homeless Guy got his first big 2 week paycheck but is worried about having money "for the weekend." Homeless Guy has no bank account, so Homeless Guy's money is somewhere, and I am going to find it and take some. Homeless Guy has done the same to me.
Homeless Guy was given a deadline of March to shape up or ship out. It ain't looking good. It's my own fault for feeling sorry for him, for handing him money all the time, for letting him move in with me when his house caught fire.
Homeless Guy's Sucker (aka Shawnee) is a complete and total doormat fool. People could say "I told you so" because they did.
Oh well, I know it's the same old crap with me, and my fault. But thanks for letting me vent.
I'll send you some money if you kick him out. pm me!!
:)
oh dear, I don't want my bitching to sound like I would want anyone here to help me out. That is not what I'm saying at all. I mean, I know you're kidding but I really hope that everyone understands that. Like I said, many people here have already done way too many nice things for me that I feel like I don't deserve.
However, when I kick him out we'll have a big "WoooHooo" thread.
(The problem is, I like the guy. He's kind, never berates, makes me laugh, is nice to my cats...and to be honest, I have been on the other side where the guy is not so nice, and worse. It's just a damn sucky situation any way I slice it. Not that I mind being alone...I am great at being by myself, but at most times I like his company.)
Oh fudge.
Eh, let's let someone else use this thread aside from my whining ass. ;)
:mock: lol!! You are falling for the homeless guy lol!!! That's what you are so pissed about!! lol!!
Oh honey, I fell for him about 3 years ago. Moved in with him, moved out, let him move in. I don't know why I like him...but that's water under the bridge, I'm just trying to convince myself he isn't worth drowning for. :Flush:
Oh honey, I fell for him about 3 years ago. Moved in with him, moved out, let him move in. I don't know why I like him...but that's water under the bridge, I'm just trying to convince myself he isn't worth drowning for. :Flush:
Wait, are you sure you're not me?
I'm sorry that you are going through this. Trust me when I say I know exactly where you are coming from.
I'M NOT ALONE?!?!
I think I LOVE you, bbro! ;)
I'm just trying to convince myself he isn't worth drowning for. :Flush:
It appears that you have an extra word attached to the end of this statement.
:D
My daughter's hamster just died
The check engine lights in both vehicles came on within a week of each other. Totally different problems, each about $500 to fix.
I had some blood taken for testing last week and the doctor rang and said she wants to see me about them. Apparently there's something wrong with my liver.
Excellent. Next I'm going to have to stop drinking!
That's why I never let them test my blood :)
The check engine lights in both vehicles came on within a week of each other. Totally different problems, each about $500 to fix.
I can fix it for pennies. Just take a little strip of black electrical tape, adhere firmly to "check engine" light. Problem solved. :p
Wonderful. Turns out the $500 fix for the truck didn't actually fix it, and they can't figure out why. They're "looking into it."
ack Ali, that sucks:(
Upsetting me today is: I am tired, really really tired. Every part of me aches. I've pulled muscles I didn't know I had, I've fucked my lungs up (temporarily) shovelling fucking rubble and rotted floor covering, my skin isn't very happy either after days and days of dusty work. Have I mentioned I am tired?
Two weekends in a row, plus two frdays and two mondays and one Wednesday we've been clearing out the local party HQ building. Sale completed yesterday at 5pm....it had to be clear, like totaly clear and in a relatively clean state. By we, I mean me and D. Two of us have worked ourselves into the fucking ground on this, to get the party out from under a bloody big albatross just in time for the commercial sector to plummet. We got a few hours of help from a few people when they were able to: J did a bit, my mum helped go through a filing cabinet, a guy from the other constituency spent three hours lifting heavy furniture. But me and D were there throughout. Thirty years accumulated junk and furniture on four floors to deal with. Case files and party records to sort through into confidential waste, recycling and keeping. All furniture had to be either skipped, given away or brought down to one place for the recycling truck on monday morning.
The top floor is derelict: holes in the roof, plaster and rubble all over the floor, rotting lino and floor covering. We (D and I) swept it up and bagged it and got it to the tip. D organised collections of confidential waste, D organised the skip, D organised the recycling crusher van. All whilst working a full week around it and dealing with the solicitor for the sale of the building. I've been trying to keep up with uni work, spend whatever time I can down at the rooms, attend meetings etc etc...all whilst finding every movement painful because I have done something to my lower back and hips.
Last night at 5pm I felt about ready to collapse. Literally. Today I am dog tired and in two hours I have an important meeting to go to. I. Have. Had. Enough.
But...we did it. We got it sold in the teeth of obstructionist bastards. Got ourselves out from under a building that has so many holes and cracks it looks like it's about to sink into the ground any moment. A building we couldn't afford to keep because the party has no income stream (the building was no longer suitable for renting out for meetings, and no longer suitable [safe] for the MP to rent as her office). The bastards (faction) have tried to make it difficult, they like to gnaw on a bone. They wanted us to fail so they can beat us with that stick. Well they can fuck off we've done it :)
So you're one of those "working" politicians?
Well, I can't compete with DanaC.... wouldn't want to. Ugh.
But. I am upset at having been separated from my pocket knife today. I used it (somewhere... opening envelopes is my last clear memory) and now, it's not where it should be, in my pocket or in my hand. Dammit.
Buy a new one from Walmart. Guaranteed to make the old one turn up, then return the new one.
I didn't get to vote in the primaries because I'm newly registered to vote in my Chicago suburb county-----not at U of I in Urbana, IL!!!!!!!! DAMNNNNN
I'm tired , just fucking tired of irritating people , but every body seem to be eather irritated AT me , because of me , or just irritating in general .
That is all at this time .
I've lost my CV and will have to start it from scratch.
Fair enough - the Job Centre will go through it all with me when I see then (next week I think) but I was going to shoot off some crafty applications of my own to get my hand in.
Oh and if you don't know from the other threads I've moaned about it in, I have fruit coloured hair.
There you are...must go find other threads about fruit colored hair! :)
Tink is gone :(
Temporarily :)
My loss is Las Vegas' gain :eek:
Tink is gone :(
Temporarily :)
My loss is Las Vegas' gain :eek:
Well, better work harder on playing it right next time ;)
I was a flamingo pink once. (my hair) Not good and not cool. What a nightmare! That only works if you are an e-surance animation. I feel your pain sundae...I do.
I had to show up to work in a hat. Then I had to fight to keep it on.
If you aren't naturally red, just stay away from the red box. It's full of demons.
Mmm...I do recall one very bad hair accident when I was in my early twenties. I'd previously had henna-red hair which had seemingly pretty much grown out, then decided to go back to my preferred ash blonde...bleach based hair colour used on hair with henna. I ended up with swathes of orangey flame coloured hair mixed in with the ash blonde, wherever the henna was still present. I basically looked like a gonk.
Always remember, colour is your friend unless you want to look like a funeral director.
I'm still sick and I want to be at home in bed, but can't afford to miss another day of work :(
...My loss is Las Vegas' gain :eek:
Isn't that always the case with Las Vegas?
Isn't that always the case with Las Vegas?
No one really knows for sure, because what happens there, stays there.
That's not true; my friend's wife got pregnant in Las Vegas. They had to keep the baby.
Or misleading advertisements. :eek:
Unfair laws. :lol:
Or misleading advertisements. :eek:
Youse guys are still talking about HLJ's remark, aren't you?
I have thrush AND an UTI.
TMI?
deal with it
So you'll be making your acquaintance with the chemist then ducks? ;) Poor girlie. Hope you get it all cleared up nice and quickly.
I was a flamingo pink once. (my hair) Not good and not cool. What a nightmare! That only works if you are an e-surance animation. I feel your pain sundae...I do.
I had to show up to work in a hat. Then I had to fight to keep it on.
If you aren't naturally red, just stay away from the red box. It's full of demons.
I naturally have mousy brown hair, and dyed it dark auburn for years, until last year, when I said fuck it, and started letting the grey streaks come in
What a weekend. So a fan in the computer has been noisy for awhile, and finally started rattling too much to deal with.
Quick examination proved it to be the fan contained within the power supply. No problem: we run to Fry's, get a little $15 fan, and put it in. It does not spin. During the process of trying to figure out if it could really be dead right out of the box, we start moving bits and pieces about, connecting and disconnecting--and suddenly there's a little arc, and the computer goes off.
Turns out this is a rare breed of AC-powered fan, that looks exactly like its DC counterparts and is not clearly designated as such on the box at all. (When we eventually went back to Fry's to get the right fan, the salesguy argued with us that there was no such thing as an AC internal-component computer fan until we showed him the product right on his shelf.) Long story short, we fried the motherboard, and possibly more. We have now replaced it--hell of an expensive fan repair--but we can still only boot up into safemode, and our next move is to reinstall Windows. There's no reason to think this won't be the end of our problems, but cynicism has me by the throat at this point. (Did I mention the minivan's back in the shop? They really think they've figured it out for sure, this time.) Everything important is backed up--but it's backed up to a second drive within the same machine, so for all we know it got fried by Mr. Tiny Electrical Arc too. That'll teach me to procrastinate about getting the family photos printed for two years... :(
I would not attempt a fan replacement within the power supply.
So you replaced the motherboard with a different motherboard eh?
Yeah, actually I've now remembered we used an older one we had in the house because we couldn't find a decent AGP (I think that's right?) old-style motherboard for sale, and if we got a different kind we'd just have to buy a new video card and/or CPU... so it wasn't actually expensive to replace. But the other one's definitely fried-alicious, it goes into a neverending reboot cycle when it's hooked up.
Edit: I'm a poor relayer of information, not to mention way out of my league on the technology here. Mr. Clod, who was up working on it long after I went to bed last night, says it's behaving the same way with the new motherboard, so the new theory is the C: drive is what's damaged. Old motherboard is going back in, then Windows is getting reinstalled, possibly on a new drive. But I'm told the new power supply fan is working great! :rolleyes:
CF:
Timeout! Pls. I'm on another call here, but I *think* I can get you out of the Safemode ditch....
If you're interested, that is.
Sure, any suggestions are welcome. Just keep in mind I'm not the one actually doing any of it, and generally don't know what the hell I'm talking about. :)
Piles of work. I miss Vegas already!
BlackBerry Service Disrupted Across North America.
Now at last I have something to do in my copious free time.
**groan**
It's raining and I don't think they'll be delivering my new bookcase today.
Sure, any suggestions are welcome. Just keep in mind I'm not the one actually doing any of it, and generally don't know what the hell I'm talking about. :)
My day has been wall to wall grief.... sorry I haven't responded before this. Windows can be cranky when the default hard disk controller has changed. It may be that the configuration for the hard disk controller is still set up for the previous controller. It was probably integrated with the motherboard. Your goal (or Mr CF... whomever) will probably be to change it to the proper setting.
The setting is the same, but the controller was changed out from underneath the config (which is on the hard drive). The plan would be to use Device Manager, find the hd controller, then update the driver. **IF** it can find the actual controller, wonderful. Let it install that one.
If it can't, for whatever reason, then the idea would be to choose the GENERIC IDE CONTROLLER, then boot the system, hopefully in normal mode, not safe mode, then, in normal mode, try and update the driver again.
That you can boot in safemode is a very promising sign, and you should be able to recover from there. I'd be happy to help further, if this isn't enough.
Thanks, V. Mr. Clod's been in front of it all day, fortunately making progress. As it turns out, the problem ultimately seems to have been just with the boot drive, as he was able to boot into an existing Windows install on a different drive with both motherboards without a problem. At this point, all the pertinent data has been recovered over to the replacement drive, everything's running happily, and the old drive is just going to be trash--he did make an attempt to format it, but it started spewing errors and he decided he didn't need a piddly old 30-gig SCSI drive anyhow. :)
[truestory]
I found my razor after it had been missing for a few days.. minus the head and with a dead battery (it's the vibrating kind.. remember that)
I found it in the basement
It was a little wet
And kinda smelly
A female lives in our basement.....
[/truestory]
I'm buying a new one tomorrow after work :rolleyes: :yelsick:
Umm
Eww
but I have *heard* they work a treat.
1- Hide your new razor.
2- Offer your services to the cellar dwellar.
Order is optional.
I just smashed up the front of my car. :(
Well I'm glad to see you're well enough after that to still post here HM. Sorry about your car though. Do you have insurance?
Sorry to hear that, HM. Last night was fucking treacherous in DC. I saw a pedestrian being strapped to a back board after falling on the ice just a block outside the metro station. I almost fell about a half dozen times myself on the walk home from the metro, and I had to divert my normal route home to avoid a few dangerous street crossings where cars had virtually no control over themselves.
I'm assuming it was the ice that got you as well.
Not directly. I had just scraped off my car, and went from a standstill directly into a lamppost. I'm not certain why I didn't see it, probably the light from the lamp was illuminating the water streaks from the wipers, and the post itself blended into the night. If the weather hadn't been bad, it probably wouldn't have happened, but I didn't slip on the ice or anything like that.
[truestory]
I found my razor after it had been missing for a few days.. minus the head and with a dead battery (it's the vibrating kind.. remember that)
I found it in the basement
It was a little wet
And kinda smelly
A female lives in our basement.....
[/truestory]
I'm buying a new one tomorrow after work :rolleyes: :yelsick:
Err.... didn't you R-U-N-N-O-F-T to join the smokejumpers or something like that? You shaved your head to reduce your personal cranial fireload, etc? I feel confuseled.
Oh, your razor? ugh.
HM:
The Good news is you're ok.
Bad news is your poor car....
So sorry.
My Great Aunt Alice died on Sunday morning at 07.30.
Also I had intended to write a long(ish) post in her honour today, to remind myself why I loved her and to share some funny stories with you.
I've just found out that the library is closing at 17.00 instead of 17.30 and now I won't have time.
I will post more about her when I can though - she was a great woman and I loved her more than my Grandmother. The funeral will be next week sometime and I know I will find it hard to get through.
We went to see her in hospital on Friday, although it was only to show we cared as she was expected to be out within days. Mum said to me on the way there, "You do have something to wear to the funeral don't you, if and when it comes up?" Which really made me laugh at the time as she's spent most of my life trying to get me out of black. I said, "Mum! If anyone has black clothes it's me!" I had no idea I'd be wearing them so soon.
Alice Doyle RIP.
My condolences, SG. I have a very dear Aunt too. I'm sure you miss yours.
I'm sorry for your loss SG. If there's anything I can do let me know.
Also, I note your Aunts name is Doyle. My Nana's maiden name was Doyle. I wonder if somewhere down the line we could be related. Wouldn't that be a trip and a half.
My thoughts are with you my friend.
*Hugs SG* My condolences, never easy. Fill us in when you can, chuck.
Wow, lots of sadness in the thread... Very sorry to hear about your respective woes, HM and SG. :(
Too true Clod. Chins up everybody.
I'm going to try and keep all my chins up. ;)
(that was a little joke. I hope people can have a little laugh at my expense) (I'll put the bill in the mail)
This is pretty damned upsetting.
"The Coffee House reported in May about the North Pacific gyre becoming a dead zone for human plastic trash.
Another good writeup of why it's not "visible from space, for pete's sake! twice the size of Texas! Gimme a break" [/skeptic]
Because the media has completely misrepresented what it actually is. It is in no way an "island," nor is it floating. It is basically just dirty water, a soup of tiny bits of plastic.
The question, just like with global warming, is not whether it "really" exists but what it means. Is it a long-term danger? Is there realistically anything we can do about it?
In case anyone is interested, another
article about the central Pacific gyre by Captain Charles Moore Aboard Oceanographic Research Vessel, Alguita. Explains how this has happened, meteorologically.
Apparently they have done photography and spent time studying this...
"As we drifted in the center of this system, doing underwater photography day and night, we began to realize what was happening. A paper plate thrown overboard just stayed with us, there was no wind or current to move it away. This is where all those things that wash down rivers to the sea end up. On October 10, during our return trip to Santa Barbara, we discovered something never before documented -- a Langmuir Windrow of plastic debris. Circular ocean currents with contrary rotation create long lines of material, visible from above as streaks on the ocean. Normally these are formed by planktonic organisms or foam, but we discovered one made of plastic. Everything from huge hawsers to tiny fragments were formed into a miles long line. "
Interesting read...
To cut a long story short:
My grandmother is dying.
She can't come to my wedding.
My dad is trying to take care of her and make her as comfortable as possible.
As a result, he may not be able to come to the wedding, either.
The wedding is 3 weeks away.
I am currently curled up in the university library crying my eyes out.
And I can't skip class tonight.
I'm so sorry, Chocolatl. How far away does your grandmother live?
She is currently about four hours away, at my dad's house in South Florida. I got to see her last weekend when she was in a hospital about an hour away from here, but my dad says she's gone "downhill" since then, so they sent her home with him.
I'm sorry about your situation Choco. I guess you have some tough choices coming up maybe.
My thoughts will be with you and kits.
There's a crack in the hull of our boat. It's going to cost anywhere up to or even over $5k to fix.
The surveyor who checked the boat prior to our purchase is going to be recieving a very nasty letter from our solicitor.
If it's anything like a "home inspector"
...all they have to do is put some language in to cover their ass, and basically they aren't even allowed to tell you anything bad.
Our solicitor has looked over the paperwork and he thinks we have a pretty strong case for the cost of the repairs at least, which is all we really want, so hopefully they'll realize they're at fault and simply ask us to send them the bill rather than having to spend a day in court, which we will do if necessary.
boooohhhhhhooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
My job search has not been going well, and I hate my current job. I currently feel like I wasted 18 months of my life and $20,000 of your money (via student loans) to get my Masters.
Did I mention that my cardiomyopathy has gotten worse?
Don't mind me...I'm just feeling sorry for myself for a minute...I haven't had a moment like that in a while. Carry on...
boooohhhhhhooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
waaaaaaannnnnnnnnkkkkkkkkkkeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrr
I wish a dingo would eat you, wanker.
I can't find my coffee cup.
:rar:
ummmm...wankerrrrrr. that sounds good, I"ll have that
if wishes were ho'ses
Hmm. I guess it's true: you are what you eat.
... like I wasted 18 months of my life and $20,000 of your money (via student loans) to get my Masters...
I am upset that the above isn't true for me...they are coming after me, now. *sigh* it could be worse.
Sorry for your news Chocolatl.
Copper bottom and then paint the bastard. Unleaded of course. Just pull the sonbitch out of the water every winter and scrub clean and paint when the amb.-temp is above 0' centrigrade. Almighty work I know but there you go. More than a few winter Saturdays and Sundays for you both. Take a picnic and scrub like ä Tasmainian Devil. You think somebody will do it for you?
Yes someone will do it for us. lol Especially if we pay them. ;)
We can't repair the damage ourselves because the boat is fibreglass and the tools and equipment would cost us more than it'd be worth, aside from the fact that we want it done properly.
I'd rather leave the important stuff to the professionals. :)
Just for you, here is a trade secret: take your boat to your local coachworkers garage: they have all the sprays and paint in the world and normally they touch up cars, vans and trucks but they can do boats and yachts just as well. If you know a good coachwork factory near you with a yearning for work they can do just a good a job as a chandler but without the certificate. Check you navigation insurance just to be sure. Car garages have fibreglass sprays and kilns to create perfect coachwork repairs. It's done here in Switzerland regularly why not in Oz? Just trying to be be helpful Ali.
Side note: icileparadise, I just noticed that your username is not icicleparadise
It's French (dreaded) which is my second language, it tranlates as: here is paradise. Which it is.
Yes, but wouldn't icicle paradise be just as fitting?
Yes, but wouldn't iciclejust as fitting?
I am stupid but I don't get your point. Maybe I am pretty stupid but ici means here and paradise means happy (in this country) so why the semantics? ICILEPARADISE. Fair game for me. You question this?
Rather you quiz my intellect and I am up for the challenge: are you?
whoah there, Tiger. I think you're getting a little carried away with yourself there.
Now you've pointed it out it's obvious that the name is actually ici le paradise, with the spaces removed.....personally I have to mentally correct myself whenever I read it, my brain wants it to read icicle paradise because that makes some kind of sense in my language, where 'icile paradise' does not. Because French is not a language I in anyway think in, it never even occurred to me to see 'ici' and 'le' as separate.
In what way did HLJ question your intelligence?
good point, but if french is not your first language for me it is not ( actuaully it is my third: English, German and French) Icileparadise is all one word. And if you dismay me for having chosing it as my avator, here is the explanation: ICILEPARADISE. you can abrebriviate the ICI if you wish but the whole is my tag. My name is Anthony and you can tag me as Toni if you want. I do not care.
Not only is French not my first language it isn't my second either. I am only fluent in English. I have very, very, mostly forgotten schoolgirl french at best and a little German from years ago.
I'm not suggesting that icileparadise doesn't work as a single moniker. That's your tag and that's fine. I'm saying that it isn't immediately obvious that the 'ici' means here and the 'le' is attached to 'paradise' (e.g le paradise). My mind automatically breaks that word into two sections: icile and paradise.
So....are you saying English is your first language?
Nudge nudge- Swiss Mountains..nudge.
:)
Just guessing here.
@ Cic
but if french is not your first language for me it is not ( actuaully it is my third: English, German and French)
That order suggests that English is his first language....but he doesn't in any way sound like someone whose first language is English:P
That's why I said I was guessing Dana!
:p
I'll make a more specific guess. Swiss-German? First language?
(better than me, English is my first language and I really don't have it right)
Oh I'm guessing Swiss-German for first language, I just wondered with the order in which he put his languages that's all.
Rather you quiz my intellect and I am up for the challenge: are you?
Hey...ic...chill out! Quit being so defensive!!!
This is frikin' hilarious!!!
:p
Yes, but wouldn't icicle paradise be just as fitting?
I am stupid but I don't get your point. Maybe I am pretty stupid but ici means here and paradise means happy (in this country) so why the semantics? ICILEPARADISE. Fair game for me. You question this?
Rather you quiz my intellect and I am up for the challenge: are you?
Slow down, honey. I think he's referring to the snow etc. we commonly associate with the Swiss alps. Nothing to do with semantics. He's suggesting that not only is it paradise where you live, but maybe
also an icicle paradise right now. It being winter and all. At least that's my interpretation.
Icicle Paradise does make sense to an native English speaker for someone living in Switzerland, so it is not an unnatural mistake for us to make when reading quickly. No-one is accusing you of any error at all.
I am stupid but I don't get your point. Maybe I am pretty stupid but ici means here and paradise means happy (in this country) so why the semantics? ICILEPARADISE. Fair game for me. You question this?
Rather you quiz my intellect and I am up for the challenge: are you?
Anthony, your English is quite fine. I was not questioning your intelligence.
[COLOR=Black]
[/COLOR][COLOR=White]P.S. I feel like I walked into a scene from Monty Python and the Holy Grail.
I'm French. Why do you think I have this outrageous accent, you silly king?
You don't frighten us, English pig dogs. Go and boil your bottoms, you sons of a silly person. I blow my nose at you, so-called "Arthur King," you and all your silly English K-nig-hts
[/COLOR]
That's okay Hung. No need to for me to get emotional, I think your'e reading it like icicle which it is not. Read it like: easylerparadee = icileparadise.
It's French (dreaded) which is my second language, it tranlates as: here is paradise. Which it is.
Perhaps there was some confusion stemming from your apparent use of Frenglish: the words "ici" and "le" are French while the word "paradise" is English (it's "
paradis" [sans "e"] in French). This may have led people to look for a corresponding English meaning to "icile" [possibly by way of a typo in which icicle could become icile].
Voici le paradis (here is paradise) would have been my first choice.
Le paradis est ici (paradise is here) seems to be what your nickname is base upon:
ici, le paradis (here, paradise), without the verb
est (is), perhaps functions as an idiomatic expression.
"
Icileparadise" entails some artistic license with your nick; so, it's not surprising that others would take some license with their interpretation of it. :)
I think your'e reading it like icicle which it is not. Read it like: easylerparadee = icileparadise.
yebbut, yebbut..... he's doing it
deliberately. Playing with words. We get (=understand)
ici le paradise. really. we do. But we get icicle paradise too. It started out as a reading error and ended up as an interesting concept.
I did want to keep a low profile here and I guess icileparadise is foreign to most non french speakers and I now get the icicle thing but in french icileparadis works - it's a selling thing like on a market stall: here is a good thing. I will change it if it's such a problem. I am English born so you know. French language is so romantic however, and icileparadise is like a holy grail, in it's own way. I am pleased and impressed that so many of you discussed my posts and helped me to experience this wynderful opportunity to speak to all people of all nations in our world.our posts have been very welcomed by me. Well done you cellar dwellers. We all benefit from all our own life experiences and sharing. Thank you.
icileparadise, I think it's a good user name and hope you don't change it. I changed mine once, but eventually came back to the original.
icileparadise, just so you know : once something starts getting discussed we have a tendency to pick it apart and go off on our own little drift with it. That's just the way we are, it doesn't necessarily mean we are taking exception to something if we start picking it apart :P
icileparadise, I think it's a good user name and hope you don't change it. I changed mine once, but eventually came back to the original.
Yes, this upsets me. terribly.
A poorly dog. Pilau has a big lump on his neck which the vet is assuming (hoping) is a cyst under the skin that's got infected. He's running a temperature of 104 (should be 101) and is feeling very sorry for himself.
He's been off-colour for a few days, but I hadn't connected it with the little lump I'd noticed on his neck earlier in the week (he sometimes gets them and then they go) I knew something was up with him, wasn't his usual self. Then today I got back home and whereas normally he's at the door by the time I've finished unlocking it, this time I went in and no sign of him. I thought maybe mum had picked him up on her way home from work thinking I was going to be late back or something...just as I was thinking this he appeared from upstairs, a little subdued but happy to see me.
I gave him a biscuit, put in on the floor in front of him and he just sniffed it and looked at me. So I knew there was definately something amiss. I ruffled the fur on his neck and the little lump was now a massive swelling. I don't even know if the swelling was already there and I just hadn't noticed it because of the area it covered ... like it was so wide and gradual it almost didn't register as a lump. For all I know it's been there for ages and I just didn't notice it because up until a few days ago he had his thick winter coat. I cut all his fur off a few days ago. It's a weird swelling, hard to the touch too.
So, straight away made a vets appointment and booked a taxi and an hour later he was suffering the indignities of a thermometer and two injections. Poor little bugger. He's not at all well. Got to take him back after a week's course of anti-biotics and hope that the lump has gone down...i don;t even want to consider the possibilty that it won't, because that would mean it isn;t a cyst...
He's been restless and unable to settle for much of the evening. Occasionally grumbles or whimpers. Sat wth him on the couch for about an hour stroking him til he went to sleep for awhile. Seems to have perked up a little now though and managed to eat a little food. Apparently he's likely to feel really rotten for at least 48 hours whilst the 1st lot of drugs bring his temperature down and fight the infection.
I can't say I am overly concerned about the £58 it cost at the vets. They were really good with him.
oh...poor Pilau! Is it swelling do to an allergy? He sounds so sick..oh!
Don't think it's an allergy. It's too hard. Also, when I found the little lump earlier it looked like it had bled a little. Not unusual, he occasionally gets *thinks* herbatious? cysts can't remember what the word is now, but they're under the skin. They come and go and once or twice in his life they've been infected and had to be removed (like lancing an abcess). But the size of the swelling is a little shocking. It's basically the entire side of his neck. Which is why I am wondering if it was actually already like that and the 'little lump' was actually just a peak of that.
I hope it all works out ok for your puppy dog Dana. Try not to worry too much. As they get older, dogs are suseptible(sp?) to stuff like that. My dog Sheba is getting lots of cysts as she gets older. The first one I thought was a tic, but then found it wouldn't come off. Now she has several of them, but they're not harmful.
Anyway, that was a bit of a tangent.
Good luck for Pilau. I'll get my puppies to pray to the puppy god for him ok?
*chuckles* thanks Ali, I am sure that'll help :P
Like I say he's had cysts before. From being quite young actually. What's worrying me atthe moment (apart from it feeling different to the usual ones) is the temperature. I know he'll be fine and the stuff the vet gave him will bring it down, probably already is doing....but 104 is very high. If a human had a temperature hike like that it'd be a hospital job. Dogs are pretty hardy creatures but I am sure glad I took him straight away. Otherwise it could have been a four in the morning job with a dog having fever spike seizures.....doesn't bear thinking about really.
Don't think it's an allergy. It's too hard. Also, when I found the little lump earlier it looked like it had bled a little. Not unusual, he occasionally gets *thinks* herbatious? cysts can't remember what the word is now, but they're under the skin. They come and go and once or twice in his life they've been infected and had to be removed (like lancing an abcess). But the size of the swelling is a little shocking. It's basically the entire side of his neck. Which is why I am wondering if it was actually already like that and the 'little lump' was actually just a peak of that.
Its "sebacious". I occasionally get them under my arm, probably from shaving, and they take a couple of weeks to go away without seeing a doctor. Just for grossness' sake, I was talking to someone once who said she gets them the size of a golf ball :greenface
Thankyou! I've been mishearing that word for years :P
Actually I also get them under my arm, very occasionally. Once had one that turned into an abcess. Not fun.
Update on Pilau:
Having eaten a little food, he's now decided to chew his rope-bone so...must be feeling a bit better.
Good news! I'm sure he'll be fine
[SIZE="1"]Woof[/SIZE]
Sounds good, buddy... glad you're feeling better.
[SIZE="1"]Woof[/SIZE]
Well, then, I guess it's time for another Pilau poem.
Pilau's feeling poorly
Poor Pilau has a cyst
Add to that a fever
I think you get the gist
But Pilau has a fan club
That stretches far and wide
So let's all cheer for Pilau and
Let him know we're on his side.
Hope he feels much better soon, DanaC. :)
Yes, this upsets me. terribly.
lookout, I didn't realize. I well get it changed immediately.
Well, maybe after lunch.
I hope Pilau is better soon! :apaw:
poor baby!
Everybody's sweetheart. I'm going to go look at his photos. :)
I heart Pilau. He's the leader in my 2 member gang. (me and Pilau) Dana can join if she wants.
:)
i forgot my ipod today and i'm going into convulsions if i hear one more kenny G scale. i mean song.
:notworthy:
that's how I feel about the kenny g-spot.
I deliver to this seniors/disabled folks high-rise at least twice a week...I have at least 2 or 3 regulars that order from the shop once a week. The lady that I deliver to on Friday mentioned today that the Meals on Wheels program that comes to her building didn't come today, due to the sleet and snow we got yesterday.
Hearing that made me sad...the high-rise is a fucking dump, and that means quite a few people with not a lot of dough didn't get a good meal today.
Update: my grandmother passed away, this morning.
I'm heartbroken, but at least I know she isn't suffering anymore.
Thanks to everyone who has been sending positive energies and good wishes to me and my family.
hugs and prayers to you and your family
On the up side, Chocolatl, now your sure Grannie will definitely be with you when you get married. On the down side, she'll be watching your honeymoon too.;)
Compassionate or whiners?
Or bit of both. I often post sympathy and I also whine a lot.
I will however refrain from posting in this thread again, since it apparently tags me for judgement.
Chocolatl, my condolences. Horrible timing, but as you say, at least she is no longer suffering. *hugs*
Or bit of both. I often post sympathy and I also whine a lot.
I will however refrain from posting in this thread again, since it apparently tags me for judgement.
Chocolatl, my condolences. Horrible timing, but as you say, at least she is no longer suffering. *hugs*
It's just LJ being LJ on the innernets, Dana. Ignore him if he bugs you (I know you know that).
I hope Pilau is on the mend?
*smiles* thanks Limey. I am a little touchy at the moment (in middle of another political firefight, or rather a continuation of the faction war :P) Pilau is definately getting better. I was worried yesterday when his neck started to bleed profusely and looked like a raw mass, so took him back to the vets (he was less than pleased by that development) who said it's a good sign, the cyst is definately a cyst and nothing more sinister, as it's now burst. He now has a shaved patch on his neck so the size of the swelling is visible....it's fucking huge! and a hole in his neck which I am reliably informed will heal once all the 'material':greenface has come out. The skin is deeply brujised from the pressure of the swelling, but the vet gave him some painkillers and even stronger anti-inflammatories. Temperature is now down to 102 (yey) and he is starting to act more like Pilau again....like begging for food and taking an inordinate amount of interest in the biscuit cupboard :D
This really should go in the what's making you happy thread, but it always seems better to feed back here :P
Well I'm #5 on the list and I barely remember posting here. :lol: Of course some people are so self-important the just start a new thread of their own when they want to whine... :p
Maybe the conclusion is...Those are the top people that actually give a rats ass? You know- The top nice people.
You know...
The ones that have consistently kept me from hurting other people for the greater good of society (unbeknownst to their oh so kind souls). Or the ones who are just generally helpful. The top people that don't like it when others are upset. And hope to golly they have a good answer.
:)
Yes LJ, I have jumped to a conclusion..but I don't know what you were thinking or what conclusions you thought could/ should be made, and I sure as hell know, you don't know what conclusion I ultimately made. The above statements of mine are pretty close.
Eduardo, one of my favorite players had his career ended today by a complete shit dirty tackle. He had the defender beat, so he was hacked down. To say that this tackle was anything other than an attempt to take a player out is utter nonsense. He'll be lucky if he can even run in a year, let alone play. The rest of the photos are too gruesome to post.
Was it at least called foul by the ref?
Oh that's fucking awful. The lad's leg was broken by that tackle. I don't think anybody believes it was anything other than a dirty tackle though Lookout, the offending player got the red card. Sometimes I think there should be room for something more severe though, like a six month ban or something. That was an appalling foul.
Ouch. I am all too familiar with Selly Oak Hospital. Double Ouch. :lol:
Nah, it's not that bad really, just surprised me he was taken there. I guess it's effectively a uni hospital, though.
Yeah I saw that on telly. It looked nasty.
Oh and yeah I've been whining quite a bit lately. Life is on the up and up now though, so hopefully I'll spend less time here other than to wish others well.
Choco, I'm sorry about your grandma. Don't let it put a dark cloud on your wedding though. Try and stay positive, and remember, we're all here if you need a chat. It sucks dogs balls, but you're going to get through it. *hugs*
It figures that a man would think a woman had gotten laid if she was happy. lol
Eduardo, one of my favorite players had his career ended today by a complete shit dirty tackle.
I just chose not to click that vid on youtube. Terrible thing.
today is eduardo's 25th birthday. happy frickin' birthday.
How common, or uncommon if you wish, is this in soccer?
dipshit tackles are pretty common. but those are usually the "came in late", "stuck the foot in too long" kind. The "i'm not going to go for the ball on my way to your shin" are pretty rare though. injuries like this happen once every few years.
Are there likely to be reprisals on the dirty player?
I saw the Video from this , and some stills , NASTY !!!!
yeah. could be either compassion or venting. regardless......there's an attraction to the thread for some more than others. not judging you. just stirring the poo.
love me a little bit.
lj me love you long time.
me love lj for long time, too.
and for five dollah.
Eduardo tackle was dangerous, not malicious -telegraph.co.uk
Only those with the flintiest of hearts would not have allowed Arsenal some outpouring of frustration at the end.
Complete BS article by an asshat journalist. dangerous? going into a tackle your foot can slip a bit high, and you might clip the other player - that would be dangerous. But if you are playing the ball your toes are extended. You can't win the ball with the bottom of your foot. Taylor went into the tackle with his foot higher than the ball, both feet off the ground (no chance of pulling out of a challenge) and his foot flexed with only cleats showing. Malicious all day. That and the fucker actually laughed after he saw the result.
Warriors like Joey Barton
But all that really needs to be said about the author is this quote. If he thinks Joey Barton is a warrior, then he is a fool. He is known more for cheap shots and being arrested for assault than any skill he might have.
A little thing called context:
[SIZE="1"]There are some others in the game, individuals with a violent streak, who would launch themselves at opponents in a crude attempt to stop them.
...
Saturday's dreadful accident must encourage all professionals who have been guilty of spiteful challenges...to see the error of their ways.
...
Restraint is required. [/SIZE]Warriors like Joey Barton[SIZE="1"]...should think before they dive in.[/SIZE]
i read it and i understand the context. putting "warrior" and "joey barton" just doesn't work. If you ever watched Barton play you'd understand that warrior should be replaced with brainless thug. This is the problem in the english game right now. You've got a bunch of media hacks telling people what is right and what is wrong. They talk about "english grit" when describing dirty tackles made by Barton, Savage, etc. and they exalt the dirty play of their legend Roy Keane. The young players come out and try to duplicate what this style of play and injuries are inevitable. They describe injuries as unlucky rather than what they are - the obvious and inevitable result of letting dangerous tackles go unpunished. eh, whatever.
Yeah, my interest in this extends only as far as my name was mentioned in the article.
As far as what you're saying about dangerous tackles, that appears to be exactly what the author of the article was saying. And he noted Barton as an example of what is wrong with the game. I can't imagine that he meant "warrior" (or "violent" or "crude" or "spiteful") as a compliment.
I can't imagine that he meant "warrior" as a compliment.
Yeah, that could be it. I hear "warrior" used as a compliment to some of the rough and tumble "hard men" of english football like John Terry who the media adores, so I may have just been reading the guy wrong.
I will say that society has a precedent of treating someone who behaves dangrously enough as malicious, IE a drunk driver:
stupid, dangerous, not meaning to cause harm, yet putting himself in a situation where harm is cause due to his actions.
Daughter No. 2 has left her husband. This is the third serious relationship she's had, and left but as much as this sucks, she did the right thing, after hearing her side of the story.
Family is devastated, because this child just cannot get a break, and we so were hoping she'd found someone good. Now she's on her own, with no home, no vehicle, and two small children. Not to mention a thousand or so miles away.
:(
I'm upset because I just took a test that I know was designed to make students get answers wrong with the bullshit answers such as:
a)
b)
c) a & b
d) all of the above
e) none of the above
My grades this semester are not going to be as good as the past 3 semesters :(
c) and d) would be the same, unless d) specifically meant a) + b) simultaneously...so c) would be a) and b) in separate instances...
was this a semantics test?!
linked to source
Cloud, I'm sorry about your daughter. Can she come home to you? Does she have a support network where she is?
Cloud, you have my sympathy. What a worrying time for you, especially given she's so far away. Not being a parent myself, I can only really imagine how difficult it must be to know one of your kids is distressed and having problems.
If she's no home, then is there a possibility of her moving near to you and starting again over there?
she can come home to us--she knows that, and it's made expressly clear to her--but she doesn't want to. It may come to that, but she likes the area of the country she's in.
and thanks very much for responding. I know there's nothing you guys can do but listen.
and thanks very much for responding. I know there's nothing you guys can do but listen.
Oh well, we're also giving Jimbo something to giggle about in his own time. ;)
Besides that, it's a suckful situation Cloud. Sounds like she knows what she wants for now, but we've probably all made less than great decisions following a breakup I'm sure.
Do you think she's holding out hope of a reconcilliation and that's why she's staying put?
no, she just thinks El Paso is a sucky town. :)
I'm just so sad and sick about this. Her husband keeps calling me--I don't know what to say to the guy.
Update: my grandmother passed away, this morning.
I'm heartbroken, but at least I know she isn't suffering anymore.
Thanks to everyone who has been sending positive energies and good wishes to me and my family.
Sorry for your loss. My MIL died on Sat just short of 8 weeks after falling in her home. Her suffering as is your grandmothers now over. The circle goes around.
I'm sorry, Merc. Died after falling--were the two related?
(everybody go do some balance training!)
I'm sorry, Merc. Died after falling--were the two related?
(everybody go do some balance training!)
She was 74 and for some reason getting really batty. We were in the process of selling her home and moving her to an assisted living facility the following month. She was complaining of lots of back and hip pain, being followed by an ortho doc and chiropractor. Xmas day she fell and broke her hip and her upper arm. When the took her to surgery they discovered that the fractures were pathologic (caused by disease, tumor). After a chest CT they found extensive bone, lung (primary), and lymph cancer. She was discharged to a total care nursing home after 12 days in the hospital and died after six weeks in the home. Pretty wild ride from driving herself everywhere before Thanksgiving to getting batty and not being able to do anything by Xmas, then the fall, and now gone. Needless to say my wife has been over to her house, the hospital, and home nearly everyday since this started. I hate to say it but I wish she had gone sooner, she would have suffered less. The nursing home did really great with her. Wonderful care. They kept her really comfortable towards the end.
Cloud, I hope your daughter finds her strength. If she's anything like her mom she's got plenty of it!
Chocolatl and Merc, so sorry to hear of your losses. I just found out today that my 95 year old grandmother is going into a home. They tried for a very long time to keep her in her home, but even with 24 hour nursing care it just wasn't good for her. Twice she crawled out of her bedroom window because she was afraid of the nurse. I don't know how she did it, except the windows are really low, and she went over to the neighbors (lifelong friends of hers) in her nightgown. It is sad, though, that she can't spend her remaining days in her own home. For the longest time you couldn't stop the woman, then, age came in and stopped her quite suddenly.
My dad and aunt and uncle are looking for a home today. I know she will get great care, and perhaps she'll crack the staff up with her dry sense of humor a time or two.
Shawnee, be sure that your dad asks around for a good place. They vary on the scale of good to very poor. Nothing is perfect but some are much better than others. We had both Hospice people and some Social workers recommend the one we finally put her in.
Thanks, Merc. I think they got some leads, and my mom was very impressed with a place her aunt was in. My mom also worked at the hospital for years and now runs the immunization clinic so knows a few in the know.
My grandmother and my grandfather were married 55 years when he passed away in the mid 80s. They were always very close and in love. I hope that there is something else out there and they can be together again.
OK, I just want to say this, and nothing else: there sure are a lot of dumbasses out there. Not here! Here! I mean, not in the Cellar, I mean in this immediate vicinity.
That is all.
Shawnee is that related to the problem with your grandma?
Oh, no. That was a work-related vent. Just something to do with a studlent. :blush:
ah ok :) thought you guys had maybe run up against a brick wall already :P
Good luck finding your gran a good place to be. I'm sure you'll find somewhere nice.
A studlent? Is that a catholic student?
lol...it's a small-minded student. I did that on porpoise. I don't know why! :lol:
Too bad ZenGum isn't around to pun with you.
I was just thinking I miss the Gumster.
Merc, I'm sorry about your MIL, but as you say, when it gets that bad, sometimes swift is best. It was only 5 months between diagnosis and death for my mum and that seemed fast. I can only imagine how much your wifes head is reeling after this time.
My thoughts will be with you both.
And once again, I try to accomplish the smallest thing and it blows up in my face:
We have a lot of dead shrubs and overgrowth in the back corner of our yard. I actually got up the motivation over the weekend to drag my ass out there and cut back a little of it. One of the things I cleared out was this long-dead thick climbing thing that grew up along the fence (it used to go over the top, but the neighbor had cut off his side long ago.)
Turns out those stupid dead branches were the only thing holding the fence up! Now there's a huge section of fence that's fallen down into my neighbor's yard. I'd have left the damn thing alone if I'd known it was structural.
Gardening accidents! Don't they suck?
Can't you just prop the fence back up or reseat the posts? What sort of fence is it?
Oh yes, it definitely isn't a feat of engineering to fix, just reseating the loose post and possibly replacing a crossbeam or two... but it will A.) need to be done by Mr. Clod, who already has too many honeydew tasks on his plate, and B.) may encourage the neighbor to bring up replacing the whole fence altogether--which it really does need, in all honesty, but we have far more important uses for the money right now.
LOL! that's why I try to avoid cleaning. anything. who's to know when it's the dust and dirt that's holding everything together?
Merc, I'm sorry about your MIL, but as you say, when it gets that bad, sometimes swift is best. It was only 5 months between diagnosis and death for my mum and that seemed fast. I can only imagine how much your wifes head is reeling after this time.
My thoughts will be with you both.
Thanks Ali. She said that she feels like the world on Atlas's back is finally rolling off.
God, Merc, I just read back through the thread, I hadn't seen your entry. My condolences to you and our wife. What a shocking way for things to go, so fast from well to the end.
Thanks Dana, life throws you curve balls everynow and again, sometimes they hit you in the head.
I know...and sometimes they hit you right in the solar plexis.
I have tube-burn on my inner arms.
well use more
Lube Monnie !!!
;)
i'mtrying a new high protein diet to bulk my skinny white ass up a little bit and ive had the runs for like 3 days,
:mad2:
Ouch. Are you doing this with medical/dietary advice Timo, or are you just going it alone? If going it alone, might be worth a GP's visit just to make sure you're doing it safely.
well yes and no,
I have a friend who's really into this kind of thing, hes been doing it for about a year and recomended it to me, i'll probrably ask him...
failing that i'll see my GP,
cheers for the concern though Dana!
Merc, best wishes to you and especially your wife and family. I feel a little relieved, to be honest, because it's like we can all breathe again, so I understand what you mean about wishing she had "gone earlier." I spent weeks dreading every single phone call I got, because each time I just knew that it was going to be The Call. Of course I miss her a lot, but I know it's a big relief for my dad, because he doesn't have to be at her side watching her suffer. I imagine it's much the same for your wife.
Shawnee, good luck for your grandma! My grandmother's aunt (my great grand aunt, I guess?) was moved to a home a few months ago because her Alzheimer's had gotten really bad. She kept leaving the house in the middle of the night claiming that there was a man outside waiting to take her back to Cuba. (She hasn't been in Cuba for at least 50 years.) Even after changing the locks, it was hard to keep her from wandering around. So it was in her best interest of her health and safety to move her. Hopefully your family is able to find a comfortable, safe place for your grandma.
Turns out those stupid dead branches were the only thing holding the fence up! Now there's a huge section of fence that's fallen down into my neighbor's yard. I'd have left the damn thing alone if I'd known it was structural.
Sounds like most of the projects I do around my place. Especially plumbing. The simple act of turning the water off to the pipes to make the fix often causes more problems than the fix will fix. All the sediment in the pipes gets stirred up and flushed into the guts of all the fixtures, and then they all stop working.
Merc, best wishes to you and especially your wife and family. I feel a little relieved, to be honest, because it's like we can all breathe again, so I understand what you mean about wishing she had "gone earlier." I spent weeks dreading every single phone call I got, because each time I just knew that it was going to be The Call. Of course I miss her a lot, but I know it's a big relief for my dad, because he doesn't have to be at her side watching her suffer. I imagine it's much the same for your wife.
Thanks Choc, yes we can relate to all those same feelings. Every phone call was like a stab with a knife. Esp if the Caller Id said it was the nsg home. One night they called real late and I didn't wake my wife up since she has not had good sleep since this all started at Christmas. It was just a status report. Not good, but really no change. When my wife say the Caller ID the next day she about had a panic attack. Since I was at work she could not get immediately ahold of me and freaked even more. After I got her to see my logic in not waking her up and that nothing had changed she calmed down but it was like 2 hours of hell for her til we talked. Thank God(s) it is over and we can all breathe again. Thanks for the thoughts again, all.
Sounds rough Merc. sorry dude.
Never easy to loose a loved one ,
Condolences to both Choc and Merc
Merc, Choc,
Take care of yourselves. I'm joining the club here, my thoughts are with you and yours.
Merc, Choc,
Take care of yourselves. I'm joining the club here, my thoughts are with you and yours.
Hang in there Shina. Just keep your commo lines open with those closest to you and things will work out.
Wal-Mart!!!!!!!:censored: :censored:
Two phone calls in two days from my accountant's office. Neither of them from my accountant. I called last week inquiring as to when I should come in and sign.
First Call: Hey Lookout - do you know you didn't pay any of your quarterlies last year?
Even though I faxed over my payroll sheets everytime I paid myself, they apparently received NONE of them and didn't think it was strange. So from August through December I didn't pay anything to the government and because of that, my corporation didn't issue a W2, which will now create a penalty situation.
Anger barely held in check.
Second Call: Hey Lookout - we just got a letter that your corporation is about to be dissolved.
Apparently they didn't publish my articles last year. It can be fixed after paying another penalty. I paid them to do it, they say that they don't do it. Grrrr! I'd have had my attorney do it, if they weren't going to do the whole freaking job! And then they lay their failures at my feet and pretend it was all me.
I'm so freaking angry that I'm going the hard route to fix the problems through another accountant because I don't ever want to speak with them again. I'd probably kill someone if I saw them right now. Or I'd collapse into a frustrated sobbing ball of frayed nerves. One or the other.
Depending on other people to be competent enough to do their jobs is an exercise in futility.
Does anyone else ever just stop and look at life around them and think "why can't I win, just once?" I'm a decent guy, why the fuck does Mr Murphy apply his law to me at every fucking chance?
lookout---I know this seems so hard, it IS hard and you DON'T deserve it and yes, people are incompetant asshats most of the time who should be shot on sight. I feel for you. *cyberhug* deep breaths and maybe a shot of something.
Thanks Bri. Of course, I feel like a pretty big ass getting sympathy from someone who is dealing with a real problem;) , but thanks. I appreciate it.
Bri's right, it is lousy and you don't deserve it. Rotten luck to have incompetant dumbasses taking your money and not doing the job.
I feel a bit better about my reason for complaint now - I've just got an evil case of the farts. It doesn't cost me a penny.
We all have trials and it does me good to know that. Though I don't wish bad on anyone it makes me realize that even people who might seem to me to have it all go through stuff I know nothing about.
Keep your chin up, cousin! :)
lol @ SG
lookout--everyone's problem is real. I'm more worried about an email I sent rather than my medical condition! if nothing else, life is funny (both funny ha-ha and funny 'weird'). Money problems suck right up there with car, plumbing and computer woes. fire the bums!
They are fired, I'm just being spineless about it. I'm concerned about telling them off too badly and making it worse, because *drumroll* MOST of my clients use their firm! Because I sent them there. Yep.
I've been sending the majority of my referral business there for years now. I've also received a lot of referrals from there. My business is so interconnected that if I pour fuel on the fire it has the potential to become very damaging to me.
Ugghh - bite your tongue, breathe deep and make the best of it. You yourself know that paying to correct someone else's incompetence from time to time is unfortunately a cost of doing business. It shouldn't be, but it is. Hang tight Bro - good luck.
I was going to suggest posting their name in the thread so any future internet searches would bring up your complaints, but if you think they'll figure out it's you then I guess that wouldn't be the best idea, since you don't want to burn bridges.
I've spent my day on permahold with the state and city corporation commissions, accountants, and my attorney. Maybe I should just thank the useless fucks for giving me all this time to be in the cellar.:rolleyes:
No, as much as I'd like to burn her practice down it would damage me just as much as her so no dice. Quietly taking my lumps and being the nice guy feels crappy, but it will cause fewer disruptions with my clients. Truth is, I'll probably still lose some clients over this, because I am 100% done dealing with that firm and this happens to be tax season so the clients will have more direct contact with the accountants than they will with me. I'm sure the accountant already warmed up to another advisor to share referrals. Next week after I get this mess straightened out I'll really have to go out and interview some new firms for client placement.
Youre such a good guy lookout, can I clone you and have one for myself?
Upsetting me.....its amusing...to everyone BUT me.
One of our sales guys wanted to buy my whipper snipper, so I called in at the old house to get it...shoved it in the back of the SUV and on I went to work.
Just got onto the highway, when this dirty big hairy fucking huntsmen spider comes running at me from the passenger seat!!!! (he must of been in the whipper snipper)
Now, a few of you will know I am not overly bothered by spiders, particularly Hunstmen....but this bastard had a mission and he was really hyperactive and jumpy.
Jam on breaks, throw car into park and dive out the door onto the highway, all the while shrieking like a mad women and waving hands around.
Two lovely guys stopped to see what was wrong, and turns out they were more scared of hairy than I was....especially when he seemed to be mocking us on my headrest by waving his little furry legs around over his beady eyes and dancing a jig.
I finally regain some composure, grab a stick to try and chase him out...he's a really nimble bastard and escapes up under the dash.
After another 10 minutes standing on the side of the road, I decide I have to get to work at some stage, and risk driving.
Get to work, dive out of car, run for fly spray and bombed the car.
R.I.P Harry Hunstmen.
Did it look anything like this?
Yesssss....furry fucking bastard.
I live with them all the time, and generally they dont bother me...but in an enclosed area.......
I killed the FUCK out of a little dog this morning with my truck !!
How do you kill the fuck out of a little dog ??
If you don't want to know DO NOT high lite the following text ,
[COLOR="White"]As I was blasting thru the back roads of rural Arkansas this morning , a little white dog suddenly ran from the woods right in front of my truck , I missed him , but the little brown dog was Not so fast, 10,000 lbs worth of F350 at 60 mph , both front and rear tires , I saw chunks flying , and the spray on the side of the truck , i slowed down but when I saw the chunks falling I knew there was NOTHING I could do :yeldead: [/COLOR]
FUCK !!!! THAT STARTED MY DAY OFF BAD !!
Sorry to be SO descriptive but I needed to get it off my chest .
Sorry, zip. :( At least you know he didn't suffer.
And the white dog had a warm breakfast.
HLJ - I so did not need to see that HUGE picture when all alone in a spidery building. I don't have a problem with spiders, but that was too much too soon.
Ducks I laughed out loud when I read your post - it ranks up with my all time favourite of Wolf vs preying mantis. And reminds me not to sneak looks at the Cellar today when the office fills up, you're all too funny for me to get away with it!
RIP little brown dog. Still, like Clod says at least you didn't have to go back and finish the job.
My goddamn back is killing me. I've developed what feels like a typical crick in one's neck, except it's down by my shoulder blade, and it's been there for days despite repeated massages and hot baths and such. It's making me sleep for shit--and I wasn't sleeping great to begin with these days--which has put me in a nasty mood all around. Last night was the worst yet, and case in point, I should damn well be asleep right now except my back woke me up enough that my body decided it was time to eat, and there's no ignoring that. Now, instead of feeling full, I'm having Braxton-Hicks contractions instead, which means no way will I be able to doze a little before it's really time to get up. Piss-moan-grumble-bitch-whine etc.
I have horrible butterflies about my interview (16.15 this afternoon)
I'm going to try and bury them with food
Good luck :) Let us know how you get on!
Zip, at least you didn't swerve and end up against a tree or upside down in a ditch.
Clodfobble, it sounds like one of your thoracic vertebrae is out. Do you have a DO or chiropractor who can make an adjustment? There are also some arm/shoulder stretches that might help.
Hey Jesus, how about that back and arm stretching device you used, was that helpful?
:bolt:
[COLOR="White"]another step in my road to hell[/COLOR]
I'm not going to read the post in white....Hope you are feeling better today Zippyt!
:)
I don't even think I would have a day if I killed a dog on my way into work. I'd just call the whole thing off and go home and be miserable. Kudos for having a day after that! I would refuse.
Hey Jesus, how about that back and arm stretching device you used, was that helpful?
:bolt:
[COLOR=White]another step in my road to hell[/COLOR]
Back is better, hands still hurt.
Clodfobble, it sounds like one of your thoracic vertebrae is out. Do you have a DO or chiropractor who can make an adjustment? There are also some arm/shoulder stretches that might help.
I don't officially have one, but I guess I could find a chiropractor on Monday if it keeps up through the weekend. Oddly enough, I was stretching my arm and neck around in the middle of the night and it suddenly was much, much worse, so now I'm afraid to do any kind of stretching at all. Is it possible to describe a magic pop-your-own-thoracic-vertebrae-back-in motion I could make?
My goddamn back is killing me. I've developed what feels like a typical crick in one's neck, except it's down by my shoulder blade, and it's been there for days despite repeated massages and hot baths and such. It's making me sleep for shit--and I wasn't sleeping great to begin with these days--which has put me in a nasty mood all around. Last night was the worst yet, and case in point, I should damn well be asleep right now except my back woke me up enough that my body decided it was time to eat, and there's no ignoring that. Now, instead of feeling full, I'm having Braxton-Hicks contractions instead, which means no way will I be able to doze a little before it's really time to get up. Piss-moan-grumble-bitch-whine etc.
I don't officially have one, but I guess I could find a chiropractor on Monday if it keeps up through the weekend. Oddly enough, I was stretching my arm and neck around in the middle of the night and it suddenly was much, much worse, so now I'm afraid to do any kind of stretching at all. Is it possible to describe a magic pop-your-own-thoracic-vertebrae-back-in motion I could make?
Clodfobble, my primary care physician is an osteopath (DO) and, comparing our two pregnancies, the one where my wife was getting regular adjustments was a
far more comfortable experience for her. Unless you just love your MD, a DO is like a doctor and chiropractor all in one.
I agree Flint. I go to a practice that started when I was old enough I told my mom I didn't want to go to a pediatrician anymore, and two docs had just started their DO practice. I've been going there ever since, though it has grown to a few offices and many more DOs. I swear by them, whether it's a back problem, the flu, or personal issues.
The real problem is I was brought up with a healthy dislike/distrust of doctors. If it's not bad enough to need a specialist, I don't bother. I can't recall ever having a primary care physician, and I've never even heard of a DO before. BUT, having researched the symptoms of thoracic vertebrae problems, I am quite convinced that's what's wrong with me. And joy of joys, I managed to find a chiropractor who could see me today! I am ridiculously excited about the possibility of having my back popped--I haven't been able to do that to myself in months!
The real problem is I was brought up with a healthy dislike/distrust of doctors. If it's not bad enough to need a specialist, I don't bother. I can't recall ever having a primary care physician, and I've never even heard of a DO before.
A DO is a doctor with a healthy dislike/distrust of doctors. And, they will pop your back.
The real problem is I was brought up with a healthy dislike/distrust of doctors. If it's not bad enough to need a specialist, I don't bother. I can't recall ever having a primary care physician, and I've never even heard of a DO before. BUT, having researched the symptoms of thoracic vertebrae problems, I am quite convinced that's what's wrong with me. And joy of joys, I managed to find a chiropractor who could see me today! I am ridiculously excited about the possibility of having my back popped--I haven't been able to do that to myself in months!
A DO is a Doctor of Origami. They can fold you into all kinds of shapes.
A DO is a doctor with a healthy dislike/distrust of doctors. And, they will pop your back.
What Flint said, and...
Here is an article about DOs. A couple good points:
A doctor of osteopathic medicine (D.O.) is a physician licensed to perform surgery and prescribe medication. Like an M.D., an osteopathic physician completes 4 years of medical school and can choose to practice in any specialty of medicine. However, osteopathic physicians receive an additional 300 to 500 hours in the study of hands-on manual medicine and the body's musculoskeletal system.
Osteopathic medicine is dedicated to treating and healing the entire patient as a whole, rather than focusing on one system or body part
A DO is a Doctor of Origami. They can fold you into all kinds of shapes.
:lol:
My wife is going to a conference in Miami for 4 days...I hate her.
I ate too many easter eggs :greenface
I ate too many easter eggs :greenface
I did that too once, Ducks.
Then I found out you have to peel them.
it's not easter yet ducks. You should save the bellyache till Sunday. ;)
Yeah, but my good clients have been bringing in eggs for me.
Peel them?
are you doing an...actually, I might just start a thread instead of having a conversation about something else in this one. You know how touchy some people can be. lol
Lack of cellar time due to life interference is what's upsetting me. Need to get myself a new job, so I'm heading out to a temp agency tomorrow to see what's available...and just as I decide to do that, my car also decides it's thinking about blowing up...so my dad is also taking me out for emergency car shopping, my college loans kicked in earlier than they told me they were going to, and when I attempted to use the "easy and quick online payment option" I got a notice in the mail a few weeks later saying I had "insufficient funds" (WHICH WAS HIGHLY UNTRUE) and my bank consoled me by telling me "oh, that just happens sometimes"
Pleh. I hate growing up.
On the upside, things with the new boyfriend are going great! Oh, and I got my hair done again...[SIZE="1"]maybe I'll take some photos when I have some downtime.[/SIZE]
Holier-than-thou Europeans are irking me today.
Hypocritical bigots need to realize that bigotry is bigotry, no matter who you're raping with your judgment stick.
"You're American? You're white? You're a male?
Well, then it's my duty to inform you that the world is a Very Big Place, and, until you renounce your country and join our imaginary international brain-orgy, I'm afraid you're no better than a monkey driving a pickup truck."
"But I didn't - "
"Shhh."
"- even say anyth -"
"SHUSH."
When was the last time one of those arrogant little shits visited Georgia to expand their cultural horizons?
Fuck them. Fuck them in the eye.
[/end rant]
I have horrible butterflies about my interview (16.15 this afternoon)
I'm going to try and bury them with food
Try NOT to vomit on your interviewer
sry Zippy that happened to me years ago. We were walking along a busy highway(my daughter and I) and saw a puppy on the other side. she said"oh how cute", called him and BAP that was it. freaked her out for a long time. You just need to remember that it was quick at least
sry Zippy that happened to me years ago. We were walking along a busy highway(my daughter and I) and saw a puppy on the other side. she said"oh how cute", called him and BAP that was it. freaked her out for a long time. You just need to remember that it was quick at least
I hope you mean the puppy.
yes HLJ the puppy :eyebrow:
ARRRRGGG my internet connection has been going out every hour or so all day, then coming back 5 minutes later really F'ing up my cellar time
[COLOR="White"]please dont be pregnant, please dont be pregnant[/COLOR]
Hope it works out, Ducks. :(
Thanks Clod.
Ive been procrastinating about symptoms for a few days now, but the up-yuckie this morning and sore boobs has me worried.
Feels like about this time last year I had the same dilemma.
Im peeing on the stick tonite.
Yes? No? The boobs is always worrying..... don't keep us in suspenders....
Boobs are a killer symptom
Good luck
All good:D
3 minutes of pacing and BINGO, one little blue line.
Thanks guys.
That's a long 3 minutes.
:)
In any job there comes the point at which the job stops being the great thing you signed up for, and starts to suck. This can be for any particular reason.
The point has now been reached, For me, usually this happens after six months, but this time it happened after 10 months.
The pattern in my life is that I will now start being less and less happy until I'm downright depressed. This period lasts up to the two year mark in the job, at which point I leave for another company.
Rinse and repeat
until life complete
Really? Because my cycle is 6mo. to a year. The current job is ending any second now. After only 3mo.'s this time. Lucky UT...lucky.
I am depressed and now insane.
I'm supposed to be looking for a new one right now...heh. Back to it..
I'm sick - again. I had to cancel plans for this weekend that I was REALLY looking forward too because I don't want to infect anyone....except my co-workers that is.
Ducks, good to hear about the single line! I have been there before!
my nose has been bleeding for abiout half an hour now... :( I think it's nearly stopped but I'm well pissed off at this point.
Actually being up the duff wouldnt bother me at all, its being up the duff to someone who dumped me that would blow dog balls.
"Up the duff" is a new one on me. I like it!
It can't possibly be :eek: -the board's been swamped with Brits and Aussies for the last two years..... :lol:
Usually, my ex sis-in-law who lives in NZ, tells me some of the better phrases. I rarely get to use them in conversation around here; most of the people I hang around barely grasp the local vernacular. :) But she never told me that one. I think it's great.
So, it means "preggers" but what is the origin, or why does it mean that?
http://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/397300.html
sorry, I appear to have misplaced my beloved dictionary of euphemisms, so here's a little something I googled.
What I find really interesting about that, Monster, is that slang describing pregnancy is derived from male, not female physiology. That's fascinating. The last vestiges of the medieval concept of conception perhaps? The idea that the woman just houses/provides a fertile bed for, the male seed which then becomes a child.
Not upsetting as such...but, I don't want to start a whole new thread when there's a handy pre-made thread here:
I finished with D. It wasn't working. Unfortunately, in the three months it's taken for me to feel sure about that he has started to fall in love with me.....so...long story short, I've hurt a good friend quite badly. But hey.....can't know 'til you try can you? Trouble is, I agreed to give take a bit of time and talk again see if I still felt the same way, only, there's a bunch of really serious contentious politics shit going on in the party and a big meeting tonight (some of you will know about the complaint I made against a fellow member? the final meeting is tonight) so....we've talked pretty much every day about party business....he's totally fighting my corner at the moment so I feel guilty that actually i really wanted just a couple of day not talking to him...is that mean?
I said to him, let's talk once this hellish week is done with. He agreed. So...now i'm in limbo. As far as I am concerned the relationshhip is over...but til we've closed it properly the atmosphere is weird. He offered me a lift back from a meeting last night and I said I had already sorted a lift out (with my ex and best friend J).....he was really hurt. I just couldn't bear the thought of a car journey whilst this is all still floating about.
Anyway...that's where I'm at. To cap it off I feel sick with tension abotu tonight's meeting. Tonight we vote whether to send the matter to the national party for them to investigate and deal with. What they do with it I don't much care. I want him on record in our party as being a bully....as there being enough evidence to convince the local party that something's amiss. The panel that's reporting on it feel there's a case to be answered. Now it's all down to number. By my maths, if all my people show and all his people show we've got a 14-13 split.....with two unknowns (not in either camp) which could swing it either way.
If he gets away with this he is going to be fucking insufferable. The meeting is going to be ...contentious. Not looking forward to it....just want to go to bed with a smoke and a good book.
Well, looks like things have cleared up with your friend J.... That's good news right?
Oh yeah. Me and J are fine. Glad things are back on an even keel there :)
Well...we won the vote. The matter has now been referred to the national party to look at. What they decide to do with it almost doesn't matter. The best he can hope for is for the complaint to not be proved ... what he can't get from them is proof of innocence. Essenitally, whatever happens from this point there is a cloud over his record within the party: not because I complained, but because an elected panel of three members found there was a case to answer and a meeting of delegates to the general committee heard from complainant and subject and arrived at the conclusion that there was enough there to warrant referring it to national......basically, if he does this again his 'victim' has something they can point at to say he has been implicated in such behaviour before. He is no longer untouchable and with a blemish-free record at the local level. Whatever the national party finds...every step along this route is held in the local party minutes as a permanent record of events.
Really pleased re the Party outcome, really sad to hear about you & D.
If we're both still singlr when I hit 40, fancy trying the other side for a while ;)
*grins* honey if I was taking a bus to Hebden, you'd be my first choice as travelling companion :P
I'd forgotten that euphemism - made me bray with laughter
btw (wrong thread entirely HIJACK ALERT) I saw Son of Rambow the other night (on a free ticket from Heat :))
It's a lovely, lovely film. I laughed out loud, I leaked tears quite badly.
Didn't even recognise Jessica Stevenson (my ideal woman) until the second scene she was in, I was believing in the film so much.
It was good & short, nice & loud (Cherry's top two requirements for a good film) and I was so sucked in I barely even wanted to kill the threesome in front of me who must have wandered in by mistake because they carried on their conversation intermittently throughout the film.
Go see.
(directed at Dana because it's a Briitish film that might not get wide release in the US)
my nose has been bleeding for abiout half an hour now... :( I think it's nearly stopped but I'm well pissed off at this point.
After an hour of bleeding this morning I ended up in the urgent care. Nosebleed stopped after about two hours, but the respite was short.... Five hours later I'm home and miserable and there's nothing stopping it happening again. The doctor was so incompetant it's untrue. I'll be going somewhere else when it starts again and have an ENT contact for monday because the doctor thinks he may have left a bit of cotton up there :rolleyes:
Wtf monster?!
Too much aspirin? High blood pressure? What?
neither. blood pressure is awesome, don't take asprin. The stuff was leaking out of my tear duct ffs. I was crying blood. And spitting out great clots.
They put these inflatable plugs in which was totally not awesome. then decided they weren't working and took them out again. which was more than a little unpleasant and painful. They wanted to pack with cotton after that and I just said no. That doctor was so incompetant and also sexist that if it bleeds again I'll go elsewhere to get it packed. He wanted to give me loads of painkillers even though it didn't hurt and a 10 day course of antibiotics because the plugs they put in were "forign bodies"
I'd rather die at home with dignity, to be honest
I'll be happy to take those painkillers, monster. :)
Hope they're able to figure out what's up soon!
yeah -he offered me Vicodin for a bit of discomfort that passed as soon as they had finished inserting and inflating the deformed tampon up my nostril. I shoulda taken it and sold it on the black market.
Shit, monster, that sounds horribly distressing. You feeling any better yet?
Not particularly. However the doc said cold drinks are good and I'm just about to have one, so I'm sure I'll feel lots better soon ;)
However let me tell you blood coming out of your eye is not very nice if you wear contacts, although might have been funky for Halloween :D
(also managed to orchestrate some tidying of the kids rooms which didn't involved me bending and lifting too much, so feel mildly more productive).
thanks all for the sympathy :)
After having enough of the pizza place I was working for--and not having found a real job yet--I applied to work at a new restaurant/pizza joint run by a member of St. Louis foodie royalty. I got hired, and based on my conversation with the owner's wife (who is running the business side of things), I will be working there full-time and making as much as I did at the old place.
Well, last week we had an employee meeting, and I looked at my schedule--13 hours this week, 19 next week. Well, that sucks, but the place is just opening, so it could be tough in the short-term. Plus I can always pick up hours at the old place until things pick up at the new place.
Then they told me how much I'm gonna make...essentially, it is $2 an hour less than what I make now. I told them that at the rate things are going, I'll have to find a new job by the end of April; they told me they would try to figure out a new wage.
Today, I was supposed to have POS training from 1-4. I got there, and the general manager told me that it had been canceled, and they forgot to call me.
While I don't think anything that's been happening has been mean-spirited or malicious, it seems like God is telling me not to work for these guys. So I'll go look for a new job tomorrow.
Sheesh monster - how are you feeling today? I always wondered what it would be like to cry blood.....now, I don't really think I want to know. :)
Sycamore - I agree, I think there is something saying RUN THE OTHER WAY! Good luck on the job hunt.
As for me.....I. am. still. fucking. sick.
Absolutely nothing after Monster's tale. Blech!
Hang in there.
I thought she was kidding about crying blood in that other thread. Holy crap! Monster, I hope you found out what in the hell is going on today!
On the other hand, you might be a Catholic Saint.
:)
Hope you are feeling better today.
Gee, thanks guys:D. Well Dr Incompetant (who has been calling nightly to check I'm still alive and not planning to sue) had decided that the only reason it could have stopped bleeding after 2.5 hours and a failed plug attempt was because he must've left some stuff up there that was stopping the flow, so I needed to see the ENT bod on Monday for foreign body removal. He kept trying to force feed me painkillers and antibiotics and wanted to plug it again in the meanwhikle. i ran.
saw the ENT bod yesterday morning. She said no foreign body, no sinister reason for the bleed -just extra bendy nasal passages and and extra long extra dry winter. She cauterized it. So now -after a winter with no colds and no flu in this house, I'm sniffling away and sore as fuck, plus I look like I've been stuffing blueberries up my nose. Well yesterday it was blueberries, today it looks more like licorice. But no more bleeding so far. yay *sniff*
9 and a half more goddamn days. Not that I'm counting, or anything.
[size=1]Yes I am. And it's actually 9 and a half more days plus about 2.5 goddamn hours. Goddamnit.[/size]
9 and a half more goddamn days. Not that I'm counting, or anything.
[size=1]Yes I am. And it's actually 9 and a half more days plus about 2.5 goddamn hours. Goddamnit.[/size]
Could be worse.
1) could have happened six weeks ago (our swim coach just gave birth, wasn't due til mid May -thankfully both doing fine)
2) mysterious time-travellers could appear and take you back to pre c-section days.
OK, neither is likely, but still...... ;)
(Waiting is teh suxxors)
whew....!Hope you are doing better monster,,,keep your chin up. Literally!
We're waiting expectantly with you for the little one too :)
I washed my Motorola smart phone and it did not revive after sitting in rice overnight. That's about $500 more to Verizon Wireless.
My mortgage waits another two weeks and goes into penalty. As it almost always does, costing me more money all the time.
My manager was unable to give me any positive thoughts that our failed group dynamic will improve in any way, only that it will get worse for the next three months, while we are in a critical mode as we are moving the office. "You want out of the group, and your co-worker doesn't like you and no longer wants to work with you... and it's a team situation that won't work at all if you don't communicate... but we think you do not have the skills to move anywhere else in the company. And we really need you to stay in the group for at least the next three months. What can I do as a manager to improve the situation?" "Nothing I can think of." "Well if you think of something let me know." *faceplant*
I washed my Motorola smart phone and it did not revive after sitting in rice overnight. That's about $500 more to Verizon Wireless.
My mortgage waits another two weeks and goes into penalty. As it almost always does, costing me more money all the time.
My manager was unable to give me any positive thoughts that our failed group dynamic will improve in any way, only that it will get worse for the next three months, while we are in a critical mode as we are moving the office. "You want out of the group, and your co-worker doesn't like you and no longer wants to work with you... and it's a team situation that won't work at all if you don't communicate... but we think you do not have the skills to move anywhere else in the company. And we really need you to stay in the group for at least the next three months. What can I do as a manager to improve the situation?" "Nothing I can think of." "Well if you think of something let me know." *faceplant*
You can have my unused cricket phone? Did you really put your phone in rice?
I am sorry about your morgage. I used to pay my rent like that so I know how you feel.
Lastly, your work troubles. damn. I'm really clueless there. I have empty hands and flimsy platitudes. :thepain:
I wasn't much help. sorry. I hope things improve quickly.
Thanks Sky. Yup, if your phone gets wet, the #1 approach people have found is to put it into a container of rice overnight, so that the rice slowly sucks away all the moisture.
tony, you're saying that your co worker doesn't 'like' you?
how can that be? what kind of a wang would
'not like' you? ... am i misunderstanding your post?
oh :(
I just googled 'smart phone' . It's a nice phone. ...
Have you checked out buying a used phone to avoid ponying up full price to Verizon?
Thanks Sky. Yup, if your phone gets wet, the #1 approach people have found is to put it into a container of rice overnight, so that the rice slowly sucks away all the moisture.
That only works if your phone is made in China or India.
Yes well you never know what kind of dynamic is going to happen in the workplace.
My coworker finds me to be too laid back and error prone and disinterested in playing the alpha-geek game.
I tend to fold under such situations and admit defeat, which really annoys the alphas. They want you to play. They do things like hide their information and then mock you for not knowing it.
The work situation sucks UT. You have my symapthy.
I take it you didn't have insurance on the phone?
No I have this theory that you shouldn't insure something you should theoretically be able to afford to replace. The theory falls apart when you can't afford much of anything though.
Given that I kinda know you IRL, UT, my suggestion would be to head into the office one day and just be ridiculously outgoing with a hint of aggressiveness. I do that at my job sometimes and it totally fucks with people and keeps them on edge.
"And we really need you to stay in the group for at least the next three months. What can I do as a manager to improve the situation?"
Dude, you've just been given a free pass! Pull an Office Space; do whatever the hell you want. Show up late, take long lunches, start referring to your coworker exclusively as "shitwit" but with a huge grin so he can never be sure if you're out-alphaing him or just being rude... Maybe you'll even convince him to quit.
They do things like hide their information and then mock you for not knowing it.
lol!
I have completely been there!!
They get this aghast look on their face when they realize that you are not up to speed with what they were intentionally hiding from you.
Wankers!!
Let them let you go, do not quit. Lead them on, get your unemployment, get your severance pckg. whatever. I was in a special projects group like that...It ended with me in a bay of 40 comps. by myself because the small group did not like me (2 members) but they still needed me. So screwy. A building full of people sitting side by side, and me, in a bay of 40 comps. by myself, separated from my group. After awhile I quit, but I should have stayed and got my severance. They were the last group in the building and got to stay after the doors were shut. I would have been alone, but not by myself (with severance).
Given that I kinda know you IRL, UT, my suggestion would be to head into the office one day and just be ridiculously outgoing with a hint of aggressiveness. I do that at my job sometimes and it totally fucks with people and keeps them on edge.
Dude, you've just been given a free pass! Pull an Office Space; do whatever the hell you want. Show up late, take long lunches, start referring to your coworker exclusively as "shitwit" but with a huge grin so he can never be sure if you're out-alphaing him or just being rude... Maybe you'll even convince him to quit.
This is the way to go!
Appear to be playing their alpha-male game whilst actually mocking it. Meanwhile big hugs UT ...
Bad: they wrote my complaint about the group dynamic up as an "Official Warning" which I had to sign and it goes into my permanent record.
Good: manager who understands group dynamics is looking to fix the whole thing because they say they don't want me to leave.
God I hate work politics UT. Every now and then, throw in stuff like "working by values" and "target setting" when lip service is really all they crave. Yeah, I can't fake it either.
Hang in there.
Workplace politics are the pits. Hope things settle down UT.
:D *shudder*
Looks like another day that I will refuse to post my resume....Irrational? Very irrational. I need to pay bills but it's too soon for me to interview and not screw up.
UT, It sounds like your environment is no longer working for you, and I am wondering if in your line of work, whether or not you can go to a smaller business in your area, and be happier, but make the same amount of money? (maybe more rewarding as well) I am sure you are very good at what you do and imagine that you can take your talents just about anywhere you want to.
I could only make guesses about what you do, I used to know but can't remember. But I am sure you are good at what you do and maybe an upstart might be more suited to you at this time? Can you run your own business doing what you do? Can you contract or do you hate contractors? I like being a contractor when I can because people actually love you when you show up to save their dumb-asses and you get to leave before 5 if your job is done. Not only that, you get to charge them for everything...So you can also charge them when they bother you with their buzz-words, and no write-ups, they just don't call back and that's fine if you have a large client list. Do you have a business idea that you can get a loan for? I bet you do. I bet you are holding out. I bet you have a brilliant idea, or so, kicking around in the toader brain....
:)
Ahh p'shaw..You are probably still happy there, and I'm the only one making a big deal about what's going on at your workplace.
Cicero...officially butting out!!
UT, I am sorry you have that kind of situation right now. What would have happened had you not signed the write up? I hate when employers manipulate their employees this way. It feels crappy, I know. You deserve so much better.
My printer is upsetting me. I bought some nice photo paper and a straight cutter so I can make some inexpensive prints of my artwork and now the printer is on the fritz! I know...it doesn't take much, huh?
case, can you print them at Wolf Camera, or somewhere similar? I don't know what that would cost, but it might be cheaper than fixing your printer.
I wonder what you mean by, "fritz"?
She dropped it on the cat.
I wonder what you mean by, "fritz"?
Fritz Von Erich, patriarch of the Von Erich wrestling clan?
they wrote my complaint . . . up
Who is they?
How can an employer a) cite you for complaining about something and b) promise to fix it? Either one might make sense by itself, but both together?
I could only make guesses about what you do, I used to know but can't remember
Linux/Unix system administration and web programming/development.
Do you have a business idea that you can get a loan for?
I'm in six figures of family debt already, for the last time I had an idea. :thepain:
Who is they?
How can an employer a) cite you for complaining about something and b) promise to fix it? Either one might make sense by itself, but both together?
They is my manager, and the HR person; in a company of 30 there is only one HR person, thank gawd. 98% of HR people are 100% useless!
I really want to post it outside my cube but they would definitely write me up for that.
lol!
Steve is under some illusion that they have to make sense! That's their job, to confuse you with nonsense so you finally give up trying to figure it out, and just sign whatever out of sheer frustration.
It gets even better when they are explaining what they are doing, (nonsense) and seem very officious about their ridiculousness. You get the overpowering sense of.."you can't be serious, but I can see that you are." This is surreal.
case, can you print them at Wolf Camera, or somewhere similar? I don't know what that would cost, but it might be cheaper than fixing your printer.
Earlier today I went to Reed Camera to see about their prints and quality, etc. Well, I figured that it would cost me less to make my own on my printer, so I stopped off at Staples and grabbed some nice photo paper and a straight edge cutter and came home. This is where I am now. So, I already spent the money on the paper and the cutter...not to mention the gas to drive to Denver to talk to the people at Reed...I am not sure what to do at this point. Maybe I should just take the rest of the day off. :p
What size prints are you trying to make?
UT, I am sorry you have that kind of situation right now. What would have happened had you not signed the write up? I hate when employers manipulate their employees this way. It feels crappy, I know. You deserve so much better.
My husband had the same shit go on in his last job, Seven years in well paid hell, with a write-up and forced therapy(what's bothering me? I hate my fucking job!) So a month later he quits, we relocate and now he loves his new job, new town and life is good. My point is that things will get better
They is my manager, and the HR person; in a company of 30 there is only one HR person, thank gawd. 98% of HR people are 100% useless!
I really want to post it outside my cube but they would definitely write me up for that.
Just a point of order, Undertoad. Please remember that the Human Resources department works for the benefit of the company. They manage the resources of the *company* of type Human. Not unlike the shipping department handles boxes in and out and the facilities management handles the air conditioning and desks and chairs. Each department has an aspect of the company's interests to deal with. One of those interests is "Humans".
Don't be mislead that they're there for your benefit, despite the fact that they might work with benefits. It's an easy and common mistake, one I've made more than once. I offer you the chance to learn from *my* mistake, and remain alert to the fundamental loyalties of the company department members.
What size prints are you trying to make?
8 X 10s. I can now get the 5 X 7s to work, but 5 X 7 is so small. When it gets about 3/4 of the way through printing, it doesn't feed the photo paper through fast enough so it squishes the rest of the image into a thick black line and when it is "done" it acts like it is spitting out the print, but instead the print is stuck in the printer. I have to pull it out of the grips of the printer. Arg. 5 X 7s work because by the time it is done printing it, it hasn't gotten far enough to get "stuck."
Frickity frackety fruck fruck fruckers...at my work! ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Thank you.
Feeling powerless, I am now responding the only way I know how... I have posted the Official Written Warning outside my cube.
I normally post Achewoods and XKCDs and other such comics there for the people to enjoy.
Since it's "Confidential" they now have a Real reason to Warn me.
Good for you, UT. Way to make a stand, brother.
Wait a second, don't they know who you are?
You're like the leader of Fight Club, or something; they don't even know who is sitting right there in their own office!
You rock UT.
What is upsetting me today? I don't know why, but every numnut dumbass who makes any kind inane insipid comment whatsoever makes me want to claw my eyes out, rip out my teeth, and dig into my brain until it rolls out of my skull and lands on the wet, wormy earth.
A bit grumpy.
Result: they threatened to fire me.
I took it down.
Well then, you better get back to those TPS reports and pronto!
Darnit UT, wish a good guy like you didn't have to deal with the nonsense.
Maybe getting up at 2am to open my daughters crusted shut pinkeye has me fuzzy, but I'm confused.
You made a legit comment about the group dynamic, to which they said "If you don't have any ideas how to fix it, neither do we, so deal", then made an official [COLOR="Red"]warning[/COLOR] to YOU document to put in your file? WTF were they warning you about?
FWIW I'd have put it up too. It's YOUR file.
They did have an idea on how to fix it, which consisted of a "mediation" where they brought us both in and we said nice things about each other until we were happy again. This was successful, but it still bothered me that I somehow got an official Written Warning out of it, so I posted it. My boss's boss called me in and basically told me if I wanted out of the company he would take care of that immediately. And that I was being a baby about it and that if I had a problem with it I should see our HR person. I agreed and left his office with my tail between my legs.
:( Nice. I see they "value people" too.
Don't be mislead that they're there for your benefit, despite the fact that they might work with benefits. It's an easy and common mistake, one I've made more than once. I offer you the chance to learn from *my* mistake, and remain alert to the fundamental loyalties of the company department members.
I've learned that HR never truly sides with the employee in situations like this. Have seen it too many times.
Good luck.
It's time we put "human" back in "human resources." :)
Edit: pardon my tail. That is basically what BigV was referring to, or lack thereof. Good points, BigV. Sorry. :blush:
I might be wrong, but all that nonsense could have been avoided if you'd just kicked his nerdy ass after work one night.
...I am now responding the only way I know how...
There's a place for people like you.
Brown nosers are upsetting (and dangerous)
The modern HR operation, be it a single person or a mega-department exists for one reason and one reason only.
To prevent the company from getting its ass sued successfully by current, former, or wannabe employees.
That's the part I don't get. I understand having a paper trail to cover their ass regarding recording that there was a mediation, blah blah blah, but it's the warning to UT that's throwing me for a loop.
TGIF Toader, and have a Grey Goose and lemonade on me tonight.
For me, it's all the Animal Care and Use Committee that always pisses me off with their stupid 'paperwork and proper channels'...but at least I only have to deal with them once or twice a month (a guaranteed PIA every time though)
I was upset earlier today by how warm it was.
I had lots to do in my lunch break and ended up hauling a planter, some compost and about half the workshop's lunches back over the pedestrian bridge over the main road. Oh I was hot! And it was bright!
Apparently, we are having snow later this weekend (WHAT?!)
So the catnip I carefully transplanted into a new planter will have to stay here for the weekend. I daren't take it home yet, as it's too small to survie - my boys will annihilate it.
Still, as someone who's motto could be The Colder The Better I am gratified by the bizarre shift in temperature.
It was snowing again today
We must have receive 20 feet of snow this last winter.
Global warming???
I'm in six figures of family debt already, for the last time I had an idea. :thepain:
At least animating the tip jar seems to have worked, to help cut down further drain on your resources.
Why do people lie? Why would anyone pretend to be someone they are not? You are what you are and you do what you do...doesn't anyone know that if you lie to forge a relationship that at some point the other person will figure it out (probably sooner, but will initially be met with "I DID NOT LIE") and then it's too late? The slowly blooming trust is gone. Done deal. You can never go back to before, when you thought perhaps the person was actually for real.
I just don't get it. Well, I get a lot of it actually as I am notorious for trusting the wrong people, but I don't get why people lie about who they are. Almost every time I think I might try to trust someone, I find all these ugly lies. Why? :(
:sniff: Being human is to lie about being human?
Okay. I have one. (Hi, btw...haven't been here for awhile, but this seems like a good place to start as any). Here goes...
People who swear in the office. I don't mean just sh-t and the F word under their breath...but at the top of their lungs....yelling and running around the room like a banshee on fire.
It ruins the creative process (I work with a bunch of radio/television copywriters) and damaging to the overall spirit of the department.
My other coworker and I decided that we might have to create a "swear jar".
Welcome back, Goddess!
And about those people in the office: f*** 'em, they're just a bunch of @#$#$ *&#^& #@#@(&s. ;)
Ha. You owe a dollar to the swear jar!
Oh looky there another blatant lie out of classic.
;)
Shawnee, I have become a human lie detector. I don't choose to expose one every time it comes along...The catch is to be with someone that is terrible at it. I have been with people that were actually diagnosed as perpetual big fat liars (my jargon added). I guess you have to gauge intent with the little white and the big, fat, beastly ones to the best of your ability, and if it was all do to selfish causes on the liars part, you may not want to stay with that person because they will drag you through a recurring hell just to satisfy some petty want, that incidently, totally screws you over (and repeat). (Please excuse the run on)
The other side of the liar coin:If things were done to protect you in some way..well..it's your choice. The road to hell is paved with good intentions...yes..but at least the good existed at all and there is something to work with, the good.:)
Yes humans lie but so do really big, fat, abusive assholes that need to go to cell block- bullshitter maniac that took your money and ran!!
Little white lies, yes I understand that. In my opinion, this was a beastly one that lasted a period of a few months. It was so unnecessary, too.
I guess I'm just hurting.
Really cool that you replied Cic. I had to go into a classroom yesterday to administer a student survey. I picked up an English textbook "Essays" and read an essay about the ways in which humans lie. There was a quote from Cicero! I wish I could find it on the net but will try to look for it later.
Little white lies, yes I understand that. In my opinion, this was a beastly one that lasted a period of a few months. It was so unnecessary, too.
I guess I'm just hurting.
Really cool that you replied Cic. I had to go into a classroom yesterday to administer a student survey. I picked up an English textbook "Essays" and read an essay about the ways in which humans lie. There was a quote from Cicero! I wish I could find it on the net but will try to look for it later.
:)
I hope it all works out. If they lied to try and save the relationship you are really going to have to think it over.
I want to know what they lied about. I am nosey. I am guessing it's this guy living with you. hmmm? yea....What did he do this time hmmmm?
You don't have to answer any of that btw. ;)
If it just temporarily hurts and can be worked out go ahead and do it. If this person has done this kind of thing before and you are being a chump..I would not support further contact with this individual.
:)
It's not the Homeless Guy. He can do nothing but lie and I am aware of that and therefore do not believe much of what he says.
I have no way of knowing if this lying is just the status quo for this individual or not, but it's no way to start out any relationship, friendship or otherwise.
Trust sensors off.
Make a swear sock instead of a swear jar. If they haven't learned their lesson by the time they fill that baby up with quarters, well, then they will :)
lol!@schmutz
Shawnee: dead on the mark.
I'm pretty sure I have an infection in my incision. Gotta call the doctor's office tomorrow. :(
Oh Clod, thats ickie for you.
I hurt my back trying to do shit at work that I shouldn't have been doing...I'm out until Monday.
X-rays revealed mild arthritis in my lower back.
I'm fat, and having a hard time getting the weight off.
I like working for the new restaurant, but we just don't have a delivery business yet, and I lose money every day I work there. I'm going back to the old place until delivery business picks up at the new place.
Oh, and I have a nasty cold. But Advil cold and Creomulsion seem to be working.
That Creomulsion tastes like bbq sauce, but it does the trick with a cough.
Hebe's fish tank heater malfunctioned while we were out and her fished boiled to death including the two new ones she got yesterday :(
my hormones are making me insane, hot flashes, and my arm hurts a lOT and I'm out of pain pills. my radiation oncologist is a BITCH. I"m gonna fire her tomorrow.
Me, losing bricks out of my wall, having known better. :cry:
That is some sad stuff there Shawnee.......If you still have some bricks left just insert them back.
Ice Cream Emergency!! Someone get Shawnee some ice cream!!
And someone trip that guy over there, I don't care if he is responsible for this or not... it'll be funny.
:)
Shawnee just concentrate on what a good person you are for handing out scholarship money.
teehee
You know the worst part about it? When you KNOW you are standoffish, and you don't let anyone in, and you have your guard up all over, and someone comes along and urges you to let people in, almost faults you for isolating, then ends up hurting you.
Go figure.
Ummm, ice cream. I like Vanilla Chocolate Chip with just a smidgeon of Hershey's syrup.
:)
Smidgeon? Pigeon. You want a pigeon of Hershey's syrup? That doesn't sound so appealing.
On the phone with the IRS...taxes rejected for the second time...this guy has no idea what I'm talking about. Lovely.
They put my Grammy (my last grandparent) in the hospital. I guess she was having difficulty breathing, and they want to run tests. Mom called to put me on warning, because as my dad said "She's 95. She's worn out."
She lived in her own home until just recently, when dementia demanded she needed more care.
She misses Gramps. They were married 55 years when he passed away, some 20 years ago. They were something else. Friends. Buddies. In love all those years.
:sniff:
That sucks beyond words, I am so sorry. :(
Thank you. You are all very kind.
My brother-in-laws brother, R, is 46. He is a lawyer in NYC for the legal aid society. He doesn't drink or smoke and is trim. He suffered a massive heart attack at a friend's appt. in Queens---took 20 min. for them (emt, docs) to revive him and then, b/c he has no insurance, they stabilized him then shipped him off to another hosp. He's in a drug-induced coma and on ice (to slow everything down)--he's been this way for a coupla days now. Everytime they try to warm him up--he seizes.
Did I mention that he is 46? did I mention he was in a 20 min. no-go zone?
Sorry to hear that Shawnee, grandparents are extra-special. :(
They put my Grammy (my last grandparent) in the hospital. I guess she was having difficulty breathing, and they want to run tests. Mom called to put me on warning, because as my dad said "She's 95. She's worn out."
She lived in her own home until just recently, when dementia demanded she needed more care.
She misses Gramps. They were married 55 years when he passed away, some 20 years ago. They were something else. Friends. Buddies. In love all those years.
:sniff:
Ah Shawnee. I can't mouth platitudes about the fact she's going to go to a better place because you know I don't believe it. But at 95 she must have lived a full life and obviously made an impression on you. I genuinely believe the way we live on is in the memory of others. Talk to your nieces about her. Knowing you, you took the time to hear her stories while she could still tell them.
Some people burn brightly, some flicker on. Sounds like she has had both in her life. Just feel glad she is - and has been - loved and is probably now beyond any pain and regret.
No one says it better than Sundae.
Im very sorry Shawnee.
Bri, hope everything works out for R.
lots of upsetting here. Thoughts and prayers to all whose loved ones are ill.
SATs saturday, Psych (as in the class) Exam monday AND tuesday, Math exam wednesday and thursday, performance of Eanna thursday and friday, and prom the next week - which means i need to work up the balls to ASK someone.
hell week, here i come
Where is my GODDAMN POCKET KNIFE?!
Back to finding everything but what you were looking for Bigv?
:)
If I remember correctly the last time you found it, you were looking for something else? So look for something else and you might find it?
Not as upsetting today as yesterday but....
We have this vending machine at work nicknamed "The Wheel of Death" cause it's one of the kinds that spins around, and has a tendency to make our employees not feel too good after eating from it. I've eaten from the wheel many times, and although the food is kinda gross and sometimes causes a little bit of heartburn or a small tummy ache, overall it's no big deal...just enough in yer belly to get you through the day.
Recently they've been putting in little pizzas which are actually rather edible, don't make me feel icky or anything afterward..not a 5 star meal, but edible. AND on my 5 1/2 hour shifts, they made my half hour lunch optional. Woohoo...extra half hour of pay, so I've been skipping my lunch and just grabbing a snack instead from the vending machines on my break at the end of the night.
HOWEVER, they tricked me. Goddamn vendor man switched out the good pizza with gross pepperoni-sausage-onions-and-peppers icky pizza. Ate about 1/4 with all the gross toppings and then scraped everything off and just ate the bread. What? I was hungry. Back to work..no problems...bout an hour later, I get a tummy ache.
Blech, damn pizza. Tummy ache sticks around till the end of my shift, but hey, it happens, no big deal. Get home, tummy ache worsens a bit, but still doable. Talk with adorable boyfriend on the phone, go to sleep.
Wake up at 3am and barf brains out. Repeat every half hour until 3 pm. Loving boyfriend calls around 4:30 and asks if we're still on for our plans to hang out. He finds out I've been sick and brings me mashed potatoes to settle my belly, and sits with me watching movies for the rest of the night.
My abs hurt.
Where is my GODDAMN POCKET KNIFE?!
Back to finding everything but what you were looking for Bigv?
:)
Hardly. I'm as lost as they come.
If I remember correctly the last time you found it, you were looking for something else? So look for something else and you might find it?
Good call.
You may call off the dogs.The fucking sock monster in my dryer must've eaten about three more socks last night.
That's just LJ gearing up for some more sock puppet hilarity.
That's just LJ gearing up for some more sock puppet hilarity.
I R not an alter!!!
My brother-in-law's brother, R, died this morning at 2a.m. due to a massive heart attack. He was 46.
Ditto.
I finally sent Malibu Barbie off to greener pastures
yesterday.
My corset didn't arrive.
I feel like crying. I am also very angry at the seller who did not respond to my Wednesday plea explaining that I needed the item by today. Also didn't respond to my Thursday plea asking if I could pay more for delivery to ensure delivery today. Just sent me a generic "your item will be despatched" etc ect on Thursday afternoon. Which got my hopes up, thinking they were going to get it out First Class delivery that day.
Nope. Postie has been and gone. I have the shoes. Red to match the corset. I have the skirt - really cool zip up one, black. I have the choker - black to match the skirt.
Funny how the other items got here on time.
Sob.
So tomorrow I have to go into town and try to find something else to wear. Who knows, I might find something wonderful. But it won't be a corset and I had my heart set on that.
I'm considering leaving bad feedback for the first time in my life.
ETA - they called me after I emailed them AGAIN
They have been very decent and are sending it to my home address tomorrow on a guaranteed Saturday delivery (which they are footing the bill for)
So nothing is making me unhappy!!!
Oh. Except the massive swing to the right in the council elections and the fact everyone has now agreed that Boris Johnson will be Mayor (official results tonight but exit polls and political pundits have agreed)
You know how sometimes when balancing the checkbook you can forget to carry the one and later it turns into a costly mistake. I wish I was that smart. I remembered to carry the one, unfortunately I forgot a whole freakin' month's worth of expenses and it is biting me really hard. :( :thepain: :mad:
Wait...don't you work in finance? I want to see your client list, mister...I think they'd like to know about this!
Srsly, that sucks man. I do shit like that occasionally...fortunately it's gotten better since I've started using a calculator to back up my brain.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I work as a financial advisor, that doesn't mean I'm a good bookkeeper. Totally different skillset.
yeah, a whole freakin month worth of expenses entered. I already ran payroll for the month so this is kind of a big deal. ah, whatthehell. live and learn.
Ken Livingstone lost the London mayoral election.
He was washed out in the anti-Labour landslide, despite all he has done for the city in the last 8 years. I was hoping against hope that he could hold on (and he so nearly did - it went to second preference vote) as it looks likely there will be a Conservative goverment in the next election too. At least if we had Ken, he would fight parliament on our behalf.
But the people that think only with their pockets have won the day, and voted in a buffoon to represent all our interests.
It's a sad, sad day. I am grieving.
Sorry Ken - we tried our best.
Oh for fuck's sake... Minifob just got into a boxed game of Mancala that I didn't even know we had. I know for a fact he swallowed at least one of the little playing stones (like marbles, but flattened,) and I suspect it was several more.
His poop will be bejeweled! :rolleyes:
Still sick...the consensus is that we suspect some kind of e coli was in the pizza. Had to call off work today, and they were NOT happy.
Oh, and SG, I feel your pain. Boyfriend's birthday is on monday, and I had ordered the perfect (rare and out of print!!) gift for him off ebay...won and paid for with quick shipping for an extra cushion of time...3 days later I get an email that my money was refunded...with an email saying "oh, sorry, I accidentally listed two of those, my bad." RAWRGH
As 10yo daughter went to bed, she mentioned that she felt sad because her best friend's mom had had a stroke and was in the hospital, unable to talk. Sad enough, she's probably only about 40, but when you add in the factor there's no dad because he was a soldier, took a headwound, never recovered and commited suicide you just start to feel there's no justice sometimes. She'd just started to get their lives back on track after getting the govt to admit responsibiilty and help them financially.... :cry:
d'oh! :(
There really isn't anything I can say to that, that won't sound insanely stupid.
Because sometimes, in certain situations, there really isn't any justice. You just have to fight to be happy with or without it. That's a, no matter what.
Do you know what? Sometimes I really do believe things are a matter of luck. My intellect shirks this notion..but still..
The Royal Bank of Scotland?
The Royal Bank of Scotland?
:lol:
:lol:
they used to be such a piss-pot little bank and now they're an international PITA
this was supposed to be an edit, not a quote -I'm knucking fackered.
Random Bad Shit. The kind of life-changing, devastating bad news you can't ever plan for or anticipate.
Random Bad Shit. The kind of life-changing, devastating bad news you can't ever plan for or anticipate.
Thanks for the definition - I've been wondering how to categorize that.
woke up crying from a dream.
silly, but tends to put a downer on my day.
Aaaw! I do that. In fact I did that the other day. I gave myself a few hours and actually was feeling refreshed later. Better than I had before the said, cry. Of course I couldn't stop crying once I started, but after it was over I felt ten times better!! I guess I needed a good cry.
Maybe you should keep crying until you are done, and committ to moving on with your day when it is over!
(That worked for me but I can't guarantee that it works for everyone)
I want to ask what the dream was about but I am not going to. ::Polite::
:)
it's a lot more fun to wake up laughing. Dream was stupid--some kind of social court where I got shunned. And Lex Luthor was my brother!
Not a nightmare, but disconcerting as hell.
So, I undertook some shopping therapy!
And what did you get me?!? Nothing? Again?!?
:p
Vista , just fucking Vista !!!!!!
Watching the Kentucky Derby today and seeing Eight Belles get put down. Sad. :(
Watching the Kentucky Derby today and seeing Eight Belles get put down. Sad. :(
Same here - my father knows the family... He was very proud of her finish and then so sad. Bummer. (See signature)
2.0 is home with Pneumonia. It's been a rough 14 months for the kid. RSV x2, a number of sinus infections, and now this.:(
Awww. Take care of the little guy. :(
l123, that sucks.
GET WELL SOON!
Pass that on for me, willya?
Oh poor babes. Hateful when they're poorly sick.
Everybody seems to be conspiring to annoy me as much as humanly possible.
Not me!!
I always prefer to work independently.
See there... you're even impersonating a non-existent conspiracy to get me that much more annoyed.
I'm raising "annoying" to "seriously aggravated bordering on pissed off."
I somehow injured my left shoulder 2 days ago...no idea how I did it. The doctor thinks it's my rotator cuff, and I go to the orthopedist on June 2nd. If I tore something, I'll have to have surgery. I get to go to physical therapy for that and my back now...fun!
I lasted at a new delivery job for one night last night--the set-up was just weird and the boss was a bitch. I'll just keep delivering at my old place until we leave for the East Coast...which is 4 weeks from today.
Ouch Syc, that really sucks. Hope you don't have to have surgery :(
Goddamn stupid software.
I got my digital camera, what? 2 years ago?
I was always able to watch the videos I made on it immediately on my old NHS pc and the old pc in the shop I worked in.
So now, 2 years later I have a Dell laptop.
Built for me less than a month ago.
So why do I have to arse about with downloads?
And why am I getting two messages at once and completely unable to work out which is valid? All I want to do is upload my damn video to YouTube like I have for years.
Sorry to bring this up when you are pissed, but if you are too lazy to get free software, and then complain about the life-enhancing technology that is free..well.....jeeez!
How much easier can the world get for people? Sorry. I'm kind of annoyed with the universe today... Don't take me srsly.
:)
Maybe I'm getting bitchy. People are pissing me off. My guests last night were assholes and taped it on top of that, then saved it to my fucking desk-top. Thanks buh-bye.They should just go back to London...
I'm not too lazy to get free software.
I just don't know where to get it, what to look for, why I need it.
It was all done for me on my old computers.
Now I am being asked to download things that don't download, being asked to open things in operations I don't understand, being given options that don't match the tried and tested ones I'm used to.
I know, I'm at fault because I'm ignorant.
But when new technology makes something harder for me it makes me unhappy.
Now, if anyone is willing to offer me a step by step guide to getting a video from my digital camera onto my laptop I will sing them hosannas every day. Promise.
Hey, get in chat and I'll try to help from here. It's really easy, but hard the first couple of times. I need to find out what error messages you are getting. The info. on your actual camera etc.....too many questions about it to help yet..
I may take you up on it at some point, but it's the end of a long hot day for me now and if I come into chat it will just be to chat.
I get frustrated when I can't see a logical path.
It makes me swear.
Genuinely, thanks for the offer.
I gotta run...no chatty right now, just for chatty.....Gotta go into town!!!
:)
Momma's going to the city!!!! Well I hope your day goes better....I'm pissy and I guess it will just be that way all day..I'll get over it tomorrow.
I just found out there's some evidence that, as a DES daughter (my mom took this drug when she was pregnant with me), I'm more than twice as much at risk for breast cancer.
:( Better get that mammogram I've been putting off.
I went to a funeral this morning. Aside from the fact that it was about someone dying, it was a catholic mass, so it was a long funeral with lots of weepy people.
I don't know about anyone else, but when I go to a funeral, it always makes me think of someone close to me that's passed on. For me today it was my Mum, but I had to try and be stoic for the sake of the people I went there to support, so I did much deep breathing and looking out the window trying to dissassociate myself from the actual proceedings.
Now I suppose the catholics probably think I should feel guilty about that. I guess they'll get over it though.
I got distracted and tried to pick up a plate that had just come out of the oven. Stupid stupid stupid. Now, four hours later, my fingertips and thumb still bring me to tears if I let go of the ice pack for more than a few seconds. It will be very hard to sleep tonight if I have to keep getting up to trade out for a fresh ice pack from the freezer.
I don't even know where to buy that, but wherever it is, I bet they're not open at midnight...
you should have it on hand ....you have little kids.
buy it now
and
get this for bumps and bruises
Did your fingers blister Clod? If not, the burning sensation you feel when you take the cold pack off are the nerves 'thawing' out and sometimes if you can just suck it up for 10 mins, distract yourself with something...the pain will go away.
If they're blistered and still hurting, you should go see a doc.
yeah.....suck it up, already, Mary. rub some dirt on it.
you should have it on hand ....you have little kids.
buy it now
and get this for bumps and bruises
OMG you're a homopathic.
Do your customers know what a tree-hugging hippie you are when you've got them over the barrel, applying rust protection to their undercarriage?
Did your fingers blister Clod? If not, the burning sensation you feel when you take the cold pack off are the nerves 'thawing' out and sometimes if you can just suck it up for 10 mins, distract yourself with something...the pain will go away.
If they're blistered and still hurting, you should go see a doc.
The thumb is a little blistery, but not horrible. I went to sleep with my hand resting on the ice pack, and when I woke up again (or more accurately, was woken up) at 3:00, it was a lot better. You're probably right about the nerves thawing, sucking it up is so much easier when you're passed out. :) I still can't really do anything with it, but it doesn't hurt when it's just sitting there anymore.
What's upsetting me? LJ's frigging MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMpost heading, that's what!
Just be thankful that he didn't do W's.
WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWHY
Just be thankful nobody quoted it and resized it to 99 point font.
Jim hasn't been here yet...give it time
The thumb is a little blistery, but not horrible. I went to sleep with my hand resting on the ice pack, and when I woke up again (or more accurately, was woken up) at 3:00, it was a lot better. You're probably right about the nerves thawing, sucking it up is so much easier when you're passed out. :) I still can't really do anything with it, but it doesn't hurt when it's just sitting there anymore.
Well I'm glad it's feeling better today. I hope you could understand what I was saying and didn't think I was being harsh. It's just something I've noticed when I've been careless enough to do similar types of things in the kitchen.
Just try and remember it's sore before you pick up a hot coffee cup. ;)
I got distracted and tried to pick up a plate that had just come out of the oven. Stupid stupid stupid. Now, four hours later, my fingertips and thumb still bring me to tears if I let go of the ice pack for more than a few seconds. It will be very hard to sleep tonight if I have to keep getting up to trade out for a fresh ice pack from the freezer.
I picked up my curling iron on the way to an interview by the wrong end. I didn't just pick it up though, I picked it up and grasped it. :( I know it hurts. The best thing you can do is keep the ice packs on.
I wonder what DES is and what drug causes that Cloud?
Cicero: DES is a synthetic hormone (diethylstilbestrol) that was given to women from the 40s through the 70s to prevent miscarriages (and was used all over the world for a lot of things). It's a teratogen. It not only didn't work, it causes cancer and a host of reproductive abnormalities in the daughters of women who took it while pregnant with them. Hence, DES daughters.
Fortunately, I never developed cancer (yet!) but I did have cervical dysplasia (abnormal, pre-cancerous cells) and certainly, complications of pregnancy.
My knee! Damn thing started to go wonky last week, and instead of getting better, it's getting worse. Now the muscles surrounding it ache.
:(
tomorrow I will leave may home and go to a strange city far from my family, for work for money. there i have no friend now, so i fell a little upset. but in future i hope i could have new friends and a good work.
I'm hoping with you are lucky in this. Not to feel afraid, but excitement. and carefully with strangers.
dammit Flunt...need the SCF warning, please.
Dylan was last seen (here) at midday Thursday.
So he's missed two nights at home and two evening meals (they get raw chicken & bones).
He always starts the night sleeping on my bed and ends up sleeping on me - stretched out along my bare body - in the morning. Sometimes I dream someone is touching my face or hair and wake up to find it's Dyl. Once I stir he usually shifts to the cat-bed while I sleep for another hour or so.
He's not at work - I've checked the cellar twice now, the tool store in the yard, the container, the fireworks store and the music room. Bascially all the lockable places.
I've been door to door among the neighbours and put up Missing Cat posters. He's microchipped, so I know he hasn't been taken into a cat rescue place or they've have scanned him and called us.
Upset. Yes.
Oh shit, Sundae, that's awful. Keep us posted.
Fingers crossed for you SG. Have you also checked with the local police for a) found animals and b) road incidents involving animals (sorry to be so gloomy)?
Usually, as you know, the cat comes home and never tells you where he's been! Hope this happens for you, too SG.
The police scan cats for chips, so I know he's not been handed in (I activated an alert on his microchip).
I'll call the Council on Monday re road accidents - roadsweepers usually call them in. I've checked all the roads near me for evidence - even our local foxes are traffic aware and corpses are rare.
My assumption is he's snuck in somewhere and got stuck. Or monkey-nosed his way somewhere and been "adopted". Putting up posters and going door-to-door is all I can think of. I miss him.
My knee! Damn thing started to go wonky last week, and instead of getting better, it's getting worse. Now the muscles surrounding it ache.
Doctors! Now!
Dads has just been diagnosed with a
Baker's Cyst. It's being treated with drugs because they caught it early, but there are some grim results if it isn't. Get advice!
tomorrow I will leave may home and go to a strange city far from my family, for work for money. there i have no friend now, so i fell a little upset. but in future i hope i could have new friends and a good work.
Good luck. It's hard leaving friends and family but many people here have done it and survived to tell the tale.
Im sure Dyl is just off having a little adventure and will be back telling you about it very loudly soon, Sundae :)
SG: Keeping my fingers crossed and homeward thoughts for your kitty.
I'm planning to have a comprehensive medical exam in the next couple of months. Surely my knee problem will go away by then, but if not, I'll be sure to mention it!
My kids moved in with their father today.
(cautiously) that could be a good thing. Or at least have a few silver linings.
Oh Ali, thats gotta be tough.
How were the boys feeling about it?
We've all come up to the move with some trepidation, but as I've said to most people who've asked me the question, I'm hopeful that it'll be the best thing, but I am prepared for there to be at least a few teething problems so to speak. With any luck, that's all it'll be. It's really only for a little over six months till they finish out the school year, so all things being equal, we should all muddle through ok. The kids are ok. Semi-excited about getting two new homes all in the same couple of weeks, and setting up their new rooms in both houses etc. They have had some rocky periods with their father though, although things have been pretty good for the last year or so, so I'm pinning my hopes on that, as are the kids. Anyway, today is their first full day, so we'll see how that pans out.
Cloud, yes there are some things which will be good about it. The main one is that since Daryl and I met, we've really never had any time to just be a couple. He pretty much jumped in boots and all and became part of our family, so it'll be nice in a way to have that time to ourselves. Also, we've decided to try IVF after two years of trying and no pregnancy, so it'll be a good environment to explore that path in also.
Oh, it just dawned on me, your school year is opposite ours. :smack:
Yeah...if it weren't, it'd be the perfect time to move. Unfortunately, they're only just working their way through the second of 4 terms. It's not that long though. I just keep telling myself, it's really not that long.
Doesn't mean I don't still miss them like crazy already though. :(
You have to look at his in Positive way ,
With no little ones around to walk in at JUST the WRONG time , you guys could Actualy be able to make a babby !!!
sex on the couch ,
or in the kitchen on the counter
Naked Ninja attacks in the hall way at 2 am
Doesn't yer new house have a hot tub ??
Nude tubben !!!
For sure Zippy. I guess you just never know what might happen when the opportunity is there.
Oh, Sundae! I am so sorry. I hope he returns quickly.
Dylan was last seen (here) at midday Thursday.
So he's missed two nights at home and two evening meals (they get raw chicken & bones).
He always starts the night sleeping on my bed and ends up sleeping on me - stretched out along my bare body - in the morning. Sometimes I dream someone is touching my face or hair and wake up to find it's Dyl. Once I stir he usually shifts to the cat-bed while I sleep for another hour or so.
He's not at work - I've checked the cellar twice now, the tool store in the yard, the container, the fireworks store and the music room. Bascially all the lockable places.
I've been door to door among the neighbours and put up Missing Cat posters. He's microchipped, so I know he hasn't been taken into a cat rescue place or they've have scanned him and called us.
Upset. Yes.
I'm sorry for any pain you feel in giving them up. It's only natural.
It's a great experience for them and good for you in letting them have it. Come here and tell us (over and over again) if it hurts.
Thanks mate. I don't think I'll spend too much time talking about it here though. There are very few who actually really care anyway. Those who do have already had their say, and for that I'm very grateful. :)
good luck, Ali. Everybody's home situation is different, and I don't pretend to have a complete grasp of yours, but, I hope it works out on both home fronts, for you and the kids.
Good luck ali:)
Like you say, it isn't for a such a long time. Make the most of the kid-free time with Daryl, make it count! *smiles*
Yeah, I'll try to do that Dana. The poor babies are a bit sad tonight, but hopefully by now they're sleep since it's 10:30pm here. It's a bit rough on them, but hopefully they can suck it in and get on with it. I know that's what I have to do.
Ali: hang in there.
SG: keep us posted on your kitty.
Sundae Im freaking out about your cat - any news?
knee still effedup. Tried to go for a walk tonight. No go. :(
No Dylan.
Am becoming resigned. It's a big cloud over everything I do at the moment.
I just don't know what more I can do.
Oh Sundae, thats awful....Come Back Dylan!!!!
Once I had a kitty gone for two weeks who came back.
But it's not looking hopeful. I'm sooooooooooooooo sorry! I know I would be just devastated myself.
I've got to ask--did he escape, or is he used to being outside?
I pulled a muscle in my ribcage several days ago, and it hurts to breathe. I think I did it sneezing, :cuss: allergies. It's getting worse instead of better.
LR, it's quite possible that you have a subluxation of one of your thoracic vertebrae (I think Clodfobble had a similar problem recently).
Dude. If you have what I had, go get your back popped! The pain relief was immediate. (FWIW, I'd tell him to leave your neck the hell alone though. The pain's not in your neck, neck popping hurts like a mofo, and it can be very dangerous if it's done improperly.)
Some 'net searching has me convinced that I have pulled the intercostalis and/or seperatus muscles between/attached to my 5th and 6th ribs on my right side, based on the pain and locale. The pain is in the front, beginning under the very bottom of my breast and wraps around and under my armpit. Right where my bra fits.
How the frick am I supposed to keep training, when I can't breathe just sitting at my desk??? Damn damn damn.
rub some dirt on it and get back in the game. quit being a sissy and keep training.;)
or you can do what I do and that is cry and draw attention to my extreme agony so everyone will cater to my every whim. :D
No Dylan.
Am becoming resigned. It's a big cloud over everything I do at the moment.
I just don't know what more I can do.
Don't worry, SG.
Once I had a kitty gone for two weeks who came back.
But it's not looking hopeful. I'm sooooooooooooooo sorry! I know I would be just devastated myself. --snip
They do come back. You could look it up.
[youtube]WNyqXsv4Ueo[/youtube]
Oh, Sundae! I hope he comes back. Dyl, stop making your mama worry, so. I am sorry he is missing.
Some 'net searching has me convinced that I have pulled the intercostalis and/or seperatus muscles between/attached to my 5th and 6th ribs
Owwwwww that hurts... back when I had pneumonia in 2000, I had inflamed cartilage in my rib cage. It hurt so damned bad. My doctor told me people that get it often end up in the emergency room because people think they're having a heart attack. It was still lingering weeks after my primary pneumonia symptoms were gone.
Sundae...I had a cat when I was little (about 10) and it went missing. About 2 months later my grandfather who lived about 1km up the road rang and said his neighbours (who he was on very good terms with) had my cat and they wanted us to come over and have a talk about it.
Their daughter was about 5 and had apparently grown very attached to my cat and they asked if they could please keep the cat. My mother said they could.
I remember being very angry with my mother and thinking that I was still a little kid too, just a bit older than the other little kid.
I guess my mum did what she felt was right, and she got me another cat anyway, but it still sucked.
The point is sundae, maybe as you thought in the first place, Dyl has been taken in by some family who think it's best to keep cats indoors, and they're loving him just as much as anyone could. Maybe that's why he hasn't been able to come home.
The important thing is that he's being loved right? Even if it does suck that it's not you.
I'm afraid it's cold comfort.
He's obviously a pedigree. If the family didn't recognise that then they are inexperienced cat owners. Also, if they seriously wanted to take care of him they should have taken him to the vet. Any vet would have immediately felt his microchip and scanned him, triggering the alert.
Finally I can't believe - even if he has no attachment to me - that he has no attachment to Diz. They groomed eachother, slept together every night (and most days), played at least 5 distinctive cat games. Diz has been wandering round crying for him. And Dylan has a mighty voice when he wants to. What kind of person would keep a cat who yowls every day and still think they are being kind?
I might be wrong. A well meaning but selfish, ignorant person might be holding him captive. But my hope that he was trapped somewhere is also dust and ashes now. If he had no access to food or water he's died a horrible death by now, crying and hoping to be rescued.
Sorry. I know I'm over-dramatising. I'm just upset tonight. I should never have let him out in the first place - he was just too curious. Almost everyone I've asked knows him, has seen him, has come into contact with him.
I'm sorry for you mate. I wish I had better words for you and I realize there's really nothing that helps. Don't despair though. He may still come back.
Sorry Ali, I do realise you are being supportive and I take on board what you've said. I'm just seeing the most negative side of it all right now and have over-thought it from every angle, each time coming up with a worse scenario.
Thanks to everyone for your kind words, I do appreciate it.
There's no need to say sorry Sundae. I think we've all been where you are today. It's devastating to think of losing a pet that you love so much. I'm going to be a mess when my dog Sheba dies. If I lost one of my cats I'd go nuts too.
We know how you feel. We expect you to be sad, so just go ahead and spill your guts. Specially if it makes you feel any better.
Some addict left a hypodermic on a playground. A little person I know picked it up and got stuck. Ruin your own life asshole, that's fine, but when did it become necessary to shoot up on a damn playground?:mad2:
Holy crap Griff - (no words)
That really sucks, Griff. I hope all the inevitable tests come back clean. :(
i was just remembering an episode of COPS i saw where a cop gets pricked. he was talking about boiling it in bleach.
if you had a pair of tin snips in your right hand, and accidentally pricked your left pinky with a known AIDS infected syringe, what would YOU do?
see a doctor right away; there are drugs you can take which may inhibit the virus
How about the Burma junta impeding cyclone aid -- visibly out of sheer racism, bigotry, and a crimes-against-humanity degree of shitheadedness?
If you were them, would you trust the American Military? It is upsetting, though, I hope a way is found soon to get the aid in.
see a doctor right away; there are drugs you can take which may inhibit the virus
When my friend was doing a volunteer program in Africa, they told all the girls that if they were raped,
do not go to the police, go to the hospital first to get the drugs. Apparently if it's administered in the first few hours, it's extremely effective. [/sidenote]
...you know that feeling, when you are soooo tired you feel sick?
Sundae--I am so sorry for you. I grieve with you, my friend. :hugs:
Yeah, I keep hoping for some good news about Dylan. Hang in there, girl. :(
I have a good friend who is a hard-core alcoholic. When I first met her several years ago, we would go out all the time. I eventually had to stop because I felt like I was contributing.
I still go out with her--occasionally--because I like her and we have fun. At least until she gets way too drunk. But I can't do it too much, because it's depressing. All her friends are like that, too--it's all about the alcohol. Having lost a marriage to this, it's not something I can enjoy.
Plus, I can't keep up!
Bought something from Ebay which I really wanted, and after I bought (and paid for it) I get a message from Ebay that said the listing had been pulled and I should apply for a refund of my money.
WTF? Couldn't they have pulled the listing before I purchased it? It's completely disappeared, so I can't even check out why. Maybe the seller had horrible feedback or something (usually don't pay too much attention to this).
Maybe I'll still get it, dunno. I have 45 days to request a refund from Paypal.
Mr. Clod just left for a business trip and will be gone until Friday.
I will be alone with two kids all week, the main challenge of which will be managing to eat a reasonable dinner every night without the motivation of cooking for someone else, because eating is a fucking chore. Then I will take delivery of the two stepkids on Friday and deal with dinner/bedtime for all four of them before Mr. Clod gets home late in the evening, and then the next morning my MIL arrives :rolleyes: along with a bunch of other relatives and we host a birthday party for the toddler.
Bought something from Ebay which I really wanted, and after I bought (and paid for it) I get a message from Ebay that said the listing had been pulled and I should apply for a refund of my money.
WTF? Couldn't they have pulled the listing before I purchased it? It's completely disappeared, so I can't even check out why. Maybe the seller had horrible feedback or something (usually don't pay too much attention to this).
Maybe I'll still get it, dunno. I have 45 days to request a refund from Paypal.
Usually items get pulled because they are against ebay or copyright guidelines, Cloud. Not because the seller is shonky.
Was it something like that?
it was a Coldwater Creek necklace. One of many listed. I did notice, after I bid, that the shipping was pretty high, but I forgot to look at the feedback.
Perhaps they accidentally listed more than they actually had to sell.
maybe. I really wanted that necklace though, bah!
If you were them, would you trust the American Military? It is upsetting, though, I hope a way is found soon to get the aid in.
I wouldn't be them; I'd be
me. And Burma would be a
lot more competently run, freer, and no longer a Non-Integrating Gap state, nor an oligarchic dictatorship.
The idjits running the junta have simply never had justification for their behavior.
Gotta agree with that one. There is simply no excuse for letting, lord knows how many thousands of people, suffer and die because they won't let foreign ships (not just ours), sitting offshore, unload relief supplies.
Simply none.
I have an exam tomorrow morning. I have not done anywhere near enough revision. In fact I have found it almost impossible to marshall my efforts in that direction all fucking week. I worked like there was no tomorrow during the campaign and managed, by the skin of my teeth and the patience of my school to get all assignments in and good quality at that.....I was left at the end of that mad month with 2 weeks to revise for one exam.....I have probably logged seven hours if that. I now have to spend the whole of today in panicky revision and am still having difficulty starting (hence being here at all).
Oh well. If I can throw a solid five hours at it I should be able to remember a few relevant queens and dates. I just hope I have enough of em to weave an argument for whatever questions come up.
[eta] oh yeah and to add to the feeling of approaching panic is the fact that I have become unable to get out of bed in the mornings. Even if its something important I see the clock reading maybe 5 am.....then the next thing i know it's gone 9. I have to be up and out of the house by 7 tomorrow morning in order to get to the exam for 9. This is worrying me.
Starting over again - AGAIN !
I'm getting too old to be doing this shit.
classicman, it's never too late to start over.
Awesome. Just fuckin' awesome.
Minifob has figured out how to climb out of his crib. Happy birthday to him.
Traditionally, there are two solutions to this sort of thing. One, a sort of tent device that traps him in from the top as well. Two, giving up on the idea of keeping him in the bed at all, and instead putting a gate at the doorway so at the very least he is trapped in the room until morning. If he plays until he just passes out on the floor, so be it.
But of course, he figured this out five minutes before Mr. Clod took the car to Houston with the stepkids, so I don't have the option of going to purchase either of these items. Bedtime tonight is going to be soooo much fun.
I feel for you.
Putting him back to bed in silence is what parent friends of mine advocate. But it can take up to five nights.
Clod ==> :zzz:
cf, don't you have some rope or bungee cord?
classicman, it's never too late to start over.
yeh I know, but its getting really old. I'm tired of it all.
yeh I know, but its getting really old. I'm tired of it all.
[harshlove]Don't then. Stay where you are, as you are.[/harshlove]
New beginnings take energy, and that is what you are drained of right now. But nature promotes growth and rebirth. It's in all of us.
You'll come back bigger and better and stronger and happier than before.
You're not a seedling any more, you're established growth putting out new shoots.
Awesome. Just fuckin' awesome.
Minifob has figured out how to climb out of his crib. Happy birthday to him.
Traditionally, there are two solutions to this sort of thing. One, a sort of tent device that traps him in from the top as well. Two, giving up on the idea of keeping him in the bed at all, and instead putting a gate at the doorway so at the very least he is trapped in the room until morning. If he plays until he just passes out on the floor, so be it.
But of course, he figured this out five minutes before Mr. Clod took the car to Houston with the stepkids, so I don't have the option of going to purchase either of these items. Bedtime tonight is going to be soooo much fun.
on the bright side, if it's his first day at clambering out, there's a chance that he'll do it so often he'll wear himself out pretty early.... keep on encouranging it -either he'll get exhausted or he'll decide he's done pleasing you and stop.....
cf, don't you have some rope or bungee cord?
You joke, but I have a friend who had to take one of those kid leashes (a chest-harness attachment that's intended to keep them from running away at the airport or whatever) and thread it through the rails to keep her son inside, because he could A.) unzip the crib tents from the inside, and B.) climb over doorway gates. Oh, and she had to put it on him backwards, because after three nights he figured out how to take the harness off too. :worried:
Chicken wire or a shock fence ,
or time for a big boy bed he has to stay ahead of the Babby
Time to prove you're human....
I always seem to get those wrong first time, grumble grumble
dJzG, maybe?
Yeah, I think so, but look how much I magnified it by. These things are getting stupid -all I wanted to do was play Euchre online ffs. It doesn't even keep the spammers out anyway. By the time I worked it out I was timed out AGAIN. I can do them better when I'm drunk tbh.
Clod, he sounds just like my son. Bedtime was ugly, for years. We tired almost everything short of locking his door.
If it's any consolation, it did eventually stop, and he now plays second base, watches Zoey 101, complains about the need to memorize multiplication tables, and sleeps all night in his own room.
Two, giving up on the idea of keeping him in the bed at all, and instead putting a gate at the doorway so at the very least he is trapped in the room until morning. If he plays until he just passes out on the floor, so be it.
This is basically what we do, except we installed a
screen door on the girl's room. We put her in her toddler bed and leave the door cracked, but the screen door completely closed.
Sometimes, she gets back up, opens the door and fusses at the screen door, but we stay out of sight -- and she gets back in bed (she even shuts the door, as if the whole thing was just a staged protest).
...At naptimes, she does do the whole pass out on the floor thing sometimes. But that is happening less often. Because she is in charge of being in bed (and isn't "trapped"), she realizes that she actually prefers it.
Flint is upsetting me today
He just wants to be memorable.
We kept our son in a crib until he was old enough to say "I want a bed like [my sister] without bars on it." Luckily, he had never figured out how to climb out of it. The sides were too tall, and there was nothing to step on.
Thor was out of his and over the gate very, very early. We tethered a hungry bear so it could just reach anything that crossed the gate.
We never really used a crib... just put them in bed with me/us. Layed down with them for a bit until they fell asleep...
Spencer slept in a crib with the side removed pushed up against my bed when Ippy was a baby.
He just wants to be memorable.
Quit saying things about me... that don't end in -rrific.
Today? Try over a week. I've been coughing every few seconds, and my throat tickles. Strange thing is, it stops when I lay down.
Quit saying things about me... that don't end in -rrific.
Quit being so mean to Bri and I will!
Today? Try over a week. I've been coughing every few seconds, and my throat tickles. Strange thing is, it stops when I lay down.
Try basic glycerol. Unflavoured, uncoloured, unsugared - you get my drift. It coats your throat nicely.
If it really has been a week though, I'd get to the Doctor pronto. You shouldn't suffer anything more than 5 days imo. In not a hypochondriac either - using this criteria (apart from routine appointments and a pulled muscle) I think I've been once in the last ten years.
Quit saying things about me... that don't end in -rrific.
soporific.
:snore:
Have plans to see a DC United soccer game tonight with all the families of my daughter's soccer team. The girls are supposed to do a "tunnel" on the field or something like that for the professional players when they come out. Been looking forward to it for a month or so now.
But we are having severe thunderstorms (my office building's lights are flickering and the power is out at home) and a tornado was verified in the area half an hour ago. This severe weather is supposed to last most of the night.
Grr.
Today? Try over a week. I've been coughing every few seconds, and my throat tickles. Strange thing is, it stops when I lay down.
Get that wang out of your mouth and it might go away. :eek:
I had to leave the car mechanic without having the work done (state inspection overdue by 2 months, and a long-overdue fuel injection flush) because Minifob had a total and unendable meltdown in the waiting room (over the fact that I wouldn't let him pull the car batteries down off the display shelf and break his toes.) Since I expect the battery display will stay in place for the foreseeable future, this may honestly mean I have to take the car to a different mechanic with a less tempting waiting room to get this work done at all.
We went to one car mechanic *once* who had a display of miniature classic car models on shelves that were a child's height. Signs all over the shelves said "do not touch." This was in the customer waiting room. WTF?
I think I'm missing something Glatt.
It's not as if children would ever be in the waiting room alone, surely?
I agree it might have been more sensible to have them higher, but hey - maybe they look better at that height.
To fill a waiting room with cool toys that say "do not touch" on them is going to cause unneeded stress in customers who might have children.
Perhaps they don't want customers who have children, but are afraid to come right out and say it.
Either way, they lost us as customers.
Edit: It would be like putting a plate of delicious food in the waiting room on a table with a sign saying "do not eat this." Or maybe a stack of magazines on a table saying "do not read these."
glatt, when you go to the gun show, do you let your kids play with all the guns?
I mean, I would, but that' s why I don't have kids.
To fill a waiting room with cool toys that say "do not touch" on them is going to cause unneeded stress in customers who might have children.
Edit: It would be like putting a plate of delicious food in the waiting room on a table with a sign saying "do not eat this." Or maybe a stack of magazines on a table saying "do not read these."
Firstly they aren't toys. They're models. I'd agree if it was actual toys, that would just be nasty. All it takes is explaining this to the child. So it's more like putting out wax fruit or fake books.
Secondly... if you can't control your child in a customer waiting room you're going to have a lot more stress in your life from other directions.
The school I went to when I was five would always bring out a cake when anyone had a birthday. We'd sing and blow out the candles, but we never got to eat the cake because it was made of cement.
To fill a waiting room with cool toys that say "do not touch" on them is going to cause unneeded stress in customers who might have children.
I once had to drive Mrs. Dallas to the emergency room. (Nothing serious as it turned out.) Our daughter was about 1 at the time so we just brought her along.
They had some little play tables for the benefit of kids.
Immediately next to uncovered electrical outlets. :3_eyes:
Firstly they aren't toys. They're models. I'd agree if it was actual toys, that would just be nasty. All it takes is explaining this to the child.
This is a tough distinction to get across to a kid, depending on their age. Especially if it's the only thing interesting in the room.
Secondly... if you can't control your child in a customer waiting room you're going to have a lot more stress in your life from other directions.
But sometimes you can't. The odd thing is you can tell your kids to do stuff and sometimes they just won't. It's certainly true that some parents refuse to even try to control their kids and think it's just darling and oh so clever when they try to disassemble the cash register. But even the most well-behaved spawn of the best parent will have a limit to the time they can sit and behave, and once that limit's reached you're in for a rough time.
I've gotta go with Glatt on this one. For young kids, that has to be an awful lot of temptation. To them, all cars small enough to play with must be toys.
But sometimes you can't. The odd thing is you can tell your kids to do stuff and sometimes they just won't. It's certainly true that some parents refuse to even try to control their kids and think it's just darling and oh so clever when they try to disassemble the cash register. But even the most well-behaved spawn of the best parent will have a limit to the time they can sit and behave, and once that limit's reached you're in for a rough time.
Isn't it then up to the parent/carer to come up with something to occupy the child rather than expect others to put up with irritating behaviour? Why should others have to suffer the burden of the choices you make?
I have to agree with Sundae here when she says that if you can't control your child when they're young, you're in for a hell of a time later in life.
But even the most well-behaved spawn of the best parent will have a limit to the time they can sit and behave, and once that limit's reached you're in for a rough time.
Exactly right, Steve. We called it "used up all their 'good'".
Surely anyone that's going to somewhere with a 'waiting room' with a small child is going to go prepared? I just don't get that you expect the waiting room to provide the entertainment. I'm not saying you should expect your child to sit there quietly and do nothing, but as a parent you have a responsibility to your child to ensure they're stimulated by the right sorts of things. Doesn't every parent have a small bag of toys and or books etc that they keep in the car or by the door to take for occasions like this? Actually scrap that. I know they don't. That's why we're having this discussion.
Seriously?
Those that havent had/got small kids, I can semi understand, but those of you that have had small children, I am really shocked.
I am totally with glatt, you cant those kinds of things within reach of children and expect them not to touch them.
It IS nasty, kids dont know that the shiny little models arent the same as their matchbox toys.
Children have bad days, just like anybody else, some days they will be perfect obedient angels (although, I am yet to see this) and others they will be hell on legs and purposely defy you every second of the day.
Yes I have toys for this occasion, but what child isnt going to want to play with the new and shiny toys that they havent seen before, rather than the bag their parents have?
I try and keep the boys on a short leash, but it doesnt always happen without a fight.
What Ducks said
....and then some.
never mind the kids, the blooming adults will pick them up and fuss with them. maybe not in the UK and Aus, but here, for sure.
If you don't want it touched but want to display it for the public, put it in a goddamn glass case.
Toddlers can't distinguish between models and toys, and safe and dangerous, and they can rarely resist temptation. They're curious and learning, and their primary way to interact with the world is through touch and experimatation. yes, if you are a good parent it is usually possible to prevent your child from playing with things they shouldn't, but not always, and furthermore it's hard work. Where's the customer service aspect of providing a waiting room that is stressful to the customer?
I didn't mean to start anything here.
For the record, the kids didn't touch them, and we did have a couple of distractions in my wife's purse that paled significantly by comparison.
But it was freaking torture for the kids to not touch all those shiny beautiful toys that were right there, taunting them. While we waited and waited.
I didn't mean to start anything here.
Well you shoulda! :lol:
Isn't it then up to the parent/carer to come up with something to occupy the child rather than expect others to put up with irritating behaviour? Why should others have to suffer the burden of the choices you make?
I have to agree with Sundae here when she says that if you can't control your child when they're young, you're in for a hell of a time later in life.
You're right, I should have drowned them at birth when it became obvious that they weren't perfect, and I wasn't either.
You're right, I should have drowned them at birth when it became obvious that they weren't perfect, and I wasn't either.
Don't be silly! You just need to beat them some more...
Firstly they aren't toys. They're models. I'd agree if it was actual toys, that would just be nasty. All it takes is explaining this to the child. So it's more like putting out wax fruit or fake books.
Secondly... if you can't control your child in a customer waiting room you're going to have a lot more stress in your life from other directions.
You have to understand the age of child we're talking about here... From 5 and up, I agree, they should be more than able to just sit on their hands and behave. They won't enjoy it, but they should be able to do it, with the occasional reminding.
But seriously, my two-year-old couldn't even handle a
picture of a car on a big heavy block. That was what he wanted, you know--the picture of the car on the car battery. If there had been actual model cars set out within his reach, with or without a 'Do Not Touch' sign, we would just have turned around and left instantly. I wouldn't even have to wait for the temper tantrum on that one.
EVeryone who doesn't want Sundae Girl to babysit their kids raise their hand.
@Clodfobble: HOw about a picture of a really cool race car on a can of charcoal lighter fluid? (Kingsford, I believe) I posted about this before somewhere, but WTF? why not put Elmo on the friggin thing?
I admit I had a lot of ideas about kids like SG's when I was in my 20s, now I see that although Inch rarely has meltdowns, they do come and from his perspective they are perfectly reasonable.
You wait an hour, that's 1/262,800th of your life. Your 2 year old waits an hour, that's 1/17,520th of their life. Or something like that.
No, wait. That's my argument for not giving someone who is only 30 pounds and adult sized portion of ice cream.
I think I'm beginning to see the problem. We weren't even allowed out of our cages until we were 6.
@Clodfobble: HOw about a picture of a really cool race car on a can of charcoal lighter fluid? (Kingsford, I believe) I posted about this before somewhere, but WTF? why not put Elmo on the friggin thing?
My daughter kept getting stung by ants. Then I noticed a picture from her coloring book -- of Ernie from Sesame Street, playing with ANTS and letting them crawl all over his arms, and smiling down at them. WTF?!
She's curious about nature, so we have to reinforce that ants are bad and will sting you. But, why am I having to compete with her initial impression, that ants are friendly, happy bugs that Ernie plays with?!
Oh and btw, congratulations to SG for writing probably one of the stupidest thing I've ever read.
Which one? I thought I held that distinction - guess I'll have to try harder.
Meh, I wasn't thinking of toddlers, I was thinking of children.
I still believe that they should be able to be instructed what to do by their parents and comply with it, but I bow to the weight of collective experience.
That would explain what I see every time I go to the supermarket I suppose.
I still believe that they should be able to be instructed what to do by their parents and comply with it, but I bow to the weight of collective experience.
Oh, that is the goal, to be sure. You tell them what to do even when you know they won't do it, because at some point they'll decide they don't like the step that comes next, and actually start listening. But in the meantime, all you really have is your superior size. Minifob thinks I won at the mechanic, because I picked him up and took him away. Eventually he'll behave in the face of that threat. But he must never realize that he successfully prevented me from getting what I wanted too (getting the car maintenance done,) or you'll have mutiny on your hands.
... or you'll have mutiny on your hands.
I have been getting a lot of mileage out of "We can do it the easy way or the hard way, it's your choice." For now he sees that he has a choice about
how "it" will be done, rather than
whether "it" will be done. And as long as I have the size advantage and am willing to rough him up a bit I'm not worried about him calling my bluff.
@Flint, get the BBC planet earth series dvds, they really satisfy the need to teach kids about nature and animals in a non disney way. eg no, polar bears and leopard seals are not cuddly and cute. Warning: BBC is not afraid of gore so you should vett the films 1st.
Lemme see here - as my kids got older and understood a little more of life, I had a favorite saying.
This family is not a democracy, it's a dictatorship and I'm the dick!
I can see how parents might find it inconvenient having toylike cars that kids can't play with in the waiting room. But...it's a garage right? I don't know what it's like there, but garages really, really don't take kids into account. They're just not kid places to be. They're barely female places to be. Pretty much everywhere is designed with adult males in mind. In Sundae's defence, I would never anticipate waiting rooms in garages to be anything other than kid neutral, if not downright kid unfriendly.
Really? There's a big plastic playhouse, a TV, AND a woman's restroom where I get my Jeep fixed...
Here you're lucky to get a coffee vending machine, a few chairs and a tatty copy of Auto Trader. And that's in the big chains! In the independents you just go into the workshop and holler.
My daughter kept getting stung by ants. Then I noticed a picture from her coloring book -- of Ernie from Sesame Street, playing with ANTS and letting them crawl all over his arms, and smiling down at them. WTF?!
Our son just looooved Mary Poppins. (We ought to watch it again, it's been a while.) And he got a "thing" about umbrellas. We couldn't walk past an umbrella display without him freaking out. We found some small ones at a dollar store, so after that he had his own it it wasn't quite so much of a problem. (We were a bit worried he'd decide to jump off the stairs or something)
Business Op for you SG -set up a a family friendly garage. Although IIRC, places like Halfords were generally OK -safe and clean. ish
I've just spent my friday evening at the Kirkstall Labour branch social. Which is fine and good and it's nice to meet up with fellow party members outside of our myopic little branch....but Ed Milliband (secretary of state) was there and did a q&a session and it pissed me off. Christ, sometimes, I wouldn't vote for us.
I've just spent my friday evening at the Kirkstall Labour branch social. Which is fine and good and it's nice to meet up with fellow party members outside of our myopic little branch....but Ed Milliband (secretary of state) was there and did a q&a session and it pissed me off. Christ, sometimes, I wouldn't vote for us.
That happened to me yesterday actually. It wasn't a social, but a press conference.
:greenface
I'm still actually pretty pissed and made another move in a more positive direction, and quite frankly, the one that has been supported during press meetings, but voted against in private.
I've just spent my friday evening at the Kirkstall Labour branch social. Which is fine and good and it's nice to meet up with fellow party members outside of our myopic little branch....but Ed Milliband (secretary of state) was there and did a q&a session and it pissed me off. Christ, sometimes, I wouldn't vote for us.
Don't get discouraged, Dana. It's hard to get more than three people to agree where to go for dinner, much less how to run a community. That's why compromise will always be part of politics.
We can tell from your postings that you are trying to make a difference in your bit of the world. That's more than most can say. Just keep slugging.
i have applied for my 15th rental property and with about 20 people at each open inspection, i dont like my odds.
Business Op for you SG -set up a a family friendly garage. Although IIRC, places like Halfords were generally OK -safe and clean. ish
Nah, I know what I'm good at. I'm going to pimp myself out as a babysitter.
Our dog died thursday morning, just before I left to work.
He was old (14 years) we've had him since he was 1 year old, his owner had left him on the street because he was epileptic and he did'nt want to spend any money on him.
He was such a good dog, our kids have played with him and even do they where annoying with him, he never ever hurt them.
He was sick for the last 2 years, the Vet did'nt understand what was his problem but he found out that if he took antibiotics he stopped vomiting and was living an almost normal life so we kept him on the antibiotics for the last 2 years.
Wednesday he was'nt feeling good, I had to take him in my arm to move him around the house, he was a fairly big dog (80 pounds)
The Vet could'nt see him on wednesday nite and my wife was supposed to go to the Vet on thursday morning. She slept beside him on the floor of the living room and at 5 in the morning he died in her arms.
The house is so empty without him around, we miss him so much.
Oh Bill, I am so sorry. At least he was with your wife when he died, safe at home and with familiar smells and sounds. Far better than a final trip to the vets.
Such small comfort though. You have my sympathy.
My sympathy Bill - and the same for all your family.
He lived a good life, and as Dana said, he died a good death.
Take your time to grieve, it's important.
Sorry for your loss.
So sorry to hear of your loss, Bill. Take time to grieve, as SG said. The smiles at all the goods times you had together will come back with time.
Bummer, good friends are hard to part with. :(
Do you have a picture you could post, Bill?
I don't think SG posted anything stupid. I think her expectations are reasonable. She and everyone else should expect to be able to put things in places and expect parents to keep their children away from them if they're not for children to play with.
No one's children are perfect, and kids don't need to be beaten in order to learn that some things are not for them to play with. It's not about the children even. It's about the parents. If you don't control your child when you're in public, that's your problem, not the childs. Take them home and let them wreck your stuff.
That's all.
Our dog died thursday morning, just before I left to work.
He was old (14 years) we've had him since he was 1 year old, his owner had left him on the street because he was epileptic and he did'nt want to spend any money on him.
He was such a good dog, our kids have played with him and even do they where annoying with him, he never ever hurt them.
He was sick for the last 2 years, the Vet did'nt understand what was his problem but he found out that if he took antibiotics he stopped vomiting and was living an almost normal life so we kept him on the antibiotics for the last 2 years.
Wednesday he was'nt feeling good, I had to take him in my arm to move him around the house, he was a fairly big dog (80 pounds)
The Vet could'nt see him on wednesday nite and my wife was supposed to go to the Vet on thursday morning. She slept beside him on the floor of the living room and at 5 in the morning he died in her arms.
The house is so empty without him around, we miss him so much.
I'm really sorry about your puppy dog Bill. A pet that's been with you its whole life is irreplaceable. Again, I'm really sorry for your loss.
She and everyone else should expect to be able to put things in places and expect parents to keep their children away from them if they're not for children to play with.
Absolutely. But if your competitor provides an environment that doesn't cause unecessary difficulties for parents with very small children, you may also expect to lose their business.
The whole issue of "control your child" ignores the very important fact that they are relatively new on the planet and have limited experience. They may not be malevolent harbingers of doom, they might be a little uncoordinated, or so interested in some fantastic shiny thing that they forget they need to pee until they no longer need to pee.
Yes, there are parents who are completely whipped by their kids, but it is important to remember that children are a force of nature and they have actual needs beyond food clothing shelter and love. They need stimulation, play, exploration, touch, etc. they need to explore the world through their five senses.
Obviously they can't go anywhere they like and that's where parenting comes in. Distract and deflect are two great techniques, but there are times when, because of circumstances, that won't work.
There are a lot of shitty parents out there. But if you have a business that isn't a singles bar, and it services mini vans, let's say, you can expect that a kid is going to come into your store at some point.
Where am I going?
You're right, that's why they should be muzzled, and leashed, in public. :vikingsmi
my car had a goddamn flat, and I was stranded in the Target parking lot in 100 degree heat. AAA said they'd come right out -- in 2 hours.
This, right after I took it in last week, and the tires were rotated. When I picked it up, the same tire was flat. They said, it was the valve, but they fixed it.
Apparently not.
Now it really does look I'll need all new tires. fuck.
Sounds like what you really need is a new mechanic. You've told more than a few stories about them that really don't add up.
different mechanics, though. The whole tire thing is really pissing me off.
and did I mention I HATE car trouble stuff?
What kind of rims? Aluminum ones can get bent slightly and tires develop slow leaks.
Steel rims on older cars can get rust which needs to be wire brushed off, sometimes they can get cracks. Could be bad valve or poor repair.
I've also had flat tire jags where I've had five or six in a row.
sucks. AAA are as useless as tits on a bull imho
I think aluminum rims. Maybe I should get all new wheels--if I size up isn't that supposed to improve handling? Don't wanna put silk purses on the sow, though.
Rims can be expensive. Larger tires, on the same rims, will improve handling, but I doubt you drive in a way that you'd notice any difference.
Larger tires will be heavier which will degrade the ride quality. They would likely offer more rolling resistance, which decreases mileage, also.
Maybe what you need is better (read, more expensive) tires. There's a reason $150 tires cost more than $60 tires, besides greed. Sometimes the more expensive tires are cheaper in the long run, also.
That said, price alone is not a guarantee of a better tire. Places like Consumer Reports, often available at the library, can tell you what to watch for.
Yeah, I think I got crappy tires because I tried to economize. I've already printed out the list of recommended tires from CR, and am going to try to shop around to see if I can get some for a good deal.
Really? There's a big plastic playhouse, a TV, AND a woman's restroom where I get my Jeep fixed...
Ditto at our workshop.
Toys, LCD TV with built in DVD player, with an assortment of kid friendly DVDS, trashy girlie magazines, Tea/Coffee facilities, as well as everything for the men folk.
and am going to try to shop around to see if I can get some for a good deal
http://www.tirerack.com/
ships directly to your mechanic
I scoped that site out already. But I'm a little concerned--one, won't my local tire places be pissed that I bought tires someplace else, and two--if something happens to a tire (like what happened this weekend); it's not as if I can just roll in there and ask for help or replacement.
lol! That happened to me the other day Cloud! My car stopped in the left hand lane of a busy intersection. That was fantastic. I also forgot my cell phone that day. I ran to a pay phone that did not work, with my car still in the middle of the street. I ran some more and found some kids in a parking lot holding cell phones and paid them 50 cents to make a call to my husband. So the car sat there for about 30 minutes and then it luckily started and I was able to drive it out of the intersection. It was the fuel pump that went out.....
I got that fixed but then was stranded in my work parking lot because of the transmission. I have been lucky to figure out that it is just the dipstick that needs replacing because the car won't go anywhere or hesitates with air in the line. So now I get stuck and have to adjust the dipstick when it gets out of whack while driving. A new one has to be ordered from alb. I am hoping it is just the dipstick. It seems to be so, because every time I adjust it, the car works perfectly again. Maybe there is a sensor? Dunno.
About your tire, yes I would go local and get the warranty in case they fix it and it needs to be repaired quickly on their dime.
http://www.nokiantires.com/en/DEFAULT.ASPX
Worth every penny. Get dedicated snows and summer tires.
I went to visit Rhoda's grave this morning. First, they had the plot under her mother's name...her mother is very much alive. Apparently, that was a clerical error. Then I found the site...an unmarked plot in the middle of calf-high grass.
She deserves better than that.
I'm sorry to hear that, Syc. I hope you straightened them out.
Sorry that it was a more difficult experience for you than it should have been.
How long has it been now - perhaps the family are saving for a stone?
Rhoda died 18 months ago...Christmastime 2006.
I'm not sure what the situation is. Her family did pretty well financially, though they didn't have money out the wazoo. And I only know a little of what happened in the last year of her life: a mini-stroke, a leg amputation and the death of her dad three weeks before her own...he's buried in a Vets' Cemetery about 10 miles away from her.
I am almost certain that no malicious intent is involved. But it just killed me to see the grave in that state. If you put someone in the ground like that, they deserve to be noted. To see her grave like that made it seem like she was alone and forgotten. I believe that she's in Heaven, but her physical remains are still here on Earth...and they deserve to be respected.
The situation ate at me until about mid-afternoon...then I decided to go back out there.
I went over to a Wal-Mart near the cemetery and bought some fake Black-Eyed Susans and a vase. She liked the flowers because they reminded her of home...they're the state flower of Maryland. I then attached a few small momentos that I brought with me from St. Louis.
Before:
After:
That's better.
I'm not sure who Rhoda is, and I'm sorry for your grief, but . . . I wouldn't mind being buried in that field. Even without a marker.
Cemetery mixups are more common than you might think. My mom was buried in the wrong grave, and we eventually dug her up, cremated her, and moved her remains.
Rhoda is my ex-fiance who
passed away in December 2006. We split up in March 2005.
She used to post as LadySycamore.
Syc I see you point having seen the photos.
I was imagining an English cemetary, where the dead are laid out in individual plots and the grounds are maintained. I just pictured grass on her individual grave.
I agree it seems a shame to decide on a burial and then just leave the body with no marker.
Good for you for marking her passing, and her resting place.
In some ways it seems a shame....but in another way it seems a little poetic. Like she's truly gone back to nature. She is the field now.
You've done right by her Syc. You're a good man.
Thanks, ladies.
I just want to stress though...I was very self-conscious about putting this stuff up (both here and at The Bosque). I hope it doesn't come across as me trying to be some over-the-top do-gooder..."Look at what I did! Aren't I awesome?!"
Rhoda and I weren't on bad terms per se when she died, though we hadn't spoken in almost a year. I had no ill will towards her. And though it was painfully obvious that we weren't meant to be together, I still love her a great deal...I mean, shit, we spent 6 years together and lived together for most of that time.
Paying my respects was one of the main things I wanted to do on this trip. I didn't go to her funeral because 1) I broke my ankle the day after she died and 2) I wasn't sure that my presence would be welcomed, and I didn't want to fuck up her special day. When I saw that grave, I felt like it wasn't right and that it needed to be "fixed." So I did both...and now I'm at peace.
I just want to stress though...I was very self-conscious about putting this stuff up (both here and at The Bosque). I hope it doesn't come across as me trying to be some over-the-top do-gooder..."Look at what I did! Aren't I awesome?!"
Not even for a for a moment m'dear.
You did the right thing, syc. :)
Crap. I didn't know ladysycamore died.
This job. Specifically how we have back-pedaled to jumping through hoops for people who have waited until the last minute, which flies in the face of regs saying we can treat no student differently than any other, imho. I feel like a trained bear riding a tricycle and ringing the bell. Also, everything gets out of whack and I get behind on people who have been waiting patiently, and make mistakes because in this job consistency is SO important, and then my boss will email me and ask where I am in processing because Susie filled out her FAFSA yesterday, is getting kicked out of her apartment, needs new tires, is pregnant, has fibromyalgia, and a bad case of the acne.
OMG as I was writing this I got a forward of a voicemail from a whiny ass student bitch from my BOSS. It took everything I had not to tell her to go fuck herself.
Oh, and the IRS can kiss my ass. Since I don't get 15 grand in earned income credit and I don't believe in using the tax system as a savings account my total tax liability always leaves me owing a little each year. Because I won't let the gubmint mismanage my money one more second than I have to, I do not mail my return and check until the 15th of April. Therefore, since there was no direct deposit information because I don't get money back, I fell into the group of folks who not only didn't get the fucking Stimulus Payment (aks STress Payment) in May with direct deposits, since the IRS did not have my return to process before the 15th I am now almost 2 weeks past the date I was to get the money due to the last 2 numbers in my social security number. STill not in my mail as of today.
I mean it's free money and all, but I thought that just for once in my whole freaking life a single working adult with no dependents wouldn't get fucked in the ass by every government agency on earth.
The day started out pretty well...:(
I have to go to an executive meeting. I really, really don't want to. I want to stay at home and watch Youtube......don't wanna be all on guard and ready for attacks....don't wanna be watching for the subtext on everything that gets said. Must. Not. Lose. Temper. This. Time.
Pah!
just as my shoulder was getting better i refucked it last night --twice-- left me kneeling at the foot of the stairs. Now in a sling debating the merits of vicodin, percocet, hydrocone, alleve, and some "muscle relaxer" my sil gave me.
Also typing one handed, despite all my practice, it's slow going since I one handed type w/ the other hand.
...i refucked it last night --twice-- left me kneeling at the foot of the stairs ...
I think I could get a poem out of that...
I personally have other body parts in mind when I'm of a mind to fuck something, but hey, if shoulders are your thing, it's no business of mine.
I think I could get a poem out of that...
Maybe dar could write music to it...
At least your humor isn't broken
A particular person I am forced to deal with on a semi-regular basis has officially crossed the line from irritating to genuinely, clinically, batshit insane (yeah, look it up in the DSM-IV.)
My stepson has supposedly begun washing his hands overly frequently, and what's more, doing so in a secretive manner. This worries said Batshit Insane Person. We pointed out to BIP that in fact both the kids have always been freaky about washing their hands, and this is predictable since she herself is a germ-phobe and is constantly drilling into them the need to wash their hands and never touch "dirty" things. She denied that she is a germ-phobe, and insisted it is perfectly reasonable to encourage hand-washing
1.) after using the bathroom,
2.) before meals,
3.) after meals,
4.) upon arriving home from school, and
5.) whenever one uses the computer.
WTF? Yes, BIP has taken to heart all the typical local-news scare articles about how the computer keyboard is the germiest thing in the average person's house. The children must wash their hands every time they touch it.
So, she's making the kids wash their hands a minimum of 8-10 times a day--and also enforces such behaviors as never touching the kitchen garbage can, and opening/closing the bathroom door with one's elbows instead of hands, not just in public but at home--and yet she sees no connection between this and a child who has begun to compulsively wash his hands at additional times?
No, there is no connection. We are being accusatory and looking to pin blame, obviously. Because it isn't just handwashing, see! He has also been discovered "spraying down" his toys.
What the hell does she mean, "spraying down?"
Oh, you know, with the sanitizer spray.
And why does a kindergartener have access to sanitizer spray?
Because it's in the bedroom. Because she, Batshit Insane Person, sprays down all of the child's possessions about once a week. Only once a week! That's completely reasonable, and nothing like the child doing it himself at times other than times she has deemed necessary!
She honest-to-god, cross-her-heart-and-hope-to-die, sees no connection whatsoever between her actions and this child's behavior. She is in fact shocked that we would suggest she is doing harm, either physical or psychological, by "protecting" the children as such.
Hay-zeus Creesto.
I just learned today that our electric company will be raising rates by 18% next month.
18 fucking percent!
Does your company have a deal where you can lock in rates if you commit to two years of service, or anything? Ours has several different "plans" you can choose from.
I think so. In years past, I've ignored those schemes, but I should really look into them now. (Should have seen this coming and looked into them six months ago.)
I was surprised from the article to see that coal costs have gone up 95% in the last year. We're almost all coal in this region.
Eek, Clod! Hygiene is one thing, but I hope you can ward off the incipient OCD stuff.
I just learned today that our electric company will be raising rates by 18% next month.
18 fucking percent!
glatt, what does that work out to in actual dollars? I'm curious what other's pay for electricity. Over the last 12 months, our electric bills have been between $25 and $39 for 197 to 336 kWh. An 18% increase would mean an additional $6 per month, on average. I imagine that if you have air conditioning or electric heat your costs might be significantly higher.
We have gas heat, and electric A/C, water heater, and all major appliances. Our electric bills are about $130-$150 in the winter, $250-$275 in the summer.
Our gas bill is probably a lot lower than yours though.
Bad washing machine design...
We have gas heat, and electric A/C, water heater, and all major appliances. Our electric bills are about $130-$150 in the winter, $250-$275 in the summer.
Our gas bill is probably a lot lower than yours though.
Our gas bill over the last 12 months has ranged from $17.17 in August (most of that was the Service and Facility fee of $10.65) to a high of $152.33 in February. If my wife controlled the thermostats the bills would be a lot higher.
We have an electric dryer, gas heat and hot water (actually a side-arm water heater) and a gas grill.
*Takes a swig of his clean nuclear energy*
I think ours averages out at about $40 a month.
And the heating is gas so that goes on top.
No A/C of course, but it is only a (very small) 2 bedroom house. I think that's quite high, personally.
Not helped by our differing hours at the moment, making it nearly a 24 hour house same days.
My electric is about £40 per month (but that includes paying off a debt) and Gas is about £50 per month.
BIP needs some reality checked slipped into her breakfast cereal. H Mackerel.
We couldn't get the inch to wash hands we tried explaining to him thathe could get sick if he didn't wash his hands after using the toilet. (I am sure we mentioned pooping) Eventually we found out that interpreted the talk to mean He shouldn't touch his penis or he would get sick. Discovered that after he nearly flipped out on me when I was taking a leak, almost like that line from time bandits: "Dad! Don't touch it; it's EVIL!"
He is now no longer afraid to touch his "special purpose" but he also isn't too keen on hand washing.
But what's irritating me today is just a lot of stuff.
"special purpose"? :eek:
Navin: Is it getting hot in here?
Navin (suddenly yelling in a mixture of shock and excitement): Wait a minute - what's happening to my special purpose!?
Patty (in a passionate voice): What's your special purpose?
Navin (still yelling): Well, when I was a kid my mom told me... there goes my special purpose! And someday I'd find out what my special purpose was!
Patty: Today's the day!
ah. thanks. I think. :lol:
1 ) getting yelled at for Not Babysitting a 60+ year old dude that has been the Same business for 30+ years , I didn't have time and told my boss before hand .
2 ) Spastic ass customer supervisors that have my cell phone Number , calling 10 times in a row , for the same Problem , its an IT problem . I am a Scale tech NOT a Network Geek !!!!!
3) Not winning the Fucking Power ball so I don't have to Listen to , or put up with this stuff !!!!!
That is All at this time
[passes ZippyT a cold beer]
AHHHHH !!!!
Thanks Limey that helps ;)
I knew there was a reason I liked Flint.
and that upsets me.
I think someone (could be you) should start a who's who (or a who's whom) thread explaining the merits and demerits of each dwellar so those of us who have been out of the loop or are part timers can quickly research exactly what kind of nut(s) we are dealing with.
E.g. Maybe there is something I don't know about Flint that I should...
Maybe there is something I don't know about Flint that I should...
I will buttfuck you in the mouth.
:rotflol: great work Glatt.
3 foot, Flint is a sick, nasty bastard. And that makes him perfect for the cellar, he's a good egg. I was just messing with you. The only guy you want to avoid is that Undertoad dude. he's a bully. just picks on people for no reason at all.;)
I am having the shittiest fucking day. That is all.
No, wait, that's not all. The shittiness is compounded because I can't tell Mr. Clod about the bulk of it or he'll just get upset too, which will be worse for me in the long run. And I really, really, really need a nap right now, but I can't take one because I'm too worked up to sleep. And the kids are taunting me about this by both being peacefully asleep at the same time.
Damn, Clodfobble. Sorry about that.
And all I have to complain about is this jackhammer that's been running about 10 feet behind my office. All day.
Sorry, Clod!
Hang in there.
Kittens going in for spaying/neutering and all the other baby cat malarky tomorrow. Love them so much already don't want to put them through it, but it has to be done and the younger the better/easier....
I just learned today that our electric company will be raising rates by 18% next month.
18 fucking percent!
I'll see your 18 percent and raise you 20 percent.
Xcel Energy's residential customers will see a 38 percent increase in their electricity bills starting in July.
From
here.
I don't know if that's a local increase or a national increase for Xcel's customers.
My Uncle has pre-cancerous cells in his throat.
Apparently he has been suffering from Barratt's Syndrome (aka Barratt's Oesophagus) for years and now has extensive scarring to his throat, putting him at greater risk of throat cancer. The risk is only increased, it is still a small percentage I hasten to add.
It's good, because it's been diagnosed and will be watched from now on.
But Mum suffers badly from reflux, and has done for a long time. She ticks all the boxes (except she's not a smoker and never has been). She's going to mention it to her GP next time she goes. I worry she might have it too and I'm not sure our healthcare system is as efficient as Australia's - she's never been checked despite being 13 years old than Jim. Also it explains why she is in pain from it so often - I had hoped it would just go away at some point.
And finally I suffer badly from reflux. Yes, it's mostly my own fault. But there's the added worry now that I'm not just ending up in pain, I'm creating ideal conditions for cancer. Not over-dramatising, I know the risk is still low. It's just potentially higher than it was before, given that this is a genetic condition.
Sigh. I'm upset mostly for Mum. It's her baby brother after all and so far away.
I'll see your 18 percent and raise you 20 percent.
From here.
I don't know if that's a local increase or a national increase for Xcel's customers.
CRAP! Arg.
I am sorry about your woes, Clod. :(
It's okay, I'm better today. I did end up telling Mr. Clod about the crap from yesterday, but only after hemming and hawing about how it was only going to upset him, so he was basically obligated not to get upset. :) I'm no good at keeping stuff to myself anyway.
The hemming and hawing is useful sometimes. Glad to hear you got it off your chest.
First Uncle Jim, now my sister.
Anyone else in my family want to go into hospital?
Excerpt from Mum's email that I picked up this morning (names replaced of course):
L is in hospital. We took her in just after 7pm to Ward 7 - Plastics and Hand Ward. She is having an operation either tonight or in the morning. She injured her hand last night trying to separate frozen chops. The knife went in her hand. Yes I know we have all done something stupid like this and got away with it. She wasn't so lucky.
G wanted her to go to SMH [local hospital] last night but she didn't think it was bad enough. Just a tiny wound. This morning her hand has swollen up. At school she showed it to a First Aider and was advised seeing a nurse or going to A & E [Accident & Emergency].
L waited until after lunch as they had the Schools Inspectors in and she didn't want to let the class down. She popped down to the old Elmhurst Surgery to see a nurse. Found it closed on a Wed afternoon so came to us to arrange for us to pick up [the children] and arrange their teas while she went to A & E.
At SMH she had a long wait. They called a plastic surgeon down from the ward and he wanted to admit her then and there. She and G had 4 houses to view tonight so she said she couldn't stay then. He told her to come back to ward 7 (in the new hospital) after 7pm and bring overnight clothes. She still thought she would be coming home when we took her to the ward.
G phoned a while ago to say she has been admitted. We were waiting for a call to collect her tonight. The hand is infected. She is on antibiotics and they need to open up the hand. G is very upset that she will get more infections in there. He said L sounded very upset at not coming home and they didn't have a bed on the ward, so God knows where she will end up.
second email:
L had her op in the early hours. She texted G just after 04.00 to say she was back on the ward. Has a drip up for the antibiotics and hand heavily bandaged in a sling to keep it upright so it drains.
She has texted me twice and I phoned her. She sounds tired and of course worried about the kids and G coping.
They cleaned out the infection and she has nicked two tendons. L has been told she will be in hospital again tonight. They may have to take her down again to wash the hand out if the wound still looks infected.
Update.
The balloons she refers to are the balloon bouquet I sent. They don't allow flowers on that ward.
L looked well this afternoon and the balloons looked great, blowing all over the place. Thousands of brownie points there. Her hand was stinging but not painful. Nothing more said about going back to theatre. See what they say Friday (I'm typing this Thursday evening), but they told her she would be there till Saturday anyway. They want to keep an eye on her. I suppose if the bed were needed for something more serious they would let her go, but it's better she stays or she will be using the hand running around after the children. G looked awful when he came home from work. Shell-shocked. He brought home pizza for their tea. They had sausage and chips from the chip shop last night. A said "If mum stays in until Saturday can we have KFC Friday night". They are loving having take-aways. They usually only get them on holiday. Bugger that mum is in hospital after having an operation. Kids!
She seems to be out of danger. But in this country any hospital stay is always concerning because they usually want you out asap. They must have been quite concerned.
Not that I post here to get a response, but am a little disappointed that two of my family have health problems that I have been quite concerned about, and three days later no-one has even given me a "oh, that happened to my cousin Tom and he's a CEO of a multi-national with 16 children now..." anecdote.
S'okay. I'm getting by just worrying. It's an internet forum not a support group after all, I remember.
Oh, that happened to my cousin Tom and he's a CEO of a multi-national with 16 children now.
Sorry, Sundae--I was supporting you in my head, I promise. Sometimes I forget to actually type out reactions to posts. I do hope everyone starts feeling better very soon.
Well...I did once slice open my hand with a box cutter. Oh, and a chainsaw. Those weren't as bad as they sound, though.
I am very sorry, Sundae. :( I don't really have any specific experiences to relate to yours, but I sure hope your family members recover quickly.
I am just about ready to start shooting up heroin. My MIL has only been here about 10 hours and already she has tried to burn down the house. In one of her OCD beverage management moments she tried to turn the stove on.
Most people pour a cup of coffee from the coffee pot and drink it, maybe they add milk or half and half or a little sugar. She pours the coffee and then heats up milk and soy milk together then makes a 50/50 mix. OK fine. Then she takes two or three sips and adds some stevia. The she asks where the sugar is. I point to the ICONIC, if you have ever been in a diner in your entire life, sugar dispenser. She touches the dispenser and I say "Yes". She then moves her hand to a jar of garlic powder and asks "THIS?" No, the first thing you touched. She picks up the garlic powder. "Is this it?" "No, it's in the other jar, THE SUGAR DISPENSER, the one you just had your hand on." "Where's the other sugar? I thought you had brown sugar." "We're out, we need to get more."
Pours some sugar into her hand and walks back to the table and puts a small amount into her coffee and dumps the rest half on her plate and half on the table then dusts off her hands over the floor. Sure feed the ants, why not share the wealth?
By now the coffee has gotten cold so she goes up to the stove and again tries to light it to heat up water this time to thin down the coffee. She turns the burner on FULL past "Light" so propane starts to fill the kitchen. She turns it off agin. Then all the way on again, leaving the gas running she asks "Why won't this light?" I get up and walk over to the stove, turn off the gas and say "This stove doesn't have a pilot light, do you see the word 'light'? You turn the knob to 'light' and that lights the burner. Then you adjust the flame."
The inch asks what a pilot light is and I explain pilot lights vs piezo ignitors to him and he gets it. "The spark makes the gas go 'VOOOM'."
She is in automataton mode most of the time. Youliterally have to follow her around the kitchen. She wanted to make toast the other night and seeing the toaster was full, instead of waiting, like a normal person would do, she jsut shoved her bread down on top of the bread that was already in the toaster. The she wanted to heat up the last five tablespoons of soup in the pot so she (managed to) light the stove and put the burner on max and walked away. When she isn't busy trying to burn the house down or blow us all to smithereens she's rambling about The second world war and how thay have to steal potatoes and coal, etc etc.
She did arrive with a pile of gifts for the inch, as usual age innappropriate. Something for a person two years older than him with about 976 small chokable parts for his one year old sister to enjoy too. Nice going. And now dad (the buzzkill) has to explain why we aren't going to open all the bags of chokables so they can be spread all over the house. Thanks OMA.
Finally, this same woman who has had numerous car accidents caused by her dreamstate driving, wants to, are you ready?
Take the children somewhere in her car.
What the fucking fuck? We aren't even happy with her taking them around the block. Thank god she's too stupid to figure out how to install a car seat or she'd try to sneak them, I'm sure. The inch is almost reday for a booster seat, then we have to come up with plan B. She thinks we are unreasonable in not allowing her to drive them places. We think she is just dangerously inept and innattentive.
ok I'm done for now
Soz SG, started typing something as a response, then J arrived at my house and I closed the page intending to go back to it later.....then didn't:P
How's your mum? Is she coping okay? This must be a horrib;y worrying time for her.
3foot, dear God she sounds like a handful!
Foot, has she been examined by a doctor for Alzheimers? It sounds like she's not just a nuisance, she's incapable of living safely on her own. At least you seem to have Mrs. Foot onboard with the idea that her mother shall not take the children out alone, better to have her own daughter confronting her on these things.
Clod,
She doesn't need doctors because Jesus will take care of everything. Seriously. She once told me straight faced, when I mentioned I was looking for a career mentor, that Jesus would eb my mentor. I calmly explained that I was thinking more of someone who had photographic experience, she told me he could help me with that too-- it's in the bible...
More breaking news as events unfold-- I'm having a sanity break.
How long has she been this way, foot?
It sounds like she's not just a nuisance, she's incapable of living safely on her own.
I agree, she should live with her daughter. :bolt:
How long has she been this way, foot?
Since WWII, the big one. That's all we ever hear about it seems. Well that and The J man.
And Bruce, we know a charming little place in PA where we could send her:rolleyes:
...
She doesn't need doctors because Jesus will take care of everything. ...
Oh, now she's dragging me into this.
I just found out that my main (read: currently my only) contracting gig will be ending in August because the company is closing. I was under the impression it was at least moderately profitable, so I don't understand why the owner is choosing to dissolve everything instead of selling the business as a whole, but he was nice enough to give everyone plenty of notice, anyway. I'm not going to be as hard hit as any of the full-time employees, of course, but it'll still hurt. We've always budgeted the necessities as if we only had one income, since mine was unpredictable, but unpredictable is still better than nonexistent. Anyone got any voiceover needs, or a few thousand files they need edited and processed? :(
Not that I post here to get a response, but am a little disappointed blah blah blah
Sorry, I was very busy, tired and worrying about random family events and it made me pissy.
My sis was let out of hospital at the weekend - scary fact is that they warned her she might have lost at least partial use of her hand due to the infection. It was caught in time, but it scares me how a simple cut took hospital intervention within 24 hours and there was still a reasonable element of danger. Knives don't kill people, infections do - as it were.
Clod I'm really sorry to hear your news. Financial instability (even a rock of the boat) is always scary, and it must be much worse with children to consider. Here's hoping the J man is looking out for you as well as Foot's MIL. Apparently when he closes a door he opens a window. I do that if I've been in the bathroom a while too.
Seriously - fingers crossed.
Apparently when he closes a door he opens a window
My friend (and ex) D, always says, when one door closes there's another one waiting to slam shut in your face.......not sure that's particularly helpful, but there we go.
Politics is a dirty place. My good friend J has thrown her hat in the ring for the parliametary candidature for the neighbouring constituency. This means she is trying to get selected by the party to stand as the MP candidate in the next general election. her constituency and mine are 'twinned' so many of the main players are the same in both. The faction I've mentioned before and who make life very difficult in my constituency are also doing the same in hers. They would rather have our party lose the seat than win it with J as the candidate.
The selection fight has started to get nasty. The other faction have started leaking stuff to the press and generally undermining J in favour of another candidate. What upsets me is they have no reason at all to harbour such hatred towards her. Not only are they smearing her in the press they are slandering her to anyone who'll listen. I cannot understand the level of vitriol. I mean, I can understand them hating me.....I am absolutely their enemy and have (and will continue to) attacked them; though never in the press, I will always keep in behind the party doors. J has never done anything to any of them. She's a really lovely person.
you need to to obtain some very compromising photos of the b'stards.
wallet stolen
with everything save my soul and car keys in it
fack
filled out police report
gotta go to DMV tomorrow early to get new license
damnit
Aw thats shitty fresh, I hope it turns out OK and that the person who stole it gets boils all over their body, old testament style.
I think I have a blood sugar problem and I didn't eat enough today.
freshness, that's tough. I've lost my wallet twice and, luckily, found it again both times, most recently on Monday. It was sitting on the ground next to my motorcycle. Once I lost it in the ocean and my wife found it before I even knew it was gone. But it made me think what I'd have to go through to replace everything in there. Did you look on the ground next to your car?
Those were the next two places I was gonna search.
Got it stolen at the Lifetime Fitness Center I work out at yesterday. Musta dropped outta my pants or something while I changed...
But I'm pretty sure it's not there since my credit card had already been charged 300 dollars and attempted to be charged close to 1,000 in a mere 3 hours after I got it stolen..... Luckily called the plastic company and froze it all and won't have to pay for anything.
I had a AAA insurance card, BC/BS health insurance, +-20 bucks cash, my debit card and a shitload of giftcards.
Heading over to the DMV in about 25 minutes.
So not a big problem, but I'm going to watch my bills for a while and freakin' learn to lock all my shit up before I work out.
Rotten luck Fresh.
At least you cancelled it in time.
I lost my debit card without even knowing I'd lost it.
I called my bank to cancel it when I tried to withdraw some money at 21.00 that evening and realised it was lost.
I got home at 15.00 (I know because I switched the tv on and a certain programme was just starting).
It turned out that at 15.30 my card was used a mile away in Walthamstow to buy an electrical item worth just under £1000
I can only assume it fell out of my car in front of my house, and the wrong person went past at the wrong time, saw it and acted on it immediately.
They informed me a couple of weeks later about the transaction, which they had cancelled the next day, and I had to pay a £50 excess because I reported the loss after the purchase.
Three months later the bank fraud dept asked me for a crime number.
They claimed that I would be liable for the full amount after all, due to my late request to cancel the card and its subsequent use. They advised me it was "suspicious" that I hadn't reported the loss to the Police.
They told me to go to my local police station and report it retrospectively - despite living in a different city by then.
I tried - they were baffled and told me I must be confused. I was lucky they didn't laugh in my face.
When I called the bank back they reiterated that without a crime number (for a crime I didn't know was committed until later) I would have to refund them for the transaction they had written off.
Luckily my Mum worked for the police issuing those numbers at the time (albeit in a dufferent location) and she phoned them up on my behalf and set them straight.
I don't bank with them any more.
I swear to god, as I was typing
this, the following popped up on my screen.
Well, doubleshit. the error has vanished as well. ffs. starting over AGAIN.
fucking civic duty my ass. piece of shit trial judge announces a 4 week trial. tells people who are travelling for anniversaries, family vacations, etc to just reschedule. Another guy has devoted the last 18 months to prepping his company for launch... she tells him to delay it another month, no big deal. 3 of us stand up and explain that it isn't the loss of income for four weeks that is devastating (although that is bad enough) it's that we are each single person business owners and if we go away for a month there is a very real likelihood that the company will fold. Her response? Guess you need to hire someone quickly then. I further explain that my job is tied to market hours and I have to meet my clients during those times. Her response? If they're good clients they'll wait.
Fuck her and fuck the piece of shit on trial. 4 fucking weeks.
That is beyond suck. Sorry man. That's what you get for voting. :3_eyes:
Dude, that really blows. A lawyer friend of mine explained to me how to get out of being selected for jury duty something to the effect of spouting racist bigoted remarks which barely pertain to any questions asked of you. You may lose a day showing up for selection but you won't be selected.
Example:
Do you know either of these people?
Mr. X? Sounds like some cocksucking faggot jew/chink/nigger etc. name.Do I look like I'd know some faggot jew/chink/nigger etc.?
There all guilty as hell and should be sent back where they belong etc. etc.e tc.
Apparently you won't be asked to sit on jury duty.
I changed my voting registration and since then I haven't been asked once in many years.
That sucks lookout, I'm sorry. Sounds like it's time to invest in a Blackberry and keep constant email communication going throughout the proceedings.
That might get you dismissed... hopefully.
That sucks lookout, I'm sorry. Sounds like it's time to invest in a Blackberry and keep constant email communication going throughout the proceedings.
I'm sure it depends on the court, or possibly even the judge, but when I did jury duty earlier this year, we were under strict orders to have our phones OFF. Not silent, not on vibrate, but off. And when it came time to actually deliberate, the bailiffs collected them.
Sorry for you Lookout.
One of our Sales Managers (in a previous job) was in the same situation. He lucked out in that "his" trial was only two days in the end. May it happen for you.
Just as an aside.
I've wanted to be on jury duty since I hit 18.
I've never been self employed and only once been on bonuses that would make it hard for me to miss work.
I was summonsed. Once. The week before I left London for Leicester - all plans made, not working, moving out date agreed with landlord, employment agencies in Leicester contacted. And they called me for jury duty. I could have cried.
Of course I had to advise them I couldn't attend as I wouldn't be living in the area on the date of the summons. I asked for a deferral but I was given a (? cancellation?) because of the change in geography. Sigh.
Don't get me wrong - I really like the job I'm in at present. I'd probably come in every evening just to catch up and be involved. I'd just love the chance to be part of a court case.
I'm sure it depends on the court, or possibly even the judge, but when I did jury duty earlier this year, we were under strict orders to have our phones OFF. Not silent, not on vibrate, but off. And when it came time to actually deliberate, the bailiffs collected them.
When I showed for jury duty earlier this year, cell phones were banned from the courthouse. Couldn't even make it through front door security with one. Fuckers.
That sucks lookout, I'm sorry. Sounds like it's time to invest in a Blackberry and keep constant email communication going throughout the proceedings.
Or you could play sudoku...
http://www.news.com.au/mercury/story/0,22884,23845830-921,00.html
how can I make my text into a link or vice versa? I forgot while I was away.
how can I amke my text into a link or vice versa? I forgot while I was away.
Highlight the text and then click the little blue globe button
to fill in the address.
I would like to point out for the record that I'm not some dickwad that refuses to serve or thinks my job is more important than another person's. I have served on two juries in the past. Both less than a week. I was fully willing to sacrifice another few days for this. But realistically 4 weeks + deliberations wouldn't just hurt my personal funds it would put my business in real danger. Clients aren't all that understanding of their money manager being gone for a month, for any reason.
I don't think a person is a dickwad for wanting to preserve his business rather than serve the judicial system of an administration which has amply shown it won't bail him out when his business fails and he is bankrupt. Unless of course his business has members of the current administration, or their families on its board of directors, in which case, you would be bailed out when you went bankrupt and you also wouldn't have to serve jury duty either, nor would you have to serve in the military.
So, no I don't think you are a dickwad for wanting to earn a living rather than be a drain on our country's allready tapped finances.
And on another totally unrelated topic, nuke a gay whale for christ!
(Do I sound bitter and cynical? I'm don't feel bitter and cynical)
I wouldn't judge someone because being on jury service had a negative impact on their livelihood.
I think it would bring a negative attitude to the process of justice.
Of course it is important that successful and well paid people also serve - it just seems a shame that you can't get some sort of dispensation for having served twice before.
I'll come and pretend to be you if you like?
I'll just need airfare and a dialogue coach
Highlight the text and then click the little blue globe button to fill in the address.
!!! I've been typing [ url="*" ] text [ /url ].
That'll work too. If you're old school.
I'm happy now because I've just been released, but the whole process has left me a bit angry.
This morning I was threatened with contempt of court and warned about my attitude and lack of respect. I explained how I felt I was showing the exact amount of respect needed for someone willing to allow small business owners suffer and go out of business with a wave of their hand because they've lost touch with the world just outside their doors. I still didn't get dismissed for that though.
The judge continued the questioning right up until the point that I said I thought it was a travesty that I would be forced to sit in a courtroom for four weeks watching my business fall apart before I could say "Guilty".
The defendent about shit himself and I was dismissed shortly afterwards.
lookout, I'm glad you got out of it. Jury duty is something I support, and I've done it twice, but it shouldn't have a life altering impact on the jurors.
Agreed. And on that note, I find it really hard to believe that any court case really needs to take four weeks, let alone the many many months some of them drag on for.
I've been dismissed and can talk about the case now. I won't mention the scumbag's name although legally I can. A middle age douchebag who has 48 counts (over nearly two years) of sexual contact with minors including intercourse with his biological daughter and videotaping the whole damn thing has decided to represent himself. He isn't denying that he did his daughter or her friends or that he taped it... he is arguing there is nothing wrong with what was done. He produced a list of expected witnesses three pages long. Due to the number of witnesses, the douchebag is expected to need at least 3 weeks while the prosecution plans to stand up and say "Mr Douchebag stuck his disgusting little wanker inside his own daughter and her underage friends and videotaped it." Case closed.
Shoot the fucker in the back of the head and leave his nasty corpse to rot on the front steps of the courthouse as a lesson to other shitbirds who are thinking about diddling their daughters.
That is why it is scheduled to be a four week trial.
The judge continued the questioning right up until the point that I said I thought it was a travesty that I would be forced to sit in a courtroom for four weeks watching my business fall apart before I could say "Guilty".
Nicely played. Next time just register Libertarian. I've never been called, although I'm tempted to change registration now that I have the summer off and wouldn't mind serving.
I'm registered as independent. They say it is random, but I know it isn't. /adjusting tinfoil cap/ I get picked "randomly" every 19-24 months. After you serve you have and 18 month safety window.
I know people who have lived here for twenty years and have never received a summons. I also know people who've received them and thrown them away with no ill effect.
I've never served and generally been an Ind or Lib.
Upsetting thing: Pete's step-Dad, great guy/brilliant mind but he's going all doom and gloom. He believes without reservation every environmental disaster theory and doesn't believe the next couple generations of humans have the foresight to "save" the world.:(
I don't buy the end of the world doom and gloom but I'm a huge believer in cycles. I firmly believe that the US has passed the positive points for our cycle. The only real question is whether we go the route of England in staying an international power (albeit with less influence) or France who still believes they are the center of the universe and piss on anyone who disagrees.
I've only been called once... you can report in online, and one of the standard boxes is "are you the sole daytime care provider for a child under the age of 10?" Check yes, and you are automatically out. Maybe it's not the same in Arizona, but if you pick him up right after school for soccer practice, I think it counts.
doesn't work in arizona. she refused to dismiss a couple of single parents, even one who works hourly with no vacation and no family in town to pick up the child. she had to drop her son off at the boys and girls club to even report in.
The navy. It can't expect me not to be pissed when it takes my friend away. I have a revenge plan though...
it might help you to be less upset if you try to remember that your friend chose to go away for a short time so others don't have to go away against their will via the draft. or it might not.
i've sometimes found that altering my perception of an event helps me to cope with it. the people with the white jackets say that makes me insane. I prefer to just run faster than them and consider myself flexible.;)
Trying to get ready for a camping trip when Ive never camped before...ever...ever ever.
it might help you to be less upset if you try to remember that your friend chose to go away for a short time so others don't have to go away against their will via the draft. or it might not.
I know you're completely right, and I'm being very irrational. In some cases you just can't help yourself though.
Trying to get ready for a camping trip when Ive never camped before...ever...ever ever.
Let us help. what sort of trip? ...how long, where, what type of camping, what type of activities....
Well....its a camping ground at Dale Hollow Lake in Tennessee for 5 nights. Hubby has been going to it with his family since he was a toddler. You would think that he would be more upfront with good advice but he keeps telling me not to worry about it. Ha!
We are sleeping in tents...so I did make him go get an air mattress, but Im not really sure what to pack for PJ's. Does it get cold in a tent at night? So far the forecast is calling for 90 degree weather...? Im the type of person who likes to pack for all contingencies, but there is going to be a problem with space. Also...how do you pack for eats (breakfast and lunch) when keeping food cold is a problem and we arent grilling?
Mostly we will be on a boat while others on it are skiing and tubing...(Not us - we have back problems). And...Hubby has promised me that we will separate from the pack to do some hiking once or twice.
Thats it for starters.
Pico , all you need is a tshirt to sleep in , swim in etc,,,
Cooler of beer
oh and bug spray !!
Just kidding , go have fun , DON'T Stress !!!
Oh and Pics are Mandatory !!!!!!
you will be plenty warm. take cotton sheets to sleep under as well as sleeping bags. if it gets really hot and humifd you'll be more comfortable on the sleeping bags rather than in them, but you'll want something on you. Plan ro sleep in undies and t-shirt if not nekkid, is generally not worth the effort of changing.
Get a decent-sized cooler, buy ice on a regular basis. We take cereal, disposable bowls and spoons and milk in the cooler.
oh yes... zippy got it -BUG SPRAY
it looks like a nice place Pico
Pics there will be...that is if I remember to get the battery and film for my camera tomorrow...my nice digital is broke so I'm gonna take my little point and shoot. Thanks for the sheets suggestion Monster. Its a great idea and it never occurred to me.
Bug spray I did think of...I hate mosquitos!
we but water bed sheets on our king sized air matres ,they are JUST right
oh yes... zippy got it -BUG SPRAY
and sunscreen! I think they make sunscreen w/ bug spray in it...or bug spray w/ sunscreen in it...
Hiking? Comfortable shoes and pants or long socks at least.
A good thing I like to take to eat out camping are foil packets. Favorite meats (already cooked), veggies, butter and some spices. Place 'em in the edge of the fire and they'll heat nicely, can eat 'em right out of the foil. They should stay fine in the cooler, just keep the foil tight and store 'em in a ziploc.
Also staying clean can sometimes be an issue, its convenient to take along towelets you can wipe down with, there are special ones for your backside too.
Don't worry too much! There's always a Wal-Mart nearby to save you.
Ive been told that even getting ice will be a challenge...not easy to come by and expensive, but I will tuck away the foil packet idea for future use...its a good one.
get some 1/2 gallon milk jugs , fill with water , freeze , they hold for a few days , and make water when they melt
Damn. Shoot, should have thought of that. No time now.
quart jugs work well to,
Carol keeps 7-8 of them in the freezer at all times ( A full freezer is WAY more efficent than empty one )
I have purple hair that I wasn't planning on.
And there are two toned, tanned, topless men outside my house and all I can think of is.... why couldn't they dig up the pavement tomorrow when I'm at work?!
Not into eye candy really, more bothered by having to have the blinds drawn so I can wander about in my knickers before getting ready for work at the pub.
Unnatural woman that I am.
Two-toned? Tell them to leave their shirts on at work, can't be sporting a farmer tan in public.
[SIZE=1]Pics there will be...that is if I remember to get the battery and[/SIZE] [SIZE=3]film[/SIZE] f[SIZE=1]or my camera tomorrow...my nice digital is broke so I'm gonna take my little point and shoot. Thanks for the sheets suggestion Monster. Its a great idea and it never occurred to me.
Bug spray I did think of...I hate mosquitos![/SIZE]
Film??? Be still my beating heart...:blush:
I have purple hair.
Awesome :D
and surprises are always nice....
That I'm getting used to (the positive reaction from the pub helped)
new problem
it's The Day of the Ants Today
have closed the windows but still finding the flying buggers everywhere
euch
I'm sure it didn't used to happen this early in the year before
My wife gave me her cold. And I have to go to work regardless of my illness. Ugg.
Not now, but earlier.
I had a rotten hangover all day.
I worked through it at both jobs of course.
But it was grim.
Far, far, far more than was healthy or sensible last night.
Never again.
Well, I had to go to the bathroom, you know, one of those emergencies. Of course, there's someone in there putting on freaking makeup. I try and wait as long as possible, but noooo, my butt has to let go a big ole diarrhea fart and whoosh into the toilet. It couldn't wait 10 more seconds until I was alone. And of course, her office is right across the hall from my cube so I get to see her all day.....*sigh*
I feel your pain bbro. Used to happen to me all the time in a previous workplace. Especially when I had an evil belly on me and went in there just to fart (because they were too toxic to let slip in the office).
Great book though V!
Ha, Ha, thanks BigV.
SG - at one place I used to work at, my cube was right by the bathroom. I heard EVERYTHING in there. I never pooped there if I could help it.
Far, far, far more than was healthy or sensible last night.
Never again.
I've heard and said that before as well. :D
o shit
lookout belooooooooooooow!
Tell you what.
The Pizza Express pizza I had for dinner was well named.
Etna.
I think it may have had red jalapenos on it.
This
previous post describes what happened before and pretty much what is going on right now.
I'm going to need some ice cream.
ETA - it's not red jalapenos. I guess I have another pepper to steer clear of!
Etna:
An eruption of flavours, scorching hot soft salami from Calabria, sweet fiery roquito peppers and smokey speck ham; finished with grated grana padano
Don't get me wrong, I love spicy food and don't often suffer this way. Just occasionally something that doesn't taste all that hot on the way in really irritates my system. And hurts like buggery on the way out.
My family is annoying the hell out of me.
Thats what they are there for Steve.
Mrs. S had to serve on jury duty this week. Sat around all day Monday, and got called into voir dire in the early afternoon. Someone got sick during voir dire and an ambulance had to be called. Before it was finished, the defendant pleaded out. So they had to start all over again on Tuesday. She sits through voir dire all day Tuesday, and is selected as a juror at the end of the day. When she arrives for the trial Wednesday morning, this new defendant has also pleaded out, and the judge let the jurors go.
When I served on jury duty in the City of Philadelphia, you had to check electronic devices in. St. Louis doesn't have that requirement, though they are required to be turned off during proceedings.
can't find my passport
Dude, McCain is 7 points behind, chill.
Oh, did I mention that my car got booted while I was making a delivery to a fucking hospital?! Read my blog for today.
If you were still in Philly you might have been on Parking Wars. Surprisingly funny show...
I've watched some of the episodes...funny indeed. I'm not sure who's worse sometimes: the PPA folks or the violators.
What happened to me today was on the hospital property, so it was their security that booted my car...the fuckers. At least my boss gave me $20 of the $25 back.
Oh, did I mention that my car got booted while I was making a delivery to a fucking hospital?! Read my blog for today.
I would have added in your letter that you will be contacting all of the other delivery guys in your area and we will no longer leave our vehicles, all the patrons will have to meet you at the street where you park your car.
Maybe they can set up an official area for cars to park.
Forget what I said about studying for the OU.
I'm out of here in a month.
All my supposed security blown away by HM's pissy mood.
HM?
Fuck him.
He who must not be named.
He came home pissed off.
I was still up - well, it's Sunday Night Music Club - much as I hate it, it happens every week and I don't say a word because it's his house. So I stay awake as long as I can in the hope that the random people he brings home from the pub don't wake me up.
About 01.00 I hear a yell. I scream (I had my earplugs in, didn't know anyone was in)
Apparently Hely has broken his lamp.
Earplugs out, I can hear him cussing and huffing and puffing and he shouts out again because he has cut himself.
At this point I dress and go to say he doesn't have to do that (clear up) I will do it for him tomorrow.
He says he'll do it himself
I go to the toilet and realise he has brought home a scrappy end of toilet roll (I have bought the last 16 now) and mention it to him. He says yes he brought it back because he knew there wasn't any
He then asks when Hely is going to be let out
I say I had her innoculated yesterday (I did it on my own, despite the fact he said he would take us in his car) but I wasn't happy with her going out just yet
I say - I'll buy you a new lamp, you know I'll buy you a new lamp
admittedly I am angry at this point
Angry re the usual Sunday night no sleep
Angry re the usual Cherry clean up (the only room he has to do is the living room and that is a tip and has been for 6 weeks)
Angry re his so often repeated idea that Hely needs to be let out despite the risk of her bolting
Angry just anyway
He - DON'T YOU DARE GET ANNOYED AT ME!
Me - YES I AM ANNOYED BECAUSE.... (door slammed in face along with something muttered)
so I go into my room saying
Me - FINE! shut door
(but I bet you.....)
Him at door
I WANT YOU OUT IN A MONTH
So that's that babbas.
After all my swallowing my annoyance at Sunday night disturbances, at cleaning up after him in the kitchen daily, at my 3 room clean every week and him doing nothing. It all comes down to this. Barely nothing, and I'm out.
Of coure he probably doesn't mean it.
But after what wasn't even a disagreement - I mean I raised my voice for half a sentence, and that after he had raised his - how can I ever feel secure again?
Details given (and I hope you'll note they never were before) because this time I know I was annoyed but I did not lose my temper and was not in the wrong.
So much for being here for the next 6 years.
Looks like I'll have to move back to Mum & Dad's after all.
Very, very unhappy tonight.
Sorry to hear that SG but honestly not surprised, Ive seen too many friendships end when people who aren't fucking try to live together. I hope you can transition smoothly.... maybe he'll feel like enough of ass to be helpful with your move at least.
Oh Sundae, I'm so sorry. I really hope he realizes he was being an idiot and apologizes and it all blows over. Will you be able to keep your jobs if you're living with your parents?
Nope. They live 40+ miles away on the wrong side of London (= car or expensive commute)
Have had another thought since the doom & gloom posting. I might be able to bunk at the pub for a while. Still heartbreaking (I'd have to lose Diz and that makes me cry immediately) but I could keep my jobs.
Dunno.
I know I can't stay here now.
This is the first time he's told me to leave.
And our rows have been worse.
But we haven't had one in MONTHS.
So this is a new development, and I can't live like that.
To think I was planning six years ahead!
I feel so naive.
Hey SG, if you haven't had a fight in months...maybe this one will just blow over, and you won't have one for another year. :)
I have 4 days left to vacation and I am whinning about one day! ( I want to sleep )
pffft! @ me
SG, are there no rentals nearby that you can look at?
This is horrible. I know you must be feeling really shit at the moment. I so hope you find a solution that allows you to keep Diz.
I am so sorry, Sundae. What a crappy situation. Do you think he will calm down enough to listen to your side of things anytime soon?
I've pretty much decided I have to go.
I can't live with the threat hanging over me.
But hey, it's an adventure!
As long as I can take the Diz-cat with me I'll be okay.
It sounds like you're ready to do your own thing. All you needed was a blow-up to realize it. I hope you guys can patch things up after you get your own place.
I once had a friend living in my house that I finally had to ask to leave. We still get along fine.
Sounds like a crappy situation. I'd like to hear his side of things - I wonder what his perspective on it all is.
Fucked up my knee AGAIN! Arrggh! hurts.
Potential TMI. Lil' Pete is new to this menstration stuff and she's dealing with it at fencing camp... intense physical activity, white clothing, you get the picture. She managed to win all her bouts yesterday despite the issue.
edit: Just got a very happy phone call. All is well.
awww @ "new to this menstruation stuff"
if she uses tampax she can ride a horse in a white pantsuit. i know because i saw the commercials
that's not funny dude. my sister was riding a horse in a white pant suit under the wtc on 9-11.
White horse too. Damn fine product.
I always wanted a white horse. Who knew all I had to do was buy tampax to get it? I wonder if they would have given me Tonto, to?
If a woman had been responsible for those ads, it would have been a pastel pantsuit. White is easy to bleach. Baby blue, not so much.
if she uses tampax she can ride a horse in a white pantsuit. i know because i saw the commercials
Don't forget swimming... I understand they're good for swimming too.
My neighbors lost all but one of their chickens to dog(s).:sniff: They spotted one leaving the scene of the crime bird in mouth. I'm giving them some of my extra birds to rebuild the flock but now they're afraid to let them roam so the birds will be confined to a small hopefully dog proof area. Remember that your sweet pets are perfectly capable of untold destruction.
The biggest cause of friction between various neighbors on my street is dogs. (Unless you count Jersey Guy, who claims to have a permit to shoot elk from his front porch - with a high-powered rifle.) Common complaints include dogs barking, dogs whining, aggressive dogs harassing walkers and bikers, dogs killing other dogs, dogs tearing up the trash, dogs lying in the middle of the road, dogs chasing the wild-life, etc.
Was it a pet dog or a stray?
and people shouldn't let their pets (including cats imo) roam around at will. And FIX them!
I think he's a pet. He had a collar on. He looks like one who was sneaking around my place last summer, earning the warning shot from me. He probably has a home near a local lake (could be a summer visitor) but wanders when he gets off the cable. My Dad's garbage can in his then open basement got torn up a couple nights ago as well. My neighbors are pissed enough to shoot next time. :yeldead:
The only way to keep our black lab from roaming is to hobble him. If we had raised him from a puppy I assure you he would know the fence is his boundary. But he is fixed, and the neighbors know him for the sweet thing he is, so far we haven't had any complaints since we did get him fixed. When we first adopted him we didn't realize his lack of respect for fences, chain link and the 7ft wooden portion. If he couldn't safely roam we would've looked for a farm to put him on, even still we try and chastise him when we catch him out. One of our last dogs was constantly accused of eating our neighbor's chickens (which if she did good, better end for them than dying in the cock fights or constantly being tied up like they were), but there was no evidence supporting their claim. It was most likely the coyote/stray dog pack in the area, which they killed off, :( :( :(. Buddy (the black lab) has also ended the lives of several stray cats that get dumped in the area. I'm not particularly sad about that, they probably would've starved to death, and were only catchable because of they're weakened state. When the fields in the area become developed housing (ew!) my parents are planning on moving to the area my brother currently lives, that is very dog roaming friendly. Part of directions out to the place include "when you're chased by the three white sheep dogs..."
Today I'm upset because I'm on my way to destitution and having to be supported by my parents. More so than I've had to depend on them since high school. On top of that I can't even afford to play World of Warcraft (mainly I miss it b/c of all my friends on it) and it would be a very irresponsible expense. I haven't been that worried about it, except today an especially close friend asked me about it. Lastly, I took my first Hist exam, I think I did well, but I didn't have time to finish the essay question, I still had a good paragraph or two to write on the subject. Hopefully the professor understands my direction and sees enough detail in the beginning to give me full credit, knowing that I obviously fully understand the subject. I'm just a perfectionist and don't want any less than an "A" I need to raise my GPA.
If you wanna ride, don't ride the white horse.
can't bleach a gray horse white.
Yeah, but you can paint it...
You can lead a horse to paint, but you can't make it pink.
Change "paint" to "watercolor" and that's a keeper!
Hah! Nicely done. I was thinking 'colour' but that didn't make sense.
Was it a pet dog or a stray?
and people shouldn't let their pets (including cats imo) roam around at will. And FIX them!
Disagree about the cats - I think a life indoors is an unnatural one for cats. And they are far less dangerous than dogs. But as a cat owner I am biased and I freely admit it.
Dogs? Definitely not. No dog should be allowed to roam outside - fenced yards and private property only. And ideally on a lead when walking unless on open ground.
And all pets should be neutered unless the owner specifically buys the animal for breeding purposes.
The problem with cats outside is that they like to kill small animals, like birds and squirrels.
I have no problem with that. It's nature.
BTW I'd hate to see my cat go up against a squirrel. Expensive visit to the vet methinks.
My childhood cat went up against a raccoon and was fatally injured. He was a tough old guy though - kicked the crap outta many other "wild" animals, squirrels included.
I live next to a busy highway. I can't see a splat cat, I couldn't deal with that. I rode in the back of the station wagon with a kitty when I was a kid because I had climbed up the old Chinese Elm to see Cinders and he jumped down and ran in front of a car...it was one of the most horrible things I've ever seen. I still have the picture in my head. He was of course put to sleep and I was traumatized for days. (When I went back to school Sister Frances yelled at me that animals don't have souls and I would NOT be seeing my cat again. THis was the only time I remember my mom fighting my battles, but I was in second grade and my mom recalls she ripped Sister French Fry a new one.)
My cats don't go outside, but they have the run of the screened in front porch. I never thought of it as cruel to keep them in...they run and play and seem happy. Now I feel kind of bad. :sniff:
I have no problem with that. It's nature.
BTW I'd hate to see my cat go up against a squirrel. Expensive visit to the vet methinks.
I've seen dogs chase and injure a baby deer. I guess you'd say that's nature, also, but that doesn't make it right.
I don't think dogs should be allowed to roam because they are dangerous to people and vehicles. Yes, if I agreed with them being free to roam then I would agree with them killing large wildlife. Maybe not - there are less of them available to kill (here at least) so it makes more impact.
I take back what I said. Situations are different for different people, different locations. My cats have a great life, and I don't think I've ruined their lives by keeping them healthy and happy.
Dogs CAN be trained to not leave the yard. Zeke, may he rest in peace, knew exactly what his boundaries were and never got near leaving those boundaries...even to chase things.
Try training a cat to not wander in front of a semi.
The problem with cats outside is that they like to kill small animals, like birds and squirrels.
I don't recall where I saw the numbers or if they're even verifiable but if you think about how easy it is for a cat to grab birds at the feeder it gives you pause. [COLOR="White"]Wanted to type paws so badly but will hide pun here.[/COLOR]
The guilty animal was found. He is a permanent resident near the lake who started to wander a couple years ago during a divorce deal, apparently neither owner wanted responsibility for him. We know both parties to the divorce, but don't know why the dog is back on the street after settling down for so long.
We forget the real victims of divorce: the pets. Oh, yeah, and the children.
Poor thing is probably hungry if they've abandoned him.
I'm trying not to think about the consequences for the kids... they're in the same custody as the dog.
Oh lord...are you sure the kids didn't kill some of the chickens?
Feral children do have a certain independent streak I admire.
There was my laugh out loud for the day.
I'm sad because our Grand Pier has burned down. Monday the townn awoke to the smell of burning and noise of sirens and all we could do was watch while it took two hours for the entire pavilion to be ungulfed and entirely destroyed. I hope the picutres will upload.
Sadly, the rain came too late to help and all of the pavilion is lost. The underlying metal structure though is apparantly ok, and hopefully in good enough shape to be built on. What didn't help was the tide being out and the firefighters having virtually no water, they couldn't drive their tanker up the pier. I was carried up the pier as a babe in arms and was only there the day before this happened. It's what we do here, walk up the pier in the evening.
Lots of sad looking people around town at present.:(
What about the small dogs? Are they a "danger to humans?" I think no moreso than a cat.
A well trained pet, be it a cat, a dog or whatever is no danger to anyone. Its the people[COLOR="Silver"]idiots [/COLOR]who buy animals and don't train them that are the problem.
Thanks C, and I meant 'engulfed' of course!
This is a bad hit on a small traditonal English seaside town whose annual influx of summer visitors funds very many small businesses. Hotels, caravan parks, bars, restaraunts etc.
Monday was day one of the summer holiday season and coachloads of people arrived to find the central attraction ablaze. Ironically they stayed and ate ice cream and Fish n' Chips but once the novelty has worn off and the pier has stopped smoking, we face a grim summer, cancellations have already started.
And of course - it's raining!
I was carried up the pier as a babe in arms and was only there the day before this happened. It's what we do here, walk up the pier in the evening.
Lots of sad looking people around town at present.:(
Wow. That sucks. I'm sorry.
What about the small dogs? Are they a "danger to humans?" I think no moreso than a cat.
A well trained pet, be it a cat, a dog or whatever is no danger to anyone. Its the people[COLOR="Silver"]idiots [/COLOR]who buy animals and don't train them that are the problem.
lol...come on over and train my cats, will you? Yes, I know it can be done...but it's ten times harder than training a dog.
Oh, as to small dogs, the ones I know tend to be more snappy and bitey and barky than big dogs I know. I call it Short Dog Syndrome. My friend's little chihuahua can bite my ass...literally.
yeh, but a human can stomp or punt the little bastards, unlike the larger variety.
Major suckage, CZ. How old was the structure?
:( CZ. seems one by one the piers are going. let's hope they are able to raise enough to rebuild and recover.
I burnt my breakfast porridge. It was ok after I added some honey and nutmeg though. Just not as good as it could have been. :(
stressy/crappy/sicky week.
I saw the news about the pier and was very sad. It was only just being renovated and put back on a profitable footing by a millionaire investor. I walked on that pier with the first man I really loved, on a rainy, squally, grey day. I thought it was just perfect of course.
Such a blow for the town.
Terrible loss. Things like that really are integral to a town's self-identity. I know I'd be devastated if anything happened to our historic Piece Hall.
Diz stayed out last night.
He's not home yet.
I am now terrified I've lost another cat.
Sad about that pier. I hate to see such devastation, and I"m sure it was a place that brought joy to a lot of people.
Keeping things crossed for you, SG.
Found Diz - posting in the Happy thread
[Phone rings.]
Mr. Clod: Hello?
His mother: Hello sweetie. We're just cleaning out the garage up here. Is this your ten-speed bike?
MC: No.
MIL: I'm pretty sure you had one.
MC: I didn't.
MIL: I'm pretty sure it's yours.
MC: No, it's not. Maybe it's [my brother's].
MIL: No, he never had one.
MC: Neither did I.
MIL: Well, I'll call you and ask about it when you're more awake.
OH, DID I MENTION this conversation took place at 7:00 AM?!
The Pier was opened in 1904 and was a Victorian/Edwardian Music/Concert Hall which also hosted boxing and wrestling matches etc, and the pavilion part was only a section of the mile long boardwalk which allowed some boats to dock at the end, permitting visitors from Wales (across the water from here about 60 miles) to visit Weston the easy way.
Then two things happened. In 1930 the Pavilion burned down and later in the thirties we had WW11, and the longest stretch of the pier was dismanted as a means of discouraging invasion. The long arm of the pier was anyway a problem because we have the 2nd highest tidal rise and fall in the world, and when the tide goes out it's gone for miles and miles, so the pier was pretty useless to ships getting caught as the tide left them on the mudflats.
The destroyed pavilion re-opened as an amusement arcade, or covered fairground which has remained pretty much unchanged in some respects, although modernisation has permitted its owners to upgrade some of the games and attractions, but they were always confined to the space available. It was owned by several generations of one local family until in the Spring of this year they sold it to two young entrepeneurs, also a local family, Kerry and Michelle Michael
who since April this year have already spent about a million pounds on renovations including indoor go-carts on a new floor built into the existing roof. To put the finances in perspective, the owner has suggested that a rough estimate of cash lost in the fire included 'probably' half a millilon pounds, most of that in pound coins. I would say he isn't exagerating, its a money pit.
Then came the fire on Monday which destroyed completely the very beautiful pavilion.
The Michaels will re-build and it will be fantastic and loads of people are already saying that the fire might be a blessing in disguise, but the pier held wonderful and special memories for so many people that lots of us feel quite bereaved, and it will take time for the sense of loss to ease.
So there we go, and ever since Monday we have had prolonged squalls and thunderstorms, typical English summer.
I'll admit it, kids and people do get hurt by untrained/unsafe dogs allowed to wander, but I don't think a dog that would unprovoked attack a person should be allowed to live. Cats don't have anymore right to wander than dogs though I don't believe. Don't fool yourself into thinking a cat is less dangerous because of its size, the injuries I got from being attacked by a 10lb cat were a lot more extensive than when I got bit by an 80lb dog. The dog stopped when it was yelled at, hasn't done it again (he mistook me for danger because I was on a bike in his territory), the cat wouldn't quit and couldn't be caught. I say keep your cats inside if they seem happy with it. If you're comfortable with letting it wander around, do so, but don't get pissed at my dog if he catches it. I'm not trying to be a bitch, if I'm around I'll save your cat, but I'll assume its a stray to the pound it will go. If you do the same to my dog, well fair play I guess.
Cat, dog or kid, if it attacks me, one of us will be dead.:eyebrow:
Sorry about the wonderful looking building CZ, but the fire was pretty. Hopefully something better or equal will take its place and ya'll will pull through this year just fine. If it makes you feel better about your weather, its been 100+ and humid a few times these past few weeks here.
Glad you found your cat SG.
I'm upset just because my mind won't quit worrying. Of course it would stop if someone would just text me back....
Cat, dog or kid, if it attacks me, one of us will be dead.:eyebrow:
Well in this case the dog was doing its job.
...
I'm upset just because my mind won't quit worrying. Of course it would stop if someone would just text me back....
I'm sure if you post your number here, someone will text you.
The long arm of the pier was anyway a problem because we have the [COLOR="Red"]2nd highest tidal rise and fall in the world[/COLOR], and when the tide goes out it's gone for miles and miles, so the pier was pretty useless to ships getting caught as the tide left them on the mudflats.
I guess a new pier would be a lot more attractive than a tidal power plant...
I was bringing a basket of laundry into our bedroom.
Mrs. Dallas' nightstand is right next to the door. It has a jewelry box on top of it. Nothing fancy, but I gave it to her last Christmas so she'd have a place to stash earrings for her newly pierced ears.
I managed to knock the jewelry box off onto the floor. As if that weren't bad enough, I stumbled forward and regained my balance by planting my foot . . . . right into the jewelry box. :crunch:
Ow, you crushed the family jewels!
Right. Bedtime.
Have been up waiting to see if the burgalar alarm would go off again.
As it was doing from about 23.00 onwards.
After much distress and hair pulling I finally got an engineer on the phone who gave me some useful advice. Which was very good of him as it wasn't his alarm and he wouldn't have got a penny for the call. Previous calls to the police, the council, the electricity board and the alarm manufacturers were less fruitful. As were the calls to HM, away at a festival.
Not sure how he'll feel when he sees the mess I made of the alarm panel. But the outside alarm only stopped about 30 minutes ago, and given that our neighbours have a toddler and a child on the way (not to mention the rest of the street - oh, and me!) I figure he can deal with it when he gets back. Also, the reason he couldn't help is that he has forgotten the code - it's been so long since he used it. Which to me suggests he won't be too miffed.
Why Sunday? Why always Sunday?
I was so looking forward to a quiet night. For once since I started work.
No HM inviting people round to play guitar until gone 03.00.
No HM coming home pissed and deciding to climb through the skylight into my room rather than knock on the front door having forgotten his keys (last week).
Monday is my only 12 hour working day in the week. Why always Sunday?
Sleep. Sleep now. Night night.
:compute: Someone sending me a report that they didn't check. The spreadsheet had about 75% of the data doubled out. Faster for me to edit than send it back and wait for a response.
Monday I'm supposed to be picking classes at late registration, and I'm also supposed to pay for the semester. Silly me thinking that the "SUPER EASY ONLINE" application for student loans would be simple, and I'd have money for school. Silly me thinking that maybe when you call your bank they'd have someone available for you to talk to. Silly me thinking that when you called the number the bank gave you, someone would be there to tell you why you were denied. Silly me thinking that the next phone number wouldn't lead to a recording with no real people AT ALL for a free credit check. My letter will arrive in 7-10 days telling me why I can't get any aid. With a co-signer. For school.
Silly me.
Razz, are you looking at Stafford loans? You don't need a co-signer, there's no credit check, and the rate is fixed by the feds. Alternative, or private, loans are another animal altogether. Also, a student who gets no "free" grant money will have eligiblity for federal Stafford loans because eligibility is based on Cost of Attendance versus aid received. You should have no problem getting a stafford loan, and most schools have a listing of lenders who they have worked with in the past; many students don't use their local bank. Of course, you can use whatever lender you choose, you would just give the lender code to the FA department.
Since every school does things a little differently you should go online to your school or contact their FA department to see what their steps are. Stafford loans are based on the FAFSA, so you would have to complete that process, but it's a better deal and you should exhaust that possibilty first due to the many benefits of the program (one of them being the deferrment while you are attending school, and the 6 month grace period once you finish or cease attending.)
I should add that it can be a lengthy process, especially if you have not begun the FAFSA process; many schools offer a payment plan and if you are eligible you will basically be reimbursing yourself at a later date. This is high processing time, so it can take some time...but I believe it to be worth it.
PM me if I can help in any way.
There is expertise in the Cellar.
Go to the financial aid office and ask for help. I have found them to be extremely helpful making sure that all things are "checked off the list". If you haven't done the FAFSA, do it right away.
http://www.fafsa.ed.gov/
Also go to the school website for financial aid options. There should be a link to the Stafford Loan which is pretty easy to apply for. I've done this for both kids and it is pretty painless. They'll just ask you to sign a letter accepting the funds. Once this is done, you'll pretty much get it throughout your school terms.
Well, as I said, every school is different, but the FAFSA is an annual process. Also, not all schools pre-package. You may need to specifically request a loan throught a request form, rather than relying on saying "yes" to loans on the FAFSA, same for federal work-study. The reason for this is some schools, such as us, are firm believers in default management, and we have felt that the student needs to know what they are getting into (i.e. REAL debt) as opposed to them seeing a pretty number on a page and thinking "sweet! I'll take it!"
As Tink said, contact your FA office for specifics on their processes, and PM me if you have related questions.
I finished my fafsa last night, then I tried to apply for a private loan from the bank that I've had accounts with since I was 13 years old. The bank denied me even with my dad cosigning for alot of shit that doesn't make sense, and gave me an 800 number that doesn't go anywhere to "answer all of my questions". So now I'm trying a stafford loan (currently on hold going on 10 minutes now) to get info about that, because I went to the FA office this morning and they just said to "call the 800 number" or "try applying again" because the rejections were due to me not having a cosigner...even though I did.
It's all fucking nobody's fault, because "we don't handle that, xxxx dept handles that, here's their 800 number" and I keep getting 800 numbers until I hit one that has NO people available to talk to at all, and then the recording tells me to have a nice day.
Also I'm now late to work today, where I'm supposed to be covering a shift for another girl because I can't get through to anyone. Awesome.
(Don't mean to shit on your help guys, I really, REALLY appreciate you trying to help, but this is getting really ridiculous and frustrating.)
Razz, I'm really just trying to understand this, but why wouldn't your FA dept lead you to a Stafford loan (administered by the school) and tell you to forget about the private loan. Again...you need NO co-signer, NO credit check. I'm quite confused. Make sure you're asking the right questions, arm yourself with information. A great resource is
http://studentaid.ed.gov/PORTALSWebApp/students/english/index.jsp
The more you know, the easier it will be to navigate the process. Please let me know what happens, and why you are not applying for a stafford...
I'm fucking COLD! I ask for a heater, but NOOO, if I get one, then others will ask for one and let's not forget about the fucking safety issue of having a heater in my cubicle. Fuckers. I have problems with cold, it says so on the mayo clinic website!!
Luckily my boss is going to say it is because of health problems that I need it. If I still get denied, I am getting the ugliest brightest fucking blanket and MATCHING fucking sweater. We'll see what they do then when the precious visitors are being shown around and I am bundled up like a bag lady.
Oh and thanks for telling me that the temperature is good for Everyone. Apparently I don't FUCKING count.
fuck
Just get a big heat lamp. Tell them you have bad night vision.
Pearl the dog is in surgery tomorrow morning to remove the 1" steak bone she ate over the weekend.
Luckily she was in the x's watch, not mine, and so x has offered to pay 100% of the bill.
You don't feed dogs cooked bones, people. They can't digest them.
She is under really good vet care, and she's a strong girl, she will make it. They were very good at assuring me this one is not a problem. It's in her stomach and so it should be pretty simple. They had her under anesthesia before and she did very well. This is one of the best vets in the area.
And those are all the thoughts I keep repeating.
I'm sure your puppy will be fine UT. It's still frightening when your pet has to have an operation though. Keep your chin up. She'll be home before you know it.
Will definitely be thinking good thoughts for Pearl tomorrow.
My friggin lift kit broke. What the hell? :headshake
Get ready with the snuggles and hugs, UT. Pearl's gonna need extra love when she gets home.
U.T.Thinking good thoughts for Pearl.( a beautiful name btw)
Jinx-I don't know enough about cars to know what I am looking at except something that looks like a bandage :blush:
Hope everything goes smooth for Pearl, UT.
jinx - that looks like installation error, to me.
MY KIDS ARE DRIVING ME NUTS. All day long, bickering, competing over who gets what first, who sits in the front seat, who chooses the TV show, who gets the computer, who made the mess in the living room, who was the last one to scoop the litter box, GRRRR! And then my daughter gives me this doleful look and says "do you hate me?" Knowing damn well I could never in a million years hate her, it's just a way of pushing my buttons. If you ask me, summer vacation is at least 2 months too long!
bbro - without wantingto sound harsh, at least you have the option of putting more clothes on. I have been too hot in every job I've had in the last 6 years, and the longest of those had air-con! If you have a health condition I do commiserate - you should be provided with a personal heater, or at least allowed to provide your own.
But the coldest person in any working environment should never be allowed to raise the genberal temperatue to above recommended guidelines. And no amounts of fluffy jumpers and blankets should be allowed to sway that.
UT - very sorry to hear about Pearl. She's with the experts and I'm sure she will be good as new very soon. My cats have raw bones all the time, and HM gives them cooked ones - no problems yet, but I am wary. When we move, Diz won't be getting any more cooked bones. Especially not the spicy chicken ones, which he somehow didn't realise would result in cat sick all over my bed...?
Juniper - I thought you packed them all off to camp or summer school in the US? Not a parenting dig - we were shipped off to our Grandparents here :)
UT--thinking of Pearl, I'm sure everything will come out fine (pun intended.) Lots of lovies when she gets home!
juniper, I used to know a group of ladies who had a huge party every year when their kids went back to school.
bbro - without wantingto sound harsh, at least you have the option of putting more clothes on. I have been too hot in every job I've had in the last 6 years, and the longest of those had air-con! If you have a health condition I do commiserate - you should be provided with a personal heater, or at least allowed to provide your own.
But the coldest person in any working environment should never be allowed to raise the genberal temperatue to above recommended guidelines. And no amounts of fluffy jumpers and blankets should be allowed to sway that.
The only problem with putting more clothes on is the moment I step outside, I start to sweat. No, I don't think that they should raise the entire temperature just for me, that wouldn't be fair to anyone else. I just want them to realize that they can't say it is good for
everyone when I'm suffering over here. It'll be fine, I'll just wear my cute clothes outside and dress like a bag lady in the office. :D
jinx - that looks like installation error, to me.
Yep, she needs to fire her mechanic. ;)
UT- Good luck with Pearl today.
Juniper- Sorry. What ages are the kids? Maybe we can come up with a book series that will suck them in and shut them up! Remember that you are their model for behavior. Problem solve out loud... that sort of thing.
People in general.
I'll second that.
Was bounced around from the Financial Aid office to the Scholarship office several times today only to find out that -- surprise! One of my scholarships ran out last year! Thankfully, I have one other one that covers 75% of my tuition, so I'm not in too much of a scrap. I'm just upset because I spent the whole summer thinking I was good for school this year, only to find out -- three weeks before the semester starts -- that it's not the case. Stupid red tape.
(PS -- Razz, good luck with tuition crap.)
Sigh. You can bet the administrators love red tape as much as you do. Do you not check your own financial aid and keep track so you know when it's going to "run out"?
It turns out that Pearl has developed a heart murmur since her last treatment in November, so the vets are now opting not to operate, to just keep her fluids up and hope that her digestive system breaks down the bone. It is supposed to do that eventually but can lead to further complications. They are calling in a doggie pulmonary specialist to evaluate the murmur and see what caused it.
Very sorry to hear that UT. It must hurt like hell (for you I mean, I'm sure she's doing fine).
Do you not check your own financial aid and keep track so you know when it's going to "run out"?
I do, actually, and that's why I'm frustrated. I checked it several times last semester and over the summer to make sure I had what I thought I had, and the system told me that both of my scholarships had been awarded for 2008/2009 and were estimated at $x, the usual amount. It took three separate visits to the Scholarship office for them to tell me that my eligibility had expired for one of them, despite the fact that my online account still claims I will be receiving money from it this year.
@UT, sorry to hear about Pearl! Hopefully the specialists will be able to figure it all out. Best wishes for the pup.
Don't get me wrong, I adore my kids. They are 10 and 12, and I think it's just a developmental thing that makes them so annoying at the moment. Yeah, one of those "phases" that will last for the next 8 years or so. ;)
Thinking of you and Pearl, UT.
Sorry to hear about Pearl , UT. Hope all goes well and she's back on her paws soon.
I do, actually, and that's why I'm frustrated. I checked it several times last semester and over the summer to make sure I had what I thought I had, and the system told me that both of my scholarships had been awarded for 2008/2009 and were estimated at $x, the usual amount. It took three separate visits to the Scholarship office for them to tell me that my eligibility had expired for one of them, despite the fact that my online account still claims I will be receiving money from it this year.
@UT, sorry to hear about Pearl! Hopefully the specialists will be able to figure it all out. Best wishes for the pup.
Sorry Chocolatl...that does suck. I didn't mean to project my own personal work frustration on you! Please forgive? :blush:
Hang in there girl!
I'm sorry about the financial aid problems too, Chocolatl. Got to be incredibly frustrating. I've solved that problem by not qualifying for anything. ;) But then, I'm attending the cheapest university I could find, so I guess it works out.
Sending healthy get-well vibes for Pearl, too.
UT - it went in a bone, but it will come out a pearl.
Sorry UT. Prayin she pulls through just fine.
*sigh* school tells me to apply through chase, but they're having issues with their website, so my application dies every few minutes. I just got the technical support equivilant of "did you try turning it off and then back on again?" so now I've got to wait 20 minutes to see if the error "clears up" so I can continue my application
PS All the extra soothy and feel bettery vibes I can muster are being sent to Pearl.
That sucks. Keep plugging away. Chase is good. We have one loan through them.
Me.....friend of my son's house burned completely to the ground the other day. Friend (20 and deaf) taking care of two younger siblings (also deaf) while parents were at work. Evidently something having to do with a fan.
My mom's best friend's house burnt down a few years ago...
Source of the fire?
She'd taken her laundry out of the dryer but they were running late for dinner plans so she didn't take the time to fold and put away like she usually does. One of her underwire bras got ridiculously hot. Crazy eh?
More soothy vibes to tink's son's friend and siblings.
Some friends of ours house burnt down recently because:
their step-son, who had recently come to stay with them, set the house on fire and was watching it burn, with them inside, while he was waiting for the school bus.
Sorry Chocolatl...that does suck. I didn't mean to project my own personal work frustration on you! Please forgive? :blush:
Hang in there girl!
No harm done. :) I didn't fully explain the situation the first time around, so you didn't have all the details. I'm not complaining too much, though -- I know other people end up having to pay a lot more out of pocket, so I'm grateful for what I've had!
I'm going to work on filling out a late FAFSA over the next few days to see if I qualify for anything (doubt it) and if all else fails, fewer impulse buys and maybe a tiny loan will hopefully solve the problem.
That sucks. Keep plugging away. Chase is good. We have one loan through them.
Me.....friend of my son's house burned completely to the ground the other day. Friend (20 and deaf) taking care of two younger siblings (also deaf) while parents were at work. Evidently something having to do with a fan.
Was everyone okay?
Was everyone okay?
Yep. Thank goodness. Large acreage and Grandma lives just through the woods so the kids ran there. Sad. Loss estimated at $860,000! Everything gone.
What's sad about those kinds of catastrophes is losing all your pictures, mementos, etc. My heart goes out to your friends.
UT, hope Pearl's feeling better soon. Pilau has his paws crossed for her.
It just never ends. I have these friends, a married couple, who have split up and gotten back together I don't know how many times. They are both heavy drinkers, and they are fun until they get to a certain point and then it's either they are fighting or they are talking at the same time and getting louder and louder. After they reach a point, it's time for me to go.
Last night I stopped at the club for some beers and conversation, and they came in. We were sitting on the patio having a nice time when all of a sudden they were fighting again. I have told them I can't deal with their conflict, and can't be around it (watching this kind of thing brings back bad memories and makes me sick to my stomach and I just can't stand it.) I told them to stop hurting each other, and I went home. It didn't help that Homeless Guy then came home from the bar with his sister and was bitching about her saying he could have done this or that in his life. I get crap all day at work. J & R had my stomach in knots, then HG starts in with his WAaaa-waaa crap. Mad because he doesn't like what his sister says about his DJ'ing when he hasn't had a job in I don't know how long? How much can he keep taking, and why can't I be mean and stop giving and kick him out on his ass.
J calls today here at work and was telling me that R is saying he wants a divorce. I can talk to her, and listen, but she wanted to know if I wanted to go out later. I don't get off work until at least 6:30 tonight, probably later to finish something I am working on. I am not a good friend I guess, but I don't know how to help them, or her. I see them both at fault. LIke I said, because of some things I have been through I get physically ill watching people hurt each other like that.
I don't know...I try to keep my spirits up but why does the world seem hell-bent on making sure all I see are rainclouds?
Sorry...
tell them to save some time and trouble. they should both go completely dry for 30 days. at the end of those 30 days if they still want a divorce just file for it immediately.
there are any number of likely scenarios in those 30 days to give you fodder for the what's making you happy thread.
sorry, i make inappropriate jokes sometimes.
my fodder was killed in the 9/11 you bastard
I know but how insensitive can you be? Your 9/11 fodder fell on my sister killing her immediately. bastardo!
you ees bastardicante maximucho
You keel my fahther, prepare to DIE!
An enormous prostitution ring was taken down over the last couple days. It annoys me to think of all the resources used to go after that, but that's another story. I've got some clients who have some skin in this game and I'm not looking forward to any questions that may come down the road. I've done nothing wrong, but with the wonderful anti money laundering laws i will have to jump through a lot of hoops to prove i didn't do anything wrong... possibly.
And to think you could have bartered some of your services.
[color=white]I'm kidding, officer![/color]
[color=white]Sugar tits.[/color]
They called and told me to take Pearl home and just watch over her and hope the bone breaks down in the stomach. They will schedule the cardiologist for next week.
Well, you guys made me laugh. :)
There is no way either one will stop drinking, though he would be more likely than her. I like to party, sure, but I don't hang out with them all that much because I don't like drinking alll the freaking time. MAYBE once a week, if that.
I need to surround myself with positive people. So, here's my plan: all dwellars must immediately pack up and move within a 10 mile radius of me. Thanks!
if you lived in mexico, I'd think about that.
if you lived in mexico, I'd think about that.
Ohio is the new Mexico.
If you pay for all my schooling, I'm so there.
If I adopt you I can get your tuition waived.
Diz and I are packing right now
(you do know we'll both be dead within a year though, right?)
But we'll have fun getting there! Do you want to be Thelma, or Louise?
I want you to be J.D. too. ;)
People who do not pay their bills. I'm getting really REALLY tired of it. I record everything and some of the excuses I hear are getting really old.
I worry about Bullitt whenever the wildland fire fighters suffer another
loss.
I worry about Bullitt whenever the wildland fire fighters suffer another loss.
Happens too often.
I'm not upset today, exactly, but I could be...happier?
The new couple (see "What's Making You Happy Today" thread) asked for Friday and Saturday alone after their handfasting, and so I am at Tree Fae's house...without TF. She is continuing to see to her suicidal ex husband as I write this, and so I will be here...comfy, but alone through tomorrow afternoon, when I go home.
TF is about three days from having discharged her sense of responsibility to her ex, and she and I will be able to spend time together once again. I've seen her for all of about eight hours in the last month, and I'm ready to be able to get back to being us.
Wish I could help you out, Els. You are a gem of a guy!
My stomach is upset today, I think I know why but its really overreacting.
Wish I could help you out, Els. You are a gem of a guy!
I don't know about a gem of a guy. Maybe a cubic zirconia of a guy...
I don't know about a gem of a guy. Maybe a cubic zirconia of a guy...
No. You're a ruby, UT's an emerald, xobruce is a topaz and Flint is a simulated sapphire. :)
Flint is a simulated sapphire
Don't be getting racist, now. ;)
What does that even mean? Besides, Flint is a flint.
What does that even mean?
It means I can see the maniacal glitter in your eyes you anti-anthropomorphic flinty Flint! ;)
:eyeball: :eyeball:
67.4 degrees.
What the hell is the point of all this global warming we're doing if it's too chilly to go to the pool in August ffs???
People who can't "take a hint" or even a blatant remark that you don't want a visit from them.
IF I wanted a house guest, a visitor or an outing to cart someone else all over the place, feed them and do the leg work for them... I wouldn't have said "There is a Motel 3 miles away... we are going to be too busy those days". They are in town from out of state to look for a house... why do they need my involvement again? Oh yeah... because they are lonely, lazy, manipulative, and cheep. Which brings me to the next thing that is pissing me off today...
People who live a life of privilege and think others need to take care of them... grow up, get a fucking job whether you need one or not, spend your own money to support yourself (you have it after all), be generous at least every once in a while (even the poor know it is polite to bring gifts or take a host to dinner however small and inexpensive it may be), Learn to be considerate of others (you are not the center of MY universe), Don't offer your opinion/advice constantly... you do nothing for a living or for a hobby... what could you possibly have to off in REAL life experience that we could learn from... so shut up, be responsible for your own self... if you need help find the professional that can supply you with it.. and make an appointment just like the rest of us, and realize that the rest of us HAVE to work to feed ourselves and HAVE to figure out our OWN way... you can too.
67.4 degrees.
What the hell is the point of all this global warming we're doing if it's too chilly to go to the pool in August ffs???
NB: At 67.4 deg, the pool feels *warm* (and not just in the yellow spots).
Anybody notice that the left lane on the highway has become the new right lane?
Just come through approx 2 hours of the worst acid reflux I have had in my life. I mean, holding onto the table and wondering if I should be going to A&E type pain.
I knew I would get through it, I was 95% sure it was just heartburn/ reflux whatever. But although it's been a problem for me in the past, I've never had anything like this.
I'll get a doctors appointment tomorrow. After doing some research, the cut off point for discussing it with a GP is two weeks, or if you get it more than twice a week. Both of which apply to me. I haven't detailed it here because heartburn sounds like such a wimpy complaint. It's been making me miserable for a while now though. It's almost definitely aggravated by my weight, not helped by the broken futon I sleep on that tilts my body doownwards and quite possibly affected by being stressed at present.
The doc might just send me away and tell me to buy some Gaviscon (something I intend to do tomorrow anyway) but I want to push him about whether I should be on PPIs for a while. My Uncle has Barrett's Oesophagus which potentially runs in families. I'm not saying I have it, just that if it is something my family are prone to, I want my GP to know so he can help me come to the right decision.
For those who haven't heard of it, it's a condition where the lining of the oesophagus is damaged by the acid leaking from the stomach. The damaged cells become pre-cancerous, and although the additional risk is only 0.5-1.5% the cancer is very hard to treat (25% cure rate IF caught early and WITH pretty drastic surgery). Uncle Jim will have to have regular endoscopies from now on. It is more prevalent in males however and more common in the over 40s. It's advice I'll be asking for mostly.
4 years worth of sales data and electronic material lost.
4 years worth of sales data and electronic material lost.
Dude.
Never say die.
What happened?
SG and Classicman - my sympathies to both of you. Big time.
As for what's upsetting me today, it's the day after Patch Tuesday.
Yay.
*plus*
As an unexpected bonus, it is really finally time to do XPSP3. What a monster.
People that don't format their own documents before sending them out. It's a waste of my time to have to do it for them. Sending back....:mad2: Again!
People who don't take their commitments seriously. Yes, it is just rec league soccer, but when you say you will be somewhere, be there. I put my name back on the roster for tonight's game with the understanding that I would be a third substitute and would only play a few minutes to give the knee a first runout. Two of my players just called to say they are going to a party instead of the game, since I'll be there.:mad2:
Lookout - at least they called you this time. Better than WE managed to do. ;) I notice they still didn't invite you though. :P
Just gone home to leave a note. I knocked on the door before entering - I do not count myself as living there any more.
As soon as I entered I noticed the smell. Really rancid. Hely came in with me - she spent Monday & Tuesday with me at work, but I hadn't seen her today.
Her water bowl had been used as a food bowl at Diz's end of the counter. As had two other bowls. I always kept them separate because the two cats didn't get on - so they had specific areas and specific bowls. I couldn't see any fresh water. The pint glass Diz always used in my bedroom was down to half a pint and the water was obviously old and slighty furred.
The litter tray hasn't been emptied or topped up since Monday week when HM asked me how quickly I could move out and I didn't sleep a night there after that. In fact it was only half a tray of litter - I hadn't realised it had got so low and before the row I made a mental note to get some before work Tuesday morning. We're talking 9 days now.
My bedroom has apparently been used. There is an empty bottle of Guinness beside the bed and the skylight is open. However my night shirt is still half under the pillow where I left it and the fitted sheet is still untucked (I had a restless last night). A plant had been knocked off the wardrobe (I noticed when I came to collect Diz on Monday) and it was still spilled on the floor.
I have taken all the plants with me. My regret is that I cannot take Hely. I left the following note.
I’ve technically moved out.
I will come back over the weekend, when I hope to remove most, if not all, of my possessions. If I can’t take them all at this time I will advise you when I expect to have the remainder removed. I’m not intentionally dragging it out – I just don’t have the means to move large volumes of stuff.
I have kept my key for the time being, however if you would prefer to have it please collect it from EEA during my working hours. We will then need to agree times/ dates for me to access the house. I can assure you that I will only come back into the house to take things which belong to me, and have absolutely no intention of causing any damage or taking anything that does not belong to me. Unless I hear from you otherwise regarding this, I will double lock the front door and post the key through the letterbox as soon as I am done.
As I do not have a fixed address I cannot ask the Post Office to redirect my post. As I see it, you have three options
- drop it off at EEA or the pub periodically
- mark it return to sender
- throw it in the bin
Obviously I’d prefer the first option.
As a gesture of goodwill and I hope friendship, I am leaving the laptop for the time being. I don’t have wi-fi access so it seems a shame to remove something that currently means more to you than me. I will not take it without notifying you even if I still have a key.
SG,
Eek. Doesn't sound like a very good time you're having. Hope it all works out.
I remember *backstory time!* when my now ex-wife, kicked me out of the house this past January, how utterly ridiculous it was arranging and actually getting stuff out of the house. Not to mention the sheer uncomfortable silence that hung in the air. Things like that are definitely something that you never had expected or planned on doing. Now I don't really know who you're talking about, or the circumstances under which you're leaving, none of my business, but I most certainly know how you're feeling. It's definitely nothing that anybody wants to feel or be in for any amount of time.
You'll be alright. I thought I wouldn't make it, but I somehow did. And you will too. If it's one thing that I learned after moving out, it's that you can never bring enough boxes and packing tape.
Just keep your chin up and remember to breathe every now and then. :comfort:
Well put FStop - I concur completely.
I'm going to have to side with Roseanne. I absolutely loved Brad Pitt in the "Fight Club" era, and Angelina was wonderful in "Mr. & Mrs. Smith". It very much, almost mirrored my marriage, but Jesus Lord, enough is enough. Quit adopting and fucking head to a no-name town and get the hell off of my TV.
Both of them have done a 360 in recent years, and it's quite, quite apparent that they're only doing cinematics to keep bread on the table.
One of my cats has decided to use one of my large potted palms as a toilet. If I find out which one, I'm going to wring its neck. Until then, I hope the next time it tries it, the little rat really enjoys the cayenne pepper I've sprinkled all over the soil for it.
SG, why don't you come and stay at my place? It's nice here, and we have plenty of room. You can even bring both the cats (as long as they don't mess up my plants lol).
Sundae, I've missed whats going on in your life at the moment, but it sounds like you have a handle on things...and I am sending good wishes your way.
Whats going on with Hely? why cant she go with you and Diz?
I'd invite you to live with me, but I think my two little boys would drive you nuts, but you and the cats are more than welcome.
I fucked up pretty good yesterday...read my blog entry.
I'd love to pack my bags & come to Aus. But I doubt I could ever leave my beloved England. Unless you throw in some hot sex - then I'd be tempted.
I couldn't move with Hely because she still fights with Diz. HM offered to take her - when we had our sensible, structured conversation about me moving out . Back when we agreed it would be December so I could save depsoit & rent for my new place.
I can get away with taking one cat (I have found, judging by responses on websites) but two cats that yowl at eachother and can't be in the same room? Nope.
It breaks my heart because I don't see pets as disposable, I took Hely on for life. But the alternative is not finding somewhere reasonably permanent for me, let alone Diz. So with HM agreeing to take Hely, at least she stays in a familiar place with a familiar person and isn't back in a cage in the beauty contest world of rescue cats. And HM owned a cat for y-e-a-r-s even though he has rather a Victorian Father approach to cat rearing (which his brother and I know was successful because he had a docile and quite lazy moggie, but he thinks was down to strict moral control).
The sad thing is she really bonded with me. So she is currently in and out of the office. She waits on the doorstep to follow me home at 18.00. So far I have avoided this by slippiing out the back door, getting a lift and simply picking her up and taking her to HM's. I feel rotten about the whole thing. In fact I wonder if I might just talk to John about her being a pub cat - she has the perfect temperament for it. She could live downstairs and Diz could live upstairs.
It's a bit much to ask to bring my whole menagerie though. And if she settled, could i leave her there?
I dunno. I would never have got her if I had known how precarious my situation was. And although it was my idea initially, HM was all for it, saying he was only holding off suggesting it because he didn't want to upset me (implying Dylan was never coming back).
And here she is, on my desk, making herself at home.
I really do sympathize with your situation SG. I have no words that'll make you feel any better, though.
Not to make light of your difficulties, but can I ask what kind of wild ass cool technology you have in England? You use your telephone as an Emergency Exit? That would be cool, kind of like The Matrix. Or is it that in case of emergency you have to call someone to find out where the exit is? Cuz that would suck. Hullo? Operator, my building is on fire. Oh, I can use the door on the left, you say? Thank you.
It's possible that this lack of sleep is causing my brain to misfire.
:D
We are
Emergency Exit Arts.
We have a fireworks division called Emergency Exit Fireworks.
The phone was labelled before my time - I assume to stop the person picking it up giving the wrong company name.
How cool is it that you can have a cat at work, though? I love orange tabbies, they're so sweet and affectionate.
I have days when having one of my kitties here would really help the stress level.
I'm not sure it's entirely approved of. But as I do countless things for them outside work (for example opening up and closing the hall when the artists need to work weekends) I am given a bit of leeway. It helps that Hely isn't as much of a fusspot as Diz. She's curled up in a carrier bag with a fleece in it under my desk right now.
Anyway, I'm in the wrong thread. Right here and now I am perfectly happy. Nothing that about £10k couldn't improve, but very good all the same.
very very cool SG. I'm sure you've shared that before, but that is the first I've seen of what you actually do.
and about the phone, I was sure there was a perfectly logical explanation. My scenario just struck my funny bone.
Argh.
Found out at the weekend that the pub sale is imminent.
I thought they were still in early negotiations, but John says it's with the solicitors.
So I asked (trying to act as if I know that already), "So when do you think it will actually go through then?"
"Dunno," says John, "could be a week, could be a month."
So I sat there nodding wisely and trying not to scream.
It wouldn't have made a difference to me moving in - I need to live somewhere however temporary. But it does frighten me.
After a sleepless night (see RFN - I'm having an allergic reaction to something) I have decided worrying will not help anything. What will be will be.
If it's a week (which I accept is highly unlikely!) then I'll just have to throw myself on EEA's mercy. Get a loan from them, take a week off and borrow the minibus to move (I did it in a shopping trolley this time - took me three trips back & forth!)
If I get a little more grace I'll accept it gratefully. I'm still going to ask for help moving this time round though! But I'll be better prepared. Going to have a clothes and book cull this week for starters. All I have at HM's is two empty suitcases and the laptop, which I will collect today. I'm going to get them packed and ready so I can move with the minimum of fuss.
I'm trying to sound brave but as I typed those last words my stomach just rolled over. Deep breaths. Calm.
Sorry to hear that. Focus forward.
Sundae, you are a brilliant, resilient woman. However, I can only imagine the stress and pain you are currently in. You could move in here with me, I've tons of extra room, but, if Oz can't tempt you, I highly doubt the humid, blistering summers and the horrid, suicide-color of the Ohio winter skies would interest you AT ALL. On the other hand, we Yanks have a love affair with English accents and I can see you landing a nice job as a DJ over here! You should do voice-overs, etc.
So sorry about Hely. Sometimes life just sucks but chin up, woman. You've got all the right stuff to come through like the champ you are!
Thanks everyone.
Watch out Bri, you never know...!
I can't do much about my circumstances right now (except be sensible) so I am working on my attitude instead. And coming here really helps.
I highly doubt the humid, blistering summers and the horrid, suicide-color of the Ohio winter skies would interest you AT ALL. On the other hand, we Yanks have a love affair with English accents and I can see you landing a nice job as a DJ over here! You should do voice-overs, etc.
Bri definitely speaks the truth. Ohio does, as well as Southwestern PA right next door, have gloomier-than-hell winters. I would rather play guitar for pocket change in Leicester Square than spend another winter here.
However, the accented-DJ's do quite well here, yes. And there's a furniture company in the Pittsburgh metro area that insists on using an Englishwoman for voiceovers. And they're the biggest around here.
Nevertheless, I believe you'll be fine. I know you will. Just remember, it can always be worse. You
could be in Ohio. ;)
Truer words have never been spoken.
Still though, some of the coolest women live in Ohio!
I'm sorry to hear about the troubles you're having SG. On the bright side, I'm a sucker for believing in the averages, so I can't help but think about the awesome amounts of good luck that is obviously coming your way to average all this out. You'll be filling whole pages of What's making you happy today? at a single sitting.
So true. Hang in there, SG!
Sundae, do you know anything about the people who are buying the pub? Is the main concern not being able to live there, or are you worried about job security too? Just need to know exactly what I need to be crossing my fingers for over here. :) I know everything will work out, one way or another.
Minifob (aka Kudzu Head) was due for yet another haircut. He has caught on to my trick of cutting it all ninja-style while he stands in the bathtub playing with the running water, and fought me on it more than usual. Dodging his head away from me, swinging his arm up to block me at the last second... as a result, I made a couple of really bad cuts, and the final product was, well, unpresentable to say the least. It looked terrible. So I had to just bite the bullet and hold him down while I buzzed his whole head with the clippers. He was really, really upset. At least I know he can go a good 6-8 weeks without needing another haircut now.
If you stab him in the head with those pointy scissors once or twice when he's windmilling his arms, he will probably learn that it's less painful for him to get his hair cut instead of his head. Either that or he'll get some interesting scars.
lmao @ Kudzu Head!
Poor fella! :)
Thanks everyone.
Watch out Bri, you never know...!
I can't do much about my circumstances right now (except be sensible) so I am working on my attitude instead. And coming here really helps.
Two things you can to to help yourself - and you're doing them already! Keep it up SG, we're all rooting for you! :grouphug:
I had the next two days All planned out ,
Tomorrow wire and fire a truck scale with a friend I have worked with for close to 20 years, he knows what hes doing and we have fun working togather
and Friday , do a few little piddly jobs close to home , off early to go camping this week end
Then the phone rings , its my boss , ugh rember those 5 Big load cells yew ordered for Cust X , ughhh well their Plant is going to be down all day friday , they want them installed .
Installing 1 or these takes about 3-4 hrs , FUUUUUCCCCKKKKK!!!!!!
Just now the phone rang again , Its a Verry diffacult customer to get along with , she Loves her some Zip though , Ughhh my Rail scale is down what time can you be her inhe morning ??? Soryy but I'm booked for the next 2 days , her " Hold on" , Beep My boss iss confrenced in , So whatime do you want me on site , Howw about 6am , thatss solid Overtime , her OK, so now I havve to Leave at 4am to go fix her rail scale AN then go wire and fire that truck scale !!!
FUUUUUUUCCCCKKKK Mee runnen !!!!!
Seee what happens when you make plans !!!!!!!
Oooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhh Zip! That's such a shame.
Zip, I really think something's wrong with your truck. It just isn't running well. You'd best get it right back to the shop now...
I think I pulled a muscle in my stomach last night during a coughing fit (andI don't know where that came from because I don't have a cold or even a sore throat this morning...I'm thinking maybe I swallowed a bug in my sleep. Yuck!)
I'm tired and have a headache also.
Ouch. Poor you, are you able to stomach aspirin or somesuch?
it's not that bad. I'm just complaining because I can. I'll be alright. I just wont be doing any pelvic floor excercises for a few days. ;)
Sundae, do you know anything about the people who are buying the pub? Is the main concern not being able to live there, or are you worried about job security too?
I'm more worried about somewhere to live - I get £40 a week from the pub and although that's very useful I
can live without it if I have to. I'm mostly concerned about the exchange happening before next payday. That's when I will have enough money for a deposit and a months rent in advance so I can move into another place. Before that and I'm in a very awkward situation.
Damn, thought I'd reconciled myself to that - I've got butterflies again just thinking about it.
Anyway. Just to compound my misery I am still itching like hell. I went to the Doctors on Wednesday and he said I'm having an allergic reaction to something I've eaten. If the hives aren't down by Monday I should go back and they'll give me steroids. Well they're still live and perky and roaming my body with a strange sort of symmetry. The palms of my hands and between my fingers are worst at the moment. If you would like to participate online go out and grab yourself a handful of stinging nettles. Oh and drop a couple on your feet and tickle your underarms while you're at it. From what I saw in the bathroom this morning my sides and back are next on the list.
This - and Diz being really insecure and needing comforting at ridiculous hours - means I've had about 4 hours sleep a night since Monday. Thought "Sod-it!" today and have bought some sleepy anti-histamines (been taking one a day non-drowsy since Tuesday). I've been very good and not double-dosing so far, but I am so miserable with the itch and the tiredness I could just lay down and die. Fingers crossed for some sleep tonight at least.
Sorry to be such a moaner recently.
Oh hon. That sounds really shitty. Don't know if it will help you, but I always find that bathing with oilatum emollient really soothes. It's about a fiver for a small bottle.
Which reminds me. I am a bit upset that my eczema is really bad. It's been pretty flared for the past two or three weeks, but it's crested into nasty over last 48 hours.
*chuckles* I did the double-dose thing on the antihistimines last night and well-overslept this morning.
Sorry, I know it must seem like a walk in the park for people with chronic skin conditions. I'm just feeling sorry for myself!
My angioedema attacks sure aren't fun, so I sympathise with the chronic and the acute skin conditions.
DanaC--I have to be very careful: if I take benadryl too late I pay hell trying to wake up in the morning...but as my symptoms usually flair (flare?)up at the end of the day when the shoes are off or the hands (or face, or ears) have realized something had irritated them that day it's often too late to take anything. Depending on the degree of discomfort, sometimes I do anyway.
"All international circuits are busy to the country you are calling. Please try your call again later."
You're kidding me? What is this, a radio station ticket giveaway? Arrrgh!
I get that message every time I try to call Nigeria, also.
Don't they care that I need that money?
Sorry, I know it must seem like a walk in the park for people with chronic skin conditions. I'm just feeling sorry for myself!
not at all a walk in the park, that looks horrible. The Oilatum Dana mentioned is awsome, although i used to use that for dry skin and would be wary about it inflaming that more... just try a teeny tiny drop to start and if it doesn't irritate it, go for it. it's a good thing to have in the bathroom cabinet. the other thing I've recently got into is Aveeno moisturiser, very soothing in a non-oily, none irritant way.
It looks like something that might also be irritated by humidity -do you have any control over the humidity at work?
How 'bout a good ol' shot of celestone? (a long-acting steriod?) for Sundae and Dana. Usually clears my Danny up pronto. (he's an eczema sufferer, too, Dana)
Sorry, I know it must seem like a walk in the park for people with chronic skin conditions. I'm just feeling sorry for myself!
Trust me honey, that looks like no walk I ever took in a park :P That looks as painful and uncomfortable as any bad eczema flare.
@ Shawnee. Yeah. I am supposed to drop onto hydroxizine 3 times a day when it's bad, but I just find it knocks me out and take it only when needed. Trouble is, as you say, if you leave it too late it sucks your brain out by morning :P
You should take some antihysthamines before bed. Even a double dose wont kill you if it's got enough work to do with the hives.
Just be careful what kind you take though. Some (such as phernergan) are depressants, so you'll feel shitty and grumpy the next day especially if you take a large dose. I try not to take these too much, but they do work really well on things like hives.
I'm more worried about somewhere to live - I get £40 a week from the pub and although that's very useful I can live without it if I have to. I'm mostly concerned about the exchange happening before next payday. That's when I will have enough money for a deposit and a months rent in advance so I can move into another place. Before that and I'm in a very awkward situation.
Damn, thought I'd reconciled myself to that - I've got butterflies again just thinking about it.
Anyway. Just to compound my misery I am still itching like hell. I went to the Doctors on Wednesday and he said I'm having an allergic reaction to something I've eaten. If the hives aren't down by Monday I should go back and they'll give me steroids. Well they're still live and perky and roaming my body with a strange sort of symmetry. The palms of my hands and between my fingers are worst at the moment. If you would like to participate online go out and grab yourself a handful of stinging nettles. Oh and drop a couple on your feet and tickle your underarms while you're at it. From what I saw in the bathroom this morning my sides and back are next on the list.
:2cents:
Allergic reaction to something you ate? Sounds like a cop-out diagnosis to me. Did you tell your doctor about the other stuff going on in your life? Could this be an auto-immune response to the sudden massive increase in stress, worry, anxiety etc. which you quite reasonably undergo when your job and home are put in doubt?
Doesn't stress trigger auto-immune responses? Anyone?
be careful with antihistamines if you're on depression medication.
Doesn't stress trigger auto-immune responses? Anyone?
It's my main trigger with both eczema and asthma. But it's different for different people.
I've seen people break out in hives in response to stress, nasty ones.
I think it's a cop-out diagnosis, too...but, then, I'm not there with SG. Maybe it WAS something she ate.
thing is, the treatment's pretty similar whatever the diagnosis. it's just the preventative care in the future that is dependant on a decent diag.
:2cents:
Allergic reaction to something you ate? Sounds like a cop-out diagnosis to me.
My Doctor is very good and does really
listen. He knows I've been through stress recently as we discussed it as a trigger for my acid reflux in the previous appointment, and again at the one I showed him the hives (then mostly on my belly). His immediate reaction given their appearance and distribution was "food". He could be wrong of course, but as Monster says, the treatment is the same.
be careful with antihistamines if you're on depression medication.
Don't worry, I worked in Medicines Management long enough to check contra-indications. In both purchases I told the pharmacists what I'm on. I think fluoxetine can be a problem, but I didn't get on with that and am on paroxetine instead.
I did get a lovely night's sleep last night - didn't knock me out but I guess kept me drowsy enough not to surface as I do usually. I wasn't even woken by the itching, although my hands are going crazy now. New ones are still coming up so my secret hopes of a knockout dose (for the hives) didn't work either. Probably not medically sound anyway!
I'm going to take some tonight, but not tomorrow night - I don't want to go to the doctors on Monday in a temporary reprieve state. If they're still active I want Dr Bocus to see they're still active. A week is 6 days too long to put up with it imo. Wishful thinking is telling me the rate is slowing down so fingers crossed I am over the worst and won't have to have steroids anyway.
What's upsetting me?
I think I'm drinking too much. I've been stealing more and more alcohol from my parents' liquor cabinet. I did it last night, and again tonight. It's gone from once every three weeks or so to more than once a week.
not good. not good.
whats also not good is how many tries it took me to type that. and how i can hardly stand up.
so...are you drunk right now or hungover? Either state is hellish. My sympathies.
Don't worry Ibs - it's just self-indulgence not habit.
But given how it might end - stop now. You'll have plenty of time to develop bad habits in college, you don't need any practice beforehand.
yeah im pretty drunk.
like can't type or sit up straight drunk.
shit.
i dont like being drunk.
fuck, i dont even like drinking or anything
i dont know why i do it
why do i feel numb all over?
shit.i should probably go to sleep.
whhy do i do this? i dont enjoy it. Its downright painful to actually get the alcohol down (especially with my throat in as much pain as it already is, i think im getting sick), and i dont enjoy being drunk. why the fuck do i drink?
sg: yeah. i really should stop.
the problem is
i dont even think of myself as a 'drinker'
like if people ask i say
oh yeah, nah, i dont really drink
its hard to stop something you dont even think of yourself as doing
and its also hard to type. shit.
i think im going to bed.
so i just walked through the living room
and actually had a (fortunately brief) conversation with my mother
and then the first thing i did when i got back to my room is sit down and promptly fall over. shit.
Are you drinking out of boredom or stress? Maybe you need to find something that isn't self-destructive to fill your time.
fuck i can hardly even stand up straight
i dunno how much of it is mental and how much is the alcohol
but shit
im out of it
and sorry im like posting so much right in a row.
my bad.
um i wouldnt say im BORED.. or stressed for that matter.
well okay, maybe i am. bored cuz ive got nothing to do on a saturday night but play quake and drink, andl listen to prince, and stressed cuz ive got a ton of homework im totally not doing, but... meh.
i really dont know why i do it. attention maybe. that seems most plausible.god knows im enough of a little attention whore already.
i really do feel like im numb. all over.
and i just almost fell outta my chair. i think im drunker than ive ever been before
not that thats saying much.
shit.
remind me that im not supposed to do this again.
Ibram, this is your liver speaking. PLease, please stop beating me up. We need each other. I'll never leave you, but you may force me into a break down where I have no choice. Besides, aren't you tired of feeling like shit? I know I am. :thepain:
At first I was thinking this was just regulation teen-age misbehaviour - but that is supposed to make you happy.
A grumpy drunk at your age, Ibram, as you say, is not good.
So now I am thinking subconsciously deliberate self-harm/self-destructive/self-sabotage behaviour. Punishing yourself for not doing the homework which you know you should do, but don't want to do, maybe? Or sabotaging yourself so there is no way you can do it now?
No sympathy right now. I am hoping there might be some aversion therapy value in your suffering.
Here's what I reckon you should do. If you have a spinning desk chair, sit on it and spin round and round as fast as you can twenty times. Then go back the other way. The do it with your face pointing upwards.
We'll get some serious aversion going here!
remind me that im not supposed to do this again.
^^^^^^^^^^DON'T DO THIS AGAIN^^^^^^^^^^^
Shape up boy! You fuck up in school and it's straight in the Army for you... those D.I.s will make a man of your drunken ass. :eyebrow:
Don't do it, Ibby. Look at the mess I made of my life!!!
How fucking stupid are we becoming? I just heard a long commercial on Bloomberg *i couldn't have invented this if i tried* explaining to people that the best way to deal with "cyber bullies" is to "delete the message and ignore them".
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? we really need an ad sponsored by the dept of justice and various councils telling us how to deal with trolls on the internet? if you can't figure it out on your own, you probably deserve to be a quivering slobbering bowl of pathetic stuck in your basement.
and what's more - who are they targetting with that ad? it was on BLOOMBERG.
and what's more - who are they targetting with that ad? it was on BLOOMBERG.
little kids who use BLOOMBERG and aren't big enough to protect themselves.
[youtube]X4GZfvXx9Js[/youtube]
ooh, I LOVE the one with the clown in the background.
My best friend of 40 years may have hepititis. I hadn't seen her in a few months, and last week we visited them. She looked absolutely awful, pale, with unexplained bruising, including a full on black eye. Her pupils were freaking yellow. So I pulled her husband aside and said get her to the damn doctor, or I will. So today they went, and are waiting for test results.
You know what? I wish someone would do one of those Intervention episodes with me where I get sent to a fat farm for 30-60 days. I think that would do me a world of good.
I'm not losing weight...in fact, I recently hit 400 lbs. I just can't seem to stick to reasonable eating and exercise anymore. I go to the doctor Monday and will be willing to entertain his suggestions.
I'm not ready to die, but I feel like I'm at the end of my rope with my weight.
You know what? I wish someone would do one of those Intervention episodes with me where I get sent to a fat farm for 30-60 days. I think that would do me a world of good.
I'm not losing weight...in fact, I recently hit 400 lbs. I just can't seem to stick to reasonable eating and exercise anymore. I go to the doctor Monday and will be willing to entertain his suggestions.
I'm not ready to die, but I feel like I'm at the end of my rope with my weight.
Good luck, Sycamore. I hope your doctor is able to help. In the past few years, I've gained a bunch of weight myself, and it just doesn't seem to want to come off. I think much of my problem is lack of exercise and the slowing of the metablism which sometimes accompanies getting a little older. You have my sympathy and don't you dare die.
Ahhh, Binky that's tough.
The most positive way to address it in your head is that whatever she has, she has had for some time and at least it will now be addressed and treated medically.
Syc - I feel your pain. Over the years I have yo-yo'd up and down, but my ups are gettign higher and higher. I fear I will end up one of those women I occasionally see who are in motorised chairs because they are too fat to walk (and I assume have other obesity related health issues). Either that or I'll be the raddled old crone who came in with greasy hair, dirty clothes and counted out her coppers for a pint of Stella the other night. Although I think she had mental health issues to be fair - she could have bought alcohol from a shop much cheaper.
The nurse who runs the weight loss clinic is back at the doctors this week. I've been meaning to call for an appointment, but when I remember the office is full. It's empty now... but by the time I call and explain and wait and blah blah blah I bet someone will walk back in.
Damn - I was in at 09.00 this morning (we don't usually open until 10.00 but an artist wanted an early start). Should've called then.
Keep us updated.
You know what? I wish someone would do one of those Intervention episodes with me where I get sent to a fat farm for 30-60 days. I think that would do me a world of good.
I'm not losing weight...in fact, I recently hit 400 lbs. I just can't seem to stick to reasonable eating and exercise anymore. I go to the doctor Monday and will be willing to entertain his suggestions.
I'm not ready to die, but I feel like I'm at the end of my rope with my weight.
Any chance you and the Mrs. can work together on this? Meal planning / morning walk together. It is really hard to change things as half a couple. For me controlling this stuff starts at the grocery store. If junk food gets in the house I will eat it. Good luck bro. Let me know if I can help. Maybe we could develop a behavior mod program?
I hear you all, loud and clear! Let's be each other's support group. Lord knows the support I get at home is "next week we should start walking."
I'm so sorry, binky, but you did the right thing.
Syc---I feel your pain, too. All I did from Oct 2007 to about NOW is lay on the couch, then, in moments inspired, went to bed; rinse, repeat.
I MUST work on strength conditioning but I feel too tired most days to do anything more than is strictly required to live. My dad came over and berated me for not watering my plants outside. How lazy is that?
I eat healthy in spurts and then, at 2.00 a.m. I walk to the cupboard and get out two cupcakes. It's nuts.
How fucking stupid are we becoming? I just heard a long commercial on Bloomberg *i couldn't have invented this if i tried* explaining to people that the best way to deal with "cyber bullies" is to "delete the message and ignore them".
Stolen.
This is not school. Anybody is free to leave. Anybody is free to not read what someone else has written. Anybody is free to use the handy "ignore" function. Our parents (and the state) aren't making us show up here at 8:00 every morning.
So, while I don't want to seem callous, it's beyond me how anybody can feel "bullied" in an environment where it's so easy to avoid a person altogether.
Oh, look. SteveDallas invented the internet.
next he'll be complaining about having an election stolen from him.
next he'll be complaining about having an erection stolen from him.
Originally Posted by lookout123
next he'll be complaining about having an erection given to him.
fixed-er.
Stolen?!
I can't *give* them away.
Speaking of stolen, Mrs. Dallas got in our car to drive to a gig this afternoon. The satellite radio and GPS are gone. (The satellite radio would be visible from our side, especially the antenna, but the GPS was in the glove box. The car hadn't moved from when I parked it in our driveway when I got home from work about 6PM yesterday. Very obnoxious.
Man, that sucks Steve. I guess they didn't break a window or anything, it was just unlocked?
I guess. I think I locked it when I got home from work... I usually do... but I can't be 100% sure. And when Mrs. Dallas left she just hit the unlock button on the key, so she had no way to tell if it had been locked or not. The car has an alarm, so I guess I'd rather assume it was unlocked than that they jimmied the alarm and left no sign of it.
Had a friend whose car was broken into just for a disposable camera lying on the front seat. That's it. Can't trust anybody to be decent citizens these days :headshake
What's mildly upsetting my world: indecisive women. Make. Up. Your. Mind. It's not that hard you pea brained bimbo.
People suck. I hope the bastards get enough money for your stuff to buy a sufficient amount of dope to OD on.
Well considering we paid $100 for the GPS and our most likely satellite radio replacement is $70 minus a $50 rebate... they won't go far.
Bonus: A cop just came to take our report, not that we expect anything to come from it. He commented on the instrument cases and music stands in our living room... turns out his daughter is on a full college scholarship as a double bass player. He encouraged our kids to stick with the music.... he thinks it's been so great for his kids. My daughter was, predictably, rolling her eyes through the whole thing.
Very obnoxious.
Very. :mad:
Speaking of stolen, Mrs. Dallas got in our car to drive to a gig this afternoon. The satellite radio and GPS are gone. (The satellite radio would be visible from our side, especially the antenna, but the GPS was in the glove box. The car hadn't moved from when I parked it in our driveway when I got home from work about 6PM yesterday. Very obnoxious.
A group or groups have been traveling the east coast doing this for months. They've hit places as far south as Virginia and as far north (that I know of) into NY. They hit over 2 dozen on my neighborhood and I've heard from friends that they same type of thing has happened where they live. Typically they are NOT breaking into cars - just checking for unlocked doors and taking whats there.
My left eye is completely bloodshot! It doesn't hurt or itch yet. I guess I left my contacts in for too many weeks, but usually I can tell because they start to bother me. Plus, I only remember having them in for 3 weeks, doesn't usually cause a problem. It's really frustrating, I really don't want to go to the doc for the special drops I need. I hope it goes away on its own.
My husband often doesnt lock his jeep and every once in a while it gets 'raided'. Most of the time we are clueless that it even happens. We think its just kids checking all the unlocked cars for loose change.
HOW COME NOBODY CARES ABOUT DARFUR?
Sorry to hear about what happened, Steve. I went through the exact same shit two weeks ago. I think the whole thing has so far cost me...eh, 3-4 hours of my time and about $300.
so, that, and my addiction to percocets...otherwise, I'm cool.
I thought the whole point of percocet was to
not be upset. I also hope you are using the term as in "I will always have an addiction even though I am currently clean".
I'm Jewish. All I know is worry and guilt.;)
Thanks, Rich. Yes, I am clean, baby, clean!
Of all things chemical--liquid, solid, gas...all of 'em. :angel:
Yeah, but you still have a dirty mind... thankfully. :blush:
I HATE the word addiction when it comes to pain medicine. Its not an addiction when it is used to stop pain! I used it for 6 months and needed it every single day (and every 6 hours) of that time.
I know Iknow..its gets abused horribly. But because of that I suffered, I was never allowed quite enough pills to manage the pain entirely.
Pico, this is the cellar. we know our addictions inside and out.
Im sorry...
I knew after I hit post that I probably jumped in much too rashly.
Pico, this is teh cellar. Sorry is not an option.
kewl....:cool:
Still though, I dont know Bri's history, so...
Bri, Im glad you dont need the percocet anymore. Even though those pills are a godsend, they still suck.
My first driving lesson this morning was okay, but I feel really frustrated because my instructor wouldn't just shut up and let me try... well, driving! I'd try to turn the wheel a little, and he'd jerk it back. If I was going slow, he'd say "Give it gas, girl, give it gas! The car will stop if you don't give it gas!" (Thank you, Captain Obvious. I may be a first-time driver but I'm not a complete idiot.) If I sped up a little, I'd feel the brake pedal disappearing under my foot as he braked on my behalf from his side of the car. I'm still at the "getting used to how the car moves" part, and my instructor was already at the "hey, you totally fucked up that four way stop" section.
I asked to take my husband's car out, this evening, so I could practice a little, but he drives a stick shift. Bad idea. After I stalled the second time, I burst into tears, mumbling something along the lines of "I just want to drive in circles!" We're borrowing a friend's automatic tomorrow so I can do exactly that.
For now, though, I just feel like a complete and utter failure. :sniff:
So, my car got
booted 2 months ago...I touched upon it here.
Well, it almost happened again today. We deliver to these employees inside one of the parking garages at the hospital complex. We go into the garage, give them their food, they validate our parking ticket and away we go.
Some POS security guy tried to tell me that I couldn't park where I did when I was dropping off food today. We had a pissing match for a minute, then when I went up to the customer and told them that security was giving me trouble, the guy backed off. But I was just so full of rage...I really wanted to beat the shit out of the guy. That doesn't happen very often.
Incidentally, I was involved in a shouting match with someone that I raced on the street Friday night. When the bitch started cussing at me, I let off a torrent of words that I've never said in public to someone before, particularly, "fat fucking cow."
I think I'm just really stressed the fuck out about my health right now. But I'm calmed down again, me and the doc talked about shit today, he put on a new med and we'll see how things go.
I'm pretty upset about LJ's passing, despite his protestations that he's not quite dead yet.
We had our differences back in the day, but he is a good egg...I consider him a friend. I'll miss him terribly, that cock.
We went house browsing on our way home last evening and had an awesome balloon sighting... there was a group in the sky all above/around this development we were looking at. As we were leaving were leaving we drove directly under one (a mostly yellow one) about 15-20 feet above us, with the kids laughing and waving out the sunroofs.
Anyway, I was watching the news today and saw that one of the balloons
crashed.
This one
Man. At least in a plane you have some control over where you're gonna crash.
Plane or balloon, if it explodes, you're fucked. :(
more bleeding
:(
What does your doctor say?
That's terrible - I hope the kids didn't put it all together and get freaked out. Nice pic though
Man. At least in a plane you have some control over where you're gonna crash.
You do in a balloon too. Down and usually on the ground somewhere.
Up, up in the air, in my beautiful my beautiful ballooonnnn...aaa[COLOR="Gray"]aaaa[/COLOR][COLOR="Silver"]aaaa[/COLOR][COLOR="White"]aaaaa[/COLOR]. crunch.
Says the meanest mom *EVAR!!
What upsets me today:
Instructors at a podunk school who act like they teach at Harvard or something. Read: big pompous asshats.
:(
What does your doctor say?
Not much because I'm just short of 12 weeks. Wait for the scan in another couple of weeks and if all is well, then still don't do much. If all is not well, then I guess we have to make some decisions.
We went house browsing on our way home last evening and had an awesome balloon sighting... there was a group in the sky all above/around this development we were looking at. As we were leaving were leaving we drove directly under one (a mostly yellow one) about 15-20 feet above us, with the kids laughing and waving out the sunroofs.
Anyway, I was watching the news today and saw that one of the balloons crashed.
This one
*sigh* I'll never look at ballons the same way, what with LJ's passing and all.
Of all the things that you would have thought would kill Jim--an angry customer, his overwhelming curiosity...no...it was a hot-air balloon.
Of all the things that you would have thought would kill Jim--an angry customer, his overwhelming curiosity...no...it was a hot-air balloon.
Can't have been. It's still a day early. Insensitive bastard.
Mean people, health issues, and mean people.
if you combine those you'll be happy again. you can always smile to yourself when you know the mean people also have health issues.
And some of 'em are decidedly unattractive. ;)
And some of 'em are decidedly unattractive. ;)
I knew I'd regret posting my picture on here.
You are neither mean nor unattractive, so hush.
Ive got my new glasses and I cant seem to see quite right out of them. If one lens works the other doesn't, depending on how I move my head. They told me to give it a week for my eyes to adjust. I'm thinking thats sort of shady dealings right there now. I think I'm going to bite the bullet (and forget about the already $600 Ive paid ) and get the damn surgery.
depending on how I move my head.
You mean like lining your pupils up with the center of the lenses? If that's the case, they might have gotten your
pupillary distance wrong.
They remeasured it and didn't seem to think that was the problem. But I will go back in a few days to try that again. They are the invisible line trifocal lens. They kind of suck in that there is a really small focus area in each lens for each correction. Also, at the same time they are corrected for really bad nearsightness and astigmatism.
I hate my eyes.
The tri-focals are very difficult to get used to. Some people never do, while others adjust over time. They seem to be trying to do too much for me, I mean if you have your head turned or tilted in one direction and look through the "wrong" part of the lens then your vision will be blurred or otherwise obscured. They only work when you are looking directly at a specific object. If there are multiple images in your line of sight and they are at differing distances, it becomes increasingly difficult to process the info and focus.
They are not for me - that's for sure.
edit: I am not an optometrist nor optician, I just play on on teh Cellar.
Today, my return from the dentist belongs here.
:thepain:
The tri-focals are very difficult to get used to. Some people never do, while others adjust over time.
These are my third pair with a second increase in correction. (The Doc said my eye are 5-10 years older than the rest of me -
just great) so I do know how weird they are to adjust to. Im not entirely sold on that being my problem though. When I look straight ahead now and hold my hand first in front of one eye and then the other, there is a noticeable difference in sharpness. Im gonna have to go back and have them fix this. I had to do the same thing with my last pair.
Bri stole my minion. Very uncool of her, is she just too lazy to get her own? I've had that minion most of my life, now that its gone there is a whole in my heart. I don't know if I can go on.
I've been stressing over this possible issue for well over a week now. Now the possible issue is a hard fact. I just returned from a meeting that has my stomach churning.
I fucked up monumentally.
This has absolutely nothing to do with my clients, their families, their cats,dogs, iguanas, or money. This is simply a Lookout and family problem.
When I first formed my company I didn't spend the ultra big bucks on a fancy dancy top end lawyer. I DID hire a professional with experience in the arena after receiving a number of referrals in that direction. For unrelated, ongoing performance issues I severed that business relationship about 4 months ago.
After now working with my new professional and getting outside opinion on an issue it turns out a couple of very crucial errors were made in forming my company and those errors were compounded by the accounting side of things as time went on. I now have a problem with a lot of zeros that has essentially wiped out my business reserves and personal finances. :thepain:
My mistakes, my responsibility.
The upside is that at least the problem is known, can be fixed, and the way to fix it, while painful, is pretty straightforward.
On that note, if I'm not around here much it doesn't mean I'm dead. It just means I have to be a grown up and clean up my mess.:sniff:
Try not to kill eachother in the buildup to the election, I want the cellar intact when I come back.
Good luck to you, cuz. I'm sure you'll get things straightened out in no time, then you can come back and we can argue politics. :)
Oh shit Lookout. I'm sorry. That really sucks.
Ouch Lookout! Best of luck, I'm sure your resourcefulness will pull you through. We'll all miss you.
Dude. Kick that problem's ass and get back in here ASAP.
this one case where second best Dont work out !!!
Sorry to hear of this , stay strong , this to shall pass
Good luck friend. Hurry back.
:thepain2:
Sorry to hear that, Lookout. Good luck.
Best of luck, Lookout. I hope you recover quickly and I wish you and your family the best.
Hope you get it sorted soon Lookout. Hurry back. *hugs*
Ouch, that really sucks. Hope things are better soon.
Lookout, I was going to make some smart comment about the $100 for Clodfobble finishing her count down, but I just can't do it.
I hope you get things straightened out.
Good luck man. Focus all your energy and get it done.
If you deal with this the way you deal with asshole soccer coaches, I have no doubt you'll be back where you should be in short order. meanwhile perhaps we should change your name to Luckout123 ;)
Good luck, lookout. Hope things are fixed in as painless a way as possible. :/
How about, Lookup123?
yeah i guess luckout has two interpretations...
Get back soon, I can tell people are already thinking about whom they'll kick in the cunt while you're gone.
Be well and go take care of that which needs to be dealt with.
I'm so sorry, L. I'm very scared of something similar happening with my own company, even though I'm just a sole proprietor for now. I'm not the best at managing those little administrative details the way I should. It'll pass, and you'll be stronger for it.
Just a bump in the road, for a winner. You'll deal with this. :thumb:
What jinx said.
Work it out, and good luck with it.
All my best thoughts to you
Sorry to hear this has set you back
Sending positives vibes your way Lookout!
As a buddy of mine's Scottish soccer coach used to say:
"Ya can put the ball in the net laddie, but fer Crissakes do some road work."
Do the laps, we know you can, and get back in here; We miss you already!
My best piece of ceramics got broken. 'Swhat happens when you use stuff, though. But still :(
Rest In Pieces, butter dish
Oh Monster that is one big quelle Dommage. Cool glaze on that sucker. Is it beyond glue or are you one who believes in the unviolated sanctity of ceramics?
You don't have to quit butter though! there is hope.
smash the pieces into smaller smithers (smithereens, if you will) and re glue them to form a new sort of pastiche or melange or what have you and make something new. A phoenix arising from the smashes!
onlly the handle is bust. glue, stop using, try to make another....
*sigh*
I just cameback from ceramics/pub with a pie dish to match....
As always, THIS DAMN JOB. :mad2:
My upper respiratory infection and my very naughty drunken behavior last night.
Naughty? I must have missed the naughty part. I thought things were fairly tame.
You left faaar too early, then...
Good luck, Lookout.
Horse dude is in hospital....he does security on the weekends and got king hit with a baseball bat during a hold up at a service station.
Oh and I am back at work.
Mean people, health issues, and mean people.
Health issues? What's wrong?
The thing that's upsetting me today is leaving Friday night chat before MTP got really naughty.
Oh and I am back at work.
So now you're getting screwed a different way. :(
Best wishes for Lookout (and Horse-guy).
Say, is chat archived anywhere?
So now you're getting screwed a different way. :(
Yeah, and its really disappointing.
Horse dude is back at work.....:right: ...friggen workaholic.
Naughty? I must have missed the naughty part. I thought things were fairly tame.
Yeah, turns out, ya did miss it. Sorry Ibz and Fstop.
I woke up to Sarah Palin's less than soothing voice on the radio this morn. 4, 8, 12, or 16 years of that...
I slipped and fell right on my face at school this afternoon.
Holy Fuck, Ibby.....that looks painful.
Whats dental like over there?
Did you go to the dentist?
yeah.. it looked a lot worse before the dentist patched it up.
Oooooooooooooow!
You poor thing.
That looks hellishly painful.
A friend of mine collapsed with dehydration in a club one summer and bit right through her lower lip. She had the added indignity of the club security telling the ambulance staff that she must be on drugs and having to painfully enunciate to the hospital that she wasn't.
Hope you get fixed up as good as new!
Bad news in my life: the cleaner’s daughter brought her dog in this morning (a Staffordshire Bull Terrier no less) and it chased Diz under the floorboards in the bathroom before I grabbed it and ejected it
He can get out – he’s been down there before - but he might not want to for a few days
When I left home he was growling rhythmically, probably as much to comfort himself as in protest
He wasn’t even interested in the ham I was dangling (and enticing saying, “Look! Hammy-ham-ham!”
I'm going to go back at lunchtime and check he's okay. Well, if not okay then at least still breathing.
When I went downstairs they all found it quite funny
I think I will go round to her house and scare her dog so much that he lies under a bed whimpering and refusing to come out for days and then have a good old belly laugh about it
Present company excepted of course, but dog owners are evil. Even Jesus said so - it was cut out of the Sermon on the Mount during the Middle Ages.
OW Ibz! How am I supposed to drunkenly make out w/ you now?
That sucks Sundae! I have my dogs, but I would be really upset if they caused that kind of trouble to someone's cat. Of course, the only one that would is the black lab, and I don't take him places that he could. Although, he catches cats in our yard, but their dumb for not paying attention to the "Beware Dog" signs :). Our cat sits in the window and purposely taunts him, the screen on my parents' window is all torn up from him losing his head and going after the cat. Hehe, that cat is evil.
Ibz....good thing you didn't have that when you and I and MTP were fiddling about. I'd have been about set off by that pic, damn does that look painful. Worst thing I can think of any kind of impact trauma would be to the teeth. Hit my head, hit my body, hit my legs, but good Lord, don't hit my teeth.
Meanwhile, back at the ranch, NASA is worried that they're
running out of astronauts.
Send me the fuck up there! I don't care, it's cool with me!
Oooooooooooooow!
You poor thing.
That looks hellishly painful.
A friend of mine collapsed with dehydration in a club one summer and bit right through her lower lip. She had the added indignity of the club security telling the ambulance staff that she must be on drugs and having to painfully enunciate to the hospital that she wasn't.
Hope you get fixed up as good as new!
Bad news in my life: the cleaner’s daughter brought her dog in this morning (a Staffordshire Bull Terrier no less) and it chased Diz under the floorboards in the bathroom before I grabbed it and ejected it
He can get out – he’s been down there before - but he might not want to for a few days
When I left home he was growling rhythmically, probably as much to comfort himself as in protest
He wasn’t even interested in the ham I was dangling (and enticing saying, “Look! Hammy-ham-ham!”
I'm going to go back at lunchtime and check he's okay. Well, if not okay then at least still breathing.
When I went downstairs they all found it quite funny
I think I will go round to her house and scare her dog so much that he lies under a bed whimpering and refusing to come out for days and then have a good old belly laugh about it
Present company excepted of course, but dog owners are evil. Even Jesus said so - it was cut out of the Sermon on the Mount during the Middle Ages.
Our dog is afraid of our cats(of course he is also afraid of the mixer, the blender, brooms and mops, and oddly - square things in general)
We have a cat that wants to be a dog. We call her the 'puppy cat'. She's the only cat that's allowed outside because she doesn't really do anything except follow the dogs around. If they run to the fence because someone's going past, she runs to the fence. If they sit on their beds, she sits there with them. If they lay in my garden, she lays in the garden.
I wont be surprised at all if i hear her start barking one day.
I used to have a cat that loved to ride in our car. He would even hang his head out the window like a dog. That, and the fact that he weighed 20 lbs (and was not a fat cat) got him a lot of stares
My brother's family used to include a smoke coloured cat by the name of Frank. My dog, my mum's dog and the puppy my brother brought in to Frank's domain, were all completely terrorized by Frank.
On one memorable occasion, Dante (mum's dog, Pilau's bro) came howling out of the living room with Frank hissing behind him. Dan was about 13 weeks old at the time, he was so frightened he was actually shitting as he ran...
Frank also had a penchant for riding my brother's Rhodesian Ridgeback, once it had grown-up. Nothng like a fatdog running round the house trying to dislodge a screeching cat...
Of course, outside the house he was a cat that got chased...by the dogs he had quite effectively trained to be wary of cats :P
It's not making me unhappy, but just an update.
No sight not sound nor sign of Diz anywhere last night. I searched the whole flat. He hadn't even touched the ham I left temptingly on the bathroom steps.
I convinced myself he had died of fright somewhere under the floorboards.
Then about 04.00 this morning I had the pat pat pat of Diz trying to removed my eye-mask. I made a sleepy fuss of him and we snuggled til the morning, when I overslept and was woken by Martin the owner who is covering while John is away. He's intensely Irish, about 70, foul mouthes, pessimistic and deaf as a post (when he wants to be).
So there I was, naked, legs akimbo, and Martin is halfway into the room saying, "Bejesus, whit taime de ye hev ta be at work? Ye'll be fecking late so ye will" etc etc, all the time sneaking a peek at my norks and lady garden!
Anyway, the upshot is Diz was in hiding again when I got up, but at least I know he's okay. And at least I'm not working with Martin tonight!
Sundae, you are, as always, a gem of a storyteller. that out of the way, I am soooooooo glad you've Diz back...I was worried there.
And you're so lucky---getting told off my an old Irishman. What a treat! :) Reminds me of my grandpap...
I have a cowboy hat the size of a grape which is causing me pain all the time. Never had one before.
(you know what I'm talking about)
So there I was, naked, legs akimbo, and Martin is halfway into the room saying, "Bejesus, whit taime de ye hev ta be at work? Ye'll be fecking late so ye will" etc etc, all the time sneaking a peek at my norks and lady garden!
Holy cats woman you are flexible!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/AkimboFrom the same article:
Until recent times (the 1980s or thereabouts), the term was almost exclusively arms akimbo, with little involvement of the legs; it seems that it was first creatively used to describe sitting cross-legged. More recently, the term has been adapted still further, giving a second sense of limbs being splayed out rather than merely bent.
I wasn't merely bent, I was splayed (short for displayed I fear)
haha I pictured your legs bent up around your waist!
It's not making me unhappy, but just an update.
No sight not sound nor sign of Diz anywhere last night. I searched the whole flat. He hadn't even touched the ham I left temptingly on the bathroom steps.
I convinced myself he had died of fright somewhere under the floorboards.
Then about 04.00 this morning I had the pat pat pat of Diz trying to removed my eye-mask. I made a sleepy fuss of him and we snuggled til the morning, when I overslept and was woken by Martin the owner who is covering while John is away. He's intensely Irish, about 70, foul mouthes, pessimistic and deaf as a post (when he wants to be).
So there I was, naked, legs akimbo, and Martin is halfway into the room saying, "Bejesus, whit taime de ye hev ta be at work? Ye'll be fecking late so ye will" etc etc, all the time sneaking a peek at my norks and lady garden!
Anyway, the upshot is Diz was in hiding again when I got up, but at least I know he's okay. And at least I'm not working with Martin tonight!
I love you Sundae! Norks and lady garden? I LMAO!
The dentist's receptionist/assistant/office manager called me yesterday.
"Hello MrV, I'm just calling to remind you of your appointment tomorrow."
"When are you going to stop calling me!?"
"hahaha... um.."
"Ok. I'll be there. But I'm running out of teeth to drill."
I leave in ten minutes. :groan:
SD-I'm glad Diz is alright, he just needs some time to completely recover.
F3-No I don't know what you're talking bout, prob don't want to know, but I hope it gets better.
BV-I feel for ya, I've gotten to go to the dentist a lot. None of my baby teeth fell out on their own.
Me: I'm kinda melancholic/pensive, I'm missing a good friend who basically disappeared on me about half a month ago. No idea whats going on and I'm full of doubts and worries. He's been on my mind all day. Also my date is postponed 'till next weekend, although not that bad, just more time for me to get nervous about it.
"Bejesus, whit taime de ye hev ta be at work? Ye'll be fecking late so ye will" etc etc, all the time sneaking a peek at my norks and lady garden!
I agree, you are quite the storyteller. Eloquent in the wording, there.
Something inside me pictured Billy Connolly doing this one. :cool:
As well, while I'm at it, that lucky fucker, picking about his eyes on the lady garden. That devil.
I work at one of the big Investmant Banking firms in Manhattan and there have been reporters lined up all around the outside of our building all day long and everytime I step out they keep asking if they can ask me a few questions. When I tell them I have no comment they follow me to my little smoking spot and just start asking away, "what's the general 'feeling' upstairs?", "how do you feel about blah blah blah?", and the crazy part is they got both entrances covered so it's like we're trapped in here.
It's fucking cloudy again.
F3-No I don't know what you're talking bout, prob don't want to know, but I hope it gets better.
How are cowboy hats like hemorrhoids?
Sooner or later every asshole gets one!
We had 11 and a half inches of rain this past weekend, my drive way is a swamp and still not dry after 3 semi loads of sand. Hurry up sunshine I need to get some gravel down.
When was the last time you got 11 and a half inches?
I used to be awesome at writing papers, I'd sit down, grab a pencil, and write. Paper would be done in an hour or so, I'd type it out, edit, fix my mistakes and voila.
For some reason once I entered college it became a big deal. Now it takes me FOREVER to be able to even start a paper, and then I get all frozen up about it, I avoid them like the plague which usually means they turn out late, but once I actually get one written, even with deducted points I still get good grades.
It's frustrating as all get out to not be able to figure out why I can't do this properly anymore. It's like waking up and realizing you can't remember how to move your legs to get out of bed.
I used to be awesome at writing papers, I'd sit down, grab a pencil, and write. Paper would be done in an hour or so, I'd type it out, edit, fix my mistakes and voila.
For some reason once I entered college it became a big deal. Now it takes me FOREVER to be able to even start a paper, and then I get all frozen up about it, I avoid them like the plague which usually means they turn out late, but once I actually get one written, even with deducted points I still get good grades.
It's frustrating as all get out to not be able to figure out why I can't do this properly anymore. It's like waking up and realizing you can't remember how to move your legs to get out of bed.
I hear ya. I'm a writer, for heaven's sake. You'd think that doing a research paper would be cake. It's not that much harder than writing articles, press releases, or whatnot, just sort of different. I have approximately eight of them to do this quarter, and the thought of what's looming ahead gives me a tummy full of flutters. :eek:
I can't get into details, but there is something I should do, it would be best for all. I was all ready to take the necessary steps when the time came up. Well its come up. And I can't I just can't. It'd be like purposely ripping out my own heart and stomping on it. I've started to, get part of the way through and its like I'm physically in pain. Agh! It ought to be such an easy decision to go through, and its just ridiculously hard. It'll happen whether I initiate it or not, I guess I'll just go through the pain later.
Slipped on the stairs on Saturday. My left foot just slid out from under me and I slithered down the last four steps. No biggie, except that being in the pub, there was a locked door to crash into. I sat and heaved with pain for a while, then bumped back up the stairs on my bott. I retired to my room in distress, until I heard John come up to get some change and despatched him for a towel and ice.
Sunday, he took me to A&E. Hmmmm. I will defend state healthcare until it kills me, but London A&E has, is and always will be a miserable experience. Still, I got x-rays and painkillers and a ride in a wheelchair from a lovely porter, so it was worth 5 hours wait. Ahem.
All clear of course, I just bruise and swell easily and scare everyone with the inflatable look of my peripheries. So yesterday was resting, icing, compressing and elevating. Back to work today. Bloody hurts though - I feel like The Little Mermaid down one side.
Don't worry - I'll take a picture for you.
Bugger, Sundae, that's a shit way to spend a Sunday!
Hope you're all better soon m'dear. And yes, pics please!
Yeah, and I don't think John "came up to get change," either. He was lookin' to get lucky oncet again and gaze upon that garden of yourn.
Ouch! Sorry to hear about your fall. That picture in the other thread looks really painful.
Yeah, and I don't think John "came up to get change," either. He was lookin' to get lucky oncet again and gaze upon that garden of yourn.
Nah, it's Martin who's the cheeky monkey - John is a real gentleman, in every sense of the word.
Is John the guy I met? The one I borrowed a lighter from?
If so he seemed lovely.
Yes, I think it probably was.
He has been so good to me - not only letting me stay there but on times like the weekend when he fed Diz for me, brought me up a drink as well as ice for my foot and took me to and from the hospital, which would have been at least £15 each way in a taxi.
And the people who work in the kitchen left me the Broccoli and Stilton soup because I didn't get my usual pub meal (as I wasn't working) and they know I really like it. Had it for tea and for lunch today, nom nom nom.
I've been very lucky with the people I've met this year, I really have.
Oh dear, I hope you're feeling better.
Of course you have good friends. You are a giving and caring person, and deserve tenfold in return.
Ha - just said the same to you on the other thread :)
Great minds, my friend, great minds.
Eeesh, I better get to work. I'm running on full adrenaline right now!
Hitting up this thread again - trying to keep my moaning off the main board.
I'm just fed up of being in pain now.
Not big pain. Not important pain like other Dwellars have had to put up with,
And I do know there will be an end to this pain.
But I'm fed up with the swelling, the shuffling, the walking-on-knives feeling.
Gah.
And I have decided mothers are the most selfish people in the world - although I am aware there are exceptions - I met one this morning. Now I usually walk very quickly. And I am aware of my surroundings. If I see a woman coming along with a kid on a bike or scooter I will step into the road or cross to the other side - they take up the whole pavement, I am willing and able to move. Similarly if there are two mums with pushchairs, or a gaggle of small children, or an old person with a stick etc etc.
But when I am obviously limping. When I am using a garden wall for support. When I am obviously watching the ground for uneven pavement... Guess who has to stop to let them pass? Me. Still. It doesn't help that sod's law dictates we will pass at the precise point where someone has their bin out on the pavement, or there is a tree or a lamp-post, ie the narrow part. But why can't they look with their eyes and see that I'm shuffling along as fast as I can go, obviously in some pain (you don't limp unless it hurts to walk!) and just move to one side. I'm not asking for special treatment really, just some of the same courtesy I show to others when I am in rude health.
BTW - a woman carrying a toddler stopped to let me pass this morning. I gave her a big smile and a thank you. She was the exception, but a very welcome one.
Sorry - I've run out of painkillers and am working tonight in the pub and Diz wasn't around last night (so I am worried about him) and all that.
Good moaning, Sundae. It's a beautiful day.
(Have you had your foot X-rayed? Maybe something is broken.)
I love you Sundae! Norks and lady garden? I LMAO!
Seconded. In fact, all the recent posts (in the "upsetting" thread no less) are making me laugh. The cat stories, the dog afraid of "square things in general" -- just LOL!
(Have you had your foot X-rayed? Maybe something is broken.)
Spent 5 hours in Accident & Emergency on Sunday (moaned about somewhere here) for x-rays, so I know it's just soft tissue damage, otherwise I wouldn't be walking on it.
Got some painkillers now. Still grumpy :)
Thank God for painkillers and the relief they bring!
But sorry you need them...Hope it feels better soon.
Tendons? Ligaments? They wont show up on an x-ray. And when you badly twist your ankle that is usually what is damaged - not bone.
Meh - they poked me about a bit, asking what hurt and what didn't, they seemed confident it was just bruising.
I'm wary of their advice that I should exercise it and use it normally though. They (who are "they"?) said that when I was hit by a car. I went back a week later, swollen up like a ballon and black as Newgate's knocker and they admitted I should have continued with R.I.C.E. until the swelling went down.
I'm sure this should have been the same, but I've got to work, sadly. It goes down overnight as I elevate both legs on a rolled up duvet. But it swells up during the day and when I work in the pub.
I promise on Saturday, apart from going to my new house, I will spend the day with my leg elevated until I go to work. And same Sunday until 13.00 and after 17.00. I'm sure that will knock it on the head.
Pocketknife is missing again. Sh*t. And good, since I remember seeing it last in the woods and not since then. Perhaps it is stuck in some pocket or some bag in my gear. Perhaps. Well, the lemonade here is I have some serious FAWET ahead of me in the name of finding my knife.
I've got a pocket knife (Swiss Army variety) that my Mom gave me the Christmas before we moved away from St. Louis (1987). It also has teeth marks on the plastic where my oldest chewed on it as a toddler.
I would be devastated if I lost that knife. Too many memories go along with it. And the thing is, I used to lose knives all the time. I guess it's important enough to me that I'm more aware of it's location.
you need to attach that bloomin' thing on a piece of elastic like toddler's mittens! One of those curly plastic keychains should do it -that's what I use for the kids' cellphones.
So came home night before last, went to log onto my beloved cellar, and to check what atrocities had occured in the orgy thread...I had no service. This was coming but I didn't realize it would be happening so soon! Our apts are switching providers and our new providers haven't set up yet. I've called a million (3 or 4) people about it by now! So, I don't know when I'll get it back up, for now I'll have to see ya'll only at school. Can't check the NSFW pics thats for sure! <3 and miss all!
Woke up this morning with heartburn again.
I've been on Omaprazole for 6 weeks and I took my last tablet on Friday. Today being Sunday it looks like I still need to be on them. Going to get an appointment tomorow and see what the Doctor says. He seemed to think that putting me on them for more than two weeks would give me body a chance to heal.
Once I move I will be changing my lifestyle anyway - I know it's not been healthy since I moved into the pub. And I know lifestyle changes do have an affect on GORD.
But in the meatime I am in a lot of pain. It's very debilitating and it's making me thoroughly miserable.
April and I are moving in with her mom next
month.
Woke up this morning with heartburn again.
I've been on Omaprazole for 6 weeks and I took my last tablet on Friday. Today being Sunday it looks like I still need to be on them.
Is this an acid/histamine blocking drug Sundae? If so, they are known to create dependency ie. you will experience painful withdrawal symptoms.
Doctors over here hand them out like candy... helps build their practice
and gets them lots of free lunches - a win-win [/cynic]
April and I are moving in with her mom next month.
Sorry Sys. . . Try to focus on the positives and watch that debt reduction. Things will work out for ya both in the end.
Prayers headed your way.
Is this an acid/histamine blocking drug Sundae? If so, they are known to create dependency ie. you will experience painful withdrawal symptoms.
Doctors over here hand them out like candy... helps build their practice and gets them lots of free lunches - a win-win [/cynic]
Spelled it wrong - it's
Omeprazole. It's not for my allergy (which went down in the end) it's for heartburn. It's a Proton Pump Inhibitor (PPI) and as far as I know there are no side effects to coming off it - except that the original problem resurfaces.
I didn't wake up with heartburn today, so I've held off making an appointment.
I found a lump in my breast. I am going to ignore the hell out of it. At least until I get the guidelines on my husbands at work health coverage for me. I just read that only 1 out of 5 lumps are cause for alarm. I have good odds here.
Aah! baaah! I don't even have a coverage card in yet, and already trouble.
:eek: I WAS LAID OFF TODAY! :eek:
If anyone needs Linux administration help about now...
Oh wtf?!? Holy shit. (making an exception for the no cuss rule)
Not that you can't do this yourself...There was someone looking...I think this is your area? Or close mebbe?
http://philadelphia.craigslist.org/sad/860922315.html
Sorry UT. I have been laid off a lot lately because of the disposable market, and the best thing I know to do is get right back up on the horse. Don't let this get you down.
This may be an asset and opportunity to move on. Just get out there asap and you might find that it was advantageous in the end. It sucks, I know....You are definitely hireable, and might find a better situation elsewhere.
Anyone of any worth would be pleased to have you on their team. I know this doesn't make up for how crappy you probably feel, so I'll wrap this up. I'll try to send some of my limited amount of good vibes your way. heh. :)
Sorry to hear that UT - you are definitely a marketable commodity and will assuredly land on your feet soon. Well wishes headed your way.
I'm sorry UT. :(
You will overcome.
And Cic? Get your damn ass to the doctor and get that checked out...please? Worry later about the damn cost. Don't make me kick your ass, k?
Oh, that bites, Toad! I am sorry to hear it. I may be able to help you find something remote from here. I will definitely ask around.
:eek: I WAS LAID OFF TODAY! :eek:
Shitballs.
Holy Jesus! That sucks, dude.
Watch for things to happen in the tip jar...
Hey Cic -- if you need a day to figure out the insurance, that's fine, but don't let it go much longer than a day or two. Really.
UT -- may the Force be with you. I hope you find a replacement gig just soon enough that the novelty of the unexpected vacation has juuuust worn off.
OH! UT!!!! Hang in there, cowboy. You're probably in shock right now----just one foot in front of the other, breath in, breath out. Prayers to you!
Cic--I'll kick your ass, too. Get it checked.
Aw, man! I'm really sorry, UT. Somebody needs a cunt-kicking.
For what it's worth, I've found Indeed.com to be the most efficient and thorough jobsearch engine by far.
Holy crap, UT, that sucks.
Can you busk? ;)
:eek: I WAS LAID OFF TODAY! :eek:
If anyone needs Linux administration help about now...
can you cut hair?
Seriously, UT, not cool. Was there any hint?
Holy poop, UT. You will overcome (as said above) but in the meanwhile it's a bu88er. In a week from now things'll look a whole lot rosier, trust me. Maybe even a couple of days will be enough to turn the picture inside out.
Brainstorm all your ideas - we're all rooting for you.
And Cic - get to a DOCTOR, NOW - even though the odds are on your side.
Ah Tony I'm really sorry to hear that.
All my thoughts & wishes are with you in hoping this is very temporary. Well, those that aren't with my brother who is in the same situation :(
Cic - get thee to a nunnery! Or a doctors, preferably. If you have something, then you already have it (if you get what I mean). If it's not a problem then why put yourself through worry. If it is a problem then for God's sake it needs to be sorted sooner rather than later. You're certainly not a coward.
In my bad news (don't even come close to the above) I need to give a stool sample. Doc wants to check me for H Pylori before going any further. I have never done one of these before. I can't even think of how to go about it. The idea is already making me retch. Any tips would be gratefully accepted - either by PM or perhaps in a Stool Sample thread, so no-one chokes on their Cap'n Crunch.
It's only a pea sized sample, but that doesn't help me with the grim logistics of actually... well enough said in this thread.
Just so you know - this is my little poop scoop.
Undertoad-- I'm sending as many good vibes as I can scare up.
Cic--there are places that do free or reduced price mammograms based in income level around here, there are likely to be some around you. Google "New Mexico free mammograms" and check out your local Planned Parenthood or Women's Centers. Something to think about if it's going to take awhile to get the insurance sorted out.
Laughing my *ass* off at the cute little poop scoop. Is that a tupperware product?
SG's right, Cicero...I felt infinitely better when I received the news from my recent butt probe that the polyps were non-cancerous, and I just need to keep an eye on it more frequently (that sounds pretty funny.)
Sending warm wishes to youse guyz!
Good vibes, UnderToad.
What can we do to help? Do you have a CV, geographical limits, whatever that will help guide the process?
I'm an experienced Linux admin in the Philly area. I should find new work in short order, where "short order" is about 4 months. That's my guess -- but the economy could have people jittery about new hires. And so the question is now whether I should take work doing whatever, i.e., installing Direct TV and stuff like that.
I apologize for my stupidity, but I don't know if that is the kind of work that can be done from another location or do you have to be on site.
System administration is generally local -- only because somebody has to locally install the things that let people work remotely.
Nowadays "integrated lights out" is all the rage -- things that let you *really* run a computer from anywhere on the Internet. At my previous job, we became remote sysadmins as much as possible, but there's a limit where somebody actually has to be on site -- to change out disk drives, diagnose hardware problems, that sort of thing.
Sys Adminnery can also get into being there to assist with
PEBKAC/
ID-Ten-T errors.
That sucks, Toad.
I assume you know about monster.com and dice.com?
I assume you know about monster.com and dice.com?
[size=1]Indeed.com is a search aggregator that includes all results from
every jobsite, including industry-specific bulletin boards and individual corporation "careers" pages. Okay, I'm done plugging.[/size]
Sundae....crap in a bowl (you dont like?) scoop the poo and away you go?
Im unsure, just thinking out loud
That SUCKS UT !!!!
Cic Get it checked ASAP !!!!!!
Sg turn off the water to the tolet , fulsh , do yer Doody , grab a sample , turn the water Back on , flush !!
Poo on a pile of loo paper? Then you can just flush the lot.
My upsetting news is the breakup of a couple Dazza and I have been friends with for a number of years. I hope they can get back together.
Also, I miss my family. :(
:eek: I WAS LAID OFF TODAY! :eek:
If anyone needs Linux administration help about now...
Fuck!
That SUCKS UT !!!!
Cic Get it checked ASAP !!!!!!
Sg turn off the water to the tolet , fulsh , do yer Doody , grab a sample , turn the water Back on , flush !!
Sounds like the voice of experience here...
Fuck!
mmmmmmmm...*thoughtful*...UT
could go the gigolo route for a while, I suppose.
I'm heading to the tip jar!! :D
Ute,
I'm sorry to hear that. Do you still have the Catalyst Internet shingle? You could get out there and pound the pavement. Approach small businesses like car dealers and real estate offices....offer your services to give those types of companies whatever kind of edge having really cool gizmos and connectivity could provide them. Offer on call personal service. Most small companies have one or two guys that almost know what they're doing.....and they are the "IT' guys.
If you could offer a program where you go in and overhaul them with minimal hardware expense, and then sell them a monthly installment plan that puts you on retainer for anytime support.....like geeks on call.......??
whatever you do...don't get complacent. if nothing else, you could sell cars.
OMG, how awful.
(thinks good thoughts for you).
both at UT and at Cicero!
The L.A. news - I just hate the way they report a fatal traffic accident as nothing more than a temporary inconvenience for your morning commute. I realize that no one knows the poor sucker who was killed, but how about a little compassion?
UT did you get a chance to check out that Linux admin. link I posted?
Yes - appreciate it, but it's too far, actually; about an hour fifteen away, and in the opposite direction of my sweetie's job where she works an hour away.
UT sucky news. Were you the only one? LIFO? You didn't need that cube farm anyway, you're worth more than that. The cellar currently has that cool new job mojo going, I can feel you're next in line.
...meanwhile, why not give the cellar a nice new tag line -it's sorts like shopping for new clothes to cheer you up, but free....
(and I will be hitting the tip jar later, soon as I get permission ;) )
...
New tag done!
Nothing so obvious, an upper-level manager decided that he didn't like me and targetted me for assassination at first possible opportunity. It happens.
I'm so sorry UT, but I know you'll find something soon (probably an even better job). I think these things happen for a reason.
If I were you, I'd look into working for Seth Rogen as a stunt double.....doing love scenes and taste testing his pottery.
I can haz ______
[He really has a spaniel expression there. Where are the Milk Bones?]
Jebus Freaking Craps...get that fucker a WAHHHHHHHHMBULANCE...WILL HE EVER STOP WHINING? I thought the commercials were enough to make me anxious for the election to be over.
Irritating? I just drove four and a half hours straight... with the ten month old... and get to do it all over again on Sunday (today's Friday, for those of you not paying attention)... then get to do it AGAIN on TUESDAY
Irritating? I just drove four and a half hours straight... with the ten month old... and get to do it all over again on Sunday (today's Friday, for those of you not paying attention)... then get to do it AGAIN on TUESDAY
I'm sorry, you're looking for the
irritating thread, right this way... ;)
How is the gasoline supply in Atlanta now?
Irritating? I just drove four and a half hours straight... with the ten month old...
The things we do to get them to fall asleep.
Gasoline supply in Atlanta... sparse. At best. None of the stations within at LEAST a 20-mile radius have any fuel, that I was able to find today. Putting the baby to SLEEP? Odd... being in the car seemed to wake her up MORE! And you're right, Shawnee... I should have said "upsetting", not "irritating" for this thread... because in all honesty, it's doing BOTH lol!
Lilly, one of our guinea pigs, died today. She's been listless for the last couple of days. Mrs. dar took her to the vet but they wanted $400-$1200 to keep her for observation.
I'm mostly sad for Mrs. dar. She's close to them and brushes and feeds them while she watches TV or reads.
$400! What would it cost for a new one?
$400! What would it cost for a new one?
I think we paid $15 or $20.
slow clock... tick
tock......
tick..................
dangit. time to go CAMPING!!
If you are a plant you are in trouble. Severe frost expected at 4am. Turn back now!! ;)
*blinks* wow, I have been out the loop. UT I just saw this. Must have been a hell of a shock to the system. Probably end up being a blessing in disguise, you have sounded unhappy with your employers for a while.
Cic: hope all's well, honey. Have you been to the docs yet?
@ Dar, bad luck mate. Poor little bugger.
A wild black and white "kitty" just sprayed my front porch! :mad: It was eating the dog's food, I just opened the door and saw it in time to slam the door shut! It still smells to high heaven in here ! Gag!:eyebrow:
lol. Sorry, Nirvana, I just misread that second sentence as 'I was eating the dog's food'....
Well, when you're hungry... :eyebrow:
I had a sudden image of Nirvana crouched mad max style, digging into a tin of dogmeat....
Crikey, times are tough all over...
By "Kitty", do you mean skunk?
My bf just hung up on me. Damn man! I'm so pizzed I can't sleep. :mad2:
:comfort:
A man's idea of a phone call is like "Gone in Sixty Seconds".
But hanging up on your GF? :headshake: not wise. Most of us have learned that.
He probably just lost the connection. That happens all the time.
If you are a plant you are in trouble. Severe frost expected at 4am. Turn back now!! ;)
Frost! It is still in the 80's here and beauuuuutiful! :p
He probably just lost the connection. That happens all the time.
Nopes, I know for a fact that he got upset at me and hung up. I gave him some time to cool down. Called him back today, and he wouldn't answer my call. So, now, I'm still very pizzzzzzzzzed!:mad2:
Men. As disposable as guinea pigs. And almost as cheap. Cheaper, sometimes.
Then I should dump him, eh? :evil2:
Then I should dump him, eh? :evil2:
Yea. Like a cheap dime store guinea pig.
TheMercenary is upsetting me today.
I have come to expect more from him. Now, I'm disappointed to have to adjust downward my standards for his posts.
TheMercenary, are you simple?
I don't mean that as a compliment, like uncomplicated. Are you dumb? Why do you accept as truth the crap you're reading? And if you don't accept it, why in the world are you repeating it?
I think you're pissed or scared or some other dang thing and you're seriously off your normal game. I've been off my game before, for extended periods of time. I wouldn't wish it on a snake. I don't know what's going on and that's probably because it's none of my flippin business. I'm fine with that. I'm just looking forward to remission or at least a respite from whatever's chappin your ass. Cause you have done much better in the past, a very worthy opponent. I miss that mercy.
The phone calls and messages that are from "recorded people" trying to sway me to vote for their candidate. I am not home during the day and I have had at least 3 calls a day for the last two weeks. Grrr
Hit and run on our vehicle. :mad:
Oh that Sux Case - sorry to hear that. :(
Well, it isn't un-driveable, but it is a pain in the ass...maybe this more belongs in the irritating thread or one of its derivatives.
TheMercenary is upsetting me today.
I have come to expect more from him. Now, I'm disappointed to have to adjust downward my standards for his posts.
TheMercenary, are you simple?
I don't mean that as a compliment, like uncomplicated. Are you dumb? Why do you accept as truth the crap you're reading? And if you don't accept it, why in the world are you repeating it?
I think you're pissed or scared or some other dang thing and you're seriously off your normal game. I've been off my game before, for extended periods of time. I wouldn't wish it on a snake. I don't know what's going on and that's probably because it's none of my flippin business. I'm fine with that. I'm just looking forward to remission or at least a respite from whatever's chappin your ass. Cause you have done much better in the past, a very worthy opponent. I miss that mercy.
Election day is soon. win or lose the stress gets dialed down.
Ok. Recalibrated.
Thanks.
I remember the cellar getting like this four years ago as well. The cellar is home to a disproportionately high number of liberal/left leaning individuals. the conservative/right leaning types tend to get puckered up a bit more as they feel outnumbered and isolated in their views. It will build to a crescendo over the next two weeks and then two days after the election is settled people will start to relax a little.
This year seems to be more relaxed though. I think it is partly due to the fact that most D's and liberals feel pretty confident in Obama's ability to run away with the election whereas no one had any faith in Kerry to pull it out.
Perhaps that's why I feel at home here.
Liberal and left leaning in American terms = centre right in UK terms
Not my politics, but people I can broadly agree with
But the bottom line - and I feel I have to keep stressing this as an outsider - is the intelligence of the posters, their ability to argue, their reason in the face of opposing views IS the Cellar.
Over and over and over again.
The Cellar is a collection of people (hosted and supported by Tony) who have disparate views, politics, religious beliefs, nationalities, experiences and backgrounds, who come together and make the best website ever. End of.
Liberal and left leaning in American terms = centre right in UK terms
If Republican US President Dwight D. Eisenhower were here to run today, he'd probably be considered a pinko commie.
If Republican US President Dwight D. Eisenhower were here to run today, he'd probably be considered a pinko commie fag.
fixed
(Not that there's anything wrong with that.)
Hit and run on our vehicle. :mad:
That sucks Case. It happened to us a few years back, and it took us nearly a year(and some seriously dumb luck- long story) to get our insurance deductible back, since we couldn't prove that the dumb bitch was uninsured.
We don't actually know who it was. I didn't see it happen. Our deductable on this vehicle is low, though, so not so much upsetting as irritating. People who crash without insurance really piss me off. Not that they plan on crashing...but still!! :mad2:
This year seems to be more relaxed though. I think it is partly due to the fact that most D's and liberals feel pretty confident in Obama's ability to run away with the election whereas no one had any faith in Kerry to pull it out.
I think it's because either candidate will be a far better president than the current occupant of the White House. Either way we win. It's just that with Obama, we win more.
Perhaps that's why I feel at home here.
Liberal and left leaning in American terms = centre right in UK terms
Not my politics, but people I can broadly agree with
But the bottom line - and I feel I have to keep stressing this as an outsider - is the intelligence of the posters, their ability to argue, their reason in the face of opposing views IS the Cellar.
Over and over and over again.
The Cellar is a collection of people (hosted and supported by Tony) who have disparate views, politics, religious beliefs, nationalities, experiences and backgrounds, who come together and make the best website ever. End of.
At 7,291 posts and counting, why do you consider yourself an outsider, SG?
At 7,291 posts and counting, why do you consider yourself an outsider, SG?
Because 7,000 of those posts were pictures of her latest hair color?:bolt:
I took that to mean outsider to US politics... was I wrong?
Upsetting me today... ER trip at five in the morning for a 103F fever and a pulse of 120. To be told "We're not SURE what's wrong but we're going to put you on antibiotics to protect your heart til the blood cultures come back..." and treated like a UTI... while I'm developing a chest cold at the same time.
I took that to mean outsider to US politics... was I wrong?
Yes - I was rambling a bit at tht point, but that's what I meant
Because 7,000 of those posts were pictures of her latest hair color?:bolt:
And bollards!
I hate the BMV.
That is all.
And bollards!
Yea! Bollards!
I hate the BMV.
That is all.
Bavarian Motor Verks?
Heehee...not I love me some BMW, I hate the BMV.
Stormy days at sea are followed
By the smoking of a Bollard
Once that lovely smoke is swallowed
So much satisfaction!
Where's that from?
Just looked at our new benefit enrollment package from my husband's employer, and lucky us. We get to pay $94 more a month for the exact same health insurance, starting next month. Hmm, where to cut $94 out of a budget already stretched too thin?
Ugh that's ridiculous binky! Health care has gotten way ridiculous. Ours just changed this past may and its a quagmire, even the insurance company doesn't seem to understand all of the coverage ect.
Don't worry, Barry will fix it for ya.
Just looked at our new benefit enrollment package from my husband's employer, and lucky us. We get to pay $94 more a month for the exact same health insurance, starting next month. Hmm, where to cut $94 out of a budget already stretched too thin?
sell your plasma. and sperm. and eggs. and drug-free pee........
I tried to donate my eggs.
I'm too old.
That's depressing.
Something I am wearing today wasn't dried properly. I think it's my tights (pantyhose). Whatever it is, is giving that horrible musty smell, like a charity shop full of dead people's teeth and glasses.
It's not fair as I'm fresh out of the shower this morning and all my clothes are clean, yet I might as well have just slept in yesterday's and not even bothered cleaning my teeth.
Whatever it is, is giving that horrible musty smell, like a charity shop full of dead people's teeth and glasses.
I hope you are referring to dentures.
England is a very different reality.
England is a very different reality.
and very different teeth :lol:
But with excellent comedy :P
Can I recommend to anybody reading this that, should American TV ever pick up on 'No Heroics', you make time to watch it :)
no new pictures in the tan line thread.;)
I was going to put a picture of my thong tan in there a couple of weeks ago, and then I figured no one would want to see that.
The pending GM/Chrylser merger. It spells disaster for us. I havent lived with this kind of anxiety for decades.
I have had enough of this fecking eczema flareup. I've been playing the denial game and not actually dealing with it properly (ie doctors appointment) for months, trying to keep it at bay with various creams and potions.
My feet and ankles have swollen up. I can't walk properly, had to leave my baseball boot laces undone. Don't know if there's an infection, or water retention, or just that I've damaged the area so much that the soft tissues have swollen up. I'm going for a lie down.
@ Pico, that's horrible. Must be such an insecure feeling.
Yeah, and mostly because everything is so uncertain right now. There is no telling whats going to happen...but if the merger goes through I'm pretty sure the factories here will be axed. This town would then die...losing 6000 jobs is quite a hit. I'm not sure what we will do. I'm currently only working a part-time. I will find out if they have a full-time position available. If not I'm going to have to start looking around.
Dana, get yourself to a doctor! But, hey, I know what its like to procrastinate getting medical attention. I feel like such a jerk once I get it taken care of, but I don't seem to learn either.
Pico, Dana's condition is chronic, so she's probably putting it off because she knows there's no magic wand.
I agree with your advice though.
Off you go girl! And sorry to hear it's so very bad at the moment. Sounds rotten.
I'm still limping and feeling miserable about not being able to enjoy walking in the autumn. But I can tell it is getting better. It's just so slowly, so slowly...
my rental house has developed a slab leak. The hot water pipe that runs beneath the foundation slab (all one piece of concrete) has burst. That means they have to jackhammer up the floor in the center of the house (happens to be under the kitchen cabinets), replace the piping and then pour new concrete, then redo all of the ruined flooring.
Not a good day.:mad:
Burst pipes here are not uncommon (the cold weather can cause them to freeze if you aren't careful). Any idea what the cause was?
my rental house has developed a slab leak. The hot water pipe that runs beneath the foundation slab (all one piece of concrete) has burst. That means they have to jackhammer up the floor in the center of the house (happens to be under the kitchen cabinets), replace the piping and then pour new concrete, then redo all of the ruined flooring.
Not a good day.:mad:
Was that pipe for hot water or for heat?
hot water. of course, now it is heating the floors from beneath so I suppose that's convenient. it is dipping below 80 at night now.
Holy cow. That's a lot of work. I assume you have tenants currently living there. Do you have to relocate the tenants for the duration of work, or can they work around the tenants' schedules?
fortunately, or unfortunately, my tenants recently decided to become lazy assholes and quit paying their rent, so they only had another week to move out anyway. As it stands I told them to vacate as of tonight and I would return their rent prorata. of course, 7 days rent subtracted from the zero they paid me is...
Hang in there, cuz, things will get better. ;)
Sorry, couldn't resist. I hope you all didn't expect me to be different. :)
Urgh, L123 -- We're in the process of buying a house right now, and it's partially on a slab... One more thing to look into.
:worried:
An old apartment, which was actually renovated from the servant's quarters of a giant old huge mansion in town, was on a slab. It was horrible when it broke (the pipes froze and burst.) We were renting, and didn't have to pay, but it's no small job! It took some time and a lot of tearing up to fix it.
95% of the houses here are slabhomes. We don't have crawlspaces and few homes have basements. That makes fixing the problem a pretty big ordeal.
The burst pipe situation doesn't come up here as often as it does in the midwest because we don't get that cold very often but we do range from 35 degrees to 125 degrees every year so the expansion and contraction still causes things to get loose.
That's tough, lookout. Is there any other alternative to digging this up?
Now that you've had a leak in one spot, you can count on others developing later.
You should consider stipulating that the replacement line be made of PEX.
It is much less likely to burst when frozen, and is much more flexible than most other water lines. In fact, if they are ripping up the floor, you could consider having them put in a conduit and run the PEX in that, so if there is ever a problem in the future, they can just pull new PEX through the conduit without tearing anything up.
That sounds like a good approach, glatt.
I'll have to look into it. or I might just burn the house down and be done with it.
Be sure to collect the insurance money.
:tinfoil:
Who me? Nah, but now that I think about it I have been storing all my diamonds, gold, and other valuables there...
I'll phone the sheriff with an anonymous tip that you have a body buried under the floor. Then they'll come dig it up for free.
This would be fine, except that they might find the bodies that you really do have buried under the floor.
I might just burn the house down and be done with it.
Something like
this?
That's a big problem with the burst pipe. After reading the comments it seems like it's common practice to put pipes under the slab. That doesn't happen too much over here though. Mostly the pipes are on the exterior of the house running around the base of the walls etc or under garden beds so they're accessable (in case they burst).
Is it still common practice to put pipes under the slab over there or is it mainly in older constructions?
around here exposed piping wouldn't last long. theft, vandalism, or just plain old sun exposure would destroy it pretty quickly. Most importantly, it would be unsightly.;)
Concrete eats copper, aluminum, galvanized steel, and even some plastics. :(
around here exposed piping wouldn't last long. theft, vandalism, or just plain old sun exposure would destroy it pretty quickly. Most importantly, it would be unsightly.;)
We have pretty harsh weather here which doesn't seem to destroy domestic plumbing. I've never heard of anyone having their pipes stolen from their house other than those under construction, and even then it's more often tools left onsite. As far as unsightly goes, I suppose it's what you're used to, but I think there are some very beautiful homes in Australia and they all have pipes exposed externally.
I believe you, just because all the photos I've seen from friends & family in Aus have looked great. But for the record, could you post an example?
As far as unsightly goes, I suppose it's what you're used to, but I think there are some very beautiful homes in Australia and they all have pipes exposed externally.
It's absolutely what you are used to. In much of the U.S., we have utility poles with wires strung from them. They are just about the most ugly thing you have ever seen, and they are virtually everywhere in some regions. But the locals don't even see them any more.
You don't notice the wires until you try to take a picture without wires in it. In some areas it's almost impossible.
Older homes in Britain have exposed pipes, I think because they built with stone instead of wood.
I've got the blues.
As I end this first week at my new job, I'm finding myself to be very out of sorts. This training has been hard, not because I don't understand the work but because I am trying to merge what I do know with their way of doing things, not go out on a limb yet on changes, not assume too much, and trying to understand the differences. (I know that was bad sentence structure but I'm in a hurry.)
I knew going into this that I was taking a "lesser" job for more pay, but I guess I kind of miss my stature in my old company, for what it was worth.
It's just hard being the new guy. Everyone is very nice...it's just different, and for some reason I have felt near tears all day (just on the inside, I don't think it shows.)
I'm probably just tired, and stressed because it is all new and a bit scary. I like it here and don't regret the move, but I'm just feeling some aftershock. I feel lonely, which is stupid...I am meeting my best ex cow orker after work. I feel different here in the Cellar even...like I don't belong.
I don't know. :sniff:
Thanks for the ears. :o
Awwwww...Shawnee, I've been there. Adjusting to a new job can be a very uncomfortable experience. Its temporary (and I know you know that), but still not fun to go through.
Shawnee, you belong here in the Cellar! Don't even think that.
The transition to a new job will be challenging at times, but that cool. It's what makes it refreshing. Soon you will find your place and how you fit in, and you can get comfortable there too. The cream rises to the top, and you will too.
Sounds like self imposed isolation. It's dumb when I do that....but I do it. I feel cut off from everything and everyone. And I'm not. It's just a feeling.
The real question is:
Aren't you going to look silly when I tickle you? :) heh.
Oh I'm going to look silly, like an old perverted lesbo? heh heh. It'll be worth it. Fuck it.
Consider yourself virtually tickled.
Shawnee, perhaps you have been taken over by the pods.
Oh wait, maybe you have been assimilated. Run Shawnee!!
I'm guessing you're just stressed. Wait for everything to mellow out and you'll be ok.
After a bit, they'll recognize the potential in you and you'll have the stature and recognition you deserve.
Starting somewhere new is hard. And feeling out of sorts at work will of course have a knock on effect in the rest of your life. I once had a job where I cried every day in the toilets for the first week and was unhappy for the first couple of months. I had nowhere else to go though and had to stick it out. I never actually forgot how miserable I was when I started, but I did look back and wonder what the heck was so bad. By the time I left I loved the place so much - I only went because there was no room to expand int he role and I was offered much better opportunities elsewhere.
I'm sure your period of adjustment will be nowhere near as long. But do give yourself permission to grieve your old job.
And we're here for you even if you're not feeling it at the moment.
Thanks guys. YOu made me laugh, smile, and feel better!
I just had a meeting with my boss too. I told her I was adjusting, but reiterated how great the people have been.
But SG is right, I am grieving my old job...though I didn't think I would, and it's very normal to do that. There's a reason job change is on the list of identified major life stressors.
:)
95% of the houses here are slabhomes. We don't have crawlspaces and few homes have basements. That makes fixing the problem a pretty big ordeal.
The burst pipe situation doesn't come up here as often as it does in the midwest because we don't get that cold very often but we do range from 35 degrees to 125 degrees every year so the expansion and contraction still causes things to get loose.
Question: was it
polybutylene piping? Turns out there was an epidemic of poly-built houses in the sunbelt (and in MD, for some reason) in the 70s and 80s. Many of them have had to be completely re-plumbed.
We are trying to determine if the house we have a bid on still has poly in it.
:worried:
Sooo, you know how I'm dealing with broken pipes and not overly thrilled about it? OK, so today I'm waiting for a call from a contractor and the call doesn't come and it doesn't come and then finally I get pissed off enough to call them and bitch because I've taken another day out of the office for this... only to find my cell has been shut off. actually all four of them have been. (my personal and work, and Mrs L's personal and work) I call Sprint to find I have an outstanding $1800 phone bill because my automatic payment was rejected. uh, WTF?!?! rejected??? uh, WTF?!?! $1800???
Yeah, it turns out that when I transferred Mr's L's two phones over to my business plan a couple months ago they forgot to put in my unlimited text messages and they magically reduced my minutes. An hour later they've opened the investigation but I need phones working so I had to pay the effing bill and it'll get credited back.
I hate you and your law, Mr Murphy.
Where is your house LO. more than half the homes in the south are on slabs. One thing they have done in the last 10 years or so is to pour all the slabs with fiber reinforced concrete. All the plumbing in them is PVC of some kind. But of course we don't have hard freezes here but a week out of a year.
Bloody Diz.
Don't try to practice your Halloween make-up with a Singapura in the room.
In fact don't try to do anything, ever, with a Singapura in the house.
I'm used to brush swiping, to pats on the arm when I'm doing liquid eyeliner, even to him trying to bat the mascara wand. What I am not used to is using cosmetic glitter. Oh you know the stuff, the really, really fine stuff. That comes in tiny pots because a little goes such a loooooong way. That transfers at the slightesr touch. You don't? Come round to my place, you'll know it intimately very soon.
I didn't take enough care where I put the lid. I had a scattering of glitter in it, rather than risk using the open pot (which was sensibly out of reach). Diz made a play for it and I wasn't quick enough. There's a dusting of red glitter on the bedclothes, the bottom sheet, me, my body, and all over Diz. I'll be finding it for weeks (although thankfully tomorrow was my day to change the sheets anyway). I could have strangled him.
We've made up now, but goodness knows what I'll do when I'm really getting ready. A couple more practices needed just so it doesn't stress me out if he intervenes again. Looks okay actually. I only did it on one eye and without foundation, but I took some pics. Just realised I left my USB cable at work though. Grrrr. Pics when I get the chance.
Shawnee - hang in there. I'm feeling a bit like a spare part at my new job as the woman I'm replacing is still there and the job is very bitty. She has assured me that she's going to draw up a comprehensive list of what her job entails, but I've not got any sense of what I should be doing when yet, and I'm not sure she's got the time to do it before she leaves next week. But it's early days, dearie, early days.
What's upsetting me today?
Not grumpy tired children who stayed up too late last night.
Not the fact that my tree ferns don't seem to be doing well.
Not the fact that I wanted to go for a swim today but it's low tide during the day.
Actually, nothing is upsetting me today. :)
This one's for Shawnee
:comfort: You'll be right. Think positive. Check your posture occasionally at work. Make sure you keep your physical posture good. A lot can flow from that, for me at least.
This is for Lookout
:comfort:
That does kinda suck. (a) 1800 goddam dollars???!!!! (b) they sent no warning or anything before cutting you off???!!! (c) now is NOT a good time for extra aggravation!! (d) how do they always manage to screw up in their favour every time they do anything??? HMMMM?????
I should stop ranting vicariously.
Say, aren't you two related?
This is for Sundae.
:lol2:
Sorry, but I thought that was funny. I hope you will too in a few days.
Upsetting? No, way beyond that.... but we don't need yet another thread of this genre, so this will do....for my rant.....
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggghhhh.
my kids are swimmers. I am involved with the running of their team. Their usual pool s under construction. We have an alternative -5 miles further down the road. It's free because when their pool was under construction, we housed them whithout cost (except they just billed us, but that's a different rant0.
Anyway, their heater broke. so the pool was closed for a bit. Then they decided that rather than fixit asap, they'd fight the manufacturers.... so we had to swim at 70degrees or not at all (that's really effing cold) so we've been swimming in the cold. finally it's fixed (we hear) but we can't get in the pool topractice becaus all the teams swimming there are scheduling their meets that were cancelled due to the cold or the gas leak in the area a few weeks ago....
So I run my ass off -email, telephone and literally to get another pool for us to practice in tonight and tomorrow. it ain't cheap and it's tiny and we had to jump through all sorts of paperwork hoops to get it, I have to rope the prez of the club in to help me (I'm the treasurer). We do it. we get the insurance, the payment, the certifications and the booking in line and turm up tonight to find the athletic director of the school (middle school) cancelling our practice because their are medicals for sports teams tonight and they want to use the locker rooms for blood pressure measurements and they need quiet for that.
:eek:
Our prez, who is an RN goes town with them about that, they agree we can still use pool but our swimmers may not walk through the halls and must change in the bathrooms.
but when i arrive, there are notices posted on all doors cancelling our practice tonight and tomorrow... apparently she (the athletic director) decided that -after our 4-8 yo beginners had swum- our swimmers were too disruptive to her potential medicals (did I say potentiel there? read on) that we couldn't use the pool at all, so she posted two notices on each door, one cancelling practice for tonight and one for tomorrow.
well hello, you can't actually cancel our practice, we're booked and we paid for it and you're not..... and tomorrow? there aren't even medicals tomorrow..... she said "ooops! *giggle* that was an accident!" She apparently meant it to be today's date... but why would you need two notices side by side in each location cancelling the same practice?
just to add the cherry to the cake, hardly anyone showed up for the medicals and they did not use the locker rooms at all.
I feel like I'm in a super-slow game of chicken and it's driving me insane and I just want it to stop.
April left her job last month...unfortunately, I cannot go into the specifics of the situation, as there may be litigation on the horizon due to what led to her departure. In short, she did nothing wrong. We originally made the decision to move in with her mom next month, as our lease is up, and moving in with her would prevent us from blowing through our savings and/or racking up debt.
Then two weeks ago, she started an interview process with Washington University, St. Louis' most prestigious college. She was one of 34 candidates for this job...by last Thursday, she was one of 2. They want to get someone in to do this job ASAP, so a decision was to be made by yesterday.
No call yesterday...but they lagged on the second interview process as well.
If April gets this job, it is a nice pay increase over her last job and would allow us to stay in our apartment--something that we want, her mom wants and our landlord wants. Talk about a beast...our landlord offered to defer our rent if we signed a new lease.
Anyway, we just want an obvious sign--a phone call, an e-mail, a letter. Something tangible that says, "You're our new director" or "Sorry, we've gone in a different direction." If she doesn't hear anything by the end of today, she's going to call tomorrow to find out the status of the position.
I just want to know so that we can move on with our life. April is already beating herself up because she feels like she's fucked our life up due to quitting her job. I've tried to tell her that that's just not true--you should have seen her just before she left her job...what a mess that was. If we have to move in with her mom for 6 months to a year, I can deal with that. Her mom is the one that offered in the first place. She drives me nuts sometimes, but she's cool...cooler than my own mom.
So in short, if you all could pray/chant/will a sign to us today, that would be splendiferous. Thank you.
One of our artists has just told me that HM turned up here last night and asked if we wanted to adopt Hely as she obviously prefers it here to there.
I'm still trying to put my finger on exactly why that's upset me - but it has. I feel really sad about it, and a little angry, although I suspect I am being unfair.
I think it's because she's such a lovely cat and I feel as if she's been rejected. I think also it's because I feel he never made an effort with her when I lived there, and I suspect he didn't after I left, although of course I can't be sure of that. I think also it's because it shows a lack of care - he spoke to an artist who is rarely here, and although he doesn't know that, apparently he didn't even ask. The artists who spoke to him was really puzzled as to why this random man had turned up and was trying to get rid of his cat.
Anyway, I should just take a deep breath and clear the butterflies. This does not have to be a confrontation. I'll get Deb to go and speak to him - there'll be no personal aspect to it then. She's spoken before about adopting Hely formally. All it would take would be a litter tray in here, so that she didn't have to be kicked out overnight. And I'd have to make sure I got some dried food in to supplement her diet and put some water down too.
After all, I already groom her, give her flea treatments and check her health. And if she'd ever gone missing or appeared i'll I'd have taken responsibility for that too. Her collar is round here somewhere - I'll put it back on her so people know she's not a stray. I might even get a tag for it, so it's all official.
Thank you, I'm feeling a bit better now.
UPDATE - I'm getting two different stories. Ben and Anya say Steve came looking for her and Ben explained that hs ekept getting locked in, So Steve said he would come by every evening to pick her up and take her home. He did so, but when Ben went into the yard later she was there and followed him back in. I have a feeling that he spoke to Sid after this, but the only way I'll know is if he turns up tonight. I'm going to leave on time. I'm such a coward but I don't want to see him.
For the record I did leave him a card when I moved the last of my stuff out, to thank him for everything he's done. And yet since I've moved I've become really wary of seeing him, as if I've done something really awful to him. I don't know why.
You feel that way because a friendship became rocky and when you left it was not on good terms. And because you know, from your last visit to the house, that he is on a massive downswing and not actually taking care of himself.
This isn't your fault honey. The only blame you could possibly take on is your share of the anger/frustration that characterised your last few weeks there and that might be where the residual guilt is coming from. That and the fact that when you hit rock bottom he helped you out, yet now he's at rock bottom, you aren't in a position to - and the nature of the friendship has changed such that - you cannot do the same for him: so now you are feeling (correct me if I am wrong) a little like you've abandoned him to his fate?
Ain't your fault hon. Not his either. It's just one of those things. Friends living with friends is about as fraught a situation as exists on this planet :P I've lived with friends, it's never worked. Living two doors from my bro and sharing a yard with his family for 8 years was fraught enough lol (though that had rather more to do with my partner and his partner not really liking each other).
The thing with Hely sounds to me like he might actually be feeling a little hurt that the cat doesn't want to stay with him. Taking it personally that she prefers to hang out at your workplace? I don't know.
Hope it works out in the end, babe, and hopefully you can rescue the friendship at some point as well. When the dust settles and time passes.
I think you might be right. Which was why I dreamed about him and his new housemate the other night. I am actually a bit worried about him and the fact that I've let him down quite horribly.
You haven't let him down.
The two of you were not temperamentally suited to house sharing.
I had an HM situation like that. We still don't speak. I did make an effort to be cordial after I left, but my HM was jealous of my new place after she was invited over. So she couldn't keep her trap shut about how I managed to pull it off, after the short period of time she gave me to move out. Part of her wanted to see me couch surf. That did not happen, and the new place ended up being small but very cool. I quit talking to her after years of friendship because she made me uncomfortable after I saw her true colors, and her character was not that, of a friend. Jealous, spiteful, really attention mongering, and maybe she carried all this the whole time. Maybe she was helping me so she could tell others how good she was for it, and silently enjoyed my temporary imbalance. In any case, we never made amends though I made several attempts. Once I gave her some money because she seemed like she needed it. She took it, but seemed bent about that too. In retrospect, I believe she never was a friend and I might have been a little naive about the nature of our relations. Not that that would have changed anything. When I moved in with her, I needed to. Her attitude showing, at that point, wouldn't have changed anything about my need for shelter. I did what I had to do and repayed some of it. I feel ok about it. But if she is still anything like she used to be, she feels worse because she always did. And most of it has very little to do with me. I was briefly there for the show.
She did mention that she quit feeding the kitty that used to come over every day. As if it were my kitty and she was going to punish it. I doubt your ex HM is anything like mine, Sundae. But we never should have talked or made friends in the first place. If I had known she was oil and I was water from the first time we met, it might be different. I regret mostly, that I wasn't a better person at the time, and let myself go deeper into financial ruin. It's too bad there was someone there to watch it, and love it.
We will never make amends. And I do not mind. My long-winded point? These things take time, after the fact, to get a handle sometimes. Don't feel weird, it might be someone else trying to make you feel that way out of some strange satisfaction, wait and see.
Kind of like what Dana said. We were never suited to being friends, muchless any type of living arrangement.....She's just low and mean. God was she mean. It's taken me a long time to say that.
I am unhappy because I am home sick again today...a week after being home sick. TF's respiratory illness has now spread through our entire household, in fact, proving that the surest vector for disease is your own extended family.
It's so, so cold, and so, so dry. Because I have eczema and sensitive, dry skin, I feel like my entire surface area is in pain. Yuck.
Well, we lost the house. We made an offer of $X95k, and instead of coming back with $(X+1)10K or somesuch, they took it off the market. What the hell? So, we're stuck in apartment hell till past the holidays, at best.
:confused::mecry:
It's so, so cold, and so, so dry. Because I have eczema and sensitive, dry skin, I feel like my entire surface area is in pain. Yuck.
I hear ya honey. Eczema is a funny thing. On the one hand it's 'a rash', on the other hand it's our biggest organ, and when that organ isn't working properly, it makes you feel like shit. Do you have stuff to keep it under control? Don't do what I did recently and let it all get out of control and not go to the doctors...
Which reminds me: update on my gripe from other day -
My feet and ankles are normal sized again! yey! I slept like a log last night. I am getting better by the day. The anti-biotics, water tablets and sedatives between them are making me feel a bit rank, but I can live with the nausea for a week I'm sure.
Yey. Feeling myself again. I even found myself automatically answering the phone the last couple of days, instead of letting the ans phone get it.
Well, we lost the house. We made an offer of $X95k, and instead of coming back with $(X+1)10K or somesuch, they took it off the market. What the hell? So, we're stuck in apartment hell till past the holidays, at best.
:confused::mecry:
Oh crap. Sorry to hear that Pie. That's some shitty timing.
Oh and Els, hope you're feelin better mate *hugs*
Well, unless it was listed at like $(X+3)95k or something, where your offer just totally crushed all their hopes and dreams, I'd guess that taking it off the market had nothing to do with your offer, Pie. Maybe somebody lost a job, or found a job, or one of the kids suddenly has to move back home...
But anyway, why do you think you won't find another suitable place for over 2 months? Around here you can't throw a dead cat without hitting a house for sale... and people needing to sell during the holidays are usually of the more-motivated variety too.
Well, we lost the house. We made an offer of $X95k, and instead of coming back with $(X+1)10K or somesuch, they took it off the market. What the hell? So, we're stuck in apartment hell till past the holidays, at best.
:confused::mecry:
crazy. You would think that if they were serious about selling, they would negotiate a little. Especially if they knew they had a serious offer.
It was listed at $(X+1)30k. We did shave $35k off their asking price, but they hadn't had a price reduction since July. And the market's been pretty shitty recently.
Oddly enough, there isn't much on the market that's any good. Most people seem to be waiting it out till spring for the new listings; what's out here is mostly left-overs that didn't sell for specific reason.
I'll now stop my whining. There's not much wrong with my life that a good, swift kick in the pants wouldn't cure.
It's quite possible that your offer would take them into short sale territory. A) They aren't mentally prepared for that, B) They are but haven't done the legwork to prepare for a shortsale, which takes 90-180 days.
Yabbut, wouldn't they (sanely) make a counter-offer that puts them in the black? Who walks away from a cash offer without even negotiating??
I don't know what is happening there, just offering a possibility. To start a shortsale process they have to have an offer of some sort. The person who actually makes that initial offer is rarely the one who buys the house later because the process is so long. They may be taking the offer to the bank saying, "see this is what we can sell it for" and then their negotiations begin.
Just a possibility. of course, they could just be stupid, too.
Sorry about the house, Pie.
Dana, thankfully my eczema isn't that bad and is limited mostly to my hands. Every now and again I get a bad breakout and put off going to the dermatologist, but I think I'll have to follow your example and go in to get some medication or else I won't make it through the winter. Glad to hear you're feeling better!
Yeah, you don't often know what people are doing behind their back as they represent something else to you. Years ago, I was trying to rent an awesome house with a bunch of guys. It was going to be a great place for a bunch of single guys right out of college to live. Almost a mansion. Not cheap, but we could swing it. The agent was all excited with our application and that we all had good credit, jobs and could pay the rent, and the day after we signed the application, they decided not to rent the house but to sell it instead.
I think they were using us as some sort of bargaining chip to get a reluctant buyer to commit.
The breast exam did not go well. At all. Plbbbt. In fact, it went worse than I thought possible.
It's probably nothing - ya know just like monsters kid with the murmor... just cautious butt-covering. Hang tight.
It's just rich that someone scared the hell out of me on Halloween. Awesome. That's the spirit! Quite! lol! JFC.
Bump. Cic, what's going on?
Layoffs yesterday. Some good people gone.
What's the rest of the story, Cic?
CICERO!! Story, PLEASE!!! lol
Oh I have to get off my ass to get this breast ex-rayed and there was a blood test done to see what is wrong with my glands, if there is something wrong with my glands. There is a minute chance that I have a tumor in my head, but I don't think I do. That has to be ruled out for the time being, and I have to go see what's up with the lump in my breast. Plbbbt.
Why can't they just run me through a machine, or check all of it out at once, like on star trek with that wand? I don't like all of this appointment here, appointment there stuff. And I had to pay for blood work out of pocket yesterday, to check on a brain tumor I don't have....
Now I know I have a little cyst in my breast. I don't think it's a big deal, but they are talking crazy. And I know after all of this testing and money it's taking, I'll be fine and have a clean bill of health. This is a reminder that I need to actually call and make my x-ray appointments...*sigh*
I call bullshit.
This is dumb.....I just want them to extract the little cyst with a needle and get it over with. This is wasting my time.
Yuck. And further, ick. I hate doctors, for just that reason: piecemeal examinations. For crying out loud, just get it all done in one fell swoop, eh?
Well, however you need to get it done, get it done so WE can stop worrying, k?
:)
What's upsetting me today...
...is that the office I work in will be closed as of 02JAN09.
I've been too long out of the job search mode.
I have a 3yr-old daughter.
We just refinanced our house.
I'm trying to stay positive.
Shit, ferret, that's some bloody awful timing *frowns* sorry to hear it.
Good that you're trying to stay positive. I know you've been out of job search mode a long time, but trust me it's like riding a bike; you'll be running off CVs and wowing interviewers before you know it. [*]
Good luck with it, and anytime you need to vent, you know where we are *smiles*
[*eta] Britspeak to Merkin translation: 'running off CVs' = 'printing out/emailing resumes'
Well, however you need to get it done, get it done so WE can stop worrying, k?
:)
You're sweet Shawnee, it did have me all shook up for a couple of hours when they told me what the tests were for. My knees were like jelly, knocked a little, and I was a little shaky,then I realized that I do not have a brain tumor and probably don't have any cancer at all. So I'm over it. Now they (the medics)need to get over it and we will all be happy.
Even my husband is skeptical, he's like..."yea, cicero, there's nothing wrong with you". And I'm like. "hmmm, yea, good point!" Thanks.
They are testing to make sure I don't have something, rather than to make sure I do. Big difference there.
Of course, my body did not understand the logic at first, and did what it wanted to do. My body said: Uhhh what? *shake and disassociate*
Ok so they tapped into my fear, and my imaginings were trumped by the reality. It will be over soon, and my imagination can go back to normal, and so can theirs. My husband thinks it's all pretty stupid, and he's right. This is dumb.
It's stupid, but it is necessary.
Like when I had to have my liver tested. There were absolutely no signs that there was a problem, it was "just in case" but it scared the bejesus out of me til the results came through (I'm with LJ on being all bejesusless now).
You win either way. You're either as fit as a butcher's dog and get to sneer and tut and say, "Well I knew that anyway!" And even if a worst case scenario you will have identified something and be able to take some action.
ETA - just finished typing and only then appreciated the financial aspect, sorry. Still, like having a full survey on a house you don't end up buying, it's surely better to spend some money now just to be certain.
Ferret I'm sorry to hear about your job. On the plus side, at least you have some notice and can start planning. My thoughts are with you.
Oh hey Cic, glad you've got a handle on it *smiles* and Sundae's right, better to spend some money now to be certain.
holy crap---is everybody getting sick or what? keep us informed, cic!
Sorry to hear it, ferret. Best wishes on pulling a decent plan together.
Ditto what everyone else said, Cicero. I hope you're right.
holy crap---is everybody getting sick or what? keep us informed, cic!
I noticed some black mold growing over there behind the furnace. Maybe we need to get this Cellar cleaned up.
Hmmph. Is the birthday list broken? Hmmph. :(
But I really appreciate y'all getting me a new president for my birthday. ;)
It's my dad's birthday too. Happy birthday dad!
It's your birthday, Shawnee? well, hell, woman!
:band: :shred:
Happy Birthday!!!!!
Heeeheee...shameless plug for me.
Hey, I'm a big believer in shameless plugs! they get the job done!
Happy 29th BD Shawnee (beggar).
Big fat happy wishes flying your way Shawneebaby!
Shit, ferret, that's some bloody awful timing *frowns* sorry to hear it.
Good that you're trying to stay positive. I know you've been out of job search mode a long time, but trust me it's like riding a bike; you'll be running off CVs and wowing interviewers before you know it. [*]
Good luck with it, and anytime you need to vent, you know where we are *smiles*
[*eta] Britspeak to Merkin translation: 'running off CVs' = 'printing out/emailing resumes'
Sorry to hear it, ferret. Best wishes on pulling a decent plan together.
Thank you both.
I know it's gonna be a BIG change in my life. But I'm looking at it from the perspective of "it's time to find somethign you'll enjoy doing."
Mc Cain LOST!!!:mecry: :ipray: :cry: :cry: :cry:
ferret: good attitude. The world is your oyster (never been quite sure why you would want to live in an oyster, but it's my saying du jour.)
:)
^
|
What Shawnee said :)
@ fargon, he made a dignified end to his campaign.
^
|
What Shawnee said :)
@ fargon, he made a dignified end to his campaign.
I know he did. Hopefully Obama will be a good president and not make things worse. There is no telling what congress might try to do.
What scares me the most is the people he hangs out with. The only thing wrong with George jr. is the people he surrounded himself with.
I had a bad headache last night, the remains of which are still floating around in my head...brought on by finding out Dazza is going to be away for three more weeks come Friday, on top of my ex telling me he's been offered a great job in Darwin (thousands of miles away) but he has to be there on Monday to start...which means I'm trying to make alternative arrangements for the kids and getting to school for the last month of the school year.
Yes, it's a bit of a pain, but I think I've managed to sort the kids out. About Dazza, I'm still upset. I think I just feel a bit more emotional than usual but it's making me cry just thinking about it...which hurts my head.
AAAAH! Happy Birthday funny giiirl! And many more to come for ya!!!!
Partay!!! Woo-hooo!!!
:jig: :juggle: :rotflol: :girlband: :bass: :birthday: :beer: :madmoon: :lol2:
Thanks Cic. Award for best story-telling via smilies! :)
I am HIGHLY upset. HM's dog Suli decided to run away last night. I know, a lot of dogs do this... but Suli is a twenty pound terrier who thinks she's a hundred pound wolfhound. She has a problem with picking fights with coyotes and other dogs much bigger than her. The last time she disappeared, HM found her lying in a ditch beside the road, torn all to hell from tangling with some form of sharp-clawed wildlife. Also bear in mind that our closest neighbors are over a mile away, so it's not like I can walk around town knocking on doors and asking if anyone's seen her. I'm worried sick about her, the other dogs are moping around the house missing her, and HM's in quite the tizzy with worry himself. Suli DOES have her collar on, fortunately, and her tags with HM's phone number on it... so that's a point in our favor. Lil Trea, Paks (HM's other dog), and Cassia (my dog) are going to be saddling up here in a little bit to go look for her. I just really really REALLY hope and pray she's off chasing rabbits somewhere and hasn't gotten coyoted again.
This kind of stuff makes me totally crazy:
(CNN) — A 13-year-old girl accused of adultery was stoned to death last month in a soccer stadium in Somalia, witnesses told CNN.
The killing occurred October 27 after the girl, Aisha Ibrahim Duhulow, told officials of al-Shabab, a radical Islamic group that controls the port city of Kismayo 500 km (300 miles) south of Mogadishu, that she had been raped by three men, said Amnesty International, citing sources.
The human rights organization said 50 men participated in stoning the girl, who had been placed in a hole in the ground, as about 1,000 people watched.
“It was absolutely appalling to be there, the girl was screaming and begging for mercy as she was being dragged to her killing hole,” said a Kismayo resident who did not want to be identified out of fear for his safety.
None of the men accused of rape were arrested, Amnesty International said.
Fuck. You know I'm unstable. Stop that shit.
*Shakes head* poor kid. She must have been fucking terrified to the end.
There are times, I find myself very angry at the world. Angry at the cold war still being fought across gender lines. Those men are so blinded by their own importance in God's scheme, by their own fear of femininity, by their own personal misogyny. Damn them.
That's the most fucked up thing I've come across in quite a long time.
Maybe watching this will make you feel a bit better.
http://au.youtube.com/watch?v=7fNFLxzSWCgThanks Zen, that does help.
I love how she pulls him back in to kick his ass some more. Go girlfriend!
I had my interview for child mentoring today.
I don't think it went all that well. The longest time spent on any particular aspect was on my depression.
I completely understand it, but obviously it's not my best selling point.
Also, I worry that I came across as being too easily upset by other people's emotions. I mean I am, I know it, but I can deal with it. I've stuck out jobs where I thought I was hated by my colleagues. Mostly turned out to be paranoia (there was some mild dislike) but the fact is I toughed it out and it got better. I didn't want to dwell on it because I know they were worried that it might trigger depression in me which of course would mean no-one would benefit.
It was over 2 hours long, and at the end of it I fely really self-centred - talking about me, me, me. Obviously that was the whole point of the interview, but it does add to my perception that I didn't come across well.
Ah well, I must be stoic and accept that if I don't get through then it's for the best. I'll know early next week.
Sorry, SG. It's painful to think that others may deem us "unfit" or not good enough for something we want to do - especially when it's something done out of kindness.
I bet you'd be awesome at it, too.
If you don't get it, maybe there are alternatives.
Another thing to consider is that often children in need of mentoring will only respond to someone who has "been through it" like they have. Ex-junkies keeping kids off drugs, and all that. It may even turn out that conquering depression is actually a selling point in your favor.
I'm with Clod here, just because they were looking at that part of your history doesn't mean to say they're being critical - more like looking at how you cope with it? good luck SG - fingers crossed for you up here!
Thanks for the vote of confidence, but it's honestly the way I think it went. I know I'm being pessimistic, but I am trying to protect myself from hurt to an extent. Even if I get through this, there's another session in my home to assess me, although that's more about matching me with a child.
There's actually a waiting list of kids. I think that's what will sting the most.
What's next? Well, I said I'd volunteer at the local cat home, but I might look for volunteer work with childen after all. I don't have a biological clock, but I have been thinking about kids for a couple of years now - I'd like to do what I can.
SG, I think you'd do well in the cat house.
SG...its HARD to talk to others about depression...its seems like such a personal fault. So Im sure what your feeling is being colored by that, but how did you really characterize it? Its sounds like you might have used it as an example of how you have coped with it successfully. This could be a good thing. Just going off of how you are here on the cellar, I'd be willing to bet you gave it a very adult perspective.
Dont write this off just yet.
I don't see what's so horrible about depression anyway, why there's such a stigma. It's not as though it's contagious. It's not as though you're schizophrenic, hearing voices, bipolar, or otherwise functionally compromised due to a mental illness. I'd venture to say that most people have suffered at least mild depression at some time in their lives, and many just never found the guts to do anything about it for fear of being "labeled." Count me in that list. I'm still a little nervous that I'll someday pay for asking my doctor for some depression meds last year after my mom died, or for the week I spent in the "hospital" when I was 20. Is there a statute of limitations on nervous breakdowns? (sigh)
Count me in that list. I'm still a little nervous that I'll someday pay for asking my doctor for some depression meds last year after my mom died, or for the week I spent in the "hospital" when I was 20. Is there a statute of limitations on nervous breakdowns? (sigh)
Fucking hope not lol.
The problem with depressed people is that they don't laugh at my jokes.
[COLOR=LightBlue]I think everyone is depressed.[/COLOR]
I think they're approach is that someone who is not 100% emotionally stable may have trouble dealing with the issues that these children have. And also that they might not be able to cope with an angry and frustrated cgild, who may not be able to show gratitude, trust or even friendship.
This is what worries me, because I am actually very patient with people (I know I show my irritable side here, but trust me). In fact HM used to think I was really intolerant until he met my friend Teri - who is a really lovely woman, but can be a bit much sometimes.
I don't think they have any prejudice against people with previous problems, all they are trying to do is get the best possible outcomefor kids who come from homes where their sole parent might have problems with drugs, drink, have been abused themselves or be a potential abuser. Most of these children already have a social worker, they are looking for an adult friend simply to be a constant and reliable presence.
I didn't tell them I'd had alcohol counselling. Which is very dishonest of me. But I figured it was one step too far. I know I can trust myself. I could even when I was drinking regularly.
SG, I would trust you with my daughter. Granted, she doesn't have the issues that the kids you want to work with have, but the fact remains. She's a child, she's a very young child, and I would trust her to you.
I know I'd trust my nieces with you Sundae.
Not really upsetting, but as of tomorrow I am officially unemployed.
I've come to a parting of the ways with EEA.
I'm not going to go into it all here, suffice to say we had a difference of opinion and I felt it was best all round to resign. Since I reached that decision they have behaved impeccably, I admit.
I'm not quite sure what to do with myself now. I'm probably going home this weekend to have a serious talk with my parents. I'm not in the most stable of positions right now, as I based my ability to pay the rent on my (good) salary. I'd be very lucky to find something that paid the same in the next month, especially without a good reference.
Well I'll see what Mum & Dad say. I hope they'll accept me back for a couple of months and let me find my feet. Funny how even 6 months ago the idea horrified me, but now I am seriously hoping they'll consider it. I'm beginning to get tired of the rollercoaster I'm afraid.
Anyway, I'm not too down, oddly enough. I've not cried, got drunk or gone into the usual freefall panic mode. It's just one of those things and one way or another I'll get through it.
Funny the difference a week makes.
You're getting stronger all the time, and you'll be OK.
Sorry things are rough, Sundae. :(
Is this kinda... sudden, SG?
I hope things smooth out soon. Good for you for staying out of the panic spiral.
wow. and you just got settled in and all. Sorry to hear you are struggling so.
I hope you know that the outpouring of concern you get here is because you are a wonderful human being. I'm sending warm thoughts, girl.
Sundae, sometimes going back to base camp is a really good move. I've lived back with my mum a couple of times over the years, for 2 years on one occasion (after me and J split). Family = emotional sustenance.
Sorry to hear things haven't worked out with the job and room, but I know you'll be back on your feet in no time. In the meantime though, it's ok to take a break from stuff that's emotionally and psychically draining. You've been on the merry go round for a while now and you've coped brilliantly with some really difficult circumstances.
If you need a friendly ear you know where I am honey, though my mobile phone is lost, so you'd have to phone my landline. PM me if you want to chat without talking :P
Dani
Thanks - everyone.
Dana I'll probably call you in the next week.
But rest assured, I am very much in an onwards and upwards mode (til I speak to Mum & Dad!) and am not hating myself and wanting to die this time.
BTW - I've got Skype on my laptop, so anyone else who has it and wants a chat (before 21.00 GMT) I'd love to hear from you.
Sundae, you are wonder woman! I think family is just the ticket right now. Karma owes you a debt. Hang on!
:comfort:
Well, as if dealing with Mick and my child going to Hawaii for a long period of time and a new job and the ex and everything attendant to that wasn't enough, further excrement hath hit air conditioning.
Allow me to explain. No, that will take to long. Let me sum up.
The ex, who shall heretofore be referred to as "B", has a sister. Let's call her "S". S is 16 years old and a bit sheltered. B has confided in her EVERYTHING about our marital split... except for the parts that make him look bad. In other words, S knows I took the baby and left, and that B is very broken up about the fact that his daughter is so far away, yadda yadda yadda. So S leaves me a comment on Myspace about how I've ruined B's life, how she'll never see her niece again, and so on. So I comment back and politely remind her that there's two sides to every story, and perhaps she should hear both of them this time before jumping to conclusions. The reply I get is basically "You're lying, I don't want to hear it, my brother is a great guy and he could never do anything to you that would justify you treating him this way." Again, I responded as politely as I could, while gritting my teeth in frustration, that she really doesn't understand the issues involved here, and needs to either hear both sides of the story, or back off. The response I get? "You have no idea how much B tells me, I know everything that happened, I will never forgive you even if he does, and you better hope you never come into my presence again because if you do I don't know if I can control my temper." That was the essence of it... it was a lot wordier than that, but I really don't see the need to repeat the whole thing here. Why is the opinion of a 16-year-old high schooler upsetting me so much? Because she and I used to be GREAT friends, before her "perfect" brother lost HIS temper and beat the fuck out of me and raped me, and I left and filed a report with NCIS and he's now filling her head with what a horrible person I am.
Sorry. Done ranting now.
SG, Im a stranger to you (considering my short time here so far), but I have come to really admire and respect you. You are in my thoughts and I am sending my best wishes and hopes for a better outcome your way.
Oh Treas. Looks like she is purposefully trying to hurt you, to get back at you, for hurting her "perfect brother". You have to think of her as an extension of him at this point. She's chosen sides, and in her case, she landed on the side of shared biology.
:comfort:
Thats SOP for a divorce type of situation. Been there, had that done to me (the lies part). It is too early yet in your situation with emotions still running crazy. Things change over time. You can explain your side to her and let her have a year or so to reflect upon it, maybe she will see, maybe not either way you tried. Thats all you can do.
Not really upsetting, but as of tomorrow I am officially unemployed.
I've come to a parting of the ways with EEA.
I'm not going to go into it all here, suffice to say we had a difference of opinion and I felt it was best all round to resign. Since I reached that decision they have behaved impeccably, I admit.
I'm not quite sure what to do with myself now. I'm probably going home this weekend to have a serious talk with my parents. I'm not in the most stable of positions right now, as I based my ability to pay the rent on my (good) salary. I'd be very lucky to find something that paid the same in the next month, especially without a good reference.
Well I'll see what Mum & Dad say. I hope they'll accept me back for a couple of months and let me find my feet. Funny how even 6 months ago the idea horrified me, but now I am seriously hoping they'll consider it. I'm beginning to get tired of the rollercoaster I'm afraid.
Anyway, I'm not too down, oddly enough. I've not cried, got drunk or gone into the usual freefall panic mode. It's just one of those things and one way or another I'll get through it.
Funny the difference a week makes.
EEA won't necessarily refuse to give you a good reference, especially if they're taking your decision in their stride at the moment. Just because you've disagreed doesn't mean they'll want to spoil your chances of future employment.
Meanwhile, I hope you know how we're all on your side here, admiring the way you're holding it together.
Hugs, definitely.
Umm...My heart is shattered into 50 million pieces. It's so cliche to say that, but that's exactly how it feels. So there isn't a better way to say it, outside of saying that there is a feeling, that there is a light film of hell sticking to my reality. I can see through it but that doesn't keep the hell from being there. I can't sleep. I wake up too early, and then I can't pull it together. I'm usually high-functioning but I can't concentrate when my heart hurts, and I just cry when I have to talk to anyone. I need to think right now, but I can't concentrate. Why does my body fail me when I need it the most? I need it to get in gear like a little trooper. I'll give it a couple more hours to shape up. What a crybaby. Waah. I hope that when I am done whining I actually get something accomplished.
Fu**. My body does what it wants sometimes because it's stupid. I tell it one thing and it does something else.
:( Maybe I missed it -- what the hell happened, Cic?
Yeah, Cic...we're here for you if you feel like talking.
Sorry, hon. :(
I hope that when I am done I actually get something accomplished.
You will!
I understand because someone I know mirrors those same words.
My husband wants a divorce. I have to move out. Of course the truck is his, so I have to find somewhere to live in town that allows pets, and is close enough to the job I'm not even technically employed at yet. My parents are right, I might have to move to Mississippi, as I don't have any friends or family here, and not much of a job to go to. This is an expensive place for one income and the real jobs are scant.
Do I say fuck it, I can't make it on my own out here like this? Ask my mom to hit the highway and pick me up so I can load up the vehicle and pup?
Or do I get on craigslist and search for house share situations or an apartment, and live on my own like I always have?
I've always lived on my own outside of the brief marriage I've had, and a couple of roommates.
So my husband seems final about it. I have to get my act together and make some decisions. Except every time I stand up to put myself together I cry. I need to get out of here and start hunting today. Or make the call to my mummy. There really isn't anything in this town for me, as I haven't even made a close friend since living here. Just all work and life in the country.....
My mom wants me to stay here until I've been to more appointments with the doctors that I've made. It's just a toss. I don't know. Everything was normal 2 days ago, and now I have a new life to start, that from this vantage point, seems a little dismal. Oh well. I'll try to move about some more. My puppy seems bored with my current attitude. Small miracle, I don't have to work today.
Ok I'm getting up and at it. Thanks for listening. I can't start dysfunctional habits now.. I just have to do.
Shit!
Oh Cic I'm so sorry.
Christ, Cic, I'm so sorry. What a kick in the guts. *hugs*
Don't beat yourself up over going back to your mum's though. It's the done thing *smiles* I know I did it when me and J split. It might even do you good. There's something nourishing about going back to base for a bit. And something major like this isnt something you should have to cope with alone.
I hope you get it together, and you know where we are if you need to vent.
I'm so sorry, Cic. There's no shame in leaning on your parents at a time like this, so don't see it as some sort of personal failure.
Just hang in there.
Go to your Moms Cic. You can figure out the rest of your life from there. Its one way to get rid of the hell-tainted film on your life. I know how that film looks and feels...action is the best reaction.
Sorry for your troubles Cic. Perhaps you may want to just go back home and regroup. Thats what I did and it turned out to be a really good thing for me mentally, emotionally... all around.
wow, sorry cissy. that's pretty harsh. I wish i had some wisdom i could share about this kind of thing, but i don't. I can, however, give you a big virtual hug.
:::::::::::::::HUG:::::::::::::::::
aw, you got snot on my shirt. that's ok...I got it....I have one of those tide sticks in the car.
Practically everybody I know has gone back to the nest for a period at some point between the ages 25 and 50.
All the cool kids are doing it.
Seriously though, I'm sorry you are facing this now. It sucks. If it were me, I'd probably head home for a while.
Aw, I'm sorry ciccy, that's just plain shitty. Kick him in the cunt for me on your way out eh?
Go home, it's too cold there anyway.
Oh ffs. Cic, I'm so sorry. You girl, you are awesome and you will come out even better on the other side, but I'm so sorry you're hurting right now.
Double kick him in the cunt, one for jinx and one for me. Oh hell, I'm sure we're not the only ones, go ahead and kick him in the cunt about 5 thousand times.
Though I never actually moved back in with the 'rents, they were there for me when I needed them and that, my dear, is the warmest feeling in the world. I knew I could go there if I needed to.
Love you girl. Keep talking to us, if it helps.
Oh, Cic... -big hugs- I'm so sorry you're going through this right now. I'm thinking of you and praying for you... I wish there was something I could do or say to help, but I don't think there is. Just know that I'm sending good thoughts and prayers your way, and if you want me to help you look for housing on Craigslist, just let me know; I'm always online when I'm not at work anyways, and it wouldn't be any trouble at all. Just let me know what area of New Mexico to search, honey. Best of luck.
Mum's in hospital overnight on anti-biotics and all-night observation. She has advanced cellulitis, caught slightly before it turned into septicemia (sp?).
She was complaining last night about an insect bite on her finger. When I spoke to her this morning she said it had swollen up quite badly. I'd suggested seeing her doctor, but she wanted to see how it was over the weekend and go next week if it didnt clear. When she dropped Pilau back at my house this evening, she showed me and her forefinger, half her hand and thumb were swollen up like a balloon. Bright red and angry looking.
I said to her she should go down to the infirmary, but she really didnt want to. In the end I shouted at her (felt guilt about that, but when I spoked to her later she hadnt remembered me doing so. I said to her, it could be serious. Then she shows me a red line starting to track up her arm under the skin. I said she had to at least go down the road and get our Jen's advice (she's a nurse) because if its tracking up the arm that sounds like it could be really bad and end up with blood poisoning or something.
Anyway she left her dog with me and off she went, where Jen, my brother and the two girls insisted in no uncertain terms that she was going to the infirmary. Martin and Jen were on the way out, so the girls went in the car with Ma down to A&E. (this was about 9:30pm)
My eldest niece phoned me around 11.30 to say she was being kept in overnight, and my brother was on his way back home to gather up stuff to take to her in hospital and pick the girls up. ..A further phone call revealed that she may be in for a couple of days.
Apparently had she left it for the weekend she would have ended up with septicemia and things could have got very nasty, very fast. Whilst she was waiting to be seen she phoned me and said that the single red line which had reached a few centimetres past her wrist had extended halfway up her arm and two new tracks had started to run up as well...in half an hour.
I felt so sorry for her. She just wanted to go home and settle for the night and instead she had to go do all that. Apparently she was a little spaced out. 'Meels said she seemed like she didnt know what to do with herself and a little in shock. They'd all expected to come home armed with a bottle of anti-biotics.
It's really bothering me that she must have been scared when the reality of the situation kicked in and she realised that she had something serious (though very treatable).
So sorry to hear that Cic. Don't bother kicking him in the cunt, just stick some nice cut up fish in the furnace vents, pee on the mattress, flush about 20 tampons down the toilets, then pack your stuff and hit the road. Now is a time to be with people you can trust to love you. If there is nothing major holding you to the city there is no reason to stay. Regardless of your choice remember the cellar is not just for abuse, but also support. A few of us have been through the divorce blender and come out the other side - don't be afraid to vent or ask advice.
Dana - tell your mom I'm sorry about her fingur.
Cicero: OMG. I can't even begin to tell you how sorry I am. I can't tell you what to do; and I know how hard it must be to think and make decisions right now.
Be glad you have a family that's willing to help you out, tho I can't say if that is the best thing. Because you are having health problems ( and btw, what kind of a dick does that to a wife facing such things?) maybe it would be better to stick around for a while to keep appts and such.
Oh, crap, that just sucks. :(
This god damn thread is depressing.
Cic, we and your puppy still love you.
I have to agree moving home sucks, but you need to be with people that care about you and will provide the support you need right now. Unfortunately, we can't give you that kind of hands on, up close and personal, kind of support. But we got moral support, galore, so don't lose touch with your friends, ok? :grouphug:
Dana, take good care of the old girl. Lord knows she's earned it, having to carry the burden of a socialist, rabble rousing, daughter. :p
you forgot communist - bruce
:grouphug: for Cicero. Don't be harsh on yourself for the fact that this has spun you out some. That is only to be expected.
If it weren't for the medical appointments I'd say hit the road within a week. Regardless of timing, I think heading back to your family is the best plan. It'll give you a few months to stabilise, take stock, think about what you want to do next. Best wishes for you.
Dana: do not feel bad about shouting at your mum. You probably saved her from losing her hand, if not worse.
I'm so sorry, Cicero. Great advice given so far. You'll be in my thoughts, wish I could help more. :(
That SUCKS Big Time Cic !!!!
Go home , regroup , Cuss Kick Cry !!!!!!
Then get on with it !!!
Peace and strength, Cicero. It's a tough situation but you can make it - and remember, you have a lot of good Cellar juju to help.
I'm so sorry Cic. Going home might be good for your soul.
Dana, that sounds like when my sister cut her hand and left it.
She wouldn't listen to anyone though - she even went against the advice of the hospital who wanted to admit her immediately because she had to get the kids home and give them their tea or some such non-life threatening thing.
It's scary how close other people can come to very serious repercussions (L was 2? 3? nights in hospital and could also have lost her hand) for the sake of a little TLC. Me, I rush off to get everything looked at these days and am told politely but definitely, "No, there's nothing we can do, time will heal this..."
Really sorry that your Mum's been spooked by this. My very best wishes to her.
I'm home, and through phase 1 of the revelation - Mum now knows I'm out of work. Phase 2 comes when I ask to move back home. I'm going to give that at least another week - part cowardice and part so she believes I have seriously considered my options. I have, but Mum would think I haven't had time yet if I mentioned it now. I developed this two pronged approach on the train here today. Ahem.
*smiles* You sound like you've developed a refined strategy for parent management :P
Talking of which...
Went to see mum, first around lunchtime and then again this evening. She was quite perky, if a little spacecake, but was prettyu convinced she'd be coming home tonight (i might point out she was absolutely alone in this conviction). They'd talked about seeing how she was after 24 hours, but that would have taken her to midnight, so we spoke to the nurse and they got a doctor to come look.
Given her hand still looks like a foam hand at a football match, and she keeps going very hot...and the red lines are still there, it wasn't a huge surprise to the rest of us that she's going nowhere tonight:P
They're keeping her in the observation ward again tonight and they'll see how she is tomorrow...she may end up doing a few nights.
The nurse that came to see her earlier told her that in the days before antibiotics, those fingers of red reaching up the arms or legs were known as the 'lines of death', the precursor to the end, from there into the heart, from the heart to the entire body, organ failure and death to follow in short order. God bless antibiotics.
So, I am at mum's house still. She meanwhile seems to have relaxed into the situation and is resting up. She's paid £5 for 24 hours access to the satellite tv that swings in over the bed and has headphones. We left her settling down to watch X-Factor. :)
[eta] also, you know there's always that little niggle with hospitals and doctors that they may miss something...well, I read on wiki that if cellulitis isn't properly treated it can appear to go then stay in the system and reoccur weeks, months or even years later. So, I was really relieved to hear the doctor explain to mum that one of the reasons she isn't going home is that if they don't get on top of it properly it can come back.
The guy who had the cross burned in his yard just had a stroke.:thepain:
Good luck with Mom Dana.
It sounds like your mom is in good hands, Dana. My hand always looks like the foam hands, because I'm number 1!!! Just kidding.....I bet it's a huge relief she'll be home in a matter of days. Poor thing. I hope they are giving her the good stuff. :)
And of course, thanks guys for being cool about my complaints lately. You guys are awesome for taking this crap from me! ;) Piss. Moan....Piss moan..bluuurgh. I'm hoping to hit the lottery tonight, and I can buy the cellar, and me an island. I'll fly you all in on my private jetz. Heck, even UT is invited. ;)
At least I'm still crazy.
You can take my pride, but you can't take my crazy, 'tis mine, and I love it!!
You guys are neat-o. Thanks. :)
I haven't received a pay slip, meaning my money won't be through until at least next Wednesday (the Finance Officer only works Monday to Wednesday and BACs takes 3 days to clear.
If the money was in today (as I really hoped, checking my account before the post arrived) I was going to go home. Mia is fine and I'm missing Diz badly. I wasn't too worried that the money wasn't there, thinking that she must have processed it on Wednesday instead. But if she had, I would have received the slip today - the post came and it wasn't there.
This means waiting til Sunday and borrowing money off Mum & Dad for my fare home. They already left me some money to buy food (because they run down their stocks when they're going away). I wanted to repay that, not ask for more - I'm not 15!
And that means my poor babba will be home alone for over a week - I feel awful. I came here on the understanding that as soon as they received my letter of resignation and keys, I would be paid (they confirmed receipt on Tuesday). I can only assume that it needs authorisation and is waiting on someone's desk. There's no point calling, the Finance Officer is the only one who can put it through and she is not there. Sigh. My poor parents, having such a fuck up as a daughter.
All I can do is make sure the place is spotless when they get back, apologise and assure them that this is not money disappearing into a black hole. I should try to find a job too (well I have been looking of course, I mean I should be applying). It just seemed a little forward when I hadn't officially asked if I could move back in.
Oh, and I have a coldsore coming, with no medication in the house and no money to buy any. That's what comes of fretting and worrying all day!
For the record, I have been out and about a lot - going down to walk by the (admittedly small and man-made) lake and around the park. I have been keeping regular hours and sleeping well. It doesn't sound like much, but last week I was staying awake til 03.00 or 04.00 - really not good for me.
Sorry to be such a moaner. Writing it down puts it in perspective a bit for me.
I am sure your parents would be quite upset to hear you say they have a fuck-up for a daughter. They love you.
When I was going through my really bad times, I expressed about the same to my mom. My brothers are all doing well (older bro had some hard times but is just amazing now...successful and happy, younger bro has just always had it going on) and my mom, a strong person, showed the sadness on her face, that I felt that way. She told me how much they love me, and some wonderful things about being her daughter and her partner in crime concerning artistic and political sensibilities.
You are a human, who is going through a rough time. You are coping, though it might not feel that way to you all the time. Don't be your own worst enemy.
It's going to feel so good to you when you come out on the other side. In the meantime, absolutely you should write exactly how you feel, here where you feel safe to do so. But you know there are those of us who are going to say "yeah, but you DON'T suck!" :)
Great post Shawnee...I second it.
I third it. Chin up, SG... you're loved, both by your family and your friends here on the Cellar. We don't think you're a fuck-up... and we're very proud of you for soldiering on. You can do this. And we're all cheering for you. :)
I fourth that post and if you pm me the right address I'll post you some Zovirax (brand new, unused tube).
Thanks, friends.
Good news tonight was that Mum called and asked me to do her a favour (which was no trouble at all of course). While on the phone she said Dad & her had had a talk and sorted things out... then backtracked quickly and said that they had some ideas about things I might want to think about. Her next sentence was saying they'd been through the Bucks Herald and the Bucks Free Press (two local papers, they're house-sitting about 20 miles away) so I'm pretty sure their talk was whether they could take their wayward daughter back into the fold. Both those papers have job sections and rentals. I have a feeling they'll offer to fund me to move in with someone (ie pay my deposit and first month's rent). I'd rather hold out for an invite home, so I can have a settled life pattern first (eating, sleeping working) while also contributing to the household. Then I can think about independence. Also if I'm here they can do more house-sitting without paying for the Mia cat to go into a cattery (which reduces their profits down to almost zero). They keep the heating and lights on timer when they're away anyway - fear of pipes bursting and thieves - so I can really help. Can you tell I've been rehearsing this justification to myself?
Mum also asked if I had enough money to be getting by on. Not that this is a super-good thing, because I get so much love and support from them and they have never had much money, but just because it shows she doesn't see it the same way I do - that I am mercilessly scalping my beloved parents.
Thanks for the offer Limey, thanks very much. To be honest the sore came up yesterday and is now full-blown - by the time I get your tube it'll (I hope) be in remission. It's ugly and sore, but I can deal with that. Keep it for your next outbreak (although here's hoping that doesn't happen!) those things are expensive!
Thanks again folks. I will have some good news one day. I am not a natural disaster.
I fourth that post and if you pm me the right address I'll post you some Zovirax (brand new, unused tube).
Umm. I'm all out of single malt? :o
SG, it's a pity you aren't on this side of the pond. There's a LOT of places around here for rent at really reasonable prices... and the cabin that I'm renting from Ted has enough room for an extra person (and critters!) if you wanted some stability/pattern before going all indie on us :P
I'm moving into case's downstairs apartment. Someone should let her know....;)
It was the stove, wasn't it?
Oh hai. Didn't uh see you there...:) lol! Yes, it was the stove, and all that furniture I can just make. I need a good sturdy twin bed. ;)
My lil girl is very sick... high fever, vomiting, lethargic, etc... and has been up crying since four a.m. despite being cuddled, rocked, kissed, loved on, and generally made much of. I'm not sure how to make it better. And to top it off, I found out today that my uncle Mervin died Tuesday... and no one thought to tell me about it, let alone that the funeral was yesterday. Because I would have liked to go and pay my last respects. G*ddamnit.
Alternate doses of baby tylenol and motrin, cool cloths on her head and neck, Pedialyte in her bottle. If she shows signs of dehydration, time to go to the doctor ASAP. Might not be a bad idea regardless.
So sorry about your uncle. Wonder why they didn't think to tell you?
Juni, I'm doing the Tylenol/motrin/cool clothes thing. I'll go pick up pedialyte. Is it ok to use the store brand?
And my parents didn't tell me because they pretty much refuse to talk to me unless it's to remind me to pay my student loan (which comes directly out of my paycheck) or to pull something like this. "Oh, by the way, your uncle Mervin died. I just got back from the funeral late last night."
Is it ok to use the store brand?
Yes. Store-brand items can often be lower-quality knockoffs, but there's a solid baseline you can't go below with medications. Like maybe it won't taste as good as the brand-name stuff, but legally it will have all the medical ingredients it needs.
My tired lazy ass today. I have so much stuff to do. I want to go back to bed....oooh!
Who's got the good drugs ay? Cicero. Get up. Move soldier!!! Moooove iiiiit!
bleeergh...
Thank you, Clod. Good info to know.
Cicero: motivation... -tosses a lit stick of dynamite under your chair- You got thirty seconds :D
I need a good sturdy twin bed. ;)
Writer's block. Writing smut should not be this difficult!!!
"Dear Penthouse,
I was sitting at my computer, trying to overcome the worst case of writer's block I've ever had. I was interrupted by the doorbell . . . . "
That would be a great first post for a thread. But I ain't gonna be the one to do it.
on the way home from picking the kids up I realised I'm exhausted.
The reason I came to this realisation is because I started crying when someone wouldn't let me in in heavy traffic on the highway.
What a sook. I think I'll go to bed early tonight.
Large list of errands to run today, managed to get the kids up and ready and out the door, everything was looking peachy--and then Minifob started projectile vomiting all over the car. No errands today then...
Mmmm. Peachy vomit. :vomitblu:
Lack of vacation is making me upset today. I am definitely "in the hole" for next year. I would be happy to take some time no-pay, but my employer frowns on that.
Received bad news on an old friend who has been fighting esophageal cancer. He will probably not be in this world much longer. He's a father, a husband, a drummer, and a generally all around good soul.
Eh, I can't make sense of this world, I guess. :(
That's because this world makes no sense Shawnee. My heart goes out to you, him, family and friends.
I'm sorry to hear about your friend, Shawnee. Somewhere, Osama bin Laden is still alive, and your friend is dying.
Proof that the world is neither logical nor kind. Be strong.
I'm sorry Shawnee. :( You know I have ears if you ever wanna talk about it. ::hugs::
His family needs you, and it's good to give them support right now if they need it. ;) Even if it's just monetary.
Keep the chin up girl, and try not to dwell on it too much. There are things that will never make sense, and you can just try your best to move through them as gracefully as possible.
And if you keep making that sour face I will be forced to tickle the Shaw! ;) Just kidding...PM me if you need anything.
That sucks, Shawnee. sorry.
Thanks guys.
He is a guy who has been in a couple bands with my ex...notably a band that was pretty popular around here for years. He married a woman I happened to know from my childhood, then later as a young adult...then we reconnected. His oldest daughter graduated last year from the place I used to work, his youngest just got married. I'm glad he was there for those milestones...though he couldn't actually be there for the graduation because he was going through some pretty intense treatment. He's just an all around good guy, and no one gets this turn of events. He didn't smoke, but this is the same kind of cancer that took his father a few years ago.
I'll always think of him drumming and singing "Here comes Johnny singin' oldies, goldies
Be-bop-a-lula, baby what I say..."
Ach Shawnee, I'm sorry to hear about your friend. The unfairness of it all must be upsetting.
I'm sorry to hear about your friend, Shawnee... :( -sends comforting hugs-
I am currently on crutches, a knee immobilizer, and oxycodone. Somehow, during dance practice on Sunday, I blew out my right knee. Not sure what I did... it started aching a little bit so I went and sat down to rest... next thing I know, I couldn't move it and was screaming in pain. So I've gotta make an appointment with an orthopedist at some point soon... and chances are because of the downtime I need to heal up, I'll be losing my (WONDERFUL) new job that I absolutely love. -sighs- Some days, I really dislike being me.
Oh crap, Trea! PAINFUL.
My senior year of HS basketball, I came down from a rebound and felt my knee give. The quack I went to swore it was leeegamints, and there wasn't much they could do. At a dance my freshman year of college, I boogied a litttle too far to the side, apparently, and my knee totally locked up. Went home and got a knee immobilizer and crutches and spent half my first quarter of college hoofin' it to class via crutches. There was NO putting weight on that leg, or bending it. It was fun when my crutches hit a wet leaf and I went sprawling. Turns out my meniscus had been torn, and when dancing had basically curled up. They took it out over thanksgiving break...except for a few reminders here and there it's done pretty well.
Hope it feels better. One thing...they gave me NO painkillers back then. The bastards. Had to rely on beer!
-laughs- I suggested beer to Ted... he about deafened me hollering about the horrors of mixing oxycodone and alcohol. Thing was, I was only teasing him a bit... I'd never be THAT!! incredibly stupid. He took two days off of work to spoil me and watch the kidlet for me... he's such a sweetheart! Today he went back to work and I'm hobbling around on crutches trying to figure out how to use the crutches and carry the baby at the same time. Not working so well.
Remind me again, what it is you do for a living Trease? Is there no way you could continue your job on crutches?
I take care of the pets for sale at PetSmart... involves lots of lifting, carrying, shoving, pulling, pushing, kneeling, etc., so no... I wouldn't really be able to do it on crutches. Or with an immobilizer, although I could get away with it if I didn't have to have the crutches.
Anxiety attacks. loads of fun. Not major emergency room visit style, but heavy weight on the chest, nausea, heart racing, completely overwhelmed style. yeah loving it. I know in a few hours it'll be over and I'll still be alive and kicking but it sucks.
Most of my clients listened to me and made what I felt were appropriate portfolio changes last fall/winter. Some didn't. I made them sign statements pointing out they were ignoring my best advice so I won't get sued or anything but I still get to face these people and explain in stomach churning detail why they have half the money today that they did last year.
To make matters worse, the people I have to see in an hour and a half were warned they were withdrawing too much too soon even before the market downturn. They have about a 15% chance of not outliving their money now. Will it matter that I warned them and asked for action a long time ago? No. Not at all. I'm still the piece of shit that lost their money. I'm the evil guy who they'll blame when they can't afford to do something they want for the next 30 fucking years.
It won't matter that I sat them down and explained in painful detail what needed to change, how to cut expenses, how to minimize risk, and even showed them that the changes I was begging for would result in lowered income for me... I will still be the devil incarnate when they talk to friends and family. When they consider going back to work. When they talk to the other families on the block who have been doing business with me for years.
Pardon me while I go puke again.
*shakes head* that sucks right royally, Lookout.
I know it's frustrating, but you know you did right by them. Try not to think too much about what they're saying to other people. This is the nature of the business you are in; if your advice is taken and money is made, your clients will pat themselves on the back for their financial acumen (i.e they chose a good advisor :P) on the other hand if your advice is not taken or money is not made, you are a handy scapegoat for their own sense of panic and inadequacy.
It sucks, but it is the way that it is, and probably has always been so. It is an unfortunate fact of business that happy customers tell far fewer people about their joy than unhappy customers tell of their dismay. But that doesn't mean they don't tell anyone. You no doubt have clients who've done pretty well by you. They may not tell as many people as the dickheads who ignored your advice (for which they were paying, which is totally bizarre. Why buy advice that you are just going to ignore?) but the next time a friend is considering their investments, they may well drop them your details.
If the dickheads are teling people who've been doing business with you for years then the likelihood is that the experience they relate to those people will be entirely at odds with those people's own experience of doing business with you. They may wonder a little, they may even feel their friend has been hard done by...but most people need a fairly compelling reason to change service providers in any area of life.
This post probably wasn't much help to you...in essence you could boil it down to one sentence: don't let the bastards grind you down *smiles*
eh, thanks. It isn't so much that I worry about what they are saying. I live in a city of millions and I'm licensed in other states as well. there are always more clients to uncover. It's really the stress of sitting with people, looking them in the eye, and telling them horrible truth. They can blame me or not blame me, but it doesn't change the fact that these people have watched their retirement dreams get flushed. it may be by their own decisions but the fact still remains they work for 30+ years with a reasonable expectation of a comfortable retirement. I now have to sit with them and explain that Yes, I know they are ready to make some changes now, but I've run the numbers dozens of different ways and the answer keeps coming back the same - they will outlive their money. It sounds cliche and ridiculous but people don't hire me to watch money - they hire me to ensure they reach life goals. I've been spending waaaaaay too much of my time over the last few months explaining to people that its time to come up with different goals because the old ones? not gonna happen.
:comfort:
Think of all the people you did help, LO. The majority of clients that took some or all of your sound advice, and are consequently much better off than they would have been.
You can't save people from themselves. :headshake
ETA: the future's not guaranteed. You work hard, you do (mostly) the right thing, and guess what? Sometimes, life still sucks. Like getting diagnosed with cancer 6 months after your retirement...
We've never gotten upset with our financial adviser (not sure if that's what you do but it sounds like it could be). Then again, we've done everything he's suggested, only adjusting a few times for the risk we were willing to accept under our current situation when he made the suggestions. I know he has more knowledge, both current and historical, than us. I don't know that he has the same conscience and sense of personal responsibility as you. Tell me again, in what states are you licensed? :)
My aunt and uncle retired about 12 months ago. They're now worth 30% less than they thought they'd have to retire on. Fortunately they reckon they're going to outlive this crisis and end up being ok anyway.
The good thing for them is they not only have shares as investments but they have realestate which they draw an income from.
I guess it's always good to have a couple of different investments so you're not totally reliant on one income stream.
People are just angry and afraid and upset as you know lookout. It's really not personal when everyone's in the same boat. These people have relied on your advice that's for sure, but they could have made different choices also. You're not responsible for the choices they've made in the end. You've only offered them choices.
I haz a headache and thrush.
Being a chick soooooooo rocks
Get thee to the chemist! (and stay there till you're better lol)
Busted water heater discovered as I entered the shower.... and they can't fix it till next week per Home Warrenty contractor... Bullshit I say... you want me to keep the home warrenty it will be fixed today...
Get 'em honey! Rip their balls off! [SIZE="1"][COLOR="White"]help me get her all riled up, she's great at this stuff[/COLOR][/SIZE]
I called AHS back and said "You honestly expect me, my husband (who has to go to work every day... clean and well groomed), my two children for whom meal time is more of a contact sport than it is eating and a bath is absolutely required... you expect us to shower in freezing ass cold water duing the winter for 4 days? No... this is our ONLY hot water heater in our Only shower/ bath and there is a HUGE amount of water on my floor... the lenolium is pealing up and rolling over on itself, the wood is puffing and I just had 20K worth of foundation repair work done. No I cannot wait till tomorrow much less next week. I need it fixed today or I will call around and find a company who can fix it... and believe me if I have to pay for this out of my own pocket... I WILL CANCEL MY WARRENTY WITH YOU... you will NOT talk me out of it this time." The poor bastard on the other end of the phone said he'd bump it up to an emergency and they call me within 2 hours... so at this point they have 1 hour left to produce a solution before I cut them off and pay for a new water heater with my fucking credit card... I would have been able to buy one outright had I not been paying my monthly warrenty bill... the ONLY 3 reasons I've kept them... 1. the AC is 22 years old and bound to die soon, the Hotwater is 12, the huge double oven around which the kitchen was designed is 55 years old. They are supposed to replace if unrepairable. I 've just been afraid they die at a time when we couldn't manage to fix them on our dime.
I haven't really slept in 3 days thanks to the little boy.... and dammnit all I wanted this morning was a hot shower to stand in for about an hour while I try to remind myself that he his just teething not trying to drive me insane.
while I try to remind myself that he his just teething not trying to drive me insane.
Frozen washcloths saved us. Run water over half a washcloth. Wring it out and put it in the freezer. We kept three or four of these things going. Let 'em chew on the frozen end. The cold and the texture do the trick.
I've never heard a positive story regarding home warranties. I think they are a scam.
I hope you prove me wrong.
All warranties are a scam. Rule #1 never bet against the house because the house always wins.
All that money you pay monthly could be going towards new appliances. When the 55 year old stove craps out and they have to replace it will it be replaced with a $100. Roper or a $5500 Vulcan?
AHS did replace the hot water heater and AC unit on my first house. Slow and inefficient but saved me a bunch of money.
We recently put up an expensive fence to keep the neighbor's big bozo dogs from bounding into our yard and terrorizing our softy dog (she likes other dogs, but dogs with manners - a heritage from her show career) and so she and our new dog could play outdoors. We did not fence the lake side of the yard, thinking that a 50" high fence around 3 sides would cause them to roam elsewhere. There were just in my yard, minutes after the pups and I came in. Grrrr! The dogs are just big, clumsy, energetic oafs who like to splash in the lake (one is a lab) but hey! The potential death/injury to my own dogs in their own fenced yard is real. Maybe I'll ask Santa Claus for a pet lion. Or shark. Yeah, that's the ticket.
SW... I can understand your fear. That is exactly... well minus the water... reason we didn't buy a house 2 streets over ( which actually, save that issue would have been a better choice for us) the neighbor next door had Akitas and they were known to break loose and kill other enighbor dogs... with a baby on the way that senerio didn't sit well with us. The neighborhood was taking the dog owner to court, but had tried before with no positive results. It is difficult to control others... even harder ... their dogs.
BTW... just talked to AHS... the new contractor is "working me in and will be here as soon as they can" I reminded him that I have yet to bath and my kids and I are still in our nighties. The sooner the better please... I have other things that I need to do today outside the house...
Why is it that contractors/ businesses feel it is acceptable to make us wait around on them all day??? Take the cable or phone companies for example... 8am to 8 pm is not a timeframe. Thats the whole day.
Have you seen the theory that it was Nicole Brown Simpson's Akita that killed her and Ron Goldman? Weirds. Not that the dog couldn't kill a person, but that it would wear gloves to do so. :)
glove wearing dogs upset you?
Dogs shouldnt be allowed to wear gloves. It cheapens all the legitimate and faithful glove wearers, all over world. Who do glove-wearing dogs hurt? Everyone.
:lol:
Sorry, Akitas turning vicious? What's next, killer poodles?
BTW... just talked to AHS... the new contractor is "working me in and will be here as soon as they can" I reminded him that I have yet to bath and my kids and I are still in our nighties. .
Did you stress just how sheer your nightie was? and lacy? And low cut?
All warranties are a scam. Rule #1 never bet against the house because the house always wins.
All that money you pay monthly could be going towards new appliances. When the 55 year old stove craps out and they have to replace it will it be replaced with a $100. Roper or a $5500 Vulcan?
3-year warranties on steam vacs are the business. One payment of $40, the $300 vac always fail at about 2.5 years, they give you a new one and sell you another $40 warranty for another 3 years. So we've paid $$420 for an excellent steam cleaner that's lasted 7 years and is still as good as new and has another two years in it with no extra cost....
I feel sure that one day they will cotton on that steam vacs are not as simple as vaccuuum cleaners and break down far more often... but until then :D
"Look, all my clothes are dirty so I'm running around naked. I'd get my husband to do it, but he's away in Tierra del Fuego for another month on business. I really need to be taken care of right away..."
Or something like that.
Pardon me while I go puke again.
Sorry Look, I just saw this. Exercise, meditation, and progressive muscle relaxation.
This site has a couple tools which are good for tracking and coping with stress. Good luck man. Breathe.
Maybe we need a new thread for this, but in light of Elspode's situation and lookout's and the rest of us, should we be comparing notes about "What the hell is your game plan for when the really big shit hits the fan?" This is only the fumes of the shit that is coming.
In another thread Ali mentions people growing their own veggies. How many pounds of potatoes to pay your property taxes and mortgage?
All around me people are being laid off, I wonder what they are all going to do since around here people live pretty lean to start with.
Someone sent me this
http://www.thepowerhour.com/news/items_disappearfirst.htm
How soon will we be in this situation or will we?
Think of all the people you did help, LO. The majority of clients that took some or all of your sound advice, and are consequently much better off than they would have been.
You can't save people from themselves.
Excellent, excellent advice Pie.
From what I know of you around the Cellar, you are a genuine guy who honestly just wants the best for people.
You did your best to inform them, don't second guess yourself. "I could have, I should have..." will only get you more sick. It sucks royally to be the bearer of bad news, but at some point you have to remind yourself that they are ultimately responsible for their own actions. You aren't a bad person for letting it go. In fact, it's imperative you
do let it go. Easier said than done I know.
I hope that there is little collateral damage if they do badmouth you. Hopefully anyone they whine to will either
a) already know they are an idiot and be impressed that you gave them good advice (that they didn't take) and will look you up. or
b) just be another idiot who also wouldn't listen to your advice, who now you don't have to worry about dealing with.
No calls from my headhunters this week. Unemployment skyrocketing. Maybe I am well and truly fucked after all?
As a former IT headhunter I'd advise you to be very very proactive even if you feel like you might be irritating them. Be in regular contact with the headhunters. Right now they have a lot of resumes sitting on their desk with nothing but the name and most recent job description showing.
In all honesty they are probably spending most of their time right now calling companies begging for orders to fill. The last time this happened a lot of companies started doing their own recruiting and hiring again to avoid the fees. Headhunter fees are only worthwhile if there is more demand than supply.
No calls from my headhunters this week. Unemployment skyrocketing. Maybe I am well and truly fucked after all?
Nobody hires in December. You'll find something in first quarter.
Maybe we need a new thread for this, but in light of Elspode's situation and lookout's and the rest of us, should we be comparing notes about "What the hell is your game plan for when the really big shit hits the fan?" This is only the fumes of the shit that is coming.
In another thread Ali mentions people growing their own veggies. How many pounds of potatoes to pay your property taxes and mortgage?
All around me people are being laid off, I wonder what they are all going to do since around here people live pretty lean to start with.
Someone sent me this http://www.thepowerhour.com/news/items_disappearfirst.htm
How soon will we be in this situation or will we?
80 people from Dazza's office were made redundant on Thursday of this week. D should be fine, but we were talking about our game plan on the way home yesterday.
Did you start the new thread F3?
I'm sending myself to therapy. :( Ah well....can't be healthy forever.
Sometimes therapy is a good thing. I had some earlier this year and it helped a lot.
I hope you're as lucky.
I lost my original wedding ring several years ago, and hubby bought me one of those One Ring facsimiles from LotR - a big, heavy solid gold ring. Last night I noticed it wasn't on my hand, and I have no idea where it could be, although I shredded 4 bags of paperwork and threw it out, and did a lot of cleaning indoors and out, and it could be anywhere... I've lost my Precious. Now I know how Gollum felt. Damn damn damn.
Nightmares. Dammit all the way to the hot place and back. My therapist keeps telling me... has been telling me for half a dozen years... that they'll slowly fade, happen less and less frequently. Yeah, that's so not happening. I can't keep waking up in a screaming, fighting mess. It's not fair to Ted, it's not fair to my now terrified daughter, and dammit I'm just sick of reliving those two years of my life. This SUCKS!
And I am about 95% convinced that our new dog is about 95% deaf. It is not a deal breaker, but it means I will have to train him using gestures, lights, and whistles rather than simple verbal instructions while teaching the other dog using the same methods. And I will be adding the "go get him" command so she can help me get him back when he wanders off across the yard. :kettle:
Nightmares. Dammit all the way to the hot place and back. My therapist keeps telling me... has been telling me for half a dozen years... that they'll slowly fade, happen less and less frequently. Yeah, that's so not happening. I can't keep waking up in a screaming, fighting mess. It's not fair to Ted, it's not fair to my now terrified daughter, and dammit I'm just sick of reliving those two years of my life. This SUCKS!
I am sorry about your nightmares. Does your temperature have any effect on whether or not you have them? I know when I am feverish or just plain hot, I get them pretty much without fail.
I have nightmares irregularly, but I still have them. Like migraines I get irritated when people call bad dreams nightmares - like calling headaches migraines (I am not directing this at you Trea - my nightmare criteria certainly includes waking up screaming!).
Sorry to hear you are afflicted - mine are separated by YEARS but still distress me.
No work here in Aylesbury. Or so it seems. Bear in mind I was looking for a healing period of bar/ restaurant/ supermarket work while I was looking for another job! I'll have to start pushing the agencies I signed up with (although to be fair they said it was unlikely they'd have anything for me before Christmas) and after that just be prepared to work my socks off at anything - pizza delivery, cleaning, ironing etc.
Oh and I'm worried about Diz - he doesn't look any thinner to me, but his collar is a lot looser. The spectre of diabetes raises its head again, only without the funds for a thorough investigation. I'm sure it's paranoia. But he's the only living being I think would suffer if I was gone and I worry about him.
Pil's been on anti-biotics and anti-inflammatories for a week (vet bill last week was about £50 iirc), because he had made a mess biting his leg and making it raw and infected.
I'm wondering if it's connected with bad joints or something. He's very clicky and the breed's prone to arthritis.
Anyway, night before last I watched from upstairs whilst he went down the stairs in the half light. He went down them almost crablike, really carefully, and seemed to be having difficulty bending his rear right leg. Today I was stroking him and messing about and noticed a swelling on his right leg, like a spongy mass around the side of his ankle joint. Different leg to the one with the infection.
J gave me some cash the other day (£100) 'cause he'd got paid and I'd helped out a bit when he was broke last month and I went and put it into the bank thereby avoiding going over my overdraft limit. I was £12 away from going over.
I could really do without a bunch of vet bills right now. I was just starting to think I might actually manage to buy a few presents lol. Anyway, much as the vet bills are worrying me, mainly I'm fretting over Pil. It's an unwanted reminder that at 10 years old, he's on the wrong the side of the hill.
He's been struggling with the stairs for a while now, and getting up and lying down is sometimes a little more effort than it once was. It's gonna floor me when I lose him, I know it. He's the first dog I've raised. He's my little wolf.
Aw hon, I'm so sorry. Give Pilau some huggles from me. :(
Oh ba. I'm so sorry.
I have ral concerns bout Diz's health right now. Added to issues about how he's coping with the move.
Imagine this - you move into a place with your GF. She's always taken care of you before. But this new place - you're not sure about. People seem to wander in and out. You wake up the first morning, some bitch has sprayed graffiti all over the place! Every day it's the same! You never see her, but it's everywhere!
Well. That's kinda how Diz feels.
And I feel like I might have to give him away. And tonight, being alone (my parents are aways) it's making me cry. But I know this is about my survival, not his. Dani will know. Dani met him.
Oh chaps I am so unhappy.
Feel a bit grim.
Deserve to.
Have had a bottle of vodka today if you count 24 hours.
In fact if you count 24 hours it's been about 30 units (max advised for a man a week is 21)
Parents away, not sure what to do
I know they are worried about me
I know they have spirits hidden in their room (I thought Dads was sneaking one, but he was so inept I realised it was for Mum). And Mum went in "my" room to put something away last night and there were 2 beer bottles and 1/2 a bottle of vodka - she's nor blind.
I know they're looking out for me, but I don't know what to do. I have 3/4 glass vodka & diet coke and have thrown up twice. Good! Can drink more! Still burping up haddock from 17.00.
Woke up at about 04.00. Had Toffee Caramel vodka drink. Dozed off til Diz woke me up. And again. And again. And again. Started to drink Strawberry & Cream vodka drink at about 06.00. Finished off very good book (translated from Japanese; very bleak). Then started on half bottle of vodka (before shower). Has gone on from there.
See? Hardly worth saving, right? If you saw me on Jerry Springer you'd be booibng me, right?
Going to bed with the remains of the new bottle I bought today. At least the mixer was De-Caff :) This will really humiliate me tomorrow. Good. I have a glass to drink and I know I will despite my raw throat. And I have to get up about 08.30 (GMT) to get rid of the evidence. But I am being honest. I'd almost rather puke.
It's a pukey post anyway.
Shit. Am seriously weighuing up - go to bed (rub dirt in ot and suck it up) or go to A&E and tell them how scared I am.
Suck it up I reckon. I mean if it's even an option (with apostrophes!) it's not that bad, right? Having to revise it is just Friday night drunkenness. OMG - what if they just put me in with the drunks?
Shit - I hear Diz shouting at Mia (cats) between the doors. Still thinking.
(A&E = UK Accident & Emergency)
SG, just sleep it off. Discuss it in the morning. We'll be here.
You know I was all up for going - I had my clothes on & everything. I felt I needed an answer,
Then I read your post and now I am not sure.
I really was seconds away from calling a taxi...
I called an alcohol helpline - she seemed baffled as to why I called,
Maybe you're right. Maybe it's a problem for another day
Wake up and hide the evidence again
No advice, just want you to know I am sending you thoughts and love from across the pond. We all fuck up now and then. If I was there, I'd hold your hair back for ya, make you drink a big glass of water, then tuck you in. :)
I second what UT says. Go to bed and make decisions with a clear head. you can't make good decisions when you've been drinking, no matter how seasoned you are.
Am interested to find I threw up twice. Will have to go check the toilets just in case.
I went to A&E.
After waiting for 2 hours to be seen, the doctor advised me he was going to call the Crisis Team. Yeah, they really helped last time I was suicidal - called me on my landline 24 hours after my GP advised them I was alone and afraid and felt unable to go home.
Meh - you get what you pay for.
In the end I walked out. Shoulda listened to UT and just slept it off (as I intend to now, £10 poorer in taxi fares).
I shoulda asked them to breathalyse me. I reckon it would have been a record. But because I presented myself (yes I heard the whole conversation) they didn't think I was in any danger. Not that I'm boasting - if I could drink less I'd be a much happier person.
Right.
Sort life out.
Tomorrow.
Sorry - today.
13 December is turning point for me. No more unhappy.
Thanks for being there people. I appreciate it.
SG, you know your parents know. Can you try to let them in to help? They want to so badly but they respect your pride too much to just wade in. You could do with some good friends on hand right now, and there are times when your parents can be good friends and I suspect this may be one of those times for you.
Ah, I have this issue with my Mum.
All through my childhood and especially those painful teenage years she would throw any confidences back at me when I was at my lowest.
"Look at the state of your room! No wonder Julie didn't want to be your partner in Drama!"
[Situation created for example - everyone wanted to be my partner in Drama because I wasn't cool but I was a good actress. For a 14 year old.]
If I let her in now, I risk being hurt really, really badly. I'd prefer tp dance around the elephant for a while. Who knows, maybe I can just wish it away. I have a feeling my parents would prefer that too.
What about just your dad?
....can you explain to him why you're afraid of letting your mum in?
You know as well as I do you're not drinking to feel good, you're drinking to feel bad... punishment. Knock it the fuck off. :eyebrow:
Oh chaps I am so unhappy.
Feel a bit grim.
Deserve to.
Have had a bottle of vodka today if you count 24 hours.
In fact if you count 24 hours it's been about 30 units (max advised for a man a week is 21)
I'm not going to preach, just make an observation. It is all the rage now to re-learn how to drink. This assumes that alcohol isn't completely toxic to us. I still have a little voice in my head that says I could learn to drink reasonably. In my case, that voice is a cruel deceiver.
Good for you Griff that "little deceiver" is to me, also known as the voice of addiction. Do not listen.
....Wake up and hide the evidence again
This is the sentence that gives me the chills, SG. What sort of "again" is that? Again like last night? Again like the last time the parents were away? Again like last Friday? Again like the last time life spiralled down into depression?
How can we help you to stop doing it again? How can you help yourself to stop? Because you know you can stop, and you are worth helping.
Back in the land of the living.
Sigh.
Going to really work at it this time.
If I'm not constantly ashamed of my behaviour maybe I can let my family in more genuinely. I do love them, we are close, but the dancing around doesn't help.
Well - it would if it were literal - exercise!
And that's what I'm going to do tomorrow - get out and have a good long walk. I'll come back soggy, mind - we're having torrential downpours here at the moment.
Sundae--if it helps any, I was on a three day binger from tuesday until friday. i called the AA helpline,, my mom and dad (I spent last night at their house so if I had a seizure they would be there to take me to ER) and yeah, today sucks, but I'm not drinking today. Oh, and I had about a pint of vodka every hour or two. from tues to friday. Yeah, the withdrawal was insane. I love you. I am here for you,, such as my self is of any help. you are NOT alone.
Please keep it together ladies. This is the worst time of year, but you can see it through. We all care about you very much. g
Back in the land of the living.
Sigh.
Going to really work at it this time.
If I'm not constantly ashamed of my behaviour maybe I can let my family in more genuinely. I do love them, we are close, but the dancing around doesn't help.
Well - it would if it were literal - exercise!
And that's what I'm going to do tomorrow - get out and have a good long walk. I'll come back soggy, mind - we're having torrential downpours here at the moment.
Sometimes a walk in a filthy downpour is great as long as you've a warm house and dry clothes to come home to.
As Griff said, it is a tough time of year for all sorts of reasons and being out of work in winter really Really REALLY
REALLY sucks. Try to get yourself a routine going SG - exercise, go to library for a scour of the job pages, or just a good read, is there anywhere you can volunteer (I know you've considered this) ... Hang in there SG - we're all here for you.
And Bri - good on you for calling on the resources you've got - that's a hard decision to make.
:grouphug: to you both.
[SIZE="1"]did I say the jobless thing really sux?[/SIZE]
SG, Bri, I'd suggest nude self photography as an excellent substitute for vodka. I have lots of room on my PC to store them for you.
The next few weeks are the roughest for those of us that are alone, even, or maybe expecially, in the midst of holiday festivities. Don't lose sight of the fact that you are important to someone... you are needed... you are loved.
Yes, you really are. :queen:
You are all important and if you could, I'd have all you lonely Christmas people to my place for lunch.
I hate people being alone on that day. Honestly. I'd even love to have you over if you weren't so far away Bruce. ;)
You are all important and if you could, I'd have all you lonely Christmas people to my place for lunch.
I hate people being alone on that day. Honestly. I'd even love to have you over if you weren't so far away Bruce. ;)
Do any of those lonely people have names or is this just a world wide magnanimous gesture? I have a name but I would rather come for dinner. thanks
[COLOR=black]
HUGZ FOR SG AND BRI[/COLOR]
Pretty much anyone really.
I think if Dazza and I can accomodate my ex on the day after all the crap he's put me and by association him through, I think we can accomodate anyone. :)
It's not a good day to be alone. Much better spent in the company of people who will help you through it.
I was pretty careless and lost this weekend...is it the season? Loneliness, boredom, being with a "friend" who I don't hang out with like I used to because my entire purpose in her life is to tell her how great she is, after she tells me how great she is...blah. Self-destructive behaviors, subseqent depression, asking why.
Girls, we will be OK. OK? OK!
Many virtual hugs.
It finally hit me last night that my grandmother, who died in February, will not be here for the holidays. I spent a good hour sobbing and wishing there was something I could do to bring her back. She was like the anchor for all of the good holiday memories I had for the first 20 years of my life, and it just broke my heart to realize that I won't be calling her on Christmas morning to send my love. :(
SG, Bri, I'd suggest nude self photography as an excellent substitute for vodka. I have lots of room on my PC to store them for you.
The next few weeks are the roughest for those of us that are alone, even, or maybe expecially, in the midst of holiday festivities. Don't lose sight of the fact that you are important to someone... you are needed... you are loved.
Yes, you really are. :queen:
As a professional photographer and artist, I have to with Bruce here. In fact, I am thinking that a few of us here at the cellar should start a pool to buy you a webcam so we can offer tips and suggestions during your photo shoot. You know, lighting, props, camera angles. Strictly above board and in the name of art.:D
Bruce, Elspode, Lookout??? Anyone? Bueller?
... being with a "friend" who I don't hang out with like I used to because my entire purpose in her life is to tell her how great she is, after she tells me how great she is...blah. Self-destructive behaviors, subseqent depression, asking why.
I used to have the very same friend.
Hugs to you.
Choco--I'm so sorry for your loss. This time of year can be really good and really bad at the same time. Hugs, hugs, all round.
and foot? thanks for the offer, but...I'm a crone! A CRONE i tell ya!
It finally hit me last night that my grandmother, who died in February, will not be here for the holidays. I spent a good hour sobbing and wishing there was something I could do to bring her back. She was like the anchor for all of the good holiday memories I had for the first 20 years of my life, and it just broke my heart to realize that I won't be calling her on Christmas morning to send my love. :(
I miss my grandmother and grandfather, too. Sometimes I visit their graves using the bookmarked locations at GoogleEarth. Perhaps a remembrance (poinsettia for her grave marker?) tradition for the departed will help you. Peace.
It finally hit me last night that my grandmother, who died in February, will not be here for the holidays. I spent a good hour sobbing and wishing there was something I could do to bring her back.
Sorry to hear that, Choco. My maternal grandma used to send me an ornament every year, along with a few little odds and ends wrapped in a particular unique way. The first Christmas I didn't get her package in the mail I felt so empty and lonely. I still cry a few tears when I hang the ornaments on the tree and this was the 7th Christmas without her.
::hugs::
What's upsetting me today?
Other people being upset over the people they don't have with them this Christmas. I think we've probably all got someone we miss desperately on days like that, but my trick is to be grateful for all the loved ones I do have with me.
I've come to think that missing people on special days is just a part of what makes the day itself special. Taking a moment to reflect on all they have meant and still mean to our lives and just having a quiet drink and toasting all the wonderful memories they've left you with.
Imagine life without those.
Just got back from my game which was fun. Unfortunately found out that one of my old teammates (from the coed league) had a double mastectomy last week. She "didn't want to be a bother" so NO ONE beyond her husband knew. 35 years old, serious athlete, and new mother. we're all kind of in shock.
Just got back from my game which was fun. Unfortunately found out that one of my old teammates (from the coed league) had a double mastectomy last week. She "didn't want to be a bother" so NO ONE beyond her husband knew. 35 years old, serious athlete, and new mother. we're all kind of in shock.
Doesn't that "didn't want to be a bother" thing SUCK??
Please remember folks - your friends and family want to know, want to help, want to show they care.
Sending healing vibes via you to her.
It finally hit me last night that my grandmother, who died in February, will not be here for the holidays. I spent a good hour sobbing and wishing there was something I could do to bring her back. She was like the anchor for all of the good holiday memories I had for the first 20 years of my life, and it just broke my heart to realize that I won't be calling her on Christmas morning to send my love. :(
Sorry Choc. Some kind of formal remembrance of her might be appropriate. Maybe everyone saying what they most loved about her.:sniff:
Doesn't that "didn't want to be a bother" thing SUCK??
Please remember folks - your friends and family want to know, want to help, want to show they care.
As someone who has perpetual "didn't want to be a bother" syndrome, I can tell you that it's more about avoiding the attention in the first place. If you show your care in more understated ways rather than talking about it, simply
do the helpful thing rather than ask "What can I do?," then you are more likely to be let in the loop. Just sayin'.
Playing games with the system.
GPs in Aylesbury won't register me without photo ID.
I technically possess it, but I don't have it to hand.
I lost my driving licence and passport about 5 years ago.
Called up to get a replacement driving licence (£17.50, not so bad - passport is going to be more I think) and it will take 15 working days. That's three weeks even before you take off postage time, and three Bank Holidays in between.
I don't have enough anti-depressants to last three weeks.
This is a frustration of my own making - I should have replaced my driving licence years ago. I should have tried to register with a new GP the Monday morning after I moved here. I should have checked my medication before I started to see the bottom of the pill bottle.
The only minor defence I can offer is that I have registered at 3 different practices in my life and have never been asked for photo ID. I certainly have never been told, "No photo ID, no registration".
Have contacted an NHS helpline. See if they can do anything for me.
Thing is, I can't even just pop to A&E to see a doctor (the usual fallback, even though it costs the NHS a lot of money) because no emergency doctor is going to give me a 30 day prescription on my say-so. At least not without a fight.
I really make my own problems.
Still, I haven't had a drink since Friday.
No photo ID no registration? That's awful. What if you don't drive and don't have a passport (like me)? That's totally screwy.
Sundae--quit beating yourself up. It doesn't help. Ok, so you didn't get your license in a timely manner. Ok. Now we have to go to plan B. You might have to go to the ER and just SEE what happens when you tell them your story. maybe they will be able to help you out; maybe not, but you have to try. this is no time for us to be circling the drain----you need to act while you still have a choice (not drunk, not do depressed you can't move, etc) I have a bad habit of doing this myself----making no choice until the choice is forced (and the forced choice always sucks, right?) There must be some way. Is your family a help at all? what about some AA people?
I want you to know that I am going thru the very same thing. My last drink was friday, too. I had a bender and wound up pretty sick. I HAVE to go to meetings. They are the only thing that helps me stay away from alcohol. Oh, god, Sundae. I wish I could help.
*powerless*
That sucks guys! I wish the best for you in your endeavors. It really isn't a good idea to beat yourself up. Try talking to yourself with the nice, caring, and kind voice. The world can naturally beat you up, and you are supposed to be nice to yourself, and understanding.
Take the same compassion you have for others, and try applying that to yourself sometime. I am not suggesting that you wallow in pity, but for heaven's sake, don't live in shame.
Why am I saying this? Because I can apply it to myself, as I look around, and my bedroom is disorganized. I decided that I am a piece of low class shit, then I realized that I had just worked for 2 days at 13 hours a day, with a fever. Then I decided that I am a badass. (and still trying to get over this cold, flu, whatever this is)
It's a matter of a little change in perspective. Give yourself the same humanization you would give others. You aren't any less because you know yourself really well. Just think about it for a minute and you may see yourself in a different light.
Sundae--quit beating yourself up. It doesn't help. Ok, so you didn't get your license in a timely manner. Ok. Now we have to go to plan B. You might have to go to the ER and just SEE what happens when you tell them your story. maybe they will be able to help you out; maybe not, but you have to try. this is no time for us to be circling the drain----you need to act while you still have a choice (not drunk, not do depressed you can't move, etc) I have a bad habit of doing this myself----making no choice until the choice is forced (and the forced choice always sucks, right?) There must be some way. Is your family a help at all? what about some AA people?
I want you to know that I am going thru the very same thing. My last drink was friday, too. I had a bender and wound up pretty sick. I HAVE to go to meetings. They are the only thing that helps me stay away from alcohol. Oh, god, Sundae. I wish I could help.
*powerless*
Bri, you're not powerless. What you say is such a good message.
SG, listen up to Bri - get down to A&E and see what they say NOW not when you're on the last antidepressant and it's Xmas eve. Do you have any other ID at all SG, even without a photo?
Hugs to the both of youse [proper Scots word, that!].
Oh, and what Cic said, too!
As someone who has perpetual "didn't want to be a bother" syndrome, I can tell you that it's more about avoiding the attention in the first place. If you show your care in more understated ways rather than talking about it, simply do the helpful thing rather than ask "What can I do?," then you are more likely to be let in the loop. Just sayin'.
[SIZE="1"](sorry for the multipost)[/SIZE]
yabbut ... how can we know something's wrong if you don't tell us? Isn't it human nature to show you I care more if I think you're in trouble than if I think you're doing OK (that is "show you " more, not "care" more)?
Sure, it's human nature, but that doesn't mean the person has to like being the recipient of pity or special treatment, even if it's what you want to give them. It's also human nature to avoid situations that make us uncomfortable. I'm just saying, if you have a friend or family member who routinely avoids telling people about their personal struggles, then when you do find out about it, the appropriate response is to give them a hug, and change the subject in a timely manner. Later you can bring them flowers or food or whatever you want, just do it in a discreet and matter-of-fact way: "we're helping you because that's what people do for each other, and it's no big deal," rather than "your life is obviously really, really terrible right now, so you deserve some stuff."
Doesn't that "didn't want to be a bother" thing SUCK??
Please remember folks - your friends and family want to know, want to help, want to show they care.
Sending healing vibes via you to her.
Sure, it's human nature, but that doesn't mean the person has to like being the recipient of pity or special treatment, even if it's what you want to give them. It's also human nature to avoid situations that make us uncomfortable. I'm just saying, if you have a friend or family member who routinely avoids telling people about their personal struggles, then when you do find out about it, the appropriate response is to give them a hug, and change the subject in a timely manner. Later you can bring them flowers or food or whatever you want, just do it in a discreet and matter-of-fact way: "we're helping you because that's what people do for each other, and it's no big deal," rather than "your life is obviously really, really terrible right now, so you deserve some stuff."
Point taken. "Show you care" should suit the recipient more than the giver.
For the record, I found some more anti-depressants.
I didn't mean to create drama - I am genuinely happy and relived not to have to get confrontational (with the NHS) over this.
Posted in the happy thread :)
It's a matter of a little change in perspective. Give yourself the same humanization you would give others. You aren't any less because you know yourself really well. Just think about it for a minute and you may see yourself in a different light.
I needed to hear just that. Great post.
Well I am glad someone was listening. ;)
I'm a little upset b/c I'm worried about Big Sarge :(
One of the first grade teachers at Lil Lookout's school has taken it upon themselves to announce in class that there is no santa claus. she went on to explain that parents set up all the toys and eat the cookies so kids think there will be a santa. WTF!?!
This wasn't LL's teacher (he's in second) but all of the students from this class promptly spread the word at recess. and more than a few went home and spilled it in front of younger brothers and sisters.
I'm seriously pissed off about this. LL came to the conclusion on his own a while back that he knows some people don't believe in Santa but he is going to because he thinks Christmas is more fun that way. Nothing was ruined for my kid but I'm still pissed. Who does this bitch think she is?
Well, they would have found out from the Ouija board sooner or later.
That would prompt a call from me to an administrator.
Oh and she'd believe in Santa after seeing the 50 tons of deer shit her car was buried in. :)
One of the first grade teachers at Lil Lookout's school has taken it upon themselves to announce in class that there is no santa claus.
...
Nothing was ruined for my kid but I'm still pissed. Who does this bitch think she is?
Unbelievable. You should involve the principal. That's treading on the parents' role. She has absolutely no right. Not her place.
I'm a little upset b/c I'm worried about Big Sarge :(
Me too. I pmed him yesterday but he's still not been seen online since
this post.
Anyone know where he is, physically?
Well, that's one teacher that won't be getting too many Chrissy pressies from the kids' parents then.
I too am worried about Big Sarge. I didn't like the sound of that last "bye". I hope he is okay, maybe just taking some time off/out/away.
This sort of thing is yet another reason why I detest war and see it as an absolute last resort. I wonder how many other people there are in situations like his - got back physically in one piece, but with his life torn up. I wish I could help him.
One of the first grade teachers at Lil Lookout's school has taken it upon themselves to announce in class that there is no santa claus .... Who does this bitch think she is?
I'm as happy as the next person (probably more so) to engage in teacher-bashing, but I'd need to know the context before I would jump on this one.
K-1st-2nd grades are the years that kids figure it out on their own, the ones with older sibs sometimes hear about it sooner and like to enlighten their classmates, this has been going on forever.
If the teacher was put on the spot or called upon to settle an argument, wtf was she supposed do - lie? If that's not what happened, I'm supposed to believe she just decided to set the record straight for a room full of santa believers out of nowhere? I'm struggling with that.
I'm a little upset b/c I'm worried about Big Sarge :(
Me too. I pmed him yesterday but he's still not been seen online since this post.
I saw him online earlier today - I im-ed him, but he didn't respond.
Question for Brianna - is Big Sarge OK?
What's upsetting me?
My stomach. it's extremely unhappy with me.
I'm floundering on my dissertation. I'm all over the place and I think I've chosen a topic that is conceptually challenging to a dangerous degree. This might be where I crash and burn.
I am vascillating between the above thought and periods of confidence. I keep scaring the shit out of myself with how much fucking reading I have to do and how lost I am in how to bring this all together. I have to effectively teach myself the rudiments of a new language (the language of Sentiment and Sensibility and all its subtly gendered nuances. I know the Eng Lit gals will probably recognise this.) More to the point the primary source material is a real mixed bag. Some of it (like Hannah More's Cheap repository Tracts) is brilliant, i can read it all day and come up with a ton of ideas. Some of it though I just find my brain shuts down when I try to read it. I spent my college days avoiding the romantics and their precursors like the plague. What the fuck was I thinking?
*blinks*
That probably should have been in the mildly irritating thread come to think about it.
Glad to hear Sarge was spotted. I hope he's ok.
oh and Steve, I may not be sorry about your finger but I am sorry about your stomach :P Hope it passes quickly (if you'll pardon the pun).
I'm as happy as the next person (probably more so) to engage in teacher-bashing, but I'd need to know the context before I would jump on this one.
K-1st-2nd grades are the years that kids figure it out on their own, the ones with older sibs sometimes hear about it sooner and like to enlighten their classmates, this has been going on forever.
If the teacher was put on the spot or called upon to settle an argument, wtf was she supposed do - lie? If that's not what happened, I'm supposed to believe she just decided to set the record straight for a room full of santa believers out of nowhere? I'm struggling with that.
what she said. We demand that our teachers do not indulge in any spiritual teaching ...just cold hard facts. I'm guessing we would not be overly pleased if our kids came home refusing to tread on cracks in the pavement in case they kill their mothers because the teacher said it would..... Santa is seen as a christian thing here -most Jewish kids don't get visited by Santa -how the heck is a teacher supposed to handle that? "Well yes, he's real, but only for nice Christian children?"
We train children to believe the little lies of childhood, so they will be better at believing the big lies of the adult world.
Just something I heard somewhere once. It seems a bit cynical but I thought I'd throw it in.
Question for Brianna - is Big Sarge OK?
I don't know. I haven't seen/heard from him. I am feeling worried like everyone.
If the teacher was put on the spot or called upon to settle an argument, wtf was she supposed do - lie?
how the heck is a teacher supposed to handle that? "Well yes, he's real, but only for nice Christian children?"
The teacher should say "Ask your parents. We don't teach about Santa in school."
How 'bout, "Kids, no Santa appears in the curriculum. Now, we'd better get going unless you want Chinese overlords!"
That oughta get the lil bastards moving.
I don't know. I haven't seen/heard from him. I am feeling worried like everyone.
But what does the Ouija say?
How 'bout, "Kids, no Santa appears in the curriculum. Now, we'd better get going unless you want Chinese overlords!"
Ah-ah-ahh-ah, ah-ah-ahh-ah
We come from the land of the Rice and snow
from the Rising sun where the sweat shops sew
How crisp your bills, so green
could not elect Al Gore,
and now we'll calm
the tides of war
We are your overlords![youtube]ApxnAr6pRt0[/youtube]
I slept through an early morning call today, but Mum didn't. Well, she goes to bed earlier than me, doesn't wear earplugs and has the phone by the side of her bed!
The husband of one of her oldest friends died just after 06.00 this morning. He'd been in hospital for two months and they'd only just managed to diagnose him - complications in the brain following years of immuno-suppressant drugs to manage his rheumatoid arthiritis. The slow diagnosis isn't because they're slack (he was at the country's leading brain injury/ disease hospital in Oxford, luckily only 20 miles away) but because there was so much to rule out. In the end his heart just gave out.
Mum was over at Maureen's comforting her today, so even if we'd had no human feeling it would have affected Dad & me. Truth is I didn't care much for them (just in a child looking at her parents' friends kinda way I mean) but I've been hearing about the whole situation since I arrived. They've driven her to hospital a number of times (she hates dual carriageways and driving in the dark) and Mum also went with her on the bus and again when her son drove them - he doesn't live in the area so couldn't go every day.
She was Mum's first friend when Mum moved from London to Aylesbury. Maureen had done the same thing (there was an active campaign to fill up the towns in those days). Colin was a year older than my Dad, Craig - the son - a year younger than me, but married and with children.
Well, that's Christmas screwed for the next few years, at least for M & C.
And Colin had only just retired as well.
I am so lucky in comparison, I gave my Dad a kiss on the cheek when I got up and heard the news. He didn't ask why. I assume he knew.
April and I have officially decided to move in with her mom at the end of January. We were originally gonna do it in November, but her mom offered to pay 2 extra months of rent due to lack of space at her place at the time, and the hope that one of us would find a real job.
Nothing will prevent this move now...not even if both of us got jobs tomorrow. We're almost out of savings, so the primary goal is to replenish that and then some. I'm not keen on living with my mother-in-law, but she's cool...and it'll have to do for now.
I slept through an early morning call today, but Mum didn't. Well, she goes to bed earlier than me, doesn't wear earplugs and has the phone by the side of her bed!
The husband of one of her oldest friends died just after 06.00 this morning. He'd been in hospital for two months and they'd only just managed to diagnose him - complications in the brain following years of immuno-suppressant drugs to manage his rheumatoid arthiritis. The slow diagnosis isn't because they're slack (he was at the country's leading brain injury/ disease hospital in Oxford, luckily only 20 miles away) but because there was so much to rule out. In the end his heart just gave out.
Mum was over at Maureen's comforting her today, so even if we'd had no human feeling it would have affected Dad & me. Truth is I didn't care much for them (just in a child looking at her parents' friends kinda way I mean) but I've been hearing about the whole situation since I arrived. They've driven her to hospital a number of times (she hates dual carriageways and driving in the dark) and Mum also went with her on the bus and again when her son drove them - he doesn't live in the area so couldn't go every day.
She was Mum's first friend when Mum moved from London to Aylesbury. Maureen had done the same thing (there was an active campaign to fill up the towns in those days). Colin was a year older than my Dad, Craig - the son - a year younger than me, but married and with children.
Well, that's Christmas screwed for the next few years, at least for M & C.
And Colin had only just retired as well.
I am so lucky in comparison, I gave my Dad a kiss on the cheek when I got up and heard the news. He didn't ask why. I assume he knew.
[SIZE=2]Sundae Girl[/SIZE] - My heart is out to you.
April and I have officially decided to move in with her mom at the end of January. We were originally gonna do it in November, but her mom offered to pay 2 extra months of rent due to lack of space at her place at the time, and the hope that one of us would find a real job.
Nothing will prevent this move now...not even if both of us got jobs tomorrow. We're almost out of savings, so the primary goal is to replenish that and then some. I'm not keen on living with my mother-in-law, but she's cool...and it'll have to do for now.
It could be tough. Maybe you can work out some ground rules early so you don't go through the room-mate training period. You can handle it bro.
We've pretty much already laid down the ground rules. My mother-in-law is pretty decent...she just has some neuroses like the rest of us. My only real concern is just keeping Mrs. Syc's spirits up. She keeps trying to put the blame for this situation on herself, even though we both decided it was a good idea for her to leave her last job...plus we knew it could come to this.
On the upside, it'll be much easier to record music for the band, since my mother-in-law has a Mac with Garageband.
Mum.
Specifically Mum with Dad.
She told me tonight that if she had the money she would leave him tomorrow.
I'm sure this is not really the case, but I hate this nasty and spiteful side of her. This was all about Dad forgetting to pick up her de-caffeinated Diet Cokes to take to my sister's house. She made nasty comments all evening and even now when we're back she is still more or less ignoring him. I tried to calm her down and she snapped at me for trying to take his side and said, "If you don't like it that's tough shit."
I've come straight upstairs because I can't take her sniping - the things she says to him are far more disrespectful than him remembering to pick something up. If it was that goddamned important why didn't she handle it herself? She already says Dad has Alzheimers, is useless, only thinks of himself and never does anything right. Him forgetting has been taken as a personal insult, but she has hands of her own to pick the cokes up. And we stood waiting for the taxi for five minutes, if she's so organised how come she didn't check that the ONE bag my Dad was carrying, that obviously only held two selection packs, was somehow hiding a six pack of coke.
And don't think she suffered all noight - oh no. My BIL went to the local shop and bought replacement cans within 30 mins of us getting there. She had one and then went onto water, bitching about my Dad being pissed the rest of the night, when in fact it was about him not being able to hear the conversation. Did I mention he is supposed to wear a hearing aid and she's acted like this is a deliberate slight to her? She's having trouble behaving like a bitch about this since I've moved in because I have a slight hearing deficiancy too, and if my Mum started trying to put me down about it I'd fight back. I bite my tongue on a lot of things, but I won't be sneered at for something I genuinely cannot help. And neither should Dad.
She went into a spite-fest on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. In the first it was because Dad picked up a towel she's dropped on the floor and started drying up with it. It was dirty, Dad didn't notice. Well, silly old fool of course. But if Dad had just dropped a towel and Mum had picked it up, he'd have been in the wrong. Anyway, she went back to when Dad was 20 for that insult. Apparently it was the sort of dirty thing the Robinsons did in the house he grew up in. No wonder he and his brother (now dead) got TB.
On Christmas Day, Dad knocked the salt cellar out of the cupboard. An accident, could have happened to anyone. Oh no, it was all to do with Dad's clumsiness and how he didn't care about living in a dirty house. Odd, because when Mum smashed her own wine glass full of wine the other year it was our fault for crowding her in the kitchen, despite the fact we were performing our well-choreographed dance as kitchen helpers and were nowhere near the wine glass at the time. It was just another accident.
I hate it.
And when she's like this I hate her.
And this will be damned hard to get out of my head.
I'm not playing the lottery again while I live under their roof.
Sorry, I'm so angry right now.
I'm sure you can tell.
But I will swallow it and go downstairs and walk on eggshells because that's the only thing that will make my Dad's life easier.
If it wasn't for the fact she keeps the place both spotless and organised I'd wish her dead tomorrow.
Don't really mean it. Just fed up. And shocked she could say something that nasty about Dad.
I'm less angry this morning.
Sad and disappointed, but at least I had the sense to back off and bring all my fury here.
Thanks.
April and I have officially decided to move in with her mom at the end of January. We were originally gonna do it in November, but her mom offered to pay 2 extra months of rent due to lack of space at her place at the time, and the hope that one of us would find a real job.
Nothing will prevent this move now...not even if both of us got jobs tomorrow. We're almost out of savings, so the primary goal is to replenish that and then some. I'm not keen on living with my mother-in-law, but she's cool...and it'll have to do for now.
Sorry to hear that. I wouldn't wish moving in with a mother in law on anyone.
Funeral home tonight. My friend, who I told you about, passed away the morning of the 26th.
Never was there a kinder man: a good father, a smiley guy, a funny guy, a talented guy.
I was thinking about him as I drove to my parents on Sunday, and the song Tusk (Fleetwood Mac) came on. Something about that song, the drums perhaps, reminded me of the old days and he and my ex in the band and the fun (I've known his wife since we were kids, and her mom was even my supervisor one summer at my strawberry-picking job) times, watching their girls grow up, and I was so very sad.
So sad, this world sometimes.
*Frowns and hugs Shawnee* The world is sad sometimes. My condolences, Shawnee; it's hard to lose a friend.
Thanks Dana. Wife and daughters were in good spirits, considering. I think visitations are hard on the family, and it was 4 hours long. When I left about 7 there was still a really long line.
I told Wife, as we hugged and cried (just not using names here) that she has always been a strong woman, and she replied that I wouldn't want to see her when she's home. Still, I am amazed at human resiliency.
Daughters are beautiful and sweet young ladies...hard to believe the youngest used to follow me wherever I went (I played games with her, danced with her...great kid.)
I saw a few people from the day and that was nice too. They had a video of pics of him and his family, and there was one pic of the old band...my ex goofing at the camera, everyone laughing. In that pic was another band member who passed a couple years ago; his death was sudden.
But the world is missing a very good man.
Car repossessed. :eek: :thepain2::cry:
Sorry LJ. I fucked up big time. I've been juggling all my bills since losing my job. I thought that particular ball was still up in the air. When I called they said they have to keep it since I'm unemployed and haven't communicated well with them.
:cry:
Sorry UT. I've been through that when I was underemployed....but when I gave the car back and they screwed me anyway. garnishment..... on my rinky retail job and my teaching assitant job...then I got this job and did a chapter 7. Had I known about chapter 11 I would have made those loan sharks take their money. Of which I had money just two weeks late.
This new car I bought from some good guys. He said he liked me and never worked harder at securing a car for a person and I had a really good job. I guess that's because my shoes didn't have holes in them. I was sitting with the other 'special loans' people so it's true.
so do not dispair. Things will turn around.
Anyway, I was going to say.....I know there was a thread about this but I couldn't find it.
I use my debit at gas stations. Once a month the charge will drop from my account. I always check my account balance online. I've bought a car so my balance has been low so what do you know? The charge will reappear once I have used the money and I am charged with a 35 dollar overdraft.
THEN I was charged with a continuous od charge of 5 dollars.
I called customer service and said I have only had one other overdraft since October for the very same reason due to the charge at the gas station or the bank dropping the charge. Of course this is my fault for not knowing I have a charge coming through that dosn't show up on my online usage list.
I told the guy I am not intentionally going out and making overdrafts...if he can notice it has been twice and only due to the gas station charges dropping and reappearing once my account is low. This is one day before payday. I said why the 5 dollar charge? He said it means I have left my account overdrawn too long. I said $1 and 18 cents for 24 hours? Yes he says. He sighs. He probably gets alot of complaints like this but it isn't right for banks to drop charges and then resubmit them. I bought gas on the 24th. It looked like it was processed. I bought a coffee on the 24th then on Friday and Saturday my account was ok then yesterday ,Monday I am overdrawn by a dollar and 18 cents. I am annoyed by the way banks earn their money by overdrafting yet make you feel as though you are not a good consumer to take advantage of banking institutions or at least that's the way I feel.
I am trying to beef up my economic standing and those dropped charges don't help much. From now on I'll pay the gas stations in cash.
sky---that has happened to me, too. They post and deduct the charge and then DROP it, THEN later, when there's no money, resubmit it. I don't understand this at all---but, of course, it's all about money. Banks are so sneaky and hateful. I go to a credit union now, but they've done the same thing---post it as paid charge, drop it, then repost it. very annoying.
UT--I'm so sorry about the whole car thing. Things are really sucking pretty bad. :(
Thanks bri- my misery loves company.
UT if respect and caring were money you'd be a pretty rich man here. :grouphug:
Holy shit UT! Now you don't have a car either. This must be catching like a bad flu.
Damn dammy!! I am going to shake my head. Then I'm going to shake it until life starts to make sense again. This could be awhile. *shakes head*
What Phenomenal horse-pucky.
Damn UT - that really suxorz!
UT, I recall you saying you moved to where you are because of your job...any way you can move back toward Center City? You don't need a car around here.
UT, that sucks. Sorry to hear things have been so close to the edge for you, man.
No, it's my fault. I can't believe how stupid I was about it. I could have juggled just a little differently. I thought I was juggling just fine -- thought I was getting good at it actually, and then the ball hits me square in the face.
I moved here in 1993. The house is now a sort of nightmare albatross. I can't get a loan from the equity I have in it, because my credit is now, well, I think my rating is into negative numbers. I can't afford to pay for the house even with J, because I don't make enough in unemployment. I get family loans/gifts to pay the mortgage. But I can't move, because A) now four people are dependent on it, B) it would be a terrible time to sell because of the market, C) it would be a terrible time to sell because it needs about $25K in repairs.
So the best recourse is to continue to job hunt and hopefully get a good job and get back on track.
Oh shit UT.
I know it means more to be carless in the US, so you have my complete and sincere sympathy.
Nothing I can say except that I understand how these things happen and you know that people come back from worse - I'm confident you will.
And for goodness sake take any help you are offered from people here who are able to offer more than words like me.
You're a good and decent man and although in the wider world that means nothing, it means a hell of a lot here.
Yeah, half the art of juggling is a steady line of banter. It gives the audience the feeling that you are relaxed and confident which is contagious.
The bright spot is with so many people in a bind now, in the future any blemishes on your credit rating will be forgiven more readily.
You're right though, getting a job looks like a better prospect than hitting the lottery, or finding a cure for cancer in the kitchen sink. This is another bump in the road. Your woman loves you, your dog loves you, we love you, you'll be ok. :thumb:
Sorry, UT. What's ironic, about the car thing, is that technically there is hardly ever something you actually need to physically go in to an office for; maybe to reboot a server or something. Regarding the being stuck in a house that needs thousand$ in repair, yeah. I know what that feels like. Hope you find something soon, horse dogg maniac.
Your woman loves you, your dog loves you, we love you, you'll be ok. :thumb:
Spot on. You'll grind it out brother.
I am sorry, UT. What a blister! But, don't be too upset with yourself over it. You have had a lot to juggle, lately, and there are only so many balls that can stay in the air at a time...be proud that you are able to keep some of them up.
There is always a way. we have been in bad bad credit situations and still been able to buy a car, one way or another. I am sure a solution will present itself. Chin up, friend.
Wow, that sucks UT. You have my sympathies. Hope you get mobile again soon.
Well. I did a sreach of pets and came here. Dotty tore off a claw today
Someone, need's To The art of search
I give up bb
Stomach flu.
Severe projectile vomiting and projectile diarrhea at the same time.
Never quite experienced this level of severity of those symptoms before.
The most horrible cleanup job at 3 am, ever.
I would not go in there yet. It still needs 24 hours and a program of bleach.
Well sheesh UT...do you plan to get a break sometime soon? (Shakes fist at air "leave him alonnnneee, you meanie gods."
Hope you feel better soon. :comfort:
I'm going to burn a New Years wish for UT tonight, too. He just stepped over the line. I'm doing it. :)
Stomach flu.
Severe projectile vomiting and projectile diarrhea at the same time.
Never quite experienced this level of severity of those symptoms before.
The most horrible cleanup job at 3 am, ever.
I would not go in there yet. It still needs 24 hours and a program of bleach.
um... yuck
Here this is funny. Not sure if anyone saw it the first time I posted it: maybe it will make you feel better. Now laff damn it!! Lafff! ;)
[youtube]uxkBYzkBnW8[/youtube]
I am better today but I had to put one of my big Rhodesians asleep 2 days ago. He was my best buddy of 8 years. It was one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. I really owed it to him. He developed acute CHF and was in failure. Friday to Monday he suffered. I woke up and knew what had to be done. There was no doubt and no choice. I cried like a baby at the time but it was a peaceful end for him. It is the part of dog ownership that is the hardest.
I'm sorry, merc. My heart goes out to you. :(
Oh Merc. That's so sad. How are the others coping?
It has been very tough on them. His brother knew something was wrong. Usually when one goes to the vet the other cries the whole time. This time not a whimper. His bro followed him around just keeping close during the weekend sensing something was very wrong. When I took him up and carried him to my truck, 110 pounds, he didn't even try to follow. It was heart breaking.
Ok I'm going to cry. Don't doo iit...don't do iiit...not gonna do it. I'm just not? That just makes me f'ing sad.
Ok I did. I cried.
I am sorry for your loss Merc. uugh. That hurtz.
So sorry Merc. It's such a hard decision to make. Hugs to you and yours.
And Pilau sends doggy love to the rest of the pack.
*hugs* sorry merc.
Here this is funny.
And in referring to wie- wiener poopy... my gosh.
Ut I'm bummin' about your [really cool]car and your being sick.
Merc, my condolences, good job being there for him though.
Imodium AD. Best OTC medication available. I'm thinking of taking it every day and just having one massive dump per week. How convenient that would be, as opposed to now which is one BR/WC visit per 15 minutes.
I got some amazing medication when I was in Spain. Seemed to be heavy on the opium derivative at least - it bunged me up like a cork and gave me the super-freakiest dreams I've ever had. And me being me, that's super-freaky.
Funny - I have a contraceptive implant for an equivilant reason that you're suggesting taking an anti-diuretic. There's no sperm to fertilise me, but I get it free and don't have to buy tampons/ towels. Saves me a fortune over 3 years. But if you have to buy Immodium, what would the trade-off be in the cost of TP?
Wait - you gave me an idea there. If I just put a tampon up my ass, would that solve things?
I'll replace it every hour.
Wait - you gave me an idea there. If I just put a tampon up my ass, would that solve things?
I'll replace it every hour.
:vomit:
When I was 17, someone shut my finger in a door jamb - they were "jokingly" trying to stop me coming into the room without realising I had my finger on the other side of the door.
POURED blood. All over his parents' carpet. Only time I've been glad to make a mess in my life I think.
I was driven to A&E by the least inebriated partier. It certainly wouldn't have been me - even if I'd had a licence. I was wearing a lace bra top and cami knickers - bless the eighties!
The nasty piece of work concerned came with us. Good. He was more worried about the amount of blood I was producing than the state of his parents' carpet - good. Served him right to get a scare. I bled through two tea-towels and he was much nicer to me after this event. (hold a grudge? Me? After 19 years? Well...)
Anyway, the point of this is that after X-ray (the top of my finger was broken), the nurse in A&E wrapped my finger in cotton wool before advising me to go to my GP in one weeks time and not take the bandage off in between.
When it finally came off, it had to be soaked in water with TCP, and each strand of cotton wool removed by tweezers, while I tried not to cry. The remaining nail had punctured the skin underneath, so it was a bleeding wound at the time it was bandaged.
The reason for this post?
UT - I envisage a similar situation if you use internal protection for a reason not specified on the packaging.
My Mum had to help me out in the end. I hope for KatKeeper's sake she does not end up in a similar position for you.
Beyond that, it wouldn't work anyway. There are no muscles forcefully expelling menstrual blood like you have with poop. A little wad of cotton would just come right back out with all the rest of it.
Imodium AD. Best OTC medication available. I'm thinking of taking it every day and just having one massive dump per week. How convenient that would be, as opposed to now which is one BR/WC visit per 15 minutes.
You really don't want to get that backed up, despite the apparently attractive convenience factor.
Right now I have to go to the pot and sit every time I FART, just in case.
How about one of those things the astronauts wear?
an "I poop at zero G" iron-on patch?
an "I poop at zero G" iron-on patch?
No, one of these:
... a bailing pump.
jesus, man. Wtf? No whistle? What kind of an emergency kit doesn't have a whistle? ...
oh hang on...doesn't need the whistle. Has tracking system.
A friend's dad had a seizure just after Christmas. Testing has revealed there are lesions in his frontal lobes that are likely cancer.
That is awful. Is it operable?
Sorry to hear that wolf, prayers to those involved.
That's awful, Wolf. Must be a nightmare for your friend.
Makes my little moan seem tiny. I have a cold. Yep. A cold. I'm bored with it now. The whole croaky lost voice thing was a novelty and going dizzy every time I stand up is interesting, but really, I'd like it all to fuck off now so I can concentrate on some work...
I know, it's pathetic. I'm being a sad little attention whore because I'm feeling poorly. My throat hurts like fuck every time I cough. And yet somehow this does not lead me to the obvious choice of not smoking...addiction, go figure. Oh and my eye sockets hurt. And cheekbones. And neck and chest and ribs.
I don't think it'd be making me so miz if it hadn't had a three week lead in...
On the plus side of course it's kept me from some of the more unhealthy excesses of Christmas. Yes, I've pigged, but nowhere near the amount I usually do. I haven't drank anywhere near what I normally drink either, so no bad thing.
To balance that out is the rather unexpected news that i have survived Christmas more or less intact and without crippling my finances.* Yey.
* 'Finances' seems a rather grand term for a few incoming cheques and the overdraft they feed.
Just the whole world. I haven't felt this sad for a long time, and I don't even know why I'm sad for sure.
Silly, I guess.
Actually, I'm stupid. Stupid stupid stupid. Seriously stupid.
Hugs. I know...
It isn't stupid, sometimes it's actually a reality we all face....Then we get over it.
Maybe I'll learn before I'm 50.
Trust No One.
--The X-files
Right now I have to go to the pot and sit every time I FART, just in case.
Welcome to my world (Crohn's disease).
Word to the wise -- don't guess wrong.
Our company is switching from twice-a-month paychecks to every-two-weeks paychecks this month. Which means of course that our paychecks will be smaller, and we will get less money per month until 3-paycheck July.
What really sucks is, we found out today that our first paycheck next week will be even smaller, because it will be for less days. Still not sure how that works out, and I'm too depressed right now to figure it out. They're going to advance me some to make up part of the difference, but then that has to be taken out of my next few checks until it's paid off. It was tight before as it was, but now...damn it all.
I am so sick and tired of being a broke-ass mofo...even if we are doing better than we were a year ago. We need to do moar better. :mad:
It ends up being the same money over the same time doesn't it? The checks will be smaller but more often.
Having worked under both systems, my personal preference was always bi-weekly. Having a paycheck every other Friday was awesome for working my budget and bills. The 1st and 15th didn't matter anymore.
Yes, but the switch from one to the other can be rough. Your expenses are still monthly--so until you get to the first "three paycheck" month, you'll be working with no buffer. If you make $50,000 a year, that translates to about $160 less per paycheck, i.e. $320 less per month until the magical extra paycheck comes in. If you have decent self-control and budgeting skills, you can then make that extra paycheck last until the next three-paycheck month, but not everyone has that. Most people just learn to live on the lower amount and treat the two extra paychecks as bonuses. I used to work for a company that did bi-weekly paychecks, and it was a huge pain in the ass.
I spent all day yesterday stressing myself out over my recent news to the point that I've exhausted myself. I knew I had when I started thinking about bed before 7pm yesterday.
Dazza seemed grumpy after dinner so I asked him what was wrong and he said he wanted me to stop stressing because it's upsetting everyone and it's making me ill. He told me I didn't realize how bad I was even and that I shouldn't be worrying so much even though he understood why and felt the same way in a man kind of way.
Today I am going to try and be more positive. All this negativity is definitely not working for me.
It's hard sometimes to get rid of irrational fears and worry. You know intellectually that it's almost certainly not a problem, right?
Yeah I do, and it shits me that I've lost control of my reason.
I'm gonna make a change though. I'm physically working on being conscious of every thought (if that's possible) and marshalling the dumb ones to the dunce corner for punishment.
Husband may be losing his job today...not sure but about 80% sure on it and just the idea of it is upsetting, since we are about to move again and I don't have a job. :(
I hope you're wrong case. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you all.
Thanks, Ali. I hope I am wrong too.
Ach damn, case, I hope you're wrong too. Keep us posted. And good luck.
we need some good news, people! YIKES!
husband didn't lose his job at the "special meeting" today. that's pretty good news. but there's always tomorrow.... 6,400 to go.... *sigh*
That is awful. Is it operable?
Still being determined. He's been moved from the hospital near his home to one in the City, which usually means "really scary" as far as prognosis is concerned. Last piece of info was probably not operable, but that didn't rule out other interventions. Finding out more day by day, really.
I spent all day yesterday stressing myself out over my recent news to the point that I've exhausted myself. I knew I had when I started thinking about bed before 7pm yesterday.
Dazza seemed grumpy after dinner so I asked him what was wrong and he said he wanted me to stop stressing because it's upsetting everyone and it's making me ill. He told me I didn't realize how bad I was even and that I shouldn't be worrying so much even though he understood why and felt the same way in a man kind of way.
Today I am going to try and be more positive. All this negativity is definitely not working for me.
Relax. It is almost over. Keep yourself busy.
It's hard to respond to just one trouble so I'll just say I wish the best outcomes for those who need one.
I understand about budget cuts. We are going through those as well. I understand about loss of income or reduction of work. I've been there and could be there in the future. Who knows what is in store. Just hold on.
Thankfully, false alarm for us!
yey! good news Case:)
Ditto! Great!!!!
Thanks! I feel better, now that I can breathe. I still am going to get a job, though, once we move again.
Move AGAIN ????
Chick WTF ??!!
I thought you guys just moved to that SWEET Mountin Challet !!
Yes, I know...it is WTF...now I am going to cry. :(
Srsly.
But actually, we do have to move for health and financial reasons.
Sorry to hear that case. Hope it all works out for you. It is just bricks and wood and nails and stuff. There will be another.
Thanks, Merc. Yes, you are right...its just a house. No big deal. And the packing is halfway done...because we never unpacked half our stuff!
Good luck and hang in there, case! :)
Sorry case. :(
It is definitely not what I would want for you guys. Maybe you guys could somehow make this a better opportunity for you both. I know. That sounds lame.
hugs.
Thanks, you guys. Yes, I know it will be a good opportunity. We will be closer to family and back close to a lot of my old friends. It will be nice to have some social interaction on a regular basis. The commute will be less hellish for husband and the house we are moving into is really pretty nice...not smoothmoniker/radar nice...nor is it case's cute chalet nice...just nice. It is also near a bunch of little lakes and a golf course, if you like that sort of thing.
sounds nice. Sorry you are losing the mountain retreat but this new place sounds more livable.
Thanks, Glatt. Yes, it is more livable.
Now I need to stop infecting this thread with my annoying whining and get back to packing!
Case, is your new house going to be in the Tequila's vicinity? We could meet for dinner so you can update me on your situation.
Fish tacos, mmm.
P.S. I don't think it's possible to infect this thread with whining.
Another close call: homegirl almost lost her job due to a clerical error...
PAGING MR. LOWRY...
Um.
The wife of my "friend" somehow got my name and number and called me and left a kinda slurry message on my machine. Something like, "you can keep him," and all but, hey! I don't want him! She's the game-keeper, not me!
Oops.
(waits for lashing from all the holier-than-thou cellarites with a cringed look on my face and my head in ready-to-duck mode)
Yikes. Be careful. Kick her in the cunt if you have to, say it was self defense...
Really though, be careful. Hell hath no fury and all.
Ouch Bri. That's way too serious for funland.
Bri. Be careful, k?
And remember we luv you.
Case, is your new house going to be in the Tequila's vicinity? We could meet for dinner so you can update me on your situation.
Fish tacos, mmm.
P.S. I don't think it's possible to infect this thread with whining.
No, actually, the new house is in Windsor. But, perhaps there will be a time when we can meet at Tequilas before we move. I am craving the fish tacos, now.
The Poo Poo Pee Pee Puppies... and by that I mean the boy child who has angry butt and is teathing which combined makes him ever so plesant to be around and the girl child who is potty training all over my floor.
Oh no, oh no, oh no!!!
I was on the phone with the wife telling her not to throw away her marriage and while I was talking to her, HE beeped in and said, "If I get divorced, can I move in with you? Some crazy shit is going on," and I'm like, OMG.
This guy CANNOT move in with me. WHAT should I do? Tell the wife he called me just now? Or hope nothing happens and they make up? (I told the wife nothing except he had called me...) Hoyboy.
I talked to my sponsor. I'm cool.
Wow - I'm having mixed feelings about this. I feel sad for you that you are dealing with such a negative effed up situation. I also have the "You gotta sleep in the bed you made" sort of feeling and I feel sad for the wife.
IIRC though, you knew he was married and your attitude about the whole situation was very different when it was all fun & games. Now that its real and "in your face" it sucks bigtime.
What do you do? I got no idea - Apparently you were "just having fun" - then tell him to go away, delete/block his #'s from your phones, apologize profusely to the wife & move to Budapest.
Are there kids involved? How long have you been seeing him? Does any of this matter, really? - I dunno - just trying to get a better overall picture of the situation.
@classicman.
This is not the professor guy, just in case you are mixed up.
This is a man I've known for about 10 years. I was dating him when he cheated on me and I was done with him. He then got married. We worked at the same place (tho far, far away from each other--like MILES away) but he could still (and did) come in to see me from time to time.
I moved. He found me. He called, he came over. I had no feelings for him and I still don't. Yeah, I had sex with him. Yeah, I shouldn't have. I didn't mean/want or intend the wife to find out but she did...NO KIDS involved.
I told her I will not see him again and I mean it. That doesn't mean he isn't seeing "girlfriends" all over the place, though. He's like that.
"If I get divorced, can I move in with you? Some crazy shit is going on that I'm the cause of, yet do not accept responsibility for."
fixed that for him
serial cheater, loves chaos, loves danger in his relationships, doesn't care who it hurts...
yeah, but I'm to blame for it just as much as him.
my sponsor said to write this down: DO NOT BOTHER ME AGAIN and then stick by it and try not to be such a chaotic woman myself. she's right.
If it hadn't been you, it would have been some other woman.
You should let the wife move in with you, and both of you tell him to get lost. :haha:
That's a point, is his wife hawt? Imagine how freaked he'd be? lol
Ok, levity aside... I have a poorly Pilau. I spent the first 45 minutes of my morning disinfecting large chunks of living room and kitchen.
It cannot possibly still smell of sick. It can't. I have liberally bathed swathes of house in strong disinfectant, handwashed covers, Febreze-sprayed furniture, opened doors and windows etc etc. Two other people have been to my house and they say they can't smell anything. Me? I can't get rid of the smell.
Anyway...more important than odours and disinfectants and clean-ups, is the Poorly Pilau. He's not a happy pup. He's clearly feeling better now than he was earlier because he's scouting for food. But he was pretty laissez-faire about the whole dinner thing until I brought out the chicken and rice about half an hour ago (poorly dog food). He had a tiny portion and he's been angling for more since.
Poor babes. He must have felt really rough last night. He'd been sick like six or seven times. Worst thing is, I heard him digging the carpet and generally mooching about the place in an unsettled fashion and I ignored him because I was half asleep. It's entirely possible at some point he's scratched on the front door and I've missed it.
Not an earth shattering level of upset I realise, but there we go.
Awwww, poor Pilau. Hug him for me. :(
but not too tightly. Poor guy.
:apaw: for Pilau
Hope he is feeling better soon
Well it upsets me Dana...oooh!
Get Better Soon Pilau! Poor Buddy!!
You'll be back into your snausages soon my friend...:)
yeah, but I'm to blame for it just as much as him.
my sponsor said to write this down: DO NOT BOTHER ME AGAIN and then stick by it and try not to be such a chaotic woman myself. she's right.
I'm torn on the blame part, I guess so, but HE is the married one, not you. Then again, you knew he was married...
Stick to the plan - He certainly isn't worth it. There are plenty of "free" fish in the sea for ya.
:fish: ?
Not really. I'm a One Wolf. I mean a Lone Woof...er, wolf.
Good wishes to all those who need good wishes, and lots of love for Pilau. I feel his pain!
I came into the ER Wednesday morning thinking I had some stress-induced indigestion, and as it turns out it was a little more serious and I'm going to end up having my gallbladder removed tomorrow morning. Being in the hospital sucks!
You don't need that pesky gallbladder anyway, Choc. Tell it good riddance for me.
gallbladder removals are pretty straight forward. My cousin had hers out and was at my wedding two days later.
You'll breeze through it choco. :)
Good wishes to all those who need good wishes, and lots of love for Pilau. I feel his pain!
I came into the ER Wednesday morning thinking I had some stress-induced indigestion, and as it turns out it was a little more serious and I'm going to end up having my gallbladder removed tomorrow morning. Being in the hospital sucks!
Good luck, get well soon!
Choco! I wish you the best of luck and a speedy recovery.
Good luck Choco, keep us posted.
I had mine out about 5 years ago -- I was sore for about a week, but everything was quite straightforward. Best wishes, Chocolatl!
Boyfriend and I just had our one year anniversary on the 13th, and he gave me a gorgeous pair of emerald earrings.
I just lost one :(
It's the first piece of jewelery I've ever received from a boyfriend.
Ouch choco. Good luck honey. Oh and Pilau sends his best wishes for a speedy recovery. He knows more than most the stress of having to go to the vets so he totally understands.
John Mortimer's passing.
And even more that I had to read about it here.
I had the news on this morning, and checked the headlines in the paper shop too.
Shame that it was a post here that informed me. Shame on them I mean.
I'll probably hear about it on tonight's news. It will soften my indignation, but not my sadness.
RIP John. I'm sorry I never wrote the letter that has been my intention since reading your autobiography in my early 20's. Maybe I'd better write to Barry Humphries after all.
Boyfriend and I just had our one year anniversary on the 13th, and he gave me a gorgeous pair of emerald earrings.
I just lost one :(
It's the first piece of jewelery I've ever received from a boyfriend.
Coincidentally, my girlfriend just lost the claddagh I gave her during the first few months of our relationship. She's devastated. I'm not. The thing was a meaningful part of our relationship but in no way defining. It'll turn up perhaps. Either way I'm giving her another ring in the next month or so (*hint*).
We'll hit the 2-year mark on the 13th of April.
...Either way I'm giving her another ring in the next month or so (*hint*).
We'll hit the 2-year mark on the 13th of April.
Oooooooooooooh! You saw it here first, folks!
Boyfriend and I just had our one year anniversary on the 13th, and he gave me a gorgeous pair of emerald earrings.
I just lost one :(
It's the first piece of jewelery I've ever received from a boyfriend.
Awww honey. That's so sad. *hugs* there will be other jewelery.
@ Perry: ohmigod, that's so exciting!
If it hadn't been you, it would have been some other woman.
Comforting words for anyone finding them self on the wrong side or right in a relationship.
:apaw: for Pilau
Hope he is feeling better soon
cute little symbols...where are you getting them?
I came into the ER Wednesday morning thinking I had some stress-induced indigestion, and as it turns out it was a little more serious and I'm going to end up having my gallbladder removed tomorrow morning. Being in the hospital sucks!
You are lucky to have been diagnosed promptly.
Boyfriend and I just had our one year anniversary on the 13th, and he gave me a gorgeous pair of emerald earrings.
I just lost one :(
It's the first piece of jewelery I've ever received from a boyfriend.
I hope it turns up. I feel your anguish.
Boyfriend and I just had our one year anniversary on the 13th, and he gave me a gorgeous pair of emerald earrings.
I just lost one :(
It's the first piece of jewelery I've ever received from a boyfriend.
Thats an aweful feeling Razz, keep up hope. I lost my promise ring, I went crazy looking for it. I retraced every step from the day I lost it.
A month later, my mom found in on the driveway, miraculously not ran over.
If you don't find the other earring, perhaps the one you have can be converted into a pendant for a necklace?
The catfight between Ali and Bri. I like them both and don't understand why they don't like each other.
poor earring lost in the world of lostedness
The catfight between Ali and Bri. I like them both and don't understand why they don't like each other.
Yup. Times one hundred.
Sorry , Razz, bout your earring too.
(if you see me with an emerald nose piercing in the RFN thread it's co-inky-dink, I promise!)
I'll get Mum to pray to St Anthony for you, in case it helps.
lol. Gran used to insist I ought to pray to St Anthony every time I lost something.
Wait a minute, does your Mum weigh the same as a duck? (Just had a conversation with Pete about the Church and little hidden pagan things)
OMG this stomach bug needs to go away already. Srsly. I've been in dire straits since last Sunday. The younger kid had it for a day and got better, but the older one's been having symptoms alongside me since Tuesday.
today I'm upset about how ridiculously difficult it is to get my visa so I can move.
OMG this stomach bug needs to go away already. Srsly. I've been in dire straits since last Sunday. The younger kid had it for a day and got better, but the older one's been having symptoms alongside me since Tuesday.
stomach bug or salmonella?
It's the first piece of jewelery I've ever received from a boyfriend.
come now, I'm sure you've been given a pearl necklace or two, haven't you?
stomach bug or salmonella?
How do you tell the difference? It can't be the recent peanut salmonella, because the stepkid who's allergic to peanuts has it too.
Stomach bugs don't usually make you wish you were dead and generally not as violent vomiting. Also, not that you could tell right away, but I have read that salmonella can lead to or cause arthritis. (I may have to look this up on medlineplus.gov)
Charming:
snip
Are there long term consequences to a Salmonella infection? [INDENT] [LEFT]Persons with diarrhea usually recover completely, although it may be several months before their bowel habits are entirely normal. A small number of persons with Salmonella develop pain in their joints, irritation of the eyes, and painful urination. This is called Reiter's syndrome. It can last for months or years, and can lead to chronic arthritis which is difficult to treat. Antibiotic treatment does not make a difference in whether or not the person develops arthritis. [/LEFT]
[/INDENT]
Yeah...if it's gone on for more than 24 hours, you should go to the docs. It can lead to serious dehydration if you're not careful. most bugs only take a day or so to go away, but food poisoning in any form can take a bit longer. Alternatively, if it's a really bad bug, you should probably go see a doc anyway.
I dunno, maybe.
You treat salmonellosis by managing any complications until it passes. Dehydration caused by diarrhea is the most common complication. Antibiotics are not usually needed unless the infection has spread.
The Imodium is being quite effective, I'm not actually losing liquids at all (as long as I keep taking it, that is,) so dehydration isn't an issue. The stomach cramps are what's killing me, but I'm not sure that's going to be enough justification for the doctor to prescribe me antibiotics. Can't happen tomorrow, anyway, so I guess if it's still around by Monday then I'll go. But dammit, January's already got seven freaking doctor's appointments on the calendar, I didn't want to add another one.
If you're using imodium and still getting bad cramping, it could be because your body is still trying to expell what's bothering it.
Be really careful Clod. I wouldn't wait another day if I were you. Definitely not a whole weekend.
I hope you are feeling better, Clodfobble. Illness like that is not fun at all.
Our old cat is also sick - very congested, breathing through her mouth, not eating much at all. Going back to the vet on Monday and I'm not sure she will make it there, or make it home. :(
I'm so sorry sweetwater. My heart goes out to you. :(
second day in a row that there has been radiator fluid on the driveway under my truck. Apparently saying 5 Hail Mary's and a special prayer to St. Anthony did not work. Will now go to the Mexican grocery store and get one of those prayer candles with the baby in the fancy robes who has a halo on his head and light it up. Will report back soon.
Maybe try parking in a different spot.
If you park by the neighbor's dog house, those puddles disappear.
When I was at work, the kids got loose from their parents and pillaged my bedroom. They fed a set of dominos to the dog and one or the other of them lost my glasses.
My eyes hurt and I want to take out my contacts. I'm not tired enough to go to bed yet, would like to do some embroidery while watching a movie but unless I find my glasses I'd be blind as a bat.
Followed by healing, believe it or not.
I forgave them for feeding toys to the dog, it's far from the first time they've done so. The dog's a lab, he eats stuff, there's no point getting mad at him.
I'd be happy if I could just find my freaking glasses!
besides... he's only borrowing them.
Apparently dominos cause horrible gas as well. Just thought I'd let y'all know.
Yup. I was wondering if the dog could digest them. If he can't God have mercy on his hole. I've heard their acids can dissolve most anything. I wish him luck on this one. Hope it's ok... I love me some animals. esp dogs. Find your glasses & keep your eye on him.
oh I'm not concerned. Besides the gas he's doing just fine. This dog has the digestive system of a goat, you wouldn't believe some of the shit he's eaten in his lifetime!
countless toys, a mailbox, electrical cords (unplugged, thank god!), and the most impressive of all: a hot tub (from what I gather, he was surfing on the lid of the hot tub one hot summer day when he suddenly realized that there was water beneath the lid. He proceeded to eat his way down through the lid to access the water).
The dominos were old fashioned wooden ones, he'll be fine.
I wondered about that. Mine are "ivory" (very hard plastic). I'm glad he didn't eat mine. Did you know that it is possible to slam a domino down on the table so hard it will break. I didn't until it happened to me. Really.
My schnauzer ate a whole large bag of hershey's kisses, wrappers and all. I expected her to be really sick, or worse. Other than shitting foil for two days and being out a bag of candy... no harm done.
Back to the thread:
I'm too stoopid to figure out how to post a youtube vid. I saw one this morning thats a damn whoot. Very upsetting.
Capn - something i can help with at least!
Check your browser when watching the clip.
Cut and paste the numbers AFTER the equals sign.
Insert as follows, but using the usual square brackets, not the curly ones:
{youtube}your pasted details{/youtube}
Good luck
thanks! I'll give it a whirl.
I'm tired and I'm not looking forward to getting up at 6am tomorrow.
Take a personal. But tomorrow is Monday... not good on your record.
Remember Hacky McCoughALot? (Who, by the way, coughs her freaking head off all day every day but didn't even clear her throat in our all day meeting on Friday...methinks it's a form of hypochondria or Munchhausen.)
She sent the following email to the suite:
Who ever put in the cup of coffee to heat up, will you please now clean up the mess that was left in the microwave?
Others would also like to use it
Not too bad, huh? Though, would it have been nicer to ask around, or to embarrass someone who made a mistake? I didn't do it on purpose...for god's sake I had a big system error this morning which still isn't fixed and it's been nuts. The new girl(yeah me), who doesn't fit in anyway, is now a dumbass coffee-leaver. :lol:
Her charming personality gives light to the fact that she is a bitch, though I have given the benefit of the doubt.
A partial definition of class is to not go out of your way to make others uncomfortable.
People suck. Doesn't matter where you go.
I wondered about that. Mine are "ivory" (very hard plastic). I'm glad he didn't eat mine. Did you know that it is possible to slam a domino down on the table so hard it will break. I didn't until it happened to me. Really.
My schnauzer ate a whole large bag of hershey's kisses, wrappers and all. I expected her to be really sick, or worse. Other than shitting foil for two days and being out a bag of candy... no harm done.
:D One of my dogs ate a whole pizza off the counter and left the box, somehow he opened it and after removing the pizza the box fell shut as if it had never been opened. So when we opened the recently purchased pizza box and there wasn't one, we thought it was a joke by a family member. He had an upset stomach for a few days. :D
@Shawnee -- I recommend
passiveaggressivenotes.com for some laughs to get your mind off of Ms. Hacky.
Or put some stinkbait in her trash can.
Dont waste your money on anyting other than the blood bait type, tho.
heeheee...since the email was sent to the whole suite, I replied to all with an innocent unless you know me passive aggressive as well response.
I said "Oh, sorry, I forgot, didn't mean to cause a huge deal."
Then I cleaned it up and replied again "mistake is fixed."
lol...so since then people have been sneaking into my cubie laughing at me...saying she's a stirrer and was prolly kind of testing me to see if I'm wimpy wimpy wimpy.
Lord...how silly in the workplace from an old bat. Anyway, it wasn't a big deal but it did irritate the hell out of me...because it was a bit embarrassing.
People like her...not much you can do about them. *shrugs*
:)
s123:
What an unpleasant unwelcome. The silver lining is that you've learned early what to expect--that's not nothing. A gift of advance notice so to speak.
Now, linger no more on such a worthless waste of breath. I know that is much easier to say than do, but it's smart and worthwhile advice nonetheless.
Wait...I was talking about you and your life, right?
Take a personal. But tomorrow is Monday... not good on your record.
Thanks capnhowdy, good points.
But I've now come down with man flu (suspected tonsillitis), so having a personal today. On the plus side my cousin just added me on facebook, so I know have 7 friends ooOOoooh I hear you cry!
s123:
Now, linger no more on such a worthless waste of breath. I know that is much easier to say than do, but it's smart and worthwhile advice nonetheless.
Thanks BigV. I was never really upset...it's such a small thing, but I think I am still having some culture shock; as bad as my old job could be I do miss my peoples. My old job was family, albeit a dysfunctional one. And I really do like my new cow orkers...but I keep everything on the down low. They think I'm quiet. I would go so far to say that they think I'm from some small town up north and am country-bumpkinish...which makes me smile. It's good for me career-wise, not saying or doing everything that pops into my head. Maybe at my old job I was too much "me."
Venting here let me get it out, read how silly it sounds, and get over it. I'm learning. :p
Sorry to trip in on people with real problems, but my latest
culinary FAIL has upset me. To the extent that I want to bring it into every thread I've read since, so am putting it here (as well as Food & Drink) and taking a step back.
What's upsetting me today is that I can't stop eating!
So far I've had two pieces of toast, a pear, a bowl of rice bubbles and some potato chips.
When will it end!
Good lord Ali, Stop! That sounds like about what I eat while making dinner.
Well it's only lunch time here, so that's breaky and lunch i suppose. But it seems like a lot compared to what I've been eating. I'm making spaghetti for dinner.
What's upsetting me today is that I can't stop eating!
So far I've had two pieces of toast, a pear, a bowl of rice bubbles and some potato chips.
When will it end!
At delivery.
Or when you stop breast feeding, if you choose to do so. In fact you actually need more calories at that time.
At this time, be a good mom and stick to fruits, veggies, and some occassional cheese and fiber rich crackers. And don't forget your prenatal vitamins. :D
[COLOR="LemonChiffon"]{thinking of you!}[/COLOR]
And don't forget your genetically modified antigens.
I don't take antigens...and to be honest, I don't take vit suppliments either. Generally just eat healthy food.
At the moment I'm trying to eat lots of brain foods. Fish, beans, green veges (which I just can't say enough good stuff about), linseed oil in salad dressings...all the good stuff. :)
eta: todays menu is not a typical menu for me which is what's bothering me.
Also your Thalidomide.
Wait, no!
lol...I don't think you can get that here...
A really bad day...:sniff:
Sorry, Shawnee. Hang in there. At least tomorrow has a high chance of being better, right?
Oh noes Shawnee :headshake
Son is 14 days late on student loan! Afucking gain
Alltel sent me a letter saying that they had approved my $100 rebate and it would be in the mail in 3-5 weeks.
If it's approved and they know they are going to pay me, wouldn't it have been just as easy to mail the rebate as it was to mail the damn letter? Cheese&rice!
just Fuck it. that's all.
OMG it was such an incredibly bad idea to have a soda and a large mocha this evening. I normally don't have any caffeine after lunchtime, and I had this whole theory that it would make sure I stayed awake while I was long-distance driving... and hey, my theory worked out great! Except I was done driving six and a half hours ago, and I'm still fucking awake.
I woke up this morning, as per usual, to get up and head in to class.
Then the reality of how far behind I am in this class combined with how much I need to get done for all of my other classes immediately set in and gave me a panic attack.
Neat. I emailed the teacher and told her I was sick. I have to get shit done. -.-
Or, the whole fucking world can just ignore everything I say or do. Debbil knows I have nothing to contribute.
I dropped my slide box and shattered every slide in it. :smack: Now I have to come in on a planned day off to repeat an experiment.
:censored: klutz.
Or, the whole fucking world can just ignore everything I say or do. Debbil knows I have nothing to contribute.
What, and miss the entertainment? No way.:D
I dropped my slide box and shattered every slide in it. :smack: Now I have to come in on a planned day off to repeat an experiment.
:censored: klutz.
Do you have
any idea how nerdy that makes you sound?
I'm
swooning!I'm not really upset, just sad:
So I sent that letter for my ex boss's recognition dinner thingy, and had talked to my sis in law some time ago and she mentioned I should come. She has not mentioned it since.
As I was talking to my best friend, she asked if I was going to go and it occurred to me I didn't get an invite.
Now, an oversight this could be, but I started thinking about "what if there is some kind of deal" where the pres would be all put out just because I don't work there anymore? I left on great terms, but I didn't blow all the right people when I was there, so who knows? Sure, I could ask my sis in law, but that might put her in a position of having to say "welllllllllll..." and I don't want to do that either.
My conclusion is that, just in case, it's best if I just don't go. I don't want to cause any problems or steal anyone's thunder. I want the honorees to enjoy the evening and if I might stand in the way of that at all I should just stay away.
But it makes me sad. My ex boss was like a big sis I never had. I will send her a card with my best wishes. :(
And, the bright side is, it reminds me how stupidly political that place was, and reminds me how very happy I am to be here.
PS. people are leaving that place in droves.
Sorry Shawnee.
When I read that you were involved in a party for a former boss, I was struck by that because I though most employers basically banned previous employees from all events. But it's sad nevertheless that the politics are keeping you from attending.
Sorry Shawnee.
When I read that you were involved in a party for a former boss, I was struck by that because I though most employers basically banned previous employees from all events. But it's sad nevertheless that the politics are keeping you from attending.
Heehee...but in higher education you have an educated, kinder, gentler population, right? ;) We're all about success!
Yeah, I see what you're saying. Then again, another former cow orker who has stolen 2 employees from there and is working on a third, goes to everything. She did blow all the right people, including her husband she snagged a couple years ago (bigwig IT guy.) Eh, that's her, that's not me.
I can be incredibly naive about these kinds of things...I always expect better from people.
Shawnee, for what it's worth, I would double-check with your sister-in-law if I were you. It sounds like more than one person is acting as if they expect you to come. There may not have even been formal invitations other than a corporate email, and of course you don't have an email address with the old workplace anymore... If you don't want to put your sis-in-law on the spot, just casually ask her to say hi to everyone there for you, and that will give her the chance to either say nothing, or ask you what the hell you mean because of course you're coming, right?
If you don't want to put your sis-in-law on the spot, just casually ask her to say hi to everyone there for you, and that will give her the chance to either say nothing, or ask you what the hell you mean because of course you're coming, right?
Wise lady is wise.
Damn thats good Clod - My mom still does shit like that to me.
Damn women!
Shawnee, for what it's worth, I would double-check with your sister-in-law if I were you. It sounds like more than one person is acting as if they expect you to come. There may not have even been formal invitations other than a corporate email, and of course you don't have an email address with the old workplace anymore... If you don't want to put your sis-in-law on the spot, just casually ask her to say hi to everyone there for you, and that will give her the chance to either say nothing, or ask you what the hell you mean because of course you're coming, right?
Thank you. I thought about this, then thought I think I'd rather not go anyway. It was something I had looked forward to, but the idea of perhaps being not welcome made me think about people asking me questions "how's it going?" and me playing down the fact that I love where I am now, and it's 10 times better. I would graciously say, as I've said all along, that I am eternally grateful for what I learned there, the friends I made, the fact that it was a fluke that I even started in this field because of a little ad in the paper when I was working at the Country Club because I had my last of tech positions in crappy little companies.
I am grateful. I am happier.
I just don't want to detract from the event, though I know a lot of people go out of obligation. I was one of the few who went every year even if it wasn't me or a close friend being honored.
And I think I would have received something, in the way of invitation; my sis in law knows how to get ahold of me, and if you're not an honoree or a guest, you buy your meal.
More than anything, I just know my boss hates these kinds of things but will go out of duty, and I would have loved to see the look on her face when sis in law reads the letter. She'll love it. That's cool for me.
:)
my blood pressure was high when I went to the doctor today. Never had a problem with it before. :(
Maybe go check it yourself at the drugstore a few time... see if it was an anomaly?
Did you have your feet on the floor, Cloud? When docs or nurses take it, you're often up on the table with your feet dangling. That can raise your pressure by 10-15 points, iirc. If it's a one-time thing, there's really not much to worry about.
This site has a list of more things that can affect the reading:
[LIST=1]
[*] Not sitting quietly.
[*] Not sitting quietly for 3 minutes.
[*] Waiting too long before taking it.
[*] Feet not flat on floor (dangling or legs crossed).
[*] Back not supported.
[*] Use of nicotine, alcohol, or caffeine within 30 minutes prior.
[*] Rolled up sleeve (compresses arm).
[*] Clothing still on arm.
[*] Bladder full (urinary that is).
[*] Incorrect size cuff (usually too small).
[*] Cuff not positioned properly (edges must be aligned, 1 inch above bend of elbow).
[*] Incorrect arm (the right upper arm is the correct place to take BP). Not the forearm, nor the wrist, nor the finger.
[*] Arm not relaxed.
[*] Arm not supported.
[*] Arm not at heart level. Allowed to be straight down.
[*] Talking (either operator or patient).[/LIST]
hope it is an anomaly--doc didn't seem to concerned about it. I'm getting my cholesterol checked, a gyn exam, and a colon cancer screening coming up, too. joy.
I'll be good for a while and see if it comes up high again.
I told him no mamo this year 'cause of the healing nipple piercing. :)
Today, aside from the same old same (trying to get over a broken heart by not talking to object of love/best friend) also my back and my elbow hurt. Suckage.
My groin is shaved as a result of the angioplasty. I will most probably have a new partner this weekend.
WWUD?
All these years I've never not had pubic hair.
How do you wimmens feel about it?
Are there a lot of guys that shave now?
No worries. you're just keeping up with the manscaping.
ooh. sexy!
and be honest about the explanation.
This is funny:
After all I put myself through, I just found out my ex boss isn't even attending the dinner! LOL...letter was written in vain. Oh well...
I thought she'd be kind of obligated to go.
Good thing: my best friend applied for a job here. It's basically the state counterpart to my federal reporting duties, but they won't make hers a professional position like they did mine, it will still be classified. Still, they'll pay her more than she makes in the hellhole, and she won't have to be stressed out 24/7. I hope she gets it! We can carpool.
My groin is shaved as a result of the angioplasty. I will most probably have a new partner this weekend.
WWUD?
All these years I've never not had pubic hair.
How do you wimmens feel about it?
Are there a lot of guys that shave now?
It grows back. Maybe. :)
How do you wimmens feel about it?
Are there a lot of guys that shave now?
Tell her about the angioplasty. You'll get a sympathy/nurturing bonus.
Lost the house I was trying to buy, lost my job, my wife and daughter are on the other side of the planet, and I'm trying to find a job, but finding very little luck so far because there are few jobs and every job out there has 10,000 people applying for it.
Didn't you have a dream of moving to Vietnam someday and opening a restaurant? Maybe now's the perfect time.
Westminster (aka Little Saigon) is much closer.
Damn. I'm too old for this fecal mass. After only weeks of "courting", this woman now is at my regular lunch dive EVERY FOKKIN DAY..... calls me every other hour, and if I need free time and try to politely avoid her she KNOCKS ON THE GODDAM DOOR to "check on me and see if I am allright".
I always and always will enjoy two scotches with my buds at the Moose Lodge every evening from 5 till 7. This is a crucial part of my time budget. NOW SHE CALLS ME THEN, and I've been clear that this is "my" time.
If I DO get intimate with her, my ass would prolly be strapped to the altar. Jeez.
She's my age and is behaving like a schoolgirl.
NUTSMOKE
I think I prefer to sit here alone and wait on my crotch hair to grow back. The procedure was on Dec 18 and I still barely have a stubble.
All this shit upsets me.
[grabs scotch bottle and throws cap away...]:headshake
:comfort:
That was hilarious...thanks for the laugh.
Moose Lodge
The funny-hat style moose lodge with a grand poo-bah and all that? or just a bar that happens to have that name?
Grand poo-bah.
As my dad would tell my mom "with an attitude like that you'll never get into Moosehaven."
capn will get it. :lol:
Yup. Poo-bah.
Moose Lodge # 1609
cool. another thing I thought was only in the movies....
My mom just called. My cousin is gone. There aren't many details...she and her husband were divorcing, but he has an alibi.
I used to babysit her. She was a sweet sweet girl.
When my mom called I thought she said my nephew's name. I was in hysterics.
I don't understand this world I don't understand it at all.
oh shawnee, that's awful :(
I'm so very sorry, Shawnee. Do they have any other information?
Sorry Shawnee, that is some bad shit.
Oh Shawnee. Im sorry, hon.
We don't know anything. My uncle (my favorite one) called my mom and he could barely tell her. I can't believe this is happening to my aunt and uncle. I don't understand.
I go from disbelief to horror and I just don't understand why something like this could happen. I'm angry, so fucking angry that such a wonderful person could have so much pain in her life. I don't fucking get it.
My uncle had just talked to her yesterday, and he said she was in good spirits. They don't believe she would have done this to herself. I think of her smiling face, she was always such a happy girl, and I think that she couldn't have.
It doen't make any sense.
Then you're not sure it wasn't an accident? Hang in there, we're all here for you.:grouphug:
My Hiatal Hernia has raised hell since I tried to eat a bacon biscuit this AM.
no, we don't know.
I've been reading sites about death...the questions, the emotions. I find I keep coming back here to my friends.
Thank you all. I don't know what I believe, but if you believe in prayer please pray for my family. I don't know how we're going to get through this. I think of my aunt and uncle and I jsut don't know how we're going to get through this.
One day at a time, or if that's overwhelming one hour at a time. Hell, one minute at a time if you have to. Just don't look too far ahead, planning how to handle it and shit, because it never follows your script.
I thought I'd get out of the house. I drove through town and there was a wedding party walking down the street, probably hitting bars before the reception (it's kind of a tradition in the young wedding circles.) They looked to be heading back to the limo.
They made me smile. I rolled down my window and yelled "woohoo" and gave them a thumbs up. They woohoo'd me back and I smiled. Immediately after this I was crying again.
So I think a minute at a time is what I can handle right now.
All the sites are saying "talk about it" adn that's what Im doing here. I'm so grateful for this place and you people.
Yeah, we're real useful sometimes. :blush:
Shawnee, I'm really sorry. That's horrible news.
Me too. Wish we could all give you a hug.
I suppose you're going to have to wait to find out what happened.:(
I will be at my parent's house tomorrow. Maybe we'll know more, but the result is the same.
Fucking what the fuck? What the fuck?
They don't know if my grammy would even know what they meant if they told her. They were very close. Grammy is almost 98, and doesn't have all her mental faculties. A (my cousin) used to go over and help her clean her collection of salt and pepper shakers, hundreds of them, and A was a pastry chef.
Fuck. God fucking dammit.
No, it won't change it, but It might help you and your folks get your head around it. It's not about her now, it's about damage control for the ones left behind. You have to kick in the survival instinct and take care of yourself. Please.
Grammy's in her own world... sometimes I think we feel sorry for people like that when we should envy them.
I just can't stop thinking of my aunt and uncle. He is my dad's youngest sibling. i was raised catholic, but didn't get baptized right away because my dad's job had us moving a lot. When I was 8 years old and my little brother was being baptized, I got to be also and got to choose my godparents. I chose them. They were young and hip and I thought they were awesome. I babysat for their kids when I was in HS. My uncle worked for social security and is a big reader...so I always felt particularly close to him as a kid and now as an adult, FA being a public service of sorts as well.
It's just not fair. None of it.
How old was she, Shawnee? Did she have any kids?
Early 30s. They lived in the south, haven't seen her in a couple years. Kids, yeah.
She was the cutest kid. My aunt and uncle adopted her and her sister when they were very young. I keep picturing playing with them on the swingset in their backyard. She grew up witht he same smile on her face all the time...cutest giggle, a real personable girl.
Thanks for letting me get this out.
One of the guys I work with was getting ready to retire, until his 33 year old daughter suddenly left him with two kids 8 and 12. It took me a while to convince him that along with his grief, it was OK to be angry with her for such a selfish act.
He'll eventually cope, but I worry about the kids.
have you heard how her sister is taking it?
Anger has to come into play. It's one of the stages.
We all grieve differently, but the basic pattern is the same.
I'm angry at this world, for being so hurtful. It makes me wonder if there really is some kind of grand plan, some reason for faith. It answers no questions but resurfaces a lot of old ones.
have you heard how her sister is taking it?
No...all I know right now is what my mom knows and told me on the phone. Nothing.
Her brother is in Korea with his wife and children. Aunt and Uncle just visited there recently.
God, Shawnee, how awful. Praying ain't my thing, but I'm thinking of you and your family.
WTF? thats horrible - Since I know most of you don't pray, I will. I'm very sorry for your family's loss.
Thank you classic. That means a lot to me.
There still isn't any real info. She left two kids, about 1 and 4 years old behind.
It was nice to be with my family today: if my little nieces can't cheer someone up no one can.
Early 30s. They lived in the south, haven't seen her in a couple years. Kids, yeah.
I was wrong about the age. She was only 28.
Just read this Shawnee (came here to moan but won't now)
Really sorry to hear about it.
You have a strong family and you will all support eachother.
Try to leave puzzling out the universe til later in the year. The way you're feeling right now you'll just think it's a shitty place, and that won't help you deal with this any better.
My thoughts are with you x
I'm sorry too Shawnee. I hope that things become clearer for all of you very soon.
My thoughts are with you also.
Thanks hons.
Please don't let me stop any moaning. I"ve moaned so much here over the years I would expect moaning...you don't moan anyway, silly girl.
Thanks so much for the support.
Peace and best wishes, Shawnee.
I really love you guys. Thanks.
There's nothin to really say that hasn't already been said.
I'll keep positiveness and good vibes your way. I hope ya'll get the answers you need, and are able to begin to heal.
Thanks, Miss Moar. You're sweet.
Yeah...not much was said about it today with my family, more time spent on what "is" as far as enjoying my nieces. Mostly I'm worried about my aunt/uncle's family. Then I think about her and I am in such dire straits...asking why, it's all so very surreal right now. It's just a damn freaking shame.
Thanks for your kind words. I have never had to ask the hard questions before: all my personal losses have been the elderly among us. This doesn't make sense.
So sorry for your loss, Shawnee. My thoughts are with you and your family :grouphug: .
Keep your chin up there Shawnee.
Shawnee, I'll keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.
Thanks, I appreciate your thoughts and concern. Means a lot to me.
Are the kids with their Grandparents?
I don't know what's going on. They lived in FL, mom knows nothing, no one will talk to me...I'm completely lost. Is the husband a suspect? I don't know. Are the kids with him? I don't know. Does he have family? I don't know. Are my aunt and uncle OK? I don't know.
I don't know anything.
I have never had to ask the hard questions before: all my personal losses have been the elderly among us. This doesn't make sense.
Ask Shawnee - and if you get some answers please share. There are others looking for those same answers.
My family wouldn't talk about it yesterday. I emailed mom to day and she replied with a "know nothing will let you know" just like that. No, let's not freaking talk about it.
I am completely alone here. I have no one to ask.
I'm sorry I think I am losing it.
Losing "it" is normal when things are this upside down.
That's horrible, Shawnee. We're here for you. :grouphug:
I don't know if it's upsetting, or not, but we are eligable to apply for citizenship this year (August, but you can apply several months in advance), but I have just confirmed that it will cost $675 each (total $2,700 + any legal/mailing costs), so I guess we don't really need to make a decision about if we're ready/want to....
I can get you U.S. citizenship wholesale. Why pay more?
Dazza purchased a gift certificate for me to have a massage and facial for our last anniversary which I was planning to use this morning and had booked an appointment for, but Mav came home yesterday arvo (after business hours closed) and said that he was to present his house captain speach this morning during that time and of course as a mum I have to be there for him.
So I rang the spa and asked to postpone the appointment and the woman told me they can't do that and that because I haven't given 24 hours notice they'll have to deduct 50% from the voucher. I then suggested that if that's how they treat their clients I have no wish to be one, so could they simply refund the balance and I'll go somewhere else to which she responded that they don't refund gift vouchers.
I've looked on their website and there's nothing with those terms on it, and there's definitely nothing on the paperwork that came with the gift voucher.
This is really upsetting me because it was gift from my husband and I think they've really give him a raw deal by doing what they've done. I feel bad because I've fucked it up by not being able to go when I said I would, but I can't choose otherwise for the sake of my son.
Maybe it's just the hormones in my system at the moment, but I can't stop crying now. I'd really like to kick that bitch in the cunt.
She hasn't heard the last of me. I'm going to get my shit together and then point out a few facts for her and see what she has to say.
But what makes you think it's your last anniversary?
Update:
My uncle has left for FL to talk to the detective on the case. My aunt is staying here hoping to make funeral arrangements here, but for some reason they are doubtful.
I am going to take 2 Advil PM to help me sleep, take a hot bath, and go to bed and read until I fall asleep.
Thanks for putting up with me the past few days.
Shawnee
That sucks Ali, and would make me really angry too . Its awful costumer service! Talk to the manager, and if necessary after that her manager.
Shawnee, try taking that advil pm with some warm milk too. Im so sorry that you are going through this...but especially that you are being kept in the dark...I can only imagine how hurtfully frustrating that is. Im sending you a wish for comforting peace.
:(
I just read all this. I am so sorry, and I am sending out a little prayer for you and yours.
Seriously.
This is the letter I'm thinking of sending.
Dear Madam,
My name is aliantha. We spoke this morning on the phone in regard to my appointment at 10am today. During this conversation, you informed me that due to my inability to allow you 24 hours notice, you would be required to deduct 50% of the value of my gift voucher. As a potential, and in fact paid up front client, I feel this is very bad customer service to begin with, and wonder how you think your business will survive these tough times when luxury items such as facials and massages are likely to be the first things off the list of justifiable spending. You may think that your 'policy' is fair on you, but considering the fact that you've had the money in the bank from this voucher for almost 6 months now, I'd say you've definitely had the good end of the stick.
You will recall that upon being informed of this 'policy', I requested that you refund the balance of the value - being in excess of $100 - as I no longer felt any desire to be a client of yours, you informed me of your second 'policy' which is that you do not refund gift vouchers.
I put it to you that if you do not refund this money, you are in fact stealing from my husband, Dr Daryl McPhee, because at no time during his discussions with you was he informed of either of these 'policies', and there is no documentation anywhere on your voucher no. 6337595 or on your website to that effect either.
I will expect an immediate response to this email affirming your intention to refund this voucher in full. If this is not the case, then I will have no choice other than to seek recompense through alternative means.
Yours sincerely,
Do you know if she was able to rebook that time to another client, Ali? If not, I think you're being somewhat unreasonable and the 50% seems fair -she was unable to use that chair/room during that time which represent loss of income to her, although she may have been able to avoid paying the therapist if she was able to get the message to her in time (which seems unlikely if i understand correctly and you called in the morning to cancel a 10am appointment).
It is standard practice here for you to be responsible for 50-100% of the charges if you cancel an appointment with les than 24hours notice, almost without exception. A child forgetting to inform you of a school obligation would not usually be considered an emergency.
Before sending this letter, I would advise you to consider what outcome you want. Do you want to get the most you can from the voucher, do you want revenge, or do you want justice? The letter is at best unpleasant in tone and makes you sound like a bullying harridan who attacks and then hides behind her husband's coattails. I believe this letter would raise the hackles of most people and cause them to give you the minimum they possibly can. If you can stand to lose the whole voucher, go ahead. It will probably make her upset/angry for a while, so you will have revenge.
If you want to see some money or other form of compensation, I advise you to adopt a much more conciliatory tone.
If you want true justice, I would seek the advice of a local business bureau/citizens advice bureau before taking any action.
this letter is written while you are still in the anger stage of your upset, and I believe that it may not be in your best interests to act during that stage.
JMHO
Dr. Monster ;)
Well, it was Dazza who purchased the voucher in the first place as a gift for me, so it is he who outlaid the money which they've had for some considerable time now.
I accept that they can keep the 50% for the cancellation but do they really expect me to want to go there and spend the remainder of the voucher when they've been slightly unreasonable, and I might add, not informing a client of their 'policy', and that right there is the crux of my argument. At no time were we informed either verbally or in writing that the place had this policy. It is to be found nowhere. Normally if a service industry has this policy, they make it pretty clear up front and it should be written on the voucher if nowhere else. Whether that is in fact law or simply common practice I know not, but most industries stipulate these sorts of terms in writing.
To be honest, I was really shocked at her hardline approach to a new customer. I've never had someone behave that way before. On the few other occassions where this sort of issue has come up, the shop has always been accomodating about rebooking and it is very surprising to me that she'd be so unreasonable.
As to the issue of the voucher being unrefundable (which is what I asked for on the phone - the balance ie 50%) well that's at the stores discretion. Under normal circumstances, I'd think that yes, it's reasonable not to refund, but under this circumstance, if I were the manager with an unhappy customer on the phone, I would think that conceding the remaining 50% would be the best option even if it is not normally the case.
My issue is that daryl paid for this 6 months ago, and now I wont go there because for one thing, they know that I wanted to change the time and chances are they'd know about the conversation over the phone, so what sort of service am I likely to get anyway, and secondly I believe that if there'd been some kind of documentation of their policy I'd have tried to manage the situation differently, such as by calling yesterday afternoon even though that still wouldn't have been 24 hours notice. As it was, I called before normal business hours this morning hoping that I'd catch them early enough to make better arrangements.
At no time during the conversation did she suggest that perhaps I get there when I can and have half the service and perhaps come back at a later date for the rest (which in hindsight is what should have been the suggestion imo), or that as a show of good faith, they could waive their usual 'fee' for cancellation or anything. She was not willing to concede a thing and that's bad business practice in that sort of industry. You go to a day spa to relax. Who can relax after a confrontation with the manager?
In effect, the business has us by the short and curlies thanks to their alleged policies and quite frankly, if they think they're going to get away with it, they have another thing coming.
Too right I'm pissed off about it. Yes they should have to pay. Either give me back at least 50% of what has been paid, or I'm going to make some noise.
What I'm really upset about is the fact that it was a gift to me from Daryl and I feel like it's something I've broken. I feel like I've not given it justice. I couldn't care less about the massage or facial. It's the fact that Daryl tried to do something special for me and I've fucked it up through no fault of my own.
With regard to her rebooking, they're a full service spa including hair dressing and waxing etc. I have very little doubt that they'd be able to rebook considering they were unable to book me in for over a week from when I called to make the appointment.
I understand that, really, but you need to be sure what outcome you want before you select your weapons. The letter is very nicely written and expresses your feeling in no uncertain terms, I just doubt it's the best vehicle for getting your refund.
At this point I don't really care about the money. I want them to realize that they're treating clients badly and in the long run, it's going to be bad for their business.
I get what you're saying. At this point though, i have nothing to lose really. I tried diplomacy on the phone and got no result hence the strongly worded email.
It shits me that she wouldn't negotiate. It shits me because she's already got our money.
eta: Be wary of gift vouchers in future! Lesson learned here.
then the letter is great.
Get Lexi to kick her in the cunt for you.
Have you gone to the salon? There may well be a notice about the cancellation fees hanging on the wall. It may not be on the gift certificate, but might actually be posted somewhere. All Salons I worked for had this same policy. This is usually because the girls are paid via commission, and losing a spa package (usually 2-4 hours) is a lot of money.
I would also suggest re-wording your letter slightly.... Put the focus on the policy breach more, and less on the owner. People get defensive when threatened or told they are wrong.
"I would ask that you put yourself into my situation. Nowhere on the gift certificate, or on your website does it mention the cancellation policy or the no refund policy. I am sure you can clearly see how one could get confused and upset when these matters are "sprung upon" them. While I was on the the phone with someone from your spa, I felt as though my concerns and miss-understanding were being dismissed. I am sure the staff member was just busy, and not trying to be rude or indifferent. This gift certificate was given to me by my husband as he thought I would enjoy the services your spa provides. I am hoping that we can work out this miss-understanding to both of our best interests. I look forward to hearing from you soon to resolve this unfortunate situation."
That being said, even if you do not want to have the services because of her abruptness and rudeness on the phone, They may have products in the store you could purchase. You might not want to be pampered by this business, but if you need shampoo/make-up/hairspray anyway..... at least you are getting some of you hubby's well earned money in products.
When you are ready to get pampered, I would suggest calling a mobile spa service. As a mobile business, I was much more lenient with cancellations, as I did not have the overhead of the salon itself to worry about.
She responded to my email saying she wouldn't refund the money but that I could use the voucher to purchase items from the store.
I told her she could choose and I'd have someone pick them up. At this point I really don't give a shit anymore.
Does getting kicked in the cunt hurt as bad as getting kicked in the balls?
The world may never know...
You might have to ask a hermaphrodite that question. ;)
My students.
Today was my first full day. I taught 5 out of my 6 classes. While most of the kids were great, a few of them were awful and I ended up sitting in after my last class of the day to have a good cry. Tomorrow's another day, I guess.
Does getting kicked in the cunt hurt as bad as getting kicked in the balls?
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say no. But Shawnee hits the nail on the head, the world may never know.
I know that a kick in the nuts is the most painful thing a man could experience. I've seen it first hand.
I guess women don't go around kicking each other in the cunt. Their version of a nut kick must be a hair yanking.
I've known two women injure themselves with something very similar to a kick in the cunt :P One who fell onto a broken bike seat (as a kid) and one who slipped and landed awkwardly on the stilletto heel of her shoe. Both described it as their most shocking and painful experience. The second ended up in hospital over night hemorrahging blood.
and one who slipped and landed awkwardly on the stilletto heel of her shoe.
Uh huh. Yep it happens all the time.
"That's my story and I'm sticking to it."
Stilletto + cunt = hemorrage.
But what if you hit a guy in the nut with a stilletto?
Nutsmoke
Uh huh. Yep it happens all the time.
"That's my story and I'm sticking to it."
lol. Fair enough. Actually I was there at the time. It was pretty fucking awful. She'd sort of slipped, or missed her footing or something, going down some steps.
it hurts. a lot. But it doesn't make you barf like a good kick in the nuts can. I was playing paintball as a young teen and threw myself into some bushes to avoid fire. I landed on a pointy tree stump. I was out of action for a good while and never felt the point-blank paintballs that hit me before people realized something was wrong.
Since nuts are SO sensitive, I often wonder why man hasn't evolved to had a more protective nutsack. Sheesh.
Update:
Uncle told the detective some things he didn't know. I now know that it was a gunshot wound; not the normal MO for a woman. Also, no note, and Uncle had talked to her the day before and she was chatty...not the kind of behavior you expect then to not leave a note. Her husband plans to have her cremated.
We will have memorial service here, at some point.
Holy joe---I missed this one, Shawnee. Sounds awful.
Wow. There is so much pain...
I'm so sorry...
ETA: I just read thru this...there are no words...her two kids...oh-----shawnee, you've been thru the wringer lately...my heart is with you.
I am so sorry, Shawnee. What a damned tragedy! Please accept my condolences and well wishes.
And I hope they figure out what really happened very soon, so you and your family can begin the process of dealing with the grief.
How does Facebook work? My mom said my cousin had a page, but unless I ask her to be my friend and she agrees it won't work? I went through the sign up process but that is as far as I can go?
You probably need an invitation from her to see her page, but sometimes people have their settings lower than that and let anyone in their "network" see their page. That could mean if you said you were from her city, you might possibly be able to see her page. Not likely though.
Oh, OK. Thanks glatt.
It gave me all this stuff, with pics, from people I went to HS and college with. I didn't really want to go there, I guess I'll check my settings.
Yeah the way Facebook works Shawnee is depending on how private one makes their profile determines how accessible it is. You can adjust this in the Privacy Settings from the Settings drop-down button at the top. More often than not, people will set their page to only be viewable by those who are "friends" with them. This is established by sending a "friend request" to the person which they then choose to approve or deny. Facebook also works on a "Network" system where you exist within a particular Network or two which is just about anything these days from a school, to a larger company, to a city. You can set your profile to be viewable by everyone within your Network(s) or not, up to you. Friends of Friends cannot see each other's pages unless they are in the same network or are Friends with each other. How open or closed your profile is and what information you make available is entirely up to you. That said, I would lean more towards less info than more due to the somewhat shady status of what rights Facebook retains to info put on its servers for future use as well as how long said info stays on their servers.
Example: a few months ago I had issue slogging into my account, their customer service sucks hairy ass so it took weeks to actually get the problem solved. However when they "fixed" it initially, I was sent to an old profile I had from my freshman year in 2004 with all the old info from that page still alive and well even though I had merged that account with my current one at my current school and had since long replaced or removed that information from my profile. Apparently, Facebook's servers held onto all of that from 4 YEARS ago, which makes me nervous about how long they retain supposedly deleted information, which coupled with what rights they reserve to use of your info leads me to believe that the less info you give Facebook the better.
They retain everything forever. Even told me so when I deleted my page. I'll NEVER have one again. What they have is already too much. Whatev3r you put on the net is never yours again - its anyone's and there are too many people who will exploit that for personal gain.
:headshake NEVER AGAIN :mad2:
Nothing can change the way things are, Shawnee. But I pray for peace for you and your family.
They retain everything forever. Even told me so when I deleted my page. I'll NEVER have one again. What they have is already too much. Whatev3r you put on the net is never yours again - its anyone's and there are too many people who will exploit that for personal gain.
:headshake NEVER AGAIN :mad2:
I have to agree. I have one. Never really did much with it. I have some pics and a bunch of extended friends I know. Haven't looked at it in month. Who needs Face Book when you have The Cellar.
I need facebook. It's excellent for keeping in touch with my family who don't live close by.
eta: and also for sending out invites and things for upcoming events.
I like the Facebook, particularly how people from my distant past have located me and now send me tidbits about their lives.
[COLOR=Purple]
wow, good old Bob was gay! and Tom too? why didn't they come out to us in college? were they afraid?[/COLOR]
Speaking of...your face appeared when I signed up, UT. How does that thing KNOW who we know if we didn't go to college or HS or work with them? Another friend from my old job that I haven't seen in a long time popped up, with nothing to associate him with me; I put no work info in.
Spooky. Not that I'm complaining.
Don't you know the great UT is omnipresent?
Nothing can change the way things are, Shawnee. But I pray for peace for you and your family.
Thanks dar, and all. I guess the detective has been interviewing friends and cow orkers. It's all unfathomable to me; you hear about it but you rarely know someone that it has happened to.
Again, the support I've gotten here has been something I will never forget. My family won't talk about things like I can here, so I'm forever grateful.
The Great and Powerful Omnitoad.
If you add anybody from the Cellar, you'll get hits for other active Dwellars, cos we're all added up.
Distant past? Hope it stays there.
Cellar's been d r a g g i n g last nite and this morning. Guess it's time to run a tune up program on my machine.
I was up allllll night last night having this really long heart to heart conversation with my best friend about everything that's going on in her life (this was the first conversation EVER like that in our friendship, she's a pretty closed off person, and I've known her since I was in the 5th grade) then I got up this morning and went to work on 4 or 5 hours sleep. Worked all day, came home and was falling asleep in the chair around 7pm, not the "man I'm really sleepy" sort of tired...the eyes burning and head falling down every few seconds before I wake myself back up sort of tired. So I figured it was stupid to stay up...and went to bed.
Well here I am, midnight, wiiiiiiide awake. Ugh!!
I was late for work.
Due to the necessity to speak to my daughter's principal regarding why she was being sent home for the day.
(Don't ask, I'll post something later. Maybe.)
Sorry SD. That sucks. I hope its nothing too serious.
If you add anybody from the Cellar, you'll get hits for other active Dwellars, cos we're all added up.
As were are in reality.
One great big glorious whole.
My fucking car won't fucking start. Fuck.
Let me guess, it is a Jeep and the warranty just ran out.
It's a Jeep still under warranty. Roadside assistance is on the way, but I wanted to leave a half hour afuckinggo.
Uncle told the detective some things he didn't know. I now know that it was a gunshot wound; not the normal MO for a woman.
Unusual, but becoming more common, although a lot of female suicides by firearm will shoot themselves somewhere other than the head.
Also, no note, and Uncle had talked to her the day before and she was chatty...not the kind of behavior you expect then to not leave a note.
Her being extra chatty, or even seeming like she's doing really well is not unusual. People who have decided on their plan for suicide are often very happy at that point. They finally have a solution to the mess they see their lives as having become.
No note is not indicative of anything. Most people don't leave them.
And even when you get them, you still don't have the answers you want.
Thank you wolf.
The investigation is still open. The chatty thing: I don't know, much, really, but she was chatty and talking about her plans to file for divorce on Monday. Maybe we'll never know for sure.
We are having a memorial service here next Saturday. At least it will give us some closure.
My sister is being punished for being an exceptionally dedicatedl, hard-working, rockin' pediatric RN. She's been in transport for twenty years and wants to transfer to another dept. They are holding up her transfer for SIX MONTHS and she is going crazy.
She's been published, is a national speaker on ped. nursing, works on numerous committees pro bono and they do THIS to her.
Ya wanna know why nursing is recession-proof? Because they treat you like shit and tell you it's Easter.
Ya wanna know why nursing is recession-proof? Because they treat you like shit and tell you it's Easter.
??? Easter
I've heard of Pissing on my shoes and telling me it's raining, but I don't get the Easter bit
Oh great. Now my car is missing. This is just fucking wonderful.
I just got docked from an A down to a B on a paper in my class Faith in the World Seminar: The Holocaust, because I referenced Lockean individualism in an argument. The professor wrote "What is this?" next to it. Not my fault you don't know what that is you moron, go look it the fuck up.
Oh great. Now my car is missing. This is just fucking wonderful.
They towed your car in for service without telling you?
No, they towed it to the wrong friggin place omg.
Speaking of...your face appeared when I signed up, UT. How does that thing KNOW who we know if we didn't go to college or HS or work with them? Another friend from my old job that I haven't seen in a long time popped up, with nothing to associate him with me; I put no work info in.
Spooky. Not that I'm complaining.
Yah myspace does that to me.........."People I might Know". And I do. Scares the hell out of me, because it isn't limited to geographics either.
Wow jinx. That sucks!
If you let it, it goes thru your address book to find people.
Yah I could tell, but it is handy in finding all the people I am trying to forget.
No, they towed it to the wrong friggin place omg.
What now?? Are you at home or what?
??? Easter
I've heard of Pissing on my shoes and telling me it's raining, but I don't get the Easter bit
Easter is on my mind for some reason.
Teh resurrection. All that.
I'm in a morbid spiral of late.
What now?? Are you at home or what?
Yeah, I'm at home, my day is shot. They towed it to a dealership 15 miles away that has the same-ish name as the dealership 1.2 miles away. I had to sic jim on them to get them to tow it to the correct dealership where it will be fixed, but not until tomorrow now that they've fucked around all afternoon....
That feeling of "Dude, where's my fucking car?!" sucks ass. It's a good thing they found it quickly.... Jim was all "well who the hell took it?" and I'm like "uh, some dude with a flatbed".... gah
I just got docked from an A down to a B on a paper in my class Faith in the World Seminar: The Holocaust, because I referenced Lockean individualism in an argument. The professor wrote "What is this?" next to it. Not my fault you don't know what that is you moron, go look it the fuck up.
Ask him to clarify his comments. He may be suggesting that in the context of the field you're writing in an explanatory note may be in order, alternatively he may be querying its relevance.
If he is actually asking what the term means then he has no business marking that down, because it's not exactly an unknown term in general academia. Ask him.
@ jinx: honey, that right royally sucks.
Jinx, that is so quel dommage. It's a good thing that Jim knows the sun rises and sets on you otherwise that "some dude in a flatbed" remark would be grounds for a serious eye-rolling missy.
There is almost nothing that sucks more than car issues. <--hyperbole
I think I broke another goddamn toe. I'll post a picture to the bruises thread if I can be bothered to get around to it.
[size=1]Oh, and while I'm bitching: I've got the flu, a blocked duct in my boob, and my kid is off his damn rocker today. Goddammit.[/size]
I just found out something that broke my heart and made me want to kill someone.
Two years ago, my Dad was driving back from his nightly visit to his regular pub. He used to go in every evening, and nurse a single whiskey and water, sitting at the bar chatting to the regulars. He was very ill even by then, a year and a half into his disease. When he visited the pub, he'd have to park up and wait for about half an hour to get his breath back from the drive before going in. At his side on the passenger seat would be a portable oxygen cylinder and breathing apparatus.
He kept that routine going pretty much up until he was bed-ridden.
On this particular occasion (according to the pub landlady whom my brother met this afternoon) he left the pub, sat in his van to get his breath back after the walk from the pub, then drove off. He got stopped by police who, presumably because they could smell the one whiskey on his breath and because by now Dad looked like he wasn't taking care of himself, they said they needed to breathalyse him.
Dad said he couldn't. he could barely breath. He was by now, very fucking obviously sick. Very fucking obviously struggling for every goddamned breath. The bastard fucking, shit of a policeman, took him back to the station and because he 'refused' to give a breath test, they kept him in a cell overnight and wouldnt give him his fucking oxygen. I am so angry right now I could smash something. I want to scream.
That is fucking bullshit, Dana. Jesus, wtf is wrong with people? Your anger is justified. Knowing you, you will channel this into some meaningful way to make a difference. But it just really sucks.
Right now I want to channel it into a train journey to Bolton and fucking big showdown with the Police...but I am sure by morning my rage will have subsided enough to be rational again.
It will...but it's a tough thing to wait for morning. I think it helps that you're writing about it.
It does help actually. I think it's an eminently sensible part of myself that draws me to post on stuff like this. By the time I've talked it through on here I usually feel much better/clearer/calmer. Like now for instance.
Aw man, that's just brutal Dana. :(
Good Lord, that is awful. Too little human decency in law enforcement.
Ugh - Sorry to hear that Dana. Sometimes....
: Bites tongue :
That is awful Dana. I'm sorry.
Write something for the paper. Things like that need to be exposed.
That's horrible, Dana! Isn't access to medications a basic human right, even in jail?
Do you have the names of the officers involved? A very public shaming might be just the ticket.
Unfortunately i have absolutely no details. Dad never said anything about it. This was the landlady at his local pub. All I know is what I posted. That it happened about two years ago, and that he apparently was held overnight without his oxygen.
Mum wants me to drop it. I haven't talked to Mart yet. I am considering paying a visit to Bolton police station at some point in the next few weeks. I want to see if they have a record of him being held. If he was never charged, I don't know if they'd keep the record.
Lil Lookout has had some issues become more of a concern over the last six months that we just wrote off as attitude and motivation issues. He is very intelligent so his growing aversion to reading we simply chalked up to being lazy. He can run through his math tables verbally but completely panics if he has to write them. There are quite a few other things that taken separately mean nothing and that is exactly what we saw - nothing.
The kid has always been truly happy with a ball at his feet and that is what stopped me in my tracks. I always said soccer is his deal and when he's bored or burned out he's done no questions asked. He's a phenomenal player and over the last few months he has continued the great performances but you could see the joy was gone. Then the meltdowns started.
During a recent penalty shoot out the keeper blocked one of his shots. He came apart at the seams as soon as he got to the touchline. He was sobbing and shaking and just laid down and covered up with a blanket. WTF? The keeper made a nice save, no problem. It took me the rest of the day to actually get him to open up - something that has been impossible to get him to do recently. Long story short(er) is he heard people laughing at him for missing and he actually heard one of the dads (a true dick) tell him he sucks. The only real problem is that it didn't happen. Everyone cheered and told him good try. He still didn't believe it when I replayed the video for him. Strange. A definite cause for concern for me.
That night I was in bed thinking it over and things kind of slipped into place hard enough to make my eyeballs click. The reason he gave for his meltdown over reading the week before was because he knew I'd laugh at him. The problem with math was because his teacher laughed at him. The reason he's been clamming up on the field is he'd rather do nothing than make a mistake and have everyone laugh or yell. Apparently he hasn't been playing at recess for fear of making a mistake.
WTF have I done to my kid? He's absolutely cracking under the pressure to be successful. But then I thought about it more and it just didn't explain it. The kid really has no pressure. Failure or success has always been praised in the same way in our house - it's the effort and the behavior that is praised, not the result.
I made an appointment with a psychologist we're very comfortable with having used him ourselves for marriage counselling. He specializes in children but we liked him well enough to use him for ourselves. Initial work and testing came back with the result that Lil Lookout was off the charts, serious problem, do something right now in the areas of anxiety and depression. WTF? He's 7. The doc showed us his initial workups and pointed out they were consistent with ADHD. His concern was that while anxiety and depression are usually biproducts of ADHD, they can also be the source of ADHD like results in children who are not truly ADHD. The chicken and the egg story. Through extensive observation and testing and numerous surveys filled out by parents, grandparents, teachers, and family friends the diagnosis is back and absolutely everything consistently points to ADHD.
We've heard plenty of horror stories about kids thrown on maintenance drugs for ADHD and the like so we don't really want to go down that road. The doctor has been really good and has helped us create a non-drug plan for Lil Lookout. Therapy, behavioral stuff, and blahblahblah. It all sounds really good and we said let's do it. The doc said ok, but then came back to the meds issue. He said he'll go along with the no meds plan right now and he believes Lil Lookout will see some positive results BUT he has absolutely ZERO doubt that Lil Lookout will end up on meds within the next year or two. Because of our previous experiences with this guy we know he isn't a "drugs are the answer" kind of guy otherwise I'd just write it off as the normal infatuation with chemical fixes for everything.
The doc then pulled out another file and started showing us the notes. He explained that it was his son's file (he uses another doc for him). His kid is ADHD and his charts are nearly identical to Lil Lookout's. You really could switch them and not really notice much. His first displayed problems at age 6 but not liking the meds route he tried everything else. Finally at age 13 the family caved and tried the meds. within a semester the kid had a complete turnaround. The kid later on questioned why they didn't do it sooner because he said for the first time in his life he was happy. He could actually function and focus with the rest of the world around him. His kid is now 21 and went off the meds 3 years ago. Everything was fine for about a year and then the kid came back begging to be put back on meds because he could feel the difference and everything was starting to spiral out of control for him at college. He went back on and has been fine ever since.
I've talked to a psychologist friend of mine, my aunt who is also a child psychologist, and another friend who deals with behavioral and learning disabilities in a local school. They've all said the same thing: Do it. These are all people who know Lil Lookout and care for him. They are all professionals in the field. None of them is a big fan of thowing pills down everyone's throat.
For a week my wife and I have talked about it and we see a lot of great reasons to try the meds but we're still afraid to do it and we have no rational reason other than we are afraid to start our kid on meds he'll need for years and possibly forever.
Where is the magic 8 ball when you need it?
I'm really sorry you're going through this, Lookout. As someone who developed asthma as a child, I simply ask you - would you be so divided in your mind if you were talking about asthma meds? Also for the rest of a life - but making such a difference to quality of life?
:idea: Um, wow. I had not even thought of it in that manner. The fact is that LL does have asthma and allergy medication that he's taken to varying degrees since he was 3. After the umpteenth time we took him in for breathing issues the doctor said, "the kid needs XYZ medication" and we did it. While it bothers me that he has been dependent on medication that is simply because I wish he wasn't. But it helps him to breathe which is a good thing, so we keep the meds going. End of story.
It is entirely possible that my issue here is not entirely the pill but the idea of why the pill may be necessary. I need to ponder that for a bit.
Lookout - Took me months to agree to put my son on meds. He was on them for about 6 to 9 months. He stopped taking them and has been pretty much ok since. that was a few years ago.
Too many kids get put needlessly onto meds for 'problems' which aren't medical.
But...some kids need those meds. From your description, your little boy's brain chemistry is painting him a very hostile and unforgiving world. Sounds like your therapist's experience with his own son is worth some thought. You may be able to save li'l lookout a lot of unhappiness.
The world isn't hostile and unforgiving?
Meds please. :)
Lookout, it's not necessarily a life sentence, growing up is hard enough as it is. Meds can help the sufferer while they deal with the regular growing up stuff and aquire coping strategies. As they mature and have made sense of some of their little bit of the world, many people are able to wean themselves off the meds. Michael Phelps for example.
I'm a knee-jerk anti-meds person too, but in this case it sounds like meds may be in the best interests of LL right now.
God luck to all of you, I hope LL feels happier soon.
Lookout-
As far as little lookout is concerned:I would definitely go with a second opinion before meds. It could not hurt. And I think it's worth it. Please take him to someone else to get another diagnosis, this sounds irregular, maybe he just needs time and therapy to become his natural self again. This could be a depressive phase that even normal people go through.
Different therapists advise different things and unfortunately, some are more acute than others. Second opinion that situation, stat!
Dana: If The Bill is anything to go by, there WILL be paperwork, and lots of it. Refusing a prisoner medical treatment is outrageous, and if you have the time and energy to spare I would encourage you to look into it; but don't spend time you could better use elsewhere. That cop does need a boot up the bum.
I imagine you'd have the political connections to at least find out in advance the name of the paperwork you are looking for - maybe the "custody records" or something. Knowing what you need before you face the bureaucracy will help.
Lookout: best of luck with LL. That lad rocks and I hope he comes through this all intact. I agree with your opinions and default avoidance of meds, but if he needs them, he needs them, and I am sure you'd be using them as part of a complete cognitive/behavioural programme and get him off the pills ASAP. Give the lad a :comfort: from us all.
Just learned a friemd underwent a mastectomy for breast cancer. It wasn't at all advanced, but there were several other "dubious" spots that would need to be watched and she's a single mom of two with a loser ex, huge un-dumpable mortgage, full-time job..... so she didn't want the constant fight and worry and uncertainty and chance of missing something and leaving her children.... :(
Sounds like she made a tough, but good decision monster. I'm sure you'll be able to give her plenty of support through the next while till she gets used to the way her body is now. I hope she's coping ok with it all. I can't imagine going through that process.
She hardly told anybody either, so it's hard to know when to step in and when to back off. I taught math to one of her daughters yesterday and she seemed to be holding up well, laughing and getting on with it (I heard there were a few meltdowns on the day of surgery...). here's hoping the worst is past, I don't know if she'll have to do chemo or anything. She has her mom with her, al least, though, who seems to be a tower of strength.
my thoughts are with her, monster. I can't imagine...I only have a few scars but it has changed the way I look at myself---to lose a breast---I don't know if I could have held up. Peace to her and her family.
I'm sure she's glad to have you there for her, monster, even if she's not making a big deal about it.
I'm collecting Jim Shore figurines and I can't help myself!
I made a total rookie mistake today. (You don't just run backups. You also do test restores periodically to make sure they're running PROPERLY.)
Heh. At a previous employer, they were migrating email over to a new server, and somehow got it wrong, deleting every single email account in the company, along with all associated emails, addressbooks, etc.
It was only then that they discovered they'd been doing backups incorrectly for four years. "Test restore? What's that?"
Which is to say, at least rookie mistakes still way better than firing mistakes, right?
I'm collecting Jim Shore figurines and I can't help myself!
But, but, they're so, so, acceptable/normal/middle class.:eek:
Hell, they won't offend a n y o n e.
Dr. called--wants to see me re: my sonogram results.
probably means uterine cysts, ovarian cysts, cancer, or something else wrong in there.
I'm a bit scared.
*hugs Cloud* oh hon, that sucks. It'll likely be nothing major. When you seeing him?
manana. just trying not to obsess over it until I hear the diagnosis.
good luck, cloud. Let us know.
Sending good thoughts your way, Cloud!
Cloud, it's probably just a smudge on the reading, they need to retake it. Or something relatively straightforward.
Wait and see. Till then, read a good book or drink some coco.
Dr. called--wants to see me re: my sonogram results.
probably means uterine cysts, ovarian cysts, cancer, or something else wrong in there.
I'm a bit scared.
You know it's probably just cysts and they'll biopsy them. The worst they might end up doing is a hysterectomy (sp?) and of course the upside of that is no more periods. That's something good to think about isn't it?
Stay positive. Don't think the worst. It wont help at all.
I'll be thinking of you matey. xox
Hang in there Cloud. Mine were cysts, they took them out, still had a kid, and she only came out with two heads.
Hang in there Cloud. Mine were cysts, they took them out, still had a kid, and she only came out with two heads.
Bonus. Everyone knows two heads are better than one.
Sorry to hear that Cloud. I hope it's a minor deal.
me too! Keeping my fingers . . . er, legs, crossed!
Hysterectomy. Do. Not. Want!
Really? I've often thought I might like to have one just because I don't need those organs anymore (after the baby of course). Well, not really like to have one, but that it wouldn't be the end of the world if I did.
I know a lot of women don't feel that way, but I don't understand why. If you're finished using it, what do you need it for? Is it the emotional thing of having part of your womanhood removed?
My mom had one, and she did great. But if you don't want one Cloud, then I'll hope that you don't get one. :)
Hang in there Cloud. Mine were cysts, they took them out, still had a kid, and he only came out with two heads.
fixed that for ya. :D
Really? I've often thought I might like to have one just because I don't need those organs anymore (after the baby of course). Well, not really like to have one, but that it wouldn't be the end of the world if I did.
I know a lot of women don't feel that way, but I don't understand why. If you're finished using it, what do you need it for? Is it the emotional thing of having part of your womanhood removed?
Depends on how you look with a mustache, from what I've heard.[/mr. sensitive]
Really? I've often thought I might like to have one just because I don't need those organs anymore (after the baby of course). Well, not really like to have one, but that it wouldn't be the end of the world if I did.
I know a lot of women don't feel that way, but I don't understand why. If you're finished using it, what do you need it for? Is it the emotional thing of having part of your womanhood removed?
After a hysterectomy, you may experience the following hysterectomy side effects:
• Hot flashes
• Fatigue
• Insomnia
• Depression
• Urinary problems
• Weight gain
• Headaches
• Irritability and anxiety
• Heart palpitations
• Heart disease
• Vaginal dryness
• Pain in the joints
• Memory lapses
• Osteoporosis
• Hair loss
• Low sex drive and painful sexual intercourse
• Dizziness and nervousness
Hey Cloud, hope it isn't that, but even if it is, we'll all mail you chicken soup. And cookies. And cocks.
Good luck, Cloud! It's probably only cysts, don't worry too much.
Usually with hysterectomies these days they leave the ovaries, which means that most of the side effects are moot points because they were related to removing the ovaries.
Today I'm upset because two days ago I tried to extend an olive branch to a friend I had a falling-out with, and he hasn't responded. :(
Hang in there, Tiki...give it some time.
Thanks, Sycamore. I'm trying really hard.
You know those people who are always telling you to live in the moment? Well, living in the moment isn't that awesome if the moment SUCKS ASS.
then look to the future - Adopt a "This too shall pass" mentality....
if it helps that is. Sorry you aren't happy
Thanks, Classicman. I've always had a hard time escaping the moment... I've wondered if it's related to having temporal lobe epilepsy, as my memory and sense of elapsed time are really wonky. Who knows, it's probably just me being neurotic.
so the word: gigantic uterous; large ovarian cysts, possibly cancerous (still testing). Need an MRI and CT scan, and . . .
Everything must go! Hysterectomy, oopherectomy, and whatever other ectomies clean out all those organs.
Needless to say, I am a bit upset now.
O fuck! Good luck! I hope it's not cancerous, and that everything goes SMOOTHLY.
Oh Cloud, I'm sorry to hear you're going through this. Maybe it will help to think of it as "operable" rather than "must go?" Better to have it gone, rather than hanging out in your body possibly being cancerous, right?
yeah. not the end of the world, certainly. I'm just a bit shell shocked right now.
Sure you are. Keep positive thoughts, because though it sucks, I bet you'll find it's all OK.
Sending warm thoughts your way...
So what? You don't need those goddamn organs taking up your valuable middle. Nothing but fuss and bother for year after year after year. Out with em.
AND, I say -- is somebody afraid of a little body modification? Of course not. If you told somebody you did this by choice, they'd think you were bad-ass.
Amen, UT. :notworthy:
Cloud's gonna rock it!
heehee. that's why I love this place and all of you!
Cloud I was gonna say how much that sucked but UT made such a good case for it, I'm kinda sorry I don't have uterus. You have us mostly supportive, in our warped way, dwellars to fall back on!
Bloody hell Cloud, that's no fun. Hugs from me, and a big sloppy kiss from Pilau.*
*actually that's probably quite gross: he ate his supper about an hour ago so he currently has a bad case of tripe breath...
Well I want a big sloppy kiss from Pilau. He's my buddy. I've written poetry for him, for pete's sake. ;)
You lost me there. Who's pete? Do you mean PETA?
I thought you called it pete, HLJ. Must have been someone else.
Cloud - hey! Let's hope it's not cancerous; let's burn that bridge when we get there. In the meantime, soak up the cellar-good-vibe-ism because it works, chica, it works!!
:hugs:
Cloud, I'm so sorry to hear this news. I'm still hoping for the best for you.
Tony, you have a way with words! :notworthy
Bummer, Cloud. Still, it's a quick weightloss plan.... and UT said it best. Maybe you could get one of your ovaries encased in glass and then suspend it from one of your piercings?
um. no. thanks for the thought, though!
Cloud, nothing much I can add here except good vibes. I think all the guys (& gals) have come up with the options for positive thinking - out with it, stomp on it and get on with your life! :flower:
Hugs and good luck, Cloud. Will be thinking about you!
(As a silly aside, I wonder how many internal organs, collectively, we Dwellars are missing?)
internal organs . . . limbs . . . external organs . . . eyes . . .
. . . brains.
:D
Woof Woof! Slurp Slobber Slurp [SIZE="1"]wag wag[/SIZE] Woof!
Hi buddy! He's a good boy! :)
the kids and I have matching colds and I feel nauseous.
So, I'll say 'stomach' for 200.
First your shoulder, now your stomach.
make up your mind!
Maybe it's all in his mind.
First your shoulder, now your stomach.
make up your mind!
Yeah, I'm running out of available spots.:(
Marsellus Wallace: What now? I'll tell you what now...
--Pulp Fiction
Lil Lookout has had some issues become more of a concern over the last six months that we just wrote off as attitude and motivation issues. ~snip
Any progress? :(
I just talked to my boss. She's cutting my overtime. Can't do it any more. It was just a few hours a week, but it added up. This will be about a 5-10% cut in income. :(
I guess the up side is that I'll have a little more time with my family.
Sorry glatt. :(
Today: I had a disagreement with a friend, and I miss her, but she won't talk to me and there is nothing I can do to make it better. I don't even know if she's doing OK right now, and it really really sucks. :sniff:
I just talked to my boss. She's cutting my overtime. Can't do it any more. It was just a few hours a week, but it added up. This will be about a 5-10% cut in income. :(
I guess the up side is that I'll have a little more time with my family.
Will you give them a discounted OT rate since they are family? I'm not certain they'll help you make up that shortfall.
Will you give them a discounted OT rate since they are family? I'm not certain they'll help you make up that shortfall.
Actually, it will be full OT rate to the family. OT kicks in after 40 hours in a week, and I'm with them for over 100 hours a week. I should charge them double time. Although I'm asleep on the job for much of that time.
Lonely, widowed parents. And not a damn thing you can do for them.
*hugs Pie* oh honey. That's no fun.
Says here they sold my repo'd car at auction for $14,200.
It was a $25k car with 10K miles on it, I could have gotten better than that with a hand-written "for sale" sign in a supermarket parking lot.
It means I now currently owe Nissan $10,229.17.
It's 100% my fault, I just hope they accept a 5-year plan on this debt.
I wish somebody would steal my identity. The joke would be on them, they'd be fucked!
you wouldn't have been able to produce a title unless you paid the remainder of the loan off, though.
that sucks, T. I don't know what they'll accept as far as repayment terms go. You'd have been better off if it had been stolen.
Damn UT, are you serious? :(
That really sucks. I had no idea that repossession worked that way, but I suppose it makes sense.
Uh, you might want to consider a BK toad. It sounds like your situation is pretty well screwed, you don't need to be paying for stuff you couldn't afford to keep. At least doing that will seal off the unpaid debt with a clean break.
What's a bk toad? *scrating head*
"a bankruptcy, Undertoad."
I thought it was the new Burger King sandwich.
mmm. Extra tartar sauce please.
mmm. Extra tartar sauce please.
hungry? have it your way
It is toad mating season, after all.
I thought it was the new Burger King sandwich.
bwahahahahaa.
Thanks clod. I'm such a dufus sometimes. :o
hungry? have it your way
:mg: :biglaugha
Says here they sold my repo'd car at auction for $14,200.
It was a $25k car with 10K miles on it, I could have gotten better than that with a hand-written "for sale" sign in a supermarket parking lot.
It means I now currently owe Nissan $10,229.17.
It's 100% my fault, I just hope they accept a 5-year plan on this debt.
I wish somebody would steal my identity. The joke would be on them, they'd be fucked!
NEW HACK IDEA! Instead of being an identity thief you could be an identity pusher. Force an identity on someone and watch em crawl. Maybe make a movie. Oh my gosh... what am I thinking?
A book? mmm.. mebbee. :eyebrow:
UT, I'm sorry about the mess with your car. What a pain in the BUTT!
Lumberjim, the sandwich picture made me LOL. Nicely done!
I'm upset because this bloody headache is not responding to painkillers and I'm STILL dizzy and nauseated (although the blurred vision has gone away, thank the gods)
lie down and stop looking at a computer screen.
;) I was. Til my alarm clock went off. Then I got up, dropped in here to say good morning, and am about to go run errands til it's time for PT. Have a great day!
you're not taking care of yourself...... rule #1 :p
Roto Rooter is going to get a significant portion of my savings today.
Ugh.
And my ears are ringing from lack of sleep. I keep having horrible nightmares and wake up. It's not worth it to go back to sleep just to be tortured by vampires.
NEW HACK IDEA! Instead of being an identity thief you could be an identity pusher. Force an identity on someone and watch em crawl. Maybe make a movie. Oh my gosh... what am I thinking?
A book? mmm.. mebbee. :eyebrow:
That's actually a very interesting idea. Sounds like something I'd come up with, and then never follow up on.
That's actually a very interesting idea. Sounds like something I'd come up with, and then never follow up on.
Yea, but how much money would it cost you to change all that letter head and Id's and everything with your money in it? All the while some homeless guy who use to make 50k goes without a meal.
Roto Rooter is going to get a significant portion of my savings today.
Ugh.
And my ears are ringing from lack of sleep. I keep having horrible nightmares and wake up. It's not worth it to go back to sleep just to be tortured by vampires.
See, now those are the kinds of dreams I like. Vivid, scary and lots of vampires.
Bruce has the whole batboy motif going on today.
Oh, and ha ha on the sig line. :blush:
See, now those are the kinds of dreams I like. Vivid, scary and lots of vampires.
It wasn't a sexy vampire - I would like that kind, too - it was a murderous female vampire and I was really afraid of her.
Oh, rats. Just had another email forward that makes me sad: this one on behalf of a woman losing a battle with cancer and must find a home for her
Samoyeds. Saw the photo and they're beautiful, but I cannot adopt any. :(
If anyone is in the Atlanta, GA area and wants the info then PM me. I'd love to post a followup message in the happy thread.
Red tape. Ugh.
Use your light manipulating superpowers to turn it yellow, and get on with your day. :D
Use your light manipulating superpowers to turn it yellow, and get on with your day. :D
Unfortunately, the Power of the Light is no match for the Dark Side of the Force.
[COLOR=White](Search your feelings, you know it is true.)[/COLOR]
Father meets son. Death ensues.
Stupid credit card companies and the shit they get away with. You'd be better off borrowing money from a friggin' loan shark.
No you wouldn't. Trust me.
How are those kneecaps healing up, Dana?
Oh y'know...sudden cold weather's fun as always :P
I've lived - and once I'd got back to the world of Normal, worked - in communities where formal lines of credit simply do not exist. There are door to door credit companies operating on the estates in the area I represent, the levels of interest are shocking. These people exist from one £200 loan to the next, and once that credit line is established it is pretty much a permanent fixture.
They are 'legitimate' but their methods aren't always above board. Their agents are self-employed and not vetted. Threats of physical violence are commonplace.
A local largescale landlord got tired of the amount of rent-debt on his books. People were falling behind, not dealing with it and he's left with the choice of evicting them and losing what's owed and the fallow period in between tenants, or letting them run up further debt. He outsourced his debt collection to a private debt collection agency. One guy I know was told if he didn;t come up with £500 by the end of the week someone would come round and "put an axe in [his] missus' cunt".
'Credit' means something very different to the underclass.
CC cos may not threaten you in that particular way, but they do threaten you, and the way they jack up the % rate, even if you are always on time and then miss paying by one day, and get away with charging exhorbitant fees for all kinds of things. It really is a racket. I don't have CCs anymore. I cut mine up years ago. But I've been trying to help a couple of people I know with theirs. One person has been harrassed like you would not believe, and the CC co is wrong about her payments being late or missed. Her bank statements prove it. Do you think they care, or that they have been willing to do anything about reversing the charges and % rate? that would be a resounding NO.
of course not - thats how they make their money. If you pay on time every time and carry no balance then they are LOSING money on you (well me) They are not in the business to lose money.
If you are not making regular payments or are consistently late they are aware that they are probably going to get stuck for all the money they lent you. They jack up the rates hoping to get as much as they can.
I hate it and had it done to me years ago, but thats their justification. Remember, They are not your friends.
No they aren't. My point in comparing them to loan sharks, is that they ARE loan sharks. The practices they use should be illegal.
Charging higher risk borrowers higher rates should be illegal? Calling delinquent borrowers for payment? What exactly are they doing that should be illegal?
If they really are playing outside the lines it should be fairly simple to remedy.
If you go to the supermarket checkout and don't have enough money because you picked up too much stuff, they should lower the prices and throw in some free stuff too... and green stamps. :rolleyes:
Charging higher risk borrowers higher rates should be illegal? Calling delinquent borrowers for payment? What exactly are they doing that should be illegal?
If they really are playing outside the lines it should be fairly simple to remedy.
That's not what I'm saying. Of course people have a right to collect the money that is owed to them. But CC cos will raise your % rate even if you
haven't paid late or missed a payment. They will do it for NO REASON at all. And charging 49.9%? Why would that be legal
at all? Regardless of of whether you paid late or not?
But CC cos will raise your % rate even if you haven't paid late or missed a payment. They will do it for NO REASON at all. And charging 49.9%? Regardless of of whether you paid late or not?
Then you, as a quality consumer, have the option to go to another company. Simple solution. FWIW, this has never happened to me. In fact the companies I have dealt with have raised my credit and never has my rate been increased.
Insomnia sucks. I do not deal well with stress.
You might not think you do but your strength is apparent. Hope you get some good sleep soon, Clod.
My brother and sister-in-law. My ex was in a motorcycle accident the day before Christmas. I went and got him and brought him here until he healed up. I found one crutch here for him to use, my sister said she found the other one. My brother just called to say he wanted his crutches back. WTF? When I tried to engage in a conversation about it, I was bitched out about a dolly that he says I lost two years ago. I remember returning it, but I still offered to buy him another one anyway. In fact, I have REPEATEDLY tried to give him money for that fucking dolly, and he has repeatedly refused the money. So now he wants to throw THAT in my face?
When we went to their house for the holidays, my ex decorated the crutches with ribbon so they looked like candycanes. How in the hell could he have gotten them from my brother's garage when he decorated them at my mom's house before we went over there?
It pisses me off, because he won't even discuss it with me. Fucking asshole. I didn't even deny they were his either, I was trying to figure out what the hell he was talking about and how we could resolve the issue.
Sounds like you oughta just let Merc kick his ass one time to hone his attitude.
FCKING CHASE AUTO FUCKINGFUCKARGHWHYCAN'TYOUJUSTTAKEMYPAYMENTWHENISENDITIN...I HAVE AUTO PAYMENTS THROUGH YOU FUCKERS FOR CHRIST'S SAKE, WHY CAN YOU NOT FIGURE OUT YOUR OWN DAMN SYSTEM...ARGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH
Try threatening them with a lawyer. Perhaps that will get someone's attention enough to straighten it out once and for all.
HA! Asshole had to call and apologize to me because they found his crutches. I know that hurt.
A buddy of mine had transplants a few years ago. He has diabetes.
A recent lab test looks like he may be rejecting the pancreas. They are upping his immuno suppressants to try to push back the rejection.
Prayers etc. welcome.
Sorry to hear that, dar. I hope the drugs work. :(
They will do it for NO REASON at all. And charging 49.9%?
You might want to look into that. Most states have a max allowable interest rate in the mid to high 20's.
You might want to look into that. Most states have a max allowable interest rate in the mid to high 20's.
I was on the phone with them today. Offered them a settlement. She'll know in a couple of days if they accept it.
Sending positive energy dar's way, for his friend.
I went out last night with... well, the guy I'm going out with. And after the movie, I wanted a beer, so we went to a bar, and there at the bar was the guy I am not at all over.
Fuuuuuuck.
Today, I am kind of a mess.
How long will it take? I am tired of being an emotional cripple.
Hey Dar, here's love and strength for your friend.
Hey Tiki - maybe you're not meant to be with the one you're with if the one you're not with had that much effect on you jsut seeing him at a bar? Just sayin. Cuz I know. Been there. Am still there. Aargh.
I know this is going to sound extremely cold and callous, but it's not meant to. If you are tired of being an emotional cripple (I know you arent really, you're just heart sore) then.....stop. You are the final arbiter of your own mind.
I know what you're saying Dana - I'm just too emotionally lazy to get out of my current situation. As for Tiki, well I can't really say.....
Tiki's situation was complicated. It's not anymore... now it's just a process of recovering. Telling me to "just stop" is about as helpful as telling someone with a pulled muscle to just stop hurting, if they don't like it.
I am "just stopping"... by taking time and trying to be kind to myself, including starting to date again. I lost my husband and my love. It's only been six months... how fast does heartbreak heal for you?
Running into him on this date was just unexpected. Yeah, I'm not meant to be with the guy I was with, but he was a nice distraction. Dinner and a movie, and then a drink before bed. Like wearing something nice when you feel bad, going out when you're sad can be a way to ease the heartsore.
I'm not a permanent cripple, but I'm hurt enough that seeing him left me shaking. I want this part, the raw and tender part of getting over it, to be over. All I can do, the one thing that I have power over, is carry on with my life and give it time.
Normal people can't just shut it off, and I wouldn't like the person I am if I cared so shallowly that I could.
If this isn't the correct thread for venting what's got me upset, let me know and I'll make a new one.
The only thing that will fix your pain is time. Oh, and try not to go where this other person hangs out. That may help in the long run.
Yeah, I was kind of hoping to not see him around! But, it's a small city, and we both live in the same neighborhood. And then of course it turns out my date knew him... they worked together... adding awkward to awkward. Sometimes, this town, it feels like there's no getting away.
Time is time. I want it to happen sooner than later, but all I can really do is wait.
Ok. Well, by all means ignore the caveat that was meant to soften that advice. I do believe that to a large extent, we have much greater control over our emotional state than we usually recognise or use. I try to remind myself of that when i am struggling with something. It helps me.
But hey. Whatever.
Like we said in another thread: one foot in front of the other. Yeah, it hurts, but it will get better.
Dana, I'm sorry if this comes off as harsh, but seriously, glib armchair psychologist advice usually assumes that the person it's being given to is doing something "wrong". I have a therapist. A good one.
If you believe you have some profound insights into recovering from divorce or heartbreak, by all means, offer them up. However, "stop" is patently ridiculous, condescending, and ignorant. There is no way to soften that up with a disclaimer about not meaning to sound cold and callous. It just makes you sound sheltered. I'm sure you have your own experiences to draw from, but seriously... "stop"? Did you really think about that one?
People have to grieve the loss of important relationships. It's a normal part of the process. It's hard, and it sucks, but people don't get through the grieving process by walling off the hurt.
If, six months after the end of our relationship and two months after the end of our friendship, I run into him and it makes me feel an emotional wreck, but the rest of the time I am a fully functional mother, friend, businesswoman, and homeowner, I think I'm not doing half badly in my process of getting over it.
I still love him. If I could just "stop", what kind of monster would I be?
*sighs* Tiki, my choice of words was not in order to indicate ease, but to indicate a conscious act. Like I said, telling myself things like that helped me.
But hey, what do I know right?
[eta] incidentally, I don't recall ever saying you should suddenly stop caring.
Tiki...you post in a forum and you're going to get all kinds of replies and advice. Dana was only relating her experience. I think there will come a time where you can just "stop." It's obviously not yet, but you need to realize that it's going to be OK to do that. From your last sentence it seems that you find "stopping" to be a guilt-ridden idea, but someday you will stop because it's time to move on. Who knows when that will be for you? I think Dana was offering one idea; choose to do with it what you will but don't think for a second Dana was taking your situation lightly.
You might know a LOT. But yeah, what you said didn't really convey what you know, and it seemed to assume that I'm not doing what I need to do. Stop?
I am stopping. I stopped seeing him. I stopped calling him. I stopped having things around (other than his children) that remind me of him. And, if I keep it up, eventually I will stop loving him.
But RIGHT FUCKING NOW, I walked into a bar (my bar!) last night and he was sitting there with his eyes and his hands and his smile and all the things I have not yet stopped loving.
And that was a bit upsetting.
Shawnee, clearly I misunderstood the purpose of this thread. I thought it was for venting, not flippant advice. Dana didn't relate her experience, she said "If you are tired of being an emotional cripple then.....stop." I find that ridiculous, and said so.
I don't find any guilt in getting over lost love. It's simply not a light switch, to flip on and off at will, and honestly I wouldn't want it to be.
Oh I understand that Tiki. It's bound to be. I haven't followed the ins and outs of your story. From your post in here it sounded like you were at the end of a much longer journey and that you felt somehow buried under it a little more generally than that. It was your idea of yourself as an 'emotional cripple' that I was picking up on. That made it sound as if you felt at the mercy of something that had a greater control over your life and happiness than you.
[eta] It's not about flicking a light switch. It's about recognising the powerful tool you have at your disposal and turning it to your advantage. It's possible to be utterly heart broken and at the same time detached enough to recognise ways to ease the pain.
And the advice was not flippant. I stand by it as the best way to deal with grief. But then I would.
Nope, just one little ton-of-bricks moment. I haven't really related my whole story, since it's been going on for longer than I've been here. But, that again is kind of the problem with glib advice... if you don't really know what it's about, assuming you know what someone should do is a bit foolish. Again, I'm sorry if I sound harsh, but I wasn't expecting to vent in a thread that's for venting and then have someone tell me that if I don't like the fallout from my divorce and heartbreak, just stop. LOL! Sort of like telling someone who's getting foreclosed on to just pay their mortgage.
No hard feelings.
Then I'm confused as to why you'd think that makes you an emotional cripple. Or was that just self-deprecating humour?
[eta] It's not about flicking a light switch. It's about recognising the powerful tool you have at your disposal and turning it to your advantage. It's possible to be utterly heart broken and at the same time detached enough to recognise ways to ease the pain.
And the advice was not flippant. I stand by it as the best way to deal with grief. But then I would.
... and you assume I am not doing that, why?
I don't LIKE the process I'm going through, but it seems from what you've said as if your approach would be "suck it up and don't talk about it." I believe in acknowledging my feelings, in order to move through them, even though sometimes they do feel overwhelming.
Perhaps you could talk more about how you got through your grieving process, to give me some context.
I have been through grief before. I have found that the most helpful thing for me is simply knowing that it will get better. Even if it never goes away completely, it will get to a point where it's not ever-present, and eventually it will be a small part of my life, something that gives me an occasional pang, rather than a broad ache.
Then I'm confused as to why you'd think that makes you an emotional cripple. Or was that just self-deprecating humour?
Because, just as someone with a sprained ankle is crippled until it heals, so is someone with a broken heart. If I was not in the midst of this transition in my life, walking into a room and seeing an ex would not have taken the wind out of me.
I'm sorry Tiki. I got the wrong end of the stick when you said:
How long will it take? I am tired of being an emotional cripple.
I thought you were tired of where you were at and were looking for a way to break through it. Having got tired of where I was at, I attempted to consciously take control of my state of mind. To lesser or greater extent depending on how much I was dealing with at any one time, it helped.
I'm not talking about this with you any more. I am clearly not communicating my point very well. It was something that helped me. But it's of no use if I can't communicate it to you.
No, I was just basically tired of still being in process, and complaining about how long it's taking.
Things are getting better. I'm not wracked with grief when I get up in the morning, or when I get into an empty bed at night. I don't cry all day anymore... some days I don't cry at all. I am enjoying time with my friends. I have a crush... a small one, but to me that shows I'm healing, that I have space in my heart to feel that way about someone new. I'm looking forward to things again.
I'm not in stasis, just complaining about the process. I have a long time of loving to get over.
The hardest thing, for me, is not to hope. His face lit up when he saw me. He knows I go to that bar, and he knows I have Monday and Tuesday nights free. I think about hope, and how hope holds me back. I know that if I indulge in it, I'm still hanging on to something that's over, and I can't do that. So, I open my hand and let that strand drop. One less thing connecting me to him.
Wow Tiki. I am so sorry you are hurting. Losing someone you still love is hard, the process is hard, it takes time. Sending good healing energy your way.
Not speaking for Dana, but from what she said, it seems to me she was talking about the concept that we create our own reality, and we have the ability to change that reality. That is not saying that you aren't doing everything in your power to do that, but maybe to realize that, in the moment, you can change your feelings, your desires, your intentions, your whatever. But you have to be aware of that in the moment. It is a principle of witchcraft and other spiritual traditions. My favorite definition of magic is that of Dion Fortune, the act of changing consciousness at will. There is a saying my old AA sponsor used to say to me all the time, change occurs in the moment of consciousness. If you have ever read the book The Way of the Peaceful Warrior, Dan Millman explains that concept quite well, over and over and over in different ways.
I know for me, it is very difficult to do that with regard to personal relationships. It's hard for me to understand how some people can just shake things off so easily, because I can't. It does help me though to remember that I actually DO have the ability to do that. It doesn't mean you don't still feel, or that you turn your feelings on and off like a faucet, it just means that you can direct the energy in a different, more positive way. I find it incredibly helpful, when I'm very depressed (which I have a serious problem with sometimes) to read books that empower me, like books about magic or the occult, or self-help, spiritual books. I don't know if you're already doing that, and it might not help you, it just helps me.
That sounds painful.
hmmm, I think it sounds powerful, and healing. Maybe painful as well, but still empowering.
Thanks sugar. That is pretty much what I was trying to say (minus the witchcraft:P).
I also have an intermittent problem with depression and your AA sponsor was so right: change occurs in the moment of consciousness. But not just change, also peace. Recognising what you can and cannot change and reaching a liveable compact with both.
Thanks, Sugarpop. I grew up in AA, the daughter of an alcoholic, and went to many meetings myself.
I don't really buy into consciously changing my feelings... I believe in feeling them fully, appreciating them for what they are, and then letting them go. They may still be there, but once I'm not hanging on to it, I'm free to move on to other emotions. It's gotten me through some incredibly difficult times. I won't go into detail but I faced some challenges, growing up. I've battled despair and anxiety, suicidal ideation, self-injury and other self-destructive urges, some exacerbated by OCD. Working through them as a young adult helped gain me some pretty functional skills for coping with loss and grief. In a way, mourning the loss of a major love relationship is not all that different from mourning the death of a loved one, except for the illusion of control.
I've been heartbroken before. I know I will be OK, it's just that I want to be OK right now, and last night was one of the less OK nights I've had in a while. :) For a moment, I would have given anything to NOT have been on a date, so I could go sit next to him and talk to him and smell his smell. But that's part and parcel of the illusion of control... it would feed the hope. Someday I'll be glad to see him, but it won't be because I am hoping he will love me back. It will just be pleasure in seeing an old friend.
But not yet.
And hopefully sometimes I can come here and vent.
Tiki, if you've never read The Way of the Peaceful Warrior, I highly suggest picking up a copy. He talks all about feeling things fully and then letting them go (let it flow and let it go :D). It's a great book, with tons of useful information, but it is told in the form of a story, and a really interesting story. It's not very long either. You can read it in a day or two. Dan Millman is the author. It's one of my favorite books, and it's great to refer back to it now and then.
Dana, I'm glad I got the gist of it. :)
Thanks, I may check it out. :)
This damn rain is making my life miserable especially at work. Hanging around inside the house all day or sitting around in the shop makes for a long, long day.
Positive: It makes the scotch taste better come 1700 hrs.
We are supposed to get a one day break from it on Saturday. Sure hope we have time to finish our horseshoe tourney.
twisting my ankle monday night, shoes had no soul,:yelsick:
now i have to explain it to my boss why i couldnt come in yeserday
better still, im out of sick hours and im still limping
The guy who runs the cafe near my office is my buddy; we always pick on each other as I get coffee.
He told me yesterday that leaving on Monday his artificial leg broke into two. I said "what'd you do?" He said he hopped to his car (not a short distance,) went to his "guy" and got it fixed.
He told his boss the next day "if anyone else had broken their leg in half they wouldn't be here...see what a good hire I was?"
He's a cool guy. :)
My washer is no longer spinning with gusto.
maybe a little rumba?
I am in a rut. Mentally, emotionally, physically, socially - you name it. I went from a high stress job to a similar job for less pay but ZERO stress, almost to the point of boredom. I have been dating the same guy for two years, and I know it's going nowhere - he wants to live together, and have me help raise his kids and share expenses and responsibilities, but I have no desire - I am recently divorced (about a year before I met him - is three years recent? I dunno) have my own beautiful daughter to raise, my own place that I love - why do I need all of that extra weight? I really do love the guy for who he is, and I enjoy spending time with him, but I really don't want to be his "partner." And he is not at my mental or social level (wow that sounsd conceited) so occasionally I find myself explaining jokes or language or points of reference, which is a big turn off. But I don't know how to break it off. I'm also supposed to be re-studying for my Series Seven which upon passing will increase my pay and status, but I already failed i tonce, and I don't deal well with failure, so I have totally postponed putting myself through the torture of mentally preparing for it again.
Thank you for letting me vent. You may now return to your regularly scheduled programming.
I took that f*$#ing thing twice - :headshake: Beat me both times by 1 damn question. I think it was a message from above for me to get out of that business... so I did. Long time ago.
After 15 years I am deathly afraid of a career change that will afford me the life I live. Unless it was into "escorting" or "exotic performance" but unfortunately my modesty is still somewhat in tact.
I've found that most people failing the 7 do so not because they don't know the answers but because the test has been built up in to such an incredible bogeyman in their mind.
You've spent time in the industry so you probably know most of the stuff already. Options generally kick people in the teeth because it is really complex and makes up more than 20% of the score. QotR, what study materials are you using?
FWIW - That was over 20 years ago for me LO123. I breezed through every other exam. That one I missed by one question both times.
I figured classic. So what did they test you on back then? I didn't even know there were equities that long ago. ;) I was really responding to QotR more.
I want to go back to school but I'm not totally sure how I'm gonna swing it financially.
Actually, by "not totally sure" I really mean "I don't have the slightest idea".
Is there anyone you can talk to for advice on funding options and so on Tiki?
Chat is empty, very upsetting to me.
Queen, drop him, you're gonna end up hurting him the longer you take to do so. You know the relationship is a dead end, he doesn't. That being said, I do understand it is hard, because you don't want to be alone, and you tell yourself you're saving him hurt by staying. Not true.
Good luck on your test. Do you have mentor or friend of similar profession that could help you with your studying?
Tiki, there is a way. What type of school are you going back for? Do you have school picked out? First step is to fill out your FAFSA, second step is to talk to your financial and school counselors.
http://www.fafsa.ed.gov/maybe a little rumba?
I am in a rut. Mentally, emotionally, physically, socially - you name it. I went from a high stress job to a similar job for less pay but ZERO stress, almost to the point of boredom. I have been dating the same guy for two years, and I know it's going nowhere - he wants to live together, and have me help raise his kids and share expenses and responsibilities, but I have no desire - I am recently divorced (about a year before I met him - is three years recent? I dunno) have my own beautiful daughter to raise, my own place that I love - why do I need all of that extra weight? I really do love the guy for who he is, and I enjoy spending time with him, but I really don't want to be his "partner." And he is not at my mental or social level (wow that sounsd conceited) so occasionally I find myself explaining jokes or language or points of reference, which is a big turn off. But I don't know how to break it off. I'm also supposed to be re-studying for my Series Seven which upon passing will increase my pay and status, but I already failed i tonce, and I don't deal well with failure, so I have totally postponed putting myself through the torture of mentally preparing for it again.
Thank you for letting me vent. You may now return to your regularly scheduled programming.
Oh my god... I just re-read this and realized how much I feel the same way about the guy I just started dating. :( Only, he has no kids of his own and wants them, bad. I can't do that for him... well, not can't, but won't. And he's bright, but not bright enough. Plus, I'm still in emotional hamburger territory from my divorce, etc etc.
He knows all this but I can tell he's still hopeful, and I should just break it off now. It's only been four dates, it won't hurt him so much.
Dana, MTP, I actually was going to go down to the American Indian Center at PSU on Monday to talk to someone... as an older, returning, single parent, minority student, I am hoping that I can get funding that will help me pay my living expenses, which are considerable because I'm raising three kids and have a mortgage. Being self-employed, I can work part-time, any hours that don't conflict with my kids' schedules... but the nature of my business is that if I drop below a certain level of productivity, I'll sell a smaller percentage of what I do make, because designers need to feel confident about being able to come to me for the majority of their needs week after week. If I work full-time I can sell about 80% of what I make, but if I drop to half-time I'll only sell about 50% of what I make because I'll lose my steady big-purchase clients.
Oh lord, Tiki. You need to bring that to a close if you're sure you feel that way. Especially if he wants something you can't/won't give him.
Yeah. I just wanted to date for fun/getting out/confidence boosting/returning to the world of normalcy, and he seemed to be on the same wavelength at first, but the subtext I'm picking up from him (and maybe I'm doing a lot of assuming, here) is that he wants to settle down, he wants kids, and he really likes me A LOT more than I like him.
But let me put it like this: he's hot, but he spits in the street. I can't deal.
The other guy I was dating, the first one I tried on after the whole divorce/breakup mess, ended up just being a really great friend... maybe I should just hit him up to take me out and tell me I'm pretty a couple times a week, and put a hold on actual dating for another six months or so. :lol:
I want to go back to school but I'm not totally sure how I'm gonna swing it financially.
Hmmm, I think one of the Dwellars is a financial aid professional. ;)
PM me if you ever have questions. All conversation is held in strictest confidence.
You CAN get financing for school, one way or another. There may be some hoops but it can be done.
I've found that most people failing the 7 do so not because they don't know the answers but because the test has been built up in to such an incredible bogeyman in their mind.
You've spent time in the industry so you probably know most of the stuff already. Options generally kick people in the teeth because it is really complex and makes up more than 20% of the score. QotR, what study materials are you using?
I took a week long course with Bobby Day right before I got laid off from my old firm (15 yrs working for the same FA, and the effing FIRM decided I needed to go - he was just as blindsided as I was) - Bobby was with Dearborn and STC but he and some buds formed their own new set of guides, approved by FINRA - I took the test in Feb with my new firm (only took me three weeks to find work - in this economy? I am sooo blessed) and got a 68. I'd been studying for this damn thing since November really strong, and got a 68. I know the bonds and options - it's memorizing the rules and regs that I have a problem with. Give me logic over memorization any day. I am so disenchanted, I called and put it off for a month because my brain needs a break. And my daughter needs some attention.
And Tiki, MTP, etc - I know you are right. He knows I don't want the same things he does, but I think he's convinced himself he can change my mind, so I keep telling him it's not going to happen, and he keeps trying to convince me otherwise. It's a no-win situation for both of us, no matter how much we adore each other.
15 yrs working for the same FA, and the effing FIRM decided I needed to go - he was just as blindsided as I was
What the hell??? did his production fall to the point the firm was having to subsidize your pay? even my old school stick in the mud firm wouldn't have done that.
Hmmm, I think one of the Dwellars is a financial aid professional. ;)
PM me if you ever have questions. All conversation is held in strictest confidence.
You CAN get financing for school, one way or another. There may be some hoops but it can be done.
Cool... thanks!
What the hell??? did his production fall to the point the firm was having to subsidize your pay? even my old school stick in the mud firm wouldn't have done that.
I worked for one of the big firms - they laid off 1600 people in one day (six from our branch alone). The firm didn't pay me jack, and I worked for three of the top ten producers in that office (My fifteen year guy wasd number two in that branch.) I don't think they did their math very well, because they are hurting for assistants now. I don't think they realized how much work I actually did, because I'm anal retentive and OCD, so my desk was always clean no matter how busy I was.
After 15 years I am deathly afraid of a career change that will afford me the life I live. Unless it was into "escorting" or "exotic performance" but unfortunately my modesty is still somewhat in tact.
I just saw something on TV the other night about how so many women from Wall Street are now working as exotic dancers!
I just saw something on TV the other night about how so many women from Wall Street are now working as exotic dancers!
New meaning for "buy low sell high."
And hopefully sometimes I can come here and vent.
This reply is to your stated hope but more of a general comment to everyone.
Of course you can come here and vent, we're open 24/7 for your convenience. :D
However if people respond to your vent, 99.9% of the time it's because they are trying to be helpful. So if their comment seems off target understand they are working with what you gave them, and can't know what you didn't. Try not to assume advice that you don't feel is right for you wasn't offered with sincere concern.
This reply is to your stated hope but more of a general comment to everyone.
Of course you can come here and vent, we're open 24/7 for your convenience. :D
However if people respond to your vent, 99.9% of the time it's because they are trying to be helpful. So if their comment seems off target understand they are working with what you gave them, and can't know what you didn't. Try not to assume advice that you don't feel is right for you wasn't offered with sincere concern.
That's cool, but if it's trite, cliched, glib, stupid, or otherwise irritating I'm gonna say so. :)
I have high expectations of y'all.
99.9% of the time it's because they are trying to be helpful
or be smart asses to make you Laugh ,
That's cool, but if it's trite, cliched, glib, stupid, or otherwise irritating I'm gonna say so. :)
I have high expectations of y'all.
Cool, just remember, "trite, cliched, glib, stupid, or otherwise irritating", is a matter of perspective. ;)
:lol: yes, I grade on a curve!
And yes, good intentions cleanse a multitude of sins. :)
Missing him badly today. Mourning for what-might-have-been. I know he's doing the right thing for him right now, but worried about the toll it will take in time. And it's hard, seeing him the other night, feeling that connection, feeling his leaning toward me... the physical connection that's still there, the fondness and affection still there, and the very sweet goodbye kiss. And, later, finding my keys in the bottom of the bag he handed me, a symbol of severance.
earache. Going to the doc in an hour or so.
Have not done an essay in over 8 years, and I have got to hand in my first of many more in 30 mins- still have 2000 words to go. (obviouslly, this is not going to be handed in)
I am pissed at myself for letting myself down and not preparing my time better. I had to move, accomodate people, stress over 100 other things and just left this all way too late and it turned out to be harder than i remember.
Farrk.
Why was procrastination ever even invented?! seriously! WHEN will i ever understand that if i just DO IT - it will be ok and all happen. instead i have to wank about and waste my precious precious time and then leave everything to the last minuite.
FARRK.
I dont wanna be the girl in class that is always callign the lecturer in tears at 30 mins to the due date and time.
FARRRK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I remember bringing to class muffins rather than a paper due that day that was 30% of our grade. :p A classmate said, "I see where your priorities are." Hehe.....Wouldn't have finished the paper whether I baked the muffins are not, and it was my day to bring snacks. :p
So, sparky, what are you doing here, hmmmMMM????
Back to work!!! :whip:
Hadn't heard from my best friend in Cali since last week - we usually keep in touch a bit better- she wasn't returning my calls. Was worried so I e-mailed her - turns out she picked up her heroine addict son from jail (did his year for burglary) on Saturday, just to get home to find out her dad was in the ER - had a stroke. They found two brain tumors. Got him stabilized, sent him home. Last night he had another stroke - turns out one of the brain tumors burst. Never heard of that before.
The thing is, he's more than just my best friend's dad - he's been a dad to me ever since my dad commited suicide. My adughter calls him grandpa. And he's in Cali, I'm in Colorado - don't know what to do from here other than hope and pray and send the family my love. I feel helpless and hopeless and want to cry. (And of course his dog got sick the same day he did - they almost put the dog down but he told them to wait until he got out of the hospital - so now the dog is home on serious meds to control her seizures.)
Oh, queen -- I'm so sorry. I hope he stabilizes. I know it's hard being so far away...
Thanks Pie. Just got a text from my BF - they're moving him to a better hospital right now.
Update: something to do with the arteries, they're going to do surgery - details are foggy.
I'm thinking of you and your loved ones, QotR. It's hard to be so far away, I'm sure. :(
Yeah that's the worst part - There's not a damn thing I can do from here. I want to give my family hugs, and want them to hug me.
That must be so hard for you Qof t R :comfort:
Kinda weird - they've been friends of mine and my exes forever - more family than friends. My ex and I are both out here (daughter too) so we've agreed if we go back for funeral, etc. we all three go together.
Oh Queenie, that's horrible. I'm so sorry you're going through this. I'll be thinking positive thoughts, and as usual Pilau will also be contributing some positive energy. Remember you can come here and offload whenever you need it. *hugs*
@ Sunsparkz. I am that girl :P
Thank you all so much. You guys are the best electronic huggers.
That's terrible, Queen... I hope he's OK.
I haz prayers.
:grouphug:
Learning I am Mortal ...and more so that i thought. I got my back x-rayed because of the trapped nerve that had me in the ER a couple of weeks ago (still only partial sensation in one foot, got traction at the physio today), and they called and said there is marked degeneration of my spine and I have to have an MRI on Saturday. :(
Athritis was mentioned. I'm 38 FFS :(
Oh monnie, thats awful. I hope its not as bad as it sounds. Sending love rays your way!
Learning I am Mortal ...and more so that i thought. I got my back x-rayed because of the trapped nerve that had me in the ER a couple of weeks ago (still only partial sensation in one foot, got traction at the physio today), and they called and said there is marked degeneration of my spine and I have to have an MRI on Saturday.
That sux. On the bright side, however, they can do things for back issues now that were unthinkable even ten years ago. Either way, surgery is a bummer but you might come out better on the other side.
Monster...disc degeneration is inevitable and seeing it at 38 isn't unusual. You might want to look into exercises for your back...mostly stretching and a little weight training too. Posture is also very important, as well as diet...make sure to not dehydrate too often.
That sucks Monnie. Pico's right though, disc degeneration really isn't unusual for 38. Especially, actually in active sporty types (or so I'm led to believe, i may be wrong).
thanks y'all and yebbut apparently this is more than the "expected" ah well, I'm above average in everything else, so why not this too? :lol:
[COLOR="LemonChiffon"]I'm a little scared about the MRI though, I'm claustrophobic and sedative-phobic.[/COLOR]
Ah mo-mo...you're just too much awesome for your body to handle.
Damn Queen, I'm so sorry to hear about your extended family's troubles. I'll send some good energy their way, and yours as well. Here's a big hug... {{{{{{{Queenie}}}}}}}
monster, so sorry about your back. I have serious back problems, have had them for about the past 7 years or so, so I can totally relate. Sometimes the only thing that helps me (and it does help, a LOT), is taking pain pills, which I abhor doing, but living in pain is worse. I hope they find something is that is easliy treatable and get you fixed up fast.
Eeek Monster, I hope it's not too bad!
I'm a little scared about the MRI though, I'm claustrophobic and sedative-phobic.
Don't worry, the sedatives will take care of that. ;)
Just called them. no sedatives for me, should be only about 30 mins, I can be a big girl and handle that :) (It's mostly crowds I don't like -small spaces at least don't move or get smaller. usually)
Did they tell you if the tube is open on the other end? That always helps me. I have to go once a year... it's actually kind of relaxing, in a weird way, once you get over the unfamiliarity. It's a little unnerving when they talk to you through the headphones to make sure you're comfortable, though!
no they didn't say. I'll be fine.
They have open MRIs for people who are claustrophobic. If it's a problem maybe you could ask for one of those. personally, MRIs don't bother me, except that they are so damn LOUD.
Learning I am Mortal ...and more so that i thought. I got my back x-rayed because of the trapped nerve that had me in the ER a couple of weeks ago (still only partial sensation in one foot, got traction at the physio today), and they called and said there is marked degeneration of my spine and I have to have an MRI on Saturday. :(
Athritis was mentioned. I'm 38 FFS :(
Wow. I hope it all turns out all right. Those kind of back problems can lead down a series of drastic decision making.
Those kind of back problems can lead down a series of drastic decision making.
Gee, thanks, I feel so reassured :lol:
I survived the MRI you'll be pleased to hear. If it'd've gone on any longer I'd've probably gone to sleep -it was loud, but with all the earplugs if was almost lulling like the washing machine on spin or the vacuum cleaner. and the "enclosed space" didn't bother me at all -there was at least 6 inches between my face and the top of the tube.
Glad to hear it went well. I hate the closed MRI. Thankfully the last two I had were in an open MRI.
Glad to hear you survived it. Have you gotten any results yet?
Wow Mon. Hope you're doing okay. We have the technology - we can rebuild.....
Update, FYI Pops got moved from the little local hospital to the big one that specilizes in brain stuff - they put him on blood thinners, the blockage disappeared, no surgery, he's going home toady or tomorrow. He'll need intensive therapy to get past the effects of the stroke, but he ain't gonna die like the first hospital was telling us. WHEW! I say it's all of the Cellar vibes - thanks guys.
I'm not a big baseball fan, but Harry Kalas, voice of the World Champion Phillies just passed away. :(
I can't get the dog in the house.
I saw 5 cars ignore an ambulance trying to get onto the street to the hospital as they sped by. The siren was blaring and the lights were flashing and the EMT was shaking his fist...okay, that last one was what I imagine he might have been doing, but it was still irresponsible of those people not to stop.
this guy.
he keeps BUGGING me and I'm going to have to be RUDE to get rid of him.
eeeerrrrrrrrgh.
why is it always the absolute NON-chemically attractive men who desire my company?
If I liked him just a smidge, he'd run for the hills. The fact that he rubs me the wrong way in every way makes him lurrrrrrve me. yuk.
OK, sorry, I'll back off. Didn't mean to offend.
OK, sorry, I'll back off. Didn't mean to offend.
good one, SD, but you were invited back to the House of Pleasure a looooong time ago.
this guy is...well, to put it mildly, just the sort I would attract: IOW not any of YOU guys - except for the few here who truly are...you KNOW who you are)
I'm sure he's just trying to "reach out" to another suffering alcoholic; a woman he sees as isolating herself and hugging her resentments, hell bent for the asylum or easeful death. I suppose I should be grateful anyone has taken the interest, the time, the
sheer fucking effort to notice my exsistence. It's always gotta be this guy, though, doesn't it?
Chuh.
I thought it was "the sky".......
grumblegrumble *stalks off to stomp and rant under a bridge* grumblegrumble
grumblegrumble *stalks off to stomp and rant under a bridge* grumblegrumble
There goes another hobo.
There goes another hobo.
female troll. many here would not disagree with this. let 'em rip, people. I'm in a mood. and NO, it's not my "period" but thanks for thinking that, you potato heads.
good one, SD, but you were invited back to the House of Pleasure a looooong time ago.
this guy is...well, to put it mildly, just the sort I would attract: IOW not any of YOU guys - except for the few here who truly are...you KNOW who you are)
I'm sure he's just trying to "reach out" to another suffering alcoholic; a woman he sees as isolating herself and hugging her resentments, hell bent for the asylum or easeful death. I suppose I should be grateful anyone has taken the interest, the time, the sheer fucking effort to notice my exsistence. It's always gotta be this guy, though, doesn't it?
Chuh.
Shit, she meant me, but I think I'm so charming!
Spineless, skittish, jellyfish people.
Seriously, how do they live with themselves?
Spineless, skittish, jellyfish people.
Seriously, how do they live with themselves?
For the most part they need to float in a fluid of some sort.
The fluid of lies and the juices of the phonies.
:lol:
Did you just define alcohol?
mudluscious Just Spring?
more like shit-luscious out today. Just back from walk with the Jack Russel and it's shite out. soupy, misty, muddy, raw umber day. I prefer the Crystal Blue days but I suppose you can't admire those if you can't compare them to their opposite.
Jealous of Labrat's "Sunny and Splendid!" forecast.
gah! Nutty weather.
Perfect weather for the grass seed I put down on a few bare splotches. Nice and moist.
True Conversation:
Me: "Mom, I'm going to go see a podiatrist friday; my feet really hurt. I think I have plantar fasciitis."
Mom: "Lose ten pounds."
Sounds like my mom! I missed passing my test by two friggin questions; instead of "Oh, you're so close!" or some such support, I got "Well I'll bet you're disapointed in yourself."
"Lose ten pounds," and "I'll bet you;re disappointed in yourself,"
one more and we'll have the Mother Shame Trifecta.
eta: I'll PM Sheldon. He'll know the other one.
Not sure what to add here. I was the baby and the only boy. I could do no wrong in my mother's eyes. Got away with a LOT!
but aren't you a ghey? and Jewish? Come on - you gotta have SOMETHING for us.
Nope. Spoiled rotten and I knew it.
Now my SISTERS...They could criticize.
I believe it's "I'm not surprised, the way you act" as a response to any tale of woe or injustice.
Today I am upset at the prospect of having no support when I leave Cornerstone (the day care centre I am at). I suppose I'll find out what, if anything, is available at my Care Plan Assessment meeting on Friday. But Friday is also the day I am discharged. I'm worrying myself into a state at the idea I'll go from a daily supportive environment from 10.00-15.00 to a fortnightly visit from a busy psychiatric nurse, who I'll get at best for an hour - not long enough to even update her on my mood.
I'll also miss having a dedicated care worker looking out for me - contacting my GP practice, telling them to prescribe things (if I don't know they exist, how can I ask for them?). Getting my interim meetings re alcohol. Making sure I get to see the psychiatrist on site. And all the rest.
I'm going to have another go at volunteering. Probably gardening this time. In fact the building behind Cornerstone is asking for gardening volunteers so at least I'll be on the same premises.
And of course Oasis (nee Addiction Counselling Trust) have two groups I can attend, so that fills up some time. I see my case worker there tomorrow at 09.00, so I can discuss my fears with her. And get acupuncture, and have more beads put in - my ear I mean, temporary things for stress.
Sigh. It's just a long road until I get to psychotherapy. Best estimate three months. But I can't really move on until I start dealing with the underlying issues I have, or I will be back worse than where I started before I know it. As it was I spent three hours crying this evening after I came home. The realisation of what was coming (following a group called "Preparing for Discharge"), a silly thing where my brownies got overcooked in baking, and the an accusation from my Dad, via my Mum, that I had "stolen" her debit card and used it behind her back. Untrue of course, but it brought it all flooding out.
Still a bit weepy now.
Time for a cup of tea perhaps.
Actually my breasts are really sore and heavy. Perhaps I'm prone to hormonal shifts after all.
love you, Sundae. :warmth: :cuppa: :hugs:
Oh hon *hugs* that's horrid. Best thing about days like that is they expire at midnight.
You're going to do just fine Cherry, really you are. The every day support is great and I know it's been a massive help for you, but you won't crash and burn the moment it's not there. Really you won't. That part of you that is taking you down these good roads won't let that happen. Place your trust there. You are strong. Even though you may not feel it. You are.
You've engaged with the fear for a while, now you need to set that to one side. It can't help you. Don't ignore it; recognise it but postpone it. Something to reassess after your first week.
*another hug*
Pilau offered to hug you too, but I told him he's far too smelly.
Lots of hugs from here too. But I'll be careful around your sore breasts. :D
Dammit.
I just got word from my old job that a friend of mine has less than 24 hours to live.
Smitty worked in maintenance, and was one of my very favorite people. He was an admitted wild child back in his day, and had only settled down a little. We made each other laugh every time we ran into each other, and I could beeatch about my job knowing he would beeatch back and it would never leave the confines of our conversation.
I guess he has Hepatitis C, something I did not know. I spoke with my ex boss just now and she said she did know and was surprised it wasn't common knowledge.
He is a good man, a happy soul. So many days I threatened to switch jobs with him, when I would see him out on the riding mower on a beautiful sunny day, smoking his cigarettes and enjoying the world.
I'll miss you Smitty. :(
:sad:
sorry Shawnee. that sucks.
A ferociously aggressive form of genetically-based ovarian cancer killed my beloved SIL less than 2 yrs ago. Now my SIL's sister has had a recurrence of cancer w/biopsy scheduled (but it looks like it's the same cancer), and her niece has an estimated 3 months left. My niece had prophylactic surgery already but I know she has worries, too. Damn damn damn damn. :(
They need to wipe out ovarian cancer...the sneakiest f*cking cancer for women.
I'm so sorry, sweetwater.
Oh hon *hugs* that's horrid. Best thing about days like that is they expire at midnight.
You're going to do just fine Cherry, really you are. The every day support is great and I know it's been a massive help for you, but you won't crash and burn the moment it's not there. Really you won't. That part of you that is taking you down these good roads won't let that happen. Place your trust there. You are strong. Even though you may not feel it. You are.
You've engaged with the fear for a while, now you need to set that to one side. It can't help you. Don't ignore it; recognise it but postpone it. Something to reassess after your first week.
*another hug*
Pilau offered to hug you too, but I told him he's far too smelly.
All worth repeating, SG, even including the smelly hug from the dog!
:grouphug:
Shawnee and Sweetee - I'm really sorry to hear your news. Wishing you, too, strength.
It's sad to hear of all this at the same time. Well wishes to all.
My glasses broke this morning.
My son needs at least one baby tooth extracted because they're not coming out on their own.
The ex-I'm-still-in-love-with said he wants to be friends, but then is completely ignoring me, so that it seems like an entirely one-sided effort at friendship, which is an even weirder, more subtle form of rejection and is making me feel terrible and pathetic for even trying.
First off, there must've been something in the air today because my students were all being particularly crazy. Teaching today was a long, arduous task, and when the school day was over I had to take off like a bat of hell to get to the university campus.
I had a portfolio due today as one of my final requirements before graduation. It's a full four inch binder and represents about three years worth of school work, not to mention several hours of lost sleep this past week putting finishing touches on it. I turned it in, and the woman behind the desk said "Yep, looks good!" and pushed it back across the desk to me. I'm grateful I got the sign off, but it's so frustrating to have spent so much time on it and for her not to fully look over it.
As I was leaving campus, I got rear-ended. Greeeat. My very first car accident. Thankfully, I am okay, and the car is not totalled, but the trunk is completely fucked and will probably need replacing. I have stuff I need to grade stuck in there that I can't get to, so it looks like I'm getting the night off.
The guy wants to try and pay cash for the damage, and I'm not sure what to do. He was driving a company truck and is scared he'll lose his job if they find out he had an accident. I think it's going to be a little more than he realizes to get it fixed. I feel bad for him, but I'm thinking it'd be best to let insurance handle it. Suggestions/advice on how to handle it are welcome.
Sounds like a sucky day, I'm sorry. :(
My ex was rear-ended (by Joaquin Nin-Culmell, of all people) and did the cash thing... it worked out well. He took the car to get an estimate, took the estimate to dude, and dude just wrote a check... no hassles.
You're insurance company may have SERIOUS issues with you not reporting an accident. If the trunk is as messed up as you say, I would call them IMMEDIATELY
I would lean toward the insurance company. It sounds like major repairs--not just patching up a couple dents or something like that--and you have no idea how much they will cost, or how much trouble you'll have shaking the guy down for the money.
You're insurance company may have SERIOUS issues with you not reporting an accident. If the trunk is as messed up as you say, I would call them IMMEDIATELY
That depends a lot on whether it's a newer or older car, and whether it has comprehensive coverage or liability-only. At least in Oregon, it does. I imagine other states may vary a lot.
I'd report it to the police immediately, get an estimate and tell the guy how much it is. If he balks, then tell your insurance company, but don't wait more than a few days to tell them.
My best friend had a similar experience. Although the guy involved couldnt afford the whole repair bill. He ended up with the guy paying about two thirds the cost of repair. Though it cost my friend a little, it was no where near as much of a loss when compared to losing his no claims bonus.
Yeah, I called the cops immediately. The College of Education is adamant about reporting anything remotely law related to them, and I wasn't about to chance it three weeks before graduation. Turns out our local police doesn't invesitage crashes anymore unless there was a serious injury. They don't even file a report, and neither of us got ticketed. The officer took my insurance info and the other guy's info and wrote it on a form so that we'd have an official swap, and then reminded us that we better not tell the insurance co. we filed a report because there was none. My husband also called the insurance company right away, and they essentially said "Okay, call us back later."
I have my left brake light out, and the trunk lid buckled in so that it won't open. Trunk lid looks pretty messed up and we're thinking it'll end up being replaced. Looks like there was minor damage to the back part of the main frame (I think that's what my husband called it... I'm not too good with cars) and so that will have to be pulled out. Oh, and the bumper is kinda half-off, half-on, and we don't know what the deal with that will be.
The guy is very insistent that he's willing to pay cash, so for now our plan is that my husband will take the car in to get an estimate today, call the guy up, and if he the guy balks we'll call the insurance company.
Sigh.
Don't forget about any medical reprecussion Choc. You might not start feeling any pain for a few days, or even longer, but you should get checked out yourself. I would go the insurance route, especially if the other guy has insurance. Even if he doesn't and you're willing to let him pay cash, I wouldn't settle on an amount until you're sure you didn't get injured.
The last time I was rear-ended, I did call my insurance and they laughed at me--"Wait, he rear-ended you, right? Call his insurance." Choco's insurance shouldn't be involved at all unless it turns out the guy is uninsured.
Well I'm done at Cornerstone now.
I had a good cry after getting my Care Assessment Plan.
It is indeed one visit every fortnight.
I'm lucky - I have two in a row, but that's because my CPN goes on holiday the week after that. She says we'll discuss whether I see a colleague of hers or whether I can manage for two weeks without an appointment, given that I am having two in two weeks.
There were some good things.
They can work with me on some things like getting accommodation, making sure I get the right benefits, getting funding from a local fund in order to take some classes (creative writing for example).
Am done with the crying. Trying to set out a timetable so I have plenty to do.
I do expect to feel a little lost at 10.00 on Monday though...
Bingo, classicman -- the estimate today was $3,600 + whatever damage is on the inside once they finally pop my trunk open. Husband called the guy who hit me, and the guy had a response to the effect of "please go get another estimate, I have a buddy that can do the body work, I found this trunk lid on eBay..." so hubby hung up with him and immediately opened a claim with our insurance company.
Our company will be the one we deal with, and they will be the ones to hound the other guy's insurance company. Looks like I'm stranded for the next week or so until we get it fixed. :(
Excellent - Thats what you pay them for. Let them earn it.
No rental coverage???? That should be covered by his insurance.
Call them directly, immediately!
Classicman is dead on, I think: Busted trunk lid, two busted real quarter panels, both tail lights, bumper and bumper cover, lower trunk and probably the trunk floor. I'm guessing this hits $4500-$4900 total after they get to see inside. There is no way the guy will be able to pay for this or handle it correctly.
It gets kind of strange. He had been texting me and has been calling rather frantically to try to figure out some way to pay out of pocket. This morning the guy emailed me with a trunk lid and bumper he found on eBay for cheap and says he knows "a buddy" that can do the repair work. When I told him the estimate I got, he pleaded with me to get a second one because he was sure there was no way it could possible cost so much. "Don't do anything until you call me. I will find the money, somehow."
Uh...no. I feel really awful for the guy and hate to be the one that makes the decision, but there's no way he can make this work. We don't even know the full extent of the damage until they actually start working on the car, and if they discover the gas tank has been knocked off a bracket and dented or that the frame is torqued, we're screwed if he doesn't have the cash. Really, we can't have one of his old high school buddies try to tack on a new bumper he scrounged online and beat on the frame with a claw hammer so that he can not get in trouble with his job.
I guess we have to keep an eye on this headache Choco has developed today as well, which we're fairly certain is just stress related. If not, that's absolutely nothing for an out of pocket expense.
Oh, yeah, we do have rental coverage as well. Adjuster is dropping by to take a look on Monday.
The last time I was rear-ended, I did call my insurance and they laughed at me--"Wait, he rear-ended you, right? Call his insurance." Choco's insurance shouldn't be involved at all unless it turns out the guy is uninsured.
Doesn't seem to work that way in Florida. Hooray for no fault. :rolleyes:
Bingo, classicman -- the estimate today was $3,600 + whatever damage is on the inside once they finally pop my trunk open. Husband called the guy who hit me, and the guy had a response to the effect of "please go get another estimate, I have a buddy that can do the body work, I found this trunk lid on eBay..." so hubby hung up with him and immediately opened a claim with our insurance company.
Our company will be the one we deal with, and they will be the ones to hound the other guy's insurance company. Looks like I'm stranded for the next week or so until we get it fixed. :(
Hahaha NOOOO FREAKING WAY
If he wants to pay out of pocket, he can pay for what you need done by a professional, not a bunch of weird parts slapped on by his "buddy". That's ridiculous!
Well I'm done at Cornerstone now.
I had a good cry after getting my Care Assessment Plan.
It is indeed one visit every fortnight.
I imagine it'll be a tough time as you become accustomed to the change. You're in my thoughts, SG. Hang in there!
The last time I was rear-ended, I did call my insurance and they laughed at me--"Wait, he rear-ended you, right? Call his insurance." Choco's insurance shouldn't be involved at all unless it turns out the guy is uninsured.
Didn't we already have
a thread about getting rear-ended?
[size=1]If I didn't, somebody else would.[/size]
Don't forget about any medical reprecussion Choc. You might not start feeling any pain for a few days, or even longer, but you should get checked out yourself. I would go the insurance route, especially if the other guy has insurance. Even if he doesn't and you're willing to let him pay cash, I wouldn't settle on an amount until you're sure you didn't get injured.
I echo that. I was injured in an accident, and I STILL have problems with my neck and back because of it. Those kinds of things do not always show up right away, and they are expensive to treat. From the damage you describe, it sounds like he hit you pretty hard.
...I guess we have to keep an eye on this headache Choco has developed today as well, which we're fairly certain is just stress related. If not, that's absolutely nothing for an out of pocket expense.
Oh, yeah, we do have rental coverage as well. Adjuster is dropping by to take a look on Monday.
Not to scare you or anything, but Natasha Richardson died recently after developing a headache after a skiing accident where she hit her head. Choco should go get checked out asap. You really do not want to screw with injuries like that. It could be nothing, or it could be something, and the sooner she is treated the better.
my son treats me like shit.
he really does. it makes me a stew of sadness and angery...Angry, sad stew. and I love my son, but; wow. He can really wipe his shoes on me like I'm some doormat. Brings up a lot of feelings....
thanks. I guess it's typical 17 year-old stuff; but it's ALSO the way I've let him treat me all these guilty years...
my fault, of course.
Bri, my stepson does the same exact thing to his father. I hate to see it, but am powerless to change it. Gary lets him walk all over him too.
man.
phone call from the son who is with a friend at another friend's house. Time: 11.00.
"Mom, I hit my head pretty bad on some monkey bars (playing nighttime tag) and I've got a big gash in my head..."
Me, just waking up..."uh.....ok....I'll come get you."
I get the kid. I am obliged to take kid to his father's house so the MAN can decide what course of action to take (remember, I am the unreliabe and crazy AND newly recovering from god-only-knows-what THIS time ex-wife). I have JUST been woken out of a sound sleep. Father decides I am drunk or high and tells me to leave the boy and the friend with him, he'll take kid to ED and I should just run along home.
I feel two things: mad because he thinks i'm high when really I'm just sleep-sodden, and like, well, I deserve this treatment as I haven't been the driven snow all my life, now, have I?
*hugs* Bri. Just gotta stand up to it, as hard as that might be, and remember it is not for forever. It is typical teenage stuff. *more hugs*
SG- we're here for you, and believe in you!
my son treats me like shit.
he really does. it makes me a stew of sadness and angery...Angry, sad stew. and I love my son, but; wow. He can really wipe his shoes on me like I'm some doormat. Brings up a lot of feelings....
Bri, my stepson does the same exact thing to his father. I hate to see it, but am powerless to change it. Gary lets him walk all over him too.
Leaving aside the marginally useful subject of blame for the moment....
Let me first say, I'm so sorry to hear this. It is unpleasant, having experienced it firsthand myself.
But I want to ask you this: When will it be better time for him to learn the proper way to interact? When will the habits become less ingrained? When will the accumulated hurt be less? Decide when that time is and ACT at that time.
I don't know your sons. I don't know *how* to communicate the importance of respect to them. But you and I both know it is important, even if he doesn't know it or won't acknowledge it. And seventeen is probably old enough to possess the maturity to understand. So he can learn. He needs to know right and act right. And it will be a hard, and likely long battle.
Think of it as a gift to them. Be strong, show them the way. You can do it, and they need you to show them.
man.
phone call from the son who is with a friend at another friend's house. Time: 11.00.
"Mom, I hit my head pretty bad on some monkey bars (playing nighttime tag) and I've got a big gash in my head..."
Me, just waking up..."uh.....ok....I'll come get you."
I get the kid. I am obliged to take kid to his father's house so the MAN can decide what course of action to take (remember, I am the unreliabe and crazy AND newly recovering from god-only-knows-what THIS time ex-wife). I have JUST been woken out of a sound sleep. Father decides I am drunk or high and tells me to leave the boy and the friend with him, he'll take kid to ED and I should just run along home.
I feel two things: mad because he thinks i'm high when really I'm just sleep-sodden, and like, well, I deserve this treatment as I haven't been the driven snow all my life, now, have I?
Why didn't/couldn't you take him straight to the ER?
Who here has behaved in a way that makes them ineligible for basic human respect?!
No one.
If your child behaved badly would you lose your respect for them? Would you counsel them to not expect to be respected? To shun it? To reject it?
Do not model such behavior for them. Show them how to deserve respect. Even if it means showing them how to earn it after it has been lost.
eta:
I sound like a preachy m*therf*cker. I don't mean to be preachy or self righteous. I'm not. I just know that kids, even seventeen year old kids, need limits. Limits are crucial for a kid's well being and proper development. The world, (of which they have had limited experience) is a largely unknown place, and many of the places where they *think* they know, they're misled. From the playground talk to marketing poison, they're surrounded with misinformation. And at seventeen, they can do an impeccable job of appearing to know what the f*ck is going on. Don't be misled. They might be partly right, by talent or accident. But they don't have it all nailed. And treating their parents like shit is part of the wrongheadedness, for whatever reason. They want to know the right way. Even if they protest otherwise.
--zippin my lip.
At the moment what's upsetting me is my tummy. Blech. Chicken soup, matzoh and tea for dinner tonight.
Oh I know Big V. I established boundaries with this kid very early on in the marriage. He knows what gets him in trouble with me and he knows that I always mean business. Therefore, I really get very little lip from him...or at least for not as long. His Dad is another story. Its like a practiced dialogue with the two of them. Gary gets angry and theres tons of yelling, but the boy yells right back. THAT drives me insane. As soon as the kid raises his voice to me he is in for it...I ground him or take the keys away. Gary seems to allow it. *shrugs*
snip... I deserve this treatment as I haven't been the driven snow all my life, now, have I?
"All your life" has zero to do with the here and now. If you stop beating yourself up, you can demand others stop too. Self pity doesn't attract pity, it attracts contempt and disrespect... and read my sig line. :eyebrow:
Bri, that totally sucks. If you'll forgive me, I think your ex sounds like he deserves a cockney cock punch.
Don't let his view of you impact on your view of you. One of the delightful things about divorce is it ends your obligation to give a flying fuck what he does or doesn't respect, or understand about you. Yes, it's upsetting that anybody would think that of you. And it's a kick in the face, to be cut out of decisions about your child. You don't deserve that. He IS treating you unfairly. And he probably isn't helping your son's attitude towards you into the bargain. That's unfair and wrong imo. But what he thinks of you? The fact that he holds that view of you? Well, what the fuck you gonna do. It's his head, he's entitled to fill it with as much errant nonsense as he chooses. But you don't have to believe his nonsense. And you don't have to respect it. Cope with, deal with, the effect that view has in practical terms (as in this case with the trip to casualty), but discount it utterly in emotional terms. It's his bullshit. Not yours.
Update:
Headache went away after a drink of water and a good night's sleep. I was just under a lot of stress and had had an absolutely horrible day with the students that day. Happy to report I'm not dead.
Well, bloody hell. Thank God for that, Choco.
thanks, ya'll. You guys save me.
Monnie, I couldn't just take him to the ED as I don't have full and legal custody of him - you WILL notice that I was the one called at 11.00, I am the one who allows his friends to sleep over every bloody weekend (it seems that way), I am the one who does this and that, but T. is the LEGAL (cough/controlfreak/cough) guardian. If I had DARED to take Danny to the ED on my own, or NOT taken Danny to the ED on my own, there would've been high hell to pay. T. wants me to grovel and act all helpless and stupid and girly so he can sit back like some demi-god and do no actual work of raising the boy but make all the Big Decisions. Plus, he holds the primary insurance on Dan. (I have insurance on him, too, but it's only secondary and shitty) - he would have gone apeshit on a bill he hadn't authorized.
he's a dick. thanks for reminding me. He used to be a nice person.
thanks. I guess it's typical 17 year-old stuff; but it's ALSO the way I've let him treat me all these guilty years...
my fault, of course.
One reason I never wanted kids - I didn't want the payback for all the hell I put my parents through. :D I was a wild child.
How old is the boy? Can he make the decision?
Who here has behaved in a way that makes them ineligible for basic human respect?!
No one.
If your child behaved badly would you lose your respect for them? Would you counsel them to not expect to be respected? To shun it? To reject it?
Do not model such behavior for them. Show them how to deserve respect. Even if it means showing them how to earn it after it has been lost.
eta:
I sound like a preachy m*therf*cker. I don't mean to be preachy or self righteous. I'm not. I just know that kids, even seventeen year old kids, need limits. Limits are crucial for a kid's well being and proper development. The world, (of which they have had limited experience) is a largely unknown place, and many of the places where they *think* they know, they're misled. From the playground talk to marketing poison, they're surrounded with misinformation. And at seventeen, they can do an impeccable job of appearing to know what the f*ck is going on. Don't be misled. They might be partly right, by talent or accident. But they don't have it all nailed. And treating their parents like shit is part of the wrongheadedness, for whatever reason. They want to know the right way. Even if they protest otherwise.
--zippin my lip.
Everything you have said is true. However, the father is also an example, and it sounds to me like the way he treats Brianna is also affecting the respect margin the kid gives her. He needs to be bitchslapped. (the father, not the kid)
Update:
Headache went away after a drink of water and a good night's sleep. I was just under a lot of stress and had had an absolutely horrible day with the students that day. Happy to report I'm not dead.
Glad to hear it Chocolat. Just keep an eye out for any unusual pain in the neck and back.
How old is the boy? Can he make the decision?
Good question, Toad.
He's seventeen....I don't know if that is old enough in Ohio to have medical treatment without parental consent...used to be you had to be 18 but things might have changed.
He needs to be bitchslapped. (the father, not the kid)
Both of them need a Good Whack upside the head!!
Stay strong Bri , rember who is the adult with yer kid , with the ex , if he is primary then he needs to act like it , son calls you , you call ex to deal with it .
What an asshole, Brianna (your ex). Next time tell your son to call the asshole directly. It IS time to get tough. You're worth so much more than that.
son and I got into it Sunday night.
Me: "Danny, we need to talk. Can we talk like two mature people with a difference that needs to be worked out?"
He (suspiciously): "Yeah..."
me: "You heard me say I didn't want anyone to spend the night last night and yet you managed to have ------ spend the night, again; AND I told you ------- needed to be gone by six o'clock tonight and ------ didn't leave until 8.30 and I need my house to myself by six pm so I can get into my jammies and RELAX, this is a SMALL house and I can't FEED the neighborhood blah blah blah"
Him: "I never HEARD you say you didn't want anyone sleeping over!!!! I NEVER HEARD that! That's YOUR fault! And you're trying to make me feel like shit for cracking my head open WELL you're the nurse and I just THOUGHT I should call a NURSE after my HEAD was BLEEDING like I was going to DIE! I just won't call you anymore! I"ll just go LIVE WITH MY DAD FROM NOW ON and i'm sorry I'm not PERFECT, you act like I don't do Anything around here but I work constantly around here like your slave I really thought I was going to NEVER be able to play guitar again because I'd cracked my HEAD open but I guess you dont CARE about that...BLAH BLAH BLAH....HITLER~!"
Me: "I see we can't talk about this..."
Him: "You owe me twenty dollars!"
sigh.
sometimes he gives me a stomachache.
Sounds like the sort of conversation going on between parents and teenagers all over the world. lol
I guess that's what I've got to look forward to. :rolleyes:
I'm inclined to suggest that a good answer might be "well. okay, then go live with your Dad, if you think that would be less restrictive to your lifestyle. Obviusly, I'd rather you didn't...your my son and I love you and would prefer you to be close to me. But if you find living here too restrictive then there's no good reason for you not to live with your Dad. After all, I want you to be happy."
I am going to take a wild stab in the dark and guess that his Dad would be less tolerant and more restrictive than you?
I am going to take a wild stab in the dark and guess that his Dad would be less tolerant and more restrictive than you?
lol, quite right! His father doesn't allow anyone to sleep over and most of Danny's friends are here on my side of town anyway.
tom's like the guy in Ferris Buehler's Day Off: he's so tight you could stick a lump of charcoal up his ass and in a week, you'd have a diamond!
Danny definitely prefers my house to his dad's - so all his "threats" are empty. I have cursed him, though. I have said, "I can't WAIT for you to have your own place so I can come over and throw damp towels on the floor and leave glasses in every room!"
Hahahaha. That sounds awfully close to something my Mum shouted at me when I was 16...
One of my step daughters used that "live with my Daddy" threat on me a few times. The last time she used it , I (without a reply), started packing her things for her.
Her: "What are you doing?"
Me: "I'm sending you to your Daddy's to live. I'll miss you but I know you wouldn't use that hurtful threat on me and your mom if you didn't mean it. After all, we want you to be happy and I'm sure your Dad will let you do anything you want."
About a month later...... Phone rings.
Her: "Look, Dad... If I promise to never behave that way again would you and mom let me come back home? I don't think his new girlfriend really likes me. And I thought you were strict. He doesn't trust me near as much as you do. So whaddaya think?"
Me: "Sure, baby. I'm on my way to pick you up, so be ready. You can stay here as long as you like, or until you use the childish threats again. We'll put the custody transfer papers on hold till we see how it works out."
Never heard that threat again.
Wow Cap'n that was great. I had a similar experience. I think I'm about to have it again. Mine seems to be a little more hardheaded ...:eek:
My friday night team is playing in the league championship game friday. But apparently I won't be playing as I received a red card during my game tonight. Complete and utter bullshit.
Yeah yeah yeah, that'll teach you to bring a baseball bat to a soccer game. :p
My mother.
She's so negative.
This morning there was a phone in about Alli (Orlistat). I knew there would be, as it's released for OTC sale today in the UK. I wanted to have my say, so I phoned up the talk show we always listen to in the mornings and did so. I think I came across as calm, intelligent and put my points clearly and rationally.
What did my Mum say when I came off the phone?
In quick succession, "I'd rather you hadn't gone into the garden with that so all the neighbours could hear."
Referring to another caller who was very rude to me (following callers criticised him for it) "He didn't like you, did he!"
and, "I assume they called you back for that - it wasn't on our phone bill was it?"
Why couldn't she have said at least one nice thing?
Why wasn't she furious that the man on the radio laughed when I said I had depression and said, "Oh typical".
Why immedicately make me ashamed rather than admiring me for having the confidence to want to be heard?
And for the record - I was in the garden because the washing machine was on its final spin cycle. I said nothing about alcoholism, nothing about being in acute care or being under the community psychiatric services and nothing about the fact I have low esteem because I grew up with a negative parent who taught me how worthless I am. I merely answered a question as to whether I worked.
And yes, everyone is called back before they speak on the show, as you could be on the phone for up to 30 mins - as I was. It's mentioned every morning. I was certainly aware of it before I called anyway.
And the man who was having a dig was suggesting that Alli creates depression because lazy fat people take it thinking they will get thin, but they don't because they are lazy, so they get depressed and cost the Govt a lot of money. Something any parent of a person with depression should be horrifed to hear. Instead of telling their child that the person in question just didn't like them.
The thing is, I know she will never change. She has been like this all my life, and so the only thing I can change is my reaction to her. But right now it bloody hurts.
And I'm probably over-reacting anyway.
Sigh.
I'm sorry Cherry. *hugs* If it helps, I'm proud of you...and your Mum loves you even though she's got a shitty way of showing it. Just try and keep that in mind when she's being a cow. She's as much a victim of her past as the rest of us. She obviously just doesn't know any better, but you do, so don't let it change the way you're starting to see yourself.
You count, and you matter.
Well the most promising path to my long term goal of being a professional structural firefighter in southern California is on the back burner for now. The Orange County Fire Authority human resources website now states that the second and third recruitment cycles are on hold until further notice. I was planning on applying during the third cycle that starts in September of this year since I will have my undergraduate degree at the end of August, free and clear to move out of Ohio come January 2010 (no reason to bug out early in September and miss Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas with the family).
I was worried about this happening for awhile now given the budget crisis the state of California is facing, and it looks like my semi-worst fears have been realized. No departments around here are hiring, and I can't find any others near the coast in southern California that are hiring either (my extended family lives in Orange County and San Diego). So as of now, I have no real opportunities for a paid structural firefighting career where I want to live, nor where I currently live, after graduation in 4 months. Guess I could take this opportunity to earn my CDL and get some experience driving heavy trucks, one more thing to bring to the table once a firefighting job actually becomes available. Or get a construction job and keep getting myself in optimal shape. Something like that.
This sucks.
I'm sorry Cherry. *hugs* If it helps, I'm proud of you...and your Mum loves you even though she's got a shitty way of showing it. Just try and keep that in mind when she's being a cow. She's as much a victim of her past as the rest of us. She obviously just doesn't know any better, but you do, so don't let it change the way you're starting to see yourself.
You count, and you matter.
When she came back from taking Grandad to the opticians, she did ask if I was still listening to the radio, and I said it was now a different programme - so perhaps she doesn't pay as much attention as I do (I know each topic is only discussed for an hour, and Victoria takes over at 10.00 anyway).
And then she she said... "Well I was proud of you anyway" to which I responded very positvely, "Thanks Mum!" because I think that's the way forward - don't react when she is negative, but answer positive comments with genuine pleasure.
We'll get through it one way or another.
...I think that's the way forward - don't react when she is negative, but answer positive comments with genuine pleasure.
We'll get through it one way or another.
Wise woman. Absolutely right.
SG, I've a mother just like that - took me years and years to figure it out. Your mom might be intimidated by your success, perhaps jealous, too? I'm just speculating here, but I know MY mother has a vested interest in keeping me sick. She really does.
Well the most promising path to my long term goal of being a professional structural firefighter in southern California is on the back burner for now. The Orange County Fire Authority human resources website now states that the second and third recruitment cycles are on hold until further notice. I was planning on applying during the third cycle that starts in September of this year since I will have my undergraduate degree at the end of August, free and clear to move out of Ohio come January 2010 (no reason to bug out early in September and miss Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas with the family).
I was worried about this happening for awhile now given the budget crisis the state of California is facing, and it looks like my semi-worst fears have been realized. No departments around here are hiring, and I can't find any others near the coast in southern California that are hiring either (my extended family lives in Orange County and San Diego). So as of now, I have no real opportunities for a paid structural firefighting career where I want to live, nor where I currently live, after graduation in 4 months. Guess I could take this opportunity to earn my CDL and get some experience driving heavy trucks, one more thing to bring to the table once a firefighting job actually becomes available. Or get a construction job and keep getting myself in optimal shape. Something like that.
This sucks.
Maybe later on in the year that will change, once the stimulus money gets out.
Bullitt - Have you tried a little North? There are lotsa places slightly inland and slightly north that might be slightly less desirable, but that might need you for now - Only 1 1/2 hours from LA to SD - just thinkin'...
I had a check here for about $1,000, and now I CAN'T FIND IT! :eek:
Maybe later on in the year that will change, once the stimulus money gets out.
Yeah fingers crossed. You'd hope government supplied emergency services would get priority funding from the state so they could keep staff and equipment levels optimal, but who knows. California is broke as hell, needs something like $15 billion to get up to snuff again.
Bullitt - Have you tried a little North? There are lotsa places slightly inland and slightly north that might be slightly less desirable, but that might need you for now - Only 1 1/2 hours from LA to SD - just thinkin'...
The training facility for OCFA is in Irvine actually just SE of LA, so I was kind of shooting to live in Anaheim for a bit while doing that and then the 1 year probational position. I might do that for a little while, go somewhere inland of even more north and get a good stash of experience on my resume, and then poke around out on the coast and see if I can leverage my experience into a position.
I had a check here for about $1,000, and now I CAN'T FIND IT! :eek:
That
is upsetting!
Arizona tends to have some fires from time to time as well. On the upside firefighters can afford to buy houses here. Even better is that I'm here and between you, me, juanco rocks, and tgrr we could refocus the center of the cellar into arizona if we try hard enough.
My Grendelmouse texted me to ask for my address. :(
I have no idea what he wants to send me, but my guess is that it will hurt.
I wonder if and why your would facilitate that.
then you should give him the address of the local FBI field office. Let them follow up with him when they are confused as hell after receiving his package.
then you should give him the address of the local FBI field office. Let them follow up with him when they are confused as hell after receiving his package.
:D
Bullitt:
http://www.firefighter-jobs.com/jobs.htm:D
Bullitt:
http://www.firefighter-jobs.com/jobs.htm
Daaang, LA's starting salary is $5k more than OCFA's. Interesting, I'll have to keep an eye on this one, thanks!
Arizona tends to have some fires from time to time as well. On the upside firefighters can afford to buy houses here. Even better is that I'm here and between you, me, juanco rocks, and tgrr we could refocus the center of the cellar into arizona if we try hard enough.
My engine boss from last summer lives in Phoenix actually. Kind of a weird new-age dude, believes you can mentally teleport yourself somewhere else.. yeah. Oh man, that'd be a serious shift of the balance of power back across the continental divide. I'll grab one or two from Ohio, shawnee or Bri, drag em kicking and screaming to warm weather :D
There are three possibilities:
1. He wants to return to me something I left there (unlikely, as I know I left a weedwhacker and a saw, among other things)
2. He wants to send me a letter (god, please no)
3. He wants to send me a birthday gift (I don't know how I feel about that)
I had a check here for about $1,000, and now I CAN'T FIND IT! :eek:
here it is!
4) he wants to slap you with a law suit.
Don't give him the address.
But you already did, didn't you?
Bullitt, perhaps a few dwellars need to take camping vacations near you and be very enthusiastic with their campfire cooking.......?
4) he wants to slap you with a law suit.
[COLOR=Red][SIZE=4][COLOR=White]_________[/COLOR]SURVEY SAYS......67!
[COLOR=White]________________[/COLOR]/
[/SIZE][/COLOR]
...or 5). Wants to keep an eye on you.:hide::runaway:
Well, he could always just drive by my house, or look me up. He lives pretty close-by.
Oh... ok.
He wanted your MAILING address. My bad.
:lol:
I could get paranoid, but he doesn't have a computer anymore.
I took it away.
I had a check here for about $1,000, and now I CAN'T FIND IT! :eek:
Damn Juniper. :eek: is right! I hope you find it... soon!
There are three possibilities:
1. He wants to return to me something I left there (unlikely, as I know I left a weedwhacker and a saw, among other things)
2. He wants to send me a letter (god, please no)
3. He wants to send me a birthday gift (I don't know how I feel about that)
Well, he could always just drive by my house, or look me up. He lives pretty close-by.
So he wouldn't need your actual mailing address to drop off a weedwhacker, a letter, or a gift...if he knows where you live? I think monster's right: you're getting some kind of papers. :thepain:
There is nothing to sue me over.
Really, the only thing I can think of is that he's having something sent to me, because otherwise he could give whatever it is to my sister or one of my friends to pass on to me.
I smell "cat box" but I can't tell WHY I'm smelling it.
I certainly hope someONE hasn't been using a non-issue cat box for their own cat convenience.
That could lead to being put on report.
Candygram...
[COLOR="LemonChiffon"]....or restraining order?[/COLOR]
I smell "cat box" but I can't tell WHY I'm smelling it.
I certainly hope someONE hasn't been using a non-issue cat box for their own cat convenience.
That could lead to being put on report.
Ugh, my housemate's cat does that. Drives me nuts! :( I hope that's not what's going on.
Bullitt, perhaps a few dwellars need to take camping vacations near you and be very enthusiastic with their campfire cooking.......?
Up until about a day ago NEPA was a freakin tinderbox. We could have had half the firefighters in the country employed with a few well placed idiots. Patience Bullitt, it'll happen for you. I'd say stay in the business any way you can.
yeah, the heavy truck licence idea sounds good, Bullitt
Upsetting me today. beest just got handed another 5 days unpaid vacation he must take before July ...AND, he is not allowed to use the paid vacation allowance he has for it -he also has to take a week of that before July.
Suddenly the few bucks I earned as a swim coach are no longer a bonus but now barely a dent in the hole in the budget :(
ouch. Not good. But remember... could be worse.
I am so confused. I *swear* I had this check - actually, the unopened envelope - from yesterday's mail. I put it on the kitchen counter with the rest of the mail, planning to deal with it as I sorted through the rest of it. Now it has vanished, and honestly, I am beginning to think I was wrong about having it at all. Maybe I saw an envelope that looked similar to the one this usually comes in - same blue logo - and just thought "oh good, check's here."
It's not the end of the world. I can call up the company that sent it and ask for a re-issue. I did that today and got the automated system. It said "your payment was mailed on April 24th."
Um...isn't today the 21st? Or am I in some kind of time warp?
I am so confused. Oh well, if it doesn't come in the next week or so I'll know I was right and it disappeared. In the meantime, I'll be doing some creative accounting. :)
Sorry to hear your troubles, Monster. Money doesn't buy happiness but it can sure make a nice down payment on it.
My CPN was due for my first appointment at 09.30. At 09.50 I got a call to say she was sick. Obviously she can't help that, it's just I'd built myself up to it and am disappointed.
Oh and Mum's just pointed out she hoovered and polished and cleaned the toilet and put out a new towel! So she's inconvenienced as well. I don't think I should tell her that the place was spotless anyway :)
Oh, and I'm having a period!
What's that all about?
I don't like it. I hope this isn't a regular occurrence.
@ Sundae. That sucks, hon. *hugs* But probably explains why you were feeling so tearful the other night.
@ Tiki. That's an awful lot of power for somebody to have over your day. Don;t mean that in terms of some kind of conscious power play, just that with or without realising it, he's left you waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Just a thought; but you now have an excellent tool in your laments. You know that 'something' is about to drop on you. Keep in mind that when it eventually does, you'll probably want to catch the essence of how that makes you feel. If you have that waiting as an intention, it will be a parrallel thought when you are actually faced with whatever it is. That may make you feel a) less raw and b) more in control: you would after all be not just reacting and feeling it, but also internally analysing and trying to articulate at the same time.
Even now, with it hanging there. That in itself is worth exploring. You've created yourself a tool to deal with how he made you feel, and the loss its left you with. That same tool can be made to help deal with things as they happen. With how he makes you feel now.
You've probably already thought of this. I doubt I'm saying anything new. But I can see your laments being a powerful mental and emotional tool for present woes, as well as producing wonderful poetry and reassessing past emotions.
Thanks, Dana. Yes, I agree... as each emotion comes up and seems overwhelming I'll channel it into a lament. I was trying to start from the beginning, but they've dropped out of chronological order as I find myself focusing on, and using, whatever memory/current emotion is strongest. No doubt whatever it is he's sending will trigger something.
I'm in this place where I want to be done with them, but not because I actually am done with them, if you know what I mean... it's mostly that I am yearning for the place I'll be when I am truly done with them.
I'm in this place where I want to be done with them, but not because I actually am done with them, if you know what I mean... it's mostly that I am yearning for the place I'll be when I am truly done with them.
*nods* I know exactly what you mean, I think. I remember feeling like that. Expressing it through writing really helped that. It was like, I dunno, the me that was writing was almost like a preview of the me that I'd be when I was clear of it...that make any kind of sense at all?
Yes, it does... and also the writing is giving a purpose to my strong emotions, so I don't feel so helpless.
Far from helpless if you are effectively choosing how those emotions are going to fit into your life. You've already planned out what you want from them, from the exploration of them in poetry, from the eventual destination. I'm immensely impressed with the way you've created a structural framework into which you can place what you feel and both understand it better and mould it to your own use, creatively. The 99 laments is a genius idea, structurally.
I read this and its stuck in my mind. I hadn't thought of it this way.
"It must surely be disheartening for those who suffer oppression in countries like Venezuela, Cuba and Saudi Arabia to see the American president bowing to and backslapping their oppressors when these victims have always looked up to the United States as their champions. "
Far from helpless if you are effectively choosing how those emotions are going to fit into your life. You've already planned out what you want from them, from the exploration of them in poetry, from the eventual destination. I'm immensely impressed with the way you've created a structural framework into which you can place what you feel and both understand it better and mould it to your own use, creatively. The 99 laments is a genius idea, structurally.
Thank you!
The end . . .
Is just a little harder when brought about by friends
Jesus
Peter will deny me in just a few hours
Three times will deny me - and that's not all I see
One of you here dining, one of my twelve chosen
Will leave to betray me -
Judas
Cut out the dramatics! You know very well who -
Jesus
Why don't you go do it?
Judas
You want me to do it!
Jesus
Hurry they are waiting
Judas
If you knew why I do it . . .
Jesus
I don't care why you do it!
Judas
To think I admired you
For now I despise you
Jesus
You liar - you Judas
Judas
You wanted me to do it!
What if I just stayed here
And ruined your ambition?
Christ you deserve it!
Jesus
Hurry you fool, hurry and go,
Save me your speeches
I don't want to know - Go! Go!
One of my friends keeps talking to me in riddles. I'm never really sure wtf he means. He always asks for your input but never gives you enough insight to know wtf is really going on. It's as if he is asking a question he really doesn't want a reply to. I reckon he'll talk about it when he gets ready and quit the guessing game. Friends. I love 'em.
just pour him another glass of scotch and smile quietly.
well that or drink yours and his, THEN smile quietly.
One of my friends keeps talking to me in riddles. I'm never really sure wtf he means. He always asks for your input but never gives you enough insight to know wtf is really going on. It's as if he is asking a question he really doesn't want a reply to. I reckon he'll talk about it when he gets ready and quit the guessing game. Friends. I love 'em.
Henry Q is a friend of yours?
Well we just put the second of our three Rhodesian Ridgebacks to sleep just about an hour ago. I put his brother to sleep in Jan and now it was his turn. I asked the vet to cut him open and see if he could put his finger on why he has been deteriorating so quickly over the last few weeks. It turns out he had liver cancer so it was time. A difficult but responsible decision for any dog owner. RIP Simba. Our vet, who is also a close friend, is going to bury him next to his brother Gurkha, out on his property.
Well we just put the second of our three Rhodesian Ridgebacks to sleep just about an hour ago. I put his brother to sleep in Jan and now it was his turn. I asked the vet to cut him open and see if he could put his finger on why he has been deteriorating so quickly over the last few weeks. It turns out he had liver cancer so it was time. A difficult but responsible decision for any dog owner. RIP Simba. Our vet, who is also a close friend, is going to bury him next to his brother Gurkha, out on his property.
Oh Merc! I am so sorry. To lose two friends so close together is hard indeed. My thoughts are with you.
Sorry for your loss merc. :(
Sorry to hear the bad news Merc.
Yea, another tough day in our family. My son is crushed because he is rushing home from college to get to see him one last time before we put him down. We had to call him and tell him not to rush. We just couldn't wait any longer. It was time to end the suffering. In the last 2 or 3 days he couldn't even step up a 12 inch ledge. Thanks for all your thoughts Lime, ShawShaw, UT.
Sorry man, I know how tough that is.
I bet he's chasin bunnies in doggie wherever already.
Well we just put the second of our three Rhodesian Ridgebacks to sleep just about an hour ago. I put his brother to sleep in Jan and now it was his turn. I asked the vet to cut him open and see if he could put his finger on why he has been deteriorating so quickly over the last few weeks. It turns out he had liver cancer so it was time. A difficult but responsible decision for any dog owner. RIP Simba. Our vet, who is also a close friend, is going to bury him next to his brother Gurkha, out on his property.
:( I'm so sorry Merc. I know how much you loved those dogs. Give my sympathies to the family.
I watched an episode of the Dog Whisperer earlier and there was a Rhodesian Ridgeback. I thought of you.
Oh Merc, I'm so sorry. Terribly sad. And your poor lad, he must be so upset.
How's the remaining dog coping? This must be such a strange and confusing time for him.
Very sorry to hear your sad news, mercy.
Makes me thankful only my T1s are down.
Oh Merc, I'm so sorry. Terribly sad. And your poor lad, he must be so upset.
How's the remaining dog coping? This must be such a strange and confusing time for him.
First thanks to all. Yep they were my boys and I still do have one left.
Dana I am not sure the last guy knows the other is not coming back. He is 3 years younger and assumed the pack leader role as soon as we lost Gurkha. He has relished his new role and done a surprisingly good job. We have always had 2 or three dogs. We have already discussed getting another one if we can find the right dog.
I am truly saddened by this news. My thoughts are with you.
....will take a moment to snuggle with mine.....and be grateful.:sadpace:
Sucks, Merc. But kudos for knowing when to call time. I hate when people drag it out for their gratification.
Wow, I just read this thread. I'm really sorry about your puppy dog. It's terrible to lose a pet that you love. One of my friends recently had to put her dog down thanks to liver cancer. Apparently it's fairly common in dogs which is something I never knew before. Anyway, my thoughts are with you. I'm worried I'm going to be in the same place with my Sheba later this year depending on how she copes with winter this year.
I hope you can find a new puppy to love just as much as Simba.
Man, Mercenary, I'm sorry. :(
*hugs* Merc. So sorry for your loss. I'm glad you had the strength to do the right thing for your friend, as hard as it was.
Sorry about your loss merc.
I am sorry, Merc. :( My parents recently had to put down their Golden. It just isn't the same at their house, now.
I'm so tired. I hope things will not be like this for long. Too many heartbreaks. Last night a very good friend had a heart attack. Only 40... he seems too young. He's OK, no major damage apparently. Another friend splitting from her partner of 7 years, another, adrift because he didn't get into his Master's program.
I want everything to get better, but I don't know how to make it.
Well we just put the second of our three Rhodesian Ridgebacks to sleep just about an hour ago.
Ouch, that sucks about as big as possible.:(
Do you know what took Ghurka?
Ouch, that sucks about as big as possible.:(
Do you know what took Ghurka?
Cardiomegly and Congestive heart failure is what caused me to put him to sleep. I just guessed the other one would have had the same problem. Simba developed insulin dependent diabetes within a few weeks after Gurkha was put down, which I thought was kind of weird, but he did. Now looking back on it he most likely developed some form of obstructive common bile duct due to tumor that would not allow insulin to be secreted from his pancreas.
Fucktards who say they did not close the business date, when obviously they did or their business date would not be the next date if they had been reconciling the correct date. Oh well, they get to start over, altho they most likely have closed that date already. Thats what they get for not knowing what the fuck they're doing.
Sorry to hear about your dogs Merc, how lucky they were to have you as their owner.
Not upsetting....heart breaking.
My extended surrogate family (from when I was younger) found my beloved horse *Roy* dead in the paddock.
Im really in shock, Sez has been showing him for the past few years as she needed a bigger horse to go on with and he has been living there. They fed him at 4.30pm and went to get him to stable him for the night and he was in the middle of the paddock...not a scuff mark or struggle mark to be found. Too cold for snake bite, so I am guessing a heart attack..?
I've had him for eleven years (since he was just 4) and he really was one of the family, like a big cuddly dog who didnt know he was a horse.
Oh Ducks, how awful. So sorry honey. *hugs*
Bummer, he was too young. :(
Wow, sorry to hear it Ducks. Isn't that a pretty young age for a horse to die?
Sorry Ducks. Horses are a lot like dogs. They are near human. We tend to be closer to them. In turn, that makes saying goodbye even more difficult. Hugs and comfort your way.
Sorry to hear that, ducks. :(
What is it with the celler critters ??!!!!
Merc sorry to hear about yer dog
Ducky Sorry to Hear about yer Horse
:( Peace and best wishes, Merc and Ducks.
Poor Roy, only 15... I'm sorry to hear that. :(
Sorry to hear of your loss Ducks.
Thanks guys, yes Merc, its very young for a horse. He has stable buddies that are 27.
He had a lovely spoiled life.
Burial this afternoon, which is difficult, the excavator is digging a hole.
Im so sad :(
Mercenary and Ducks, I am really sorry to hear of your losses. My condolences. ::hugs::
Oh, that's too sad. :( So sorry for the loss of animal friends. I hope that you will remember the good times. There's nothing I can say.
It's tough losing a family member. Even, or maybe especially, those that walk on four legs.
Peace be with you and yours.
Damn Ducks. I'm so sorry for your loss. :(
My son's chick appears to have an intestinal blockage. :(
Give it mineral oil. 1/2 to 1 tsp.
And stand back. In the chicken raising world it's called cropbound.
She also has sour crop. I've flushed her crop a few times, but feeling her crop, I can't find a blockage. She's tentatively picking at food and I've been giving her droppers of yogurt mixed with water, but it's still not looking good.
There's been a death in the family, and I just found out about it tonight. Everyone assumed someone else had told me, but they hadn't, and the funeral is tomorrow in a town about 3 hours drive from here. I'd like to go, but at such short notice it's not possible.
That's what you get for keeping to yourself too much.
My mother in law has a sick obsession with my husband's ex wife. She has started posting pictures of her and my husband from when they were together on facebook.
Wow, do I feel special. :greenface
Wow. That really does suck. Sorry case.
Some prick is angling to have today's iotd taken down for copyright violation.
Sorry case - thats awful.
Oh, man, Case. That's terrible in an extra special way. :(
Some prick is angling to have today's iotd taken down for copyright violation.
That sux. I always wondered about that. :neutral:
Does your MIL realize she's hurting you?
It's a suckful thing for her to do, but I guess there must be something about the ex that she really liked. That doesn't have to mean there's anything about you that she doesn't like does it? Maybe she's just trying to be supportive of her grandkids and show that she doesn't hold a grudge?
There's only one solution, case. Mothers-in-law are 100% completely and totally driven by the presence and condition of their grandchildren. You have to have a baby with mac_tire, and then all of a sudden you'll be her new favoritest person in the whole world. [/voiceofexperience] :rolleyes:
...Or, the target of even more negativity as you fail to measure up to her high standards of mothering and begin the slow agonising process of ruining her grandchildren, forcing her to take charge and intervene for their future happiness :P
Sounds like a nasty situation Case. But, at the end of the day you're with your partner, not his family. Doesn't make it easy, but it's worth reminding yourself now and then.
Thanks, you guys, for your supportive suggestions. It has been 5 years, now and yes, it is a painful and near constant thorn in my paw for as long as I have known mac_tire.
Ali: Unfortunately, I am unable to talk to MIL about how it hurts me, because I am afraid she will not take me seriously, and instead cut me down to the ex-wife and in other gossip circles (primarily the religious faith group she is a part of.) Or she might take my complaints as efforts to control mac_tire and evidence that I am the reason for all negative changes in his (her) life. Either way, it will only make her worse. She once told me "he seems happy, but really he isn't...you are just a phase in his life that I know he will grow out of." I swear she must think he is still 6. Yes, she does favor the ex, because to her, she represented "things as they should be." They are both part of the same religious organization, which I don't participate in, and neither does mac_tire. There is a lot of "us vs. them" mentality with them, so they naturally sort of bond together, even at the expense of their children. Yes, I acknowledge that there needs to be an example for the grandchildren. That's cool. But some of her actions go beyond that and into betrayal. Ex, herself, even asked that MIL take the picture down citing that the image was "hideous." (yes, of course they are "facebook friends")
Clod: Thanks for your expert advice. ;) Yes, in fact, mac_tire are in the midst of those very discussions, though not for the benefit of the MIL relationship. She is either going to decide to get over the past and accept mac_tire's choices or not. I guess I need to deal with the fact that I have absolutely no power over whether or not she does that. And I should not flog myself over not being accepted by MIL. I suppose having a baby with mac_tire would suddenly turn the magnet to her and she would want to be uber-involved, which would not actually be an improvement. I must be careful not to let that affect me.
Dana: Yes, as we discuss the possibility of growing the mac_tire/case clan, that is a concern of mine. But, I have a very supportive husband, who will not allow anyone (even MIL) to control how we do things. You are right. I married mac_tire. Not MIL. And the fact that we live 10 hours from MIL is testament to the fact that husband doesn't leave himself or our relationship open to her meddling.
Anyway, I appreciate the encouragement. Now, it is mostly a me issue...I gotta let this kind of stuff go. Once I learn how to do that I am sure I will be stronger for it, all said and done. But I am sure I will have no hair left on my head! :thepain:
Also yesterday I found out one of my cousins is among the 450 troops heading to Afghanistan in May. He'll be there for at least 6 months.
We're all worried about his safety.
We sent of our 148th last week. Had a parade. God bless them.
Fuck.
Going to the adjuster's now.
Sucky!!! I am sorry, V. Did the other guy have insurance?
Christ, it got the bumper, the rear qtr panel, the hatch, the light, and it left a nasty scratch on your license plate.
Ouch, BigV. What happened there?
Sucky!!! I am sorry, V. Did the other guy have insurance?
Yes, she did. I'm in "good hands". If she'd used her *foot* properly, I wouln't have any need of her proxy hands, however good they may be. Actually, there's nothing wrong with her foot. This was entirely a mental lapse. Dangit.
Christ, it got the bumper, the rear qtr panel, the hatch, the light, and it left a nasty scratch on your license plate.
Thank you, sir, for the belly laugh! You forgot both the doors on the right side and the section of the unibody/pan that passes for a frame rail. It has a slight case of the crabs now. :(
Ouch, BigV. What happened there?
May I have the envelope, please......
And the award for the Most Ironic Dwellar in the Rhetorical Question Category is.... Chocolatl!
Honestly, I thougt, of all dwellars, *you* would know the answer to this question. Actually, I thought I'd be accused of being a copycat. Upon reflection I see that you're doing that girl thing by engaging me with questions while I'm doing the boy thing by being alert for conflict. My bad.
It's a fair question.
I was driving SonofV to the hospital yesterday for a previously scheduled dr appt. These appts are very difficult to get and I was determined to keep this one. I approached the end of a line of cars stopped for a red light on one of the arterials here. The line of cars was long enough to extend the whole (very short) block. I chose to stop so that I wouldn't be in the box (intersection) of the next cross street. That's illegal here, as it is in most places. There's a $115 fine if you're "caught in the box". Besides, its a bad idea. Ever been on the cross street wanting to drive straight ahead, but were blocked by some idiot who couldn't stand to be fifty feet further back of the STOPPED car ahead of him? Me too. So I don't block the intersection unless I'm not paying attention.
I was waiting for the light to turn green and for the cars to begin to move and I noticed in the rear view mirror (time s l o w s d o w n here) that that big old white Ford pickup truck was really big and getting bigger and damn quick. I thought, boy, I better scoot up and give this guy some more room (he's GINORMOUS in the mirror at this point) BOOOM!
No screech. No horn. Nothing. She just drove right into me, demolition derby style. Thank goodness I was rolling when she hit me, albeit slowly. I'm certain it deadend the impact. If I'd been up close to the car ahead I'd've been a VW sandwich. I rolled forward to the next driveway and pulled out of traffic. She had room to turn right onto the street I was trying not block. After verifying that SonofV was ok, I gave him the phone and told him to call Tink and explain what's going on and that we would be delayed.
Then I got out and stormed uphill to her truck. "You fucking idiot!!!" "Oh I'm so sorry, oh my god, I'm sorry, etc etc." We very quickly exchanged insurance information and I made sure the tires weren't rubbing anything flammable and that I wasn't leaking anything, flammable or otherwise, and we resumed our trip to the doctor.
In the future, I will verify insurance, driver's license and vehicle bona fides--this time there was none. That's a bad idea. I'll take a photo of her plates, her vehicle, her license, her face, her VIN, etc. This time I just took her word, which, so far, has turned out ok. The claim number she gave me has been validated. That's about all I know so far.
Thank guys and gals for your concern, I appreciate it. I will keep you updated.
It was an honest question and I meant no scheming girlness by it. :) As someone with recent experience in the "some damned fool just barreled right into me" line of accidents, I wondered about your specific hows and whys.
Glad to hear you and SonofV are okay. Hopefully CarofV will soon be okay, too!
Wow, that is just terrifying and awful, V! I'm so glad you guys re OK!
My chick died last night. Right in my hands. :( I buried her under the yellow rose in my back yard.
My chick died last night. Right in my hands. :( I buried her under the yellow rose in my back yard.
I'm so sorry.
Stupid world. Your story brought tears to my eyes, and
this story to my memory. Substitute chick for raccoon.
tiki, man, sorry...how are the kids taking it
also, what strikes me is that BigV's damages look way better than my own, which is comical, since I moving less than 3 miles an hour during impace in an accident I had a month ago
by "accident I had" I mean:
Slowly pulling out of a parking space with the grandmother like precision I employ, being a reluctant drive at best, I encountered very suddenly a white acura and slammed the breaks on, but not before removing a portion of the front of his car and denting quite severely the front of mine (over the driveside wheel).
What struck me was that I was barely moving, so he must have really been moving. Sadly, because it was my place to yield, and I can rightfully say how fast he was driving or HOW he came from nowhere (since that is the essence of coming from nowhere) and, also sadly, I suspect, because his is a great big dick (sadder, ultimately, for the stranger and his family than me) I am at fault.
So the dent stays for a bit.
also, that was a uniquely uncompelling post. apologies.
I have been told new people must post occasionally to prove they exist and aren't trolls.
Just because you post occasionally doesn't mean you're not a troll! ;)
But, welcome! I'm a reluctant driver also.
Oh man. I've never seen that particular Calvin & Hobbes before, it was so... reflective.
Daff, the kids are OK. I think Sam prepared himself before bed, he talked to her and cried a little. Juliet took it the worst; she came out around 4 am, saw the empty brooder, and came upstairs to wake me up and bawl. End of sleeping for me, so I'm running on three hours right now. Ophelia cried a little, demanded to see the body, and then was distracted by the new chicks I picked up at the store today.
For those of you who have been keeping track, you'll observe that I often wear a baseball cap. I was wearing one when I was rear ended yesterday and in my confusion after the crash, I didn't know where it went to. I was forced to deploy my backup cap, seen in this picture on the headrest of the passenger seat.
The original cap is also in the picture. Can you see it?
Yep, back on the package shelf behind the rear seat. That's where it landed when I was pushed out from underneath it by the idiot in the Ford. I'm tall enough that the headrest, and I use the term loosely here, at maximum extension comes about to the top of my collar. And when she hit me, my head snapped back and hurled my cap into the back.
Here endeth the (physics) lesson.
Holy crap!
Does your neck hurt?
Back ... and to the left ....
Back ... and to the left ....
Back ... and to the left!
When I lose my bra I never have a spare
Hey V,
Any chance we'll see a picture of you anytime soon with a smile on your mug? Or at least a little less like you're doing your Charles Bronson impression.
When I lose my bra I never have a spare
Does this happen often?
So I got knocked out of a mosh pit Tuesday night - landed on my tailbone and both elbows, hard enough to splt my right elbow enough to require four stitches. Hit my head, knocked out cold. The residual aches and pains are not going away and I am really tired of it after only two days. Have my daughter this weekend - know she'll want to play, but I will want to be sedentary. She's awesome enough she'll understand, but I hate feeling like I can't play with her. Perhaps I'll invite a playmate over for her...Thank you for letting me vent. That is all.
Your Highness, what was the band? Sounds like an awesome concert.
Hey V,
Any chance we'll see a picture of you anytime soon with a smile on your mug? Or at least a little less like you're doing your Charles Bronson impression.
You cut me dar.
That's just my regular face, the one I inflict on everybody I meet. You're not the first person to make this complaint. I'm just glad all I have to do is wear it, not look at it.
Please accept my sympathies.
Ouch V. Sorry to hear that. Why didn't you guys call the cops and get her a ticket? She did hit you from behind.
My MIL takes the stepkids for a week each summer (something that was initially put in place as part of an agreement that she has completely failed to adhere to since then, but I digress,) and ever since Minifob was born she's been pushing to have him for that week as well. We have always told her no, both because Minifob still has massive separation anxiety and would be miserable the entire time, but also because she just does not comprehend the reality of what it's like to care for him day-to-day, and can't wrap her head around the fact that it's not as simple as, "Oh, we'll just take him to fun activity X today, I'm sure he'll enjoy it!"
So, again this year she pushed to have him come stay with her, and again we told her no. But Mr. Clod, trying to phrase it delicately, told her that "Next year would be the soonest we could even possibly consider it." And now she's marching around talking about how she has to "get ready for next year." Mr. Clod has tried to reiterate our position more clearly, but her response to that has been to insist that what she will do is come stay with us for a week so that she can really get a feel for everything he needs--you know, because she'll need to know it for next summer! If we let her come stay, that will be a tacit acknowledgement that she gets to take him next summer, but if we tell her no we seem to be telling her she can't even come visit us. There's no way this will go away quietly on its own.
Yikes, Clod. Not a pleasant situation at all. I'm afraid I have no useful advice to offer...*hugs* sorry, best I can do.
Clod, what about phrasing in the fact that your family is still getting used to a new diet among many other things, and that what Minifob really needs right now is stability and routine? Is Grandma really prepared to go completely GFCF for a week?
Fob, by next summer he will have been to school for a year. maybe he'll be fine. sounds to me like she's willing to give it her all to be a good grandma to minifob. Sure, he's not your average kid, but even your average kid has separation anxieties the first night or two they spend away from mom and dad. Are you really doing him a favor by waiting until he's older for him to learn to deal with these feelings? i think it's great for her and minifob that she wants to come and stay and learn how to help him. I know, hard for you, but you knew this wasn't going to be a bed of roses. right? and maybe, just maybe it will be just fine. maybe she'll come to stay and get the hang of dealing with him, maybe he'll come to love and trust her, maybe she can even stay in for one night while you and Mr Fob get a well deserved night alone together.....
how far away does she live? can you maybe compromise with next year, but only two nights to start and we'll stay nearby so if he's trully inconsolable unmaneagable, we'll come and get him after one?
Got 4th place today at horseshoe tourney. Loser. This time.
I must be missing something. What is it that makes minifob not an average kid? I apologise if this is something well-covered that's passed me by.
See here Dana,
Minifob thread :)
Fobble - Im hearing ya. I too think its great that the MIL wants to have Minifob for a week, but I think a week is a looooong time, plus if I read it correctly, she will have the other kids as well? The overnight idea seems like a good start at least, then MIL will feel like she is getting a *chance* and you guys get a nite out.
My Mum is well and truely frazzled having the boys for a day and just over night, yes they are a handful, but they are just typical boys.
Thanks Ducks. I just assumed that was just a 'stuff my kid does' thread. I tend to skim over stuff like that, depending on my mood. I hadn't realised what the title meant.
I find the Minifob thread amazing, mostly because it started as a 'stuff my kid does' and evolved into such a wonderful view into the world of a parent of an autistic child. How it really unfolds in real life -- not what you see on TV. And what an inspiration Clod is! :thumb:
I feel like animals are running my life.
I've two kitties and a (new-ish) doggie.
There have been some hard feelings on both sides.
Last night, my sweet Carly threw up on my bedthrow. In the wash it went.
this morning, some poop magically appeared on my JUST CHANGED bedsheets. A little dog looked mighty guilty.
all I do is wrestle them apart and clean up after their puke and poopings. it's like having toddlers ALLLLLLL over again.
sigh.
I feel like animals are running my life.
all I do is wrestle them apart and clean up after their puke and poopings. it's like having toddlers ALLLLLLL over again.
sigh.
The bright side is that they don't live as long.:rolleyes:
My father and sister are ardent Jehovah's Witnesses.
For the past eight years, they've been not-so-subtlety hinting that they would like me to leave Freemasonry and join them in "The Truth".
And I have told them that I have no intention of quitting Masonry to make them happy.
My life has no bearing on them, but they insist on trying to interfere in mine.
Well, everything came to a head May 1st.
I was informed that I was no longer allowed to visit them, call them, or in any way contact them.
All because I didn't want to join their religion.
Fuck it.
Clod, what about phrasing in the fact that your family is still getting used to a new diet among many other things, and that what Minifob really needs right now is stability and routine? Is Grandma really prepared to go completely GFCF for a week?
She
thinks she is, but she isn't. Over Easter she delivered a bunch of candy, happy to tell me that she had checked the ingredients and "gluten" was not listed. :rolleyes: I have sent her several documents explaining what gluten is and the hundreds of ingredients that it hides in, but she doesn't understand.
Fob, by next summer he will have been to school for a year. maybe he'll be fine. sounds to me like she's willing to give it her all to be a good grandma to minifob. Sure, he's not your average kid, but even your average kid has separation anxieties the first night or two they spend away from mom and dad. Are you really doing him a favor by waiting until he's older for him to learn to deal with these feelings? i think it's great for her and minifob that she wants to come and stay and learn how to help him. I know, hard for you, but you knew this wasn't going to be a bed of roses. right? and maybe, just maybe it will be just fine. maybe she'll come to stay and get the hang of dealing with him, maybe he'll come to love and trust her, maybe she can even stay in for one night while you and Mr Fob get a well deserved night alone together.....
how far away does she live? can you maybe compromise with next year, but only two nights to start and we'll stay nearby so if he's trully inconsolable unmaneagable, we'll come and get him after one?
He had four nights away with both grandma and Daddy at home while I was in the hospital with Minifobette. That was pretty much four straight days of screaming. Just a few weeks ago we had a bit of an emergency and he did a bedtime with just Daddy, and he did mostly okay with that. But it was in his own bed following his (very rigid) bedtime routine. The last time we were at grandma's house over the holidays, even with me there he screamed until past midnight before finally passing out in his new sleeping environment.
And it's not just the inconsolable part, there are real dangers--aside from the danger of her feeding him the wrong foods, he still bolts unexpectedly in unfamiliar public places, and I know she can't run as fast as he can, nor is she physically strong enough to contain him when he's in full-on tantrum mode. On the upside, Minifob's aunt lives with her as well, and her, I do trust. She's a special education teacher, and just a lot more mentally
with it in general.
But yes, it's possible that with another year under his belt he'll be a totally different kid. I just don't want her to think I'm committing to things now that I can't predict.
She thinks she is, but she isn't. Over Easter she delivered a bunch of candy, happy to tell me that she had checked the ingredients and "gluten" was not listed. :rolleyes: I have sent her several documents explaining what gluten is and the hundreds of ingredients that it hides in, but she doesn't understand.
My Gran used to frustrate the hell out of my mum when I was a kid. She'd give me a slice of cake before mum had a chance to stop her and then when reminded "mum, you know she can't eat egg, right?"
Gran would respond with "Oh!" waving it away like mum's being silly "It's only a little bit of egg".
[eta] Gran was awful for stuff like that. I loved it. I got to eat all kinds of good stuff I wasn't allowed to eat. At six years old the immediacy of cake beat the distance of a bad flare, hands down every time.
She thinks
But yes, it's possible that with another year under his belt he'll be a totally different kid. I just don't want her to think I'm committing to things now that I can't predict.
That, right there, is exactly what you need to tell her. You have to make it contingent on
his capacity to stay away, not
her capacity to look after him.
My father and sister are ardent Jehovah's Witnesses.
For the past eight years, they've been not-so-subtlety hinting that they would like me to leave Freemasonry and join them in "The Truth".
And I have told them that I have no intention of quitting Masonry to make them happy.
My life has no bearing on them, but they insist on trying to interfere in mine.
Well, everything came to a head May 1st.
I was informed that I was no longer allowed to visit them, call them, or in any way contact them.
All because I didn't want to join their religion.
Fuck it.
Yes, fuck it. My first wife was a JW and after we divorced she did the same thing to her whole family. It's not you, it's them & their problem. You know damn well you did the right thing by not fucking up your life to placate them. Besides, you'd miss the roasted babies. :lol2:
Exactly.
And roasted babies are Mmmmmm, mmmmmmmmmm, delicious.
Yes, fuck it. My first wife was a JW and after we divorced she did the same thing to her whole family. It's not you, it's them & their problem. You know damn well you did the right thing by not fucking up your life to placate them. Besides, you'd miss the roasted babies. :lol2:
Could you do the same thing if it was one of your adult children?
You need a much larger fire for the adult children.
Or cut them in to Smaller pieces
Electrical problems.
My washer quit today in the middle of a cycle. Along with my water heater and my range. The clock and all the lights work on the range, but the elements will not heat up. When I turn the burner on, the washer 'tries' to work but doesn't. (can hear it kinda humming).
I went out and googled the meter and it looks fine except for one thing....it's not turning. Nary a bit. Hasn't turned in hours and I am running a crockpot, two window air conditioners, lights, 'puter, and ceiling fans.
'Splain that one for me please. I'm thinking poltergeist.
I'm thinking free power!! Woo!
Electrical problems.
My washer quit today in the middle of a cycle. Along with my water heater and my range. The clock and all the lights work on the range, but the elements will not heat up. When I turn the burner on, the washer 'tries' to work but doesn't. (can hear it kinda humming).
I went out and googled the meter and it looks fine except for one thing....it's not turning. Nary a bit. Hasn't turned in hours and I am running a crockpot, two window air conditioners, lights, 'puter, and ceiling fans.
'Splain that one for me please. I'm thinking poltergeist.
Sounds like you've lost one of the 110v legs, probably coming into the house.
The stove burners are 220v so when you turn them on the 110v from one leg is feeding over to the other (dead) leg and giving power to the washer, but not enough to run it. TURN IT OFF, you'll burn out the motor.
Yep. I did. Got an electrician coming tomorrow.
Then I can get upset about the bill.
I wonder if an exorcist would be cheaper?
One of my colleagues.
I need to show the kiddies the DVD of An Inconvenient Truth (which is in dire need of editing, IMHO).
To do this I collected a laptop, powerpoint projector, mini speakers, power board, extension cord, etc, and lugged these about half a K to the classroom, set it all up ... where I found that SOMEONE has CHANGED THE GOD DAMN PASSWORD ON THE LAPTOP and neither I nor our IT specialist can override it.
My lesson plan crashed and burned, I was able to review the first half of the movie which we watched last week and discuss the questions with them. Still I was NOT HAPPY.
Then in a meeting with the other critical thinking teachers and the college director I managed to spill moccha on my pants, only about a tablespoon worth, but that is plenty enough to leave a mark. They are fleecy woolen pants and will be difficult to clean.
Today involved one lesson, three meetings and next, a big bucket of marking.
Good thing they pay me for this.
Yep. I did. Got an electrician coming tomorrow.
Then I can get upset about the bill.
I wonder if an exorcist would be cheaper?
Don't turn on anything 220 volt.
If you have and old house with fuses, there is a pull out module with two cartridge fuses in it for the main. One of them could have fried.
A friend of mine called me with the same symptoms, 3 minutes before the Superbowl kickoff, a few years ago. A squirrel had committed suicide on the transformer and blown one leg of the input to the house.
It may not cost you that much. :thumbsup:
Oddly enough, Everything is working fine this morning and the meter is spinning to beat the band. Again.
I'm still having the electrician over to find out once and for all where the gremlin hides.
Update later, But I think you are right, Bruce. But how does it 'fix itself'? I hate mystery/suspense.
A blowout with Dazza is what's upsetting me RFN. Max tends to carry on in the evenings which is fairly common for babies anyway, and tonight he topped it off with two vomits. He's got the cold I've had for the last few days, so that's probably why. So after the second vomit Dazza says, "do you want me to get a bath ready for him" to which I respond, "he doesn't need a bath after every vomit" and then he says "don't snap at me please" and I say "I'm not perfect. I'm frustrated too you know". So he goes off to bed and so do Aden and Mav and I'm left literally holding the baby. I called out to the three of them "Did anyone bother to put Dolly (cat) out?" and Dazza yelled "YES!". He never yells. Neither of us do. I must have really pissed him off, but I'm pissed off too.
In fact, if the truth be told, I'm exhausted even though Max is a good baby. This cold has knocked me about, but I still haven't asked D to do any night time feeds or anything. I've stuck to the routine because that's best for Max, and also I've realized that I'm resentful towards Daryl because if it wasn't for him I wouldn't be so tired and all. It's not that I don't love Max, and I certainly can't imagine my life without him now that he's here...but I'm too old for all this.
I think I'm losing it.
That is all.
PPD - Keep an eye on yourself Ali. Talk to Dazza - better safe than sorry. Hang in there - we're here as you wish to vent.
Oddly enough, Everything is working fine this morning and the meter is spinning to beat the band. Again.
I'm still having the electrician over to find out once and for all where the gremlin hides.
Update later, But I think you are right, Bruce. But how does it 'fix itself'? I hate mystery/suspense.
It was a problem with the power company and they fixed it. Hopefully nothing of yours got damaged.
So the cut on my elbow from Tuesday went into full blown infection yesterday - started with a ltitle redness and swelling around noon - was miserable by about four. Went to urgent care, they pumped with IV antibiotics - get to go back fo rround two today. If this doesnt' do it they will check me in to teh hospital for major antibiotics, and cut the wound open so they can clean around the bursis. This sucks. God bless Vicodin or I'd be curled up in the corner like a little baby.
Ali - hang in there. Don't let the stress get between you and D. Cold + Baby = ask for more help. You're allowed.
oh, Queen! Take good care of yourself and watch that elbow!!! Be vigilant!
healing power your way....
Thanks. It feels better already! Let's send some ju ju Ali's way too.
Remember to unplug the stove from the 220v before removing the coil in the oven. I forgot. Thank God for breaker switches. I still have a blue spot in my vision after an hour.
Not a word from the goddam electrician yet. I'm headed to the Lodge at 1700 and if he calls me then, he'll just have to wait till 1900 or try again tomorrow. Nothing interferes with my scotch. Nothing.
Everything's working fine but I still want to know what's causing it. After I have three scotches.
PPD - Keep an eye on yourself Ali. Talk to Dazza - better safe than sorry. Hang in there - we're here as you wish to vent.
I don't think I have anything going on that serious classic. I'm just tired. Between not having a decent sleep for months, then a severe earache followed up by a nasty cold, and now a sick baby combined with a partner who although he means well, he's still on his L plates as a parent and sometimes makes things harder rather than easier.
So the cut on my elbow from Tuesday went into full blown infection yesterday - started with a ltitle redness and swelling around noon - was miserable by about four. Went to urgent care, they pumped with IV antibiotics - get to go back fo rround two today. If this doesnt' do it they will check me in to teh hospital for major antibiotics, and cut the wound open so they can clean around the bursis. This sucks. God bless Vicodin or I'd be curled up in the corner like a little baby.
Ali - hang in there. Don't let the stress get between you and D. Cold + Baby = ask for more help. You're allowed.
I'll just soldier on matey. That's usually the best way anyway. Push through the pain and all that right? ;) At least I'm feeling reasonably healthy again now, so with any luck, Max will be better in a few days and all this will seem like a bad dream.
First I'll have to make amends with Dazza though. Even though in my logical mind I know the best thing is to just talk it over, but emotionally, I think I need/want him to be my punching bag at the moment.
I'm such a bitch. I need to suck it up.
I hope things are better with your arm today. Sounds pretty nasty. Lucky you have good drugs. ;)
Good girl, Ali. I was hoping you'd be in a better frame of mind this morning. Arsenic hour/s when you are 100% healthy is enough to bring a strong women unstuck...so youre excused for being a tired, cranky cow and unreasonable occasionally. We still love you.
Thanks mate. It means a lot to know that someone somewhere still loves me. ;)
but but but - she called you a cranky cow. not just a regular ole cow, but a cranky cow!
hey Ali, I wouldn't go so far as to say I love you, but hang in there and don't rule out PPD either. You Aussies share the Brit "Stiff upper lip" thing, and tend to avoid labelling and help. Not saying you need to seek help, but just be aware of PPD lurking n the shadows. It's not a black and white thing.
but but but - she called you a cranky cow. not just a regular ole cow, but a cranky cow!
Yes, but she said it with love. ;)
hey Ali, I wouldn't go so far as to say I love you, but hang in there and don't rule out PPD either. You Aussies share the Brit "Stiff upper lip" thing, and tend to avoid labelling and help. Not saying you need to seek help, but just be aware of PPD lurking n the shadows. It's not a black and white thing.
That's true monster, and I did wonder last night if I might need help, but things were much better with the light of day upon them, so I'm just going to put it down to being tired and out of patience. I'm sure if I do it again Dazza will probably try and have me committed anyway. :D
So sorry Ali. I hope you get some good rest, and it all seems better, as so often happens.
Those first few months with a new baby are SO hard. I might have more than two kids if I hadn't felt like those first few months was a living hell. Dunno if it was PPD or just a husband who would rather remodel a bathroom than help with the baby (true story...with the first baby, he gutted our ONLY bathroom the week after she was born).
And then it gets better.
And then they become teenagers.
And then they become teenagers.
And then it become harder to deal with them, again. Only different problems, bigger, more complex. And then they move out.
Oh Ali, honey, you sound like you've had a really exhausting time. No wonder you're on a short fuse. Pat yourself on the back for not actually killing anyone :P
Nothing but excuses from the electrician.....I told him if he wasn't here by tomorrow afternoon FUGGITABADDIT. Bastard.
I should put this in the happy thread, but I just wanted to respond to you lovely people. :)
Thanks for your kind words. Things are much better today although the dogs did wake Max up about half an hour after his morning nap started. It was all forgotten when I went in to try and pat him back off to sleep and he greeted me with a big cheesey smile. Maybe he'd been awake the whole time. I don't know, but he sure didn't seem upset at all, and now he's happily flapping away under his tinkly toys on his little baby play gym thingy.
So, I just thought I'd tell you all that I feel better both physically and emotionally. I got a good sleep in last night with only one brief feed to contend with. Coupled with the fact that my apology to my darling husband was well recieved and I'd say it's all coming up roses today. :)
Nothing but excuses from the electrician.....I told him if he wasn't here by tomorrow afternoon FUGGITABADDIT. Bastard.
Call the electric company and ask them what the hell happened... they know.
Cum, bleed or blister, I WILL resolve the problem on THIS day.
what problem? I though it was working again?
If so, Bruce is right, it was a power company screw up. An electrician will probably be a waste of money. He will find nothing wrong with your wiring.
Cum, bleed or blister, I WILL resolve the problem on THIS day.
You sound very resolute on this issue. I like that.
Go get 'em CapN! And Hooray Ali! Glad there was an up after the down
(After three trips to the ER my elbow is FINALLY on the mend. Guess I should be in the happy thread too!)
Sounds verrry nasty Queeny, You on the mend now, then?
Yes, thanks, after three IV antibiotics. Now I'm on two oral antibiotics for the week. It was so swollen and red and.....I won't go into the details. It was nasty, but definitely getting better now. Still aches though. Kind of odd.
Keep an eye on it, honey. If it went to cellulitis there's a risk of reoccurence if it's not been thoroughly thwarted. Probably has given the amount of anti-biotics you've had. Chances are it's aching because the soft tissues have been traumatised through swelling. If it doesn't fade go see your doc.
Went to my doc yesterday - he's of the opinion that i am beating it. They marked the original redness/swelling in the ER - It has definitely receded. It hasn't drained for a couple of days now, but it's not hard where it's swollen anymore. Pretty sure I'm on the mend, but going back to my doc tomorrow just to be sure.
I had a bad infection in my foot once and they did that. They gave me gentamicin to clear it up. That's good stuff! I had to go to the doc for about a week afterwards and get injections in my butt as well. Are they doing that to you too? If so, aren't you just the lucky one! ;)
Call the electric company and ask them what the hell happened... they know.
Yep. It's (was) a come/go thing. Got it today,tho. As sworn.
Electrician was here this AM, said inside panel was fine, call Ga. Power. Did it.
Ga. Pwr shows up soon, pulls meter. Looks at service entrance cable. SMOKED. Disconnects pwr at pole, tells me I need to replace SE cable. And lugs in meter base. Called 'trician back. Did it. He tells me I must have city inspector out to google & approve. Did it.
Ga. power came back soon after I called, ran load test thingie, Reconnected, and VOILA!
Oh... gotta come up w/ subin' that's upsetting to maintain thread....
It upsets me that I didn't do this a long time ago instead of believing the problem would fix itself. Fuck me running. And again when I stop. IF I stop.:right::headshake
what problem? I though it was working again?
If so, Bruce is right, it was a power company screw up. An electrician will probably be a waste of money. He will find nothing wrong with your wiring.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
This is the post I meant to quote.
...keeps runnin'............:D
Everything, sadly.
I've been down for a few days - I mean feeling like there is a hand round my throat kinda down. I couldn't sleep last night, couldn't cry, couldn't scream - just lay there in despair.
I have a regular appointment scheduled with my GP today, but I know she won't be able to do anything. It's basically just me being desperately unhappy, so what can anyone else do?
Then I go to my alcohol counsellor. She gives me more time and is generally more upbeat (which is why I haven't gone for two weeks, because I hate to moan in the face of her positivity).
Maybe I'll drop in for acupuncture tomorrow.
Then again, making any decision right now is hard. I've get to get into the shower or clean my teeth today (10.40 at time of typing this). I've told myself that I will when the post comes. No, damnit, writing that I am ashamed. Am going to do it now. And change my bedclothes.
You're good for me, I don't care what the others say.
Glad I got going when I did - I'd just come out of the shower and Mum & Dad turn up.
Luckily I don't think there was anything amiss downstairs (I'm down, but I'm behaving after all) and I think Mum would have been pleased to hear the hairdryer.
They've gone again now, and I do feel better for havnig taken action.
Still waiting on the damned post though!
I had a pj day yesterday...and half of today. It is good to brush your teeth though. It always makes me feel better.
I guess me wearing my pj's all day isn't for the same reason, but I think it's ok to do it sometimes, especially when you're feeling down.
Do you think part of the reason you feel down is because you feel pressured to behave in a certain manner because you live at your parents? That's kind of what I get when I read a lot of your posts. That their influence makes you do things you might not otherwise do, which in a way is a good thing obviously, but it seems to be a bit negative a lot of the time. I get the impression that they don't acknowledge the fact that you're an adult and need help, and more that they treat you like a naughty child sometimes.
If I'm out of line just say so, but I just don't think it's really fair that's all.
Then I go to my alcohol counsellor. She gives me more time and is generally more upbeat (which is why I haven't gone for two weeks, because I hate to moan in the face of her positivity).
Don't do this. you gotta go. It's her job. Don't give yourself excuses not to go. You're off the sauce, but not out of the woods yet. Use all of the resources available to you. It's like lying to your doctor -the only person it hurts is you.
Sadly, I think part of me is feeling this low because they are away. I don't have the same pressures, therefore I dwell on things more. Mum is trying to push me to run before I can walk though. She's mentioned volunteering at least once a day, every day this week (we talk on the phone even when she's away).
She was only here for about 7 minutes this morning and still managed to ask whether I;d gone to the Volunteer Agency yesterday. No Mum, yesterday I wanted to either get ridiculously drunk, or die, or both. I will have to go of course. Partly because she will wear me down, partly because I know it's a step back to normality. I'll talk to my CPN first though.
Monster I know I should have gone to Oasis sooner, but it all seems so pointless. It's just a chat, I'm still on the waiting list for actual sessions. And I have the same chat with my Doctor every week, and my CPN (although she's on holiday right now). It's just telling another person how miserable I feel and it gets me down. None of the people I speak to at present are able to offer a solution, something to work on or anything steps I can take to help resolve the situation.
Sorry, it's all going to be negative from me in this mood.
Maybe I'll pick up a bit this afternoon.
I'll go to the Volunteer Bureau tomorrow, so what't available at least. It's a walk into town, so it will occupy me and get me out of the house.
Hey, I just thought I haven't nagged you for a while, you might be missing it ;)
Go for a long brisk walk rfn. work up a really good tireness to help you sleep this evening.
Don't worry, walked to the Drs & back, walking to Oasis at 16.00 and then on into town (and back) because the postman came in the 40 minutes I was out of the house. Of course! Still, it means I will get about 3 miles in all told. And I will probably get the secondhand boots I bought from eBay two weeks ago. If I do, I'll post a pic of me with them on in the Happy thread (their non-appearance has been a daily disappointment).
Another friend has passed away seemingly suddenly, at the age of 55. He had cancer, but it must have come quickly...I saw him just a few months ago. Former mayor of my town, and reportedly the first libertarian ever elected as a mayor in Ohio.
"He was principled and he wasn't afraid to fight the system," Martin said. "His concern was always doing the right thing and making sure the minority was represented."
:( sorry to hear that S123.
Keep on it SG - Now is the time to maintain and not let it get to you. The closer you get, the more it tries to trick you.
One of my colleagues.
I need to show the kiddies the DVD of An Inconvenient Truth (which is in dire need of editing, IMHO).
To do this I collected a laptop, powerpoint projector, mini speakers, power board, extension cord, etc, and lugged these about half a K to the classroom, set it all up ... where I found that SOMEONE has CHANGED THE GOD DAMN PASSWORD ON THE LAPTOP and neither I nor our IT specialist can override it.
My lesson plan crashed and burned, I was able to review the first half of the movie which we watched last week and discuss the questions with them. Still I was NOT HAPPY.
Then in a meeting with the other critical thinking teachers and the college director I managed to spill moccha on my pants, only about a tablespoon worth, but that is plenty enough to leave a mark. They are fleecy woolen pants and will be difficult to clean.
Today involved one lesson, three meetings and next, a big bucket of marking.
Good thing they pay me for this.
So, the next time I get the same group together, I am prepared. On Tuesday I went to the store room and checked that all the laptops worked properly, and was careful to book one which I was happy with.
On Thursday morning I had the class. Got the laptop, projector, spekers, cables etc and took them about 1/2 a kilometre to the teaching room and got everthing fired up only to hit a problem. One of the start up files has somehow gone missing or been corrupted in the 40 hours since I checked it!!!! Total failure. Plan B was already used in the previous class.
So I dash back 1/2 a K to the main building, grab another laptop, start it, check it is working (it is) and dash back to the classroom.
I plug everything in, insert the DVD .... and watch as the DVD playing software crashes. Repeatedly. Goddamn mother#&%*er.
By this time the class is half over anyway so I wrote the whole lesson off and sent the kids away. I've never had to cancel a class like that before and I was NOT amused.
Grrr.
Then I had to carry all that gear back, too.
Gas jumped up 30 cents/gal since last weekend. Fucking gouging goddam thieves. Just in time for folks traveling to see their dear old Mom. I'd like to personally choke the motherfuckers that are responsible. And then piss on them. It is a crime. Sumbitches.
Then I had to carry all that gear back, too.
You are too kind, I'd have probably burst a blood vessel by then and called someone, anyone and told them what happened and where their worthless equipment was if they wanted it.
Oh and get their billing address so you can send them an invoice to refund your time and the time of all the kids who got nothing for their tuition attributed to that class.
College tuition, I will be paying over $60,000 next year.
Parent's dog peed on my floor again last night because they didn't put her in her cage.
First thing I did this AM was step in it. I was already 30min late waking up.
So I told them and asked them to please clean it up, their dog, their responsibilty. Makes sense to me. Not to them, aparently its my fault mom forgets to put her dog away. Its my fault because I'm awake, so she can't turn off the lights, if she can't turn off the lights she can't remember to put the dog in her crate. Then my parents tell me to stop blaming others for my mistakes.
I'm being blamed for their mistakes!
BTW: unlike other people's children on this forum, please remember I pay for everything. I pay rent, I bought my car, I pay my insurance, I pay my tuition, I pay for food, I pay for electricity...need I go on?
College tuition, I will be paying over $60,000 next year.
Good on you...I know it's not easy but educating your children is a very good thing.
Are you going to make them offset some of the costs through college work-study? You should, if they are not currently working, or don't plan to while at college. Some of my best times in college were working in the cafeteria.
College tuition, I will be paying over $60,000 next year.
I'll be with you. I am supporting 2 college aged kids now.
shoulda killed 'em when they was pups.
Parent's dog peed on my floor again last night because they didn't put her in her cage...
So I told them and asked them to please clean it up, their dog, their responsibilty.
I know you support yourself, but the bottom line is you're still family.
The rule is first one to see it cleans it. That's the rule here anyway - if I see Mia has had an accident, I clean it up. If Mum sees Diz-puke on the stairs she cleans it up.
I get that it was a direct result of your Mum's action (or lack of it) and I guess you don't have a dog yourself. And I feel for you stepping in dog wee.
Chin up - you'll get your own place one day.
Are you going to make them offset some of the costs through college work-study? You should, if they are not currently working, or don't plan to while at college.
One is, the other I have to look into. His speed is something less than that of a snail in sand.
shoulda killed 'em when they was pups.
I'm rethinkin this at this very moment. Just add that to my long list of regrets. :yelsick:
Deedle is home sick with hives. :( This may make working today challenging, to say the least.
I gave her a lavender bath and the hives seem fine now, but i can't really take her back to school, so... sigh.
I know you support yourself, but the bottom line is you're still family.
The rule is first one to see it cleans it. That's the rule here anyway - if I see Mia has had an accident, I clean it up. If Mum sees Diz-puke on the stairs she cleans it up.
I get that it was a direct result of your Mum's action (or lack of it) and I guess you don't have a dog yourself. And I feel for you stepping in dog wee.
Chin up - you'll get your own place one day.
I usually do clean up. I don't have my own dog, it died. I can't get over my borderline hate for the one my parents have, which makes dealing with it all that much harder.
Usually I clean it up, it ALWAYS pees in my room, so I am always the one who has to clean it. This morning I woke up 30min late for work already, that was the other reason I asked her to clean it. I didn't even get breakfast this AM.
Don't waste energy hating a dog. They will love you anyway.
best friend, lump in boob, specialist did not put on happy-it-might-be-a-cyst face.
Don't fret too much Monster! I had a scary go about ten years ago but after sending the offending lump to three labs they determined it was "nothing". :rolleyes:
Mon, hope all turns out well. No use in freaking out, of course not somethin thats easy to control. Try keeping busy, and spending as much time with your friend as you can.
Originally Posted by ZenGum
One of my colleagues.
I need to show the kiddies the DVD of An Inconvenient Truth (which is in dire need of editing, IMHO).
To do this I collected a laptop, powerpoint projector, mini speakers, power board, extension cord, etc, and lugged these about half a K to the classroom, set it all up ... where I found that SOMEONE has CHANGED THE GOD DAMN PASSWORD ON THE LAPTOP and neither I nor our IT specialist can override it.
My lesson plan crashed and burned, I was able to review the first half of the movie which we watched last week and discuss the questions with them. Still I was NOT HAPPY.
Then in a meeting with the other critical thinking teachers and the college director I managed to spill moccha on my pants, only about a tablespoon worth, but that is plenty enough to leave a mark. They are fleecy woolen pants and will be difficult to clean.
Today involved one lesson, three meetings and next, a big bucket of marking.
Good thing they pay me for this.
So, the next time I get the same group together, I am prepared. On Tuesday I went to the store room and checked that all the laptops worked properly, and was careful to book one which I was happy with.
On Thursday morning I had the class. Got the laptop, projector, spekers, cables etc and took them about 1/2 a kilometre to the teaching room and got everthing fired up only to hit a problem. One of the start up files has somehow gone missing or been corrupted in the 40 hours since I checked it!!!! Total failure. Plan B was already used in the previous class.
So I dash back 1/2 a K to the main building, grab another laptop, start it, check it is working (it is) and dash back to the classroom.
I plug everything in, insert the DVD .... and watch as the DVD playing software crashes. Repeatedly. Goddamn mother#&%*er.
By this time the class is half over anyway so I wrote the whole lesson off and sent the kids away. I've never had to cancel a class like that before and I was NOT amused.
Grrr.
Then I had to carry all that gear back, too.
Monday morning. Same class. Same boring and poorly done Al Gore movie. Different computer. Turn it on before leaving the store room. Works. Carry all crap to class room (1/2 km). Connect all cables. Insert DVD.
Error. Software does not have converter to play this media. Go #%@& yourself, human.
I had to borrow a laptop from one of the students to finally play the bloody thing.
This is not okay.
what a bitch.
what a bitch.;)
I was just visiting my sister. Her neighbor's son is one of the peanut-allergic boys who was at my nephews birthday party recently. What's upsetting me is that her just turned 2 year old child was found unresponsive in his crib on Thursday.... he was diagnosed with ADEM today.
I know this is bad, but what is ADEM?
From Wiki
Acute disseminated encephalomyelitis (ADEM) is an immune mediated disease of the brain.[1][2][3] It usually occurs following a viral infection but may appear following vaccination, bacterial or parasitic infection, or even appear spontaneously. As it involves autoimmune demyelination, it is similar to multiple sclerosis, and is considered part of the Multiple sclerosis borderline[4][5] diseases. The incidence rate is about 0.8 per 100,000 people per year.[6]. Although it occurs in all ages, most reported cases are in children and adolescents, with the average age around 5 to 8 years old.[7][8][9] The mortality rate may be as high as 5%, full recovery is seen in 50 to 75% of cases, while up to 70 to 90% recover with some minor residual disability.[10] The average time to recover is one to six months.
ADEM produces multiple inflammatory lesions in the brain and spinal cord, particularly in the white matter. Usually these are found in the subcortical and central white matter and cortical gray-white junction of both cerebral hemispheres, cerebellum, brainstem, and spinal cord,[11] but periventricular white matter and gray matter of the cortex, thalami and basal ganglia may also be involved.
When the patient suffers more than one demyelinating episode, it is called Recurrent disseminated encephalomyelitis[12] or Multiphasic disseminated encephalomyelitis[13](MDEM).
Acute Disseminated Encephalomyelitis. Sometimes call Post infectious or post vaccination encephalomyelitis.
The good news is that there is a good chance that your friends son will recover fully. I hope this is the case. His parents must be out of their minds right now. :(
:( :(
friend got mamogram today, more lumps discovered, looks bad, biopsy rescheduled for tomorrow because it will take 4 hours.
No biopsy today means she didn't need me today. Tomorrow she does, but I can't be there....
This stupid disease needs nailing. It takes too many good people and seems (to me) to be on the increase This woman has the healthiest diet I have ever seen, she's beating herself up over being a smoker for a couple of years at Uni.
fuck it.
ADEM, in (relatively) plain English, seems to be that the lad's immune system is attacking the insulation around the wires inside his brain.
As Ali says, good recovery rates.
Best wishes for your friend, monster.
Jinx -- is it your nephew, or your sister's neighbor's son that was diagnosed with ADEM? Either way, I hope everything works out okay.
Mum.
SHOUTING AT DAD.
Crikey me, it's not his fault he can't hear her. Her hearing is perfect (as near as I can tell) and his is not. Neither is mine.
She goes from normal level speaking, to SHOUTING when Dad says, "Eh?" (Sarf London response meaning, "I'm sorry, please repeat yourself, I'm afraid I didn't hear.")
Example:
I hear: Did you blah blah mumble mumble [Sky News in background] whatever?
Dad: Did I what, sorry?
Mum: DID. YOU. ASK. MY. DAD. IF. HE. NEEDS. ANY. THING. FROM. TES. CO?
Dad: Oh yeah, yeah, gonna get him some milk and -
Mum [interrupts] You'd have heard me if you'd turned the television off. Oh no, too much trouble, bloody deafo
Me: [silently dies...]
She doesn't do it to me. Thank goodness. I'd be torn between hiding in my bedroom and crying and thrusting smallprint under her nose and saying, "Read that now, read it, go on read it you shortsighted idiot!"
But she undermines Dad about 10 times a day by mocking his lack of hearing. And she makes a dyslexic man (still my Dad, here) READ most of the programmes they watch on TV, by having the sound so low. I can't hear it either - I ask to have the words on, or the volume up whenever I watch too.
I know they have survived 41 years of marriage. I know she has been like this the whole time and Dad has survived. And I know Dad is not a saint (it's been good seeing he has flaws too - I've lost some of my hero worship but regained some realtionship reality). But it really, really shits me. Y'know?
I am damn near deaf myself. (Dr. says I need hearing aids in BOTH ears) I can relate to this. People just don't understand unless they experience things personally. I find myself wishing (almost daily) that some people would become hearing impaired for three to five days and then recover. Sure, having the TV loud contributes to our not hearing folks. But the reason it's loud is than we're fucking deaf. Sheesh. Shit.
That is the main reason I love internet. Because I don't have to be embarrased by saying "huh", "what", and "excuse me" continuously.
That is the main reason I love internet. Because I don't have to be embarrased by saying "huh", "what", and "excuse me" continuously.
__________________
Please type slowly. I can't read very fast.
:lol2:
i think your sig line is amusing her in light of the topic....
The breast cancer is confirmed, now we just await to hear how bad, but apparently the tumor is affecting the nerve and so the biopsies were excruciating despite the local. :( I totally hate this. i'm really worried because although my friend admitted she doesn't do monthly exams, i know she's a health freak and always at the doc and she's noticed changes over the last week since she found the lump, so i think it's a fast-acting bastard.....
I hate this.
She's gutted. She could barely talk to me tonight.
I really fucking hate this.
Thanks for listening
Obviously we posted at the same time... which is why I deleted the above post.
Sorry, Mon.... hang in there. Get well vibes to your friend.
Oh monnie, I'm so very sorry. It's going to be a very rough ride. :(
Best wishes for your friend.
Mon, my best to you and your friend.
Oh Monnie. What a horrible situation. My best wishes to your friend. And to you. It's never easy to watch a good friend go through something like this.
Sorry to hear that Monster.
Fucking cancer.
My thoughts are with you and your friend, monnie.
Let us know when you find out what kind of CA this is...and SG is right. Fucking cancer.
Sucks.
I'm so sorry, monster. I hope you are able to provide her some comfort and support.
I'll reiterate: fucking cancer.
I'm sorry, monster. It's good she has a friend like you.
So sorry to hear, monster. :( Best wishes for your friend, for you, and for the families.
Me too. Cancer sucks. Fucking cancer.
yeah Fuck cancer. thanks all. I don't officially have the go-ahead to tell other people, that's why i'm crying to you lot because you don't know her so that can't hurt, right?
She sounded a little better today and hopefully I will see her tomorrow ....but she's meeting with the specialist first thing to get the biopsy results and whatever, so she may duck out...
stoopit fucking potato disease
Fuck cancer.
The neighbor boy is improving. He has recovered his sight and was moving his arms slightly today.
well that's good to hear, jinx. i hope the trend continues
But she undermines Dad about 10 times a day by mocking his lack of hearing.
Tell your dad that footfootfoot says he needs to keep his pimp hand strong, it's never too late. And as a bonus he will be gettin his freak on like he never imagined. You be wishing you was deaf after that.
And as for fucking cancer:
"Not with your dick and Mike pushing."
As they say.
I lost my wife of 16 years to fucking cancer in the early nineties. Cancer don't care who the fuck you are.
More and more people are beating it these days. That's the good news. I really believe that in my grand children's lifetime it will be near totally treatable. Fuck the Hubble. Let's research cancer. And kick it's ass. To outer space.
Amen capn.
What's bugging me today...is that I got a D in some shitty religion class that I hated, and now I might lose my financial aid, a hefty sum $15,000.
Fuck.
oh and to monster: sorry about your friend. i hope everything turns out ok. sorry :(
That's shit Apollo :( Bad luck mate. Any other funding streams you can look at? Any chance of doing a resit on that class?
Drinking.
I am.
Sorry.
And Mum & Dad are ignoring me.
I'm hiding upstairs.
I wish they'd talk to me about it - I can't talk to them about it, I'm drunk.
Sorry again, I know people here have respected me for being sober.
So sorry Sundae. Talk to us about it, we're always here for you, you know.
:grouphug:
No, hon, we respected your desire to be sober and more importantly your attempts to achieve that goal. Neither of those things have changed. Amongst other things. Hard to change your life in one fell swoop. Fits and starts. Steps forward, steps back.
Don't beat yourself up about it. Just set the next set of steps.
Exactly what Dana said. And actually, I respect you for being honest with us about it too. We love you for your hoensty, and your overwhelming desire to be happy against all odds. Don't beat yourself up, just start over when you can.
And BTW, Fuck cancer.
SG - Be upset with yourself.....
ok thats enough of that - now move on and get back on the horse you've chosen to ride. We'll still be here either way and our support will not diminish.
Oh, and listen to that manc tart Dana - she's got the right outlook.
Yeah! You mustn't feel bad about yourself SG. I believe glatt. It's going to be OK.
I'm sobering up now.
The attitude downstairs is very frosty though.
Maybe I'll talk to Mum tomorrow.
Drunk or not I'm still their daughter, and they're not enabling me to drink.
I can't drink tomorrow anyway - no money. All bills/ debts paid and I do have food. For me and the boy. And litter.
Felt I should say that - Diz doesn't suffer if I drink.
Only I do.
Not exactly upsetting, actually mildly amusing, but on Pilau's behalf I'd like to offer up the fact that it's blowing a gale and raining heavily outside. he is currently hiding under my desk. I can feel the vibrations from his shivering, through my feet.
he doesn't like weather.
Apologised to Mum re drinking.
Tried to have a proper chat with her.
She said, "I don't know why you do it either. All I know is it makes us not like you."
This effectively ended the conversation.
I've been hearing this all my life - "I can't love you if", "I don't like you when" etc etc.
I would like to point out that I am not violent when drunk. Nor abusive. I did not steal from my parents to fund my drinking, and I disposed of my cans myself. I hid in my room the whole time.
This does not make it right. Of course not! And the potential for the opposite (above) is sadly always there. Except the violent and abusive parts.
I just wish they were different. As I'm sure they do me.
Oh yeah, and I want to die.
As the wise man say, your parents really know how to push your buttons... after all, they installed them.
You may drink to avoid the pain of not being perfect, but who told you that you have to be perfect?
Nobody's perfect. Not even me.
She said, "I don't know why you do it either. All I know is it makes us not like you."
This effectively ended the conversation.
I've been hearing this all my life - "I can't love you if", "I don't like you when" etc etc.
.
next time, don't let it end the conversation. Next time tell her "I don't like myself either when I drink". Tell her what you're telling us. If you can't say it, write it down and mail her a letter. tell her "It's hard for a person to love themselves when they feel their parent's love is conditional" Tell her you want to be the person she likes all the time, but if she wants that too, she must support you in the way that helps you, not necessarily the way she feels is appropriate.
it really seems like you two could benefit from going to some counselling together.....
Do you recall a specific incident that caused this minor puncture in the wagon wheel?
they fnck you up, your mum and dad
they do not mean to but they do
they give you all the sh1t they had
and add some extra just for you .... Philip Larkin
UT and Monster have good things to say here, SG. Hugs to you.
Stress.
I have the opportunity to sell my practice to an associate for an amount that eliminates all of my debt save the house and one car. In this deal I would continue on as an employee with an solid payout on my production and would keep my current clients with no disruption to them beyond a change to the letterhead.
I'm tired and worn out from being "the decider" and truth be told I'm just kind of tired being entirely on my own. IfI don't like working with him (even though we've worked together loosely for years) I can walk away and start over after 24 months with my clients intact. It shouldn't be that hard of a decision but there is just something gut churning about giving up the "I own my company" bit. :(
Stress.
I have the opportunity to sell my practice to an associate for an amount that eliminates all of my debt save the house and one car. In this deal I would continue on as an employee with an solid payout on my production and would keep my current clients with no disruption to them beyond a change to the letterhead.
I'm tired and worn out from being "the decider" and truth be told I'm just kind of tired being entirely on my own. IfI don't like working with him (even though we've worked together loosely for years) I can walk away and start over after 24 months with my clients intact. It shouldn't be that hard of a decision but there is just something gut churning about giving up the "I own my company" bit. :(
Is it "giving up" or "realising the value of your investment of time and effort"?
At times like this I toss a coin to decide. You have to
really believe that you will do what the coin tells you to do when you look at it, and I do mean really. Note your reaction to what the coin told you to do - relief? Misery? Then ... go with your gut, follow that reaction.
You can't use this method too often, but just now and again you can suspend your disbelief long enough to find out what the reaction tells you.
This isn't about giving up. My practice is at a point where a decision has to be made. I can't grow any more without significant investment (which I just can't swing right now), but it has significant value to anyone who purchases it. I have good name recognition and networks that could take someone else considerable time and effort to establish if they start from scratch. At the same time, if I sell and stay as an employee the new owner would receive value from my continued production. They win. I win.
I'm burned out and tired of having everything rest solely on me. In all honesty if I could think of something better to do I'd walk away entirely.
Maybe at some point in the future you will think of something better to do, and having sold the business will be able to walk away. In the meantime, this sounds like a good solution. Hard to swallow, I know. But you may find that, with the pressure of being 'the decider' removed, you rediscover some enthusiasm for what you do. You are, after all, very good at it. Either way, it strikes me you've done marvellously well to create a going concern in this economic climate, and getting it big enough to sell, and hand over the stressful running of it is a major achievement. You deserve to feel proud of yourself for that.
The buyout sounds awfully good to me... because you sound burned out, and this gives you 24 months when it can become clear to you whether you're better off (for whatever value of "better" is important for you) as "the employee" or "the decider."
I can't grow any more without significant investment (which I just can't swing right now)
"Grow" in what sense? More clients? More $$$ under management? What happens if you don't grow?
With your resume showing you as a successful business owner, I imagine you'll be a "decider" no matter where you work. This has been my experience.
I sold my company to my current boss (who is now my employer) a couple years ago. He matched my salary and tossed in benefits. Really scary at first, and honestly quite humbling.
It wound up to be the best decision I've ever made. Except the one about skinny dipping with Becky Sue. That was good.
I miss some things about it. The competition is the main thing.
Good luck with this, lookout.
My family. My dad. Fucking jesus dick on a pogo stick.:headshake
I used to have serious issues with my Dad, then I learned to just say, "yes Dad" and go ahead and do my own thing, or alternatively tell him I'm really not interested in what he's talking about (he used to spend a lot of time bitching about my mother even though they've been divorced for years, and she's passed away. As you can imagine, particularly after her death I really wasn't interested in his bitching) He doesn't bother doing it anymore because I stopped talking to him for almost 2 years because of it.
We have a great relationship now. We've both learned some lessons.
Stress.
I have the opportunity to sell my practice to an associate for an amount that eliminates all of my debt save the house and one car. In this deal I would continue on as an employee with an solid payout on my production and would keep my current clients with no disruption to them beyond a change to the letterhead.
I'm tired and worn out from being "the decider" and truth be told I'm just kind of tired being entirely on my own. IfI don't like working with him (even though we've worked together loosely for years) I can walk away and start over after 24 months with my clients intact. It shouldn't be that hard of a decision but there is just something gut churning about giving up the "I own my company" bit. :(
Tough situation mate. I wish you well.
I used to have serious issues with my Dad, then I learned to just say, "yes Dad" and go ahead and do my own thing, or alternatively tell him I'm really not interested in what he's talking about (he used to spend a lot of time bitching about my mother even though they've been divorced for years, and she's passed away. As you can imagine, particularly after her death I really wasn't interested in his bitching) He doesn't bother doing it anymore because I stopped talking to him for almost 2 years because of it.
We have a great relationship now. We've both learned some lessons.
My dad is actually awesome, and we have a great relationship... it's just that I think he may have done something REALLY stupid.
And just family drama. There's only so much you can take before it stops being cute and eccentric and starts feeling like a circus tent.
So the elbow that I split open three weeks ago is still in pain - got x-rays yesterday - My regular doc called me this a.m. to tell me he's referring me to an orthopedic doc.
This isn't about giving up. My practice is at a point where a decision has to be made. I can't grow any more without significant investment (which I just can't swing right now), but it has significant value to anyone who purchases it. I have good name recognition and networks that could take someone else considerable time and effort to establish if they start from scratch. At the same time, if I sell and stay as an employee the new owner would receive value from my continued production. They win. I win.
I'm burned out and tired of having everything rest solely on me. In all honesty if I could think of something better to do I'd walk away entirely.
Sorry, I wasn't entirely clear; what I meant was "giving up the 'I own my company' bit" ...
The consensus here seems to be give it a try. It's not a forever decision. Take 24 months of not being in the hot seat and see how you feel then ...
Best of luck whatever you decide!
Last night one of my closest friends, B, called me because one of his hens had been mauled and was in bad shape. He figured she needed to be put down, but he couldn't do it... he loves his hens, and this one, Buffy, was his favorite... the most docile and friendly of the three.
On the phone I was asking him questions about the injury, hoping it wasn't as severe as he thought, but when I got there it was... oh my god... fucking awful. :( I think a raccoon must have cornered her and then basically just started eating. I've never seen anything like it, and I didn't know a living thing could be damaged that badly and still be walking. Poor, poor little hen. Me and another friend sent him on a walk around the block while I took care of and buried Buffy. Then we took B out and got dinner and beer and hung out with him a while.
:( :( :(
Aw, Tiki. A pet is a pet. Thanks for taking care of Buffy, and your friend.
Thanks guys.
I know it's a risk of keeping chickens, but god. It was heartbreaking.
I've had chronic sinus infections/problems for awhile now. Was finally referred to an ENT, which before I had no clue about, my last doc just kept me on antibiotics. Was supposed to see the ENT today, come to find out our health insurance $$ has run out. So I can't go. I can't buy prescriptions or see any doctors unless I pay out of pocket.
We, as a family, have a $5000 deductible before insurance starts paying. The company, my dad's job, paid $2500. So we thought we had a $2500 deductible left. Wrong. We have $3750 left that we have to pay out of pocket. For some reason the first $2500 only counts as half off the deductible. I know alot of people don't have any health insurance, right now I might as well not either. I can't afford to pay for all my prescriptions, lab tests, doc visits out of pocket. Which triply pisses me off because we pay over $500/mo for health insurance.
I feel your pain. I had a tonsillectomy and sinus surgery a few years ago that ended up costing $14,000 out of pocket, despite having insurance.
Health insurance is such a racket these days.
shitty rainy fucking weather.
Moar, that's awful. Especially, as you say, since you are paying for the insurance. That's a kick in the teeth. Bad enough to be without insurance...but paying for insurance and not being able to call on it, that really is shit.
Those insurance companies need getting ahold of.
I have this pain, left hand lower back and oh.my.god...its crippling.
Ouch, there's damn little you can do that doesn't affect the lower back. :(
Flu and an infection in my mouth. Everything seemed to hit me at once on friday night. Must have been holding off til after my finals. But my word, did I ever sink like the proverbial stone! Yesterday passed in a haze of fever and sleep. Couldn't walk the dog, so mum took care of him for me. Couldn't eat, except for a little soup. I smoked maybe half a cigarette, across the whole day.
Everywhere hurts. There's a big lump on my tongue at the back that makes swallowing difficult. My mouth hurts. My back hurts. My ribs hurt. My chest hurts. But...I am at least feeling closer to human today.
I did come into the cellar a couple of times yesterday but after 5 mins had to switch off. Couldn't look at the screen for more than a minute or so, before my head and eyes hurt.
*smiles* like I say I am feeling a little better today. A little more like myself (just a sick version). Yesterday was weird. I was really out of it. Last night must have been the peak. I was having fever dreams all night. And then woke feeling like I was myself again.
So...my plans to spend the weekend listening to Doctor Who audio plays went for a burton, I couldn't concentrate on anything. I'm hoping that I continue to feel better and I will maybe listen to one later.
went for a burton
Is that a reference to Richard Burton's behavior?
Urr. No.
I have no idea where the phrase comes from. It's usually "gone for a burton".
I just looked it up, and apparently it's almost unused now....which surprised me, cause I use it and hear it a lot.
Means it didn't work out.
A dude I have just met (noob at the lodge) in an inane attempt at gallantry, introduced me to his wife.
Verbatim:
"Marcie, I'd like you to meet the Sargent at Arms, Tony. Tony is also an EX MARINE."
Marcie: "Great to meet you, Tony. Sam and I will be getting drunk on Monday at a BBQ at our house. We'd love for you to join us. After all... Monday is YOUR SPECIAL DAY!. Hope to see you there."
I don't think so. What a pair of asshats.
Sounds to me like she was propositioning you. ;)
Damn! I never thought of that. I really AM getting old.:smack:
geez Dana get well soon. and Morthan...I hope something is resolved for you.
Thanks sky and dana. Trying to shop for new, but its a pain.
ducks, take care of that back! Hope your kids get well soon too.
capn "getting drunk and BBQ" how did you miss THAT clue? You can't be that old.
Today's irritation is really carried over from yesterday. Went house shopping with my sis and mom. Found one house where the people were home and completely willing to show us when we called. I was first at the door, met the lady, then intro'd my sis as the prospective buyer. That was my first big mistake.
2nd mistake was making any comment at all about the house as we were looking (all compliments by the way). Aparently saying "this is a big driveway, you could have a lot of cars here." Is very rude.
So when we got done and back in the car my sis immediately started telling me how stupid and rude I am.
Why is that a rude thing to say? I don't get how that's rude.
I am feeling somewhat better thanks:) Have managed solid food today (see happy thread).
So-called "friends" of my girlfriend playing mind games with her during a very rough patch in her life.
Just as well I'm not in London any time in the near future. I can become very inventive, when provoked.
Why is that a rude thing to say? I don't get how that's rude.
It isn't directly rude, but it is an unspoken rule of house-shopping that you don't comment about the house in front of the current owner. Most people have this weird emotional connection to their house, like they want you to love it exactly the way it is, rather than the obvious reality that you're going to bring in your own furniture and all that. There's a possessiveness that is very hard to explain. You're selling it, but you don't want to picture their stuff inside it, their cars in the driveway. It's not rude, it's just--awkward, I guess.
That being said, it's
also an unspoken rule of house-shopping that the current owner is supposed to
go the hell away while people are looking at their house. Preferably gone from the premises entirely, but finding some excuse to hang out in the back yard, at the very least.
It isn't directly rude, but it is an unspoken rule of house-shopping that you don't comment about the house in front of the current owner. Most people have this weird emotional connection to their house, like they want you to love it exactly the way it is, rather than the obvious reality that you're going to bring in your own furniture and all that. There's a possessiveness that is very hard to explain. You're selling it, but you don't want to picture their stuff inside it, their cars in the driveway. It's not rude, it's just--awkward, I guess.
That being said, it's also an unspoken rule of house-shopping that the current owner is supposed to go the hell away while people are looking at their house. Preferably gone from the premises entirely, but finding some excuse to hang out in the back yard, at the very least.
I do understand what you're saying, don't get me wrong. I still don't think it was reason enough to bitch me out.
The house is for sale by owner, no realtor to show us around, so the owner had to be there. So yes, a bit touchy to mention prospects for the house, but the woman herself is showing/selling. It comes along with the territory then, and I doubt she was actually bothered herself.
Plus my sis was initially pissed off that I told the seller, that she is the buyer. Was I supposed to pretend I or my mom was? Is that not crazy?
Oh I definitely don't think it was worthy of being bitched-out, MTP. The owner deserves what she gets if she's going to hover around while you're looking.
That said, tell your sister to be very wary of buying a house without her own realtor to represent her. The seller pays the realtor fees anyway, so there's absolutely no reason for her not to use one, and they can keep you from getting screwed in a lot of different ways.
If the house is "for sale by owner", I don't believe the seller will pay realtor fees.
Aden didn't put all the cats in their room last night, so one of them was wandering around meowing in the middle of the night.
One of the dogs decided to chew up one of Dazzas bait esky's (cooler box thingy. I don't know what you call them)
Max decided to be a shit when he woke for a feed at 5am.
I'm very tired and I've had enough.
That is all.
Hmmm, was this by chance a control issue with you sister?
If the house is "for sale by owner", I don't believe the seller will pay realtor fees.
Yeah, that's often true, unless they've been on the market forever and have started to realize that it's really hard to sell a home by yourself, and then they start getting desperate--really, there's basically no incentive for a buyer to buy a house that's for sale by owner. The house is usually overpriced too, because everyone wants to believe their home is worth more than it is, and it's the seller's realtor who is supposed to bring a dose of reality to the situation for them.
FSBOs (pronounced fizz-bos) suck. You get what you pay for.
Or they figure they can ask a lower price and still come out with the same in their pocket.
My best buddy just closed on her awesome new home on Friday. Great planner that she is, she took a class in real estate (which was free tuition as employee perk) as she started the process of house hunting so she would know what the heck was going on. She ended up getting it for her price.
Feet are covered in ant bites and, despite the anti-itch cream, I can't fall asleep. Grr!
A dude I have just met (noob at the lodge) in an inane attempt at gallantry, introduced me to his wife.
Verbatim:
"Marcie, I'd like you to meet the Sargent at Arms, Tony. Tony is also an EX MARINE."
Marcie: "Great to meet you, Tony. Sam and I will be getting drunk on Monday at a BBQ at our house. We'd love for you to join us. After all... Monday is YOUR SPECIAL DAY!. Hope to see you there."
I don't think so. What a pair of asshats.
It'd be a real shame if your REMF caught a right hook in the snotlocker.
Discipline, CG... discipline. ;)
Update. Had a really bad night last night. Mouth just got more and more painful. New sore spots springing up every where. Molar really starting to hurt and radiate into face and jaw. Tongue and back of throat also hurting.
Decided enough was enough and wasn't going to wait until doctors and dentists open up again after holiday weekend. Got up this moring, and phoned a taxi down to A&E. Wouldn't normally bother them with something like this, but the rate of progression was worrying me. I really didn;'t want it going into my jawbone or something hideous.
I have a very badly abcessed tooth, and this has triggered the infection in the rest of my mouth. So, am now on two different anti-biotics and ibuprofen, and under strict instruction to phone my dentist tomorrow and get them to see me this week.
Couldn't chew food again today. So, in order to fulfil the 'with food' instructions, I necked a bottle of chocolate milk. That seemed to be ok. Took the ibuprofen at same time. hakf an hour later was able to manage half a tin of macaroni cheese.
God Bless Heinz. The saviour of convalescents and dickheads who don't go to the dentist when they should.
My dentist told me long ago, not to take antibiotics with milk. Somehow keeps them from working properly. Don't remember what the particular antibiotic was but it was for an abscessed tooth. :confused:
Update. Had a really bad night last night. Mouth just got more and more painful. New sore spots springing up every where. Molar really starting to hurt and radiate into face and jaw. Tongue and back of throat also hurting.
Decided enough was enough and wasn't going to wait until doctors and dentists open up again after holiday weekend. Got up this moring, and phoned a taxi down to A&E. Wouldn't normally bother them with something like this, but the rate of progression was worrying me. I really didn;'t want it going into my jawbone or something hideous.
I have a very badly abcessed tooth, and this has triggered the infection in the rest of my mouth. So, am now on two different anti-biotics and ibuprofen, and under strict instruction to phone my dentist tomorrow and get them to see me this week.
Couldn't chew food again today. So, in order to fulfil the 'with food' instructions, I necked a bottle of chocolate milk. That seemed to be ok. Took the ibuprofen at same time. hakf an hour later was able to manage half a tin of macaroni cheese.
God Bless Heinz. The saviour of convalescents and dickheads who don't go to the dentist when they should.
I feel for you and feel for you having to do the macaroni and cheese trick.
I have been going through this the last week. The dentist wasn't able to pull it due to the pain of the infection. * drat * now which makes me freaked plus referred me to a surgeon due to it being close to my sinus cavity. * Then why did he try to pull it to begin with!* sigh- I am almost finished with the antibiotics and it still hurts to eat.
I think I will ask for Sodium Penathol because I don't think this simple pull will be so simple.
The last tooth I had pulled WAS so simple. This one hurts and in a strange your descriptions make me feel better. I thought the jaw pain was worriesome so I'm not as worried now. You know they say misery loves company.
Lastly, Nobody sign up for Willamette Dental. It's what I get for choosing the cheapest plan. I wait a whole month for someone 60 miles away to pull my tooth.
I loose my insurance altogether in 3 months.
My dentist told me long ago, not to take antibiotics with milk. Somehow keeps them from working properly.
Was just going to say the same thing--milk coats the intestines (just like it coats your tongue when you drink it) and prevents proper absorption of most drugs (and many food nutrients too, but that's a different thread.) But if you got some relief, enough must have gotten through. Just remember, back before antibiotics, an abscessed tooth was a common cause of death. Keep that sucker in check with the meds, Dana.
My dentist told me long ago, not to take antibiotics with milk. Somehow keeps them from working properly. Don't remember what the particular antibiotic was but it was for an abscessed tooth. :confused:
oh. Oh dear. *winces* Ill be careful on the next lot then. I daresay it won;t stop them working entirely though, so it won;t have been a complete waste. Still, no sense taking further chances. I'll just make sure I time them for a little after the painkillers in future. Once they've kicked in I can stand to eat a little.
@ Sky. Oww, honey that sounds awful. God that makes mine sound much less nightmarish, the whole dentist thing sounds like it was an ordeal. lol there ye go we both made each other feel better :P
[eta] googled advice and it doesn't seem to be a factor with these two anti-biotics. No conclusive answer though. Will still avoid if poss.
So you're not on track with the celery and apples, then, Dana?
[COLOR="White"][SIZE="1"][sorry][/SIZE][/COLOR]
Umm...not sure what the fuck was going on this week. After I seemed to be getting better (tuesday? somethinglike that, I lost track) and ate food without puking...few hours later: bang back again to the puking every hour or so, only able to take in liquids, no energy, no ability to watch anything, read anything, do anything. Just drifted in and out of a haze for days, feeling like shit. Gave up on the anti-biotics entirely, but was still ill.
God bless complan, diurilytes and Mum.
....did you go to the dentist?.................????....hmmmm????
Made an appointment *pleased with self*. Can't see me til Tuesday. Probably just as well. I'd have just yakked all over their surgery if I'd gone an sooner lol.
My dentist is a hell of a travel away. Worth it though. They specialise in dental phobic patients. Which is good, 'cause otherwise my teeth really would be falling out my head.
I am going crazy again. I can feel the muck inside my brain.
wish was dead. cannot go thru this again.
That's not muck, just you're dirty mind. ;)
Bri, you know and I know this is temporary.
You've been through the shit and survived it, and you won't be there forever.
Alcohol is a poison - okay in lower quatities and with amusing side effects, but not in the quantities we are capable of ingesting. But its effects don't last forever, just longer than the morning after that casual drinkers limp through.
You're walking wounded at the moment, going through hell. Dry out, get your medication sorted (seriously, they should have you on something that takes alcohol into account, like acamprosate - which I am still hoping to be offered)
I've taken myself off anti-depressants before. It's not a smart thing to do you know. I hope the new doctor works well with you. Be completely honest with him/ her.
Good luck darling.
I hope you can find yourself in all the chaos. I'm still here if you want to contact me. And I believe in you even if you can't believe in yourself at the moment. You've believed in me when I thought I had nothing to offer after all.
This too will end Bri. Here if you need a shoulder.
thanks, everyone. You are all very kind.
to add insult to injury, someone stole my account number and charged (fraudulently) 480.00 to my debit card, Via PAY PAL making me twice in the hole plus the 480...
sigh. I hope those fukers rot in hell.
Do your banks have a claims process where that money can be returned to your account after going through a dispute process? Most of the time when stuff like that happens here you don't end up having to be out of pocket, so I just wondered if they have a similar system in the US.
eta: I hope things get better for you soon. I'll try to keep out of your way. ;)
I miss my friend and wish I had spoke up when it could have made a difference.
Details intentionally left out. I just wanted to post this publicly.
Our good friend died yesterday from metastatic colon cancer. We will be escorting his body via a motorcade of over 50 motorcycles. I will be a pall barer. His BIL will ride his Harley. RIP friend.
Condolences Merc. Never easy burying a friend.
[eta] Oh, and classic: so sorry you're missing your friend. *hugs*
Same thing that finished my Mum off. It must have been a tough finish. I'm sorry for your loss Merc.
Back at you Ali.
Here is a guy that I was sharing a pint with not 12 weeks ago. If you are over 50 get your routine cancer screening done. Esp if you have a family history. The guy refused to have routine cancer screening colonoscopy. It killed him. Do your breast self exams, get your pap smears, do the right thing.
Mum was diagnosed and dead within 5 months. Doesn't take long. She'd already had a large tumor removed from her liver previously though, and had part of her bowel removed, so was getting checkups regularly.
Sometimes when your time's up, it's just up I think. :(
Made an appointment *pleased with self*. Can't see me til Tuesday. Probably just as well. I'd have just yakked all over their surgery if I'd gone an sooner lol.
My dentist is a hell of a travel away. Worth it though. They specialise in dental phobic patients. Which is good, 'cause otherwise my teeth really would be falling out my head.
I just got mine yanked today. I feel good now that it is gone and I too had to travel 60 miles away but getting the specialist WAS worth it. ahh nitrous and codine. I'm good.
I am going crazy again. I can feel the muck inside my brain.
wish was dead. cannot go thru this again.
I don't know how you feel about me so I am not going to say this because I am wanting brownie points. I just get a good sense about you. You have a beautiful inner self. I think anyone would agree. I know this doesn't take the bleak feeling away but perhaps when you are looking for something to hold onto please hold on to these people here you care about so much because I know they care about you in the same way.
I hope that came out ok in my vicodin befuddled mind.
Merc: I'm so sorry for your loss. It does run in my family; as soon as I hit 40, I'll probably bring it up with my GP. Let me just add, Fuck Cancer!
Bri: hang in there. :grouphug:
Sorry for your loss, Merc, and best wishes for your friend's family.
Made an appointment *pleased with self*. Can't see me til Tuesday. Probably just as well. I'd have just yakked all over their surgery if I'd gone an sooner lol.
My dentist is a hell of a travel away. Worth it though. They specialise in dental phobic patients. Which is good, 'cause otherwise my teeth really would be falling out my head.
So did you go?
umm....[SIZE="1"]no[/SIZE]
I arsed around in the morning getting ready and checking emails and so on...so was a little late leaving house. Got to bus stop in time to see my bus sailing away. Next one due in 30 mins.
I was standing there gradually wilting in the heat. yesterday was ridiculously hot. I seriously don't cope with heat and sun well. My body's ability to regulate temperature is completely fucked up and my eczema is currently very flared. I couldn't stand there for hal an hour in that heat so I went back home with a vague notion of going back out in half an hour. Trouble is that wuold still have left me sitting on buses for two hours during the hottest part of the day. I'd struggled with the heat the day before when I went into uni and am still sore from the flare it provoked. So...I ended up phoning the dentist and re arranging. Soonest they can fit me in is 1st week in July. I expressed concern about the recent dental abcess but she said if I ran into any trouble with it to phone and they can post me anti-biotics registered post to get to me the next day.
I was glad I made the decision not to go. I stayed in my cool house. When I eventually went out to walk the dog around 6pm (he'd had a morning walk before it got really hot) it was still too hot for me and I had a blinding headache by the time I got down the hill to Ma's. The bus journey at the height of the midday sun would have been a real problem I think. Even in my cool house, the heat rash was almost unbearable.
This wasn't dental phobia stopping me, because they werent going to do anything anyway. It was just to assess the treatment needed and arrange for the work to be done.
that's an awful lot of justification....... :eyebrow:
Yah. But it really was far too hot. The downside of being out in the sun for me is quite nasty. Even wearing visored hat (my leather flat cap) to shield my face and long sleeves to protect my arms. I was a mess when I got back from Leeds on Monday. And it was much hotter yesterday.
I think it may be time to dig out the electric fans.
And your rescheduled appointment is for . . . . when?
(Yeah, I know a slight bit about dental rationalization.)
umm....[SIZE="1"]no[/SIZE]
Soonest they can fit me in is 1st week in July. I expressed concern about the recent dental abcess but she said if I ran into any trouble with it to phone and they can post me anti-biotics registered post to get to me the next day.
umm....[SIZE="1"]no[/SIZE]
I expressed concern about the recent dental abcess but she said if I ran into any trouble with it to phone and they can post me anti-biotics registered post to get to me the next day.
please oh please for your own comfort sake get those antibiotics and get rid of the infection before they pull it. They would or should do this anyway.
I still had a bit of infection left and I learned the meaning of the line,'cruel to be kind'.
Oh, I had a course of antibiotics from the hospital. This was if it flared back up before I got to see them.
i just got back from my new psych and I am more depressed than ever.
he wants to put me on 1000mg of a medicine that makes you WANT TO EAT and is practically guaranteed to make you gain weight. SO, they weighed me to see my starting point. I weigh more now than I ever have IN MY LIFE. I'm NOT taking the drugs, I'm NOT going to any fucking group, and I'm NOT going back.
to say I loathe myself is an understatement. I cancelled my appt with my onco because, frankly, i don't give a shit if the cancer comes back, I'm NOT going to be VP for a student assoc. on campus (it's a fucking mess of an organization anyway) and I'm NOT going to see anybody today. Or tomorrow.
I'm just going to sit here and despise the fucking gross idiot asshole that I am.
Try to cut yourself some slack Bri. From where I'm sitting, there's nothing to loathe.
You know on an intellectual level that this is temporary, right? You're going to get through this.
:comfort:
Bri, I won't tell you to get up and go somewhere today. But try to give yourself SOMETHING to distract your mind. Music always worked for me. YMMV.
I'm not a psychiatrist, but there are at least a dozen antidepressants on the market these days, and it's hard to believe there isn't one that doesn't carry a weight gain side effect. If you told him about your weight gain concern and he ignored it, I say it's time for a new doctor. (Hopefully one that will not only take your weight concern into account, but also has experience dealing with psychological aftereffects of cancer.)
Bri, concentrate on the good? What are some good things in your life, right now? Like name three?
And Bri, let me (hopefully gently) urge you to reconsider the Onc appointment. You will feel better some day -- maybe not tomorrow, but someday soon. And then you don't want to be blind-sided by the big C again.
Sure, ditch the student assoc -- you don't owe them anything. But you do owe yourself proper medical care.
Please?
What they said Bri. Try to maybe find something in your life that you DO feel good about and immerse yourself in it for the time being.
And agreed about the Onc. We need you around here, so FUCK CANCER. Kick it's arse.
*hugs* Sorry you're feeling shit Bri. It'll pass. It must. The others' advice seems sound to me. There must be other options in terms of anti-depressants. But try to stay well whilst you ride this one out. You'll be glad of it when you get clear, which you will. Like every thing else this horrible feeling will just be a memory soon enough.
Hey Bri, maybe your onco can point you in the direction of a psych who will better understand where you're coming from? Please reschedule that appt for a day when you're more ready to kick ass -there's too much C going around as it is.
and when you're feeling more feisty...
Did you tell the psych that you weren't going to take the new drug? or did you lie and say you'd try it? because if the latter, call them and tell them actually, no I'm not going to take this, give me something that'll work for all aspects of my life, and if the former, dump him and get a new new psych
I'm going to call him and tell him NO WAY am I taking this drug at the weight I am at currently. I took myself off prozac about 2 months ago and I'm going to put myself back on it (started today) as I have some refills of it.
I won't go into all the details, but it's very difficult for me to exercise (I walk that terrier everyday and it KILLS my legs and back, but I do it) but my eating habits suck huge big macs and taco bells. I eat like shit. I know this. I have to change it.
this is my second 'new' psych doc in four months. the first new one put me on abilify which costs 500.00/month (which my ins. co.won't cover) and when I called to tell them I needed something else they said, "It'll take six weeks for you to get an appointment" so WTF? I had just seen him, he just needed to write a new, cheaper script!
This new guy is nice and seems to care, but...ain't no way I"m taking depakote 1000mg and gain 40 more pounds. Frankly, I'd rather have a cross town bus hit me than gain one more ounce. I will tell them that. They can do whatever they want with that info.
I'm finding it hard to care about anything at all. I don't care if I do my paper, I don't care if I take a shower, I don't care if I die.
gee, maybe in six weeks, after the prozac starts to kick in, I'll give a shit. This feeling is like zombiefication. I cannot wait to see what my othello paper looks like. Hilarious, I'm sure.
oh, and someone I kinda depended on has just given me the bums rush. everything , EVERYTHING is over. so many undeserving, happy people die...and here I am. Life is a joke.
I'm finding it hard to care about anything at all.
Not a problem. We'll do the caring for you till you are up to it.
Its perfectly reasonable and understandable to me that you can get tired fighting all the fights you've been fighting. That's why they have 'rounds' in boxing - you can't keep that up for 12 rounds without a break.
Your human - your tired. It makes sense. Hang out with us for a bit till you get your wind back. We can worry about what to do after that after then.
What Beestie said.
Hang in there Bri...you will get through this. Or I'll get mad. ;)
Bri.... my advice (free, worth every penny, etc.) is that you try very hard not to blow off the paper. Even if you feel it'll be a half-assed effort, it's better than nothing. Because, if you do blow it off, you're sacrificing at least in part your efforts for all the rest of the semester up till now.
Or, better yet, you might consider getting your psych to endorse an incomplete and/or extension for you on medical grounds.
Now, I may be wrong, but I'm guessing you're getting ready to spit nails at the very suggestion. I know you take your studies seriously, and I can tell your self-identity as a good student, not just one that shows up and slides by, is very important to you. But dammit, there are limits. If it's feasible, you'll be more satisfied in the long run if you can finish off your work in a way that doesn't compromise your expectations of yourself, rather than doing it under what looks to me like pretty severe duress. (Besides, I guarantee you legions of "spolied little bitches" have gotten those extensions with far, far less justification than you have.)
Very good thought on the extension. Worth looking into.
Or, you might get a kick out of writing a paper that is so way out there that the prof is moved to give you a grade of "A...W T F?!" You could begin a new grading system.
phlegm is upsetting me today. that and procrastination. the web would be a much better place if i just just get my ass in gear and actually do the stuff I need to get done instead of sharing my thoughts with cyberspace.
So, basically, anything that starts with the letter 'P'?
Oh noes, who is sponsoring Sesame Street today? :eek:
I'll have a P please, Bob.
payroll is the thing i'm procrastinating about, as it happens.
Oh PUH-leeze! Pay the pauper people, ya penny-pinchin' piece of puh, puh, puh...(ran out of p words.)
I'll have a P please, Bob.
*Dad voice* You should have thought of that before you left the house.
I'll have an E please Bob *cheeky grin*
Eezer Goode, Eezer Goode, He's Ebenezer Goode
has anybody got any Veras?
hahahaha ohmi happy days. Chemically happy, but hey happy's happy right?
Kinda pisses me off that right now..in this moment.. I don't really have anything that upsets me. Imagine that.
And by the way.... I'll have an O, Bob. A big O.
Update on post 4020. Still stressing. I have an opportunity that I'm pursuing even though it has me twisted.
I have the ability to sell my practice to an associate. The company name and all assets save for a handful of accounts go with the sale. With the proceeds I can be debt free except for house and one car. That's the same as before except I've been contacted by a friend at my old firm. One of their bigger producers in the area left and they need an experienced guy with my particular skill set to go in and save the office... right now. I would be selling my existing practice and taking only a few of my clients over to my old company AND I'd receive an incentive package and a whole new practice from my old firm.
It screams win win win all the way around, but it still has my stomach in knots.
As you know, in your business, no one ever got ahead without taking risk. Of course you have people doing that around you all the time and maybe it is your job to help them do it, so you may not be so good at it yourself. (assumption)
I say go for it. Sell the practice, take the new job, pay off the debts, and start with a clean slate. Few ever have that opportunity. Worst case is you will have to start again. But you have done that once and when you did it before you probably had more debt. This time you will have little. Nothing good in life comes easy. Good luck. Let us know what you do.
Not upsetting so much as occasionally popping into my head: my graduation ceremony is next month. I so wanted to graduate whilst Dad was still here to see it. He'd have loved it, I know. I made him wait an awfully long time to be proud of me. After the troubled years of teens and twenties. I really wanted him to see it.
I'm sure he was proud of you every step of the way, Dana.
A former co-worker committed suicide this morning at a local park.
He had been arrested for embezzling from my employer last fall. I feel badly for his wife and three children, his son and my son were friends as they both worked as temps/interns for my employer.
Why do people choose this route to 'solve' their problems?
Why do people choose this route to 'solve' their problems?
This is not a dig on your friend. But a number of my kids friends have committed suicide. I have always told them that it is a cowards way out of ones problems unless you are terminally ill. I hold that opinion to this day.
Well if you told them before they killed themselves, it wasn't convincing, and if you told them after, they weren't listening.
Sometimes people just don't see a way through. Also, depression can do funny things to your thinking. A lot of people who attempt/commit suicide believe that they are releiving their loved ones of a burden.
I don't think it's a cowards way out. It's a very scary thing to try and take your own life. The moment of truth takes a kind of courage. Misguided and tragic, but a kind of courage nonetheless.
Not upsetting so much as occasionally popping into my head: my graduation ceremony is next month. I so wanted to graduate whilst Dad was still here to see it. He'd have loved it, I know. I made him wait an awfully long time to be proud of me. After the troubled years of teens and twenties. I really wanted him to see it.
Dana, I'm sure your dad was proud of you every step of the way. I found myself suddenly crying the other day, when it hit me that my grandmother would've loved to see me graduate last month. Though she wasn't around to see the culmination of all my hard work, she saw the path I was on and I bet she was happy to see where I was headed. I imagine your dad felt similarly, though that knowledge doesn't quite remove the sting of his absence.
ETA: Missed Shawnee's response because I wanted to reply too quickly. Oops! Sentiment remains the same although the words have already been said. (Great minds, eh?)
*smiles* thanks. I am so glad he got to see me win the second year history prize. That helps. And I bet your Gran was really proud of where you were headed, chika.
Well if you told them before they killed themselves, it wasn't convincing, and if you told them after, they weren't listening.
Dang kids these days...
For the second night in a row, my seemingly simple veggie side has come out completely inedible. I had backups, S.O.P. when trying new recipes, so no one went hungry, but still. Failure irritates the crap out of me.
Ach. That's frustrating Clod. A new day a new meal eh?
Missed this thread.
Hey Dana - I think he was there, you just couldn't see him. He is proud of you, you just can't hear him tell you. Just my :2cents: (cuz that's what I believe about my daddy)
*smiles* that's lovely Queenie. Thankyou.
or he was too busy shootin the sh*t over a cup of tea with my dad to even notice. take your pick.
hahahaha make that a shot of single malt and a conversation about gardening that'd be about right.
ooooohhhhhh....
she said "single malt".
I'll say it again in soft northern burr if you like?
What's the point of a burr if it's soft?
Go for it.
Not upsetting so much as occasionally popping into my head: my graduation ceremony is next month. I so wanted to graduate whilst Dad was still here to see it. He'd have loved it, I know. I made him wait an awfully long time to be proud of me. After the troubled years of teens and twenties. I really wanted him to see it.
Ditto what everyone else has said, Dana. I'm sure he's with you in spirit.
I imagine my parents are watching too, somehow, and I hope they're not too mad about the B I got last quarter. ;)
Dani, you know how I feel about the afterlife.
So I can't say he's watching you.
All I can say is if it comforts you to think of any element of your Dad being projected, it has found its place in your graduation.
I believe every child brings themself up to some extent. But they are also very much a product of their genes and parental influence. You deserve full approbation for this qualification - jeez hon, you're not a 20 year old scraping through with a third in business studies - but you also validate your Dad in doing so.
Talking of parents. Sigh.
Had a nasty surprise this morning.
Mum had asked a friend of hers to sign my new passport documents.
I'm pushed to find someone who has known me for more than 2 years in a position of trust in the community.
It can't be any professional of my accquaintance here - too soon.
And the majority of people who've known me since childhood don't have suitable standing.
Mum's friend D refused.
According to her, my plan (hope, actually) to go to Amsterdam is proof I am not depressed.
If I was, I would not be able to make future plans.
Ditto me colouring my hair, because I only do it to draw attention to myself, and people with depression do not do that.
Ditto me losing weight, trying to get out and exercise every day, going to my OT pottery class.
On the flip side of everything I am fighting to do proving I am not depressed, I am apparently manipulating my Mum, every Health Care Professional that has seen me and the system.
I need to be re-evaluated, despite the fact I got my DLA assessment through this week - the same week Mum spoke to D.
Mum is far too soft on me and I am lying to her and taking advantage of her. If she laid down the law she would find the situation very different.
I only want to go to Amsterdam for drugs, drink and (I've no idea how this works) to get involved in prostitution. Oh, and how does she know? She was a qualified psychiatric nurse back in the early 80s. She quit because her son was in trouble with the Police and they indicated to her that this was because she was a working Mum. Turns out he was (and still is, obviously) schizophrenic. And she has not met me since I've been back here - she's had one 5 minute conversation with me by phone.
I'm really upset about all this.
Not least because my Mum saw fit to tell me, in the detail written above.
WHY?
Why spew out the hurtful things that a woman who believes roll-ons give you breast cancer?
Why tell your daughter who is trying and working hard to get back to a productive life that she is therefore denying she ever really had a problem?
Why not say to the damned woman with her ugly haircut that she should shut her cakehole and stop talking about things she doesn't understand?
I suspect because Mum wants to believe her.
I suspect because Mum has been dripping poison in her ear suggesting exactly the same thing - that if I can colour my hair why don't I have a job yet.
I suspect because Mum really wants me out and would love to practice some tough love - tough love being her parenting method of choice in most cases.
Once again, please do not think I don't fully appreciate what my parents have done for me.
They did not have to take me in.
I can understand why they would be aggrieved to do so at this late stage in their lives.
They do love me - yes I do know that.
But I'm hurt, upset and angry.
And for the record, I went into town today to make sure I had a card for my brother-in-law's birthday (on TUESDAY) because Mum was getting twitchy that I was making some sort of stand by not buying one. I guess that means I'm not depressed either.
Jesus, your mum's friend sounds like a total bitch.
Do not let this get to you honey. You dont have to prove your state of mind to this woman. You don't even need to prove it to your mum (shouldnt have to, but sometimes parents find it easier to think you're faking it than actually having mental health issues: bear in mind that for your mum, accepting that you're depressed may include an element of guilt and that may be something she doesnt want to deal with). You know you're dealing with depression. You know this is bullshit. We know this bullshit. Deep down, i suspect your mum probably knows this is bull shit.
*shakes head* oh honey. It's shit though. I know it is. Life's hard enough without having that piled onto your shoulders. Keep doing what you're doing, because you know what makes you feel better and more able to cope day to day. You're the only one who does.
Did you tell your mum her friend is talking shite btw?
Are you taking the P?
Reminds me of code talking when little kids are in the room. :p
To SG.
What an incredibly hurtful thing. My heart wrenches over your words. I am so sorry this is happening. I wish there was someway I could make it better.
Sg - that woman, D, has a wad of shite stuck between her ears the size of Manhattan. Ugh, I can just imagine how this made you feel. Ok, you're not suicidal - that doesn't mean you're not depressed for crissakes OR in need of services. FWIW, nurses can be incredibly bitter people. Esp. psych nurses. I worked with them and knew I could very well become one of them and had to quit for my own sanity and well-being.
I do know how this feels, though. My mother went over to my neighbor's (the assbitch who put a camera on my house a while back) and got an earful of what a total bitch I am and how horrid, etc, etc, and my mother not only listened to this tripe she came back over to MY house to tell me what the dumb bitch had said about me. I told her I could NOT believe she'd listened to that spite and then come over to tell me, word for word, what the crazy fucking bitch had said (Me and crazy bitch have a looooong history. I won't go into it here). My father, who NEVER sticks up for me, ever, looked at my mom and said, "J, you have a big mouth," which shut her up.
When my mom does this sort of stupid fucking thing now I look at her and say,"have you had a stroke?"
just awful. It's really hard to believe our mothers would be this way, listen to this shit...and then repeat it for our benefit.
D is a fucking twit who is probably on more medication than you or I.
Can you tell your mum how hurt you are over this or is it best to leave it?
If I'd win the lotto, Cherry, things would be different in a lot of places.
:hugs:
Sleeping on it helped.
And Mum is being really nice to me - she knows how much it hurt.
I now suspect that she was hurt herself, and chose the wrong person to share it with. She probably worried that if she told anyone else, they might believe D's side of the story.
Anyway, today she has offered me a cup of tea, asked if there was anything I wanted or needed in town and has just shouted up to let me know she's put some bagels in the freezer and I'm to help myself.
I am a little withdrawn. It's my way of dealing with hurt. But I'm not sulking and I'm not trying to punish her. I think she was wrong in telling me, but I don't think it was malicious - that's the hurt talking.
So I'm going out for a walk after lunch, and I will invite her along.
She probably won't come (I kinda hope not, she slows me down!) but at least she will know I'm trying to behave normally.
That's brilliant Sundae. I'm really pleased and relieved to hear this.
You don't know anyone that could sign the papers and your Mum tried to help by getting the one person she's that could, to sign them. OK, that's a good thing.
But the woman refused, so the only way your mum could let you know she was trying to help, trying to do a good thing, was to tell you she refused.
But telling you that, might have caused you to ask the woman why and your Mum knowing what the woman would say, decided it would be better hearing it from her.
How am I doing so far?
Now, you have three "I suspects" in there that are really damning to/on/of your Mum. "Suspects" sounds to me like you'll trying to create a, in your mind, plausible scenario to explain what happened. You could be 100% correct, but keep in mind "suspects" don't make it so, only possible.
While they might be "aggrieved", they could be just worried. You don't get aggrieved when the cat pukes on your clean sheets (well, maybe a little :)) but you certainly get worried.
My possible scenario may be way out in left field, but without knowing for sure, it's possible. ;)
If you want to post it to me, I may be able to sign it for you. As long as we both do recorded delivery. I think a ward councillor might count even though I am not a professional. Worth checking out anyway.
And if when you;ve checked it turns out I can, then I promise promise promise not to be shit on posting it back.
[eta] Ach damn. Cancel that offer. I think it has to be someone who holds a current passport. I don't so, that's me out.
so far, nuthin'.
Why? what's upsetting you?
no-one is coming to my yard sale and it's about to rain on me :(
Awwww, monster...whatcha got? I need a small square coffee table.
Why does chloe have to get so fucking pissed and moody every single damn time i do a SINGLE thing that doesnt involve her? even when shes invited and ive been planning it for weeks? even when i fucking spent the night at her house the night before? why does she have to be a part of EVERYTHING I EVER DO? why is everything in the world my fault? and why am i so drunk/where did all my money go? fml man.
Because she's young. ;)
Dude, are you still partying for graduation?
... the woman refused, so the only way your mum could let you know she was trying to help, trying to do a good thing, was to tell you she refused.
But telling you that, might have caused you to ask the woman why and your Mum knowing what the woman would say, decided it would be better hearing it from her.
Mum could quite easily have backed off telling me the why is so much detail. In fact she could just have said D doesn't let any of her family sign passports and left it at that. Or she could have left it at the fact that D thinks my reasons for going to Amsterdam are suspect. She really didn't have to go into the fact that D thinks I am faking depression and drag things like my hair colour and weight loss into it.
I backed off on the accusations I made, because as I said it was the hurt talking.
However I do get every day a comment about my hair. Or her wishing she could get me a volunteer job. Or asking whether I have heard from the council re housing. So I made unfair assumptions, but it didn't come completely out of left field.
Also this isn't a one-off. Throughout my life, Mum has seen fit to tell me negative things people said about me. Or add a negative spin to positive things. I know it's her brand of tough love, her way of keeping me in line so I have an easier life. But all it does is knock me back, affect my self esteem and upset me.
Which makes it harder to deal with rather than easier.
But as I'm an adult now I can express myself and vent my anger and hopefully bounce back quicker. That's why I appreciate this place so much.
If you want to post it to me, I may be able to sign it for you.
I've checked the details and you can sign for me! Yay! Thanks hon.
I have to get the money together still - I'm in very early planning stage at present. But it helps to know there is another option.
Sure, you're obviously in the thick of it, and privy to much more than the snippets we hear. I just wanted to caution you not to assume nastiness that could possibly be explained by stupidity. ;)
I have to keep reminding myself, my mother grew up in a whole different world, shaped by my grandparents who might as well grown up on another planet.
Why does chloe have to get so fucking pissed and moody every single damn time i do a SINGLE thing that doesnt involve her? even when shes invited and ive been planning it for weeks? even when i fucking spent the night at her house the night before? why does she have to be a part of EVERYTHING I EVER DO? why is everything in the world my fault? and why am i so drunk/where did all my money go? fml man.
Well, part of it is you're just getting older and finding out more of what has some of us geezers so jaded. :)
But, some people are just like this. When they're "in a relationship" (in whatever terms) they expect to do everything with their partner and vice versa. Depending on how cynical one is, one might think that she doesn't trust you and is trying to control/manipulate you and keep her eye on you at all times;
or one might think that she genuinely is so infatuated with you that she can't imagine WANTING to go do something without you... and if you want to go off without her, that means you must hate her or something.
(I'm deliberately not telling you what to actually do about it because, well, I don't have a clue. My solution was to a) not realize it was happening, then b) pretend it wasn't happening, and then finally c) to have it brought to such a ridiculous public confrontation that the only sensible thing for me to do was--literally--walk away.)
Well what a poopy yard sale. I had the most stuff ever, the best organized ever and hardly anyone came. It didn't even rain much after 9, but it was overcast and threatening all day. Last week was beautiful, but i was busy -the woman across the road had a sale and hardly had anything with clothes dumped in tubs and loads of punters came by. I did take $100 from dribs and drabs -I think the most expensive thing I sold was a kid's bike for $7. I did get rid of two worn out umbrella strollers with raincovers and a parasol that were taing up space. For $3 total. Ah well. We're contemplating leaving it virtually set up in the garage so i can drag it out one afternoon if the conditions are good, and going all American -leaving the cars on the drive and the crap in the garage :lol:
Why does chloe have to get so fucking pissed and moody every single damn time i do a SINGLE thing that doesnt involve her? even when shes invited and ive been planning it for weeks? even when i fucking spent the night at her house the night before? why does she have to be a part of EVERYTHING I EVER DO? why is everything in the world my fault? and why am i so drunk/where did all my money go? fml man.
Welcome to adulthood...
That blows monster. Did you advertise at all?
With signs outside and at the entrance to the neighbothood the day before and during. Usually sufficient.
Why does chloe have to get so fucking pissed and moody every single damn time i do a SINGLE thing that doesnt involve her? even when shes invited and ive been planning it for weeks? even when i fucking spent the night at her house the night before? why does she have to be a part of EVERYTHING I EVER DO? why is everything in the world my fault? and why am i so drunk/where did all my money go? fml man.
Ahem.
"And so the young man passes out of his original nature, which was trained in the school of necessity, into the freedom and libertinism of useless and unnecessary pleasures."
-Plato's Republic, Book VIII
Oh and what Crimson Ghost said.
They're all crazy. Some are clingy-needy crazy and some are nasty-mean crazy. Take your pick. Or call Sheldon.
Grrrr...teach your children well. Not all women are needy. Ibby, she's just young and hasn't realized how annoying it is. Explain it to her. Nicely.
Sure, you're obviously in the thick of it, and privy to much more than the snippets we hear. I just wanted to caution you not to assume nastiness that could possibly be explained by stupidity. ;)
I have to keep reminding myself, my mother grew up in a whole different world, shaped by my grandparents who might as well grown up on another planet.
You're right of course. And it does help to question myself over highly emotional reactions.
And yes, Mum is very much a product of her times, her parents and her class. Class is still very important to Mum, and I think I shock her on a regular basis without ever intending to. So it looks like I'm making a statement, when in fact I'm trying to be myself.
Ahem.
Oh and what Crimson Ghost said.
They're all crazy. Some are clingy-needy crazy and some are nasty-mean crazy. Take your pick. Or call Sheldon.
What about quirky cute crazy? you crazy-ist you.
You're right of course. And it does help to question myself over highly emotional reactions.
And yes, Mum is very much a product of her times, her parents and her class. Class is still very important to Mum, and I think I shock her on a regular basis without ever intending to. So it looks like I'm making a statement, when in fact I'm trying to be myself.
I'd probably turn her hair blue :P
sober now
problems okay again for now
shes not the only clingy one either
cause im almost as bad as her sometimes
...maybe not quite as often but
mneh.
i'm really just worried about her next year when i go off to college...
What are her plans, Ib? She's got another year where you are now, or she's going somewhere else?
...and my heart just broke
hahahaha make that a shot of single malt and a conversation about gardening that'd be about right.
Oh, wow! That really would be the case wih my dad!
...and my heart just broke
Aaawww! What's wrong MTP?
Friend bein playfully-mean. I'm not in the mood today I guess.
Totally understand. I came in this morning to the joy of fixing someone elses screw up from Friday - do not mess with me. I will bite.
Yep, had quite a few of those too...actually thats kinda my job. Hmm...
Fixing other tech's screw ups (which there are plenty) really pisses me off.
I think we both need ice cream
or booze
No...ice cream and booze.
Vanilla w/ Kahlua? Chocolate w/ Grand Marnier? I'll meet you in Arizona in five hours?
My Monday was brightened by the discovery that a couple of our folks got their email accounts phished. As a result our mail server spewed a ton fo spam over the weekend and we got on a couple blacklists. Hurl.
Dickheads who want to hold meetings about every tiny thing that needs doing, while at the same time claiming it's not their job or mine so person C should be doing it .....until it's too late to get the required stuff done.
Fortunately i just went ahead and did it anyway without "permission" :lol:
Hell people, it's a backstroke swim meet, maybe we need to have some backstroke flags? so the swimmers don't hit the wall? Hmmm? Finding out how they went missing is not going to make their replacement any faster or alter the fact that they need replacing. before the meet. On Thursday. :smack:
:banghead:
Cancelling thousands of dollars in loans for a previous year (therefore, not my error) which I tried to save by contacting the students. There is no going back: it's done, finito, fini...dilly ding dang done.
But, I bet they get the letter telling them they owe the institution money, even though numerous contact attempts to get a new promissory note went unanswered.
I was able to save a few of them who responded. :(
ya did what you could do - its still their responsibility.
Oh that's shit Shawnee. It's not your fault, but I bet it still feels awful :(
I know, and, but, it sucks ass...what a shock to have come along? Every key stroke I'm thinking "awwww, fuck." The bad news part of my job is the suckiest, and something I still haven't gotten used to.
*shakes head* not a pleasant task by any measure.
I know, and, but, it sucks ass...what a shock to have come along? Every key stroke I'm thinking "awwww, fuck." The bad news part of my job is the suckiest, and something I still haven't gotten used to.
Hang in there hon. :comfort:
Awww, thanks guys. :o
I still haven't finished that project as another project's priority suddenly grew and took on a life of its own. Never boring!
I'm so upset I'm eating a massive piece of chocolate cake with cream on it as I type this.
First of all, my MIL is a cow. I just have to say that, and soon you'll know why.
My brother as you may or may not know is a chiropractor. He specialises in rehab therapy and also does a lot of work with kids with various physical disabilities. That's just background so you'll understand why I take his word seriously. He and his wife baby sat for us last weekend for a few hours, and when we went to pick Max up, Don (brother) said that he's got some issues with his breathing which is possibly caused by (some long words) the brain not sending the right messages to his body. So anyway, today I went to his clinic where he works and he brought in one of his associates and they did a thorough work over on Max (who I might add took it all very well). Anyway, there's no definite diagnosis of course at this stage, but there are some therapies I need to do with Max in the short term, and then Don has recommended that if they don't make a significant difference over the next few months, he'll need to see a paediatric neurologist which leads me to the next part that's upsetting me.
Did you know that there is currently research being conducted about the flat spot lots of babies get on the backs of their heads because they're always laid on their backs? Apparently it's being linked to behavioural problems and a number of other physical issues. I have yet to look at the research, but I fully intend to do so. It makes a lot of sense. Apparently the flattening (it is suggested) causes some parts of the brain to 'malfunction'. So anyway, it has been suggested that Max spend a lot of his play time on his belly, and to get one of those sleeping things which keeps them on their side.
So basically, I'm going to be positive about all these things and do the therapies and see how we go. Just for now though, I'm upset about it all. I need time to process it.
Oh...about MIL. I told her about it all and she basically said I was an idiot.
Fuck her.
Oh and here's another thing. I was supposed to be going to my aunt's place for lunch on friday but I can't now because someone her son works with has whooping cough, so they've all been told to quaranteen themselves till further notice.
I'm not going to even say what I think about that!
Actually, this could also go in the what's pissing you off thread.
Our yard is infested with chiggers, which I forgot. So now I'm infested with chiggers.
:(
Our front porch, all along where the roof meets the wall (roof-line?) is infested with fire ants and 2 nests of yellow jackets. Which I have to try to spray pesticide on, while trying to keep from getting bit, or getting pesticide on myself, or breath it in. There will be a few spider causalities as well, I like spiders, but it can't be helped.
Friend died. Had a brain tumor which was found in late January. Malignant and inoperable.
He decides he can't take it and euthanizes himself with a mega dose of pain medication. I can't blame him, but his family is really upset. Left behind three kids. He was only 40 years old. May he rest in peace.
So sorry to hear that. Thoughts and prayers to the family.
So sorry, cap'n. A loss from suicide is so very hard to bear.
my pyscho neighbour accusing me of setting fire to her garbage bin...what she doesn't realise is I was sitting on the step having a smoke...busted her lighting it up herself...boy i wish i'd had a camera...now she's even more pyscho...why do i always end up with pyscho neighbours..hmmm:eek:
Friend died. Had a brain tumor which was found in late January. Malignant and inoperable.
He decides he can't take it and euthanizes himself with a mega dose of pain medication. I can't blame him, but his family is really upset. Left behind three kids. He was only 40 years old. May he rest in peace.
Sorry man. I hope he didn't mess up his families life insurance. I'm watching my Dad's mind go in slow motion, neither way looks very attractive.
The insurance settlement is pending as of now, but his Sister told me yesterday that it was likely that the family would still recieve the benefits due to dementia. We're sure he knew what he was doing, because, even though he was really depressed he was still able to think clearly. Hopefully the insurance execs don't know that.
I had a BIL who drank a snoot full of vodka and took a couple handfulls of nerve pills on a Christmas day. They were getting divorced and he was truly depressed. It resulted in his death. The autopsy says he had choked to death on his own vomit. The insurance company paid the full benefit. I know he killed himself, but obviously they didn't.
Thanks for your thoughts, my friends. Funeral is today. I will sing. Not really looking forward to it. At least it's not a military burial.
Cap'n, I'm sure the insurance company knew, they just paid anyway.
:hug: for you and his family. wish we were there to hear you sing - I'm sure he'll appreciate it from where he's sitting.
Capn, how awful. So sorry. *hugs* It's always hard to lose a friend. Must be horrendous for the family. To think you still have time for goodbyes and then this. Musthave been a tough decision for him to make.
@ Moonfreckle: well, honey, someone has to be next to the psycho:P I seem to recall Bri having a similar problem with a psycho neighbour from hell.
Ali - ignore the MIL. She sounds about as receptive to new ideas as my Mum and her ilk.
You'll know in time whether there is good research behind that idea, and in the mean time you are not suggesting anything radical as a counter-measure.
Cap'n I'm sorry. Hard to deal with when someone takes themself off without warning, and I get that you feel for his family.
Moonfreckle - argh!
Crazy witch. Hope she hurts herself next time.
Dennis is scratching his own throat up for some reason... he's all raw and bloody. Vet can't see him till 5.
Awww. Poor little bugger. Hope he feels better soon.
Ali - ignore the MIL. She sounds about as receptive to new ideas as my Mum and her ilk.
You'll know in time whether there is good research behind that idea, and in the mean time you are not suggesting anything radical as a counter-measure.
MIL is a right royal cow, but I hold all the power. If I don't take Max over to see her, she wont see him. I'm in no rush to hurry back at this stage, and it's not because I'm being vindictive. I just need to get my head together before I bother going again or else I might say something I'll regret later. In the mean time, I'll just keep telling Daryl what a cow she is, and he'll keep agreeing and telling me not to bother going back in a hurry.
I've emailed a couple of experts in the area and they've suggested that there's nothing firm out there just at the moment, and that I shouldn't worry too much at this stage. In the mean time I'll just wait for his 'head holders' to show up and see how they help.
Thanks for your thoughts SG. :)
Capn, I'm sorry about your friend. Sometimes the medical profession can be very compassionate about declaring a cause of death in cases where it's quite clear the deceased had a hand in it themselves. I hope all goes as hoped for the family. At least they'll have something to finalise his estate with then.
Moonfreckle...all I can say is, I feel your pain. ;)
Cap'n, I'm sure the insurance company knew, they just paid anyway.
With the life insurance Jim got recently, he' allowed to kill himself after either 3 or 5 years (I forget). Apparently it isn't always an automatic disqualification, like on TV...
I find it somewhat disturbing that you have this information ready to hand...
How long until you can kill him?
It's nice to know how much your husband is worth alive or dead at all times. ;)
Anytime now.
LOL (yes, actually!)
True friends will never desert you. Just an aside...carry on.
I just got something in the mail that really upsets me.
When my mom died, I inherited some stuff from her. Minivan, condo, and two seriously ugly-ass building lots in Cape Coral, Florida. I know they are ugly. I've seen them. I guess some people would like them, but they're awful, tiny, weedy, sandy things across the street from a man-made canal. I don't know why my parents bought them - investment of course, and perhaps at one time they intended to build and live there. Tell you what, it was one of those deals where you get a free couple nights in a hotel if you see a sales pitch, and these are not the actual lots they bought; there was a whole big scandal about it back in the 70s. I don't know what they're worth; not as much as they used to be worth now that the housing market in FL stinks. She used to get offers in the mail for $40K or more, but now they've stopped. So I figured I'd hang on to them for a while hoping the market would improve - don't even know if anyone would buy them now.
Now, the mail. The city of Cape Coral has decided to run water lines and of course us lucky lot owners have to pay for it. It's about $5,000 if I pay before Oct. 23. After that, it'll be $17,000.
I dunno about you, but I sure don't have an extra $5K laying around. Heck, I'm not even sure how I'm gonna come up with the $1K in taxes for the condo due at the end of July.
So I thought - well, this would be a good time to at least put the lots on the market and see what happens. But I can't even do that 'cause they've not been probated yet; they are not in my name. I have to pay MORE money to a FL attorney to get to where I could even sell the lots if I wanted to. No idea what that would cost. I guess I ought to find out.
This is just one of my periodical FREAKOUTS about money. I do this every now and then.
Did I mention that we just bought a water softener and a new air conditioner? And hubby wants to buy a new travel trailer plus of course a tow vehicle for it? OK, I kind of want one too -- we love "camping" and the kids aren't gettin' any younger y'know. (It's not really camping if you have a/c, a queen-size bed and a microwave, is it? :))
I'm the one that makes sure all the bills get paid on time. It's not exactly a low-stress job these days.
So offer a coulpe free nights in the camper to whoever buys the lots.......
Juniper, I think you will be surprised to find out those little lots are worth a hell of a lot more than you think, even in this depressed market. You need to have them appraised. If you can sell them off you could probably buy all those things you want.
Not upset per se, more like melancholy.
I really miss the people at my old job. They were so much fun. We used to laugh and laugh, sometimes so hard we cried.
Here and now, erm...not so much.
Hmmm, blue, I feel your pain. Mine isn't about the cow orkers so much, though of course I had forded some deeper relationships at my old job. We laugh here. I just miss feeling like I was in charge of my job and I owned my job and if good things happened it was my doing and if bad things happened it was my fault.
Here, sometimes, I feel like I'm just starting out at the MaCDonalDs.
Yah, I know what you mean--things are just kind of happening, and you have no control or over them, or much input into the process. It can be very unsettling.
Juni - you could easily borrow the money using the lots as collateral. As Merc advises, get an appraisal (which will happen anyway if you take out a loan against them).
Call a real estate attorney in the area and get some advice about the water assessment. I didn't know you could assess utility infrastructure costs against land owners unless it was in an association. Something seems funny about that. Especially the $5k now or $17k later. Honestly, it sounds like a scam.
Quite common for the local town/county government (or one of their insidious "authorities") to decide you need water, sewer or sidewalks, and you have to foot the bill. It's common for it to be cheaper for those required to pony up the money now, as opposed to those that join in later, or make them wait until the property is sold and the lean satisfied.
Phone and internet still out at the dar household. grumble grumble
My boy is wounded.
I'm not worried about it marring his beauty - he's not a showcat and I'd love him one-eyed and battleworn.
But it's the first time he's been hurt.
And (to a tiny, weeny degree) I feel like a parent whose child takes the skin off their knee while cycling or skating. I'm hurt that he's hurt and I grieve that he will always know that the world is painful from now on.
Stop smirking behind your hands, you owners of cat-brawlers.
It might look like strawberry jam in the photo, but this is a significant gouge for the tiny Diz cat. It wouldn't have taken much more for it to come through the other side - you can see right through it.
I don't know if it's another cat or if the boy squeezed into too small a space and did a coyote. All I know is he is NOT going out of my sight outside again. Nope, no way. He's just not bred to be robust enough for it.
I'm bathing it in salt water. And pretending to lick it clean while doing so (making licky noises by his ear as I swipe it). Well it works when cleaning his ear with a pokey stick, now Dylan of blessed memory is not here to do it for him.
Tell him ....
"Suck it up ya Nancy!"
I have a few outdoor cats and they strut around a lot like they are the kings of the neighborhood. Occasionally one of them will get a whooping and come back with a good gouge or three. They tend to stick close to the house for a bit, heal up, and then get back to their routine.
He'll be just fine catmom - just don't embarrass him in front of the other cats.
An A/C unit at the lodge had a compressor go out. Today's estimate was 5,200 bucks. Fuck.
Some SHIT STICK stole my brand new gas grill last nite. I only used it 3 fucking times. SHIT!!!!!!!
Ugghh!!! That totally sucks Fargon. sorry to hear that.
Where was it? How? When?? Were you away?
An A/C unit at the lodge had a compressor go out. Today's estimate was 5,200 bucks. Fuck.
Ugggg... that just happened at our house a few weeks ago. We opted for the replacement AC at about $2500. And then after install they find another problem for the internal bit (up in the attic) another cool $2500. That hurt the bank account a bit.
Some SHIT STICK stole my brand new gas grill last nite. I only used it 3 fucking times. SHIT!!!!!!!
I hate that happened to you. Thieves piss me off.
Keep your eye out, Fargon, they might be local and just using it for themselves. That sucks so badly. Gits. May their genitals get trapped in the grill just as it reaches temperature and their ice maker be out of order. And may they get a fake bill when they sell it on but not realize until they try to use it to pay their parking fine.
Ugghh!!! That totally sucks Fargon. sorry to hear that.
Where was it? How? When?? Were you away?
IT was in my back yard, he picked it up and put it in his pick up, and I was sleeping .
Update: The grill came back about an hour ago, he borrowed it now it has a chain and big pad lock on it.
Who "borrowed" it? and why would they do that without asking?
I hate folks who "borrow" things. The only thing in my yard the neighbors are free to borrow is the poison ivy. :mad2:
Ugggg... that just happened at our house a few weeks ago. We opted for the replacement AC at about $2500. And then after install they find another problem for the internal bit (up in the attic) another cool $2500. That hurt the bank account a bit.
This is an industrial unit. It's 5200 just to replace the compressor. Getting another price in am from another co.....
I don't think the estimates will vary widely.:mad:
Well at least "we" are finally doing what we should have done in 2002 and 2003 instead of running off to Iraq. I hope it isn't too late.
Upsetting is a strong word - disappointed and deflated works better.
I finally got a response to my enquiry regarding a refund of National Insurance for last year.
My calculations suggested it could be as much as £200, although no guidelines are given and I certainly haven't been able to find anything which satisfactorily explains how it is calculated, so I was wary of assuming too much.
Just as well - I am not due any refund apparently.
This is more about mood than any real practical issues. Although I've been impatient for a response, at least it kept the hope of a payoff alive - like not checking your lottery ticket until you get back to work on Monday morning. This has squashed that hope and I obviously hadn't proected myself well for this eventuality because I'm gutted.
Apart from a necklace I had my eye on, or maybe a dress - I kept changing my mind - the money was going to be saved against future needs. Come the Autoumn this might have meant my trip to Amsterdam, or money towards moving out. So it's not like it was an immediate need, a bill to be paid, money owed or anything like that. So I'm lucky in that way.
There's still a possibility I will receive an Income Tax refund, but I was using the same logic when I applied for that, so sadly it is far less likely, having received this response.
I'll just mourn the loss of my little fortune quietly this weekend and pick up where I left off Monday. After all, I'm back on a stricter diet from then, so it all fits in a with a more Spartan lifestyle anyway.
I'm quite bemused that you would expect a refund fom National Insurance -I've never heard of that happening. But income tax, quite likely if you stopped earning partway through the year and whilst still below the threshhold.
Well, I looked at an online calculator, and had I earned the same amount over 12 months, I would have paid approx £200 less. Then I googled National Insurance Refund and it gave an address for queries if you thought you had paid too much.
Damn internets. Giving out information to overly-emotional people!
Am all recovered now. Without the help of alcohol I am pleased to say - which would have meant I was still feeling awful even today.
Though I'm getting a little tired of these dreams.
Dream after dream of hiding things n my bed and worriying about being discovered. Alcohol is a typical one, but the other morning it was dead bodies. I had three in the bed with me and I was torn between revulsion and comfort.
And this morning I dreamed I lost all my teeth - which I know is a common dream for some people, but a new hell for me. AND I was in terrible conflict with an ex work colleague at the same time, and I knew I would lose my job at the next review meeting, but I just couldn't stir myself to do anything about it.
I wake up and bounce merrily out of bed these days.... right.
Lets see... over $200 in food, $220 in booze, 2 days of cleaning and prep... and 3 people bothered to show for my hubby's birthday party. That leaves 8 for sures and 6 maybes un-accounted for that did not bother even calling to cancel. Bah
Lets see... over $200 in food, $220 in booze, 2 days of cleaning and prep... and 3 people bothered to show for my hubby's birthday party. That leaves 8 for sures and 6 maybes un-accounted for that did not bother even calling to cancel. Bah
Now that would PISS me off! Are you going to say anything to those who said they'd be there and didn't show at least?
meh... not worth it. These people knew months ago... one couple just told me they knew there was a party, but was not sure they were invited, so didn't come. Yet I specifically said it was an open house from 5pm until 3am and even stopping by for 15 mins would be cool. Another couple went to the cabin (only 45 mins away)and another couple has been MIA for about a week.. perhaps on holidays. Hubby wasn't surprised, and we had a good time anyway.... it was just disappointing.
So we have AAA rib eye steaks for dinner tonight, freeze the chicken wings, I will freeze the seafood stuffed mushroom caps. I didn't even take the shrimp out of the freezer last night anyway, nor did I cook the veggies I planned to grill.
The booze doesn't go bad, so no worries there. Instead of making up the 3 level cupcake tree into a full shooter tree, we only poured the ones we drank. It did not give the look I wanted, but it was easier. I made 5 of each: (I used clear beer bottles. I have a capper, so they were sealed and put into an ice bucket) -vodka, soda water and orange juice, - vodka, pineapple juice, orange juice and soda water and, - malibu rum, soda water and orange juice spritzers.
The ones not drank will most likely go today, on my hubby's actual birthday :)
That's the spirit. Celebrate being together along with the B-day. The important thing is that you have and care for each other. I would give anything to be able to have a two person party with my wife. Anything.
Have a great day! And tell him we said HAPPY BIRTHDAY!:celebrat::hugnkiss:
As long as he and you had a good time that's all that really matters. Sounds to me like the people who didn't show up were the losers. If I weren't so far away, I'd have been very happy to come for a yummy and fun evening like yours. :) Of course I wasn't invited, but well, I guess there's nothing wrong with a little bit of gate crashing every now and then is there? lol
LOL gate crashing makes a party!!! There is a luau on Sat here, for my birthday, come on over.... I am doing a stuffed turkey on the BBQ, having stuffed mushrooms, mini stuffed peppers, grilled veggie salad, garlic and brie dip, spicy shrimp, long rice noodles and homemade vanilla ice cream with raspberries soaked in raspberry vodka for 2 weeks (soaked then put in the freezer) and then anything everyone (if anyone shows) brings. :)
I'd love to come, but I don't think my plane will get me there in time. ;)
btw, I think you should spend some time in the food and drink forum. You seem to be quite into all that gastronomical stuff. :)
I didn't even take the shrimp out of the freezer last night anyway,
Take out the shrimp, let it sit in the sun a couple days, then mail it to the noshows. ;)
I wish just one, just one mudder-plucking freaking fracking gawddam thing would work right today.
Anything. Just one thing. :mad:
Fuck it.
can you see your new car from where you're sitting?
No.
I want to get in it and drive to Canada or somewhere.
OH, here's a joke:
Q: What sucks worse, men, or work?
A: They both suck equally.
Ain't it a knee-slapper?
edit: I didn't mean YOU men. Sorry...weekend from hell and nothing is going right today. :blush:
At least you can still joke around. Can't be all bad.
Oh, was just having a day. It started with the bag I carried a huge pile of paperwork in (to work on over the weekend...yeah, right) broke and paperwork went all over the parking lot at work this morning. Then it was just a couple major projects for which nothing was working...one of them a huge deal that needs to be complete soon and the site has been on the blitz for a while. I talked to my rep at Ed and it's happening to everyone. Must be a big deal, those sites are usually pretty quick.
The man joke was a result of me, one more time, trying to accomplish what I tried to accomplish many times before. Not a good weekend for me.
So, I just wanted something to go right. ;)
Don't mean to complain, when I have no right to, just venting.
my buddy's kid was in a bad car accident on Wednesday.
Aw hell, Jim. I can't imagine how your friend is feeling - Give them lots of love from us.
I am sorry to hear it, Jim. :(
Bad news. Bad when anything happens to a child. One patient today had a child killed in a car wreck last year, the kid was three. We began to remiss about how the loss of a child at any age is tough. My mother never got over my sisters death from Breast Ca when she was 30 and my mom was in her 60's. Another friend of ours lost her three children in a house fire 20 years ago, she still is in pain over it, but she can talk about it freely. It is never a good thing. As parents it is the one thing we all fear.
Sorry to hear about your friend LJ.
I'm sending all my love and special thoughts.
coma :(
Are you and Big V talking about the same friend's kid? (Parenting thread)
Yes, the friend is a cellarite, a friend to all of us. Keep up the well wishing.
Fuck. I was afraid of that.
Jinx, can you let us know who they are? Is there anything the rest of us can do (besides worrying and sending best wishes)?
or come to chat or email me or whatever.
Oh, dear. :( I am so sorry. You will be in mine (and my family's) prayers.
dammit. Hopefully all of the Cellar love will heal him right quick.
I think knowing how much we all care and are deeply concerned means a lot to him.
Jinx, I pm'ed you my email address.
Yes, the friend is a cellarite, a friend to all of us. Keep up the well wishing.
Wow. Sorry to hear that. Let me know if there is anything I can do to help. Best of thoughts to whom ever out there is going through this. I just wish I knew whom to direct my positive energy to.
Are you and Big V talking about the same friend's kid? (Parenting thread)
Was this established as fact?
A kid ran a red light this morning, when I was almost to work. Demolished my car. I haven't had it but two weeks.
Everyone is OK. Though there were witnesses who saw him run the light he is claiming it's a conspiracy against him, but he is OK and I am OK and they're just vehicles. In the grand scheme, it means nothing. But, still, I'm a bit sad.
Aw that sucks Shaw! Was in insured?
Yeah, he had Progressive, and they have already contacted me and are just waiting on the witness statement and cop report for final word. In the meantime, I talked to Geico and they are now talking to Progressive to see what's best for me. I had full coverage, of course, but I think Pro is going to take care of everything anyway.
I know it's just an object, but it broke my heart. My first new car ever. Still, I must remember how lucky I really am.
Thanks jinx. :)
Jeesus Fuckin Christ Shaw!
[COLOR=DarkOrange]Did you buy the gap insurance?[/COLOR]
I'm really sorry to hear that, Shaw. How disappointing!
Now there is a dispute. Kid is lying his head off. Fuck this. Just fuck it.
Yesterday morning, car was fine, took momwolf to the doctor, left for work, hit the WaWa to acquire some Cheetos, went out to the car, won't start.
Called road service, who dropped it at the dealership, about three miles from the WaWa. So, I couldn't have chosen a better space to have the car suddenly decide not to start. Don't know what's wrong with it yet, haven't heard from the dealership.
Yikes! That's horrible, Shawnee.
Damned expensive bag of Cheetos, Wolf.
Yeah, I'm a freak about admitting when things are my fault: I'm the first one to say when I've fucked up, just as I'll toot my horn when something goes right. It's hard for me to fathom this guy insisting he had the green. The witness, who was waiting also for the red light the kid should have stopped at, was seemingly quite credible to the police officer who I watched arguing with the kid about the lights. In the end, it will work out in my favor and I'm covered by mine anyway, but it's just that slap in the face reminding me how shitty people are that gets to me. :(
Aaawww.......Shawnee - that sucks. Glad you're keeping the attitude that it' sjust an object, but damn. Well now you can get your second new car!
And wow Wolf - $850? Seems a bit steep - can you get a second opinion? Or is it under warranty?
Cars...ugh. Wish we didn't need 'em, right wolf? :)
Queen, I don't know, it's probably fixable, only the front was demolished, but still...they say cars are never quite the same after something like that.
Thanks for the support, guys.
You can get a fuel pump on the net for like $120, if I remember what car you have or similar...
The catch on the fuel pump will prolly be that it's located inside the fuel tank. Thus the steep labor charges. That sounds like a fair price in my geographical area. Sorry Wolf.
And Shaw, That sounds about like my luck. I feel you. You know the stories and attitudes always change later. Whiplash usually sets in after the shock of the accident ebbs... if you catch my drift.
Shawnee - It would be really cool if they'd get him for perjury. That'd teach him to lie when he's giving evidence.
you should both trade your cars in for new nissans.
I think sometimes my family thinks I'm stupid, too. Maybe I am. :(
Jeesus Fuckin Christ Shaw!
What he said.
Sorry to ear about your car, Shawnee. I am sure the insurance company of the kid will cover everything, he is probably lying to not have his insurance go up, or its not the first traffic accident he has been in. While you are fine now, please please please be aware of any stiffness, headaches or pain that might come up in the next few days. Go to the dr right away if you feel anything. Theses things can get worse over time and if you do not catch it BEFORE you settle with his insurance, can end up costing you money.
I was in a car accident 8 years ago ( friend was driving and hit the car in front of her who was stopped to turn) I still have days where I have little to no feeling in 2 fingers due to soft tissue damage and a possible pinched nerve (they can't find nerve damage) in my neck.
I would hate for you to have been hurt without realizing it.
My husband bought me $200ish of lingerie May11, from a place that usually ships within days....It was paid for on May 11. They shipped part of my order the other day, and then the next day shipped the other part. We have been watching the tracking, and Canada Post says it was delivered 2 days ago! Thing is, I don't know who they delivered it to, cause it was not the correct address, we were home all day. Other things were delivered that day, just not my lingerie. So now we have to find out where it is, see who is responsible and hopefully have her ship out another package free of charge (and wait the 2 months back order again). Otherwise whoever received the package might be nice and send it back to the post office. BAH either way.
Sorry to ear about your car, Shawnee. I am sure the insurance company of the kid will cover everything, he is probably lying to not have his insurance go up, or its not the first traffic accident he has been in. While you are fine now, please please please be aware of any stiffness, headaches or pain that might come up in the next few days. Go to the dr right away if you feel anything. Theses things can get worse over time and if you do not catch it BEFORE you settle with his insurance, can end up costing you money.
I was in a car accident 8 years ago ( friend was driving and hit the car in front of her who was stopped to turn) I still have days where I have little to no feeling in 2 fingers due to soft tissue damage and a possible pinched nerve (they can't find nerve damage) in my neck.
I would hate for you to have been hurt without realizing it.
Jaydaan, thank you for that advice. My head did get jerked over into the top of the doorframe, but it doesn't really hurt. He was going pretty fast, though, and I may have hit harder than I thought. My neck feels a bit stiff, but I am the world renowned queen of muscle spasms on a regular basis. I have a bit of a headache, but I cried pretty hard for a while and think I did that myself. :rolleyes:
I will certainly keep in mind what you said, and watch for signs.
I saw him in that millisecond before he hit...just enough time for it to vaguely register what was about to happen. If I had been just ahead by a second, he would have hit me square in the door, hitting me as well. My airbags didn't deploy in this case, but there are six of them in this car so they might have saved injury if he had hit me there, but I am still lucky.
My husband bought me $200ish of lingerie May11, from a place that usually ships within days....It was paid for on May 11. They shipped part of my order the other day, and then the next day shipped the other part. We have been watching the tracking, and Canada Post says it was delivered 2 days ago! Thing is, I don't know who they delivered it to, cause it was not the correct address, we were home all day. Other things were delivered that day, just not my lingerie. So now we have to find out where it is, see who is responsible and hopefully have her ship out another package free of charge (and wait the 2 months back order again). Otherwise whoever received the package might be nice and send it back to the post office. BAH either way.
Do you have any strange male neighbors who might have discovered a gold mine in their new shipment of sexy lingerie? ;)
The $850 is a big bite, but strangely, I trust my dealership's service department. They've done well for me since my purchase of the vehicle, which is now 8 years old. Even if I could get a new fuel pump more cheaply, then what? I have no skillz, although, yes, I know I have friends with skillz, but I need the car back this afterlunch.
LJ, if you weren't in Cherry Hill, I'd certainly consider it. I loved my Datsun 210 ... which tells you how long it's been since I've owned a car from your product line.
What I found when I got up this morning.[ATTACH]24219[/ATTACH]
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a couple more.....[ATTACH]24221[/ATTACH]
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Mother of freaking god...there isn't a rental car to be had from north of here all the way to Cincy, due to the Dayton Air show. Can I get a freaking break?
Not today. Evidently.
You are having a "Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day".
My sympathies.
Hehehee...yeah, not today. My dad just called and said to play the lottery, my luck is gonna change BIG.
So, I added the beater car back onto insurance. :) Yeeesh.
Wow, capnhowdy. Is that where you live?
Will you adopt me? And my extended family? :D
All seriousness aside, it's a beautiful place.
I'm pretty sure that's where he works, meaning it was his job to clean up that mess. :(
My gps took me off of the LIE in Queens while driving to NJ. It was supposedly detecting traffic conditions ahead. So I neglected my better judgment and did what it told me. It had no idea where the fuck I was in about 3 minutes. :mad2::mad2::mad2: While I was lost it just recalculated. I got to where I was supposed to be 45 minutes late, but the worst part is that I had fender bender outside of a tunnel that I wouldn't have been anywhere near had it not been for that fucking GPS. :meanface::meanface::meanface::meanface:
So you're saying you were targeted for elimination by Garmin? O brave new world...
Maybe not targeted, but definitely hit like a bulls eye.
The navman does the same thing. We had a trip of over an hour the other day because I wasn't quite sure how to get somewhere. Turns out (after taking a trip to China) that I could have driven there in less than half the time it took the navman to get me there in.
Wow, capnhowdy. Is that where you live?
Will you adopt me? And my extended family? :D
All seriousness aside, it's a beautiful place.
Not my place, Dar. I am the Butler/ Caretaker there. I am housesitting at the moment, (with brief relief from one cow orker). But I am responsible for everything that happens there from the kids making it to school/dance/cheer/gym/ et al..... toilets flushing to bank deposits.... yada yadayada....
Six full timers here. Yeah... resonsible for them too. 5 kids, one autistic. Six cars 9 4 wheelers, 2 motorcycles and a golf cart. I love my fucking job, and my job loves fucking me.
I started as their personal graphic/faux artist, but we finished the project and well.... Here I am. Nice salary, too... I might add. But basically 24/7. The bar is always stocked tho. Hell... I stock it.:D
Another one of life's little pluses;).
My gps took me off of the LIE in Queens while driving to NJ. It was supposedly detecting traffic conditions ahead. So I neglected my better judgment and did what it told me. It had no idea where the fuck I was in about 3 minutes. :mad2::mad2::mad2: While I was lost it just recalculated. I got to where I was supposed to be 45 minutes late, but the worst part is that I had fender bender outside of a tunnel that I wouldn't have been anywhere near had it not been for that fucking GPS. :meanface::meanface::meanface::meanface:
I deal with that by saying, "Shut up, DirectionsBitch. I'm driving where I want to."
Latest update on the car thing. I had a ride arranged to either work or the dealership today. I called shortly before I was to leave, and they said the car should be ready around 1730. Not good, as I have to be in work at 1600.
Ride came, momwolf's friend was nice enough to even stop off at the convenience store for me so I could grab a soda.
Got to work a bit early, so went in to find chaos erupting all over and the day shift trying to scoot out of there like scalded cats. Went into the nurses station, swiped in, and my phone rang.
Yeah. The car was done and available to be picked up. I actually had up until 2000 to get there.
No such luck. It was so freaking busy I couldn't even take the 15 minutes or so it would have taken to get a ride down, pay, and ride back.
I will have to arrange for a ride to the dealership tomorrow.
Shawnee: Oh Noes! No no no!
Since your car was so new, can you get "new for old" replacement? Down here, if your car is less than 12 months old, they give you a new one (and take ownership of the old and repair it if possible). Chase your insurance company for that.
Wolf: damn, $850 for a fuel pump? That seems like a lot to me. But then, I've mostly owned old-style, simple cars.
Capn: nice billet! but the toilet paper wrapping is pretty minor, really; more of a "mildly irritating" thing I would have said. Teenage dickheadery, no doubt, but they didn't smash stuff or steal stuff.
My brother is talking to an attorney friend (brother has pullz) and from now on both insurance companies are going to have to talk directly to my lawyer. Seems that even my insurance agency will try to cheap out by getting it fixed where THEY want, maybe not even using Saturn parts.
I am unable to bargain, threaten, insist...so this is probably the best route. As I lamented how evil and thieving the world is (I can only be honest, I don't understand anything else) my brother said you can't change it, it just is, and you have to deal with it...and mentioned his friend.
How far I would have gone in this world if only I had been a stone cold evil and lying person.
A kid ran a red light this morning, when I was almost to work. Demolished my car. I haven't had it but two weeks.
Everyone is OK. Though there were witnesses who saw him run the light he is claiming it's a conspiracy against him, but he is OK and I am OK and they're just vehicles. In the grand scheme, it means nothing. But, still, I'm a bit sad.
WOW! that totally sucks. Sorry to hear about that. From reading the rest of the threads it sounds like they are going to take care of things. Was it brand new?
How far I would have gone in this world if only I had been a stone cold evil and lying person.
Possibly a very long way. And you could be Madoff Rich.
WOW! that totally sucks. Sorry to hear about that. From reading the rest of the threads it sounds like they are going to take care of things. Was it brand new?
Well, it was getting old, I'd racked up 700 miles on it. ;) Had it 2 weeks to the day, and brand-spanking new. It's an 08, but there are no 09 Astras to be had.
I think my brother's right...put pressure on them with the lawyer and get this off my plate. Being sick, then the accident, tomorrow is a retreat day...so much to do at work. I need this job to pay the attorney to get my car fixed to get to the job that pays the attorney that gets my car fixed and this is the house that Jack built.
I still crack me up, even when I'm cracking up. :p
:thumb: Hang in there. Remember the legal term "To make whole". Which is the obligation of the kids insurance company. I hate insurance companies, all kinds, auto, health, malpractice, home, they all suck. Yet our society has made us their slaves.
I completely agree with you about insurance companies!
Kick 'em in the cunt, shaw.
Kick 'em in the cunt, shaw.
That is the best idea I've heard yet! I'll have "my lawyer" (I love saying that I feel like someone important) kick 'em in the cunt! Supposed to get a call this afternoon.
Counsel: AHEM....your honor, approach?
Judge: Come
Counsel leans in: move to kick the defendant in the cunt, your honor?
Judge: Motion granted. Bailiff!
:lol: Would the defendant please rise....
Lawyer might take that case pro boner.
:lol: Would the defendant please rise....
Defense Lawyer: Your Honor, my client is unable to rise due to the kick-in-the-cunt judgement previously applied. If it please the court, he will continue to lay on the floor and writhe in agony.
The bar is always stocked tho. Hell... I stock it.:D
Another one of life's little pluses;).
Sounds like a good deal overall. How long did it take you to clean up the TP?
Well... we tracked down 1 of the 2 shipments of lingerie.... at our old house 2 years ago, and 2 orders ago... sheesh. Get this, it was opened, cause the lady thought it was a joke. The box was open, the outfit was not. When I asked at the door if a parcel was sent there by mistake, he had to go ask his wife, but then during our conversation admitted to knowing it was there... they were going to keep it! The other half of the parcel (3 outfits) was sent the day before, chances are they got that one too.
So I finally get my outfit and ...... its not the one we ordered! This one is white, we ordered black. This one is a tux style jacket, we ordered a short crop top style. This one has a pleated skirt, we ordered a tight form fitting mini skirt... BAH
nevermind all that. where are the pics?
Ok, so I was having a good day, now, I am having some side effects to the procedure that I had last week (trust me, you don't want to know) and now I have to go back to the freaking doctor tomorrow! I thought I was done with them for a couple months! ARG!!
Oh, we want to know...but you don't have to tell us.
I hope it works out okay, bbro!
Sounds like a good deal overall. How long did it take you to clean up the TP?
I found out this AM that it was a group of 8 kids. Six of them are our employees at another business. A neighbor ratted him out and in turn, the kid spilled the beans on the rest of the gang. I threatened them with their jobs and the police and VOILA! They all came back later and cleaned it up. Smart move. It took all of them about 5 hrs to get it done. I was meticulous about it too. Every scrap. I even made them wash the dish soap off of the driveways.
A deputy rode up as they were cleaning and asked if I needed a report. Those kids were sweating bullets. I told him no... they were employees and assisting me and I had no clue who it could have been. They were grateful, I think. Swore they'd never do it again. Case closed. At least until our boss gets back from vacation.:D
Wow, at my rural HS, it was an honor to be toilet-papered. Of course, the 'rents were always like "Yeah, YOU'RE cleaning it up" and we did. Football season it was almost mandatory. My mom said my brother called her after he got to school one day and said she had to drive to the little town near my HS: a bunch of kids had tp'd the entire main street. Mom went, and thought it was awesome. She couldn't believe how thorough they were...sleepy little one horse towns, no one heard a thing. One of my friend's moms even drove us around one night to tp: we got caught by one family of schoolmates and they chased us down the street...we hopped into friend's mom's getaway car and friend's mom sped off. I mean, it was fun! It wasn't, like, criminal. ;)
It IS hilarious. Until you have to clean it up in 100 degree weather. Or have to pay a few hundred bucks to get it done. I actually enjoyed it this time. Last time was a different story. Took me 12 hrs hard work to get it done. With all my friends riding by honking and laughing. Most people think it's funny. Then it happens to them.
ETA
If the recipient chooses to press charges, kids are stuck with a criminal record for the rest of their lives on two charges:
criminal trespass
and vandalism.
A kid ran a red light this morning, when I was almost to work. Demolished my car. I haven't had it but two weeks.
Everyone is OK. Though there were witnesses who saw him run the light he is claiming it's a conspiracy against him, but he is OK and I am OK and they're just vehicles. In the grand scheme, it means nothing. But, still, I'm a bit sad.
Damn, I'm always late. Anyways, glad to hear you're okay, but it really sucks what happened to your car. Sorry to hear what you have to go through with the insurance company. Hope everything will work out.
As for everyone, I AM SORRY TO HEAR THAT YOUR DAY SUCKED! :p Sorry, I don't have much time anymore and after reading a few pages, I feel bad for not being here to give my consolations. Seems like so much can happen in a day or two.
:)
From now on, Miss Tulip, I expect you to read every thread in the Cellar thoroughly before responding. ;)
Thanks for your kind words.
Nicely handled, Capn. All's well that ends well.
Nicely handled, Capn. All's well that ends well.
Whoops, read that as Capon :eek:
Whoops, read that as Capon :eek:
Hey. I never said he was chicken.
... ya whippersnappers! :mad:
You love you some whippersnappers, Bruce!
Well I'll have you know ... I've snapped a few whippers in my younger days as well.:whip::lol2:
Yeah but these ain't your younger days, ya old fart.:p
The central AC is just humming !!!
And we just had it fixed ( supposedly )
Another funeral today. One of my close friends died in a boating accident. At least I don't have to sing at this one. RIP, Jerry.
Story (from local news)
Sorry to hear it mate. RIP.
The wildfires are closer than I would like. My best friend's parents are on evacuation alert, and the ashes are covering EVERYTHING! We are hoping it gets contained, and they do not have to leave and/or lose their home. The smoke is quite thick here too.
We have 3 fires atm: Terrace mountain, Glen Rosa Kelowna, and another one on Westside.....
Makes for great pictures of the sun, which is bright red atm, mind you.
Ouch - Jaydaan, that's crappy.
Very sorry to hear it. Hoping for the best.
There are fires out of control in Spain too, affecting one of Mum's friends.
Talking of Mum's friends - a different friend.
Breda has cancer.
The "bad arm" she's been getting painkillers for is actually cancer. I don't have all the details, but I am worried because the first sign my Nan was ill was when she lost control of her arm and it turned out to be cancer. They couldn't even locate the primary source - by the time she got to hospital it was everywhere. Three weeks from diagnosis to death.
I'm trying to be rational about Breda, but I have just found out (a call from her daughter - Mum's out) so it's hit me hard - her daughter says it's inoperable.
Breda is (very) Irish, (very) Catholic - she is one of my nephew's Godmothers, and was our neighbour for years. She is very close to Mum - they used to visit eachother every Sunday morning, and still talk at least once a week. She is a lovely lady, and it's just really close to home. I even got a birthday card from her this year - I think Mum told her I'd be alone on the day.
Just sharing.
Sorry to hear about your mom's friend, SG. :(
She's round there now.
I might have some more accurate news once she comes back.
Poor Breda of course (& family & all) but poor Mum too.
She had a call that Aunty Alice's house was sold just this morning. That's her Aunt - my Great Aunt,
That means that probate can finally go ahead and all the Aunts & Uncles won't keep calling and subtly implying that it's all taking too long. She's taken a lot on her shoulders in the past year and it's not fair. Sadly, she's taken it out on Dad (and that's splashed on me too) but it is unfair - she doesn't inherit a penny, and yet it's consumed her life for the past year - worry and stress and phone calls and visits to the house. I loved Alice, but she was selfish in nominating Mum an executor - sensible (Mum is SO organised!) but selfish - some of the other cousins actually live in the area. She'd have been better leaving no will, the money would have been distributed exactly the same way (to the siblings - Alice was the first to die) and Mum would never have had all the worry.
Anyway, so she finally gets some good news re the house - then she has this to deal with.
See what she says when she comes back re Breda.
My mom is also very organized, and often gets put in that position. She's a trooper, but I can't imagine taking anything like that on. This is, sadly, a trait I did not get from my mom. I can barely take care of my own crap, let alone help someone else. I really wish I were more like my mom in that respect, but I am the polar opposite.
Keep me updated on Breda.
And, fuck cancer! :(
Spine and lung apparently - exactly the same as Nanny.
She'll have radiotherapy - waiting for an appointment - but no prognosis currently. The impression given is that it's really just pain relief from here on in (like Nan).
Bloody hell.
Mum's blaming herself of course. Thinks she should have spotted it. Hasn't gone to Mass tonight (Dad's just left). She doesn't fit the stereotypical Catholic image in that way - she's upset therefore she doesn't pray. I wonder if I can get away with a Fuck Cancer card? Maybe Sod Cancer would be more acceptable - and probably shocking in its difference to other cards anyway.
Damn - she's a good woman.
My heart goes out to your mom and her friend. :(
You'd (all) have loved her.
She's like Mrs Doyle in Father Ted.
And I am always lovely in her eyes.
Oh isn't your hair lovely now, and your dress and doesn't that hair colour suit you now, and look at those lovely shoes, and have you caught the sun - it suits you, and look at the weight you've lost, and would you like a cup of tea now, and don't you look lovely?
Will keep you updated.
Hugs to you and your mum, SG.
So sorry Sundae. Fuck Cancer.
Wal mart pissed me off good today, after getting everything on the list I got to check out. And when I tried to use my debt card it would not work. The idiot running the register asked me if I had another way to pay because they are remodeling and the card readers do not work. so now I have to go to the other walmart and do it all over again. I left the cart sitting and walked out. If their equipment is not going to work during the remodel they need to close until it is done. Am I being an asshole or not?
You are being reasonable. If they won't take your money, they can restock that crap themselves, and they should apologize to you for wasting your time. This is 2009. Most people use plastic to pay for large shopping trips. If the machines are down, the store ought to close, or at least have a huge freaking sign on every door when you go in that it's cash only.
Wal mart pissed me off good today, after getting everything on the list I got to check out. And when I tried to use my debt card it would not work. The idiot running the register asked me if I had another way to pay because they are remodeling and the card readers do not work. so now I have to go to the other walmart and do it all over again. I left the cart sitting and walked out. If their equipment is not going to work during the remodel they need to close until it is done. Am I being an asshole or not?
The idiot checkout person stood there and scanned in your entire basket full of items, carried out the whole transaction without saying a word, all based on the assumption that you carry around a big roll of hundreds around like a drug dealer?
I would have done worse than what you did. I don't know what, but I would have caused a scene.
Edit:
The Service Industry in America Edit:
Jimmy Dean Sausage Complaint Call
Edit: The Service Industry in America Edit: Jimmy Dean Sausage Complaint Call
Thanks flint... I lol'd all over again. Awesome thread.
Oh wow, I'm so glad I looked
IT WILL NEVER, EVER GET RESOLVED UNLESS I FVCKING YELL AT EACH ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE FOR X AMOUNT OF MINUTES UNTIL THEY PASS ME ON. The system is designed so that YOU HAVE TO YELL AT PEOPLE or else nothing gets done EVER.
This is so true, and why I get fvcked all the fvcking time! Really, I only yell on the internet. :lol:
My dad was just talking about this, as we discussed my current nightmare with my new car, telling me I need to be a squeaky wheel. They want the squeaky wheel to stop fvcking squeaking, so the squeaky wheel gets what they want.
I wish I could be a squeaky wheel.
Also, that Jimmy Dean call is hilarious!
Or get a professional squeaky wheel and sue.
Upsetting me today:
dunno, you'll have to ask my large intestine.
Or get a professional squeaky wheel and sue.
Part of the problem is that my professional squeaky wheel isn't squeaking to my satisfaction. So I should squeak at my designated squeaky wheel, right? The whole reason for the professional squeaky wheel was to avoid me trying to squeak and only end up looking stupid, and sounding squeaky.
However, my car is FINALLY being transported to the Saturn dealer for repair. It's a good repair shop, by all accounts, and they'll have it as new again as is possible.
Apparently, Collision Boy's insurance still needs to step up to the plate: so I'm out the deductible until that's settled. :right:
Petty Motherfucking Bitch who is only concerned with herself and her own bullshit. Get a fuckin' life of your own fer chrissakes! Like there isn't enough REALLY important shit going on right now that you gotta start on my Fuckin mom and not let her pray at the rehab for her grandson - Holy Fuckin shit - Its a good thing my guns are at my dads!
thank you all - as you were
I second that! And I don't even like guns!
Though at first I thought you were yelling at me...lol.
;)
Crikey.
All I can say is, things are very different in America, esp attitudes towards customer service and shooting people. Don't get me wrong, I get pissed off at bad service. I whinge and rant. But it's not considered a "right" here (we don't have them :)) Then again, I've come up against this before, here.
And relationship/ family disputes... still I should realise that praying, rehab and guns in one sentence take it out of the realm of my understanding.
Okay, so what I came to vent is small beans compared to Yesman's case. Sorry.
Mum has been reacting to a financial issue all week.
And it's not all that bad (the issue) because my Great Aunt's settlement is finally in sight.
But the pressure, plus the fact she is on her own all day (paid petsitting at my SIL's parents' house) means she's been a complete bitch every night. Sorry, but she has - I've stayed in my room in earplugs, and eaten at 17.00 so I can avoid being around when she comes home.
And yes, I have done all I can in terms of housework etc to try to assuage her.
I don't know exactly what the problem is, apart from her usual simmering anger, but nothing is right and she resents both me & my Dad this week.
Funnily enough, this is not to do with Mum - although the problems with her are stopping me sleeping this week.
I asked if she would like to see La Cage Aux Folles in the West End because John Barrowman is in it. She wants to use up the theatre vouchers she got when she retired. So it's a yes! Happy, happy!
She asked Dad - of course. I'd love it to be a family outing. But she said, "I don't think you'd like it." She started her desription of the musical with, "Two gays are bringing up a son...." My Dad turned his face away at once. Now I'm not blaming Mum for her precis - which was basic, but accurate I suppose. It's my Dad's homophobia that bothers me. I know it's there. I've heard it more than once. But the idea it extends to fiction/ musical theatre. When he's been to see so much in the West End/ watched musicals on TV. It's like, gay talent is fine, as long as it's played straight.
Sigh.
The child of his time/ adopted religion.
It just hurts that a man I love so much and admire, and I know to be so gentle and tolerant in other ways can hate and dismiss so many people.
Upsets me.
... it's not considered a "right" here ...
In your muddled attempt to frame this as some sweeping cultural chasm, what exactly is it that you think Americans consider a "right" that is unrealistically owed to them--specifically, that has been central to any of the stories presented here?
They tore my car down to see if there was more extensive damage. There was. I don't know what's going to happen now. :sniff:
Little Fuckboy is going to fucking pay, one way or another, law-breaking motherfucker go back to your home country if you can't act like a fucking human: we have enough lying motherfuckers who we have to keep because they were born here. :mad2:
In your muddled attempt to frame this as some sweeping cultural chasm, what exactly is it that you think Americans consider a "right" that is unrealistically owed to them--specifically, that has been central to any of the stories presented here?
Brit consumer laws are much more well defined than American ones, and legally-speaking consumers are better protected.
But this is fairly recent in the scheme of things, and Brits are so used to shitty service and products, and making a scene is socially unacceptable even if you are in the right (stiff upper lip) ....that many people do not follow up on their complaints and write off the loss.
Compared to US where -in general- consumer protection laws are minimal, but standard practice is not to require customers to justify complaints and making a scene gets results rather than disapproval.
If you had behaved in the UK as you described, you would probab;y have been arrested for causing a disturbance of the peace. And it's very unlikely you would have got a refund/replacement. But then brits don't expect presents for every occasion like Americans do. And when we get them, we open them straight away. Most Brits, anayway. it is a cultural chasm. But then you live in texas -WTF would you know about the rest of the world? :p
He knows Texas has bigger cockroaches than the rest of the world. :p
He knows Texas has bigger cockroaches than the rest of the world. :p
I don't reckon Texas has bigger cockroaches than Queensland.
Queensland has the biggest mo fo roaches I've ever seen!!!
Where you been, Ali?
My back. I don't know wtf I have done to it. Thursday evening it started. Friday I was in such a bad way mum had to come walk the dog for me. And then again yesterday.
Today is marginally better but still painful. can;'t sit here at the desk for more than a few minutes.
Bloody annoying thing is I had loads planned for this weekend. Wanted to sort my house out (sort through loads of old papers, hoover up, wash curtains etc). Can't even stay here long enough to upload my graduation photos (another task I had planned for t his weekend).
Bleh.
I just hope it's sorted out by tomorrow. I have a busy week ahead, i can;t afford to be out of action.
Looking at all the shelter pet postings on craigslist, and I can't adopt a single one. They look so sad!
A stupid family down the road moved, leaving their chow-chow behind. Stupid fucks. Now its hanging around our house and we can't keep it. we'll have to turn it into a shelter, but its shy and we haven't been able to catch it. It turns my stomach. Stupid irresponsible fucks leaving behind their dog.
Looking at all the shelter pet postings on craigslist, and I can't adopt a single one. They look so sad!
A stupid family down the road moved, leaving their chow-chow behind. Stupid fucks. Now its hanging around our house and we can't keep it. [COLOR="Red"]we'll have to turn it into a shelter[/COLOR], but its shy and we haven't been able to catch it. It turns my stomach. Stupid irresponsible fucks leaving behind their dog.
...maybe a small yurt?
In my area abandoning an animal is a criminal offense. They deserve to be reported and prosecuted.
Queensland has the biggest mo fo roaches I've ever seen!!!
Where you been, Ali?
The boys have been sick mate. The doc suspected swine flu, so they were both on tamiflu all week last week. Mav is back at school today, but Aden is having one more day home today.
Tomorrow I have to go to a funeral and it sucks. I know I'm going to lose the plot. It was a family friend who died of the same type of cancer as my Mum and he was about the same age. Cancer fucking sux and I'm fucking sick of it interfering in people's lives.
The boys have been sick mate. The doc suspected swine flu, so they were both on tamiflu all week last week. Mav is back at school today, but Aden is having one more day home today.
I think here in the US anyone suspected of swine flu is tested. I don't know if there is a post immunizaton. I hope it isn't the swine.
I don't usually get flu shots but I've been wondering if I should for this one. Might be a good topic for a thread around flu season?
Me too Ali.:thepain:
I hope you don't have the swine flu griff. :thepain:
Get better soon.
I was hating on cancer. I don't know what I've got but it probably doesn't rise to full blown flu... just uncomfortable as hell.
sky, they didn't test the kids. They just said to quarantine them for 7 days and put them on tamiflu. That's really the only treatment they'd have for it if it were swine flu anyway, and it was a viral infection, so the tamiflu would have treated that anyway, so either way, they were covered. The reason they thought it was probably swine flu is because they had come into contact with someone with it, and within 24 hours they had most of the symptoms themselves. That was the point at which I took them to the doc.
I was really pissed off about them getting it from our neighbours, who invited them over to watch the footy last weekend, and then half an hour later said, "oh yeah, we've all have swine flu this week". Idiots!
eta: Just as a side note to this, people who take their kids out or have other kids over when there's illness about give me the shits. What kind of fuckwits invite you into their house when it's possible that it might still be contaminated??? Especially when they know you have a baby in your own home who could really suffer if exposed to a virus???? The other thing that shits me are people who don't seem to care about passing their bugs on to other people. WTF planet do these people live on??? Do they think it's ok for other people to suffer just because they are or do they think they're providing some kind of service to the universe?
I'm sick of fucking idiots and I'm sick of...well, just a lot of things right now.
They got it from your neighbors! who knew they had it!
what dummys! what were they thinking!? grr
side note
I guess the CDC discontinued official reporting of individual cases on July 24, 2009.
http://www.cdc.gov/h1n1flu/surveillanceqa.htmI had that argument with one of the ladies here at work, I was pissing n moaning because there was a kid at Kinder with gastro, the Mum said she had the runs n pukes all the day before, but still send her to Kinder.
The lady at work was like....oh some Mum's dont get paid if they dont go to work. Tuff shit, I keep the boys home when they are sick.
And lose your job? Then what?
The boys have been sick mate. The doc suspected swine flu, so they were both on tamiflu all week last week. Mav is back at school today, but Aden is having one more day home today.
Tomorrow I have to go to a funeral and it sucks. I know I'm going to lose the plot. It was a family friend who died of the same type of cancer as my Mum and he was about the same age. Cancer fucking sux and I'm fucking sick of it interfering in people's lives.
Fuck cancer.
Fuck cancer.
and then butt-fuck it in the mouth. (ref. this months cellar calendar!)
And lose your job? Then what?
If you have absolutely zero flexibility with your job (usually kids being sick just means you use up your own sick/vacation days to stay home, but let's say you have no sick days left,) then you have to have another option in place--a relative you can leave the kids with, or maybe the kid's old enough to be left home alone and you come to check on them during your lunch break, or you get hardass with your boss and invoke FMLA to stay home without pay. But dropping the sick kid off at school is free and convenient, so most people take that option if they can get away with it.
So, what is the deal with this swine flu anyway? Have there been many deaths? Have there been more deaths than is usual with any type of flu?
I hear about people being ill and suspecting swine flu, but I don't see droves of people falling over dead, as we were led to believe. Of course, I haven't left my office in a couple hours. :lol:
So, while all flu sucks, can't we just get the regular old flu anymore? Is the swine flu the big deal it was supposed to be?
My car is totalled: transmission damage among other things. Pretty good for a kid who was just slowly cruising down the road obeying all traffic signals. He hit it HARD! I should have known by the way my head slammed against the door frame. :mad:
They're saying there just aren't that many cars like mine left out there: I know they have a few in Cincinnati, Columbus... Someone's ass is going to find me an exact replica. Or the twilight blue is nice, I'd settle for that. ;)
Nightmare entering Stage 2, progressing toward light at end of tunnel. Sigh...
That sucks Shawnee! Hang in there.
Damm that sucks, tell them since you can't replace that one they have to get you one that is better.
Yeah, the Saturn Sky is pretty freaking sweet. ;)
http://www.saturnskyredline.net/Ok, I am digging that. It would look great in black or candy apple red.
note to self: Do not let wife see this car.
Isn't GM dumping Saturn? I thought I read that somewhere.
Shawnee, I think it is GOOD that your car is totalled. If it was repairable, you'd get it back, 95% fixed, but it would never be the same again.
This way, you get a new shiny one with no subtle twisting of the frame or doors that don't quite shut perectly or anything. So long as you like the new one. Keep squeaking.
Oh and swine flu is no more dangerous than regular seasonal flu. Possibly even
less dangerous. The vast majority of people who have died with swine flu had other, much more serious, medical conditions as well.
New Scientist is maintaining a web page about it at
http://www.newscientist.com/special/swine-flu .
That's right. The only reason the doc put Aden and Mav on tamiflu was because of Max. He wanted them to be 'non-contagious' as quickly as possible. Supposedly it's 4 days once you're on the drugs.
@ Zen, I think you're right about the car being totalled. My biggest fear was that somehow I was going to end up paying for a brand new car and not get it replaced because I would SOMEHOW get screwed over in the deal, and be stuck with nothing. I had a talk with my big brother over the weekend (who has been through something very similar) and he explained things more to me. It will be over, it's just a car, and I'm OK...but DAMN it's been frustrating (and I worked so hard to finally be able to buy it.) :)
Yeah, I'd just wondered about the flu thing. I was really hoping for all colleges to shut down for a week or so, to avoid the droves dropping over dead. ;)
The seriousness of the swine flu varies according to who you hear from.
The Washington Post had an
opinion piece on Sunday by a guy who is saying that around 10 Million people will die of the swine flu globally. Possibly a lot more.
The article says that around a third of the people exposed to the virus are currently catching it, and around half a percent of those are dying of it. Those statistics are coming mostly out of the industrialized world. He expects it to get much worse once it hits lesser developed countries with poor health care.
I just woke up and I am not yet upset.
I had a totally suckful day yesterday and I had an argument with my whole family last night, mainly because I feel totally taken for granted atm, and because I was feeling very down after the funeral I just thought they might have had a bit more compassion.
No such luck.
So I told them all what a bunch of selfish arseholes they are and went to bed.
I feel no better this morning.
eta: It was to do with the boys having to be asked numerous times to clean up their room (big deal) along with a few other little things, and just a residual issue with Daryl from the weekend that resurfaced because I felt like shit (yes I don't do that usually. It's counterproductive, but I needed to get my feelings off my chest). Basically they were just being the same as they always are - boys - and I feel isolated at the moment for some reason. My hair is falling out and my skin is out of control and I just feel like it's the end of the world. I talked to the doctor and they said it's normal. I'm starting to think she's wrong.
Yeah, I'm feeling this way just because I'm a woman.
Oh, ba.
You love them and they love you.
I'm sure they're shits short term though.
The red-tops like to suggest women are both ridiculous, and irresponsible (if they work) or hard bitches who are unreasonable and overly appreciative of the real value of money if they don't (which is why they feature shirts at £230 and bags £500+.... of course)
I never thought I'd have an issue with another woman - well, at least one I didn't know. But I'm sick & tired of a witch who has a combined income of £80k writing about restaurants, bags and shoes. Fuck you. You're not even interesting! Come write wbout not being able to afford Occupational Pottery. Eh? Stuff that up your skinny arse!
ETA - sorry. Not addressed to anyone here. Watched a bit too much TV tonight.
'Skay. I know that woman. She IS a bitch.
You know who shits me from Pommy TV? The bloody Tamsin Day-Lewis chick.
God I wish my life was that fucking perfect!
Nothing to worry about, no one needs to get any flu shots. Nothing to see here, just move right along.
I can SEE the forest fire from our window...BAH
It's very pretty and terrifying at the same time.
I can SEE the forest fire from our window...BAH
It's very pretty and terrifying at the same time.
Get off the bloody internet then. Either prepare your house, defend your house, evacuate, or at least take some flamin' pictures!
Seriously, best wishes for you Jaydaan, those things are scary and dangerous. Let us know when the danger has passed.
Yeah, I was thinking that unless there's a bloody great river between her and the fire she needs to do something other than look at it.
I second the 'let us know that you're safe' thought expressed above Jaydaan.
there is a great bloody lake between me and the fire... and I have a picture on my facebook.....
http://www.facebook.com/home.php#/photo.php?pid=2235017&id=529052471&ref=nfIt is kilometres away, and honestly there IS a lake between me and it.. but this is the first time we have been close enough to
SEE it.
Smell it, have smoke every where... have ashes cover our car and deck.... but SEE it is different.......
My son's PPCD teacher sent his school supply list in the mail. Finally. School starts in less than two weeks--which is plenty of time for bullshit things like construction paper and glue and all that, no problem.
But... number one on the list is a full-size backpack, because while she acknowledges the 3-year-olds look ridiculous trying to carry something that's 3/4ths as tall as they are, it's really necessary in order to fit all the progress folders that get sent home.
Fair enough. But it would have really, really helped if I'd had this information an extra two weeks ago, before I took Minifob to pick out his special (miniature) Lightning McQueen backpack, put photos of it in his social story about starting school, and let him play with it each day. I'm trying to make some small dent in the nasty, nasty transition this is going to be for him, and she just set us back farther than we would have been if I'd not tried to prepare him at all.
Right now, my plan is to go buy a full-size Lightning McQueen backpack on the sly, take new photos, re-print and replace his social story on his bookshelf, and act as if this has been his special new backpack all along. He will certainly notice, and there will be fits because we obviously don't deal well with change, but the only way he'll get past it is if the old one is quietly eaten by ninjas in the night, never to be seen again.
wtf? A full-size backpack? How big are these reports anyway?
Well, they're like a normal-sized school folder. And to be fair, one of those wouldn't really fit in the miniature preschooler backpacks without crushing the top of it. The problem is there isn't much in the way of "in-between" sized backpacks.
Would one with wheels help? And do you think he'd be amenable to that? (That's what PRincess had for Kindergarten.)
I'm getting 4 grand less than I paid for the car. Fucking fucker fuck insurance motherfuckers. The law makes you have insurance, but they'll screw you over if you try to use it.
What a disappointment to come back to after a lovely lunch.
:(
My attorney says Geico says that "that model depreciates pretty quickly." 4 grand for two weeks and 507 miles? What a fucking crock.
I'm so upset. I guess I won't be replacing it with the same car, unless Saturn can find me a really good deal. :(
For something that wasn't even remotely MY fault. All I ever did was work my ass off. Fuckin' world.
You have the option of not settling for that amount and pushing for more. Ask that they replace your vehicle with one in the same condition. Have your attorney push harder.
I tried, lawyer says no go.
I'll just have to work with what I have. Oh well. It's not the worst thing that could ever happen, just disappointing.
Fuck that - Tell the scumbag, punkass mo fo's insurance company - NOT YOURS!
Shawnee-I just saw the photo of your new car. Then I found this thread. From happy to sad in a couple of seconds flat. I feel like cussing. I'll spare you guys......this time.
When you get insurance over there, do you have the option of new for old replacement if the vehicle is written off within the first two years?
It's pretty common place over here, although it is fairly recent (last few years). I suppose I figured it would be pretty much the same most places.
That's a bummer Shawnee, can you maybe get the same model and just extend the loan or something?
I was a bit uninformed about what I was covering, and never expecting this to happen. I set it up online, without the knowledge of an insurance expert. So, I will take the fault for that.
They are trying to get rid of the Astras, as they are not shipping them over anymore and they need the lot space. I might be able to replace it. If not, I have a Plan B. I just never expected any of this.
Thanks for the kind words everyone. :)
In the grand scheme, it IS just a car. Just so very disappointing.
And Cic? Please, cuss away. I have! :lol:
Shawnee, I'd encourage you to fight. Your lawyer is a pansy. You do not have to accept the insurance company's offer.
Maybe you could get an "ex-demonstration" model from a dealer, with a few months use on it.
I like my salesperson, and think he will help me out. If not...I will.
My lawyer was highly recommended. But what money is there in a tiny property claim? Sigh...
I should get The Tiger on my side. Bri will know what I'm talking about. :)
Well, they're like a normal-sized school folder. And to be fair, one of those wouldn't really fit in the miniature preschooler backpacks without crushing the top of it. The problem is there isn't much in the way of "in-between" sized backpacks.
Oh, I see. I like your game plan. It will work out with nary a notice, I'm thinking.
Shawnee, Minifob has autism. He will notice. He will not like change. There will be tantrums. It will have to be managed.
Teacher could have done better.
My point is that Clod is stuck with the outcome, as she well knows: and she has a gameplan to help make him notice less. I think it will work.
I have been paying attention, and I don't think I'm completely insensitive to the situation. If I was, I apologize.
Absolutely Teacher could have done better, but Teacher didn't. Clod works on a game plan. That's all I meant.
Me too. group hug?
Kumbaya, my lord, kumbaya....
Talk to the hand and kumbaya yourself, k?
Bleh...:rolleyes:
"When I was a kid" speech. . ..
We were expected to show up to school with notebook paper (preferably in a notebook) and/or spiral notebooks, along with some pens and pencils. There was no such thing as a "school supply list." If we needed something particular, the teacher would say so at the time. ("OK, next week we're going to start on geometry. Everybody needs to get a protractor." etc.)
Now we get extensive, detailed lists. (3 1-inch thick binders and 1 3-inch binder.) To add insult to injury, in some cases stuff that was on the list was never used! (4x6" post-it notes??? We couldn't find any--we "made do" with 3.5x5" and then they never used them.)
I'm convinced Staples is paying off teachers.
I've spent over $300, so far, on school supplies for the coming year. Haven't bought my post it notes yet, but I use the shit out of them.
Try toilet paper jinx, not quite so effective at getting the icky bits off, but much less uncomfortable.
"When I was a kid" speech. . ..
We were expected to show up to school with notebook paper (preferably in a notebook) and/or spiral notebooks, along with some pens and pencils. There was no such thing as a "school supply list." If we needed something particular, the teacher would say so at the time. ("OK, next week we're going to start on geometry. Everybody needs to get a protractor." etc.)
Now we get extensive, detailed lists. (3 1-inch thick binders and 1 3-inch binder.) To add insult to injury, in some cases stuff that was on the list was never used! (4x6" post-it notes??? We couldn't find any--we "made do" with 3.5x5" and then they never used them.)
I'm convinced Staples is paying off teachers.
The thing that irritates me is when they use parents to cover their janitorial supply budget. Among other things, our list included two boxes of Kleenex, two tubes of Wet Ones, and a box of quart-size Ziplock baggies with EZ sliders. But my mother-in-law (who is a preschool teacher in another city) says they have no choice--the school says they simply don't have the money to stock Kleenex for them anymore, so either the parents buy it or the teacher buys it all herself.
Try toilet paper jinx, not quite so effective at getting the icky bits off, but much less uncomfortable.
LOL. Really.
Working with a viral upper respiratory infection.
Among other things, our list included two boxes of Kleenex, two tubes of Wet Ones, and a box of quart-size Ziplock baggies with EZ sliders.
We get the same thing here. I think it's mildly annoying, but it doesn't bother me that much because I know they're needed and will get used. I mostly get worked up over the unused stuff, or things that seem like conformity for the sake of conformity.
No school lists here, thankfully.
Clod, you could try using the bigger backpack to "protect" the small backpack as a plan B -putting the small one inside the big one.
Oh monster. That's clever idea.
Damn, you're good, monster. That's a fantastic idea.
thanks :o ...it might work... I think... -he could also keep small/precious things separate in the little one
Rotten luck all, peeps.
My "back in the day" story - my parents could barely afford to send me to grammar school (age 12-16 state school you passed an exam to get into) because of the uniform and other requirements. I think my hockey boots cost half a week's salary. When you're paid weekly that's a huge deal.
And the school-specific duffle coat that I was forced to wear for three winters because is cost so much and I refused to grow. Let's not even mention the fact that the games sweater (jersey, I think?) had to be HAND-KNITTED in school colours! And I knew a girl who had hers machine-knitted (which was a cool machine in the 80s) and despite using the right wool, hers was a totally different colour and was SO noticeable.
Anyway.
Just saying.
Much as I'm a big follower of rules...
What a bunch of cocks.
How horrible that you have to start from scratch. Monster's plan is a good one, but if this is a school that is aware of your son's particular issues (sorry, I don't always keep up) then a stiff letter is advised.
Here's to you and your chap dealing with this.
My upset tonight is just Mum.
Nope, no criticism. Not even a veiled one.
She's so unhappy.
They're house-sitting, Dad didn't want to do it. Much as I adore him as a father, he can be a shit as a husband. He's drinking heavily (yes, it's a family trait) and not helping Mum at all. He had a bad fall - Mum had to get the gardeners to help him up - and is milking it it for all it's worth.
I mean, that's pretty damned scary in itself - my Dad fell and needed two young men to get him back on his feet. He wasn't drunk at that point, but it obviously scared the hell out of both of them - Dad's reaction being getting drunk every night now. Getting through a bottle of spirits a day Mum says (although to be completely fair, she does exaggerate.) HE thinks it's okay because it's white spirits not whisky! And yet Mum, who can have a scalpel for a tongue when she wants, and regularly berates him for his deafness (!) doesn't seem to be able to address his drinking.
God, I thought we were so normal.
Or at least I thought they were.
We're like something off Jeremy Kyle.
Monster's plan is a good one, but if this is a school that is aware of your son's particular issues (sorry, I don't always keep up) then a stiff letter is advised.
Oh, worse than that--this is a teacher who only teaches the preschool disabilities class. 75% of her students are autistic, and the others certainly have some ritualistic tendencies peculiar to their own conditions. But like I said, the request for a full-size backpack is a completely valid one. It's just that she didn't bother to send the list out until a week and a half before school starts.
Anyway, at this point I've gotten the bigger one (a slightly different design, but still
Cars-themed) and sneakily replaced his social story with another copy containing the updated photo. Both backpacks are still hiding in the closet until I can see how he reacts to the new picture.
I'm sure it'll be fine, one way or another. I'm mostly freaking out about everything because I'm about to have to put my kid in someone else's hands for 4 hours a day, and that's kind of terrifying.
I followed the schoolbus on Hebe's first day and cried all the way for no apparent reason -and she'd already been to preschool for 4 years....
it might not all be fine, initially, but it will get there, eventually, and sooner rather than later, I suspect, with all the careful planning and thought you've given it. There's no point telling you not to panic or be terrified, but there's every point in reminding you how awesome you are in the parenting field. :)
It's just that she didn't bother to send the list out until a week and a half before school starts.
You might point that out to her for future reference, she might not have thought of that as being a problem.
There's no point telling you not to panic or be terrified, but there's every point in reminding you how awesome you are in the parenting field. :)
A big second on that. :thumb:
Again I am late . . . thirded for sure. It'll all work out just fine.
After an extensive drought, it has rained every fucking day since I started my vacation last Friday. New motorcycle under the carport.
My sister called last night to tell me that my Mom's cancer is getting worse and they cannot put her back on chemo. She's gotten too frail. They give her ~3 mo.
Fuck Cancer.
My sister took Dad on vacation with her, he had 5 "episodes" yesterday... FUCK Alzheimers!
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCK CANCER!
So sorry to hear that dar... :(
Oh dar, and Griff - that's crap.
I'm finding that the older I get the more I am aware that everyone bears a burden of tragedy and sorrow in their life. It is so hard to face the aging and decline of one's parents ...
There may be good news coming on the Dad front. The follow-up after the emergency room with the neurologist is throwing doubt on the Altzheimer's diagnosis. I was pushing for a second opinion which he was going to get in September this may be a blessing in disguise.
Hoping and praying for you and your dad.
Alzheimers killed my Dad... 4 years before his body died. :(
Thanks guys, I appreciate it.
Mum again :(
But differently and less selfishly than usual.
She was SO down yesterday.
I know she had a rotten time with Dads when they were away.
I know he can drink too much, spend too much and be a selfish git.
But Mum usually gives more than as good as she gets (in a rare, intimate conversation, Dad said he drinks to deal with her).
But yesterday she was just hurt and bewildered.
It wasn't in response to anything done or said - and she admitted that.
She just felt tearful and down.
Mum NEVER cries. She was the one who taught me that tears are overly-dramatic and should never be indulged. The reason I didn't cry at Nanny's funeral was because Mum stood next to me not crying and I couldn't let the side down - something that was noted and praised (then again, I only wanted to cry from self-pity - I was imagining my own funeral)
One of the reasons I've brought my issues with Mum here rather than addressing them with her is that I know she's her own person, with her own problems, and never ever meant to hurt or damage me in any way.
It's horrible to see her like this.
I did what I could yesterday. Mum's more about practical gestures than words.
I prepared the vegetables for tea (something she has no issue with, but as gestures go it was there to be done)
I sat in the kitchen and talked to her during the rest of prep, putting on Come Dine With Me, something she only watches with me but loves, especially because we bitch about the contestants.
Dad and I always clear when Mum has cooked, but I brought her a cup of tea too.
Today I heard her worry that she hadn't changed Grandad's bedding, so I went over to do that (10 minute, sweaty job, but I know she'll appreciate the thought).
I don't know. She has a lot of external stresses. Auntie Alice's house sale STILL isn't resolved. I talked her into going to the Doctors but they cancelled the appointment due to illness. So she isn't sleeping and is worrying far too much. Her Uncle is close to death, and although I don't know him, he is Mum's last link with her mother. And their mortgage is coming to term, with the worry that the endowment won't cover it. Lots of things.
I bitch about her, but I love her.
It's small beer compared to other people's problems.
I just wanted to get it out of my head.
Lightning came in my house last night.
Victims: Big screen tv, dvd player, 300 watt stereo amp, VCR, Playstation, and small BR tv. Fuck.
At least it spared my computer.
That sucks, at least your house didn't burn down. Sorry to hear it.
Lightning came in my house last night.
Victims: Big screen tv, dvd player, 300 watt stereo amp, VCR, Playstation, and small BR tv. Fuck.
At least it spared my computer.
:eek:
So how did it happen? How did it get in?
and I am glad you are all ok.
I followed the schoolbus on Hebe's first day and cried all the way for no apparent reason -and she'd already been to preschool for 4 years....
sweet
My sister took Dad on vacation with her, he had 5 "episodes" yesterday... FUCK Alzheimers!
What does an episode look like? We are thinking my mom has Alzheimers but the doctor won't tell us kids anything.
T The follow-up after the emergency room with the neurologist is throwing doubt on the Altzheimer's diagnosis.
Why is that?
Alzheimers killed my Dad... 4 years before his body died. :(
I'm sorry
I miss my mom the way she could be too. :(
So how did it happen? How did it get in?
and I am glad you are all ok.
TV cable lines.
*hugs Monster very carefully*
Oh honey. You have my sympathy. Any idea what's triggered it? Or is it just one of those unpredictable ones?
What's upsetting me is I sent myself off on a trip down memory lane. Almost wilfully. Why do I do that? It's like messing with a sore tooth. You notice it and instead of thinking 'oww that's sore' and then leaving it the fuck alone you probe around with tongue until it really hurts.
late august is always nasty, so i'm guessing seasonal allergies, but what exactly ... no idea. i know the humidy helpeth not, though....
What's upsetting me is I sent myself off on a trip down memory lane. Almost wilfully. Why do I do that? It's like messing with a sore tooth. You notice it and instead of thinking 'oww that's sore' and then leaving it the fuck alone you probe around with tongue until it really hurts.
That sure sucks, doesn't it? I hate it when I do that too. I always end smoking, and I don't even like doing it. I know I'm weird. :neutral:
Dealing with a psycho, lying ex who is a money-grubbing piece of crap. Nothing is ever her fault, not the lying, cheating, stealing money from her own children, the forgery, drinking/drug ABUSE, not even her trying to impersonate someone else to takle out a loan in their name.
Dealing with a psycho, lying ex who is a money-grubbing piece of crap. Nothing is ever her fault, not the lying, cheating, stealing money from her own children, the forgery, drinking/drug ABUSE, not even her trying to impersonate someone else to takle out a loan in their name.
I'm sorry classic, you have to keep your strength up. Take a break, count to 10, break a few (inexpensive) things, and then get back in the game. We're all on your side.
Thanks mtp - I'm not giving in nor giving up. I am in this game for every play!
Just had to get all that resentment O-U-T. Some people never change - its really sad. Thats partly what upsets me so much.
Sounds like a dry drunk, classic.
Grrrr, keep fightin' dude!
The phrase "dry drunk" has two significant words for the alcoholic. "Dry" refers to the abstinence from drinking, whereas "drunk" signifies a deeply pathological condition resulting from the use of alcohol in the past. Taken together these words suggest intoxication without alcohol. Since intoxication comes from the Greek word for poison, "dry drunk" implies a state of mind and a mode of behavior that are poisonous to the alcoholic's well being.
OBVIOUS TRAITS Persons experiencing a full-blown DRY DRUNK are, for that period, removed from the world of sobriety; they fail, for whatever reason, to accept the necessary conditions for sober living. Their mental and emotional homes are chaotic, their approach to everyday living is unrealistic, and their behavior, both verbal and physical, is unacceptable.
This lack of sober realism manifests itself in many ways.
1. Grandiosity, put very simply, is an exaggeration of one's own importance. This can be demonstrated either in terms of one's strengths or weaknesses. In either case it is blatantly self- seeking or self-serving, putting oneself at the center of attention, from the "big me" who has ask the answers to the "poor me" whose cup of self-pity runneth over and wants all of our attention.
2. Judgmentalism is mutually related to grandiosity. It means that the alcoholic is prone to make value judgments - strikingly inappropriate evaluations - usually in terms of "goodness" or "badness".
http://www.minnesotarecovery.info/literature/drydrunk.htm1. Grandiosity, put very simply, is an exaggeration of one's own importance.
strikingly inappropriate evaluations
Intolerance leaves no room for delaying the gratification of personal desires. This is accomplished by gross confusion of priorities
HA HA HA HA!
I wanted to take the sprogs to Cedar point today because it was cheap, but the forecast for Sandusky was shite so we didn't go. It has been raining here ALL day, but it was just fine there. grrr.
Jebus Cripes fuckity fuck fuck...
Capital One freaking SUCKS..SUCKS SUCKS.
Is there anything, ANYTHING, at all, where one can process business without getting fucked?
... not with that company, apparently. What happened?
Oh bah...everything I touch...
Anyhoo, I paid it off, like I always do, and they're sitting around on the funds (because you know, it takes electronics 500 days to clear, though my bank AND the C1 website show I paid the balance off...I guess they use Pony Freaking Express) and so I tried to order some floor mats for my car and they said my card was declined. So I call and get all kinds of options, none of which were helpful, but they confirmed 1) My huge payment and 2) I had no available credit.
WTF?
Anyway, it's resolved. grrrrrrrrr
it's rained all fucking day here and I'm pre-fucking-menstrual. TMI? tough!
Hahahah, I'm just coming off that pre-f-m slope. SUCKS, don't it? ;)
aand the grilled cheese I just made to comfort myself is nasty
Pilau got into a fight with a dog in the woods today. No serious injuries, but his ear's torn up. Got bloody tooth holes in it. Bled like a mother fucker. *shakes head* So now he reeks of teatree oil and is feeling sorry for himself.
That sweet doggie got into a doggie fight? Naw...
;)
heheheh yeah....sweet...sweet and slightly psychotic :P
Not sure which of them started it. One minute it's friendly sniffs the next thing an explosion of doggy rage. Dog fights are so damned dramatic. All teeth and up on their back legs. T'other dog seemed unhurt. I doubt it was attempting to do a whole lot of damage to Pil. Most dog fights aren't really about doing damage, they're more about establishing dominance. But those flappy ears of his are such an easy biting target. be difficult not to bite them with all that jaw clashing. In fact I suspect that the other dog wasn't actually trying to bite the ear so much as the ear went into a closing jaw. Would have been more of a rip otherwise I think. Had to drag Pil away by his fur to stop him going after the dog once the owner had got him away. For such a clever dog he really can be a stupid little sod.
I bet the other dog was a capitalist.
I bet the other dog was a capitalist.
snork
My baby girl's been having some unexplained diarrhea, and tonight among the latest explosion was a very small wood chip.
I am concerned that it may be only part of a larger ingested item.
My baby girl's been having some unexplained diarrhea, and tonight among the latest explosion was a very small wood chip.
I am concerned that it may be only part of a larger ingested item.
Sounds like playground mulch. Would explain the diarrhea too.
Yabbut all our playgrounds have gravel.
I mean yeah, she definitely ate some wood at some point, my only problem is how big is the piece and is it too stuck to be eliminated with diarrhea?
can you post a photo of the chip? then we can try to ID the species and you might have a clue where to look for the rest of it.
You say that like I would have any idea where to look for a certain species of tree after you identified it... I don't know from plant life; I hated biology.
I've had a cold for a few days now...that's annoying and all but manageable.Today I have developed a cough for no reason...there's no phlegm, nothing in me to be coughing about AND YET I AM COUGHING. argh
Clod, try the GFCFWF diet. :bolt:
Razz, have you ever been diagnosed with athsma? That dry cough sounds like it.
In my totally personal-anecdote, no-qualifications view, this kind of asthma is at least partly postural - make sure you are sitting/lying straight and exhale from the bottom of your lungs first - the cough may be your body trying to squeeze the air out after it has been trapped by having the middle sections deflate first.
What's upsetting me is I sent myself off on a trip down memory lane. Almost wilfully. Why do I do that? It's like messing with a sore tooth. You notice it and instead of thinking 'oww that's sore' and then leaving it the fuck alone you probe around with tongue until it really hurts.
I read that... don't go there, ever.:headshake
I've had a cold for a few days now...that's annoying and all but manageable.Today I have developed a cough for no reason...there's no phlegm, nothing in me to be coughing about AND YET I AM COUGHING. argh
RUUUUUUN Razz has the swine flu, we're all going to DIIIIIIIIIE
You say that like I would have any idea where to look for a certain species of tree after you identified it... I don't know from plant life; I hated biology.
First there's this post:
http://cellar.org/showpost.php?p=589662&postcount=17
wherein mulch is mentioned as traveling and persisting in the environment...
then there is this photo with items that look suspiciously mulch-like.
:lol: he's got you banged to rights there, clod
HA HA HA AHaaaaaaaaaa
Excellent F3!
RUUUUUUN Razz has the swine flu, we're all going to DIIIIIIIIIE
Probably the whooping cough that is going around actually...
I started this thread, and now hate to look at it--some of the things have been too awful!
:lol: Very nice, foot.
However, you may note that I met up with Flint and Pooka on the 3rd of August, and she pooped wood on the 26th of August. I'm really certain she doesn't take 3 weeks to poop.* However, perhaps a sliver got stuck in the tread of someone's shoe, and she picked it out of that.
*[COLOR="LemonChiffon"]How am I certain? Because she is usually constipated, and we regularly feed her "marker" foods like corn, so we know how long things are taking to pass through her. Always has to be less than 36 hours (ideally less than 24,) or she gets a sprinkle of magnesium citrate.[/COLOR]
*[COLOR="LemonChiffon"]How am I certain? Because she is usually constipated, and we regularly feed her "marker" foods like corn, so we know how long things are taking to pass through her. Always has to be less than 36 hours (ideally less than 24,) or she gets a sprinkle of magnesium citrate.[/COLOR]
We just use RFID tags. [COLOR="LemonChiffon"]. . . LemonChiffon ???[/COLOR]
. . . LemonChiffon ???
I dunno, it was one of the whitish squares in the color choice window. My laptop doesn't have the greatest color differentiation, and I wasn't paying close attention.
Fucking , fuckers , just FUCK !!!!!!!!!
what, now? in front of the children?
what's up, zipper?
Fucken work ,
Fucken boss ,
Fucken Customers ,
my fucken back !!!!
Just FUCK !!!!!! In general
I thought you liked your work :( You have my sympathy about your back. although I don'trecommend fucking when one has a bad back
I DO like my work , but I would Like winning the Powerball Better !!
Fucken work ,
Fucken boss ,
Fucken Customers ,
my fucken back !!!!
Just FUCK !!!!!! In general
mind if I punch you in the back?? don't make me fly up there to show a marine an attitude adjustment!! :D
Ex-marine. Guy is allowed to grumble a bit isn't he? And from some of the stories he has told us in the past, some of his clients are dumb buggers... " ... oooh, you have to plug it in?" kind of dumb.
Ex-marine. Guy is allowed to grumble a bit isn't he? And from some of the stories he has told us in the past, some of his clients are dumb buggers... " ... oooh, you have to plug it in?" kind of dumb.
kiss off i'm good friends with chis and am allowed
of course i say that in a joking way zen......don't get bent....
but I LIKE getting bent... in some ways.
No harm taken or intended, group hug, Kumbaya, etc etc.
lol! yeah, sometimes it's fun, no doubt
Bring it Fly Boy !!!!!!
And yes Zen some (EX??)customers are Part of the problem .
Oh and Zen , its former Marine .
as they say at graduation " A marine you are Now , and a Marine you WILL ever be !!"
here's a little something. chris flying my geronimo in '05....
oh, yeah, note the cellar tshirt
i'm bringing it you ex-f-in-marinade uh i mean marine...
k we have enough to chat.....lessgo
Oh and Zen , its former Marine .
as they say at graduation " A marine you are Now , and a Marine you WILL ever be !!"
ZippyT has just corrected my language usage.
:yelsick:
I'm going to have to go upstairs with a revolver now, I think.
Goodbye all.
Product Placement is every thing dude !!
No worrys Zen , Id drink a beer with ya dude
okay but no playing with the .22 mag, okay?
[COLOR="Wheat"]I'll bring the, um, herbs.[/COLOR]
ZippyT has just corrected my language usage.
:yelsick:
.
:rotflol::rotflol:
OMFG that's the funniest thing i've read on here for a while. poor baby. :lol2:
Remember a long time ago I had to cancel all those loans, and I was so upset about it?
Guess what? The Bursar's office has sent final notices to those students and NOW THEY GET THEIR FUCKING MAIL?!?! I dug through files, checked multiple sources, re-sent every bit of returned mail to at least one alternate address, but NOW they get their fucking mail?
I'm getting no support from the uppers, one of whom was in charge of the program when the whole fiasco of a problem was made, way before I was here.
I won't talk to them today. I fear I'll say something to get me fired.
I don't understand, why are they only getting their mail just now?
They're not. They choose to only "get" their mail when the notice from the Cashier's office tells them they have a balance due.
It happened at my old job too. They ignore all the warnings and requests for information, then when they get a notice from the actual MONEY people, they're like "Huh, what?"
And it's WAY too late to reverse it now. As I stated would happen, in BIG BOLD LETTERS, in my multiple letters.
:headshake
sounds like they need some skunk snot delivered via airmail!
Ah. I do that with my student loan stuff too. I thought it was mandatory. can I have my skunk snot a la mode?
anyway you like it! a la mode or a la pew, it's up to you!
That's the difference. When a student is in repayment on a student loan...it's not something I have to deal with. It's between the lender (whether direct lending or by proxy) and the lendee.
This situation is between the student and the institution. I asked my boss for guidance and it was vague with a "sorry you got stuck with this."
I can handle it. I always do. I just wasn't in the mood for it today. :)
i am so sick of studying. for the past week and a half i've been taking on-line practice tests for the certified flight instructor - instrument written exam. hope to take it tomorrow but then i have to do the oral and practical with the FAA after that when i feel i'm ready. did i say already that i'm sick of studying?
time for a smoke.
I wouldn't say I'm exactly upset, but...
About a month ago, I applied for a job. The owner of the company started corresponding with me via e-mail just a few hours later. We talked back and forth, but our schedules were such that I wasn't able to interview with her in person until 2 weeks ago. The interview went great, and I appear to be the only candidate for the position. When we met in person, she was supposed to start calling my references...that was the 18th. I e-mailed her to get a status update early last Wednesday, but when I hadn't heard from her by Friday morning, I pretty much gave up on the job.
So I'm getting my car washed at my favorite spot Saturday morning...and I run into the owner! She actually saw me first...she apologized for taking so long, but that things have been terribly busy and that she hopes to call my references this week.
She told me during the interview that they are desperate for a new supervisor, but that they want to do their due diligence. And I realize that hiring processes can take time...but this is just so frustrating. All my refs know she's going to call, and it would take about an hour to call them, if that.
It doesn't help that my temp assignment ended Friday, and now I'm at home twiddling my thumbs.
What's upsetting me? Fuck dementia.
Two of my family members in California have been told by the authorities to evacuate numerous times due to the fire, but they're so friggin stubborn that they refuse to leave their houses. It's a waste of resources to have to keep knocking on their doors - They're pissing me off, but they just won't listen and refuse to budge. I hope the authorities arrest them, only problem is one of them is a cop, so he'll probably get to stay.
Why are they being assholes and threatening/risking other people's lives as well? They'll probably be first in line to sue somebody, anybody as well... GRRRR
Yeesh, you wouldn't have to tell me twice!
Aside: reminds me of this Eddie Murphy bit, years ago, talking about The Amityville Horror:
Movie be just like this: [brother's voice] "Wow, baby, this is beautiful. We got chandelier hangin' up here, kids outside playin', it's a beautiful neighborhood, I really love it - this is beaut--" [demonic whisper] "Get out!" [brother's voice] "Too bad we can't stay." [instantly spins, starts walking upstage]
Seems like every personal conversation with Mum leads to disagreement with someone else :(
Great chat today. Intimate, understanding, accepting.
Except it turns out Dad has been complaining about me to Mum.
Partly, this doesn't surprise me. In that he is even more non-confrontational than I am. He is actually in the negative range when it comes to confronting people. He would slit his own wrists (if it wasn't a sin) rather than tell someone else they had wronged him.
But it's hard to hear that you've annoyed/ upset/ angered your Dad after the fact.
I used to hate Mum for this, but these days I mostly understand where she is coming from. Why should she be the one in the middle? Why should she listen to his complaints and not pass them on?
Apparently, I have been profligate in my use of electricity.
This doesn't just hurt because it's Dad moaning (although that hurts enough)
This rankles because I am - probably - the most energy aware person in this house.
Therefore it drives me round the bend that he can have an issue with me pausing something on SkyPlus (a bit like TiVo I think) while I check something out with Mum.
Now I am living here at my parents' behest. I am damned lucky that they let me stay, and I honestly do appreciate it. Really - it was always my nightmare, my ultimate shame to have to move back here. They have made it something I can both enjoy and accept. These are good people.
BUT. It bugs me that Dads brings up things that upset both Mum (because she's in the middle) and me (who they are aimed at) and they are nonsense. I could be more energy efficient. But really - not much more. If you take reasonable energy efficiency (normal, every day) as 100%, I am 75%, Dad is about 35%.
Meh.
I need to move out.
Just annoys me a bit.
No-one likes to be judged on something the judge isn't working on themself.
Why are they being assholes and threatening/risking other people's lives as well? They'll probably be first in line to sue somebody, anybody as well... GRRRR
Luckily they're not the suing types, just stupidly stubborn sometimes. Like staying in their house will magically make the fire go around it or something...
My cousin is at the other end of the fireline, and the cops and fire crews actually asked him to stay. Perhaps because he has a huge pumper truck, and is protecting the stables surrounding his house where the stupid horse owners haven't come to evacuate their friggin horses...
Let's see, if I had fair warning that raging fire was coming, or a hurricane, or molten lava...I think it would be time for a roadtrip! Do they think there is some kind of bravery medal or something? :confused:
Wish there were that much notice for a tornado: that's what's gonna get me, a big old swirling, gobbling, tornado.
I'm pretty sure it's just a whole lotta testosterone flowing........."Watch me save my home with a garden hose" mentality.
lol...hope they catch it on film, and survive to watch the vid become viral!
Luckily they're not the suing types, just stupidly stubborn sometimes.
I'm pretty sure it's just a whole lotta testosterone flowing........."Watch me save my home with a garden hose" mentality.
Sorry - I was speaking in general terms not really specific to your family.
No worries. You're right though, that would be the mentality of most Angelenos - If I lose something, there must be someone I can sue.....
Yeesh, you wouldn't have to tell me twice!
Aside: reminds me of this Eddie Murphy bit, years ago, talking about The Amityville Horror:
I know I am an ass but I thought it was about Poltergeist?! Didn't the TV say GET OUT?
I took that quote directly from an SNL opening monologue transcript. That transcript mentioned both Poltergeist and Amityville. I had remembered him using Amityville in a stand-up I had seen. So, you are right, and so am I. :)
Here's the link to the transcript:
http://snltranscripts.jt.org/82/82imono.phtmlToday, upsetting me: human trash.
Today, upsetting me: human trash.
Well take the trash out.
Figuratively speaking, of course. Then again if they are hobo's... all bets are off.
Today, upsetting me: human trash.
It's not nice to talk about undergraduates like that.
Not ALL undergraduates. ;)
Truth is a defence against accusation of slander.
Unfortunately, trash is hard to prove. Too haphazard.
Unfortunately, trash is hard to prove. Too haphazard.
Just call for a biohazard clean up crew.
no she needs a haphazard clean-up crew. like the A-team. or something
You got one? An A-team, I mean? Will I need Material Safety Data Sheets? Will the the "team" be clearly labeled?
Mr. T as done by Eddie Murphy:
"Slow down, boy... you gone fuck up and cum too quick. I'll squench up the cheeks of my butt and rip your dick off".
I rear-ended someone yesterday. I was behind them makin' a right turn, I saw them turn, so I looked back at the oncoming traffic to ensure I had time to go, I did, so I went...then I hit the car in front of me which had stopped in the middle of turning. Awesomeness. Then we had to wait around for the cops because they refused to give me their insurance information. Even though the cop told them I would have to have that information, they still refused, so now I have to wait to get it with the police report to get their insurance. Sucks for them because that all that much longer they have to wait for a settlement.
Today I missed my alarm and was 30min late to work.
MTP: :comfort:
I wonder why they wouldn't give their info. Strange.
Say ... you weren't ... texting ... were you? :bolt:
MTP: :comfort:
I wonder why they wouldn't give their info. Strange.
Say ... you weren't ... texting ... were you? :bolt:
No devil's advocate, I was paying attention...just to the wrong cars apparently. :(
My mom suggested they wouldn't give me their info because I'm a white girl, she's serious. Why do people first think racial issues are the problem? They just didn't want me to call their insurance and file a claim against them claiming the issue was their fault. TX law is that its mine, but I was being obstinate and not discussing that with them. Since they wouldn't give their info over though, we will have to go through the insurance company (mine) which will cost us BOTH more. Although I'll be payin for the damage, he will still get a no-fault accident put on his driving record and will therefore lose potential discounts.
I would suspect the other guy was uninsured.
I would suspect the other guy was uninsured.
We did too, but they handed over their insurance to the cop when she arrived. So they were just being silly and didn't want to give it to me.
"When I was a kid" speech. . ..
We were expected to show up to school with notebook paper (preferably in a notebook) and/or spiral notebooks, along with some pens and pencils. There was no such thing as a "school supply list." If we needed something particular, the teacher would say so at the time. ("OK, next week we're going to start on geometry. Everybody needs to get a protractor." etc.)
Now we get extensive, detailed lists. (3 1-inch thick binders and 1 3-inch binder.) To add insult to injury, in some cases stuff that was on the list was never used! (4x6" post-it notes??? We couldn't find any--we "made do" with 3.5x5" and then they never used them.)
I'm convinced Staples is paying off teachers.
The thing that irritates me is when they use parents to cover their janitorial supply budget. Among other things, our list included two boxes of Kleenex, two tubes of Wet Ones, and a box of quart-size Ziplock baggies with EZ sliders. But my mother-in-law (who is a preschool teacher in another city) says they have no choice--the school says they simply don't have the money to stock Kleenex for them anymore, so either the parents buy it or the teacher buys it all herself.
Yesterday was the first day of school. We sent the kids off with all their tons of stupid required supplies. Last night, talking at length about how their day went, our daughter mentioned that about half of the supplies we bought for her were dumped into a communal bin. We got her a nice protractor. Not expensive, but a color she liked. She had labeled it with her name. Into the communal bin it went. Same with the scissors, the 6 boxes of sharpened pencils, etc. etc.
What if we teach her not to be wasteful with her supplies, when the kid in the corner who gets crayons stuck in his nose is constantly breaking pencils? He doesn't care. There are more in the communal bin. We are paying for his pencil breaking habit.
It's a little microcosm of capitalism vs. communism/socialism right there in the school. We're providing pencil welfare and promoting waste.
Oh, and last year, we had to provide something like ten glue sticks. They went into the communal bin too. And then in March or so, we had to provide something like 4 more, because so many of them had dried up from sitting in the communal bin with their caps off. If our kid had her own supply of glue sticks, she would use one until it was gone and then pull out a new one. None would dry out.
We did/are experiencing the exact same thing. Lil Lookout had to have 84 presharpened pencils to turn in. 23 kids x 84 = 1,932 pencils. That's kind of a lot of pencils. On top of that Lil Lookout likes "fun pencils" so he takes his own $.25 in every Tuesday and buys a fun pencil for the librarian. He'll never even use any of those 84 pencils.
Of course we had to send in cleaning supplies and hand sanitizer and all that stuff too. The weird thing is I had to make out a $20 check to the teacher for "additional supplies". I know teachers are underpaid and I absolutely don't want her spending her personal money for classroom supplies... but it just feels weird.
car towed to dealer this morning. leak in roof.
bah!
Hopefully those are unrelated or you have some 'splaining to do.
we teach her not to be wasteful with her supplies
It's a little microcosm of capitalism vs. communism/socialism right there in the school. We're providing pencil welfare and promoting waste.
Obviously a wasted effort. I call Bullshit! At my kids school they are all responsible for their own supplies. If they lose something or use it up each kid has to replace it. We are not, nor should we be a communal society.
More of the entitlement mentality - It's ok, use waste whatever.... someone else will GIVE ME more. Fuck that!
no; unrelated but concomitant
con,con,concom... are youcalling me a communist?!? freaking hippies...
:3_eyes:
simultaneous then, ya doof!
...but don't we all try to teach our kids to share nicely with their friends too?
I think it's downright digraceful to insist parents provide their children with these provisions then confiscate them for the communal bin. That's not communism, it's a racket to make up for funding deficits.
I wonder if they do it knowing that only half the kids will actually bring stuff...
Honestly it doesn't really bother me with pencils and stuff like that. If there is a kid in class who eats his pencils then I want to make sure he has plenty to eat. I'm a giver like that.
Compass and protractor though? Hell, no. I've instructed Lil Lookout to stand on his desk and declare "I'm a conservative! You can only take what is mine if you are bigger, stronger, and have more friends than I do!"
Honestly it doesn't really bother me with pencils and stuff like that. If there is a kid in class who eats his pencils then I want to make sure he has plenty to eat. I'm a giver like that.
Compass and protractor though? Hell, no. I've instructed Lil Lookout to stand on his desk and declare "I'm a conservative! You can only take what is mine if you are bigger, stronger, and have more friends than I do!"
bastard. I just choked on my tea lol
I think they may indeed be expecting some kids not to turn up with stuff, in which case the school should have a small supply ready from which those children can use (labelled as school property in the case of compass and other more expensive/larger items, and uniformly the same in the case of pens and pencils.) A note to their parents or a word when they come pick them up would hopefully have them bringing their own.
If these are state schools that parents are already paying for their children's school through taxes. Covertly making them pick up the slack is dishonest. I bet they could even invite parents to send their kids in with their full kit and a'donated item' for the class box for use as spares. That at least would be honest and the kids would have the lovely experience of contributing to their class (building a sense of camaraderie, ownership and class responsibility) without actually stealing
their stuff.).
What's upsetting me today...well actually upsetting is probably the wrong word. Just winding me up and making me feel uncomfortable. Eczema flare. 70% coverage . Hot hot.
Eh, this is just a primer on taxation.
When it could be a lovely lesson on sharing :P
nooo, sharing is deciding what to share, with who, when to share it, and in what amount all of my own free will.
taxation is being coerced, however politely, into giving something with no control over the other factors.
each has a proper place, let's just not mix them up. :)
But that was my point :P Instead of taking the opportunity to give them a lesson insharing (asking parents to supply their children's kit and inviting them to also bring in a donated item for the class tub) They chose to tax them instead. except no they didn't. Tax would have been if they'd taken one or two things off everybody and let them keep the rest.
They demonstrated highway robbery:)
What it's really demonstrating is FUCKING STUPIDITY. 84 pencils??!?!?! Eighty Fucking Four?!?!?!? Even if we stipulate that the best way to operate is a communal stash to which everyone contributes, why 84? Why not 75? Or 90, which perhaps makes numerical sense for a 180-day school year? Besides, who decided you had to buy all your supplies for the whole damned year at once?
In addition to the values of communism, it's also teaching the values of conformity. Why should your daughter have a "special" protractor? Or your son a "fun" pencil? They can damned well use a random one out of the bin like everyfuckingbody else. I'm surprised they didn't mandate specific brands, sizes, and colors in order to maintain the proper decorum amongst the classroom. Some years they've asked our kids to buy specific color notebooks and/or folders... I understand it's so they can say... OK, all math stuff goes in your yellow notebook... then for math everybody can just pull out their yellow notebook. But goddamn people, if it gives the kids just a small shred of pleasure during the school day to have a notebook with a puppy, or a baseball player, or a movie star on it.... do you really think your little automatons can't remember which one is the Hannah Montana notebook and which one is the Zack & Cody one???!?!
AARRRHGHGH don't get me started. "What Not To Wear" already came damned close to get me spewing off about mindless conformity in contemporary American society. But I was too damned lazy to put it all down.
I'm sorry. I'm off my meds today, and I spent an hour at Staples last night getting the graph paper Miss Dallas needed for her algebra homework. (Apparently high school supply requirements are less numerous, but given with less advance notice.) I could write more, but I'm getting incoherent and tangential and etc. etc. blah blah.
It doesn't actually teach the values of communism. It teaches them about power and authority. When they walk into that classroom the teacher is king/queen. S/he decides who uses what and when. It is however very stupid.
awesome. power and authority are such a turn on.
Yesterday was the first day of school. We sent the kids off with all their tons of stupid required supplies. Last night, talking at length about how their day went, our daughter mentioned that about half of the supplies we bought for her were dumped into a communal bin. We got her a nice protractor. Not expensive, but a color she liked. She had labeled it with her name. Into the communal bin it went. Same with the scissors, the 6 boxes of sharpened pencils, etc. etc.
What if we teach her not to be wasteful with her supplies, when the kid in the corner who gets crayons stuck in his nose is constantly breaking pencils? He doesn't care. There are more in the communal bin. We are paying for his pencil breaking habit.
It's a little microcosm of capitalism vs. communism/socialism right there in the school. We're providing pencil welfare and promoting waste.
Oh, and last year, we had to provide something like ten glue sticks. They went into the communal bin too. And then in March or so, we had to provide something like 4 more, because so many of them had dried up from sitting in the communal bin with their caps off. If our kid had her own supply of glue sticks, she would use one until it was gone and then pull out a new one. None would dry out.
Have you said something about it? to the principal?
we're at a hippie/socialist (state) school and there are no lists of stuff to bring. If a classroom is short a particular item, the teacher requests and someone provides. usually too many someones and they all come home with a spare gluestick with which to cause mischief..... bless them....
but we'd sure as hell say something if there were constant requests because the items we were donating were being abused....
When it could be a lovely lesson on sharing :P
Yeah, every god damned germ that comes to school.
I have some socialist leanings, but I'm also one for schoolds teaching indivudual responsibility.
That stationery policy strikes me as bloody stupid.
And how many goddamn pencils does a kid need????
I have some socialist leanings, but I'm also one for schoolds teaching indivudual responsibility.
That stationery policy strikes me as bloody stupid.
And how many goddamn pencils does a kid need????
Zen, you've not being paying attention. A kid needs 84 pencils.
I have some socialist leanings, but I'm also one for schoolds teaching indivudual responsibility.
That stationery policy strikes me as bloody stupid.
And how many goddamn pencils does a kid need????
Snap.
Socialism does not have to equal waste and stupidity.
But it does in this case.
For me, I'm really down about my on-going migraine situaion.
This one has been going on since Sunday evening.
I've been unable to type on the days I've not been here.
Yesterday was particularly bad.
I have not had a single piece of solid food all week, half the water I drink comes back up again, and the precription painkillers I've been given only handle 75% of the pain.
Aside from the worry that it's not actually a migraine (4 DAYS?!) and in fact I am about to die of something, I'm worried about our Big Day Out on Monday. I'm terrified of letting Mum down, promising her the earth and not delivering. I'm going to call the doctors tomorrow and ask for a telephone consultation just to be on the safe side, because we're scheduled to leave at 09.30 Monday morning, so it's kill or cure over the weekend.
Zen, you've not being paying attention. A kid needs 84 pencils.
:smack: :lol: touche'!
Sundae: :comfort: yeah, like actually :comfort: only carefully and gently.
A kid needs to bring 84 pencils because that dipshit Jethro Redneck takes his pencil home every day and leaves it there, and comes to school without supplies. But the teacher is not at liberty to let him fail for his dipshittedness, because No Child Left Behind says her pay and her job are directly tied to whether Jethro can pass, which he needs a neverending supply of new pencils to do.
As usual, Clod: :notworthy
SG...do you think your migraines are stress-related? Do you have a history of migraines? Sending you well wishes: hope you feel better.
I was all ready to defend teachers buying supplies for their students until I read the 'communal bin' Do all teachers do this at that school? Is the administration aware of it? I would feel ok about a communal bin if the parents were made aware of it AND the kids allowed to keep their own things. I would be making some phone calls. I am annoyed for you.
lol @ monster.
Sundae I hope you feel better soon!
I'm going to call the doctors tomorrow and ask for a telephone consultation just to be on the safe side, because we're scheduled to leave at 09.30 Monday morning, so it's kill or cure over the weekend.
Can't you get an emergency appointment? Sometimes you need to be less British :lol: Four days is a long time, i hope you get it sorted soon
Do all teachers do this at that school? Is the administration aware of it?
I'm sure the administration knows.
It's a great school otherwise, with great teachers, and does it really make sense to get yourself labeled as one of "those" difficult parents as the school year is just beginning? We're trying to build good relationships with the teachers for our kids sake, and don't want to rock the boat at the very beginning. It's just not worth it. But I'm happy to bitch about it here.
I've been trying to kick away a depression, but it hit me hard today. I can't make mysekf do the things I need to do. So another day and then another week goes by without them getting done and I sink further. I do some of my work stuff (council). But this summer I wanted/needed to get some serious research done: I've done a few little bits. Some preparatory reading: I've read a handful of articles and a couple of chapters, sporadically without really taking detailed notes. My house, is in a state. Has been for like a year. I can't seem to make myself get started on clearing it, and bagging up shit to dump. At best I can force myself every so often to wash up and chivvy the place a little. But I am sinking under the junk. Mum offers to help (of course) but I don't want her to. I want to do it myself I just can't find the motivation to start.
I keep waking up and not wanting to get up come day time. I manage to force myself out of bed by thinking about checking responses on here and the Big Finish forum. I then can't make myself pull away and do anything else. The idea of doing anything else just brings to mind the ever growing list of other stuff, I feel exhausted and can;t face it.
My eczema is flared and that's making me ratty. hair trigger temper. Then I lose my rag with Pilau and feel guilty. I suspect it's partly hormonal because I don't usually feel this bad. Today I just have this constant want to cry feeling.
I am broke. totally broke. I owe my landlord most of my first scholarship payment (due 1st Oct). So every time i think about doing the house I get this sinking feeling of guilt and insecurity.
I know at some point soon the money Dad left me wil come through. But my hopes for a Summer research trip to kickstart the project have not happened. Every month it's been 'due in about 6 weeks.'. I have lost hope of getting the research trip done this side of Christmas. There's stuff I can research in the meantime, but I keep coming up against a wall on the courts martial records: each time I find a deserter, his regiments records are held at Kew gardens and aren't digitised. I can't afford to go to Kew gardens.
I'll probably be feeling much better later. That's usually how it works. I know this isn't for ever. But just today I have had enough.
I was all ready to defend teachers buying supplies for their students until I read the 'communal bin' Do all teachers do this at that school? Is the administration aware of it? I would feel ok about a communal bin if the parents were made aware of it AND the kids allowed to keep their own things. I would be making some phone calls. I am annoyed for you.
lol @ monster.
Sundae I hope you feel better soon!
The communal bin thing is pretty common, I think. Especially in cities. For example, this was the list for my son, last year when we lived in a suburb of Denver. Notice they ask for 2 spiral notebooks with 90 pages. At the end of the year, he came back with one spiral notebook (not one I bought) half full. Where did the other notebook go? Most of this stuff was dumped in a communal bin, never to be seen again:
GRADE 2
1 small pointed scissors (Fiskars)
12 glue sticks
48 Sanford America #2 pencils, sharpened
2 big pink erasers
1 water color paint set
1 large box of tissues
1 box Crayola crayons(48)
4 bottom pocket folders (with 3 brads)
(one each red, blue, yellow, & green)
1 box colored pencils (24 sharpened)
1 3-ring notebook (1” rings)
2 spiral notebooks (90 pages wide-lined)
1 supply box- (cigar box size)
BOYS – 1 container of disinfectant cleaning
wipes
GIRLS – 1 ream of white paper
Please choose 1 of the following items to send with your child:
1 - box of gallon size self sealing plastic
bags
1- box of dry erase markers
1 - anti-bacterial hand soap
Now that we live in a small town much further North, my son goes to a different school. Here was his list for this year. I managed to spend less than 30.00 on supplies this year. To my surprise, none of his stuff got dumped into a bin (except the kleenex and ziplocks). The teacher just asked them to put all their supplies in their desks:
Third Grade Students:
48 pencils (non-mechanical) marked with name
2 large boxes of Kleenex
1 box of 24 crayons (minimum)
1 set of 8 colored pencils (minimum)
1 ruler with inches and centimeters
1 pair scissors
2 glue sticks
1 bottle of white Elmer’s glue
1 small pencil case (small enough to fit in desk)
8 sturdy pocket folders
3 spiral notebooks – WIDE line, white, 8 ½ x 11
2 yellow highlighters
2 block style erasers – no cap erasers
1 black felt tip pen
1 set colored markers
1 four pack dry erase markers (expo brand)
Girls – 1 container antibacterial wipes
Boys – 1 box quart/sandwich size ziplock bags
Still, not quite 84 pencils. ;)
At his old school, parents were encouraged to bring in additional supplies and even food for kids who didn't have enough. I have also noticed a huge gap between the level of knowledge and responsibility expected at his new school compared to the old one. The new one has higher expectations, so he is experiencing a steep learning curve right now.
Have I said this before:
Fuck Capital One: fuckity fuck fuck fuck they are the WORST. Payment shows online...fine. Two days later my bank shows payment processed...available credit still not reflecting. If this isn't some kind of fucking way they get a few extra pennies I'll be goddammed. I'm going out of town and I don't NEED THIS SHIT.
The best-laid fucking plans of mice and fucked up corporate America bullshit.
The best-laid fucking plans of mice and fucked up corporate America bullshit.
Amen to that.
I didn't mention my bank showed cleared funds YESTERDAY. Why do I have to fight these people every single time?
Thanks for the amen, I needed that. :o
I'm so worried about getting stranded due to their incompetence, I've done everything right.
Can't you just call the bank and talk to a real person?
Have I said this before:
Fuck Capital One: fuckity fuck fuck fuck they are the WORST. Payment shows online...fine. Two days later my bank shows payment processed...available credit still not reflecting. If this isn't some kind of fucking way they get a few extra pennies I'll be goddammed. I'm going out of town and I don't NEED THIS SHIT.
The best-laid fucking plans of mice and fucked up corporate America bullshit.
Don't let them do this to you, Shawnee. Call the bank. Ask for the bank manager. Tell them how disappointed you are and that you expect him to resolve the issue. If he balks, maybe expressing a desire to document your issue for the Attorney General or the state banking commission would help.
Then they'll cancel my card without cause, as they CAN do, because I'm causing trouble and they're not making money off me because I pay my balance off completely almost every month. I can't afford that to happen right now: I'm leaving TODAY.
I sent a message via my log-in to C1, asking pretty please advise when funds will show available. I love kowtowing to the devil.
It's not my bank's fault. Last time C1 conferenced me and my bank who said "yes the funds are there." My bank is local. I know these people. C1 is corporate evil.
I've been trying to kick away a depression, but it hit me hard today. I can't make myself do the things I need to do. So another day and then another week goes by without them getting done and I sink further. ....
Oh Dana! I do know how you feel. I am overwhelmed by my mother's alarming deterioration and I've been ignoring a huge and constantly growing pile of stuff-to-do for weeks now. Today I grabbed both of the 12" high piles of paper and dealt with each bit of paper that I could deal with immediately (loads and loads of file or bin, a few phone calls and cheques to write). When I'm this desperate I don't prioritise or sort, I just traipse back and forward with each bit of paper, putting it away and then looking at the next one, which often has to be filed in the same damn place. Inefficient? yes. But otherwise I just end up shuffling the papers again ([SIZE="2"]and again[/SIZE] [SIZE="1"]and again[/SIZE]).
Start in one corner - the nearest spot. Or I'll come and help you!!!!
FINALLy talked to someone at my car dealership. They don't know what's wrong with it. After "misplacing" it yesterday, and after putting in $500 of "preventive maintenance" my nice little car which ran perfectly is now fubared, and they're "running tests."
So, yeah, I'm more than irritated. And it's coming out in my posts.
Two identical embedded systems running bit I-DEN-TI-CAL code are running... differently.
I swear I'm gonna break something.
Are all your variables initialized properly?
(I always ask this ever since I had a program in VAX Pascal I couldn't figure out. It worked fine in the debugger, but produced garbage otherwise. It turned out the debugger was automatically initializing the variables.)
Are all your variables initialized properly?
*snicker*
My very good friend's wife of 10 years and partner of 15 moved in with her boyfriend after telling him she'd been having an affair for since christmas. his 5 and 7 year old boys don't understand why mom didn't come home last night. :(
Sorry, lookout. :( At least she didn't take the kids away with her, right?
No, they'd get in the way of her party like a rockstar dreams.
My very good friend's wife of 10 years and partner of 15 moved in with her boyfriend after telling him she'd been having an affair for since christmas. his 5 and 7 year old boys don't understand why mom didn't come home last night. :(
WOW, that sucks.
My procrastination pisses me off today. I have 3 tests, all of my Spanish homework, 2 plays to read and a critique over each, all due next week. I also have to bust my ass to pack and move by Sunday. I should have done it last week.
Its rainin' outside and I swear I'm hearing a drip here IN the library, not good...
@ Limey: You're right. Starting with the nearest thing might be the way to force at least some kind of a start! Certainly, trying to pick a thing to start with and not be too concerned with the gestalt might help.
How's things with your mum this week?
@MTP: I totally get that :P
Are all your variables initialized properly?
*snicker*
:rolleyes: Yes. The verifiable fact is that I am using two identical hardware platforms.
Grumble.
:rolleyes: Yes. The verifiable fact is that I am using two identical hardware platforms.
Grumble.
Is one or both of them new? Any possibility one is not performing to spec?
Can't you just call the bank and talk to a real person?
:lol2:
To continue in English, press one.
To remain on hold indefinitely, press two.
To hear infomercials about our products, press three.
To sign up for new products, press four.
To speak to a real person, press [pi squared/ log3 + root phi]
Thank you for calling. Remember, your business is important to us and we care about your concerns.
@ Limey: You're right. Starting with the nearest thing might be the way to force at least some kind of a start! Certainly, trying to pick a thing to start with and not be too concerned with the gestalt might help.
How's things with your mum this week?
...
I'm off to look at care homes on the mainland next week - I'd rather she were nearer, but that may not be possible ... :(
Ach. Good luck honey. Hopefully you'll find something workable. Let us know how you get on.
Is one or both of them new? Any possibility one is not performing to spec?
They were purchased at the same time, and they have sequential serial numbers. Same firmware & driver revisions, too. :confused:
They were purchased at the same time, and they have sequential serial numbers. Same firmware & driver revisions, too. :confused:
Hmmmm. Any outside inputs into this thing or your software? Temperature sensors? Date/time input?
Are the outputs of the two the same on subsequent runs? i.e. Unit A always outputs 1.1 and unit B always outputs 1.11?
Then they'll cancel my card without cause, as they CAN do, because I'm causing trouble and they're not making money off me because I pay my balance off completely almost every month. I can't afford that to happen right now: I'm leaving TODAY.
I sent a message via my log-in to C1, asking pretty please advise when funds will show available. I love kowtowing to the devil.
It's not my bank's fault. Last time C1 conferenced me and my bank who said "yes the funds are there." My bank is local. I know these people. C1 is corporate evil.
Did you get your money yet?
SG...do you think your migraines are stress-related? Do you have a history of migraines? Sending you well wishes: hope you feel better.
I don't think it's stress - things have been going really well here recently. I didn't get Mum's news after after the second one had already hit.
Today - being spooked as all hell at still not being able to keep water down after 5 days, I got a telephone appointment. Which was a great plan, but the Cod wanted to see me anyway - urgh.
Gave a pee sample - yes, I could have guessed I'd be dehydrated :) Also a trace of blood in the urine, so it's had to go off to be analysed. My blood pressure is also very high, but that's something to watch on an ongoing basis she says.
Apart from that, I've had a reaction to the codeine I was prescribed for the pain on Tuesday and this is what has been making me hurl incessantly and making my eyes so sensitive and my face itchy. Grumble grumble stupid body.
So current plan of attack. Eat after I throw up, so as much can be retained by my body as possible. Take Nurofen (ibroprofen) migraine tablets at this point too for the same reason - also can't take them on an empty stomach.
Keep taking sips od tepid water, and trying to trick my body into bland flabby foods as much as possible.
It nearly worked with the strawberry Muller Rice. Nearly in that it hadn't been down enough to taste bad, and after all it was soft. Not quite so keep on the smell of strawbs now though.
That's awful SG. You probably already tried it: but does massaging neck, shoulders, head and ears help any?
If your blood pressure is that high, did the doc mention it could be causing the migraine? I remember my mom had blood pressure related migraines before the meds.
Best wishes!
My buddy with diabetes had to have a toe removed. He seems in good spirits, but it's still a bummer.
Stupid car. Now the passenger side window is stuck halfway open. And it's rainy. Probably means a new motor? Like -- $300?
Clearly, must start saving money in earnest for a new car. Next year, perhaps.
Power windows. Just one more thing on a car to break, and totally unnecessary. I'll choose a manual crank any day. Do they even make any with manual cranks any more?
Mine comes with a crank in the front driver's seat.
very difficult to find unless you buy a stripped down model without A/C - :eek:
I agree. The power windows always seem to break, but they don't put hand cranks on anything but the very cheapest cars.
kludge.
and, I'm spiraling downward today.:sniff:
My stereo bluetooth headset keeps having issues with the contacts in the removable part that attaches the right/left side earpiece, making it cut out, and making me have to constantly fuck with it if I move at all.
Doesn't *anything* just WORK?
and, I'm spiraling downward today.:sniff:
Fixing crap in this house never goes according to plan. Gotta order another damn part and wait a week for it to arrive.
I have an ear blocked with water from swimming yesterday. Ive tried heated oil, rubbing alcohol mixed with vinegar, listerine, the hairdryer and every other rememdy Ive come across.
No pharmacies open in this town today, so I cant go eat anything over the counter.
I cant hear and Im off balance.
What you need is an earnest mouth to suck that ear out, girl.
You know, Im up for most things 'spode, but that just sounds really friggen gross. Now my neck, you can go for it, but I think I will leave the ear suction to the ENT ;)
I have an ear blocked with water from swimming yesterday. Ive tried heated oil, rubbing alcohol mixed with vinegar, listerine, the hairdryer and every other rememdy Ive come across.
No pharmacies open in this town today, so I cant go eat anything over the counter.
I cant hear and Im off balance.
Did you shake it like a dog coming in from the rain? Only thing that works for me.
Yeah Mon, I did that as soon as it happened and I hopped around like a crazy women....slept that ear facing the pillow. Its blocked like a mo fo now.
I read on the interwebz to use the palm of my hand like a plunger...I could feel it moving but no relief. :(
Ok, I read that as "heating oil".
Insert a drinking straw, light the end of it, and the suction should draw out the water.
Don't burn yourself.
try running backwards naked through a sprinkler and then under a ladder singing The Locomotion.
When the baby wants to sleep: can't even open the garage door at 3:30 am to put a car full of precious music gear in the garage.
When the adult, having gone to sleep at 3:30 am, wants to sleep a little longer at 8 am: there's the screaming baby, screaming baby daddy, and Nora the Fucking Explorer at full volume, and all that's just fine.
When the baby wants to sleep: can't even open the garage door at 3:30 am to put a car full of precious music gear in the garage.
When the adult, having gone to sleep at 3:30 am, wants to sleep a little longer at 8 am: there's the screaming baby, screaming baby daddy, and Nora the Fucking Explorer at full volume, and all that's just fine.
Dora
When the baby wants to sleep: can't even open the garage door at 3:30 am to put a car full of precious music gear in the garage.
When the adult, having gone to sleep at 3:30 am, wants to sleep a little longer at 8 am: there's the screaming baby, screaming baby daddy, and Nora the Fucking Explorer at full volume, and all that's just fine.
Grow some balls. :eyebrow:
This is where my Jeep is vacationing right now...
Autopsy: Shark killed man who washed up in Kill Devil Hills
A Pittsburgh man whose body washed up along North Carolina's Outer Banks after he went for a late-night swim died from shark bites, a medical examiner determined Friday.
It was the first reported shark attack in the region in more than eight years.
The body of Richard A. Snead, 60, was discovered Thursday morning near the 1300 block of N. Virginia Dare Trail in Kill Devil Hills by a tourist who was taking a walk, police said.
This is where my Jeep is vacationing right now...
Autopsy: Shark killed man who washed up in Kill Devil Hills
Just hope that your Jeep doesn't end up sleeping with the fishes! :eek:
One thing about it Jinx...... You'll never feel guilty about asking THEM for favors anymore, eh?
Srsly. I'm not even gonna cut Dennis's nails when they have to babysit him at thanksgiving - and they have carpet and upholstered furniture...
try running backwards naked through a sprinkler and then under a ladder singing The Locomotion with the video camera rolling
Fixed it for you.
I just found out that a buddy I work with is going to get fired tonight. I can't tell him....and it wouldn't help if I could.....
He's been close a couple times, so I don't think he'll be surprised...it's just that it's a really bad time for him financially, and this is going to kill him.
Well, shit. I was going to complain about something malfunctioning on my bike, but now that seems pretty fucking petty. Nevermind.
Been there. Bad part is when they find out you knew all along and acted like nothing was up all day. At that moment you just can't 'splain it. Even to yourself.
My freaking expensive dog ate my freaking expensive (and 2 months old) glasses!
Now we wait to see if she needs a freaking expensive surgery to get the lens we can not find, and assume she ate. If she does need surgery, I will need to borrow the cash, cause hubby was laid off for the summer and has not got a paycheque yet....SIGH
do you have an equivalent of the Humane Society/RSPCA?
here's hoping doggie poops lens..... consider it a new version of rock paper scissors.
doggie poops lens
vet opens doggie
lens makes vet look fat
I am mad about the glasses, but I am more concerned about the dog... sigh...
The Vet I called seems to think we have about an 80% shot she will poop it out. We gave her dog food she is not used to (Boxers have sensitive tummies) and olive oil mixed in and we are going out with her to make sure we are there when/if she goes. As long as she swallowed it whole she should be ok.
give her a nice curry. that should expedite matters!
Adds new meaning to the term"Hindsight's 20/20".
Adds new meaning to the term"Hindsight's 20/20".
:D
LOL -- really
Okay might be TMI, but have had my "monthly visitor" for two effing weeks now. And I caught a cold on top of it. Can I just curl up in bed til it all blows over?
Sure. I like the curled up position.
I'm going to strangle a classmate. News at eleven.
I'll watch Channel 7, Bri.
I'm going to strangle a classmate. News at eleven.
Not Juni?
Classmate Death Pool!
Bonus point for dickhead profs.
Classmate Death Pool!
Bonus point for dickhead profs.
that would be a good app for classmates.com....no?
Not Juni?
No. As it turns out, Juni is a perfectly lovely hippie. (Yes, Juni, I loved the tie-dyed dress and the long skirt!)
the soon-to-be-strangled classmate is a man in his 30's, and (of course!) a "preacher" - OF COURSE!
I'm gonna git that sucka.
From hobos to preachers.... that's a really broad spectrum, Bri!
I'm cultivating misanthropy. :biggrinba
Cultivating? it seems to be thriving in the favourable conditions! :D
Cultivating? it seems to be thriving in the favourable conditions! :D
Well...it's damp. :)
Well...it's moist.
There. Fixed it for ya.
Friend's daughter reported that her friend -15yo boy- who's mom died of breast cancer 5 years ago, was getting into it with some asswipes in their class, and one kid says to him "Why don't you go home and cry to your mommy -oh, you can't, can you?"
wtf? Where do these kids learn to be that nasty?
Karma is just waiting for that little fucker.
Sheesh.
it makes me ill. effed up world.
I'd help that lil fuckers karma if I were closer. I got all kinds of aggravation induced aggression with nowhere to vent it.
yeah it's a damn good job for that kid's sake that i didn't overhear it, I tell ya.
From hobos to preachers.... that's a really broad spectrum, Bri!
Bri does not discriminate based on life-style or creed. :D
Friend's daughter reported that her friend -15yo boy- who's mom died of breast cancer 5 years ago, was getting into it with some asswipes in their class, and one kid says to him "Why don't you go home and cry to your mommy -oh, you can't, can you?"
wtf? Where do these kids learn to be that nasty?
TV
Certainly not politicians.
TV
rather than the internet? Maybe it's a real-life overspin of the 9/11 you insensitive bastard type thing?
Nah, they've been that nasty at least since I was in school. A bloody awfully long time ago.
Friend's daughter reported that her friend -15yo boy- who's mom died of breast cancer 5 years ago, was getting into it with some asswipes in their class, and one kid says to him "Why don't you go home and cry to your mommy -oh, you can't, can you?"
wtf? Where do these kids learn to be that nasty?
This is exactly why I hate people. Well, one of the reasons.
Bri does not discriminate based on life-style or creed. :D
"So you're saying there's a chance"? //Jim Carrey//:eyebrow:
It's 5:30 am. There is a damn mouse in my wall, right next to my bed. He needs to die.
It's 5:30 am. There is a damn mouse in my wall, right next to my bed. He needs to die.
Rmtz needs a sawed off shotgun for wall crawler management.
also, the cellar told me it couldn't post that the first time, so now I look extra dumb.
I just figured the mouse had you all discombobulated.
I used to have that in my old apartment...stuff in the walls. It was a really old place. May have been squirrels, or bats...who knows?
my 80 year-old father was driving on the hywy today (with me in the car) and was drifting into another lane and I said, "You're drifting," and he turned to me and said, "Shut your effing mouth! I am NOT going to take any bullshit from YOU!" only he didn't say "effing"
:(
k.
that pretty much sums up our entire 45 year history with one another.
Things that we can laugh off from other people, or at least that help us to shake free of them, just hurt like hell from parents. They have an Agent Orange type burn.
Sorry he hurt you chick.
An ex cow orker has been ill for some time. I just got word he is at Cleveland Clinic struggling to hang on: he needs a liver transplant.
This guy is the kind of guy who seems all gruff and grizzly, rough around the edges, and he is actually a big-hearted old hippy who I had a a great time working with. We'd bitch and laugh...a LOT!
I'd watch him from my office window, smoking a cigarette as he rode the riding mower on a beautiful day, and think "right now, I want to trade jobs."
I hope he can get a transplant and gets better. I was lucky enough to run into him early summer at (what I call) the Chicken Festival. He looked ill, but seemed to be getting around well. He had two canes, and told me "I normally only have ONE cane, but I won the other one today." Great guy.
It occurred to me I've posted about this before. He was told, at one time, he had very little time left...and he just keeps plugging away.
I hope he gets his transplant. :(
Me too Shaw, sorry to hear he's struggling.
Was his liver damaged from acetaminophen do you know?
Actually, he has some form of hepatitis...I don't know much about those kinds of things.
I got rejected by a placement firm yesterday...because I don't have enough recent administrative experience. Never mind that I have 17 years of admin experience and 5 years of management experience...not to mention the fact that I kept up with the world around me while I was not in an office setting.
Frustrating...but I gotta keep moving forward.
Gah! Sorry bro, I'll keep my eyes open.
Mum's friend Breda died last night after a pretty damned short battle with cancer.
Mum blamed herself, because Breda had some of the same symptoms as her mother (Nan) did and she thinks she should have seen it. I pointed out to her that if she went around diagnosing friends with cancer, she'd work through them pretty quickly. It's up to doctors to diagnose after all. And it didn't help that Breda had been given a rambunctious chocolate Lab as a present (I agree with Mum, completely unsuitable) who was yanking her arm off on walks every day. Why would you assume arm and shoulder pain was a symptom of cancer?
Anyway. I am glad she's dead simply because we all knew it was coming and all that was left to her in life was pain. She died before she had to go onto the really heavy duty drugs. Also, a devoted Catholic all her life, she received Communion and Last Rites before she died.
She was the archetypal Irish mother - sorry, might not have mentioned she was Irish, although with a name like Breda... Her house was always an open house. She'd give you the shirt off her back and the last teaspoon out of her silver. She had time for everyone. Christmases when I came home to visit the 'rents, I was always invited over. I'd sit in her overheated, stuffy house, and be plied with sherry, mince pies, sausage rolls, and told what a saint my mother was. Then she'd shake her head at how glamorous I was, and tell me how proud my Mum was of me and how she talked about me all the time. She ignored how fat I was and complimented my hair, my skin, my clothes.
Okay, she spun a yarn. The weakness of the Irish.
If I believed in God I'd say Breda was what he had in mind when he created the human race. Instead, I just have to stick with saying she was a beautiful human person. She touched many people and will be missed.
Okay, she spun a yarn. The weakness of the Irish.
Are you Irish? ;)
Mum's friend Breda died last night after a pretty damned short battle with cancer.
.... I'd sit in her overheated, stuffy house, and be plied with sherry, mince pies, sausage rolls, and told what a saint my mother was. Then she'd shake her head at how glamorous I was, and tell me how proud my Mum was of me and how she talked about me all the time. She ignored how fat I was and complimented my hair, my skin, my clothes.
Okay, she spun a yarn.
OMFG SG you
are going through it at the moment. But remember this, Breda was NOT spinning a yarn - she was seeing the good in you, as we do here on Teh Cellar. You are glamourous, you have fab skin and hair, and a glorious twintle* in your eye (except maybe not just at the moment). You are fabulous SG. Remember this - Breda is right.
*I like the word twintle, I think it's better than twinkle, okay?
OMFG SG you are going through it at the moment. But remember this, Breda was NOT spinning a yarn - she was seeing the good in you, as we do here on Teh Cellar. You are glamourous, you have fab skin and hair, and a glorious twintle* in your eye (except maybe not just at the moment). You are fabulous SG. Remember this - Breda is right.
*I like the word twintle, I think it's better than twinkle, okay?
I always try to tell her so but she never listens to me. I hope you and Breda have better luck.
oops I didn't realize she was referring to breda spinning a yarn about SG. Sorry SG. I thought you meant generally.
Sorry for you and your mom's loss, SG. Don't be so hard on yourself, and don't let your mom be too hard on herself, either. :(
Breast Cancer is not usually fast, but it's usually secretive. That's why it's so fucking lethal. Mostly/especially in the bad cases... by the time it's physically detectable, it's way too late to do anything. By the time it's causing pain ...too late. That's why mammograms are so important. No-one -not even doctors doing a touchy-feely boob exam can be blamed for missing it. Certainly not friends who knew someone with similar symptoms.
cat piss is upsetting me today. And yes, it can be life-threatening.
Yeah, life threatening for the cat.
I repeat: I love cats. They taste like chicken.
Are you Irish? ;)
I know you didn't get what I meant originally, but for the record - I am not Irish, but I am of Irish heritage (as we say these days). Mum was not born in Ireland, but her maiden name is Doyle.
The Doyle family are as Irish as they come, and all shades of Irish too. He has the silver hair of the Irish (called White Irish) - which turned in his '20s - no Grecian 2000 in those days! Great Aunt Alice was Black Irish. She was grey by the time she died (last year, our closest great Aunt, much missed) but her hair was black for an unfeasibly long time - she had no vanity so I refuse to believe she dyed it. And Great Aunt Emma was a fiery redhead. Suited her job as a union rep and before-her-time feminist. Now in her eighties and legally blind, she still gives Mum an earful about "Your young gels" when Mum visits. Bless them all - brought up on home grown food - rabbits & geese & cabbage![/QUOTE]
Breast Cancer is not usually fast, but it's usually secretive. That's why it's so fucking lethal. Mostly/especially in the bad cases... by the time it's physically detectable, it's way too late to do anything. By the time it's causing pain ...too late.
Oh yeah. Both Nanny and Breda were fobbed off by doctors for months. Then it was only guesswork that narrowed it down to breast cancer, because it had rampaged through their bodies and was presenting
everywhere. Nan, being a woman of a certain generation (when the Doctor cost good money) wasn't diagnosed until she couldn't move her arm. Literally - she lost all feeling and movement. Her journey was doctor, hospital (that afternoon), hospice, home to die - it took a matter of weeks. When Breda was diagnosed it was already too late for treatment. It's heartbreaking - Mum proves it can be treated in day surgery. Bri proves a more aggressive strain can still be survived. Sigh. Funeral next week.
And the reason I'm posting?
It's just bad news week all round. My Uncle Charlie (not Dad's bro who I sometimes post about, but Nan's bro) had a very bad stroke on Saturday. I didn't know him all that well - some visits, but he's been ill for a long time so I haven't seen him in years. Mum is always in contact with Cousin Susan, who I know a lot better. She's been told by the staff at the hospital that there isn't really any hope and she should say her goodbyes. He's been on oxygen for months, but this has shut him down completely. Sounds like they're going to be asked to make a decision re the machines.
cat piss is upsetting me today. And yes, it can be life-threatening.
Doing my litter tray solid removal today, what was on top? Nice shiny turd with a red elastic band running through it. Red bands are only used by postmen, to hold the letters together. Lord knows where he got it from, but he ate it and it passed right through. Didn't upset me - made me laugh as much as a woman bent over a litter tray can. Didn't seem appropriate for the happy thread though ;)
... Great Aunt Emma ... Now ... legally blind...
As opposed to illegally :cool:?
No but seriously. Sorry about Uncle Charlie. As we agreed the other day (I think?) - life's a bummer at times.
Ah, Sundae - you need some Happy-Time Lucky-Good Fun. Things have been grim it seems - death and diarrhea! :comfort: You can always depend on change, though, so here's hoping some good change is on your doorstep, sweetie.
And just for the record - my breast cancer was actually not very virulent. It was negative for all the baddies - was HER2 negative, wasn't any of the three really deadly types - what it was, though, was a stage 3 based on how freaking huge it was - and why was it so huge? Didn't I feel it? Oh, yes. I felt it - for about 18 months; but I didn't have health insurance! I waited until I got insurance and then, that very day, I made the doc. appointment where I got a mammo. After the mammo, things moved very fast as I was set up with biopsy, MRI, etc. (remember, I was enrolled in a clinical trial and got things maybe some other women would not get due to that)
My tumor was large but relatively slow growing and not fed by estrogen. The virulent part came with the type of chemo I got - that was an experience I'll never forget.
cat piss is upsetting me today. And yes, it can be life-threatening.
It's upsetting me too.
My mom's cat, Tabby, is about 19. She's skinny and scroungy-looking and matted, and I think she's deaf. But she still eats, drinks, jumps on the bed, licks the shower curtain, roams all over the house and does other normal cat things so she doesn't seem to be suffering. But she PEES ALL OVER THE PLACE. She pees in my son's room, in front of the litter boxes we have throughout the house (we have 6 cats, we give them lots of opportunities to be good) and we think she peed on the couch yesterday. One of the cats peed in my office, too, and it reeks. I highly suspect it's Tab. I know for a fact she's the one that peed in my son's room and on the dining room floor, and regularly pees on the floor of our master bath (which is gutted for renovation, so she's peeing on the subfloor!)
I am so torn about this - logical thing to do is put her down, but how can I do that? I've never had to put down a cat that wasn't obviously sick to the point of death, so that the euthanasia just sped things along mercifully. Tab doesn't seem to want to go just yet.
We've tried everything I can think of - shutting her in the laundry room and listening to her cry all day, putting her in a cage and listening to her cry all day, laying down newspapers and trash bags, and the latest one is creating an extra-shallow litter box in the bathroom hoping she just doesn't want to climb (yet she has no problem with the bathtub, go figure).
So I live in a house that smells like cat piss.
That's upsetting me greatly.
Have you had her tested for diabetes?
Nope. I did have a diabetic cat years ago, so yeah, I know how it goes with sick cats. I do need to get her into the vet. I think there's blood in her pee too. I was planning to call the vet today, just never got 'round tuit. :(
ours is a 1yo neutered male. little git. twice in 24 hours, spraying. maybe there's a new cat on the block.
I've heard cats can also go into marking overdrive if you bring a potted plant from outside that's been sprayed by some outdoor cat into the house.
We didn't do that, but are about to bring 2 in, so thanks for the heads up
I thought neutered males did not spray. Odd, my parent's male has never sprayed that I know of.
They can do. It just doesn't smell do bad. Today the little shit brought in a live bird just as I was going out.
J'ever try that Nature's Miracle or Simple Solution or Pet-tas-tic or whatever they're calling it these days? Enzyme-based cleaning, it's always done a good job here.
the story about the gang rape at a homecoming dance in California. Up to 20 people knew, watched, and did nothing. why are we raising such animals?
[sigh]
O.k. Cloud just bummed me out.
serves you right for reading the "upsetting" thread! gotta be prepared for it . . .
Im feeling very sad for Wolf. I know I dont post very much(.03 posts per week or something...)but I am a pretty heavy lurker and have been for a number of years. I try to keep up on the comings and goings around here without any real emotional attachment ya know? Almost like watching a soap opera that is real yet out of arms length. Well Wolf has always been my very favorite Cellarite and Ive known her mother has ill for quite some time but when I saw the thread title last night it really came as a shock. I am very familiar with death,it always seems to hang close to me Ive lost many people very close to me and over the years ive learned to shrug it off,so its really suprising I would find myself so affected by this,someone I dont even know. I know shes a very strong person and will come through this fine,Im sure its even quite a relief for her,but still losing a parent is a very tough one to take. This is whats upsetting me today.
Well said shoot. I too find myself strangely affected by the loss of someone I've never known. I have communicated with Wolf and shared much with her. She is a wonderful woman and I am lost to find or share some comfort for her. There is nothing I can do but reach out and let her know I'm here. Sadly, I feel that is so little an offering in a time of such great need. :'(
I'm rather upset because I had to drive up to Albuquerque to have my Land Rover looked at. I have had a small gear oil leak coming from my transfer case and it is getting worse. I had it topped off in Socorro after my drive from Texas and you can see the oil just seeping out and the rear undercarriage has this nasty greasy coating on it.
I got a rental car and got checked into the hotel that I am meeting my wife at tomorrow and the dealer called and said after cleaning up the case and test driving it they determined that 2 of the 3 seals are worn out and the whole thing needs to be removed, repaired and reinstalled. It's about an 8 hour job so it will cost me around $1000. Not much of a choice as I am returning to Texas on Saturday which is 900 miles and the thought of burning up the thing is not a good option.
Oh well, even with this issue I still love my car. Life goes on and it could have been worse I guess.
Shoot and Classic, I'm the same.
I probably swear more on here than I ever do in real life. But that thread title came up in New Posts and said, "Fuck it!" out loud.
I've come back and posted happy things about today, because I have had a good day (and good days aren't always in supply). But it was in the back of my mind when I was walking to the shop, and back again, when I was cleaning Grandad's and when I stop thinking.
I felt the same when Bri got her cancer diagnosis and I thought we'd lose her. People online can be a bigger part of your life than I think some people appreciate.
Holy Crap, Chris. Not good to be stuck in the desert!
Not good to be stuck in the desert!
Tell that to people that run the
Badwater ultra.
also sad for mommies passing
Mommies and daddies... It's hard thinking you're next on the firing line.
Went out this afternoon to find that the local scumbags left me rear tailgate glass on my Explorer smashed out with square steel tube shelf support about four feet long that was still in the back of the truck. For some reason, they chose not to actually, you know, *steal* anything.
If the price of recycled steel goes any higher, you may yet come out ahead!
More likely vandals than thieves. That sucks, man. Will your insurance cover it?
Nope. My truck is 11 years old and has nearly a quarter million miles on the clock. However, it is sturdy, reliable and not even slightly rusty. But - I only carry liability, and that doesn't cover glass. My homeowners might cover it, but my deductible is higher than the replacement cost, which was $230, done on site by Safelite on two hours notice. Now, $230 is real money in my book, and I could have done a lot of things with that money, but it certainly could have been worse. It was almost certainly vandalism for Halloween (although I don't think we rated any tricks - we gave out huge handfuls of candy to everyone because we have so few trick or treaters, and we were open for business until Midnight).
All in all, this has been one Hell of a fucked up day. I had to deal with month end closing for starters. My boss likes to make it as challenging as possible. We used to have until 5:00 local time to close. Corporate changed that to Noon a few months ago. When they did that, for some totally inexplicable reason, my boss decided that it would also be a dandy idea to have a staff meeting on closing mornings, which means 30 to 45 minutes less than the four hours we now have instead of the nine we used to have.
I'm tough...I got through that with two minutes to spare. In the meantime, I had to line up the glass company, deal with the loan refinancing on the Grandview house, produce paperwork for the writeoff of over $40k worth of inventory caused by our going out of the fireplace business (three times, because the fireplace guy is a doofus and kept thinking of things he'd sold without posting them), cope with trying to get payroll done (a task made more challenging by the fact that we have a crew out of town who faxed in their completed work orders only to discover that the fax failed before completion), get funds for the staff lunch, and about fifty other things that had people standing in front of my desk every two minutes for three hours straight.
The piece' de resistance was when I stopped by the house on my way to TF's to pick up my computer, and Kaleigh ran down the stairs saying, "Oh, good, you're home! Call the gas company, they shut us off today even though we paid the bill over the automated system yesterday."
Fuck. So, twenty minutes on hold with them (while I listened to a song to which the lyrics, no shit, included the words "You're always calling me, always calling me..." set to a light R&B score. That's COLD) Well, come to find out, despite all of the technology available to corporations these days, it seems that, if you pay your bill via the automated system on one day, and your shutoff date is the next day, you have to call the company and tell them you paid it, give them your confirmation number, so that they'll call off the dude with the gas meter boot.
Now, call me cynical, but I know damn good and well that, if they didn't *want* this situation to exist, it wouldn't. Why does it exist? Because they charge you $45 to come and turn it back on, of course; a procedure that takes about ten minutes that is performed by a guy who probably does thirty of these things a day at a hard total cost of maybe $10 per house. So he costs the gas company $300, and rakes in $1350, leaving a net profit of over $1k per day.
What possible motivation would they have to fix a situation that makes them $1k a day for basically doing nothing? And what are you gonna do if you don't like it? Get a different gas company?
I plan to write a more lengthy treatise on why the Almighty Dollar is destroying society before too much longer. I'm no commie. I believe in Capitalism, but I don't believe that abandoning morality, common sense and humanity in pursuit of profit is a Capitalist tenet. In fact, they taught me that this was what the Commies did...
felt crappy. weak, lightheaded, heart racing, sore neck.
it'll probably disappear once I get home from work. I hope
Sorry you had a crappy day, Els. But hey, at least you know that if you're indispensable at work then they can never get away with laying you off, right?
My boss has actually told me flat out that he and I would be the last guys out the door in a worst case scenario. I don't really know if it is because I'm indispensable, or because he's gotten used to essentially doing nothing and making me do his work, though.
I *do* know a lot of stuff that no one else does. I didn't do it on purpose. It just happened. I have twenty years of experience in my pathetically underpaid career.
I just did something really, really stoopid.
Messing about with my new (bout a month old, but only started using it a week ago) casio digital camera, and dropped it. Wouldn't turn off, so took out battery and put it back in. It half turned off but the lens wouldn't fully retract. Now for the stoopid bit... I applied pressure to the lens and basically forced it to retract. Yeah...pretty dumb huh> Even as I was doing it I was thinking, Dani wtf do you think you're doing?
So...now it won't come out. I get 'Lens error', it comes halfway out then gives up and retracts again.
I am going to have to send it to the Casio repair place; where the engineers will no doubt instantly realise that the damage was caused by 'impact damage' or 'improper use' meaning it won't be covered by the warranty and will therefore quote me a repair bill more or less equivalent to the purchase cost of the fucking camera.
What a fucking idiot am I ?
Grrrr.
I wasn't even doing anything useful with the camera. I was attempting to work out how to use the timer setting to do a very slightly nsfw self portrait for the Cellar. Serves me right. That's karma that is, for being vain :P
I wasn't even doing anything useful with the camera. I was attempting to work out how to use the timer setting to do a very slightly nsfw self portrait for the Cellar. Serves me right. That's karma that is, for being vain :P
Oh no!!!! We will all be very disappointed we didn't get to see that. Lets add it to what upsets me today. :neutral:
Well, in the end I couldn't figure out the timing setting...so the shot I do have is at a slightly odd angle, since I am having to hold the camera up and point it at myself :P. Makes me look a little twisted. I'm not really that happy with it. I'll post it anyway tho.
Yeah!!! :) Thanks for making it all better!
Dana yer Howtness is what busted the camera !!
It fainted !!!
You are far too kind Zipp :P But I love you for it lol.
We had that happen to ours a few weeks ago dana. Beest fiddled with it some more and it got better again. try blowing some air to dislodge any muck that's trapped. shake it a bit. Call it bad names. Smack it like you would and empty fuel gauge....
mmmm. I'll try that. Though I suspect having forced it back into place I broke it fairly fundamentally :P
Well we did that too...... it was a little crunchy for a while once we got it working again, but recovered slowly.
Hmmm. I;ve tried blowing it. I've fiddled with it (yes I am still talking about the camera). It still gets halfway out then goes back in and gives me the lens error message :(
leave it 'til tomorrow. It'll probably feel better then. and if not, try grabbing it when halfway out and encouragin it to go further? i mean, can you make it worse?
and fuck it, d, it's 4am -go to bed!
lol you;re right. I really should go to sleep now
read a little tw, that should do it.....
Makes me look a little twisted.
Sounds like one of those multi-level self-portraits that express your personality as well as showing your appearance, then. :)
Send the camera back. Act Innocent. Insist there was no improper use. Require warranty repairs.
If it makes you feel better, there is a standard "one meter drop test" that everything is expected to pass - it should be able to survive a one meter drop onto hard surface (like concrete). If their camera couldn't take that, they owe you the repairs.
Mind you, I am not sure that applies to digital cameras. When in Thailand, my camera failed when I was holding it and slipped a bit - the camera never left my hand, never hit the ground, but got a good hard shake ... enough to destroy the lens mechanism. Damn. Mind you, the camera has a special 7.1x optical zoom squeezed into a slimline flat camera, so it is a bit exceptional.
It was way less than one meter onto a carpeted floor...
I rather suspect much of the damage has come from my attempts to force the mechanism back into plave rather than the original drop! I panicked when it wouldn't go back in. What I should have done is put it down somewhere, go have a cup of tea, and come back to it calm, then removed the battery and messed around with the on/off switch a bit to try and get it to go back in. But hey, ya live and learn :P
I am going to send it to the casio repair centre with absolutely no mention of any improper use and see what comes back from them.
I actually dreamt I fixed it last night lol.
send it back for repair. Don't mention your forcing the mechanism. Deny! Obfuscate! Demand!
Update: Ohmigod I love PCWorld!
According to the casio website the only way to deal with broken camera is to send it to the casio repair centre. According to the teeny tiny printed words on the little folded up warranty sheet in the camera box the second option is to take it to the place of purchase: PCWorld in my case.
Took it down there. Told half the story (it went dark with lens stuck out, took out battery and put back in and it retracted, now won't come out again). Didn't mention any dropping or forcing. In fact when I was telling the guy how little use it had had, I told him I'd bought it slightly less than a month ago (true) but only actually used from last week (true) and that it had seemed fine (true) and I was at home taking a photo of my dog (slight fib) when it had stopped working, I also said, that it hadn;t been anywhere exciting and hadn't had anything exciting happen to it.
He looked at it, told me this was a very common thing to happen. Then checked stock and said they had no more left. There was the possibility of taking a black one instead (£20 more than the green, which I'd have been happy to pay) or getting a different camera. I thought about it and said I'd really liked the camera before it stopped workng and would very much like the same model and whilst i was totally in love with the green colour, I'd rather takle a black one than a different camera... unless this was a particular problem with this model, in which case maybe I had better get a different one....he said it was a common problem with all of these kinds of cameras not just the casio exilim. He said if I really wanted the green one I could maybe pick up from a different branch. Since the other branches were all miles away I was going to just get the black one, but then asked if there was any chance of the other branch sending a green one to this store. He made a couple of phone calls and arranged for a new exilim green to be sent out to him. Should be there within a week. He's going to phone me when he has it. No additional charge to me :)
Quibble-free replacement. I really wasn't sure I'd get that. I was talked into trialling the 'anything goes' service for my PC when I bougth it, but I didn't take the option on the camera (extra 1.99 per month) so I figured they'd just say they had to send it away and I'd end up with a bill.
I love PCWorld. Of course I won't completely relax until i have it in my hand *grins* just in case he was mistakenly looking at the part of my receipt that said 'anything goes club' and thought it referred to camera rather than laptop. But I don't think that was it.
*sighs* lesson learned and apparently at no actual cost!
Yay! That worked out great!
And we got a damn good pic of you, deboot.
...but now we want more. And you'll have a new camera. <wink>
So Z and I stopped by the local bar to grab a beer after work yesterday - when we pull up there are like 50 Harley's in the parking lot - very odd for a Monday night in the 30s in October....Turns out it was the end of a memorial ride for a guy we've ridden with on several occasions - friend of a friend. Only 43 years old, amazing father of three, loving husband - He had left the same bar alst Saturday at 11:00 - left early to make sure he wasn't too drunk to ride - hit a patch of ice, lost it, went over a curb into a traffic sign. My buddy was with him - asid a helmet wouldn't have saved him, it was his body not his head, he was definitely not drunk, or speeding.
BUT OF COURSE the local papers just HAVE to write the story as "crazy biker with NO HELMET died in a crash. Police are investigating whether speed or alcohol were factors."
Never mind the part about Pat was a nice guy, a great friend, who will be missed by his family......
Sorry to hear that Queen.
The headlines gotta grab attention & sell papers - Nice guys and fathers don't do that.
Sorry, Queen. Us bikers always get a bad rap.
Thanks guys - and you are both right. Never mind that we do some of the most amazing charity work, or that we're always there for each other. Nope. We just pillage and plunder, right?
The only bikers I have actually met in my life have been middle-aged (or older) family men who've been riding their bikes for several decades. One of them was a grandfather to a young toddler. His youngest daughter was studying to become a doctor. *shrugs* Ya look a little different and you listen to 'scary' music. Nonsense, but then that's what newspapers lap up with a spoon.
During the week I work in a very white collar industry, and am the perfect "soccer mom." You would never know I went anywhere near a Harley, until those particualr days or nights.......
I can believe it. The guy I mentioned whose daughter was studying to be a doctor, was himself a geography teacher :P
... newspapers lap up with a spoon.
Dana, you shouldn't do that to a metaphor.
lol. Thanks. That one crept in. Not sure how. I think maybe I have been reading too many of said newspapers.
Not so much today, but yesterday.
And not so much upsetting, but best for this thread.
Breda was cremated yesterday (Mum's friend who died of cancer in case you don't read the cancer threads).
At first I found it very upsetting. I fought my way out of it - she was Mum's friend, not mine and if Mum wasn't crying I'd be damned if I would (this passes for good behaviour in Mum's mind). It was seeing the coffin brought in, knowing the lads carrying it and their relationship to her - son, son in law, surrogate sons (she was such a generous woman) and knowing what they carried. And then seeing her daughter. Mum counts her as pretty hysterical as a person, but although she was sobbing she did have great dignity.
The formality of the Mass soothed me though. As it seemed to do to everyone. The people crying at the beginning were mostly just sniffling by Communion.
She had a wonderful turn-out. The church can take 200 at a squeeze - and does at Christmas and Easter, with both galleries open and even then you get people standing in the vestry - I'd estimate at least 100 yesterday. About the same as for a usual Mass. That's a lot.
I didn't go to the Crem. I don't like them. If I had a closer connection with her, of course I would have gone. My sister and family went - she was my niece's Godmother. But I felt I'd paid my respects and Mum had enough family support.
I went to the wake, although I hadn't intended to - I felt that perhaps I hadn't earned it, not going to the Crem. But Mum pushed and I'm so glad I did. They had a pseudo-marquee in the garden and it was decorated with blown up photos of her, and photo boards. I was so pleased to see Mum in four of them - she really was close and I know towards the end she felt a little left out. Fresh flowers, Irish music, shedloads of food and drink and hired tables and chairs. Many of her friends came together to provide either at cost (through contacts) or FOC, like Mum who made some buffet dishes.
In the end it was a celebration of her life.
I talked to her daughter, who was a lovely, tearless, totally unhysterical hostess.
I know Mum misses all the things they shared. I know it's not just a death, but a hole in her own life. But as her passing is a fact, I also know Mum's glad she was sent off in a way which would have delighted her. RIP.
Not so much today, but yesterday.
And not so much upsetting, but best for this thread.
Breda was cremated yesterday ... But as her passing is a fact, I also know Mum's glad she was sent off in a way which would have delighted her. RIP.
Terrible as it is to lose a friend or family member, there is great comfort to be had from the right sort of send off. Hugs to you and your mum, SG.
Not nearly as bummer as SG's (so sorry, Sundae - it's been a helluva year, eh?) but my effing computer is not OK! I've got to buy a new one - and a paper is due on Monday so will have to write paper on an unfamiliar computer! :mad:
Neck, head and right shoulder ache. Work is slow and booooring!
Sorry for your mum's loss SG.
Oh and FUCK CANCER
Pretty much everything is pissing me off today. that is all. :mad:
Pretty much everything is pissing me off today. that is all. :mad:
Hangover?
nah. seasoned drinkers like me don't get em!
One of the cats had shat or puked on the landing
Car doors were frozen shut this morning -I had tried to clear out the garage to get the car(s) in yesterday, but had such a busy day was just too tired to stand up any longer, so cars stayed outside in first heavy frost ...as did my hibiscus plants because we forgot to drag them in despite saying "oh we must do that everyday this week.... and now they're dead....
I found an error in one of the swim clubs acoounting (made by me) which means we didn't make as much profit as we thought we did and currently lots of happy people are planning how to spend that $$$ same error caused the bank a/c alomost to go into the red, although hopefully I caught that in time, but it meant a special trip to the bank....
I had misplaced a check for a different organization (scrip for the school) and did find that -but after two hours so i didn't get the work done I waned to so now I have to do that tonight
I spilled coke everywhere -me cat, desk, keyboard, paperwork....
I couldn't order the new cellphone i wanted online so had to go through the torturous phone system
The online bank is still not sending transaction confirmations and they can't work out why and kept hanging up on me so I kept having to go through the security rigmarole
I only managed to spend 45 minutes working in the thrift store and had no time to shop
i was late for the scrip store at school so didn't get my sign out on the curb -which increases business.....
and the afternoon is yet young.....
wow I'd be cranky too.
So maybe you've got all of your bad luck over with and you can have a fabulous weekend.
Algebra.
Angles L and M are complementary. L= 14x+7 M= 20x+15
Srsly, I have no idea goddamnit. I need to get my kid a tutor or sit in on a couple 6th grade math classes. Fuck.
Complementary angles add up to 90 degrees. So L + M = 90.
(14x+7) + (20x+15) = 90
simplify. solve for x.
Yeah thats where Im stuck - I don't know how to solve for x. I know it's 2 I just don't know why.
Look in the kids book or online for simplifying algebraic expressions. You should find everything you need. Here's this one:
(14x+7) + (20x+15) = 90
14x + 7 + 20x + 15 = 90
34x + 22 = 90
34x = 68
x = 68/34
x = 2
(14x+7) + (20x+15) = 90
first of all put like terms together i.e. Xs together and numbers together:
14x + 20x + 7 + 15 = 90
>> 34x + 22 = 90
then get the Xs on one side and the numbers on the other. So this by subtracting 22 from each side
34x = 90= 22
>> 34x = 68
then divide both sides by 34 to get the value for 1x
x = 2
lemme lemme
(14x + 7) + (20x + 15) = 90
because of associative property of addition,
14x + 7 + 20x + 15 = 90
reduces to
34x + 22 = 90
subtract 22 from both sides
34x = 68
divide both sides by 34
x = 2
Ha! I was halfway to typing an answer, and then I figured "it's been too many minutes since I opened the thread, I guarantee someone's already jumped on this."
just remember each time you have to do the same to both sides, and let the terms you want to get rid of dictate what you do.
so after you have got all the like terms together (in quadratic equations all the xsquareds would be together too, giving you three types of terms)....
first look to get rid of the number term on the side with the Xs. in this case we have a +22 we don't want
then in the next step we know what 34Xs are, but we only want one, so divide by 34. just remember to do the same to each side
You guys are awesome. Still gonna look into that tutor...
heehee. bet i'm the only one with a PhD in the acquisition of algebraic-type problem-solving skills, though! eh? eh?
employ me. Field trip to algebra tutor once a week....
Are you willing to relocate for very little pay and no benefits?
My son is a wiz at math too. I barely squeaked by college algebra. I think I got a mercy pass. I tried and tried to get it but didn't. I remember it being a lot like UT was doing. ( Yeah I know that's elementary)
I think monsters method sounded the simplest. I could actually understand it. I think you'd be a good teacher monster.
The problem is I think the formulas need to be like UT's? They way the schools want or wanted you to do them was in that strict formation?
Not that it matters. Jinx got her answer. I am just curious..always.
hehe @ 3 geeks a leaping
three geeks a-leaping
haggis!
Anyone else think Dar's been stalking this type of post for a while?
I have to put a cat down. You know what I mean. :(
My son is a wiz at math too. I barely squeaked by college algebra. I think I got a mercy pass. I tried and tried to get it but didn't. I remember it being a lot like UT was doing. ( Yeah I know that's elementary)
I think monsters method sounded the simplest. I could actually understand it. I think you'd be a good teacher monster.
The problem is I think the formulas need to be like UT's? They way the schools want or wanted you to do them was in that strict formation?
Not that it matters. Jinx got her answer. I am just curious..always.
hehe @ 3 geeks a leaping
all three of us (me dar and toadie) did the same thing, I just explained it at 6th grade level. actually, I do teach math, I just don't get paid for it ;). I'd be a crap real teacher -I'd kill the little shits if I had them for an extended period of time.
And as for what the schools want -Jinx is the school :lol:
It really is a good idea to get a tutor, though Jinx -and get one who really loves math. Half the battle with the kids I work with is that all their life they've heard that math is boring and hard so it's an uphill battle before they've even found out what it's really all about ....plus by the time they reached this point, if they've been in a standard school system, even the ones who did enjoy math have been bored to tears by having "math facts" drummed into them and doing gazillions of basic problems so everybody knows math r srs subject.
Yes, I'm a little passionate about this, how did you guess?
Sorry about your cat, Juni.
I'm so sorry, Juni. That really sucks.
Aaawww....Juni. That sucks. He/she can go chase mice in kitty heaven with mine that have gone the same route.
Anyone else think Dar's been stalking this type of post for a while?
:D Mostly just white and nerdy. But I've also had practice recently helping the darlets with homework.
You ok, Juni? We've had to have dogs put down. It's a really hard decision to make.
Complementary angles add up to 90 degrees. So L + M = 90.
(14x+7) + (20x+15) = 90
simplify. solve for x.
How do you know it isn't (14X + 7X) + (20X + 15X) = 90? Or (14 + 7X) + (20 + 15X) = 90? ;)
I have to put a cat down. You know what I mean. :(
Condolences, Juni. :sniff:
Aww Juni *hugs* so sorry to hear that. You ok honey?
This isn't anirritation but more like sadness. I can't find a "What's making you sad today" thread so I decided to put it in this thread. I just found out tonight that a friend's mom is going to die soon. Her health has been going downhill, of course, the family still had hoped she can pull through. The doctor just called and said she won't be able to recover at all. She has a rampant infection going on and some blood clots in her arm. When those clots dislodge, she will go under cardiac arrest. The doctor told the family to meet with him tomorrow and to bring the mom's living will. She has been on the ventilator for almost 3 weeks. She also has been heavily sedated because of the pain. As soon as I got my friend's email, I called him to give him some comforting words. However, he gave me comforting words instead because I couldn't stop crying. :sniff::lame::neutral: I'm actually worried about the father too. They have been married for 49 years. Imagine losing a spouse after 49 years of being together. :sniff:
Sorry to hear about that Tulip. Hang in there.
I won't even have the opportunity to spend that long with my someone. I think it will be extremely difficult, but they were VERY fortunate to have had that much time together.
We're having issues with LL's teacher. I understand it is a taxing, underappreciated, and underpaid job, but it is a job. do your fucking job cockwhore. Her answer to everything is "oh he'll probably be fine. oh he didn't score well on the test? just give him easier books."
lazy bitch is trying to get him to test at nearly a year under what he was doing LAST year because it is easier than getting to the root of the problem. he is having trouble taking his comprehension tests during class "free time" when people are running around. he got 5 out of 10 right on a book he knew inside and out and he's pretty upset about it. she had him take it at 3:00 at a computer next to the exit door while other kids streamed out for a 3 day weekend and interrupted him to make sure he knew i was waiting for him.
we acknowledge l LL has to learn to overcome and cope with his ADD issues but let's not make it harder for the kid.
What happens based on the score of this test?
The rest of his academic career is based upon the opinions of his current teachers. I learned that shit the hard way. Fuggers!
right, but apparently her opinion is that his results in this test aren't overly worrying.
From a complete stranger's POV, my concern would not be about the test results as much as LL's being upset about it. Why so much pressure on such a young child? Or rather why is he feeling so much pressure? If the stress is exacerbated by his ADD, maybe reduced testing should be part of his IEP.
L123 is absolutely right to be upset about this, and my question is how to turn it into something not upsetting, something positive for the future. I'm not entirely sure the teacher isn't doing her job -although the testing by the door situation seems a bit odd to say the least... but maybe she was just trying to reassure LL that it really wasn't a big deal by putting him in a quiet room on his own so he wouldn't feel so stressed and that just backfired due to the presence of L123 outside and the interfering nature of other kids?
I read it as though the teacher just wants to dumb down the curriculum so that LL can pass and she doesn't have to do any more work. What LL NEEDS is more attention and a quite test-taking environment.
That was my take. But hell we all know what my opinion is worth. :<
Does he need a test-taking environment at all is my question? Why is this testing being done, why is it being done differently from the other kids and most importantly why is it causing LL stress? I'm sorry it's pissing L123 off, but I'm even sorrier that it's stressing LL.
I think we're talking bout different things -you're talking about the teacher's attitude generally -and i agree with your interpretation of L123's description- whereas I am talking about the one test that is the catalyst of this particular upset. If that can be addressed, maybe it can form a good starting point from which to address other issues.
But I understand this is really the venting rather than problem solution thread, so I'll stfu now.
I can't even begin on what's upsetting me today, but it's long, complex, unpleasant, going to involve shitloads of paperwork and it's emotionally stressful for me, I've actually cried over this shit today....(but in mitigations it's that time).....and then someone just emailed with a request for info that with require similar work for acrimonious divorce proceedings. I could just say no, but it sounds like she needs all the help she can get and as I have to go through all the records anyway.... maybe the good karma of helping her will help me. Of perhaps I'll just end up in the middle of more unpleasantness. What is it they say about the road to hell? :rolleyes: Needless to say I'm procrastinating as usual and have pissed my day away again.
No good deed goes unpunished.
I got a similar response from my son's teacher today, but I have to admit, in this case, it was a relief. He's struggling, but really it's his own damn fault - he's a brilliant kid but as the saying goes "is not working up to potential." Does dumb things like forget to turn in homework, doesn't study for tests, doesn't write things in his agenda, forgets to have me sign things like log sheets, practice sheets, forgets to put his name on things.
Teacher and I agreed it is probably just a maturity issue (he's a June baby, probably should've been held back, if I knew then what I know now . . . . ) and he will get it one of these days so we should just be happy with B's and C's as long as he's learning. It goes against my instinct - but I agree, at least to some extent. Pick your battles.
So we have devised this plan - he earns $10 for every report card A, as long as he gets nothing under 70. He didn't make it this quarter. :( Also if he gets under 70 on 2nd quarter report card, all extracurriculars are canceled.
About the cat -- she is still with us. Vet appointment tomorrow. Don't know what the result will be. I don't know what to do about this cat. She's 19 and looks terribly scroungy, but she still gets around fine, has a great appetite, etc. Only problem is that, though she uses the litter box, she has a habit of peeing on the floor by the litter boxes and in my son's room. And we think, also, on the couch, on anything left on the floor, papers, towels, clothes, shoes, school bags, occasionally in my office, etc. We have to smell everything before we use it and that is REALLY getting old.
Still, it's hard. She's my mom's cat. I inherited her when mom died, and I promised my mom we'd take good care of her. I've never had to put a cat down that wasn't already obviously on its way out and just needed a little help hastening the process. This feels a bit too arbitrary. :(
...Still, it's hard. She's my mom's cat. I inherited her when mom died, and I promised my mom we'd take good care of her.... :(
And you have. You did not, however, say for how long, so that's out of the equation. Now it's a matter of how much cat piss you can stand.
Did you talk to the school psychologist Juni? My friend's son has similar things going on and ADD is suspected. Super-bright, but will do nothing on his own volition except read or play computer. She's always suspected something but never really pursued it because he is the youngest in the class and the teachers felt he'd get there eventiually and then was told that it's starting to really affect his work and that there doesn't have to be a hyperactive part to ADD. I'm not saying your son has this, or that my friend's cone does -she only heard this last week, but just that maybe it's worth ruling it out?
and what Bruce said re the cat.
God we're all having seriously crappy times right now, aren't we? Bloody human race.....
Yup. We had him evaluated for ADD about a month ago. The answer was a resounding NO. He's just spoiled and passive-aggressive. :)
oh that is good news. well, you know what i mean....
God we're all having seriously crappy times right now, aren't we? Bloody human race.....
It's children I tell you, if people stopped having children the aspirin market would tank. That would solve the global warming problem too.
But I think I'll keep him anyway. How can you resist this? With those dimples?
or what about this taken in class by his teacher :lol:
.
Get that boy a haircut, and a suit 'n tie or uniform. That'll straighten him right out.
I'd have better luck shaving the cat....
monster, I almost forgot to tell you. A couple weeks ago I ran into my cousin (the one I was sitting with at the bar when you arrived for dinner on your way home.) She asked if you had had fun and she said "what a cute family!"
I agreed. And really cool, too. :)
oh that is good news. well, you know what i mean....
:3_eyes:
Get that boy a haircut, and a suit 'n tie or uniform. That'll straighten him right out.
:D
Fricking anal-retentive health insurance adjusters.
"I see that you provided that information in box 12. Well, we needed it in box 9. Them's the rules, Miss. Please resubmit all forms."
My neck hurts for no good reason! I can barely hold up my head though and it hurts to turn it either way. wtf!? It's been days and I'm eating aleve like pez at this point.
call me if you want me to stop and get you some tiger balm or ben gay or sumpin
Maybe some heroin. I'll let ya know... thx
I didn't know fresh sold heroin....
So that's where he's been!
yup. got caught.
[youtube]yGcGgddj23U[/youtube]
(is this gossiping? Or just outright bullshitting?)
It just struck me, properly, for the first time that Christmas 2008 was Dad's last Christmas. he spent it alone, as he couldn't travel up, I was unwell and my bro was knackered by the run up to Chistmas (work and also getting things ready for the girls and a few trips over to dad's to try and get his house cleared up and more comfortable.)
He bought goose for us to have at my Bro's house. And as he was unable to travel he got himself a small one as well. Trouble is it was too big for his cooking tray and oven. he stuffed it in there. Then I think he fell asleep or something. It charred somewhat on the outside. Then he couldn't get it out of the oven. He managed to get some of it out, but it was all dried out. It was all a bit much for him and he gave up on it, ate something else and went to bed. When he was telling mum about it a few days later, he said he'd been really disappointed about it. He'd been looking forward to goose, hadn't had it in years.
The idea of him trying to cook a goose for himself, all alone, struggling for breath after every movement, and then being gutted (and exhausted) when it was ruined, upsets me. I haven't thought about it in a while. It upset me when mum first told me about it. But I hadn't realised then that it would be his last Christmas. I also hadn't realised then that the next time I saw him he'd look so totally different with his white beard and one white eyebrow (the other remained resolutely dark grey to the end)and be barely conscious.
it's just really upset me that his last Christmas was so shit. I can't get the picture out of my head, of his lonely little bungalow, and the piles of packages, opened and unopened, from catalogue stores. The cupboards full of every last ingredient, by a man who loved cooking, but had no breath left to do it.
My neck hurts for no good reason! I can barely hold up my head though and it hurts to turn it either way. wtf!? It's been days and I'm eating aleve like pez at this point.
Are you ok jinx?
I am sky, thanks for asking. Feels better today than yesterday, and yesterday was WAY better than the day/night before. I still don't know wtf... felt like whiplash or meningitis or something else horrible but I didn't do anything to hurt it. Strange.
I reckon you were straining to see if there was anything interesting further down in cloud's nsfw pic.
I think that's exactly what it was.
Today it's disappoint more than upset but there's no thread for that...
Spent most of the day at CHOP, which is just not my happy place, meeting with the kid's plastic/hand surgeon, getting xrays, meeting some more... Unfortunately no major advancements have been made in the last 9 years and there's still no real fix for my kids' messed up fingers. Damn it to hell.
Thanks Clod. We were referred to a genetic counselor, which is kind of an awkward thing to discuss... I'm interested for sure, the more info the better.... I think. Eh, we'll see. I just don't want the kids to feel weird about it.
Bummer Jinx. I don't think I knew about the finger thing. Is it disabling or just irritating? Or am I being too nosy?
Do either of you have it too, or is it something that requires both parents to be carriers, or is that what you'll find out? Or am I being too nosy some more?
Spence's right hand had just about every bone deformity you probable never heard of... contractures, deltaphalages camptodactyly, repaired polydactyly, etc etc I forget what else. The fingers of his left hand were just all fused together.
When he was born the doctors were all "no idea why, luck of the draw", and he had surgery to repair what they could. Then ippy came along with 3 major and 1 minor contractures. Todays xrays showed that her affected joints look the same as spencer's affected joints.
Genetics were mentioned but no one in either of our families had these issues that anyone can remember.
So basically the kids have fingers that have very little range of motion. Like 55-150 degrees instead of 0 to 180 (and spence has one that doesnt move at all). Today the surgeon said he could change the range of motion but not likely increase it, and complications from surgery could actually reduce it. Neither kid is interested at this point.
I don't blame them. So if it is genetic, sounds like the chances of them passing it one are very minor. I presume they cope pretty well with most stuff or you'd've mentioned it before. Thanks for answering my questions.
I was worried about meningitis too but I'm glad it is gone.
It's tough to go through those times when things aren't right with kids health but they have two great parents who are over comers so they won't let it hold him back. Not that that makes it any easier. I'm just saying ya aren't hand wringers and that's the best treatment of all.
I was worried about meningitis too but I'm glad it is gone.
It's tough to go through those times when things aren't right with kids health but they have two great parents who are over comers so they won't let it hold him back. Not that that makes it any easier. I'm just saying ya aren't hand wringers and that's the best treatment of all.
:eyebrow: :lol: did you mean to do that? or was it just an off-the-cuff comment?
This stuff is news to me, damn it sounds like a serious challenge to deal with. Fingers are mighty important.
Are their feet affected too?
Sounds like a difficult thing to deal with. Let's hope medicine continues to progress.
:eyebrow: :lol: did you mean to do that? or was it just an off-the-cuff comment?
OMG
no Zen
:eek: :o:thepain::greenface sorry jinx
That means they are not excessive worriers so that it would hinder the kids growth. I wouldn't be flip like that when it comes to something serious.
I'm sure, by now, jinx and LJ are used to a joke or two. Anyone dealing with a chronic condition in themselves or a loved one learns to use humor to their best advantage.
:comfort:
Yeah, it's not a huge big deal, doesn't really hold them back from much at all. Gloves are difficult... pro baseball isn't in their future. I was just hoping it could be made a little easier for them at this point. Like if they could flatten their hands they could do more gymnastic stuff... nothing really earth shattering.
I didn't notice it. :headshake
I'm sure, by now, jinx and LJ are used to a joke or two. Anyone dealing with a chronic condition in themselves or a loved one learns to use humor to their best advantage.
:comfort:
I hope so. Because:
Ahh, taht strange mixture of genuine sympathy and taking the piss.... I love the cellar.
Ahh, taht strange mixture of genuine sympathy and taking the piss.... I love the cellar.
hey you started it mr funny bone
hey you started it mr funny bone
That takes it, hands down......;)
Wow Jinx, I had no idea. Guess it's not that disconcerting after living with it for a while, you learn to deal, but I understand your concerns for the limitations they might encounter in the future. There are so many amazing parents in Teh Cellar - I only hope I could/can live up to this standard if/when Princess OTR encounters any such difficulties.
I only hope I could/can live up to this standard if/when Princess OTR encounters any such difficulties.
Just pray you need not deal with them. TRUST ME, its a far better way to go.
Just pray you need not deal with them. TRUST ME, its a far better way to go.
I do daily, and say thanks that I don't.
What is upsetting me most is the stupidly early time I must get up tomorrow, and that we must battle the michigan game traffic to get our everyday stuff done. beyond that, it's pretty much all good
I have been awake for 24 hours. At work. And there is no end in sight. That is all.
Made plans with friend to out tnight to see Piarte Radio and then have dinner. Just found out all of the local theaters have postponed pirate radio over the holiday so they can show more disney and new moon crap. grrrrr.
Dani your post made me cry.
You know I'm sentimental about my father (less and less now I live with the cantankerous old bugger!) and I have huge issues around food.
The story could not have been better pitched to affect my tear ducts.
But your Dad was a stubborn and proud man.
I doubt he suffered as much as you have over the incident.
I'm so sorry for your sake, but you shouldn't torture yourself. If any vestige of him remained he'd be mortifed that you did. And I think he's gone to a plce with no more suffering and no more recriminations. Your memories are where he lives on - they shouldn't be bad ones.
Jinx - I had no idea. Sorry for the bad news.
All I can say is at least they are smart.
Brains are more useful than physical perfection, unless you want to be a model.
Oh, and perhaps not in the event of a zombie attack, when they are simply a comestible.
Love to you and yours anyway, your kids have a great grounding in how to be successful and get the best from life.
Selene and I *both* have the flu, possibly H1N1, but they didn't actually do strain tests.
This is not fun. Definitely putting the kibosh on a nice Thanksgiving.
:(
I hope you both feel better soon.
Having computer (hardware) programs. Yeah, pretty minor stuffs compared to what everyone else is going through, but this is really pissing me off. :p Computer has been showing one problem after another for the past several days. :thepain: It's only 1 1/2 yr. old so no, I shouldn't have to need a new one. :neutral:
By the way, Elspode, I hope you and Selene(your wife?) feel better soon. My friend's mom just passed away from complications caused by the H1N1 flu so hearing anyone having that is just unsettling for me.
The NY State Senate in Albany just
voted against gay marriage.
We had to fire someone today. I like her too. Normally I'm not involved much in that stuff, but this time I had to go get her key from her and her company credit card. Sucks. Bad time to be fired.
Glatt - hopefully she'll have my experience - I got laid off two weeks before Christmas last year (after 15 years on teh same job) - I was devistated - lived on severance and Vodka for a few days.....but found a much nicer, happier, better paying job within two weeks! I've heard similar stories, so there is hope for nice people out there.....
skin cancer is back. nothing serious but it is an icky feeling.
skin cancer is back. nothing serious but it is an icky feeling.
So sorry to hear this. :( Cancer sucks, no matter how minor it seems.
And not to seem unsympathetic, I'm gonna bitch now. All four windows in my car is dead and have been for almost 2 years. My brother said he'll get it fixed but taking forever to fix them because he's waiting to get the parts at a cheaper price. :neutral: So my sister decided to take it out to a mechanic. He quoted $360, so we said okay. Two days later, he said there are more problems so it's gonna cost us $580 to fix four windows. WTF! I'm thinking forget and just not roll down the damn windows ever. :mad2:
Sorry that I don't post often and when I do, I just bitch. :greenface
Its one of the truths of life, everything that lives will eventually die. I know that is reality but it still makes me sad. One of my Belgian puppy girls died of renal insufficiency. =(
4 LO123 Fuck Cancer :mad:
Am very sorry to hear that.
I've been waiting and waiting on a package and found out last night from my sister (I used her account so she gets the tracking emails) that the item was already sent and received. Stupid me, this morning I thought of checking directly into Amazon account and found out the package was delivered exactly at 3:54PM on December. I ran out to the front gate (I live in a gated community) and of course, there's no package. The package is simply gone. Got no idea who took it. :mad:
We all missed Hebe's school concert tonight. Instead we sat on the freeway for over two hours, before cars started turning round and going back along both hard shoulders, apparently with no direction from the police. Apparently there was (still is) a downed powerline closing the whole freeway, but to leave us sat there without and redirection was ridiculous. And Hebe has been looking forward to that concert since she learned about it in September -we bought her special blouse two months ago :( :angry:
Aww Man !!!! sorry to hear that Monnie
Tulip Who signed for your package ?? or did UPS just Dump it at the gate ???
Monster: So sorry to hear that. Poor Hebe must be really disappointed.
Zippy: I called the courier and they said no one had to sign for it. The package was just left at the front desk at the gate. Well, today I called the seller today and said NO ONE received the package even though the courier claimed that it was delivered. Amazon is going to send me another package. :D Betcha I'm gonna be on a look out this time! :p
Sorry to hear that Mon - I know how I'd feel as an adult, so Hebe must have been shattered.
Tulip - bloody UPS. Still, it's up to Amazon to make the complaint, as the contract is with them. In the mean time at least you haven't lost out (apart from time and frustration).
This isn't really upsetting, so much as a minor disappointment:
When I opened my bedroom door this morning there was a big, brown cardboard box there. "Ooooh!" I said, only to hear this mimicked from downstairs by Mum & Dad. Secret Santa!
Mum shouted up, "Don't make a mess opening it up there in your nice clean room!"
"No," I replied, "I'm going to bring it downstairs to make a mess opening it down there!"
So with box under my arm and camera in my hand I came down to start the documenting process, and to decide whether I really should save it.
By the time I got downstairs, however, I had realised something. It was posted in the UK. An unlikely Secret Santa. And it was very light for its size. And I'd ordered something from eBay on Mum's behalf that was large but light (a device for fitting surgical stockings, for Grandad).
I don't know who was more disappointed - my parents or me!
I opened it to be sure, and confirmed it was Grandad's device, not a lovely prize for me.
Silly to be adversely affected. It means I don't have to worry about my eBay purchase. And after all I still have a Secret Santa to look forward to. Just somehow I feel cheated!
...This isn't really upsetting, so much as a minor disappointment:
When I opened my bedroom door this morning there was a big, brown cardboard box there. "Ooooh!" I said, only to hear this mimicked from downstairs by Mum & Dad. Secret Santa!
... Just somehow I feel cheated!
I know the feeling - nothing worse than that deflated feeling when the parcel contains something ornery when you're expecting something delightful!
My ex-husband.
May he experience the exact sort of pain and frustration he's caused me for most of the time I've been unlucky enough to know him.
the words "controlling" and "MFKER" were surely invented with him in mind.
I am trying to control my feelings, but he really just......errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh!!!!!!!!!
Bri, sorry to hear that . . . we really need to swap stories sometime.
I hope the economy picks up. I know it will but I hope it is sooner rather than later. After reading that 'depressing' thread about Santa my heart is racing as I sit here.....day after day filling out applications...online...why is everything online these days?
At least there is retail if worse comes to worse. It's a piddly job but I know people in HR.
It's a faster way to sort out people that can't use the English language and/or have weird names.;)
The more I change, the more I stay the same. :(
It's a faster way to sort out people that can't use the English language and/or have weird names.;)
Also a good way to eliminate all the applicants who don't have 100% of the mutually contradictory and/or physically impossible combinations of skills and experience that are required, while providing handy statistics for the HR department to use in documenting the value of the HR department.
"Oh, yes, I see" she replied knowingly and with enthusiasm.
My darling philodendron, Amy, is in the ICU courtesy of Spiderman - who continues, despite warnings, to behave in a reckless and irresponsible manner unbecoming a house-pet. Drat drat drat
:( what happened?
near-continuous jumping, leaping and digging. Spiderman hates philodendrons. And Christmas. And my heirloom amethyst ring, 18K.
Dammit!!!I read a text I shouldn't have.
And it was something that I just didn't need to know, so I'm only hurt because of my own actions.
So it's just what I deserve for being nosey. Which makes it worse.
Not a major upset, just a low nagging upset, like a blister, you know. I'll be over it by tomorrow.:sadpace:
And yet another Christmas looms, with me not sending cards...I think I may have missed the date...I must check.
Sundae, hon, I got your card. I was absolutely lovely. I didn't post about it when i first got it because I was in denial about Christmas at the time (anything happening after my current deadline does not exist) :P
And yet another Christmas looms, with me not sending cards...I think I may have missed the date...I must check.
Sundae, hon, I got your card. I was absolutely lovely. I didn't post about it when i first got it because I was in denial about Christmas at the time (anything happening after my current deadline does not exist) :P
Second class today, first class on Monday Dana - get yer skates on!
Don't worry on my behalf Dana. I never send to receive, and the last thing I'd ever want is a gesture of friendship to make someone feel obligated or guilty in any way. It's enough that it got to you.
I've still got to wrap mine. Going to buy ribbon and glitter spray on Monday - the actual wrapping paper is the tissue paper from J&J's parcel. Spray glitter will make it look more festive. And get on everyone's hands, faces, the carpet, the cats.... Christmas sparkle - lovely!
Heh...what Dana said! I suck at Christmas! :blush:
Well, that's one way to have a white Christmas.
And why it only comes but once a year....
Oh Honey, yours didn't make me feel guilty. I know you know what I'm like on stuff like that lol.
The ones that give me a guilty twinge are the ones that come winging their way over the Pennines from the extended famly. They're all so damn efficient and conscientious. I daresay they don't actually expect one to arrive at their house from me...but I also know they probably think it should hahah. In particular the ones that arrive complete with little photos of the mini-rels and suggestions for a family get together sometime soon. Ffs I can barely get my act together to drag myself onto Facebook and say hi :P
Most of my Christmas guilt is usually centred around whatever study deadline I'm working towards/avoiding working towards/in a complete panic about. I can't deal with Christmassy stuff til that's out the way.
Talking of which: off go I to the Happy Thread :)
Family crisis. Well, my sister's family, but she is here now.
My niece has been caught lying, dating a 32 year old (a troublesome ex-neighbour with whom her parents already have a history) and self harming.
It will blow over of course.
But right now, the discovery that the little blue-eyed girl has been going behind their backs to this extend has sent explosions through the whole family.
And it's arrived here this afternoon.
Christmas looks like being pretty much cancelled :(
Anyone want to come round on Boxing Day?
Mum has food in for the 5,000, and we'll be four less than we expected. So an open invite for the first 4,996 anyway.
The above is why I might not be around anyway.
Family crisis. Well, my sister's family, but she is here now.
My niece has been caught lying, dating a 32 year old (a troublesome ex-neighbour with whom her parents already have a history) and self harming.
It will blow over of course.
But right now, the discovery that the little blue-eyed girl has been going behind their backs to this extend has sent explosions through the whole family.
And it's arrived here this afternoon.
Christmas looks like being pretty much cancelled :(
Anyone want to come round on Boxing Day?
Mum has food in for the 5,000, and we'll be four less than we expected. So an open invite for the first 4,996 anyway.
The above is why I might not be around anyway.
That's awful SG. I'm sorry about your niece. I hope she gets over this soon.
Oh my... the holidays tend to bring out the worst in some. I hope all works out for the best.
Hey, if there isn't a crisis, it isn't Christmas.
(The Cellar: putting the Crisis in Christmas.)
my left shoe is too small. wtf?
my left shoe is too small. wtf?
Why is that the funniest thing I've heard in a long time? Guess my brain is officially fried. Did you kick something with that foot, causing it to swell?
my left shoe is too small. wtf?
Get your blood pressure and your heart checked...
or shave it down a bit. Perhaps you could use a
thisThat's awful SG. I'm sorry about your niece. I hope she gets over this soon.
Oh my... the holidays tend to bring out the worst in some. I hope all works out for the best.
Hey, if there isn't a crisis, it isn't Christmas.
Thanks all. Selfishly, I am concerned about MY mood and the mood of the 'rents. We're all on a major downer, when we'd previously thought everything was rosy in our garden. Rotten of me, right? Which makes me feel worse! But also that Mum & Dad as usual have pulled out all the stops for a great Boxing Day... Which can't happen now. And again, I feel rotten for putting their expenditure on food above a teen's welfare.
I didn't mention btw that my niece is 15. And she has at least been in contact with this chap since she was 14. She claims it's only been going on a few weeks, but then she has denied everything every step of the way until proved otherwise. She still denies any physical activity although sexual images were on her phone.
I'm torn between concern for her, worry about my sister's handling of it (screaming at my niece that she's destroyed their family...?) and worry that this is being escalated to an extent that she will run away to be with him given the atmosphere at home. NOT being a parent, I have a more laissez faire approach. Not to the coupling of a 15yo to a 32 yo, but to the lies and deception. I did it at 15 (lie I mean) as did my sister (the other I mean - I read her diary!)
Oh and my 12 yo nephew of course. Who was crying his eyes out when the police got involved and saying, "Just tell her that I love her and I want her to come home safe!"
Sorry to blurt it all out.
I've just been in the house with it for hours and (selfishly) needed to vent to people who know only me in this story.
Nowt selfish about that m'dear. Or, rather, it is selfish, but we are all selfish, it's part of being human. Vent away. To them you give your concern and support; with us you can share and express how it all affects you. This is how it aught to be.
SG its a shame that something had to rain on your parade after your happy x mas tree episode. Its so hard to tell the whole family can we please love each other and have a nice time? No one has died and things can be put right I hope for you and your family.
Hugs to you SG. You're not being selfish at all, you're simply being concerned for people you love. I haven't got any helpful advice to offer - but don't be hard on yourself, in the middle of all this, hey?
Get your blood pressure and your heart checked...
no...i found a pair of shoes that were in surprisingly good condition at the bottom of my shoe pile when i cleaned a while ago.... now i remember why i stopped wearing them. the right one fits fine....the left, not so much.
Glad its the shoes :)
But I'm still not sorry about your finger
Nobody cares about my finger.
I do, keep it warm and moist.
I thought it was cool and dry.
Nobody cares about my finger.
I care about your finger. But only the good one.
Nobody cares about my finger.
I'm extrememly concerned about ur finger, and if you don't remove it soon, I will be consulting my lawyers.
no...i found a pair of shoes that were in surprisingly good condition at the bottom of my shoe pile when i cleaned a while ago.... now i remember why i stopped wearing them. the right one fits fine....the left, not so much.
What size do you wear? I might know someone who could use an odd shoe...
Tomorrow morning I have to call 5 different people to bitch about 5 different screwups, all involving money.
And my left knee is swollen up like a freaking grapefruit. No clue why.
I fell on the way to work...
Had to get x-rays on my wrist/arm/elbow... I have moved the bursa visibly in my wrist and have a 65% chance I have a hairline fracture as well. We have to see if my body will heal it on its own, or if they need to cast it. Add to that my hip took the rest of my weight.... so now the dr is worried about a bad bruise and blood clots! He is talking cast on my wrist AND physio for my hip/leg. UGGGG
I got all but 2 hrs of my shift covered at least, and I plan on going in tomorrow if possible, my store needs me. But for now its web surfing with my left hand, and icing the right side of me 20 min on 40 min off.....
That sucks Jaydaan *hugs* hope it's not as bad as they fear.
Why is that the funniest thing I've heard in a long time? Guess my brain is officially fried. Did you kick something with that foot, causing it to swell?
This got me wondering. Do people kick out with their left feet? Do left handed people kick out with their left feet?
Maybe kick boxers are good at kicking with their left feet or car sales men when testing tire meebe. ;)
@ Jaydaan. I hope you heal quickly!Yes lefties are typically left side dominant. Not as much so as righties, but still the vast majority are.
I've never thought to watch a left handed person step out on their left foot. My dad is a lefty. Now next time I see him he'll be wondering why I am watching him funny.
Try pointing at an object about 10 - 20 feet away. Then DO NOT MOVE YOUR HAND close one eye and see if you are still pointing at the object. If so, the open eye is dominant, if not the other is. Typically this will correspond to your dominant hand & foot as well.
sounds complicated
I have a better test. Hop on one foot while patting your head and rubbing your stomach. The leg your hopping on will correspond to your dominant side. You go first.
If pointing at something is complicated then you have bigger worries than which side of your body is dominant :rolleyes:
1) stress at work --god, I hate transactional stuff
2) my lips hurt. Not the ones on my face
3) BD#1's new son may have hyperthyroidism
1) stress at work --god, I hate transactional stuff
2) my lips hurt. Not the ones on my face
3) BD#1's new son may have hyperthyroidism
annoying things:
transactional stuff
biting my lip - the one on my face
and I am
sorry about the new child cloud :(
Try pointing at an object about 10 - 20 feet away. Then DO NOT MOVE YOUR HAND close one eye and see if you are still pointing at the object. If so, the open eye is dominant, if not the other is. Typically this will correspond to your dominant hand & foot as well.
My literature professor made us do this one day in class last quarter. Same lit class I shared with Brianna. Remember that, Bri?
The staff at my firm just found out they are not getting paid until next Tuesday. Ordinarily, checks would be passed out Thursday (and direct deposit on Friday). This leaves everyone without money for the long holiday weekend.
In 10 years of working here, they have never once missed a payday. I'm sure they have their reasons (year end income and accounting stuff, apparently), but this is a seriously ROTTEN thing to do to us. Some notice, so alternate plans could be made, would have been nice.
:(
That sucks, Cloud. When my ex-employer did that on two separate occasions, individuals in management were told to make personal loans of a few hundred dollars to any employee who needed it for groceries or whatever, until the paperwork got sorted out.
Pushing the payroll into the next tax year...hmm. :eyebrow:
I tried the eye pointing thing today. Turns out, I'm left-eyed. However, I'm right-handed. A study in contradictions, I am.
Cloud, that's a bunch of sux. I think Bruce nailed it. That action violates decency, but since you work in a law firm, probably no laws. I've been in the public sector so long I forget what private companies do to make the books. Business, it is above my head.
My literature professor made us do this one day in class last quarter. Same lit class I shared with Brianna. Remember that, Bri?
yeah, i do!!
I'm sick of taking antibiotics - I'm on round THREE for this sinus infection..
I think sinus cavities are a design flaw. One of MANY..
The thing is everyone knows which hand is dominant!
It is a dumb test made up by people with extra federal research grant money to spend.
left/right.
lefties tend to spin/turn clockwise and righties counterclockwise/antclockwise.
When people walk into a store, they turn right. Stores plan for this.
When people walk into a store, they turn right. Stores plan for this.
yebbut that's convention, not left/right thing. It's the other way in the UK -where they drive on the other side of the road.
When people walk into a store, they turn right. Stores plan for this.
Really? Seems like wherever I shop, people walk into a store and stop dead in front of me to have a conversation.
stores ought to plan for this.
bastards.
Really? Seems like wherever I shop, people walk into a store and stop dead in front of me to have a conversation.
Or call home, which they left 5 minutes ago, to ask what they are supposed to buy. :mad:
Really? Seems like wherever I shop, people walk into a store and stop dead in front of me to have a conversation.
That's because they are ambidextrous and momentarily confused.
they decided to give us a check we can deposit on Saturday. so, yay!
they decided to give us a check we can deposit on Saturday. so, yay!
If you hadn't spent everything you could beg, borrow, and charge, on Christmass presents.... :p
Something made me upset earlier today so I got impatient and yelled at the baby(my nephew). I feel bad about it now. :(
Ouch, that sucks. But y'know. Babies have short memories :P
What's upsetting me is the bloody snow. I am sick of it. I am getting increasingly worried that trains will be disrupted on Monday and that'll screw up my research trip. They're predicting snow right through the week and Sunday night down South. Hopefully i'm fretting over nowt, but my room was booked as non-refundable (months ago) in order to get the discount.
Could any of you guys up in PA please come down here and take yer freaking cold ass weather home to where it belongs? Thanks. Looking forward to summer in Savannah, The Merc.
Ouch, that sucks. But y'know. Babies have short memories :P
What's upsetting me is the bloody snow. I am sick of it. I am getting increasingly worried that trains will be disrupted on Monday and that'll screw up my research trip. They're predicting snow right through the week and Sunday night down South. Hopefully i'm fretting over nowt, but my room was booked as non-refundable (months ago) in order to get the discount.
Actually, my nephew is 5 yrs. old. :p As he always say, "I'm not a baby, I'm a big boy." Hehehe....I'm thinking of apologizing to him later although he may not remember what happened, just in case he does. :p I want him to grow up being able to trust me and confide in me. Yeah, I'm thinking too far ahead.
Dana: I hope the snow stops so you won't have to miss your trip. Crossing my fingers for you. :D
You are a sweet auntie Tulip. I am sure he will forgive you. We're all human like that.
and Dana, I'll keep my fingers crossed!:fingerx:
I went to an interview today. The third one at the same state agency.
At the end the one main person asked me if I had any questions.
Thinking I won't get this job either I asked for a critique. I never usually never NOT get a job offer after so many interviews and I wanted to know of any impressions. Anyway one of the women in the panel said they did not offer feedback after interviews but the supervisor allowed it told me very kindly that they have been up to 200 interviews per position because so many people were out of work. She said I did fine but that was what they were up against.
I knew the economy was bad but to hear the staggering number floored me. When I went to my car I teared up for the first time since being dislocated.
I don't say this to get sympathy because I am alright. It was just upsetting.
Can you imagine 200 people interviewing for the same job?
Can you imagine 200 people interviewing for the same job?
In this day and age. Yes. Lots of people are in the same boat.
I hear that.
Did you also hear...
Analysis of Greenland ice samples shows Europe froze solid in less than 12 months 12,800 years ago, partly due to a slowdown of the Gulf Stream. Once triggered, the cold persisted for 1,300 years.
:mg:
In this day and age. Yes. Lots of people are in the same boat.
I am sure there are more people than me who are feeling quite desperate. It's sad. I didn't feel like I was one of the desperate ones until today.The reality of the economy just hit home.
BUT
I am eating dutch apple pie with my nice hot heat on so I'm good. It's good. :)
Eh, I agree. I think everyone is just trying to do the best they can with the current situation.
Just in a bad mood.....everything is making me unhappy and upset today. :(
I hope things get better for you Tulip :hug:
Tomorrow will be better for twolips. :3way:
I went to an interview today. The third one at the same state agency.
At the end the one main person asked me if I had any questions.
Thinking I won't get this job either I asked for a critique. I never usually never NOT get a job offer after so many interviews and I wanted to know of any impressions. Anyway one of the women in the panel said they did not offer feedback after interviews but the supervisor allowed it told me very kindly that they have been up to 200 interviews per position because so many people were out of work. She said I did fine but that was what they were up against.
I knew the economy was bad but to hear the staggering number floored me. When I went to my car I teared up for the first time since being dislocated.
I don't say this to get sympathy because I am alright. It was just upsetting.
Can you imagine 200 people interviewing for the same job?
Same news here except it's more like 35 or 40 for some. Smaller town...Soon I'll be fighting to get into Burger King. :D No joke. I didn't cry after the interviews though. I realize I am up against people that have more degrees and are over-qualified for the positions I used to fill, that they are now getting hired for. I have a serious reassessment to do. I am sorry for you sky. I am going through it. It's ugly out there. I apply to ads posted on craigslist and about 3 out of 5 are fake.
I used to get hired immediately. Not so these days. It just isn't so.....
I don't even bother waiting for the phone to ring anymore. I have 2 side-jobs. They are not going to pay the bills.
off/rant
In any case, I am sending you good energy today sky!! Don't give up hope!! :)
Cicero. I appreciate your kind words and so sharing your story I can understand and appreciate the place you find yourself in.
I try not to cry and I do not usually! I hate to cry and am very stoic. I just got choked up because like you said when you are used to getting a job after an interview and don't , time after time, it is a let down in a big big BIG way.
So I had a weak moment. I am busy planning my garden and taking care of my mom.
Also I am reassessing too. Good luck to the both of us aye?
Cicero. I appreciate your kind words and so sharing your story I can understand and appreciate the place you find yourself in.
I try not to cry and I do not usually! I hate to cry and am very stoic. I just got choked up because like you said when you are used to getting a job after an interview and don't , time after time, it is a let down in a big big BIG way.
So I had a weak moment. I am busy planning my garden and taking care of my mom.
Also I am reassessing too. Good luck to the both of us aye?
No really I
should cry....lol! I'm not calling you a wuss. Crying is the perfectly natural thing to do here! Especially since it's a "holy shit" moment no one has control over. 200? Really? Holy Shit!!!!
((hugs))
lol no I don't think you are calling me a wuss. I am actually when it comes to smashing spiders and stinging bees though :)
Yes, 200! interviewees. I wonder how many applicants there were.
I have a letter given to us displaced workers by the Governor that mandates other state agencies give us an interview if we qualify for the job. I am not sure how now I am thinking it is a good idea any more. I don't know if I get an interview because it was mandated or if they would have called me anyway. I am tempted next time not to use that resource just to see. It doesn't help with getting hired. I wish there was a twist someone's arm clause in there. :P
((hugs you back ))
Ok this is what you do sky...Just walk in, find an empty cubicle, with a computer, and phone. Then proceed to start working!! lol!!
I read a story a long time ago where an investigative reporter did that at a large company he did not name. When times get tough I think of that, and laugh my butt off...Because in his case, it worked... lol! ( I wish I could find that article as it was hilarious)
Good luck to you. And I am still trying to send good energy your way. :)
200 interviews per position? What a ridiculous waste of resources. they need to employ better HR people
snow mobile?
Around here snow-mobilers support tearing down fences, wrecking ski trails, growing childhood obesity, and giving aid and comfort to enemies of the United States through stupid use of fossil fuels... Did I miss anything?
Thank you cicero. Funny story. I wish I could read it!
I'll be sending good energy your way as well.
@ monster. Really, How many brain cells does one need anyway to push papers. I am sure she said interviews and not applicants although I questioned myself whether she really said that or not.
Maybe a lot of state workers got letters and if they have one the hiring managers are mandated to give an interview * shrug* Dunno.
I know just from OSB alone there were plenty and talking about wasted resources is what ultimately caused it's demise although for years people were not given the option of OSB at IEP meetings because state schools do not fall under the 'least restrictive environment' rule. ( my opinion) Unfortunately there are not many teachers with that specialized teaching license in public schools and resources are tight anyway.
Who has the extra money to send a mobility instructor to a rural area for 2 hours a week?
Many more important things lost here than my job. The end of an era for a historic school and the end of 24/7 services for kids who really needed them.
Sorry to hear it sky. :(
I'm ok :D
I still have my see's chocolate gift card given out by blindskills.
I'm saving it for a really rainy day.:)
I'm panning a garden. Hurry Hurry spring!
I got a good attitude 99.9/10 of the time.
thank you
oh and about snow mobiles. I guess a lot of people do not appreciate them. You are one of these?
I would love to ride one.
I'm ok :D
oh and about snow mobiles. I guess a lot of people do not appreciate them. You are one of these?
Yeah. I live in the boonies for the peace and quiet. Snow-mobilers hate quiet and property rights apparently.
I guess their faster and more fun that a horse but I never knew anyone to mind a horse if you passed through their field, ..far away and quiet.
Fricking USA swimming co-ordinator for our club failed to get our entries in on time for the meet on Saturday so as a result Hebe got no entries and hector maybe got two. I'm not driving over an hour each way for one kid to swim two events. grrrrr.
Everything.
I'm in trouble.
Uh oh, Cloud. Sending you loads of luck.
no. depressed. Bruce made me cry last night (over something stupid; no, I'm not blaming you), and I've been crying ever since. I woke up in the middle of the night crying, and cried my makeup off twice this morning before I dragged myself to work.
I cannot ignore the warning signs. I need to see a doctor, but can't afford it right now, so I'm strategizing lifestyle approaches.
It really has nothing to do with Bruce or Monster or the other people here who have been stressing me out. (It just seems that way, but I know better). I'm going to try to absent myself for a while; being on the Cellar and other web sites is hurting me, not helping. For those who support me, thank you, and keep your fingers crossed.
no. depressed. Bruce made me cry last night (over something stupid; no, I'm not blaming you), and I've been crying ever since. I woke up in the middle of the night crying, and cried my makeup off twice this morning before I dragged myself to work.
I cannot ignore the warning signs. I need to see a doctor, but can't afford it right now, so I'm strategizing lifestyle approaches.
It really has nothing to do with Bruce or Monster or the other people here who have been stressing me out. (It just seems that way, but I know better). I'm going to try to absent myself for a while; being on the Cellar and other web sites is hurting me, not helping. For those who support me, thank you, and keep your fingers crossed.
so, does taking backhanded swats at them make you feel any better?
just as much as kicking people who are down makes you feel better. After 3 years here, I get this kind of assholiness from people. I'm sorry, but I don't need the aggravation.
Just tired & lonely. I've extended for another tour because I don't really have anything else in my life
just as much as kicking people who are down makes you feel better. After 3 years here, I get this kind of assholiness from people. I'm sorry, but I don't need the aggravation.
doesn't make me feel better at all cloud....but this whole '
boohoo you mean people hurt me and make me cry....but it's not you it's me and thanks to those of you who are nice'.....schtick is played. aliantha has kind of ground this one up.
if you have a problem with someone, take them on straight out. don't come at them sideways.
sorry you're feeling down, but it doesn't excuse that shit.
feel better
Sorry to hear that Sarge. Stay safe man.
Cloud, get well.
Just tired & lonely. I've extended for another tour because I don't really have anything else in my life
I'm new here Sarge- where are you stationed?
Cloud - hope all turns out well for you.
I'm in the Ninewa province of Iraq. Things aren't too bad here. I'm mainly lonely and I know that extending only puts my life on hold. Maybe I'm using this to escape from my problems, but it sure is nice having a steady pay check
How long is your extension?
how long in?
and Thank You for your Service! :f207:
Hey cloud, this is for you :)
should go nicely, and help you cut down on that grocery bill so you can afford the doctor.
Hope you feel better soon.
Take care sarge! * waves *
Hope your kids scheduler gets it together next time monster. grrr
He'll have to pay for thwarting supermom.
cheese?
( yer so mean ) xo
gotta lub dat debil
oh, it got worse... he failed to register the club and coaches for this year with USA swimming too. Dickwad. He kept trying to joke about it at the meet tonight which i was marshalling and in the end i hac to tell him that it was probably best not to talk about it now because i was really fucking mad -as well as busy.
And no-one had made sure we had enough ribbons.
I am finally learning to say "OK someone else needs to do this job, it doesn't have to always be me" and I got people to step up, but apparently it does have to always be me because neither of the jobs I passed on got fucking done despite my numerous reminders. bloody useless, the lot of them it is way less stressful just to do it all yourself.....
:thumbsup:
no. depressed. Bruce made me cry last night (over something stupid; no, I'm not blaming you), and I've been crying ever since. I woke up in the middle of the night crying, and cried my makeup off twice this morning before I dragged myself to work.
I cannot ignore the warning signs. I need to see a doctor, but can't afford it right now, so I'm strategizing lifestyle approaches.
It really has nothing to do with Bruce or Monster or the other people here who have been stressing me out. (It just seems that way, but I know better). I'm going to try to absent myself for a while; being on the Cellar and other web sites is hurting me, not helping. For those who support me, thank you, and keep your fingers crossed.
All this because I said Wheaton wasn't the only one to post that link? Yes, see a Doctor, there's more going on than the lack of Christmas gifts or cupcake posts. You, like half the people on this board, need a little help with your chemistry. It'll make life sooo much better. :thumbsup:
oh, it got worse... he failed to register the club and coaches for this year with USA swimming too. Dickwad. He kept trying to joke about it at the meet tonight which i was marshalling and in the end i hac to tell him that it was probably best not to talk about it now because i was really fucking mad -as well as busy.
And no-one had made sure we had enough ribbons.
I am finally learning to say "OK someone else needs to do this job, it doesn't have to always be me" and I got people to step up, but apparently it does have to always be me because neither of the jobs I passed on got fucking done despite my numerous reminders. bloody useless, the lot of them it is way less stressful just to do it all yourself.....
grr. I can feel your frustration. He was trying to make a joke when these kind of things play big in a kids mind.:headshake
I wish I could help you. I'd best assistant ever. I'm anal and everything. You'd worship me. Sometimes I wonder how some people hold down jobs.
Maybe they need step by step instructions. Ribbons! for the kids. How can anyone make sure there is enough ribbons or enough events. grr
no. depressed. Bruce made me cry last night (over something stupid; no, I'm not blaming you), and I've been crying ever since. I woke up in the middle of the night crying, and cried my makeup off twice this morning before I dragged myself to work.
Bruce made you cry?
If you notice bruce always does the fair and balanced reporting gig. When learning about people its good to read several of their posts back to back then it puts their online personality into perspective.
I keep meaning to ask him his astrological sign if he has one.:p
Cloud I know this online business can be tricky especially for us who come off a little cold and wonder why we get left in it. It just takes perseverance and a little personal adjustment.
BUT I can't believe you said that about bruce though. The one I would vote least likely to make anyone cry.
good luck to you
Libras make 'em all cry. Muhwahahahahahahahahahahahaha.:p
Libras make 'em all cry. Muhwahahahahahahahahahahahaha.:p
I knew it! *Points at you*
I am a Libra too.Well a day short of Scorpio. Watch it. She's got a nasty sting. nah I fails at stinging...the old grey mare an all.
I'm only half libra -does that mean they cry with one eye? :lol:
How in hell can you be half? You is or you ain't. :confused:
Funny, I place no store in birth signs whatsoever, and my oldest -Hebe, 12, just learned about them from her friends. She was horrified to learn that I had no idea what birth sign any of my children had! :lol:
My children are leo and cancer. They are tiger and dragon on the chinese zodiac.
Leo's are great people. My dad and step sister are Leo. Cancers are beautiful souls.My niece is a Cancer.
Whether you believe in signs or not at least it gives people a reason to think nice things.
The Chinese zodiac not so much as far as some of the names.
Your kids are lucky Jinx.
Leo's are great people. My dad and step sister are Leo. Cancers are beautiful souls.My niece is a Cancer.
Whether you believe in signs or not at least it gives people a reason to think nice things.
The Chinese zodiac not so much as far as some of the names.
Your kids are lucky Jinx.
So wait, you're calling out the names of the chinese zodiac thing, but are OK with CANCER as a name? WTF? What in the hell is nice about that?
You could pick the good parts.
Aries
[SIZE=-1]
Adventurous and energetic
Pioneering and courageous
Enthusiastic and confident
Dynamic and quick-witted[/SIZE]
As far as your example goes who wrote it?
among other oddities was this. I am too sleepy to know what it means. You picked a real gem bruce.
[SIZE=4][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial]Usually occupied that that searches new gates for itself.[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE]
well at least this one I can understand. May I just say,lol
[SIZE=4][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial]Vulgar, soul ajar
[/FONT][/COLOR][/SIZE]So wait, you're calling out the names of the chinese zodiac thing, but are OK with CANCER as a name? WTF? What in the hell is nice about that?
summer! and who doesn't like a harvest moon btw
please leave my selective reasoning alone
:p
Looks like a third world translation of Russian. My bad on the link,
here's all of them.
Looks like a third world translation of Russian. My bad on the link, here's all of them.
:lol2:
scales:
Humour Feeling and love for honour - in the germinal condition.
Scales like to show from itself connoisseurs of art, often write tearful memoirs.
lol
These give me a chuckle. Thanks for the link.
I'll read the rest later.:)
[COLOR=#000000][FONT=Arial][/FONT][/COLOR][FONT=Arial]
[/FONT]
The Chinese zodiac says I'm a cock.
OK.....
I'm such a scorpio...watch it, I'll sting your ass.
Chinese horoscope: Dragon. Watch it, I'll burn your ass.
Just wait while I whack you with my scales and my virginity.
What?
Ahhhh, the dreaded scales and virginity (runs away screaming)
:lol:
@ Bruce...what the hell is that link? Here's mine:
The Scorpion: very dangerous, even on distance.
Change, defraud, интригуют from one pleasure to destroy. The Sadists and masochists simultaneously. Do Not be squeamish about no facility for achievement of the purposes. Not feel sorry power and facilities, create about itself good opinion to afterwards treasonous to knock with rear. The Quarry do, going on dead body. If he has said that values the твою a friendship, signifies hour back has written on you complaint to chief.
The Scorpion adores the shallow anecdotes and pornographic filimy.
Oh my!
I'm alllllll about the shallow anecdotes and pornographic filimy.
The fucking twat that is running the step class in the big gym has her dance mix turned up to 12. I can't hear the tv with headphones in. Whore. I had to pause the treadmill to post this, I'm so mad.
Cancers are beautiful souls.My niece is a Cancer.
Whether you believe in signs or not at least it gives people a reason to think nice things.
The Chinese zodiac not so much as far as some of the names.
Why thank you sky, that is the nicest thing anyone has said to me on da Cellar... :D
No need to take an inference.
I said an explicitly nice thing about you.
hehehe evil laugh. Good luck finding the original post though.
,Merc's softer side,etc...etc..and a dozen other people who make this a truly special place to be.
Thank you all for being the wild conglomeration that you are but especially for the constant laughs.
Not so much upsetting me personally, but a cloud in the family sky at least.
Cousin Susan called to say that Uncle Charlie died on Monday.
Now Charlie was married to Mary (deceased) who was my Mum's mother's sister (also deceased). Which is why we weren't called immediately of course.
However Mum & Susan have become closer over the years, and now talk at least once a fortnight. They are only about 10 years apart, both lost their mothers, both looking after ageing fathers and have both had cancer of one sort or another.
So although I haven't seen (Great) Uncle Charlie in years, I do feel Mum's sorrow on behalf of her cousin.
Then again, he was only in hospital (this time) from Friday, and when Susan saw him on Sunday he was eating well and saying, "I'm alright, gel." So although he'd been ill for years, on oxygen and in and out of hospital, at the end he succumbed to pneumonia quickly, quietly and peacefully.
Susan was there with 10 minutes to spare after getting a call at work to say he was on his way out. So she feels no guilt at least.
RIP Charlie S.
I'm sorry for your loss, Sundae.
Re. quickly, quietly and peacefully: this is why they call pneumonia "an old man's friend".
Okay.
Turns out the problems we had over Christmas are not over.
My 15 year old niece is pregnant.
I'm trying to calm people down by pointing out she hasn't done anything more than we already assumed she did, but it's not going down well.
My Mum & sister are going through their end-of-the-world routine again. I'm not blaming them, I know this is genuinely how they feel. It's just they're hurting themselves more with this reaction. And it doesn't "solve" anything after all. And selfishly it makes my life hell of course.
Ah dear.
Teens and hormones and Catholicism. And men old enough to know better. Bad, bad mix.
Looks like it's going to be a quiet termination.
I honestly don't know whether to admire my sister for her about-face on abortion in the face of reality, or whether to be furious that her superior attitude all this time has simply been because her faith hasn't been tested. I think I'll just keep my mouth shut and let everyone get on with things as best they can.
She is 15 and he is 36? Is that right?
If so, I think he should be in jail - just my opinion.
I was curious as to the catalyst for the "relationship" to come out. This was my first thought.
Sorry to hear what you were all probably wondering in the first place.
He's 32 from what I can remember.
They considered the Police, but she would have to give evidence, and they don't want her to go through that. Mum & Dad want to cut his bollocks off though.
The relationship came out because we had adverse weather. She was caught where she shouldn't have been with no viable way home. She lied through her teeth, but they were suspicious enough to check her Facebook page before she got home and it all came out from there.
From the beginning she denied any physical activity, but they found photos on her (confiscated) phone that suggested otherwise. When this all kicked off at Christmas, Mum told my sis to keep an eye on her daughter's menstural cycle just in case... and so it came to light.
Classic is right. This guy should be behind bars.
he should. But the lass has enough of a trauma ahead of her without having to go through the nastiness of testifying.
How's thing between your niece and the family? She still the centre of a cloud of anger, or is she being emotionally supported?
Emotional support isn't big in this family.
It's more about pointing the finger at the one who rocked the boat, who ruined things for everyone, who caused the problems and put everyone else through hell. And-what-will-the-neighbours-say.
I imagine she is being subjected to white hot sparks of fury, as well as looming clouds of disappointment, and is carrying the burden of destroying both the immediate and extended family.
That's what I went through when I left my husband anyway.
The only good thing is that my nephew seems to be out of the loop to some extent.
He was happy and jolly (and farting and laughing at it) while Mum & sis had their crisis meeting. We did his RE homework on the computer - a poem about creation, chaos, sin and hope if you can believe it. I was then accused of writing it. Hello? Horrible metaphor alert?! I don't think so. I did split his stream of consciousness prose into the shape of a poem though.
They considered the Police, but she would have to give evidence, and they don't want her to go through that.
The next 15-year-old he preys on will really wish she did.
My niece has been caught lying, dating a 32 year old (a troublesome ex-neighbour with whom her parents already have a history) and self harming.
found it - I still think . . .
They considered the Police, but she would have to give evidence, and they don't want her to go through that.
The next 15-year-old he preys on will really wish she did.
that Tony is 100% correct. Accountability
Who knows if she is even the first he has done this to. Boy, it would have been nice if the last one had called the police, eh?
I suspect the problem is not that the parents "don't want to put her through it," so much as it is they don't want to face the idea that she doesn't want to press charges. They don't want to rock the boat until she gets the abortion, otherwise they risk convincing her that he really is the only one who understands her after all...
It's all part of the family ethos.
Don't show yourself up. Brush it under the carpet.
Shhhhhhhhhhh.
I think that they are blaming her for this. Because of what she's done to them, how she's hurt them. Mum said it over dinner, "I hope one day she [15 yo] realises just what she's put them [parents] through!"
I know that isn't healthy.
I grew up being fed the same lines - you're to blame, you're breaking up this family, you always have to be in the spotlight, you're just showing off because you're tired, why can't you be more like your sister.
Not saying she had any of that growing up. But she's getting it now, poor cow.
Thy can't get past the fact she lied, that she knew they [parents] hated him, so it must have been deliberate. She's not being considered as a victim, their attitude is to assume they've simply been too good to her, and this is how she repays them.
I don't even know what I think any more, after being downstairs and listening to it all again over dinner. I just know I'm glad I decided not to have children.
Poor kid. My heart goes out to her. Being at the centre of a storm feels shitty.
What was upsetting me last night: a poorly Pilau. Seemed off-colour most of the day, then was sick; brought up a load of yellow bile. It happens from time to time, so I wasn;t that worried. Then he wasn't so interested in his meal come evening, and I was stoopid and tried to encourage him to eat. Why i do this I don't know. So, he ate about a third of it and left the rest. Then about two hours later, he brought the lot up. What was really sad was it took three lots of retching to bring it up and on the third retch he did a little cry, like it really hurt.
So then he was sadsack for the rest of the evening. By about 10 o'clock he seemed to be showing an interest in the food cupboard, so I got the tiniest bit of kibble and put it in front of him, jst to see if he'd eat it. he didn't. He was clearly asking for something, but it wasnt food. So, I refilled his water; no response. Then i took him on the back street in case he wanted to do something. Nada. But when we came back in he put his front paws on the bottom step of the stairs and looked up them then at me then back upstairs. I said "Do you want to go to bed?" He looked upstairs and then back at me again. "Go on then" I said. off he went upstairs.
Followed him up and he was on my bed looking sorry for himself. I figured maybe I should just close up for the night and go to bed, so he could relax and sleep. So I made a drink of hot chocolate and went to bed. And he lay on my bed with a slight whine under his breath. Every few minutes he'd change position. Move from one part of the bed to another. Get off the bed and lie by its side. Get back on the bed. Get off again. Go to the top of the stairs and lie there. Go to a different part of the landing and lie there. Come back to the bed. Lie at the bottom of the bed, then come and flump onto the spare pillow next to my head.
Every so often he'd cry a little, and every so often I'd hear a gurgling sound. Must have had such a bad stomach ache. Poor lamb must have felt like shit.
This went on for about two and a half hours. He eventually seemed to settle to sleep, so i went to sleep myself. He was still not himself this morning.
However; this evening, having had a nice leisurely walk and a ride in mum's car, followed by a good wholesome nap, he seemed a little better. He had perked up no end by the time I was presenting him with a bowl of chicken and boiled rice. Ate the lot and was eager for more. Only gave him a small portion. I'll give him another tiny portion before he goes to bed. Hopefully whaever it was has passed now. But it was really horrid having him so distressed and unable to settle. Poor fellah didn't know what to do with himself.
With all due respect, SG, I know this is upsetting you and you need to talk about it, but I sorta feel that as she's a minor and you have previously given out personal details and posted many pics on here including your nephew, you might want to limit your discussion on the ins and out of this situation to preserve her privacy.
Aw Dana, I'd be beside myself if that was Diz.
Hope he's over it.
I now have guilt to add to the former upset.
Just been downstairs and Mum has been crying. "That's my first great-grandchild." I know she really believes that. And my sister will too. I shouldn't be so quick to judge people with different beliefs than my own. They really are hurting.
Although Mum did say immediately afterwards, "I can't believe she's done this...." So I wasn't too far off the mark.
But no. I feel rotten for trying to be all rational when they are battling their faith in trying to see a termination as the lesser of two evils - and barely getting by.
Monster, I appreciate the thought but I think the chance of anyone finding this and putting all the elements together are so low that it's not an issue. Since all this started I have not mentioned her by name, even where I have in the past it's usually a contraction of her name. Her surname is not on here (it's not the same as mine or my parents'). And there is almost nothing to link old photos with this news, apart from someone going through everything I have posted.
Some will never stop wondering who that could have been. There is no consoling those who have that belief from those that don't.
Fair enough, SG, glad you have considered it.
Update: Mr P. is feeling much better and is back to his happy go lucky self.
My hair. I really really really hate it. I'm trying to grow it long for my sis's wedding, but its just so ugly. It seems too short to get cut in a cute bob like i want, and it curls stupidly outward. It looks like a bad man's 80's haircut or something. This is it just blow dried out of the shower, which I don't want to, neither do I really know how to do anything else to it. I've tried straightening it, but that is not really any better. Trying to curl it under is too much work, and still looks like a bad 80's haircut. I think I'm gonna go to my favorite place and just ask 'em if they can try to cut it into something cute, but keep as much length as possible. If I really don't like it, I can always go get a pixie cut 2weeks before the wedding. I just feel so lost with hair though.
FOR CHRIST'S SAKE LEAVE YOUR FUCKING HAIR ALONE. YOU ARE ADORABLE.
A small smile would definitely not kill you.*
*Your results may vary. IF you die from smiling I will not be held responsible.
Get a Mohawk and Dye it Purple with Blue undertones !!
You'll be the Talk of the family for Years to come !!!
Really Zip? Are you sure blue undertones are right for her complexion? I was thinking mauve.
Get a Mohawk and Dye it Purple with Blue undertones !!
You'll be the Talk of the family for Years to come !!!
I cannot, and do not want to, outdo my drug/drunkie cousin with 3 kids she sloughs off on her mom.
Bullshit. BOTH of you were thinking
"Why is the camera pointed up so high?"
MTP: Your present hair is a workable length. Just go to a very good hairstylist. ;)
I don't think it's too short to cut into a bob, MTP. That bit curling under your left ear seems to be right about the right length, you just need to cut the back layers a bit so it's all one length. How long before your sister's wedding?
I don't think it's too short to cut into a bob, MTP. That bit curling under your left ear seems to be right about the right length, you just need to cut the back layers a bit so it's all one length. How long before your sister's wedding?
Thanks for the encouragement, I'm just lost when it comes to hair.
Her wedding is March 13. She'd be OK if I went back to a pixie cut, I just thought it would be nice to have longer hair for it. The back seems way longer than the sides. The back is down to my shoulders, but the sides are still slightly above my chin. I think I just need to stop agonizing over it and go get it cut. See how it turns out.
I think a short bob is doable too.
Bring up the back and spike out the top and sides for fun until it all grows out. You would look really cute in a bob too.
If that doesn't work just be thankful you don't have the haircut ( see link !).. apparently from the planet vulcan.
http://www.hairfinder.com/haircollections5/class-hairstyle5.jpgThe back seems way longer than the sides.
That's what's giving you the 'man from the 80s' impression. "Business in the front, party in the back" and all that. Just go get the back evened up with the shorter parts and you'll love it again.
Here's another one. There are a bunch online a stylist could do.
http://beauty.about.com/od/bobs/ss/bob3_4.htm
You look so cute in short hair anyway. ( still are cute tho )
My right shoulder is in round-the-clock pain from repetitive motion injury. I'm typing and mousing left-handed and it sucks. I have abaout 50% strength in my right hand. Calling specialist Monday.
I hate that stuff. I had a really painful shoulder elbow thing going when I was spending too much time in the car and leaning back and forth on the consul and door.
My right shoulder is in round-the-clock pain from repetitive motion injury. I'm typing and mousing left-handed and it sucks. I have abaout 50% strength in my right hand. Calling specialist Monday.
Bass playing? Computer use?
[Scatman] We called it shining...[/Crothers]
I think it's a combination of mousing too much and hauling heavy speakers.
J thinks I woke up with it Sunday morning after playing out Saturday.
I can't find my change purse that I keep my driver's license, debit card, EVERYTHING that is credit card sized. Oh, grrrrr! What a pain! I'm hoping that I just left it in my friend's car last night. Otherwise, I'm going to have to report missing all that stuff and jump through a zillion hoops and pay fees to replace it all. I sure hope my friend calls back with good news. :thepain:
I can't find my change purse that I keep my driver's license, debit card, EVERYTHING that is credit card sized. Oh, grrrrr! What a pain! I'm hoping that I just left it in my friend's car last night. Otherwise, I'm going to have to report missing all that stuff and jump through a zillion hoops and pay fees to replace it all. I sure hope my friend calls back with good news. :thepain:
Didn't you lose it once before?
Where was it the first time?
Maybe it's there?
Have you tried searching via Google's
MyHouse? It's another awesome google product.
Didn't you lose it once before?
Where was it the first time?
Maybe it's there?
The first time, I strongly suspect it was stolen - never did find it. I have a new replacement which my friend did find in her car. Yay!
I swear I'm getting early old timers'. :headshake
Do you carry that in lieu of a pocketbook/purse, or in addition?
Yeah, I just shove it in my coat pocket and don't carry a purse. I may have to rethink that, though. Maybe I'll get a chain like a watch fob and just pin it to whatever I'm wearing.
Great, I can't get my very first homework project done for my programming class. I need to download a program to do my assignment and when I go to the provided link I just get Error 404. Its a beta program and I don't know if the college computer lab has it or not...I really don't want to drive up and there find that they don't. I don't want to drive up there at all. The project is due tonight. I tried to download the program I needed last night, but when I check the zip folder it said it had 0 files. I have the assignment half done, although I was thinking of just redoing it all. I don't know whether she'll be lenient or not. If I should just submit what I have as it is, or try tomorrow and turn it in late.
Grr, I tried to not procrastinate and I still can't get shit done.
Campus will be closed by the time I get there.
Yeah, I just shove it in my coat pocket and don't carry a purse. I may have to rethink that, though. Maybe I'll get a chain like a watch fob and just pin it to whatever I'm wearing.
You can buy those ID card holders or very small wallets with a shoulder strap.
I carry a very small bag over my shoulder but there isn't anything in it except my wallet and chap stick., oh and cell phone.
Yeah, I just shove it in my coat pocket and don't carry a purse. I may have to rethink that, though. Maybe I'll get a chain like a watch fob and just pin it to whatever I'm wearing.
Or wear pants with pockets.
If I should just submit what I have as it is, or try tomorrow and turn it in late.
Shown her what you did and tell her about the 404/zip file. let her decide if you should do it over and turn it in late.
Shown her what you did and tell her about the 404/zip file. let her decide if you should do it over and turn it in late.
Amazingly enough, she answers e-mails on Sunday night. She was able to send me what I needed to download and finish my assignment. I got it turned in 3.5hrs earlier than it was due. :)
Amazingly enough, she answers e-mails on Sunday night. She was able to send me what I needed to download and finish my assignment. I got it turned in 3.5hrs earlier than it was due. :)
Yay for you! Isn't it nice when things work out.
I have a new replacement which my friend did find in her car. Yay!
I swear I'm getting early old timers'. :headshake
Great that you got it back this time!
I try to be a minimalist, I just can't stand to part with my hand sanitizer, lotion, various meds, pens, ect. I like having space to carry a book on occasion. Plus, I really like purses. :p
Yay for you! Isn't it nice when things work out.
Very very nice.
"The left ear has so many blisters, they may start popping before the medicine can work. Don't be surprised if you start seeing pus leaking out."
:thepain: My poor baby girl.
Ouch. Poor thing, that hurts so bad...
Liberal politics really grind my gears.
Conservative douchebags grind mine. What's your point?
You just made it for him, didn't you?
I think xoxoxoBruce found my digital camera... ;)
"The left ear has so many blisters, they may start popping before the medicine can work. Don't be surprised if you start seeing pus leaking out."
:thepain: My poor baby girl.
Oh God, that sounds awful. Poor baby.
I think xoxoxoBruce found my digital camera... ;)
The one with the wedding pictures in it?
What my son was he will never be again.
Ach, honey. My heart goes out to you both.
Liberal politics really grind my gears.
Conservative douchebags grind mine. What's your point?
You just made it for him, didn't you?
Who? Me? :blush:
Some people are so easy... [SIZE="1"]to rile[/SIZE]. :lol:
I'm so sorry, yesman. At least he will always have you.
The one with the wedding pictures in it?
yeah.
Some people are so easy... [SIZE=1]to rile[/SIZE]. :lol:
Yeah, there's no sport in it at all. And it's annoying to others. Go you. :rolleyes:
Yeah, there's no sport in it at all. And it's annoying to others. Go you. :rolleyes:
Hey, I agree...its fun poking the wingnuts with a stick and watch them freak out...like Merc's 10 pic childish rampage in politics or lookout's "I dont give a fuck what you think," panties in a knot rile in current events. :D
Ha, ha, yeah.... go fuck yourself.
Ha, ha, yeah.... go fuck yourself.
See how easy it is to get you riled. ;)
Isn't he cute folks? It's like he's almost likeable.
myself
1) i have no one (other than family) to celebrate my birthday with
2) i was mean to my g-ma over an e-mail forward. idk, i've tried in the past to respond reasonable and tell her why she should not fw those things, gave her links to snopes, ect. she didn't stop, so i just stopped looking at them until the other day when she sent me this one.
CLICK HERE
i sent her back a harsh reply, that she should be ashamed to spread such rascist lies and bigotry, that she should be more responsible, ect ect. she sent back reply that she was sorry and she'd deleted me from her contacts so i won't get her fws anymore. i shouldv'e called to apologize, i didn't. she called me today, left a message that she wants to apologize and to call her back. i haven't yet. although i know that i should not have been so harsh with her, i also believe i'm right.
Right or wrong, you should allow her to apologise. She might be reallly worried she's offended/angered you. Not calling her back, will seem like that apology is being flung back in her face. If you think you were overly harsh, then say so. You can say it in a way that doesn't negate your overall objection. The fight against racism and bigotry does not begin with, nor is it served by, making your gran feel small.
On a lighter note: Happy Birthday m'dear.
Happy Birthday, MTP. Come to my house [strike](in Texas)[/strike] and we'll throw you a party.
I have seen big family blow ups over my sister telling people to please stop sending countless non-substantive forwards like "lol me too" etc. on a family email distribution list, and explaining that her phone is constantly going off with every email and none of them say anything useful. Of course, she was perceived to be "in the wrong" and the response was something similar to what you got of, "fine, I'll remove your address" rather than the offended parties stopping to think "I shouldn't be using an email chain to transit pointless instant message/chat room-type comments."
Pssst: is mtp.
Her gran obviously doesn't share her view of these emails as wrong. But she is respecting her views by removing her from the forwarding circle.
You can't always change people. Sometimes you just have to accept that that's who they are. I have friends who hold racist views. occasionally they send me racist jokes in text messages. I occasionally tackle it in a gentle way. Mostly I just ignore it. It doesn't really serve much purpose to try and change them. Just hurts them or you: even more so if there is a large generation gap.
Right or wrong, you should allow her to apologise. She might be reallly worried she's offended/angered you. Not calling her back, will seem like that apology is being flung back in her face. If you think you were overly harsh, then say so. You can say it in a way that doesn't negate your overall objection. The fight against racism and bigotry does not begin with, nor is it served by, making your gran feel small.
On a lighter note: Happy Birthday m'dear.
Sorry, I didn't mean that I wouldn't accept her apology. I just wasn't sure how to handle it, I know I owed her one too for being so harsh, but not because I was wrong about the forward. I did call, it was a short convo, but we agreed to forgive and forget. I tried to be gentle and tell her that she doesn't have to send those forwards on, there is no obligation. I don't know why she feels like there is. I guess I should be more mad at the people who send my gma that shit. She's not stupid by all means, but she has a lack of education and that information kinda overwhelms her, she has a hard time sorting it out truth from fiction I think. *Sigh* Its getting more and more difficult for me to handle the people that I love dearly, but have such different beliefs than I do.
Thanks dana and flint for the bday wishes. I tried to get my mom to take me to the Ft. Worth zoo for my bday but she says the weather is gonna be too nasty :(. We're goin to Dallas Aquarium instead. I'm hoping to catch the shark feeding.
HBD MTP. My mother sends me that kinda trash but I ignore the content and just realize she has something to do and that makes her happy. I don't think she reads half the crap she sends me or else she would not be sending it. Not talking to her because she is sending crap I don't agree with would be worse than her sending the crap. :headshake
My old friend from childhood that I reconnected with on facebook still sends me right wing religious crap after me twice asking her not to. She can't bother to compose an email to me about herself - just wants to make sure I know she's jeebus' BFF.
Just backs my belief that religion is a mental illness.
Happy birthday MTP!
I think it is good your grandma is reaching out and she doesn't seem defensive.
As for the texting and the posting in lieu of a real friendship.
I don't like for my friends to constantly text me without the intention of having a real conversation. To me constant texting is like graffiti. It doesn't tell me anything about the person nor contributes to a friendship. I hate it. I am not talking about the occasional text. I am taking about things like, "I feel really bad today...._ blank."
"I am worried about so and so....__blank." " I am going here to do this or that.....__blank." Just statements without the desire or acknowledgment of any response. Finally I am WTF...You can call me if you want to talk or I'll call you but still. ___blank * crickets *
After repeated attempts asking for a normal conversation I put my foot down. ( phone down?)
One friend is offended and one friend made it right.
One 30 minute conversation with your best friend is worth a thousand simple texts.
Also extremist emails are the same as extremist talk. I stand the drama or the fear mongering. Whatever you want to call it
I think some religion is whacked. I don't think all religions are though. Some people can have one and not over spiritualize every daily occurrence.
I am not sure about political extremists though.
The inchling is under the weather today, listless and nearly immobile, now in bed. It's odd that when his energy level is up to 11 I wish he'd chill out, but when he's down to zero I realize that 11 is normal and healthy.
The inchling is under the weather today, listless and nearly immobile, now in bed. It's odd that when his energy level is up to 11 I wish he'd chill out, but when he's down to zero I realize that 11 is normal and healthy.
I know it's hard to see them not feeling well. :(
Well wishes out to the small one.
Poor li'l inchling. How's he doing today, any better?
Happy bday MTP.
My old friend from childhood that I reconnected with on facebook still sends me right wing religious crap after me twice asking her not to. She can't bother to compose an email to me about herself - just wants to make sure I know she's jeebus' BFF.
Just backs my belief that religion is a mental illness.
I'm pretty brisk with the trash can anymore. No reply no commentary just silence... kinda like troll wrangling.
I think some religion is whacked. I don't think all religions are though. Some people can have one and not over spiritualize every daily occurrence.
There are many people who have faith who don't wear their religion on their sleeve. I consider my belief to be a personal matter, and I have no interest in trying to force it on others. It is unfortunate that all Christians are often placed in the same catagory as the fundie nutters.
I think that's a fair point. However, it seems to be a trend that affects more than just Christians. Moslems get lumped in together. So do atheists.
What religion doesn't, Dana?
Everyone has preconceived notions of what a "Christian" "Muslim" "Atheist" and so on are. Lumping all of them into one thing or defining them because of their faith is part of the problem. There are good and bad among all religions. They are not all the same, no matter what their belief system may be.
Poor li'l inchling. How's he doing today, any better?
A little better today thanks, he's watching The Mikado right now with the millimeter.
I'm pretty brisk with the trash can anymore. No reply no commentary just silence... kinda like troll wrangling.
Yeah, I filter any message that has Fwd: in the subject line. It's the same as bulk "first class" mail. If you don't put a stamp on it or take the time to edit the subject line, it can't be all that important.
you'll miss out on a lot of good pr0n that way, son.
The Fucking Smoke Alarm.
JEEEE
ZUSSSS!
If your fucking smoke alarm is going off, maybe you should use some lubricant.
I had the children deal with it, they used towels.
you'll miss out on a lot of good pr0n that way, son.
I'm afraid to look at the type of porn my elderly aunts might send me, thus the filter...
doesn't make me feel better at all cloud....but this whole 'boohoo you mean people hurt me and make me cry....but it's not you it's me and thanks to those of you who are nice'.....schtick is played. aliantha has kind of ground this one up.
if you have a problem with someone, take them on straight out. don't come at them sideways.
sorry you're feeling down, but it doesn't excuse that shit.
feel better
This is me taking it up with the person who's pissing me off Jumbo.
Get a fucking life and get over it would you. I hardly post here anymore because of fuckwits like you (mainly you) and I've never complained about nasty people here. Pretty much just you cockhead. I think pretty much everyone in this place knows it's you I have the problem with, and it's you who ruins this place for me.
So there you go Jumbo. Grow the fuck up and leave me out of your thoughts for a while huh?
I'm such a non presence at this point, that if I'm single handedly ruining your cellar experience, I would suggest that you might have a little obsession problem that you need to deal with. It's understandable, I AM quite riveting.....but.... maybe ask your therapist for help?
How does one be a non presence and be quite riveting at the same time?
I know I HAVE been confused lately.
What's upsetting? Not much,,,more like unsettling.
My mom. I love love love her and she is having a hard time. I am running errands,washing her clothes and buying her take out but it just isn't making her young again.:(
I just moved her two months ago and she is thinking of a retirement home. It's sad. I'm sad.
will nothing go the fuck right today? it's been a catalog of nasty since lunchtime yesterday and there's no end in sight. the latest drip is that I just drove across town to see my daughter play cello in a quartet. Made it a couple of minutes late. didn't miss her, because she didn't play. One of the quartet didn't come to school today. We missed her chirstmas concert too due to a downed power line. Doesn't bode well for orchestra night on the 18th -the one we delayed our Florida trip for....
fuggidyfux
I am damn sick and tired of being deaf in one ear. The infection may be gone, but the fucker is still plugged up tight.
Commiseration to Monnie and Clod. Both very sucky situations:(
*hug* for Sky: must be awful hon.
Looks like he's just hanging out with Ellen Degeneres to me...
Let's not split hairs, m'kay?
lol @catalog of nasty.
@ clod...I've heard of so many people getting those.
I am deaf in one ear. I kinda like it. It makes sleeping so quiet.
@ Dana A HUGE THANK YOU! for caring.
I'm just taking one day at a time and striving for the best outcome!
I dealt with it today by buying Burts Bees face wash. I have old dry skin but for some reason the stress is making me oily at the same time. Burt's Bees is nice if you have not tried it. All natural and soothing. A friend of mine in Canada who has such dry skin it cracks uses it so I thought I would try it.
Mrs. Dallas' laptop is in need of Winblows re-installation. I picked up a hard drive at Best Buy last week. To save time I did the order on the Internet and pick up in store. Of course I never got around to it last weekend. I was going to start tonight and found... they gave me the wrong drive. Parallel ATA instead of Serial. (Almost identical packages too.) Now I get to go back and try to do an exchange with item X and a receipt that says I bought item Y.
I dealt with it today by buying Burts Bees face wash. I have old dry skin but for some reason the stress is making me oily at the same time. Burt's Bees is nice if you have not tried it. All natural and soothing. A friend of mine in Canada who has such dry skin it cracks uses it so I thought I would try it.
My SS very thoughtfully included a pack of Burt's Bees goodies in my gift :) They're wonderful. ; I got such a lump in my throat when I saw them because I've said so many times in here that bees are very special to me. I'd never heard of them before, but my eldest niece was most impressed. She has a burt's bees lip balm and says they're 'really cool'. When a 15 year old deems something 'cool' you know you've hit the jackpot :P
... I've said so many times in here that bees are very special to me. I'd never heard of them before...
Dana, you'd better sit down. There are also these things called Birds, see? and well, when a man and woman love each other very much...
It's hard to explain... better show her, Nutkin. ;)
Twisted metal.
I think I've stopped shivering at this point though, so that's good...
Son of a crap.
!!!
Photos that make you want to bust right through the screen to ask if you are OK! ?
Well you say you are shaken up and no doubt! I am glad you are alright! I don't need to ask what happened. damn snow :(
where are you? standing in the snow?
and I hope it runs warm until the tow truck gets there.
I'm worried.
No I guess you are home unless you are posting right from your blackberry. If that's possible.
No worries sky, we're all fine and home and warm now.
Goddammit! That sucks, jinx. Glad everyone's okay.
That's the guy's front license plate jammed into my wheel there.... he drove down the whole side of my car.
Shit! Be safe guys. I was just wishing we got the snow...
Holy Craptasm. That sucks. I'm glad you are safe and warm and didn't have to eat each other.
Damn.
That sucks balls! I'm glad y'all are all safe now. I would still be shaken up if that had been me. Then again, just a close call (not actual wreck) can cause me to cry/panic days after, so I'm certainly not a good meter.
I suppose of all of your babies to get hurt, the car is the toughest.
Still crummy, sorry to see that Jinx.
Wow, Jinx. Glad you are all ok.
What's upsetting me....Ebony (8yr old cat) was looking fairly miserable yesterday and not at all healthy. She wouldnt let me bring her inside, but ate her dinner.
I havent seen her all day today and I just know she has gone off to sleep forever.
Guess I'll know for sure tomorrow, its going to be high 30's here again and I know she will have curled up under the house....I have no clue how I am going get her out.
Jinx - yow :eek:! Glad you're all OK. Cyberhug to you all!
Ducks - I know how that feels. Sending hugs your way, too.
Yikes. Looks pretty hair-raising stuff. Glad you're all ok.
Still not sorry about ur finger though.
Aw Ducks....thats hard, I know.
Jinx, how are the kids now? Did they take it all in stride?
Well, we are finally getting our snow storm out West here. Not as bad as some of you guys have had - YET. I need to go to the store today - am out of some vital things. I do not have a car and am not looking forward to a slog thru the wet, cold stuff. On top of that I took a sleeping pill last night and can't wake up. I guess the snow should help with that. Maybe I can sucker a friend into taking me, but I hate to make someone go out in this mess, especially after seeing jinx's car. :eek:
Jinx, how are the kids now? Did they take it all in stride?
The kids love the jeep as much as I do (maybe more since they have no concept of car payments or frequent $40 fill ups) they hate being without it. They don't like their routine being messed up. Once there's a rental car in the driveway they'll be fine. Unless it's a mini van.
I can't find a live stream for the Superbowl. :(
is there a link to the blow by blow account of that crack up?
I totally missed all that- I hope everyone is o.k. No matter the magnitude of the accident there seems to be corresponding shock.
I hate it when people point out that it could have been worse.....So I will refrain. Still sucks. I am glad that hospitalization etc. was not necessary. :) You'll all feel better soon I am sure, but I will still send good vibes your direction!
there is a diagram
Holy Fecarundus. You were like inches away from impact. Damn. Shit. What was the story with the Asshat?
Ya, had I been driving something lower to the ground, as is the fashion these days, Jim woulda had grill all up in his grill.
I think asshat though he had the road all to himself and wasn't obeying any standard traffic protocol.
yeah... we saw it coming.....but too late to be able to do anything about it. i turned my head away and leaned left. he hit right on the front wheel/ side mirror area. right where my legs were. good thing it was in slow motion.
The f ing Colts are losing :rolleyes:
Its cool the Saints won :cool:
I'm glad that both jinx and jim are OK
Thank you toranokaze.
And I hate to keep harping on this, but look! Jesus fuck. My car is all.fucked.up.:thepain:
It hurts just to look at it. :(
Look at that wheel. That axil!
We usually do our own taxes but the two states plus fed gov thing is getting too complicated. crap we're going to end up paying someone ...
And I hate to keep harping on this, but look! Jesus fuck. My car is all.fucked.up.:thepain:
That is one nasty wrinkled piece of metal. Glad everyone is ok.
staph infection in surgical wound. blech.
Ew...yellow ooze from your head?
One of my neighbors met someone over the line, lost control of her van at high speed on ice, went off the road, and took out the gas pump and smashed the front of the post and beam barn I rebuilt a few years ago. Her arm/shoulder got dinged up and the van is totaled. It looks like no permanent damage to the barn, I need to build doors and straighten the center post. The rest of the frame just sprang back... wood is good.
Wood is good, your construction is obviously excellent. :thumb:
I'll credit some nameless patient dude with an adze 175 years ago. I just caught it before it fell.
One of my neighbors met someone over the line, lost control of her van at high speed on ice, went off the road, and took out the gas pump and smashed the front of the post and beam barn I rebuilt a few years ago. Her arm/shoulder got dinged up and the van is totaled. It looks like no permanent damage to the barn, I need to build doors and straighten the center post. The rest of the frame just sprang back... wood is good.
Those are billable hours, right?
Hey Rocky, watch me pull a rabbit outta my hat.
Actually no, but you knew that already.
I just found out that a friend of mine has SLL -- a variant of the same blood cancer that killed my dad.
My friend is 30 years old.
I just found out that a friend of mine has SLL -- a variant of the same blood cancer that killed my dad.
My friend is 30 years old.
Oh, so sorry Pie. And Fuck Cancer!
I'm sorry to hear that, Pie. :(
That sucks. Prayers in your friends direction.
less in the upsetting and more in the fucking annoying category: my sister. what a bitch. totally self-obsessed and manupulative to the point where even the kids can see it. Whines all the time (true brit) but even more annoyingly, can't do it nicely.
towards the end of a long road: beest and I are talking normally in the family room in the villa -business, not just chitter chatter -I was asked to submit a job app tonight we were firming up the content.... it's a little after midnight, so perhaps we should have started to hit a whisper..... she just hauled her bedroom door open and looking pained made out like we'd danced on her grave at 200 decibels and set her daughter on fire or something. If it's the third time you've had to ask us or 4am, fine... but it's midnight, on vac, in florida and we ain't holding a goddamn party!
btw, she's younger than me (yes, it is possible)
On a vacation like yours, this sort of thing is inevitable. Too little sleep, a lot more exercise than usual. Not that I'm excusing her behavior, but it is understandable.
Plus there's the rule, you know, that little sisters are required to be insufferably annoying.
Then Crank up THE TV as LOUD AS it GOES !!!!
if yer goibgto get in trouble at least get in trouble for SOME thing .
My mom is moving to my town. Urgh.
I can barely stand her 2,250 miles away -- how the hell am I supposed to deal with her within striking distance?
Expect more (venting) posts from me.
I'm gonna start the laundry in a few minutes..... ;)
(I do have permission though.... we got brownie points for realizing their daughter would be in bed when we came in and instructing our kids to be quiet)
throw some tennis shoes in the dryer !!!
WUMPA THUMPA WHUMPA THUMPA !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Plus there's the rule, you know, that older sisters are required to be insufferably annoying.
Fixed it for ya.
Not dissing Monster, just referring to my own family sitch.
Wait, I'm older than my bro. Oh. Yeah, that rule still works :)
Plus there's the rule, you know, that little sisters are required to be insufferably annoying.
This is true. I am a little sister. I count as my duty to annoy my bro.
My mom is moving to my town. Urgh.
I can barely stand her 2,250 miles away -- how the hell am I supposed to deal with her within striking distance?
Expect more (venting) posts from me.
You are not, by any chance, Mrs. Squirell Nutkin, are you?
Bloody hiccups.
Not literally.
Just bloody annoying.
You are not, by any chance, Mrs. Squirell Nutkin, are you?
Nope. Puppet of a different dwellar -- the nick should be a dead giveaway. But don't out me. :)
You're the square to the other triangle?
we lost the brownie points because our 12yo interrupted the nightly 30 minute bedtime ritual offering a parting glowstick bracelet (as promised earlier). there are a zillion other things. Even beest gets annoyed, it's not just me......
Nope. Puppet of a different dwellar -- the nick should be a dead giveaway. But don't out me. :)
Ooooh! Lets guess who Cake is. Is it Pie? :D
Even beest gets annoyed, it's not just me......
Holy shit, if beest gets annoyed after what he has to put up with at home... :mg:
Holy shit, if beest gets annoyed after what he has to put up with at home... :mg:
exactly. i think he loves me all the more now, seeing what could have been.....
:thumb2:
From what you said over yonder, it sounds like the kid may be OK, in spite of her mother. Hope so, anyway.
CAN'T FIND THE TIX TO TAKE THE BOYS TO STICKS AND PUCKS THIS AFTERNOON TO TRY OUT THEIR NEW SKATES, AND TIME IS RUNNING OUT.... :(
evidently also can't find caps unlock key...... :rolleyes:
Handy tip if you're travelling - Japanese and some other Asian keyboard layouts require you to hold down the shift key while pressing caps lock to toggle the CAPS LOCK. So if you unwittingly do this by mistake the first time, pounding the caps lock key will not help undo it. You can, however, type your whole email holding the shift key down. :p
I am so mad I could spit nails. I paid my electric bill on the 4th of this month, as always. I have had run ins with them before because the bill is officially due on the first. If you don't pay on the 1st they add a $20.00 late fee. I have explained to them until I am blue in the face that my check comes on the 3rd or 4th and that it is impossible for me to pay sooner than that. I don't see how it can be legal for them to add what amounts to a surcharge of $240.00/year to my bill just because I don't get paid on the first. And, no, I don't have the money to pay a double electric bill one month to catch me up.
So Saturday, I get a bill from them for $130.00 (huh?) that must be paid by Tuesday the 9th or they will disconnect my electricity. I have just paid all my bills, including rent and there is no way I can give them that amount unless I go without food and medicine. Two days does not give me time to get a payment from LEAP or other agencies that help with utility bills. I don't know what on earth I am supposed to do. I guess I can light my house with coleman lanterns and give all the food in my freezer away, so it won't spoil. This is just outrageous. I have all my receipts from the past 6 months, and I don't understand how they can do this to me. Oh. GRRRRRR! :thepain:
I'm so sorry Sam. I've never heard of electrical surcharges.What's up with that? It's not like they have to ship electricity in.:eyebrow:
Call them up and talk to them. Have them explain it to you. Then explain your situation to them. And if you don't get a reasonable resolution, hang up. Call back a few hours later when a diffeent shift will be on. But talk to real people rather than dealing with computer-generating automatic billing. ask to talk to a manager if you're still strugging after the second attempt.
And your food will be fine in your freezer for quite a while, just don't open it more than is necessary.
Oh and a bill on Saturday (6th) is likely to have been mailed before your payment on the 4th was processed ...that's why i say speak to real people and have them explain it. they can tell you if that's the case)
That ain't a euphemism is it?
People who think that screaming at you changes anything. Also, people who never get their mail until it is officially in the hands of a government entity that won't take "no one told me" as an answer.
:(
Got in an accident Saturday (noone was hurt) - definitely not my fault, but cop wrote me the ticket. Don't wanna go to court, but don't wanna admit guilty if I'm not.
And today would've been my dad's 73rd b-day. Happy b-day pops.
Very tired and beaten. I'm really tired of working a job where I help people, get paid, and then have to give the money back 6-8 weeks later if the people change their mind. Makes it pretty hard to budget your own life if you never know if the money is yours or not.
Ripped my nose ring/bone out with a towel and lost it thru a crack in the floor damn it.
Ripped my nose ring/bone out with a towel and lost it thru a crack in the floor damn it.
shopvac?
The cracks in our floor go all the way thru, so it's in the basement somewhere, probably behind the oil tank. I ordered a new one from amazon and have a big stupid looking silver hoop in until it arrives.
and have a big stupid looking silver hoop in until it arrives.
Made me laugh.
Pics?
Made me laugh.
Pics?
edited for clarity...jinx is not upsetting me today. yet.
?
What's bothering me today: I will never live in Portland, Oregon.
What's bothering me today: I will never live in Portland, Oregon.
What brought this up?
BTW, Seattle is even nicer - IMO. Now that you mention it, it does make me sad that I will never live in Seattle again.
edited for clarity...jinx is not upsetting me today. yet.
Looks ok to me. Though I do like the tiny diamond you sometimes see.
What do you normally wear?
I've had one of these in for... 8 years or so. This hoop is just more... more. And silver. I don't even remember buying it. The gold version must have been too expensive or something.
I've had one of these in for... 8 years or so. ...
If that were .... 9 inches long ... what you've said here would be astonishing ... :o
What brought this up?
BTW, Seattle is even nicer - IMO. Now that you mention it, it does make me sad that I will never live in Seattle again.
On a blog I read, someone's asking for travel tips to Portland. Man, I love that place. I love Seattle, too, but Portland's better (i
mo).
:idea:
I need to drag my husband out there for a trip. Maybe I can get him to share my obsession.
"She's got everything a girl might need,
She's a tribal animal yes indeed,
But she hasn't got a bone through her nose,
Through her nose.
She hasn't got a bone through her nose"
If it ain't one thing, its another. I have to go get a tooth pulled this afternoon. Oh, the pain! If I survive, I'll let you know.:thepain:
Leave it under your pillow and get your money back.;)
I think the dentist kept it for his pillow. He says the space where the tooth was is really going to hurt when the local wears off. He gave me some heavy duty pain killer for when the agony kicks in. I can't wait. Also if I seem wierder than usual you'll know why. :3_eyes:
Kept it? What a rip off, I'll bet he's got a woodie for the tooth fairy. :yesnod:
yeah you have to ask them if you want to keep your teeth. Beest asked for his wisdom teeth, the dentist thought he was weird
Thank you for submitting your volunteer application!
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That was in response to my SPCA application. Fuck.
Aww crap. Bad luck Moar :(
Fuck cancer. Friends of mine lose their loved ones to it too often. That is all.
stupid fucky fucking cancer.
A good friend lost his mother yesterday to cancer. 61 years old. Way too young to go and needlessly suffered for too long. The toll on the family was and still is a terrible burden. I am so sorry for their loss.
And the bad news just keeps on coming. My uncle Frank - my mother's brother passed away on Wednesday.
Wow – I haven’t been here in a while. So this sucks monkey balls, the company I’ve been with for 20yrs is closing. We’re a union mechanical contractor and most of our work was government funded contracts. Unfortunately, here in the south the govt. hasn’t had a lot of work going on this past year, well not what we do. Plus, it’s been an uphill battle for the past couple of years, because of a few bad decisions. Anyway, I’m talking with a welding inspection contractor who needs someone to work in their office and we’ve done work with them before so they know me and know the work I’ve done here. Hopefully, I’ll be able to make a smooth switch.
Man, Pete. :( It sucks to have so many terrible things pile up like that. I'm wishing you strength.
Compared to other people's sorrows, this is a whine.
I'm posting it to get it off my chest, and in the hope of some wise words.
Mum has a group of friends that meet up every month or so. Nothing official - some are still in the Police and therefore the meetings have to fit in with their shifts. But when they can, they host meals for eachother.
Mum decided it was her turn, despite misgivings - she is ashmaed of this house and what she has compared to people in a similar income bracket. I don't know if I hear this more because I live with her, or whether she just feels it more as she gets older and more bitter.
Anyway.
After various conversations about what other people have done and what Mum herself likes, we settled on a tapas evening. Yes - we. I was going to be involved up to the minute the guests arrived. I was completely happy with this - they are a group of friends of about five years standing, I had no intention of muscling in!
I had a couple of dishes already sorted - patatas bravas, meatballs, anchovies, dipping sauce and bread, rice, Spanish omelette. I talked Mum out of making a chicken casserole as a dish, because it doesn't work in a tapas menu, but agreed chicken wings would be appropriate. Once numbers were confirmed I was potentially going to look up a white fish recipe (something Mum loves when we eat tapas in a restaurant) and/ or a sardine dish.
I'd even been online looking at Spanish tablecloths - second hand eBay of course! - and various things to theme the evening without going overboard. I was even going to dye some eggs (I'm doing some for Easter, so they're on my mind) and use them as mini containers for egg-salad topped with roe.
So today I asked Mum if we were going to Thame (a local town) on Tuesday. It's their market day, but we were going to check out the up-market delis and supermarket. It was cancelled before I went away because Grandad was ill.
"I'm not doing that" said Mum. What? Now going to Thame? "I'm just doing fajitas"
And that was that.
I'm hurt, offended and disappointed.
When was she going to tell me? Did she not realise I was looking forward to this as a mother & daughter thing and would be taking on 90% of the work? And if she's just going for an easy option (which someone has already done anyway) why doesn't she just order in Chinese?
When I am less upset I will say - please do tapas. I will take on all of it, just give me a budget. I will really enjoy it - I so much miss being able to cater and theme.
I doubt it will come to anything - when Mum closes a door she double locks it, bolts it and checks the windows too.
I am trying not to sulk. The childish part of me thinks, "Sod you, not only will I not help with your fajitas, I'll not help with any dinner you make in the near future - I will cook and wash up after myself and you'll regret cutting me out of your planning in future. I will make you suffer for hurting me."
I know that is wrong and stupid.
I am fighting that reaction.
Help me put this in perspective.
...
I know that is wrong and stupid.
I am fighting that reaction.
Help me put this in perspective.
Not sure I can help SG. Does your Mum know how much she's hurt you? Did she think she was saving you some bother? Did she simply not realise how much you were looking forward to doing it? Is she afraid she'll appear to her friends to be over-compensating for the house with a fancy spread?
Perhaps you can go for a brisk walk on your own-io to calm down, and then try what you've said - offer to do to all within her budget?
Hugs, dearie!
Pull back, SG. Sounds like you took the reins from you Mum and she thought twice about it and wanted them back. For perspective, detach from what you need/want from this.
The cracks in our floor go all the way thru, so it's in the basement somewhere, probably behind the oil tank. I ordered a new one from amazon and have a big stupid looking silver hoop in until it arrives.
from Amazon? oh, Jinx, why didn't you ask me? nose bones are evil, anyway, and what is the material?
Ask you what? No they aren't. Gold.
SG
(Please note, I'm trying to look at this from your mother's perspective, inorder to maybe help you see another POV and hurt a little less/not get so hurt in the future).
You say you had no intention of muscling in, I'm sure that's true, but seems to me to be exactly what you did, especially "talking her out of making a chicken casserole". and the rest of the prep is I I I I I .... I do a similar meal thing with my friends, I'd be real peed off if some-one took over like that. Granted, I would say so from the start, but I'm probably somewhat more bolshie than your mum.
Ebaying new (to you) tablecloths? Way OTT. If she already feels ashamed of her house and what she has compared to other people, suggesting she needs extra to impress is more likely to reinforce this, rather than allay that fear -especially if you have to buy second hand to do so.
Did she not realise how much her decision/change of plan hurt you? Probably not -it hasn't been a mother-daughter thing up to this point (as in -in all the years she's been doing it, not your relationship as a whole), it's her lunch with her friends. And how is it a mother-daughter thing if you're making all the decisions and doing 90% of the work? Maybe she knows she would feel awful if you did all the work and yet didn't join them for lunch, but she justs wants to have lunch with her friends? So she decided to do it herself, not realising you had pegged it as a mother-daughter thing.
It's clear you love to plan, shop and theme. But maybe you should back off a little on doing it for your mum if it's going to hurt you so much when she rejects it. Remember, she's been living without you for a long time and that your coming "home" for a while was primarily for your benefit rather than hers -that doesn't mean she'ds not loved having you closer, but it does mean that her return to the mother-daughter-same-roof relationsship was somewhat less voluntary than yours.
I can't really help you get over this one, but my suggestion is why not ask the school where you volunteer if they'd be interested in you theming, planning and shopping for some event for them? Maybe a MayDay celebration or a summer sports day? Or a fundraising evening -I bet a Tapas bar would go down a treat there, so all the work you did for this need not go to waste. Or perhaps there is a local residential home who would appreciate a tapas night and would have a small budget to fund it?
Or why not go the whole hog and place an ad offering your services as a Tapas party planner. Maybe self-employment in this direction is the key to your future?
I'm sorry you are hurt, but perhaps your mom is just feeling a little suffocated by your love and attention and doesn't know how to verbalize let alone act on that knowledge.
I talked to her about it today.
Still trying to talk her round a little.
But she has decided, as I expected.
It really wasn't that she thought I was taking over - at least that's not what she says and it rings true. She just thought it was "too much bother". Again, it's a clash of personalities. She thought I over-planned my trip to Amsterdam, but for me it was an extra five or six months pleasure I milked out of a six day trip!
So the more I made suggestions re what we could do, the more worried she was by it, and the more I tried to reassure her that it wasn't a bother and I'h handle it, the more she felt I was making too much of a meal (!) of it.
So we're doing fajitas, and I'm allowed to do the starter :)
I'm not going to bombard her with suggestions and ideas this time, so she has no reason to feel overwhelmed.
I'll just keep my head down and do what is most helpful on the day. And if I sneak a few table decorations in, it's not going to hurt, eh?
Am much less consumed by the whole thing today. Sorm in a taco shell. Sorry, and thanks for the replies.
@ Jinx; unless you have a very well healed and stretchy nostril piercing, nose bones can cause a lot of trauma when removed because of the bulb on the end. If your nose likes it, then fine, but most people nowadays tend to stay away from nose bones.
gold should be fine. If you ordered a stainless or some off brand thing from Amazon, that would not be good.
I was happy with the last bone for 8 years, I guess you missed that part... although jim did make me bleed ripping the ring out with pliers. It's fine now.
I've had many other bits of nose jewelry (was first pierced at Zipperhead, with a gun[gasp!] back in 1990. Nothing is as good as a bone.
Cloud it teh authoritay on piercing. RESPECT THAT!
What's upsetting me today? Well, since you ask it is the strong possibility of a new high speed railway line being built between London and Birmingham that will pass about a quarter of a mile from this very spot.
Trains are planned to travel at 200+mph and much of the track in the immediate area will be on a flyover or embankment. Very little can be done about noise abatement in these circumstances and trains will pass about every 4.2 minutes. Journey times will be reduced by about twenty minutes. Couldn't people just get up a little earlier?
Apart from anything else, the whole pointless caper will cost about £30 billion. Has nobody told the sanctimonious Transport Minister, Lord Adonis, that the country is stony broke?
We haven't had a Peasants' Revolt here since 1381 so I think it is about time for another.
Carruthers. (Off to sharpen his pitch fork):mad::mad::mad:
Thing is, Car, I'm on the other side.
Anything that brings down house prices in Bucks is okay by me.
If it means I can rent a place and still live close to the 'rents (not possible at present) I'm all for a little train noise. Have you seen how close the new flats are being built to Aylesbury Station? They'll not only have trains in their living rooms, they'll have annoying announcements they can't make out (well, I never can) in their bedrooms. And they are still out of my price range!
A train to Brimingham every 4.2 minutes? I do question your source, chick. That's less waiting time than on the Piccadilly Line for sure. I doubt there are that many people in the country who need to get to Brum that quickly (yes I know it's a major rail terminal and people would be travelling onwards, I am being facetious).
One of the problems is that people across the country are clamouring for high speed rail links to London.
I know, because we have been trying to get one over here for several years and my inbox is full of emails from people pushing for it, and trying to get every local politician (down to the lowliest Parish Councillor) to lobby the Transport Minister on their behalf. Our MP receives semi-regular petitions for such a link.
Damned if you do. Damned if you don't. But whatever you do: not in my backyard.
[eta] That sounded a little more harsh than I'd intended carruthers. It does suck if you happen to live just next to the new line. But it has to go somewhere (if you going to have it at all, and there are huge economic arguments for doing so) and someone's house is going to be near. We are not a b ig enough country for this stuff to veer miles away from towns and villages. The only places you could take it to get far enough away from conurbations that it doesn't affect somebody, would put it right into the heart of the Greenbelt, and that would upset even more people. And even then it would have to meet up with the populated areas at some point in its journey.
I sit on a planning committee every three weeks. It's fascinating, but there is a lot of NIMBYism. Everyone wants our country to up its use of renewable energy; but nobody wants a wind turbine within ten miles of their house.
SG and Dani,
Good afternoon to you both.
OK Sundae first.
Have you seen how close the new flats are being built to Aylesbury Station?
Yes, but in that instance the railway was there first and the flats were built, as I'm sure you know, on an old industrial site (Schwarzkopf). Eyebrows were raised, not without good cause, when planning permission was granted for a residential development so close to the railway. That said, the trains that run from Aylesbury to London are humble commuter stock of three or four carriages. The proposed 200+mph trains on HS2 will be 400m long. Admittedly you won't hear them coming; the first indication will be the 'whoosh' from the pressure wave and then the train noise itself.
A train to Brimingham every 4.2 minutes? I do question your source, chick. That's less waiting time than on the Piccadilly Line for sure.
That's fourteen trains an hour, ie seven in each direction or one train movement every 4.2 minutes.
I picked that up from the Bucks Free Press website.
LINK
Dani.......
[eta] That sounded a little more harsh than I'd intended carruthers.
Don't worry. I've got broad shoulders. It's my Yorkshire/Viking ancestry that does it you know.;)
The only places you could take it................ would put it right into the heart of the Greenbelt,
Unfortunately, the proposed route is right through the Metropolitan Green Belt and the Chilterns Area of Outstanding Natural Beauty. Both are statutory designations designed to protect the area.
Have a look at this
Google Street View picture.
The line will pass left to right in the middle distance of this view. OK it doesn't have the scenic grandeur of Snowdonia or North Yorkshire, but surely it's worth protecting?
Anyway, just my two penn'orth.
All the best,
Carruthers
That streetview looks like my part of the world.
That streetview looks like my part of the world.
Whereabouts are you from, Griff? I hope you don't mind me asking.
Carruthers
North-Eastern Pennsylvania (NEPA). We have a lot in the way of green rolling hills and hedgerows.
Is there a bustle in your hedgerow? Don't be alarmed.
Thanks for that, Griff.
I'll explore the area on Street View later on and do my best to wear out Google's server.
I wondered if you were going to say Virginia. Friends lived there for a while on an RAF/USAF exchange posting and they said that the scenery was similar to here.
Carruthers
Is there a bustle in your hedgerow? Don't be alarmed.
Yes, I see what you mean!
:blush:
Have a look at this Google Street View picture.
Carruthers
my god, look at all that land going to waste. Such a shame to see all those trees, grass, and crops, on what could be perfectly good parking lots. :haha:
my god, look at all that land going to waste. Such a shame to see all those trees, grass, and crops, on what could be perfectly good parking lots. :haha:
Don't think that it hasn't already been suggested.:sniff:
Carruthers
Car, like Dani I really do appreciate how awful it must be to be in situ when something like this happens. My example of the flats in Aylesbury was not to suggest "worse things happen at sea!" merely to illustrate my own poverty.
I'm still amazed at how many trains they plan to run to Brum an hour though. Not that the BFP is an unimpeachable source. Or even sauce. Still , at least they'll go by in a flash (weak joke).
Upsetting me today is Aylesbury in the press for all the wrong reasons. As it will be on May 1st (Dads' 70th in case you want to send a card). The EDL are intending to march in the town. That's
English Defence League. I've not linked directly to their site as I don't want to promote them, even amongst curious minded adults. Formed to counter the rise of Islamic fundies in this country. Sadly, attracting hooligans and
British National Party and
ex-National Front members.
If they were for what they
said they were for I'd accept their presence in the town, even if I'd still be wary. They claim to be against fundamentalism and terrorism. And for traditional English values. Something the British muslims I know would be happy with. If their social calendar promoted country dancing, Morris dancing, cheese rolling, bog snorkelling and jam making, I'd be all for it. I don't buy the right-wing red-top conceit that we are being overwhelmed or forced out of our own country at all. Chicken Tikka Masala anyone? Pro-traditional arts and crafts does not equal anti foreign influences.
Anyway, the English have always been magpies. If the school I worked at suddenly had classes in applying henna (not likely with three of fewer non-Caucasian children per class) I'd sign up for it!
So, I'm drifting. If the march happens we'll be the focal point for a clash of cultures and races. And although the Aylesbury population is nowhere near as laissez faire as Leicester (Ranjula Takodra is our second Asian mayor - Raj Khan being the first, a frequent visitor at our house) we've had a history of street violence going back to the '70s. Aylesbury was once mentioned in a House of Commons speech as a place you dare not venture after a certain time due to "yobs".
I worry for my quiet little county town.
Aylesbury was once mentioned in a House of Commons speech as a place you dare not venture after a certain time due to "yobs".
If I'm not mistaken, it was the then Home Secretary Douglas Hurd who made that speech which included the first recorded use of the term 'lager lout'.
I suppose he has to be remembered for something:eyebrow:
Carruthers
That Brum link was sorely needed when I left nearly 10 years ago. The motorway (?M42 -so happy to have forgotten the number) was a car park, and the trains ran so infrequently that they often couldn't take all the passengers waiting.
I'm sure I'd be a total NIMBY, but if London can't expand further, then the transport system needs to, and a lot of the commmuters were people with dual bases -London and Birmingham. If it were the US, they'd just fly.
That Brum link was sorely needed when I left nearly 10 years ago. The motorway (?M42 -so happy to have forgotten the number) was a car park, and the trains ran so infrequently that they often couldn't take all the passengers waiting.
I'm sure I'd be a total NIMBY, but if London can't expand further, then the transport system needs to, and a lot of the commmuters were people with dual bases -London and Birmingham. If it were the US, they'd just fly.
The M40 runs from London to Brum and the M42 connects it with the M6 to the east and the M5 to the west.
The trouble is that traffic, like work, expands according to the capacity available to meet it. There has to be a time when it is no longer reasonable, or even feasible, to build yet another massive road or rail project.
If the nation was the size of France it might be a more practical proposition. Of course in many parts of the USA the country could quite happily swallow up a vast civil engineering project without inconvenience or detrimental effect on a massive scale.
I'm not suggesting that HS2 should be dumped on somebody else, just questioning the need for it at all.
All the best,
Carruthers
You know what?
I disagree with this Carruthers chap's opinions, but he seems like a pretty good egg.
Good on you for not frothing at the mouth about something which obviously affects you very personally. Want to meet up for a pint?
Yep. He is a very palatable character. Good for the Cellar.
He does seem to be a good guy.
How the hell would you know?
:bolt:
I like carruthers. I like his style.
If I had my druthers
I'd pick Carruthers!
hip hip hooray!
(let me know if you ever need a campaign manager)
Yeah, I agree...Car seems pretty cool. :)
Those axe murderers will fool you every time. :lol:
Pshaw! what if we happen to like axe murderers eh? You ever think of that? Smartypants.
Well chop you, Ma'am. :p:
How the hell would you know?
:bolt:
You can run, but you can't hide! :borg:
Those axe murderer[COLOR="Red"]ing hobos[/COLOR] will fool you every time. :lol:
gotcha covered
Hey, if Bruce wants to come to the UK I'll meet up with him!
His only flaw is not living within four miles travel.
I'd shake-shake-shake his beard off if he ever landed Brit-side :)
*smack upside your head*
;)
Thanks for the kind words everybody. One blushes to the roots of one's prematurely grey hair.:blush::blush::blush:
Now, Bruce. Have you felt the weight of a decent size axe these days? Far too much effort involved in waving one of those around.
Then there's the risk assessment to be completed under the Health & Safety Act (1974) (as amended). Not to mention the compulsory Public Liability Insurance, and the Certificate of Competency to be obtained under the Lethal Weapons (Manual application of same) Act. Of course a special permit will have to be obtained if it is intended that the axe be used during the hours of darkness.
It's bureaucracy gone mad, I tell you.
Sundae, I might be able to meet some time soon, but I'm worried about leaving my aged father on his own. He had a knee replacement op about eighteen months ago and it is giving him some trouble. If he has a fall while I'm out my name will be Mudd.
Hope I'll be able to take you up on the invite in a couple of weeks.
Carruthers;)
My sis went to one of the E-care places last friday, they thought she has strep throat so they tested her, it came up negative. They were still convinced it was strep and sent her home with antibiotics. It was obviously NOT strep, it was virus, probably the flu, she finally went back to the doc today. Whatever the virus was she is almost over, but she has a secondary infection: bronchitis and borderline pneumonia. Fuckin E-care asswipes! She just got married on Mar 13 and has been sick for the majority of the time. :(
My stepson, as it turns out, has turned into quite the little sexist. The majority of the time he lives in a house with 4 not-particularly-bright, hyper-emotional women... and he's apparently extrapolated what he's learned therein. Fucking great.
Maybe if you said something to him like, "Lissen, us broads aint' all knuckle heads, ya know."
Who knows? It's worth a try.
Freakin Sean Hannity and giant entourage or some shit decided to go to Old Navy today too. Took me frigggin forever just to buy bathing suits.
At least my (ultra conservative) gym is a ghost town, lol....
Maybe if you said something to him like, "Lissen, us broads aint' all knuckle heads, ya know."
Who knows? It's worth a try.
Ah, see, but he's got this
noblesse oblige thing going on. He doesn't want me to not be a knucklehead, because that means I might possibly know more than he does. He doesn't respect intelligence in others, he just likes people to defer to him.
drown him.
[COLOR="PaleTurquoise"][COLOR="paleturquoise"][COLOR="SlateGray"]FFS child protection services people, I'm not SRS. RLY.[/COLOR][/COLOR][/COLOR]
Ah, see, but he's got this noblesse oblige thing going on. He doesn't want me to not be a knucklehead, because that means I might possibly know more than he does. He doesn't respect intelligence in others, he just likes people to defer to him.
Nothing worse than being condescended to by a person who needs you to drive him places and cook his meals.
How old is this child, 'fob?
Just turned 8. It's an irritating age all around, so I haven't given up all hope for him just yet.
Oh grief, same as Thor, yes don't give up. It's all about gender roles/differences at that age. First time they've noticed, but they don't all get it completely and there's a lot of peer pressure going on, so they conform as best they can.
My cop friend got slashed open with a knife last night. He's home and recovering, he claims it wasn't a big deal. I'm still pretty freaked out.
My sister is still really really sick. I'm taking her back to the doc tomorrow (for the 3rd visit) for a chest x-ray. Guess we'll find out if she has bronchitis, pneumonia, or something else.
My oldest-time friend was suppose to come to town for 11days at the end of the month, she had to cancel. Her cat has cancer, its pretty awful.
Hang in there, MTP. Sending supporting vibes your way!
My boxer got kennel cough... and she wasn't even around any dogs. The downstairs neighbours had a few dog visitors in the past week, but no one new to the yard. BAH $98 to say yes, she is sick, and here is a week's pills.
Oh and better book an ultra sound and X-ray, cause her heart murrmur is "very loud" YIKES!!!!! So instead of going on a 4 day holiday at the end of the month, its going on my baby's vet bill.
Obviously a very strong evil power doesn't want you to take a vacation. Better cancel before more bad shit happens. :eek:
Yup, cancelled. We were supposed to go to a cabin with 3 families for my son's 20 birthday (his first with us in 5 years) Since we planned it, one family cancelled, a guy quit work, so my son and I have to work part of the 4 days off, and Freya got sick....
So, now its a party on Sat the 17 for my son, low key (which is more his style) and a vet visit on the 21st to find out how bad the murmur is.
Real life always comes first, we were just hoping for a few days as a family... where there was not a TV, Computer, Work, Playstation 3, Playstation 2 or a Wii to distract us.
Snatch out All the power cords , and Phone cords , put one of these on yer door , and ignore the Knocking
Zippyt is so subtle. :haha:
Oh! i want that sign lol.
MTP - all fingers crossed for your sister. At least she's getting medical attention. Here's hoping it's something which will pass quickly.
My Great Uncle John died last night. Grandad's second sibling in the last two years, and the baby of the family. The five of them seemed to have charmed lives until Auntie Alice died - they were all in their eighties and all compos mentis.
Of course no-one lives forever, but the Doyles were giving the impression of immunity for a while.
We didn't really know John - not like Auntie Alice, who was very much close family - but I feel it for Grandad.
I have to break the news to Mum when she comes home. Again, I know it will hit her mostly because she'll have to tell her dad. And she leaves for Spain for five days on Saturday. I'll have to make sure to visit him every day, instead of the usual every other day.
Trolls and troll minions and the tolerance of same upsets me today.
That, and I'm getting a ct scan on my head. Doc ruled out the usual suspects. Mo money.
My phone is about ready to be turned off...the one bill I just can't swing since my recent financial fucking. The others I've been playing roulette with.
Life is good. Work hard, get ahead, get knocked back down again. I'm sure somehow it's all my fault.
my recent financial fucking.
I didn't know about this. I thought you had a nice relatively new job with better pay? What's this about financial fucking?
I had some emergency dental work done. Out of pocket was very expensive, but it wasn't elective. I can hardly go to work without front teeth (all due to an accident I had in 2nd grade...the work my parents worked so hard to provide wouldn't last forever.)
Then there was a tax fiasco.
You know, the little expenses, and big, that add up and take you right where you were before.
I know I'll get through it, and catch up eventually (BECAUSE of my new job without which I could not have had my teeth fixed!) but then the ct scan really started to scare me and I got that "everything is looming" feeling.
I'm sorry, I'm just whining. I know things could be so much worse.
I'm sorry, I'm just whining. I know things could be so much worse.
Things could always be worse for everyone, and that doesn't keep this thread from reaching over five thousand posts. That's why it's here. Gripe away. I'm sorry about the tough financial times, but at least your teeth look great.
:D
A smile with my new caps.
Hey Shaw. Kick em in the cunt.
yeah, Shaw; just give 'em the old Cunt Punt, it'll make ye feel better.
I'm sharpening my foot for the cunt kicking. I'm not so worried about anything being wrong...because I'm stubborn and will fight the fuck out of anything that comes my way...it's just the matter of going through it all.
Thanks guys. You can't know what your kind words, and suggestions of cunt-kicking, mean to me. :)
My father's state of health is a worry to say the least. He had a knee replacement operation about eighteen months ago and is now experiencing a lot of pain in the area. Of course whatever is causing it, might have nothing to do with the new joint. The doctor said that the symptoms led him to consider the possibility of a slight fracture so off he went to the local hospital for an X-Ray. There's no fracture but deeper appraisal of the image and other investigations are now on the cards.
I look at dad sometimes when he's asleep and realise how much he has aged recently. He's eighty-four and in many respects isn't doing too badly but I find it all rather depressing. My mother died last August after a long period of ill health and since then I've had
some respite from various worries. I just hope that dad isn't now declining.
DanaC has written a beautiful poem to her Dad and reads it in a video in the
Creative Expression Forum.
I don't have her skill with words but I can appreciate her writing.
Carruthers
Carruthers, Wishing you support in this difficult time. The aging and death of parents is a difficult phase that we all go through.
My Great Uncle John died last night. Grandad's second sibling in the last two years, and the baby of the family. The five of them seemed to have charmed lives until Auntie Alice died - they were all in their eighties and all compos mentis.
Of course no-one lives forever, but the Doyles were giving the impression of immunity for a while.
We didn't really know John - not like Auntie Alice, who was very much close family - but I feel it for Grandad.
Sorry to hear about your Great Uncle, Sundae.
Like yourself, I always thought that as my older relatives had always been there, then they always would be. It is probably a defence mechanism.
Carruthers
Carruthers, Wishing you support in this difficult time. The aging and death of parents is a difficult phase that we all go through.
Thanks for your kind words, Merc. I'm grateful to you for that.
Carruthers
Yet more bad news. One of my best buddies has diabetes. He's had two operations to replace various organs and had to give up a toe. The latest bad news? They found out yesterday that his daughter (my goddaughter) has childhood onset diabetes.
Fuck diabetes. (to paraphrase)
I'm sorry Pete.
That was my concern, diabetes. It runs in my mom's side of the family. Doc didn't seem to think that was the concern, after doing some neurological tests that resembled a DUI test, that I must've failed...hence the CT scan (and the fact that after my car accident they did x-rays of my head but not a scan and he says the scan will show the blood vessels and other things that could be a problem.)
Hang in there everyone. Warm thoughts...
Oh Pete, that's really hard. How old is she?
Carruthers, please enjoy him while you have him.
Shaw -- good luck with the test! Don't study too hard. :p
Aw, Shaw. When you're all done with the nasty scans and you find the little fucker that wrecked your car, I'll come and hold him while you kick him. Be sure to bruise his labia. Or should that be bruce his labia?
Thanks.
Bad luck follows me around.
If I have brain damage, I'll find the little fucker and sue his pants off. ;)
He'll be lookin' like a fool with his pants on the ground.
Bwaaahahaaaa!
And his cell phone stuck up his butt.
I hope the planets align soon all this bad luck is crazy!
Shaw I hope he won't be calling anyone! I hate getting calls from assholes! :eyebrow:
Speaking of assholes anyone else getting those 000 000 0000 calls? They are untraceable and probably from credit scammers? :mad:
lol...calls from assholes! Butt-dialing (have you seen that commercial? "Cracks" me up!)
:)
Never got a 0000 call.
friggin' pollen.
Ditto.
I just got in from outside, and the air was actually a little green when the wind was blowing.
I had to hose off the trampoline before the kids could use it, because it was coated in yellow.
@ Carruthers: It's slightly shocking when you suddenly notice the aging process in your parent. Like they continue looking a particular way and then suddenly you notice, they've changed quite a lot whilst your head was turned. Bizarre really. Slightly unreal seeming. I hope this isn't the beginnng of anything. It may just be one of those things.
@ Sundae: sorry to hear about that m'dear. Hope your Gramps is ok.
Oh, and Fuck diabetes. It's a sucky, nasty condition.
Oh Pete, that's really hard. How old is she?
She's eleven. She's a tough kid and I'm proud of how well she's taking this, but I sure wish it had passed her by.
If wishes were fishes we'd all cast nets.
Hugs to all.
I'd like to state for the record that I usually do not visit this thread nowadays, because I've found reading everyone's troubles upsets me too much. I find it ironic to see my name as the OP all the time.
Shaw - that's what this thread is for, dear girl!
Well, I don't often post in here, but lately, the fit has been hitting the shan.
My gramma died last Friday and had the funeral the following Monday. It was a beautiful service. I still miss her. She had suffered years of Alzheimer's disease, so she was ready, but I am still sad.
My husband was laid off this previous Friday. He's relieved, but I am terrified.
A close friend of the family is in stage 4 of lung cancer. It looks like he might not make it, but we are all hoping and praying for the best.
So, that is the sum of upsetting news for our family. Please keep us in your thoughts/good vibes/prayers.
Thanks,
Case
Oh Case! I'm thinking of you and your family - good vibes coming your way!
stuff
idiots
and assholes
( I'm over-booked and more than tired )
@ case. Take care and I am sending all my best wishes and empathy.
@ Case: sorry to hear of you troubles. Sending positive vibes and a virtual hug your way *hug*
@ case: awww hon...sending warm thoughts your way.
@ limey: heheheee...just one of my friends with a drinking problem who cut her eye wide open falling down the steps. When I got home I just wanted to tell SOMEONE about my experience with her at the ER, then it just seemed silly. :blush:
So sorry to hear all that case :-(
Thoughts/good vibes/prayers. ... all on their way.
Hope things start looking up soon, case.
Thanks you, Clod. Actually, things are already looking up. We are building our house cleaning business, and believe it or not, loving it. It is so nice to have someone to help me, now!
Thanks you, Clod. Actually, things are already looking up. We are building our house cleaning business, and believe it or not, loving it. It is so nice to have someone to help me, now!
You guys should bank mad loot. I knew a couple who did that. They would do their first cleaning on an hourly basis, then offer the homeowner a lower,flat rate for the same service. They figured out a system where they knew if a job took them five hours the first time, they could get the time down to half after a few times. The owners were happy to get a discount, and my friends made more money per hour than their hourly rate and were able to get a few houses done per day.
@case, glad the layoff turned out to be blessing in disguise! I had that happen when I go fired from my last job and ended up with a job paying almost 2xs what I had before.
My sister is still sick. This makes 21 days of solid sickness. A week before she got sick with whatever she has now, she got a stomach thing for 3 days while on her honeymoon. She's a teacher and hasn't been able to teach her students for almost 3 full weeks (she's tried to go in a few days). She is seeing an infectious disease specialist on Friday. My mom wants me to go as well seeing as I haven't been feeling great for some weeks now also.
I really really hate not being able to help those I love.
I hope she gets some answers and some help, that's rough.
I hope she gets some answers and some help, that's rough.
Thanks jinx, the new doc she is going to see is recommended by my mom's most-trusted-has-never-failed endocrine specialist. He has recommended great docs and surgeons for my mom is the past, so this recommendation should work out.
Thanks, moar. I hope your sister is able to solve the illness. Sounds awful!
Everything.
The best thing would be an apocolypse. More personally, a truck should just drive over me. It's be a hella lot easier than this shit.
C'mon, have pity on the poor truck driver. He'd probably lose his job and his license, be unable to work, or even drive to unemployment. He couldn't pay the mortgage, and become homeless, and the bank would fail causing the town to collapse. Social services would scatter his children all over the state in mean foster homes, his wife would run off with a social worker, and his puppy and kitten would starve to death. You wouldn't want to be responsible for that would you? :o
Maybe it's time to stop worrying about anyone else but me. Good karma gets you nowhere. Perhaps the cheaters of the earth have a point.
But but but, we love you. :grouphug:
There's no such thing as good karma or bad karma. It's all karma.
I don't know what's upsetting me. or to put it more accurately everything is upsetting me. Y'know when you just find yourself crying for no reason? or for some stupid little thing that would never normally get to you? I'm flying off the handle at nothing. Swinging from elation to just...I dunno...feels like grief but there's nothing to grieve over. I didn't sleep at all last night. Wasn't down. Was too upbeat. Like my mind was going ten to the dozen and wouldn;t slow down. Just racing. Then bam! I'm angry or something. I dunno.
This isn;t like me. I;m sat here with fucking tears streaming down my face and I have no idea why. But I can't stop. I should be feeling happy. Things are going brilliantly. I almost poste din the Happy thread like half an hour ago, only didn;t because ,my AVG scan was running and I didn;t want to lo in.
I hope you feel better soon.
:comfort:
So do i. Thanks.
I think Pil's a bit worried. he keeps coming over to me to see what's up.
Awwww...ya know, I had a crappy day and I couldn't wait to get home, put on pajamas, and hang out with the cats. :)
Who's a good boy? Pilau is! Yes him is!
Did he get a load of Darla yet?
Heh. Darla reminds me of Pilau.
Y'know I am not sure which is worst; the crying, or the flying high.
he is a good boy. He's my little wolf.
I'd say "welcome to my world" but it sounds dismissive. ;)
Well, I guess I already said it. BUT, I was thinking...this isn't normal for you. You're very even keel.
Are there any anniversaries of any milestones or something? You know, something maybe you aren't thinking of outright but it's on your mind?
*shakes head* I don;t think so. That's what's worrying me.
I have been in states like this before, but not for a long time. It's bouncing between euphoria and tears that's getting to me. The 'up' isn' a comfortable up, it's more like a chemical high. Y'know, like when your jaw is clenched and your kind of a bit hyper? Then shoom! down so fast your stomach turns.
K. Talking about it is calming me down. I've stopped crying *smiles* hopefully I'll actually sleep tonight, though for the life of me I cannot currenty imagine feeling tired.
Thanks Shaw.
have you been to a doc and had bloodwork done? B12 deficiency? Bipolar? ALS? Menopause?
This is more of a "what is making you anxious" thing, but I don't feel like starting another of these type threads.
My sis is suppose to get the blood test results back tomorrow from her latest doc, the infectious disease doc. Hopefully they have finally been able to find what is causing her sickness.
One of the parent's of her students emailed her today asking if she could tutor their kid after school. WTF?
1) The kid can go to tutoring in the morning, the parent's just complain its a hassle.
2) She possibly has an contagious disease, and one that is breaking her down, but yet you want to expose your child to that?
3) If she was well enough to work, she would be working!
Also, I'm anxious for myself. I went to a new doc on Friday also cuz I had a fever and some sinus issues. He gave me meds for that, but also found that my thyroid feels enlarged. Might be the cause of my chronic fatigue, which I have been struggling with for....2yrs now, I think. So had blood tests and a sonogram of my thyroid. I hope they DO find something wrong, so that finally there will be something to fix, and I don't have to feel like its all my fault. Results for that "in a few days."
*shakes head* I don;t think so. That's what's worrying me.
I have been in states like this before, but not for a long time. It's bouncing between euphoria and tears that's getting to me. The 'up' isn' a comfortable up, it's more like a chemical high. Y'know, like when your jaw is clenched and your kind of a bit hyper? Then shoom! down so fast your stomach turns.
K. Talking about it is calming me down. I've stopped crying *smiles* hopefully I'll actually sleep tonight, though for the life of me I cannot currenty imagine feeling tired.
Thanks Shaw.
Dana and Shaw: its a hard struggle. I hope y'all both get to the root of your problems soon. :grouphug:
You both just need a man.
Someone to blame, then you wouldn't have to figure out what's up.:lol:
I think I'll just blame the government :P
Am feeling tons better this morning. Getting some sleep helped. A lot. Alot of help that is, not a lot of sleep :P But hey: 5 solid hours isn't half bad for me ;) Hopefully that's it, done and dusted. Usually by the time I start talking about what's up that means I've hit bottom and about to come around.
Also, I'm anxious for myself. I went to a new doc on Friday also cuz I had a fever and some sinus issues. He gave me meds for that, but also found that my thyroid feels enlarged. Might be the cause of my chronic fatigue, which I have been struggling with for....2yrs now, I think. So had blood tests and a sonogram of my thyroid. I hope they DO find something wrong, so that finally there will be something to fix, and I don't have to feel like its all my fault. Results for that "in a few days."
Awww, dear, I know. I'm still worried about my noggin and still haven't heard from the hospital as to when they're scheduling my scan. I won't even go into what I did yesterday...but it was proof of just how bad my concentration is. I can't seem to focus. I forget what I did 5 minutes ago.
I know what you mean when you say you hope they find something, so at least there is something to fix.
Hang in there, girl.
You both just need a man.
Someone to blame, then you wouldn't have to figure out what's up.:lol:
:lol:
NO comment. ;)
I think I'll just blame the government :P
Am feeling tons better this morning. Getting some sleep helped. A lot. Alot of help that is, not a lot of sleep :P But hey: 5 solid hours isn't half bad for me ;) Hopefully that's it, done and dusted. Usually by the time I start talking about what's up that means I've hit bottom and about to come around.
I got a lot of sleep last night, and feel better too.
I'm glad you're feeling better. :)
Awww, dear, I know. I'm still worried about my noggin and still haven't heard from the hospital as to when they're scheduling my scan. I won't even go into what I did yesterday...but it was proof of just how bad my concentration is. I can't seem to focus. I forget what I did 5 minutes ago.
I know what you mean when you say you hope they find something, so at least there is something to fix.
Hang in there, girl.
(heeeheee...that was a joke, you know, can't remember stuff...haahaa. Heeeheee...eh, I got nuttin')
(heeeheee...that was a joke, you know, can't remember stuff...haahaa. Heeeheee...eh, I got nuttin')
*snort*
Shawnee: You got me scrolling up and down and a tad confused. :p: Glad to see you still got your sense of humour although you're worried about your health. :) I was about to pm you and ask about your doctor's appointment. Don't you just wish they can work faster to figure what's wrong with us? You're still waiting on making an appointment? What is wrong with them? Geez.....
Heeheee...I was thinking, what if I do have a benign tumor or something, and they remove it? What part of my brain will I lose? Will I no longer have a sense of humor? Then I wouldn't be "me." What if I can't remember how to do my job? What if I become, like, a really nice person? :eek:
Arggggggghhhhh!
;) Just things that have been running through my head.
I called my doc on Monday to ask what I should do. She said the nurse would call me soon.
Sigh...it's not like I'm breaking their door down to get the test...of course I don't really WANT to, so I wish they'd get on the ball so I don't have to keep begging for a damn appointment that I don't want to have to do anyway. But, have to I must.
Thanks! :)
We have other people's cows here to feed and synchronize for breeding. One just chased me trying to get me. I had to run about 200 yards to dive head first and roll over the electric fence! I called up the owners and told them to come get their cow otherwise she and McDonald's will be on a first name basis!!!!! :mad2:We don't keep people chasin' cows they are crazy. :mad: :scream:
You have some seriously unique experiences! I giggled, though I know a cow could actually hurt you, at the thought of your narrow escape and the crazy people-chasin' cow. :)
Seriously they better be hooking up their trailer pronto to come and get her because F that shit!:eyebrow:
You can walk thru our herd and pet calves if they come up to you. Some gals are a bit nervous right after they calve but you give them a wide berth for a couple of days and they are fine. This one ran across the pasture just to get me. No insane cows wanted BYE BYE! :)
Sale on Angus burgers at Nirvana's . . . while supplies last ;)
I like my steaks rare. :yum:
Mom just called. Doc had no definitive answers for my sister still. The most recent round of blood tests ruled out all of the "nastier" possibilities (IE lupus). Not all of the tests have come back though, still waiting on the mono test for example, which she has had mono, but it is possible to have it reoccur. He has pretty much concluded its a viral infection, and she's not contagious. She can go to work if she feels up to it...
Doing another round of blood tests and a stomach scan. Another appointment next Wed.
"It's never lupus."
Sorry to hear about the uncertainty, moar.
Hope all works out for your sister.
I didn't know there were blood tests specifically for lupus. That took me by surprise.
"It's never lupus."
I'm sorry to disagree with whomever you are quoting, but sometimes it is lupus. Mrs. Z lost a very dear high-school friend to lupus.
It's from
House, Pete. Since many of the strange diseases that present to the group could be explained by lupus, the writers have made "it's not lupus" into a rule on the show, and hence a running gag.
I certainly wasn't downplaying the impact of this disease on your wife's friend, or
the estimated 161,000 to 322,000 adults in the U.S. afflicted with it.
One last thing: while many people expected that “the condition” that changes in every episode would never be lupus, an episode in the current season ended up with a patient actually HAVING lupus, prompting Gregory House to say “I finally have a case of lupus.” So while some of you may have started to think that in real life, “it's never lupus”, remember that even in the show that coined the phrase, lupus happens.
I left work early, now I'm waiting to vomit.:greenface
Heeheee...I was thinking, what if I do have a benign tumor or something, and they remove it? What part of my brain will I lose? Will I no longer have a sense of humor? Then I wouldn't be "me." What if I can't remember how to do my job? What if I become, like, a really nice person? :eek:
Arggggggghhhhh!
;) Just things that have been running through my head.
I called my doc on Monday to ask what I should do. She said the nurse would call me soon.
Sigh...it's not like I'm breaking their door down to get the test...of course I don't really WANT to, so I wish they'd get on the ball so I don't have to keep begging for a damn appointment that I don't want to have to do anyway. But, have to I must.
Thanks! :)
I don't think it's a tumor. I have high hope it is not. Could be hormones?
I have had those symptoms.
Three years ago I found out my thyroid level is a little low which made me tired and still does....oh and chunky too. It also took the fight right out of me. Kinda like a free lobotomy.
If I stop taking my thyroid hormone I become so distracted and tired.
I should note that some doctors will not give the thyroid hormone if you are in the very low or borderline low area. When my regular doctor was on vacation he tried to give me anti-depressants. Well I wasn't depressed. I think you have to have emotions to be depressed so I through the script in the trash. When my regular female doctor came back and I told her my symptoms she said my thyroid was low but within range but because of my symptoms gave me thyroid hormone. Not everyone is equal. Some people are greatly effected by the slight deviation from the blood tests baseline. It took along time ( maybe a year ) to find the right dose but I started to get my energy back and my concentration for the most part. The chunk is still with me though only not so bad. I just get puffy at times.
I left work early, now I'm waiting to vomit.:greenface
Oh I had that! I hope you feel better real soon! ugg
Nausea is almost worse than pain. I feel for ya.
sky, could be a lot of things. I'll know something Wednesday, scheduled my scan.
It's probably something much simpler. It'll be nice to know there's nothing in there that shouldn't be (besides some random thoughts.) ;)
Unless they admit me, I'll be good to go.
Thanks! :)
I left work early, now I'm waiting to vomit.:greenface
Whenever I feel like that I think about a greasy pork sandwich.
I left work early, now I'm waiting to vomit.:greenface
Sorry man. That swept through the glatthouse last week. Somehow I was the only one spared. It's being spread at the elementary school. It's a bad one. Very infectious. Lots of kids getting it.
The worst part was just as one glatt family member got better, another would get sick. It made the thing last all week.
My mom had thyroid issues a about 10yrs ago, the had to remove it. Then they found out it was cancer. She's been on synthroid. If my issue is cancer, that doesn't really bother me. Thyroid issues just run in the family.
Shaw, I hope they get you straightened out soon!
Griff, I remember having to sip on cola syrup over ice as a kid when I was feeling nauseous...it seemed to help then. I haven't been sick like that in a loooong time, so not sure if it truly works or if it was a jedi-mom trick.
I never did hurl... I should have focused on that greasy sandwich...
We used to get that syrup as kids too.
The minor cough, which I assumed was a minor cough and worked all weekend through, carrying heavy stuff and gigging for hours and staying up all hours of the night, is now a chest cold with a 100.5 fever and sinus congestion.
And me with no cola syrup. Back to bed.
Lots of B vitamins! and chicken soup. Get better soon.
I have psoriasis on my face! Very unhappy. :(
Uggggg. I hope it is only a small patch.
So far. I don't usually get it on my face though, so we'll see what happens.
I think I need a holiday. lol
Bring your hubby and come see me! :lol:
We'd never get out of airport security! lol (it would be fun to do one day though)
I have psoriasis on my face! Very unhappy. :(
Have you tried putting a pancake on it?
You're on a 'roll' now Merc.
Hi Ali, I haven't seen you around for a while.
G'day HLJ. I don't post a whole lot these days, but I still lurk about most days off and on, so I know what you're all doing. ;)
That sucks Ali; hope it clears up soon.
Stupid fucking English Defence League (racist anti-Muslim protest group).
I mentioned before that they were staging a march in my home town on my Dad's 70th birthday. I was unhappy enough about the march, let alone the coincidence that made it a day of celebration for us.
But news filters through bit by bit; I learn that all the town centre churches will be closed and boarded up. Most of the town centre shops will be closed. The buses are stopping approx 1/2 a mile outside the town centre. Oh and the taxi drivers (mostly Asian, but usually second generation) are not providing a service either.
I've just snagged a couple of taxis but we're paying a premium.
Bloody racist bigots.
Not only getting my peaceful relatively trouble free town on the national news for all the wrong reasons, but now making problems for my Dad's birthday.
Grrrrrrrrr.
Is everything closing because the English Defence League is having its march or because they are concerned about a reprisal?
A bit of both I think.
The fact that the EDL are coming IN to Aylesbury brings worries that anti-protestors will also come IN.
The bottom line is that Aylesbury is simply a staging ground, not the source of the march.
So it really isn't the people marching, its the people AGAINST the people that are marching. Gotcha.
Sucks that it has to happen on his B-day.
No. it is both the people marching and the people against the people that are marching.
Since the majority of both are likely to have come into the town from elsewhere.
If I understand Sundae correctly.
The point is, that there is a decent chance that such a march will descend into violence one way or another.
Shit timing though :(
What the hell, free entertainment. Round up the family, pack a picnic basket, grab your gas masks, and have a merry old time. Maybe you could sell your empty wine bottles to the rioters. :haha:
Dana's got it.
There will also be a high police presence and although this is designed to prevent trouble, will further antagonise those who want to feel suppressed on either side.
And not to forget there is still a hooligan element in this society - football used to be their excuse; race and religion are simply a different way to have a ruck on a Bank Holiday weekend.
It's going to be a highly charged atmosphere regardless.
Luckily, Bruce, we're going to dinner on the other side of town.
And my Dad's "secret" guests are staying on the same side.
My poor old sister (and I don't say that very often) has to make a big detour to get to us though. So even if I were tempted to go watch I can't be in two places at once.
I think Bruce has it. Nice high rooftop, or an upper floor bay window, some champagne, and maybe a few rocks or firecrackers to toss onto the crowd below to get them livened up. :corn:
What if the held their march and no one came. How disappointed would they be?
Or do as Bruce and Zen said - that would be entertaining too.
And flash, don't forget to flash for the media. :haha:
What if the held their march and no one came. How disappointed would they be?
That would be my ideal solution.
They come into town on a shopping Saturday and all the parents are there with double pushchairs blocking the pavements and all the old grannies are having chats right outside shops and the only reaction they get is tuts and rolled eyes and a few exasperated, "Excuse me please!" as people push past them.
I'm keeping my fingers crossed that there will be more journos there than supporters/ anti-protestors and it will all pass off in a damp squib way.
My car tops my list today!
2 years ago I did a totally impulsive thing and bought a used Land Rover Discovery before I knew that they are about the most break down prone vehicle on the market and that the costs of parts and labor to repair them rival Mercedes and BMW.
So, after replacing the short block and doing a complete valve job for about $9000 the car ran fine until the brakes started acting up. Managed to fix that myself but then the transfer case sprang a leak and that ran me $1200 to overhaul. Now my engine is knocking like something is not good inside and the rebuilt engine only has about 24000 miles on it.
So it sits in my driveway because until the home I inherited from my parents after they died but never wanted has not sold and the bank account runs low each month which precludes me from having my car looked at. And I need to see a dentist. CRAP.
On the other hand, a friend just had brain surgery to remove a tumor and another friend's wife died unexpectedly.
So I guess, this too shall pass.
Ugghh - there is something going on with today and none of its good.
Hope you've hit bottom and things look up soon.
crap! is it? That would explain a lot.
I think it was 28th or 29th.
I hate money pit cars.
HA HA HA AH AHAHA HAAAAAA!
Holy crap - thanks Bruce.
I found out that I have
orbital cellulitis in my left eye this afternoon, which is apparently a very serious condition. My doctor has put me on some ass-kicking antibiotics in the hopes of staving off serious problems and surgery. If it does not improve by tomorrow, I have to go to the hospital.
I'm pretty scared, but optimistic that the antibiotics are gonna do their magic. If you could all throw in some karma points for me, I'd greatly appreciate it.
Thanks.
Yow that's pretty scary syc... please keep us updated, I'll be thinking of you.
That does sound scary man,.. thinking good thoughts.
Eek, scary syc! I hope the antibiotics work for you.
Got an update on my sis. Doctor is testing more, but he's starting to think she has adult-onset Still's Disease, a type of arthritis.
I bolded the parts that match for her condition:
It is rare in adults, a majority of whom are between 20 and 35 years of age at onset of symptoms. Of all patients with Still's Disease, 100% have high intermittent fever; 100% have joint inflammation and pain, muscle pain with fevers, and develop persistent chronic arthritis. Ninety-five percent (95%) have the faint salmon-colored skin rash. Eighty-five percent (85%) have swelling of the lymph glands or enlargement of the spleen and liver; and 85% have a marked increase in the white blood cell count. Sixty percent (60%) have inflammation of the lungs (pleuritis) or around the heart (pericarditis). Forty percent (40%) have severe anemia. And twenty percent (20%) have abdominal pain.
Of course it could be something else...
That sucks mtp. Fuck autoimmune diseases. Any idea how well the potential treatments work?
Syc, how's your eye doing? Hope you're not reading this from the hospital bed...
I hope he's reading it!
MTP- that sounds awful let us know how this plays out.
Howdy, peeps!
Unfortunately, I've been in the hospital since Sunday. You can get the basic events by clicking on my Twitter page. All thoughts, prayers, karma, etc. needed.
TIA.
So Sycamore, you didn't mention the cause.... Good vibes being packaged and shipped! :)
Good luck. That twitter's hard for me to deal with though. I'm too old for such shennanigans.
Hopin and prayin all goes well. Good Luck.
The wart? on my toe that hurts and is making it hard for me to walk.
Cicero, no clue. Could be due to a sinus infection, a scratch...*shrugs*
Jinx, have you tried Dr. Scholl's plantar wart bandaids? Even if it's not a wart, the little cushioned donut bandaid makes all the pain of walking on it go away.
I tried that first Clod, but the acid part was too big and ate away the surrounding toe area. So then I tried the freezing stuff, but had to trim down the q-tip things after I froze half my toe off. Tried that 4 or 5 times.... the wart? is bigger now and I have to keep my toes flexed off the ground when I walk...
I called a podiatrist today, made and apt for next week. Wonder if I can get him to look in my ear...
Despite not drinking, not eating snacks or sweets, avoiding refined foods like bread and pasta, eating reasonable portions, and walking 4-6 miles 3-5 times a week I have gained about 7 pounds and am at an all time weight high of 225lbs.
I feel like shit lately, get winded walking across the room or up a few stairs, and none of my clothes fit.
WTF is going on?
Did you build up a bunch of muscle mass walking?
what jinx said both times, except that shortness of breath walking across the room after all that walking is bad. See a doctor.
Yeah, I'm calling the doc in the am.
No real muscle mass, my clothes fit better when I have muscle. I feel bloaty and generally shitty.
Old over night? or within a week or two suddenly? Nah, It's doc time
Can't tell you its menopause :yelsick: I hope you find out and get it fixed SN
awesome an appt for 3:40 today!
great. nothing worse than waiting. good luck, it's about time a dwellar came home from the docs with something nameable and curable :lol:
Sadly, nothing nameable yet. He doesn't think it is Lyme which is good, but also bad. (it would have been nameable and curable)
His phlebotomist, Dr. Acula, drew a couple of vials of blood making a nice hash of my vein.
Doesn't seem like rheumatoid arthritis, might be osteoarthritis.
BP was insanely high, could be salt? Weight could be water? Thyroid?
So they got a whole lot of blood and they are going to run some tests...
Don't you think your blood pressure could be anxiety?
A friend told me it's very, very hard to get a positive from a Lyme blood test.
That's good -you might yet end up with something nameable and cureable. Hang in there.
What's upsetting me today is that I really can't share with all y'all what is absolutely and utterly occupying my mind and pissing me off because it's currently a police matter. But I'd love to have a good rant. Yes I have done so in private via email but there's something extra about getting it out there on a public board, ya know? Soon, my enemies, soon you will be trashed on the cellar. You might want to buy Taco Shields.
fucker appears to have taken the last of the homemade soup to work. I was looking forward to that. Now I had to have tinned stuff -admittedly probably lower in cals and cholesterol, but sodium through the roof according to the label. tasted like it too :(
::sticks lower lip out::
::lower lip wobbles a little::
fine. I'll just die then. See if I care.
What's upsetting me today is that I really can't share with all y'all what is absolutely and utterly occupying my mind and pissing me off because it's currently a police matter. Soon, my enemies, soon you will be trashed on the cellar. You might want to buy Taco Shields.
Only a little later ...
fucker appears to have taken the last of the homemade soup to work. ...
And this is a police matter?
darn tooting right it is. 'Cause Im'ma kill 'im
No time to be upset! I'll let my stomach carry that burden.
owwwie
Sadly, nothing nameable yet. He doesn't think it is Lyme which is good, but also bad. (it would have been nameable and curable)
His phlebotomist, Dr. Acula, drew a couple of vials of blood making a nice hash of my vein.
Doesn't seem like rheumatoid arthritis, might be osteoarthritis.
BP was insanely high, could be salt? Weight could be water? Thyroid?
So they got a whole lot of blood and they are going to run some tests...
He's ruled out heart disease?
I went through a time period a couple years ago where I just couldn't do shit. I was trying to ride but got totally winded, had dead legs etc... I still don't know what was going on but I eventually worked through it by rebuilding myself fencing. If you get your Docs clearance maybe you need to increase the intensity of what you're doing.
Hoping it's something simple S.N.
Although thyroid does that to me and it doesn't feel so simple at least it just requires a dose of hormone to bring it in to balance again.
I got my fingers crossed it is something simply manageable.:fingerx:
Got the bloodwork back from the lab. Everything is fine except my liver has elevated functions, whatever that means. They want to test again in six weeks.
What ever I still feel like shit.
I cried a few times today.
We went to her church for presentations for Graduating Seniors.
I was sad for the first time.
He's ruled out heart disease?
I went through a time period a couple years ago where I just couldn't do shit. I was trying to ride but got totally winded, had dead legs etc... I still don't know what was going on but I eventually worked through it by rebuilding myself fencing. If you get your Docs clearance maybe you need to increase the intensity of what you're doing.
Yeah, I have an excellent heart, lowest index for CHD. After speaking to my sisters, both of whom have sleep apnea, I now wonder if it is sleep apnea. Mrs. Nutkin says I always stop breathing when I sleep, so I will look into that.
Yeah, I have an excellent heart, lowest index for CHD. After speaking to my sisters, both of whom have sleep apnea, I now wonder if it is sleep apnea. Mrs. Nutkin says I always stop breathing when I sleep, so I will look into that.
Maybe that's due to her pillow...
I have a friend who had his tonsils out in his mid-thirties for sleep apnea. Said it completely changed his life. He never knew what it felt like to actually be fully-rested before then.
Yeah, I have an excellent heart, lowest index for CHD. After speaking to my sisters, both of whom have sleep apnea, I now wonder if it is sleep apnea. Mrs. Nutkin says I always stop breathing when I sleep, so I will look into that.
I have an uncle with sleep apnea, sounds like a possibility.
I have a friend who had his tonsils out in his mid-thirties for sleep apnea. Said it completely changed his life. He never knew what it felt like to actually be fully-rested before then.
My brother has sleep apnea, and when he got his mask, it changed his life. He said basically the same thing.
I have sleep apenia and I have a CPAP and it changed my life.
Maybe that's due to her pillow...
Hmmm, that would explain the chewed up pillow cases.
Well, I see the doc again on Thursday so I'll tell him.
It's amazing how many people say the exact same thing about cpap machines, both of my sisters said "It changed their lives"
It's not often you hear that consistency of testimonial, usually it is a claim for a bogus product. Anyway, it would explain a lot of things. I made the mistake of reading up on sleep apnea right before bed. Mistake is putting it mildly.
Well here, I'll give you an alternate opinion: my mother tried the mask and said it was way, way too uncomfortable to sleep in. She hated it, and gave up after two nights. So now it doesn't have a perfect track record of satisfied patients. :)
Yeah? Well, my brother refers to it as his Darth Vader mask. So no only has it changed his life, but he gets to pretend he's an evil Jedi knight when he goes to bed.
technically clod, since she is not using the mask, she is not a contender for (using) the mask changed my life. She does get a door prize for playing:
"I tried the mask and it was hella uncomfortable. I couldn't sleep with it or with out it."
Glatt, Does the mask come in black with the cape too? My son would dig it, especially if we changed his name to Luke.[COLOR="LemonChiffon"]
(Luke, I am your father)[/COLOR]
How much on fire did it catch? a little singe or run like hell before it blows?
Somehow this thread feels like TOP This Misery, today. Probably my fault.
My dear sweet little Portia died this morning of respiratory failure. For eight years this two lb titan slept next to my head at nite and was my constant arm candy. She had the heart of a pitbull. There is a hole in my soul ...:(
I am so heart broken :sniff:
So sorry Nirv. She looks like an angel there.
Sorry to Hear that Vana m
awweeee. I'm so sorry. :(
Thats awful nirvana, so sorry for your loss.
I'm so sorry, nirvana. What a sweetie.
How much on fire did it catch? a little singe or run like hell before it blows?
A singe a lot brush was in my engine the FD put it out. I do not think there is any damage to the vertical.
Sorry about Portia Nirvana.
Thank you all for sharing my misery ...:thepain: :sniff:
A singe a lot brush was in my engine the FD put it out. I do not think there is any damage to the vertical.
...
But what about your car?
I smashed 5 Thai chili peppers into the soybean curd paste mixture and ate it with rice. Ugh....it's really literally upsetting my stomach now. :thepain: I'm gonna go to bed to sleep it off. :neutral:
I smashed 5 Thai chili peppers into the soybean curd paste mixture and ate it with rice. Ugh....it's really literally upsetting my stomach now. :thepain: I'm gonna go to bed to sleep it off. :neutral:
:eek:
[YOUTUBE]0lhf9U5Wf3Q&start=33[/YOUTUBE]
Nirvana - so sorry about Portia. It is so hard to lose a canine friend :comfort: .
I smashed 5 Thai chili peppers into the soybean curd paste mixture and ate it with rice.
sorry, but I have to ask .....why would you do that?
sorry, but I have to ask .....why would you do that?
Endorphins
Endorphins
No. They're enshalks.
Well, since dolphins became dorphins I thought sharks should become shalks.
Netflix put The Abominable Dr. Phibes on UNAVAILABLE status only one week after I put in my queue.
sorry, but I have to ask .....why would you do that?
I like my food to be really, really spicy...well, compared to an average palette. How do I test to see if a chili pepper is spicy enough? I take a bite out of it. Those five Thai chili peppers added a good level of hotness to the mixture; however, my stomach is what it used to be. :sniff: I like to blame it on age. :p:
The Power of the Dog
There is sorrow enough in the natural way
From men and women to fill our day;
And when we are certain of sorrow in store,
Why do we always arrange for more?
Brothers and sisters, I bid you beware
Of giving your heart to a dog to tear.
Buy a pup and your money will buy
Love unflinching that cannot lie--
Perfect passion and worship fed
By a kick in the ribs or a pat on the head.
Nevertheless it is hardly fair
To risk your heart to a dog to tear.
When the fourteen years which Nature permits
Are closing in asthma, or tumour, or fits,
And the vet's unspoken prescription runs
To lethal chambers or loaded guns,
Then you will find--it's your own affair--
But ... you've given your heart to a dog to tear.
When the body that lived at your single will,
With its whimper of welcome, is stilled (how still!)
When the spirit that answered your every mood
Is gone--wherever it goes--for good,
You will discover how much you care,
And will give your heart to a dog to tear.
We've sorrow enough in the natural way,
When it comes to burying Christian clay.
Our loves are not given, but only lent,
At compound interest of cent per cent.
Though it is not always the case, I believe,
That the longer we've kept 'em, the more do we grieve:
For, when debts are payable, right or wrong,
A short-term loan is as bad as a long--
So why in--Heaven (before we are there)
Should we give our hearts to a dog to tear?
Rudyard Kipling
Sorry to hear about your dog, vana. :(
I took J to the airport (EWR) today; she's going on an Alaskan cruise with her family, to celebrate her mom. They paid for her ticket, so she only had to get airfare across the country. It's great for her, but I am alone here for the first time in years, which is going to be weird and a little sad for the week.
Not exactly alone, her kids will be here intermittently, which will also be weird without mom in place.
Plus you have your turtle!
PARTY at UT's Woo Hoo! ! ! ! ! !
oh, sorry wrong thread.
Well you always have us for company.
Several things!
My girlfriend going to visit her dog, and family, in Canada, for a while... leaving me all alone in England! It's a horrible thing, leaving her at the airport, alone, then coming home to an empty house. (Since moving in together, this is the first time we've been apart. It's a very strange, sad feeling.)
The ever-growing realisation that mainstream music no longer requires any talent... not like it did, two decades ago.
Voices are more synthetic, than real, these days. "Glee" is the most recent proof of this.
And, of course, the growing state of the world in general... which I went into a little rant about, in a different thread.
It's sad at night, but during the day I have the sounds of son and granddaughter screaming at the top of their lungs to keep me occupied.
Sounds...great? I am sure time will pass quite quickly under those circumstances. Mebbe? I am not really a "silver lining" person.
I give..... :)
It's sad at night, but during the day I have the sounds of son and granddaughter screaming at the top of their lungs to keep me occupied.
At least you don't have a pinched bottom from using your "personal furniture" - that's not nothing, you know.
:bogroll:
I am dealing with my client who is very intelligent and well educated but too stupid even to use a mac. Anything beyond "I just drag it onto the blue thing and it goes up" is too much to ask for.
What FTP client are you using? "I just drag it onto the blue thing and it goes up"
25 minutes to try and figure out why a doc that was uploaded was zipped as a .bin file that I cannot open up despite unzipping it with stuffit 2010 and power iso.
I'm sure there is a default setting at the bottom of this that compresses uploaded files bigger than such and such.
"Where would I find appleshare?"
Probably somewhere on your computer. Maybe use that nifty search feature you've got there.
What's a footfootfoot? and where has it been hiding?
At least you don't have a pinched bottom from using your "personal furniture" - that's not nothing, you know.
:bogroll:
Personal furniture - that reminds me of Soylent Green.
Hatcher: And what about the furniture?
Det. Thorn: [
motions to chest] Like grapefruit.
Hatcher: [
chuckles] You never saw a grapefruit.
Det. Thorn: You never saw her.
Interesting . . .someone must be over their athlete's footfootfoot or they figured out their password! ;)
Be careful, it could be some kind of archarcharch villain come to steal our solesolesoles.
My sister is still sick, and its still upsetting. Went to her house to take her dinner, she couldn't open the door, she's in so much pain. There is good news (kinda). The arthritis specialist believes it is Rheumatoid Arthritis although she was negative for the Rheumatoid Factor, possibly (most likely) she has Adult Onset Still's Disease. She also has characteristics of spondyloarthritis. She is on meds now, I don't remember what all, most of it won't really be effective for a few more weeks, but they put her on a high dosage of Prednisone(steroid) which seems to be helping already. Some of the meds she is on will cause birth defects if she gets pregnant, we're not clear on whether or not she'll be able to have children, she had been planning on it. My mom has been crying a lot, praying (yeah like that's effective), trying to fit this into some "God has a purpose" and trying to come up with some miracle cure. She has also been really clingy to me. Which is slightly annoying, but I'm being tolerant. Of course I've been crying, but mostly to myself, the diagnosis could have been a lot worse. Mostly I've been trying to help my sis and parents best I can even though I've had to work a good amount of overtime.
My sis is only 24.
I have to get this part out of my system. So if offends you, ignore it.
I've been very well behaved and haven't gone off on mom for all the stupid blind faith that this has to be part of some divine plan. Fuck god's divine plan, you don't get to condemn my sister to a life of pain for your fucking plan, selfish motherfucking bastard. Free will? How is fucking rheumatoid arthritis part of free will? It takes away a ton of her life options, that's not fucking free will. Oh and how about “I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. (Jeremiah 29:11)”
Fucking lies and complete nonsense. My sister has been faithful (and still is despite this) and this is the way her god treats her? With a fucking chronic disease when she's always lived a healthy lifestyle. If this god exists, he's a fucking jackoff bastard, and I'll be glad to go to hell to get away from him and his fucking hypocritical fucking shitface plans.
Well said? Because she is lashing out at god for her mother's beliefs?
I don't consider one persons screwed up religiosity the basis for what I believe or do not believe. Seems like much misplaced hostility. Why all the anger toward an entity one doesn't even believe in.
Life is full of disease. It hurts. It sucks. It makes no sense. It isn't a plan of a superior being. It is the way of all organic nature. That is all.
Well said? Because she is lashing out at god for her mother's beliefs?
I don't consider one persons screwed up religiosity the basis for what I believe or do not believe. Seems like much misplaced hostility. Why all the anger toward an entity one doesn't even believe in.
Life is full of disease. It hurts. It sucks. It makes no sense. It isn't a plan of a superior being. It is the way of all organic nature. That is all.
Lashing out at the idea of God, at the idea of blind faith, at the idea of religion... not God, Himself.
... Right, person whom I've never spoken to? (MoreThanPretty.)
Also, I'm terribly sorry that your sister, so young, has to go through so much... However, if she is able, or your mother is able, to find some comfort, in their faith... well, that, to me, is the only good to come from faith... At least they can find some form of shelter, of comfort, from what is a truly atrocious thing to happen to somebody so young.
I can see why to say "God has a reason" is better than to say "Well, nature's sure a bitch, why am I the unlucky one, why do I have to deal with this?" Don't you think? I mean, some happiness, regardless of where it's found, is better than sinking into a pit of pure depression and despair.
(I don't believe in any "God," and, to be honest, I find the entire idea of magic-men, zombie-messiahs, ghosts, and the like, to be a foolish escape for people too afraid to face the real world... but I can see the comfort your sister, and mother, must get from it... and I'd not try to take that away from them, in any manner.)
What if it's preventing them from seeking more rational strategies?
HLJ I wish....it were so.
If disease and ailments is some kind of spiritual warfare then I'm giving the devil a left hook right in the kisser. POW
That's what I tell my mom. FIGHT dammit FIGHT
What if it's preventing them from seeking more rational strategies?
If faith ever gets placed before/beyond medical reasoning/help... then...
Well, that's difficult. It's unfair to take away somebody's faith, but when it's stopping them from seeking the help they actually need... I suppose you've got to try and encourage them to seek that help, even if it means bending that faith, to allow such help to be sought.
(Perhaps encourage them, through/with their faith, to seek the help... unless their faith is directly against whatever help may be needed... in that case, as above, you'd have to try and bend their faith, to an acceptable degree, whereby they will readily seek that help, in the belief/acceptance that their God would want them to.)
Well said, MTP.
Thank you.
Well said? Because she is lashing out at god for her mother's beliefs?
I don't consider one persons screwed up religiosity the basis for what I believe or do not believe. Seems like much misplaced hostility. Why all the anger toward an entity one doesn't even believe in.
Life is full of disease. It hurts. It sucks. It makes no sense. It isn't a plan of a superior being. It is the way of all organic nature. That is all.
You need to read my post better, especially this part:
I have to get this part out of my system. So if offends you, ignore it.
Lashing out at the idea of God, at the idea of blind faith, at the idea of religion... not God, Himself.
... Right, person whom I've never spoken to? (MoreThanPretty.)
Right.
Also, I'm terribly sorry that your sister, so young, has to go through so much... However, if she is able, or your mother is able, to find some comfort, in their faith... well, that, to me, is the only good to come from faith... At least they can find some form of shelter, of comfort, from what is a truly atrocious thing to happen to somebody so young.
I can see why to say "God has a reason" is better than to say "Well, nature's sure a bitch, why am I the unlucky one, why do I have to deal with this?" Don't you think? I mean, some happiness, regardless of where it's found, is better than sinking into a pit of pure depression and despair.
I agree, that is why I have held my peace with my family and let them say whatever crazy shit they want to to make themselves feel better. It has been hard not to point out the stupidity of that belief, but if it does them some good...oh well. Let them be stupid.
(I don't believe in any "God," and, to be honest, I find the entire idea of magic-men, zombie-messiahs, ghosts, and the like, to be a foolish escape for people too afraid to face the real world... but I can see the comfort your sister, and mother, must get from it... and I'd not try to take that away from them, in any manner.)
I will rile against their beliefs most of the time (gays are sinners, abortion is a sin, out of wedlock sex is evil, ect ect) but this is one of those things I am keeping my mouth shut on because they need it badly and it doesn't hurt anyone (like the other beliefs do).
What if it's preventing them from seeking more rational strategies?
Fortunately, despite my sister's belief in god, she also has a rational mind and understands the benefits of science. She is following her doctor's instructions and medically proven treatments. My mom is bugging her even with all of her "if you eat [insert miracle food here] you'll get better!" If my sister were being irrational and relying on "faith" to heal her, I would definitely give her a reality check.
I am sorry about your sister MTP. Whatever she is doing to give herself hope is right for her, and its great that you understand. :)
What Nirvana said. Seems like you have a good handle on things.
My Coke glass is no longer cold, and no longer contains Coke.
... and my fridge is not within arm's reach. :(
My Coke glass is no longer cold, and no longer contains Coke.
... and my fridge is not within arm's reach. :(
You need a helper monkey!
You need a helper monkey!
I really do... think I could find one, on eBay?
MTP, I am very sorry to hear about your sister. Such violent autoimmune issues at such a young age -- well, it's pretty hideous. All I can say is that our knowledge in the field of immunology is growing incredibly fast right now; new treatment options and therapies are being invented left and right.
I agree, that is why I have held my peace with my family and let them say whatever crazy shit they want to to make themselves feel better. It has been hard not to point out the stupidity of that belief, but if it does them some good...oh well. Let them be stupid.
Yep, it's very hard not to point out other people's crazy shit. But evangelizing atheists are just as offensive as evangelizing christians. Good for you in recognizing the difference.
Fortunately, despite my sister's belief in god, she also has a rational mind and understands the benefits of science. She is following her doctor's instructions and medically proven treatments. My mom is bugging her even with all of her "if you eat [insert miracle food here] you'll get better!" If my sister were being irrational and relying on "faith" to heal her, I would definitely give her a reality check.
:thumb:
Sorry Shawnee, bad timing on that joke. Please re-post.
Nah, it's OK. I just needed an ear, then I realized maybe I don't need these ears, as reaching out is frowned upon if one is a jokester.
It's all good.
A friend drove a school bus, with a student on it, while extremely intoxicated. Her life, and the lives of her family, are fucked.
I read about that this am.
SWARTHMORE, Pa. - A school bus driver is facing drunk driving charges after police say she had a blood-alcohol level more than four times the legal limit while transporting a student.
xxxxxxx was admitted to a hospital after being pulled over Monday afternoon in the Philadelphia suburb of xxxx. She will be arraigned on DUI charges following her release.
Police Chief says a motorist noticed the bus driving erratically and alerted authorities. He says xxxxxx had an empty vodka bottle and more liquor on the bus. A teenage student was also on board.
A preliminary test showed xxxxxx had blood-alcohol level of 0.374. The legal limit for drivers in Pennsylvania is 0.08.
School District officials say xxxxxx was immediately fired.
Sorry for your friend - Glad no one was hurt or killed. She has time to get better and learn - some do not get that chance.
Whoa. That IS very intoxicated. I hope this person gets the help they need. :(
Nah, it's OK. I just needed an ear, then I realized maybe I don't need these ears, as reaching out is frowned upon if one is a jokester.
It's all good.
Now there's the martyr spirit we've all come to know and love.;)
Crap. I knew I'd get either martyr or passive-aggressive...I put money on the wrong one. I can't say anything to please looky-wooky-mooky. Maybe mail him some nooky, but we know how THAT works out! ;)
Thanks for playing. You can have what's behind door number 1, or you can let door number 2 hit you on your ass on the way out. ;)
I'm always glad to see consistency. Bravo on you! Ooo's a goo' boy?
:cheerldr:
The upside of missing your meds is it brings your creativity to the surface, right S123?
Not really, you just make it so easy. I can't believe you came back just to play with me! When you grow a few inches, you might really be a contender.
I will remind you of your post last night:
Nah, politicians are lame. People who are hired to do a job but only spend their energy keeping their job while ignoring the original task are lame. People that can't discuss an issue without constantly attacking other participants are lame.
Cloud, I hear you. It is genuinely bad news when someone needlessly dies. Contrary to popular beliefs I am human and recognize the tragedy here. In my opinion though, the real tragedy is that some people will completely miss the actual cause of this tragedy and focus on their own agendas.
I would contend that seeking someone out, on something that isn't even a topic you have an opinion on, who you have mutually ignored, just to be a snot-fuck to them, is lame too. ;)
But that's probably martyrdom or passive-aggressive, because it didn't come out of your mealy-mouth. Isn't that right, precious one?
:kisses:
what are you on about?
What issue are we discussing? You really think my comment was an "attack"? Whatever, I gave you some shit because I thought your response to HLJ was playing the martyr card pretty heavy and I thought it was funny.
I'll go back through my diary but I don't remember seeking you out and I certainly don't remember any mutual ignore contract... when did that start? I saw a post and I made a comment as I often do. You're welcome to respond in any way you want, but technically "mealy-mouth" refers to someone unwilling to give an opinion or take a stand. I'm not sure if that is descriptive of me so you might want to try something better.
You have no idea what my post was about, you have no idea what HLJ and I talked about, and you're playing innocent man like usual. My statement was a statement, you construe it however you want, but stop fucking with me.
Whatever, you bore me.
Go kick a ball or cheat on someone or something. Find something else you're good at besides kicking me when I'm down. There you go, another martyr statement for you to make fun of. Feel bigger, little man? Good, glad to help. I pity your sadness, really, that there's never any room for compassion for anyone. I may be a martyr, I may be all the things you think I am...but the truth is, good people get all my good, highly multiplied, right back. The rest, no time for...just more earth slime.
Thanks, I do feel better. You've brightened my day up about 3 notches. Thanks.
Oh, and you are right I don't know what you posted because you deleted it before nailing yourself to your cross...in response to a joke by HUNG LIKE JESUS. I've got no innocent act here. I saw something that struck me as funny. It still does. Have a nice day.
Woo hoooooooooo! I rock! :lol:
Have a blessed day!
[YOUTUBE]pdy_dArmMQs&feature[/YOUTUBE]
The entire Liar's Brigade has chimed in. Good job, fellas.
I read about that this am.
Sorry for your friend - Glad no one was hurt or killed. She has time to get better and learn - some do not get that chance.
Whoa. That IS very intoxicated. I hope this person gets the help they need. :(
She checked into in-patient rehab this morning.
Thanks, I do feel better. You've brightened my day up about 3 notches. Thanks.
Oh, and you are right I don't know what you posted because you deleted it before nailing yourself to your cross...in response to a joke by HUNG LIKE JESUS. I've got no innocent act here. I saw something that struck me as funny. It still does. Have a nice day.
:thumb:
Could you two please take a step back and look at yourselves?
Do you see Shawnee as subhuman or something? I wasn't here either, I didn't see the posts and I'm not known for my empathy, but it's clear even to me that this was a point where she needed a little sympathy and little TLC.
Clearly HLJ had bad timing with whatever joke he was making, realized it and rescinded it, by which time our heroine had repaired the chink in her armor with a little bravado. It's not martyrdom, you fuckwits. It's an emotional survival technique that some of us use. If you had a human bone in your body, you'd realize that now was the time to leave well alone if you had nothing supportive to say. But no. I pity your wives and daughters.
Yup, she went a little postal. I woulda too. And now she's gone. She was a stone in the cellar foundations. you guys are just roofing shingles. Or pvc siding. or something. Or maybe that wooden trim that attracts carpenter bees.
So this is upsetting me today
and pass me that martyr crown because I actually came here to post about what was upsetting me, but now I don't care whether you express sympathy, concern or ridicule. Go ahead, have at it. Invite the chode to join the party. Taunt away without fear of my scary response. No I'm not leaving the cellar (dream on) but I'm all done with this for a while.
bitch on, bros.
Sorry Shawnee, bad timing on that joke. Please re-post.
Nah, it's OK. I just needed an ear, then I realized maybe I don't need these ears, as reaching out is frowned upon if one is a jokester.
It's all good.
She checked into in-patient rehab this morning.
Hopefully because she realizes she needs help and not just because her lawyer told her to.
Yoo Hoo Monster! That was perfect. Thanks for posting it.
~snip~ It's not martyrdom, you fuckwits. It's an emotional survival technique that some of us use. If you had a human bone in your body, you'd realize that now was the time to leave well alone if you had nothing supportive to say. But no. I pity your wives and daughters.~snip~
Well, since I'm the one that made the comments I'll accept your reprimand. Do I see S123 as human? Absolutely. I see her as a human like we all are. I also see her give people shit all the time. I also see her play the martyr card about every hour on the hour. I thought the martyr move in response to a comment from a guy name Hung Like Jesus was fucking hilarious so I made a comment. No I don't regret it because I still think it was funny whether or not you or anyone else thought it was funny.
Welcome to the cellar.
a . . .
nevermind (unrelated post to above drama--will save for later)
I'm lost actually. There is a large missing subplot somewhere I just know it.
Not really. I called S123 for being a martyr once months ago. Today I thought it was funny and gave her shit for playing martyr again and it pissed her off. Apparently it pissed monster off as well.
A friend drove a school bus, with a student on it, while extremely intoxicated. Her life, and the lives of her family, are fucked.
I heard about that on the news, too.
.374 is not unusual for me to see at work, but way out of hand for a school bus driver, obviously, although I suspect this happens a lot more often than we know ... less often by drivers drinking on the job, but rather from them showing up still drunk from the night before. I hope she gets into treatment and sticks with it.
I fear there are more school bus drivers out there with the same problem. Too many of them drive like they own the fucking road. There was one recently that was using an unsafe bridge every day, that had been clearly posted for cars under 4,000 lbs, only.
Well, since I'm the one that made the comments I'll accept your reprimand. Do I see S123 as human? Absolutely. I see her as a human like we all are. I also see her give people shit all the time. I also see her play the martyr card about every hour on the hour. I thought the martyr move in response to a comment from a guy name Hung Like Jesus was fucking hilarious so I made a comment. No I don't regret it because I still think it was funny whether or not you or anyone else thought it was funny.
Welcome to the cellar.
The difference is, I don't give people shit about their personal issues.
Every hour on the hour. Do you listen to yourself?
I didn't say shit about your personal issues. I gave you shit for your response to HLJ. Yesterday. If memory serves I have only given you shit one other time which was months ago.
The difference is, I don't give people shit about their personal issues.
Every hour on the hour. Do you listen to yourself?
Are you saying you don't give people shit for their personal issues. [period?]
....or just that you don't do it every hour on the hour?
I'm fed up with being taken for granted and criticised when I'm not on top form. Hello world, I'm not paid for this shit you know..... a thank you would get you a lot further than a shitty email. you fucked up, don't shoot the goddamn messenger
oops, was I ranting again?
yes, and thank you for doing it. I want you to know that I appreciate what you do for us. Take yourself out to lunch today as a reward. And have dessert too.
Monster, I'm going to assume that your post is based on real life irritations, not the drama in this thread. If I'm wrong and it is the thread, then you have my sincere apologies for upsetting you.
Now back on topic. After being declared free and clear of my skin cancer for 4 whole months... I have 2 new spots. The upside is they are matching spots on each forearm so I'll have some cool new scars there.
hehe no it was the real life assholes. I just had hashbrowns and bacon to cheer myself up but I put too much oil in the pan so the hash brown were greasy. There's a cake in the oven because my friends are coming over for lunch (that was a very late breakfast) ....in one hour and my house is for shit.....
Hopefully because she realizes she needs help and not just because her lawyer told her to.
I don't think she has a lawyer, and it wouldn't surprise me if she throws herself on the court. She had a medical procedure a couple of years ago, which has since been linked to an increased risk of alcoholism. She has tried programs through her church, and AA, but those didn't work, and she's fought in-patient rehab (ironically because she thought she'd lose her job). She's inconsolable with herself.
I heard about that on the news, too.
.374 is not unusual for me to see at work, but way out of hand for a school bus driver, obviously, although I suspect this happens a lot more often than we know ... less often by drivers drinking on the job, but rather from them showing up still drunk from the night before. I hope she gets into treatment and sticks with it.
I hope so, too. Ever heard of Mira(something) rehab?
Now back on topic. After being declared free and clear of my skin cancer for 4 whole months... I have 2 new spots. The upside is they are matching spots on each forearm so I'll have some cool new scars there.
Martyr.
Martyr.
you're really very petty.
Scenario 1: Person A thrashes person B and person B defends themselves.
This is not person B acting a martyr.
Scenario 2: Person B later references scenario 1 in humorous manner.
This is not person B acting a martyr.
Just sayin'.
Person A? Person B? Thrashes?
Why is it so hard to actually SAY wtf you're talking about? Do you think you're being polite or something?
you're really very petty.
i actually thought it was funny. whether he meant it to be or not is irrelevent, imo.
maybe my perception is colored by our (spex and I) prior interactions, but I took that as him sticking up for Shawnee and being snarky. The whole 'taking sides' things.... meh.
Here, let me just liven up this thread with something new I'm upset about!
I'm just fucking despondent, y'all. My good friend's daughter has just started down the road to being autistic, but my friend doesn't understand or believe it yet.
Of course, this kid has had vicious allergy and immune issues from day one. After watching--watching, firsthand, we see them every week--what happened to my daughter, they decided to stop vaccinating theirs. Except then they started couching it in terms of only the MMR. And then only because the MMR is formulated with egg, and their daughter is already known to be severely allergic to egg. Now, this morning they come over to play, and she tells me that at her daughter's 18-month checkup they went ahead and gave her all the shots she was due (and overdue) for except the MMR. 4 shots total in one day.
Her daughter violently screamed, nonstop, for the rest of the day. The next morning, her legs hurt so badly she refused to walk on them, she just stood in one place and cried all day. After that the crying finally cleared up, but every single night since then (going on 2 weeks now) she has told her mother that her tummy hurts. No loss of speech yet... but last night she was strangely smacking herself in the face for no reason.
And yet, I'm sitting there on my couch verging on tears as she's telling me this, and she's just pleasantly detailing how she was really worried when at first her daughter wouldn't stop screaming, but now she feels like everything's all better. Oh, and she's excited because they've found an allergist who can compound the MMR shot without egg, so she can hopefully go ahead and get that one very soon. I encouraged her as strongly as I could to treat the tummy pain just in and of itself as tummy pain, and told her where to buy some very strong probiotics. But I don't think she's going to.
In six months, her daughter will officially receive a diagnosis. Mark my fucking words. Goddammit.
Uggghhh. So sorry to hear that Clod!
The worst part is, I know firsthand that part of her grieving process is going to be avoiding the shit out of me, because she'll know that I told her and she didn't listen. She'll come around eventually and accept things just like I did, but during that time she's not going to let me be there for her, it'll have to be someone else.
Person A? Person B? Thrashes?
Why is it so hard to actually SAY wtf you're talking about? Do you think you're being polite or something?
Unlike some, I don't follow every post of every thread on the cellar. So there's a good chance that I miss a lot of stuff. Plus I have a poor memory for some things so even if I've read something here, I might not remember it the next week.
So I wasn't sure the situation was as I viewed it and/or remembered it. On the other hand, I do have a feeling about this and I didn't want to leave it be. So I decided to post it generically.
Your post seems to be angry. I'm not sure what that's all about.
Because I think posting generically, alluding to situations and people without actually naming them so they can address your opinion in return is irritating. It's a back door way of getting some snark in.
That's just awful clod. I hope she lets you be there for her, if nothing else.
LJ - I took Spexx's comment as a snarky stickup for his pal as well. I just thought it was funny. Snarky can be funny sometimes.
Clod - Holy crap. I hope you are wrong for your friend's sake. I don't believe Lil Lookout's problems are tied to any vaccinations but we have chosen to be vaccination free with 2.0 anyway. People give us shit about it but in typical Lookout family tradition we tell them to bite the big one and keep their kids away from mine if they are worried.
Jinx - I know dar/pete's post is in reference to the drama I caused but in all honesty I can't really decipher the post so it doesn't really bother me or uplift me regardless of the intent. although the post did give me flashback nightmares to math class. If train A leaves the station at 12 going 60 mph and train B... I never liked those problems. So thanks for that Pete. I'm going to cry now.
Because I think posting generically, alluding to situations and people without actually naming them so they can address your opinion in return is irritating. It's a back door way of getting some snark in.
Ah. Well, not where I was going with that, but I can see your POV.
I really think that when person A feels that person B is picking on person C unjustly, then person D should buttfuck person E in the miouth until the plane takes off from the treadmill. Then Person C needs to jump the dolphin and land on person B on 9/11 while person A is passively aggressing person E. Of course person D must be the one to kill the hobo. And then it's all round to undertoad's for haggis and hot chocolate.
You insensitive bitch! my B was crushed by a dolphin riding the TT on 9/11!
I really think that when person A feels that person B is picking on person C unjustly, then person D should buttfuck person E in the miouth until the plane takes off from the treadmill. Then Person C needs to jump the dolphin and land on person B on 9/11 while person A is passively aggressing person E. Of course person D must be the one to kill the hobo. And then it's all round to undertoad's for haggis and hot chocolate.
[SIZE="3"]Truly, you have a dizzying intellect.[/SIZE]
I know. I'm surprised you aren't all blinded by my awesome every time I post
I'm reformed. I don't look at other people's awesome anymore.
hehe no it was the real life assholes. I just had hashbrowns and bacon to cheer myself up but I put too much oil in the pan so the hash brown were greasy. There's a cake in the oven because my friends are coming over for lunch (that was a very late breakfast) ....in one hour and my house is for shit.....
You make it sound like a problem.
you're really very petty.
I thought you said, "you're really very pretty."
I liked that better.
I'm pretty [COLOR="LightBlue"]irritating[/COLOR]
But you're not MoreThanPretty.
But you're not MoreThanPretty.
Oh! That's me!
Shaw *hugs*
I love your martyring, we need martyrs! Where would the x-tians be without them?
(I don't seriously think you're a martyr.)
Lets all just take a step back and look at something cute....like:
http://cellar.org/showpost.php?p=662275&postcount=1421
:p:
I think my cat is gone. She has been missing for 2 days. I have had her for 10 years, now. :(
maybe my perception is colored by our (spex and I) prior interactions, but I took that as him sticking up for Shawnee and being snarky. The whole 'taking sides' things.... meh.
Like you did by saying
you're really very petty.
?
Person A? Person B? Thrashes?
Why is it so hard to actually SAY wtf you're talking about? Do you think you're being polite or something?
you're really very petty. And a bitch.
Hope you find your cat Kerosene. Maybe it's trying to find the old house?
Sorry to hear about your friend, Clod.
I think my cat is gone. She has been missing for 2 days. I have had her for 10 years, now. :(
She maybe just shut in someone's garage or shed. Have you put signs around the area? people keep trying to adopt my friends' cat -she's small and does "pathetic" really well so they assume she''s a stray that needs feeding. Some try to turn her into an indoor cat, so she can be gone for a couple of days and be fine
Aw, I hope she turns up. Do what monster said with the flyers, and call your spca. When I found a cat once I looked for flyers and called the spca...
Sorry to hear that Kero - My cat has gone missing for days at a time before also. Seems like it always happens in the spring too. Hope yours comes home soon.
I had a cat that went missing for six weeks until a chance conversation with my nutty neighbor. He told me he thought she was a stray and he turned her in to animal control. Luckily, the warden's daughter fell in love with her and they didn't put her to sleep, but I felt like a shit heel when I took her from the girl.
That's got to be a weird story for that little girl.
Yeah, I had a cat. It was pretty cool but then my dad made me give it to some squirrell.
You gotta chip 'em. Really.
He told me he was tired of her shitting in his yard and he turned her in to animal control.
F
Found her! She was shut up in our "Silence of the Lambs" basement. I think she wanted to put the lotion in the basket. Usually we keep the door shut to the basement. I think she must have gone in there when one of the contractors was down there and then got locked in. Whew!
WOO HOO!!!!! thats gotta feel good :)
great! that must be some good soundproofing you have there! :lol:
Yeah, I think so...I would have thought we could hear her. This is a very old house and they just re-insulated it.
Just had my first returned card from Big Sarge.
Ie I sent a photo card and it's been returned for that address.
I think that means I'll get another two back - one more at least.
I knew he was leaving Iraq, but I didn't know whether he was srill in the Forces and whether they would forward his post to wherever he was.
This indicates that either he isn't, or they don't. Or both.
:(
If anyone hears from him please come back and let us know.
One of my weatlhiest client has been talking about TEOTWAWKI for quite some time and his investment shift over the last ten years has reflected his growing discomfort with the direction of the country and world. Today he has officially thrown in the towel. Within 7 days he will be 100% divested from the stock and bond markets.
He is going off the grid completely. He said he'll check in and let me know how he's doing a few times a year but he's out of here.
Is that a recommended strategy, LO? I'd be willing to entertain it.
I can't legally or morally recommend this or any other strategy, but I will say his plan isn't the worst I've seen.
Then again I'm just a nutjob fiat money hatin', government fearin', gun-totin, double belly buttoner so I may not be the best guy to ask.
I ran out of the house today to do a photo job just as the various nutkins were heading out to the beach, thus creating a conflict over use of the car. (They farted around until 2:30 before deciding to go to the beach)
So I leave to the music of blame, tears, guilt, scolding and demands to hurry.
I leave without a memory card for the camera and no checkbook with which to buy one when I get to the job. If I go home to get the card or the checkbook then by the time I get back to the job, the people have left for the day. Monday, the wrong people will be there.
As it is I get race home so the nutkins can go to the beach at least, and then Mrs. Nutkin farts around for another hour before she goes! I could have gone back and had about twenty minutes to get some key shots.
I'm steamed.
I'm steamed.
:comfort:
That sucks, dude.
Steamed squirell nuts - that's a delicacy just about anywhere.
im on vacation today , but that didnt stop my Cell phone from ringing at 7am 7:30 am 7:45am 8am like that till about 9:30 ,
i need to remember to just turn the damn thing OFF !!!!
Sore throat.
My own fault. I've smoked too much. When I am working on the computer I end up chain smoking without even really thinking about it. Now my throat hurts. I really want a cigarette. I am trying to hold off and not have one for a while.
Oww.
CEO still getting Too. Much. Spam.
Well V tell him to stop going to THOSE web Sites
CEO still getting Too. Much. Spam.
You gotta be firm with those EIEIOs. Make 'em understand, "Look, we have these rules in place for a reason--because reckless websurfing/emailing trashes computers and compromises the network. Just because you CAN make special exceptions for yourself doesn't mean you should."
My air conditioner appears to be going into a decline, and summer has barely even started. Plus Colorado Public Radio is going into an opera marathon and I HATE opera. Plus one of the cats just ate up my favorite plants. Some days its not worth getting out of bed.
I was just noticing some weird spatters all over the downstairs bathroom wall which has a fairly new, and nice paint job. I back brushed it to give it a nice texture, and it looks awesome. Except for those spatters which are about 6 feet from the floor, so it wasn't the minor nutkins.
Looking closer I recognize, from my potato canon days, that the spatters are hair spray. Since Mrs Nutkin is all crunchy granola it could only be our visiting Mary Kay shill. Not content with depleting the ozone she has to fuck up my walls.
What is this woman's problem? That shit better come off.
Good luck man. Its designed purpose is to glue hairs together. Ever think about how tiny the contact patch on a couple hairs can be? It's made to stick. It has a good grip on the wall (way bigger than a hair) and what do you have on your side?
This.A few candles in the bathroom/preening area could bring about a more lasting solution to the fundamental problem.
I was just noticing some weird spatters all over the downstairs bathroom wall which has a fairly new, and nice paint job. I back brushed it to give it a nice texture, and it looks awesome. Except for those spatters which are about 6 feet from the floor, so it wasn't the minor nutkins.
Looking closer I recognize, from my potato canon days, that the spatters are hair spray. Since Mrs Nutkin is all crunchy granola it could only be our visiting Mary Kay shill. Not content with depleting the ozone she has to fuck up my walls.
What is this woman's problem? That shit better come off.
Don't be too quick to judge - it could be the Cellar monkey. ^^^
No sleep in sight for me...danmit
My ego convinced me to fence over-tired last night and I tweaked my knee.:o
upsetting me today.... take a wild guess. I tried not to be hopeful, so i wouldn't be disappointed, but I just can't help myself ...it crept in there...there's always that chance, however tiny......
Plus Colorado Public Radio is going into an opera marathon and I HATE opera.
Listen to one of the other npr stations online.
Lost one of my favorite people, today to cancer. Trying to figure out how to get to Utah this weekend for the funeral.
Sorry to hear that Kero... oh and ...
Fuck Cancer
I was hoping someone would chime in with the curse on cancer. Thanks, you guys.
Death of the downstairs AC unit at the beginning of July. This will be expensive.
Bought expensive fillet knife, put it thru the dishwasher, then looked up "care and feeding of knives" on the mfg's web site...
"Don't do that."
Working overtime tomorrow (should be day off), despite the fact that we are slow and things are under control. I'm not needed. UGH!
Bought expensive fillet knife, put it thru the dishwasher, then looked up "care and feeding of knives" on the mfg's web site...
"Don't do that."
Aluminum rivets and a wood handle?
lol - he said expensive, didn't he.
Impatient people.
Don't call me up to your desk because you're "having trouble with your e-mail" only for me to find out that your Outlook was pulling in an e-mail with a large attachment. Don't get pissed when I, in turn, tell you to try being more patient. :mad:
Hey dmg, could you come to my desk please? I'm having trouble with my email.
(snicker)
HEY DMG,COME HERE, I NEED YOU. THIS STUPID COMPUTER KEEPS SHOUTING AT ME WHEN I TYPE
Hey dmg, could you come to my desk please? I'm having trouble with my email.
(snicker)
If it were me I'd come for a Snicker bar.
Are you kidding? It were you, you'd come for a prolonged smile.
Hey dmg, could you come to my desk please? I'm having trouble with my email.
(snicker)
BOOM. No, that wasn't fireworks. That was my head exploding. :p:
I'm safe because she's not in today. Maybe she'll take the rest of my career off....
OK monster...follow these directions exactly.
1. Open the window...
2. Unplug the computer...
:cool:
HEY DMG,COME HERE, I NEED YOU. THIS STUPID COMPUTER KEEPS SHOUTING AT ME WHEN I TYPE
Small engines, especially the Briggs-Stratton on my small rototiller.
I only need to use the tiller a couple of times a year, but each session turns into major frustration because it won't start without a hour or two of futszing about with "quick start" ether spray and help from grandson.
A couple of months ago I bought a new mower with B-S motor and so far it is starting easily. But I am wary that by the end of the summer the contagion from the tiller will have spread.
Grrrrr....
Just realized that Im not able to go to my 30th reunion at the end of this month, because my husband will be 3 hours away up in Grand Rapids Michigan for a wrestling tournament. I really dont want to go without him. <pouty lip big time>
You're even farther way! The reunion is in Hobart Indiana.
How far away from Grand Rapids are you? I may end up going with him instead.
Bottle of Pop, Big Banana,
We're from Hobart, Indiana
That's a lie, that's a bluff
We're from Michigan and we're tough
:D
2 bits
4 bits
6 bits a dollar
All for the Brickies
Stand up and holler!
Be Aggressive, B-E Aggressive....oh wait. Sorry.:blush:
I picked up a 10lb butt roast today. Frozen, after I thawed it, was 2 pieces. Looks like when they cut first time wasn't 10 lbs, so they wacked off more. Fucking hell. I told the ah that I wanted one to set on smoker with fat side up. After I return the small bit Tuesday, they might need to dial 911
Small engines, especially the Briggs-Stratton on my small rototiller.
I only need to use the tiller a couple of times a year, but each session turns into major frustration because it won't start without a hour or two of futszing about with "quick start" ether spray and help from grandson.
A couple of months ago I bought a new mower with B-S motor and so far it is starting easily. But I am wary that by the end of the summer the contagion from the tiller will have spread.
Grrrrr....
THIS
If you use something gas powered sporadically, you need to stabilize the fuel, or it will gum up your jets and stuff. Sounds like the rototiller issue.
I had issues with my chainsaw, weedeater and leaf blower until I learned about that stuff there.
Thanks LJ. I've used stabilizers over the winter, just not that brand.
I'll try it, but I'm a little leary of anything with B&S on it.
I just found out that one of the companies I was hoping to go through for our business, is no longer there/never was, or something like that. I placed a very large order ($982.00) a month ago, and about 10 days ago started to get very worried when I was still not given a tracking number, and my order was still not here. I have contacted Western Union, and the buggers have taken my money, but will not answer any emails sent to them. I have threatened contacting the police, but I doubt I will get anywhere.
My hubby just got laid off, so having $1000 go missing freaking hurts! Money or product... either way I would have been happy. Not only is it $1000 of my money, I had sold a few of the items and now owe the people product, or money as well. That was how I had $1000 to spend in the first place. BAH.
So now I have to contact the fraud department of Western Union, who by the way states its my fault, because they say in fine print not to send money to anyone that you don't know personally. I also have a guy in China threaten them in Chinese, and after he did, the website went away completely! So now I have to contact the Chinese/Canadian consollate (sp) and cross my fingers someone can help us get the products or our money back.
oh, that sounds dodgy, sorry jaydaan
Thanks LJ. I've used stabilizers over the winter, just not that brand.
I'll try it, but I'm a little leary of anything with B&S on it.
I was just recommending a stabilizer in general. It seemed to me like your symptoms indicated that you hadn't used one. I use Sta-bil, I just saw the B&E link first.
I just found out that one of the companies I was hoping to go through for our business, is no longer there/never was, or something like that. I placed a very large order ($982.00) a month ago, and about 10 days ago started to get very worried when I was still not given a tracking number, and my order was still not here. I have contacted Western Union, and the buggers have taken my money, but will not answer any emails sent to them. I have threatened contacting the police, but I doubt I will get anywhere.
My hubby just got laid off, so having $1000 go missing freaking hurts! Money or product... either way I would have been happy. Not only is it $1000 of my money, I had sold a few of the items and now owe the people product, or money as well. That was how I had $1000 to spend in the first place. BAH.
So now I have to contact the fraud department of Western Union, who by the way states its my fault, because they say in fine print not to send money to anyone that you don't know personally. I also have a guy in China threaten them in Chinese, and after he did, the website went away completely! So now I have to contact the Chinese/Canadian consollate (sp) and cross my fingers someone can help us get the products or our money back.
We just managed to extricate my MIL from a similar scam. I'm very sorry you got taken.
Ugghh that totally sucks Jaydaan. Hope that someone can help.
So sorry to hear that Jaydaan :(
Mine is small beer in that case - I've coloured my hair and I don't like it.
I wanted a strawberry blonde or copper effect. It's the colour of biscuits. It's just so odd.
Am going to sleep on it. Then bleach it.
That totally sucks, move on and cut your losses. You will never see that money again.
Western Union is ONLY for sending money to someone you know personally. Ever.
As you probably discovered, even though you send the $ to New York for example, the person you are sending it to can pick it up in San Diego.
That shit makes ebay and pay pal seem like fort knox.
Got a letter from the Benefits Office today.
I am no longer eligible for my benefit. This follows a medical review dated 25.05.10.
Which means I was not elegible from 26.05.10.
Not only does this mean the payment due this Monday (19.07.10) will not be paid into my bank account - which I was reasonably relying on to pay my commitments - but that I actually owe the Govt money. Talk about a shock. I cried for hours, called the office, asked about a "crisis loan", went to the Job Centre (still crying).
I have £49 instead of £180. Which is to be repaid.
My two debt payments due out on Monday are not taken into consideration - I do understand why, but if I don't pay I would be penalised for not meeting the agreed payment schedule. The money they have given me (for food and essential living costs) does cover that, but it means I have no money to buy things like cat litter, packed lunches for school, my share of household goods (I buy whatever is needed every fortnight) etc etc.
I know it's technically a handout.
But when you rely on it and plan for it, to have it suddenly not appear with less than a weeks notice is pretty bloody hard. Thank goodness I live with the 'rents - although I'm scared stiff about telling them.
So it looks like back to work if I can find it and no more volunteering for me. And less chance of my ideal job. I think perhaps my best hope is to try and find a part time job with children and fall back on my parents' mercy re not having any money for as long as they live here. Once they sell this house I'll be up shit creek, but no point borrowing trouble - especially in this market.
Oh, Sundae - I am so sorry. What a true and horrible shock - no notice and no way to appeal this decision?
oh, honey.
I feel shocked for you....
That sucks, girl. I'm so sorry. :(
SG that so sucks! Just when you think its all going well life hands you one on a plate! Pick yourself up dust yourself off and keep in mind tomorrow has to be better than today. At least you have parents to help you.
SG, I'm sorry. Seems very unfair to me. They should be giving you more notice than that.
Got a letter from the Benefits Office today. I am no longer eligible for my benefit. This follows a medical review dated 25.05.10. Which means I was not elegible from 26.05.10.
Why did it take them so long to notify you? That seems very unusual. I get notices months in advance regarding that type of thing.
Still sucks, they should have given you much more warning. Nothing like a little time to plan accordingly.
Short notice is one thing, but telling you you have to give back the money they accidentally gave you a month ago and more? That's ballsy. Sorry SG.
Didn't they tell you at the medical review that you were no longer going to be eligable?
Short notice is one thing, but telling you you have to give back the money they accidentally gave you a month ago and more? That's ballsy. Sorry SG.
Ugh...yeah...we actually have to do that a lot in my work too. :(
Same thing with Social Security or Unemployment in the US.
When you are retired (>62) and getting SS and die, the friendly folk at SS go straight into your bank account and withdraw that month's payment.
They argue that SS payments are made in advance, and since you died during that month you were not entitled to that month's payment !
Darling Hector's Goalie Stick broke. He is sad. More so because he's tired, but it still sucks. Big welling up tears that he tries to hold back in big blue eyes.
He set his heart on playing hockey in December, when he could barely skate. He spent 4 months in an instructional program. He worked hard. Then he joined a spring league for which he had to learn to check. He worked hard. He spent six weeks playing hockey 3-4 times a week. At the end of the season, he set his heart on being a goalie. He started by moving to goal in soccer. Now he spends all his spare time out on his roller blades with a stick and ball or watching goalie vids on youtube. He works hard.
I found some cheap but good condition goalie leg pads. He rollerblades in those, and practices the butterfly. Not an easy move on rollerblades. Last week, I found an ice hockey goalie stick the right hand and right size for $3. And a couple of street hockey goalie sticks and helmets. He was made up. He practiced with the street stuff and loved the ice stick.
Summer clinics started this week. The powers that be arranged for him to practice with the one for the age group below his as well as his own -as a goalie. On Tuesday, they kitted him out and approved his stick as in suitable condition etc. Tonight was his second time out. In a clinic with kids up to 4 years older. The biggest and bestest kid took a slapshot, which Hector saved with the end of his stick. Alas,"Woody" was KIA.
RIP Woody.
He has a replacement loaner stick, but I suspect it's like writing off your first car.
Awww, poor kid. This was so nicely written, though, monster. It must be hard to see your kids disappointed and sad, especially when they've worked hard for something.
I will raise a toast to Woody tonight. :)
This morning the sadness is mostly replaced with a quiet pride in a valiant sacrifice :lol: he's carrying it around like a trophy.
Wonderful! Thats coo'. Look how tough I am, I broke this stick...
I tried to reply about 3 times earlier... never came out right.
Good for him!
Why did it take them so long to notify you? That seems very unusual. I get notices months in advance regarding that type of thing.
Still sucks, they should have given you much more warning. Nothing like a little time to plan accordingly.
It wasn't the notification that took so long, it was probably reviewing the paperwork. The letter itself was dated 13 July, so it only took two days to reach me - pretty good for the Benefits office.
Didn't they tell you at the medical review that you were no longer going to be eligable?
No, the review is to ensure whether you are eligible, no mention of the fact that is might take two months to reach a decision and you might get four days notice. Last time I got my decision through within a week. To be honest, if I'd realised the criteria I would be judged on I would have answered accordingly - it would still have been the truth, but I'd have been aware of what the triggers are.
I am appealing the decision, and while the appeal is going through they will pay me at the Appraisal rate (a lot lower, but still something). But they can't start that until they receive the appeal form. Which I have to fill in and send back along with evidence. It hasn't arrived yet.
I am tempted to just give it up and apply for Job Seekers' Allowance. It will help my self-worth to be back on the jobs market. Especially over the summer when I won't be at school. I do feel I am able to get up in the mornings now, and commit to a working day. I have grown in confidence during the time of volunterring and have never felt the paralysing dread I used to feel on a workday when I was in the NHS. It was more the shock of finding myself not only penniless but actually in debt which hit me yesterday. Especially as I've taken control over all my debts and am now only paying back two out of the original six.
It's a setback. Not a disaster. I've bounced back in trickier circumstances. At least I have a goal in mind now - getting to do the job I volunteer for and getting paid for it! I'll admit I so could have done without it though.
Mum and I were going to a bonding meal at the local catering college the week after next. Three course set meal for £10.
The best laid plans of mice and men, eh?
Summer “Credit Crunch” Menu
Starters
Cream of Tomato and Basil Soup
Crab, Avocado and Pink Grapefruit Salad
Main Courses
Pan-Fried Supreme of Salmon with wilted Spinach and herb Butter
Escalope of Breaded Pork with Boulangere Potato and Sauce Provençal
Tatin of Roasted Shallot, Beetroot and Goat’s Cheese with Tomato Coulis
Section of new potatoes and vegetables
Desserts
White Chocolate Mousse with Passion Fruit Coulis
Fresh Fruit Salad
Tea, Coffee or Fruit Infusions - £1.00
Yumyum :sniff:
Sundae; you'll still be able to volunteer whilst you are claiming Job seekers Allowance (if they decide to dismiss you appeal). You can only do 16 hours per week (I believe) and you have to be able to show that you're actively seeking work, as well as understand that if they suddenly decide to send you on a jobseeker course, or you find a job, you'll go with that.
This sort of sudden notice is unfortunately very common. Don;t be too put out by the money they are saying you owe them. If worse comes to worst, and you do end up with that debt, they usually accept ridiculously low repayments, which you can have taken directly out of your JSA benefits. You can probably argue no more than £5 a fortnight.
Still, a kick in the teeth :(
The problem with the medical assessments that they do for this is that it is not the doctor's job to assess if you have medical problems. It is the doctor's job to assess whether or not you are capable of work. That means any work, of any kind, for any amount of hours. They absolutely do not take into account the fact that a lot of things that render someone incapable of work aren't constant, they come and go. This means they are particularly bad at assessing any kind of mental health issues such as depression.
What this all means is actually, the worst possible thing you can do in these assessments is answer their questions truthfully and without attempting to actively skew their decision. Their default setting is to try and prove that you are capable of work. Your default setting needs therefore to be trying to prove incapacity. Every time you give an answer that might suggest that at some level they can expect you to go to work; you need to include sufficient caveats to that to give them pause for thought.
I 'played' that system for a couple of years. I genuinely was not able to cope with a workplace environment at the time. I had to play up elements of the depression I was going through and play down my capacity to cope, because otherwise they'd have thrown me in at a deep end in whch i would have drowned. At the same time, having to try and give the impression that i actually wanted to go to work (less difficult for you I'd imagine).
It's a shit way of assessing people. The more honest you are, the less likely you are to get the help you need.
Dana is wise grasshopper.
My good friend's daughter has just started down the road to being autistic, but my friend doesn't understand or believe it yet.
Update: my friend's daughter is now speaking maybe half as much as she was 6 weeks ago. My friend says she's "going through a shy phase." Of what she does say, about a third is now unintelligible. My friend says that "her speech is advancing so rapidly, she's saying all these new phrases and I can't keep up with what she's telling me." She is also "going through a phase" where she is terrified of moderately loud noises, and her arms are suddenly hyper-sensitive to touch, to the point that she will throw tantrums when, say, a bath towel is used to dry them off.
For those of you who still think I'm pulling this stuff out of my ass, keep in mind that I should have a less than 1% chance of correctly predicting a random child's diagnosis.
I am soooo sick of coming home to no one to talk to. There's too much stuff in my head for this right now. I can't wait until he's somewhere that I can go too.
Not exactly "upsetting", but sad... MIL is here right now, and just received an email that the second of our cats that we left behind in the UK with her died peacefully earlier today. She was 17, so it was a good age, and she wasn't suffering like her brother who was euthenised a year or so ago. RIP Artemis (Temi)
Today on the phone my father asked if I'd "taken any trips, gone anywhere interesting" recently. I mean, I know he's a little oblivious to the realities of my daily life, but come on. Christ on a cracker.
Seems like everyone around us is divorcing right now... family included... I know I shouldn't take it personally... Flint and I are great, but I am deeply saddned... and confused... I feel a deep loss. Even the family we had designated to get our kids gawd forbid something happen to us... getting divorced... I just don't know what to do... it really fucks things up for us... we thought long and hard before deciding on them and there is literally no one else I can imagine filling their shoes.
Perhaps they can each take one?
J and I'll raise the Pookaflintsters, if you give us a dowry of some insurance money. We won't need much, just enough for some vittles and sunday dress.
Money will not be an issue for them... we have a niiiiice trust fund for them. ITs the right family with similar values and financially stable set up that is going to be hard to replace... they wouldn't have needed to touch the trust... and if they did... I trust that she would have had no other choice. She is still willing to take them... he is not a viable option at the moment... but we both agree it should be a couple... with a child close in age to ours... only one with no intention of having more kids, well off, musically inclined, and a long time friend of the family... they were it... we don't have any one else... it makes me feel a little uncomfortable... not that I think we are going to die tomorrow... but you never know. Plus... they were our closest couple friends.
my lack of emotional self control is upsetting me lately.
is that redundant?
recursive
Sorry dude, chin up.
Dad fell out of bed, injured his shoulder, in the hospital.:(
In about 10 minutes they'll pull the plug on my aunt. We haven't talked, written, or anything with her for decades, but recently my father has been calling and talking to her. He couldn't get there (health issues himself) and he is very upset that when someone finally called to tell him where she has been (he was leaving messages) he finds out she's on life support and wouldn't know if he was there or not. So now he knows at 10 AM his last sister is going to die. Wait - probably gone by now, different time zone, I forgot 'bout that. (I'm OK, but he won't be, which means nobody will be who is in that same state.)
Sorry sweetwater. :( This is a good reminder for me to keep in touch with my own brother. Life isn't forever.
LL has been awesome all summer. Really since about February. We got his medication sorted enough that while there are still some obvious issues, we had decided we were at a "good enough" level of control. He is now on his 5th day of fourth grade and all progress is erased, or at least hidden. I hope it is temporary because there aren't many alternative treatments so if it turns out this med has stopped working we're pretty well screwed.
I am hoping that it is just a settling in period for being back to school, but that seems unlikely. His schedule all summer was basically the same because of the camp program he was involved in.
ugghhh - sorry - Still hoping for the best. I'm sure you guys will figure something out.
Dang, lookout. Any chance there is a particular problem with the teacher, or a specific kid in the class who is setting him off?
Loves his teacher. Loves the school. Loves all the kids in his class except for one but that is already handled. * Today he is tired and edgy, but I gave him a 30 minute window to just chill out on his own. He may just be overstimulated and having a hard time transitioning from school to home. I know that sounds lame, but it is the best way to describe it. I'm going to give him another full week before I become officially worried.
[COLOR="White"]* The first day LL came home complaining that there was a bully who elbowed him in the face, so LL told the teacher. The child was scolded so the kid punched LL and elbowed his friend. he complained to me and mrs L and we just reminded him that he already has groundrules on how to deal with bullies.
Apparently, the bullying continued on the second day. The teacher talked to me about it because she was concerned I might be upset. I let her know I'm sure that she and the children would figure it out.
The 3rd day it continued until gym class where LL flattened the kid on the soccer field and then screamed in his face that it would get worse unless the kid stayed away from him and his friend. The gym teacher and his regular teacher both saw the incident. They officially asked me to talk to LL about letting the teachers handle inappropriate behavior. Unofficially, they said the kid had it coming and he hasn't bothered anyone since he got up off the ground.[/COLOR]
So effectively the first three days were taken up with a problem with a specific kid, then he's had two more days and now he's tired and edgy. i wouldn't give up hope yet -I'd be tired and edgy too, if that were my first week back at school.
Yeah, given what little I know about LL, I'd guess that he's still watching the other kid like a hawk, waiting to see if he makes another move. He's not going to trust that this problem is really over for at least another week, would be my estimate, but then if the kid stays in his place I imagine LL will be able to relax a little more.
Probably tired of sitting still, after tearing around all summer.
Ah, LilLookout... just like his pop, only without the concealed carry. Yet.
Ah, LilLookout... just like his pop, only without the concealed carry. Yet.
Ha ha. Hence LL's admonishment, "It will get worse."
Seems like everyone around us is divorcing right now... family included... I know I shouldn't take it personally... Flint and I are great, but I am deeply saddned... and confused... I feel a deep loss. Even the family we had designated to get our kids gawd forbid something happen to us... getting divorced... I just don't know what to do... it really fucks things up for us... we thought long and hard before deciding on them and there is literally no one else I can imagine filling their shoes.
The network of social bonds that surround and support us are being severed, and it is highly disturbing.
There is a disturbance in the force.And all these disturbances have one thing in common... you. :lol2:
Pooka & Flint - that sucks. I'm guessing you guys are in your mid to late 30's. That's when I remember many people I knew started getting divorced.
Unhappy because holidays are finished : As of today, it's back to the salt mines...
Pooka & Flint - that sucks. I'm guessing you guys are in your mid to late 30's. That's when I remember many people I knew started getting divorced.
It is like that burst of weddings in your twenties only sucky.
Sucky is most certainly an understatement.
It is like that burst of weddings in your twenties only sucky.
The up side is, you don't have to get dressed up and buy a gift.
Well that is a break. :)
Upset: People who whine about unfair taxes after getting their education paid for by taxpayers and are finally in a position to pay. :mad2:
[dexter]STUUUUUUUUUUPID [/dexter] Coworkers that Don't Understand what is going on ,
Argue with you have you Have a simple Straight forward Plan to solve the Problem ,
Stand around like DOT Workers( watching and Not helping) as You work to Solve Their Problem ,
Oh and stand Physically in your way as you scurry about trying to do Their Job too
Kick 'em in the cunt, zip.
[dexter]STUUUUUUUUUUPID [/dexter] Coworkers that Don't Understand what is going on ,
Argue with you have you Have a simple Straight forward Plan to solve the Problem ,
Stand around like DOT Workers( watching and Not helping) as You work to Solve Their Problem ,
Oh and stand Physically in your way as you scurry about trying to do Their Job too
Those people are breeding faster and faster.
Those people are breeding faster and faster.
The trend for many of these folks is becoming "go to school". Not the homework and the footwork and the paperwork part, or the problem-solving or the comparing and contrasting or the thirst for knowledge part, just the "go to school" part.
:p:
I just took a shower but I didn't wait long enough after my run and I'm just as wet as I was in the shower, despite the air conditioning
Ut-oh, you know what happens when you get your monster wet.
monster got very wet very many times today. run -wet. shower -wet. stil not recovered from run -wet. shower -wet. vacuum car in a hurry -wet. swim -wet. Now I'm wetting my throat with a well earned beer ;)
While driving to work in the right lane of two in my direction, a driver in the left lane two car lengths ahead of me slowed down abruptly to turn left onto a side street. The driver of a SUV behind it was following too closely to stop in time; so, he jerked his vehicle over into my lane. Unfortunately, my car occupied the space he was headed into and I had to brake, swerve off the road and over a curb to avoid the collision. My vehicle came to rest with the front half in somebody's front yard. I had slowed down enough that going over the curb didn't cause any damage and there wasn't anything else in my path.
Fortunately, the driver of the SUV pulled over on the next side street and waited for me to get back on the road and to pull up next to him. That action and the fact that the first words out of his twenty-something year old mouth were to ask if I was OK saved him a lot of grief. If I would have had to chase him down, he would have gotten more than just a defensive driving lecture.
In late 2007 we got a LG dishwasher but didn't install it until the past January.
Now the motor has gone out... along with the 2-yr warranty.
The repairman says he's installed several motors on this model.
A $300 repair on an appliance that was actually used for only 7 months.
Grrrrrrap !
My last child leaves for college in the am.
I think you posted that in the wrong thread.
She posted it in every fucking thread. Is there a wrong thread for an attention ho?
It's nearly 2 in the fucking morning and it's still fucking hot.
Lookout, be grateful that LL's school either doesn't have that zero-tolerance bullshit, or the teachers understand when to look the other way.
What's upsetting me today?
My freaking children.
I have three going very cheap right now!
Going very cheap? Is that an Aussie thing?
In late 2007 we got a LG dishwasher but didn't install it until the past January.
Now the motor has gone out... along with the 2-yr warranty.
The repairman says he's installed several motors on this model.
A $300 repair on an appliance that was actually used for only 7 months.
Grrrrrrap !
1st technician visit $95.00 - Dx: motor bad - need to order part - coming from Alabama !
2nd technican call $192.50 - part will not arrive til Mon - OK to schedule repair for Tues ?
Jeez - No parts warehouse west of the Mississippi
It's like LG Corp never had a motor go out on a dishwasher on the west coast before this one.
Double Grrrrrrap !
Going very cheap? Is that an Aussie thing?
Cheap? It means inexpensive.
My post meant I'll just about give them away...in fact, at the time I would have paid someone to take them. :)
Going very cheap? Is that an Aussie thing?
No. I'd say that too. You really haven't heard the phrase?
Cheap? It means inexpensive.
My post meant I'll just about give them away...in fact, at the time I would have paid someone to take them. :)
Duh. :smack:
Day three of looking after my friend's cats and they're both missing. Didn't come home last night or this morning. One of them is a regular disappearer -I've been to all the places she usually ends up, one of them saw her yesterday, but she went again. The other one is supposed to never venture very far from his food bowl. Well done, monster, nice work :(
There's a stream at the end of their land, and apparently there's a tree over it such that the disappearer can get across but not back. but I've been to all the places on the other side of the stream and nada. She has a collar and tag and chip and the "Send me Home" people whose number is on her tag have my number for this week, but nothing.
If it were my cats (whose mom is the disappearer) I wouldnt worry so much, but they're not and both of them at the same time is nuts. And one has a habit of getting herself "adopted".....
....and I have a tax return i need to be doing today......
Crap.
Have you tried shaking a bag of cat food outside, or another noise they hear when it's feeding time? The disappearer might be on a Milo and Otis type adventure, but the other one might be nearby but hiding.
Hope you find them. :(
yeah, I've been out with the shaky rattly food and dinging a spoon agaianst the dish and I even went so far as to take an open can of wet fishy flovored food out and waft it around. Nada.
Well fudge.
(Using awesome mind powers to will kittehs home.)
stupid animals don't know which side their bread's buttered mutter mumble better have their asses waiting on the porch next time I go over.....
Cats remind me of the double high fiving squirrels in the car crash commercial.
Leave em alone and they will come home waggin their tails behind them!
[fingers crossed for you]
They're Back! thanks for listening, guys :)
Oh good! I would have been really worried too. I won't even say: Did you doubt my awesome kitteh mind powers, hmmm? (Oh, I guess I just said it.)
One's gone again tonight. Hope she's having a good time ;)
I ran out of my restless leg medicine and my legs are restless.
RRRRRRRR.
Lotion them all up and point a fan at them.
Lotion them all up and point a fan at them.
My legs?
One's gone again tonight. Hope she's having a good time ;)
two nights :(
No, I just wanted to see if I could get you to do that.
No, I just wanted to see if I could get you to do that.
good one! I nearly did!
srsly, though - it's really annoying.
It helps me when I think I have restless legs, but it comes and goes with me, Ive never been diagnosed or medicated.
Colder the better though, for me.
I'll probably jinx® it but I started taking calcium magnesium and mineral supplements a few weeks ago and my restless leg has stopped. Maybe tonight it will start up again.
three nights. they've sent me a missing poster to put up etc. fukkit
Lotion them all up and point a fan at them.
My legs?
Legs/feet.
that helps?
No, I just wanted to see if I could get you to do that.
Yes, it really helps. Do you have a webcam? Now, dip your feet into a vat of jello, and slowly, slowly, shave your legs with an old electric razor from the 1950s. Take a drag off a cigarette and blow smoke rings at a Mexican housekeeper's butthole.
What do you mean by restless legs?
I thought Rush told us not to believe in RLS.
I thought Rush told us not to believe in RLS.
I think oxycontin helps control RLS. ;)
I really hate my life and myself right now. There is nothing major wrong, just all the little stuff is snowballing and I can't seem to find the time/energy/decision making skills to actually handle the issues. Also some of the things I find myself dissatisfied/disgusted with are vain and petty, but bother me constantly. I know shouldn't hate my life, but right now I do.
Sorry for the emo/whine post.
I'm sorry you're having a hard time right now, MTP. :(
You won't feel this way forever - one thing is certain - this too shall pass.
Pet your doggie I promise you will feel better MTP!
Pet your doggie I promise you will feel better MTP!
She's been having potty accidents although I take her out every 2-3 hrs. She won't even be seemingly "asking" to go out. I'm gonna start giving her praise/treats for going outside, which I had stopped doing the treats and just gave praise because she seemed to not have any issues. Oh, and she's gained 3lbs since I got her on June 10. I have been following the feeding guides. :(
I feel like a horrible dog owner.
Aww how old is she? Does she have a crate to be in when you are not there? The only way to effectively house train a dog is to crate train them. Giving them the run of the house before they are HB prolongs their training. She will get it eventually. :) Not hard to take some food out of her diet. You are not a horrible dog owner if you love your dog.
Aww how old is she? Does she have a crate to be in when you are not there? The only way to effectively house train a dog is to crate train them. Giving them the run of the house before they are HB prolongs their training. She will get it eventually. :) Not hard to take some food out of her diet. You are not a horrible dog owner if you love your dog.
She has the accidents when we're home. Last night she did it right in front of us. This morning while I was up and getting ready she went on the bathroom floor even though she had already been out. I don't think she's ever had an accident while she was alone, if I'm at my parent's she is left in my bedroom or when its nice out, a pen outside (only for about 4-5hrs usually). I've been staying at my b/f's a lot and she has the run of the apartment then. Still only seems to be doing it when we're home.
She's 2yrs old.
The only way to effectively house train a dog is to crate train them.
I had never heard of crating dogs, or cats, until living in the US. yet they all seemed to get house trained just fine.
It strikes me as bizarre and cruel, it's a cultural thing, the people I know with dogs they seem to be OK.
I saw this on one those dog training shows, quite possible the one with the English woman.
Submissive UrinationI use to crate Pico when we would leave the house. I didn't like it much, but he had proven over and over again that he rather likes using our carpet as a pee receptacle. Then one day I decided to put him in the bathroom because we were going to be away for quite a while - he peed in the bathtub! And he has done it several times since. So now thats where I put him. I still crate him at night though - at least hes in the bedroom with me.
My mom sent me this forward. 1: I don't understand why she thinks all this crap is true. 2: Why the fuck I would ever buy into this shit.
This is very scary stuff and if we don't want this to come about in our lifetimes, we had better get busy and take our country back.
May God's countenance shine upon you and grant you peace
(Mom's addition)
Subject: FW: "Joys" of Muslim women
The woman is certainly real and seems to be what the article indicates. I have done some reading about her. If this is all true, it is certainly very sobering.
Joys of Muslim Women
Note very carefully the paragraph in red
This was written by a woman born in Egypt as a Muslim. This is not hearsay, and it will scare you.
Make sure you read the paragraph (in red) towards the end.
Joys of Muslim Women by Nonie Darwish
In the Muslim faith a Muslim man can marry a child as young as 1 Year old and have sexual intimacy with this child, consummating the marriage by 9. The dowry is given to the family in exchange for the woman (who becomes his slave) and for the purchase of the private parts of the woman, to use her as a toy.
Even though a woman is abused, she can not obtain a divorce. To prove rape, the woman must have (4) male witnesses. Often after a woman has been raped, she is returned to her family and the family must return the dowry. The family has the right to execute her (an honor killing) to restore the honor of the family. Husbands can beat their wives 'at will' and the man does not have to say why he has beaten her.
The husband is permitted to have 4 wives and a temporary wife for an hour (prostitute) at his discretion.
The Shariah Muslim law controls the private as well as the public life of the woman.
In the Western World ( America ) Muslim men are starting to demand Shariah Law so the wife can not obtain a divorce and he can have full and complete control of her. It is amazing and alarming how many of our sisters and daughters attending American Universities are now marrying Muslim men and submitting themselves and their children unsuspectingly to the Shariah law.
By passing this on, enlightened American women may avoid becoming a slave under Shariah Law.
Ripping the West in Two. Author and lecturer Nonie Darwish says the goal of radical Islamists is to impose Shariah law on the world, ripping Western law and liberty in two.
She recently authored the book, Cruel and Usual Punishment: The Terrifying Global Implications of Islamic Law.
Darwish was born in Cairo and spent her childhood in Egypt and Gaza before immigrating to America in 1978, when she was eight years old. Her father died while leading covert attacks on Israel . He was a High-ranking Egyptian military officer stationed with his family in Gaza.
When he died, he was considered a "shahid," a martyr for jihad. His posthumous status earned Nonie and her family an elevated position in Muslim society.
But Darwish developed a skeptical eye at an early age. She questioned her own Muslim culture and upbringing. She converted to Christianity after hearing a Christian preacher on television.
In her latest book, Darwish warns about creeping sharia law - what it is, what it means, and how it is manifested in Islamic countries.
For the West, she says radical Islamists are working to impose sharia on the world. If that happens, Western civilization will be destroyed. Westerners generally assume all religions encourage a respect for the dignity of each individual. Islamic law (Sharia) teaches that non-Muslims should be subjugated or killed in this world.
Peace and prosperity for one's Children is not as important as assuring that Islamic law rules everywhere in the Middle East and eventually in the world.
While Westerners tend to think that all religions encourage some form of the golden rule, Sharia teaches two systems of ethics - one for Muslims and another for non-Muslims. Building on tribal practices of the seventh century, Sharia encourages the side of humanity that wants to take from and subjugate others.
While Westerners tend to think in terms of religious people developing a personal understanding of and relationship with God, Sharia advocates executing people who ask difficult questions that could be interpreted as criticism.
It's hard to imagine, that in this day and age, Islamic scholars agree that those who criticize Islam or choose to stop being Muslim should be executed. Sadly, while talk of an Islamic reformation is common and even assumed by many in the West, such murmurings in the Middle
East are silenced through intimidation.
While Westerners are accustomed to an increase in religious tolerance over time, Darwish explains how petro dollars are being used to grow an extremely intolerant form of political Islam in her native Egypt and elsewhere.
In twenty years there will be enough Muslim voters in the U.S. To elect the President by themselves! Rest assured they will do so... You can look at how they have taken over several towns in the USA .. Dearborn Mich. Is one... And there are others...
I think everyone in the U.S. Should be required to read this, but with the ACLU, there is no way this will be widely publicized, unless each of us sends it on!
It is too bad that so many are disillusioned with life and Christianity to accept Muslims as peaceful.. Some may be but they have an army that is willing to shed blood in the name of Islam.. the peaceful support the warriors with
their finances and own kind of patriotism to their religion. While America is getting rid of Christianity from all public sites and erasing God from the lives of children the Muslims are planning a great jihad on America ..
This is your chance to make a difference...! Pass it on to your email list or at least those you think will listen..
I had never heard of crating dogs, or cats, until living in the US. yet they all seemed to get house trained just fine.
It strikes me as bizarre and cruel, it's a cultural thing, the people I know with dogs they seem to be OK.
I saw this on one those dog training shows, quite possible the one with the English woman.
Submissive Urination
That ran across my mind too, but I don't see any of the other signs of submission. Its both urination and defecation, at random. I don't usually see her do it, but I'll know a spot was clean, and then a little bit later she'll have dirtied it. Maybe she's mad at me or is marking territory.
Have you tried leashing her to you when you are home? I did it with Pico when I first brought him home and I did see a result after a while. (He just isn't consistent - being the silly chihuahua that he is)
I had never heard of crating dogs, or cats, until living in the US. yet they all seemed to get house trained just fine.
It strikes me as bizarre and cruel, it's a cultural thing, the people I know with dogs they seem to be OK.
I saw this on one those dog training shows, quite possible the one with the English woman.
Submissive Urination
I disagree. I can't speak to cats, but
dogs ≠ people
Dogs are den animals and, in general, like confined spaces. See UT's post about his dog burrowing under his pillow.
If you can train your dog without using a kennel, more power to you. I assume you have the leisure of spending every waking moment with your pup.
But a kennel is invaluable in keeping the puppy from making mistakes. If you can't watch the puppy every moment the dog is awake, then keeping it in the kennel (when you can't keep an eye on it) is the more humane thing to do.
I've raised three dogs this way. They've all been happy dogs and the only time they have ever had a mistake in the house is when they've been sick.
OTOH, anything can be abused. Keeping your dog in the kennel when it is unnecessary, is as bad as dumping your kids in front of a tv as a babysitter.
That ran across my mind too, but I don't see any of the other signs of submission. Its both urination and defecation, at random. I don't usually see her do it, but I'll know a spot was clean, and then a little bit later she'll have dirtied it. Maybe she's mad at me or is marking territory.
There's a lot of possibilities. Sick? Abandonment issues (have you been gone more than usual)? Your vet or a good dog book will have more on the subject.
Make sure you use an odor neutralizer (not an odor masker) available at any pet store. Dogs want to go where they've gone before. The odor neutralizer actually modifies the urine/bm smell by breaking the traces down chemically.
I had never heard of crating dogs, or cats, until living in the US. yet they all seemed to get house trained just fine.
It strikes me as bizarre and cruel, it's a cultural thing, the people I know with dogs they seem to be OK.
Dogs don't miind crating. They like to have a place of their own; if it's enclosed like a cave, they like it better.
Funny story and too-much-information time. I crate-trained Pearl, and she still has her crate but the only time it's useful is when J and I are, you know, doin' it :doit:
You don't want your dog interrupting
NSFW BELOW! NSFW BELOW! I AM NOT KIDDING! NSFW!!!! DO NOT SCROLL DOWN UNLESS YOU WANT TO SEE A BJ IN ACTION! It IS AN ANIMATED GIF!
Yeah. You don't want your dog interrupting.
So I crate Pearl before. She knows the word "crate" so it's easy.
Now the funny bit. J and I are getting romantic on a whim while downstairs on the couch. And so we head upstairs. I wonder where Pearl is, so she can be crated. I call her. No answer. I start downstairs but I realize...
Pearl is in her crate. She has sensed what is going on and has crated herself.
Good dog!!!
Pearl has never been the most intelligent dog, but she is always sensitive to the needs of the pack, a kind of intelligence that we don't measure.
DO they make crates for kids?
[YOUTUBE]3PpYasA94sU[/YOUTUBE]
"I can't believe this, I bet my daughter knows my name."
Sheesh. Just found out a woman in another office had a massive heart attack last night and passed away. I didn't know her except in passing, but she was really nice. An immediate cow orker gave her rides to work quite often, and I bet he is very upset (and not here today.)
Life's short, people. Live as well and happy as you can. :(
DO they make crates for kids?
Yup, but for kids they call 'em playpens.
Not exactly upsetting, but a lot more than mildly irritating or groove scorching, is the state of Australia's election.
It looks like we will have a hung parliament, with the largest bloc (73 - 76 needed for a majority) being the Lib/Nat coalition, headed by Tony "the Mad Monk" Abbot. I do not want him to be PM. His attitudes would have gone well in about 1935; got elected largely by manipulating xenophobia about boat people.
The best thing is a substantial swing to the Greens, my party of first preference, but they just managed to win their first lower-house seat, and are a decade of phenomenal growth away from actually being a government.
So, in general: crap. Next election might be three years away. Unless the minority government thing doesn't work - then we might be back at the polls sooner.
It's official. Two spots on my arms, one on my shoulder, and a new one on my scalp. The cancer is back. $3000 to take care of the last patch and I damn well don't have the the extra cash to take care of this shit.
If you had to choose between treating stupid but ugly cancers and your kid's very real mental issues which would you choose? Yeah, me too.
Oh Lookout! but you need to look after you so that you can look after the little one ...
Remember that his mental issues will not be served by losing his dad early on... Does "ugly" mean "completely, 100% benign, and there's absolutely no chance we're wrong about that?" Because otherwise, take care of yourself.
ugghhh tough choices. Any help from the state available?
It's official. Two spots on my arms, one on my shoulder, and a new one on my scalp. The cancer is back. $3000 to take care of the last patch and I damn well don't have the the extra cash to take care of this shit.
If you had to choose between treating stupid but ugly cancers and your kid's very real mental issues which would you choose? Yeah, me too.
Damm, sorry to hear it.
It's official. Two spots on my arms, one on my shoulder, and a new one on my scalp. The cancer is back. $3000 to take care of the last patch and I damn well don't have the the extra cash to take care of this shit.
If you had to choose between treating stupid but ugly cancers and your kid's very real mental issues which would you choose? Yeah, me too.
That sucks LO, hope you're able to find help. There should be state or federal resources....
That sucks LO, hope you're able to find help. There should be state or federal resources....
There should be national health care or at least affordable insurance that actually pays claims, but that's a different story.
Sorry to hear about that Lookout, but I'll jump on the bandwagon to say, you need to stay healthy for your kids.
Mine is partially my own fault...I lost a friend, as in they stopped being my friend I guess.
Here's the story the best I can tell it...
Friend and I hung out, got a bit drunk. Her fiance called...got pissed that she was hanging out with me and my B/F (I think her fiance is a little-dicked emotionally abusive loser idiot). He breaks up with her because she can't be trusted. I attempt to make her feel better, a little bit happens b/t her and I. (My B/F is perfect OK with this)....
Next day, come to find out her (now ex) fiance told her parents (she lives with them) that she had drunk with me. She's 21 in 2wks but still got in trouble. Haven't talked to her since, I just figured it was 'cuz she was in trouble.
Well, we were supposed to have a class together (I was only taking it to take with her). It started yesterday, and she wasn't there. She dropped it without telling me. Apparently she's back with the abusive fiance and doesn't want to talk to me. I have no reason to take that class now. I dropped it, but can only get 70% refund. If she had told me by 8/22...I coulda gotten a full refund.
I don't know what to say other than I'm sorry, Lookout - that truly sucks.
And MTP - was she *really* a friend???
MTP - Sounds like she and he are very immature.
I don't know what to say other than I'm sorry, Lookout - that truly sucks.
And MTP - was she *really* a friend???
I thought she was, we'd been friends for about 2yrs now. She's the only close female friend I'd had in awhile. Guess I'm back down to just my sis and SIL again.
Well she certainly doesn't sound mature enough to be able to handle these current conflicts gracefully, but 20 year olds are still learning a lot about life. Send her a message that you are still there for her and give her some time to process it.
Well she certainly doesn't sound mature enough to be able to handle these current conflicts gracefully, but 20 year olds are still learning a lot about life. Send her a message that you are still there for her, but she owes you the 30% and give her some time (net 30) to pay it.
MTP- Abuse messes with people's brains. I am sorry she dropped the class. Take it anyway. For you, its enrichment... for her... it will be someone who stuck to thier guns. I dis-agree with Squirel... do not expect any money.. if she is with him, he may well have control of her $$$$ as well as her emotions. If she is being abused... all I can say is stick to who you are, but do NOT coddle her. I was abused, I was an emotional basket case, and easily manipulated. Stick to who you are, this will help her decide if she is *ready* to be herself.. or if she needs to still be with him. Trying to defend him will only make her stay longer (or at least it did for me).
I am sorry you have to deal with this.. it sucks. I am sure it sucks for her too.. give her time. The fact that people chastised her, most likely made her sink as far into hiding as she could.
I disagree with Jaydaan's not getting my attempt at being facetious.
I'm trying to take the high-road. Not so much to rub it in her face, but so that I don't disappoint myself. To me though, the close-friendship is over. If she changes her mind and wants to hang out again, I might do so. I don't think I'll be able to confide in her again. I'm feeling less angry about, moved onto numbness.
I had to drop the class, I wasn't all that excited about it anyway. Just sitting there knowing how she'd treated me about it made me too angry. I just couldn't handle it. She'll never know anyway.
My nephew never went to pre-k and his parents never take him anywhere. Monday was his first day in school and he hasn't been happy since. Every morning he would say he doesn't like school and he doesn't want to go to school and would beg to stay home. I get him ready every morning because his mom goes to work at 5:30AM. When at home, if anyone say anything to him about school, he would become quiet and solemn. It shows clearly in his face. It's heart wrenching for me to see how unhappy he is. And today, I found out his mom told someone that he doesn't like school because he's used to being doted on and because no one pays attention to him at school. WHAT THE HELL IS SHE TALKING ABOUT???!!!?? She doesn't know what's going on at school. She hasn't spoken to the teacher. I had asked her to email the teacher, and she won't do it. He's a happy child and for him not to be happy, there is something going on. How can a mother say such thing about her child??!!?? And yes, I know him very well because I've taken care of him since the day he came home from the hospital, and I took care of him from 5:30AM to 4:30PM until Monday when it was the first day of school. Now, I wake him up, get him ready for school, I pack his lunch, and take care of him after school until his mom picks him up at 4:30PM. Do I have the right I claim I know him well and be upset at him mom? HELL YES!! :mad2:
Sorry Tulip, that really sucks. :( Any chance you can email the teacher yourself? If you are his after-school guardian, you have a right to communicate with her about his transition from school to after-school care. Whether Mom will be okay with it is a different story, but at least you can get a word in with the teacher...
I AM going to email the teacher. I actually went with him and his parents on the first day and school, and I also spoke to his teacher. I'm hoping his teacher will remember me and be willing to communicate with me about him. I had asked my sister-in-law to email the teacher and tell her that they give me the permission to know about his education, but she won't do it. She said she doesn't think it'll be a problem and that I can just go ahead and email the teacher. She is so damn lazy! And my brother never liked school so it doesn't bother him when my nephew says he doesn't like school. WTF!!!!! GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :mad2::mad2::mad2:
I'm reading a US teacher training manual right now (long story) and I think the teacher cannot share info with you without very clear written permission from the parents. The teacher has to cover themself legally.
I suggest you contact the teacher and find out exactly what kind of permission is needed, so you can get it. Then you can talk.
Also, the teacher might be a bit defensive - sad child is a reflection of an unwelcoming classroom, which doesn't look good for the teacher. The teacher might try to direct attention on the child's home life. From what is written here, the teacher might have a point.
Unless the teacher is overly paranoid, she's not going to get all legalistic on Tulip's ass unless Tulip let it slip that the mom didn't want Tulip communicating with the teacher (which apparently isn't the case anyway, the mom seems to be cool with it.) If she's already met the teacher in person, I suspect the teacher will remember her and be willing to talk to her as a guardian.
Whether the teacher gets defensive depends entirely on how the problem is presented. As long as it's described as the boy "having trouble adjusting" and not "my nephew hates your class, you must be a sucky teacher," I expect the teacher will be thrilled to help in any way she can. All the teachers in my family complain most about the parents who never communicate, not the ones who are overly involved.
Its possible he might need a little bit of special attention from the teacher in order to feel more comfortable in the class. The teacher may very well be amendable to that. Its worth a try.
The smarter the dog the less likely they will be disturbed by crate training. They see it as their sanctuary like a teenager has their " own room". What is cruel are the dogs people throw away because they cannot get them housebroken and they think that crate training is cruel.
Most of my dogs do not have doors on their crate unless I am leaving for hours. They will go outside, come in and choose to be in their "room".
Crates are necessary for intact dogs or you will be over run with puppies. To make this pertinent to the thread, Victor's mother is in heat and I am in hell. Counting the days til she can be spayed! :thepain:
My daughter is on a competition all-star cheer squad. It's pretty expensive--will end up costing us about $2K over the season for various fees, uniform, etc. not to mention travel to competitions.
Now, I don't really mind if she enjoys it. I like the little weekend trips, and it's a great way for her to stay physically fit.
Trouble is, she hurt her knee a couple weeks ago and decided, also because she's way freaked out about 9th grade and having enough time for school plus JROTC and clubs and etc. she wanted to quit.
I told her she could quit. No problemo.
Then the team mom informed me that I'd signed a contract (actually hubby signed it) saying I'd pay the full amount even if she quit.
Yikes! I'd end up owing about $1100 for NOTHING.
So I made her stay. Tried to encourage her, saying how she made a commitment, it'd be good in the long run, but now it's all led to a really sour feeling. Everyone knows she was planning to quit. See how that is?
And that's what upsets me today. :(
Aren't you worried she'll do permanent damage to the knee?
Yes. I took her to the doctor last week and got it x-rayed; he said she'd be fine, she should do as much or as little as she thought she ought to, that it wasn't a serious injury, just a sprain of some kind.
I'm not entirely convinced because I'm not happy with the doc but he was handy.
You know, it's not so much that THIS particular injury concerns me. She's 14, she'll heal. My worry is that these juvenile sports injuries have a way of compounding and bothering you for the rest of your life. She's been very lucky all the while she's been involved in gymnastics and cheer, which she started at the age of *five.* She competed in gymnastics, she's done competition cheer for three years now, she's really buff! But has had no major injuries till now.
And I guess I wouldn't call this a *major* injury, but it's the worst yet and sort of a sign that maybe she's not as young or well-conditioned as she used to be. Seems like in the past the various teams she was on were emphatic about good physical conditioning, muscle strength exercises to prevent injury. The ones she does now (this all-star team plus her school sidelines squads) don't put as much time into conditioning, they just want the practices that'll get them wins. Skills are great, but you've got to have the conditioning to back them up, or this is what happens. Injuries. I've seen it happen again and again, especially in gymnastics when a kid progressed too quickly through levels.
She's been wearing a knee brace to practices, not so much because she needs it, but because it reminds the coaches that she's recently injured and needs to take it easy. They're real boneheads sometimes.
Oh, and she also gets scrapes and gouges on her hands and arms, bruises on her shoulders from stunting. Imagine having a kid only slightly smaller (and not even smaller, necessarily, just a tad more limber with better balance) towering above you, trying to balance on your and three other teammates hands/arms, sneakers kicking, limbs flailing. It's amazing nobody's broken a collarbone. (knock on wood) Or a nose. Wait, last year someone did get her nose broken. My dear daughter is a BASE.
She's a beautiful girl, about one inch taller than me (that'd make her 5'3"), with my build (broad shoulders, kind of curvy) and weighs a good 30 lbs. more than I did at her age. Don't get me wrong - it's all muscle (which weighs more than fat, I'm told) whereas I was really scrawny at 14; she's not fat at all. But 125 lbs. is a lot of mass to throw into a back handspring without good muscle tone to back it up and hold joints in their proper place.
I think it may be time for some sports therapy and strength training on her own time. I'll join her, because I could use some toning up too. Ha, understatement. :)
My worry is that these juvenile sports injuries have a way of compounding and bothering you for the rest of your life.
Yeah, that was my concern. When a kid has been competitive, and enjoyed it, wants to back off, they could be listening to their body. Or maybe she's just becoming interested in different pursuits. I'm just thinking out loud here, you know her, and her world, best, and I'm sure you have her best interest at heart. Go Mom.:)
Unless the teacher is overly paranoid, she's not going to get all legalistic on Tulip's ass unless Tulip let it slip that the mom didn't want Tulip communicating with the teacher (which apparently isn't the case anyway, the mom seems to be cool with it.) If she's already met the teacher in person, I suspect the teacher will remember her and be willing to talk to her as a guardian.
Whether the teacher gets defensive depends entirely on how the problem is presented. As long as it's described as the boy "having trouble adjusting" and not "my nephew hates your class, you must be a sucky teacher," I expect the teacher will be thrilled to help in any way she can. All the teachers in my family complain most about the parents who never communicate, not the ones who are overly involved.
Unfortunately, the law says the teacher cannot discuss the student with anyone but the parent without written permission.
FERPA
Sure, a casual conversation could take place, but one must tiptoe very carefully around privacy laws.
FERPA
That's a funny word. FERPA. FEEEEEERRRRRRRR-PA. FERPA.
[COLOR="White"]I know it's an acronym[/COLOR]
Tulip, there's probably nothing wrong if she just recieves information. E-mail her with the information that you think she needs to improve your nephew's experience. I don't think she would be breaking the law if she asked questions, and recieved your answers. She just won't be able to give you anything.
Tulip, definitely squeeze Mom for that permission. I've had relatives try to pump me for information only to find out that they're in the middle of a feud with the parents. The classroom teacher will probably be less strict about privacy than we are because we are special ed and have strict rules for good reasons.
I really like home/school notebooks for communication. You could ask if the teacher is willing to write a couple sentences about what they're doing in class so that you can frame the activities in a positive way for him and find out who his friends are or who might be bothering him.
My favorite strategy with my own girls was to always ask them "What was the best thing that happened at school today?" I didn't let them off the hook if the said "Nothing." I'd probe until something good, no matter how small, was revealed. Then I'd use that information later to describe what they should be looking forward to. Always be aware that the last thing that happens at school or on the bus will color their impression of the day so you need to get the child to reflect more deeply.
Yes, Griff, what you said in your first paragraph. That is why it's slippery: one never knows what might be really going on in any given family. Unfortunately, as with just about anything, the ne'er-do-wells have mucked it up for people who just want to help.
Written permission? Done deal. No legal problems for anyone, regardless.
Meh. I've had teachers who did have every legal right to speak to Mr. Clod refuse to do so on the sole basis that he and their mother weren't married, thus it must be a given that they were working at cross purposes. It's never truly about the legalities, it's about whether the teacher feels they'll get called on the legalities.
Well, that's just silly, that was her call, not the law call.
As far as the law though, it is truly about the legalities. For me, mom can scream and moan all she wants at me, I'm not risking my job because she doesn't want to be bothered with a simple piece of paperwork. Legally, the privacy laws are for a reason (custody disputes and the like come to mind as reason the laws came into being in the first place) and personally, I feel ethically responsible to afford the privacy to the parent or student in question whether they feel it's a "meh" or not.
Oh absolutely, a person should follow the legalities if they don't want to get in trouble, and I don't begrudge them that. I'm just saying, in my experience, if Tulip plays her cards right she doesn't need to worry about getting her paperwork ducks in a row before talking to the teacher. You work with a totally different clientele than the average elementary school.
This is true, and the hard part: one size does not fit all, so some might be skittish about even skirting around the edge. I suppose my point is don't be too hard on the teacher or the system if they won't talk to you, Tulip...just try to get the documentation if you really think you can help. :)
Dear lookout123
There's no "e" in Dad. Don't put one there. Take care of yourself so you can take care of your family.
I'm here for you friend.
That's a funny word. FERPA. FEEEEEERRRRRRRR-PA. FERPA.
It reminds me of Bill Cosby's ark routine:
You see Noah was in his rec. room
Sewing away, he was making a few things for the home there.
He was a good carpenter
Ferpa, ferpa, ferpa. (Bill Cosby imitating the sound of sawing wood)
My daughter is on a competition all-star cheer squad. It's pretty expensive--will end up costing us about $2K over the season for various fees, uniform, etc. not to mention travel to competitions.
...
Then the team mom informed me that I'd signed a contract (actually hubby signed it) saying I'd pay the full amount even if she quit.
Yikes! I'd end up owing about $1100 for NOTHING.
There was a Penn & Teller: Bullshit episode on the cheerleading scam. It was a while ago, so I don't remember details, but all that sounds familiar.
There are a lot of travel teams that operate like that now, certainly hockey and soccer.
Well, it does look like we've got a contract. So, I guess we're stuck.
She went back. They've been letting her take it easy in practice, so, so far so good.
My main gripe right now is that nationals are in Destin. I don't want to go all the way to FL for a cheer comp. Yeah, I knew that when I signed her up, so more's the pity. :)
Yesterday I spoke with a doctor who flat out told me that depression and/bipolar diagnoses in children Lil Lookout's age are flat out idiotic as those conditions are just thrown about to make parents feel better about their lack of parenting skills. I won't be going back.
This morning Lil Lookout handed me a suicide note and asked me how to just "make it all stop".
Oh man. Is this a doctor you've seen before?
:mad2: :mad2: :mad2: Please note the doctor and practice's name here for Google bait. Please. In fact, that statement is just short of calling for a
Medical Board complaint, IMO.
That sucks lookout! :mad:
Your local hospital should have a crisis intervention area for emergency psychiatric situations. The hospital can, or should be able to refer you to places in the community where you can get help.
Some towns have medical intervention ( day )clinics where kids can be placed and observed and properly diagnosed by a pediatric/ adolescent psychiatrist. It is kind of like a school. They do daily normal activities and trained professionals watch and interact professionally with the children every step of the way.
Untreated anxiety in children will develop into depression of course. They know something isn't right, and when they call out for help in the form of a suicide note the best thing to do is go to the emergency for psychiatric help.
...and get a childhood psychiatrist. Not a psychologist. I find they are crap.
What I find reassuring is that he seems smart enough to ask for help. I know it is distressing to get pleas for help via suicide threats from your child but at least he is verbalizing and that is a great thing.imo They don't know what to do to help themselves so it is up to us to make the professionals life's uncomfortable until they do.
Second guessing medical diagnosis rather than just going to the doctor because of the expense :greenface
I saw a snippet about Rwanda the other day, they are having their first democratic election, also they have established a public health care system, sound like a spiffing idea :mad:
Them goddam Rwandans, if they want health care they should get their own damn health care, I got mine. Rwandans always wanting a hand-out.
(I agree with you Beest. It's the suxxors. I see it happening to my friends often.)
I'm so sorry, Lookout. That's got to hurt something awful. :(
Aw shit. That sucks. I hope he gets the help he needs.
lookout, what is it he wants to stop?
I can't imagine how awful this is for all of you. I wish I could help.
This morning Lil Lookout handed me a suicide note and asked me how to just "make it all stop".
I'm so sorry man. We have a shortage of qualified mental health pros for kids around here. I hope you have better luck finding someone.
Damn Lookout - thats rough.
Lookout, as you offered to beat the shit out of my doctor, I feel it is only fair to offer the same service to you. I'm so sorry things are rotten right now.
Is it the meds causing the suicidal thoughts? Or are they helping?
My mind goes immediately to an Outward Bound or Last Child in the Woods type camp situation, but he's too young (I assume). What else is there? What are your thoughts about what he needs?
lookout123,
Please check your pm.
hoping for the best for you and your son, Lookout.
I should have done a better job of composing my initial post. The dr was not someone we deal with regularly. He is the new guy at our ped's office and i was there on an unrelated matter. His statement was off the cuff and he realized almost immediately he had stepped on his dick. I gave him a summary of our experiences and suggested he do some more reading and open his mind because not everybody is just shopping for a guilt relief diagnosis. I then spoke to the Dr who owns the practice (I've known and respected him for years) about coaching the new guy to develop more tact. I'm not going to fuck up his career by lodging a complaint because I believe he will learn to think before he speaks.
Thanks for the support and suggestions. The issue at hand is not new, just more severe than it has been for some time. We have a regular psychologist who works with LL to develop non-drug coping mechanisms. We have an excellent child psychiatrist who we will be going back to see as soon as possible.
LL is bipolar. About a year ago we finally found a drug that effectively knocks off the abnormal bottom range (depression) of his emotional roller coaster. Normally once that side of things is nailed down a second drug is introduced to deal with the high side (manic) of things. We have held off on that because we obviously don't want to overmedicate a 9 year old and he had been doing very well since february or march. Unfortunately the drugs that deal with the manic issues are nasty little bastards and we've tried to avoid them. Obviously it is time to revisit that decision.
I am sorry, LO. I hope for your family's and your son's sakes you guys are able to come up with a happy solution for the little guy. Your son is the same age as mine and often reminds me of mine, when you post about him. My heart goes out to you and yours.
I'm not going to fuck up his career by lodging a complaint because I believe he will learn to think before he speaks.
But all that accomplishes is concealing what he really thinks/feels. That could be even more harmful to his patients.
Fortunately your smart enough to disregard his "wisdom".
I trust that between my narrative and the very senior ped he is working under he will at least open his mind a little bit. Also, he is a ped not a psych man so...
Cool, I trust your judgment.:thumb:
The non drug coping mechanisms are a great way to go.
From what I have read, bipolar is very rough though. I wish you the best of luck finding the right rx's to bring your son some relief.
B*I*G row with Mum last night.
Yes, I triggered it.
She coughs when she eats bread products.
No diagnosis, no medical issue - but she does. Cough I mean.
And she has an annoying cough.
I'm sensitive to noise.
Have been since I was a child.
I caused so many arguments at the dinner table because of my brother's eating habits (slapping his chops et al) that Mum told me I was going to be put in a home (ie turned over to Social Services)
So I admit I was probably flinching and grimacing every time Mum coughed
And yes, I did turn up the TV when Winslow came on. It's a local village, and one where I spent a lot of time aged 14-16. "Local" news is usually Reading or Bournemouth, over 100 miles away rather then 7.
She picked up her meal and went to eat it in the living room. Telling my Dad and I exactly why. Pointing out also that it was her bloody house and she paid half of the bloody bills and what did I contribute?
We carried on, but after dinner she came back in to say no-one ever defended her. Dad said nothing to dened her but he always slagged me off behind me back, he didn't want me here, why wasn't he honest about it.... Again, that it was her own house and she could do as she wanted and what right did I have to react like that. Etc, etc
I shouted back.
I did.
I admit it.
I went upstairs to cry. Dad did the washing and drying up. She stormed out.
Haven't seen her since, but apparently she is out with Maureen today, and her teacup was in the sink, so she must have come home last night.
This has been brewing a while.
I copped it.
Really - I hold my hands up about my reaction. But d'ya know what? Had she diffused it by saying, "I can't help coughing!" I'd have smiled and apologised. No, she had to make a scene. She's raised this whole "my house" thing before. When she threatened to smash Dad's face in because he admitted not knowing whether to follow my directions rather than hers.
She's a bloody scary woman.
I suppose I love her.
I certainly want her approval.
But there is a small part of me that wants to bring her down to earth and tell her exactly how things are.
All her friends and accquaintances adore her. Anyone I meet who knows her tells me what a lovely woman she is. How caring. How loving. What a great example of a Christian.
They don'e see the screaming, the threats, the bullying and how we're all terrified of her temper.
Sorry.
I needed to offload.
She left the house at 10.00 this morning.
She's not back yet. Meaning she's missed lunch and dinner and that's pretty important in this house.
Grandad called and asked for her. Dad said he thought she was with Maureen.
She called Dad back - FURIOUS - to say she wasn't, and that Dad would have to "deal with him" (leak under his sink apparently).
Poor old Dad. He loves her.
Me? I'm glad she's out of the way if she's still in such a pissy mood.
Maybe she'll be hit by a car and I'll have the nice-or-nasty eulogy situation for real.
Old witch.
Time for you to leave. Could you lodge with your grandad? Board in exchange for household help?
I agree with monnie, she sounds abusive. I would try to find something else if I were in that situation.
Just heard that a friend's 22 y.o. son was killed in Afghanistan today.
Fuck oil.
war is retarded. fights in general are retarded. why cant we just be.
Getting pretty hard to find someone that doesn't know of a fatality in Iraq/Afghanistan, related to their social/professional circle. I know several, and it sucks.:(
At Mum & Dad's church they regularly pray for the soldiers.
And not just from Christian goodwill - there are at least three familes with sons serving overseas that I know of, and possibly more.
No fatalities among the congregration but the fear is always there, and the worry that it's only a matter of time.
Mum & I still haven't made up.
We're just avoiding eachother.
Still, stalemate is better than outright confrontation, which always makes me feel sick.
Mum & I still haven't made up.
We're just avoiding eachother.
Still, stalemate is better than outright confrontation, which always makes me feel sick.
Maybe let it go for a while, send a card tomorrow for her FC day and the need to discuss the incident might slowly disappear if there are other more pressing things at hand. i.e. not to say that there is anything identical in your situation, but tree falling on my house means that I have something logistical to discuss with my folks so we don't need to discuss anything sensitive. They feel useful because they can offer advice and I feel as if I'm fulfilling my daughterly duties, so win, win.
Casi, that's exactly how I plan to approach it.
The way things are at present:
I said I wouldn't eat another meal with her again, and I am sticking to it.
As it was her initial request, I'm waiting for her to ask me down to lunch or dinner.
It is VERY childish, I am aware of that.
However she did make a Sunday roast yesterday, plated some up for me and left it in the fridge with a note saying I was welcome to it and to bin it otherwise. She called to me before I read it, saying the same thing and I said "Thank you very much" as was appropriate. I had it for lunch today.
On the other hand, she shouted up to me that "my" washing had finished. Despite the fact I'd removed "her" washing from the machine and pegged it out. We don't differentiate in this house. We both look after Dad and Grandad these days - I simply start and stop and peg out and tumble dry and iron (in the last 4 months anyway) as necessary. She does more than me - I admit. But she has less to do than she did before I moved in. This was like being back in a student house. But then I say that - I had two ironed tops on my door this afternoon. I just think we're both being careful.
We're slowly reaching rapprochement. I got two growing-up-in-London based autobiographies from the library today and offered them to her. They might be rubbish, but it was half an olive, if not a whole branch.
We'll get by.
It's our worst falling out I can remember. Over something so silly. But the problem is both of us believe we were right, even after the tide of temper went out.
And of course I've hammered another nail in the coffin of my relationship with my sister.
Oh well, I was a fool to think that would ever be revived as anything other than a shambling zombie anyway.
Some of my most hurtful disagreements have been with my mother. It just is, what can you say. However, we both know that no matter how bad they might get, no matter what, we will always have each others back.
Took Pico in for a teeth cleaning and at least one tooth extraction this morning and he ends up needing [COLOR="Red"]7 TEETH[/COLOR] pulled. :thepain:
Whats worse is the price tag...[COLOR="Red"]$700[/COLOR]!!!!!!! :eek:
omfg
You're going to have to wait up, and mug the tooth fairy. :haha:
Do you want to borrow my pliers?
[YOUTUBE]2_XEmZAxovg&start=59s[/YOUTUBE]
Do you want to borrow my pliers?
Damn, if only.
My eczema is bad. :( It always seems to get worse this time of year, presumably some seasonal allergen. It will get better, but right now my hands are sore, raw and weepy and it's driving me nuts.
I'm in the process of a divorce. However, I will say nothing further about that until the matter is settled.
While at work on Wednesday, I thought I was having a low blood sugar attack...I collapsed while using the bathroom, breaking my right leg and twisting my left leg. Apparently, I was not suffering from low blood sugar, but severe dehydration brought on by a stomach virus...I had no clue.
Today I just started feeling like myself again...I might actually eat a meal tonight. My boss was able to procure a wheelchair for me from work (we deliver pharmaceuticals and homecare supplies at our KC office), so I can get around work and my hotel. And people from the office have been bringing me to and from work.
But I'm 250 miles from home. For the first time really in my adult life, I am on my own...and I am okay with that. But it is scary as fuck! I am basically relying on the kindness of strangers to help me out here in Kansas City. My bosses have been thrilled with the work I'm doing out here, so they're okay with me staying. Of course, if I had to go home, I'd be fucked...because I'd probably have to go back out on the road, and I probably won't be able to drive properly again for 2-4 weeks.
I'm in a helluva lot of pain, and I still can't walk on my foot, even though I'm in a walking cast. I'm too heavy for crutches, and a wheelchair is no fun to push with low upper body strength. I have nothing but respect for people in wheelchairs...not that I didn't before, but I've only been in one for 3 days and I'm about ready to stab my eyes out.
And what sucks the most is having to rely on others to help you. I don't mind asking for help, but when it's for simple shit that you normally do yourself, it feels almost soul-destroying. Not to mention, you're on someone else's schedule, which generally drives me nuts.
Thank you for your time.
jaw drops at Sycamore. That's awful!
Divorce is one of the most stressful (but imo, rewarding!) things. But take better care of yourself!
No Dwellars nearby that could lend a hand?
Well, Elspode is actually nearby...we keep meaning to hang out.
if ever a time you needed to call up a friend . . .
I'm in the process of a divorce. However, I will say nothing further about that until the matter is settled.
While at work on Wednesday, I thought I was having a low blood sugar attack...I collapsed while using the bathroom, breaking my right leg and twisting my left leg. Apparently, I was not suffering from low blood sugar, but severe dehydration brought on by a stomach virus...I had no clue.
Today I just started feeling like myself again...I might actually eat a meal tonight. My boss was able to procure a wheelchair for me from work (we deliver pharmaceuticals and homecare supplies at our KC office), so I can get around work and my hotel. And people from the office have been bringing me to and from work.
But I'm 250 miles from home. For the first time really in my adult life, I am on my own...and I am okay with that. But it is scary as fuck! I am basically relying on the kindness of strangers to help me out here in Kansas City. My bosses have been thrilled with the work I'm doing out here, so they're okay with me staying. Of course, if I had to go home, I'd be fucked...because I'd probably have to go back out on the road, and I probably won't be able to drive properly again for 2-4 weeks.
I'm in a helluva lot of pain, and I still can't walk on my foot, even though I'm in a walking cast. I'm too heavy for crutches, and a wheelchair is no fun to push with low upper body strength. I have nothing but respect for people in wheelchairs...not that I didn't before, but I've only been in one for 3 days and I'm about ready to stab my eyes out.
And what sucks the most is having to rely on others to help you. I don't mind asking for help, but when it's for simple shit that you normally do yourself, it feels almost soul-destroying. Not to mention, you're on someone else's schedule, which generally drives me nuts.
Thank you for your time.
Ah brother, bad times, sorry to hear it. :sniff:
Bummer - seems to be going around a lot lately.
Wow! How humiliating to break your leg while peeing! That sucks syc, hope your good luck turns out for the better and you meet a nice hawt nurse (or doctor) to make up for the divorce.
MTP, it might have been #2. Just sayin'.
That Sucks Syc
May I reMIND you Folks ELVIS The KING Died on the thrown !!!
So Breakeing yer leg in the Crapper is Not that Bad !!!
Rock ON SYC !!!!
sorry to hear your bad news, Sycamore. Good luck. You've already broken a leg.
An old friend, now living in Florida, is getting a triple bypass today.
I hope all goes well for him/her. A friend of my fathers had a triple done a few years ago and the ole codger is now out and about goin fishin and all. Turned out really well for him.
Oh, crap, Syc. I'd wondered why I hadn't heard from you in a while.
Blessings, love, and luck to you, buddy.
Almost $300 doctor visit for sinus infection and I still have to go get the meds. Well that brings my deductible down to only $3400.
Holy shit! That sux.:mad:
The outside of my left nostril is swollen from a small zit. I had a hell of a time popping it with my fingers so I scraped it off with a little screwdriver.
next time try holding a hot compress on it for a while before going to bed. usually ready to pop the next morning (ew). Or just treat it with witch hazel and tea tree oil, much better.
Holy shit! That sux.:mad:
Yeah I know, $3750 deductible...what the fuck? I'm on my parent's plan and its $200/mo. I looked at plans today, a decent one is $244/mo...$50 extra than the quote because they're going to charge me extra for actually using the damn insurance I buy. Not to mention the $30 non-refundable application fee...what the fuck? Then they can still deny me based on pre-existing conditions or deny me coverage on that condition. Fuck private for profit insurance.
Then they can still deny me based on pre-existing conditions or deny me coverage on that condition.
If this actually happens, get it to happen two more times, and then you can present your three denial papers and get onto the new federal program (just kicked in as of July 1st.) I know several families who have done this and they say they are pleased with the cost vs. coverage, though I haven't heard specific numbers from them.
Upstairs toilet line blocked...
1st plumber says broken line underground, but he doesn't know exactly where.
$342 for that tidbit of information
2nd plumber with in-line camera says it's 3 ft down, 2 ft out from house and under the buried TV cable.
He says it will be 2 men @ $95/hr + $75 for truck+camera... OR,
"Just dig down following pipe from the "clean out" and you'll find where the soil lines comes together... then call us"
$238 for that tidbit.
I'm now 4+ hrs into digging, 2 cups of coffee, and a Motrin.
No bodies or treasure yet... will attack the beast again tomorrow.
Judging from the looks of it, you'll want to replace that entire line from where it leaves the house to the septic or sewer. Get a backhoe, replace it once for the rest of your life. Those fees seemed high for just a visit, would they be offset if you hired them to do the job? Are you in the hinterlands, or do you reek of money?
The town reeks of money... not us, for sure !
next time try holding a hot compress on it for a while before going to bed. usually ready to pop the next morning (ew). Or just treat it with witch hazel and tea tree oil, much better.
I will give that a try next time. Thank you. :)
Or you can use a soldering iron.
Just found out my Auntie Stella has cancer. Kidneys, bowels, stomach, liver.
as a kid I used to jokingly call Stell my 'Other Mother'. When Mum and Dad divorced, me and Mum lived with Stell for several months.
One of my earliest and fondest memories is of the eve of my 5th Birthday, when Stell visited and had a big roll of Polo mints (at the time the only sweet I was allowed to eat). She let me eat all the polos.
I haven't seen much of her the last few years. She married a guy about 5 years ago who seemed to change her. She stopped being so close with her kids, her sisters and us nieces and nephews. Just the last 12 months she has started to come back out of herself and get involved in family stuff.
Mum and i were only talking the other day about how Stell seems like herself again. And how they'd arranged to have more regular visits with each other and their older sister Jaqui.
This is going to hit Mum so hard.
Fuck cancer.
Oh, that sucks. I'm sorry Dana. :(
Thanks guys.
It's the effect on Ma that worries me most. Obviously, the thought of Stell goiing through this is horrible, but it's how it will impact on Ma that I'm most concerned about. She and Stell are only 18 months apart in age; the youngest two of a big family, they were almost like twins as kids.
Then there's the fact that their older sister Jaqui has been diagnosed with cOPD (the thing that killed my Dad). 'The Three Sisters' they've always been known as. There's a painting of three mountain peaks by that name, and all three of them take it as a kind of emblem.
*sighs*
God I hate this. This age when the 'grown-ups' start falling away and us 'kids' have to accept their, and our, mortality :P
All you can do is love 'em when they need it most, and honor 'em by being your best... fuck cancer. :sniff:
So sorry to hear this, Dana. Fuck cancer. Just fuck it.
That sucks dani. Fuck cancer and COPD.
Thanks guys.
I mentioned in another thread that we have a prognosis now. The consultant says with no treatment she has maybe 9 months. With treatment, he hopes they can double that.
Her son and eldest daughter are both living in NZ at the moment. I believe they're both flying out today for an extended visit.
Here's a thing: turns out she went to her GP three or four times over this. Having had a really bad back for a while, she had an op about two months ago. She felt tons better after that, and was pretty upbeat. Then, within a week she started feeling shit agan, lots of new symptoms etc. Coming straight off the back of other health problems (first a heart problem, then her back) being ill and in pain again made her quite despressed.
So...off she goes to her Doc, who says there's nothing to worry about, probably she's just feeling run down after her op. Goes back a second time, the Doc insists there's nothing wrong; asks her if she's maybe depressed? Stell says yes she is, but because she's feeling so ill.
A third visit, and this time the Doctor tells her, it's in her head, she's depressed and that she had seen and heard "not one single thing to raise her concerns." She said all this in a dismissive, angry manner. She treated Stell like she was a hypochondriac. She offered to arrange her some counseling.
A fourth visit and Stella insisted that there was something amiss; and that she wanted it investigating NOW.
We have friends and family who work in the health service, and Stell's ex son-in-law is a doctor at the hospital where she now is. He got hold of her medical records and says that at the time her GP was telling her it was in her head, and that there was 'not one single thing' to flag concern; there were in fact FIVE things in her records that should have raised concern. Any single one of which warranted immediate investigation.
The primary tumor is an extremely aggressive form of cancer, but it is also one that can usually be successfully treated if caught early enough. The GP held her off for almost 6 weeks. Which we believe is roughly how long it has taken to go from a very early and treatable tumour, to the death sentence she now has.
Stella will be the third of Mum's siblings and the fifth family member, to be killed by medical negligence or malpractice.
I'm so sorry Dana. I fucking hate doctors so very much. Your family has my deepest condolences.
Kick that doctor in the taco, Paco.
What a crap.
Grrrrrrrrr - so sorry Dana. This scares me so much. I've heard too many stories of people who go to their doctor only to be told there is nothing wrong with them whereby later to be proven the patient was right.... only the admission came too late.
I just came home from KC for good yesterday. My dad is in his final days.
He has never fully recovered from his lung cancer surgery in July, and he now has pneumonia in his good lung. He's so weak from all the other battles that this is it. It could be days, it could be hours.
My mom is holding her own...she's a remarkably strong woman, and has held up pretty well during all this. My brother is not handling it well and is an even bigger shithead than he normally is. Add to this, we had to inform my stepsisters, who are not really part of the family because they are fucking idiots in general.
Guess who gets to lead the brigade?
Did I mention that my mom's oldest sister--who is like a second mom to me--is now suffering from advanced dementia and may have terminal bladder cancer?
And I'm finally filing for divorce early next week. Our wedding anniversary was Wednesday...that was a great fucking day!
When it rains, it pours. But the skies will eventually clear.
*Hugs Sycamore*
One foot in front of the other m'dear. It's the only way.
Oh and fuck cancer, good and proper.
Jeez sycamore, you can't seem to catch a break. 2010 is going to go down as the year from hell for you.
You'll get through this. Just keep the good attitude.
:comfort:
Hang in there, syc. What a horrible time for you. :(
So sorry. Hang in there. Hugs to mom.
Sorry man that does suck.
Hang tough Syc !!
And dana I agree with Footz , Kick Paco in the taco !!!!!
Med Board review ??
Sue for malpractice or Professional incompetency ??
Or Have Uncle Vito go have a Little TALk with said Dr!!
*nods*
Not sure quite what's going to happen on that score.
I know when Uncle Dave died there was talk of taking legal action, but Auntie Joan and the kids didn't want to get imbroiled in something that could potentially drag on and be very upsetting.
Not helped by the fact that the last time we took issue with the NHS it was a nightmare. Mum was in her final year of Nurse training and was told by a ward sister to lift a heavily disabled patient alone: totally did her back in, destroyed her career (six months in traction and permanent damage) and left her unable to work full-time for many years. Even with her union funding legal assistance, it took 13 years to get an apology and compensation. (22k for a destroyed career and 13 years of fighting) Every other year she'd have to have another medical exam, because the previous results had gone missing. The staff involved, including the ward sster were all transferred elsewhere and became difficult to locate. etc etc. Obstruction, nastiness and all round dishonesty.
So...I don't know what's going to happen this time. The problem is with stuff like this, and the reason so few people actually take action, is that it's always during a time when families are dealing with deeply emotional and traumatic events. The time when they're least able/willing to take on a difficult and distressing legal journey.
*nods*
Not sure quite what's going to happen on that score.
I know when Uncle Dave died there was talk of taking legal action, but Auntie Joan and the kids didn't want to get imbroiled in something that could potentially drag on and be very upsetting.
Not helped by the fact that the last time we took issue with the NHS it was a nightmare. Mum was in her final year of Nurse training and was told by a ward sister to lift a heavily disabled patient alone: totally did her back in, destroyed her career (six months in traction and permanent damage) and left her unable to work full-time for many years. Even with her union funding legal assistance, it took 13 years to get an apology and compensation. (22k for a destroyed career and 13 years of fighting) Every other year she'd have to have another medical exam, because the previous results had gone missing. The staff involved, including the ward sster were all transferred elsewhere and became difficult to locate. etc etc. Obstruction, nastiness and all round dishonesty.
So...I don't know what's going to happen this time. The problem is with stuff like this, and the reason so few people actually take action, is that it's always during a time when families are dealing with deeply emotional and traumatic events. The time when they're least able/willing to take on a difficult and distressing legal journey.
You mean your country has a problem with too LITTLE people willing to sue for malpractice? From what the right-wingers tell me, ours has way to many sue-happy lawyers.
(Sorry for the political BS, I'll stop now. Just recently my mom has been all whiny about lawyers/suing being evil and I'm losing it a little.
OK, now I'm done.)
I am really sorry that this has happened to y'all Dana.
Syc, fuck cancer. I hope the divorce doesn't get too unpleasant.
Overall, I hope things get better for you.
You broke your leg right? (Too lazy to read back to be sure.) How is that doing?
I'm sorry to hear about your Dad, Syc. Bad shit does have a way of piling up.
I hope next year is better.
Today is the one year anniversary of my Mom dying.
Second guessing medical diagnosis rather than just going to the doctor because of the expense :greenface
I am going to the doctor this time, becasue monster was worried, I probably would have 'wait and see'd myself to a burst appendix.
I am going to the doctor this time, becasue monster was worried, I probably would have 'wait and see'd myself to a burst appendix.
that's right, blame me.......... :rolleyes:
that's right, blame me.......... :rolleyes:
You say that like it's a bad thing. :headshake
nah... not a bad thing... just gets added to the account......
The Dad of one of my little people has a restraining order against him. He is a Vet suffering from PTSD and is a damn funny good guy, but isn't in control right now. It just sucks.
1) Guitarist finds wife is going totally batshit crazy (diagnosed bipolar, off meds, was 5150d 2 years ago).
2) Guitarist finally can't take it any longer and separates with intent to divorce.
3) Ex-wife uses all powers at her disposal to make life shitty for guitarist.
4) Guitarist who has no job and no money, then has his car taken by ex-wife. Now renting a room with nothing but his UI check, cannot get any level of custody of children.
5) Ex-wife now begins to make life shitty for 16 yo son and 13 yo daughter, as a way to "get back" at guitarist. She churns endlessly at the situation and creates fake dramas to take out her anger at the kids.
6) Today we're driving back from afternoon gig and guitarist gets a call from 13yo, in tears, announces that the 16yo son has attempted suicide and is in hospital and "stable".
7) As we drive steadily back, after an hour he gets another call, this time from his 19yo. Story goes: last night the 16yo asked, via txt, to have his girlfriend in the house. Ex-wife txts back no. 16yo responds with annoyance. Ex-wife txts back that he will be put in military school. 16yo txts back that he might as well kill himself. Ex-wife calls 911 and tells cops that son has threatened suicide. The cops remove him to the local hospital for evaluation. The 13yo did not know the full story because ex-wife did not tell her.
Guitarist is near the end of his rope. He says he feels like he's watching his children drowning in the ocean, and there's nothing he can do to save them.
That's why we see these amber alerts for fathers taking off with their children. Everybody wonders what's wrong with the guy, why would he do such a thing. Since the Family Courts view the fathers as simply a cash flow, he's got no chance of them listening to his worries about the welfare of the children. :mad:
Sorry to be so slow catching up on sorrows.
Dani, that scenario is all too common.
Nanny was only taken seriously when she lost the use of her arm completely.
She was immediately taken to hospital, the tumour was discovered after days of tests and she went from there to the hospice and from the hospice back home to die.
The same happened to my Mum's close friend, B. She had a lively chocolate Lab (a foolish gift for such a tiny woman) and her back and shoulder pains were blamed on walking him - to be fair he was pretty much out of control. Nope, it was galloping cancer, diagnosed too late for much help. She lasted longer than Nanny, but that was scant comfort to her family as she was much younger.
I'm so sorry about your Auntie. My love to you and yours.
And to everyone else suffering - esp the guitarist, who seems to be in a world of spiteful hurt for which he is blameless.
Auntie Stella (aka 'my other mother') died this morning, 5 weeks and two days after she was diagnosed with cancer.
I'm not distraught. She hasn't been so much a part of my day to day life in recent years. But I am saddened. Particularly for Mum and Jaqs and Uncle Ron: the three remaining siblings. And especially for Rachie, the youngest daughter (31), whose sister and brother are so far away at this time when she really needs them. And for Shirls and Ste: who are so far away when they need to be close.
I went to see her on Thursday. First time I'd seen her in about two years. Was bit shocking really.
Ach damn. What a strange thing death is.
There's loads more I want to say, and probably will at some point. Mainly about stuff that's angered or frustrated us. But having just spent two and half hours trying to decode and then grade my undergrad's 'article review' assignments, I have lost the capacity to make coherent points :P
Anyway. Please raise a glass to Auntie Stella: kind, strong, and a damn good laugh.
Sorry D. :sniff:
fuck cancer
Not a glass, just a can, but it is done. :(
Sorry, Dana. Give your mom a hug from all of us.
The little shit that's tormenting my kid at school
My best friend died four years ago yesterday. And I completely missed it. I don't know that ever did anything but sit around and talk about ppl, play video games, BBQ, and laugh our asses off. We did manage to smoke an incredible amount of pot. If laughter makes you live longer, I thought we would both live forever. But, alas...he was 36.:sniff:
Fuck pills.
Sorry - Digr - I think we've all lost someone to those damn pills.
Oxy is a really dangerous thing to mess with.
me. I assumed that was the pill you were referring to. sorry.
My best friend died four years ago yesterday...
..We did manage to smoke an incredible amount of pot.
Sorry for your loss.
My best friend was murdered in '98. Over pot and his disability money. His body was found in Thornapple river three weeks later.
Yay marijuana.
That wasn't the pot's fault. If they'd smoked it, the only thing murdered would be fritos.
That wasn't the pot's fault. If they'd smoked it, the only thing murdered would be fritos.
That's one way of looking at it.
Or you could say he was beaten near to death for his pot and the robbery was secondary (fact - from court transcripts), and he was dumped into the river and left to drown.
But yeah, pot is a victimless drug.
Lots of people are killed for cars, jewelry, cash, and hundreds of other possessions. Are the possessions to blame? That's as much of a stretch as saying it was their own fault for having possessions.
wow - I am sorry for everyones losses here - lots of sorrow around. :comfort: and :flower: to you all.
Interesting side note - John of God ("healer" in Brazil) says the Entities (spirits who possess him and heal others) hate pot - makes a persons aura all dense and red and hard to read - they say it takes about a year to clear the aura of a pot smoker. I never thought about auras and how drugs/liquor would mess with them. Some guy names Dr. Moody wrote a book about his near death experience and he had lots to say about alcoholics and the spirits that possess them when they are drinking (no pun intended) - some very interesting stuff.
I never thought about auras and how drugs/liquor would mess with them.
Possibly because the auras don't exist?
Possibly because the auras don't exist?
Nothing exists if you can't perceive it.
cf germs in the 18th C.
just a sidenote. If you're not into it - no biggie. Just an interesting thing I read.
Wasn't intended to be harsh. Just a flippant remark.
Nothing exists if you can't perceive it.
cf germs in the 18th C.
yeah...but some say they can perceive auras.
me. I assumed that was the pill you were referring to. sorry.
Don't you know that you
snort oxy? God!
makes a persons aura all dense and red and hard to read
That's why I used to get high - I don't like people reading my aura. I feel all naked when they do. ;)
yeah...but some say they can perceive auras.
can you prove that they can't?
yeah...but some say they can perceive auras.
;)
My aura is all purple-y turquois green!
What's yours??
Black and shot through with livid green:P
RFN, my aura prolly looks Xmas tree green, and smells kinda like Xmas tree, too. And hazy.
Lots of people are killed for cars, jewelry, cash, and hundreds of other possessions. Are the possessions to blame? That's as much of a stretch as saying it was their own fault for having possessions.
Yeah, I know. Someone might get mad over the way I use a period (.) and hunt me down.
You never know.
BTW: (.)(.)
Yeah, I know. Someone might get mad over the way I use a period (.) and hunt me down.
That will be me.
and when I :shotgun: you will understand why I call it a "full stop". :D
There have been (crude) tests of people who claim to see auras, based on the claim that they extend beyond the body. Put a screen that hides the body, and ask the seer to locate the auras. Seen it once on video. Total fail.
Until better evidence comes along, I don't believe in auras.
I don't believe in auras.
Forget auras...
Chilbolton FTW, eh
harsh
...but funny. :)[COLOR="White"] I was going to say the same thing but don't tell anyone.[/COLOR]
That will be me.
and when I :shotgun: you will understand why I call it a "full stop". :D
There have been (crude) tests of people who claim to see auras, based on the claim that they extend beyond the body. Put a screen that hides the body, and ask the seer to locate the auras. Seen it once on video. Total fail.
Until better evidence comes along, I don't believe in auras.
You are conflating the claim "auras exist" with "people can see auras"
Sort of like saying Vegans exist even though you can't (or barely, at any rate) see them.
I love the way vegans have become the yardstick for unprovable existence.
Wait until we get to the chapter about Vegan Auras!
Wait until we get to the chapter about Vegan Auras!
I'll bet they're all
compassionate green!The carrots wouldn't think them so compassionate.
BTW: (.)(.)
No, no, no. It's ( . v . ) or :ggw:.
:D
I'm pretty sure I'm coming down with the lurgy. I never get sick and this weekend is definitely not convenient. or alterable.
I find this video of Barbie's nude beach very upsetting.
[YOUTUBE]V8sB5SEY9XE[/YOUTUBE]
The main line from the box to my water heater has a short gahhhhhhh! :thepain:
Could you get a gahhhhhhh lengthener? ;)
Refrigerator died. FML. I've always wondered what it would be like to be those kind of people who can just go out and get new major appliances when they need to. So, what's that like?
Life really sucks in a thousand different ways.
You might be able to find a used one for cheap, Shawnee. Check out Craigs list. Put in an ad saying you're looking for one.
Yeah, I think you're right. I did a quick check on Craig's list last week, just need to find a time when my male friends can help me out (not only with transporting it but also because I don't want to show up at a stranger's house alone.)
I just need to coordinate it...maybe this next weekend.
Does anyone know why the fridge part would stop working but the freezer part would work intermittently?
If the freezer is on the top, the freezer gets the cold air first, and then the cold air spills down into the fridge. So the freezer is colder.
I've always wondered what it would be like to be those kind of people who can just go out and get new major appliances when they need to. So, what's that like?
It's Great!:p:
The freezer is on top. So does that mean that they would both be "working" but not working very well?
I wonder if "coils" or whatever need cleaned?
HELP!
The main line from the box to my water heater has a short gahhhhhhh! :thepain:
Could you get a gahhhhhhh lengthener? ;)
...
Haggis! x2
Couldn't hurt to clean the coils. You just vacuum the dust bunnies off them. They are usually underneath, but could also be on the back. They are just little radiators that look like wire racks. (To get to them if they are underneath, there should be a pull off plastic grill that you just easily pop off and then push back on)
It could also be that you have a freezer that's packed so full, it's blocking the vents that lead down into the refrigerator part. Pull frozen food away from the sides and especially rear of the freezer, and see if that helps cool the fridge part.
I'm assuming you hear the thing running. Does it run all the time? Or does it only run every once in a while? I'm also assuming you already checked that you didn't accidentally bump the thermostat and set the thing to a warmer temperature.
That's about it for things you can do yourself. Oh, and see if plugging it into a different outlet (via a heavy duty extension cord) makes it work. You could have a wiring problem and not an appliance problem.
Worst case is that the compressor motor is shot or the system has a refrigerant leak.
Hey, thanks so much. I'll try cleaning the coils. I know my freezer isn't packed full but I can't be sure there isn't something in there blocking any vents. I would not have know to look for something like that.
I did check the thermostat.
I would be so happy if I could just get it working again, even if that is short-lived, until I can look into buying a new one.
Thanks again!
Hey, thanks so much. I'll try cleaning the coils.
Careful not to shuffle them, I heard it can be bad.
my freakin' truck. going down the freeway at 70mph, cruise control on and all of a sudden it slips into neutral. or acts like it anyway. automatic transmission. i have 1st and 2nd gear. if i push the overdrive off button then it will at least stay in second gear and not slip out. wtf? any ideas? is it a bad TC or possibly a sensor?
built ford tough. my ass. last ford pickup i'll ever buy.
Final project for drama class. It was a group assignment and we had like 3 weeks to work on it. First 2 weeks, the group member who was supposed to write the script, wasn't. So last week I finally said I would. I got it done on Saturday and we filmed the thing. Then one of the other members was supposed to edit it. She had Sun, Mon, and Tues morning. I asked her repeatedly if she could and if it was OK. Even Monday night before I went to bed, I texted her one last time. She assured me it was OK. Tues morning at 9:50 I get an message from her, "Uhm, things didn't turn out so well." Class is at 10. Come to find out, she couldn't even get the video off of the camcorder to the PC.
The camcorder will play on a TV, but the miniDV we used is FUBR and won't finalize so it can be transferred to a PC. If she had told me before hand she couldn't at all get it to work, I couldv'e looked at it, figured out it was FUBR and we could've reshot the film, or filmed it off of the TV....at least had something to turn in in the class. So now, I have to fix it, edit it and turn it in on Thurs. Fortunately I talked to the prof, and I don't think she's gonna count me off for it being late since she knows that its not my fault. But its extra work I shouldn't have to be doing damnit. Oh, and since the miniDV is FUBR, and the vid can't be downloaded straight to the PC, I'm gonna have to refilm it from the TV. Its gonna look awesome...
I wonder if that's how Tarantino started out. Or was it Ed Wood? ;)
Good luck, mtp. You'll get it together.
I know, but I've gotten through the last 2 weeks by telling myself. "Ok, you'll be done on Wed after your last final which is a breeze. Just hold on until then, then you can go nuts." So at this point my sanity is hanging on by a thread, and I was supposed to be DONE by 5:30 tonight...but it turns out I'm not. :( Its very very disappointing.
I think I'm still gonna get drunk...as soon as I get done with editing.
I'm so glad the pubes, I mean 'pubs, are back in town.
Thanks for nuttin', Kasich. Blowhard. :mad:
"WE gots other stuff we want to spend money on, he said (read: we wanted the money to go into our buddy's pockets.) We can't afford it, he said (read: we don't want to create jobs on the line itself, or in manufacturing of the line, or servicing the line, or in selling popcorn to people riding the line, or ways people could possibly commute to another city for a job.) Can we keep the money anyway, he said?"
NO, dumbass, you can't keep the money. Here you go, California. And here's some for you Florida. You can have it. Fuck a bunch of Ohio: maybe we can get everyone to leave the god-forsaken state.
Dick fucking fucking dick asshole. :mad2:
http://politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com/2010/12/09/feds-pull-high-speed-rail-funds-from-wisconsin-ohio/?hpt=SbinI'm so glad the pubes, I mean 'pubs, are back in town.
Thanks for nuttin', Kasich. Blowhard. :mad:
"WE gots other stuff we want to spend money on, he said (read: we wanted the money to go into our buddy's pockets.) We can't afford it, he said (read: we don't want to create jobs on the line itself, or in manufacturing of the line, or servicing the line, or in selling popcorn to people riding the line, or ways people could possibly commute to another city for a job.) Can we keep the money anyway, he said?"
NO, dumbass, you can't keep the money. Here you go, California. And here's some for you Florida. You can have it. Fuck a bunch of Ohio: maybe we can get everyone to leave the god-forsaken state.
Dick fucking fucking dick asshole. :mad2:
http://politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com/2010/12/09/feds-pull-high-speed-rail-funds-from-wisconsin-ohio/?hpt=Sbin
OUCH! I agree with your :mad2:.
Why are cuntery eggs upsetting you?
Wrong thread
Bruce or UT , could you Please put this in the Whats makeing you Happy thread
rant coming. i'm upset. hell i'm far past upset. i'm fucking tired of people supporting ex-offenders (which again, i did not commit the crime but did the time...one word.."Texas") trying to make a better life yet do it in someone else's back yard? i'm tired of the motherfuckers at work bitching and complaining about how so and so isn't doing this or is doing that. i'm tired of all this shit bringing me down. yes i'm trying to turn it around only to take 1 step forward and getting set 5 back. my life sucks right now and yes i am partially to blame but there are other scenarios that play into this. like lies. oooohhhh lies. i fucking can't stand liars. more than that i hate being called a liar. why the hell would i lie? just one more damn thing to remember what you lied about. tell the truth. that way you don't have to remember what you lied about to retell the lie. ffs. i'm depressed, fucked off and mad. brilliant combination eh? i'm trying and have been for quite sometime to get back into engineering or get back into charter aviation but the "economy" doesn't allow this. or is it my "criminal background?" zip and brianr, you guys nailed it 5 years ago. wish i'd of listened. i'm tired guys. real tired.
Sounds pretty grim, plthijinx. Hope you find a route through it soon.
The 'lies' sound particularly troubling. Hate being called a liar. I don;t know who it is you're referring to, but I hope that gets sorted out soon too.
Are you qualified to teach pilots? Maybe there's a backdoor into the industry again through training schools?
My son is playing at the Joe Louis Arena tonight (home of the Redwings) then we are staying to watch the wings. It's also swim team banquet/awards night. My daughter made the really tough (and gallant) decision to go to the banquet and pick up the boys' awards with her own. SNOW DAY = banquet cancelled, chances of getting her a ticket at the discount price with our group - next to zero, so most likely I'll have to leave her behind. :(
Keep on Sloggen plthijinx !!!
There IS Light at the end of the tunnel
Plthijinx, things have to work out somehow. Sorry you are going through this right now.
SO not important, comparatively, but:
Just found out my club is closing it's doors for good, on Sunday.
It's almost the only place I ever go to have a beer! Those are my people!
I'll sure miss some of the regulars. :(
The Eagle has crashed and burned.
plthijinx I am sorry things are rough. Keep on keeping on...
Well, the Cellar is like a club. Except without the butlers and overstuffed furniture.
i'm trying guys. thanks griff, sky, kero n zip. i need all the help and support i can get. dana yeah i can teach officially for ground skool but am not certified to teach in the air. would love too. one day i will get my cfi (certified flight instructor) one day. not tomorrow but someday. i do love to teach. tried to get it about 9 years ago but that's another story. on a more positive note i changed out my transmission in the truck and it works perfectly!! i SO needed that uplift. pain in the ass to change it but wow, i just can't believe that it works!! job well done. shit i'm not sure which one was harder: getting the new tranny up there to mate the bolt holes? or putting back on the exhaust. either way it's done. now i have to attack the cam position sensor. best point is i smiled today.
smiling is good. Sorry they're few and far between right now.
Well, the Cellar is like a club. Except without the butlers and overstuffed furniture.
That is the kind of club where I used to WORK, not the kind of club I belong to. :p:
Keep smiling plt. It does help. It sounds trite, but when things are bad I think about how, in the end, none of it really matters. Grab happiness where you can find it and KNOW that better days will come.
I'm very impressed with you fixing your transmission.
My brother, who was a rocket scientist at the time, tried to fix the transmission on his beat up old car. Ended up having to have it towed to the junkyard after he took it apart. Just couldn't get it to work. You obviously have talent.
thanks shawnee n glatt. it was a royal pain in the ass but i got it done with the help of a buddy i work with. took us about 15 hours to accomplish. aamco wanted 650 bucks just to swap it out. i now know why! lol!
I am very upset about the plan just introduced in Congress to make massive cuts in housing assistance to low income seniors and disabled folks. I fall into both the senior and disabled catagories. If passed, these cuts will throw thousands if not hundreds of thousands onto the streets - me included. There is no way me and others like me will be able to survive being homeless. Merry Christmas from our millionaire congressmen. :( :mad: :(
Yesterday I went to the funeral of my father's 11 year old god-daughter, who was accidentally shot by her brother. Later in the day I was informed that my father has been telling people I am dead to him. These 2 things aren't related, and yet I'm struggling to deal with them both today.
Yesterday I went to the funeral of my father's 11 year old god-daughter, who was accidentally shot by her brother. Later in the day I was informed that my father has been telling people I am dead to him. These 2 things aren't related, and yet I'm struggling to deal with them both today.
That is pretty rough jinx. I hope you can figure out a way to connect with your Dad on some level.
So sorry, Jinx. My Mom did the same thing to me and passed on, never having said a word to me for the last 5 years of her life. I hope your Dad will see reason soon. :(
That sucks, jinx. I'm so sorry.
Wow, Jinx, I am so sorry to hear that. That is tragic.
Sorry to hear all this jinx :(
You've said it before People SUCK !!!
Jinx that is one shitty day.
If what your father says is true then it will hurt terribly.
All I can say is he's stupid and misguided. Unless he found those hobos..?
I'm not a parent, but I'm not much impressed with those that pretend their children are disposable - whatever age. Too many people long for children and family for that to be acceptable.
Sorry you're going through this.
I'd say some bad things about your father here, but I'm sure you love him and wouldn't want to read anyone bad mouthing him. It's a terrible situation, and I'm sorry. I hope he comes around.
Did you talk with him at all at the funeral yesterday? Was he normal with you? Or was he the one that told you this?
I'm sorry.
Jinx, I'm sorry to hear that. It's not good to be estranged from family ...
Thanks guys, I really appreciate your help thru this.
My dad and I have never been close. He's always been very self-involved and has hurt me with his dishonesty and selfishness to the point that I created a comfortable distance from him for myself years ago. My sister has always been closer to him, she puts a lot more effort in and takes more crap, but he has included her in his ill will... which hurts just as bad as his feeling towards me.
He wants something from us. Something he is not entitled to and should not have asked for but did anyway. Since we didn't say yes immediately, but were taking time and thinking it all thru together, we're dead to him. I'm just so blown away - even knowing what a shit he is I wasn't prepared for this.
I did see him at the funeral and he was as normal as he ever is - his wife wouldn't make eye contact with my sister or I but I didn't really notice until it was pointed out to me later just because it was such an awful situation to begin with. I thought everyone was just struggling to get thru the event. It's even more upsetting to realize they were able to be petty despite their grief. And now I'm pissed off about it.
And zippy is right on.
I am sorry, jinx. What a dreadful situation. It's rough when family can't seem to be accepting.
@Jinx, I'm sorry your Dad has disappointed you, I know the feeling quite well. And the below is not aimed at you specifically, just thinking about Zippy's remark. :hug:
Yeah Zippy's right, everyone sucks.
Oh wait, he said people suck.
But that's the same thing, right?
Hmmm, do your children suck?
Then um, some people suck?
It wouldn't be fair to include people that don't suck, because your pissed at people that do suck, would it?
Does somebody suck because they won't treat you the way you want?
Even if the way you want is alien to their values, their way of thinking?
How about if they don't even realize what you want?
Or how about they realize, but disagree that's proper, goes against what they want?
I guess everybody sucks to somebody else, sometimes knowingly because they disagree or don't care, sometimes not knowingly because they have different values, or accidentally because they think differently.
So yeah, we're all guilty... people suck.
Jinx, I'm sorry. I know it's probably no comfort, but the fact that people are telling you what he said is probably an indication that they can see past his POV and think he is being a jerk to you. If enough people think that there's a chance he may come to realize it too. I think my dad is, nearly 20 years after we parted ways. We'll never be close, but there is hope for "not dead to each other", and there may be for you too.
My neighbor across the street had all her presents for her grand-babies in the back seat of her car waiting to be mailed the next day. Unfortunately, a couple of juvenile Scrooges broke into her car and stole them. Now the little kids won't be getting anything from grandma. :( I'd have liked to see the look on those asshole's faces when they saw that they had made off with a bunch of little girls' dresses and baby blankets and baby toys. :thepain:
Sorry to hear the news Jinx. Like you need more stress. Peace.
My Secret Santa didn't arrive.
I feel like crying.
I've been logging on for weeks now, hoping to see a message from the recipient, but it's too late now.
I did post it late. But as far as I remember it had at least 3 weeks to get there.
Which is plenty of time.
Gutted for the person receiving, who no doubt was as excited every day as I was.
Gutted for myself, having let someone down so badly.
And just generally upset at good intentions that have come to nothing.
Now, SG, don't take on so. If I were the recipient (and who knows, maybe I am?!) I'd be looking forward to a surprise package to brighten that post-Christmas tristesse which we all get ...
Have they posted to say they haven't got anything yet? And it isn't too late in the US, yet.
One more year on my shoulders...
Better than a year on your knees, I bet.
My sister totally ruined our Christmas dinner. I wish I knew if something is going on with her healthwise but she doesn't seem to want to share. Everyone arrived in the afternoon to my Mother's and she called my Mother and claimed my Mom told her 6pm. Well my mom always says come over anytime. I had asked this sister on FB when she was going to my Mom's in the am and she said between 4-6pm. Well she told my younger sister to be there at 6pm/ So these 2 sisters come after they had a week fighting over my niece's wedding. [ugh] These two apparently had made up.[maybe?]
My younger sister who is also an Aunt to this niece went with her to try on her wedding dress not inviting the Mother [my other sis] maybe because the Aunt wanted to pay for the dress and my niece was being an opportunist because she knew her own Mom could not afford said dress. So me being the kind shoulder when my sister called crying saying they did not invite her for this moment , I calmed her down and prevented her from emailing her daughter a nasty venom filled email.
So why when she comes to our mother's house is it such a big deal what time to be there? No one cared when they came but when I mentioned she said 4-6 her response to me was fuck you she yelled at my mother saying she told her 6pm and that she was old and could not remember shit and out the door she went leaving us all thinking WTF? :eyebrow:
Should I mail her gifts or give them to the poor?
I'm sorry Nirvana, that really sucks.
Be the bigger person, if possible deliver the presents. You don't need to stay, just drop by and say "here I wanted you to have these" and leave. If she really is going through health issues, then she needs you all to be there for her all the more, even if she is being a bitch. Hopefully she'll come around and tell you whats wrong.
mtp seems wise on this one. I'm sorry for your pain.
Mum flipped out over Christmas dinner and yet somehow it's all now my fault.
Neither of my parents are talking to me.
The last thing Mum said to me was something about Dad not putting cutlery on the table, "He thinks we eat with our fucking hands obviously!"
It's been building for a while because of her bruised leg.
Since I've lived here we've gone out on Christmas Eve, into town and had a meal and drinks. Nothing fancy, just a pub meal, but it's kinda traditional now (Ste joined us last year and it was lovely, I posted pictures somewhere).
This year she decided that as it hurts to sit down (despite spending all week on the sofa) she wouldn't be going out. Dad wouldn't go without her. So they gave me some money and sent me into town to go alone. The money bit was nice, but it isn't possible to be alone on Christmas Eve, surrounded by people absorbed in friends and family, and not feel lonely. She asked me to bring them a Subway back, so I walked into town, got us all Subways and came home.
Christmas Day we were all going to go down the Dairy Maid for a drink.
No, Mum decided she couldn't risk it.
Dad and I went alone at her behest.
She was grumpy when we came back.
She got worse as the day went on, despite Dad helping in the kitchen and me calling, asking if I could help (ignored). Then there was the debacle of he table, where everything Dad did was wrong, and Mum shouting at him.
By the time we sat at the table I was almost tearful. Nothing had gone as planned, Mum was FURIOUS and still making nasty asides. I was finding it hard to eat. I did not say a word. She stormed out into the kitchen, halfway throught the meal and started washing up. And that was that. I couldn't eat any more - Dad took away both our nearly full plates. I asked if there was anything I could do - no said Dad - you'll just make it wirse.
We sat and watched Christmas TV while Mum sat in her room.
Since then, neither parent has spoken to me.
I've been hiding out in my room. Mum disappeared for hours yesterday and has been gone for hours today. No idea where (Dad is gone too). I suspect Mum has made the decision not to wash any of my clothes, given a comment she made to Dad. Yeah good luck - when I'm not at school I slob about in the same outfit for two days at a time. I'm sure one pair of knickers a day will make a huge ifference to your martyr's load!
Sigh.
I don't understand how she can possibly have translated her own 2 hour bitching session into something I have done wrong.
My sister and family were due here this afternoon/ evening.
I have a horrible suspicion that this has either been cancelled or relocated without my knowledge.
I'm trying to be kind, but I think I'll probably get drunk instead.
Gotta take all these fucking decorations down and store them now. Next year: NOT SO MUCH.
Sounds pretty shitty Sundae. Hope it all calms the fuck down for New Years.
Jebus H! I'm sorry for that awful drama in your life, SG. It must wear on you terribly. :(
Aww Sundae that's awful. I hope it all calms down soon.
I texted me niece to ask if they were still coming round. Simple question with no side to it. Apparently my BIL is under the weather, so it's cancelled. Not wanting to be paranoid I'll take that at face value.
Mum & Dad came home at 13.15.
I called down because I could hear their cat's tag clicking against her dish, and I had already fed her.
Mia always eats between 12.15-12.45 unless there is some emergency.
So, trying to make light of things I called down, "Oops! That's Mia's second meal!" Trying at least for jovial.
"The plate wasn't down, how were we supposed to know." Delivered in a furious voice(because I'd washed up her dish and put it away).
"Sorry for feeding her then, it's just she always eats at 12.30".
I shouldn't have replied, but there was no further comment anyway.
What sort of petty bitch does she think I am? That I would let an elderly cat wander about without feeding her at her usual time, just because Mum is pissed at me?
So. No resolution soon it seems.
Have you asked them what it is they are angry about? Or rather, what it is you have done to anger them?
That's not the way we play here.
Asking Mum would be deemed confrontation. And that leads to shouting and storming out and silence. Asking Dad would be putting him in an untenable position.
I just have to ride it out, and hope I don't hear anything nasty about myself in the mean time.
Bloody hell. That would drive me totally tonto.
Awww Sundae walking on eggshells is the worst feeling! I dunno why the holidays turns people into weirdos. :( I try to just be nice to the "angries" or stay away from them and decide it really is their problem not mine.
SG, if you were to surprise Mom by making her a cup of tea,
or get her a warm blanket when she sits on the couch,
or pick up a blossom for at the florist, or something like that,
I'll bet it would do one of two things:
Either it would break the tension and smooth things out for a while,
Or, it could make Mom so frustrated you'd have the satisfaction of one-ups-manship.
Either way, your own day could be little better
P.S. If it works, don't do too often as Mom will come to expect it,
and get ticked off all over again. :rolleyes:
Have you noticed:
when women her about a problem they offer sympathy
when men hear about a problem they try to fix it
the former is usually better
I don't know. I am sort of the latter, and if that didn't work, I would move.
I am not very good with sympathy.
For you SG:
It's not passive aggressive if you are a total suck up and doormat.
I was thinking about that scripture last week, wondering if that's what it meant.
I just found out my dentist passed away. Suddenly, it seems, though I have no idea what happened. He was only a year older than me. He and his staff were wonderful when I went through my 19th Dental Breakdown (2010 Edition.) I really liked him, even though he was a relatively "new" dentist to me. The office was beautiful, full of personal touches like a bird sanctuary type thing you could see from all the chairs (I love birds) and all the ceilings were painted with the sky, but each one different: sort of stormy, clear and sunny, etc.
It happened last week but I didn't look at the online obits when I was off last week. A friend called to tell me: he had found out from his dentist office when he visited recently.
RIP Dr. J. :(
Bloody hell. That would drive me totally tonto.
Tonto? Like the long ranger's tonto? hehe That's a great expression, anyway.
@SG. Sorry about your troubles. I hate that kind of thing. Unless it's a person with a disability,
( because maybe they don't know and start perservating) I prefer just to clear the air and ask straight out what the matter is. Reading what you have said, it doesn't look like that is an option.
ps. poor dentist. I hate to hear when someone unexpectedly passes.
Forecast: rain, rain, and rain for the foreseeable future
G-son came over this morning to say there's a water leak coming down his living room wall.
OMG - leak has been there a long time, so we have a mold problem too.
I couldn't find any obvious damage on the roof, so a phone call to our friendly "Bob, the Builder".
"Bob" says he'll be right there to fix it... sometime tomorrow
G-son and landlord are going to have a friendly discussion about reporting problems promptly.
Tonto? Like the long ranger's tonto? hehe That's a great expression, anyway.
My new British Swearing Dictionary is not of any assistance here.
I vaguely recall that Tonto is Spanish for "stupid."
I'm guessing it means "completely mental."
ahh thank you kemo sabe ^
For us old folk, tonto has only one meaning... the Lone Ranger's sidekick.
So
here's some folk lore in that vein about it meaning "fool"
Isn't it true that Tonto means "fool" in Spanish?
This *is* true, but it was not that meaning that was intended by the producers of the show.
There are two versions of the story.
Fran Striker told the Saturday Evening Post that he invented Tonto's name
and that it was picked by merely alterring the consanants in the name Bobo.
(This was a caveman character Striker had created in another radio program.)
Jim Jewell says that Striker was remembering wrong.
Tonto, he said, is another Potowatomie word.
There were a few Indians who would come to the camp to tell stories to the children.
One of the Indians apparently had a penchant for drinking after the children had gone to sleep.
Sometimes he would get rowdy and the other Indians would call him "tonto." This meant "wild one."
Jewell remembered the word, liked it, and gave the name to the Lone Ranger's Indian companion.
I had no idea that tonto really meant fool.
We say tonto simply to mean someone going fruitloop or doing their nut.
Or mental, mental, chicken oriental.
Wolf - if it's not rude or crude you probably won't find it in the Profanisaurus :)
I have never said "Tonto" or "mental, mental, chicken oriental"
I will confess to having said 'mental mental chicken oriental' once or twice :P Though that has now become shorthanded to mental oriental.
If I were walking the streets there and I heard grown women saying that, I would not be able to not grin like a tonto.
Why, why, chicken thigh or ya know what? chicken butt, that's what.
Never chicken oriental.
Never chicken oriental.
How about chicken asian-american?
I had no idea that tonto really meant fool.
We say tonto simply to mean someone going fruitloop or doing their nut.
Or mental, mental, chicken oriental.
I like the mental, mental chicken oriental. Flows off the tongue that does.
One of the shorthand terms we use is CCFCP.
[COLOR="White"](Coo Coo for Cocoa Puffs)[/COLOR]
I have never said "Tonto" or "mental, mental, chicken oriental"
Have you ever said, "I'll risk it for a biscuit?"
I'd definately risk it for a biscuit.
I suspect that the advert that started that whole 'mental mental, chicken oriental' thing went out after monster left the uk. Early -mid 90s as i recall.
It was an advert?!
Well there you go - I thought it was just a random phrase.
I'd definately risk it for a biscuit.
I suspect that the advert that started that whole 'mental mental, chicken oriental' thing went out after monster left the uk. Early -mid 90s as i recall.
Winner winner chicken dinner!
Yes to "risk it for a biscuit"
There was a young man from Nepal
Who went to a fancy dress ball.
He thought he would risk it
To go as a biscuit,
But a dog ate him up in the hall!
we left the uk in 2001. Early to mid 90s I was at uni watching way too much tv......
How about chicken asian-american?
Chickity China the Chinese chicken
You have a drumstick and your brain stops tickin'
Watchin' X-Files with no lights on
We're dans la maison
I hope the Smoking Man's in this one
Like Harrison Ford I'm getting frantic
Like Sting I'm tantric
Like Snickers, guaranteed to satisfy
Like Kurasawa I make mad films
OK I don't make films
But if I did they'd have a samurai.
Gonna get a set of better clubs
Gonna find the kind with tiny nubs just so my
irons aren't always flying off the back-swing
Gotta get in tune with Sailor Moon
Cause that cartoon has got the boom anime babes
that make me think the wrong thing
Much as I've practiced, I still can't do that really fast part without stumbling. Ed Robertson...da man!
[COLOR="LemonChiffon"](swoonage!)[/COLOR]
I have absolutely no fucking idea what you guys are on about. But whatever you're smoking, I'll have some of it!
[YOUTUBE]pPo9ISQpzvM[/YOUTUBE]
Wish I could stop time and read all of these posts. *grabs hair* Argh! I need a break.
Priorities man, priorities. ;)
The behaviour of a certain 9yo boy :(
Get All Shouty and Smacky on his Young ASS !!!
I got a little shouty but no smacky and very fucking punitive. We've pretty much reached the conclusion that, in general, punishments just don't work with him, but this was too big to be ignored. He has spent the whole day only being allowed to draw, write, do chores or hockey stick handling drills. No toys, no games, no computers and definitely no reading. It was Banana Lady's day to take them all to the toystore, though, and she would have been upset if we banned him from going. So we let him go, but he wasn't allowed to touch/play in the store. he got to choose and he can't play with it until tomorrow and then only IF he's an angel at school. yes, he was that bad.
Sorry to hear that Monster.
Sounds like you're doing the best you can without getting smacky.
Looks like Dana, Limey and I won't get to see John Barrowman on the 9th.
Today is the 3rd and he is still off with what is being rumoured as pleurisy. And as soon as he finishes Panto, he's off to the US for 6 months filming Torchwood - so he has to be well rested. Doing two pantos a day even if he is recovering is hardly counted as rest.
I am resigning myself to it now, as I am resigned to the fact my clothes probably won't arrive in time either :(
I don't know if this will help with the eventual disappointment or whether I am denying myself four-six days of excitement instead...
I made a huge mistake. He's a nice guy, but I'm just not ready to be in a relationship. Really from the beginning I knew this, and knew he was not "my type."
No idea how I'm gonna extradite myself from this, he loves me, he loves Della, he owes me a good chunk of money, and I have no where to move. :(
Ouch Moar. That sucks.
@ Sundae: I am actually rather curious to see John's understudy.
I got a little shouty but no smacky and very fucking punitive. We've pretty much reached the conclusion that, in general, punishments just don't work with him, but this was too big to be ignored. He has spent the whole day only being allowed to draw, write, do chores or hockey stick handling drills. No toys, no games, no computers and definitely no reading. It was Banana Lady's day to take them all to the toystore, though, and she would have been upset if we banned him from going. So we let him go, but he wasn't allowed to touch/play in the store. he got to choose and he can't play with it until tomorrow and then only IF he's an angel at school. yes, he was that bad.
Coventry?
Coventryish. Coventry would be too mean for such an inquisitive chatterbox. He survived. And no email from his teacher yet.... but the day is young
I am actually rather curious to see John's understudy.
phnarr phnarr
MTP - Yup - been there and it's bloody awful.
All you can do is be honest and keep breathing.
At some point it will all be over.
The finances and living arrangements make things much more complicated though :(
Coventryish. Coventry would be too mean for such an inquisitive chatterbox. He survived. And no email from his teacher yet.... but the day is young
Nobody expects the chatterobx inquisition! Our chief weapon is being really annoying and not stopping when we are asked to. And sulking. And Glares. Amongst our weaponry...
*snort* You've met him then.....
I made a mistake. A human error, at work. Nothing major, just sent an informative email to a few wrong people. No harm no foul.
Someone wrote back to the FA email sayign they were going to contact the pres and god and everyone else. OVER AN EMAIL THAT WAS JUST AN ERROR. AN EMAIL THAT DOESN'T IDENTIFY ANYTHING BUT THE RECIPIENT. You should have read it, you'd think I killed their dog (accidentally sent the parent plus email to a few sub/unsub loan students: it just tells them their next steps.)
I'm going to quit, I swear. People are horrible and insane and stupid and I've had it with catering to them. :(
Fuck fuck fuck. God I hate my life.
Stupid people.
It'll be fine. Just have to get through today and it's the weekend.
Sorry. My boss told me not to worry about it, the student went a "little overboard."
I'd say.
What upsets me is that I let this crap upset me.
"I think I could turn and live with animals
They are so placid and self contain'd."
--Walt Whitman
edit: thanks glatt. My rough exterior belies my extreme sensitivity. :o
Awwwww, Shawnee...:comfort:. I know the feeling.
... My rough exterior bellies ... :o
I was wondering what this was?
I was wondering what this was?
LOL
Well, the plural looks about right. ;)
speaking of sending emails...my dumb ass forgot the little "." in between my buddies first and last name two weeks ago when i had tried to send him my resume to get back into engineering. so today i was thinking that i hadn't heard from him and sent a follow up email. no reply. looked in my contacts and sure as shit i entered his email incorrectly and i didn't receive a send error. now he has my resume. :fingerx:
Good luck plthijinx!
Shaw, I'm glad your boss understood. We all have moments like that. My job has added a part in our call where we have to ask "is this a new or continuing issue?" its a horrible thing to ask, 1: they never give a truthful answer, or even know the answer, 2: we have the call history right there in the system, its a hell of a lot easier just to look it up.
I've already gotten a 0% on a call because I didn't "verbally confirm history" even though i stated it in my notes. Fuck 'em. Its a stupid thing to ask. I'm their best agent, so they can go fuck 'emselves.
Good luck plt!
mtp: ch'yeah, I know! People are petty. Oh, and stupid. Don't forget stupid.
I don't know if I'm going to get my drunk on tonight, or if I'm going to take a couple tylenol PM and curl into my bed and sleep like a baby.
Well, that's settled. My best friend called me and tonight I'm getting my drunk on. Eh, I've been good for a whole week. I need a night of beer and yahtzee, or whatever game we decide to play. :)
Strip poker with progress pics for the dweller NSFW thread!
Strip poker with progress pics for the dweller NSFW thread!
Seconded !!!
In six months, her daughter will officially receive a diagnosis. Mark my fucking words. Goddammit.
Been seven months, what happened?
Currently diagnosed PDD-NOS. Mom is still sure she's "just going through a shy phase." We hang out, but we don't discuss it.
Well dang. Best of luck to them.
We know my computer is on it's last legs, but today, as it's whirring away (when it shouldn't be) it sounds like muttley with a chest infection. we could do with another month or two...... :(
oh, and, I need a crown and I've put it off until beest's new flex plan kicks in (supposed to be 17th Jan) and his company just shifted the goalposts to an unknown date. Dentist says i can't wait much longer, budget says i must. fuckers.
Strip poker with progress pics for the dweller NSFW thread!
Strip poker with progress pics for the dweller NSFW thread!
Seconded !!!
THIRD!!!
Not quite upsetting, but unsettling at least.
Emails from my Aunt in Brisbane.
Well our floods are just getting worst and it is expected that we will cop it in Brisbane today. Do not panic as we are at least 3k from the river and in the 74 flood our house was Ok. Cut off but OK.
It is such a disaster – Jim and Hannah [my Uncle & cousin] were in Toowoomba last week and its hard to imagine a wall of water that big.
We have plenty of provisions and have power at the moment. We are expecting another storm later this afternoon and its been bucketing down for the last few hours.
Our local shopping centre at Toombul is prone to flooding with a creek running alongside it. Dad may remember the year the last time he came they were sandbagging the creek side of the shopping centre with the water lapping the doors. Did not stop the locals from shopping. You went to Toombul when you were over it is near the airport. Jim was out and about this morning and it looks as though the water has been flowing over the bridge just before the shopping centre.
I guess we are lucky in that we have a high set house and its not built in underneath. Worse case scenario it will effect the car and the laundry. We have a nice lake developing in the front yard as it is just below road level.
Have just heard on the news that it is starting to come into the city alongside the riverside café area as well as west end which is on the opposite side to the city.
Its hard to imagine but the bad weather is heading done the coast and if that is the case we will have a flood that cover ½ of Europe.
Today has been a little bit surreal. Very quiet no one around almost like a public holiday. We went down to the river at Hamilton this morning, they were sandbagging the restaurant on the broadwalk and there was a lot of people around having a look. The Hamilton reach of the river is the widest part so it is not expected to be too bad at our end. It is near the mouth of the river. There was a lot of debris going past – boats, pontoons, oil drums, fridges it was amazing.
We have not lost power and still have water although our rubbish was not collected today. They have told us it may be Monday before we get a collection but that’s Ok we can live with it. We have not lost our water supply although we have been told to conserve water and have been warned that we may loose supply as the water treatment plants have been effected.
The city centre is under water and the power has been cut.
The government have been very good and we are getting constant information via the TV and radio. We also have a early warning that comes via the mobile phone network. The river is due to peak at 4am and we will need to see what that brings. They are however also forecasting that we will get a tropical cyclone just around Australia day on the 26th so may have a double whamy lets hope that they are wrong.
Don’t know how long we will have internet coverage as the network is being effected obviously along with our phones.
All is well with us
These floods in Australia are simply amazing. That video of the water rising into the parking lot and cars being picked up and washed downstream just blew me away.
If you've never witnessed an actual flood, it's hard to imagine how impressive the power and noise can be. You don't know if it will get worse, or how long it will last, it's full of surprises... a constantly changing tableau you're powerless the do anything about, except try to stay out of harm's way.
There's the rushing/roaring center flow called the floodway, then as the water rises it creeps silently out over the adjoining landscape. Standing there mesmerized by the floodway, you suddenly realize your feet are wet, or you're standing on a rise and the water has circled around behind you. It's worse at night.
edit: Aussies have another problem.
It's rather ironic that they are being asked to conserve water.
We get flooding like that but I can't imagine having large crocodiles rising with the waters.
yikes!
Where are you, Venice?
Let me check. * looks out the window* nope. No gondolas. I guess not.
sigh, I so wish for a ride in a gondola. :yelsick:
I should have said, flooding as in that photo minus the gator.Vegas should see a doctor and get rid of it.
It can't, what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.
Last night I tried a new recipe and made a strawberry bundt cake with strawberry glaze.
It wasn't perfect - I used my super-strong American gel colour to tint it rosy pink and forgot just how strong it is - there was something vaguely medical perhaps even tumerous about the red cake and crumbs... And I put too much cornflour in the galze - it was perfect consistency, but I could taste the flour. Needed more flavour perhaps.
I didn't even take a photo of it.
Dads dropped me off at school, as he always does when I have a cake to carry. The glaze had set it onto the plate, which was covered with the cake tin, despite Mum worrying it wasn't safe. It was, perfectly safe.
So there is a bit of to-ing and fro-ing when we reach school. I was super-early but there are always cars parking, dropping off, trying to get back out, trying to get it. Dad wanted to pull forward into a proper space but a lady was illegally parked opposite and he didn't want to block the road, so suggested I got out there.
All well and good. Except I did not know or see that there were mid-calf-high bollards in the grass verge to prevent people from pulling up on it. Trip. Fall. Smash. I went arse over tit, the cake smosshed into my arm and chest, the empty tin went rolling down the street and I just sat there, in the mud, surrounded by broken cake and trying not to cry.
Too add insult to injury, one of the Dads sprinted across the road to help, not realising the red explosion he had seen when I went down was in fact yummy strawberry bundt cake and not blood. I just looking up at him and said sadly, "It's not blood. It's cake." Bless him for his reation of course. He went to help me up but I declined, having muddy, cakey, glazed red hands.
Dad brought me back home and when he opened the door what was the first thing Mum said? "I TOLD you you should have put it in a tin!" She did redeem herself after my shower and change of clothes, by offering me a cup of tea and being impressed that I preferred to go straight back to school.
And after all I left her with all the mess to tidy up (plate, cake-tin, and a very sweet smelling top and muddy trousers).
So that was today's adventure.
I'm not really upset, but I do my cake's ignominious end.
I am sure it would have been delicious had it lived! :)
I don't think that I can take it
Cause it took so long to bake it
And I'll never have that recipe again!
I don't think that I can take it
Cause it took so long to bake it
And I'll never have that recipe again!
:lol: You reminded me of this, can't believe I found it on youtube and haven't heard it in YEARS!
It's just a cake, pal. Stable guy!
[YOUTUBE]3kkcilFQc3A[/YOUTUBE]
I think I may have told this story here, but you invoked MacArthur Park, so here goes.
When my sister was in High School (C.1978) she got to her math class one morning to see all the lyrics to MacArthur Park written out on the black board. When the bell rang and class started the math teacher went berserk, yelling at the class and pointing at the black board, "NEVER LET THIS HAPPEN TO YOU!" The class pretty much had no idea what to say other than to acquiesce and agree they "would never let that happen to them." Then it was onto sines and cosines...
Spring was never waiting for us, girl
It ran one step ahead
As we followed in the dance
Between the parted pages and were pressed,
In love's hot, fevered iron
Like a striped pair of pants
CHORUS
MacArthur's Park is melting in the dark
All the sweet, green icing flowing down...
Someone left the cake out in the rain
I don't think that I can take it
'cause it took so long to bake it
And I'll never have that recipe again
Oh, no!
I recall the yellow cotton dress
Foaming like a wave
On the ground around your knees
The birds, like tender babies in your hands
And the old men playing checkers by the trees
CHORUS
There will be another song for me
For I will sing it
There will be another dream for me
Someone will bring it
I will drink the wine while it is warm
And never let you catch me looking at the sun
And after all the loves of my life
After all the loves of my life
You'll still be the one.
I will take my life into my hands and I will use it
I will win the worship in their eyes and I will lose it
I will have the things that I desire
And my passion flow like rivers through the sky.
And after all the loves of my life
After all the loves of my life
I'll be thinking of you
And wondering why.
MacArthur's Park is melting in the dark
All the sweet, green icing flowing down...
Someone left the cake out in the rain
I don't think that I can take it
'cause it took so long to bake it
And I'll never have that recipe again
Oh, no!
Oh, no
No, no
Oh NO!!
Stop it!
This was a genuine story of a real person who you know - ME! - being hurt, and humiliated and having the work of their heart destroyed. Please can you show some more compassion?
I FELL OVER.
MY CAKE WAS DESTROYED.
Show some compassion people.
Or I will curse you with small and random bollards forever.
Oh I hear ya, hon. There's a reason my mom always called me Grace, as in "way to go, Grace!" ;)
:comfort:
Sorry SG !
Those un sensitive Bastiges should be ignored !!
Sorry SG. We aren't laughing at you. We are laughing near you.
"How was charm school Grace?"
I'm pretty sure you guys knew I was milking it...
But thought it best to say so just in case :)
Stop it!
This was a genuine story of a real person who you know - ME! - being hurt, and humiliated and having the work of their heart destroyed. Please can you show some more compassion?
I FELL OVER.
MY CAKE WAS DESTROYED.
Show some compassion people.
Or I will curse you with small and random bollards forever.
At first I thought you were saying that this maths teacher was your teacher and I began to worry about my sanity, I am sure this happened to my sister. Imagine my relief to realize you were referring to your cake contretemps. Then my horror at thinking I was making fun of your misfortune. I am many things but not a person who laughs at people falling. Even more so when pastry are involved.
I too feel strong sympathy for you SG. I'm sorry you tripped and fell in the mud and ruined the cake.
But I can't even type that sentence without almost breaking into song.
'Cause it took so long to make it,
and you'll never have that recipe again!
Oh no!
I'm pretty sure you guys knew I was milking it...
But thought it best to say so just in case :)
Oh, I knew dat. It was almost as if your tongue were in MY cheek. :D
You're still making fun of me.
I am going to write a book about my traumatic experience.
And trust me, even if you are in it, I won't spell your names right.
You wouldn't scoff at James Frey, would you?
You're still making fun of me.
I am going to write a book about my traumatic experience.
And trust me, even if you are in it, I won't spell your names right.
You wouldn't scoff at James Frey, would you?
Well not to his FACE. :rolleyes:
Swooning at the Clueless reference....
Yet more plumbing problems in This Old House ... :greenface
And it just had to wait until 4 pm Friday to reveal it's yucky self.
Never fear. It shall be fixed by ye olde grumpe handyman.
Upsetting me today: people who have never tried something because they already know it won't work, and they know this because they have 14 years of experience in never trying it. And the only thing they can think to do with this experience is to yell at people who are on the fence, because apparently it's critical that they lose all hope right here and now, before they do something rash that might accidentally improve the health of their children. Misery truly does love company.
Wait, you're telling us that the entire cellar is upsetting you today?
Yet more plumbing problems in This Old House ...
And it just had to wait until 4 pm Friday to reveal it's yucky self.
Never fear. It shall be fixed by ye olde grumpe handyman.
Aint it Grand Owning a Home ??
Good Luck , Oh And Wash yer hands AFTER !!!!
Looks like food to me, that tail ought to yield a few pounds of meat. The skin is worth a fortune to the Italians for hand bags and shoes.
Yet more plumbing problems in This Old House ... :greenface
And it just had to wait until 4 pm Friday to reveal it's yucky self.
Never fear. It shall be fixed by ye olde grumpe handyman.
Hey hey hey... it's fixed ! :biggrin:
Hand snake didn't do it, but the mighty POWER SNAKE with a paddle tip got it first try.
We are now shifting over to the "What's making you happy today" thread.
Upsetting me today: people who have never tried something because they already know it won't work, and they know this because they have 14 years of experience in never trying it. And the only thing they can think to do with this experience is to yell at people who are on the fence, because apparently it's critical that they lose all hope right here and now, before they do something rash.
I know one of these people. Except she doesn't yell, just moans that one might as well save energy because it's not going to work and in fact will probably have the opposite effect of whatever is hoped for.....
i'm falling into my funk again. i need a project.
Learn to knit if you can't already
I think the Houston Ship Channel needs some cleanning up
I think the Houston Ship Channel needs some cleanning up
lol and then some! i drive over it every time i go to work and back on 610. it's nasty but fascinating at the same time. quite beautiful at night. all the refineries and all. then again, maybe you have to be in engineering to appreciate it....i dunno.
martial arts? You could two bird that fitness thing as well.
very true and that is something i'd like to do. matter of fact my roommate used to be an aikedo (sp?) instructor. i'd love to do martial arts.
takes too much time to master
Looks like food to me, that tail ought to yield a few pounds of meat. The skin is worth a fortune to the Italians for hand bags and shoes.
That is a fact, jack. Reptile *scraps* fetch $85 a pound at my local leather shop.
Stupid boyfriend is being stupid. He says he wants to quit his job this week after he gets paid the $5k his boss owes him, which is doubtful his boss will pay him all that since he's an asshole and has been sitting on about $1000 for 2months already. B/f says he can find another job quick, which is what he said when he quit his last job prematurely, and that did not happen. WTF? Does he learn nothing from his past mistakes? Oh and this breaks a promise where he said he wouldn't quit a job w/o having another one already. We live together, I rely on him to be able to pay his bills, and he owes me $1200 from me helping him out the last time he did this. Then he has the nerve to tell me that I shouldn't worry about it! That its not my problem! If he doesn't pay his portion of the bills I'm out on the street too! WTF?
I almost forgot about the no fucking fun policy. Good to see it being endorsed by everyone, though.
Just got an email I nearly junked without reading because it had no subject. Something made me read it, and it informed me of the death of a lovely lady whose holiday apartment we rented in France. It was attached to her house in the Cevennes, above her art and ceramic studio, and most evenings we'd join her and her husband for a glass of wine in their beautiful garden filled with fuschias of every type imaginable. Every Christmas she sent us lovely watercolor cards she had painted of the gorgeous scenery in her village. I always looked forward to them and have kept every one. I'm pretty sad right now. I think she was the wife of Banana lady's cousin. Family, but that wasn't what made her special. She loved to get pictures of the kids and asked after them, even though she only evey met Hebe as an infant. I vividly remember Hebe sitting in the hallway in that apartment with her hand over her ears and a look of shock on her face as she encountered a hairdryer for the first time. A happy time with lovely people. I always hoped to return to see her again.
You know monster, sometimes I think the best we can hope for is that when we pass away, someone has such fond and beautiful memories of us. Sounds like a lovely person, and I'm sorry for the loss of your dear friend.
I need to compose a proper letter of condolence and I think I'll put these memories in. I'm going to try and root out a photo from that vacation to put on the front of a card. I think. I just talked to Banan lady, wasn't sure if she'd have checked her email and I'm glad i did -just recovering from cataract surgery she's finding it hard to read emails at the moment.
The email says the death was sudden and she was no spring chicken. I'm hoping it was not preceded by any suffering. A lovel ylady living out a dream retirement in the mountains in France. She lost her husband a good few years back, but still travelled back to England a lot to see her grandkids. She had a good life, I think, even though i didn't really know her all that well. We just always exchanged cards and the occasional snippet at christmas. I hope she got the card with the recent school pics we sent. we don't send them every year. I'm rambling. Sorry. Home alone all day.
the email didn't say she was no spring chicken, that was all my tactless own wording. oh dear.
My paternal grandmother would joke about being 'no spring chicken.' She was a jokester though, and told me that (after grandpa passed away after 55 years of marriage) that she was looking for 'a rich man with one foot in the grave and the other on a banana peel.' Of course she wasn't really looking, she was just funny.
Your friend sounds like she had a wonderful life. :)
I have not driven my car for about 2 weeks because all it does is snow here. Well I wanted to drive it today and some $%##^%^$# mouse has made a nest right on top of the engine and chewed a wire to the black box thingamabob that goes to the engine or somethin' WTF! :mad2: :mad:
well, any tips for washing one's hair with half gallon of water? a sponge bath I can do, but I'd really like to wash my hair before work tomorrow. If we even are working, with no water.
Is this all the water you have, or the imposed rules?
Tip is not to use shampoo and re-use the water several times -put it in a bowl, bend your head over and use a jug to pour it over your head. Massage your scalp between waterings.
well, I have more water than half a gallon in several containers; fortunately I had about 20 minutes' notice, but no water out of the tap. We're in a city-wide "water emergency" to conserve water. Not to hard, since I don't have any!
thanks for the tip; that sounds good
Can you buy a jug somewhere close? 2 gallons would do it. 1/2 to get wet, 1/2 to rinse shampoo, and one whole jug to rinse the conditioner and get everything all out..
There are several brands of waterless shampoo available. If you can't find any, you can fake it with some baby powder ... comb it through your hair and it will soak up any excess oil.
I have jugs of drinking water, and several buckets worth of probably non-potable unless I boil it. But water is scarce in the stores, and we have no idea how long this stupid crisis will end, so 1/2 gallon was my estimate of the least amount I could use.
oh, and I've already done the powder trick, but I'd prefer actual washed hair for work tomorrow, as it's already been several days.
We are generally a shampoo-free household. It takes much less water. But you have to wash it more often whilst your scalp gets used to it. The afore-mentioned process is how I wash my hair when we are backwoods camping. It works just fine. It's nicer and works better with hot water. But cold works too. If you really really really need to use shampoo, I would rinse as I described a few times, and then use the minimal amount of shampoo you can get away with, concentrating on the scalp/roots, then do one final watering to rinse that out
excellent; this is what I need, thanks!
I've tried the "no-poo/low-poo" thing for several months, as I do have curly hair. in the end, I didn't like the way it left my hair, so I went back to sulfate free shampoo. Like that better.
We started the kids out shampoo-free, but when they became swimmers, we found they needed chlorine-stripping shampoo occasionally, and intensive conditioner. My (short) hair is great without shampoo, but I do use shampoo everytime I bleach to make sure the bleach is washed out. That's maybe 3 times a year. Beest never uses shampoo -stopped before i did, about 20 years ago, but his thick long hair gets lanky if he misses a day in the shower.
Shampoo for our real friends and real poo for our sham friends!
well, did it. sponge bath and "manual" hair washing. I feel refreshed! we'll see how my hair looks tomorrow, ha!
Was told by my mechanic it must have been a %$^&&^& squirrel as opposed to a regular squirrel because he ate thru an entire plug wire and part of the smaller wiring. %$^$^%$&*& They will replace all the plug wires which means removing part of the engine and all he could tell me was that he hates PT Cruisers because of this. Wonder how much that bill will be >:-/
I have to have my whole damn thyroid removed.
rly? why? beest got away with having only half removed, but some doctors were gung-ho for the whole thing. Did you get a bazillion opinions? Scary stuff, mtp, very upsetting, I agree
Oh MTP! I agree with Mon very scary and get more opinions!
rly? why? beest got away with having only half removed, but some doctors were gung-ho for the whole thing. Did you get a bazillion opinions? Scary stuff, mtp, very upsetting, I agree
Had a biopsy on my a big nodule on my thyroid, its some sort of lesion apparently. Something like 20% are cancer, but no way to tell if its cancer for sure except to remove it for testing. This was just the largest nodule they tested, I have a lot of other small ones on my thyroid as well. Did meds for a year but it did not shrink. My mom had to have her thyroid and most of her parathyroids removed, and she turned out to have cancer. My endocrinologist is my mom's also, we have a lot of trust for the man. He knows all the family history, thats part of why he's making this call. I'm not really scared about the medical side, just paying for it is freaking me out. I even asked my doc outright if I could wait a couple of years. He said that was not a good idea in case it is cancer and it increases even more. This really sucks, my Doc seems pretty disappointed too. When I saw him for a check up in January he was thinking I was probably all better since my thyroid itself had shrunk back to normal. The double-check ultrasound showed that the nodule had not shrunk though, so he had to send me for the biopsy and so on.
Well I guess there goes my plans to move to Austin. Defiantly will not be able to afford it.
oh, very scary, MTP. wish you the best, and fuck cancer.
GET A SECOND OPINION!
Have you had tests to establish whether your major nodule is cold or hot?
your case sounds so much like beest's.....
.....and he had the dodgy nodule biopsied for cancer while he was on the table ...and it came back negative. 20% is pretty much the minimum chance they give.
regarding funding/urgency of surgery.... have you had biopsies? Is the nodule hot or cold? DO NOT avoid a second opinion because of cost issues. If medical money was ever well spent, it was on second and third opinions.
Had a biopsy on my a big nodule on my thyroid, its some sort of lesion apparently. Something like 20% are cancer, but no way to tell if its cancer for sure except to remove it for testing. This was just the largest nodule they tested, I have a lot of other small ones on my thyroid as well. Did meds for a year but it did not shrink. My mom had to have her thyroid and most of her parathyroids removed, and she turned out to have cancer. My endocrinologist is my mom's also, we have a lot of trust for the man. He knows all the family history, thats part of why he's making this call. I'm not really scared about the medical side, just paying for it is freaking me out. I even asked my doc outright if I could wait a couple of years. He said that was not a good idea in case it is cancer and it increases even more. This really sucks, my Doc seems pretty disappointed too. When I saw him for a check up in January he was thinking I was probably all better since my thyroid itself had shrunk back to normal. The double-check ultrasound showed that the nodule had not shrunk though, so he had to send me for the biopsy and so on.
Well I guess there goes my plans to move to Austin. Defiantly will not be able to afford it.
Best of Luck MTP !!!
FUUUUUUCCCCKKKK Cancer !!!
ouch mtp! :eek:
nirvana - he has to do what? remove what? pics. i need pics. you may be able to do this yourself and save an ass load of cash.
oh and mtp def get a second opinion. my father was a general surgeon he always recommended second opinions. sometimes third and fourths too.....just saying....
Because I had an urgent assignment to complete and was not sure whether I will be able to complete it on time :mad2:. Though irritated I worked really hard and the end result, yes, I was able to do it completely :):D
GET A SECOND OPINION!
Have you had tests to establish whether your major nodule is cold or hot?
your case sounds so much like beest's.....
.....and he had the dodgy nodule biopsied for cancer while he was on the table ...and it came back negative. 20% is pretty much the minimum chance they give.
regarding funding/urgency of surgery.... have you had biopsies? Is the nodule hot or cold? DO NOT avoid a second opinion because of cost issues. If medical money was ever well spent, it was on second and third opinions.
I had a biopsy last Friday. Its a follicular lesion. How old was Beest when he had his lobectomy?
This is why my doc is saying to do the full thing:
LOBECTOMY: This procedure is associated with a lower incidence of complications, but approximately 5% to 10% of patients will have a recurrence in the thyroid following lobectomy.[10]
Patients younger than 45 years will have the longest follow-up period and the greatest opportunity for recurrence.
With my family history, my risk of recurrence and cancer are higher than if I did not have thyroid issues. My mom is just the tip of the iceberg on that, I have an aunt, great aunts, ect that have/had thyroid issues. Sure, another doc might say I only need a lobectomy (I'm sure I could find one), but they could be wrong also and I'd end up having to have a 2nd surgery as well. This is not the only nodule on my thyroid, just the largest right now. I have them on both lobes.
Its a really hard decision to even bother getting a 2nd opinion. I simply can't afford it. I can't even really afford the 1st opinion or the surgery. The fact that this is gonna cause me to have to put off transferring even longer, is already tearing me up. I just want to get past this and get on with my life ASAP.
Oh ouch, what a horrid decision. I'm always minimalist re surgery. beest was mid 30s. He turns 40 this year.
I've been reading up on my mom's condition which was Multiple Endocrine Neoplasia Type 2B (aka Type 3). They thyroid cancer and parathyroid issues were just 2 parts of the issue, the 3rd was a tumor on her pituitary gland. According to WebMD:
All MEN 2 subtypes are inherited in an autosomal dominant manner. Offspring of affected individuals have a 50% chance of inheriting the gene mutation.
Oh joy.
To top it off, the boyfriend decided to have a guy's night with a friend tonight. Normally not a big deal to me, but I am really really depressed right now. I told him I would be lonely, and asked to come along. His answer? "I don't think Ryan meant for you to come along." WTF? He doesn't even bother to ask said friend, and supposedly all they are doing is playing xbox at friend's house. I can't tell him not to go, that makes me a bitch. Boyfriend didn't even give me decent warning, he came home and was all over me. I hinted that we could do that later since we REALLY needed to go to the grocery store and if we got distracted we wouldn't make it. Then at the grocery store he tells me he's not even going to stay home this evening. Why would someone do that? Why make overtures when you're not even planning on following up? What a jerk.
that's pretty messed up right there. and of course you could have said no. you are you and don't forget that. communication is the absolute key to a relationship. if he does something that makes you unhappy you should say so. otherwise guess what....it'll happen again. just sayin sweetheart. give an inch they take a mile. not to mean be rude or anything but just trying to voice an opinion. if you were to do something he didn't like would he say anything? prolly. chin up chest out be proud! know things aren't going well and it's hard to look on the bright side but if i can do it so can you hun!!
I told him I would be lonely and that I was not happy about it. I can't just say "no" though. That puts all the guilt on me and that is just as bad.
alright yeah....you did give him the hint. ball's in his court with your wrath for a counter serve if you so choose! :D
I'm getting drunk in the bedroom, have already locked the door. He wanted a female free evening? Well he can have a whole female free night, on the couch.
ouch but can't say he didn't ask for it.
Lust and sex are great and all. But, to me, the thing that keeps two people together over the years is how well they take care of each other. Your boyfriend seems to be pretty blatant in not caring.
All the best MTP. I hope everything works out well for you.
If it were me, I would suspect that the "guys' night out" was a deliberate decision he made only after being told that grocery shopping was more important than immediate sex. I had a boyfriend like that once. Wanted it when he wanted it, didn't care when I wanted it, and hated being denied. That shit ended pretty quickly.
He argued that I had turned him down, not just postponed the action. And apparently telling him I would be lonely was not clear enough that I wanted to be with him. After an hour on the couch he came back and apologized and said he was wrong and stupid. I went ahead and forgave him, because I'm too nice and don't like to hold grudges. He seemed to really mean it. I guess that is one of many cons of dating a younger guy with little relationship experience. He has a lot to learn, and I have to be more patient. I am not very good with patience.
Some (most) guys are dumb. You've got to spell it out for us. Hints usually don't work so well. You just need to come right out and say it, or we will miss it entirely.
He argued that I had turned him down, not just postponed the action. And apparently telling him I would be lonely was not clear enough that I wanted to be with him. After an hour on the couch he came back and apologized and said he was wrong and stupid. I went ahead and forgave him, because I'm too nice and don't like to hold grudges. He seemed to really mean it. I guess that is one of many cons of dating a younger guy with little relationship experience. He has a lot to learn, and I have to be more patient. I am not very good with patience.
I don't mean this in a derogatory way, but I think you have a lot to learn too.
You can't expect anyone to read your mind. Saying you'll be lonely just sounds like you want attention for your own sake. If you explain your feelings, that you want to spend time with him because of your rough day, then a caring person will be there for you.
Shutting yourself away and getting drunk is a very immature response, especially to an imagined slight. In my mind, you should apologize for your reaction and work on communicating better.
My wife and I used to struggle greatly with communication. We are much better at it now. And one of the simplest things is to be up front about what we need from each other and why. Also, we never go to sleep with unfinished relationship business.
It is REALLY difficult to be more clear than "I will be lonely tonight...[can I come along]" a bit of the shortened version, but I said all of that. I was not giving a hint and I was not trying to be coy. I told him I was disappointed that he would be all over me, and then tell me a short time later that he was leaving for the evening. The only way to have been more clear would have been to tell him he was not allowed to go. That makes me a bitch and is unfair for me to tell him what to do.
It's not just 'unfair' to tell someone what to do, it's unrealistic. They'll resent you, may take 2 weeks, may take 20 years. My sage old self says that people are going to do what they want to do, and you decide if a continued behavior pattern is going to work for you. You can't change anyone, you can't possibly want someone to be around you just because you said so and they fear your wrath.
I would have been pissed off if someone in my life initiated sex only to be all like "Well, gotta go!" with no forewarning. I wouldn't mind the going part: go, I say...I can watch you leave. However, I might start thinking twice about letting you come back, into my house or into my heart, as convenience dictates.
People need freedom to "do" whatever they're going to do. You can suggest otherwise, and they can acquiesce or not. I think his trying to get sex before he left you in the lurch COULD be chalked up to the "a lot to learn" part, but certainly it is up to YOU to decide, if this behavior continues, if he is really the one for you.
...
My wife and I used to struggle greatly with communication. We are much better at it now. And one of the simplest things is to be up front about what we need from each other and why. Also, we never go to sleep with unfinished relationship business.
This.
Put the word "husband" in there and that could be me talking.
Can you tell us what's making you sad?
Is it bigger than a breadbox?
Grandad has been going downhill quite quickly. Over the last three weeks he's had multiple falls and become unable to get himself drinks or go to the toilet alone because of this. His appetite has reduced greatly and he has become very confused. He's called Mum in the early hours of the morning thinking it's lunchtime, and asked his Carers to put him back to bed thinking it's evening. Between us the family have been round three times a day and the Carers (paid staff) morning and evening.
So following another fall yesterday afternoon, he was admitted for observation at the hospital. So far, so expected - he is 89 at the end of this month and although it's sad to see things slip so quickly it ot a shock.
The upsetting thing is how badly the hospital is set up to cope with elderly patients. I've heard it before, but I hoped it was isolated cases, or something that was being worked on. That doesn't seem to be the case.
Mum went with him to the hospital at 15.30. He was given a temporary bed in a curtained off area of A&E. She stayed with him until a bed was allocated at 22.00. In all that time no-one came to check on him to see if he needed food, drink or a toilet break.
Visiting hours started at 15.00 today. When Mum arrived she found he had no bedside table (for drinks primarily) no water bottle or glass and as he as high sides to the bed he could not get out and has resorted to incontinence. In the three hours Mum was there the only time she saw the Nurse was when she came in with medication. Two assistants came and changed his pads halfway through the visit.
Dinner arrived - hot soup in a full bowl. Given to an 88 year old with Parkinsons. And a full cup of tea - in a cup rather than something with a lid. The food is not delivered to the patient by ward staff, so it's not their fault. It is simply picked up later by the catering staff with no notice taken as to whether it can possibly be consumed by the patient.
Mum washed Grandad and left him with water and an open tin of food supplemtn drink (prescribed by his Doctor for occasional use) with a straw in it. She also shaved him and combed his hair. Everyone is saying, "Well, he's in the best place..." No, he's not. He does not need specific medical attention (tests for infection have come back megative) but he needs care. There is no alternative place until he is assessed, but in the mean time this is a sorry state of affairs.
Grandad was unsure of where he was, and the ward doctor had not been to visit all day. "Perhaps tomorrow" said the Nurse. No-one can help with this of course.
I'm surprised they don't make the visiting hours longer on wards like this. Surely part of the Big Society would be allowing people to ensure their elderly relatives have basic needs taken care of.
Sorry, equally disgruntled and just sad really.
I feel so sad to know that Grandad is there alone tonight, unable to move, go to the toilet
Another death in the family: my older cousin's wife. Too young to die. I think it may have been complications from anorexia. She was always so nice, though I didn't see them that often.
I'm saddened what our minds do to our bodies. I'm sad that so much is placed and programmed into our wanna-be-pretty heads, that we are never enough unless we love ourselves inside and out. I'm sad how many succumb to eating disorders, and I wonder at how some of us manage to escape. But maybe we haven't. Maybe every diet, every lament, every meal just makes it all loom so large. So important. When it's so not. It's so not a part of who "we", each one of us, are. Not really. Not in the grand scheme.
Ladies, love yourselves. Love every wrinkle and roll and bone and freckle and toe and every speck of your individual mind. We are all different, and I wish we would celebrate our "selves" instead of wishing we looked like someone else. I wish we could all stand and say "I am beautiful, and I don't need you to think so to know it!" I'm guilty, too. :(
Another death in the family: my older cousin's wife. Too young to die. I think it may have been complications from anorexia. She was always so nice, though I didn't see them that often.
I'm saddened what our minds do to our bodies. I'm sad that so much is placed and programmed into our wanna-be-pretty heads, that we are never enough unless we love ourselves inside and out. I'm sad how many succumb to eating disorders, and I wonder at how some of us manage to escape. But maybe we haven't. Maybe every diet, every lament, every meal just makes it all loom so large. So important. When it's so not. It's so not a part of who "we", each one of us, are. Not really. Not in the grand scheme.
Ladies, love yourselves. Love every wrinkle and roll and bone and freckle and toe and every speck of your individual mind. We are all different, and I wish we would celebrate our "selves" instead of wishing we looked like someone else. I wish we could all stand and say "I am beautiful, and I don't need you to think so to know it!" I'm guilty, too. :(
I'm sorry for the loss S123.
It is a really sad thing how many of us struggle with image and feeling good about ourselves.
SG: I'm sorry for your granddad, I hope he gets out of there soon!
Sundae - I am so sorry to hear about your Grandpa. I am afraid, truth to tell, there is nowhere equipped or staffed for his needs. My mum (who also had Parkinson's) spent several weeks in a hospital that was specifically a place for old people's mental state to be assessed, but because she was there "temporarily" there were no diversions so one day was identical to the next. She wanted to walk, for exercise, but because she was unsteady on her feet she was constantly told to sit down, and at one point restrained in a chair. She really withdrew there, and went downhill very fast. The goods news is that when she moved from there to a residential home she improved vastly. But in the meanwhile, it was the worst summer of her (and my) life.
Thank you mtp. That was very kind of you to take the time to say. You're a good person.
We jump all over people who dare diss the naked people, but when someone puts their heart out there in the form of dead kitties or dead or ailing relatives, there isn't a lot to be said, right?
Oh Shaw that is so sad. I am sorry for you loss.
SG getting old sucks and watching this happen to our relatives is not easy. Sending you and Shaw a {{{{{{{HUG}}}}}}}}}}
I'm sorry for your loss Shaw and for what you're going through Sundae.
Virtual hugs for both of you.
Another death in the family: my older cousin's wife. Too young to die. I think it may have been complications from anorexia. She was always so nice, though I didn't see them that often.
I'm saddened what our minds do to our bodies. I'm sad that so much is placed and programmed into our wanna-be-pretty heads, that we are never enough unless we love ourselves inside and out. I'm sad how many succumb to eating disorders, and I wonder at how some of us manage to escape. But maybe we haven't. Maybe every diet, every lament, every meal just makes it all loom so large. So important. When it's so not. It's so not a part of who "we", each one of us, are. Not really. Not in the grand scheme.
Ladies, and gentlemen love yourselves. Love every wrinkle and roll and bone and freckle and toe and every speck of your individual mind. We are all different, and I wish we would celebrate our "selves" instead of wishing we looked like someone else. I wish we could all stand and say "I am beautiful, and I don't need you to think so to know it!" I'm guilty, too. :(
[YOUTUBE]Xz1HFv4rnOs[/YOUTUBE]
so sorry to hear about your loss Shawnee.
And SG - Thank god your mom is there to be with him. :comfort:
sad days.
Shaw, I'm sorry.
I've been close to people with eating disorders, but haven't lost one yet.
I do know the damage people put their bodies through though, and that the complications are far-reaching.
I came back to say things are far better with Grandad and thanks for the kind words.
He's part of a long-ish post about school in the Happy Thread. Lots to be thankful for today.
I'm not quite sure why everything is bringing me down today, it just seems to be.
Skimmed a letter form one of Mum's friend's yesterday. I wasn't being particularly nosey - it was on the kitchen table and I know her reasonably well. She lives in Spain now, so they only correspond by letter.
Anyway, the PS was - Hope C has finally sorted herself out?
Nice.
It wasn't even a proper question.
And then today I fond one of the cats had peed in the downstairs toilet.
Not only is this automatically Diz, but it is because he tray is dirty (it wasn't). Also, we pay this backwards and the problems we had with one of the cats peeing in the living room last summer was also Diz. Despite the fact the problem ended when we got HER cat some more Feliway for the bedroom.
Oh and we know all this because Maureen told her I don't clean his tray out enough. Because her cat won't go in a tray he has used once.
Despite the fact that Diz is not benji. Despite the fact that neither Mum nor Maureen know how often I empty the tray (Mum made a comment about the smell in the first couple of months so I never do it when she is around). Despite the fact I use a very different litter, because I have to sleep in the same room as the litter tray.
It's not the fact of the matter. It's the fact that Mum had a conversation about my cat with someone who knows nothing about the set-up and made her decision based on that.
Urgh. Her bloody friends.
And this whole thing with Grandad and Mum being a cross between Mother Theresa and The Lady of the Manor. Yes - there were BIG problems to start with. No he was NOT getting the help he needed and it was a dreadful situation. But now she's just finding things to get worked up about. She then phones up all her horrible friends to tell them what she is having to do, and how hard it is on her, and how no-one is giving her any support as usual. She screamed that at Dad the other night after having a particularly harrowing call telling someone how this would see her into an early grave and she didn't know how she was going to cope much longer.
Her friends have told her to go to the doctor and get some help. What help they can really give a furiously angry and frustrated woman I don't know, because that is her main problem only she won't acknowledge it.
Sigh. I'm doing the same to her as she is to me I suppose. Bitching about how awful she is behind her back. But I can't bear to provoke another incident like we had at Christmas.
I just wish she'd stop taking it all on herself. She does get a kind of low down pleasure from it. She doesn't have to go and feed him every night. The nurses will do that, they know about that. And she knows I will do it for her - I'm doing so tonight. If she really can't trust me to get it right, how come she's not going to Mass on Sunday instead of Saturday so I don't have to? Oh I know - because she knows damn well I've offered to help and can do - as has my sister - but she needs to maintain the fiction that she is all alone in this.
I do feel sorry for her - honestly I do. It's a horrible thing to go through. But I can't break through the shell that she's put up around her vulnerability. I never have been able to. All I get to do is try to make sensible suggestions. And that would work FAR better if I wasn't living here.
Yeah, so back to the top.
I know perfectly well why I'm unhappy today.
Soon, Sundae. Real job. Income. Deposit. Rent. Own place. Couple of months. Soon, really.
Soon, Sundae. Real job. Income. Deposit. Rent. Own place. Couple of months. Soon, really.
I second this. Girl, when you come out on the other side completely you are going to feel so good.
And you are more than 'sorted out'...you are YOU. What the heck more could any of us ask for (except the gross people, they don't count.) :lol:
Hang in there. You are loved.
Yeah, sorry for the bitching, people.
I was venting.
I can see the other side.
I told her earlier that she doesn't need to have a reason to take a night "off" and I'll feed him any time, and she really seemed to take that onboard and appreciate it.
Why are you sorry? :(
Stop that.
Venting is good. No, really. It is.
My hp laptop won't turn on, my desk top is being crazy and the only webpage that will load right now is the cellar.
So I guess it isn't all bad
Convincing the cellar that I exist
Hebe trying to choose her high school. She needs to choose the new school, not the one she's zoned for. But it's hard to break away from the "prescribed path". She's done all the research and investigation she can. She has to turn in the acceptance by Friday, I thought it would be better to push the decision tonight so then it's a done deal, but she won't/can't/went to bed in tears :(
Yesterday and earlier today, it became apparent that in order to pursue her passion for languages, she needs to drop orchestra -which we'd always assumed was a given. Now the decision is made, it's so obviously the right one in hindsight and she's much happier about her course choices. i was hoping for the same thing for her school choices.
It's such a scary prospect for most kids going into high school, especially if they're not going to the same school as all their friends.
I hope she can come up with a decision she feels good about.
My boys didn't have a choice of high schools. They just get to go to the local one. Not a hard decision for us. lol
right. there are two schools that have a lottery to get into here. she got into one. The brand spanking new one with awesome facities and a slightly more open program and young and/or enthusiastic teachers who were headhunted....... If you don't apply or don't get in, you go to the one you're zoned for, I think she was hoping to miss both so no decision. It's mostly hard for her because (a) she finally found a group of friends she really clicks with (through swim team). they will be going to the local school. but doing different classes. (b) because she knows more of the swimteam at the zoned school and it's the school we had mentally prepared for.
The peer group are very important to teenagers and tweens. I know my boys have trouble with some decisions because of that, but in the end they're usually happy either way. Sometimes meeting a new group of peers can be pretty good, but yeah, scary.
The local high school for my boys was full of new kids. Especially Aden as he hadn't been to the primary school down here.
this is three kids out of thousands and she'll still see them at non-school swim team. She's in a different school to them now. Friends are cool, but not the best basis for a high-school education decision. My best friend from high school and the only one I'm still regularly in touch with -who came to visit me in the US- was my "arch-enemy" in elementary school.
But it's still hard.
....and this group of peers is a group of "misfits" -bright confident young people who won't let their academic prowess put them in the corner but are also nerdy geeks uninterested in fashion and Bieber and are not afraid to blaze their own trail. :lol:
But it's still hard
Naa TOO Easy !!
I vote for the shiney new school
But it's still hard
Naa TOO Easy !!
I vote for the shiney new school
yeah, beest and I do too. But we really want her to choose it rather than us forcing her into it. But I suspect we will railroad her if she makes the wrong choice. We just don't want it to be that way. It needs to come from her.
If she rejects shiny new school, she can't change he mind and go there. If she hates shiny new school, she can ditch it and go to zoned school. She's adamant that she'll hate changing more than being in the wrong school.....
13y-olds. Who'd have 'em? What a horrible point in their life to inflict their first major life decision. it's like Jekyl and Hyde on Speed.
No offence Zippy, but you wouldn't be the first person I'd turn to for advice about choosing a school. ;)
I think you're right, though.
I totally trust zippy's judgment and we've all met him ...and he's Hebe's hero because he cooks great steaks...wait, we could be onto something here......
If I was choosing a shotgun, a ride on mower, or an industrial scale, heck yeah I'd ask him. For choosing a school I'd find someone who can spell, and maybe has a postgraduate degree, like Monster or Beast.
On the other hand, if his advice could push Hebe in what is obviously the right direction, use it.
That hard fall on the ice I took a while back appears to have wrecked my back.... go me!
Sometimes you shouldn't judge a book by the cover, ZG. Zippy's smarter than the average bear. He just doesn't waste brainpower on spelling. ;)
Decision made, daughter still not happy. Hoping that will change as she gets used to the idea. Shiny new high school here we come and we didn't really have to railroad her although I'm sure she feels that way right now...
@ Griff: I was just reading in TIME about chronic pain...a large percentage from back problems. I hope you heal. It can take just one incident to vastly change our lives. I have faith that you will feel better soon. :)
@ monster: your daughter, making these kinds of decisions, will benefit so much later in life as far as problem-solving. It has to be so hard to see her conflicted, but damn good parenting on your part. You and beest are raising an independent young lady. Good on you.
That sucks Griff. I can see something like that happening to me, and it worries me. I've been wondering lately if I should do pilates or something to strengthen my core. Preventive exercises, you know?
That hard fall on the ice I took a while back appears to have wrecked my back.... go me!
Yow. Are you getting PT? Is it fixable? Yes, glatt, definitely do core strength exercises. My back is bothering me again and I know it's because I've been neglecting the exercises. Even if you do knacker your back with some accident -like falling on the ice, having core strength will help your recovery. I have experience of this from the wrong side of core strength.
sorry to hear that, bro. Rest, ice, more ice, some movies, more ice, some nsaids, some rest, and have Pete stroke your head saying "Poor little bunny"
If it keeps up you'll have to read John Sarno's book about back pain.
That sucks Griff. I can see something like that happening to me, and it worries me. I've been wondering lately if I should do pilates or something to strengthen my core. Preventive exercises, you know?
Mr. Clod's employer just started offering a yoga class once a week at the office, from 5PM to 6PM. I badgered him into doing it, but he said he was going to drop out unless there was at least one other male in the group. Turned out on the first day that it was 75% guys. I think most middle-aged men realize it's important, but don't have a good environment to do it in. But seriously, what can it cost to bring in a yoga instructor for an hour? $50? A great investment from the employer's standpoint.
Yoga is the bomb. I went to my first post surgery class the other day. It is f ing great
I'm assuming this is a minor thing as it is incrementally better than it was. I'm applying heat right now and will do my stretches then ice and ibuprophen and off to bed. I'm planning to give it major rest this weekend... maybe I'll see the doc about pt if it is still kicking my ass next week. My pt friend said something about camel toe yoga maybe I'll google that. ;)
Maybe it's PMS, but I'm feeling a bit pissed off that I have to wash dishes, wipe the kitchen counters, and mop the kitchen floor everyday. :mad:
i know what you mean and feel your pain. i cook and clean here too.
Me too. Well, not everyday. Probably should though.
Me too. Well, not everyday. Probably should though.
Does anyone get pissed off with you if don't do this though?
Only me.
Which just makes it worse, I think. :(
Only me.
Which just makes it worse, I think. :(
You've got to be gentle with yourself, since the world surely won't.
I am pissed because I have to do it at other people's houses and then come home and do it at mine.
When I worked in the restaurant world I often wondered if the dishwasher ate off paper plates at home or if he washed the dishes at home too. Was it chump change to him or another straw on the camel's back?
You've got to be gentle with yourself, since the world surely won't.
A great excuse when judiciously applied.
Where I am currently is great. Part of the service is daily room cleaning. :)
When I worked in the restaurant world I often wondered if the dishwasher ate off paper plates at home or if he washed the dishes at home too. Was it chump change to him or another straw on the camel's back?
People ask me that all the time. My answer is "I spend more time cleaning my own house than any other." I figure if I am not trying to get work done as quickly as possible, I am going to take my time and be deliberate about it. The client probably won't see some of the finer details, but I sure as hell will.
I charge by the job and not by the hour. 100 bucks is 100 bucks, whether it takes me 5 hours or 3. Motivates me to work quickly and get home.
If you heard the person on the other side of the cubicle gasp and say "OH MY GOD OUCH" would you ask them if they were OK?
Apparently my buddy cube neighbor wouldn't. Such a phony nice guy.
I'm just bleeding to death over here, dude. Fuckhead.
So, are you okay, Shawnee? :thepain:
My feelings hurt worse than my finger, but my finger is throbbing something fierce.
It's a long story. Suffice to say I now see why they used bamboo shoots under your fingernails as a form of torture.
Next time he gets all suddenly cheery when a boss is nearby then wants to bitch and moan to me about how put upon he is? Forget it. I have all the friends I need, if someone dies I might give him a call. Self-centered fuck. Common human decency would seem to dictate a "hey, you OK over there?" I know I've shown such compassion to my coworkers.
Human beings suck.
But thanks Sam. Sometimes we just want to know someone gives a crap. :o
My feelings hurt worse than my finger, but my finger is throbbing something fierce. ...
I'm sorry about ur fingr ... :(
me too! was it one of those annoying cuts like on the tip of your finger? i accidentally poked the pocket razor when working in the downstairs bathroom and it nagged at me for a good solid week, kept hitting it on whatever i was working on or with.....
I have all the friends I need, if someone dies I might give him a call.
Reminded me of this from Charade - one of my favorite films.
Reggie Lampert: I already know an awful lot of people and until one of them dies I couldn't possibly meet anyone else.
Peter Joshua: Well, if anyone goes on the critical list, let me know.
A sharp metal edge (troubleshooting my broken cell phone with motorola online which ended up not even freaking working anyway) from the access to my cell phone battery (because goddam motorola online said it couldn't detect my phone from the USB port though my phone said it was there and motorola said to uninstall the battery blah blah blah which didn't freaking work either)...the cover is made of a fucking ginsu knife...I slipped hard and it ran up under my nail. Like I said, bamboo shoots. The kind of instant searing pain that makes you almost faint.
I just all around don't feel well, which doesn't help. I should go home. :(
We frequently loan heifers to be shown by kids in 4 H. Have loaned to this family before no problem. Nice heifer I bought last fall for the pedigree and somehow got a nail in her foot. They waited a long time to bring in a vet and waited a week to tell me. She is ruined for show ok so what, but now there are 3 choices soak her foot every day for 3 weeks, and then maybe still have to cut off her toe, and then maybe still she is not healthy and has to . . well you get the picture. Why TF don't people tell you this stuff right away? WTF :mad:
And another fucking thing: if he can sit over there and play tappy tap with his pen and she can sit on the other side of me chewing ice or slurping gum, I can listen to the radio live.
In fact, I'm about to become more annoying than anyone ever could have fucking imagined.
yeah, I should go home.
dang hun. sorry about that, those are the worst. my dad was a doctor so i;m qualified for this: take two six packs of beer and pm me in the morning! :p:
Shaw so sorry about your finger :( oh wait this is teh cellar I'm NOT sorry about ur finger? :confused:
This gets better: I walked up front and he was up talking to a lady up there, and started stammering and changing the conversation as I walked up. Then I saw her glance at me...so obvious.
People are all phony liars. No more covering his fat ass.
And another fucking thing: if he can sit over there and play tappy tap with his pen and she can sit on the other side of me chewing ice or slurping gum, I can listen to the radio live. I was told that I could listen to the radio at a reasonable volume from nine to eleven, I told Bill that if Sandra is going to listen to her headphones while she's filing then I should be able to listen to the radio while I'm collating so I don't see why I should have to turn down the radio because I enjoy listening at a reasonable volume from nine to eleven.
And I said, I don't care if they lay me off either, because I told, I told Bill that if they move my desk one more time, then, then I'm, I'm quitting, I'm going to quit. And, and I told Don too, because they've moved my desk four times already this year, and I used to be over by the window, and I could see the squirrels, and they were married, but then, they switched from the Swingline to the Boston stapler, but I kept my Swingline stapler because it didn't bind up as much, and I kept the staples for the Swingline stapler and it's not okay because if they take my stapler then I'll set the building on fire...
In fact, I'm about to become more annoying than anyone ever could have fucking imagined.
yeah, I should go home.
Very funny mudderplucker.
It's the normal thing: fat guy who got made fun of all through HS can only feel better about his crappy existence by making fun of people who are better than him.
Boy am I tired of all the losers using me as their springboard to a false sense of belonging. Guess what? You still suck and no one really likes you: just like-minded people who also gossip and run people down in order to think they're not the disgusting unlikeable pigs they really are. And they'll stab you back, but I won't be here to pick up your sad little pieces. Not any more.
Crown prep. Horrible. Over now. Great. But hungry and mouth still numb.
I'm a wimp in this field. I'm paranoid about my teeth. Achilles' Heel = Monster's Teeth. I hate all this business. But the crown needed doing so the tooth won't decay further. So as soon as the medical flex-spending plan kicked in, I sucked it up and made the appt. And I went. But I don't like it. I'm not afraid it will hurt, I'm not afraid of the drill, I'm just afraid of losing my teeth. I'm afraid they'll start drilling and say "oh, this is worse that I thought....". And I told them that, so they know. I've been going there a few years.
I was a big brave girl and doing really well until she said OK, do you want to look at the temporary crown? It's going to look a little strange and metallic because I put a really strong one in as I know you're worried about it falling out. Heart sinks. Tongue goes to spot. Doesn't even feel like a fucking tooth. Is not tooth shaped. Hello? I told you about my fear about it falling out like the last one did because I DO NOT WANT TO SEE ANYTHING THAT DOESN'T LOOK LIKE A TOOTH. Monster bursts into tears after all that braveness. Dentist replaces terminator-cyborg temp with regular white one. Monster much happier but really? Which part of the "I want to be ably to deny there's anything wrong with the tooth" did she miss? Yes, I really said that. I may be a wuss, but I'm up front about it.
Very funny mudderplucker.
c'mon, that was full of humorousnessism
c'mon, that was full of humorousnessism
And then, Shawnee chuckled. ;)
Achilles' Heel = Monster's Teeth.
Are Monster's Teeth perhaps like Hydra's Teeth? Could you sow them in the carpark and create more of yourself? Might help with your whirlwind schedule.
My temp bridge looked horrible. The perm ones were great, then they broke. Then they replaced them. Then my dentist died. Turns out one of the nubs that anchors the bridge has a chronic infection that may or may not cause problems. It might be like when I was a kid and they had to insert the needle directly into the hole to the nerve of my root canal.
My teeth have been my heel too. Mom calls me The Million Dollar Mouth.
You seriously need to start dating a dentist.
I was thinking about dating my dead dentist, before he was dead. I found out he was single, my age, cuter than hell, and nice. But he done died. ;)
Less trouble when they're dead.....
Well the numbness is just about gone, so I ate a Packzi and got fatter.
While I was waiting for the anaesthetic to kick in, they forced me to watch Ellen and the commercials were on. There was a buy one get one free deal on at a plastic surgery clinic and as the offer flashed up, boobs were shown in the back ground. Srsly, with a few exceptions, who's going to buy one tit?
I'd have liposuction/tummy tuck. Is that two procedures? Have I already used up my "free"? Of course I'd never actually have elective surgery, but you know... I'd love to be thinner, I'm failing using the willpower/diet/exercise approach. badly :(
I know what you mean. I think if I could just take a machete and slice my belly off, then maybe glue it back together...
I'll do really great then fail, then fail then do really great.
I think we're forgetting something: we're awesome just as we are. :)
I was thinking about dating my dead dentist, before he was dead.
It's the old Buddy Hackett joke.
A woman goes to the dentist and he tells her she needs a root canal.
"Oh no a root canal! The last one I had was terrible. I'd rather go through childbirth again!"
"Well make up your mind, lady, I've got to adjust the chair."
And now I've wasted the whole day feeling sorry for myself.
That helps, make yourself feel bad for feeling badly.
I've felt sorry for myself all day but I've still accomplished some stuff. Now THAT'S tenacity. ;)
That helps, make yourself feel bad for feeling badly.
Yup, that's me all over. hmph.
Peas in a pod, it seems.
Whirled Peas.
Just what I wished for.....
And then, Shawnee chuckled. ;)
I like when Shawnee chuckles ...
I like when Shawnee chuckles ...
..because you know you'll soon be receiving a supply of hobo offal for your haggis business?
I like when Shawnee chuckles ...
Chuck likes it too! :D
..because you know you'll soon be receiving a supply of hobo offal for your haggis business?
Which got me thinking. We should be prepared to start a post-apocalyptic restaurant chain: The Offal House.
Zombies be stumblin' in around 2:30 a.m. after the bars close (monster, I bet a lot of them hang out at Z's) saying "I'm so hungry I could eat some whores!"
I just got an email from Hector's Hockey team. Apparently it was naive of me not to realise that he would be expected to take a day off school to play in a local tournament.
Your priorities are obviously out of whack.
It's a fucking house team and the season is over. Now I get to be the bad guy if I say no. He's their only goalie, no-one else has been in net all year because he's never missed a game. He's looking forward to the tourney. but it's not OK. you don't just dump school. I'm in shock. And beest's too busy at work to discuss it now. Which is not his fault, but I don't know what to do
My niece was invited to play on a travelling softball team that would keep her away from home, sometimes school, sometimes overnight. She's freaking 10 years old. Brother was like "yeah, no. I know you love softball and are very good at it, but that's unreasonable."
Why would they schedule tournaments like that? Isn't that what weekends are for?
(Side note: cubey guy is playing pouty face with me today. Whuddever. It'll give him more to talk about. If people aren't talking about you, I guess you're boring.) ;)
That's a really hard one. It's nuts though. Who schedules a tournament for house teams during a school day? WTF? Are other parents OK with taking their kids out of school for this? Games should be on weekends or after school.
I'd be inclined to say NO. Even if it does screw it up for everyone else. Who can argue with you when you say school is more important? That's not a position anyone can argue against.
I asked the team manager about the other kids. he hasn't replied yet. he's a really nice sensible intelligent guy. We're the only rookie family. We already did one tourney, our Friday game was 6pm. We did have to take time off school, but only because it was so far away. And Hector was a complete noob in the net, so anyone could've filled his spot, there was no real pressure to go. This one has two Friday games -8am and 2pm. wtf? it's only 45 minutes away. I don't think it was unreasonable of me to assume the Friday games would be evening ones. But apparently it was. I don't know what in the hell to do.
In the big scheme of things I doubt he'll miss anything so critical at school it cannot be made up in an hour or two of studying. Of course, unless he is planning on an NHL career I doubt missing a game is going to be brought up with his therapist 15 years hence. It's probably gonna be something about how you cut his toast into triangles that one time when you knew he wanted rectangles...
I'm with foot--I think it's unlikely he'll really miss much on this one day of school, it's more about the precedent. This can't be a regular pattern, and if you let him go, he may think he gets to go to the next one and the next one, and the hockey coach will continue to schedule things during weekdays because kids keep coming to them.
I guess if it were me, I'd let him go to this one because of the short notice, but state very clearly to the coach that he will not be attending any more games during school hours. If he schedules them in the future, he will know he is doing it without a goalie.
I think we're going to have to roll with it. I checked with the teacher and he won't miss anything huge. It's the big finale of the season, then the team is disbanded. Next year, I'll know to mention up front that we don't do days off willy-nilly and maybe next year he'll have a back-up.
Asking around, it's not unusual, I think it must be my Brit showing that makes me so horrified (no days off school unless you're practically dead), because I don't consider school to be the be-all-and-end-all of education, so why did this horrify me so much? Being part of a sports team is also educational in its way. And apparently we could visit the nearby holocaust museum between the 8am and 2pm Friday games..... although there are no guided tours on Fridays... unless it's a Jewish Holiday -Purim is coming up....
I told the manager that for future reference he really ought to make sure that newbie families know this up front when they agree to a tourney. Maybe it's just because Hector is so awesome, they forget he's a rookie....
We had to be practically dead to take off school, too.
I think it must be my Brit showing that makes me so horrified (no days off school unless you're practically dead), because I don't consider school to be the be-all-and-end-all of education, so why did this horrify me so much?
It's normal to be horrified. School is not the be all end all, but at the same time, you have been sending the message to your kids that school is important. To skip school for a game is diluting that message. You try to be consistent so the kids know what to expect, and then somebody else out there is forcing you to be all fickle in your message by putting you in this position. I'd be horrified too. But the bottom line is that he won't miss much in school that day, and if the teacher is OK with it, it's all good.
I wouldn't present it as skipping school -he loves school. I'd present it a choice that needs to be made (although his choice is obvious). Sure, if you pick school as part of your education, then school is important and shouldn't be skipped, but sometimes there are things that -whilst they may be not a "higher priority"- can offer different experiences which are also valuable. He will be expected to do the work that is missed. Fortunately, Friday is not a busy day for him because he is a hard worker/advance-planner and so is usually all done with the weekly tasks and has only the novel work to complete that day.
Now that I've calmed down/got used to the idea, it's more that it didn't occur to the Manager to mention this when he brought up the tourney and to check that everyone was OK with it, than the actual missing school that horrifies me. But I'll get over it. And I bet he won't do it again, either. I suspect he's appropriately upset by his oversight.
One of the monks at the monastery I lived at used to say, "We make our plans and then life intrudes."
Ifn ya Aint got a Plan,
Ya Cant change it
I'm a wimp in this field. . . . Monster bursts into tears after all that braveness.
I cry at the dentist a lot, and I think this is entirely within the range of normal reactions and not wimpy. I'm a big cryer--any strong emotion makes me leak. But, I think there's something just very horrible and scary about someone messing with your head like that. Goes straight to the emotion centers of the brain.
right @ zippy.
swim meet tonight. nearly there, pool almost in sight ('cept for the fog)..... road closed, downed powerlines. Detour took 50 minutes. we called people behind us so they were able to take earlier detours -they all got there before us. They delayed the meet and fortunately i was transporting swimmers from one practice to another meet so they already were "warmed up".
...on the plus side, seemed to work for Hebe -personal bests in both individuals, taking 2nd in the 50 and 1st in the 200 free -and that was an exciting race -from 3rd, she sprinted the last lap to touch first, by only hundredths of a second in a two and a half minute race.
Then hampered by fog on the way home. but we're home.
I cry at the dentist a lot, and I think this is entirely within the range of normal reactions and not wimpy. I'm a big cryer--any strong emotion makes me leak. But, I think there's something just very horrible and scary about someone messing with your head like that. Goes straight to the emotion centers of the brain.
y'see, I don't cry much, so it really scares people when I do. I don't think I cried at all once I left childhood until I had children of my own. that totally fucks with your tear duct function, doesn't it?
wouldn't know--I'm like a leaky bucket.
just meant to say about the dentist thing--it's such a personal violation.
wouldn't know--I'm like a leaky bucket.
just meant to say about the dentist thing--it's such a personal violation.
There is something surprising and fascinating to me about this since you electively pierce and tattoo yourself -- activities, I am told, that are not pain free and usually require another person to perform.
Apart from one being healthcare/hygiene and the others being aesthetic what is it that is different about the experience to you?
I would think it's to do with it being elective. You choose what piercings/tats to have where, (or not to have any at all), dentists tell you what needs to be done to protect your teeth and you really, generally have to trust their judgement, even though you know they're making money from you so are perfectly positioned to lie and do unnecessary work. I have no fear of needles or pain, or even the drill. If I wanted a tat, I'd have no problem with getting it.
they're making money from you so are perfectly positioned to lie and do unnecessary work.
I've come across dentists like that when first moving to an area and looking for a new dentist. If a new dentist is telling you that your teeth are on the verge of falling out and you need all this expensive work, when your old dentists always said you had good teeth, it's a good sign the new dentist is a greedy liar.
Dentists, like most services, should be chosen based on reasoned recommendations from trusted sources. (Not trying to lecture you, but this one guy I went to years ago when I joined a new plan was just amazing in the unnecessary crap he was doing.)
It's true that I have a different relationship to pain after getting my body art done, but having someone mess with your head/mouth for prolonged periods of time (as opposed to the few seconds a piercing takes) is a different matter.
@ glatt
right. And this dentist was like this. Or felt like this. But beest recommended them to me (and now to everyone else at his work) But it turns out I'm a difficult patient (!), and my previous dentist (the one I picked before I knew anyone to recommend a dentist to me) was just so bad they couldn't be bothered to persuade me that work needed doing and let my rot progress...
Sigh. No good deed goes unpunished.
About three weeks ago, a woman asked for a recommendation for a PPCD class. Her home elementary school doesn't run one, so she was being given a choice between the next two closest schools, one of which was ours. I enthusiastically recommended our awesome teacher and state-recognized program. She thanked me, and chose it.
So now, I go to Minifobette's first official evaluation meeting that precedes her entry into the class on her third birthday in April. And I am informed that, while she obviously qualifies, our school's program is now full. She's guaranteed a spot in the Fall (duh, my own son is the one vacating his spot,) but unless a kid miraculously drops out in the next couple of weeks, she's screwed for this year. (We do have the choice to go to a not-nearly-as-good school, but that's not gonna happen.)
Fuck Arthritis.
and his wife, Sist
Fuck Arthritis.
agreed. mine is always nagging me. some days are worse than others but you know what i mean....aleve is a wonderful thing. then again so is naproxin. pure aleve that is....
and his wife, Sist
eh?
Sistitis.
Cystitis.
The nun fainted.
So apparently asking someone to stop coming to my work, due to being rude to my staff, is not great idea. Kid, about 18-19, threatened to kill me, showed me his knife, threatened to burn the store down, break all the windows, kill all my staff... He then threatened to "hunt me down and kill me" and flashed the knife at me. I walked calmly back into my store, hit the panic button, then went back out, to make sure he did not go after any of the .. oh I don't know, 30-50 people on a tour bus, coming into the hotel! As he was walking toward them, he was yelling death threats to me and my staff. My boss, hearing the alarm, but having no idea what was going on, started walking towards us. The guy lost it, reached for the knife and then tried to go at my boss with the knife. The guy lunged 3 times at my boss, then turned to me... I said, " you really don't want to do that, you should just leave before the police get here" He turned and ran off our property. We called the cops, blah blah blah. They caught the guy several hours later. Then we had to go down to the police station tonight and do a photo line up. I picked the guy out right away. My boss, was not so sure. He said he was too busy watching me, and figuring out if the guy was stealing from us, (the only other time I have ever used the panic alarm is when I've been robbed) and watching me to see if I was ok. After the knife was produced, my boss was more concernd with keeping us calm and safe, as well as all the looky loos watching...SIGH. So while I nailed the photo ID, because my boss was not allowed to go back and look at them again, he is not sure he got it right. bah... Stressful day!
A recap of my last 8 months? I know you didn't ask, but here you go.
After spending my entire post-military adult life in sales/consulting I closed down my company and decided that high end potential and fantastic months were less valuable than consistant predictable life. I took a position with a very large corporation in a non-sales capacity. I spent a little over 6 months on a project that you've all seen in the news, and without tooting my own horn too much... I fucking rocked it. I knocked it out of the park. Actually my whole department blew the expectations straight out of the water and I blew the department averages into unrecognizeable smithereens. Woohoo, I rule!
What's that you say? my reward for doing more than you asked is to get laid off? Why? Did I not do more than you asked? Did I disappoint in some way? Oooh. I see. I have less seniority than the 4 employees who are literally on final written warning for being lazy and incompetent. I understand. Thanks for your letter of recommendation. The hour and a half notice you gave me that I was unemployed was more than I could have possibly asked for. Fuck you sideways.
And that has been among my top 25% positive experiences of the last 6 months.
Sorry to hear, Lookout. They'll be sorry when you're gone, though. Hope you find something good soon.
Goddamn, man. I'm so sorry things are shit right now. I'm glad you came to share with us, though. I've been wondering how you are. Wish it had been better news, though. :(
Shit shitterroo Lookout. Very sorry to hear that.
Lookout, that is truly effed. Sorry to hear that but I know you will come into something better.
fuckity fuck fer fucks sake.
Glad yer safe jay !!
That Sucks BAD lookout !!!
I woulda pissed my pants Jay! Glad no one got hurt and he was caught.
Lookout, that really sucks. I hope you get a better opportunity and can rub it in their faces.
I am sorry, lookout. :( Take your rockin ass to a company that will appreciate it. Don't let it get you down...hubs has been through some unfair layoffs like that and I know how it can get a person in a negative mindset. I wish you the best of luck in finding something new.
Lookout, move to PA and market yourself to folks getting gas checks. I know a guy who can get you a token presence on teh webz and our youth soccer needs a kick in the pants.
That sounds like a great plan with only a couple minor flaws. Mrs L would shoot me if I told her we were moving somewhere cold and I'm allergic to the northeast.
I've had 3 good interviews for good positions in the last 2 days so say a prayer, keep your fingers crossed, or whatever is your style.
That sounds like a great plan with only a couple minor flaws. Mrs L would shoot me if I told her we were moving somewhere cold and I'm allergic to the northeast.
I've had 3 good interviews for good positions in the last 2 days so say a prayer, keep your fingers crossed, or whatever is your style.
Good luck!
Feeling bad for my sister, not myself. She HATES her job, and still doesn't have a good handle on the rheumatoid arthritis. Her hubby is planning on going back to school full time for his bachelors in nursing. Poor thing kinda hopes he won't get admitted (although his grades are really good.) The reason being, is that means she'll be the sole income bringer, and she's just too stressed for it. She's a high school teach, is hoping to maybe come up with a plan over the summer to get her out of it. She's nervous though, and I can't blame her. Currently administration is all over her to get kids to pass Algebra 1, even though they didn't pass any of their previous math classes and shouldn't have even been passed along to Algebra 1. Our education system is such fail.
My mom went on vacation to visit her mom in Florida and I got a text halfway through my birthday that she was in the ER for appendicitis.
I'm not sure why it bothers me so much... she's doing ok now and will be healed up enough for a bus trip later this week according to the doc. I'm not sure if it's the fact that my mom is starting to fall apart, or that she's doing it 3000 miles away from me that has been bothering me the most.
Appendicitis is not an age related thing, a lot of people have that issue at a youngish age. Don't go and start worrying that she is falling apart! *hugs*
I lost my appendix in my mid 30's. One night it just decided "No Mas."
I had the surgery and a week later I was back to work - No issues since.
She'll be fine.
I'm 42 and I still have my appendix. Nearly everyone in my family still have it.
Appendicitis is usually due to infection. I know a kid who had to have his out at age 7. It can be very serious if left untreated, so it's good she got it taken care of, but otherwise, you shouldn't worry too much.
It's not JUST the appendicitis...
When I started my freshman year of college she was diagnosed with diabetes... no big surprise as it runs in my family.
Then she went to the doctor and they found that she had a cyst the size of an avocado in her ovary... she decided to have it removed and they gave her a hysterectomy for good measure as well.
The diabetes was unable to be controlled by eating healthy and taking medication no matter how much tweaking was done to her routine or process and she was looking at dialysis for her kidneys within three to five years... so she started the path to gastric bypass surgery.
Once in the program they find out she has a malfunctioning gallbladder, so during the surgery they yank that sucker out too for good measure.
She gets the gastric bypass and recovers from that which helps with her blood pressure problems (oh I didn't mention those, well she has blood pressure problems too) and helps with the diabetes so she is down to one shot a day instead of three shots and two pills.
A year or so later they tell her that the diabetes isn't going to go away as it sometimes does with gastric patients and they will have to up her meds a bit.
Then her appendix burst while she's on vacation.
All of these things individually don't mean much, and no, not all of them have to do with age... but she's running out of nonessential body parts to get rid of.
It's not JUST the appendicitis...
When I started my freshman year of college she was diagnosed with diabetes... no big surprise as it runs in my family.
Then she went to the doctor and they found that she had a cyst the size of an avocado in her ovary... she decided to have it removed and they gave her a hysterectomy for good measure as well.
The diabetes was unable to be controlled by eating healthy and taking medication no matter how much tweaking was done to her routine or process and she was looking at dialysis for her kidneys within three to five years... so she started the path to gastric bypass surgery.
Once in the program they find out she has a malfunctioning gallbladder, so during the surgery they yank that sucker out too for good measure.
She gets the gastric bypass and recovers from that which helps with her blood pressure problems (oh I didn't mention those, well she has blood pressure problems too) and helps with the diabetes so she is down to one shot a day instead of three shots and two pills.
A year or so later they tell her that the diabetes isn't going to go away as it sometimes does with gastric patients and they will have to up her meds a bit.
Then her appendix burst while she's on vacation.
All of these things individually don't mean much, and no, not all of them have to do with age... but she's running out of nonessential body parts to get rid of.
Aw, hon, I know its hard right now to feel like things will get better for her, but trust me they can! My mom had quite a few issues when I was in middle school. An endocrine condition that led to her having her thyroid and parathyroids removed, a tumor on her pituitary gland, gall bladders stones (more than 1 round of 'em), fibroid muscle tumors that led to a hysterectomy and blood pressure problems. I stayed up many nights feeling like I was going to lose her. Our family actually looks back on that time and refer to it as "the crazy years." She's still crazy, don't get me wrong, but she is a lot healthier than she was and can out energize my sis and I. Its hard watching a family member go through all of that, especially a parent (which I think a lot of the older dwellers know too much about as well), but in reality, your mom is not all that old and with today's medical technology, she can improve. I doubt your mother would want you to be so overwhelmed with worry also.
Stupid fucking idiot boyfriend decided we should break up. He couldn't even come up with a decent reason. His complaints are: I don't like to party every weekend, I'm always sick (yeah like I can help that), I don't clean enough (neither does he), and I don't want to have children even though I'm willing to adopt and he's YEARS away from actually wanting them, so what does that even matter now?!
Oh and the really really shitty thing? This came up about 1 month ago, so I did take a hard look at my attitude and tried be more forgiving, less bitchy, more positive ect ect. I have made improvements. Then yesterday, without him having mentioned any complaints in the past month, he tells me I'm still too bitchy ect ect. If he had an issue, why the fuck didn't he talk to me about it? You want to know why? Because he's a shallow, hypocritical asshole. I have done everything to try and help him with his job and school situation, and this is my reward? He doesn't even recognize my improvements and claims that my trying to help him is in my own selfish interest!
Another door will open MTP. Be glad that he is giving you this opportunity!
Another door will open MTP. Be glad that he is giving you this opportunity!
I had opportunities I passed up for him.
sorry, mortie. remember that you ARE more than just pretty. darker days will pass on, the sun will shine again, all that shit.
suffer hard, suffer well, and then bloom again. we love ya.
Weren't you going to kick his ass to the curb anyway? You're well shot.
You'll be better without him. He seems immature. You have always impressed me with your wise-beyond-your-years mind. Wait for the guy who gets that.
Weren't you going to kick his ass to the curb anyway? You're well shot.
I had changed my mind about that. I was trying to be more outgoing and open minded.
The situation in Japan is upsetting me today.
The situation in Japan is upsetting me today.
This CNN slideshow: well some of them just break my heart. Such horrible devastation. :(
http://www.cnn.com/interactive/2011/03/world/hires.japan.quake/index.html?hpt=T1i am simply irritable.
grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
i am simply irritable.
She's so cross there's no telling where her temper went...
another CPS contact at work, major teacher layoffs in our contracted district and across the region, and the Head Start teachers in my organization are fighting about whether to unionize with heavy paranoia on both sides and threatening letters from our Executive Director, and it is time to write annual reviews...
MoreThanLucky
yes, way more than lucky
Just found out my mentally retarded cousin is going to be a victim of the PA budget cuts. Details setchy since it's a secret unofficial source, but it looks like her assisted independent living is being cut.
Over the weekend we had a rally at the capitol to protest the extensive education/Medicaid budget cuts. 11,000 people showed up. Governor Rick Perry relented and said they would dip into the "rainy day fund" to cover... about 20% of the education budget shortfall. Gee, thanks.
We'll see what happens to Special Ed here, I haven't heard anything yet. The Republicans at the Fed level want to end Head Start, the Dem Governor is axing district funding (well not in the richest districts but the rest of the state) so we'll see about UPK. That might just end integrated programs. Interesting times.
We'll see what happens to Special Ed here, I haven't heard anything yet. The Republicans at the Fed level want to end Head Start, the Dem Governor is axing district funding (well not in the richest districts but the rest of the state) so we'll see about UPK. That might just end integrated programs. Interesting times.
Do you teach in New York?
Colorado education and programs to help low income disabled are taking deep hits. At this rate, the disabled will all die and Colorado's children will attain maturity with only the skills to work the jobs the illegals take now.
So maybe there's a method in the madness. No nasty disabled people cluttering up Colorado's image as a ski and vacation paradise and no illegal aliens that the authorities have to track down. :rolleyes:
1) asshole OCD PTO memory-deficient treasurer who constantly needs to recheck details/forgets what we've agreed.... and is patronising like I'm the one who needs reminding....
2) stupid fucking internet service
3) CNN who think expatriate is pronounced ex-patriot.
The situation in Japan is upsetting me today.
and still this.
And This:
0254: Updated casualty figures for the quake just in: 5,178 people dead and 8,606 missing, AFP quote police as saying.
(BBC)
and the FuckYoushima thing.
Unbelievable and getting worse.
Unbelievable and getting worse.
As above.
The nuke crisis is horrible, but what makes it feel worse is that it's so drawn out. Even on Sunday at breakfast I was wondering if they had repaired it yet or if it had melted down yet. Just resolve the damn thing already.
Even the newspapers are running out of headlines for the thing. How many days in a row can you run a headline saying that things are getting worse?
no matter how bad things get, they can always get worse
Sure, but it presents challenges to the headline writers to come up with good and new headlines.
[SIZE="7"][FONT="Arial Black"]THINGS GET EVEN MORE WORSER AS THEY CONTINUE TO WORSEN[/FONT][/SIZE]
Story on p. 3
[SIZE="7"][FONT="Arial Black"]THE WORST IT'S EVER, EVER BEEN[/FONT][/SIZE]
[SIZE="5"][FONT="Arial Black"]THINGS EVEN WORSE THAN LAST TIME[/FONT][/SIZE]
[SIZE="7"][FONT="Arial Black"]PROBABLY DOESN'T GET ANY WORSE THAN THIS[/FONT][/SIZE]
remember how when it got really worse used to like to go up on the roof and hang out? Well, when it got really worse went up on the roof today and got a little too close to the edge and...
Do you have any worser-ster sauce?
it went from worse to bad?
FTR, I am not making fun of the victims, just the news whores
I'm sick of the bad news, and your joke headlines are funny. I smiled out loud at them. thanks!
It's getting better
It's a whole newt day.
I don't know witch of you two is worser
I'm sick of the bad news, and your joke headlines are funny. I smiled out loud at them. thanks!
I like pretty much all of 3Foot's posts.
I like pretty much all of 3Foot's posts.
:blush:
Charlie Brooker did a brilliant piece about the news coverage of the earthquake and the possible nuclear meltdown.
Wish it'd hurry up and get posted on youtube :p
Douche bags.
douche bags masquerading as human.
Now I'm just conflicted. Boyfriend decided he did in fact want to work things out, promised he was 100% sincere. Mom and sis think I should give him another chance. I just don't know if I can feel confident in him again.
MTP - past behavior is the best predictor of future behavior.
Listen to your OWN intuition.
Now I'm just conflicted. Boyfriend decided he did in fact want to work things out, promised he was 100% sincere. Mom and sis think I should give him another chance. I just don't know if I can feel confident in him again.
certainly he should be made to endure some trials and perform some herculean tasks.
get a copy of european fairy tales, the older the collection, the better. Stuff published in the 1800s to the early 1900s is best--before everything got sugar-coated with pc. Read about the guys who had to travel to the 30th kingdom and find the tears of lizard in order to free their princesses from the evil witch. Then compare that to some schlump who comes whinging "wahh take me back, the bartender wouldn't sleep with me..."
don't sell yourself short.
ymmv
How long have you guys been together, MTP? If you've invested years in the guy, I'd let him back on a strictly probationary basis. If he shapes up, fine. If not, there's lot of other fish in the aquarium.
If you haven't been together that long, cut your losses and show him to the door.
Mom and sis think I should give him another chance.
Aren't these the same people who think you must marry anyone you have had sex with, regardless of any other qualities they may or may not possess? :eyebrow:
Here's what it really boils down to: this guy is not permanent. You know (or at least you should by now) that you will not be spending the rest of your life with him. So if keeping him around for now is fun, and is easier and causes you less stress, then do that. If getting him out of your life makes it easier to focus on your impending surgery and college plans, then do that. But whatever you decide, do it based only on what's best for you, not your mom or your sister or your (ex)boyfriend.
Now I'm just conflicted. Boyfriend decided he did in fact want to work things out, promised he was 100% sincere. Mom and sis think I should give him another chance. I just don't know if I can feel confident in him again.
"Trust is a one time only offer."
-- Wolf
Aren't these the same people who think you must marry anyone you have had sex with, regardless of any other qualities they may or may not possess? :eyebrow:
Here's what it really boils down to: this guy is not permanent. You know (or at least you should by now) that you will not be spending the rest of your life with him. So if keeping him around for now is fun, and is easier and causes you less stress, then do that. If getting him out of your life makes it easier to focus on your impending surgery and college plans, then do that. But whatever you decide, do it based only on what's best for you, not your mom or your sister or your (ex)boyfriend.
These are the same people, and although I love them, I do fundamentally disagree with their relationship strategies. They think they only excuse to leave someone is abuse and that love is a choice. 1) It is not the only excuse, 2) sometimes it is, sometimes it is not the basics still have to be there. Sadly, I would already be gone if I felt like I could afford living on my own. I'm trying to get a budget together to figure out how likely that is and I am trying to find roomies I just don't want to live with a complete stranger and don't have a large pool of friends to choose from. I cannot move back in with my parents, that would be worse.
I do truly think he's a good guy, just not the one for me. We are different on an intellectual scale and maturity.
I do truly think he's a good guy, just not the one for me. We are different on an intellectual scale and maturity.
We have a winner!
Sadly, I would already be gone if I felt like I could afford living on my own. I'm trying to get a budget together to figure out how likely that is and I am trying to find roomies I just don't want to live with a complete stranger and don't have a large pool of friends to choose from. I cannot move back in with my parents, that would be worse.
I do truly think he's a good guy, just not the one for me. We are different on an intellectual scale and maturity.
Sounds like it would be worth it to let him stay around, then. Sure, you're kind of using him for rent money, but you'll be giving companionship and presumably sex in return. I doubt he thinks this relationship is headed towards marriage either, so as long as you're both happy enough...
but...but..! Clodfobble! You know zipless fucks are harder to do for the females - esp. younger females (younger and younger they get...)
zipless fucks are fine IF you can REALLY do it and not let all those hormones mess with your head. Otherwise, use him for rent money. No sex.
"Trust is a one time only offer."
-- Wolf
:yesnod:
Otherwise, use him for rent money. No sex.
I was gonna say no way could mtp get away with that, having already had sex with him before... but then I was thinking, she could do something like, "You have to prove you really care about me, and not just the sex. So you can come back, but no sex for 3 months."
Mind you, this isn't an agreement
I'd be able to adhere to myself, but I'm not particularly emotional about sex like that. It might work.
Sounds like it would be worth it to let him stay around, then. Sure, you're kind of using him for rent money, but you'll be giving companionship and presumably sex in return. I doubt he thinks this relationship is headed towards marriage either, so as long as you're both happy enough and use birth control religiously
FTFY
I was gonna say no way could mtp get away with that, having already had sex with him before... but then I was thinking, she could do something like, "You have to prove you really care about me, and not just the sex. So you can come back, but no sex for 3 months."
The sex as a weapon gambit is part of something that MTP is probably rejecting. She has to make her own call on recreational activities, but needs to remember that he will get sex somewhere so using him for rent money without a sexual relationship means he will be bringing women home. Maybe a sit-down to get real about their relationship is in order. "We are roomies nothing more", would be my advice, but I'm just some dude on the web.
Sounds like it would be worth it to let him stay around, then. Sure, you're kind of using him for rent money, but you'll be giving companionship and presumably sex in return. I doubt he thinks this relationship is headed towards marriage either, so as long as you're both happy enough...
For now, I'm going to try to work it out while looking into an escape plan. If he is the best choice, I will stay. I'm not trying to use him, although that is what it seems, but I think its a mutual beneficial situation.
The sex as a weapon gambit is part of something that MTP is probably rejecting. She has to make her own call on recreational activities, but needs to remember that he will get sex somewhere so using him for rent money without a sexual relationship means he will be bringing women home. Maybe a sit-down to get real about their relationship is in order. "We are roomies nothing more", would be my advice, but I'm just some dude on the web.
Oh sure, go the
mature and responsible route. ;)
Oh sure, go the mature and responsible route. ;)
Sorry, won't happen again.
How to find the like button
What's wrong with a kiss, boy? Hmm? Why not start her off with a nice kiss? ... You don't have to go leaping straight for the clitoris like a bull at a gate. Give her a kiss, boy.
Why does HE want to work it out? Tell him he can come back as a roomy. No sex.
There is only one reason a person wants to have sex with someone they tried to manipulate into changing and then subsequently dumping.
Tell him he can live there but to go jump someone else, or more politely, you should both see other people, if there is really anything to work out. I would not make myself available for more hurt. On the other hand, being unavailable will make you more attractive and so, he might do some heroic deed as foot mentioned. If not then he'll just be satisfied with his flop house. I believe that is all he wants is a nice comfy place to go flop and if offered a nice warm body too.
What Sky said, and is it just me or don't you guys think that a prereq for a good roomy is that they are willing and able to pay part of the rent and not hit up their girlfriend for fundage?
I couldn't sleep last night - got maybe 3 hours, and now I have to go in and work a 14 hour shift. :coffee2: 10:00 pm is a 1,000 years away.
I couldn't sleep last night - got maybe 3 hours, and now I have to go in and work a 14 hour shift. :coffee2: 10:00 pm is a 1,000 years away.
There is only one reason a person wants to have sex with someone they tried to manipulate into changing and then subsequently dumping.
.
Apologies for being dim here but what is that reason if not just to have sex...not being faecetious, I genuinely want to know so that I can be sure I've understood the comment properly.
Apologies for being dim here but what is that reason if not just to have sex...not being faecetious, I genuinely want to know so that I can be sure I've understood the comment properly.
...and the reason he does a 360 turn around is because he's a user and a loser?
Maybe 'I' missed something. Maybe I missed the part where he was respectful, valuating and contributing, would never try to play on her emotions by getting her to change, then not respecting her for trying but then dumping her.
Not being angry at you, casi or anyone, but I care about someone nice like mtp getting mind, financially and otherwise, fuck'ed.
To me, this is beyond simply wanting to have sex. We all want to have sex.
Calls to mind this blast from the past:
[YOUTUBE]VlMBs_HUcxQ&start=34s[/YOUTUBE]
so, I've been working around the house today, finally getting to some projects that have been bugging me for a while--that's good, but . . .
after a couple of hours of this, I'm so tired and in pain, I'm practically crying. My back and hips hurt like hell, I'm barely mobile.
I no longer have the strength or stamina to do much. things are improving slowly because I'm exercising and taking anti-inflammatory and joint supplements, but it still sucks.
I hear ya, Cloud. I take 800mg ibuprophen every single day or I ache like a 90 year old woman.
If I'm going to walk the goggie I MUST take it 30 min. before or my knees, lower back, hips and sacro-iliac joints get so stiff and painful....the S-I joints are the WORST - they can even ache when I'm in bed trying to go to sleep.
Ah, to be 19 again...
TBH - all this stuff happend post-chemo.
Chemo has a lot to answer for - but I suppose it saved my life...I just didn't know I was going to be in pain all the time.
I guess you take the bad with the good, and there's a lot of good in my life right now, so . . . meh
OR, you get yourself to a doctor and see if it's something that can be fixed quite simply.
...and the reason he does a 360 turn around is because he's a user and a loser?
Maybe 'I' missed something. Maybe I missed the part where he was respectful, valuating and contributing, would never try to play on her emotions by getting her to change, then not respecting her for trying but then dumping her.
Not being angry at you, casi or anyone, but I care about someone nice like mtp getting mind, financially and otherwise, fuck'ed.
To me, this is beyond simply wanting to have sex. We all want to have sex.
I think he's basically a good guy, just too immature still. Doesn't really know how he should approach a problem and try to work it, which to be fair, a lot of people don't. I have my flaws, and thats why when he wanted to break up the first time I was willing to work on them, but when I tried point out that he wasn't perfect either, he decided I was attacking him and trying to make him "look like the bad guy." He accuses me of being negative but then tells me I am selfish for giving him advice like: don't try to take full time class and work 50+ hours/week, he thinks I do that in selfishness. Which really hurt, I was just trying to keep him from failing classes or getting too exhausted. *sigh* Anyway, my sister has decided that I probably do need to leave. She and my brother-in-law have offered to let me rent their extra room. It would be mutually beneficial since they could use the extra financial help and maybe I could help my sis with chores and such. My mom thinks we'll fight and I'll put a strain on their marriage. My sis and I get along really well now, so I hope not, and if so, I'll have an end date of when I'll have to have a new place. I think I'm gonna take the offer.
so, I've been working around the house today, finally getting to some projects that have been bugging me for a while--that's good, but . . .
after a couple of hours of this, I'm so tired and in pain, I'm practically crying. My back and hips hurt like hell, I'm barely mobile.
I no longer have the strength or stamina to do much. things are improving slowly because I'm exercising and taking anti-inflammatory and joint supplements, but it still sucks.
You've been to the doctor then? I'm guessing so since you're on anti-inflammatory drugs and joint supplements. Just keep to it, I'm sure it will be worth it.
I read anti-inflammatory supplements. No Rx required. I'm betting no doctor, but good for you if you did, Cloud, sorry it's not helping yet.
no doctor yet; I'll get there eventually, but I want to see how much I can alleviate it myself first. just hurting today and feeling sorry for myself, I guess.
I mean, what is the doctor gonna say? "you have osteoarthritis. You're old and you're fat. Here's some pills. See me in 5 years for a hip replacement."
(scowls)
OR, you could be damaging yourself further. Trust me, in this game, I'm queen! I have learned through long, hard and painful experience(s), that coping strategies for joint pain can cause more damage and grief in the long run than the original problem. I know you hate bring poked and prodded, but go, find out.
well, I think it's a given that it's degenerative, but I hear you. i will--just not quite ready.
...and the reason he does a 360 turn around is because he's a user and a loser?
Thanks Sky. That makes more sense now. Cheers for taking the time to explain.
No freaking passports is really pissing me off/getting me worried,
I applied 7 weeks ago, eight weeks before we needed to travel. processing time is 4 weeks for renewals (these are renewals) 6 weeks for new applications. My card was charged three weeks ago. Where are my goddamn freaking passports? :mad:
Minifobette has a cavity on one molar, and "pre-cavities" on three others. She's not even three yet, for crying out loud! The dentist said she's got "one of those mouths," and that the pH of her saliva is the most to blame. To get them filled, we've got to decide if full sedation or pinning her down is the way to go. Big drawbacks to both choices.
full sedation, despite the enhanced "hangover."
how is she with NO2?
Krill oil one of the best for inflammation...
Minifobette has a cavity on one molar, and "pre-cavities" on three others. She's not even three yet, for crying out loud! The dentist said she's got "one of those mouths," and that the pH of her saliva is the most to blame. To get them filled, we've got to decide if full sedation or pinning her down is the way to go. Big drawbacks to both choices.
Does he have any suggestions for balancing her pH level? I know she's on a special diet like your other fob, but maybe a certain food or toothpaste could help? Clearly I don't know how these things works. Hopefully, if there is nothing you can do, it will work itself out by the time she has her adult teeth.
They say the pH tends to be genetic, not really connected to diet. Diet provides the sugars, the pH provides the hospitable environment. True enough, I've never had a single cavity, despite a period in childhood where I didn't brush at all for about 2 years. Meanwhile Mr. Clod has battled countless cavities, though he has religiously brushed, flossed, and mouthwashed twice a day for pretty much his whole life. She clearly got his salivary genes, and Minifob got mine.
There are mouth sprays you can use to get the pH a little more in line with whatever level doesn't support bacterial growth, but the effects only last as long as it takes for the liquid to be washed out of your mouth, minutes at best.
full sedation, despite the enhanced "hangover."
how is she with NO2?
NO2 is not okay for her, but there are other anesthetics that are. The problem is that sedation is not covered by insurance, and with the surgery center and the attendants and the anesthesiologist it runs about $10,000 all told. We're going to try to get the dental work piggy-backed onto her sedation for a gastrointestinal scope--the scope may or may not happen, but if it does the sedation will be covered under that procedure.
If it doesn't, we're going to have to opt for the non-sedated in-office cavity drilling. This is not the end of the world, except with 4 teeth it will be a long procedure to have to pin her down for (it won't really hurt, but it will piss her off tremendously,) and what we
really want is to seal all 8 molars at once so we don't have to deal with inevitable future cavities until the adult teeth come in. 8 teeth isn't going to happen unless she's sedated.
Holy mackerel, that's a lot of $.
I just got a cc from my insurance re my surgery. of the $2000 billed (so far) the insurance co denied all but $165. What a racket.
Who's going to hold her down? You or a pro? When Hector cut his head to the skull aged nearly 3, the hospital brought in a "professional holder-downer" He was the biz. I was amazed. If the dentist doesn't have one of these, consider employing one rather than doing it yourself. And yes, Hector had major stranger issues then -especially with men as we found out when we needed the stitches removing, but this guy was all Crocodile Dundee on him.
I had pretty much every dental treatment under the sun (baby teeth removed in the chair, braces, palate expander etc...) when I was a kid and now I HAAAAAAAAAAAATE dentists...to the extent that I stopped going to the dentist as an adult as I was petrified of the pain and also of the dentist getting angry with me because I wouldn't sit still in the chair (luckily have now found a dental technician who cleans teeth in a painfree way...bless her). In short, I'd go the general.
Krill oil one of the best for inflammation...
Do you use it?
Do you use it?
Absolutely! when I run out I feel like the TIN MAN!! Mega Krill made by Schiff is in most drug stores.
Who's going to hold her down? You or a pro? When Hector cut his head to the skull aged nearly 3, the hospital brought in a "professional holder-downer" He was the biz. I was amazed. If the dentist doesn't have one of these, consider employing one rather than doing it yourself. And yes, Hector had major stranger issues then -especially with men as we found out when we needed the stitches removing, but this guy was all Crocodile Dundee on him.
Generally it goes that I do the bulk of the gross-motor restraining, and the assistants do the precision work. So in this case it would be me from the neck down, and a tech would hold her head still. They won't do full sedation in the office, but now I'm wondering if I could half-sedate her myself. There's a safe drug called Versed which will make her calm and loopy, AND has the added benefit of inducing amnesia from the time you take it. They gave it to Minifob before both surgeries so he would enter the operating room and take an IV calmly, and it worked great. The dentist likely won't administer it outside of a hospital setting, but I'm thinking maybe he would give me a prescription for one dose, and I would give it to her right before we walk in. Then he could give her the shot of novocaine and go to town, and her sensory problems with people getting all up in her mouth wouldn't be a problem.
Sounds like a wise plan, cf.
ten grand, casi.
I keep on forgetting about the difference in the cost of dental/medical care. In Oz, if you've got private medical which doesn't usually break the bank (although I have been known to complain long and hard about the cost of mine), these things are affordable if you have a decent salary. I'm guessing that's not the case in the US?
I had pretty much every dental treatment under the sun (baby teeth removed in the chair, braces, palate expander etc...) when I was a kid and now I HAAAAAAAAAAAATE dentists...to the extent that I stopped going to the dentist as an adult as I was petrified of the pain and also of the dentist getting angry with me because I wouldn't sit still in the chair (luckily have now found a dental technician who cleans teeth in a painfree way...bless her). In short, I'd go the general.
We should compare dental records. Mine was a lifetime chain reaction from falling on the playground in 2nd grade and having one of my permanent front teeth jammed up into my head. When I was a kid, going to the dentist/orthodontist was like "meh, don't even bother with the novocaine." As an adult, it was hard to get back to going. And, I paid for it physically and financially when some of my childhood repairs finally gave out. How many root canals can one person have? I expect my years long chronic infection spot deep in my root will also flare up someday. (hey, maybe that's why I am sick all the time?)
So, now, whatever they want to give me I'll take.
No. Fun. At. All. Poor kid.
I keep on forgetting about the difference in the cost of dental/medical care. In Oz, if you've got private medical which doesn't usually break the bank (although I have been known to complain long and hard about the cost of mine), these things are affordable if you have a decent salary. I'm guessing that's not the case in the US?
Yeah. I've still not caught back up. WITH insurance. :(
OR, you get yourself to a doctor and see if it's something that can be fixed quite simply.
an update--went to the doctor this morning. Touch of arthritis, probably more bursitis. No damage to the joint, yay! So, lose weight, take anti-inflammatories, yadda, which is what I was doing anyway.
went to the doctor this morning
:thumb:
I keep on forgetting about the difference in the cost of dental/medical care. In Oz, if you've got private medical which doesn't usually break the bank (although I have been known to complain long and hard about the cost of mine), these things are affordable if you have a decent salary. I'm guessing that's not the case in the US?
We actually have fantastic medical coverage, and average dental. But our dental insurance says that sedation in particular isn't necessary, it's a convenience. Because normal people ought to be able to just take the shot of novocaine and then lay still while it happens (and I agree, normal people should.) And sedation also ought to be at least somewhat cheaper than that, but the malpractice insurance rates for anesthesiologists are some of the highest in the medical profession, and no one wants to sedate a 2 year old in the first place, so there are only a couple of locations that will do it. And they're the expensive ones.
I sent my SIL an email this am and she wrote back saying she was in Cairo! WTF! She goes to Egypt often but WTF NOW? :neutral:
We should compare dental records.
This and the dislike of brussel sprouts in common too! But, thank god, I've never had a root canal.
no one wants to sedate a 2 year old in the first place...
Poor thing.
This and the dislike of brussel sprouts in common too! But, thank god, I've never had a root canal.
root canals are more tedious than painful, they take a long time. put on some tunes, close your eyes, keep your mouth open...
root canals are more tedious than painful, they take a long time. put on some tunes, close your eyes, keep your mouth open...
I hope that I never, ever have to have one, but if I do, I'll follow your advice.
root canals are more tedious than painful, they take a long time. put on some tunes, close your eyes, keep your mouth open...
Puh. Typically. However, the other front tooth (the one that didn't end up in my skull) was supposed to have "died." Well, it wasn't "dead" so they were drilling up into a raw nerve. A couple years after the accident, too, they had to drill a hole in the back and leave it open so all the infection stuff could drain out.
My other ones hurt a bit I think because my dentist was quite amazed at how long the roots on my teeth are. It was no small task. The tugging and stuff, that's what's sore later.
It all started with a frenectomy, which I barely even remember. Weirdly, both my brothers had to have that done too.
But, I'm probably playing the "more dentalled than anyone else" card. :rolleyes:
But, I'm probably playing the "more dentalled than anyone else" card. :rolleyes:
Hey, if you are "more dentalled than anyone else", absolutely fair enough. I say, go for it.
Heh. My mom and I talked about this yesterday. She remembers Dr S calling my house after I'd left a particularly painful appt (I was in HS and was in the habit of driving myself) because he was worried about me driving home. It was just what I did. Go to school, go to practice, go to the dentist/orthodontist. :)
....why don't you jack it in, drive up here and come to Canada with us this weekend...looks like there'll be two spare seats in the car :rolleyes:
My job, my finances...everything. I'm so freaking depressed I wish this window opened. :(
....why don't you jack it in, drive up here and come to Canada with us this weekend...looks like there'll be two spare seats in the car :rolleyes:
Always wanted to go to Canada. :o
My job, my finances...everything. I'm so freaking depressed I wish this window opened. :(
Good job it doesn't...
root canals are more tedious than painful, they take a long time. put on some tunes, close your eyes, keep your mouth open...
And ask for
and fill the Rx for percosets.
My other ones hurt a bit I think because my dentist was quite amazed at how long the roots on my teeth are. It was no small task. The tugging and stuff, that's what's sore later.
My endo told me that less than 20% of people have an extra root canal in their tooth. I've had 2 root canals done, and I've hit the unlucky lottery on both - they had the extra canal.
Always wanted to go to Canada. :o
How far to Monster's place from your place?
Just a couple, four, hours?
Yeah, can't get away just now but I am going up there sometime.
casi, I think you read my mind. :)
Couple Hours. But ya gotta getta enhanced oojimacallit. or a passport.
No, they still haven't arrived. :mad:
Yes I have no passport, I have no passport today.
You still don't have yours? WTF?
I know. I wrote a pome to fsm then the doorbell rang and I was all touched by noodly goodness and then it wasn't the passports so now I'm thinking of converting to toastaism. :(
I don't have favourite children of course, but if I did, one of them would certainly be Tennant.
He's a friend of Tiger's and is often smiley, very resiliant, and when he's not he's solemn in a world weary way which is very droll. Oh he has a good sense of humour too - for his age.
I knew he was off at the end of last week because his mother was in hospital.
Found out this morning it was cancer.
Thyroid cancer.
She's had surgery and they think they have removed all the affected area, but of course she has to wait and see now.
Tennent spent most of the lunchbreak with me just watching the others playing football.
He seemed happy enough, but he's usually quite a rough and tumble little lad.
FUCK cancer.
Thyroid cancer is one of the most treatable. Whip it out, a little radioative iodine, game over. Something like 97% survival rate.
I know, but I heard she had the whole thyroid removed, which could mean it's one of the more aggressive versions.
Fingers crossed.
Indeed, but she'll be fine. They like to remove the whole thyroid to be safe
I know. I wrote a pome to fsm then the doorbell rang and I was all touched by noodly goodness and then it wasn't the passports so now I'm thinking of converting to toastaism. :(
Humans will let you down, but toast never will.
I know, but I heard she had the whole thyroid removed, which could mean it's one of the more aggressive versions.
Fingers crossed.
Nah Sundae, they're removing my whole thyroid JUST IN CASE. Thats the odd thing about some thyroid cancers, you can't actually just do a test to see if its cancer before you remove it. You have to remove at least the lobe with the abnormality in order to biopsy and find out. Removing just the abnormality tends to have more complications than removing the whole lobe believe it or not. In addition to that, depending on the condition of the other lobe, they just take that one too. Thyroid cancers are usually contained in with in the thyroid, not much worry about it spreading. She just has to take a simple (and cheap even here in the US) synthetic hormone to regulate.
It's $4 a month for a generic brand. My mom has been taking a pill daily for the last, oh I don't know, 23 years or so longer.
My mom just told me our insurance is changing to a whole different company on May 1. My thyroid surgery is supposed to be May 17. I had less than $800 left to meet my deductible, have a surgeon and everything planned out. She didn't give me any more information either which pisses me off. When the hell did she find this out?
That totally sucks. When we switched insurance here at work a year ago, people were told that if they were undergoing treatment for a specific isolated medical issue, they could be grandfathered in to the old insurance until that specific issue was taken care of. (Chronic long term problems excluded.) It's worth checking to see if since you have a surgery scheduled, you might be able to continue with the old insurance until that surgery is performed.
Sheesh, mtp...I'm sorry such a stressful thing is made even more stressful. Insurance...what a crock. :(
Just a couple, four, hours?
Yeah, can't get away just now but I am going up there sometime.
casi, I think you read my mind. :)
If you can, make a definite date so you DO get there.
I can't make a def. date, but probably early summer. Thanks casi.
Today: I don't get it. Is my whole world just a big meaningless fantasy? There doesn't seem to be any purpose, and I don't seem to have a place. I ask for what I need, I don't demand or beg, I'm honest...where does that get you, when it's all just hanging by a thread and in the back of your mind is always the fear that there will be that one 'snip' and lots of laughter as I fall so fucking far down that getting back up may seem impossible.
What am I, a giant social experiment? A topic of philosophical blathering? Just another tick on the post? Is any of it real? Does honesty count for anything? Anything at all?
I feel your pain, IM.
I just handled a phone call and I wasn't at my best. I feel sort of sick over it. But what can I do? I have five doctors all lined up every month for money and I only have so much money to go around. I'd LOVE to pay these people off - but, short of wiinning the lottery...I keep chipping away at the cancer bills but they never seem to get any smaller.
Sigh.
They save your life and then your life ain't worth a plug nickel. :(
I am really irritable at the moment. No reason. Not 'unhappy' or upset as such...but my temper feels like it is on a hair trigger. I can veer from chilled out and happy to completely wound up in 60 seconds flat, and then that's it, mind racing, thoughts churning. Over really silly shit as well.
You need to go pet your puppy.
For Bri :flower:
And I agree with HLJ, Dana, give Pilau a big old hug! My Gaines sure cheered me up today. :)
It's kind of upsetting me, but also mildly irritating. It comes and goes.
I ate too much chickpea curry yesterday, and the outcome overnight and today is that I can't stop farting, and BOY do they STINK!
I'm never doing that again!
Hahahahaha! They're garbanzo BEANS. But you just reminded me that my discovery of a new work cafe offering of hummus (the garlic) and pretzels might not be good for my breath or the end that does the windy thing. :lol:
I suppose curry would exacerbate that effect.
You need to go pet your puppy.
... Is that what they call it these days?
mtp - sorry to hear about your thyroid problem. i know that dealing with insurance can be a major hassle. hang in there. i pray it all works out for you!
OK...deep calming breath. I will NOT have to start over on my deductible and my surgeon does accept the new insurance...if it even changes, nothing is set in stone. Now I just need to catch up on school, pack and move to my sister's on sunday. Somehow deal with my inability to break up, we are taking a "step back" rather than breaking up. So...yeah. I'm complicated.
I'm sorry shaw/IM for your stress....wanna move to Texas? We can get our own pity apartment and throw pity parties for ourselves? For that matter, Dani and Sundae are invited too :P. I think we'd end up having lots of fun.
We'll put a beautifully rendered sign on the front door: Men, please leave all baggage at the front door. kthx. ;)
mtp - sorry to hear about your thyroid problem. i know that dealing with insurance can be a major hassle. hang in there. i pray it all works out for you!
Man, you're dealing with a lot worse. If it helps you feel better, my mom went through two years of health hell...there was always that "what now?" moment. Eventually they got it figured out for the most part and she's doing well now. More energy (and crazy) than my sis and I put together I swear. There is a light at the end of the tunnel for you too I'm sure.
You know, I'm really upset that no one cares about my arse problems today!
I'm just glad that I'm not there.
You'd be upset if you were. ;)
I'm sure the people nearest to you care.
We'll put a beautifully rendered sign on the front door: Men, please leave all baggage at the front door. kthx. ;)
And my new rule: They must be able to cook a steak to perfect rare or medium rare doneness, NEVER over that.
You'd be upset if you were. ;)
Control your arse woman! (As I imagine my brother would say).
That's the problem. IT'S OUTTA CONTROL!!!
That's the problem. IT'S OUTTA CONTROL!!!
Brother does not care. Take yourself outside then is what he would say.
(or he might borrow you some meds from his pharmacy)
It's raining outside. My arse is staying indoors. lol
Anyway, I was just trying to have some fun with you all.
Mmmmhmmm...sure thats all you were doing....suuuuure.
yeah, we could smell it....that or thats the trash....
We'll put a beautifully rendered sign on the front door: Men, please leave all baggage at the front door. kthx. ;)
Ha! But then you would have no male visitors! What a lonely existance.
Ha! But then you would have no male visitors! What a lonely existance.
No males = awesome!
No males = awesome!
No males for morethanpretty = heaven!!! Exactly what you deserve!:D
Ha! But then you would have no male visitors! What a lonely existance.
See...the vast majority of males wouldn't read that sign or if they did, they would think that it didn't apply to them and walk right on in anyway. (Who wouldn't want to hang out with MTP, IM, SG and Dana?)
See...the vast majority of males wouldn't read that sign or if they did, they would think that it didn't apply to them and walk right on in anyway. (Who wouldn't want to hang out with MTP, IM, SG and Dana?)
They would walk in anyway. Once. :lol:
It's like the roach motel.
With a comfortable couch.
With a comfortable couch.
with a hobo on it
I had to get a different kind of chocolate to cover my Easter chicks, as Dad dropped me off at his supermarket and not mine.
It just didn't occur to me that I've become used to working with one kind. I know how much oil to add to make it slightly glossy and slower to harden, which makes it easier to work with.
I obviously added too much for this new type, as the choc is not hardening at all. Well, it is now, because it's in the fridge. But they can't stay in the fridge, they're due at school tomorrow. And if they go back to being tacky again they will be horrid. Am tempted to leave them for Mum - she'll probably only have one, they're a bit sickly - and redo them again next week.
Every new thing I try is effectively a trial run of course. But I hate it when a mistake I have made spoils a whole batch.
I'll take a pic anyway.
Actually, I might not even try them again. They don't look as good as I'd hoped.
And as I said, I've found all the cake pops to be a bit sickly. They have a wow appeal, but the larger cakes I make get compliments afterwards.
Grrrrr.
Maybe I'll just make another bundt cake and slap some Mini Eggs on the top.
If it goes down just as well then it's not worth the fiddling about....
Minimum effort for maximum praise. I am a cake whore.
MTP, I'm not sure I can handle Texas.
Could y'all come to London?
The Pity Parties will involve pizza and vodka and barfing. Then we can all pretend to detox whilst sneaking out for our own particular poison.
Ali, I'm not sorry about your arse.
How'd the choc chicks work out SG?
Not too bad in the end!
I'll post a pic in Cherry's Cakes or whatever I called the thread.
First post. Not a happy one. Just lost a third of my income today. Not a happy bunny.
:(
Sorry to hear that, Blib. I hope that your post is not a prelude to your attempting to market a wonderful way to replace and exceed that income ...
I just learned that one of my best friend's mother passed away last evening.
A former Councillor who I really liked and respected passed away yesterday. He stepped down from his seat about a year ago after a massive heart attack. The last time I saw him he looked half his previous weight and very pale.
He was a truly wonderful man. A very talented poet and artist as well as a genuine community activist. A Liberal democrat, he was always very kind to me and had the affection and respect of all the members.
Rest in Peace Peter Cole.
Sorry to hear that, Blib. I hope that your post is not a prelude to your attempting to market a wonderful way to replace and exceed that income ...
Hehe !!!. No, no get rich scheme from me. Wolf, your post puts things into perspective. I'm grateful for my loving family, firends and my health. All of the rest is just cream on top.
:)
p.s. Even though you replied to my original post, I can't see it myself. Weird. But, I know, "read the bloody FAQs! " :)
Not too bad in the end!
.
But how did they taste?
See the Cake thread!
But I will answer you anyway, rather than be too self-important.
I found them sickly sweet.
Cake balls (the basis of any cake pops) are cake mixed with frosting.
As someone who usually leaves the frosting until last and spread thinly, the cakepops are already too rich.
THEN I add a covering of melted chocolate. And in this case a pastry case too!
In which the chicks were secured with a dab of apricot jam.
They were complimented. But I do think I'll move onto bigguns.
I'm just so tired of feeling sick and like I'm one small disaster away from total annihilation. I'm behind, a loser, can't keep a stable relationship. Only one thing keeps me afloat and that in of itself I feel like I'm failing.
Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.
-Buddha
I'm just so tired of feeling sick and like I'm one small disaster away from total annihilation. I'm behind, a loser, can't keep a stable relationship. Only one thing keeps me afloat and that in of itself I feel like I'm failing.
Don't be down on yourself if you can help it. It only makes things seem worse. Try and concentrate on the good things. xx
As one "behind loser" to another, I feel what you feel and it sucks. I'm starting to figure out that "they" know even less about what they're doing than I do, so it is easier for them to get results by criticizing someone capable of change than by looking at their own shit.
great. just fucking great. the fucking faa has suspended my goddamn ticket.
Sick and tired of being sick and tired.
Fuck Crohn's
why?
ok. i'm clear headed enough now. back in '02 i was pulled over for speeding but had had 3 beers with dinner. i refused the breathalyser as most pilots do. long story short, the state lost their evidence and dropped the charges to reckless driving. i took it because i was tired of spending money on lawyers. when the idiot clerk or whomever entered the plea into the computer he/she not only put in the reckless driving but the dwi as well. so the dwi i just got in september and that error in '02 is now grounds for my "voluntary" surrender of my medical. and if i don't "voluntarily" surrender it within 14 days they will take legal action.
how do i fix this? money. lots and lots of money. #1 i have to hire a lawyer to fix the error in '02 then god knows what i have to do for the faa to get my medical back.
god knows what i have to do for the faa to get my medical back.
Bend over , spread yer cheeks , and say Thank You Sir may I have Another Many times !!!
Just Kidding , sorry to hear this !!
god knows what i have to do for the faa to get my medical back.
Bend over , spread yer cheeks , and say Thank You Sir may I have Another Many times !!!
Just Kidding , sorry to hear this !!
yeah. "HI! i'm from the government and i'm here to help!!"
ffs.
I hope you can get it fixed, plt.
I know advice is the last thing you want right now but I, as a friend, am going to give it anyway.
Do NOT surrender your medical! Make them go to court and take it! Given your income level, you qualify for a PD or a pro bono case...check with the local legal hotline. Many good lawyers will take on a pro bono case if it's an easy win for them. Doing so somehow makes them look good to their firms.
Get your day in court and tell your side of the issue. If you have any original paperwork from the traffic case such as the plea deal (if it was in writing) or case transcripts, bring it with you to bolster your case. The lawyer may even be able to get the DWI error expunged with a simple letter. Ask him/her about it.
You have taken enough deals from the DA...fight back this time!
that's my :2cents:
My co-teacher has had a stroke... at 24 years of age, insanity.
Oh my, Griff. 24? Geez.
Will he/she be OK?
That's not good. Wishing them all the best. My SIL had a stroke in her early 30s.
Holy crap! What's the news on damage/recovery, Griff?
Not yours I hope, Monster?
sorta. I made a ceramic mobius strip heart for beest and for some reason it was left in a stupid place and now it's smashed. I don't think I even have a photo of it.
people taking me for granted
I had that kind of feeling today, and much worse than that, I feel like a ghost, no one seems to notice me and I hate that!
Welcome skipper386, I noticed your post.
Hi skipper. :waves:
Wow, that monster post was like, 2007. Eerie.
I had that kind of feeling today, and much worse than that, I feel like a ghost, no one seems to notice me and I hate that!
did you hear something?
You really do have a wicked sense of humour jim ;p
@llo there skipper, welcome to the cuckoo's nest. Wolf will be round directly with the meds. Try not to get under the orderly's feet.
Oh my, Griff. 24? Geez.
Will he/she be OK?
She is supposed to be coming back to work tomorrow, so I hope so. She was attributing the event to all kinds of different things, stress migraine etc... but the CAT scan (I think) confirmed. She didn't get it checked out for a week, who thinks stroke at her age?
that's just messed up right there. 24? stroke? no. no one could think that.
It is related to migraines at that age -that's what they told my SIL. If she's coming back to work, that's excellent news.
It is related to migraines at that age -that's what they told my SIL. If she's coming back to work, that's excellent news.
OK OK! I'll go to the doc and get my headaches checked out. Happy now?
...who thinks stroke at her age?
No disrespect meant at all, Griff, but substance abusers have a disproportionate number of strokes at a young age. Cocaine, even booze can do it.
so can some of the other drugs kids like to use - like Adderall, ritalin, etc.
I don't mean to imply that she is a substance abuser, but docs know it is a possibility.
OK OK! I'll go to the doc and get my headaches checked out. Happy now?
yes.
My SIL was not active at all, either. Her case was quite extreme, she was found unconscious and only just survived. She is permanently disabled now -physically and mentally. I don't know if it could have been prevented.
I think griff's cow orker has been extremely lucky by the sounds of it and hopefully will be able to do something to prevent future strokes, but if not, at least know to go straight to the doc.
Well that's cheerful, huh? Sorry to bring y'all down.
Shit - I was here to post about my recent low-grade health problems (culminating with a day in bed today, which I HATE to take in this job)
Feels pathetic now...
Support and love to those really suffering health issues.
Have had catarrh for a while now.
Combined with viral symptoms (two tops on and shivering with the heating on - this from the person who would like to live in a freezer) and then sheathed in sweat, drenching the bedclothes with the fan on and the window open. All joints aching, heachache, every tooth in my head hurting, every follicle of hair... Also sickness (prolly from constant coughing) and then diarrhoea. Oh and complete loss of appetitie. Now that is a serious symptom.
So after another night last night coughing ineffectively (despite decongestant) and sweating through the bedclothes, waking up every 40 minutes as far as I can tell, I have rested today and am up and about this evening.
I will make up the time at school. It won't affect my pay (I'll get a reduced rate as sick pay I think, or maybe even not be paid - I didn't pay attention to the contract!) but Tiger will get the hours he's supposed to.
Am still speaking in a hoarse whisper and coughing when I move, but I no longer feel liable to puke in anyone's lap.
Damn Reception-level infection rates though. The first job I've ever loved (I did enjoy some of course) and I've had two days off in the first six months. Pathetic. Anyone suggest anything to boost the immune system that actually has medical proof?
Colloidal Silver, while I don't have the required medical documentation I don't really get a day off. Animals need food 7 days a week. My hub and I are rarely ill no matter whose children or those that are sick, we are around.
Anyone suggest anything to boost the immune system that actually has medical proof?
Vitamin D. Much higher doses than the RDA, which is a pittance and will only barely stave off rickets. 1,000-2,000 IU per day, in my non-medically-licensed opinion.
yes.
My SIL was not active at all, either. Her case was quite extreme, she was found unconscious and only just survived. She is permanently disabled now -physically and mentally. I don't know if it could have been prevented.
I think griff's cow orker has been extremely lucky by the sounds of it and hopefully will be able to do something to prevent future strokes, but if not, at least know to go straight to the doc.
Well that's cheerful, huh? Sorry to bring y'all down.
I went today, both my hip hurt and had a headache today. Doc thinks migraines and I'm too fat. He gave sample migraine meds, told me to loose weight (which I knew but I wanted to make sure there was nothing else going on with my hip b/c the pain is really bad) and took an x-ray just in case. Said if there is something wrong with the bone (I have been in a couple of wrecks) I might need physical therapy. I took the migraine med earlier and I still have some pain, so I'm not sure if thats gonna do it. I might have to go back, he said if it didn't work they'd have to check for other causes. I've had the headaches since I was a child they've just been worse lately.
No disrespect meant at all, Griff, but substance abusers have a disproportionate number of strokes at a young age. Cocaine, even booze can do it.
so can some of the other drugs kids like to use - like Adderall, ritalin, etc.
I don't mean to imply that she is a substance abuser, but docs know it is a possibility.
Yeah, but not this one. Apparently she has a hole in her heart which is where the clot came from... She worked today but I think she should have been resting. I'm exhausted and all I have is back strain.
Issue #1: Home office told me (I'm the assistant ops/office manager at a courier company) today that I have to slash our employee work hours by half because they're not happy with the amount of money we are losing. We have always lost money on our actual employees, but the revenue has usually been made up by our independent contractors and scheduled routes. This still appears to be the case, but a culture of fear has been instilled by the contracting company...and it is trickling down into my own company. Furthermore, my boss (the ops mgr) is trying to fight with really weird schedule contortions rather than making the cuts and letting the chips fall where they may. I think my idea is better because it will open my company's eyes really quick as to how badly we need those employees that would be cut. The situation is giving me a migraine.
Issue #2: I met a really nice gal about 2 months ago. We became friends and I asked her on a date in late February. She said yes and the date seemed to go great...she even said so. In the time leading up to the date, we were growing closer, and it looked like a relationship was going to develop. After the date, we talked about going on a second date in the near future, and we continued talking for the next few days as we had been. But 3 days after the date, she sent me an e-mail, telling me that after a great deal of soul-searching, she didn't see us being more than friends.
I'm not mad at her...I understand that people are fickle creatures and she maybe wasn't sure of her feelings about me. I guess once she met me in person, she didn't feel that connection...it happens. But based on how things had been going, I was deeply hurt by the situation. I tried to stay friends with her after this, but about 2 weeks ago, I told her that I couldn't be friends with her right now because it just hurt too much to interact with her (we communicated a lot on FB and Twitter)...and she said she understood.
Tonight, I was going to go a bar here in Downtown KC that I frequent, and asked some Twitter friends if they were interested in joining me. That's when another friend of mine told me that she and the gal in question were going to be down there. I told them both I'd see them down there.
I wanted to try and overcome my "stage fright" on this issue...we have quite a few mutual friends here in KC, and we will inevitably cross paths again. And she is really an awesome person...I miss her friendship a lot. But my body started freaking the fuck out...heart racing, light headed, etc. I tried to calm myself down...I really wanted to overcome this.
But between the work situation and the feelings I still have for this gal, it was just too much. I am just wiped out and feel like total shit. I hate feeling this way, but I guess you can only overcome so much at one time. This too shall pass...but this day sucked a fucking fart.
Vitamin D. Much higher doses than the RDA, which is a pittance and will only barely stave off rickets. 1,000-2,000 IU per day, in my non-medically-licensed opinion.
I take that too 5000 IU a day
I take that too 5000 IU a day
Yeah, I myself am more like 7,000 IU a day, but I figured a conservative dose might be more appropriate for someone who hasn't already blood-tested as severely deficient like me. :)
Vada died
I never met Vada. But we bought this house from his fiance, the basement was a shrine to his football career and Hebe's room was decorated for his son. And they moved to a neighborhood where many of my friends live and became close with them, so i heard about him all the time. Strangely, our paths never crossed, despite 10 years of parties and get-togethers, but i always heard about his progress.
He died today, of lung cancer. An athlete and police officer, never a smoker. The battle has been nearly 4 years, but he never stood a chance -it was stage 4 when discovered. A stong man, a fighter. I wish I had met him.
Damn, sorry to hear that monster. Did they have any idea what caused it? Chemical exposure, or being around lots of second hand smoke, or something? A non-smoker getting lung cancer is a shitty lottery to win.
No, nothing. They cannot find any reason. The kicker is they think he was so fit, that's why it wasnt discovered until it was stage 4 -and it was discovered by accident then.
...we still get junk mail for Vada.
...and now a friend from the pool, a grandad and dad to close friends. :(
some days just suck.
Lung cancer is a zebra running down the street.
Wolf's user title is pissing me off. 19 years at the nuthouse.... Over just like that?
What the cock!?
So it would seem. Facebook also says unemployed....
What the fuck happened, wolf? Unless you don't wanna talk aboot et. And I'll stfu now just in case ya doona.
Wait, what?
Blimey.
Concerned people are concerned, but otherwise - what he said.
Also a concern - Big Sarge.
He was VERY down when he last posted which was days ago.
I am getting really hacked off with this never-fucking-ending eczema flare-up.
It's been going on for weeks. I've tried all my usual creams and potions. Am wearing bandages at night to increase the absorption rate and prevent unthinking scratching. Still fucking horrible. Head to toe.
I hate being like this. Aside from the obvious physical discomfort I feel so disgusting. My skin is sloughing away, and I know most people find that a revolting thing. I find it revolting. I don't want to be around anyone when I am like this. I leave a fucking trail. I can't wait til this is over.
I'm sorry to hear this D. Its unpredictable how long it will go on?
Dana, have you tried latex gloves and saran wrap to incease absorption? Uncomfortable as all hell, but it works sometimes.
Will it cheer you up if i call you Danana, as I originally typed accidentally?
Are the creams working but slowly, or making no damn difference at all? If the latter, maybe a trip to the doctor again? last time I had a flare like this (20 years ago thankfully), they sent me to the hospital to get sorted out. they gave me potassium permanganate soaks which helped soothe the skin and made it better prepared to absorp the medicine and moisturizers. Probably way out of date as a treatment, but the point is they went for a different approach than the GPs and it worked.
Do you take anti-histamine to help with the itching?
No idea :p
I went to the docs last week and got some medium strength corticosteroids. I am going to phone on Monday and suggest it is time to break out the big guns. It may also be time for antibiotics. With 70-80% coverage the risk of serious infection is quite high.
Dana, have you tried latex gloves and saran wrap to incease absorption? Uncomfortable as all hell, but it works sometimes.
Will it cheer you up if i call you Danana, as I originally typed accidentally?
Are the creams working but slowly, or making no damn difference at all? If the latter, maybe a trip to the doctor again? last time I had a flare like this (20 years ago thankfully), they sent me to the hospital to get sorted out. they gave me potassium permanganate soaks which helped soothe the skin and made it better prepared to absorp the medicine and moisturizers. Probably way out of date as a treatment, but the point is they went for a different approach than the GPs and it worked.
Do you take anti-histamine to help with the itching?
I've bene using tubigrip dressings and cotton gloves. Can't use latex as I react to it.
Am taking hydroxizine, which is an anti-histimine combined with a sedative. Three times a day. It helps but also makes me a little zombielike:p
I am fortunate in that there is a GP at our surgery who specializes in dermatology. I think it's time to pay her a visit. She and I usually work out a regime and then I just get the meds I need accordingly after that. Every so often, maybe once every year or so I have to go back and we work out what's what.
This is what the worst areas currently look like: apols if anybody is eating when they see this. I know it's pretty gross looking. Thank heavens for small mercies, my face just looks flushed and swollen, but you;d only spot that if you knew what I normally look like. To anybody else, I look like I caught the sun a little. TRhe left pic is my forearm, the right is obviously my foot :p
I don;t think I ever posted any pics of a flareup before. I never want the dwellar fellas to think of me like that. But hey, after seven years I might as well be brave ;P
I think it helps everyone realize the universality of suffering. Thank you for sharing yours. Continue to be brave.
Wolf's user title is pissing me off. 19 years at the nuthouse.... Over just like that?
What the cock!?
It boils down to "you are really smart, you really know your job, you are awesome, but you don't work and play well with others."
Shit, we're all in trouble then. 19 years and its a problem now?
Fuck, Wolf, that's horrible. How can 19 years of service and experience count for so little?
Wolf, you got fired?
Yeah, Dana, I used the cotton gloves and roll stuff too, but they in turn wick up moisture that would be better off going to the skin and plastic doesn't. There are latex-free versions -I am also allergic to Latex -and that gets worse as I get older. I am so sorry, that looks terrible. definitely time for a visit to the doctor.
Is there a pattern for the flare-ups? Is it seasonal allergy-related? Can you see an allergist?
I don't think it's seasonal allergies no. This can occur at any time of year. I think what set this particular one off was a bout of depression a couple of months ago, followed by 11 days of hotel living (starched sheets and towels, shower and no bath for oilatum, eating lots of fast food like a dickhead). It's been brewing for months but the London trip seemed to kick it into overdrive.
Once it's really kicked in it can be difficult to shift. I think the doc was too cautious in prescribing eumavate. Should have gone straight for betnovate. This is why I need to see the Doc who specialises in skin conditions. She's a lot less cautious.
I'll ask her about the plastic wrap. My one major concern with that is if it makes the skin sweat. Sweat makes me itch like someone's thrown itching powder all over me, even after it's been wiped away. It can start an itch that lasts for hours.
Thanks for the sympathy. I am feeling a hell of a lot better than i was when I posted earlier. Back to my sunny (ish) self :)
Just went for a great valley walk with the Pilster. Was hot as hell and it kicked the itch off a little, but I don;t care because it was so glorious. Enjoyed every minute of it as did He Who Must be Fed.
Also just spoke to my local 'farmer' friend and he says there'll be something smokable for this evening. Yey! That always helps put a better complexion onto my day *grins*
Dana that looks itchy as fuck. Sorry. Tried oil of cloves to numb the area?
I tried that once, years ago. The thing is, the itch isn't on the surface as such. It's deeper under the skin. The top layer already feels slightly numb. That's what makes the scratching so damaging. I can't just lightly scratch the skin and deal with the itch that way. All that does is make it worse. Sometimes I can't even feel it unless I really scratch hard. But it's only the surface that's numb. Underneath that it's sore and itchy. If that makes any kind of sense lol.
One of the problems with eczema remedies is that they tend to take an anaesthetic approach: lightly anaesthetise the skin surface. The trouble is, that itching is not actually related to pain, as was once believed. It involves different receptors in the brain. It is entirely possible to numb an area as far as pain is concerned but still feel the itch. All numbing it does is disable your ability to touch/scratch the itch.
One of the most horrible things I have experienced is having had anaesthetic for dental work and my lips left completely numb, but itching like hell. Can't even feel my fingers touching the area, but the itch was there. Untouchable.
I don;t think I ever posted any pics of a flareup before. I never want the dwellar fellas to think of me like that. But hey, after seven years I might as well be brave ;P
I'm glad you did. The way you describe it sounds awful, but putting a real image to it helps make it clear what you're really going through. I'm also glad your face had the decency to avoid the party, for your sake.
I tried that once, years ago. The thing is, the itch isn't on the surface as such. It's deeper under the skin. The top layer already feels slightly numb. That's what makes the scratching so damaging. I can't just lightly scratch the skin and deal with the itch that way. All that does is make it worse. Sometimes I can't even feel it unless I really scratch hard. But it's only the surface that's numb. Underneath that it's sore and itchy. If that makes any kind of sense lol.
One of the problems with eczema remedies is that they tend to take an anaesthetic approach: lightly anaesthetise the skin surface. The trouble is, that itching is not actually related to pain, as was once believed. It involves different receptors in the brain. It is entirely possible to numb an area as far as pain is concerned but still feel the itch. All numbing it does is disable your ability to touch/scratch the itch.
One of the most horrible things I have experienced is having had anaesthetic for dental work and my lips left completely numb, but itching like hell. Can't even feel my fingers touching the area, but the itch was there. Untouchable.
yeah, it does. Some times I get contact dermatitis from various stuff, especially if I am in the midst of a full blown hayfever festival then I am hyper sensitive to lots of things. One way I've found to satisfy the itching craving on my forearms w/o itching is to fill a basin with the hottest water I can stand and stick my arms into it. The sensation of scratching is similar. In fact I read somewhere recently that the same pain receptors are involved, the difference being that the response to heat is to pull away and to itching it is to move towards. Anyway, that can feel really satisfying. Not sure how the heat and water would affect the dry skin. I'm sorry you're going through this, wish I could help.
I knew a gal who got poison ivy on her brain and the only way she could scratch herself was to think about sandpaper.
F3 that would set mine right off.
From wikipedia:
In England, an estimated 5,773,700 or about one in every nine people have been diagnosed with the disease by a clinician at some point in their lives.[4]
What's up with that?
Yes, Danan, the plastic does increase the itch and the sweat from that, but the result is worth it. I find a night like that with dermovate on makes visible progress overnight. But I have to grit my teeth to do it, especially as it also prolongs the sting of when you put the cream on (you may not get that). Sometimes I use ice packs to reduce the itch. I use Clarytin for the itch too, but no sedative.
F3 that would set mine right off.
So you are a luke warm shower kind of guy?
F3 that would set mine right off.
me too! ice is good, but the water in itself is drying
Poison ivy on the brain??? How the fuck is that even possible?
Actually, I seem to recall you mentioning it before. I must have blocked it from my memory. That's like all my worst nightmares wrapped woth a feckin bow lol.
I musthave misread the report about pain receptors, but that kind of makes sense. The hot water. Oh yeah that helps. In fact I can't bear the sensation of water on my skin unless it is mad hot. I do that sometimres when my hands are really itchy. I'll be washing my hands or rinsing a cup out at the sink and I'll hold my hands under the hot tap (faucet) til it almost feels like a scald. Not terribly sensible in the long run, as it probably makes it worse overall. But for that moment of relief? Hell yeah. :p
So you are a luke warm shower kind of guy?
Cold and quick or [I'm not racist]Mexican[/racist am I]
From wikipedia:
In England, an estimated 5,773,700 or about one in every nine people have been diagnosed with the disease by a clinician at some point in their lives.[4]
What's up with that?
Seems about right to me. I read once that around 1 in 10 adults suffer from eczema. But apparently it's on the increase. Chronic eczema is less common though.
I went to school with a girl with chronic asthma and eczema.
She had skin like a crocodile. That's an awful thing to say, but it's how I saw it. And that was her normal state, not a flare-up, I guess from what her skin had been through in the past.
The girls in our year were kept behind for a special assembly because girls did not want to partner her in Games, in case they caught something when they touched.
It made me feel awful, even though I had never reacted that way to her. Our only real contact at that point was when we tried out for netball and she made the team (I didn't).
Fast forward four years and we were being handed our GCSE Drama practicals.
All I could think was "Please don't let me be paired/ be on the same team as her!"
Nothing to do with her skin, and she was quite a cool chick in many ways. But she was a lousy actress.
Sorry it's so very bad.
I think my worst experience ever was when I had hives from a still unspecified food allergy. The palms of my hands were the worst. One week of it drove me batshit, and that comes nowhere near close to what you live with.
Poison ivy on the brain??? How the fuck is that even possible?
the only way to scratch it was to
think about sandpaper...
think, Dana, think
Dana, you poor thing. The only skin affliction I suffer from is hypersensitivity to mosquito bites and mine are looking exceedingly manageable compared to what you're going through. Hope that the dermatologist on Monday can give you something that works and alleviates it.
Wolf, that really sucks. I'm with Griff on you writing your memoirs now.
sorry, wolf
sorry dana
damn
Well that Sucks Wolf !!!!
Who was the Whiney Little Byotch that Narked on ya ??
Feel Betterer Soon Dana !!!
I went to school with a girl with chronic asthma and eczema.
She had skin like a crocodile. That's an awful thing to say, but it's how I saw it. And that was her normal state, not a flare-up, I guess from what her skin had been through in the past.
The girls in our year were kept behind for a special assembly because girls did not want to partner her in Games, in case they caught something when they touched.
It made me feel awful, even though I had never reacted that way to her. Our only real contact at that point was when we tried out for netball and she made the team (I didn't).
Fast forward four years and we were being handed our GCSE Drama practicals.
All I could think was "Please don't let me be paired/ be on the same team as her!"
Nothing to do with her skin, and she was quite a cool chick in many ways. But she was a lousy actress.
Sorry it's so very bad.
I think my worst experience ever was when I had hives from a still unspecified food allergy. The palms of my hands were the worst. One week of it drove me batshit, and that comes nowhere near close to what you live with.
lol. I was the subject of at least one such mini-assembly :p After a particularly bad few months when I was ostracised completely. Nobody would pair with me in sports, allow me onto their teams, or even allow me to sit next to them in class.
That girl's crocodile skin was probably due to the constant need for corticosteroids. I still have a little of that around my hands, but nowhere near as bad as when I was a kid. They used to say mine looked like a lizard.
None of this is as bad as when I was a kid. That's probably why I am so impatient with a bad flare-up these days. Just not as used to it. This is bad now, but that was near to my baseline for most of childhood and early teens.
Thank FSM I only have to put up with the really nasty shit for a few days or weeks at a time now.
wolf and DanaC, I sympathize with both of you. That sucks. And Dana, I'm glad you posted the pictures. It really shows what you are dealing with.
I'm glad I did too. It's something I hide from all but my closest family and friends. It feels a little like I've been hiding from you all too, having only ever let you see me when I am at my clearest.
Not that I intend to make a practice of these pics ;p You've seen what it looks like, that's enough. But at least now you have. That's as much me as the chick in the nsfw shot is. At different times.
@Monnie: sorry for your losses :(
@Wolf: WTF? Want revenge ideas? We got a thread going. I hope you find something better. Maybe writing your memoirs is a good idea. You'd just have to do so in such a way to protect yourself from legal backlash.
@Dana: Oh my FSM. You poor dear. If the hot water helps, have you tried just a really hot pack? You don't want to burn yourself obviously, but it might give the benefit of relieving the itch without the drying of the water? Plus it would last longer. I would think ice packs would help too but I don't have much experience with that sorta thing.
My poor sis, she was doing better because they put her on embrel (injectable immune suppressant), but she's got an infection and can't take the embrel or one of her other meds, methotrexate, which is also a chemotherapy drug and her antibiotics increase its toxicity.
If the sun doesn't come out some time very soon Imma gonna LOSE IT!
three weeks of unmitigated DREAR and GLOOM.
It's making me fookin' NUTS!
Focus on lunch, babe, focus on the lunch :)
It boils down to "you are really smart, you really know your job, you are awesome, but you don't work and play well with others."
Damn! Just like that? After 19 years? That is awful of your employer! Any other jobs on the horizon? Can you afford to just take some time to regroup? Sorry to hear, Wolf. :(
My mom passed away this morning. I don't want to go into details, since I'm still processing this all and since I don't use a handle other peoples privacy is involved.
Funeral on Thursday, which is late by Jewish standards, courtesy of Passover. Monday was too soon for everyone to get together and Tuesday and Wednesday are the more religious portions of Passover so no burials then.
Also because of Passover, the shivah will be cut short, but we're supposed to go ahead with the Seder.......
It's sort of like being told that since your relative died on Easter there can't be a wake but you're supposed to have Easter dinner.
First seder tomorrow night is going to be strange.
P.S. Sorry to hear about your job Wolf.
Rich, I'm very sorry for your loss, and that Passover is making it harder.
RIP, sorry for your loss Rich. The loss of a parent is difficult. My wife has lost both of her's, I have lost my father and I fear my mom is not far behind. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family in this difficult time.
I'm so sorry Rich.
My sympathies.
Aw sorry for the loss Rich. I'm not familiar with Jewish traditions, but that sounds kinda suck :(. Maybe you can honor her later with a follow-up memorial? Kinda hard to get everyone back together again, but the people who really matter will take the time to be there.
Mildly upsetting: Just watched the Nat Geo special on the Tsunami loaded with tons of home video of the actual event at the moment of impact. Moving. Upsetting. My heart goes out to those people and their future.
Sorry for your Loss Rich .
Sorry to hear the bad news Rich.
So sorry Rich. I imagine the expectation of continuing with the ongoing religious observances and celebrations adds to the sense of the surreal right now.
Warm thoughts are with you, mate.
Sorry for your loss, Rich.
So sorry for your loss, Rich.
Sorry to hear about your mom, Rich. :(
This is a day for ducks or platypus :(
Having a really hard time being motivated to get my work done for this semester. I think some depression has creeped in.
Oh me too kiddo, me too. Where the frig did my enthusiasm and capacity to focus go to? It's like I am physically incapable of making myself work. And when I do it's fragmented and nothing hangs together. Reading the books just makes my eyes want to close...
You are not alone m'dear. Recognising that it's depression is probably a good sign that you're on the way back up soon, at a guess.
Well, I just realized that I never turned in a proposal for my paper, thats an immediate half off the grade, so now I'm not even sure its worth writing the damn thing. I've been so distracted by my own self loathing. The paper is due tomorrow. :(
Ouch. Fuck me, that's a sucker punch. How much of your final grade is the paper worth?
Thanks for the messages.
The funeral is tomorrow, followed by an on-again off-again
shivah schedule at my sisters house.
Sometimes members of the family will go out to dine together after a funeral, although this is not in accordance with any Jewish custom. Not much chance of that happening with Passover, since it's pretty much impossible to find a restaurant that even comes close to serving Passover meals outside of downtown Philly.
I'm going with my dad to services at my sister's synagogue on Friday night. Shivah is I think Thurs evening, Friday day, Saturday evening. This is according to the Rabbi.
Ouch. Fuck me, that's a sucker punch. How much of your final grade is the paper worth?
Almost 1/3rd
Well, I just realized that I never turned in a proposal for my paper, thats an immediate half off the grade, so now I'm not even sure its worth writing the damn thing. I've been so distracted by my own self loathing. The paper is due tomorrow. :(
Try and write it no matter what. It'd be a shame to fail the course by a couple of marks that you might have picked up by handing in the paper.
Can you ask for special consideration because of the things that've been happening in your life lately? I don't know what the rules are over there, but here you can often get that if you've had major health or relationship issues that've affected you.
Try and write it no matter what. It'd be a shame to fail the course by a couple of marks that you might have picked up by handing in the paper.
Can you ask for special consideration because of the things that've been happening in your life lately? I don't know what the rules are over there, but here you can often get that if you've had major health or relationship issues that've affected you.
I can kinda. The prof and dean have to agree to let me drop with an Incomplete because of an health issue. Problem is, its more stress than anything. Sure, I have a bad thyroid and headaches, but I'm on meds. I probably don't have a good enough case. My prof might let me extend my deadline, but he did that last year for me too, I'd hate to ask him to do it again.
I am trying, I have 2 sentences written and am stuck again. :(
You might feel like a sook doing it, but you should do it anyway. It's your future not his, and I'm sure he's had to help students like yourself before. It's part of his job.
Heh, just found out that the med my doc put me on for my headaches is commonly used as an anti-depressant. Funny.
Ali, I understand what you're saying. Its just not how I grew up, its against every fiber of my being. I'd almost rather fail. I know, I know thats worse. I'll talk to him tomorrow maybe, its just so close to the end of the semester, I feel like if I can just get myself past this paper, and the paper in Psych, and the 6 other writing assignments....
Oh geeze, am I fucked.
Me either MTP. I was brought up to just get the job done, and if I hadn't prepared myself properly it was me who should wear the consequences, so I know where you're coming from.
I only asked for SC once when I was at uni, and that was when my Mum died. The stupid lecturer I had denied it (even though she died the day before the final exam) and then I was just so down I just said fuck it and let myself fail the course. In hindsight that was a stupid decision knowing that if I'd appealed I would have won because the counsellor was on my side, but at the time, I wasn't really seeing things clearly.
Anyway, I hope you can get yourself sorted out. It'll be worth it in the long run.
Me either MTP. I was brought up to just get the job done, and if I hadn't prepared myself properly it was me who should wear the consequences, so I know where you're coming from.
I only asked for SC once when I was at uni, and that was when my Mum died. The stupid lecturer I had denied it (even though she died the day before the final exam) and then I was just so down I just said fuck it and let myself fail the course. In hindsight that was a stupid decision knowing that if I'd appealed I would have won because the counsellor was on my side, but at the time, I wasn't really seeing things clearly.
Anyway, I hope you can get yourself sorted out. It'll be worth it in the long run.
Yeah, I've decided that if there is a G-d, that it is against me. I had to leave the library I was at to go get books from another library. At the other library I found that I had left my laptop's power cable at the first library. So I drove back to the first library, only to get sick in my car as soon as I parked. Fortunately I have a loving and nearby mom who went and got my power cable while I drove home to clean up. I'm still feeling pretty awful though.
Hello Rich
I'm very sad to hear the news about your mom. I'm sure the complications make things feel worse. I can't change anything that has already happened, but I offer you my support and I'd like to help you in any way I can.
Yours,
Rich, I've been away the last few days. I'm sorry to hear about your mom.
So sorry to hear you've lost your Mum, Rich.
And then the added stress of it being at the worst time of the year.
A friend of my Mum's lost her Dad on Christmas Eve.
Even if it seems like nothing could be worse than losing a parent, it was worse for her, with everything closed and having to pass on news that spoiled other families' celebratons.
Faaaahhk.
I go to register for the summer term right as the computer system opens this morning. As I'm furiously typing in section numbers, clicking the ones I want, advancing through the system, I can see the seats filling up in real time with each refresh of the page.
And then comes the big red error message: You must have a Granted Petition to register for [critical prereq course that MUST happen this summer or the whole plan is thrown off by a year.] Apparently for this one course, I was somehow supposed to know that I needed permission to register for it.
I did get into my other courses--not on the ideal schedule, but I got them. But none of it will matter if I can't get into this one fundamental class. I've emailed the department chair like it says I'm supposed to, to get my "petition" granted. But of course he's not going to respond until Monday at the earliest.
My mom passed away this morning. I don't want to go into details, since I'm still processing this all and since I don't use a handle other peoples privacy is involved.
Rich, I'm so sorry. I'm seeing this for the first time. You and your family are in my thoughts.
My mom passed away this morning.
I'm so sorry for your loss, Rich. Peace be with you.
Staff briefing this morning.
One of our school volunteers has two boys at our school. He is a very committed parent and we always say hello to eachother as we were volunteering at the same time, although I was doing full days and he was taking readers at set times. I often see him around Aylesbury in his van and always wave.
His brother has just been sent to gaol for sending sexually explicit texts to a 15 year old.
Link
Of course it does not reflect in any way on the man who volunteers at our school. It's just I feel for the family, especially knowing one of the boys well.
I haven't used any names in this post, but of course they are in the link which is on the internet and it was reported in the local paper. It's not about hiding the identity of the man, but his brother has the same surname and I'd like to respect his privacy at least.
13 April 2011, 10:49 am
A 44-year-old man has been jailed for three-and-a-half months after sending a series of explicit text messages to a 15-year-old boy on work experience at his firm.
xxx, of xxx Road, Aylesbury, was sentenced at Aylesbury Crown Court on Monday (11/4) after admitting a charge of causing or inciting a child under the age of 16 to engage in sexual activity.
xxx, who runs First Choice Gas, took on a 15-year-old boy for a two-week work experience placement in spring 2010. The scheme is run through schools and Buckinghamshire County Council.
Within days of the boy starting the placement, xxx started to send him explicit text messages of a sexual nature. These messages became more extreme during the period of the placement.
On the evening of the final day of the placement, the victim’s father discovered the text messages on his son’s phone and the matter was reported to police. xxx’s phone was subsequently seized and evidence of the messages was recovered.
In court, it was heard how xxx had been under a great deal of stress at the time of the offence and had lost his sense of judgement but had expressed sorrow for his actions.
On passing sentence, Judge Sheridan called xxx’s behaviour “disgusting” and said the young victim must have “suffered horribly in his own mind”. He said xxx had exhibited “criminal behaviour of the lowest and disgusting sort” and had a duty to protect the young people of Aylesbury and the work experience scheme. He added that the “fabulously successful scheme had received a terrible blow”.
Investigating officer Det Con Lucy Jarrett said: “The young victim has shown a great deal of courage throughout this investigation, which has been supported by his family.
“Thames Valley Police and Buckinghamshire County Council will continue to work together to ensure that young people are protected and any similar reports of inappropriate behaviour will always be dealt with robustly.”
and said the young victim must have “suffered horribly in his own mind”.
I doubt it. But there's just no such thing as consensual at that age, no matter how much the 15-year-old might have wished there were. I wonder how many months away he was from his 16th birthday?
Yeah, I don't want to get into that sort of questioning.
The fact it was discovered by a parent.
(My niece and all that...)
Always comes down harder on male-male interactions.
But given the reaction of the judge that heard the whole trial I'm assuming it was a genuine case of abuse.
Well if it was, that's awful and he deserves the jail time. Sorry that your coworker might be caught in any crossfire, though. :(
Cold sores. Plural.
Woke up this morning feeling like my lip was a birthing sac for some bloated poisonous insect, which was trying to scratch a hole to be born through.
Oh sorry, I mean a "tingling sensation".
I have at least three separate cold sores. There may be more.
My lip is throbbing savagely, and feels as if it's swollen to bad-implant proportions. Of course when I look in the mirror it looks normal size, but I am not fooled.
This will end up being a holy mess when it all erupts.
Nice to know I have something to look forward to.
bummer, sundae. what triggers the outbreaks, have you any idea?
I think they are spread through the Cellar. I had one when I went on the big boat a few weeks ago.
My mom passed away this morning. .
Sorry, I totally missed this, Rich. You and yours have my sympathy.
Upset is the wrong word, stressing me out is more like it...
I have my interview today. I have "test anxiety", I get progressively more stressed out as the moment of truth approaches. Then there comes a time when I just relax when I realize I'm as prepared as I'm going to be. Then the test, the interview, the date, the delivery, etc.
Right now, it's just moving straight upward.
Wish me luck please.
Upset is the wrong word, stressing me out is more like it...
I have my interview today. I have "test anxiety", I get progressively more stressed out as the moment of truth approaches. Then there comes a time when I just relax when I realize I'm as prepared as I'm going to be. Then the test, the interview, the date, the delivery, etc.
Right now, it's just moving straight upward.
Wish me luck please.
Good luck, BigV!:ipray::stpaddy:
You don't need luck - you've worked hard and you have everything you need to do well.
good luck V!!!!
rich, sorry to hear that man. prayers and thoughts are with you!
and sundae: get a prescription for zovirax cream. it clears up cold sores quickly. soon as you feel the tingle just start applying it.
Best wishes and much mojo coming your way, V. You'll do great - I just know it!
Shameful shit on the Cellar yesterday.
I don't care how great a person merc is deep deep deep deep deep deep deep deep deep deep deep deep deep deep down.
We lost another bastion of viewpoints from someone who also has been in positions to know a little bit about the political process. Remember Redux. Will jill meet the same fate? Will constant badgering, calling her fat, a bitch, so that she defends herself, result in a pass for merc and a ban on jill?
Stay tuned for scenes from the next Peyton Cellar.
Really, even a blind hog finds an acorn from time to time. But he's a great guy. :headshake
Disgusted,
Willing to Learn, Unwilling to Bow.
I think he needs medication. This is cyclic. May be a case of physician, heal thyself. I can't see why Jill would get banned. But I guess you're saying there was no reason for Redux to be banned either.
I think we can all see what a twonk he's being, and many have said so. I don't see that he is getting a pass -except maybe from one poster.
I think/hope Jill is strong enough to stay and learn to ignore him when he need ignoring and keep slapping him down when he needs it, if she can be bothered.
monster, you and I both have our moments. I would say we're pretty outspoken. (Understatement of the Year?) But I don't think you can be accused of being disrespectful for no reason.
I hope jill sticks around too. As glatt said, she can certainly hold her own. But will she want to?
Remember Redux. Will jill meet the same fate?
I can't see why Jill would get banned. But I guess you're saying there was no reason for Redux to be banned either.
If she
requests it, like he did. He asked to have all his posts.
monster, you and I both have our moments. I would say we're pretty outspoken. (Understatement of the Year?) But I don't think you can be accused of being disrespectful for no reason.
Bullshit. She turned me into a newt.
Bullshit. She turned me into a newt.
You got betterbetterbetter!
See? You two are ganging up on me.
it's just our way of flirting. You ever had twins before?
Feel honored. Most don't pass the monster, I mean the muster.
(Or mustard. I know someone on here said that once, someone didn't pass the mustard.) :lol2:
You know he's called footfootfoot because he has to buy socksocksock ...nudge nudge nudge....
Where's the royal piss boy?
I'm very disappointed in someone because I had faith that he could do what he said he's gonna do. And he's just not gonna even talk about. I'm going to be even more disappointed if he comes up excuses for it later. I'm talking in circles? Yeah, I am. Anyways, here I am pretending I'm not gonna let it bother me too much, when it really does. Well, gonna enjoy a good cup of coffee then clean up. Moving my body helps take my mind off of things.
I don't think anyone here has a clean slate as far as poor behaviour goes - except maybe glatt and a small group of sweeties - so for people to think that I should be disloyal to someone who has shown me personally, great compassion and understanding simply doesn't compute. If it makes me a bad person and guilty by association so be it, but don't for one minute thing that I approve of everything posted by merc.
Over the last couple of years, I have been trying to focus on the positive aspects of everyone here. I've tried not to engage in the shit slinging that goes on around here, but at the same time, I'm not going to sit around idly and watch people speculate about stuff that they're clearly remembering with a pretty one sided view.
Anyway, it'd be nice if we could all just try and get along now and then.
I'm very disappointed in someone because I had faith that he could do what he said he's gonna do. And he's just not gonna even talk about. I'm going to be even more disappointed if he comes up excuses for it later. I'm talking in circles? Yeah, I am. Anyways, here I am pretending I'm not gonna let it bother me too much, when it really does. Well, gonna enjoy a good cup of coffee then clean up. Moving my body helps take my mind off of things.
I don't know what this is about Tulip, but it sounds sad. I hope your friend can find his way again with whatever it is that's gone wrong.
Maybe I'm just expecting and hoping too much. I just care. Oh well...no biggie. Just wanted to get it off my chest. Thanks for your words, Ali. :)
i'll man up. i told her that i wouldn't drink for a week and i did tuesday. i'm battling some inner daemons and i'm not ready to fight them yet. no excuses. this isn't an easy task by any means.
that is all.
Well, you've got a good friend in Tulip there plt. You're very lucky. Hopefully her support will make it more possible for you to achieve your goal. :)
I think he needs medication. This is cyclic. May be a case of physician, heal thyself. I can't see why Jill would get banned. But I guess you're saying there was no reason for Redux to be banned either.
I think we can all see what a twonk he's being, and many have said so. I don't see that he is getting a pass -except maybe from one poster.
I think/hope Jill is strong enough to stay and learn to ignore him when he need ignoring and keep slapping him down when he needs it, if she can be bothered.
I predict that Jill and Merc will end up friends.
Hollywood got Brangelina and TomKat, the Cellar gets Jerc.
One of my 3 best friends in the world (only since we were 2) went in yesterday to have a titanium shell inserted into his skull. His brain has only been covered by skin since November after a major injury. 36 years old, married, two year old daughter.
He has not woken up, has at least one bleed, keeps seizing, and they can't tell whether he's building to a stroke or has already had it. Not good.
:(
Sending warm thoughts to your friend, lookout.
Sorry to hear that LO. I can relate. Is he in a drug-induced coma or ???
I thought that was SOP for at least 24 hours after that type of surgery.
Not in this case. I don't know why, although he has had troubles with his med mix over the last 6 months. I do know that he isn't responding at this point though.
Shit, lookout. That sucks so hard. I hope you hear some good news soon.
Damn. Thoughts and prayers to all involved.
Sorry Lookout. That's sucks. I hope he pulls through just fine.
Prayers for your friend, Lookout.
Sending you and your friend every best wish.
They just rushed him in to reopen him and remove the titanium plate.
hope everything works out! thoughts and prayers are with you and your friend, sir.
My best wishes for your friend has wings . . .
oh ugh, here's hoping all is ok
Gahhhh - Good luck - We went through multiple surgeries as well.
lookout, I hope your buddy is ok.. seizures are so scary. and strokes, .. don't get me started.
Fuck man. Well like I always say, at least we aren't living with the medical technology of 100 years ago.
With the technology of a hundred years ago he'd have died six months ago. A very large part of me believes his family would be better off if he had.
I would absolutely miss him, but i know he'd never want to live like this and he'd never want his poor wife to spend the next 30+ years in this situation.
Just heard he's out and alive. Minus the titanium plate and a couple blood clots, plus a couple tubes. Brain is "swollen, wet, and tense" and he is still seizing... but alive.
Sorry to hear about your friend's troubles. I hope for the best outcome for all concerned.
Christ, Lookout, what a horrible thing.
I hope he recovers. Sending positive vibes.
There is a special place in hell for a woman named Rhonda Gross. She's really sure that "as a mom," she understands "where I'm coming from." I'm really sure that, as a mom, I want to burn her house down.
It's *possible* you're both right, but if that's the case, she'd better have a head start.
I'm really sure that, as a mom, I want to burn her house down.
Merc can probably make that happen... jus sayin'. :flamer:
Only update is that he is still alive and has not had any more seizures as they've weened him off the anti-seizure meds.
that's a start ... being alive is a good beginning.
J's dad's ex and mother of his half sister Rosie, has been diagnosed with breast cancer. She's really scared. One of her closest friends (I mentioned it att he time, it was quite shocking to us all) died of cancer a few years ago. Apparently though, wheras Ronnie had a very fast moving form of cancer which is almost impossible to treat, Romy's is the less dangerous variety and hopefully this means her chances of survival are good. Though her age (I think she's in her early late 50s/early 60s) might go against her.
I can only imagne what Rosie (her daughter, J's kid sister) is going through right now.
Romy, along with J's dad and stepmother, was a huge influence on me in my late teens. J, his dad and his stepmum were all living at Romy's house awaiting the completion of their new house, when I met him. Had many happy Sunday lunches with them all.
I know it sounds really cliched to say that someone loves life. We all love life even if we don't realise it. But Romy is one of those vibrant and engaging people. An actor, director and singer of great talent. Passionate, artistic and political. A true child of the 60s.
I just hope she's going to be ok.
Fuck cancer.
In time you'll recognise that love is larger than life
I don't think I ever will. Not now.
Sorry. A line from a song made me quite tearful tonight.
After many tests and consultations it has been decided my friend is no longer in there. Today they will remove all external support and move him to hospice where he will be kept as comfortable as possible until he passes.
I'm so sorry lookout. There just aren't words for this. :(
I'm sad but not devastated. I know he would have wanted to live out his life at the level that was expected even before the problems associated with this surgery. There were 3 of us who have literally been the closest of friends for 35 years. I was always the one expected to go first, but he beat me to this just as he did with most things in life. I've got 35 years of great memories and a load of Guinness to work my way through tonight.
Lookout - I'm so sorry.
DanaC - fuck cancer.
Sundae - hugs.
I'm sad but not devastated. I know he would have wanted to live out his life at the level that was expected even before the problems associated with this surgery. There were 3 of us who have literally been the closest of friends for 35 years. I was always the one expected to go first, but he beat me to this just as he did with most things in life. I've got 35 years of great memories and a load of Guinness to work my way through tonight.
What lovely thoughts. To love and be loved, that is what is important in this life.
Dammit, lookout. I'm so sorry. Hugs to you, and to his wife and kid as well.
Lookout - I am so very sorry for his family, friends and all of those who loved him.
He will live on in a sense through you. I hope you take some solace in knowing that.
That is one of life's greatest accomplishments, to live on in others after you pass.
Thoughts and prayers to all.
Shit, Lookout. that sucks. I'm so sorry.
I'm so sorry, Lookout. That really sucks.
Oh Lookout, I'm so sorry. What an awful, awful thing.
I hate this fucking thread.
Sorry lookout. That's very sad news.
I hate this fucking thread.
Yeah, but it does keep us real.
Sorry Lookout.
That Sucks Look out ,
Remember the good time dude
Sorry to follow a really awful upset with something trivial.
I've just seen that the preview screening of Torchwood: Miracle Day (plus panel discussion incliding Russel T Davies, Eye Myles and JB afterwards) at the BFI is sold out.
I knew it would sell out quickly, but when I checked on Thursday there were still about 30% seats free.
I already owe Mum & Dad for the vet bill, so I couldn't ask them for more.
I just kept my fingers crossed there might be a single seat, towards the back, still available on payday...?
It was always unlikely, and after all it's only been a few days that I've been thinking about it, but I feel really upset. My whole stomach has dropped and the light has gone out of my day. I honestly feel like something longed planned and hoped for has been cancelled last minute.
Maybe I need to get my medication reviewed.
This:
http://annarbor.com/news/hockey-player-ian-jenkins-dies/
15-year-old. Didn't know him but could so easily be a kid I know or my kid. Unclear exactly what happened, but bets are on horsing around like 15yo kids do, hit his head, freak accident/repercussions, now dead. It shouldn't do but it seems to add to it that he's a hockey goalie like my kid and just got signed to the OHL like my kid dreams of...... makes me want to wrap my kids in cotton wool to keep them safe, but that's no life to live either.
Sucks. We've all done stupid stuff like that as teenagers. As a parent, you can try to give your kids the tools to make good decisions, but they are going to make mistakes. And it's just brutal dumb luck that sometimes the bad decisions have serious consequences, and sometimes they don't. It's terrifying.
I did, however, just email my goalie son and tell him not to keep jumping on his knees like he did in the puddle last night. Some stupidity maybe we can help protect against? I haven't given up hope. But I am saddened today.
theres a couple of churches that could cover the cost of me getting from this city,to where i would really prefer to be. i am waiting for a soup kitchen to spend a few dollars more and get me out of here, if the woman who is in charge, would take the time and have listened to what i offered,i would have had my train ticket and i would be typing my deptarture date, on my yahoo page.
If anyone is interested in the journey the great
CWB has taken us on in the last 6 months you can see his wife's blog.
I read much of that last week & read the rest today.
So sad. I feel for the daughter, but maybe since she is only two that it won't be as hard or - I dunno. Maybe that makes it worse.
I'm sorry for everyone on this thread but misery loves company>
My working cow dog is right now having surgery for a bowel obstruction. They gave him a 60% chance. :sniff:
I'm sorry, Nirvana. Is that the one that tangled with a tornado?
I read much of that last week & read the rest today.
So sad. I feel for the daughter, but maybe since she is only two that it won't be as hard or - I dunno. Maybe that makes it worse.
Agreed, it is very sad. The 2 y.o. won't remember a thing.
I'm sorry, Nirvana. Is that the one that tangled with a tornado?
Yes crap :thepain:
Yes crap :thepain:
This must have been prophetic! Ok vet update they were going to start the surgery when my dog had a bowel movement from the enemas they gave earlier. He is crapping bone pieces and junk. They are continuing to give him enemas and walking him around. They will keep him over night. This seems like better news better than surgery. Surgery comes with peritonitis risks. :)
Not sure I ever cheered for a dog to poo before, but ....
YAYAYAYAYAYAYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYY
twisted bowel?
(fucking bone eating dogs, gah.. how do you say "chew twenty times before swallowing" in rotweiller anyhow?!)
I'm so glad Suede's OK.
I remember a horrible night of emergency vet visit and operations on one of the westis when he was a pup. Got himself into a half eaten bucket of KFC.
Fuckin chicken bones are the debbil*
*as bri would say.
"twisted bowel"
I think 6 years of eating squirrel and raccoon. He has a "bone nest" in there. I just got back from the vet > I went to give him some slippery elm bolus' so that in the morning we are hoping for a smooth move. My vets are not opposed to my herbal remedies thankfully. They are doing enemas at the other end. Surgery is still on the table unless we have more movement by morning. Fingers and toes crossed POOOOOOOP! :)
Thanks for the ah encouragement.
Nirvana's Doggie,
We hope for poop. Pref'rably
Lavender Scented.
Suede has gone to surgery I am not very optimistic :sniff:
Good luck, Suede! Hugs, Nirvana!
Is it a twisted bowel? Is that the current diagnosis?
Twisted bowel is a medical emergency, Suede has obstruction. Canine intestine is about 3 feet he has about 10 inches of obstruction, so resection is out of the question. So if any of his tissue is necrotic or irreparable he will be euthanized :(
Thanks for your comments I am so sad :(
Awee - I'm hoping for the best.
I hope suede comes out ok.
augh... so sorry Nirvana.
I sincerely hope the obstruction is removed and he's healthy soon.
Mum.
As usual.
No idea what this shit-fit is about.
She came up to get a book - which is hindsight is not a good thing as it means she isn't watching TV. It might be that Dad is watching something she isn't interested in, which is very selfish of him. But she seemed fine - I asked her about an email I sent her and she replied with interest.
Then there was slap bang wallop downstairs, slamming doors. I heard Dad say, "I'll do it! I do it after [inaudible]"
Mum, "I'LL DO IT! Like I do everything in this fucking place! Funny how I am the only person who noticed it! Everyone else walking right past it!"
I haven't ignored anything that needed doing. It might be something along the lines of catsick or poo? No - Dad would never suggest a delay on that. So I'm baffled. Just staying out of it, even if I have been implicated.
It doesn't seem to have reached storm out proportions. But another wrong word from Dad might get her there. I certainly expect her to come upstairs and shut herself in their room to "read". AKA stew and brood.
Oh - just remembered they are house-sitting as of tomorrow. So she can't go off to punish Dad - she'd never let the clients down that way. Wow - no wonder she's fuming.
The air conditioning doesn't work.
The mower I bought used doesn't start and the grass is 8" tall.
I'm going to lose the house to foreclosure.
And I have a bad headache.
fucking forclosure. my current boogeyman. aaauuuugh.
The word foreclosure is very scary. I'm sorry to hear that more than one person here is facing it. :(
Shit UT and Big V, that's truly horrible :(
I'm going to lose the house to foreclosure.
Talk to your lender. Everything I've read says the lender does not want to take back a home.
damn - the shit just keeps piling up for dwellars.
Wishing each of you the best
Well I got the mower started.
Misery, Misery go away
The Cellarites don't want to play!
Hey Nirvana, thanks and all. But I'd just as soon see your name on the happy today thread, ok?
J gave me Advil for the headache and it worked.
Shouldn't that be in the happy thread UT? ;)
I'm really sorry about your house. Is there nothing you can do?
There are options but you have fewer options when you have no identifiable income (a starter business is a bad idea if you want to keep a mortgage), I don't know what will really go down at this point. I've been in this situation for a long time now and I'm so dead tired of panic, despair, money arguments, etc. It's been a long hard slog and not at all worth it. This is just a goddamn house and I should have gotten rid of it after the divorce.
Sometimes selling up is a better idea that's for sure. Renting for a time till you get financial again wouldn't be a bad idea would it?
Yes and it would be nice for J to reduce her hour commute. We will see what happens.
Best of luck, and once you make a decision all will go smoothly and you'll feel a lot better once it's behind you.
Probably better to sell than to loose, like Ali said.
Suede's vet bill, worth every penny, but damn ouch! :neutral:
Suede's vet bill, worth every penny, but damn ouch! :neutral:
Yeah, well whatever you do, don't buy a suit from that vet. (s)he sews for shit.
Yes and it would be nice for J to reduce her hour commute. We will see what happens.
Are there any tax breaks for people who have investment property in the US?
Just first property, there is a mortgage deduction on tax and it's been a huge help in the past.
Yeah, well whatever you do, don't buy a suit from that vet. (s)he sews for shit.
:lol: I thought the same thing!
[COLOR="Silver"]Should I be laffin in the upsetting thread?[/COLOR]
:lol: I thought the same thing!
[COLOR="Silver"]Should I be laffin in the upsetting thread?[/COLOR]
You've got to laugh if you don't want to cry
That Nirv has a lot of dog.
Just to keep everything in the same thread I'll make the update here for those who have been following my friend's progress.
The mighty
CWB has left his body.
While I'm sad he is gone I'm glad his suffering is over and his wife can begin to build a new life for her and their daughter.
That's very sad news lookout. I'm sorry for your loss. xx
UPDATE:
Suede is in a crate in my kitchen bunged to another crate next to Victor with a blanket in between because Suede likes to move his crate across the floor using his wedge-like head while growling at Victor when he is in his crate. Just a hunch but I think he is pretty much on the mend. ;)
Sorry lookout. I read some of the blog and it is truly, truly a gut-wrenching thing.
I hope he is at peace and pray for his family to find it as well.
He was an absolute one of a kind. There were three of us that have been together since we were 2. CWB had a pretty abrasive personality but a heart of gold. Probably 20 years ago while defending him in conversation I stated that he was an asshole, but he's our asshole. After all this time I still can't come up with a more appropriate description for his place in our crew.
I miss him a lot, but he has left me 35 years of great memories. Can't ask for more from a friend.
:comfort: [COLOR="White"].[/COLOR]
Sorry to hear of the loss lookout
Sorry to hear, lookout. That was a beautiful tribute website.
I agree, really beautiful. So sorry for your loss Lookout. Am thinking of you and your friend's family.
I have just returned from "Kroger-ing" (grocery shopping, for our BBC buddies)
I feel as though I have been butt-f*cked in the mouth.
$166.56 - I'll have to make it last allllll month.
Day-um.
snip -- Probably 20 years ago while defending him in conversation I stated that he was an asshole, but he's our asshole. After all this time I still can't come up with a more appropriate description for his place in our crew.
I miss him a lot, but he has left me 35 years of great memories. Can't ask for more from a friend.
Nor could he.
re: "our asshole".
Enjoy.Sepp bloody Blatter is making me REALLY CROSS.
Oh blah blah blah "I am the Captain of the ship" blah blah blah "difficult waters"!
Yes. You were the Captain when the crew were taking bungs!
You didn't know your crew were corrupt, apparently.
Well if you didn't, you're a lousy Captain.
And if you did, you're a liar and a cheat and a lousy Captain.
Do you see?
Having to elect a man because he is the only man standing is not an act of support. You are a despot and the closed world of FIFA is a joke. You don't even understand the word "crisis"? Tcha.
That's why you delivered your speech in French, when the international language of football is English.
You smashed the English press for their treatment of FIFA and of you.
What was it you said?
FIFA was wounded, you were slapped?
Something like that.
They fucking deserved it.
Two representatives are now under investigation for taking bribes!
When you were Captain of the ship! You got slapped? You're lucky that's all you got mate.
If you were English I'd like to see the Queen haul you through Traitors' Gate for your twisty turny behaviour.
Oh but wait...
If you were English we might have had the World Cup here.
Rather than Qatar. Where under-investigation Mohamed bin Hammam comes from.
Which submitted the lowest ranking bid.
Where they've had to change the TIME OF YEAR it's held because of the heat - I mean fuck all the traditional schedules of European football.
Cunt.
There were a lot of things I had to google in the above post but it was totally worth it.
I feel smarter for knowing Sundae.
I also wouldn't want to piss her off. :D
Wow, and I was just mildly bummed that Coach Tressel resigned. :(
I heard a good idea though: Tressel as coach of the Cincinnati Bungles, I mean Bengals.
Well said Sundae - Its a travesty that the Wc is going to be help in that godforsaken hole of a cuntry (sp). I agree wholeheartedly!
Hey - cool!
I thought I would be just shouting for echoes airing a football (soccer) issue here.
Thanks for the responses.
I looked up Sepp Blatter on Google (UK) earlier.
One of the top drop down options was Sepp Blatter bell-end.
We Brits might not be as sophisticated as our continental cousins, but we certainly cut to the chase.
ha ha that is some funny right there. I had to look up bellend, but I loved the credulous wikipedia source for his bio and award.
Loving the hackers/ pranksters.
FIFA is in a shambolic state of corruption and incompetance, and Blatter has been in charge for over a decade (I think). Buck stops with him.
Great word that: bell-end.
While the AC repair guy was on his way ($600 bad fan motor), the dryer gave out (no heat likely bad element $400 replacement)
3% pay cut coming in July. Grrrr
3% pay cut coming in July. Grrrr
Considering the adages "We pretend to work and they pretend to pay us" and "We work just hard enough to keep from being fired and they pay us just enough to keep us from quitting"
How much less pretending does 3% come out to and how much easier will your day be?
Sorry to hear that. I don't think you could make 3% up in pens, pads, and paper clips.
How much less pretending does 3% come out to and how much easier will your day be?
Days will be no easier. Our case loads have gone dramatically up in the past year, with less time to finish the work due to mandatory furlough days (one per month). Now we will work our 40 hours and get paid less. I'm thinking of pretending my lunch hour is actually two.
That's the spirit!
"Ask not what you can do for your country, but what your country can do for you!"
FIFA is a corrupt organization and should be disbanded along with international football. full stop.
Against the wall when the revolution comes:
FIFA
Bankers (not all, just some, especially those with houses I like)
MPs (as above, but two houses)
The FA
Oh, and Miquita Oliver. I just don't like her. Even if she has a cool Mum.
Actually, no. Her Mum can come round and cook for me and I'll let her daughter off.
The Marquis de Sade got his hated parents-in-law saved from the guillotine.
I can also show mercy.
Well, not Sepp Blatter.
But he's not related to me.
And he never tried to get me out of prison, unlike La Présidente (de Sade's mother-in-law).
de sade's mother-in-law got you out of prison??!
Ok, levity over, time for seriousnessesses..
I've mentioned before that my best friend J is in a relationship with one of my other best mates, Jan. He's the same age as me, and she's 10 years older than us. They split up briefly last year, but then got back together, but this time aren't living together as they effectively were before. J's back living in his house and Jan has her house.
Seems to be working well, they've both seemed much happier the past few months, like it's all just starting to come together properly. Both have had minor triumphs in their work, and have been really getting on with having a lovely life. Jan's health problems which have been severe seemed to be at an end. She has a kidney problem, but it's being managed. She had to have an op last year to remove ovarian cysts or something, and that all went well. After two years of constant health scares and problems (themselves coming on the back of a cancer scare, where she thought the cancer that she survived ten years ago had returned) the time seemed have come for blue skies and a little fun.
The last few times I've seen Jan the difference has been profound. It's like my mate is back. The energetic, optimistic, creative and funny mate who'd just got so bogged down in a health nightmare. was only commenting to J a few days ago how much better and more like her old self she is.
Jan's been feeling weird for the last two days. Pains in her head and neck, strange sensations of pressure. Yesterday she went to her doctors, and they sent her to the hospital suspecting she may have had a minor stroke. Initial CT scans showed nothing on the brain, but the lumbar puncture they did last night showed blood in her spine, so apparently she has had a minor stroke.
They've moved her now to Leeds hospital where there is neurosurgery department. They don't know if she has a further bleed, but she had another funny turn today and they seem quite worried.
Obviously J is worried sick. He's on his way home now from Leeds and is going to call at mine en route. Gonna roll a few smokes and down a couple of beers. Get his mind of it.
I'm really worried about this. Obviously I'm worried for Jan. And i feel a profound sense of the unfairness of life that she is having to go through yet another nightmare of hospitals and tests, fear and uncertainty. But I'm also worried for J. Worried on so many levels. Worried about what he may have to cope with in the near future.
I hope every thing works out for yer friend dana
Considering the adages "We pretend to work and they pretend to pay us" and "We work just hard enough to keep from being fired and they pay us just enough to keep us from quitting"
How much less pretending does 3% come out to and how much easier will your day be?
Sorry to hear that. I don't think you could make 3% up in pens, pads, and paper clips.
This.
We count on a bit more money each year,in exchange for taking on more and more workload. Being denied a pittance isn't as bad as giving up some pittance.
yikes, Dana. I hope your pal gets some good news from the health front.
good vibes to you and her and J.
Thanks peeps. J's back over at the hospital with her now. They're meant to be doing some kind of scan or test this morning, so hoping for some news soon.
Her kids must be going through it right now. Youngest is 14 I think.
Dani that's awful.
My thoughts with you for her and for Judah.
I'm sorry your friends are going through this. If there is any way to reduce their stress levels it would help.
Just thought I'd let you lot know that Dazza's Mum died yesterday. Not really sure what else to write. The funeral will be on Friday.
Oh, so sorry to hear that Ali. My condolences to all of you, especially Dazza.
Quick update on Jan: she's back out of hospital, and no sign of a second bleed. She's on bedrest and destressing for a while.
so sorry Ali, give my condolences to Dazza and all the family.
Sorry to hear that Ali. Thoughts and prayers to all.
Ali - so sorry to read of your loss. Hugs to Dazza, you and your family.
Dana - good news re Jan.
Ali - my thoughts & sympathy with you and your family - especially Dazza.
Sorry to hear this Ali :(
So Sholder up date , the Last shot seems to have helped ALOT !!!
Sholder Still dont work right But Im learning to Work with in my limitations , the sholder will TELL me when i Mess up
Yesterday afternoon I had just finished loading up my truck from a Job , went to turn left to walk around and get in my truck , i heard POP !!!
hit the ground
and my Left Knee said " Oh I dont Think So DUDE !!! You AINT Useing me !!!
So here I sit Ice'n , Ace bandged , full of Ibuprofen's and Anti inflammatorys ,
Ortho Appt for Tuesday .
FUUUUUUUCCCCKKKK !! I sucks getten Old !!!
Ali, so sorry to hear about this. My thoughts are with you. Hugs to you all.
FUUUUUUUCCCCKKKK !! I sucks getten Old !!!
Getting old sucks for everyone. I hope your knee will be okay.
Sorry to hear this Ali :(
So Sholder up date , the Last shot seems to have helped ALOT !!!
Sholder Still dont work right But Im learning to Work with in my limitations , the sholder will TELL me when i Mess up
Yesterday afternoon I had just finished loading up my truck from a Job , went to turn left to walk around and get in my truck , i heard POP !!!
hit the ground
and my Left Knee said " Oh I dont Think So DUDE !!! You AINT Useing me !!!
So here I sit Ice'n , Ace bandged , full of Ibuprofen's and Anti inflammatorys ,
Ortho Appt for Tuesday .
FUUUUUUUCCCCKKKK !! I sucks getten Old !!!
Just fix it with duct tape, like everything else. sheesh!
Zippy, be glad it's just a case of the kneesles and not small cox.
Kneeseles ive Had ,
Now Small Cox , well You'll just have to tell me What thats Like
Kneeseles ive Had ,
Now Small Cox , well You'll just have to tell me What thats Like
haggis :D
Sorry for your family's loss, Ali. xxx
Kneeseles ive Had ,
Now Small Cox , well You'll just have to tell me What thats Like
touché
CWB had a pretty abrasive personality but a heart of gold. Probably 20 years ago while defending him in conversation I stated that he was an asshole, but he's our asshole. After all this time I still can't come up with a more appropriate description for his place in our crew.
Thinking about this, while reflecting on my own experience.
Yeah, the abrasive ones often make otherwise routine experiences more dynamic, and the memories more vivid. :yesnod:
She's doin' pretty well Casi, thanks for asking. She's taking it easy, mainly resting and watching tv shows on the laptop in bed. She's been up and about a little, done some baking (her main way of destressing) and the last results that came through showed no sign of any further bleed. Her blood pressure is still very high but not as scary high as it was a few days ago.
I think she's pretty much decided she doesn't want to return to her job managing the Trades Club. Way too high-stress. Even when she returned to work after her operation last time around and everyone had sworn blind they'd be more supportive and not dump it all on her, things quickly returned to the status quo. I think she gets paid something like 25 hours a week, but actually does more like 50, just plugging the gaps. And that's on top of a few hours of teaching each week, and attempting to start up an amazon/ebay book business.
All things considered though, she's doing well. *smiles*
I am posting a belated 'upset' from Tuesday.
I lost my iphone 4. I left it in the back of a taxi. Not a private hire vehicle, with a company I could call, but a hackney carriage cab from the ranks.
I was pretty sure it must have slipped from my bag onto the taxi seat as I was getting out. I knew I'd had it on that journey because I'd sent a text to somebody.
Wednesday, I did a little googling and found that the taxi drivers are suposed to hand any lost property into the licensing department in town, within 48 hours of finding it. So, I phoned the licensing dept. Nobody had handed anything in. They took my details, time, place and destination of the taxi journey, and said they'd look into it.
Meanwhile I phoned my provider and discovered that my insurance doesn;t cover loss. And I am locked into a two year contract. Sure, they can send me a sim, and my monthly charge still covers texts and phone calls, but that's all.
So, I went checking online and resolved that if my phone doesn't show up, I'll have to buy a second hand i-phone 3. A step down, but there's no way I can justify spending enough to replace it like for like.
So, then I got a phone call from the licensing dept. The guy told me he was going to go and talk to the drivers at the rank. And would let me know if anything came of it.
..... Now let's jump to the happy thread :)
I cannot express accurately the amount of hate I have for my job right now. I spent a good amount of time tryin not have a breakdown and biting my Han to try keep from screaming in the bathroom earlier. This fucking place gets worse by the day. 1) changed the website we place orders through to super shitty one that is so awful most of us just stopped using it and call to place the order. 2) our ticketing program freezes 5-6 times a shift. If it's not frozen then copy/paste function will absolutely stop working I
Until you close your 50app you need and sign off and all the way back in. 3) new apps we support are so poorly designed we spend hours a day jut trying to figure how how the user screwed up their procedures. 4) they now record both our audio an screen captures of our comp during a call. Can't joke with coworkers on IM or do anything personal related. I'm poetic at lunch from my phone. I'm a good employee but this job is boric as fuck, I need something to DO and relieve the stress of being so bored. Fuck this place! Fuck it all!
Recruiting!!
Its all I do. I recruit, I train...then start again.
I have a bunch of resumes to read and go through today.
Recruiting!!
Its all I do. I recruit, I train...then start again.
I have a bunch of resumes to read and go through today.
Recruit me! No need to read my resume, I'm pretty f*ing awesome.
Yes you are, mtp.
I'm a bit of a bitch to work for though, ask my whiney little sales boys!!
Four interviews lined up for Tuesday, then I have to staff our new satelite office an hour away.
Life...:rolleyes: A friend said to put walls up around me. Easier said than done.
Just read about your Mother in law, Ali. I am so sorry to hear that news.
My upsetting thing is I miss my husband. He's gone for a week to Kentucky. Just miss the hell out of him.
Is he hanging with Digr? If so, I'd be more worried than anything ;)
Bad management in filling in staff for missing employees on sick leave = exceptionally angry customers. And an inability to go to the bathroom when needed.
It's kind of like: eff 'em. IF they happen to lose all their marbles so what? There is an I in team.
It's so discouraging, the level of apathy that is cultivated here. I already have the extra long days due to this problem, that's fine...but I should be able to take normal breaks. :(
Pee in a cup and occasionally take your boss a complimntary beverage
You can solve any problem, monster. You seriously should charge for that.
I'd laugh but my laugh track is off because I'm being bombarded with yelling and crying.
7 more hours of that. I'll laugh tomorrow. :rolleyes:
I'd laugh but my laugh track is off because I'm being bombarded with yelling and crying.
7 more hours of that. I'll laugh tomorrow. :rolleyes:
Sounds like you have Wolf's old job :rolleyes:
new weed-whacker just gashed my leg.
new weed-whacker just gashed my leg.
Weed-whackers and folding chairs. They'll both bite you if they get the chance.
and dogs. and limbless knights.
Suicidal thoughts. I think my depression is breaking through now as everything feels like it's just turning to shit. I had a nice crying jag yesterday. Haven't done that in years.
I find sometimes that's the best thing for me. Just cry my damn head off...
Hang in there UT. You are loved, and for good reason.
I am sorry you are feeling so badly.I know that when people give advice, especially when feeling so blue, it seems insubstantial and pointless but I know, I really know that if you keep focused on the things you can do and see with your minds eye the goal you want, even when life seems to keep tripping you up, you will get there. There is always a way to to get what you need. That will eventually lead to the something bigger and brighter you are looking for, even when things seem a little dark.
When I feel pushed I break things down into the tiniest goal possible. I don't know what that is for you but for me it is keeping a roof over my head. I would take in renters if need be.
anyway,
I am sure you are seeing your doc, so you can get your rx upped as needed. I know you've said this is what you do and it has worked for you in the past, so I see no need to stop treatment now.
All of us here wish you the very best. You have a great mind with many wonderful things to share. You have many talents and those things will generate money if exploited to their fullest potential.
For example, I have a friend who busks and makes a goodly amount of change that way, even though he has a job some days he can put a huge chunk of change in his pocket. So 25 to 65 dollars doesn't save the day but it probably makes a person feel good to know that if you play on the street people will throw money at you ;)
I know this seems like unfocused pep talk but I mean every word.
take care, I mean it!
I'm sorry that you're going thru a down spell, UT. Depressions sucks big time. I deal with it all the time myself. And when I'm at my low point, it seems impossible that life will ever get better or that I will ever be able to do anything to pull myself up. Try to keep in mind that this too shall pass. And like Sky said, maybe you should see your doc about getting your anti-depressant(s) upped or changed.
Hope you feel better very soon - like yesterday!
I have two sick boys at home with me today. I'm waiting for the third one so I have the trifecta.
You're not alone, UT. Right now is a bad season for a lot of people I know, myself included. You can make it. One day at a time and fuck everything else, yeah?
UT, I'm there with you and here for you too. You know it's bad when you are nose deep in shit and you feel like you're doing better.
Do what you can and let yourself rest and do what you need to do.
I'm at 60mg of fluoxetine and it is barely making a dent. I can only say that I share the feelings.
We all care about you.
Shit UT, that sucks. Just keep in mind that this too will pass.
I've been struggling with depression for a few months now. Day after day goes by and I just cannot make myself do what needs to be done. It's bizarre. Like sitting down and actually engaging with the subject I am supposed to love is physically impossible. I end up sitting at the computer, bored, just bouncing between two or three sites for hours, and just can't make myself do anything else.
I find my thoughts are going down dark paths more than ever. LIke I am 'practising' for the deaths I'll have to deal with (Pilau, Mum, my brother, friends). There's this ever present shadow and I daren't let myself future pace antything because it all just starts to look impossible and bleak. Like the world has shrunk down.
This too will pass. It's all the comfort I can think of.
I have two sick boys at home with me today. I'm waiting for the third one so I have the trifecta.
Hope it's just something passing through, Ali.
Bet it's hellish while it does though.
Fingerers crossed for Max.
UT - yep, been where you are.
Doesn't help though.
Just best wishes. Came through it before, can handle it again. I promise.
Do threats of violence warrant a call to authorities? Why yes, yes they do.
Do threats of violence warrant a call to authorities? Why yes, yes they do.
Did you?
No, but I should.
Some people just don't get it. Rail against society while offering no solutions, contributing nothing but complaints, and making people feel worse than they do.
I've been threatened over situations I have no control over. I'm no automaton; I try to help as best I can, as much as the law allows. I've been afraid of walking to my car, not knowing what "i didn't get what I wanted" person might be lying in wait.
I don't find the comments so glib or innocent as we could pretend they are.
My hands are shaking so much I couldn't hit the numbers on the phone anyway.
I'm about done. If that's what passes for reasonable political opinion or 'discourse' in this place, if silence promotes more of the same, then what the fuck am I even doing here.
It's not worth my health, and I'll tell you my BP is through the roof right now.
All because of an ignorant elitist asshole. :(
Here's hoping the asshole puckered for a second when (IF) he realized just how far he'd taken it.
:headshake indeed.
Infikey, I would say, call security and/or cops whenever reasonably justified. Especially in the land of the free-to-bear-arms.
UT - you've written so many wise words here for others who were in the depths of depression. Please try to hold them in your own thoughts for yourself in your dark hours. As to suicide - please don't. You have no idea how you'd be missed by you family and friends. Please. Believe me on that one. Call a suicide line, or the Samaritans ....
No, but I should.
Yes, you should. There's no reason that you should allow yourself to be berated or threatened. You're nobody's whipping boy. Let professionals handle it.
Suicidal thoughts. I think my depression is breaking through now as everything feels like it's just turning to shit. I had a nice crying jag yesterday. Haven't done that in years.
See your professional. Change your meds. It may feel like it's turning to shit, but it may just be your brain chemicals talking. How many sites have you designed already?
when you consider suicide, you should always remember to consider killing what's causing you to feel that way. it aint you. take action against the smallest of your obstacles first. then the smallest one that's left after it's dead.
you are not the problem. you are just you. and i love you. and so do we all.
srsly.
Thanks man. I love you right back and all of you.
This one is going to turn out to be 80% meds, I know it now. The 20% of it that's real life suckage doesn't provoke this kind of response. Been better the last two days, as well.
Glad to hear it UT. And very well said, LJ.
Seconding the 'well said' and glad you're feeling better UT.
Glad you're on the way back up mate :)
Glad things are on the upswing, UT. Keep on keeping on.
I also appear to be on the way back up again, thankfully.
Still finding it almost impossible to get up in the mornings, but at least once I have persuaded myself out of bed I have been able to get a little work done. Yesterday i even washed my pots and hoovered! (vacuumed)
UT - you are a rock to me. Hang in there and know that this too shall pass.
I'm taking my kid to the doctor today for a checkup on his meds. His OCD is driving him crazy. If he doesn't do the rituals, he thinks he'll go to hell.
Infi - when someone is harshing you like that you look at them and say, "You are interfereing with my work," which is a work place no-no. NO ONE has the right to harass you at your place of work. Call security. Make a report. Report the asshole. That will give them pause for thought.
when you consider suicide, you should always remember to consider killing what's causing you to feel that way. it aint you. take action against the smallest of your obstacles first. then the smallest one that's left after it's dead.
you are not the problem. you are just you. and i love you. and so do we all.
srsly.
Jim, that is a tremendous insight. Thanks for that. You made my week. It makes Herculean tasks less intimidating.
wut jim sed.
Just keep on
truckin'
I'm crashing again. out of nowhere. I was upbeat earlier. Had a really good day, so why the fuck am i just crying uncontrolably? My throat is hurting with it.
Is it possible you're bi-polar?
I dunno. Maybe. I think if I am it's mild (relatively).
See, now I am ok. Had an hour or so of feeling utterly shit. Actually that's not true. Here's the weird thing, I seem to be both up and down at the same time.
I dunno. Sometimes it's like there's a scream lodged in my throat. Then *snaps finger* whoosh. Am fine again.
... Here's the weird thing, I seem to be both up and down at the same time.
I dunno. Sometimes it's like there's a scream lodged in my throat. Then *snaps finger* whoosh. Am fine again.
Even a caffeine overdose can do that. Over 400 mg (a couple cups of coffee) and caffeine becomes a mood enhancer that swings you back and forth as your thoughts change subject. Something so simple is probably not case with you though is it.
*thinks*
I suppose it could be. Truth be told I drink a hell of a lot of coffee :p And tea...
It's also possible that the hydroxizine is having an adverse effect.
I dunno. I've always been like this. From being about 8 or 9 years old, I'd go through phases of this. Then I'm fine again. *shrugs*
It doesn;t help that I am out of pot ;p Usually I am able to self-medicate my way out of it lol
when you consider suicide, you should always remember to consider killing what's causing you to feel that way. it aint you. take action against the smallest of your obstacles first. then the smallest one that's left after it's dead.
you are not the problem. you are just you. and i love you. and so do we all.
srsly.
pure gold jim.
thank you.*thinks*
I suppose it could be. Truth be told I drink a hell of a lot of coffee :p And tea...
It's also possible that the hydroxizine is having an adverse effect.
I dunno. I've always been like this. From being about 8 or 9 years old, I'd go through phases of this. Then I'm fine again. *shrugs*
It doesn;t help that I am out of pot ;p Usually I am able to self-medicate my way out of it lol
Maybe you're bipolar Dana. ;)
Seriously though, the feelings you describe sound very much like those my friend describes.
eta: oh I see someone's already suggested that. That's what I get for reading threads from the bottom up!
UT, I've been in this mindset myself for the last few weeks. I don't have any answers other than to just ride it out. Try and focus on the knowledge that these feelings don't last forever.
Eat more turkey! (high in serotonin)
chin up, dana! we loves us some dana too!
so, uh... tony... can i get some of that Bud Light?
Well... just got off the phone with my mother... seems my aunt was found bloodied and beaten to a %$^@#%$ pulp, and within an inch of her life (if we are lucky). There was dried blood on her face and hair, so she had been there alone for at least a few hours when her husband found her. She is in intensive care right now, with bleeding in her brain, swelling and god knows what else.
There was no evidence, and they think maybe one of her kids ( 27yrs old) might have done it... but they are not sure. Because my uncle was so calm on the phone ( he always is calm, its his nature) they took him into custody over night... they let him out this morning, because of the fact the dried blood says he could not have been in 2 places at once. If she wakes up, and is not a vegetable, she might be able to tell them.
SIGH This sucks. She does not know anyone right now... do I take the time off work, grab as much cash as I can... and go see her... or do I wait? She is my favorite aunt, but honestly have only talked to her a few times in the past few years. My mother is not even sure of what to do, and they are super close... they talk every day. We are afraid if she passes, we will need to go out for a funeral. Or if she does not come out of it, and never recognizes us again, is it worth the money right now? I doubt I will go out. I am not close enough to the family to go out in their time of stress... I do not even like my mother overly much... but this still sucks. My heart goes out to them, it really does.
Time for the wood chipper !!
So sorry to hear about your aunt, Jaydaan. :( I hope your aunt will get better. If she's in a coma, there's nothing you can do for her even if you're physically there. Is her husband by her side?
Time for the wood chipper !!
I just realized that Zippy is a man of few words. Well, I hope they catch the bastard.
Jaydaan, that's awful. I hope that she recovers. In these situations, I would always say that if you can, go and spend time with her, even if she is in a coma. Your presence may assist her even if she is not able to show recognition. My view is that if she does pass on, but you've spent time with her beforehand, then the funeral is not something that must be attended.
If I'm ever in a coma, I would not want distant relatives to go to any trouble to come visit me. I'd want my wife to visit, and if my kids are in town, that would be nice too. But I wouldn't want anyone going to any real trouble or financial burden.
Her husband is there... now... he was not at first, because they took him to jail! My aunt is very practical, I will not go myself, but have encouraged my mother to. The last thing her 6 kids, grandkids, 3 siblings and who knows who else needs is another person to worry about/feed/shelter etc.
Then I find out my great aunt passed away 2 weks ago, my daughter was to tell me, and didn't because " you were not online " I told my mother to contact me personally, and not expect my daughter to tell me anything important. This is also the same daughter that "forgot" to tell my my mother had a heart attack in Nov. SIGH
Then... my husbands dad calls. Hubby's uncle is in hospital with a 30% of surviving. I didn't get details.
What a day!
So sorry to hear all that. Some family is great to have with you at a time like this.
Too many is an added burden. YMMV
Sending warm thoughts your way Jay. How awful. :(
Jaydaan, that is too wretched for words. Is your Aunt in Canada?
Why do I read this thread? Terrible things happen here.
I'm so sorry Jaydaan.
I'm so sorry to hear everything's happening. Today is not a good day indeed. :(
sorry to hear all this jay
Goddammit. I'm sorry about everything, Jaydaan. I hope your aunt starts recovering soon.
Well... see what over reactions and presumptions do? SIGH
There was no beating. It seems my aunt is a horrible alcoholic and decided to detox. With no help, no dr support or anything, she had a MASSIVE seisure. Looks like she seized for quite a while... all the bleeding on the brain, swelling, blood etc was caused from constantly banging her head. She was alone.
She still has not come out of it yet, and when she did kind of wake up, she knew she was in the hospital, knew her name.... but had the wrong city, and gave the year of her birth instead of this year, when asked the date. They now have her on the detox drugs ( whatever that entails) and now we wait. It looks like the thing that caused her seisure might be responsible for saving her from *some* of the brain damage. Did you know that drinking overmuch for over 35 years causes your brain and surrounding cushioning to shrink? I didn't. Well it gave room for the swelling, without serious pressure... causing less damage somehow. This could be a good thing.
God, Jaydaan, what a shitter of a week you're having. Hope things settle down soon and that your loved ones are ok. Maybe this detox will be the thing that saves your aunt. At least it wasn't violence and family strife. Small comfort, but probably less distressing for the family than what it initially appeared to be.
*hug*
good god.
Sending good, healing vibes to her. I always relate to these kind of things...having detoxed myself (too many) times.
Good luck and godspeed.
and, Jaydaan, I don't know what your relationship to this aunt is like, maybe she's a completely awful person, etc. but she's going to need some good people around her for this. I'll bet she's hating herself right now.
Having sent numerous people to detox, I do know that stuff. And yes, the seizures can be really extreme, especially in heavy drinkers.
Jay, I hope things go as well as they can. Hopefully the memory stuff will clear somewhat (or may not be related to the seizures, since there are chemical/architectural changes in brain structure of severe alcoholics). Hopefully this will serve as a wake up call for her, and she'll keep the initiative that's been started by this terrible event.
Adding my shock and good wishes to you and your family Jay.
What all the postees above have said.
Thanks man. I love you right back and all of you.
This one is going to turn out to be 80% meds, I know it now. The 20% of it that's real life suckage doesn't provoke this kind of response. Been better the last two days, as well.
Sorry I missed this development. I hope you are well. I'm taking a breather as my continued emotional response to a certain poster's ongoing battle with reality is completely disproportionate. Be well brother, I'll poke my head back in after washing my machine.
chin up, dana! we loves us some dana too!
so, uh... tony... can i get some of that Bud Light?
Just saw this:p
Thanks sweetie:)
Well yesterday we had a NASTY Thunderstorm pass thru ,
it dumped about 4-5 inches of rain in a Verry short period of time ,
Fucken rain washed out part of the Pool pad we had Made ,
So this Holiday weekend insteed of Floating in the pool Chillaxen and the such we get to drain the Pool , Fix the fucken Sand that washed out and refill the pool !!!
the side dropped 5-6 inches
DSCF7351 by
zippyt, on Flickr
DSCF7352 by
zippyt, on Flickr
I dont know if you can see , but the Whole Pool has settled and slanted about 4-6 inches
Dscf7353 by
zippyt, on Flickr
Oh Well , such is Life
It's better that way. You can practice swimming up hill.
Borrow a fire truck and wash out the other side.;)
I've been very lightheated for about 2 hours now. I ate an apple with peanut butter in case it was from low blood sugar, even though I knew it wasn't. So now I'm nauseous and lightheaded. At this rate I don't know if I'll be able to drive to pick up the kids from preschool, dammit.
I hope you are feeling better, Clod. Did you figure out what was wrong?
Not specifically. My mom eventually drove me to the after-hours clinic, but the guy just gave me a generic "labyrinthitis" diagnosis (i.e., inner ear infection, but he said probably caused by a virus, not bacteria) and some anti-vertigo pills. The pharmacy wanted me to wait 45 minutes for them, so I just went home and went to bed, and by morning it was pretty much gone.
Avk. Glad you're feeling better Clod. Hope thats done with.
I'm upset, annoyed, irritated...I don't know. I got my credit report by signing up with one of those privacy assist thingy. Looked over it today. It listed infos from Equifax, Experian, and TransUnion. So, my social is correct, but there are two different (wrong) birthdates, two different (wrong) employers, and 4 wrong addresses. There were mortage and auto loans that I never took out. There is department store card with a balance that I don't carry. There is a card with past due balance which I'm sure is not mine because I pay everything on time. There are several credit cards of the same bank, each with balances, and I only carry one card! Grrrrrrrr! There are more but I'm too lazy to open the report to see what else is there. The thing is I've got one excellent and two good scores. :rolleyes:
heading to illinois tomorrow. Happy because I'll get to see my closest friends but gutwrenching because it is our final farewell/wake for the mighty CWB. reality has set in.
Lola - I went through something similar. GET THAT FIXED ASAP!
Its not as much of a hassle as you'd think. Call them & explain the situation.
They'll give you step by step instructions on how to correct it all.
You gotta stay on top of it though. Check it every 3-6 months to make sure none of it comes back.
Sorry L123. Focus on the good times.
I've lost a night out in Cardiff.
My bro won it, but because it had to be taken by the end of August and they both work full-time (and she works some weekends) there was no way they could manage it.
So he offered it to me. Well, to the family, but I was the only one here to accept it and Mum suggested it should be us rather than her & Dad. She even said she'd pay for an extra night for the two of us.
And what did this stupid f**king waste of space do?
I can't find the f**king prize slip. He only gave it to me this afternoon!
I did not take it out of the house. It has to be here somewhere. But I have NO IDEA where I left it. And now that Mum knows about it I am too terrified to admit I've lost it because by her opinion my room is already a bomb-site and a pig-sty and I am already following my Dad by having Alzheimers.
Shit.
Poor old Stevo was doing something nice and I have turned it into a disaster.
A friend told me this weekend that she has breast cancer. Not diagnosed, she hasn't been to a doctor in a very long time. Prior to this, the only people who knew were her and her husband. She hasn't told her 30-something kids, who adore her. She says she doesn't want to seek treatment: she's watched a couple people go through it and be sick all the time and die anyway, she says. I don't know if she's scared, or if no treatment is just how she feels about it.
But she showed me why she thinks she has it. Her nipple is inverted and her breast looks all twisty and she has a huge lump. She says "it's too late" but I don't know that's true. Once those signs are there, visible, frightening...has it progressed far at that point?
I don't know what to do. Keep bugging her to at least find out...if she then chooses no treatment it will be a choice not made out of fear. Should I tell her daughter (who is studying nursing) who I know would drag her to a doctor (this really isn't my place, I know.) I feel helpless that I can do anything to help her. I will be here for her no matter what she decides, but I want her to decide to fight.
She's a good person, good kids, loving family...she loves her dogs and her grandchildren. She's mid 50s. Too soon to leave us.
Thanks for the ears. I don't know if any advice exists, but if any comes to mind, I'm listening.
Can you talk to her more, anonymous, and try to persuade her? Seeing a doctor does not mean that she has to undergo treatment, after all, she can still choose not to. Are there any examples of people that you both know who have successfully undergone treatment, to offset the sad storiesw she is referring to? Can you enlist the help of her husband in persuading her? How does he feel about this?
Hugs to you in a very difficult situation.
Generally speaking (correct me if I am wrong) it isn't so much the size and spread of the cancer in the breast but whether or not is has spread to other parts of the body that is important. It doesn't always follow that an advanced cancer in the breast is inoperable, but if it's spread to the lymph nodes and bones for instance, then there a real chance it's too late.
I had two aunts die of breast cancer. One of them had her cancer diagnosed too late after it had already spread. There was little they could do for her. My other aunt's cancer was discovered at a stage where it most likely could have been cured with surgery and chemo. Aunt2 refused to get medical help. She told the family that God would cure her. I'm sure God would have given it His best shot if she would have let him. God had sent experienced physcians and the latest discoveries in treatment of cancer. My aunt turned her back on them and died. It makes me sad to this day.
Anon, as others have mentioned, going to a doctor for a diagnosis doesn't mean your friend has to undergo treatment. In your place, I would strongly encourage your friend to go in and see what's going on. It may not be as bad as she thinks. It might be treatable. She might have many years ahead of her. I would definitely enlist the daughter's help, as well. If it were a matter of MY mother's life or death, I'd certainly want to know.
Best of luck to you and your friend. Cancer sucks. :(
Hard though it is, I think you need to respect her wishes and just be there for her. It may be that she is slowly changing her mind about seeing a doctor/telling people, and the first step is telling you. Be gentle and patient and be there. The treatments for breast cancer are horrible -mastectomy, chemotherapy, radiation, ongoing infusions and there are still a huge number of women who die anyway. And watching that is painful and heartbreaking. Your friend is not in denial, she's just choosing a different path. I think she has a right to her privacy, even if it's something her kids would want to know.
All your responses have been immensely helpful. I am leaning towards what monster thinks: I have to respect her wishes, let her choose her path, which is what I told her yesterday. But I would be remiss if I didn't urge her one more time to at least see a doctor.
Maybe this was a next step in confronting it, and she can now tell more people, it being more "real" but I will also urge her to talk to her kids.
Another friend has some stuff going on RFN, but the reality is he brought the drama on himself, and I can't put aside what I am feeling for K, who didn't ask for any of it. Yet my heart is being pulled in all kinds of directions today. :(
Thanks again, everyone.
A friend told me this weekend that she has breast cancer.
Fuck Cancer.
If your friend is in the Philadelphia area, PM me. I have a friend who is a breast cancer surgeon and does a lot of work with extremely advanced cancers.
Anon what an awful burden to bear.
For both of you.
Dying from cancer is hardly taking the easy road, so if she is speaking from a position of knowledge then all power to her.
But by not getting a diagnosis she really isn't helping herself or her family.
She will need some kind of medical assistance at some point.
If she chooses not to have teatment, all well and good. But she should at least find out what the options are.
How would her family feel if she finally went to the Doctors to have them say, "Six months ago we would have given you a good chance.... but now...."
You can only support her.
Tell her about Bri, and my Mum, and MTP and Tennant's Mum and all the rest.
She needs love. But also information.
And my very best wishes to you and her.
I have a really bad dose of tonsilitis which is compromising my whole immune system.
I have good drugs now. I should feel better soon.
Students came in to tell us another student who was waiting was blowing her mouth and smacking her kid around. She said she could go get (let's say Buford) and HE would take care of us because he's a might powerful guy.
Then in speaking to the cow orker right next to me she mumbled that she would kill him.
Of course, the copperoonis are on it and FSM bless them for their presence.
Some people are too nutty to go out of their homes.
Some people should be confined to their homes in solitary. Slapping her kid around? Buford and his evil twin should come slap HER around. Let her see how it feels. :mad:
She was obviously batshit crazy.
These are the kind of people who don't have social skills developed well enough to know that you don't threaten people's lives.
The cops were with her for quite a while. Don't know what might transpire when she tells Buford about the indignities she faced.
Just another in a long line of chances for some crazed hilljack to kill people because the world didn't give them their ignorant desires.
:headshake
When one of my friends first moved up here she had a conversation with a local sheriff about life up here. She wrongly assumed that he wasn't busy most of the time. He told her he spent a lot of time dealing with people who'd had "stupid attacks"
She asked what a stupid attack was and he said, "Oh, you know; someone gets drunk and calls up his neighbor and leaves a message on the answering machine threatening to kill him and then leaves his name and number at the end of the message..."
When one of my friends first moved up here she had a conversation with a local sheriff about life up here. She wrongly assumed that he wasn't busy most of the time. He told her he spent a lot of time dealing with people who'd had "stupid attacks"
A friend of mine who is a detective in one of the smaller, more rural areas of our county told me recently that when he was working patrol he got many calls from parents who couldn't get their child to go to school. So the parent would call 911. Patrol would go out, tell the kid they had to go to school and that was that. Crazy eh?
I came up $43 short at the end of my night shift at the Bates Motel. I counted the money 3x, added up the ledger 3x, and I still couldn't get the books to balance. I went back and looked at the guest list and only two people paid cash for a single room - $43.00.
I think I know what happened. Four groups of guests decided to come in and clog our small lobby at the same time. One group were Italians who couldn't speak English, but were very voluable in Italian. I think between all the Italian going on, and trying to sign in everyone else, one man just didn't pay for his room and I didn't catch that in all the commotion.
This is the first time in the 9 months that have I worked here that something like this has happened. I was scared the manager would take the $43 bucks out of my pay, but she let it go - this time.
Some people are like predators, just waiting for the chance to score. If I had to rip someone off, I'd go for a mega outfit like Walmart. But even there, a real human cashier is going to have to bite the bullet when her cash drawer comes up short.
And to all you lurkers out there (because I know actual Cellar members wouldn't do this): People, guess what? When you get too much change and keep it or sneak by without paying for something, you are robbing the clerk standing in front of you who makes minimum wage - you are NOT ripping off "the company" or "big business" or whatever. The company maintains its profits in part, because their employees have to cover any shortages that occur on their shift. :mad:
This time, I didn't have to and, hopefully there will be no second time.
their employees have to cover any shortages that occur on their shift.
Glad things worked out for you, but that is not always the case.
Still, the morally correct thing to do is correct the error.
Still, the morally correct thing to do is correct the error.
Who? Me or the thief? I was prepared to have that $43 deducted from my infitessimal pay check, but when the manager said to let it go, I let it go - with deep gratitude.
The other thing that pisses me off is that the thief wasn't say a poor Navajo who had got a ride into town and ended up stranded (we see a lot of folks in that sort of situation). The thief obviously had money - he was dressed well and had a late model car with vanity plates. He just got himself a free room because he could. By time I had discovered the error and figured out who it was, he had revved up his engine and hit the road. I hope he overheats on Red Mountain pass and no one will stop to help him. Let him sleep up there at 10,000 feet in his little sports car for free.
OK, I've ranted enough about this. The sun will come up in the morning. :cool:
No not you, the hypothetical person in your post.
My cousin actually posted on Facebook when he got a bunch of lobsters for like a quarter of their actual price because a clerk made a mistake ringing it up. He was gloating about it. What a dick.
Bro-in-law put their dog, Lexie, down today. She was about 8. They adopted her last year from a humane society and found out about a month later she had an enlarged heart and congenital heart failure (the humane society knew but did not tell them). Anyway, she's been goin downhill pretty fast for a couple of weeks and he finally agreed it was time. It was a sad morning, and a sad homecoming. I'm leaving Della at my parent's this weekend because I have to work and I don't want him to be reminded by her what he's lost. I think it would just be insensitive to have her around right now. He is, understandably, very upset. My sis is less so, when they found out the dog was sick, her coping mechanism was to not get attached, and she's the type of person who can be kinda cold like that. I can't blame her though, it is hard to get attached to a dog that's not very affectionate (this one wasn't) and has health issues that you know are just gonna cause you pain when it dies.
My sis says they will never get another dog, or pet, but my bro-in-law is a pet person and they can't have kids, so I think eventually she'll give in. I just hope they get something younger and are more careful about who they adopt from.
It still really pisses me off that that particular humane society assured them that they'd had it all checked out that it was no longer having a heart problem when it obviously was.
Sorry about their dog MTP but shelters want their dogs adopted. There are good and bad shelters. There are good and bad breeders. JMO a good breeder is a better choice than any shelter. I just got an email from a lady telling me her sweet lil boy she got from me passed on , he was 17 years old. She wants another companion and she knows that I am one she trusts.
That is completely disrespectful and since you feel like its OK to kick a person when they're down, I don't think I need to react with kindness, especially not now. I don't have a single issue with rescuing dogs, in fact, I think it is the RIGHT thing to do. It is moral. I think breeding dogs and selling them (even if don't end up with a profit) is immoral. I don't give a fuck about how long one of your dogs lived and happy one of your dumbass customers was. My family has always "rescued" or adopted pets from all walks of life.
Tasha: large dog, part shepherd, found but don't know where I was too little, died around 15, heart-worms
Pooch: large dog (indeterminate breed), found at the flea market, died around 15, euthanasia
Bitsy: small dog, chihuahua/rat-terrier, "accident" litter from neighbor, 13, died from stroke
Buddy: black lab, abandoned by pseudo family member, 13 and acts like a puppy
Della: bichon frise, rescue from shelter, 3years and super healthy
Lexie was an extremely special case. I don't think my sis and BIL made a wrong choice when deciding to rescue, they just got duped by an asshole "humane" society. Its not OK to lie, whether you're a breeder or a humane society. Just like they had no way to know that the humane society was not being honest and could not be trusted, they could have the same damn problem with a "good breeder."
To top it off, they wanted a slightly older dog, not a fucking puppy. Not everyone wants to deal with a puppy. So yes, there are risks, just like there are when you go to a "good breeder." My whole issue with this is that the people they adopted from out-right LIED they weren't just ignorant of the condition, a breeder could do the same fucking thing.
Take your opinion and shove it. Self righteous bitch.
Dogs die no matter where they come from and no one can know when or how for sure. Deal with reality.
I don't have any idea where you get I am self righteous. I think you are in need of serious medication and some social skills.
That was WAAAAY the Hell out of line MTP !!!
Don't tell me what I'm in "need" of until you get some fucking manners.
Its not out of line for her to tell me that dogs from a breeder are better than from a shelter when I just expressed that my BIL had to put his dog down and that right now my family is hurting for him? Bullshit.
MTP I think you were absent the day they passed out manners. Self righteous are those that think they are "rescuing" a dog and then they are pissed off because it, like every other living being dies.
In case you misunderstood or if anyone else would like clarification, the lady that had the 17 yr old dog she got from me, got him when he was 7 years old after I paid to have him neutered. She did not pay for him and she did not bitch about it when he died.
If I was playing hooky that day, you played hooky the whole damn week.
I'm not bitching about Lexie dieing, I'm bitching about the lying. Its not that hard to understand when I capitalized the word in my previous post.
Breeders, as a norm, are selling puppies, so there was no precedent for me to believe the dog was not a puppy. You said specifically, that it is better to get a dog from a breeder than a rescue organization. There is no reason for me to think you mean any different than the normal way a person gets a dog from a breeder. To top it off, its insensitive as all fuck out to tell someone that they made the wrong choice to rescue their dog that just had to be put to sleep. Self righteous are those that think they should tell others that they should have got their dog from a "good" breeder because it would have lived longer, and they made the wrong choice by not doing so.
You obviously have no idea how people can acquire dogs from breeders. Breeders know more about the dogs they are placing then a shelter will know about the dogs they are placing. Its not self righteous to try and educate the ignorant. Probably wasn't the best time and probably no time would be best for you since you already have your ill perceived prejudices.
Holy helll, mort. I think the point nirvana was making was a salient one. Shelters are manned by largely untrained amateurs and volunteers whose main objective is to place volumes of unwanted pets. Detecting an enlarged heart in an 8 year old dog is undoubtedly well outside of the scope of normal shelter operations. Calling her self righteous is over the line. Calling her a bitch is down right cunty. Get a grip. Youre making an ass of yourself.
Sorry Moar, I'm with Jim here. That was totally OTT.
I will repeat myself. I'm not mad about the rescue organization not knowing. I'm mad that they DID know. And told my bil and did that it was fine and the dog no longer had the heart condition. She was from a foster home and was getting regular vet visits. I think it's over the line and cunty to tell a person they're stupid for rescuing a dog from a shelter when breeders apparently adopt out dogs on a regular basis and because they are a breeder they are clearly the smarter choice. That's bullshit, there is no reason to trust an individual over a rescue organization.
I don't recall anybody saying that a person is 'stupid' for going for a rescue dog.
I'm really sorry about your Bro's dog though. And yes, the shelter should have told him the truth about the dog's heart problem.
That said: I find my hackles slightly raised by your assertion that people who breed dogs and sell the pups are immoral. If you genuinely believe that then you shouldn't own a dog. There would be very few dog breeders in the world if people like you and I didn't want to be dog owners. Most of the dogs in the shelters originate from dog breeders, good or bad.
I've had good and bad experiences of shelters and of breeders. My own preference is to buy from a reputable breeder. Why? Because I want my dog from early puppyhood and I also want to know exactly what that dog will turn into, in terms of size, fur type, exercise needs and likely temperament. I got Pilau from a breeder, and I did a hell of a lot of research first, both into breeds and into breeders.
I seem to remember StaceyV leaving here because of an issue with a dog Nirv sold her.
Just saying.
*waves at Sundae*
HI SUNDAE!
To have a sundae on a saturday is special, indeed.
glad you're back!
What's Upsetting Me Today
This July has been the suck.
Worst July Ever. And I hate July. Suspicious of it.
I seem to remember StaceyV leaving here because of an issue with a dog Nirv sold her.
Just saying.
I don't know nuffink 'bout that. But we (the family) have been stung before with breeders. There are some nasty tricks employed by the less reputable ones. Such as over feeding the pups with high protein to encourage fast growth, so that they look like proper nice chunky pups. Tends to lead to serious joint problems from an early age.
One of the worst problems though, actually, with breeders, is that they tend to be breeding pedigree dogs and many breeds have serious health issues. With the best will in the world, some breeds are more problematic than others. Non-pedigree dogs are often a lot healthier.
Just to correct you Sundae, Stacey V was not here actively posting when I arrived, had not been for a couple of years. I came here to read posts I googled about her treatment of her poor puppy she called the "little Pisser"'when I arrived. Had I read her philosophy about how she treats animals prior to her getting one from me we would not be having this posting. Some people should not have animals.
Stacey's problem with a dog from me stemmed from her and young people like her expecting perfection in a live being. She gave her an unnecessary surgery to remove her front dew claws twice because the dog was so distressed by having it's "thumbs" removed at 6 months it ripped out the stitches. The hair never grew back on her front legs. Stacey had the opportunity to return the dog for a full refund and decided to keep her and bitch about it. If someone will not return the dog there is nothing to be done about it. Stacey was a know it all and probably still is.
Stacey was a mistake in my screening process. I don't believe she cares about her dogs only what she thinks they can do for her.
She has since posted on a public reproduction list that instead of taking a bitch to vet for a c section she tried to save money?? and use forceps to remove puppies which are not used on small dogs and ended up pulling off parts of the dogs foot/leg. Yes what a lovely home she was.
Had I seen MTP's post about her sister and I did not know them, I would not send a dog to them because their coping method is to not love a dog that is ill.
Shelter dogs can be fine pets, it is the expectation of perfect because one has paid I have a problem with. Heart disease in a dog can spring up quickly when valves wear out. Shelters cannot possibly screen clandestinely bred dogs for genetic defects.
Non-pedigree dogs are often a lot healthier.
When you combine the problems and genetic defects of several breeds this is basically untrue and has seemed to play out in the case of the dog MTP's family adopted.
staceyv was insane from the git-go.
When you combine the problems and genetic defects of several breeds this is basically untrue and has seemed to play out in the case of the dog MTP's family adopted.
That's why I said 'often' rather than 'usually'. It all depends on the mix. There are some breeds of dog I just would not keep, even though I like them. Because I know that their breed is peculiarly prone to distressing genetic conditions. Much of it is because of the extreme breed standards imposed on these breeds in show circles. A situation that is thankfully changing, but which has left a legacy of problems.
staceyv was insane from the git-go.
Oh You SPIT on her SOUL !!!
staceyv was insane from the git-go.
She was.
But that was part of her charm.
having said that, she was a bit weird about her dogs. I never understood what she wanted from them.
Why the fuck did she have the dog's dew claws removed?
Much of it is because of the extreme breed standards imposed on these breeds in show circles.
Breed standards can only be interpreted by the person that is reading them. They are not imposed by show dog breeders. It is the individual that can take a standard and use it to breed the extremes of a breed and certainly in the case of my breed Chihuahuas, I and most show breeders would rather die than breed teacups, blues, merles and over done heads, but they are the bread and butter of the back yard breeder.
Painting all with the same brush is never a good idea ;)
Why the fuck did she have the dog's dew claws removed?
Because someone told her that the dog could not win in the show ring without having its front dew claws removed. Never mind that I and my mentor who has bred over 300 champions and several Best In Shows between us have never removed the front dew claws on any of our dogs. :rolleyes:
ƒucking ants. ƒast, crazy little ƒuckers.
I want hit them all in their tiny little head with a tiny little ƒucking metal bar.:mad:
I seem to remember StaceyV leaving here because of an issue with a dog Nirv sold her.
Just saying.
StacyV left because the dog Nirvana sold her shit on her carpet's soul. Everyone knows that. Try to keep up with the rest of the hikers.
Stacey V was the last show newbie I placed a dog with. New people want perfect and they don't seem to want to listen to the advice of those that have experience. Animal sciences was my major. Animal husbandry is my vocation. That does not mean that I am rolling in cash because I occasionally breed animals. I am lucky I get to do what I enjoy and make others happy in that process.
Do these people look happy? They should be, their kid is well adjusted not on drugs and she is working on projects that build her character. This is why I breed animals.
I don't know nuffink 'bout that. But we (the family) have been stung before with breeders. There are some nasty tricks employed by the less reputable ones. Such as over feeding the pups with high protein to encourage fast growth, so that they look like proper nice chunky pups. Tends to lead to serious joint problems from an early age.
One of the worst problems though, actually, with breeders, is that they tend to be breeding pedigree dogs and many breeds have serious health issues. With the best will in the world, some breeds are more problematic than others. Non-pedigree dogs are often a lot healthier.
I knew a breeder who would add very fine sawdust to the oil and it would quiet the sound of tapping valves for a few hundred miles then you realized you were in need of an engine rebuild. Caveat Emptor.
I've never had a positive view of show dogs, since Pete's step-dad used to show the very hideous diseased looking rumey-eyed Cavalier King Charles Spaniels. I'll take my big old farm bred Aussie product of reliable working dogs over the fluffy show version. I do support girls showing cows though.
Breed standards can only be interpreted by the person that is reading them. They are not imposed by show dog breeders. It is the individual that can take a standard and use it to breed the extremes of a breed and certainly in the case of my breed Chihuahuas, I and most show breeders would rather die than breed teacups, blues, merles and over done heads, but they are the bread and butter of the back yard breeder.
Painting all with the same brush is never a good idea ;)
Oh I don't paint all with the same brush at all. And it may be that this is more of a UK problem than US. 'Crufts' used to show on the BBC every year, couple of years ago the BBC pulled out, and so have some of the main sponsors, because of the way breed standard expectations were impacting on canine health within competitive show circles.
Now you're right that much of it is about interpretation of breed standards, but it's also the case that a lot of breed standards have had to alter in recent years, most particularly with regards things like tail docking, but also to try and ameliorate some of the extremes in certain breeds.
I'll take my big old farm bred Aussie product of reliable working dogs over the fluffy show version.
A well raised dog is a treasure whether its a purebred or a mutt :)
Word up. :) Breeds do give you an idea what to expect so you can anticipate a need to chase sheep, foxes, or frisbees.
...or to be a couch potato and get enough exercise in the yard chasing a ball, for those of us who are too lazy to properly walk a dog.
I did say "I seem to remember".
I never saw the dog and have no other information.
I was actually anti-breed until I got my two Singapuras. And that only happened because my nearest shelters would not condone a cat being kept indoors (this has completely changed - some cats need rehoming that have never been outside and will only go to homes where this is understood and accepted) so I had to consider a breeder.
I'd still be wary of buying a breed with known health conditions when so many non-breeds need homing. But given that some cat breeds have real personality traits, I understand it. I've tried to get two people wanting cats to adopt older Singas rather than getting kittens. Didn't work, but I think I made a good enough case to make them think.
Cheers Bri.
Wave back x
...or to be a couch potato and get enough exercise in the yard chasing a ball, for those of us who are too lazy to properly walk a dog.
There is a dog for every purpose from fucking cancer to chillin on the sofa.
I did say "I seem to remember".
I never saw the dog and have no other information.
It was a jest, a merry jape.
1) Nirv doesn't even know what type of dog it was or the root of its health issues.
2) Yes, I overreacted a bit, but I don't feel any need to apologize. Her response was rude and was just a stab to make someone feel worse about a bad situation.
3) Breeders are not rescues. They don't regularly rescue dogs from bad situations and try to give them better homes as a regular job.
4) @Dana, saying shelters exist because people want to be dog owners is like saying orphanages exist because people want to be parents. No, the shelters exist because there are BAD pet owners and breeders. People like me want to rescue dogs, not JUST be a dog owner. An integral part of my owning a dog is knowing that if I had not, it would not be living in such a happy home. This is not the same as just wanting to be a dog owner for the sake of being a dog owner.
5) If Nirv gets to express her opinion that breeders = better than rescue, then I am perfectly within my right to say I believe that breeding is immoral. We have 100s of thousands of animals that are put down or are in shelters every year, and yet breeders, no matter how "good" they are, continue to add to that population simply by adding pets. We need to take care of the domestic animals that don't have good care before we add to the population. I feel its immoral to ignore the pets we have in shelters/rescue organizations in favor of getting an animal from a breeder just because we don't think those in the shelter will not be perfect enough for us.
5) My BIL should have been more cautious about rescuing the dog that he did. All the warning signs were there when he adopted, but I do feel like the rescue lied to him and assured him that those warning signs did not mean what he thought they did. He did make a mistake, but telling someone that in their time of grief does not help, it only twists the knife. That is why Nirvana pissed me off. What she said was simply insensitive to the situation.
we'll give you another week to grieve
Just to correct a misconception. There are very few purebred dogs in animal shelters. Shelter dogs are not the fault of pedigreed dog breeders. They are the result of irresponsible dog owners. Some shelters import dogs from out of the country to meet the consumer demand in their area. Some shelters in New York import from Russia, some Texas shelters import dogs from Mexico. I know where every dog I ever bred is/was and many breeders have the same ethics.
Ignorance is not always bliss.
The truth is in the middle of some of these articles I realize hyperbole does exist but there is legislation pending to prevent the importation of large quantities of dogs that would be for sale at animal shelters.
http://doglawsatlarge.blogspot.com/2007/12/dog-shelters-import-from-around-world.html
http://www.naiaonline.org/Library/understanding_animals/global_stray_dog_population_crisis.html
Bringing the Problem Home
Starting with many of the same eradication measures currently being employed in third world countries, it took the US nearly a century and a half to get its surplus dog problem under control; indeed, it has only been during the last 10 years that the demand for dogs has become equal to or greater than the supply in many parts of the country. In fact, what the US has today is a dog distribution problem, not a dog overpopulation problem -- a situation that has led to a practice labeled humane relocation.17
In some parts of the USA today, demand for dogs so far outstrips supply that the public -- bolstered by state-of-the-art advertising campaigns for rescued dogs -- are willing, even anxious, to adopt dogs with severe behavioral and medical problems. Where healthy, well-tempered, adoptable dogs were once euthanized by the millions for lack of shelter space, Americans today are lining up to pay large sums of money to adopt problem dogs; ones that are blind, deaf, missing limbs or suffer from serious behavioral issues or chronic diseases. Organizations that began their work when there was still a serious surplus dog problem in the US are now bringing in dogs from any place they can find them and asking their kind-hearted donors to fund costly surgeries to correct heart defects and other problems so that the dogs they’ve rescued can be saved.18
Other groups import maimed dogs for adoption into the US from great distances, even foreign countries where street dogs are plentiful.19
I don't care where you get your dog, as long as it is well cared for. (which is a matter of opinion btw... keep reading this long post to see my explaination) Pretty much every shelter will lie to get the dogs placed, and that is why many dogs have been shelter dogs more than once... it can get overwhelming to some families. We have known puppies that were returned to the breeders because "they no longer matched the couch" or because "they had a child, or have to move". These same excuses are why dogs are in shelters too. Every new dog owner should have to go through school. If you are not consistant with training and care, the dog will act out. The reason there are soo many shelter dogs (and cats) is because its so expensive to get an animal fixed. Once the cute factor is gone, many inexperianced owners dont bother getting them fixed. All of a sudden they have a litter, and now everyone goes to the shelter, they could not look after one, and now they have 7! Shelters charge to surrender your animals in Canada, so there is another reason why idiots just let the animals go, or drop them off in the country somewhere. these dogs are lucky to get taken to a shelter, many get hit by cars and eaten by wild animals or simply starve. All responsible breeders I know, take thier dogs back with no questions asked. It could be a 3 month old, or 13 yr old. That is one reason you may not see purebreads in a shelter that often.
That being said I got my first boxer, Freya from a large breeding kennel and training facility. It was run by a woman who had been showing and breeding dogs for over 30 years. It was a very clean, almost sterile environment. Freya was healthy, cared for, had her own kennel at night. She was walked daily and when that was not possible she was put on a tread mill. She knew how to walk on a leash, knew sit and lay down. That was it. She was shy with people and had few social skills with other dogs but play as a boxer does (which scares many dogs, and most humans at first) Freya had never been in a car, in town or around many people. She had never been inside a house for that matter. She was 11 months old when we got her. The breeder knew more about her 2 breeds of dogs then anyone else I have ever met. They were dogs, not furry human replacements in the family. They worked, either as gaurd dogs, companions, show dogs, etc...
Now, to me... this was not quite right. I was concerned about the lack of love and bonding. To some, you would consider the breeder to be callous and mean, when in reality she was practical. The dogs, once sold got the love and caring I feel they all need.
I got my boxer pup Loki from a backyard breeder in town just this week. Loki was 14 weeks old and too skinny for his age (runt) While his parents were bred at a house, I soon found he was kept mostly outside, and only came in at night. His nails were cut too short and all of his claws are now bruised because of it. It will grow out, nothing about his care was a permanent issue...
While I was picking him out, and paying for him, a few things sent warning bells off in my head. Nothing bad enough to call the SPCA, but things that were just not right with me (again that quailty of care opinion thing) 2 of the puppies in his litter died at 2 weeks old "because they got cold" These pups were born in April... not too cold out by then, and why were they not inside? The woman also bred siamese cats, and had two litters in 15 weeks by the same parents. Really? give your cat a break lady...now did they cat get out one day and get caught? did she deliberately breed the second time? I do not know, I did not ask.
Now my 2 dogs are house pets, completely spoiled. They are allowed on the couch, they have food, water, toys and walks. They have 2 parents who love them more than 2 adults should I am sure. They also have a teenage "boy" to look after. They have a large yard to play in, and if we ever move, we move into a place that takes my entire family, and that includes my 2 fur babies. Oh and both my babies have health issues. Freya has a heart murmur, she developed at about a year and a half old. We could have taken her back... but really she is ours, and I would not even think about it! Loki has distichiasis ( eyelashes growing inside his eye, that may or may not require surgery to fix later) I was told about that AFTER I paid for him.... did that stop me from taking him home? no, just means I might not get to go on a date night one night, or something. So that he can have his surgery. Hopefully I can get it done at the same time he is neutered and it will not cost much, considering he is already under.
Maybe seeing another side of things might show you, that in my opinion Nirvana was not trying to piss you off. The internet is a great place to get misunderstandings, as there is no emotion in words on a screen. Maybe in your sensitive state you took things to heart more than they were meant to? Either way, I am sorry for your family's loss, and sorry your family member's way of coping upset you. Give your |Della a hug, and hopefully tomorrow will be a better day for you.
Probably a bad time to say, I would like a retired grey hound, not for any noble reason...tho..
*my mind keeps spinning the grey hound thing* * They are many kinds of grey hounds* * old men* * buses* *racing dogs* It's a toss up between 1 and 3.
Dogs certainly control their humans ;)
The Power of the Dog
There is sorrow enough in the natural way
From men and women to fill our day;
And when we are certain of sorrow in store,
Why do we always arrange for more?
Brothers and sisters, I bid you beware
Of giving your heart to a dog to tear.
Buy a pup and your money will buy
Love unflinching that cannot lie--
Perfect passion and worship fed
By a kick in the ribs or a pat on the head.
Nevertheless it is hardly fair
To risk your heart to a dog to tear.
When the fourteen years which Nature permits
Are closing in asthma, or tumour, or fits,
And the vet's unspoken prescription runs
To lethal chambers or loaded guns,
Then you will find--it's your own affair--
But ... you've given your heart to a dog to tear.
When the body that lived at your single will,
With its whimper of welcome, is stilled (how still!)
When the spirit that answered your every mood
Is gone--wherever it goes--for good,
You will discover how much you care,
And will give your heart to a dog to tear.
We've sorrow enough in the natural way,
When it comes to burying Christian clay.
Our loves are not given, but only lent,
At compound interest of cent per cent.
Though it is not always the case, I believe,
That the longer we've kept 'em, the more do we grieve:
For, when debts are payable, right or wrong,
A short-term loan is as bad as a long--
So why in--Heaven (before we are there)
Should we give our hearts to a dog to tear?
Rudyard Kipling
you guys don't know me... I'm a newbie to these parts but...
mrs. G and I have lived in a tiny little house... part of an old farm complex for 11 years this month
our landlord lives at the bottom of the courtyard
his parents live across the courtyard from us and while we have never called them this to their faces to us they have been "granma and granpa"
granma passed away yesterday and granpa came over to our house 7:00am this morning to let us know.
no, they are not family but we have always felt close to them
R.I.P Mme Baudin
Grych I'm so sorry to hear that.
Mme Baudin is in my thoughts now.
You do NOT need to have a blood connection with someone to be close to them and grief is grief.
Nirv, sorry to be a moaner again, but Kipling did write some doggerel (pun intended).
I'm not a dog fan, and I think pretty much everyone knows that, but I can and have loved individual dogs. In fact I got a magazine from The Dog's Trust this morning - they never put a dog down except for health reasons. I donate to them because John Barrrowman is one of their sposors and sometimes has a competition where you have to donate to be elegible for a JB prize. Probably shocking to dog lovers, but it works.
Staffordshire Bull Terriers/ crosses now make up 43% of Battersea Dogs' Home intake (it's the most famous Dog & Cats' Home in England). That is irresponsible breeding and ownership.
Research by the Kennel Club showed that the Staffordshire bull terrier has ousted the labrador as the capital's most popular dog. Almost three times as many Londoners buy the breed than anywhere else in Britain.
About 13 per cent of all dog owners in London own a Staffordshire bull terrier. The breed is not among the four dog breeds that are banned under the Dangerous Dogs Act 1991, but they can be trained as “weapon dogs” and have been responsible for a number of attacks on people in the capital.
How sickening.
Now my own upset.
Sweet shining hell, it's 30 degrees here! (82)
I cannot move without sweating.
The fans are woefully useless.
It's not even bloody sunny (although if it was I wouldn't dare sexpose myself to it - mis-spelling intentional)
Crikey me, it's hot.
step one..
Asda and buy a bag of ice
step two
while at Asda buy a bottle of tonic
step three
hey you're there already... pickup a bottle of gin ( I can recommend Hendricks )
combine ingredients, consume,
repeat as needed.
Oh dear. 82 sounds like winter to me, right now.
SICK of HEAT!
Oh dear. 82 sounds like winter to me, right now.
SICK of HEAT!
wow... really hot there in the east Pacific eh?
Yeah, I live in Bali Hai'o.
(I slay me)
grynch probably doesn't know...I live in Ohio. I'm sorry. It's not my fault. :(
Now I must go wash that man right outta my hair.
Yeah, I live in Bali Hai'o.
(I slay me)
grynch probably doesn't know...I live in Ohio. I'm sorry. It's not my fault. :(
Now I must go wash that man right outta my hair.
monkey... no I didn't know that... and please let me express my condolences.
Thanks. I also accept cash.
I should have my boobs hanging out and a really short skirt on, and be really ditzy.
Thanks. I also accept cash.
only if you're dressed as above... :p:
Gin makes me gag.
As does heat.
Thank FSM I'm not working until Sept.
(Soz to all who are, with a sneaky added snicker).
Probably a bad time to say, I would like a retired grey hound, not for any noble reason...tho..
Sky, you aren't going to make a penny on a retired grey hound. The reason they retire them is that they just don't win races. You really want to get a new, fresh one. Look for reputable breeders but expect to pay some coin.
Good luck!
Found out today our new neighbour (new as in less than 5 years) has 3 Italian Greyhounds.
They are very quiet, as in I rarely hear them barking.
Saw two of them today and they are GORGEOUS!
(picture is not them, but they are very similar)
But really lovely.
This should be in the Happy Thread I guess!
They look a bit like meerkats up close.
And are a bit nervy and licky.
And sculpted-looking, if that makes sense.
If I didn't have Diz (and I do, and I love him completely) I might be tempted to steal one. Only not really, as I'd be found out pretty soon and prosecuted, given they are neighbours.
£600 average apparently.
I didn't like them that much....
Ooooo! Santa's Little Helpers!
cuuuuuuute!
neighbors of one of my brothers run a greyhound rescue site ... retired racers and such... and while cute the dogs I've seen have almost all been very timid and very skittish
I never felt "drawn" to any of them ( and consider myself a dog person ) and when they were let off of a lead ....................they just flew... old instincts I suppose.
They're sight hounds, like Irish Wolfhounds. Unlike smell hounds like a bloodhound, they'll chase whatever they see.
I want an Irish Wolfhound. That's my dream dog. I also want a pet cow. A horse or two. No monkeys, though.
There's a guy near me with an Italian Greyhound. Right bonny thing it is too. Incredibly precise movements.
£600 ain't such a big tag for a pedigree. Bearded Collie pups sell for anywhere betwen £200 and £800 depending on lineage.
£600 is 'spensive to me!
Diz was only £150!
Yes, that's also out of my price range now, but when I think about what I got for it, I am so grateful. And that's the draw I guess.
Although both my boys were neutered, whereas her girls are entire. The main reason I saw them today was that they are being segregated from the boy because they are on heat.
I'm quite stern about these things. If you pay £600 for an animal you can afford to get it fixed. I'll listen to anyone who disagrees, but personally I am all about pets being fixed. It's NOT natural. It DOES hurt. But it is kind in the long run. IMHO.
We didn't get our dog fixed. Money. And it was a kick in the cunt every time she was in season. Mum & Dad chose to go on holiday instead.
They fixed all our cats though.
Cheaper, maybe.
I've always had boy cats - chance not judgement - and I had two operated on, and two came to me already done. It felt right.
They're sight hounds, like Irish Wolfhounds. Unlike smell hounds like a bloodhound, they'll chase whatever they see.
I want an Irish Wolfhound. That's my dream dog. I also want a pet cow. A horse or two. No monkeys, though.
Irish Wolfhounds only live to be 7-8 they break your heart they are the sweetest dear creatures.
Pet cows I got em :) I had an Italian Greyhound once his name was Cyclone :)[/superficial posting]
I know that about the Irish. My ex and I went to an IW show in Lexington...over 400 of them in the show, many staying at the same hotel. I learned about their short life-span. But OMG they're so gentle and cute and HUGE. It makes me almost cry thinking about losing one so relatively young. I fell in love with them the first year I saw the Westminster Dog Show (I'd stayed home from work...YEARS ago, and caught it...for a few years after that I'd plan days off to watch it. Before interwebz, of course.)
I'll probably never be in the right situation for dog-owning anyway.
I'll probably never be in the right situation for dog-owning anyway.
Of course you will and you will post photos here of Ian or Colin or whatever his name will be :)
I never know my pets' name until I see them. Then the perfect name just comes to me.
Like Toonces Riley (I thought he could drive a car)
Gainesboro Thomas (He's part Russian Blue)
Madison Toto (He followed me home and needed medicine)
Taj Ma Hall (she was calico-y and had an orange dot on her forehead)
I inherited the names of my last two boys.
Dylan was a name I'd have been tempted to give anyway, but it was one the breeder suggested I might want to change. He was under a year old and she usually called him Twinkle.
Diz was Dizney.
Oh no, no, no.
Diz he became. Diz he remains.
I will elongate his name to The Diz-cat and far more silly ones I won't admit to. And my nephew calls him Dizzy. But that's as far as it goes.
Like me talking to Gaines: hey gainesy wainesy kee kat boy. gainesy wainesy bugsy wugsy is a kee kat boy, a kee kat boy...
Pilau ended up with his name because when we went to see him the first time, the breeder told us he was a tricolour bearded collie, which are apparently quite desirable amongst the show set. And he was three very distinct colours: a deep chocolate brown, with white collie flash round his collar and the back of his neck, and some white on his legs and belly. He also had little flashes of bright ginger on the backs of his legs and a few other places including the sides of his eyes.
So...celebration pilau rice usually comes in three colours *smiles*
Like me talking to Gaines: hey gainesy wainesy kee kat boy. gainesy wainesy bugsy wugsy is a kee kat boy, a kee kat boy...
Oh dear.
Same here I'm afriad.
Diz is Babba-lou (because I can rhyme it with What's up with you, Babba-lou?)
Babba-boy (no excuse for that one)
Troublicious
Boychick
Monkey-trousers (esp when flaunting his bum)
Monstarry
Angel-Pie and from that just Pie or Piya
So...celebration pilau rice usually comes in three colours *smiles*
I knew the story but it's still a cool name.
Now tell us the embarrassing names you call him.
Infi and I have already confessed.
Oh gosh...so many...
Pilster, Mr P., Pilau Poppet, Pilau Brown Bread, Muffin, muppet, Baby boy, sweetie pie, beastie bum, The pudster, Pud, pudding, Pilau pudding. My very own brahn baby (fast show ;p). And sometimes I tell him he's my beautiful beardie with long brown hair (which is a bastardisation of a Smack the Pony sketch). Oh yeah, and sometimes I call him Poor Pilau of the Poorly Paw.
I use show quotes a lot with him. Like sometimes I'l tell him: I am your mummy. I will always be your mummy (from DoctorWho, The Empty Child).
I talk to him a lot. I tell him he's my little wolf. My little wolf in lamb's clothing. I tell him that it's not right when people say he' a bad dog...they don't understand. It's not easy being Brown. And it's so unfair when peoplecast aspersions because, at the end of the day, he's just doin' his doggy best, as he understands it, with his doggy brain, and nobody, nobody could ask any more o fhim than that.
This is the sort of shit I am saying to him whilst stroking him :p
Oh yeah, and I tell him he's a good dog. A clever dog, and so polite. Never raises his voice, never shouts. He's just really, really good, and really really quiet. And that's why everybody loves Pilau. They all love Pilau, 'cause he's so good.
I have more, I can confess.
Mebbe we need a new thread.
Single Women Who Talk to Their Pets But Will Smack You in the Chops if You Suggest Said Pets Are Child Substitutes.
If Diz was a child he'd have been taken into care by now, the things I sometimes say to him.
Oh and on account of him being dyslexlical.
Pilau would by now have progressed from a young offenders institute to proper prison.
Autumn Nicole - My JRT doggie. Her nickname is Tummy (AuTUM - get it?)
Spiderman - a very tomboyish girl kitty who is black.
Zoey (the new momma!) - a long haired black kitty with the attitude of a dumb blonde.
Carly - a calico who is as sweet as candy. Nickname Carlita-Pumpkin Pita.
Stella - a tabby who is really a boy but we thought was a girl for a loooong time. Poor thing.
and Harry. RIP Harry. He died two New Year Days ago. We called him Hare the Bear.
Beau, my first very own totally unshared cat, was almost always just Bo Bo.
Turbo is the 'little one' most times. And that just comes from when he was a little kitty and I would put him on the bed and whisper to him to go to sleep. Which he usually did. Now when I whisper to him, he will still blink his eyes like he is getting sleepy. My sweet little one.
We call our dog Cleo Ki-ki mostly because Max still only pronounces her name Kee-o. I call my cat Shadow, shaddy baddy because he is a bad kitty sometimes. We have a cat called Skinny who gets Skinny Mini a lot because she really is a little cat. Gizmo gets Gizzy a lot and Dolly gets Dolly Wolly. At other times they are all referred to in profane language.
My blue Australian cattle dog will actually come to "shut yer piehole" Cattle dogs have a keening kind of shriek. The phrase is warranted!!
Sky, you aren't going to make a penny on a retired grey hound. The reason they retire them is that they just don't win races. You really want to get a new, fresh one. Look for reputable breeders but expect to pay some coin.
Good luck!
Do you
really think I want a
retired grey hound so I can make money and win races? :cool:
Big Sarge.
I am worried and too far away to help.
We only have an internet relationship but I know he's one of the good guys, he's so thoughtful, loves his family, has served his country and now feels abandoned in the hell of ill health.
And I can't do anything except try to think of kind words.
Sometimes that's all we can do. Your caring thoughts mean so much to him, I'm sure. Knowing people care is sometimes all we need to keep putting one foot in front of the other.
Get well soon, Sarge. If you do I'll mail Sundae to you, after I win the lottery. ;)
I was thinking saran wrap. ;)
Do you really think I want a retired grey hound so I can make money and win races? :cool:
No, but I did think you had a sense of humor.:cool:
Riots in Tottenham (North London).
It's a volatile area, but seeing London on fire just makes me feel ill.
It started as a peaceful protest outside the police station on Tottenham High Road, but quickly turned to violence and mob rule. It was ostensibly about the shooting of a man on Thursday - police said he fired on an officer and was shot and killed.
It ended with burning buildings, one police van, two police cars, looting, destruction of property and people leaving their homes with nothing on their backs only to return in the morning to burnt out shells. People's livelihoods effectively destroyed.
Animals are smart enough not to shit where they eat; what is with these people?!
Although it is suspected that many who turned up from midnight onwards were organised theives, who attacked a retail park half a mile from the centre of the action, in order to specifically rob a sports clothing store and an electrical store.
Let's hope todays two big football matches (in different parts of London) and the Hackney Carnival aren't touched by any of the same madness.
I know, I felt my stomach sink slightly as I was watching the news. Felt like watching the Brixton riots way back when Ghost Town was a hit.
Animals are smart enough not to shit where they eat, and so are humans, but crowds aren't just collections of individuals. The way a crowd responds is different to the way any of the individuals making it up respond.
There's clearly a lot of ill-feeling around this. Friends, family and neighbours are adamant that the man who was shot and kiled was not armed, and would not have shot at anybody. Yes he was a bit of a rogue, but not a violent man, according to those who knew him. They are angry at how the police have responded, and let's face it, wuold you really trust the police to review such a shooting fairly? I mean, ffs look at the Menenez shooting.
Horrible to see though. And really horrible to see the ones who just went on a mad looting and destruction spree.
I am always slightly dubious when I hear about an initially peaceful demonstration turning ugly. How many times have we been told that all was well until the black flag waving anarchists kicked off, only to find out later, that what started the violence was police kettling tactics?
I have been present at two major London protest marches in my life, and on both occasions they turned into a riot. On both occasions it was the bloody police who started it. On both occasions it was reported as trhe protestors turning ugly, and in each case it was later determined that the police had acted with calculated and needless aggression (in the Poll tax demo going so far as to remove their numbers from their epaulettes) and in doing so turned a peaceful crowd into a riotous mob.
Not saying this happened in Tottenham. But am definately dubious about what sparked this. I've seen first hand how the bastards use those dogs, horses and riot police when faced with protestors.
For me it's just the weather.
Eye witnesses are complaining that the Police stood back and did nothing.
That they were scared and ran away.
They can't win, really.
And who goes mob-handed and shouts in front of a police station expecting answers?
A vigil, a petition, some sort of campaign. Yes.
Standing in the street and demanding answers? Yeah, way to go in a volatile area.
Meh - you know I'm more right wing than you anyway...
It just always sickens me to see people caught up in events beyond their control. And burning homes and stealing cars and wrecking shops which people are trying to work in... I dunno. I don't think I'll ever see a cause "valid" enough.
I get what you're saying about mob mentality though.
As it was, so it shall be :(
That kind of destruction is no answer to grievances. What it is though is an expression of anger and frustration (usually) and when that happens in the context of a crowd, it can mushroom fast.
I'm probably the last person you'd expect to be violent. But I was just as eagerly throwing pieces of broken concrete at the riot police as anybody else at the Poll Tax demo. And I remember, very clearly, at one point, the part of the march I was with spilled into a side street where a police van was coming in our direction, moving slowly because of the people. For some reason, the mesh shield was raised, and his windshield was unprotected. We swarmed that van. There were people on top of it stamping, we were throwing things at the window, a couple of people were trying to stave the windshield in with wooden sticks that had once been attached to protest signs.
The police van backed out of the side street.
Now. I know that the man in that van was just an ordinary guy doing his job. Possibly with a wife and child at home, probably scared. But at that moment he was just the enemy. Because an hour earlier, I'd just seen one of my friends knocked unconscious by a police man when the crowd was still just shouting slogans. It was that event that kicked off the violence at that part of the demo (opposite the entrance to Downing Street). A big burly cop leaning over the barrier and punching a 17 year old girl to the ground.
A little later, as J and i were running down another street, there were a group looting an off-licence. We joined in.
It's hard to explain what the atmosphere of a riot is. It is a very peculiar feeling, when a demonstration turns into a riot. It's not like anything else I have ever experienced. Being part of a crowd action is weird, it changes the rules, it changes you.
I would imagine being part of something like that might even feel...cathartic? I'd like to punch some random dude from Wall Street just to make myself feel better.
I admit, if I was caught on the street and there was looting of an off-licence, I would be tempted to join in. On the understanding that "It can't hurt any more now."
I can't say I'd feel the same about JD Sports.
Very much so Bri. Very much so.
@ Sundae: yeah....I'm not sure I'd be over eager to loot a healthfood store...Thornton's on the other hand...
Just to be clear, I'm not saying the police started this. It could well be that this is an instance of a small group of protestors holding a vigil being disrupted by others looking for trouble. Just that I have learned over the years to view with great suspicion the initial reports of such events.
You've made me smile at least. The idea of you, bandana-faced, running off with armfuls of mung beans and tofu.
I bet people automatically assume you're a veggie too...
It's amazing how often they do.
And the times I've arrived at group meetings with a McD's coffee and someone's said: I wouldn't have thought you'd go in McDonalds...
I used to understand why people thought I was a veggie.
Left wing, small and skinny, outspoken.
But now I am more self-effacing and as previously mentioned I look like a farmer's wife.
But in the staffroom people still point me to the vegetarian food, or offer to check packets for me before I eat.
Perhaps it's the hair (the hair proves it).
You've made me smile at least. The idea of you, bandana-faced, running off with armfuls of mung beans and tofu.
And
that made me smile. :)
[YOUTUBE]yzPbNvIzMf0[/YOUTUBE]
But now I am more self-effacing and as previously mentioned I look like a farmer's wife.
So we must be twins :p:
[COLOR="Silver"][I am a farmer's wife][/COLOR]
A cow orker with a tendency to say completely inappropriate things. I can hang with the big dogs, but when this person starts also snapping at me and others, and actually whispers to the higher-ups that some of us are not pulling our weight when everyone knows the opposite is the case...I wonder if it's time to file a report. I would not be the first or last to do so in this case. There is too much back-stabbing going on, and I feel a need to CMA.
Sad it should come to that, but what would you think about racial comments (it works both ways) and sexist comments? I can play the game too, but when this person THEN goes running around badmouthing others with his own unwarranted and made-up allegations (again, not just me, I've heard about these things since I've been here but never made it my business until it became my business) why shouldn't I make a report? Document, document, document.
This job is stressful enough with the understaffing. Certainly stressful enough without people saying mean things and then shooting arrows at your back. I guess I need to grow a spine and report it.
Report it.
If you don't report it, it didn't happen.
Thirded
I am really irritated to the point of rage today. As some of you may recall, I'm trying to get off disability. Well, first the lady from voc-rehab told me that due to budget cuts, I have been put on a waiting list, and she has no idea when my name will come up, if ever. So, then I noticed an announcement for a job assistance program for the 55+ crowd, and I called them. Due to budget cuts, they will put me on a waiting list, and they have no idea when my name will come up - if ever.
Is there an echo in here?
So here we are with the economy straining at the leash to jump into another major recession and all state and federal job assistance programs have been cut, and stuff like food stamps and housing are next up on the block. Thank you ever so much Tea Bag assholes! :mad:
@Anon: You could put strychnine in the guacamole...
I finally go to the dentist tomorrow to have at least one tooth pulled. My teeth are in terrible shape because I couldn't afford to go the dentist. Now I have discovered a low income dental clinic which is good, but I think every tooth in the left side of my mouth is probably a goner. I wonder how many they can pull at one time. :thepain:
I second that. Teeth. What a pain in the mouth! :(
I am sorry, Sam! I have the same problem. Left side a disaster with one or two teeth that probably need yanked out. I hope you are able to salvage your teeth and that it isn't too painful for you.
Thanks, everyone! I have a question about this entire procedure, but I don't think it belongs here - maybe Health?
My audio card completely bit the dust this afternoon. I have a script coming tomorrow. Fuckity fuck.
Do you have, like, an old Fostex 4-track casette recorder in the back of your closet?
I have a G3 Mac from 1998. Which is most likely what I'll be using until I get my laptop fixed.
Sam, I'll be praying for you. The whole situation sucks. If it gets too bad, you can come live at the old sewage lagoon with me.
Now here's my crap for the day. We had a tough court (heavy docket). A man scheduled for trial on public drunkeness came to court intoxicated. Really you say? Well that was the small part. What capped it off the drunk SOB came over to me and started rubbing my belly. In what little bit of that pickled would he ever think it is ok to come to court drunk and rub on the police chief's belly.
Yes there was one hell of a fight! Turns out the bastard had 3 knives on him. Yes he is still alive. He'll make an appearance before the judge on Monday
Are you okay, Sarge? You weren't cut, were you? Btw, I hope you have some sense of humor at the moment, but I got a hilarious image while reading your post. Imagine a drunkard walking over to rub your tummy! :lol: :lol:
He'll make an appearance before the judge on Monday
after he gets out of the Hospital ??
Are you okay, Sarge? You weren't cut, were you? Btw, I ihope you have some sense of humor at the moment, but I got a hilarious image while reading your post. Imagine a drunkard walking over to rub your tummy! :lol: :lol:
I guess he thought I was a panda too. LOL. Lordy, the story has spread all over the county. Geez. Why do I get all the nuts? Anyway, I didn't get hurt. The knives were in his pockets and he never pulled them out. The guy's street name is "Bull" and before alcoholism took its toll, he was quite stout. Remember, I'm a good size ole boy, hence the name Big Sarge. He came up on the short end of the stick. I guess I kind of "squished him".
No, no, "used reasonable force to control the situation. Your honour."
I presume the guy is a wayyy gone alcoholic, can't help himself. He doesn't sound mean, just really messed up.
never a good idea to show up to court drunk.
glad you're ok sarge. It could've gone either way.
With the benefit of hindsight it IS a funny story. I LOL'd.
The reality was probably way different.
Glad you're safe.
Sam, I'll be praying for you. The whole situation sucks. If it gets too bad, you can come live at the old sewage lagoon with me.
Now here's my crap for the day. We had a tough court (heavy docket). A man scheduled for trial on public drunkeness came to court intoxicated. Really you say? Well that was the small part. What capped it off the drunk SOB came over to me and started rubbing my belly. In what little bit of that pickled would he ever think it is ok to come to court drunk and rub on the police chief's belly.
Yes there was one hell of a fight! Turns out the bastard had 3 knives on him. Yes he is still alive. He'll make an appearance before the judge on Monday
What's the charge for this one? Pandaring? :lol:
I slay me.
It is a funny story!
I have been trying to figure out a way to charge him witha sex crime. I can imagine the headlines, "Man Convicted of Fondling Police Chief in Courtroom".
So true IM. Everybody thinks I'm a big lovable panda.You can rub my belly anytime!
Hey! Keep that belly for overseas females only!
Grandad's nurse is very worried about him.
She worked with Mum years back, when she was a student and Mum was picking up extra money as a cleaner.
From what she's said, Mum doesn't think Grandad will get through his current illness.
I have more faith in his stregnth, but then I haven't seen him for a week or so.
I'm going tomorrow with my bro.
Mum's going tonight after Mass.
She must honestly believe it's bad, because she was there for over an hour this morning, and she doesn't usually visit twice a day.
AND she called my bro and sister AND her brother in Australia.
Seems more serious than the other times she's predicted his death.
But because of all the other times I still can't find it in me to be too worried.
Will let you know.
Oh, your poor Mum, she must be so worried. Thinking good thoughts for youse all.
@ Sarge: maybe he thought it'd give him good luck?
Visiting for a Halloween Party, my neighbor walked into my FiL's house and started rubbing his Buddha statue's belly... It as a weird moment.
Somethng well-intentioned that ended up being a paving stone for satan :(
Grandad's still alive.
I'm happy about it.
I'm just a little weary about my mother's death-watch scares.
She'll be right one day and I'll feel awful.
But there've been approx six that I can remember now (pre-hospital, hospital and care-home) and although I do love him, I don't worry as much now. And when I say death-watch, I mean checking we all have clean funeral clothes, lists of people to contact and the name of the funeral parlour and Chapel of Rest he is registered at, and recommended florist in case she is out of the house.
Even Dad had his doubts. His main worry was that Mum would cancel their weekend away in Peterborough. He's not a heartless man - Grandad has been part of his life for nearly as long as his own Dad by now (partly because thanks to WWII he didn't meet his Dad until he was five). But he has learned that rumours of Grandad's death may have been exaggerated.
Yes, it is really upsetting Mum.
And of course I am being sympathetic.
But I honestly believe this well pass. And he won't. This time.
At least she's sad, not furious, as she is when things simply go wrong.
No screaming, swearing or threats of violence.
Thank goodness.
I'm upset to find good news cluttering up this upset thread. I think. Maybe it makes me happy? Fuck. Where is the I'm confused thread?
Sundae, I'm very glad your Granddad is ok, and that's true for *all* threads.
My budget request just got slammed. No new vehicle & no pay raises, plus have to cut my budget request by almost $100,000. I understand we don't have the money but you can't get blood from a turnip. Damn. I am so, so fucked
Yes police. It means no new vehicles or equipment. Plus, I have to lay off an officer. The economy is taking a toll on a lot of small towns
maybe you can steal some? 1 -- fewer cops means lower likelihood of getting caught. 2 -- you get money. 3 -- increased crime can motivate your budget hawks to grant you more money.
win-win-win.
But BS , I thought you LIKED yer Cruser Hoopty !!!
Hell its Prolly Pretty good Geto Camo By now ;)
Yes police. It means no new vehicles or equipment. Plus, I have to lay off an officer. The economy is taking a toll on a lot of small towns
Tea Party municipality, eh? Too bad you don't work for those generous-with-everybody-else's-money Democrats. ;)
Some shit heels vandalized our Rod and Gun club. The spray painted some letters on the shooting shack and the main sign. Some initials.
Asswipes. I think we should put up a trail cam, but I doubt they'll be back. Prolly some local knuckle heads drunk for the first time and feeling their oats.
fuck them.
I eradicate any of that tagging I find (in my local area, in a couple houses radius of my house that is, I don't cruise the city with cleaning/sandblasting/overpainting supplies, but that would be a satisfying job, pissing on top of "their markings". fuckers) immediately.
Teahadist municipality, eh? Too bad you don't work for those generous-with-everybody-else's-money Democrats. ;)
Thats better.
The manager of the Bates Motel - Carmen - just called with the news that her grand daughter has died - at the ripe old age of seventeen. So Carmen needs to leave ASAP to be with her son back East somewhere and attend the funeral.
She asked me to fill in for her at the Bates and of course I said yes. Which means I will be putting in 14 hours a day over the busy labor day weekend starting tomorrow. :greenface
The plus is that I will make some badly needed extra money. But I wish it wouldn't have been at the cost of such tragedy for Carmen. :(
oh ouch, I'm sorry. But at least you'll get some cash in your pocket for more adventurin'
Went to see Grandad on Saturday as Mum was away.
He thought I was Mum.
I mean many people say we look alike, but I did introduce myself clearly. And Mum does not have pink hair.
He is rarely completely in reality now. He listens and responds logically, but not about real events.
He was talking to Mum the other day about the people who came to see him from New Zealand, and how good of them it was to come all that way. He also asks her quite often where she is living now, and how she will be getting home. Mum's lived in this house for 39 years.
He is happy though. When I was there I got him a cup of tea - which he drank half of (in a beaker, through a straw of course) and put a couple of bits of Milky Way on his tongue. He thoroughly enjoyed it. I then massaged his feet, and again he was relaxed and smiling.
So although I doubt he'll go with the drama of previous scares, I think he is slowly slipping away. I know some people can last years without traces of their previous personality, but he is terribly thin, prone to infection and overall quite frail. I can't help thinking that without the desire to hold on, he might well be ready to leave us.
It's not upsetting me as such, just a reality check.
Stay Strong and Smile for him Kiddo ,
think of the good times
I'm sorry Sundae. :(
My thoughts are with you.
I don't know if it's the day, or my mood, or just burn-out from all the craziness of the past month and a half. But I hate my job. I'm not allowed to say that because I'm lucky to have a job. And I should be forging ahead and trying to get promoted or I'm worthless.
But some days I hate it. To the point where all I want to do is cry. But, that can't happen either.
minkey.... of course you're allowed to say that. denying it is unrealistic, if not an outright lie at times. you show (from what little I can see here) proper judgment about where and to whom you say it... go ahead. I'm jealous, yeah, from a cash flow perspective, but I've filled out my share of FAFSAs. NO. THANKS. I'm glad you have your job, and not me. *shivers*
As for forging ahead, blah blah blah... life work balance. Your life, your balance, and the bird to those who judge you, yourself excluded. Though I doubt (and hope you don't) judge yourself worthless. I don't.
Cry? Why the hell not? Well, you probably have your reasons. Cryin's ok though.
Thanks V, that was very kind.
You are not alone, i.m. I loathe my job, too. I hate the long hours when I do work and the long intervals in between when they have no work for me. I hate getting only minimum wage and never ever overtime, no matter what. I can work a 54 hour week; I can work Christmas day - it doesn't matter. The cheapskate owner pays minimum wage all the same. And when he's not off on some junket, he comes in and micro-manages to the point where I want to hit him with something.
But I'm lucky to have any work at all, given the unemployment around here, and my age and situation. I take out my frustrations by giving people the lowest rates I can. No one EVER pays the standard price when I'm at the desk. Take THAT, Mr. Skinflint Boss! :mad:
Oh, and get this. I will not be receiving a check tomorrow for the full 54 hours I worked. The owner doesn't pay for more than 40 hours a week. So I have to wait until the next check to be paid for my remaining 14 hours. GRRRRRR! Is that even legal?
No it isn't. I'm 99% sure you are due 14 hours overtime (paid at 1 & 1/2x your normal rate) which would really come out to 21 hours at your regular rate.
There are federal laws about this and many states also have laws, some pretty recent. Contact someone in your state to find out more.
I googled "When do employers have to pay overtime?" and got plenty of good hits.
Trouble is that if I rock the boat, they'll find some excuse to let me go, and then I'll be making $0.00/hr. And we're all in the same boat. The other desk clerk was convinced that there's a law no one could get a raise for two years! I told her no, it was just the owner being an ass. The manager, Carmen, gets a pitiful compensation for all she does - which is considerable. There would be no Bates Motel without her. Carmen stays because she's 63 and afraid she couldn't find other work in the current economic climate. What use are labor laws when workers are afraid to ask that they be enforced?
Yeah, society as envisioned by Merc. :eek:
Call your local Gov't regulator. If not, then why have them.
Just an update on the Grandad situation.
Mum went to see him twice yesterday, she thinks these are his final days.
Both times he was curled up in a fetal position, not talking any sense (again, he thought Mum was Nan) and wouldn't accept anything other than a couple of sips of sweet tea.
But then we have been here before. And Mum does tend to assume any time his condition worsens he is about to die. And he has often rallied round.
I know she wants him to die and feels horribly guilty about it. She wants him to die as a mercy of course, not because it will be easier for her. Once he dies she is head of her branch of the family and will feel very lonely.
She's already started drafting letters to the family - she was going through old photos and there is a pile of envelopes addressed right next to me, on the printer.
She's asking my advice about where it is best to hold the service, and worrying that with the new order of service in the Catholic church she will looks like someone who has never been to a Catholic funeral before, and will look like an idiot.
She's also being a right mardy bitch, snapping at Dad and at me and being generally unpleasant. I take a deep breath and remember she thinks she is about to lose her father. And given the state of his decline, she already has of course. This is not about me.
I'll step up to the mark like I did at Nanny's funeral. I think that impressed Mum more than anything I have ever done. With all of my other failings and disappointments, she knows at least she can rely on me to perform as a dutiful daughter. I will display the stiff upper lip that she deems proper, and make funeral sandwiches and circulate with drinks and shake people's hands to thank them for coming and listen with interest to tales from long ago and do a reading in a mellifluous voice.
Sometimes, being disassociated is deemed a more proper response.
Hang in there honey. You're doing her proud.
What Dana said, SG. And yes, you're right, "Sometimes, being disassociated is deemed a more proper response" but do allow yourself to grieve, too. Hugs to you and your mum (even if she doesn't want it!!).
I'm sorry Sundae. You can handle this but, I'll repeat limey, you still need to grieve.
Went to see him with her today.
She was right, he didn't know me.
I know he hears Mum, because she talks to him for 30 minutes non-stop and she can still get him to try and sip a drink. But he might just think she is a nurse with a familiar voice.
He stays curled up now, and his face is so sunken. His mouth was open today, his tongue lolling out. There is no longer enough of him present to close it.
He is officially on Pathway Care.
And the path doesn't exactly end at Chair Aerobics.
He'll get more frequent visits, staff will try to get him to drink every time, all his medicine is provided in liquid form and he is to be made as comfortable as possible.
Next step is back oin a drip, but Mum has made it clear she does not want him back in hospital. He's dying of old age and she can cope with that. She couldn't bear to have him die of neglect.
Big sigh.
Not long now Grandad. Just the last weary pull up the hill.
I'm so sorry, Sundae.
I miss my grandparents. I was thinking about my grandma on Saturday, wishing I could ask her advice about something and wishing I'd asked her all this when I could. But, I didn't know that the situation would be something I'd ask her advice about, at the time. I don't really 'believe' in anything, but I feel like she's with me sometimes when I'm particularly sad and lonely.
I think a lot of my younger sis-in-law, when her grandfather died, and she told me the whole family was at his bedside and as sad as it was, it was a beautiful thing. She's really got her head on straight in dealing with passages. Me, not so much.
I wish your grandfather peace, and peace to you and to your mother.
I'm sorry, too, Sundae. I never know what to say in these situations.
I'm thinking of you and your family.
*hugs*
You have been there for him every step of the way, Sundae. I can only hope that when I am old, someone will come make me sandwiches and talk to me and love me as much as you have your grandad. I'm sorry for you and your mum that his time has come, but his time here was better for having you in it.
Sundae, I'm sorry that you are losing him.
I can only hope that when I am old, someone will come make me sandwiches and talk to me and love me as much as you have your grandad.
This.
Don't dwell on him as he is now, remember him how he was and talk to him about that. It will comfort both of you. Know that he is in no pain and the place you have chosen for him is a good one where his needs will be met.
So sad to read this. My sympathy to you and your family.
And what Monster said.
Daughter. Not home from dance. "I thught I'd OKd it with you to sleepover.....
but that's how teenagers are.
More than that.... why did the person (the most trustworthy and on the ball person I knew) who I arranged to give her a ride HOME not mention that this didn't happen?
SG - Clod and Monster are right on the button - but I think you know that. Hugs, dearie!
Monster - shouldn't this be in the pissed off parent thread?! No, but seriously, bummer that the supposed responsible one(s) didn't check in with you. Hugs, as well!
is overwhelming me this morning. About what, I have no idea. I have a huge vacuuous knot at the bottom of my ribcage, like the feeling you get when you hear the breadwinner of the household has been laid off, or you've been cheated of something that was dear to you. Not dead relative type bad. but bad. I don't get feelings like this very often and it's upsetting me. What is going to go wrong, how bad will it be and will I recover from it? I feel like whatever it is is something that isn't my fault and is undeserved, but also unpreventable. This is so weird. and horrible. I don't think it was something I ate last night......
Seriously, the feeling wasn't there first thing this morning, I slept well last night, but not enough so went back to bed between school runs, and then went back to bed again, but that's when this feeling arrived and I couldn't sleep even though I was still desperately tired.....
Am I going (more) insane? I feel like this sometimes when I've poked a wasps nest in some organization or other, but the nest I poked last night was very small and I just read the first reply which was positive and the feeling hasn't gone away. I'd've been almost relieved if it was that.....
Sorry you've got that feeling of dread. I get it from time to time and it sucks! Usually there's a good reason for it, like I've been procrastinating and the shit is about to hit the fan.
If you can't locate a reason, Monster, it's likely just a minor (and hopefully short-lived) chemical imbalance.
Last week I had a bad guilt-attack.
I couldn't trace it to anything.
It was like an emotional hangover from the (really serious) drinking days.
Luckily it was a school day - so I'd seen my parents already - no issues there. And then got into work - no-one had a problem with me there. And then Tiger had a fit of giggles at a conversation exercise I'd come up with and the knot seemed to dissolve.
Hope yours is of a similar duration.
Sorry you've got that feeling of dread. I get it from time to time and it sucks! Usually there's a good reason for it, like I've been procrastinating and the shit is about to hit the fan.
That reminds me ... :worried:
Monster, you're probably exhausted. You're always on the go, taking care of everyone and everything. So you take a few minutes to recognize the exhaustion and then you feel like you should be doing something. Your brain and body are out of synch. I bet you never take a day just for you.
I could be wrong. I'm just speculating?
Hope you feel better soon.
Sorry you've got that feeling of dread. I get it from time to time and it sucks! Usually there's a good reason for it, like I've been procrastinating and the shit is about to hit the fan.
yeah, that's totally the one. And I have been procrastinating (when have I not?) But I don't see the shit about to hit the fan. Well maybe I do, but i'm really not that bothered by that one......
oh dear. I guess it might be subsiding a little. nah, that's wishful thinking. it's kind of like I forgot to do a tax return, but I didn't. And the one filing i haven't done has no late penalty -I never do that one on time
Monster, you're probably exhausted. You're always on the go, taking care of everyone and everything. So you take a few minutes to recognize the exhaustion and then you feel like you should be doing something. Your brain and body are out of synch. I bet you never take a day just for you.
I could be wrong. I'm just speculating?
Hope you feel better soon.
thanks. I am exhausted. besst was away all weekend for the second weekend on the run and the schedule was nuts. But I do take time for me. Figure skating has started again. and pottery will start next week.....
The red light (stop light)
cameras are spreading across the US and Canada.
This site lets you zoom in on locations and you can add to their database if you know of more.
.
.
.
For our Aussie dwellars, these red light cameras are assets of the Redflex Corp, based in Victoria.
So every US and Canandian traffic ticket fine contributes $ to the Australian economy.
Maybe I should be buying stock in this company...
and No, I have not run one of these red lights (yet)
They just make me anxious and irritated because it's easy to forget they are always watching.
I might have got picked up by one of those cameras last weekend, but we were driving a car with no license plates so I'm probably OK.
I had a close one last week. I'm not sure if I slipped through or not. Two "hobos" jaywalked in front of me as I entered an intersection so I had to brake in the intersection for the camera...
If your cameras work like ours do, you should be okay. They get you if you enter the intersection against a red.
You still lose 200 points for failing to run down two jay-walking hobos, though.
I've been caught by one - a few years ago.
There is a lawyer somewhere who fights these cases. He wins every time.
I heard him on the radio one day doing an interview. There was also a piece about how they cause MORE accidents at some intersections and they are being removed.
Yes, some places have removed them... rear end collisions and the like.
But just like to other kinds of red light districts or the lotteries,
the $ can be hard to resist when the city has little/nothing to do but cash the check.
.
I love red light cameras and wish that every intersection had four. If every intersection had them, then people would actually stop for the red light every time. It's not hard, because they have these neat things called yellow lights that warn you when the red light is coming.
What I don't like are the speed cameras. The law tells us what the speed limit is, but everyone, including the police, knows that the speed limit isn't real. The real sped limit is some incremental amount above the actual speed limit. But there is no agreement on what this incremental amount is, and that causes problems. Who knows what the cameras are set for?
Income.
The thing that has always struck me as bogus about speed limits is when you get on a toll road where you take a ticket as you enter. The time you entered is stamped on the ticket as is the location. When you get off the highway it would be easy enough to note the time elapsed and distance traveled. Obvious if you were speeding the whole way. Wouldn't catch people who speed from rest stop to rest stop to bring down their average, but it would be a huge deterrent to everyone.
I also spoke with a guy who operated the MV emissions inspection at DMV in CT. They put the car on rollers and run it at 30mph. The machine displays your simulated speed. He said he has never seen a car's speedometer agree with the machine and usually they were off by 5-10mph. At 30mph!
So, it is an inexact science.
Income.
The thing that has always struck me as bogus about speed limits is when you get on a toll road where you take a ticket as you enter. The time you entered is stamped on the ticket as is the location. When you get off the highway it would be easy enough to note the time elapsed and distance traveled. Obvious if you were speeding the whole way. Wouldn't catch people who speed from rest stop to rest stop to bring down their average, but it would be a huge deterrent to everyone.
...
So, it is an inexact science.
But they could take a short-cut.
The cops just rely on the time honored speed trap around here. The next town east of mine has a speed limit that goes abruptly from 65mph to 35mph with no warning and a cop who hides behind the liquor store with his radar gun. If you're local, you know to slow down, but the tourists are caught in droves. That speed trap probably pays for 90% of municipal expenses.
monster - I know what you mean.
Some days are twisted humbugs and good only for small demons to feast upon.
well no shit fan combo occurred really. the next day was similar but not so bad, I tried to go back to bed the second time again (well i did) but then remembered someone was coming to drop stuff off "on their way to work" (so early ish) so i got up and showered and the uneasy eased...... I think it was some kind of guilt thing over going back to bed twice or something when i had shit to do, rather than any specific foreboading. If my conscious can give myself a break now and again, why can't my subconscious? :lol:
Busy day today: walk&run followed by figure skating class followed by gardening. some good sleep tonight I hope. Although thor currently in bed with fever, so there's a possibility of being up all night with feverish and not sleepy/barfing child.....
It started a couple of days ago.
Dazza complained that he feels pressured to come home at a certain time (which is not my intention) because I ask him what time he'll be home and I told him that if I don't ask, he doesn't tell me, and I always try to put a meal on the table for my family, so it gets wasted if he stays late and eats at the office etc. I told him that I consider it my job, and that if he doesn't at least try and let me know, he's showing no respect for the effort I put in for him.
Anyway, so the very next day, he sends me an email saying he wont be home till 9pm and I thought, well that's a start, but what happened was I left his dinner for him to reheat, but when he got home he said he'd already eaten, so I think, "fuck you with a fat stick sideways areshole! Don't you listen to a word I say???" I said nothing though because I'm sick of wasting my fucking breath.
So yesterday, I went to visit my cousin and another one came as well, and we were sitting having a chat and Lisa asks me how things are going with Annie (a cousin from the other side of the family) and I said fine as far as I know and so Lisa then tells me that she heard from the oldies that she's got hodgkins disease and they gave her the wrong Chemo and now she's going to die.
I lose myself in tears as they tell me my brother was telling the aunts at a familiy picnic we couldn't get to on the weekend because of other commitments.
So then I start to see red and wonder why my fuckhead of a brother can't pick up the phone and tell me, his only sister about our cousins illness before he tells family members who aren't even actually related!
I tried to ring my brother, but he didn't answer, so in the end, I rang Annie.
Turns out it's her mother (my dead mothers only sister), but she had hodgekins from ages ago and she's been undergoing treatment for it for many years and I'm very much aware of her situation, except that I didn't know he liver almost collapsed from all the drugs and that she was in hospital.
It's still very upsetting realising that the fight my Aunty Anne (yes, same name as her daughter) has been fighting is drawing to a close and that she's not expected to live all that much longer, but it's been on the cards for years, and we've all considered it a miracle that she's still with us, so not quite as bad as finding out my perfectly healthy cousin is about to die - which of course she's not, but for those minutes I suffered all the grief and shock just as if she was.
So pretty much people in my family doing the usual family gossip thing and everything gets ballsed up and I'm the one that has to go through that, on a day where I'm already feeling fragile because of the non words I've had with my husband.
So last night I drank two bottles of wine and took sleeping tablets.
Today I feel like shit, but at least I'm in control.
Wow Ali - thats a lot of bad to deal with all at once. (Hugs)
Income.
I was shocked when I found out how little the jurisdiction actually got and how much the police pay to have them there.
I guess there is a savings involved also from not having an officer at the intersection, but still.
It started a couple of days ago.
Anyway, so the very next day, he sends me an email saying he wont be home till 9pm and I thought, well that's a start, but what happened was I left his dinner for him to reheat, but when he got home he said he'd already eaten, so I think, "fuck you with a fat stick sideways areshole! Don't you listen to a word I say???" I said nothing though because I'm sick of wasting my fucking breath.
.
Ali, men are really clueless sometimes. He heard you said wanted to know when he's coming home. So, he emailed you the time. Perhaps he thought 9PM is late and that meant he wouldn't be eating at home. Tell him again that you'd like to know if he'll be eating at home or not so you can leave him dinner. And yes, add that you would also like to know when he's coming home if you would also like that info. Trust me, he may drop that info and just say he's gonna eat or not. It's not that they don't listen, they just sometimes don't understand what we're trying to say. I hope you feel better, Ali. :)
I agree with Lola - Its all the woman's fault. :rolleyes:
Lola, although I appreciate your suggestions, and they may partly be true, this is an ongoing issue which I've begged him to get help with because he's not getting the idea from me.
He had an abusive upbringing till he was about 12, after which time his mother basically left him to fend for himself. He's never learned how to care how his actions affect others and he was more or less single till we married 5 yrs ago. By single I mean he'd never really lived with a woman before. His living arrangements were either him by himself or with other bachelors.
He just has no idea, and after about 7 years of trying to show him a better way, I'm at my wits end. He needs counselling to deal with what happened to him as a child which is a direct catalyst to the type of behaviour I am trying to deal with now.
It's not that I don't love him or feel he doesn't love me. He just doesn't believe the issues are that bad, but they've just about reached breaking point because the kids are picking up his habits, and are starting to believe that's the way it's meant to be, and I'm not going to have that.
Anyway, can you tell I'm still pissed off?
Oh, and on top of that, my butthead brother hasn't apologised for his stupid decisions either. I'm surrounded by men who seem to think it's ok to treat me like a fucking idiot mushroom who needs to be fed a constant stream of shit.
Ack, Ali, hon, that sounds horrid. Hate that churned up feeling. Hope today gets brighter. And as you say, at least today you feel in control.
Thanks Dana. I think I'll have a nice hot shower then go to bed soon. I'm buggered, and it'll be a big day tomorrow. They're letting my Aunt go home, and I'm the one who's going to be taking her there, so I guess I'll probably be pretty busy with her most of the day. Then some friends are having a party for their 20th wedding anniversary in the evening, and then footy break up party on Saturday. I think I'll need a holiday soon.
A large, wet, muddy puddle under and around the fire hydrant in my front yard.
:facepalm:
Ali, just try to remember they are not doing this to hurt or upset you.
I'm sure both love you.
I'm not on a high horse, I'd be talking consideration and manners and all sorts of swear words if I was in that situation.
Maybe you & Dazza should consider counselling together. If'n you could ever get him there.
It doesn't mean crisis, it doesn't mean imminent break-up, it just means someone to mediate and give you ideas and examples of how to talk to eachother.
Re your bro - meh.
I can never please my sister. But then she doesn't give a shit about me. I'm only there to be complained about. Being blood does not mean thinking or feeling the same way.
It's shitty for you, but at least you have good people in your family so you can get the truth.
Hang in there chick.
Family (blood or marriage) conflict is the worst, because it leaves you without a safe haven.
Hope things get better.
Ali: Sorry to hear about your situation. I actually have more to say but being a single person, whatever opinions I have is just superficial and unrealistic to your situation. I hope everything will work out eventually. Btw, I'm glad today is better for you. (Saw your comment from another thread. :))
I'm upset because I feel like I'm losing a closeness I have with a friend that means a lot to me. :(
This morning I woke up and went to put on my glasses when I discovered that the left lens had fallen out. Huh? I'm sure it was there when I was reading in bed last night. I'd have noticed it was missing because my eye sight is awful. I am legally blind without corrective lenses. My back-up glasses are an old pair that is so scratched up, they are almost worthless.
So, I started the search with only one eye. I looked EVERYWHERE - under the bed, beside the bed. I shook out all the bed clothes - nothing. I got out the broom and swept under the bed - nothing except a few dust balls. I checked the hamper in my bedroom, shaking everything out - nothing. I have gone over my bedroom three times now - nothing. That lens has got to be there, but its not.
It will cost me two or three hundred dollars to order a replacement lens. I don't have two or three hundred dollars. And I bet as soon as I go down and order it (assuming I can scrape the money up), the damn lens will turn up somewhere. I'm probably missing it because I can only see out of one eye.
And I have a headache.
Damn, damn, damn...
I was shocked when I found out how little the jurisdiction actually got and how much the police pay to have them there.
I guess there is a savings involved also from not having an officer at the intersection, but still.
It's developed into a business. I think that is among the biggest complaints about them, not that they don't catch speeders or people who run the red lights. We have a few here.
It will cost me two or three hundred dollars to order a replacement lens. I don't have two or three hundred dollars. And I bet as soon as I go down and order it (assuming I can scrape the money up), the damn lens will turn up somewhere. I'm probably missing it because I can only see out of one eye.
And I have a headache.
Damn, damn, damn...
Seriously, buy that shit online. Just don't tell Spexxvet about it.
I know you can get deals on contact lenses on line, but it seems to me that lenses for glasses would be trickier. For one thing the lens would have to be ground to fit my frames which they don't have. :confused:
You just send them your frames or if you know the model number and make send them that info.
Check out:
http://www.cheapglasses123.com
http://www.39dollarglasses.com
http://www.eyeglasslensdirect.com/Hey thanks, Foot. Great prices! At those prices I can buy a decent set of spares if nothing else. I'll check them out. :)
no problem. Gong to a brick and mortar eyeglasses place is for rich people.
Okay.
So it turns out Grandad is nowhere near to the end of the road as Mum has been telling us.
I've had this before with her, but this time I thought she was for real.
But from what I heard today, she's known for some time.
It's not attention or sympathy seeking behaviour from her, it's just extreme pessimism and "preparing for the worst".
I went to visit Grandad with her today and heard with my own ears that "as we said before, he could stay in this situation for months". And then I overheard a phone call to her brother in which she made it clear that she'd told him in a previous weekly call.
Not me though. Yeah, thanks.
She's been shitty all day - possibly because she is worried about her dad hanging on and whether he is in pain. Possibly because she is just in a shitty mood anyway.
I'm getting one word answers from her - even when I was trying to sort out how we could both use the oven at the same time - me for bread, her for dinner tonight. Which I was dis-invited to. "You have your own dinner tonight, right? Just that there won't be enough to go round otherwise. We could stretch it of course..."
Yes, I have more than one thing I can eat tonight.
But the usual deal is I get my dinner served in the kitchen (since I refused to eat with her after the coughing incident when she disappeared for three days, oh and the time she ruined Christmas) and then I do as much of the washing and wiping up as I can while they are eating dessert at the dining table.
And she asked me at gone 15.00. Not this morning when we went to the supermarket together. Not 12.00 when I was going to the local shop to see if I could buy milk powder.
I don't mind it much. The coughing spasms passed a long while back (yup, they were an affectation) but I don't like hearing her spin on weekly events. It makes her out to be a cross between Joan of Arc and Mother Theresa, while describing everyone else as a drone or a complete arse.
I might feel differently tomorrow.
I over-react to her it's true.
But today she's done my nut.
Still. I can smell my beer bread rising.
And I can hear Diz knocking beebles through the cat maze.
Life could be worse.
*hugs*
My mom is driving me nuts, too, but for a diff. reason.
She forgets what she said five min. after she's said it and I can't fooking take it anymore.
I'm hearing the same shit every two minutes. She's got a gold-fish brain.
Sorry Bri. Dad's not down to two minutes but it is the same shit every time I talk to him.
Yep. I'm right there with ya, cept mine is still a teenager.
FTR she cheered up enormously and was lovely about my bread.
Realised today that she's gone for her final scan post-lumpectomy.
So I'm glad I came on here and vented rather than behaving like a bitch to her face.
Yep. I'm right there with ya, cept mine is still a teenager.
Just remember, its really frustrating for him, too. He's lucky to have a Dad who makes the attempt to listen, too.
a coworker that can't mind his own business and a panel that has more design flaws than a ford pinto. is today over yet?
Thanks Sam - I am learning patience that I previously never knew existed.
Off to a sort of "funeral service" tomorrow night. There is an official name, but I can't remember it. It's a Mass said when the deceased will be buried overseas. It might be a standard Requiem Mass.
It's the father of an old school friend (who I haven't reeally seen since I was 13).
We're going because Mum knows the family well and has been going to the same Mass as the couple for years. Me being at school with the daughter is secondary - I'm there for Mum, she's there for the wife.
But it will be sombre.
She's my age and her Dad has died.
I'm doing a practice run in decorating the Angry Bird cookies for my nephew's birthday party. They are so much more freaking hard than I thought. I over estimated myself. :( Now I'm really stressed that I can't pull this off. I finally had to take two Advil that I was putting off cuz I've been drinking meds every day the past week. Ugh!
I have an Angry Bird lanyard for mt whistle at school.
It's such a simple thing but gets me so many cool points!
Keep going Lola.
Remember they do not have to be perfect.
As long as the kids can recognise them, you are Super-Auntie!
the fact that I spent all day yesterday without internet. I call CenturyLink who says they are not having a problem...it must be my wiring or modem. So, they are supposed to come out today.
I get up this morning and the internet is working. I checked my modem and all the lights are on. So, I call them to update the trouble ticket. I tell them that it is now working, but I want someone to come out because the modem must be having trouble intermittently.
The wife calls me to tell me that they guy was out and it was a problem on THEIR end! You couldn't call to tell us that? And why did you not know when I called yesterday...or when you called back later that evening to see if my internet was still down?
I lost a friend of mine from HS on Friday...apparently, he committed suicide. I believe this is the first friend/relative I've lost to suicide. It's horribly sad...he was always one of the most laid-back and funniest people I knew.
You just never know what lurks beneath the surface.
The professor who taught my major 'special interest' module in my final year of undergrad and supervised my dissertation, was also going to be my supervisor for my Masters, but had to go on an extended leave due to throat cancer. Earlier in the year she appeared to be doing better, but had announced that she was going to retire. There was supposed to be a little party at the faculty a couple of weeks ago for her retirement. Got an email the week before to say Katrina wouldn't be able to come after all as her health had deteriorated significantly.
I just checked my emails and there's one from the head of school to say that she has now moved to a hospice, and that her partner, children and siblings are with her. She is too weak for visitors.
I'm really struggling not to cry. It's so fucking unfair. This woman is so fiercely intelligent, warm, caring, lovely and brilliant. I'm feeling a little guilty that I didn't maintain contact with her after she went on leave. I was just so wrapped up in my work, and (minor) health problems of my own, y'know how these things go. That and the context of our contact had gone largely.
It's not a major feeling of guilt. Just a niggle. Mostly I'm just really saddened.
Fuck cancer.
@ Syc: that's terribly sad. It's such a shock when someone who seems so together commits suicide.
Sorry guys, those are both difficult things to sort out.
wow. Suicide and throat cancer.
Tough to imagine either one.
I think throat cancer would be the very worst - I'm so sorry Dana and Sycamore, for your friends suffering. Ugh. Life is a weird and awful bitch sometimes.
I lost a friend of mine from HS on Friday...apparently, he committed suicide. I believe this is the first friend/relative I've lost to suicide. It's horribly sad...he was always one of the most laid-back and funniest people I knew.
You just never know what lurks beneath the surface.
It seems the "most laid-back and funny" people are the ones who are most sensitive and prone to the vagaries of life.
Drowning not waving, as the poem goes.
I'm so sorry for this, Syc. It's so hard for the survivors.
wss ^
Warm thoughts to those suffering. :(
Sorry to hear that Syc. I saw your link on FB. He seemed to be such a great guy.
@Syc - Sorry, man. Prayers for his family and friends.
@Dana - Fuck Cancer. Prayers for her family and friends as well.
Sorry to hear that Dana. Didn't you mention something about this before ... or was that a political friend?
I think I mentioned something about it. There've been a few such stories lately unfortunately. Our Stell, Romy - a family friend/non-blood relative of my ex - and Katrina, my former professor.
I think I posted abot Katrina when she first had to go on extended sick leave. It was a little after the start of my MA. She was down as my co-supervisor along with my current supervisor. That was late 2009/early 2010 (can't recall exactly, my timings all off :p).
I think one of the things that's getting to me about Katrina, is that alongside the loss to her family and friends, the world is losing a fabulous mind and a brilliant historian. Someone who was doing genuinely important (in my opinion) work.
Wrapped up an aggravated domestic violence case on a man who beat his pregnant girlfriend and then threatened her with a pistol for trying to call for help. Hipaa prohibits me from stating the status of the fetus, but the suspect has a $2 million bond. Can you read between the lines??
I'm so disgusted!
Thank you for dealing with that shit, Sarge. Very seriously, thank you.
._________________. a line.
Uhhhh, is this in the right thread?
I guess not... I was reading about angry birds and that is where I posted it, immediately... My bad.
Grandad's still hanging on, but is getting morphine twice daily now.
The doctor told Mum it's likely that he has prostate cancer, but it is too late to do any tests and certainly too late for treatment.
So he's in limbo to an extent.
Dying, yes, but not really with us either.
We have agreed the hymns for his funeral between us.
My sister came over with a suggestion last night, but it's not well known enough to include. No point having something people are hesitant about singing.
After she left, Mum said, "I told her we were choosing hymns and she obviously felt left out and came rushing over!"
Bless her. It was obvious and quite right that Mum had asked her for suggestions too. How could I be upset about that? Ah well.
Isn't it nice that your Grandad has a caring family? :) He is so lucky you are all taking care of everything.
Someone cleaned out my bill paying bank account today. Not allot in it I only use this account to auto pay bills so when I got an over draft email I was shocked. After an hour on the phone [major annoying] all has been credited until the "investigation" concludes. [45 days] :eek2: I don't know how anyone would get that account card # unless one of my bill payees has been compromised. It's not used for anything else. :mad2:
Grandad's still hanging on, but is getting morphine twice daily now.
The doctor told Mum it's likely that he has prostate cancer, but it is too late to do any tests and certainly too late for treatment.
So he's in limbo to an extent.
Dying, yes, but not really with us either.
We have agreed the hymns for his funeral between us.
My sister came over with a suggestion last night, but it's not well known enough to include. No point having something people are hesitant about singing.
After she left, Mum said, "I told her we were choosing hymns and she obviously felt left out and came rushing over!"
Bless her. It was obvious and quite right that Mum had asked her for suggestions too. How could I be upset about that? Ah well.
Ach. Hugs and warm thoughts, hon.
Nice that your mum was watchful of your feelings. At a time like this, that's kind of cool.
Why is it too late to do tests? They can always do tests to find out what's wrong. Maybe he just has kidney stones or something?
Why is it too late to do tests? They can always do tests to find out what's wrong. Maybe he just has kidney stones or something?
I believe he's only partially aware of his surroundings and very elderly. Too late in his life, not necessarily to late in the life of the cancer. Even if it was "just kidney stones", it sounds like he's too weak/far gone for any treatment to serve any purpose/be anything other than undignifying intrusions on his peace.
I could be wrong and if so, I apologise for my insensitivity.
That's what I took it to mean as well. There was a point where they realized my elderly grandmother had some kind of cancer--but they said 1.) she wouldn't survive surgery or any kind of treatment for it, and 2.) it was a slow-growing kind and would take at least 2-3 years to kill her, and she was going to succumb to any number of other things long before that.
I was thinking of paliative relief really. Sometimes morphine is not the best drug or whatever. I just wondered.
Monster and Clod were right - it's the fact that he's very frail now, rarely fully conscious and no longer even responds to Mum's voice. Occasionally she comes home and says he was aware or intelligible. Of course these are the times that make her cry more.
Re cancer, it's possible they've already tested his urine but are not willing to give him a biopsy?
I have to trust that the doctor who upped his morphine dose is prescribing in an informed way. I can't say any more than that, as it was filtered through Mum.
And no, I won't be offended by any questions or suggested answers.
This is the only place I get to discuss it openly, without having people wince.
Mum and I talk about it, but I have to tread a fine line between being objective so she feels she can depend on me, and being sensitive so she knows I care.
I'll have to start doing more for her.
At least I'm home next week. Even something as simple as making her a cup of tea when she gets back will share the love.
he's led a long and full life. give him morphine for pain and let him go in peace. it's hard to do, but probably the only reasonable action.
Exchange 2003 problems, new hardware does not arrive until Monday. Harddrives getting harder to source (Thailand flooding). IT? Why did I choose it as a profession?
Injury added to insult by my bank
We have completed our investigation of this claim and determined that an error did occur. We have sent a letter by mail with the details of our investigation.
Please refer to the letter for the final amount credited.
Ok but you made me cut up my f$%^ing card for your error! :mad: Maybe I should charge them the $35 f6%^^ing dollars they were going to charge me for INSF. :mad2:
Welcome SirF. and IT was definitely the wrong choice. :D
Hey Fatty. Didn't understand a word of your post but hello anyway :)
Ah well.
Made cake. And tea.
Wrong thing to do.
She went out for tea and cake this afternoon.
"Oh I've had enough of that!"
Left cake out for her in case she fancied it later.
Wrong thing to do.
"I'd better put that away for you - it'll go dry otherwise!"
No it won't, it's a rum soaked cake.
"I hope it's not like the one last week, that was too much for me!"
Well actually it's not as potent, but nice of you to flag that up before you tasted it.
Yes, I am far too sensitive to her opinions.
I'll make what she likes next time.
Which is fair enough.
If she'd made me banana and peanut butter cookies I might have been more polite, but I'd still have avoided them.
So, when she said these things, did the conversation actually go something like this (rather than the internal thoughts you posted):
"Oh I've had enough of that!"
Sundae: Oh dear, I made it specially because I thought you had been a bit down and I wanted to cheer you up. Shall I leave it out in case you fancy a bit later?"
"I'd better put that away for you - it'll go dry otherwise!"
Sundae: Thanks, I'm sorry you didn't fancy any.
""I hope it's not like the one last week, that was too much for me!"
Sundae, No, I realised that was too much for you, so I made this one less potent.
...or did you say nothing or did you say pretty much what you posted here?
Also, why a booze-soaked cake? And only a week after another one? Seemes a bit excessive, especially if it's not noted as her favorite? Maybe she is terse because she is worried about you making so many alcolol laced cakes as well as grandad? I know i've been away 10 years, but in my "circle" alcohol cakes were really only made in birthdays and at Christmas, if at all. I've certainly never made one -and I wouldn't have one with a cup of tea. Although I wouldn't lace tea with spirits either, and I know that's not uncommon.
Exchange 2003 problems, new hardware does not arrive until Monday. Harddrives getting harder to source (Thailand flooding). IT? Why did I choose it as a profession?
Masochism?
Oh, and welcome.
Back in the hospital. CT scan shows fistulas in the area where they did the surgery last April. I am sick and tired of being sick and tired.
Oh, I am sorry to hear that.
I think we all do our best to help in most situations, and sometimes we get it wrong, but in the end, it's the love we put into it that counts. Even if you don't like what's on offer, you have to appreciate the effort someone went to just for you.
That's how things work in my world anyway. I know it's not like that in everyone's world, but still...
Life fucking sux sometimes, and no matter what you do people still feel sad. Hopefully when they don't feel so sad they'll remember and things will be better in the future.
Back in the hospital. CT scan shows fistulas in the area where they did the surgery last April. I am sick and tired of being sick and tired.
That's a bummer Pete. I don't really know what fistulas are, but I did see some German porn once that was called to mind by your post.
So what do they do now Pete?
I did see some German porn once that was called to mind by your post.
:D
So what do they do now Pete?
I dunno long term. Right now they're giving me antibiotics.
German porn often ends that way.
Exchange 2003 problems, new hardware does not arrive until Monday. Harddrives getting harder to source (Thailand flooding). IT? Why did I choose it as a profession?
tag up, bro.
I *got* this.
Monster, I didn't make the responses I posted here, I just wrote my internal conversation.
And the only reason I made another run one was because I had some rum glaze to use up. Less than last time and no rum in the cake.
But in hindsight it was daft of me to think that the cake would be a lovely reat after she's just been out for afternoon tea :)
Pete - sorry to hear that. Fingers crossed that antibiotics will work.
Monster, I didn't make the responses I posted here, I just wrote my internal conversation.
And the only reason I made another run one was because I had some rum glaze to use up. Less than last time and no rum in the cake.
But in hindsight it was daft of me to think that the cake would be a lovely reat after she's just been out for afternoon tea :)
Pete - sorry to hear that. Fingers crossed that antibiotics will work.
Yeah I assumed that was internal dialogue, I'm just wondering why she's so aggressive, doesn't make any sense....
It's her set reaction to most situations - stress, shock, surprise etc.
She's worse with Dad.
Still, we had a chat about it today.
She said she just preferred a normal chocolate cake with chocolate icing. Which is fair enough, I'll save the special ones for school. I might make her some rock buns in a week or so, I know she likes those.
Turns out Grandad's semi-diagnosis comes from ruling out different areas from the cancer suspect list. Also that he had an operation on his prostate about 30 years ago. Apparently when they asked the surgeon back then whether there was any chance of recurring symptoms he scoffed "I wouldn't worry about that my man, you'll be fine for at least another fifteen years and you probably won't we with us by then, yukyukyuk." Of course, that's Mum's report of the conversation!
He is unable to eat now, only taking small sips of liquid.
The Manager of the home says she's surprised he's hanging on.
Which I think is rather insensitive.
But again, she might not have said it in those words.
I dreamed last night that I was on holiday and was unpicking a black blouse and trying to resew it for his funeral. We were supposed to be leaving at 8pm but at 4.30pm I was still sitting in bed messing about with the blouse, and I hadn't even started redecorating the room so that I would get my depsoit back...
Sorry Pete - hope that whatever they do creates a better situation for you.
*hugs Sundae*
@ Pete: that sucks m'dear. Hope they can sort it out fast.
Yesterday we all got emails to tell us that Katrina passed away. Her family and friends have lost a wonderful woman. The world has lost a brilliant scholar and a truly inspiring teacher.
Fuck cancer.
That is sad. Dana, we know you will miss her,
and that she made an important impact on you and your career.
sorry to hear that Dana. (hugs)
oh and FUCK CANCER
So sorry Dani.
It's hard to lose anyone, but especially someone who has made such an impression.
Mum has been asked to name her funeral home of choice by the nursing staff.
Of course she knew it already and has all the plans in place, but it's obviously intended as an advance warning.
I'm so sorry for your loss, Dana.
My deepest sympathies, Dana. :(
we're sorry Dana. lost my dad to cancer and think i mentioned somewhere that my roommate just had his prostate removed because of cancer. oh and Gnomey has something to say:
*smiles*
You guys rock.
We had a little gathering for her in the school, just a few staff and postgrads, a couple of her former students. It was nice.
I didn't really know her all that well. Others of her circle are suffering genuine grief, so I feel slightly fraudulent accepting your condolences. I'll accept them on their behalf.
I am saddened though. I regret that I never got the chance to get to know her as a colleague, rather than as her student. I also regret that she isn't, and hasn't been, around on my first teaching experiences. She had a reputation for being immesely supportive and helpful with early career teachers in the school. Hers was a friendship I'd have courted.
RIP James Arthur Doyle
28/02/1923 - 28/10/2011
Died peacefully in bed this evening with Mum, Dad, Laura and me in the room.
So sorry Sundae. Peace be with you.
Warm thoughts to you and your family Sundae. I'm glad he went peacefully with his loved ones with him: it's the most any of us could ask for.
RIP Sundae's Grandpa
My heart goes out to your family.
Warm thoughts is right. Sundae. Thank you for sharing it all with us.
I am hoisting an apple juice in his honor.
A good life for a good man. I'm glad you all could be there for him. If I could, I'd be there to hug both you and your mom.
Thoughts and prayers to you and your family.
Remember the good times. From what you have said here he certainly was a wonderful man.
I never met him. But your posts and pics made me feel almost like I did a little. So sorry for your loss. Glad you could be there with him.
*hugs*
Peace to you and yours Sundae.
RIP James Arthur Doyle
28/02/1923 - 28/10/2011
Died peacefully in bed this evening with Mum, Dad, Laura and me in the room.
Dear Sundae: My deepest condolences. This is very sad and upsetting news. I often wonder whether it is better for people to slowly wither away; or to pass away suddenly (like in a plane crash.)
He lived a very long life...
Wishing you the best...
Pam.
Sundae, my thoughts are with you.
Dear Sundae
I know this is a painful time. I don't have anything to soothe that pain but I will remind you that you have my support, and the support of everyone here. Support and care for you and for your family. Keep that in mind, please.
Yours,
So sorry for your loss Sundae. Hugs to you and your family.
Thank you all.
It's tougher than I thought it would be.
Now he's no longer the shell he became in the last week I am free to remember him as he was and that means mourning him.
But he had a long life and in the end a gentle death.
He wouldn't really have planned on 17 years without my Nan, she really was the love of his life. But he was in his own place until February this year. He had as much fried chicken as he wanted up til then. And he was in a stable environment when he died, with staff constantly in attendance in the last hours until they realised the end was coming and called us.
It's not like he was in that awful hospital where he could easily have been dead for hours without anyone noticing.
The staff came in to say goodbye as I was leaving (I came home to start making phone calls) and they were in tears. It was a good place to die, with kind and respectful people. Grandad used to joke that he couldn't understand a word any of them said (the basic carers are mostly Eastern European or Filipino) but he would always smile and nod and joke and they were charmed by his passive smile and gentle demeanor.
They really cared. Even as I was leaving they were bringing in tea for Mum and me. And the Nurse on shift had elected to stay until the Doctor came to sign the death certificate, despite her shift finishing 30 minutes beforehand.
We couldn't have asked for better.
It is really nice to hear that the staff treated you so nicely and were so kind during such a difficult time in your lives. Stark contrast to some things I've heard/read here.
My heart is heavy as I read about this. It reminds me of my grandfathers last days.
(Hugs)
Found out in another thread.
Sundae, I'm so sorry to hear about your grandfather.
As Classic said, it reminds me of when my own grandfather passed.
:blackr:
Thanks Grav - I've now put it in my sig, because I mentioned him across a lot of threads when he was alive, and I know not everyone reads this one.
I'll take it off in a day or so.
Sorry for your loss SG ,
But at least its over ,
I remember waiting for my Mom to pass over , it SUCKED !!!
Sundae, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. There's no truly nice way to lose someone, but it sounds like your Grandpa went as peacefully as one can, and you and your family had the opportunity to say goodbye.
Again, thanks to everyone.
My first day in my Sunday job today.
I was awake early even by normal standards, and the clocks went back today.
The 'rents got up at 07.30 (GMT) but I already had some thinking time.
So odd. Like something is over and leaves such a large gap.
But there is still so much to plan and organise. Which is usually only for good things.
Mum went to all the neighbours yesterday (I offered to go or to accompany).
"The Asians" across the close came to visit when Mum was at Mass, with flowers and a card.
We know their names now.
And Mum told Tiger's Grandmother (his father's mother, who used to live next door to my sister - small world).
He was so much a part of my (our) routine.
I feel bloody awful that I am starting a new job today, facing people, smiling, learning, being positive. And he is in a drawer somewhere waiting for his doctor to sign him off.
Not him of course. In my belief, he is simply a corpse. In my Mum's he is with his deceased family.
But it seems to hurt either way.
Funeral next week (ie not this monday to Friday)
I already had dresses earmarked on eBay.
Grandad loved my haircolours in the last few years.
he said I was easy to spot.
As a younger man they would have appalled him - he was so conservative.
Sorry - simply posting what is in my head.
Thanks everyone again.
All my love to you Sundae. Sorry I'm so late in arriving here, but my heart is with you now. xxx
Oh, Cherry. I am so sorry. Try to take comfort in knowing how much he was loved and cared for by you and your family. He was a special man loved by very special, wonderful people. It doesn't get much better than that.
Hugs, girl. Hugs.
Grandad loved my haircolours in the last few years.
he said I was easy to spot.
As a younger man they would have appalled him - he was so conservative.
This struck me as particularly poignant, not just about your Granddad but of growing old in general. It's a beautiful picture of happy mellowing.
So sorry to be late on this bit of news. Sundae, I hope you remember your Grandad in the best way. He will always be with you. Peace
sorry for your loss sundae.
unfortunately i found out early this afternoon that a friend passed away. she was 43. when i moved in with my roommate over 2 years ago that's how i met her. they were dating back then but since had become just friends. she used to drive me nuts sometimes but i loved her for who she was. she was your average happy-go-lucky person that cared for everyone, even strangers and never had any ill will towards anyone or anything for that matter. yesterday according to her mother she drank an entire bottle of vodka without eating anything. so, yes, alcohol was a factor. i'm thinking she knocked her blood sugars way out of whack and went into some sort of hypoglycemic shock. her mother said that she had gotten up around 5 am this morning to use the restroom and had fallen twice trying to get back to the bed. that was the last time she was seen alive. her mom went in to check on her late this morning and found her laying there in bed. only a shell. spirit and soul gone. gonna miss you Michelle.
Damn ... Sorry dude. no words..
Mum went to thank "the Asians" today.
Had a cup of tea, and we were all invited over for dinner whenever we wanted to come.
Mum won't. Dad wouldn't be able to understand a word (hearing related). I would!
But apart from our next door neighbours (of nearly 40 years), they are the only family in the close to respond to the news. Of course everyone has been supportive - Mum talks to everyone and they all knew about Grandad even if they didn't know him.
But I'd like to think the 'rents will remember this when their paper fulminates about ALL Muslims wanting Sharia law in the country etc blah etc.
Although the older Dads gets the more I think he would actually appreciate living in a fundamentalist regime. As long as he had freedom of worship he wouldn't even worry which one. As long as people were killed or mutilated for their crimes...
Sorry, off topic.
Today was horrid.
I expected it to be.
Newbie, ignorant, under-trained (as everyone is) AND feeling sorrow.
But it's a job and I am being paid for it.
And Grandad always spoke up for me for that.
When Mum was moaning about me, he always said something along the lines of "Well, she's pulled her weight before" or "She's a hard worker, give her time" or somesuch. And she passed it on to me.
Filthy, that's awful.
It scares me.
It could be me or Bri.
I didn't know you, Michelle, but I know how it happened.
Newbie, ignorant, under-trained (as everyone is) AND feeling sorrow.
But it's a job and I am being paid for it.
And Grandad always spoke up for me for that.
When Mum was moaning about me, he always said something along the lines of "Well, she's pulled her weight before" or "She's a hard worker, give her time" or somesuch. And she passed it on to me.
Filthy, that's awful.
It scares me.
It could be me or Bri.
I didn't know you, Michelle, but I know how it happened.
keep up hard work hun. it's rewarding as you know. you'll get to know the ropes and like everyone else do the job. when i started working at my day job, jeeez! the things i didn't know! from a hands on perspective? i thought for sure i'd get fired for breaking a few things accidentally. i saw what i work with and designed what i work with for YEARS but never had to hands on experience with them. now i help train new hires and watch over their shoulders and give them pointers to help them along. i'm the #3 guy to go to now for questions and how to's. some get it, some don't as with any job.
ty about Michelle. it could be anyone. even me. just damn. 43? damn it. not that it's ok if they're 83. sad either way.
That's awful, Filthy. How horribly sad and untimely.
So much sadness here today. Puts petty complaints into perspective doesn't it.
I think I'll just sew up Mav's shorts that I don't think he should be wearing to school anymore even though they're the only one's he wants to wear.
I was pretty hard on him about it last night, and now I regret it. What if I lose him today and the last thing we talked about was why he shouldn't wear those shorts to school?
Now I really am upset.
I'm sorry plth. That's a terrible death for anyone. xxx
phlthy - adding my condolences. I think it brings us all up short that one foolish decision can be fatal.
Wow phlthy - I am so sorry.
Sundae is right - It could so easily have been either one of us. I've done very similar things - drinking an entire fifth of vodka on an empty stomach (really, there's no other way to drink for me) fallling, etc. I have to wonder why Michelle and not me?
I am grateful for this day and I am grateful that I am sober.
I am so very sorry for your friend. Peace to her and her family and you.
thanks everyone. i'm still numb but at the same time getting more and more pissed off. found out today that mom is donating her to medical science. ok. no biggie here. i'm down with advancing medicine or teaching tomorrows doctors today. what irks me bad is the fact that there will be no service. no memorial. reason? no money. wait! WHAT? not to go into detail but i don't buy it. michelle may have been a free floating soul and what not but she cared for people and loved people for who they were. a true sweetheart. she doesn't deserve this. bri and sundae? keep up the hard work. i know it's difficult. hugs to y'all! hugs to all!
What's to stop you and your roommate organising a memorial meeting at your place? The only cost involved is on contacting everyone. The structure can be quite simple. PM me if you want help on arranging a do-it-yourself memorial meeting/service - I have experience.
Sorry man. Limey's idea sounds like a good one.
limey - that is an excellent idea.
Sigh.
Bitterness and jealousy.
From me.
Laura will read the Reading.
It's not very long, but it is significant.
And I chose it.
Stevo gets to read something at the end - okay, it's a thank you and an invite to people to the Crem and the buffet afterwards.
I get the bidding prayers.
Prayers.
Me.
No personal input, lines on a page, something I don't even believe in.
I have been complimented on my speaking voice.
How come my sister gets the starring role?
Yes, she saw Grandad more in the nursing home than I did.
But when he had his own bungalow, who went on foot to get his shopping?
Who rushed home with KFC or fish n chips so they were still warm (and then had him tell me to put them in the fridge :))
Who searched the whole of the town centre for something he might like?
Who did all his washing and ironing when Mum was away, and every Saturday when she was home?
Who had to clean him up after "accidents"?
Laura never washed shit off his cock and balls.
But she gets to dress his coffin, have her favourite hymn at the Crem and do the Reading.
I don't resent what I did for Grandad, I'd do it again in a second.
I don't resent Mum making her own choices.
I'm just petty and spiteful and need to get over it.
SG, I know it's a hard time for your family, but it's not a competition mate. It really doesn't matter who does what at the funeral. Just be there and celebrate your grandad's life and mourn his passing. At the end of the day, no one is really going to remember much except maybe the eulogy anyway.
Chin up. xxx
eta: What I'm trying to say is, don't make the day even worse by worrying about stuff like that. No one's going to judge you if you're reading the prayers, and some will put a whole lot more weight on that than a reading anyway. Try to remember that it's not about you or your sister or anyone but your grandad. Try and create some good memories of the day. Don't cloud the day with anger on top of grief. xxx
I'm sorry Sundae. That would hurt my feelings too. But you just be the best damn prayer-reader who ever spoke on the planet. You were probably chosen for that because you WILL do it very well. Maybe perfection is what your mom wanted for the prayer; and you can deliver.
Sorry Sundae, from what I've read here, that just doesn't seem right.
After the prayers could you say something like on a personal note...
and then add a few things of your own.
Classic is right - once you're up there you can add a few lines from yourself before or after the prayers. No-one can stop you. Big hugs (to be delivered in person soon, grrl!)
Ali has it right - it's not a competition.
I've always felt like I am in my sister's shadow and things like this bring it out in me.
I've said to Mum again and again, "Don't worry about me, it's your Dad's funeral, you do what you want."
The last thing she needs is squabbling daughters.
And my sister, for all her meek and mild appearance has a will of iron and propriety is very much her thing. For example she very much felt the fact that she didn't get to participate in Aunty Alice's funeral. She admitted she could not have stood up and delivered an off the cuff eulogy as I was called to do, but still mentioned many times afterwards that she should have been included and no-one knew who she was on the day.
I think it was losing the poem at the Crem that tipped me over the edge.
But looking back I didn't even mention it!
Anyway, it's silly because Mum was going to read a poem too, and she cut that as well, so it really wasn't personal.
Thanks for letting me sound off about something that really doesn't show me at my best.
I've got it out of my system without hurting anyone.
I really feel so much sympathy for you mate. My brother and I were really at odds by the time we got to Mum's funeral, and it was a really hard time made much worse because we refused to lean on each other. Too proud and stubborn and selfish and a whole lot of other stupid emotions that really didn't help.
Since then I've watched people tear each other down over funerals and have thought it's such a shame, but knowing it's just so much emotion on the surface that no one really knows if they're arthur or martha half the time.
You just do your best and sort it all out later over a cuppa or a stiff drink. Either way, you're all in the same boat so I guess you'll just float along as best you can. xxx
Ali's post brought back such memories.
When my grandfather died, my Mom went back to the home town for the funeral.
She and her brother got into a squabble over a stick of gum she found in her Dad's coat pocket.
Gum was a thing with him, a constant chewer.
Anyhow, that squabble led to a life-time fight that they never resolved.
I still don't know which one I thought was the thickheaded.
My sister is a stranger to me, to be honest.
My most frequent dreams involve conflict with my Mum and my sister, sometimes ending in violence (against Laura, never against Mum!)
Except when I wake up I realise I was the one in the wrong...
But hey - I love my brother and we can talk and do things together.
I just wish he'd had children rather than my sister.
I have a niece and nephew I have no real love for.
They're good kids, but we live in the same town and I see them two or three times a year. Mum sees them more, but as she says, Nanny and Grandad saw us more often and they lived in London.
And no, you do not just drop by my sister's house.
She or her husband will stand at the door and make it clear you are not welcome.
Although she uses her own key to drop in on us on the few occasions she wants to...
And good luck getting an "appointment".
Although in this, Laura is the same as Mum.
She thinks she had an open house when we were growing up.
Oh nonononono...
I've grown up the same - VERY private.
Well, a lot of that has been about mental health issues.
When things were bad my house looked like the Council Tip.
Dana knows.
Anyway.
Things are calm here now.
Notice posted in local paper (£100! blimey), flowers ordered, funeral date set 14/11/11.
I'll do whatever I can to make Mum's day the best it can possibly be.
She'll spit fury at Dad at some point. I will ignore it (as will he).
I will be practical and sensible and have a stiff upper lip.
I will make sandwiches and cook chipolatas and pizza slices and all that.
I'll have Steven beside me.
And an international Dwellar brigade standing invisible at your shoulder.
Tense and emotional times rarely harmonise a family. You're doing great. And it doesn't not show you at your best either y'know. What counts isn't what swims through your mind, it's what gets said and acted upon.
And an international Dwellar brigade standing invisible at your shoulder.
:thumbsup:
What counts isn't what swims through your mind, it's what gets said and acted upon.
I love this.
I love that, too. Kisses, Sundae.
Had a lovely day with my sister - driving home thru the pretty countryside, 66 degrees and sunny with lovely trees, etc. Thirty seconds from my front door I got a speeding ticket.
105.00 dollars.
Sheesh.
if only you'd been going a little faster you've been home free!
if only you'd been going a little faster you've been home free!
:)
I keep telling myself it could be so much worse.
I could get caught for what I REALLY do instead of just speeding.
;)
so you *are* home free!
I'm feeling better about it already!
:driving: <<< me
:cop: <<< cop
I hate my job and I hate my life and I want to give up. I don't want to die. I just want to give up.
It's the same every day. Run with the rats, get off the treadmill, sleep. Be a smiling obedient rat, lest you get wished into the cornfield.
Who has time for instability? If you fall off the line, it takes hours to get back on it. Hours of despair and rage. For what? For fucking what?
I want to give up. Chuck it all and go on crazy pay. Become the less than good human I feel pegged as. Why not? Why not? Oh, it would disappoint 'everyone else' and God forbid I do that. I wasn't taught to deal with looking out for #1.
I'm just # 434325234343453878973647634, and I don't want to do it anymore.
Thank you for listening.
It helps to have something to look forward to. You should should start planning a vacation. Doesn't have to be big and expensive. It also helps to have small fun things every once in a while. Plan a weekend activity out of the routine a couple weeks from now. Or take an adult ed class, like pottery or something new. You just need to shake things up a little bit. You don't need to quit everything.
Anon, when I had my final big crazy episode it felt like I fell off the edge of the world.
Oh, and the one before that.
Oh yes, and the one where I quit my full time job.
Okay, so I have had a series of adventures which start with me giving up.
Quitting my job in Leicester. Shock horror, lack of security and stability.
Moving to London - somewhere I swore I would never live again.
Being chucked out of the house - technically homeless.
Losing my full time job - have to move home with the parents!
Blagging things for a couple of months then having such a meltdown I had to attend a mental health unit every day...
There's always one step further to go.
And oddly, when things get that bad you are glad to take it.
You might find you get to the point when you have to surrender.
Thing is, people offer help then.
People who are barely balancing are rarely assisted, because the plates are still turning, so it can't be that bad, right? Wrong.
Only you know how much you can take.
I hope this is something that will pass.
It sounds devastating for the moment though.
Hold onto the thought you are valued and loved somewhere, by someone.
Anonymous - hang in there, child.
Today is weary and grim and rather blue (or maybe raw umber?) a real, live November day. Today feels like too much for me, too, to handle. Really. I came here to start a bitch session and saw your post and I know that someone else out there feels the way I do. I'm not alone. YOU'RE not alone. I'm here and I feel your weary, grim blueness.
Sometimes I make little bets with myself to get thru the day: Get out of bed and that's all you need to do. Then a little later, take a shower and then that's all you need to to...and so on. It's tedious and childish but sometimes that is what gets me thru the day.
Hugs to you. and a flower, too. :flower:
PS - the work place is a shark tank. Get out if you can.
I understand anon. Except now I have no job and feel even worse about myself.
I understand anon. Except now I have no job and feel even worse about myself.
what? You lost your job??
oh, I am so sorry classic. I really am.
gawd how shitty.
thanks. Still fucking sucks. With everything else that's going on right now, adding unemployment to the issue is REALLY pushing me closer to the edge.
Anon, I guess my point was that at least working made me feel productive in some ways. Like I was contributing. Right now ... not so much.
Yeh, we are all just insignificant like a number in some ways, BUT that is YOUR number and you do the best you can with it. Those important to you will remember and respect you for your accomplishments even though sometimes we cannot see that.
If its a life change you are looking for, get started and look at your current situation as temporary. Maybe that'll help. Again, sorry.
Anon, three or four people here have said, basically, see if there is one little thing you can change to give yourself something to look forward to. If you find it difficult or impossible to get the energy together to do that then you may well be clinically depressed and a trip to your doctor would be just the thing. If you feel "meh, why bother" about that suggestion then you should definitely go.
I know this sounds flippant, but all of us (so far) that have chipped in with comments on your plight have our own experience to draw on. We really have been there .... And we care about you.
Life can be a real shitter sometimes anon. I don't have any better advice than what's been said already.
I really hope you can turn things around for yourself. Sometimes it really is as simple as changing your attitude towards some things, but other times you have to make changes externally. I guess only you know which it has to be in order for you to get through. Whichever way you go, I'm sure you have friends here who can help you through this time. xx
I burned myself last week. Fucking carelessness on my part, was cooking and splashed some hot oil out of the pan, onto my hand and onto my bare foot. fucking ouch. First pair was the night of the crime (friday), second pair is rfn. My hand's feeling ok. The thin skin over the burn was chafed off by my gloves during the hike. My foot came through the hike fine, but I recently lost the skin over that burn too. It hurts and my foot's swelling. I just want it to dry out and skin over, but that's not happening very fast. Upsetting and painful.
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Yuck V. Just yuck.
You need to get something to dry that out with, and be really careful it doesn't get infected. That's the biggest problem with burns like that.
Hope it gets better soon though. It looks really painful.
Yuck V. Just yuck.
You need to get something to dry that out with, and be really careful it doesn't get infected. That's the biggest problem with burns like that.
Hope it gets better soon though. It looks really painful.
Yes, particularly on the foot where Pseudomonas infections (green ooze, awful smelly, ugh !) can get started and can be hard to treat.
Dude, a couple of those are serious burns. You need them treated.
holy jesus foot, stigmata boy.
nurse!
bandage this, Stat!
Uday no longer has his poker game on Friday night. :(
Also, this coffee is shit. Is like cafeteria lady put through goat first.
*snort* Sorry your coffee tastes crap, but love the description.
*snort* Sorry your coffee tastes crap, but love the description.
Uday is being kind.
America put men on the moon, gave us the internet, and invent poker...But your friend can not find a good cup of coffee if you are putting a gun to his head.
It helps to have something to look forward to. You should should start planning a vacation. Doesn't have to be big and expensive. It also helps to have small fun things every once in a while. Plan a weekend activity out of the routine a couple weeks from now. Or take an adult ed class, like pottery or something new. You just need to shake things up a little bit. You don't need to quit everything.
It helps to have something to look forward to...until it gets there. and then what? you need SOMETHING ELSE to look forward to. It NEVER ENDS.
Find your peace now. don't look for salvation in the Future. I hope you can find your way to peace within your present self. That's where you can be happy.
I know I harp on that a lot, but it really helped me, and I want others to get that same kind of help.
Read The Power of Now. Or go Buddhist. Your Life is different than your Situation. It's not you... there's nothing to quit.
Big V ... OOOOUUUCCCHHH!
You really should get that treated by proper medics. On the other hand ( ;) ), the worst place for getting MRSA infections is ... in hospitals and other health care facilities.
Hmmm.
V get that looked after NOW !!!!!!!
apparently we're sry about ur fut.
Remember crazynurse? ........
Mum is grieving.
Normal grieving I could handle.
Mum's style of grieving however is a little tricky. It includes calling Dad a stupid idiot, a deaf old bastard and basically screaming at him about everything.
He just brought the wrong packet of crisps into the living room for her and she accused him of dementia, not listening to her and not giving a shit about anything that she wanted.
She's just asked me to come off the computer. Which I will of course.
I suspect it's to complain about her evil husband to her friends.
Poor Dad.
Poor Mum as well, losing her Father.
And poor me, having to hear mine verbally attacked.
It's a genetic thing I think.
sorry to hear this SG
Tell her to take a chill pill have a drink and a nap
Tcha, last time I tried that approach I was shouted out of the house.
I didn't live here then, and had a car.
Sorry chick. This too will pass.
Big V ... OOOOUUUCCCHHH!
You really should get that treated by proper medics. On the other hand ( ;) ), the worst place for getting MRSA infections is ... in hospitals and other health care facilities.
Hmmm.
Wrong. The best place to get MRSA is in hospitals.
What kind of Doctor are you anyway?
You can't put too much water in a nuclear reactor.
I bet the Japs may disagree with you on that one...
I think I must be cursed or something. My friend Jim and I and another friend were making a cozy little T-Day dinner for 3 when Jim's phone rang. It was the Bates Motel - Nooooooooooooooo. But yes. I don't even know how they tracked me down, but they did. Carmen was really, really, really sick and needed me to come in so she could go to the hospital. Well, what could I do? I knew that Carmen must be feeling really bad if she had her husband call and ask me to come in Thanksgiving. Carmen never complains about her health. She's a trooper.
I, however, am not a trooper. I got called away before the food was finished cooking, so I never got a chance to eat - anything. I've been here since 3pm and have to stay until 10:00pm and I'm starving. I just rented a room to a Navajo lady in exchange for a necklace. This place does not exactly get over run with guests on Thanksgiving, so what the hey?
And I'll probably work here again tomorrow from 8am to 10pm. I'll NEVER get a chance to eat even a bite of that turkey that I just so happened to pay for.
Wah, wah, wah. Poor me. :mecry:
You want me to send you a turkey wing? I can drop it in overnight express in the AM. Hate for you to be so tortured.... :)
I think I must be cursed or something. My friend Jim and I and another friend were making a cozy little T-Day dinner for 3 when Jim's phone rang. It was the Bates Motel - Nooooooooooooooo. But yes. I don't even know how they tracked me down, but they did. Carmen was really, really, really sick and needed me to come in so she could go to the hospital. Well, what could I do? I knew that Carmen must be feeling really bad if she had her husband call and ask me to come in Thanksgiving. Carmen never complains about her health. She's a trooper.
I, however, am not a trooper. I got called away before the food was finished cooking, so I never got a chance to eat - anything. I've been here since 3pm and have to stay until 10:00pm and I'm starving. I just rented a room to a Navajo lady in exchange for a necklace. This place does not exactly get over run with guests on Thanksgiving, so what the hey?
And I'll probably work here again tomorrow from 8am to 10pm. I'll NEVER get a chance to eat even a bite of that turkey that I just so happened to pay for.
Wah, wah, wah. Poor me. :mecry:
Well If I was one of the other two, I'd've brought your meal over..... maybe even brought the whole party over....
We had decided to just put everything on hold and eat a late Thanksgiving tomorrow, but now that poor Carmen is going to be in the hospital for a while, we can't even do that.
Have I ever mentioned how much I hate the Bates?
it's Bates' fault Carmen is in the hospital?
The Bates' Hotel does have a reputation.
it's Bates' fault Carmen is in the hospital?
Probably. Carmen's illness has no doubt been fueled by the stress of having to deal with the impossible owner of the Bates.
But the reasons tonight that I REALLY hate the Bates and, by extension, its owner are:
Carmen should have been allowed to shut the place down until tomorrow. One little Navajo Lady trading a necklace for a room isn't going to make or break the Bates.
As usual, there will be no holiday pay or overtime pay. Its hard to feel very sunny about this place when I'm looking at working for just straight minimum wage.
It happens Sam,
When i was stationed in Iceland , the Gnny Sgt who was in charge of the club and the First Sgt got us 3 whole hogs to cook for the barracks Birthday,
we dug a Big pit ,
put up a tent ,
fired up a Big ass fire,
Preped the hogs , we had designatd trained Marine cooks ,
Oh we ALLL were haveing a Hell of a time ,
Dudes Grabben the hogs heads , Humpen them < Laughing , LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTS Of Booze flowing ,
about 10 or 11 ish the Cooks started falling out ( Wussys !!)
by 12:30 1:00 every body else had passed out or left
the smoke sorta cleared , there was this navy dude accross from me
he looked up and said " Well whats yer choice rum or wiskey ??"
Rum it was for me , he went and got a 1/2 gallon or dark rum for me and he had a 1/2 of jack for him ,
we sat up All nite drinking and tending those hogs , basting them , turning them , tending the fire , BS'ing ,
about 7:30 other folks started showing up ,
i went and flopped in my bed ,
8 am SHARP there was a knock on the door ,
Time to go stand guard , WTF !!!????
i thought the navy folks were doing that for us ,
change of plans , get yer shit in line and be down stairs ASAP !!!!
i got to stand post for like 6 hrs insted of 4
when i got back there was not a SCRAP of Hog left , not even any skin !!!!!!!!!!!:evil3::evil3::mad::mad:
I was PISSSSSEDD !!!!!
The First sgt pulled me into his office to see what was up ,
i explained ,
I had NEVER Heard a First Sgt applogise befor ( They DON'T Do that !!!)
Been there , befor
Sorry that you didnt get to eat your TDay dinner :(
Thanks, Zip. Your experience sounds like it was extremely frustrating, as well. If I'd been you, the hogs wouldn't have been the only ones with smoke coming out of their ears! ;)
I havent read the last couple of pages, so I will go back and read and comment...Im just still so fucking angry about finding someone elses dog in my back yard knocking up Lucy and beating up Jackson at 4.30am this morning!!
Im waiting on animal control to approach the owners of said dog (after I chased him out of the yard, I followed him home) and have spoken to the Vet about the "morning after" injection for Luc'....costs will come in at about $400 to fix this little problem and comes with a whole heap of potential side effects.
Seriously....grumpy as!!
Fucking useless owners.
Dux , I had to run a dog off from Our back yard with a gun today
she was sniffing around our smoker
I yelled and she ran off 2-3 times ,
4th time i stepped out the door pistol in hand 1 in the AIR , she ran
then 2-3 to heard her in the right direction and keep her running
No i didn't Shoot the dog
Sundae - so sorry for your families loss.
We went through some terrible narkiness when Dad passed away earlier this year. My brothers and sister dont talk to each other as a rule, I am the only one that got along with all of them, my sister and I are definitely on the outs now and its still a big competition about how gives Mum the most attention.
Filthy - Sorry to hear about Michelle. I think she and I spoke on the phone a couple of times? or at least we spoke through you, I remember her driving you nuts but being a lovely person.
Dux you plan on breeding Lucy? If not how much is a spay? That would be a permanent problem solver. That abort shot for canines is not the way to go...
Zip - this bastard dug under the neighbours yard and then dug into mine. He had the balls to stand up to me but I had a big lump of wood because I heard Jackson carrying on.
Yeah, Nirvana, she is for breeding and thats why we got Jackson - they are both registered for breeding.
Lucy would have already been spayed otherwise and as soon as Jackson's nuts dropped they would be gone as well (Clyde was desexed).
Its why I am so annoyed, I have kept Luc' locked up and have even taken them in the car away from our immediate area to walk them so as not to put her scent out there and we were on the home straight, she's in her week coming off.
I didnt plan to breed her for another 12 months.
Sorry about Lucy's Romeo on the sly, Ducks. But girls just wanna have fun!
I am feeling guilty about being such a selfish brat yesterday. The flight for life had to fly Carmen to the closest real hospital last night - Grand Junction - about 200 miles away.
Her condition has deteriorated and her husband is scared she'll die. His hands were shaking so bad, he couldn't even fix himself coffee last night. I had to start the coffee maker for him. He's taking off for the icy, treacherous drive from here to Grand Junction this morning.
Yesterday, I was just all caught up in myself and being pissed about having to work Thanksgiving. Meanwhile, Carmen could die! :( How selfish and thoughtless am I?
Carmen is the best boss I've ever had and the kindest person you'll ever meet. I'm getting tears in my eyes just typing this. Those doctors up there better get her fixed up.
Ducks - bloody hell. I hope you can get some compensation from the idiots who let their dog run loose. Unless he genuinely escaped from theirs in the same way he got into yours - unfortunately there is only so much you can do with a dog when they smell a bitch.
Sam - crikey don't beat yourself up about it!
You're concerned now you know the situation. Previously of course it was "all about you". You are the only person living your life and empathy is subjective. One of my colleagues was off sick today - she's been poorly all week but my first thought was for myself. I genuinely like her and we have socialised out of school. But it's natural. Away from school I wish her all the best.
Just reminded me, should text her.
Should've done so earlier today really...
Thought you were talking about Sam and me for a second there.
Sorry on behalf of the mean people.
Perhaps they are just pig-ignorant (pignorant).
Of course if you were talking about me you can go fuck yourself with a stapler :p:
Lord no. I just ventured out into the world. Its a jungle out there. Consumer madness. I'm going to take a nap.
crap Dux :( :knockdup:
Sam don't beat yourself up situations change and so do your feelings about them. Its all going in a forward motion and regret doesn't help you or Carmen. :nadkick: Now you can go on :)
This probably should go in the irritating forum, but I'm here, so it's going here.
Yesterday I went to buy some new preserve jars and paid enough money for them that I really thought it wouldn't be too much to ask for them to seal properly (starting to think maybe the pissed off thread) partly because that's what they're supposed to do anyway, and secondly, because I wanted to use them to put chopped up fruit (peaches, apricots and cherries) in them to soak in vodka and sugar till Christmas. They make a really lovely looking gift and most people enjoy opening them up and having the juices and then eating the fruit with icecream or something.
So anyway, I'm annoyed (hmmm..annoyed thread?) because they're not sealing properly. I'm also annoyed that I give things in preserve jars as gifts quite often to family a friends, and I always ask that the jar is returned (with the seal) when the contents are finished. The only person who does so is my Dad. All the rest of those people don't bother.
Now getting really fired up with my rant...
I like to make stuff to give people at Christmas. It gives me a great sense of satisfaction, and I feel it's more personal than just buying something from the shop, so it annoys me a lot when the jars aren't returned because it means that the gift for next time will cost more because I have to go and buy more.
I think I'm going to tie notes on the jars this year and see if I get a better return rate.
Bloody shitheads!
The end.
The notes will probably help. What's the deal with the jars though, bad seams? We haven't had that problem here yet... Chinese jars?
One lot I bought from a kitchen ware shop and the one that's leaking has a chip out of the lip, so I suspect that's the problem. I'll probably return that one.
The others are ones I bought from a discount store (so probably chinese) just to try them because they only cost $2 compared to the others which were about $6.
One lot I bought from a kitchen ware shop and the one that's leaking has a chip out of the lip, so I suspect that's the problem. I'll probably return that one.
The others are ones I bought from a discount store (so probably chinese) just to try them because they only cost $2 compared to the others which were about $6.
http://www.freshpreserving.com/home.aspx
Ball canning jars are about fifty cent to a dollar a piece depending on size. I think one US dollar is equal to about three Australian cents.
I think you should consider the jars as part of the present. Could you not transfer to cheaper jars just before you give them? A present "with strings" loses some of its sparkle. In this case, if you don't use it straight away there's the guilt factor that you might think they don't like it, and they have to remember to wash it and return it, it'll probably sit around on a counter collecting dust and annoying them as they wait for the next time they see you.... It's king of on a par with giving a gift that requires a subscription on the part of the recipient, or one that needs batteries without providing batteries. Or taking a meal to someone who's sick/bereaved in several dishes that must be handwashed with care. Unenvironmentally friendly as it may be, giving edible gifts in "disposable" containers is a better idea imo. :2cents:
If you do continue with the expensive jars and go with the notes, I would word it in a way that stresses the environmental factor: "If you do not plan to re-use me, please return me to Aliantha and help preserve our earth's resources" Twee tough that may sound, it makes it seem more like it's the recipient's choice rather than obligation to return the jar which, imo, makes it more likely that you'll get them back -"Aliantha will appreciate it if I give her this jar" rather than "Oh bollocks, I have to remember to wash the jar and give it back" or "Cheeky cow wanting half of the present back"......
But maybe it's a cultural thing.
The exchange rate is about even at the moment foot, so not as bad as all that. lol
What does the word 'ball' have to do with anything? I don't understand the term. Does it mean a jar where the lid vacuum seals with heat?
I think you should consider the jars as part of the present. Could you not transfer to cheaper jars just before you give them? A present "with strings" loses some of its sparkle. In this case, if you don't use it straight away there's the guilt factor that you might think they don't like it, and they have to remember to wash it and return it, it'll probably sit around on a counter collecting dust and annoying them as they wait for the next time they see you.... It's king of on a par with giving a gift that requires a subscription on the part of the recipient, or one that needs batteries without providing batteries. Or taking a meal to someone who's sick/bereaved in several dishes that must be handwashed with care. Unenvironmentally friendly as it may be, giving edible gifts in "disposable" containers is a better idea imo. :2cents:
If you do continue with the expensive jars and go with the notes, I would word it in a way that stresses the environmental factor: "If you do not plan to re-use me, please return me to Aliantha and help preserve our earth's resources" Twee tough that may sound, it makes it seem more like it's the recipient's choice rather than obligation to return the jar which, imo, makes it more likely that you'll get them back -"Aliantha will appreciate it if I give her this jar" rather than "Oh bollocks, I have to remember to wash the jar and give it back" or "Cheeky cow wanting half of the present back"......
But maybe it's a cultural thing.
It's close family and friends that I give this sort of stuff to. Often, the cost of the jar is higher than the actual cost of the ingredients. It's mainly my brother and his wife that don't return them, and I give them a lot of stuff because they're into the whole food thing and no preservative food etc.
If they were just used jam jars it'd be different, but since we rarely buy jam etc, I usually have to buy jars, and if I have to buy them every time, I might as well just buy jam cause it'd be cheaper.
Anyway, I don't think it's too much to ask for people to return the jars. Especially if they want them refilled next time round.
eta: and I think that's really the issue. If the preserves were a one off it wouldn't matter, but when I might end up giving them 20 jars throughout the year, it gets expensive to replace them.
The exchange rate is about even at the moment foot, so not as bad as all that. lol
What does the word 'ball' have to do with anything? I don't understand the term. Does it mean a jar where the lid vacuum seals with heat?
"Ball" and "Kerr" are each family names of original inventors/companies
Can you go with the transferring to cheaper jars just before giving idea? Or is there no such thing in Aus? Can you buy second hand jars?
If you transfer the contents with preserves, you risk contamination and the contents have to be refrigerated and usually consumed in a short period of time. With proper preserving, the idea is to add the preserve to the jar then put the lid on while it's still close to boiling if not still boiling.
I understand your point, and while it's a good one for non-preserved things like lollies etc, it wouldn't really work for jams and things like that.
Do you have Paddington Bear in Aus?
Only on telly for kids to watch.
...because you could put tags on them in that style.....
but if you don't that will mean nothing to you.
If you raise a smile, people are more likely to take notice, is what I'm thinking here.....
Actually, I think my brother and his wife are secretly stockpiling my preserves for when I'm dead so that they can then sell them as world famous first edition items and make millions of dollars.
I might do a black ops mission and go steal all my stuff back!
Or send Max with a sign around his neck....
Ali - hit the op shops!!! I bought heaps of beautiful old jars for 50c each and I just bought new seals.
Mum does tomato sauce every year and we know if we don't give her the bottles, we don't get any sauce!
Me.. Something bit me when I was in the garden. Single puncture wound not sore on the surface, but deep tissue pain. Addison is coming and checking on me every 10 mins because he wants to call 000, Tyler thinks I might die.
Stupid dog dug through again and let BOTH mine out, I got home at 11pm and had to go find them. I nearly ran that black fuck down, i did biff him with a brick i picked up and hurled (pure arse that i hit him)...today i laid down mesh and burried it, pegged it, filled the hole with dog shit and will lock my dogs in the shef again tonite.
I hope you can keep that mutt out from now on Ducky. I might try the op shops next time.
Ali, hook up with Ducks.
You both live in the same place after all (snicker)
Ducks with a half-brick will convince your brother and wife that perhaps returning jars is a good option. Or her in denim shorts and workboots will, anyway.
lol...I think we'll probably try and get together some time soon anyway. I'll be in Gympie a fair bit of Christmas break, so maybe some time then.
i can't sleep. it has been a miserable time for me. i spent thanksgiving alone and ended up eating a subway sandwich. friday was the 6th anniversary of tull being killed at camp hit, he was decapitated by an ied blast while serving as a gunner on the bn commander's veh. he was scheduled to go home in about 2 weeks. i'll never forget the blood in that veh and the body pieces. 4 of the 5 occupants were wounded. i still have my boots and iba carrier with their blood on it.
In so many ways i'm so alone and haunted by things in my past. sometimes i think i see tull in the corner of my eye. just a glimpse at times. for some reason it gives me comfort. if only i could sleep and forgive myself. will i ever find peace and happiness? will i ever get well or they ever figure out what is really wrong with me. I'm so f-ing tired of getting a different diagnosis and another tumor evry few months.
I'm so sorry you're alone right now Sarge. I wish I weren't so far away or I'd come over and give you a big hug and keep you company for a while. xxx
I'm so sorry you're alone right now Sarge. I wish I weren't so far away or I'd come over and give you a big hug and keep you company for a while. xxx
Ditto what Ali said, Sarge.
:hugs:
If my arms were long enough .... I do hope you can feel teh Cellar lurve, Sarge. Here's hoping you start to feel less alone real soon x
Wss^
With you in spirit mate.
Be calm, Sarge.
Tull would not want you to suffer this way.
He chose his life the same way you did.
I'm sorry you're alone, but you won't be for long.
You have wonderful children, by birth and by choice.
Cyber hugs until you are with them again.
And sorry for all the shit you have to go through with your health.
All the Cellar ladies would try to massage you better if they could.
Although there might be a longer list for some parts than others!
Hang in there Sarge. Remember the good things in your life. You are a good man, we can all see that.
The exchange rate is about even at the moment foot, so not as bad as all that. lol
What does the word 'ball' have to do with anything? I don't understand the term. Does it mean a jar where the lid vacuum seals with heat?
Ball and Kerr are the names of two of the most popular mason (canning) jar manufacturers in the US. They both have been bought up by a parent company.
I know what you mean about getting the jars back. Between breakage, misappropriation and non-returns, I drop about 40-50 bucks a year on jars. It hurts when you do it all at once, but you don't notice it 50 cents at a time.
"A penny for a spool of thread, a penny for the needle, that's the way the money goes, POP goes the weasel..."
Sarge,
I'm sorry to hear about your pain and wish I could offer you something to lessen it or make it more bearable.
You are in my thoughts.
Sorry for whining again. I'm making the switch from Celexa to Prozac and it is a tough transition. BTW, I do have enough sense to realize the glimpses I see of Tull are not real. I'm not that far gone yet. Anyway, here's a link to Tull's info
http://militarytimes.com/valor/army-spc-gregory-l-tull/1380543You have my deepest sympathies, Sarge. My Dad was career Army - fought in WWII, Korea, and two tours in Vietnam. After Vietnam, he'd get the worst nightmares - wake up my Mom and me with his screams. The VA sucked back then just like it does now. This country should be ashamed at the low quality of care it bestows upon our vets. Hang in there. We're all sending you good thoughts.
Sarge, sorry bro! keep your chin up and remember the good times!
Thinking of you and hoping things get better. Hang in there.
"A penny for a spool of thread, a penny for the needle, that's the way the money goes, POP goes the weasel..."
Up and down the City Road, in and out of The Eagle, that's the way the money goes, POP goes the weasel...
The news about Carmen remains bleak. It sounds as though she suffering from some form of dementia/hallucinations. Her husband called and said that she is fighting everyone, pulling out her IV, refusing to have any tests done, and asking for money (?). So nothing is being done in regard to diagnosing and treating her which I don't understand. But its hard to get good info out of hubby anyway. He seems to understand about half of what's he told in the best of times.
Meanwhile, my cow orker while expressing concern for Carmen, is at the same time in the midst of staging a coup. Cow orker claims Carmen was losing it before she got sick and yelled at cow orker alot for no reason. Frankly, I have lost my temper with cow orker more than once and if Carmen did too, she probably had good reason. Whenever I have worked with Carmen, she was always pleasant to me and if she did get irritated at something I did, it was usually because I had messed up on something.
Cow orker has moved into the motel in Carmen's absence and claims that if Carmen comes back, cow orker will lock her in the back bedroom. :eyebrow: Cow orker also talked the owner who is out of town, into giving her the lion's share of the extra hours, meaning extra pay. She informed me of this this morning, and I'm so mad I could spit.
Between having cow orker suddenly take it upon herself to become the new manager/tyrant and my concern for Carmen, I am very upset today - apparently along with several other people here. What is this? A bad conjunction of the planets or what? :(
Cow orker also talked the owner who is out of town, into giving her the lion's share of the extra hours, meaning extra pay. She informed me of this this morning, and I'm so mad I could spit.
It's okay, you weren't so keen on having to cover all those extra shifts for Carmen anyway, right? Even if the other coworker is officially promoted to manager in her place, you've gotta figure it's not going to come with a raise. You don't want to be "moving up" the career ladder in a place like that anyway, you want to be looking for ways to get out of there as soon as you can.
You're right, Clod. I guess more than anything I am upset about having cow orker as my new manager, since cow orker is far from being my "nbff". Carmen was the one bright spot on that job and if she's gone...
I came very close to quitting on the spot this morning, but I need the money. And who knows? Maybe Carmen will come back and lock cow orker in the back room!
What kind of idiot thinks it's a good idea to use live fish in tiny vases as table decorations at a swim banquet? :(
I know, I know, they're just feeder goldfish, but we -and 45 teenage girls, sat there and watched them expire whilst celebrating swimming achievements. :(
Don't be silly, dead fish can't taste anything.
Minifobette woke up mean this morning, partly my fault because I forgot one of her meds last night and partly because it's overcast and raining and that fucks with her head somehow, either because there are pressure changes giving her a headache or she just doesn't like the sky being different, who the fuck knows. Couldn't get her morning routine done in the standard hour-and-fifteen-minutes, so she missed the bus, thus I got to park a block and a half away and walk her in the pouring rain, meanwhile she's still whining about the fact that she's not carrying both umbrellas, and she doesn't like me wearing my jacket, and then she got mad that I lifted her over the giant puddle so instead she went back and dropped to her knees in it, then she was pissed because she was all wet, and then the stupid crossing guard nagged me about jaywalking instead of going all the way down to use the crosswalk, and helpfully suggested that I leave younger siblings at home when taking my children to school, because apparently my other children got the invisible gene from their dad's side, and the visible one wears this giant school backpack for fun, didn't you know? Oh and also, Minifob woke up blowing green snot everywhere, so his blood test next week is probably going to show that his WBC count has not recovered into normal ranges yet. And tomorrow I have to attend a PPCD Christmas party, then a Kindergarten Christmas party, then a therapy clinic Christmas party, all of which require me to make single servings of various holiday-themed snacks so my kids will have something to consume like the other kids, and real Christmas is coming and we have to drive 7 hours to see the in-laws and pack all the necessary food for the 3-day trip and my stupid car needs $2000 in repairs and yesterday I tore a hole in the knee of my last pair of jeans.
Okay, I think I'm done now.
Wow ! Some Moms are supreme beings.
Wow ! Some Moms are supreme beings.
I agree.
damn Clod !!
Ya still got any hair left ???
Stay strong
Oh man, and today even got worse later on. Got Minifobette's allergy panel back from the lab. We had tested for every single food she eats (only about a dozen,) plus the full regional inhalant panel (basically every tree that grows in Texas,) trying to figure out what the hell is giving her the constant allergy symptoms no matter how much Zyrtec and Alavert and Singulair we give her.
Anyway, results are in, and it turns out she is indeed highly allergic to just one thing: butternut squash. Which, you know, she only eats 4 times a day. It's the main ingredient in a "juice" puree I make for her that both provides necessary nutrient content as well as delivers several medicines. So over the next few days we have to gradually switch her over to a new blend using zucchini as the main base and hope she accepts the shift in flavor. That's convenient. :rolleyes: At least we have an answer, even if it's not the answer we wanted.
Um Fob, you made my week look not so bad and it was kind of sucking......
Wow ! Some Moms are supreme beings.
The rest of them are just useless drudges getting by on minimum effort, selling their kids' food coupons to feed their crack habit....
My first actual "shift" at work was good, then really really crap when I picked up my phone and had a missed call from my Mum (babysitting) 3 hours earlier, the stupid voice to text gave me this message "Edita and got a cap to clean his eye. Give us a call"
wtf? call Mum and Addison had stacked off the bed and crack his head open on the bedside table. She thought it might need stitches.
Get home and there is a 2 inch split between his eyebrows, which is still bleeding and gross.
Off to ER at 10pm at nite, home again at 1am with the gaping hole glued together.
sign the papers so she can take them to the hospital in an emergency ,
Boys will be Boys ,
And dont forget those feral Roos !!!
Shes all set and could have taken him Zip, she didnt a good job of patching him up until I got home.
Poor kid! Summer holidays and he cant get his face wet for 10 days....although its raining, and he has a cold, he still wants to play in the rain or swim.
i can dig it , i had a broken arm one summer , couldnt swim and play in the sprinkler
i can dig it , i had a broken arm one summer , couldnt swim and play in the sprinkler
And NOW look at you!
How's the shoulder?
I am feeling calmer and I read Clodfobble's storm of shite up there so now I feel a bit better and can stitch my tale of woe (for it is an Eyore's tale) to the bottom here.
Son number 2 is going to move into his aunt's house to dog-sit for a week and then he will move into his own abode.
I have been literally homicidal and suicidal and even a tad arsonist-y.
It has been a weekus horribalis.
whew. I feel I can finally breathe after two weeks.
How's the shoulder?
funny thing is ,,, its the same arm
and the shoulder is Barometric
Oh man, and today even got worse later on. Got Minifobette's allergy panel back from the lab. We had tested for every single food she eats (only about a dozen,) plus the full regional inhalant panel (basically every tree that grows in Texas,) trying to figure out what the hell is giving her the constant allergy symptoms no matter how much Zyrtec and Alavert and Singulair we give her.
Anyway, results are in, and it turns out she is indeed highly allergic to just one thing: butternut squash. Which, you know, she only eats 4 times a day. It's the main ingredient in a "juice" puree I make for her that both provides necessary nutrient content as well as delivers several medicines. So over the next few days we have to gradually switch her over to a new blend using zucchini as the main base and hope she accepts the shift in flavor. That's convenient. :rolleyes: At least we have an answer, even if it's not the answer we wanted.
I was gonna suggest that you start incorporating seasoning with a pronounced flavor (like pumpkin pie spices) then it occurred to me that those are probably "off list."
If not, then the flavor of the spices will overwhelm any change in squashiness.
Also, do you bake or boil the squash? Caramelization adds a lot to the flavor profile and esp. with butternut which has a lot of sugar. If you do, be sure to caramelize the zucchini and add some sort of sugar (a tiny amount) just to give the zucchini a chance to develop those Maillard reaction flavors.
Or not. Probably not.
How's the shoulder?
funny thing is ,,, its the same arm
and the shoulder is Barometric
:weather:
I'm glad you're feeling better Bri. Missed you.
I know how it is having an unwanted presence in your home, and the horrible stress it causes.
Cheer up girl! You're loved. :)
I'm glad you're feeling better Bri. Missed you.
I know how it was having an unwanted presence in my home, and the horrible mess it caused.
Cheer up girl! You're loved. :)
I know how it WAS, having an unwanted presence in your home, and I know the stress it causes. How it clouds everything. How you feel sick to your stomach either knowing they're there, or wondering when they will be there and how they will act. I know the resignation one feels when one decides to just stay in one's room, to just avoid it all. I know the relief when it's finally over. I know the almost post-traumatic stress as you hear a car door and think they're still coming back. I know how it feels to have your custom jewelry stolen out from under you. I know how it feels to feel like an intruder in your own home. I know how it feels to try to hide food and beverages and all the things you pay for because otherwise you'll never get any of it. I know what it's like to be treated like a piece of shit by the pseudo-intruder in your home. I know what it's like to hear about smack talk from said intruder around town when all you've done is try to help the best you can. I know...
Never mind what I know. I'm just relieved for you, dear.
:)
Also, do you bake or boil the squash? Caramelization adds a lot to the flavor profile and esp. with butternut which has a lot of sugar. If you do, be sure to caramelize the zucchini and add some sort of sugar (a tiny amount) just to give the zucchini a chance to develop those Maillard reaction flavors.
I just microwave it a bit before blending, because it makes it puree smoother and also gets it out of its bulk frozen state.
Good news is, she totally took it like a champ. Didn't even notice the half-and-half blend, and when I gave her a blend fully substituted with zucchini she stared at it in bewilderment for a moment, then went back to drinking. So now I'm just excited to see what sort of allergy relief she'll finally get to see in the next few days.
Ducks, you should post a picture of the boy's gash. Are you already out from school for the holiday break? If it heals too much before he sees his friends again, maybe he'll want to take the picture to show them so he gets full badass credit. :)
So glad to hear the situation's improving, Bri. Christmas miracles all around!
I know how it WAS, having an unwanted presence in your home, and I know the stress it causes. How it clouds everything. How you feel sick to your stomach either knowing they're there, or wondering when they will be there and how they will act. I know the resignation one feels when one decides to just stay in one's room, to just avoid it all. I know the relief when it's finally over. I know the almost post-traumatic stress as you hear a car door and think they're still coming back. I know how it feels to have your custom jewelry stolen out from under you. I know how it feels to feel like an intruder in your own home. I know how it feels to try to hide food and beverages and all the things you pay for because otherwise you'll never get any of it.
That echoes some of how I felt sharing a house.
The other girls thought it was so funny that I hid away in my room.
Ha ha ha.
Bitches.
Oh, and wondering if they would be really drunk when they came home and use their 100 pound weight advantage added to gender advantage to beat the shit out of me in my own home.
Hence the graves in the basement
Okay. That's rough.
All I had to wonder about was whether they would come home coked-up and clop upstairs in their heels sounding like Ragnarok, then proceed to have noisy sex (aka fake orgasms) at 04.00 when I had to leave for work at 07.30.
I've met people who have tried to casually use earplugs and given up.
I was committed. I broke through the oddness of being surrounded by sounds of my own body and disconnected from the world.
Even on my own I feel safer sleeping in them now.
You remember the Homeless Guy?
It got really bad before he finally left. He didn't hit me, but he got in my face a few times (again, in my own house) and was a real asshole and I was so miserable I didn't know what to do. How mean of me, to let him live there after his house burnt down, rent-free.
So after I finally got up enough guts to contact my attorney (though HG never hit me, he scared the crap out of me, very unstable character there at the end) to start eviction proceedings he left the state with the wife of the guy who ran the bar he hung out in. He got his sugar mama. She's his problem now, thank gawd.
And I've not been able to find all my jewelry (a lot of expensive custom pieces from my marriage...ex's best friend a very artistic jeweler) but I could have hidden it from HIM and forgot where I hid it, but no luck so far.
Sorry, don't know why this poured out now, after all this time. I forget sometimes how much that affected me.
...
All I had to wonder about was whether they would come home coked-up and clop upstairs in their heels sounding like Ragnarok, then proceed to have noisy sex (aka fake orgasms) at 04.00 when I had to leave for work at 07.30.
This is your parents you're talking about?
Infi, I found a lot of my issues with my Mum come out on here - and they just come out when and where they do.
I always thought you should kick the bastard in the balls, but I had no idea of the dynamic of your relationship. Thank FSM he absconded. POS.
Nah, HLJ - Dad would like to but Mum isn't interested.
She was, once. Well, three times by the evidence!
And she asked me to buy her a vibrator.
I did.
Fast-forward eight years and I hear her laughing on the phone that she once asked me to buy her one but I got one so fancy she was scared to use it.
It was a Rabbit.
I don't know whether it was her spinning a story for a friend, or the truth. Smacks of the truth to me.
Sad. It came with fucking instructions! [deliberate]
:)
Thanks Sundae. That made me grin.
Caught her lying again today.
No wonder I grew up with a casual regard for the truth.
She didn't realise I heard her on the phone last night, cancelling plans with the daughter of a friend because apparently Dad had such a heavy cold. I thought it odd at the time - he sounded fine to me.
Then this morning she said that they weren't going out today because N had cancelled.
Adding, "You know what she's like!" for verisimilitude.
Hmmmm.
ETA - and far more important.
Diz is all wheezy and huffy again and it terrifies me.
Something he's eaten has gone down or up the wrong way.
This happened a couple of months ago, but I had to go to school so wasn't around to worry about it.
It can only be beebles, so I am assuming it will break down and not be a problem - unlike when he had the chunk of gristle stuck; that was obstructing his airflow, as opposed to just making him cough and sneeze.
Still hate it though - there is nothing I can do :(
Also, went down to the Spar to the cashpoint - it was stuck on "Please remove your card".
I didn't dare force my card in there right before Glasgow!
So I went inside to queue up at the counter behind all the people sending Christmas parcels.
10 minutes later (at least quicker than the main Post Office in town) I walk out past the cashpoint to see it is on the correct Welcome screen. D'oh.
And the traffic was really heavy on the Elmhurst Road, so I walked up on the unsunny side, aiming to cross at the top.
I didn't even see the ptach of ice I slipped on.
Whoosh, my front foot just shot out and I was down on my bum before I knew what was happening.
It was surprisingly painless, although I barked my hand a little.
A young Asian woman with her toddler son rushed to my rescue. She was approx 5'4" and about a third of my weight. Bless her - I think I nearly broke her getting up.
So there you go.
Nothing like Clod's saga, but enough to make me grumpy and sad.
Diz coughed it up. Or down.
Phew. He is breathing quite normally as of about 2 minutes ago.
In fact he is shouting his head off because he can see Mia through the (glass) back door.
A parcel I sent to the States seems to have gone missing. :(
I know that feeling Limes!
I can't count the number of times it's happened to me.
I think everything turned up eventually (the longest wait was actually my fault - it was sent overland because I messed up on the postage).
Does your recipient check their postbox often?
Not every Dwellar gets post through their door.
Oh - I sent some money to Jim (for UT's car) and as far as I know it NEVER arrived.
That was an obvious case of theft, either here or there :(
Yes, recipient is on the look-out for it. I remember now the box was (used) packaging from some firm with a name awfully like "communism" ... I joked at the time that it might cause a problem, and perhaps it has :(
I just got a virus on my work computer from a link posted on the Cellar. I was going to try to get caught up on work this weekend, but I've had to shut that computer down. I'll take it to IS on Monday and they'll probably lock me out of the Cellar.
I just got a virus on my work computer from a link posted on the Cellar. I was going to try to get caught up on work this weekend, but I've had to shut that computer down. I'll take it to IS on Monday and they'll probably lock me out of the Cellar.
oh no!!!!!!
that completely bytes!
Can you mark it so glatt co. can delete the bad link?
I think it was in Humor ... I put a
note in the post under the bad post.
Dang, that sucks, HLJ. But surely they will block kuriositas.com, not the cellar? I'm not sure how they would even know that you got to the virusy link from here.
We have gotten viruses on two separate occasions from ads loaded on cracked.com, so I won't open their articles anymore, even though they are often quite funny.
Maybe I'll clear out my browsing history and cache before I bring it to them.
It's a little like closing the barn door after the cows got out, but I've deleted those links.
Our Health insurance is going UP $85[SIZE="4"] PER[/SIZE] [SIZE="6"]PAY[/SIZE][SIZE="7"]!!!![/SIZE]
it was already ridiculous. I'll be paying $257 per pay. Yes... I'm paid weekly.
I might quit this job over this.
Just tell them you don't need no stinkin' insurance.
Lewis: [
to Bobby] Insurance? Shit! I never been insured in my life! I don't believe in insurance. There's no risk.
Jebus, man. That sucks awful! :(
So it's going up $4,420?!
That's a very steep increase. Did everyone in the dealership besides you just turn 65 or something?
Does it at least also cover your kids?
That's just...huge, to me.
wtf are people supposed to do? Work to live, live to work.
You can get an independent, fully self-paid, family insurance policy for less than that. Does the dealership even contribute anything? Will they let you opt out?
they pay half of the plan that has $5000 deductibles. if you opt for actual coverage, they still pay half of the cheapest plan amount. so they contribute $154 per pay. ( and I'm skeptical about the veracity of that )
Yes, shaw... this is the family plan covers my kids and jinx (we're still married)
When the divorce becomes final she's off... but the court may require me to pay her cobra. that would be even worse.
I think I'll go boil my bottom.
So it's going up $4,420?!
That's a very steep increase. Did everyone in the dealership besides you just turn 65 or something?
2 people got cancer, and somebody's kid has serious problems.
communism.
FTR - I do NOT work with Jim.
I has to buy my own when I lost my job. I've been paying $300 a month just for myself. Its almost 1/4 of my "income" right now.
My karaoke machine's not working. Grrrr. And it's Christmas karaoke night for my kids. >.<
2 people got cancer, and somebody's kid has serious problems.
communism.
The point of insurance is to spread the risk around so that local anomalies like this don't affect your premium. Sounds like your pool is way too small.
This isn't communism. It's the mongrel bastard offspring of a drunken one-night stand between dysfunctional corporocapitalism and half-arsed socialism.
The point of insurance is to spread the risk around so that local anomalies like this don't affect your premium. Sounds like your pool is way too small.
This isn't communism. It's the mongrel bastard offspring of a drunken one-night stand between dysfunctional corporocapitalism and half-arsed socialism.
This. Can you leave this scheme and join Clod's (or an independent one somewhere with a bigger pool)?
or Insurance, for short.
On the one hand, yeah. On the other, not if the changes to only 3 people's health have affected Jim's premium to this extent [/insurance nerd]
Mum has been hinting about changes in Dad's health for a while.
I've deliberately not pressed her as she's introduced them with downturned mouth and shaking head and "There's a lot you don't know."
It's not that I don't care - I do, enormously.
But I know she'll tell me at some point and I don't want to play games about it.
Yesterday, as we were out enjoying our family meal, Dad went to the toilet and Mum finally came out with the fact that he has been having prostate trouble. Serious operation style trouble. He has an appointment in the New Year.
Well, it's finally out.
At least I know.
His weight loss has been apparent for a while, so it could be worse.
Happy Christmas.
The kitty snuff video.
I can't get that picture out of my mind, and I can visualize the cat in motion, though I didn't watch it.
I lost two cats in 2011. Cats I had for 17 and 16 years. I have no cats now. I cannot stand to see animals suffer. More so, even, when you imagine that the animal is in emotional distress. Maybe that's anthopomorphizing, but I don't think so.
And now all I can think about is that damn picture, posted for what purpose I do not know. Maybe it's a joke. Maybe the dead cat is made of rubber. I won't know. I won't watch it. But it's bummed my day out completely.
We talk about losing our pets. We know how much it hurts, even after a lot of time has passed. This posting was, at best, insensitive. At worst, cruel.
So I didn't put this in the thread because frankly I don't like to open it and look at that picture, and I don't want to draw any more attention to it.
You'll forgive me if it is a joke video. All I can imagine is what it says it is.
And it's heartbreaking.
That is all.
I think it's just a vid that Classic saw on facebook that he'd found very sad.
I know what you mean though. I keep seeing a flash of it. Horrible. Might be worth sticking a warning in the title, just so people know it's not a joke thread. I realise the title doesn't sound very jokey, but you never can tell with internet stuff.
I didn't watch it either. But here's how to think about it, IMO.
We imagine that our pets have human-level consciousness and emotion, and they just don't. Whatever the living cat is "thinking" in that video, s/he is not as horrified or worried as we would be, if we were in that situation.
Pearl lived with Bean for 5 years. Three days after Bean died, I had a moment and I asked Pearl, "Where's Bean?" -- and heartbreakingly, she looked at the door where he would be returning, if he could.
But then I tried it again three days after that, and she had no reaction at all. If she had any level of self-awareness, she must have thought, "New pack, new situation, this is what we have now, And I'm perfectly OK with that, because I have very little long-term memory, so I live in the 'now'."
It is weird to think of it because we humanize them; but if we die in a household with our cats/dogs, and they have no other food source, after a few days they will start to eat us.
Maybe so. But that looked like a cat in deep distress at that moment however cats experience distress.
My old cat did that to me one time when I was breathing funny. I think it's mostly instinct.
I didn't watch the video either, because I'm not supposed to from work. I'd point out that often, our imagination is worse that reality. You may find that if you watch the video a few times, you'll be desensitized to it and it won't bug you as much. Easy for me to say, since I haven't seen the video, but it's quite likely. When I see video of the planes hitting the WTC now, I feel pretty much nothing. I was pretty overwhelmed when I saw it the first time.
When I was in my teens we had two westies. They were four years apart. When Wellington started to become infirm, losing his sight and hearing, Dudley became his guide. He'd circle him and nudge him in the right direction if he was about to walk into something, or if he was drifting too far in the wrong direction. Wasn't even a herding breed.
When Wellington died, Dudley pined for a long time. Initially for almost the entire time. Went off his food, cried and whined, howled, went to all of Wellington's spots and lay down in them. After a couple of days he began to settle down a litte, but he still had times when he was really unsettled and seemed to be looking for Wellington. At particular times when he would have usually expected Wellington to be by him, like feeding time, and walking time. And bedtime too. He still whined sometimes at bedtime, even a few weeks later.
I understand that about animals. I suppose we could get into an argument about what animals 'feel' but I know that I have different feelings on the subject than some. It's much too sensitive a subject to broach with my friends who feel otherwise, for me.
But I should desensitize myself? No, thank you.
Some people should 'sensitize' themselves.
I'd hate to think if it were a dog video.
classic, sorry, really. I know you didn't mean it in a bad way.
I'm in a bad place, and that was just too much.
I watched it about 2/3 of the way.
the cat seemed to be kneading the dead one like they do when they nurse... but then, as he continued to do it, then checked for breath.. i wondered if the cat were performing cpr instinctively. he's pushing and pushing on the spot just behind the forward arm, where the heart lies on a quadrupedal animal. and he's sitting on him the whole time, which I also found odd.
I think he was trying to keep him warm as well.
But even we mighty humans didn't know about CPR until the 1900s, didn't even know about the nature of the heart and bloodflow until when, the 1600s? If anything, it might have been a kind of instinctive first aid.
It was yesterday....but when I was at work, I caught a familiar figure and motion out the corner of my eye....an old man hunched over leaning on his shopping trolley, arms crossed over it, with a great big head of grey thick hair and a solid figure. I swung around with a big grin to greet my Dad, to see that it wasnt my Dad (of course) but just another older man.
Im sure he wondered why the smiley girl's demeanor changed so quickly.
I miss my Dad
Aww girl. Maybe you were supposed to see that to rekindle some special (happy) memories. There are angels among us
It's awful when your brain is overtaken by your emotions and you just totally forget for a second that someone is gone. It's happened to me before too, so I know how gut wrenching it is.
Sorry mate. :(
Thanks guys :)
Because I am so much younger than my siblings and stayed close to my parents, I think its hit me a lot harder than them and my Mum was just relieved when he passed - so none of them can understand why I still spontaneously burst into tears.
Like down fishing with the kids, I'll tear up because he would be so proud of the dedicated Fisherman Tyler is becoming and I am sad he's not here to enjoy this part of their lives.
I havent recovered from the shock of Christmas without him I think...this was my undoing on Christmas morning
[YOUTUBE]66PM-xyXGY8[/YOUTUBE]
I'm not even playing that song. I know it'll floor me.
Oh, Ducks, honey. I know what that's like. That moment of false recognition. I still get it sometimes. Though less often now. From time to time I'll see Dad. Silly because he never lived around my town. Yet I sometimes see him shopping there.
And from time to time, I'll feel a rush of pride over some academic achievement or other, or a landmark passed, or even just a really clever idea for a poem. And for just a second I'm rehearsing the phonecall to tell him.
*hugs*
It does get easier. Takes time, but it does. Still knocks me a little off kilter sometimes, but the gutwrenching body blow that such things used to bring has softened a great deal.
I don't know what it's like, I can't even imagine. I feel for you, though, Ducks. I can't really add to anything already said but I hope your happy memories get you through.
:comfort:
My Mum features an awful lot in my dreams. I'm talking 2 or 3 times a week at least I have a memorable dream that she's in. The one i had this morning was incredibly vivid, and Mum wasn't even actually visible, but I was talking to her on the phone. Aden was only little and I was at my friend Clem's place and he was cooking dinner but it was late, so I called Mum to say I'd be home in a couple of hours. The funny part was, it was only me and Aden. No Mav or Max or Dazza.
It was a nice dream all the same though. There were other parts to it too, but they were kinda weird. Something to do with an agricultural show and animals getting loose and all sorts of weird stuff.
It was yesterday....but when I was at work, I caught a familiar figure and motion out the corner of my eye....an old man hunched over leaning on his shopping trolley, arms crossed over it, with a great big head of grey thick hair and a solid figure. I swung around with a big grin to greet my Dad, to see that it wasnt my Dad (of course) but just another older man.
Im sure he wondered why the smiley girl's demeanor changed so quickly.
I miss my Dad
outch.
is that receant? for the first few years after my father died that used to happen to me a lot, sometimes when the resamblance was a real stretch of imagination in a 2nd look...
it really does get better. obviously different people might take it differently, but for me and hopefully for you, at some point "he'd be so proud, i wish he could be here" moments become just "he'd be so proud" moments, and you sort of get a little bite of that old satisfaction you would have had in making your him proud. it doesn't make much sense, but it works.
After an unprecedented streak of pleasant sunny days in PDX, we had a storm
come through with sleet and rain and snow and our house shook.
I knew something was wrong and set about looking for the cause.
It took a while, but I finally found what had happened.
My wife of so many years had done the unthinkable...:eek:
She had put
Grampa's coffee cup thru the dishwasher !
Not only that, she admitted to actually hand-washing the cup to get rid of it's last bits of patina.
Now, it's just a plain glass cup, an ordinary, run-of-the-mill, crystal clear, cup.
Gone are the traces of fragrance and tastes built up over the years of loyalty and pleasure.
Fading now are the memories of cups, nay, pots of coffee of days gone by.
I could buy another cup. I could start over with this old, now plain, non-descript THING.
But the heart is gone. It would not be the same. What shall I do ? :mecry:
Oh, the humanity ... My God, think of the children.
.
I'm having a huge deja vu thing. Has this been posted before?
It only feels like it has been posted before.
A déjà vu is usually a glitch in the Matrix. It happens when they change something.
I saw Grandad's gate open the other morning.
Wondered if Dad had parked in there, but remembered walking past his car in the Close.
It took a few seconds (quite a lot in brain time) to scroll through - no he's in the hospital, no he's in the home, oh no, no, actually he's dead and that isn't Grandad's gate any more, even if it still the the number 3 my Dad put on it, and the hook and eye fastening to keep the gate open when you reverse in, and the plants we planted as a family in the garden (including a few hardy Australian ones in honour of Uncle Jim.
Losing a Grandad isn't like losing your Dad0, but even that can sneak up unexpectedly.
I dream about my Nan occasionally.
She's usually being quite nice.
I suppose she lives in the part of my brain that's pre-twelve, because I did love her back then.
Even in the dreams I pause and think, "Hang on, you're dead aren't you?"
I expect Grandad to make an appearance soon. And I think it will be pleasant.
I'm having a huge deja vu thing. Has this been posted before?
Yeh
he posted a pic about his coffee cup which was only rinsed - never washed.
Quite a kick in the pants, that.
... I could buy another cup. I could start over with this old, now plain, non-descript THING.
But the heart is gone. It would not be the same. What shall I do ? :mecry:
Every cloud has a silver lining. Think of it as one less thing she can point to if she ever tries to have you committed. :p:
You may be able to restore the coffee cup's aura if you can get someone special to drink from it, someone so out of the ordinary for you that you wouldn't want to wash it afterwards (especially if lip prints are evident and you have a pic of the person drinking from it). The cup may have to travel to and from that person; but, perhaps some good Samaritan will volunteer to accept it as a noble cause. :)
Good luck.
I wish my little wolf was here with me. I miss him so very much.
The smell of him has faded completely now from his furlined raincoat.
He's still there, Dana. Believe me, in your every memory, your every pang of loss and, with time, your every chuckle at all your happy times. Where you are, he is.
Sent from my iPod touch using Tapatalk
I know. I just really miss the smell of him. And being able to kiss his ridiculous brown nose:p
But it might make your new puppy nervous. :cool:
Crap. Crap. Crap. I inadvertently bought some juice that contained artificial sweetener.
Artificial sweeteners give me abdominal pain, cramps, and diarrhea.
Crap.
Crap. Crap. Crap. I inadvertently bought some juice that contained artificial sweetener.
Artificial sweeteners give me abdominal pain, cramps, and diarrhea-crap.
FTFY
[SIZE="1"](bummer, by the way)[/SIZE]
No, really, I'm sorry.
Deleted.
Too specific.
Moaning about school and the conflicts on my time and what I should be achieving.
I do still love it. Just some bits more than others.
No, really, I'm sorry.
Thanks Limey. That'll teach me to be more careful reading the labels.
Thank *you*, Pete, for knowing that I really am sorry. Hugs.
I think I have to finally face the truth. What do you do when a person seems to be really good for you, but then you overhear a conversation elsewhere that floors you. A conversation that makes you feel small. A conversation that makes you sick to your stomach?
When you've invested so much time, thinking one day it would all come together. When they are getting nothing from you why would they play you?
Is it possible that this conversation was for show? Does it matter? The opinions expressed were harsh, painful to hear, nothing like you thought you'd hear, nothing that you'd ever want in a person.
A fool. A fool I was, a fool I am, a fool I shall remain. Then I'll die alone.
Just remember that when someone is two faced, it reflects poorly on them, not on you.
Also, if you trust someone, and they betray you, that doesn't make you a fool.
It hurts now Anon, but at least it's an ending.
Shithead (of whichever gender) is a shithead and you won't hang on hoping, wasting any more time.
You will heal one day.
You can't even help that.
Sorry to hear it's crummy right now though.
Betrayal is harder to bear than any harsh words from a known enemy. I've felt it, and I truly wished I had remained ignorant of the supposed friend's dislike of me. Why wouldn't a person just quietly leave, if that is how they felt? I still don't know.
But I know this. We may not be there in person, but you can't die alone if you have us. There are people here who love you and you are not alone.
On the other hand. My freshman year roommate's girlfriend was overheard to say, at their two-month mark, "yeah he's just another notch on my bedpost."
7 years later, they were married at the school's chapel, and it's 25 years this year.
Thank you.
I might be overreacting. I don't know. I never know when it's time to throw in the towel. I don't seem to have any grasp whatsoever on what a relationship is supposed to be. I've been so pushed around, stepped on, disregarded. I shield myself then when I peek over the shield and start to lower it I get shot in the face. Maybe I'm just scared. Maybe I have no faith. Maybe I'm right and should follow my gut. When do you know, how do you know? I feel like I already took the leap of faith but i want to slide back under the door, because as these things go, it doesn't seem to be moving as I want it to. But if I'm wrong, what have I thrown away? Is it really possible that the past relationships could do this much damage, so much so that you have no idea on earth if you're right or wrong, and don't know if you want to risk it, even with the chance that it really is true and good?
I can push the world away, but when I try to stop pushing I get hurt. So why wouldn't I keep pushing it all away? My track record is crap. History of same-sex friendships and opposite-sex relationships where I am taken advantage of, and used. I can't trust myself.
I don't know. On the one hand, I think that you shouldn't push the world away, because that sounds exhausting and lonely, and no way to live your life. But on the other hand if a cold hard look at your past relationships shows that you are a poor judge of character, then I can understand your lack of confidence there. And I'd hate to tell you to go running with open arms into another bad relationship.
Is there a middle path where you can just take it slow and keep an open mind and heart?
I think I've been on the middle path, a couple of years now, taking it slow and trying to keep an open mind and heart...yet I am acutely aware of anything that seems a sign of 'same old...' Things are at once sluggish and amplified.
Before that, between 'that' and 'that', was a very exhausting and lonely time.
Maybe I need to step back and keep the open mind and heart. Sometimes that's exhausting too.
Thank you.
I was with a man once who (I found out later) used to say we were 'just friends', particularly when he was trying to chat up another woman. Later, he would say the same about his current g/f when I questioned him about his relationship, but when I asked her, she'd say they were in love and blah blah blah.
He's continued to do the same thing to his own detriment for the last 20 years. I don't think he's likely to stop.
People who don't value what they have, probably should take a good look at themselves, and you anon, should certainly not think it has anything to do with you.
Also i'd point out that Liz Hurley was quoted as saying Shane Warne was 'just a bit of rough' when they were first caught by the paparazzi, but now they're engaged and all that, so sometimes there is a reason for saying negative things (although few and far between).
Have you confronted your partner about what you heard? That'd be a great place to start with sorting this out if you haven't already.
Thanks again, everyone.
I want to say that it wasn't anything directed at me. It was a general difference in philosophies that for my own personal reasons struck me as awful.
I need to look at the big picture. Maybe one day I will talk about it. It will be a difficult conversation to have.
I don't need to make any rash decisions.
Thanx..
Sounds like you have a better handle on the situation now Anon. Hope it works out. *hugs*
Thank *you*, Pete, for knowing that I really am sorry. Hugs.
**Really?**
"You're sorry"? Cause, ew.
A friend who has been fighting colon cancer for the last few years is just about at the end of her journey. She'll be leaving behind her two boys, ages 9 and 12. Friends with, and same age as our kids. I've known this is coming for a while, but it still sucks.
Fuck cancer.
I'm very sorry for you all glatt. It must be so hard for her kids. They're going to need you all so much. xx
sorry, glatt, cancer is the nastiest, cruelest thing.
Thanks Limey. That'll teach me to be more careful reading the labels.
There must have been some significant change in labelling laws. You used to be able to count on the artificial sweetener announcement on the front of the label, now it's not only on the back, but buried so far down in the ingredients list that you can't find it, or can't figure out what's what in the list of awful chemicals. I have a similar sensitivity to Nutrasweet/Aspertame, Saccharhin, and Acesulfame K. I can tolerate Splenda/Sucralose and Stevia, but I think they taste funky. I've done the same thing and regretted it for several hours.
I'm so sorry, glatt. My dad lost his mother to colon cancer when he was 12. Definitely changed his outlook on life. It breaks my heart to think of those two boys.
...He also lost his older brother to colon cancer some 25 years later. This one's highly heritable, I hope the kids remember to start getting regular colonoscopies at 30 so their own kids don't risk going through the same thing.
My dad lost his mother to colon cancer when he was 12. Definitely changed his outlook on life. It breaks my heart to think of those two boys.
That's been the saddest part of all this. These two boys have changed over the last couple years from being typical silly boys to being way too serious.
Some parts of this I don't understand. She and her husband seemed to have a really solid relationship. Both are a couple of great people. But right after she got the diagnosis, she divorced him. Amicably, apparently. He's still around and they go to things like back to school night together. So they are still somewhat of a team. But I guess she just didn't want to spend her remaining time with him. So the boys are living with her in the family house, and after she dies, they will be with him. I don't know if they will move, or if he will just move back into the house he used to live in. It's all a little weird. So for these boys, there will be that additional change. Basically switching parents. Hopefully they will stay in the same house. There's a huge support network for this family here.
So I don't understand some of her decisions, but I guess having cancer clarifies some things.
It could be a financial decision, to protect the family assets from anticipated hospital charges.
Perhaps they were having issues and she/he/they decided that was the best thing to do. Sometimes in these situations, the pain and stress of watching those one cares for going through is overwhelming. Perhaps she needed to just focus on her situation and not him. There are many reasons why marriages end after one partner finds out they have a terminal illness. The statistics I've seen on marriages dissolving after a TBI are well over 80%.**
**I don't know how that number transfers to cancer, but I assume it must be similar.
It could be a financial decision, to protect the family assets from anticipated hospital charges.
That's a good point.
I'm sorry, glatt.
An old school friend of mine had a tumor the size of a pool ball removed from his head two days ago. It was cancerous, so now he has to go through radiation etc.
It fucking sux. This is on top of my aunt having a boob chopped off last week, and another aunt having a lump discovered in her throat which is being ent'd today (being assessed by an ear, nose and throat specialist I should have said). Results pending.
One of the local boys around here is still in a coma after being in a terrible head on collision on new years day and the doctors are starting to suggest that they need to 'think about his wishes', and that's never a good phrase to hear.
I feel like there's just been a shitstorm of shitful things happen around me lately. So much so that I'm starting to get really paranoid about something going wrong with this baby. I'm no spring chicken. chances of health issues for me or the baby are way high this time around.
God I'm a fucking pussy sometimes. I just can't stop crying now. :(
Oh my.. .. .. So very sorry Ali. Seems to come all at once, doesn't it.
Hang in there. (((Hugs)))
It does Classic. I'll be ok though. Just a moment of weakness. We all have them from time to time. :) Thanks.
Hugs, Ali!
Sent by thought transference
My mood has hit the deck. Really missing my Pilaudog. Much as I look forward to Carrot, I'd sell my soul to have Pil back here with me now.
A friend who has been fighting colon cancer for the last few years is just about at the end of her journey.
And she passed away yesterday afternoon.
sucky suck suckful.
I'm sorry glatt.
Ach glatt, so sorry.
Seems to be everywhere right now. J was in Hastings yesterday for Romy's funeral. The friend I mentioned a little while agio as having cancer. She was his dad's ex, mother of his half sister. And the other family friend who died about three years ago of cancer was her best friend and former lodger.
Meanwhile J's stepmum has just lost both parents within a few days of each other.
It was so sad. Her dad was slipping away and they'd been told it would be within a couple of days. So, she was supposed to be travelling down to be with her mum and say goodbye to her Dad. They'd talked about her mum moving up North to be nearer once he'd gone.
Next day, as Mandy and Les were preparing to set off they received word that her Mum had been rushed into hospital with a suspected appendicitis. A few hours later she was dead. It had been a burst bowel and she died on the operating table.
The only consolation in the end was that, with her Dad unconscious, neither parent had to experience losing the other.
Poor Jude is shellshocked with it all. He loved Romy, she was a big part of his life, particularly as a teenager. Losing Ronnie a few years ago hit him hard too, she was a good friend. And Mandy's parents were effectively his grandparents from the age of 11. And losing Pilau had also floored him. His Dad had a heart attack last year which scared the shit out of everyone.
I was talking to him the other day and he just seemed slightly punch drunk.
Glatt, Dana - so sorry you're going through the mill.
Sent by thought transference
I have just had another friend tell me they've got a tumour in their brain and are having chemo. That's two people with brain tumours at the same time. Plus my aunt with breast cancer, and an uncle who's heading for a nursing home with alzhiemers.
I'm am so fucking sick of getting bad news. Every single day this last week, someone has told me something that alone would be enough to upset me.
Enough is a fucking nuff.
Ach damn, Ali, that's rough. Cyberhugs chika.
So sorry, Ali. The nice thing about brain tumors is they're generally pain-free (although chemo sucks no matter what kind of cancer it's treating.) I had a friend in college get treated for a brain tumor, and ultimately it went into remission and he's alive and fine today. I hope things work out the same for your friends.
I saw one of them yesterday. You all may remember I've mentioned the car accident I attended a couple of years ago and how I've remained friends with the man I helped? Well it's that man. the tumour has been caused by the accident or the plates in his head. The doctors don't really know.
He's been taking oral chemo for about a year now, and it has shrunk somewhat, but still too large to operate on. They say maybe down the track.
So anyway, yesterday we sat down for a chat, and it turns out I'm the first person he's told about this. He's known for more than a year and hasn't told a soul because he feels he's put his friends and family through enough with the accident.
Anyway, I suggested that he needs to tell his family if no one else because if it does all go balls up, they're going to feel terrible that they didn't spend as much time as they could with him etc. He said he's going to start by telling his mother (who's in her 70's) and then probably his older sons and see how that goes.
At least I can help him more now.
All things considered, that good advice Ali.
What a downer thread. I know, whatever.
Ali, I agree that he could make things easier for himself, and ultimately for the others around him if he were to share his knowledge of things. Not easy by itself but easier and better in the long run. Tough... so sorry.
Dana, I got nothing but sharing the sorrow of your story. Terrible.
glatt, that is sad, and a monumental lifetime marker. But this can be the point (upon reflection) at which things begin/began to get better. This has been anticipated, though dreaded, but still isn't really a surprise. I hope their shock and sadness is processed as soon and as safely as possible.
***
There's a story in the news here, well, in the national news too. Here's a link to the
local paper's coverage, but CNN, Fox, it's everywhere.
GRAHAM, Pierce County — Fire investigators on Monday morning were sifting through the rubble of Josh Powell's rental house, trying to determine what sparked Sunday's fire that authorities believe killed Powell and his two young sons moments after a caseworker brought them for a supervised visitation.
It appears as though the biological father, Josh Powell, killed himself and his two young sons. This story is a long and ugly one, and I don't care to restate the whole sordid bullshit now. But the thought that this dad would let his kids into the house, block the entry of the social worker and then blow up the house.. fucking fuck.
I know they call it "murder-suicide". I wish it were "suicide-oh well".
or in this case - "Suicide - Yay"!
From what I read, the social worker is completely traumatized. It was supposed to be a supervised visit for this very reason, the dad was nutzo. She let the kids run ahead of her, they got to the door before she did, and he locked her out. Then she had to watch the house blow up. One imagines the children were not silent through this horrific ordeal, either. That's the kind of guilt you never recover from. On the other hand, I really don't think she could have stopped him, at best she would have been inside with the kids when the whole place went up in flames.
One imagines the children were not silent through this horrific ordeal, either.
and to make it even worse
(if possible)
Officials: Powell children had head and neck wounds, hatchet found nearby
The preliminary autopsy results of Josh Powell and his two sons show that they suffered from carbon monoxide poisoning,
and the boys also suffered from other injuries.
Poor little buggers. What a fucking awful thing to happen.
Reading that article it sounds like Powell's father was a fucking nutjob as well.
Gods, how awful must the Grandparents feel? Persuading them to go for their visit when they just wantesd to stay and play. To do the 'right thing' like that and have it turn into this. My God that would never leave you.
Heart wrenching interview with the grandparents,
here.
Winner winner chicken dinner!
you can get that on a swim cap, apparently
[ATTACH]37242[/ATTACH]
The doctor at my local clinic barely speaks English, so I'm having trouble understanding what I'm supposed to be doing re booking myself into a hospital and arranging for scans for this baby. Over the last few days I've spoken with two hospitals, both of which haven't received a referral from this doctor but whom my doctor claims to have sent the forms to.
I've made an appointment tomorrow at my GP, so I'm going to let them have it. I'm fucking sick of it. If you want to work in the health care profession, please learn to speak the common language of the country you're trying to work in!!!
eta: I'm going to chat with some of my local friends and see if anyone knows of a doc who speaks English and might look after me through this pregnancy.
The doctor at my local clinic barely speaks English, so I'm having trouble understanding what I'm supposed to be doing re booking myself into a hospital and arranging for scans for this baby. Over the last few days I've spoken with two hospitals, both of which haven't received a referral from this doctor but whom my doctor claims to have sent the forms to.
I've made an appointment tomorrow at my GP, so I'm going to let them have it. I'm fucking sick of it. If you want to work in the health care profession, please learn to speak the common language of the country you're trying to work in!!!
eta: I'm going to chat with some of my local friends and see if anyone knows of a doc who speaks English and might look after me through this pregnancy.
congratulations for the baby!
and i don't know about australia but in many countries you have to take a written test for the local language in order for your diploma's to apply, so... have you considered communication via text?
lol nope. I think I'd rather just find a doctor who speaks english so I can explain what happened during my last pregnancy in order to get the best care possible. It's not that I have a problem with people with strong accents or who don't speak the language 100%, it's just that I consider my health to be pretty important, and if I don't feel I'm being understood, or if I can't understand what's being said to me, there's a problem, and being pregnant, I only have a limited time frame to work with. ;)
Last night Pearl had either a seizure or a heart arrhythmia, and went stiff and howled in either pain or confusion. The vet is betting on heart problems and a cardiologist is looking at her tomorrow.
Aw, Im so sorry for Pearls pain. I hope it doesn't happen again.
Sorry UT. It sucks when they can't tell you what's wrong.
The warbly howl was just terrible.
But I'm hopeful that all this vetting will get her a medication that will keep her alive and pain-free a while longer.
These dogs, they die too soon.
Ugh, that feeling gets you deep in your gut, when you see/hear your pet in pain or confused.
I hope she'll be OK, UT.
:(
Sorry UT. Hope the vet figures it all out.
Hugs to the lil one.
Oh, poor Pearl! Horrible when they go through something like that. Let us know how she gets on at the vets.
UT that is so scary! I hope everything goes well for Pearl!
Last night Pearl had either a seizure or a heart arrhythmia, and went stiff and howled in either pain or confusion. The vet is betting on heart problems and a cardiologist is looking at her tomorrow.
shit shit shit!
Our first calf was born 6 days ago we found it odd he could not stand. The vet told us today he has a congenital defect, he was born without a quadriceps muscle and a patella tendon in one leg WTF? 1 in 100,000 The vet will put him down :(
Poor calf. Poor cow too. She'll probably be pretty sad for a while.
Poor Pearl. I hope she's ok. My Sheba had an enlarged heart, but to my knowledge never had a seizure. She lived a long life. I'm sure Pearl will too.
Pearl is officially diagnosed as a heart patient, with congestive heart disease, and she is on a cocktail of drugs to maintain.
Hope she's feeling better.
:comfort:
Pearl is officially diagnosed as a heart patient, with congestive heart disease, and she is on a cocktail of drugs to maintain.
Both Pilau and Dante first showed slight heart murmurs around the age of 5 or 6, and were on heart meds by the age of 8/9. Pil continued on to 13 1/4 and Dante is still going.
UT I am so sorry.
She's being treated and if she continues to be well than she's still having a good life.
Yes, she had her murmur diagnosed at 8 and they said she would probably make 10 or 11. Now she's 12. They say 10% of dogs become cardiac patients. I'm just hoping the various drugs keep her going for some time.
It's much better news that she's a heart patient than a brain patient. When Bean started having seizures he had only two weeks left.
Sorry to hear about Pearl, UT. Let's hope the meds add many more years for her.
Yes, she had her murmur diagnosed at 8 and they said she would probably make 10 or 11. Now she's 12. They say 10% of dogs become cardiac patients. I'm just hoping the various drugs keep her going for some time.
It's much better news that she's a heart patient than a brain patient. When Bean started having seizures he had only two weeks left.
man, that must have been so scary. I'm glad she's gotten a less serious diagnosis and that she has you and the rest of her family taking good care of her.
Hang in there Pearl!
Dead cat in the road on the way to the school bus. Hector saw it too :( poor kitty
Felt exceptionally grim yesterday.
Threw up twice at school then more after I was sent home.
Felt so nauseous all day - I sat up until 23.00 despite being shattered, because I worried if I lay down it might start off my coughing again, and if I coughed I'd puke.
Less nausea today but still not convinced I'm not going to hurl.
Had a cup of tea this morning, and two dry crackers an hour ago.
Aside from that it's just been water.
I have very bloodshot eyes today.
Poor me.
Sure you're not pregnant? hehe
Unlikely without sperm...
Sorry Sundae. You can blame it on the kids. Filthy creatures. :)
There's been a bout or Norovirus going around my son's elementary school. Many of the teachers have huge jugs of hand sanitizer on their desks.
Silly thing is this hit me on Monday. BAM!
I'd been on half term break and was really looking forward to getting back, as I was getting on Mum's nerves.
And yes, Norovirus was suggested to me.
My niece and nephew both had it over the hols. But I couldn't have caught it from them either, as we didn't see them.
Just a random encounter.
Without sperm.
As my cow orker said "they're dropping like flies." We've had people out sick a lot lately, me included.
We probably get it from students, then it passes through the office where we are packed in like sardines. Snotty-headed creepy sardines.
You can tell people to stay home when they're sick, all the really cool health organizations say that, and they'll even tell us that here at work, but there's some kind of weird honor in dragging yourself into the office. Unless what you have going on that day can make or break the world (or you don't have sick days and need the money and I feel for those people because I've been there) stay home so you don't pass it around, for pete's sake.
Dead cat in the road on the way to the school bus. Hector saw it too :( poor kitty
Take your inspiration where you find it. These lads did.
[YOUTUBE]Wm_Avc6aacw[/YOUTUBE]
I cut the ever-loving shit out of my middle finger today with a vegetable peeler--just a little ol' vegetable peeler!--and now half the fingernail is gone. And with the large hunk of gauze wrapped around it, it's now significantly taller and puts me in a perpetual state of flipping everyone off.
Plz be sorry about my finger.
finger, I can't be mad at you.
lol...I am sorry for you Clod. Those peelers are nasty pieces of kitchen equipment! I've done it before although not as well as you appear to have done.
Hope it gets better soon. xx
Sorry about your finger I am.
Ha...I sliced the tip of my idex finger while peeling potatoes tonight. My finger is sorry for your finger.
I'm not sorry about your finger. You know why? Because now you can tell Mr. Fob that you can't wash any dishes because you have a cut on your finger. You can pawn that chore off onto him for at least three days.
(If you have any rubber gloves in the house, hide them.)
Ha! Mr. Clod actually does the dishes already, because it's his fault we don't finish eating dinner until 9:00 and by 9:30 I need to be getting ready for bed. He usually gets around to doing them about midnight, and says he really doesn't mind it because it's "contemplative."
Does he have a much older brother? ;)
Story of my life, girlfriend, story of my life. :lol:
Does he have a much older brother? ;)
Yes, but he's gay. :)
If all you want him for is to wash dishes then there's no problem.
Infi does not want to be a beard, thank you very much.
I'd be a moustache for the right guy, though. :eek:
omg was that ME? :bolt:
I'd ride a moustache for the right guy, though. :eek:
omg was that ME? :bolt:
Inferred, my friend, inferred. ;)
Inferred, my friend, inferred. ;)
Aluminium 2.698
Scandium 2.989
Bromine 3.122
Barium 3.594
Yttrium 4.469
Titanium 4.540
Selenium 4.809
Iodine 4.93
Europium 5.243
Germanium 5.323
Radium 5.50
Arsenic 5.776
Gallium 5.907
Vanadium 6.11
Lanthanum 6.145
Tellurium 6.232
Zirconium 6.506
Antimony 6.685
Cerium 6.770
Praseodymium 6.773
Ytterbium 6.965
Astatine ~7
Neodymium 7.007
Zinc 7.134
Chromium 7.15
Promethium 7.26
Tin 7.287
Indium 7.310
Manganese 7.44
Samarium 7.52
Iron 7.874
Gadolinium 7.895
Terbium 8.229
Dysprosium 8.55
Niobium 8.570
Cadmium 8.69
Holmium 8.795
Cobalt 8.86
Nickel 8.912
Copper 8.933
Erbium 9.066
Polonium 9.32
Ununhexium >9.32
Thulium 9.321
Bismuth 9.807
Ununpentium >9.807
Lutetium 9.84
Lawrencium >9.84
Actinium 10.07
Molybdenum 10.22
Silver 10.501
Lead 11.342
Ununquadium >11.342
Technetium 11.50
Thorium 11.72
Footfootfoot 11.81
Thallium 11.85
Ununtrium >11.85
Palladium 12.020
Ruthenium 12.37
Rhodium 12.41
Hafnium 13.31
Einsteinium 13.5 (Estimate)
Curium 13.51
Mercury 13.5336
Ununbium >13.5336
Americium 13.69
Berkelium 14.79
Californium 15.10
Protactinium 15.37
Tantalum 16.654
Rutherfordium 18.1
Uranium 18.95
Tungsten 19.25
Gold 19.282
Roentgenium >19.282
Plutonium 19.84
Neptunium 20.25
Rhenium 21.02
Platinum 21.46
Darmstadtium >21.46
Osmium 22.610
Iridium 22.650
Seaborgium 35 (Estimate)
Meitnerium 35 (Estimate)
Bohrium 37 (Estimate)
Dubnium 39 (Estimate)
Hassium 41 (Estimate)
Fermium Unknown
Mendelevium Unknown
Nobelium Unknown
Ununoctium Unknown
Aluminium 2.698
Scandium 2.989
Bromine 3.122
Barium 3.594
Yttrium 4.469
Titanium 4.540
Selenium 4.809
Iodine 4.93
Europium 5.243
Germanium 5.323
Radium 5.50
Arsenic 5.776
Gallium 5.907
Vanadium 6.11
Lanthanum 6.145
Tellurium 6.232
Zirconium 6.506
Antimony 6.685
Cerium 6.770
Praseodymium 6.773
Ytterbium 6.965
Astatine ~7
Neodymium 7.007
Zinc 7.134
Chromium 7.15
Promethium 7.26
Tin 7.287
Indium 7.310
Manganese 7.44
Samarium 7.52
Iron 7.874
Gadolinium 7.895
Terbium 8.229
Dysprosium 8.55
Niobium 8.570
Cadmium 8.69
Holmium 8.795
Cobalt 8.86
Nickel 8.912
Copper 8.933
Erbium 9.066
Polonium 9.32
Ununhexium >9.32
Thulium 9.321
Bismuth 9.807
Ununpentium >9.807
Lutetium 9.84
Lawrencium >9.84
Actinium 10.07
Molybdenum 10.22
Silver 10.501
Lead 11.342
Ununquadium >11.342
Technetium 11.50
Thorium 11.72
Footfootfoot 0.8
Thallium 11.85
Ununtrium >11.85
Palladium 12.020
Ruthenium 12.37
Rhodium 12.41
Hafnium 13.31
Einsteinium 13.5 (Estimate)
Curium 13.51
Mercury 13.5336
Ununbium >13.5336
Americium 13.69
Berkelium 14.79
Californium 15.10
Protactinium 15.37
Tantalum 16.654
Rutherfordium 18.1
Uranium 18.95
Tungsten 19.25
Gold 19.282
Roentgenium >19.282
Plutonium 19.84
Neptunium 20.25
Rhenium 21.02
Platinum 21.46
Darmstadtium >21.46
Osmium 22.610
Iridium 22.650
Seaborgium 35 (Estimate)
Meitnerium 35 (Estimate)
Bohrium 37 (Estimate)
Dubnium 39 (Estimate)
Hassium 41 (Estimate)
Fermium Unknown
Mendelevium Unknown
Nobelium Unknown
Ununoctium Unknown
ftfyLOL!
That's a lot of falafels...
Today started foggy, but it burned off midmorning and felt like Spring.
So I went outside at lunchtime because neither of my teachers had an immediate need and I get restless with 70 minutes of lunchtime to fill.
Right before the whistle blew, I was talking to two of my Year Twos and they pointed out something that looked like faeces to one side of the Quiet Area (bark chips and benches etc). They told me it was poo, and it did look suspiciously like poo, but then it couldn't be. The playground was used for two Playtimes earlier in the day, so it couldn't have been there then, and an animal on the playground between 11.15 and 12.00 would be spotted! It was right ouside Class 6 for a start.
I went in before the children and wondered if I should raise it (and yes, I was thinking about clearing it up myself because it didn't look good regardless). Events got away from me. I needed to write a social story for Mars, because he shouted at one of our student teachers yesterday. We then had a one-on-one and by the time I came back in, the story had spread anyway.
Our HLTA sidled up and told me someone had done a poo on the playground, and could I keep an ear and a nose out to see if we could work this out. I felt a little relief that the matter was out of my hands (oof!)
Next I knew, our HLTA was talking to the HLTA in the class next door (my morning class - Tiger's class) and there was discussion about moist wipes and replacement clothes and all. It was a boy in that class. One who has bowel problems and one I have cleaned up after before. This was a bad one - what ended up on the playground had obviously tumbled through underwear and trousers. He was in a bit of a state. To say the least. But then this is a boy who has had to take his shoes home in a sealed bag after a previous explosive event.
I'm very sorry for him - he has a known condition. He must have been horrified and too scared to tell.
I feel sorry for Mrs J - crikey me I dodged a bullet there.
And for Mrs I, who from what I can gather was the outside pooper-scooper.
I really wish I'd done something or said something immediately.
Next time I won't sit and think. At the very least I'll raise a concern with a teacher and get their advice.
I wouldn't blame myself too much if I were you Sundae. These things happen.
I wonder about why the boy isn't wearing those larger nappies that fit like undies if he's still having accidents when he's school age. surely the humiliation of having accidents at school would be worth it?
SonofV asked me today, "Dad, what is this k-o-n-y thing?" He spelled it to me. I had no idea, and said so. He said it's everywhere. Oops, guess I live in a hole.
fast forward to this evening
My girlfriend, who I love very much, asked me "Have you heard of this Kony 2012 thing?". No, there's this hole and all... wtf? I told her about SonofV's similar query. She said it was the buzz the minute she walked in the door at work. Ok, ok, please help me here. Turns out there's a video.
KONY 2012 is a film and campaign by Invisible Children that aims to make Joseph Kony famous, not to celebrate him, but to raise support for his arrest and set a precedent for international justice.
[YOUTUBE]Y4MnpzG5Sqc[/YOUTUBE]
I'm not even done with the video and I have to post this. I'm not a chicken little kind of guy, but this is a great piece of film-making, please do watch it. It's thirty minutes and so far, totally worth it.
For those of you who need more text with your teasers, here you go:
Grisly killings, abductions, and rapes allegedly committed by the Lord's Resistance Army (LRA) in central Africa have garnered international attention following the release of a video highlighting abuses committed by the group and its leader, Joseph Kony.
The half-hour film (above) produced by Invisible Children follows a former child soldier named Jacob. The film issues a call for action, reportedly aiming to raise awareness by making Joseph Kony a household name.
So Joseph Kony is the hero of the story?
If you watch the movie, there's a description of what's going on that starts at about the nine minute mark. The film maker tells his very young son what he's doing, including a description of Joseph Kony. I don't want spoil it for you, just go watch the movie.
My kids and their friends are all talking about this clip.
Its all over FB. Has been for a week or so. I posted that same clip there yesterday.
There are a few mainstream movies that have documented this (or similar) issue. Blood Diamond is the big one, but Hotel Rwanda is another. The Last King of Scotland touches on it too.
It's amazing how common this practice is.
I first heard of this Kony thing about half an hour ago. There was a little article in the paper. Somebody in the article was saying that sure, Kony is horrible, but to blame all the central Africa problems on him is very unfair, because it's common practice there.
But I'd be in favor of somebody other than the US military putting a stop to the inhumane behavior in the world. Especial that done by this guy.
I had actually heard of Kony before yesterday. I'm not trying to be cool, it's just a thing I knew. That video still upset me though. I'm glad this thing has hit the mainstream.
Most of the kids I know have purchased (or had their parents purchase) the action kit and plan on plastering stuff all over the place during April. (20th I think).
It's going viral in early March. I don't know if it will wait until April!
Kony is a BAD person. He is not the only one, but if we can rustle up some action against him, it will either put the others on notice or create a mechanism for dealing with others.
I've had to cancel my trip down to Sundae's this weekend :(
Partly because I didn;'t get my act together and organise the details last week, and now can't get ahold of her :p
But mostly, because my skin has gone mental over the last few days. Carrot has something called 'walking dandruff'. It's a type of mite and is apparently very common in puppies. vet said most pups have it at some point. In fact, she says, whenever she deals with a puppy, she almost always ends up with a mad rash from it.
Most people don't get anything worse than a little bite, but if you're sensitive to them, it can make for a really bad allergic reaction.
Which on the one hand is bloody inconvenient and making my skin crawl just at the thought of it...but on the other hand is something of a relief as it explains why my skin has gone so bad, so fast. A mild flare I always expect from a pup, but this is rapid and nasty.
It's also a relief because the biting at his back legs has turned out to be a nice, treatable, normal puppy thing and not the horrible bone or joint problems that my slightly overactive imagination was suspecting :p
Pissed I didn't get down to Sundae's though. I was really looking forward to seeing her. But I'd had a bath and applied various creams and ointments and was just so uncomfortable, I realised there was no way I was doing a 5 hour train journey.
I wonder where she is...hasn't been around here in a few days or so?
Your description of how your skin feels reminds me of that scene from that movie that came out a long time ago.
You know the one I mean.
It reminds me of my angioedema which seems to have taken a turn for the worse and is especially bad on my right ankle and both arms. :(
Those scratches in the picture I showed earlier scarred. Like they're whiter than the rest of my arm. But surrounded by new scratches and scabs. Attractive.
Yeah, Infi, that sounds like a bucketful of fun and no mistake.
Your description of how your skin feels reminds me of that scene from that movie that came out a long time ago.
You know the one I mean.
This is the one. [COLOR=Red]
Don't watch this it you're sensitive to gore![/COLOR]
[youtube]hITqzI4uqj8&hl[/youtube]
Didn't I warn you? But you had to watch it anyway, didn't you. I bet you wish you hadn't.
Oh. Oh, that's just one of the most awesome horror flicks.
Though, I admit, I've never actually watched that scene through. That's one i tend to look away from :P
How business thwarts the intent of a law...
Oregonians got sick and tired of motorists (Californians :rolleyes:) throwing
beer cans and bottles out onto the roadsides, into the rivers, and elsewhere.
So in 1971, Oregon's first "bottle bill" was passed that required a deposit on aluminum and glass containers.
The law was credited with reducing litter and increasing container recycling,
with returns amounting to about 90% of those sold.
Stores selling beer and soda were required to collect a deposit
on each container (5 and 2 cents for cans and bottles, respectively).
They were also required to accept the returns of these containers
and refund the full amount of the deposits.
Stores soon lobbied for amendments to restrict refunds to only those
brands and sizes that the store actually sold.
For the unique brands, it meant customers had to return to the same store for refunds.
The stores were allowed to keep all deposits on those that were not returned
Next came the technical development of machines that would receive the glass containers,
keep a running tally of which bottles were good in that store for refunds and
reject those that were not eligible, then break the bottles into small bits in a bin.
A printed receipt allowed the customer to get their $ refund from the store.
Now, the beverage industry has lobbied the legislature for another amendment
to allow stores to
close their bottle-return operations,
and instead require customers to deliver the bottles to a "central location"
for their returns and deposits.
These centers are more than a mile from some of the affected stores
[COLOR="DarkRed"]How long will it be before the roadsides are again littered with bottles and cans
from people who do not have the motivation or resources to travel
to these centers to complete the recycling cycle.[/COLOR] :mad2:
Salem Statesman Journal
3/9/12
New Salem BottleDrop center opens doors for sneak peak
Oregon Beverage Recycling Cooperative that collects recycled bottles and cans
throughout the state opened the “mega redemption center” as part of a pilot program
designed to simplify the bottle deposit and redemption process by having
full-service redemption centers centrally located near several large retailers.<snip>
Lamp, you might be extrapolating a bit.
You're assuming that fewer bottles and cans will be returned under the new arrangement. If the bottle return centers take all returnable bottles, and not just specific types and sizes, it could actually increase the rate of returns.
I thought only South Australia had a deposit scheme like that. Oregon, I salute you!
Here, there are a few dozen recycling depots - the retail shops don't have to take the empties. The problem of people not bothering is solved by the presence of homeless people (yes, even in our hippy-fascist social utopia ;) ) who scratch together a trickle of income by collecting and returning empty bottles and cans.
Pretty much as soon as you cross the border into another state, the roadsides are littered with enough drink containers that it would be economically viable to collect them if only they had deposits.
Yeah, all recycling of bottles and cans happens at centralised locations over here. As far back as I can remember, that's how it's been.
We still have litter, but overall I think australia is pretty good in comparison to some countries.
Zen, you can still collect cans for deposits in Qld.
I think you're exaggerating the issue of litter on the road sides a bit. At least, that's from my perspective of the roads I travel.
Lamp, you might be extrapolating a bit.
You're assuming that fewer bottles and cans will be returned under the new arrangement.
If the bottle return centers take all returnable bottles,
and not just specific types and sizes, it could actually increase the rate of returns.
Yes, you may be right...but here is some more extrapolation from this cynic.
At the next legislative session, we will see crowds of people parading at the Capital Building,
complaining about traffic around these centers and the riff raff that congregate there,
and smells and garbage that litter the area around these centers.
An the beverage industry will suddenly find that these centers do not make a profit,
and so staffing will deteriorate and eventually the lobbyists will convince the Legislature
that the public really does not want all this hassle and the law will be repealed.
Bah, humbug poo on the beverage industry... they've been fighting this law since 1970.
Ali, is that for deposits or scrap recycling value?
Here, all cans and bottles have 10 cent deposit, including aluminium, glass and plastic. Is that what you have, or is it mostly aluminium for the scrap value?
There are roads in Victoria and New South Wales that have a good thirty year accumulation of rubbish along them.
Nah, scrap recycling.
Maybe we're just tidier in Qld. ;) (although I do travel roads in northern NSW and they usually seem pretty good to me)
Maybe all the retirees up there haven't got the coordination to drive and lob litter out the window at the same time. :)
I thought only South Australia had a deposit scheme like that. Oregon, I salute you!
Here, there are a few dozen recycling depots - the retail shops don't have to take the empties. The problem of people not bothering is solved by the presence of homeless people (yes, even in our hippy-fascist social utopia ;) ) who scratch together a trickle of income by collecting and returning empty bottles and cans.
Pretty much as soon as you cross the border into another state, the roadsides are littered with enough drink containers that it would be economically viable to collect them if only they had deposits.
Michigan is 10c per bottle or can. many states have a deposit scheme. Only a few are 10c, though. A great fundraiser for youth groups etc. And the homeless.....
I wonder where she is...hasn't been around here in a few days or so?
Maybe her internet connection went down and she doesn't know how to fix it with her parents out of town. Did anyone speak to her on the phone recently?
Dana said she can't get ahold of her...so I figured that was by phone.
Hmmmm.
Her mobile just goes straght to message. I thought I had her landline as well, but it's the one from where she used to live before she went bac to Aylesbury.
Here I am!
Everything is falling down around my ears at home.
A power cut on Monday morning knocked out the modem. Before I've always just called TalkTalk and they've reset it. This time it didn't work. The support staff was amazed when I read out the serial number - it is no longer under warranty. Quel surprise, we got it in 2007. So I contacted Mum (for permission) and my bro (for advice) and they signed us up for another year and are sending us another "router". Which will arrive in 5-10 working days.
As well as that my phone battery died. Mum and I share a charger, after I managed to hoover mine up. Our shared charger is therefore in Lanzarote.
So I couldn't access Dana's mobile number from my mobile. I couldn't access anyone else's number from my Contact Details folder on the Cellar. And I couldn't let any other Dwellars know via email either!!! I have addresses saved in a Word document, but that's it.
I can't access from work as it is an educational environment. Hotmail, the Cellar, eBay etc are barred.
And now the boiler has packed up too.
So no heating and no hot water. Grrrr. It's more an inconvenience than a real problem, but it's the one I can't solve and the one that will stress the 'rents out most when they get home.
I'm at my bro's at the moment. Wonder of wonders he has an old charger I can use, so my phone is on charge as I type.
And I've requisitioned his PC for at least a couple hours.
Hello!
Sounds like it would have been the worst possible time to come down after all :p
[eta] Once I'd got over the disappointment of realising I was too ill to come down anyway and making that decision, I started to pull out the positives. Not having to bugger about with Carrot's bedtime routine in the first month is no bad thing really.
Like I said before, I didn't think you would want to leave Carrot.
And I mean that in a totally practical way.
You are establishing rules and routines, trust and a sense of family.
I felt bad enough when I got my boys on a Friday night and then left to go to work Saturday 09.00-17.00. But at least they had a chance to explore the flat together and I was home for the evening and night. Diz had a hard time adjusting, but he had Dylan to make him brave and to snuggle up with. And he was already a year old.
Really sorry to hear about your flare up.
That sounds horrible chick.
Please take good care of yourself.
The ability to rationalize: what separates us from the lower animals.
Got put off for a couple more weeks... again.
Fukkinfukk
Got put off for a couple more weeks... again.
Fukkinfukk
Oh GAWD that suxxx!
yeah. agreed. my poor attitude is upsetting me today, and news like yours ain't helpin.
I have some freaky bumps on my eyelid. I looked this up online and concluded that it's one of two conditions, neither of which is serious. As it happens I have a doctor's appointment next week for another thing (I sound real healthy right now, lol) so I'll get him to take a look. These bumps come and go though, so knowing my luck they will be in hiding when I see the doc. :P
Usually I don't check symptoms online because I always conclude I have either cancer, brain tumour or lupus, and even though that's now what happened today, these bump things are still really vexing me. I want to know a way to get rid of them and I want it right now.
Cut your eyelids off.
Blueflame, you'll have to learn to be more specific. ;)
I really miss Pilau right now. I adore my little Carrot cake he's a gorgeous little chap, but I miss my old boy. I wish he was here right now, I could use one of his beardie hugs.
Oh Dana! Of course you do! I'd give you a big ol' beardie hug if I could right now!
[loses fight to keep mind out of gutter]
I had a lengthy phone conversation with my dad, only realizing after the fact that I think he was drunk (at 4:00 in the afternoon.)
During this time, he ranted angrily about my no-good brother and his pushover mother (nothing new there); informed me that I was a sweetheart and he loved me but let's face it, my brother is photogenic and I'm not; and discussed at length his lifelong struggles with alcohol, including how he used to pick me up from preschool while drunk off his ass.
He's alone, he's stubborn, and I'm just waiting for the day when I have to go find him dead in his house, and probably a couple of weeks gone at that, because no one else would think to look for him.
Wait. Has your dad MET you? You're cuter than cute in every picture I've seen (and your live video.) Your brother is better in pictures? Wuddever. Pffffft on him.
:comfort:
Gun alert on ElderSon's campus. Shelter in place the alerts say. But no more. Fuuuuuuck.
Some folks at a proprietary school in Columbus got stabbed Wednesday. Samaritans wrestled a knife from the freak of nature and he produced a couple more. Schools are a dangerous place to be. :(
Hope all is well, V.
All clear now.
Reports say it was a student carrying an umbrella "with a samurai sword handle". That's why the original report said "rifle". I *guess so*.
Better safe than sorry. Funny note (NOW it's funny, before it was frustrating). No answer at first from ElderSon, not text, not email, not f*book, etc. Why? Cause he was asleep. We all woke him up. Extra funny points, he's three time zones earlier than me.
Last night at the church communication team meeting, we got a new member. The Pastor's son-in-law, he is only 21 or so and a christian for almost a year. I asked him to be an usher 4 weeks ago and he has served twice. He tells our Pastor that he wants to be a preacher, and is taking seminary classes on-line. That does not qualify him to be a deacon in any church I have ever been any part of. I am on the verge of turning in my key and quitting the church.
There was a lot of silence from the other team members during the meeting, so I doubt I am not the only one that feels this way. I have been born again for over 30 years and it is only just now I have become a deacon (I should explain that the communication team is what would be the equivalent of deacons in another church). This kid is not even a declared member of the church. I have been a member of the church (which has been in existence for 4 years) for 2 years, and I am Lead Usher.
Thanks for letting me vent.
I know a woman, an old boss, who became some sort of clergy online. She married a young couple, and I went to that wedding. The whole thing was odd to me. Well, they were all pretty odd in their own rights.
I'm not religious, but I see what you mean, fargon.
All clear now.
Reports say it was a student carrying an umbrella "with a samurai sword handle". That's why the original report said "rifle". I *guess so*.
Better safe than sorry. Funny note (NOW it's funny, before it was frustrating). No answer at first from ElderSon, not text, not email, not f*book, etc. Why? Cause he was asleep. We all woke him up. Extra funny points, he's three time zones earlier than me.
Duh. Everyone knows rifles are carried in guitar cases.
Whu? A gunman on campus? Da-a-ad, you woke me up for that? :zzz:
:lol:
I know a woman...
I knew a woman,
Lovely in her bones.
When small birds sighed
She would sigh back at them.
She married a young couple, and I went to that wedding. ...
Isn't that bigamy? Or bigaher? Or something?
She officiated the wedding. I might have been less uncomfortable had it been a freaky deaky three way wedding! :lol:
Where's that Kathleen Madigan bit about attending a wedding where the woman is marrying a goat?
My 17 yo neice is 4 months pregnant.
With twins.
She's keeping them.
I'm not directly affected, but the family is in mourning.
They'll all come round of course, but it's wailing and gnashing of teeth today.
I think she's ill-prepared and foolish, but once they're born she'll have babies she couldn't imagine living without.
I'm trying to be the voice of reason, but it's not going down well (I don't understand apparently, because I don't have children). So I've come up to log on as my bro has fixed the router. Forgive me if I immediately log off again and just go hibernate.
Dang, Sundae, that sucks, but like you say, not really anything you can do but make the best of it. Is the dad gonna stay around, or is he gone already?
Is the dad that older bloke she was with?
uhhhh. sorry for all involved - especially the kids.
Sometimes young Mums make fantastic Mums, even if they don't seem like they would be.
With a bit of support from her family and lots of love, she will prevail. So will the kids. She's chosen a hard road for herself, but she must feel that she can do it, so the best thing for the family to do is get on with the job of helping her as much as they can.
Give her this pamphlet:
Sometimes young Mums make fantastic Mums, even if they don't seem like they would be.
With a bit of support from her family and lots of love, she will prevail. So will the kids. She's chosen a hard road for herself, but she must feel that she can do it, so the best thing for the family to do is get on with the job of helping her as much as they can.
Agreeing here. Important not to sell her short. Often people rise (or sink) to our expectations of them. Point her in the right direction, surround her with good role models for how to mother, and the instinct should kick in.
I suspect that's Sundae's position on it too. Trouble is there's nowt quite like a family for ramping things up into a crisis if at all possible. Which is one of the key reasons I stay the fuck off facebook. Lot of my extended family on there.
@ Sundae: things will calm down soon enough. Something else will quietly become the thing everybody's getting heated over.
@ fargon: that's really horrible. Try not to let it devalue your own achievements within the organisation though. You earned it, he got handed it. But that means you did earn it and that matters way more than the fact he didn't.
Fargon, you may have to stand up and tell them the boy doesn't yet have the education or the time served to do this. I'd try to stay positive and helpful because if no one steps up that church will empty. good luck g
What the family is most upset about is that she was the golden child. Up until the first lot of shenanigans anyway. And then she was back in grace. She has always been bright and educationally motivated, getting top grades and looking to be the first person in our family to go to Uni.
They now believe she has thrown her life away and will never do anything, ever.
This is part of what I am trying to nix - I know some really old women who've gone back into edumacation.
But what I can't deny is that life is going to be tough for her for a good few years.
Buying (and manouevering!) a double pushchair, two lots of nappies and feed (I doubt she will try to breastfeed - that in itself would be an additional challenge anyway), double sets of clothing from now until at least 16 - winter coats, shoes, uniforms etc.
This isn't the chap from before. It's a lad from football - they met when he was 19 and he's 20 now. They've been together five months. Yup. He dropped out of college but was volunteering because he wanted to go into football coaching. He's now taken a job with his Uncle. My sister didn't have much information on him - they've not wanted to see him or talk to him. I gently suggested that he was and would now always be a family member, but I got a long-suffering look and was told that that was not a guarantee.
He seems to want to be around - she's been to stay with him and his family most weekends and his Mum bought her some pyjamas... They are not what you would want as in-laws though. His Dad is no longer with his Mum and has just had a baby with his new partner. Sis thinks she is now living on the Jeremy Kyle Show (a bit like Maury). She doesn't see that perhaps the sky isn't falling after all and maybe a loving reaction is all you can have once the die has been cast. It's always been that way with us. That's why I got no support from my family when I was in mental health daycare. Not one phone call or visit from any of them. OMG - it's like she's a Jeremy Kyle guest!! How humiliating!!!
The thing that surprised me the most is that she should be eligible for a two bedroomed flat by December and will be taking it. She'll be 18, the babies will be approx three months (due date August, but twins are often premature). And my sister is mourning the loss of her, but of course she can't live at home. Wha..?! For 17 years we've had to fit our family lives around my niece. She dictated what time we ate Christmas Dinner, where my Dad had his 60th birthday meal, what day family BBQs fell on. Now in surely her most needful hour she is going to be left alone in a flat with two babies?
I mean of course they will offer some support, but I am honestly shocked that they are assuming she will move out. I'd have thought they'd move heaven and earth to keep her at home, even to the extent of us having my nephew live here (he's always been second best).
Part of what is eating me up is personal. Grandad's fridge, freezer, cooker and basic kitchen things are stored in my sister's garage. For me. For when Mum & Dad get their social housing - they are now on a priority list. Those are now going to A. My sister has an endowment meant to pay for a new car and insurance for A on her 18th birthday. That will now pay to have her new place painted and carpeted, but they need all the things left to me to help furnish it.
What can I say without looking like a beastly, selfish bitch? Can't help how I feel though.
All I can do is remember two wrongs don't make a right. If I act like my neice has preferred family status then I miss the point of being a loving and supportive Aunt. And it's true she has a harder path ahead of her than I do right now.
Please forgive both my rambling and my appalling streak of self-interest.
A huge issue in front of her is providing for 2 kids. Shit, it was hard enough for me when I had one at that age. Wishing them all the best.
Aww, Sundae. That sort of thing is hard on the family, but everyone will pull together. I've only seen my great niece in real life once (she's just now starting to crawl) because they live far away but I will be seeing her more in the coming months.
For us, since we'll never be grandparents, we get the joy of being great aunts. I expect you'll regale us with stories of the twins' shenanigans, or I hope so anyway.
Don't sweat the other stuff. :)
edit: I'm a bit disconcerted about your grandpa's stuff though. That seems a bit...shitty. I'm sorry, hon.
Welcome to my world. :( I hope you feel better soon.
I'm a bit disconcerted about your grandpa's stuff though. That seems a bit...shitty. I'm sorry, hon.
Same thing happened with my sister ,She got ALL Our Grand Mothers stuff ALL ,
I got some steak Knifes , and got to help ( do by my self) carry every thing down 3 stories load it on a truck then carry it up a mud hill ( lousey ass truck wouldnt make it up the slope ) to her new house
stay strong and help where you can , you will be a FUN Auntee !!!
Sundae, she totally will need her own place. If she stays at home with two babies everyone will come to resent each other. She'll need her own space, her supporters will need their refuge. It's not like they're shipping her off to Australia.
As for your things, they're in somebody else's garage for an uncertain time in the future when you inherit/live alone in/are forced to move out/what? your parents house? (1) Putting them in your niece's flat and them getting used seems like a win all around to me. And are you sure everyone saw them as yours? or were they just for the next person to need them, the assumption being that that probably would be you? And if they are specifically yours, can't you look on it as a loan until such time as you need them? Often things don't last very well in storage. I'm sure you can find a tactful way to remind them that -whilst you don't begrudge her using them- you will eventually need them. Maybe buy her replacements for the small items each birthday and Christmas instead of an extravagant personal present... Or buy them for you instead of giving her a gift (2) Won't your parents leave what's already in the house/can't you have that?
Sometimes young Mums make fantastic Mums, even if they don't seem like they would be.
With a bit of support from her family and lots of love, she will prevail. So will the kids. She's chosen a hard road for herself, but she must feel that she can do it, so the best thing for the family to do is get on with the job of helping her as much as they can.
Agreeing here. Important not to sell her short. Often people rise (or sink) to our expectations of them. Point her in the right direction, surround her with good role models for how to mother, and the instinct should kick in.
These are textbook examples of why I stay here. You guys are smart, wise, funny, compassionate.
GAWD I fucking hate this job.
Every time BEAAATCH in accounting has one of her freakout math moments she sends an email to everyone and their dog and they all look at me like "what?" and I'm like "what? what the eff is she even talking about?" and I'm so damn tired of this place.
My job shouldn't be sending me into anxiety attacks every single day, I shouldn't want to throw up before I come in, morale shouldn't be so bad that everyone is walking around on eggshells so as not to upset management but knowing they won't make decent money at any similar job, we all shouldn't be saying 'yes massa no massa" and that phrase didn't come from me it came from Af-Am cow orkers.
There's more to life, isn't there?
Where? Where do I get the lucky I don't have to work agenda? DId I miss a memo? Did I hold my head wrong?
Seriously, I'm so tired of it. :(
Hugs and :flower: to Sundae and IM.
I'm sorry you guys are having a bad go of it right now.
I guess the kitchen stuff is not officially mine, only in assumption. Grandad wanted me to have them and Dad moved them into Laura's specifically for that reason. As I said, Mum & Dad are at the top of the housing list now, so although it's been a long time since I moved in, that time is definitely coming to an end.
I accept they are family items and of course I wouldn't begrudge her having a cooker and a fridge, I just felt pushed out. Illogical. As I pretty much always am with my family. I won't be left without of course.
My parents aren't moving into furnished housing. The Trust only provides the apartment or bungalow at a set rent and does all the maintenance and repairs. It's a specialist charity for older people who want to remain independent but can't necessarily stay in their own houses.
And yes, A will be getting practical present for the next 15 + years from all of us I think :)
My SIL is already being eyed up for her Boots discount card spending power...
Told my close colleagues at school today. It's out there on places like Facebook now, so I'd rather tell them personally. They all have familes, all have at least one daughter and are certainly not judgemental. It was nice to hear positive comments rather than doom & gloom, even if they did wince a little to start with. Two of the staff know my sister's family anyway, and others have children at the same schools as A and my nephew, so it's better to be open - she's showing now as she's petite and it is twins after all..
Oh Infi. I've been there. The feeling nauseous, the anxiety attacks. I was hardly in the rat race but I hated my work so much I felt as burned out as someone who in a job high-powered enough to get £1m bonuses... without the £1m of course.
What can I say - I left it behind and found a job I loved but had to move back home and give up my freedom to do so. And as above, my housing position becomes more precarious every month. Once I am made technically homeless by my parents' move, I should get some form of subsidised housing eventually. But even meeting the bills is going to be damned tough. I might end up taking any extra work I can find. At present I am constantly searching for a second job but rejecting fast food work and cleaning as jobs that will give me the same feelings you are having now. But if it comes to work at KFC or go without electricity I won't have a choice.
Chin up. You're doing far better than you think.
Yeah, following your bliss is a myth. The only way you can do that is to first prostitute yourself out to someone with money.
Or win the lottery.
But I'm not bitter.
My freaky eye is getting freakier - the upper eyelid still has bumps and now I have a swollen lower eyelid. If I didn't already have an appointment tomorrow I'd be down there now begging them to squeeze me in before the end of the day. Everything about eyes freaks me the hell out and I don't like this one bit!
Hayfever may be exacerbating the problem so I've taken a pill and put some eye drops in. I need to calm down. My eye and I will survive until morning, right? ... RIGHT?
:P
Just as I figured: sputter spit w-w-w-w-hat? Please to provide an answer by close of business tomorrow.
I provided MY answer. Sent it to my boss with all the numbers from 3 years and two programs, for millions and millions and millions of dollars, laid out in a nice spreadsheet. Fresh and clear as a bell. THREE freaking weeks ago.
But boss didn't answer the Wigs O' Big and I once again look bad after Panic Lady reiterated the question today and again including the ones who are all "wh-wh-wh...?"
Something needs to change, but I don't know how or where. :mecry:
Just as I figured: sputter spit w-w-w-w-hat? Please to provide an answer by close of business tomorrow.
I provided MY answer. Sent it to my boss with all the numbers from 3 years and two programs, for millions and millions and millions of dollars, laid out in a nice spreadsheet. Fresh and clear as a bell. THREE freaking weeks ago.
But boss didn't answer the Wigs O' Big and I once again look bad after Panic Lady reiterated the question today and again including the ones who are all "wh-wh-wh...?"
Something needs to change, but I don't know how or why. :mecry:
Was it on an email? What I'd do is resend the original email, with a "You don't seem to have received my email of three weeks ago" message. To your boss, cc (or bcc if you're feeling sneaky) to everyone else that matters and a few that don't. Cover Your Ass that way. ((((hugs))))
I know. But numbers have changed in some areas (unclosed years) so to resend those numbers doesn't really give the big picture.
I'm updating the spreadsheet then I will reply to my boss and her boss saying something innocuous about the numbers changing since my original reply 3 weeks ago.
I'm NOT the problem here. :(
Thanks limey.
I know. But numbers have changed in some areas (unclosed years) so to resend those numbers doesn't really give the big picture.
I'm updating the spreadsheet then I will reply to my boss and her boss saying something innocuous about the numbers changing since my original reply 3 weeks ago.
I'm NOT the problem here. :(
Thanks limey.
Attaboy!
Oh I'm &Sundae- i wish i was at a reg. Keyboard i would say more but the kindle does not lend itself to fluent thought.
I'm thinking of you both - not that they does any good!
I feel for you both - been there. Both the family thing and the job thing. Hugs.
IM...it seems like only yesterday you started that job and had such high hopes. I'm sorry it's all gone pear shaped. Is it time to move on?
Talking about finding your bliss and having to prostitute yourself for the job you really want. Sounds like marriage to me. ;)
Sundae - I reckon you've had enough time to bitch and moan about this problem. Maybe it's time to get the shit off the liver and say what you need to say to the relevant people, then get on with the job of helping your niece. She's going to need your love and support a lot more than your resentment, and although it doesn't happen often, I tend to agree with monsters post above even if it does sound a bit harsh.
I hope you both come out of this smelling like roses, cause shit stinks. ;)
I don't think Sundae sounds one bit resentful. FTR, Sundae, I think
I know how you feel. Similar has happened in.my family.-)
Thanks Ali.
I am really being negative, and I hate feeling this way. There are so many good things about this job. For one thing, my cow orkers are some of the best people on earth. But there's pressure from above and even the seasoned (years and years) professionals are war-weary.
I found out on the way out tonight that one of my esteemed colleagues had to stay over...not because she was behind or had been off, but because she helped out by taking someone's place today and therefore wasn't doing her "priority" role today. (I'm being as vague as possible.) But this woman...and the rest of the crew...they're incredible people and they work very hard. We only hear about the things we do wrong.
I'll be OK. Part mid-life crisis and part some sense of entitlement I guess that I should be going in to 'fun' not 'work.' Meaning, of course, that work is work and while parts of it can be great fun it's still work and fraught with obstacles. I'm just old and bloated and tired. ;)
Bri, thanks sweetie. I felt guilty about being such a noodge but your supportive words made me feel better. :)
I tend to agree with monsters post above even if it does sound a bit harsh.
That wasn't harsh, honey, that was the fucking sugar-coated version.
Infi, resend the original email as per limey, then mention that some of the figures have changed and you are working on that right now to give them an even more up-to-date version.
GAWD I fucking hate this job.
My job shouldn't be sending me into anxiety attacks every single day,
I shouldn't want to throw up before I come in, morale shouldn't be so bad
that everyone is walking around on eggshells so as not to upset management
but knowing they won't make decent money at any similar
job, we all shouldn't be saying 'yes massa no massa" and that phrase didn't
come from me it came from Af-Am cow orkers.
There's more to life, isn't there?
Where? Where do I get the lucky I don't have to work agenda? DId I miss a memo? Did I hold my head wrong?
Seriously, I'm so tired of it. :(
Thats EXACTLY where I was for about 5 years at my previous job.
I gotta say things financially SUCK for me right now,
but NOT having to deal with that A-HOLE anymore is
Priceless.
I eat better, I feel better. I sleep better, I don't feel sick when I wake up every Sunday
because I know in 24 hours I'll be dealing with that BS. nope not me - not anymore.
I'm still looking for that happy medium...
Wow. You just described someone in my life (again, have to be so very careful with details) who lost her job...clear out of the blue. She was devastated.
But...she's happy again. She, also, doesn't get that burning sick pain in her stomach on Sunday anymore.
There has to be a happy medium, right? She's lucky in that she's not doing this by herself. You are. I am. I'm terrified of losing my job yet it almsot seems a relief. So I'd cash in my retirement and lose a bunch of it but there's enough there I could follow my bliss. For a while.
I do wish you luck, classic.
Infi, resend the original email as per limey, then mention that some of the figures have changed and you are working on that right now to give them an even more up-to-date version.
I've almost nailed down the numbers (running reports takes time, too) but I needed to send another transmission today. I told my boss what I was working on, mentioning the old email, and let her know I'd have the numbers tomorrow when I get there (picking up car in a.m. and I'm on late shift so I don't need to be there until ten but I will probably just go in at nine.)
Tomorrow I will have the new numbers and a new email. My boss tends to stick up for me (mostly because if I were gone she'd have an even huger work load) but I doubt at the expense of 'herself.'
So I have to cover my ass, as limey said. I hate having to CMA. It seems like such a childish thing to have to do.
Thanks
I've been working PT for a friend (temporary situation) for less than what unemployment pays.
He is paying me more than the going rate because I have previous experience in his industry.
I can't afford to pay my bills this way either. :(
I'm doing manual labor. Not exactly what I thought I'd be doing with my life right now,
but at least I'm doing something. He's happy because I'm actually good at it.
Its nice to get up and work and be appreciated by not only my boss, but also the clients. That feels good.
That wasn't harsh, honey, that was the fucking sugar-coated version.
Well, I think you can say things that people need to hear without making them feel worse about themselves.
If that was sugar coated, I doubt anyone would benefit from your alternative version.
I'm doing manual labor.
Isn't he the president of Mexico?
no - Thats Emanuelle Labor'
I sent the email. Actually, resent the one from Mar 02, with the updated spreadsheet and a new message.
Even the spreadsheet has the original date and is named "updated 0320."
We'll see.
Sigh...
Sounds bloody miserable, Infi. I totally sympathise.
Sundae - I reckon you've had enough time to bitch and moan about this problem. Maybe it's time to get the shit off the liver and say what you need to say to the relevant people, then get on with the job of helping your niece. She's going to need your love and support a lot more than your resentment, and although it doesn't happen often, I tend to agree with monsters post above even if it does sound a bit harsh.
I am done "bitching and moaning". In fact if Monster hadn't posted something I felt warranted an acknowledgement and furth explanation I would have written even less.
I doubt they want my love or support, but it will be on offer anyway.
I sent the email. Actually, resent the one from Mar 02, with the updated spreadsheet and a new message.
Even the spreadsheet has the original date and is named "updated 0320."
We'll see.
Sigh...
What do you resent?
Oh, you resent it? Was it recent, the one you resent?
Sorry. Typo. I meant "reazent" which means "to smack a smartass in the face, with gusto." ;)
...
I doubt they want my love or support, but it will be on offer anyway.
Of course they do, you silly numpty!
Sorry Sundae. xx
I agree with limey above though.
The job I was supposed to start this week fell through. Next time, I think I will keep my lip zipped until I'm at least a full week in. :cry:
Sundae, you will be invaluable to your niece. Do what you do best. Offer your shopping services. With her money for what she wants, getting the best deals as you know how. Shopping is one of the hardest things to do with 3-month-olds. Encourage her to invite her friends around, and bake cakes for her to serve.
"Offer love and support"? Either you love and you are there for her or you are not. No-one else can dictate that, it cannot be "stopped", it's not something to be "offered", it is unconditional. That said, it may not be well received. tough cookies for them. You love her, you're going to be there for her. period.
Why do you not see her breastfeeding? This is such a money saver as well as best for the baby. Even if you are revolted by the idea, it's surely in her best interest to try, so maybe you can be supportive there -I suspect from what you are saying (although i could be extrapolating wildly) that the family is not going to be supportive on that.... maybe because she's still their little girl and they can't even think of her having boobs never mind using them? She's going to need a strong advocate if she's going to try.
The list is endless. But what she doesn't need is to feel antagonism within the family. If what you can help her with is contrary to what the rest of the family thinks is a good idea, you need to just separate/back off a little bit from the family rather than stay close and get stressed about it. IMO
Re breastfeeding - I am all for it. I worked for a midwife for three years, and we sold and rented expressers and pumps and all that jazz.
I'm working on the assumption that the rates are very low for teens, her Mum didn't breastfeed (she found the idea revolting) and it is a longer process than bottle feeding; having twins I think she might reject it out of hand as being too hard.
I have taken all advice from here on board. And I do intend to try to get closer to her.
Mum saw her last night at football. They didn't talk about it. My sis has still not told my brother. My BIL refused to enter the bar because the father was seen in there.
I'm not the only fruitloop in the family.
Anyway, I'll move this from the upset thread because I'm not.
Going to ask her when her scan is. She'll probably know the sex then (identical twins) so I can start looking for deals for her. I'm already on board re the pushchair. Not sure if she'll listen though. I'll be suggesting best advice for health and she might want to go for the once with the prettiest parasol. She wouldn't be the first :)
When you're finished with your niece you can come do all that for me. :) You can be the live in nanny too if you like. I can't pay you, but I'll be very grateful. ;)
I'll work for bed, board and beer.
Then again, you might find it cheaper to pay for a real duenna at that rate!
Next scan is tomorrow. She is having them every two weeks.
She was asked last time if she wanted to know the gender but declined, because the bf wasn't there. He'll be there tomorrow so I'll know by the end of the day.
I sent the email. Actually, resent the one from Mar 02, with the updated spreadsheet and a new message.
Even the spreadsheet has the original date and is named "updated 0320."
We'll see.
Sigh...
I can't even go into it. All I will say is that the bullshit goes on.
Now I need to throw up.
kthx
I'll come down there and kick some ass for you.
I'll kick it good.-_
You're not a quitter, IM.
You know, I just went out for a smoke and a young man walked by, kind of struttin' and grinnin'. He looked at me and said "I just passed my exam with an A!" Never met him before in my life.
Yeah, that's why I'm here. I gave him a "woot! That's awesome!"
You're right, I'm not a quitter. I'm just sick of the crap. I'm not alone: the other professional staff is feeling the same way.
I can picture you now. Jumping up on the front desk.
[ATTACH]37968[/ATTACH]
I might just quit.
you need to perpetrate some pranks.
serious
fill her umbrella up with hole puncher confetti. harmless, and fun!
Sons Spec Ed teacher is leaving next month. Totally pissed. Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck!
They have developed a fantastic relationship. Heck shes been more a mother than his bio-mom.
Got no idea who will be nor how he'll react to the new one.
Sorry classic. That sucks. Leaving mid-year is a big deal, is she pregnant or is there something else going on?
$$$$$$$$$
She is leaving to better provide for her family. I don't begrudge her that.
It just sucks that it will come at the expense of my sons last year.
There isn't anyone here to blame. I didn't intend it to come off that way.
That's a real bummer classic, but you never know. Maybe another teacher will come along who is even more wonderful.
It's possible. :) Try and be positive
Sorry to hear that man. Burnout rates are high is spec ed, its just very taxing. If we add that to the cultural disdain for teachers and the money issue it can be hard to keep them. Friend of a friend (physics/math) just quit mid-year of his 7th year in favor of an engineering offer. He was tired of the nonsense and more than doubled his income. I hope you get another good one.
I too am pissed off about work.
The teaching itself is very good.
The bureaucracy is a major PITA.
My boss is a complete #$%T.
I too am pissed off about work.
The teaching itself is very good.
The bureaucracy is a major PITA.
My boss is a complete #$%T.
I understand the "#" and the "%", and I googled the "$", but I can't figure out the "T".
Is it a pictograph, a very short acronym, or just a typo ?
:lol:
It's a rebus! (Darn, if HLJ had posted that I could have said It's a rebus, Jebus!)
Zen, thanks. I am not glad you have some of the same issues but I am glad I'm not the only one. Gee, Mrs Misery loves her some company, doesn't she? And by 'she' I mean 'me.' ;)
Thanks all. I spoke to her today at length about other things, yet she still hasn't let on that she is leaving.
I found out through other usually reliable sources.
I'm hoping they are somehow wrong, but ...
@griff - apparently she is staying in Spec Ed. I can see the reasons for burnout though.
There have been several others who have already left.
Spec Ed seems to be the forgotten aspect of teaching. They seem more overworked,
overloaded and underpaid than the others. :(
They seem more overworked,
overloaded and underpaid than the others.
It may be that they are paid from other funds (fed->state->county->district)
than the regular school budgets.
Partially, yes. Griff probably knows more. Perhaps he will elaborate. I'm interested to know.
I swear I think my bank is giving my debit card out to people. This is the second time since Nov that someone has emptied my checking account and now I have to wait 5-10 for a refund. GAAAAAAAAAAAAAH This is not a card I use ANYWHERE> It just comes with my checking account. I usually pay cash. No one can tell me why this is happening since I don't use or carry the card.
I especially liked when I reported the fraud that the person helping me at the end of the conversation told me to have a nice day... REALLY??!!! :mad:
Partially, yes. Griff probably knows more. Perhaps he will elaborate. I'm interested to know.
CBS News
February 11, 2011 12:26 PM
GOP Proposes Additional $26 Billion in Cuts for 2011
After an emergency meeting on Thursday night,
House Republicans have seemingly coalesced behind a plan to immediately cut
an additional $26 billion from the federal budget - pledging a return to the ambitious budget figure
outlined in the Republican "Pledge to America," and giving strength to a chorus of conservative voices in the GOP."
<snip>
"Our intent is to make deep but manageable cuts in nearly every area of government,
leaving no stone unturned and allowing no agency or program to be held sacred,"
said Rep. Harold Rogers, the Kentucky Republican who leads the House Appropriations Committee, in a statement.
<snip>
[COLOR="DarkRed"]According to the AP, Rogers warned on Wednesday
that the depth of such reductions could lead to layoffs in the FBI, harm to national air traffic control,
and deductions in funding for health research, special education,
and grants for low-income college students.[/COLOR]
"Our intent is to make deep but manageable cuts in nearly every area of government,
leaving no stone unturned and allowing no agency or program to be held sacred,"
I'm not entirely against this in theory.
Cutting waste is good. Cutting needed services is bad.
the depth of such reductions could lead to layoffs in the FBI,
good - thats a start.
harm to national air traffic control,
I'm sure he meant
MORE harm.
The guys repeatedly sleeping on the job seems potentially harmful to me. ;)
and deductions in funding for health research, special education,
and grants for low-income college students.
some good, some bad and some ugly...
I know I keep complaining about my job. I know I should be grateful to have one.
But here we go again. I HAD to put on my calendar once a week to check a certain year's balance for a certain program that I closed out a LONG TIME AGO. Zero balance.
Why do I have to keep checking? Well, today I came in and there is no longer a zero balance. Someone reported something. What? Why didn't I know? Why am I sitting here running reports to see if the new number matches our system? Why am I taking time to do this on a year that was actually completed? And why SHOULD I be spending my time reconciling another program because OUR system has serious failings in reporting to the feds...and I have to fix millions of dollars by hand. Student by student.
I want to throw my hands in the air. I feel like I'm being set up. And yes, I refuse to spend my life here just because everything is so poorly managed.
I'm sick of it. :(
Sorry.
I'm a woman of inaction. No, I'm a woman stuck.
No, I suck. No, it's not my fault. Yes, it's my fault. Failure. Complainer.
Loser.
Words.
They suck. You rock. Please take care to get this right in future.
Thanks.
So the guy who threatened us by phone (who admittted to anger due to PTSD from a stint in the service [have to always be vague} came in and since I was the one who took charge of the issue on Friday (while my boss slipped back into her doored, lockable office) the person waiting on me informed me. Said student also asked for a cow orker by name. Cow orker was like "what's going on?" and I once again went through the whole story, noting "you were not here when it transpired."
Seemingly all is OK at this point.
conversations involving security and managerial support will occur.
Meanwhile, awaiting a response as to the numbers discrepancy.
J's car is still within a few months and a few thousand miles of factory warranty, but for some reason $2K in clutch repair is simply not covered.
Is that because it's considered a wear part, like brake pads?
Don't know, I wasn't involved in the negotiations and don't know what is actually wrong.
but
i would hope a "wear part" would not cause $2K of "wear" at 93K miles
Well, that's about 2 cents per mile, which is less than I spend on tires.
Answer is yes, this is normal wear and tear
vacuum cleaner is dead. I've performed an autopsy and have discovered an overheated and burned out electrical connection on a circuit board. I will fix it tomorrow. I need to go to radio shack and buy some kind of connector that can be soldered to the circuit board in place of the one that is burned up. I will also need to find the matching connector for the wires that lead from the ac supply to the new connector.
*sigh*
We'll see how things go tomorrow.
Sure, want me to hold your beer while you test it? ;)
vacuum cleaner is dead. I've performed an autopsy and have discovered an overheated and burned out electrical connection on a circuit board. I will fix it tomorrow. I need to go to radio shack and buy some kind of connector that can be soldered to the circuit board in place of the one that is burned up. I will also need to find the matching connector for the wires that lead from the ac supply to the new connector.
*sigh*
We'll see how things go tomorrow.
Or you could go to the thrift store and get a different one for $10.
Pfft. That's girl talk.
Captain V, to the Vorkshop!
Or you could go to the thrift store and get a different one for $10.
The one I have now I got at Goodwill, and still bears the $24.99 price tag. It is a very capable machine and I'm happy to put a couple dollars into it since it's a known quantity unlike some other machine. I do keep my eye open for quality items in good condition during my regular visits to the local thrift shops.
Urgh.
Eavesdroppers hear no good of themselves.
I can't remember if I read that in Enid Blyton or CS Lewis, but it stuck with me.
Just heard some horrible things from Mum while she was talking on the phone to a friend.
I won't go into it, but there were lies, spin and some really quite appalling views.
Next time I will walk away, I promise.
vacuum cleaner is dead. I've performed an autopsy and have discovered an overheated and burned out electrical connection on a circuit board. I will fix it tomorrow. I need to go to radio shack and buy some kind of connector that can be soldered to the circuit board in place of the one that is burned up. I will also need to find the matching connector for the wires that lead from the ac supply to the new connector.
*sigh*
We'll see how things go tomorrow.
Sure, want me to hold your beer while you test it? ;)
Thanks man!
This is done.
Here's the pc board showing the failed connector.
[ATTACH]38162[/ATTACH]
A close up of the place where the wire overheated and melted.
[ATTACH]38163[/ATTACH]
This is the male side of the connector. Both wires look black at the end, but one started out white.
[ATTACH]38164[/ATTACH]
I couldn't find a Molex connector that matched my situation, so I made do with two separate connectors, each half occupied. I renewed the end of the existing wires with this segment of red and black wire, attached some suitable ends for the connector on the pc board and put it all back together.
[ATTACH]38165[/ATTACH]
Sadly, I had two screws left over. Probably the ones that secure the adapter plate ffs. Now I have to take it all apart again. :facepalm:
But it *DOES WORK*, I tested it and it works great. Total cost of supplies used: under two bucks.
I think I may have a slipped disc. I am hobbling about the place, occasionally getting stuck (particularly when i've had to lie down for a bit...getting back up is horrid) and unable to find a comfortable position. Am stood up typing this.
Am s'pposed to be going to Brighton on Wednesday to a conference...presenting Thursday morning...not sure I'll be ok for the 5 hour train journey.
Dana - get some pain meds!!!
Yeah. Had a phone consult with doc, and am waiting on a pick up of some super strength anti inflammatories.
I've had muscle spasms in my back muscles, excruciating, disabling. Anti-inflammatories and muscle relaxants did the trick for me. Good luck.
Being stuck living with a parent in my awful hometown. This place is sapping my life force.
Being stuck living with a parent in my awful hometown. This place is sapping my life force.
Is it the weather or the parent or a combination of the two?
Is it the weather or the parent or a combination of the two?
Neither.
...Not really sure what the weather has to do with anything?
I like my dad, but he's 61 and living with him is kind of making me be 61 as well.
And this town is just awful. There are no jobs here, and hopeless public transport makes it almost impossible to leave. My specific part of the town is the worst. I live in a suburb where there is nothing but houses for literally a mile in every direction. I also have an ongoing foot issue which prevent me from walking a long distance.
I effectively have no freedom and there is nothing in my life whatsoever apart from what I can do in my room; ie. internet, reading, vainly applying for jobs and funding for postgraduate study.
I feel like I'm trapped here wasting my life and I don't know how I'm going to get out.
I live in a suburb where there is nothing but houses for literally a mile in every direction.
:lol: Nothing but houses for
a whole mile?
Not to make light of your situation Blueflare, I know it must be very hard living without transportation. I would never be able to do it. Because suburbs are, like, the only thing most middle-class Americans even know--and they're frequently a lot bigger than a 2-mile diameter.
:lol: Nothing but houses for a whole mile?
Not to make light of your situation Blueflare, I know it must be very hard living without transportation. I would never be able to do it. Because suburbs are, like, the only thing most middle-class Americans even know--and they're frequently a lot bigger than a 2-mile diameter.
True, but cars are more affordable. Suburbs are really designed exclusively for people who have cars. If you don't, it's like a prison. :/
They're not really more affordable, they're just a higher priority.
I can't eee. i lost one set of newish lenses in the pool, the chlorine has totally fucked up my eyes after 5 solid hours in the pool, My eyes are too sore to put lenses in, i can't find glasses vaguely near the right prescription and my skin is burning. they need to fix the chemical levels in that pool...... :(
pls forgive typing more than usual, had to take lenses out.
oh and I have reading homework to do
Have you thought about getting prescription goggles?
[SIZE="7"]Have you thought about getting prescription goggles?[/SIZE]
FTFY
You can't wear goggles for lifeguard training, that's the problem.
I can see OK without the lenses -certainly well enough to rescue people, not well enough to drive, but they do help protect my eyes from the chlorine. No more, though. I lost one the first time I truly opened my eyes underwater and the second the second. astigmatism lenses are not cheap.
FTFY
you have no idea how much that is helping me tonight :lol: I have all my windows cranked up to granny-vision level. i just wish my eyes would calm down so i can put my lenses back in
I think a hawk killed the ducks we rescued. I shoud have had a cover over them.
Easter's still ahead of you. There will be more duckies. Get your cover ready now.
;)
[ATTACH]38187[/ATTACH]
Damn! Post orphaned!!
I'm crushed. Elizabeth, my 18 yoa daughter, dropped out of school with only 6 weeks left. She has missed a great deal of school due to illness and she found out she wasn't going to graduate. Trying times, but she has decided to take the GED rather than repeat the fall semester & graduate in Dec.
will she be able to graduate with her pals with this new plan?
I think a hawk killed the ducks we rescued. I shoud have had a cover over them.
should have put DucksNuts on the job then.....
now my gripe. i got fucked up pretty good last sunday in a "boating accident" damn near broke my tailbone again (would've been teh turd time) when the driver, not the captain, launched the boat over a huge wake on galveston bay. everyone was bounced off the boat floorboards. i'm jacked for a week at least.
Elizabeth wouldn't graduate with her friends if she repeated the next semester. I respect her decision, it just hurts because I wanted to see my baby in her cap & gown
will she graduate or at least walk with her pals and cap and gown with this new GED track?
eta: I know a GED is not graduating.
Big S, She should be able to "walk" with her class. The only difference being that when she gets her "diploma," inside it will instead be a congratulatory sheet from the school instead of an actual diploma.
Been there, done that - but for different reasons.
fuckingfuck.
in the space of five minutes I've smashed the tip of my left forefinger with my hammer and stabbed the center of my right middle finger with my awl. This costume has my blood, sweat and tears in it. And by tears I mean swear words. aaaauuugh.
YOU must Suffer for your art !!
or mebbe y'awl oughta be more careful.
You should meet my Dad BigV. lol
Lost my wedding ring in the night. :( No time to look for it beyong a quick search this morning. It has vanished. Gotta go to school now :( :( :cry:
What were you up to? Where were you? Did you lose a finger too??
Where was the last place you had your left hand? :eyebrow:
Hope you find it soon. My hub lost his in our cattle feed lot, we found it 2 years later.
Were you at a club or at home?When I used to be an exotic dancer, I had women occassionally lose their wedding rings in my thong.
Were you at a club or at home?When I used to be an exotic dancer, I had women occassionally lose their wedding rings in my thong.
Sarge - :love:
har. Beest found it while I was out. The constant wearing of glubs during first aid yesterday made my fingers swell and aggravated my eczema, so I took my rings off to see if I needed to apply steroid cream. Put them on the duvet cover. So tired.... forgot to put them back on, snuggled down in bed and head "ping" knew immediately what it was -a ring hitting the wall. engagement ring was still on the bed, but wedding ring gone. It is tiny and I was tired so decided to find it this morning. It just went further than I had time to search. yes, I have junk on the bedroom floor.
yes, I have junk on the bedroom floor.
But not in your trunk?
Glad you found it.
Belated condolences, Sarge.
I can understand why it would suck for you.
All I can say (with feeling) is at least she isn't pregnant. With twins.
I'm trying to get in gear for today. Walking on Easter Eggshells.
My BIL rarely talks to me anyway, regarding me as a cross between Germaine Greer and Russell Brand; equally mystified by my opinions and floored by some of the things that come out of my mouth.
But I've never had to watch what I say in front of him before. It's going to be a case of "don't mention the war!" Not upset about this - I stopped by to read not post. Just a little apprehensive.
<---- is in hot water again. fmr. one day i'll learn.
Damn ... what did you do this time?
same fuckin thing as last time.
great. now I'm upset and I don't remember why. thanks.
The plane or the woman?
Sorry, but I'm easily confused. ;)
alright. i drank and drove.
this is bad.
I don't know you well enough to chastise you like I would like to, it would just come off as some self righteous internet guy. I'm sorry man. I hope no one was hurt.
I don't know you well enough to chastise you like I would like to,
Oh I do , and I did !!!
Kick his fucking ass zippyt.
***
On a different note, my kidney stones are back. Last time... it hurt so bad, I thought I was gonna die and I was afraid I wouldn't.
My Dad swears by a teaspoon full of properly fermented apple cider vinegar each morning and night to dissolve those suckers.
plth...shame. :headshake:
What's upsetting me is my friend's dysfunctional family. My friend is almost 50 and has three kids of her own, daughter 25, son 16 and son 13. She also has been her niece's legal guardian and mother since she was about 3 after the death of her sister and brother in law. She also cares for her invalid father and has part time care of another nephew who's parents travel for work constantly.
Anyway, it all works pretty well most of the time except when Daughter Emma comes home again because she gets kicked out of her accommodation. The problem is, Emma is an alcoholic and causes all sorts of strife in the house from stealing and lying to just being plain abusive and ugly when she's drunk (which is most days). She's lovely when she's sober, but you have to get up pretty early to see that.
My friend has been battling breast cancer. she also has lupus and a couple of other health issues, so life for her is challenging enough. I try to support her as much as I can, and be supportive of the other kids when Emma is on a bender, but it's very difficult. Even the little I can do is not much, and nowhere near enough.
I'm not sure how else I can help other than to give the others kids and my friend a soft place to land when they need it.
Is there?
eta: Today I was at my friend's place, and Emma had been drinking all morning. Around lunch time, I had to go in an separate Emma and Casey (niece) because Emma was getting stuck into her and Casey was bawling her eyes out. By the end of it, I was in tears too. And what really shitted me off the most was that Casey's nana died only a couple of days ago and the funeral is tomorrow. I know alcoholics don't give a shit about stuff like that, but it's still heartbreaking to witness.
Ach damn, Ali, that sounds a mess. I doubt there is anything else you can do beyond the help you're already offering. Just be there as a breath of sanity in an otherwise fucked up situation. Everybody needs that.
Cyberhugs babe.
Thanks Dana. :) I'm feeling a bit better than I was when I typed this post after resolving another totally unrelated but stressful issue.
My Dad swears by a teaspoon full of properly fermented apple cider vinegar each morning and night to dissolve those suckers.
Do this, Big V. Except make it as much as a Tablespoon, if you can possibly stand it. It tastes like shit, but it
will help. Some people say mix it in water to dilute it, but I've found it's most effective to throw back the shot, then chase it with a spoonful of honey to soothe your throat.
Apple cider I have. In an upcoming DIY thread, I may regale you all with my hard cider efforts, properly fermented.
But I confess I do not know "properly fermented apple cider vinegar" is and it's the properly fermented part I don't get. Can I use the apple cider vinegar I have in my basement?
I will drink a glass of it morning and night if that's going to help. I'll drink it and be grateful.
This stuff. It will be stocked next to the regular white vinegars. Definitely will be sold at Whole Foods, Trader Joe's, anything of that ilk, and might even be sold at your regular grocery store.
do shots of it followed by a lil water. tsp's and tbs's are for lesser men.
As an aside - that stuff knocks the shit out of a stomachache too.
V, you can get apple cider vinegar that isn't fermented the right way or something. The good stuff will have a residue in the bottom. That's the stuff you want. Not the crystal clear pretty stuff next to the other fancy yum stuff. ;)
nb: the crystal clear stuff is a lot cheaper, but it's also sweeter. I use it when I make chutney.
do shots of it followed by a lil water. tsp's and tbs's are for lesser men.
As an aside - that stuff knocks the shit out of a stomachache too.
I think I've mentioned before, but they also make you throw back a shot's worth before a C-section too. Because numbing your lower half means your stomach sphincter is likely to relax, and the last thing they want you doing on the operating table is suddenly screaming that your esophagus is on fire with backflowing stomach acid.
Clodfobble, you may have mentioned it before, but it still doesn't make any sense. Why does drinking a shot of acid (acetic) do anything like what you describe? More acid on stomach acid equals Huh?
Because the acid bonds with Hydrogen ions in the stomach, and by pulling them out makes the remaining bodily fluids less acidic. It's called having an alkaline "ash" when an acidic food has a net alkalinizing result.
Mom's heart problem has been found to be an Aortic aneurysm. It is serious. She is waiting now to hear what the surgeons want to do next.
sorry UT and KK. thinking positive thoughts.
That's pretty bad UT. Might be bypass time?
I hope it all works out ok. xx
Fingers crossed for your mum, UT.
A diagnosis is a start Tony.
Much love to you and the KK.
I feel pretty ill. Sore throat, splitting headache, exhausted. Can't get anything done. Blergh.
I hope your mum will be okay, UT.
A messageboard friend of mine has a 17-year-old son with ulcerative colitis (no neurological symptoms.) He's been symptom-free for 4 years now with the same diet my kids are following.
The other night he picked up a bottle of Dasani water while they were out driving, and chugged half of it before noticing it tasted like soap. Then he doubled over in pain and nausea. They called Poison Control, who told them that they get calls like this on a fairly regular basis; the factory was most likely cleaning the lines and didn't get all the soap rinsed before starting to fill bottles again.
The cleaner is out of his system by now, but it's triggered a full-on flare and they expect it will take at least a month or two before it's healed again. In the meantime he's in too much pain to play sports for basically the rest of the school year.
I understand that it's not rational to hate the entire food manufacturing industry over rare events like this. But I do.
Mom's heart problem has been found to be an Aortic aneurysm. It is serious. She is waiting now to hear what the surgeons want to do next.
Hi UT.
I am hoping for the best like everyone else for your mom and for you and yours. I don't know about your case "It is serious" but I will tell you my Dad had an aortic aneurysm, about seven centimeters. I was quite alarmed, but it didn't kill him (he died from other causes). The diagnosis in his case was watchful waiting, to my very limited understanding, in order to measure the rate of growth of the aneurysm. Based on that information, decisions as to what to do next could be made.
It sounds and sounded scary as hell, and it is serious. I'm glad everyone's aware of it, that's the best possible situation. What happens after that is decided on a case by case basis. Good luck to her. Hang in there man.
Thank you sir. I read all about it and there are several different kinds. Hers is 6.1cm, but it all depends on where it is. If it's on the ascending part of the aorta, which I think it is, that is indicated to require fixing.
We are all (still) waiting for the cardiac surgeon consult, but I think they are keeping her in hospital during this period for a reason.
You and yours are in my thoughts, UT.
Just as I hit send, the news comes in, it is in fact a thoracic ascending, for which 5.5cm is the level at which they operate.
Now I think we are just waiting for a schedule and how much planning can happen before the operation.
Oh, UT! My thoughts are with you! Sending healing vibes...
Sent by thought transference
Best wishes to you and your family, UT. Keep us updated.
You'll all be in my thoughts UT. xx
I guess this is the thread it's settled in...
News is that the location of the aneurysm is in a place where they need a really top surgeon as her current hospital doesn't have anyone who's worked on this particular variety of problem. She is getting an appointment at U of Penn where the really top doctors are.
We are kind of in shock.
I'm sorry UT.
At least they are taking it seriously and taking appropriate steps. Realizing they are in over their heads and bumping it up the ladder.
Youre in my thoughts and prayers.
UPenn is fantastic. She'll be getting the best care available.
Hoping & praying for your mom.
Best of Luck UT's Mom !!!
Sunday, Hows Pops ???
Sunday, Hows Pops ???
He went to the Doctors today. They've changed his blood pressure medication.
Also confirmed that the trouble he is having with his leg is not a pulled muscle acquired when he fainted, but an inflammation of his cyst. Strong painkillers, but no anti-inflammatory this time.
Mum is very anxious about how cold he is all the time (especially his hands) but she didn't mention anything about this when she got home. Perhaps the change in medication will help.
Dad's ambulatory; they went groceryshopping after his appointment. I think we're just becoming aware of the fact he is 72 in May and little blips can become roadbumps very quickly.
UT - I understand how you feel. Love to KK.
Prayers and good vibes to UT and Sundae. Sickness sucks.
UPenn is fantastic. She'll be getting the best care available.
Hoping & praying for your mom.
This.
I think we're just becoming aware of the fact he is 72 in May and little blips can become roadbumps very quickly.
That is a difficult realization. Sorry Sundae.
Prayers and good vibes to UT and Sundae. Sickness sucks.
Same from me.
Mom's heart problem has been found to be an Aortic aneurysm. It is serious. She is waiting now to hear what the surgeons want to do next.
Wow, just seeing this. We'll be thinking of you. I'm glad she was able to get in to see somebody at HUP.
Urgh.
First Dad, then me (steroids & chest xray) and now Uncle Jimmy.
He was rushed into hospital to have his gallbladder removed.
Mum called Auntie Glenys this morning (this evening in Oz) to wish them Happy Anniversary! only to find her alone and worrying.
She'd been with Jim earlier and he was all prepped but it was getting late for him to be taken down to surgery. She thinks it won't be until tomorrow (their time) now.
He works as a Carer for an agency, so lifting and moving patients after surgery might not be possible for a while. They're not all that well off, and this will make a difference.
Mum has something/ someone else to worry about.
So I let her get away with moaning about how my coughing woke her up.
She knows I can't help it, but having your big lump of a nearly 40 yo daughter around is hardly helped when she's waking you up every night/ morning. And not even having fun doing so.
We're all a bit fragile at the mo, regarding Abigail.
These minor instances and routine occurrences don't help.
I have lost my sparkly new lifeguard card before I even got it copied/scanned :cry:
I can't believe it.
Desk looked on the point of collapse, cleared everything in a hurry, hero beest fixed desk, when I started putting stuff back, card no longer with the paperwork it came with :( Or in the box of little bits and pieces of the desk :( I hope it didn't drift into the recycling
My 5 year old Boxer dog, Freya passed away yesterday at 2:45pm. 3 weeks ago we suspected boxer cardiomyopathy, 3 days ago the vet agreed with us. He gave us meds for her, and told us she would most likley die of a heart attack in a few months. She had several "fainting goat" spells over the past few days. She was coughing due to the fact her heart was enlarged, and was pushing on her trachea. Two nights ago she started to cough worse than before, and yesterday was a rattling cough and vomit. We knew it was time, and that our visiting vet had been wrong, we would indeed have to euthanize.
My husband and I took her to the vet, and they gave her a seditive to calm her, before they gave the injection.. I went out to do the paperwork and pay, so that when it was done, we could just leave. My husband came out of the room and said, "she's gone". The vet thought my husband was wrong (considering she had not given her the injection yet) and that Freya was just sleeping, but no, she went in my husbands arms, while I was doing the fucking finances! He says I would never have wanted to see that, and that she was not alone, but on top of losing our sweet baby it hurts just that little bit more.
Our 1 year old Boxer male is lost right now, he keeps checking the bedrooms, and when I fed him, he wimpered and would not eat. He kept looking to where Freya's bowl should be. I had to sit down where she would have been to get him to eat half of his breakfast.
The greif comes and goes in waves. We are all trying to be strong for each other, but its painful. Being a responsible caring, loving animal owner is very rewarding and sometimes it just plain sucks!
Freya had her name when we got her, and being names after the Goddess of love and beauty was perfect. She was such a sweet dog and will be very much missed.
Oh Jaydaan, I understand where you're at. Lost my own little wolf in December. I at least had the comfort of him having lived a full life. Five years old is unfair.
But the absence, and the wrenching grief I know. My heart goes out to you, all of you and the youngster who's left grieving too. He will settle, but it takes a while. Bit like us it comes in waves, usually at times they would normally be doing things together or greeting each other.
*hugs*
Rest well, little Freya.
I never feel like I'm good enough for, well, anything. Most of what I do is wrong, or inadequate. I'm surrounded by shining stars and I feel more like a burden than anything. I keep trying to be better but I don't really know if I need to be better. Why can't I accept myself the way I am? I expect others to. Or rather I want them to but I suspect they want me to be a better person too. A whole life spent wondering how I can be more normal. Is it even worth it?
You don't have to prove anything to anyone. You're absolutely good enough.
Jaydaan, so sorry. All the boxers I've met have been so sweet. I feel that particular pain and though it does get better it hurts terribly. My thoughts are with you.
Jaydaan, I'm very sorry to hear your sad news, so sorry.
...
The greif comes and goes in waves. We are all trying to be strong for each other, but its painful. Being a responsible caring, loving animal owner is very rewarding and sometimes it just plain sucks!
Freya had her name when we got her, and being names after the Goddess of love and beauty was perfect. She was such a sweet dog and will be very much missed.
You'll have this always, the waves, the missing, but also her place in your family, always. But the waves will become smaller and less frequent while your memory of Freya will stay strong. I hope you and your family regain your strength as soon as you need to.
:comfort:
It's been 9 years since I lost Bo. Although there isn't any pain anymore, I still remember the shock of going through it. It's really tough to lose a beloved pet. I'm sorry for your loss Jaydaan... :(
Anon, it is worth it. You already know the solution,
Why can't I accept myself the way I am?
it's just hard to put solutions into practice. It's hard for everyone to do it. I swear to you, like 95% of the world is playing "fake it 'til you make it."
Everyone here accepts you the way you are.
I'm sorry Jaydaan :( :comfort:
Anon, it is worth it. You already know the solution,
it's just hard to put solutions into practice. It's hard for everyone to do it. I swear to you, like 95% of the world is playing "fake it 'til you make it."
Everyone here accepts you the way you are.
Anonymous, Clodfobble's right. It's not an easy solution, but it is an effective one. Happily (or helpfully, to me anyhow), I only have to do what you yourself have already suggested, and suggested to others one time. Just accept yourself, just once. Then you're good to go. Really. Until the next time you have such doubts again, of course. But look, you already got through last time, just do it again, build on your success. Just accept yourself. At least accept that this is the way we all work. That's real too.
If you're dissatisfied about something specific and finite, work out a plan to change it. Being unhappy with "the way you are" might be true, but it's unfixable, not to mention unfair and probably untrue when unpacked. Would you say that to someone else? "I just don't like the way you are." with no details, no specifics? Just a general and all encompassing disdain? No. You deserve the same respect that other person gets from you, show yourself some of that respect. It helps to give yourself some slack too.
Jaydaan - I am so sorry. It hurts so much to lose such a well-loved family member, too soon!
Anonymous - BigV and Clod are right. We're all faking it at one point or another. Also, what BigV says about such a sweeping statement - you wouldn't be that unkind to anyone else, why are you being so harsh on yourself?
In my head it isn't general. It's about most everything I say and do. Was that right. Should I have done this? Why can't I do that instead? I guess that is general too. I can feel good from time to time but something I do, or experience, reminds me I'm barely a living being.I think about giving up sometimes but as easy as it is to hurt myself I could never hurt those around me. Id rather take all the pain from them, not cause it. Again, I feel like a burden. Then ther is guilt for that, too.
Meanwhile the world doesn't really understand it, and I am an oddity who should just get my shit together. Except here, where you have read my words and seem to understand. Thank you for this outlet. Thank you for caring.
You're welcome.
We're not exceptional, this outlet, these people who care. There are people everywhere who care, even around you. Honest, look at yourself. You're a caring person right where you are. You've seen some care from us because you spoke up. You care for people around you when you hear of something that needs to be taken care of. I would respectfully and gently suggest that there are others around you that can care for you too, if only they knew of your need.
You have to ask for what you need, ask for what you want. Let it flow both directions. Help, concern, support, it's out there. You're living proof.
JFC.
I'm babysitting Tucker Mojo, BD's BD (beloved dog). He's a darling lovable animal, but omg, I don't know what she's feeding him but he turns it to gas. :retch: vile, silent, frequent, poisonous gas. Jebus Tucker! just... ask me I'll take you outside for pity's sake.
Funnel. Hose. Bottle. Burn. Energy. OPEC be damned!
Batted a thousand yesterday: one friend accused me of being an elitist because I have a college degree and a decent job. Who knew I was the one percent? Another friend implied the other end of the spectrum. I won't be less so they can feel like more, and honestly, just being me is taxing so I also won't rise to whatever 'more' the other side thinks I should be. Why do people fight to try to control my self-esteem?
Because it's easier and less onerous than dealing with their own?
I think so. Friend thinks there is something wrong with living alone (I should be married like her, only her sixth) and had,, earlier that night, told me I could lie about my income and get free phones. I wouldn't do that, I said. Their tv was on, stolen cable. They owe me 2 grand for his teeth. So I am somehow priveleged. (That isn't spelled right, is it?) Anyway, it was a real slap in the face. I told her 'hey, I love you but I'm not going to listen to this right now' and I left. I'm wondering now if I ever will listen again.
Ffs. People should just butt the fuck out.
I don't get how she got to you being elitist...or was that because you're so wealthy you can turn your nose up at free/stolen/defrauded stuff?
Darling, I have been accused of being posh and brainy pretty much since I left school.
Having been out in the wider world I have been in situations where I've felt common as muck and thick as pigshit compared to the people I am talking to.
Inside my head I do judge other people (colleague who bought her 14 yo daughter cigarettes because "She'd pinch mine otherwise")
But I've never been rude enough to bring it up in conversation. And on many, many occasions I've understood that other people have great family values, morals, relationships. Just because they weren't the ones I was brought up with, doesn't make them wrong.
People who make snap judgements and tell you about them have no class.
And by class I don't mean knowing what knife to use - anyone can learn that. I mean good manners and common sense.
I cheated at life by having non-college degreed parents who said there children absolutely would go to college. And by starting out at min wage at my former job at the college and working my way up, I guess. She never said 'elitist' but privileged did come up. I really don't put on airs, ffs, I can barely stand myself! ;)
That's why it is bothering so me so much I suppose.
Sundae: I hear ya. Soetimes at work I feel like a country bumpkin. When I hang out with them I just feel like me...never knew there was resentment.
Oh hell yeah. Caught between the devil and the deep blue sea.
I am generally either hyper conscious of my 'rough edges' or flailing around trying not to sound like some bookish posh bird depending who I am with. Purely because of how people have responded to me at various times.
I've had the piss taken out of me for being a bit rough and northern, and I've had the piss taken out of me (and resentments shown) for being 'posh' 'stuck-up' and 'thinks she's so clever' etc. I've felt like a lump of grit in a tray of diamonds, and I've felt like an out of touch middle class tourist. Sometimes in the same day.
Swings and roundabouts
[eta] Can see how it'd be a downer to get that from a friend though. And to suddenly find out there's resentment there for nothing you've actually done, but their warped view of who you are.
Can see how it'd be a downer to get that from a friend though. And to suddenly find out there's resentment there for nothing you've actually done, but their warped view of who you are.
That sounds like Their problem to me ,
Joke em if they cant take a fuck !!!
I'm with zip - fuggem'
Dunno the whole back-story, but sounds like you need fewer "friends' like that.
ETA - get yer $$$$ back first ;)
*coughs* fewer *coughs*
:p
Yeah, I'm with the blokes here.
If a so called friend said those sorts of things to me they'd be off my Christmas card list faster than Griff (although he's back on now, so we'll see how that goes hehe), but seriously, you just wouldn't say that to a friend imo, even if you did think it sometimes, and if you did think it, then maybe you don't know your friend well enough to be calling them friend in the first place. What I mean is that if you think badly of your friends about things like that, then maybe they shouldn't be considered a friend. Rather, just an acquaintance.
Additionally, what does it matter if someone is more or less educated anyway? Or has more or less money or debt? Those aren't the bits that make up a person other than to show their ability to manage their finances, which really shouldn't be much of an issue to a friendship.
Dump their arses if they want to be so petty. That's what I think.
Infi -fwiw- remember the "friend" I told you about -the one who didn't want me to get Hebe the tech suit and generally poo-poos anything about my life that is different from hers (better or worse) -the one I didn't tell about training to be a lifeguard because I knew she'd be arsey about it and I was already nervous enough? Same deal, I reckon. It's just their way of dealing with envy and their own self esteem issues.
Something the swim coach said the other day when we were all Polo Moms together in the coffee shop between tournament games (she heard it on NPR or something)....... friendship becomes so much easier when you realize that not all friendships are forever. Some are for life, some for a generation and some for just a season. It's OK to drift away, even after years, and better to do that and accept it than fake it until you can't stand each other any more/come to blows. Maybe it's time to let them and the $2K go -you know you are never going to see that again.
Yeah.. #$%& 'em.
If everyone you know is much the same as you, you lead a sadly narrow life.
Considered amongst the academic and teaching professionals I am friends with, I'm a half-arsed slacker with average talent, but pretty good at getting practical things done.
Then I go to a hippie festival and I look like some conservative sellout abstract intellectual who can't even refuel a generator or colour co-ordinate his chakras.
It's good to mix with a wide variety of people. If someone cannot accept that you are different from them, they have a problem, not you.
#$%& em.
They owe me 2 grand for his teeth.
Make no mistake, this is where it's coming from. People are strangely resentful to those they owe money to. There's no good reason for it, and I think people are even generally unaware they're doing it. I guess it's because, underneath, the loan is subtly reminding them they are losers.
Is it refreshing to work in the pawn shop where the resentment is all out in the open?
Some of the store atmosphere is loan based but most of it is open racism.
Nothing like poverty and social distress to ramp up the old racism.
You guys are great, and have really been helpful. Thank you.
Monster, I do remember that and this is that friend I told you about. I think this friendship has beenin trouble for a long time. We just have had so many great times. But really, based on what? I thought it was based on mutual acceptance for who we are. And we've fought and made up, like good friends sometimes do, but I don't know about this time. However, I am forgiving to a fault...but do I want this friendship that I'm not sure is even healthy anymore?
I've let good people fade from my life, never thinking I was good enough I think and hence avoiding the anxiety of the social interaction. This person wouldn't let me do that. She's very determined. And as a sometimes reclusive lonely person sometimes I needed that persistence to force me out of the shell.
So I'm sad. I don't know if we'll talk this one out or not but it seems those underlying 'ideals' may be the end of it. The shit of it is, I'm sure she has no idea how deeply she cut...and may think I'm so damn charmed I will just rise above like us privileged are wont to do.
My auntie Jaqs, Ma's sister, is convinced that ma lives a charmed life.
Any lucky escape mum has, a fall that was nearly a bad one, or a near miss in the car, she says...told you, there's someone up there looking out for you. According to jaqs, it always works out ok for Mum. She seems, in her view, to skate above life's hurdles and troubles. And Jaq's is a little jealous of Ma's life.
Not quite sure how she reached this conclusion. Where this onlooking protector was when Mum fell down her stairs and broke her ankle, or when her marriage hit the rocks and she was depressed, or the years spent coping with my severe childhood illnesses, I don't know. She's had her share of ups and downs like anyone else. Lost a house to bankruptcy, lost loved ones, a miscarriage, a career destroyed by major back injury, etc etc.
But Mum has the skill of being relatively contented. Sure, she gets down at times. I've known her be depressed, occasionally for an extended period. But overall, she knows how to see the good in her life and knows how to take her happiness where she can.
Where it comes from, i think, is that Mum isn't constantly in a state of family crisis. She's built strong and supportive relationships with her children. She remained very good friends with her ex-husband after they'd divorced. People around her come to her aid if she's having problems.
But that's all stuff she built. And she built it with as many tears as anybody else.
Somehow though, Jaqs sees this as a charmed existence, protected in some way from the worst sufferings of life. Because...Jaqs didn't build those close supportive relationships with her children and then their partners. Her divorces weren't amicable, and the one that generally steps up to help when she's in trouble is Mum.
*shrugs*
It's all about perspective and where you sit.
My brothers have wonderful lives. I know exactly what trials and tribulations my older brother went through to be where he is now. My younger brother does 'seem' to have some charm on his side but a lot of that is them making good decisions and being wonderful people. I wouldn't want anything less, not one iota, because I love him and his successes and happiness make me very happy.
And thinking about this, about what's really important in life, has made me happy. Now I'm in the wrong thread. :)
You know what I went through a couple years ago and how its changed my life - forever.
Its also altered my perspective on things - one of which being the term "friends."
From what I've read here, this is exactly the type of "friend" you don't need in your life.
I had what I thought were many friends before. I have many now. They're just different people now.
Those who weren't there or were spreading rumors or only there when it was easy ..... OUT! I fired them all.
Some new and amazingly kind, generous and wonderful people came into our lives since that time as well.
They are the people I consider friends now. The others? I couldn't be bothered even thinking about anymore.
They just continued with their lives when we didn't have the same (insert money, time, help.. here) to offer them.
When we were in need they became too busy or couldn't be bothered to help.
Life is different now and the people I consider friends have enriched mine in ways I would have NEVER anticipated.
I really don't miss the others. I didn't expect that to happen.
Oops - go happy! (was composing while you posted)
never mind
No it is good! I need to spend more time with my friend I used to work with who is now at another college too. She, and her b/f, and her family, and her other friends...good people, all.
I love it! You know, my mom got me one of those stuffed glow worms whose face lit up when you squeezed it, when I was in colllege! Haahhaaa! I can't tell you how many times girls on my floor would ask if they could keep him for a time when they were upset about something: it was strangely comforting. I still have it.
Thanks. :)
Friend's mom died. Not unexpected, but she is a little heartbroken.
Ach damn:( sorry for your friend Monster. Never easy to see a mate go through it.
Friend's mom died. Not unexpected, but she is a little heartbroken.
"Funeral service Tuesday instate 9:30 a.m. with mass at 10:00 a.m. "
instate 9:30 -what does this mean? Is it like a pre-service visitation?
Wow. Not to ignore you monster - i am sorry for your loss - but
just wow. Who knew thst IM and me are the very same person?
I've been in CBT since the cancer - what? Four years now? And still
it's a struggle. But worth it. Worth it.
I wishi could be more fluent here - damn this point and type thing!
drives me nuts and clogs my thought process but i just want
you all to know Esp. Mtp and IM how much you both have helped
me todsy. Hugs.
I am thankful for my real-life friends who schooled me on what I should do. Turns out the appropriate thing is to go to the visitation and skip the funeral. Because this is a full-on Catholic do. Visitation is about showing your support for the family of the deceased, funeral is for those who really knew the deceased. Or so they tell me. So that's what I'll do.
That's true, monster. If it's someone I knew really well I will also attend the funeral, or instead of the visitation.
in state just means a 'viewing' as far as I can see.
(I hope you don't mind some levity: the first visitation my youngest niece went to really confused her. She tells us later "we went to visit him and he was already dead!)
So sorry for the loss of your friend's mother. :(
Wow. Not to ignore you monster - i am sorry for your loss - but
just wow. Who knew thst IM and me are the very same person?
I've been in CBT since the cancer - what? Four years now? And still
it's a struggle. But worth it. Worth it.
I wishi could be more fluent here - damn this point and type thing!
drives me nuts and clogs my thought process but i just want
you all to know Esp. Mtp and IM how much you both have helped
me todsy. Hugs.
Can you recommend someone for CBT? I've looked for someone who also takes my insurance...PM me if you can.
:hugs:
I am thankful for my real-life friends who schooled me on what I should do. Turns out the appropriate thing is to go to the visitation and skip the funeral. Because this is a full-on Catholic do. Visitation is about showing your support for the family of the deceased, funeral is for those who really knew the deceased. Or so they tell me. So that's what I'll do.
Firstly, my sympathy to you.
As you know, we don't do the visitation thing here (open casket?)
I only know how to do the Catholic thing, which would be for anyone and everyone to go to the full-on Mass. People who simply attend the same church do that here, even if they only nodded to them across the aisle once, even people they knew years ago who saw the obituary in the Bucks Herald. Mum took me to a number of funeral Masses when Grandad was very ill. Shopping for ideas. The only real rule is to give up your seat if it ends up being standing room only and you
know you were only a random acquaintance. Otherwise the more the merrier - better people who came in out of the rain than a poor send-off.
And everyone and anyone is welcome back to the house (or hall) afterwards. If you don't have a good reason
not to attend, and don't, it's considered mildly rude - on a par with calling a new partner by an ex's name, say.
It's attending the graveside that's considered close friends and family only.
It's a terrible faux pas to intrude there.
Glad you got the right advice from the locals.
Turns out funerals are more cultural than religious in many ways.
Another friend confirmed visitation was the thing. I went, she was surprised and pleased to see me (it was a good 40 minute drive and she knows I think American funerals and funerals in general are a palaver). The poor woman is stuck there for SEVEN HOURS, forced to watch people pray by and kiss an embalmed made-up corpse that looks nothing like her mom :cry: (My friend is not religious)
The unfortunate tendency of some (perhaps, many; perhaps most) to treat strangers with more kindness, civility, care, than a friend or loved family member.
Familiarity, it seems, indeed breeds a kind of contempt.
Sometimes it's justified though.
"Strangers are nicer to me than you are!"
"That's because strangers have no idea what a bitch you are."
I can still clearly hear the sound of my heart breaking when I was told by the person who was supposed to love me more than anyone else on earth that "People like you because they don't really know you. If they really knew you they would hate you."
It changed me, and not in a good way.
Did you tell this person to go fuck him- or her-self?
Probably. I probably got knocked around because of it. Maybe just some more verbal abuse. It's a time dead and gone but those words never leave my head.
The saying 'we always hurt the one we love' is a buncha crap. We should cherish the ones we love.
Is it cuz they're more likely to stick around anyways?
For the record, I'm not talking about family members. I firmly believe that your family is the only one you ever get, and deliberate cruelty is never justified. I guess I've just been in too many situations where other people felt I owed them something based on completely imaginary relationships between us. I would think you, henry, of all people, would be of the mindset that no one owes anyone anything.
Anyway, sorry. It's been a rough couple of weeks. I need to just shut up now.
Probably. And: because one sticks around, one becomes taken for granted, and, with that, the inhibitions of the other fall and shit is sometimes heaped up.
Clod is, of course, right: sometimes it's justified...'course sometimes bashing a head in is justified...the exception is not the baseline.
And, with this topic, the baseline is, again, 'The unfortunate tendency of some (perhaps, many; perhaps most) to treat strangers with more kindness, civility, care, than a friend or loved family member.'
*shrug*
'nuff said.
This is fact.
I don't owe kindness, but am inclined to give it freely to the one(s) I love.
Irksome, therefore, when I witness one who professes love for another treat the other as burden, as enemy, as target.
There is an insanity at work in such a scheme.
I can still clearly hear the sound of my heart breaking when I was told by the person who was supposed to love me more than anyone else on earth that "People like you because they don't really know you. If they really knew you they would hate you."
It changed me, and not in a good way.
That's too bad. Clearly the person saying it was trying to hurt you and it speaks only of them and not at all of you. It's easy for me to say this, but you should let it go. It's untrue. It's not a valid piece of information that you should allow into your head.
This is fact.
I don't owe kindness, but am inclined to give it freely to the one(s) I love.
Irksome, therefore, when I witness one who professes love for another treat the other as burden, as enemy, as target.
There is an insanity at work in such a scheme.
It's never pleasant to watch someone harm themself.
That's too bad. Clearly the person saying it was trying to hurt you and it speaks only of them and not at all of you. It's easy for me to say this, but you should let it go. It's untrue. It's not a valid piece of information that you should allow into your head.
This is what I wanted to say to anon. Thanks for putting it into words, Glatt.
And, with this topic, the baseline is, again, 'The unfortunate tendency of some (perhaps, many; perhaps most) to treat strangers with more kindness, civility, care, than a friend or loved family member.'
So true...so sad.
Anyways, I just balanced my checkbook. I am missing $1000. Really??? Crunched the numbers a couple of more times, the balance still came out wrong. Gotta go to the bank and clear this tomorrow. Man, this sucks. :thepain:
That sucks :(
It's good while since I had insomnia, it's a bastard when it strikes though.
Workplace bullies. Supervisor bullies.
Then there is another type of bully boss which most people would not even perceive as a bully. The “closet” bully boss is actually much more prevalent and more dangerous than the ranter or raver described above. This type of bully boss is very clever in their ability to hide their bullying behaviors and to manipulate the perception of bystanders against the “target”. Most bullies possess excellent emotional intelligence. The thing that needs to be kept in mind is that true “psycho bullies” are motivated in ways that normal people do not understand. Bullies use their emotional intelligence to cause conflict intentionally. They are not interested in building positive relationships, only ones they can manipulate. Much of their bullying behavior is premeditated. They do not possess empathy.
Closet bully bosses are often also “serial bullies” who choose one target at a time. One study showed that after successfully eliminating a target, they chose another target within two weeks. These bully bosses are capable of behaving normally towards all other subordinates and will even behave normally towards the target, whenever there are witnesses. This method serves the bully boss well, making it difficult for others to believe a target. Often, only the bully boss and the target know the true nature of the bully.
Simply stated, “targets” are good at their jobs and therefore cannot be taken down based on poor job performance. Therefore bullies rely on character assassination, twisted, half or outright lies, rumors and innuendo to subjugate or eliminate their target. Read my article “proud to be a target” to understand how bullies choose their targets.
At the beginning of a bullying campaign the target may actually feel favored by the bully boss. The bully boss often befriends their target at first. The target begins to trust the bully boss and may share information about their weaknesses that the bully boss then uses against the target. After the bully boss gains useful information about the target, the bully may try a few “pass-by nibbles” (read the article about pass-by nibbles, on this blog) to test the targets reaction. Then a full blown bullying campaign begins.
In my first emotional assault, my bully called me into a meeting with her and a Human Resource Rep to “discuss my needs”, only to reprimand me for “intimidation of subordinates”, a grossly twisted, half truth. My bully boss knows how strongly I feel about treating everyone, especially subordinates, respectfully. Knowing this about me, she knew it would be especially hurtful to accuse me of just that. It upset me horribly and I couldn’t stop crying at my desk for most of that day.
This reprimand happened behind closed doors. I was warned not to discuss it with coworkers. My coworkers didn’t hear my boss’s lies or hear her calling me a liar. They didn’t see her disrespect me as she rolled her eyes and clicked her tongue at my responses. They only knew I was reprimanded so severely I cried all day. Bullies delight in observing the pain and chaos they have caused and marvel at their ability to get away with it. Next comes the “mental health card”.
After the Bully boss’s first emotional assault the target reacts emotionally as I did. The bully boss then manipulates the target’s coworkers into feeling privileged to be in her confidence. The bully then feigning concern for the target tells of half or twisted truths, placing the targets mental health, competence and/or loyalty into question. It is often what the bully doesn’t say that causes the most damage. For example: The bully boss brings coworkers into her privileged confidence. The bully then cites a half or twisted truths about the target or will imply that the target caused the bully some kind of deep hurt. The bully then mimicking deep hurt or confidentiality concerns, refuses to share details, leaving everything to the imagination. It must be remembered that they are “masters of deception” and can easily convince others of the target’s negative attributes and how the target has caused them personal concern or injury of some kind. They can be so convincing, some convince themselves into believing the lies that they themselves have fabricated.
Coworkers feeling privileged to be of assistance to their deeply hurt boss will do anything the bully boss asks. This is called “mobbing”.
A full blown bullying and mobbing campaign could be a very critical period for the target who has no understanding of the “bullying and mobbing phenomenon”. Targets who are typically good performers and well liked by coworkers are stunned by the first emotional assault, which is often the first reprimand in their careers. They become obsessed trying to understand why first their boss, then their coworkers turned against them, when there is no valid reason at all!
Suddenly the target’s world is a different place, for reasons they don’t understand. Most targets have enjoyed decades of appreciated successes on their jobs, only to be left in isolated despair. Most targets are forced out of their positions within two years of a bullying and mobbing campaign. Forced out by being fired, resigning, becoming ill, committing suicide or going postal!
All of this could be avoided if every working person had a knowledge of “workplace bullying and mobbing”. If this is the first time you have heard of it, learn more about it today. Who knows, you might be the serial bullys’ next target. Hopefully, someday, every working person will learn to Recognize it, Name it and End workplace bullying and mobbing together! ABC
http://antibullyingcrusador.wordpress.com/2008/04/06/tactics-of-a-workplace-serial-bully-boss/Oh anonymous! I really sympathise. I have suffered something very like this and it is truly awful. I left the company, but I did start tribunal proceedings for constructive dismissal and I am not allowed to reveal the outcome.
I feel vindicated, but it was so hard at the time. Legislation and working practices vary so I cannot offer you any advice, but you have my strongest sympathy.
Thank you. I've been reading various articles on it and it seems so clear now. The part about the target not being able to understand what just happened in their world, the part where bullies perceive the targets as a threat...
It's like another abusive relationship I was in. I was emotionally abused (along with physical which of course isn't at work) and manipulated. You start to believe there is something wrong with you. It's insidious. It's painful. I never thought it would happen here.
But it's happening. Grievances have been filed by others, very long-time employees who appear to be beaten down but are not. I can appear so too. I am prepared for anything but I won't go anywhere without first expressing what I'm seeing, what I'm hearing. I won't be bullied because they pay me to be. I know the tricks. Just like that relationship. I swore no one would treat me that way again. Not even for a paycheck. But it's on my terms. There will be no resignation from me, if it comes to that. I know my rights.
My favorite part is about how the targets just can't fathom the bully's way of thinking. That's where I'm at. How. Why? Of course, my need to understand the hearts/minds of others and belief that no one can be truly evil is what has made me a target in my personal life.
Thanks for the ear, limey.
Jeez, why do people do that to one another? :(
There's nothing I hate more than people who bully/badmouth a person when that person is clearly a decent individual who did nothing wrong, or at least, nothing to possibly deserve that kind of treatment.
You're welcome! If it helps, at the difficult times remember that I am rooting for you!
A new elementary school has been opened near us to serve a growing community of young families. Minifob's Kindergarten teacher told me that she will be transferring there next year (at her request, because her own neighborhood now feeds to this new school and she wants to teach where her kids are.) Well okay, it's not like Minifob could have her again, though I had been hoping that in another year Minifobette might be placed with her.
Then I found out that Minifobette's PPCD teacher is not coming back next year, because she has decided to stay home with her baby. This is a much greater blow, because she is amazing and there is a huge disparity among special ed preschool teachers. Some stories I've heard from moms at other schools, I'd sooner pull my kid out entirely than let her be in a classroom with these people. Plus, I had been relying on her for inside information each year to figure out which teacher would be the best one to place Minifob with, since we do have that right but it does me no good if I don't know the teachers.
Well, at least I'll still have our speech therapist, who has been working with my kids for as long as the PPCD teacher has. She is fantastic and never tries to use candy as a reinforcer.
Ha ha, joke's on me, turns out the speech therapist is going to the new elementary school too. Now there is no one in the building who has any experience with either of my kids. Next year was all settled, and now I'm terrified about it.
I'm guesing you can't transfer to the new school/would be too stressful if you could?
Ask for their recommendations before they go. Do you know/trust the principal/whoever makes the placement decisions?
Hector had a terrible KG year and a new teacher was coming -the teacher Hebe had moved to a different grade. The interim principal (really the media specialist) said "trust me" and I did because although I didn't know her that well, I knew she knew my kids. She put him with the new teacher, I was panicked.... best teacher EVER. Totally turned hector's elementary education experience around.
I might be fine. It really might.
Yeah, you never know Clod. The new teacher might be even better. Try not to stress too much. There'll be plenty of time for that if the new teacher is a piece of shyte.
Yeah, not allowed to transfer Minifobette, and wouldn't want to transfer Minifob. Supposedly his placement has already been agreed to for first grade, with a teacher we're confident about. Except it's more of a handshake thing, since they refuse to officially declare anything until they really do the rosters in August. And I forgot to mention that our principal is also going to the new school. Which is okay, I didn't really like her anyway, but there's no guarantee that the new principal will care about the old principal's promises.
It'll probably all work out fine. The new principal is male, and in my experience male principals are a lot nicer than female ones. And I'm crossing my fingers that the new PPCD teacher will be the maternity leave substitute that everyone liked so much. I'd be happy with her. Still, it's stress I totally didn't need right now.
It'll probably all work out fine.
I have no doubt it will, it's just a matter of how many heads you have to crack to get there. :D
Thank you for your interest in position 3836. As you may know, the competition is exceptionally strong for this position. While your background has many impressive aspects, we have selected candidates who more closely fit our current business needs.
We thank you for your interest and wish you success in your future career endeavors.
Sincerely,
Please do not reply to this email
Happy holiday ... sigh :(
Oh classic - that sux!
And MTP, so does that!
Hugs to you both!
Sorry, Classic, my visualisation powers seem to be unreliable lately.
:comfort: to MTP
thanks - The part that really got me was this:
Sincerely,
Please do not reply to this email
Seriously?!?!?!?!
That really sux classic. I'm sorry you had your hopes up and it's come to nothing. :(
Maybe the universe has something better in mind for you! xx
Bad luck, mate. Hard as it is, try not to be too disheartened about it. Competition for jobs is high. It's a numbers game more than anything. Keep applying and interviewing, and eventually one of them will hit.
*hugs* sucks though.
I am very upset today. I cried for most of it. And all around me people are having a great hokiday in great weather. I can't say why yet, I need to find some resolution for the situation before I can. But I am so miserable, hurt, pissed off, bemused and angry. Apparently when people say "how are you?" They don't really want to know unless you're ok.
I'm sorry, monster. I hope you feel better soon. I agree that "how are you" is almost never an actual question anymore. Around here people say it with a downward pitch inflection, like a statement, and don't even pause to hear a perfunctory "fine." It's equivalent to "good to see you."
Which is really frustrating when you are not well and wish you could tell someone about it.
I think most people expect you to say something positive or at least not negative, so it's usually fun when you go through the check out and the girl says, "Hi, how are you?" to then launch into just what sort of a shit day you've had and explain why your three year old will be lucky to see four, and how your teenagers are spawn of the devil, and your husband is a useless see you next tuesday sometimes and how the cats pissed on the mat AGAIN, and the dog keeps getting out even though the fence is fortified better than fort knox. [breath], and then you ask how the check out chick is and she looks at you like you're some kind of a crazy woman.
Yep, most people don't really care, so sometimes, it's good to make them realise that there's no point asking unless you really really want to know. ;)
I hope things get better for you monster. It sux when something really goes wrong. xx
I think most people expect you to say something positive or at least not negative, so it's usually fun when you go through the check out and the girl says, "Hi, how are you?" to then launch into just what sort of a shit day you've had and explain why your three year old will be lucky to see four, and how your teenagers are spawn of the devil, and your husband is a useless see you next tuesday sometimes and how the cats pissed on the mat AGAIN, and the dog keeps getting out even though the fence is fortified better than fort knox. [breath], and then you ask how the check out chick is and she looks at you like you're some kind of a crazy woman.
Yep, most people don't really care, so sometimes, it's good to make them realise that there's no point asking unless you really really want to know. ;)
I hope things get better for you monster. It sux when something really goes wrong. xx
Monster I am so sorry to see this. It's a bummer when people won't hear what you say, especially if they seemed to be interested ... Hugs from across the water for you.
Oh I was just being facetious with the last bit. It's hard to trot out the required "fine" when really you're not.
Into the lion's den this morning. Really I should just walk away at this point, but too many sacrifices have been made that can't be unmade, too many complex arrangements. I may be "throwing good money after bad". But I know that I will think less of myself if I just walk away, even though I shouldn't. For my kids, I will do it.
Does the NHS ignore everyone, or just me?
Got referred for an X-ray by the GP yesterday, was told the hospital would call yesterday or today... they did not.
I tried to call before 5 but they were busy and there was no way to leave a message or queue... so I called just after 5 and they were closed, of course.
Left them a message. Hope it made sense. Hope they damn well call me back tomorrow.
Meanwhile I'm being a total hypochondriac over here. I know it's irrational and I need to quit worrying, but it's hard. The human mind is geared to seek answers, and we find an extended period of simply not knowing tricky to accept. This is why we have religion, and this is why I have hypochondria. Blarg.
Edit: So I got a call back, awesome sauce. Got an appointment for Thursday. Will try to relax for now.
[COLOR="Purple"]AAAAAARRRRRRRRGH!!!!!![/COLOR]
[COLOR="Red"][SIZE="7"][FONT="Arial Black"]FUCK!!!![/FONT][/SIZE][/COLOR]
FUCK!!!!
__________________
OBAMA IN 2012
Fuckles. As a young friend of mine is wont to say ...
I don't know what we're all fucking about but allow me to add: fuckity fuck fuck!
don't know where the designated "mock the homophobes" thread is, so I post this here. I can't really mock the four year old singing it, I grieve for him. I mock the idiocy of the irresponsible adults around him.
It's pathetic, really, teaching hatred to children.
[YOUTUBE]iRNbC-aSFLc#![/YOUTUBE]
God, I feel slightly ill after watching that.
Canker sore
top *that* mothertrukkers!
Put some probiotics directly on it. Good ones, the refrigerated kind. Any regular pharmacy should have some behind the counter, possibly under the brand name Lactinex, but no prescription required in any case. Open the capsule or envelope and just pack the powder right on like a wad of chewing tobacco. It will taste like ass, but hold it there as long as you can. Canker sore will be gone within a day.
Umm. Okay, long time not been here. Just wondering ... where does integrity disappear and self-preservation take over? Been trying to negotiate a 'civil' divorce, only to see the soon-to-be-ex-spouse make $340,000 disappear. Nice magic trick. Does anyone ever successfully negotiate a civil divorce? Is there such a thing? I cringe at the prospect of lawyering up only 23 days from D-Day. Am I a hopeless, laughable idealist?
That's what's upsetting me today. :(
That sounds like a shitful situation ortho. Might be an idea to hire a lawyer AND an investigator if the spouse is doing dirty stuff.
I was trying to avoid lawyering up ... but when stb-ex pulls shit like this ... I feel like such an ass. D-day is July 6, and I was hoping we could get there and just divide everything equitably. It would've been worth it to avoid the legal acrimony. Now I just feel like a chump. Guess it's time to find a human pit-bull.
Umm. Okay, long time not been here. Just wondering ... where does integrity disappear and self-preservation take over? Been trying to negotiate a 'civil' divorce, only to see the soon-to-be-ex-spouse make $340,000 disappear. Nice magic trick. Does anyone ever successfully negotiate a civil divorce? Is there such a thing? I cringe at the prospect of lawyering up only 23 days from D-Day. Am I a hopeless, laughable idealist?
That's what's upsetting me today. :(
I don't know...I wonder too about integrity. My marriage was 'dissolved' (sounds like an Alka-Seltzer) and I basically took what was mine and left. I don't know what drives people to fight and take: certainly there was love there at one time and shouldn't that be respected? But something takes over, it seems. Revenge? Or friends saying "get ALL you can" as a couple of my friends suggested. It's such a hard thing to go through why do people make it harder? That's a part of human nature I don't get. And I find it's more often than not the fairer sex is playing the fairer sex card (helpless. helpless like a viper) and it seems to be almost expected.
So I DO get where you're coming from but have no advice, legal or otherwise, except keep your integrity and your idealism, but don't let yourself be a doormat.
I hope it gets better. Keep in touch.
I'm with infi, there. Unfortunately, you're not the first dwellar to have been surprised by their erstwhile spouse making off with the cash.
Narcissism is the big player in stb-ex's case. He sees nothing wrong with anything he does and is offended if others don't have absolute faith in his assertions and actions. (I'm the fairer sex part of this situation, actually.) So I fully expect him to claim everything's good and be angry if I don't continue to trust him (!). I was hoping to do this quickly and not go adversarial. I just want to get away, even if it means accepting a little less. But it looks like things'll go into the toilet.
ortho, looking at your usertitle and sig line I'm reminded of a little picture a cow orker gave to me. It's a frog with his hands behind his head, kicked back, and it's captioned: not a single fuck shall be given today. :)
Heh heh ... I like it! Maybe I'll change my sig line. I found the meme page for it ... too funny. I can use some right about now.
Put some probiotics directly on it. Good ones, the refrigerated kind. Any regular pharmacy should have some behind the counter, possibly under the brand name Lactinex, but no prescription required in any case. Open the capsule or envelope and just pack the powder right on like a wad of chewing tobacco. It will taste like ass, but hold it there as long as you can. Canker sore will be gone within a day.
Imma do this today. Thnx codfobble.
Our former cat, who is being fostered by our next door neighbor, is not doing well at all. He is entirely skin and bones. Our neighbors adopted a young male stray and after a long-ass time they finally fixed him. Now the young turk is constantly harassing the old cat and won't let him eat. He's starving and coming over to our house and staying outside in the rain because the young one won't let him in the house. Our neighbors are oblivious and unwilling to deal with the situation at all. Spouse person brought our old cat back into the house tonight. :(
I wish I had popped a cap in the stray's ass when he was still an unfixed stray.
Is it really too late for him to have a misadventure? I hold no love for my former cat, although I feel a bit of loyalty to him. The new cat is also an asshole.
I wouldn't really care except nuclear sentiment is for bringing the old cat back to our house. This might be the tipping point for me.
Find yourself a young stray who will harass your spouse and let neither old cat nor old spouse back into the house.
Beest likes roses. I've planted him roses. The yellow climbing rose at the back I planted a couple of years ago was just coming into its own this year, looking awesome with lots of blooms, and I somehow caught it in the lawnmower wheel and ripped it all to shreds as I was mowing before I left. I have come back from camp to find none of it survived :( I now he's trying to graft it back on, but there's a big empty gap opposite the pink climbing rose on the other side of the deck steps.
No, sexobon, I will not rip out the pink one to make the gap less obvious.
... No, sexobon, I will not rip out the pink one to make the gap less obvious.
Next time it won't be so easy ... :tinfoil:
Umm. Okay, long time not been here. Just wondering ... where does integrity disappear and self-preservation take over? Been trying to negotiate a 'civil' divorce, only to see the soon-to-be-ex-spouse make $340,000 disappear. Nice magic trick. Does anyone ever successfully negotiate a civil divorce? Is there such a thing? I cringe at the prospect of lawyering up only 23 days from D-Day. Am I a hopeless, laughable idealist?
That's what's upsetting me today. :(
Give it up. Get a lawyer or you will be buttfucked in court.
Umm. Okay, long time not been here. Just wondering ... where does integrity disappear and self-preservation take over? Been trying to negotiate a 'civil' divorce, only to see the soon-to-be-ex-spouse make $340,000 disappear. Nice magic trick. Does anyone ever successfully negotiate a civil divorce? Is there such a thing? I cringe at the prospect of lawyering up only 23 days from D-Day. Am I a hopeless, laughable idealist?
That's what's upsetting me today. :(
Hi orthodoc :)
We've discussed this question before. Here's a
link to a thread I created back in the day on the subject. It is a good thread, with lots of helpful comments by other posters. I didn't contribute much because at the time, my head was exploding along with my marriage. I faced the same confusing situation; I wanted my marriage to remain intact and I wanted my own life to remain intact. I wondered about how to reconcile my loyalty to my (former) spouse, her loyalty to me, and my reaction to the extreme measures she'd taken at the beginning of our divorce. It was terrible.
I don't like conflict. I find most conflict upsetting. I can't speak for your husband, and I've read your questions several times over and I'm still uncertain whose integrity is disappearing and whose self preservation is taking over. But regardless, I *do* know this: you can't control what the other person's doing or thinking. You can influence it, to some degree, but ... not much, really. What you can control (mostly) is your reaction, your response to the situation.
That's really good news and here's why. You have to live with yourself in the future. What you do now is what you'll have to look back on someday. Do the right thing, now, *for you*, and you will minimize the regrets you will face later. If being civil is very important to you, be civil. If having a fair financial settlement of your assets is important to you, work for that. If retaining possession of a particular object is important to you, secure it. Find out what is important to you, write it down. No, write them down. Then look at the list and identify which ones you can accomplish on your own and which ones require cooperation (or compulsion) of another person, likely your soon-to-be-ex-spouse. This list, it is probably not filled with mutually exclusive items. You can probably do many of them without having to sacrifice others. The ones you can do alone, do them. The ones that take two people, you need to have a plan how to get those done.
Just like any other group effort, how to reconcile competing agendas and motivations, how to engender a spirit of cooperation and civility, how to stay on target and reach your goals is a multi-faceted task. I can't advise you on how to do this. I would urge you to keep a couple things in mind as you work through this. Keep in mind your own worth. Keep in mind you need to take care of yourself, and that YOU are the primary person responsible for that and the person who has the most power to achieve this. Keep in mind the items on your list, and their relative priority. Keep in mind this is a long term process, months or years long for different aspects. Also keep in mind this whole process can easily bring out the worst in anyone, yourself included. Adjust accordingly for yourself and for the others.
Look after yourself. Be good to yourself. Be as good to others as you can be while caring for yourself too. Ask for help and support. You have a source of it here, but other friends and professionals (lawyers, etc) have their place. Don't be a hero. You have a long, (likely) crappy road ahead of you. Pace yourself.
Keep checking in, ok?
good luck with that orthodoc. i tried that civil thing and yeah, didn't work out so well. definitely get a lawyer.
my roommate right now is in surgery getting his spinal L1, 2 & 3 fused together right now. i'm going to be a nervous wreck all day.
Orthodoc, sorry to hear about your marriage. My opinion is that when a marriage gets to the point where divorce is inevitable, those formerly important ideals such as love, loyalty, fairness, and sacrifice are lost. However much you feel them yourself, and your soon-to-be-ex partner claims to still feel them, fact is, they probably mostly went out the door before divorce was even considered. So protect yourself and whatever remnants of the relationship are left, and get legal representation.
I thought my divorce was civil and fair. I did the paperwork myself, he agreed to everything, which was slanted in his favor to get him to agree to a speedy end. Now, 10 years later, turns out he has been verbally stabbing me in the back to our daughter for years. As a result, any semblance of a relationship I have with her is in shreds due to his incessant trash-talking about me combined with normal teenage angst. So yeah. At this point, I almost wish I'd taken him to the cleaners (or at least gotten what was due me) instead of trying to "play fair" or be nice. :mad2:
Our former cat, who is being fostered by our next door neighbor, is not doing well at all. He is entirely skin and bones.
He's starving and coming over to our house and staying outside in the rain because the young one won't let him in the house.
I wish I had popped a cap in the stray's ass when he was still an unfixed stray.
Is it really too late for him to have a misadventure?
I hold no love for my former cat, although I feel a bit of loyalty to him.
The new cat is also an asshole.
You gave a cat away to a neighbour, and admit you had no love for him.
You wish you'd killed another cat when it was convenient to do so.
I'm guessing you are not a cat person...?
So don't worry about it. The cat you disliked enough to abandon will starve to death, problem solved.
Your spouse might feel differently, but that's a whole other problem.
Orthodoc, sorry to hear about your marriage. My opinion is that when a marriage gets to the point where divorce is inevitable, those formerly important ideals such as love, loyalty, fairness, and sacrifice are lost. However much you feel them yourself, and your soon-to-be-ex partner claims to still feel them, fact is, they probably mostly went out the door before divorce was even considered. So protect yourself and whatever remnants of the relationship are left, and get legal representation.
I thought my divorce was civil and fair. I did the paperwork myself, he agreed to everything, which was slanted in his favor to get him to agree to a speedy end. Now, 10 years later, turns out he has been verbally stabbing me in the back to our daughter for years. As a result, any semblance of a relationship I have with her is in shreds due to his incessant trash-talking about me combined with normal teenage angst. So yeah. At this point, I almost wish I'd taken him to the cleaners (or at least gotten what was due me) instead of trying to "play fair" or be nice. :mad2:
Hello again orthodoc.
Stormieweather's and others' advice to get a lawyer is sound advice. I agree. I got a lawyer too. It's helpful to understand what a lawyer can do for you (and some things a lawyer can't do for you).
A lawyer can deal with your stb-ex when you can't for whatever reason, sadness, anger, whatever. This is a great service. A lawyer knows the rules of (dis)engagement, and you probably don't, another great service. A lawyer can offer you another informed perspective on critical subjective areas like property division, parenting plans, etc. A lawyer can serve as a reality check when you're trying for something that isn't smart or possible or worthwhile. As mentioned by several other dwellars, a lawyer can serve as a defender for you.
A lawyer can not keep your stb-ex from being a jerk or an ass, not now and not in the future. A lawyer could not have prevented the unfortunate circumstance described by Stormieweather. That story is tragic, and being as civil as you can be is the best way I can think of to keep that kind of harm from coming to you or to your children. A lawyer is expensive. Seriously. Is it worth it? Probably. A lawyer's not your friend though, they're working for their/your money. Don't expect them to be your therapist. They'll listen, they'll bill you, but that's not their area of expertise.
There are formal ways to conduct a civil divorce, like mediation. I tried this, and it was only partly successful. I don't know what resources you have available in your area, but this was a good start for me/us. I recommend it. Mediation was a shared expense, and as such, the mediator isn't working *for* you or *for* him, but for the both of you. The parts that worked--half price legal opinions (we each paid half), it was civil, I gave, she gave, etc. You can still have your own lawyer (though not in the mediation, that's kind of defeating the purpose). It felt fair insofar as we both felt like we were giving more than we got-ish. It's worth checking out.
I slept on this post, and I rose and decided that I needed to add my voice to the others touting the value of getting a lawyer. Hang in there.
I spoke with a lawyer today. Don't know if I can afford her; hope so. If I don't get someone good I'm going to walk away from an abusive 28-year marriage and get thumped but good on my way out the door ... not something I want to look back on as I eat cat food in my waning years. When stb-x initially agreed to a divorce by mutual consent I was so relieved I didn't think I'd have a problem dividing things up by verbal agreement, leaving the lawyers out of it, and just GETTING OUT - asap. I couldn't believe I'd be free in 90 days.
And then stb-x started in on money, telling the kids he can't afford them anymore (some are still in college and can't get loans because of his income), nickel-and-diming me on every tiny thing, telling one of my sons he could expect no more support because I'm $$$$ of his money walking out the door and it'll take him five years to make that back.
These comments are the punctuation to a huge full court press campaign to 'win me back' and make me see how much I'll be missing. And endless attempts to guilt me, plus lots of crying and using me as his confidante. And I've been gritting my teeth and taking it so I'd get my divorce in 90 days, and then he takes the cash anyway. And I can see I'll suffer through all this and then just be screwed over in the end. But I can't make him too angry or he'll a) clean out the joint accounts, which hold ALL our funds, and he watches them like a hawk, or b) do something scary. He used to be very scary. Lately, not so much ... but I'm sort of trained to be afraid of him, I'm embarrassed to say. PTSD.
But today I talked to a lawyer and a financial advisor and got a realtor lined up to appraise the house while stb-x is at work, and I am going to look out for myself. Once I stop trembling.
Hit 'send' too soon ... meant to say thanks for the advice. You guys are right. And maybe integrity sometimes means taking steps for self-preservation.
Clean out the accounts. There isn't a damn thing he can do about it. Happened to me and several others I know.
Oh wait - that may not hold true for you. What state are you in?
Trouble is, both our incomes are direct-deposited into joint accounts ... I'm leaving in 2 weeks for a residency training program and probably can't get my employer's payroll office to switch the direct-deposit to another account before I go, knowing how slowly the wheels grind. I'd miss my last three pays if I emptied the accounts now. If push comes to shove, though, I'll do what I have to. In PA I'd be accountable for the funds - couldn't just make off with them. But at least I'd have cash to pay the bills until the fighting cooled down ...
2 suggestions from my experience -
1) STOP the Direct deposit immediately.
2) Talk to a lawyer about withdrawals from the account. Based upon my experience there is nothing your stb-ex can do about it and they will be doing it if you don't. This happens all the time. The one that does it first usually wins.
FTR - I am not a lawyer nor should my comments be construed as legal advice. (CM[COLOR="Red"]A[/COLOR])
Good luck.
Good CM[COLOR="Red"]A[/COLOR]. :)
(^That's what I meant and that's how it sounded in my head so I don't know why I wrote CMY...probably thinking of CYA vs CMA!)
I just finally figured out what stb means. I kept thinking it was short for 'stubborn'.
:facepalm:
Good CM[COLOR="Red"]A[/COLOR]. :)
(^That's what I meant and that's how it sounded in my head so I don't know why I wrote CMY...probably thinking of CYA vs CMA!)
hahahaha - probably because thats what I wrote!
I'm blaming this damn mouse - frikkin HATE it! :mad2:
Okay ... saddlin' up, workin' the confidence here ... going to have the house appraised this weekend while stb-x (sorry, soon-to-be-ex) is at work ... stop the direct deposit and get checks sent to my new address ... lawyer up (a challenge in this little town, where all the lawyers are general practice, take long lunches and longer weekends, and don't do nasty divorces) ... and take what's mine from the accounts. Then go for what's mine in the estate.
Sounds good in my head, just gotta work this plan. What could go wrong? Wish I were in WV already. I may be posting from a shelter next week ...
Yikes! Just heard back from another realtor. Getting TWO appraisals, one tomorrow night, one Sunday ... on a roll here ... (sorry, I know this is pathetic)
Orthdoc this is far from pathetic. I am so glad you've decided to be proactive - particularly about future deposits in the stb-not-shared account.
If you think you may need to find a shelter look into it now. You may not need it, which'd be great, but wouldn't it be very reassuring to have that information up your sleeve, just in case? I am sure that just knowing you have a plan to fall back on will give you a new firmness in your dealings with stbex which you will find very helpful in the circumstances.
And know that you have a Cellar-ful of friends cheering you on, here!
Orthdoc, pathetic is absolutely the last word that comes to mind. Fucking go girl. Keep following the process, step at a time, let the momentum carry you along.
And I echo Limey's advice. Get details of a shelter now. I'd advise talking to them now and having them in the background for if crisis occurs.
Good luck. Though perhaps luck is the wrong word. Good journey.
What they all said, ortho.
This must be so hard for you and we are here for you when you need to talk. I also echo the sentiments about locating a shelter. Have that plan. If you don't need it, fine. If you do, have it planned well enough that the action you take is almost automatic.
Take care of YOU. You have all my warm thoughts today.
Not doing such a great job of taking care of myself, tonight. Every time I spend a few hours in stb-x's company I find I need to DRINK, drink, drink ... way too much. It's surreal, it's painful, it needs anesthetic.
I found out today that I can't afford the attorney I really want. Still looking for representation. Showed a realtor around the place today and it's hard - I'm giving up everything with no guarantees, no promises that anything will turn out well, that fairness will prevail. The most likely scenario is that, no matter what, after all I've given up and lost, I'll lose big-time at the end of it all. It's like a huge nihilistic joke.
The hardest part is the gardens here - I planted every plant, every tree, every shrub. I know them all intimately. I spent SO MUCH of my time and energy nurturing them. It's hard to leave at this time of year, when everything is growing and beautiful.
He still thinks I'm going away to live as a nun and come back to succumb to his studly awesomeness. He taunts me with stories of the many hot nurses who proposition him at work, and 'wonders' if they're sending a message? I wish he'd just bring them all home and get it over with. But what, and who, he wants is me, and it creeps me out. I'm angry. He wants to hot tub, so I put on a bikini and climb in and enjoy the night sky ... and then he tells me that come September his ass will be tighter than mine. What a guy. My stb-x ... what a guy.
He knows all my vulnerabilities, he knows how to hurt me. And I have to spend tomorrow with him, transferring titles on cars and so on. Sunday I gain some freedom, off to WV for 36 hours. Two more weeks. Counting, counting.
He's an ass.
I know about the vulnerabilities and knowing how to hurt you...been there, girl. It's emotional abuse. It's evil. It takes such a toll on you. But keep going, one foot in front of the other.
:comfort:
Hugs orthodoc. Oh and try not to drink too much. That stuff
won't help sweetie.
Thanks guys, doing better ... in my new place for one night of peace, anyway. Have a payroll/benefits session tomorrow. I am SO happy here! My own space. Staying off the booze, drinking some fantastic green tea my son recommended, and copying receipts/writing up stuff for the attorney.
I find it's easy to get muddled after spending a lot of time with stb-x; I bizarrely start feeling guilty, feeling bad for him! After so many years of abuse I still try to make his life easier. But then, just thinking of him angry makes me hyperventilate. And he'll be very angry very shortly.
Good to here from you. Keep checking in, and good luck for the road ahead!
Thanks guys, doing better ... in my new place for one night of peace, anyway. Have a payroll/benefits session tomorrow. I am SO happy here! My own space. Staying off the booze, drinking some fantastic green tea my son recommended, and copying receipts/writing up stuff for the attorney.
I find it's easy to get muddled after spending a lot of time with stb-x; I bizarrely start feeling guilty, feeling bad for him! After so many years of abuse I still try to make his life easier. But then, just thinking of him angry makes me hyperventilate. And he'll be very angry very shortly.
This sounds normal.
In my experience, having waves of feelings wash over and through me, from different directions, and of different origins was very unsettling. I had contradictory feelings like you describe. I don't think that's abnormal. I had mixed and contradictory feelings when we were married too. Think about it, there's not much in life of any substance or complexity that evokes purely one reaction. Certainly not something as complex and nuanced and extensive as a multi-decade marriage. You might be buffeted and confused by the whipsawing, but don't doubt yourself (easy to say, harder to do), this is a turbulent time. You're on the right track.
One additional benefit of writing down the things you want to get/do/avoid/etc on a physical list is that it helps keep you focused, your intellectual, analytical mind focused even when your emotional being is ... all over the place. You can't deny the feelings--they are freaking feelings--but it is possible to act one way and feel another. The list helps you focus your actions.
Hang in there. Keep moving forward. Cut yourself some slack.
Here's an article that's been in-the-making for more than 60 years.
NY Times
PETER PRINGLE
6/12/12
Notebooks Shed Light on an Antibiotic’s Contested Discovery
NEW BRUNSWICK, N.J. — For as long as archivists at Rutgers University could remember,
a small cardboard box marked with the letter W in black ink had sat unopened in a dusty corner
of the special collections of the Alexander Library. Next to it were 60 sturdy archive boxes of papers,
a legacy of the university’s most famous scientist: Selman A. Waksman,
who won a Nobel Prize in 1952 for the discovery of streptomycin, the first antibiotic to cure tuberculosis.
The 60 boxes contained details of how streptomycin was found
— and also of the murky story behind it, a vicious legal battle
between Dr. Waksman and his graduate student Albert Schatz over who deserved credit.
<snip>
I won't spoil the denouement on page 2 of the article.
I read the article and about Schatz my pants.
Unrelated to anything on the Cellar.
shit, piss, and corruption.
Typical lab bullshite. Rosalind Franklin did the x-ray crystallography that Watson and Crick used to make 'their' discovery of the structure of DNA. She accurately interpreted the data; she wasn't just a tech who didn't know what she'd recorded. Yet she was passed over when the Nobel committee awarded W&C the big prize. One of the biggest stories in 20th century science history, but who remembers Rosalind Franklin today? Only a few of us.
On other, less edifying topics ... huge fight today; narcissism reigns supreme in this household. Stb-x is livid that anyone knows of our impending divorce - the entire hospital is alive with the rumor now, G-d knows how, but small towns will be like that - yet tells me he suffers every day and night with shame over what he did all those years. The suffering is not, apparently, enough to convince him that I deserve not to be eating vegetable peels for two years while I get the necessary training to allow me to earn a living; nor is it enough to persuade him that I shouldn't use up the pittance he offers me as 'half' the value of our property in order to eat (occasionally) somewhat more than vegetable peelings. Of course, mortgaging our property is unthinkable for HIM ... he would rather sell it for a pittance and live elsewhere, telling the story of the heinous bitch who ruined his life to whomever could bear it.
And, after hours of screaming vituperative bile in my face, he knocks on my door and tells me not to go to sleep angry.
?????
He is an ass.
How long have you known him?
Call the police the next time. (Cannot believe I'm saying this)
Tell them he scared you and you feel threatened. If nothing else it puts his shit behavior on record and is more ammo for your side in the divorce.
jus sayin'
Thank you. Sorry to keep bringing up his assholistic behavior ... it's the combination of aggressive asshole abuser and cringeing victimized drama-king that drives me to drink. I suppose ... the more this happens, the easier I will find it to locate the most aggressive pit-bull lawyer I can find to defend what's left of my ability to carry on my life. Falling into the pit has its romantic attractions, but only at 2 am after one too many single malts. Rising above the pit and seeking equilibrium is a better alternative.
How long have you known him?
OMG, no way. It couldn't be.
Could it?
I need to stop seeing connections where none exist.
Shit. Too much. Leaving now. Check in later - thanks everyone, thanks.
Known him 34 years. you'd think I'd know better. But jerks dont' always declare themselves right away. This one took 10 years.
There's a time for drinking, to be sure. When you're together does NOT seem like a good one though.
I'm with classicman, at least as far as reading with dumbstruck miscomprehension that he actually suggested that course. It will be effective, but it leaves a smoking crater of no return.
Wasn't drinking tonight actually, just a general sort of reference ... but I left. Couldn't take the harassment, the sleep deprivation. Guess that smoking crater is there now ... all I want is some sleep
Ortho - please find the details of a refuge. Now. If you don't use it, fine, but if you do, won't you b glad the details are in your purse, phone or brain already? Please.
OMG, no way. It couldn't be.
Could it?
I need to stop seeing connections where none exist.
Let me in on it because wtf? ;)
[COLOR="PaleTurquoise"]*snortle*[/COLOR]
Ortho - please find the details of a refuge. Now. If you don't use it, fine, but if you do, won't you b glad the details are in your purse, phone or brain already? Please.
Thanks - I did leave last night and took refuge with friends whose location stb-x doesn't know. I can't stay there forever but have found out about the local women's shelter ... although they publish their address on their web page!! :eek: Years ago when we lived in a bigger town/city and I had to go to the shelter there, its location was absolutely secret. This one's openness doesn't fill me with confidence, although honestly I don't see stb-x appearing there demanding to see me. He'd be too embarrassed; this is a very small town, he'd be recognized.
But I do have the address and will use it if/when necessary.
I'm glad to hear you've thought this out, Ortho. Good luck!
Got some great information from an attorney a couple of days ago. Turns out I'm entitled to much more than I ever thought - enough to make it possible to keep the kids in college, if stb-x reneges on his financial support of them. I sat in the car and cried after leaving the attorney's office. Couldn't believe I have a way to protect my kids, and shouldn't have to exist on eggs (one daily, which is what I ate in first year university when I had no money) for two years while I get my training.
I'm stoked. The thought of being able to protect the kids, of NOT being held hostage to ensure they get what they need, is infinitely empowering. I don't intend to set everything in motion until I am physically out of the house, which is in six days. His threats, from years past, of the many ways he can kill me (with his anesthetic drugs and medical knowledge) still disrupt my sleep (although honestly, he'd probably just buy a gun and use it), so I'll keep the peace for six more days. But June 23 is my freedom date. :)
be the fuck careful. recently here in houston some jackass took out his wife, errrr soon to be ex-wife then himself with his kids in the next room. be careful and don't let your guard down.
Whs.
Good going Ortho. You're handling this brilliantly.
Be careful though. Leaving, organising custody, divorce etc, all potential flashpoints for violence.
Good for you orthodoc. Remember to stay focused.
Plan the work and work the plan.
That's great news, ortho! And yes, please, do look after yourself.
Thanks ... I definitely don't want to end up like the ex-gf of a surgeon in Buffalo who was recently shot in a stairwell of the hospital they both worked at; his body was found near his lakeshore home a day or two ago. In fact, I'm beginning to wonder about the wisdom of going after all that I'm entitled to. I know he'll let me walk away with his version of what's fair, knowing I'll have to come back to him asking for money, maintaining control of both me and the kids. He's totally invested in the idea that I'll come back after my two years of training and we'll get back together. :eek: He wants to go to football games in my new town, spend weekends at a resort nearby, and take me to Mackinac Island next year. I've been stalked before, a long time ago, and it was terrifying. But until it happens I can't take action.
If I make it crystal clear that there's no chance of any future relationship or contact by taking an adversarial stance in the divorce, and then take a great deal of what he considers 'his', I just don't know what he'll do. I think the chances of extreme violence are low. But he's somewhat unstable, impulsive, and prone to dramatic gestures. Hopefully the worst he'd do would be to quit his job here and go back to Canada.
There isn't any basis for a PFA order right at the moment and he knows, basically, where I'll be living in WV. I'll be easy to find. I'm spending the afternoon mulling over the relative risks and benefits of each course of action, which unfortunately can't be quantified (the risks, anyway).
All right, enough mulling. After several hours spent keeping the peace on Father's Day/son #2's birthday I can honestly say: damn the torpedos, full speed ahead. What will be, will be. Not going to worry about it.
This one's openness doesn't fill me with confidence, although honestly I don't see stb-x appearing there demanding to see me. He'd be too embarrassed; this is a very small town, he'd be recognized.
Thats exactly why you will be safer there. LOTS of witnesses.
But I do have the address and will use it if/when necessary.
Good, keep it handy.
Well, he's thrown me a big curve. Offered a very generous settlement and an immediate divorce (the earliest we could both sign is in about two weeks) to try to get me to stay civil. I'd like to be civil - until I'm safely out of the house. I'm not looking to take the scorched-earth route if I can avoid it, but I don't want to be pursued/stalked forever as he refuses to let go of me ... but that might happen no matter which route I take. I'm thinking maybe I should grab the offer and run ...
Am I being a gullible airhead here? :confused:
depends.
is "very generous" greater than or less than "what you're legally entitled to"?
How much value do you place on a promise of civility?
If it is a genuine offer and you could live with it, the (relatively) quick clean ending is possibly worth it. You only live once and the thought of wasting a year or two fighting out a divorce sounds unwise, when you could be getting on with your life.
Getting a lawyer to fight for every cent might cost more in fees and inflict months or years of stress and worry.
I'd get a lawyer to look over the settlement first to make sure there aren't any sneaky loopholes like shared debts and stuff, and to make sure it is honoured afterwards, but if it is something you could live with, maybe you should take it.
Peace of mind and a clean break is worth a lot in my book. I would definitely have your lawyer make sure there are no hidden snarks in the offer like Zen said, but if it's a fair amount to live on, and drops the big custody threats, I'd take it in an instant. You don't need exactly half of everything; you need freedom.
Trust but verify.
These are words. Promises. What is his credibility? What are the contingencies? What makes you thing *this time you're gonna kick that ball, Charlie Brown!"? That stuff.
I totally agree with you Clodfobble when you say having exactly half of everything is not necessary--true. Fair should be a good starting point. My Dad used to tell me a good deal is a state of mind. You can change your state of mind easily. But what you get and what you avoid can both be valuable. What can you do to minimize the chance or effectiveness of the things you want to NOT happen, like being stalked, or being pursued?
Actually, that's probably a whole question by itself, irrespective of any offer or contingency. In Washington, we have serious laws against stalking. Is there something like that where you live orthodoc? I don't believe there are any laws against being shitty or being mean or being unfair or being an asshole. **sigh** I don't really wish there were, just... sometimes. Anyhow.
I'd get someone else to look over the offer, the WRITTEN offer, BEFORE you sign anything. Please don't sign anything until you've had someone else, like a lawyer, read it and explain it. Not just for a reality check, but for a booby trap check, or an unenforceable promise check, or other shit. Like the "shared debts" booby trap. Don't sign that one. Divide the debts. This one is MINE that one is YOURS, no joint anything and get that shit in writing. I'm not kidding about getting it in writing. The debt collectors will want their money and not care fuck all about whose wallet it's coming from.
Hang in there. Get someone to read the offer. Keep your cool. Stay in touch.
Promises are only promises, even when they are in writing. If he reneges on payment, it can be a long expensive road to collect. On the other hand, reneging on a court ordered payment is contempt of court.
Clod's brain again serves up the wise advice. Big V is also very aware as he and I both went through similar, but different (yeh I know) situations.
Take some time and think about it. Any chance he is hiding Piles of cash somewhere or? Does he own his own business or anything like that? Are there safety deposit boxes loaded with cash? There is much to consider and be aware of it all. Seek professional guidance. Good Luck!
Thanks for your thoughts and good advice. I was able to see my lawyer yesterday and his take was: it's a good settlement - far better than the last offer stbx made, and essentially fair to me. It doesn't give me anything I'm not actually entitled to and able to get with the help of a good lawyer, but it doesn't shaft me either.
He said, 'Could you get MORE? Yes. Should you go after it? Only you can answer that.'
My take was, I'm not looking for the last dollar and I'm not looking to destroy stbx's reputation here such that he has to leave this town and never be spoken to again by anyone who knows him. I'm not looking to spend the next three years of my life fighting unless it's necessary. I've been a hostage to this relationship for many years; I'd like to start my training program and my new life now - not fill my entire residency with hearings and rancorous back-and-forth and possibly creating enough rage in stbx that I'd end up in physical danger. Or have him hurt himself and live out that fallout with my kids and in this small community. My big question to the lawyer: is there something hidden or not included here that will hurt me? He says no.
I know there aren't hidden assets; I've done the finances long enough and seen the actual financial statements, met with the accountant, etc. He's a partner in a business that's a service corp, no assets, they drain the accounts every month. There's no business value. I have the keys to all the safety deposit boxes, but most importantly, I know all his sources of income and see it all in our accounts.
I will have this agreement put in proper legal terms and entered into the record as a court order so that it's contempt of court if he reneges. Stbx has agreed to that (he wants it now, because then he can write off the alimony he's proposed to pay while I'm in training).
I have no illusions about why stbx is doing this; it's for his benefit, as always. His top priority right now is keeping me somewhat civil, trying to make it possible to stay in touch. After I left last week, he put this out there to try to keep the lines of communication open. I'm not deluding myself that he's suddenly become a nice guy. But walking away without three years of fighting, being free in early July, is worth a lot. So I'm still mulling it over, but if it can work, I'll take this, I think. If he reneges or plays games before the next two weeks are done, I'll just take the other road with my lawyer and so be it. But long-term anger and fighting are draining. I'd rather conserve my energy and get on with my life.
Eek! Didn't mean to write an essay. Bottom line, I think I'll give it a try and carry a big stick. And still walk very softly for the next two days ...
It's a good essay. Good luck.
good luck!
10 years ago my wife left me right after the adoption of our son was finalized. we split albeit not too amicably. heck, when she moved out she got a hernia and i was thrilled. "serves you right" i thought at the time. then she got it fixed. by my father. kinda made me take a step back and re-assess the situation.
at the time that she moved out, i still got to see my then 18 month old son almost every day. i paid my child support on time, and still do to this day.
point here is: I did get over it eventually. was i a loon then? no, just crushed that it didn't work out i guess. today though, she is a great mother to my child, we get along just fine and as well as things are, all around it's not that bad. could be worse.
hope that little trip down memory lane helped.
Thanks. I hope things can stay civil. Although he keeps moving the goal line. :mad2: He wants changes already, and he doesn't want a clause that says the settlement is dead if he backs out. That clause has to stay ... otherwise there'd be no alimony and my income would be pooled with his for the next two years while he refuses to sign. I'll hang onto that big stick.
do it. i consider myself very lucky in the relationship that i have with my ex wife. you haven't posted much, maybe lurked a lot, i dunno. point is, yes, this is an incredibly difficult time for you. trust me on this one though, it could be worse. in other ways you could even possibly imagine. and i mean outside of what you're going through now. i thought my divorce was the worst time of my life. i was wrong.
you've got him to a point to where he feels threatened. aka the clause that says the settlement is dead if he backs out. that's a control issue. this isn't 50 shades of grey. this is a divorce. i agree with you that the clause has to stay.
let me rephrase that. it MUST stay. i believed my ex when she said that a given court was on yada yada date and that it was only preliminary and i didn't need to show up. so i didn't. guess what. i was divorced that day and didn't even know it. i got duped.
that was then, this is now. hindsight 20/20 yeah, if i'd of had a lawyer then things would be different. BUT, point here is this, get through the divorce and don't let him control you. even while you're still there, if he tries to talk to you about negotiations then put a stop to it right there. tell him to talk to his lawyer so that his lawyer can talk to yours. difficult as it may seem, it's what really needs to happen. so so sorry you're having to go through this.
H.U.G.E row with Mum this morning.
Lasted until I was going to be late for work so Dad had to give me a lift in. He was a bit befuddled, but given I was crying hard and it was Mum who asked him he acquiesed.
I blurted out that she was such a negative person and she told me it was because I'd failed at everything I said I was going to do. She said that after her lumpectomy I was so helpful, but I'd just sat on my lazy fat arse ever since (this is partly true, but she just took back control over everything and never said a word about wanting help).
She said she didn't want me living here, but what could she do? But if I managed to keep a friend for more than a year perhaps it might be easier for her and Dad to live the life they deserved, rather than having me there all the time. This stung (particularly) as I have retreated into ultra-hermit mode to stay out of their way. I never cook for them any more (which I miss) do not eat any meal with them, watch no TV with them. But my presence in my bedroom is ruining her life.
I said we all needed to talk more, raising the times she has stormed out of the house - especially the time she ruined Christmas for all of us - and come back and not said a word to me. Literally. I've crept back into her good graces without ever really knowing why.
She pointed out I am not even able to keep my bedroom in the state she would like it so how could she ask me to clean anything else, and that I did nothing to help in the garden (both are true).
Unresolved.
I came home after a day spent on the edge of tears and have retreated up here.
I've been so upset all day I've been retching. If I told Mum that she's say I was showing off. But no-one knew because I "coughed" into a tissue. And in fact I told no-one except Mrs J who packed me off to the staffroom for a cup of tea to compose myself when I arrived.
I'm not asking for a solution. Nor for sympathy. Just saying how today was and why I am upset.
I might look up family counselling. This is not all on my Mum's side, I have to bear responsibility too. It's just that I am slightly less agressive and slightly less defensive. And yes of course I am aware that this is her house and she is doing me a HUGE favour. I just wish we could talk more rather than her game of What Can I Say To Hurt You Today?
so messed up.
I'm sorry Sundae. I wasn't there, don't know all sides, you're my friend and she's not, yada yada yada. Whatever. It sucks to hear grownups being mean like uncivilized children. Saying and doing things just for the hurtful effect. Tha's fucked up.
Mean people suck.
Sorry, Sundae. :( Hope you feel better soon.
So sorry to see this, Sundae! X
Sent by thought transference
I hope things are going better, Sundae.
that's a control issue. this isn't 50 shades of grey. this is a divorce.... point here is this, get through the divorce and don't let him control you.
Control is, and has been, the issue forever. But ... I'm out! As of yesterday. Physically out, in another state, on my own. It feels a bit like coming to the surface after being submerged in water for a long time. A bit of a shock, but wow, that first deep breath feels good.
I know things still have to be finalized and I have a lot to rebuild. Things won't be all roses. But ... wow.
Holy shit! Fuckin' 'A' ortho. How proud of yourself do you feel right now, on a scale of one to ten? I hope it's eleven.
Still in shock! Walking around my new apartment with a huge goofy smile on my face. Can't quite believe it.
And hey - thanks for the support. :thankyou:
Outstanding. Very happy for you.
ETA: Yeh the air is much fresher on this side.
Anytime Ortho. *smiles*
What's making me happy is: My little Carrotchops. He's just so fucking gorgeous.
At the moment, my stomach, that is all. :p: I hope everyone is doing well. :)
I just quit my church today. I'd had enough. I just found out about a business meeting in the bulletin and that was the last straw. The Pastor could have called me, or sent me an email, so I could have had a heads up. I'm just tired of being in the dark all the time and having my work disregarded.
Ach damn, fargon, that sucks. Is this the same church that put one of the leader's kids in a role he hadnt earned?
I hope you can find a new one soon, Fargon. It sucks to stay where you're unappreciated and disregarded.
Well done, Ortho!
And Fargon, I too hope you find another church where you're appreciated and which sustains you.
Sent by thought transference
Not upsetting me per se, but upsetting my stomach:
Dinner included fried eggs, and Mr. Clod pulled out the trusty bottle of Sriracha (aka rooster sauce) from the fridge. I thought it sounded like a good idea so I used some as well. Almost immediately my stomach began cramping, so I looked at the expiration date on the bottle.
August of 2008. Fucking hell, are you kidding me? Obviously we don't use the damn stuff as often as I thought we did.
Yikes. Hard to imagine what would grow in hot chili sauce, but then there's a bacterium for every occasion ...
More bad news arrived just as I was getting over a prolonged depression caused by a bad winter, bad job and two grandparent deaths. My grandfather (last living grandparent) is in the last throes of life.
I'm going to finish a knife for him. He doesn't understand what I do for a living, so I want him to see something I made that he will appreciate. I haven't been in the shop for ages, so I'm kind of going crazy and aghast at how crapped up I've let everything get.*
*= Yeah. Classicman, I realize I still owe you a knife. I'm sorry it's taking so long.
No worries - You got enough on your plate.
Hang in there.
My brothel of a house is upsetting me today. I've done no housework aside from washing for the last few weeks, so the floors and all the surfaces are disgusting and cluttered with toys and other stuff that has a proper place to be.
It all ends right here, right now!
See ya later when my house is straighter!
I'm thinking that "brothel" in Australian doesn't mean what it means in the US...
Sorry to hear that, Perry ... it does sound like your grandfather will really appreciate what you're doing. A truly meaningful gift at a critical time. Best wishes.
It probably means the same Clod, but over here we often refer to a house that's messy and untidy as a brothel, while still knowing it's not actually a whore house. ;)
damn.
eta: i kid but y'all know i care.
Our kitchen refrigerator is making me very angry today!!!:mad2::mad2::mad2:
My parents had the same refrigerator for 20 or so years, an old Kenmore model with simulated wood panneling on the doors that matched their kitchen cabinets. 20 years!!! My wife and I seem to end up having to replace ours very 3-5 years because the cost to repair this junk outweighs buying a new one most of the time.
So here is the issue. Every few months for no apparent reason the freezer side starts super freezing. I keep a thermometer in there to track the temp and it suddenly goes from an average of about 0 f to -20 f! And then the fridge side stops cooling and goes from an average around 35 f up to 50 f or so. The only way I have found to get it back in sync is to cart everything inside it out to my garage unit (doesn't every American have a spare out in their garage?) and shut the kitchen one off for a day or two and then restart it and it goes back to running normally for a month or 2! Trying to get by with the refrigertor in the garage sucks since it's 50 ft or so away and it's pushing 100 degrees outside now. Plus you have to carry all the stuff outside and then bring it back in!
Guess we will be checking prices this weekend for a new one as this is the last time I am dealing with this!
Have the AC power looked at , have them pay special attention to the Neutral to ground power , this should be 0 but never is , if its in the .25 Volts Ac range there could be an issue with connections
And No TW i have no Scientific essays from Sheldon Cooper or Steven Hawking to site , just 20 years of observation , and a Gut feeling
Well, duhhh. Move the bloody garage fridge inside to the kitchen, silly. ;)
I have neither qualifications nor experience, but my gut feeling is that it isn't electrical connections.
I'm imagining that there is one main cooling unit which provides cooling to both fridge and freezer, and the mechanism which distributes this between them has some kind of problem. I'm thinking the pipes which take chilled gas to the fridge block up, so that all the chilled gas goes to the freezer, thus causing the cold freezer and warm fridge. Or if there is some control mechanism to ration the chilled gas, this has a malfunction.
My mum's just had to buy a new fridgefreezer. Hers is only about 5 years old. Looks brand new, no longer works. Got a guy to look at it and he said there was a leak, with the gas escaping either out of the unit, or inside the unit. No residue at the back of fridge suggests it's not leaking to the outside.
Could top up the gas. Cost of £80, and if it's leaked to the outside that would most likely be enough for quite a while, but if it's an internal leak she could be faced with a broken fridge again within a few weeks.
So. With much grumbling and loathe to give up on what was a really good little fridgefreezer that looks still brand new, she has ordered a new fridge :p
Actually, from what I have found in help forums for refrigerator issues my unit cools from the freezer side and the cooled air is transferred to the fridge side via some vents. Somehow the vents get blocked with an ice buildup which is why letting the damn thing thaw out always seems to fix the problem. My dilemma is that it has been happening every 2-3 months for the past 3 years! This is like the 10th or so time I have had to do this and the thing is only about 5 years old! And it was a fancy smanshy model with shiny bright thingies and smooth glide drawers!
"And inside, it's just as lovely: two shelves where none are needed, and look at that -- close the door and the light ... STAYS ON!":)
OK, here is something else that is really putting a drag on my already not very good day!
I went to the AT&T store an hour before they opened this morning just after I found my refrigerator issue. I took a lawn chair and a cup of coffee and my Nook ebook and sat down in front of the door. I was going to be first in line to get the new Samsung Galaxy S III smartphone which was supposed to go on sale nationwide this morning. The manager shows up to open the store and tells me that they aren't going on sale today and no AT&T stores have them! Maybe next week!
Seriously thinking of suicide now! :greenface
If the frig is self-defrosting, check the drain tube for blockage.
(Frozen peas are notorious for causing multi-million $ damages.) ;)
We had that problem, beest fixed it. I'll ask him to stop in and spill the beans -I think it's to do with air circulation near the vent i.e. you may have to rearrange your food.
So I went to my local Best Buy to look at refrigerators only to find that they are remodeling and have temporarily closed the appliance dept. and suggested I drive to a different store which I did. Jesus! These things just keep getting more expensive! Looking at the LG models with the French door scenario. But most of them were on sale for the July 4th period which starts this weekend so at least I don't feel quite as bad. Funny thing is that when we were in Wales this year and rented our flat we noticed how small the appliances are like stoves and refrigerators. I think it's because people shop more often then we do.
Will Texas state law allow me to be buried in my refrigerator? I'd like to multitask this time around.
We generally have smaller appliances, because we generally have smaller houses :p
Space is at a premium in most British households
We generally have smaller appliances, because we generally have smaller houses :p
Space is at a premium in most British households
Yes and the cars and roads are smaller as well! I drove on some roads in Wales that were barely one car width wide! You just prayed that no one was rounding the bend going very fast.
But I do think Brits and many other people worldwide do shop more often than Americans so they don't store as much at home. I shopped mostly at a Tesco for general stuff and noticed that everything was packaged smaller to fit in the smaller fridge, like milk and other packaged foods.
Yes and the cars and roads are smaller as well! I drove on some roads in Wales that were barely one car width wide! You just prayed that no one was rounding the bend going very fast.
Lot of the roads round here are like that :P Often bordered either side by dry stone wall. Nowhere to go lol. You just kin of hope that there's a break in the wall for a farm gate set back a little so you can pull in if anything is coming the other way.
Mum refuses to come via the back street to my house if she's dropping stuff in or picking me up, because if another car comes whilst she's waiting she has to reverse her car for a long stretch of narrow and slightly bending lane :p
You're probably right about shopping though. At least...for some parts of the States. I suspect it depends how conveniently placed the shops are. Very few people live far from shops and supermarkets here. There really isn't the space for sprawling suburbs. Some rural areas can be tricky, but even then we're not talking US grade distance :p
Actually, from what I have found in help forums for refrigerator issues my unit cools from the freezer side and the cooled air is transferred to the fridge side via some vents. Somehow the vents get blocked with an ice buildup which is why letting the damn thing thaw out always seems to fix the problem.
We have this exact problem. Except for us, what always happens is the vents get stuck in the open position, and everything in the fridge gets too cold and freezes. Piece of shit Frigidaire Gallery. Now the freezer side has stopped defrosting altogether, so I have to scrape a bunch of ice out of it at least once a week. Can't afford a new one, and fixing it isn't worth the money because like you said, it's just going to happen again in 2-3 months.
I've had great luck with my frigidaire appliances so far. The dishwasher is on its way out after almost nine years. The motor and everything work fine, just all the racks, and plastic crap inside have all gone to shit. Replacing them all is more than a new dishwasher.
Chris, your freezer issue may also be a bad gasket letting in too much moist air. See if the frost buildup is greatest at any spot, that will be the source of the air incursion.
Actually, from what I have found in help forums for refrigerator issues my unit cools from the freezer side and the cooled air is transferred to the fridge side via some vents. Somehow the vents get blocked with an ice buildup which is why letting the damn thing thaw out always seems to fix the problem. My dilemma is that it has been happening every 2-3 months for the past 3 years! This is like the 10th or so time I have had to do this and the thing is only about 5 years old! And it was a fancy smanshy model with shiny bright thingies and smooth glide drawers!
"And inside, it's just as lovely: two shelves where none are needed, and look at that -- close the door and the light ... STAYS ON!":)
Chris, the same logic is applied if you overload your fridge/freezer. The air needs to circulate in order for the thermostat to know what it's supposed to be doing. If there's too much in there (particularly the freezer) then it will start doing stupid stuff.
I would recommend not putting so much stuff in there and see how that works for you. ;)
Yes, we noticed the milk going off and after working on it I found that yes the air was not circulating properly from freezer to fridge, also the freezer was crazy cold. On ours the flow from freezer to fridge is at the top, if you put your hand near it you can feel cold air being blown out. I cleared out the top shelf and put a hairdrier on it this only helped a little. I looked for the other vent that goes fridge to freezer it was about 3/4 of the way down and had a box against it sealing it up quite neatly, i popped the grill off and it was solid ice inside, I hit this with a hairdrier until I couldn't see any more ice and Bob's your uncle. I was careful to put jars and bottles in this area since they would not seal up the whole in the same way, been great since.
If you have cleared it out or it is working i would look for the two vents and make sure they don't get blocked.
I had an ante natal visit today. They told me I have gestational diabetes.
I'm too fucking old for this shit.
Oh Ali, sorry to hear that.
Thanks limey. I'm sure I'll be fine. I just can't imagine what more could go wrong other than for the baby to decide to come too early, and let's just hope that doesn't happen. :(
I'll keep my fingers crossed, and you can keep your legs crossed!!
I'm never having sex again.
That's not what I meant !
Sorry to bring this up again - I know lots of you were very helpful and supportive in early June when my stbx was pulling all sorts of shit, and I appreciate that more than you can know. And I've gotten myself moved out, and the final papers are supposed to be signed on Thursday (the 5th).
Today stbx texted all day saying his income has dropped drastically this month, that his income will be less than mine once he pays alimony for two years while I train (not true), and that I need to share expenses for the kids (college expenses). And he wants an exception to the nonmodifiable alimony in case he's totally disabled ... it has to be worded carefully though, because he can get his disability insurance if he decides he can't work ER anymore, even if he does other medical work and makes almost as much income as he does now.
I'm feeling like I'm still held hostage, like I will be for the next two years; he wants to meet in person, see my place, makes inappropriate comments about my body ... and I'm so close to having final papers signed, he says he's willing to do it Thursday morning, but now I feel like it won't really be final. Like he'll still have his hooks in me and I'll be hearing from him endlessly, and enduring his inappropriate comments and having to use my bit of capital to keep the kids going, and I'll feel like I just got f*cked over after all, trying to leave ...
I guess I'm trying to talk out the fact that I don't think this can work in a civil way. That I'm probably going to have to take the scorched-earth route and discontinue my initial divorce filing and re-file in the county where we live, so that I can hire the attorney that I'd prefer to have ... and it'll be 2-3 years of bitter fighting and acrimony and endless expense.
I didn't want this to happen. I hate it. After 2-3 years of fighting there may not be much left once the lawyers get their take. But I can see endless years of being hoovered back into interactions that trigger my PTSD and make me almost unable to function. He ruined my day today and it wasn't a critical day at work; once those critical days start, I can't afford this. It makes me SO angry ...
Sorry, orthodoc. I wish I had more to offer than a virtual hug. Your situation sounds like it totally sucks.
sounds like Uncle vinny and D Boyz need to go have a Little talk with butt head
All hugs very much appreciated, clod ... and I heart you, zippyt!
Need to take some time-out and regain some perspective ... maybe it's a good thing tomorrow is a holiday.
I was just wondering about you a day or two ago ...
Ortho - more hugs coming atcher from waaaay over here. I'd say whatever you do do NOT let him come to your new place - try to keep that free of any taint of him. In fact, can you arrange to only meet him in a public place (coffee shop?) with a third party present (if you must meet him at all?), which might inhibit his inappropriate remarks? Though I'd much rather you didn't meet him at all.
Sorry that your attempts to be civil seem not to be appreciated. Maybe scorched earth is the only way to protect yourself moving forwards?
Ignore the text. Don't meet him until Thursday, don't agree to any changes or anything new. If he doesn't sign as planned then :( take it from there, but if he does and it's the deal you were happy with before....it might just happen. All that twaddle about income reduction is BS to try and get back in charge. Typical bully shite. Keep being strong.
I agree, I don't want him ever to set foot in my place here, not ever. I changed my plans and will stay with one of my sons tonight, not in smalltown, and will just drive up very early tomorrow for the attorney appointment. And wouldn't you know, stbx texted me first thing this morning wanting to know exactly when I'm arriving in smalltown - wanting to get together today during the day. I won't see him until tomorrow; very thankful my son offered the alternative plan.
I've spent the morning crunching numbers and thinking about the current offer/plan, and it's still probably worth doing if things come together tomorrow. I'm a bird-in-the-hand sort of person generally. But if things fall apart ... Plan B.
It's hard for me to see the bullying and control stuff when he's acting pathetic and pretending to be friendly ... but strip away that stuff and look at the content of his texts and I want to smack him. He's reneging on his promises to the kids. :mad2: Well, I'll make sure they're all right - but if he reneges none of us will ever speak to him again. If I go with Plan B he'll certainly renege - either way, I'll have to grow a pair and give him a reality check. Guess it's time. :mad:
If you know you're going to have to meet him for some reason, wear an old housecoat, torn stockings, uncombed hair, and a runny nose can't hurt.;)
Having a witness present might be a good idea.
Seriously, there is no reason you should have to meet him alone, and it would give you a reason to keep trying to keep things businesslike and get matters dealt with.
Yeah, I'd avoid one to one meets for now. You're strong, but that doesn't mean you aren't vulnerable to his emotional blackmail. He's had years to hone his tactics and find your weak spots. Don't give him the opportunity to use that.
As much as you want this done with, and as much as you want things friendly (if that ship has not already sailed, as I suspect it might have) you also need to protect yourself. Not just from the financial loss, or even the potential for actual harm, but also from the emotional impact he is able to have on you. Don't underestimate the amount of pull he could still exert if you're at a low ebb. He's clearly more than willing to try and use that to his own financial advantage and to your, and the kids', financial disadvantage. Waving the difficulties "you'd" be bringing on your children by doing this is about as shitty as it goes. Like a spoilt child who's suddenly been told 'no' and is trying to wheedle and tantrum by turns.
Like a smoker clearing their house of all cigarettes and ashtrays when they're giving up, don't put anything in your way to trip yourself up.
My Land Rover Discovery is at it again, it's been a few months since I had to sink money into it so I guess it was inevitable! Drove it 2 or 3 times earlier this week and within blocks of my home 2 lights (M&S) on the dashboard start flashing and the transmission goes into limp home mode. I stop and restart the car and it is fine for a mile or so and then it does it again. No engine codes or anything. I did some online research and is sounds like something called the XYZ switch which is on the side of the transmission and it handles gear changing. Apparently the AC drain hose is right over it and it eventually gets water in it. But I really need it to through the Check Engine light so I can read a code. Another great Land Rover design fail!
So I looked at replacing it and a new one is $700! For a FUCKING switch??? I can get a used one on Ebay for $125 but it may or may not work and for how long.
Wow. It's done. I didn't arrive in smalltown until this morning at precisely the appointment time with the lawyer, so avoided the one-to-one meeting trap. I was able to stay with one of my sons last night and watch some fireworks that were fantastic - spent a great evening, and my son was very supportive about today. He canceled his plans to spend the afternoon and evening with me!
The lawyer kept it short and sweet and, to my surprise, stbx signed off and it'll be done within a few days. I walked out feeling a little unsure of my feet - couldn't believe it.
The moment we got outside, stb-x started in on money - how, now that he's been so 'generous', we have to change the verbal arrangement about the kids. I shut. him. down. Told him nothing doing, our original agreements all still stand. Didn't tell him he dodged a major bullet - if he thinks he's been generous, it's nothing to what could've been. I'm going to keep that in reserve for when he gets persistent about $$, as he will. (If he reneges on the kids, of course I'll keep them going. I just won't be his bullied silent partner.) He quickly backed down, saying he wants to stay friendly because - wait for it - he seriously wants me to remarry him in two years. He really thinks that will happen.
If he really thinks that, I have a bridge to sell him. :eyebrow:
Now that it's done, I don't feel the same intimidation I did before, the worry that everything would blow up and I'd spend years in court. Even if I walk away with a little less, this is totally worth it. There'll be no reason for him to be checking up on me, as there would be if I'd gone for permanent alimony. I just don't want him to have any justification for stalking me.
So ... wow. On my way to Canada to be there for my dad's surgery, and I just can't believe it. Thank you, guys, all your good advice and support has been a godsend. And Bruce, if - IF - I have to meet with him again I'll definitely go the old housecoat-torn stockings-runny nose route!! :p: Great idea!!
Oh what great news! I hope your Dad is OK and how fabulous that you can go and see him with that behind you!
*wide smile*
Oh Ortho, how fucking magnificent is that? You're on your way chickadee. My best wishes and congratulations on your stb-x-free future :)
Chris - I feel your pain. There is now something wrong with the Jeep AGAIN!
The air only works through the defroster vent. Cannot get air to blow through the floor vents nor the dash. AND the Cruise control is nonfunctional as well. Oh effin joy.
Thanks guys - am very relieved.
Joining the car whinge club. In the shop agaian today -brakes- some of it warrantied some of it not. Just had a $940 repair bill a month ago (suspension) Fucking car needs to be replaced. On top of that, the friend I drove to the airport Tues said as I was driving Oh, if your car breaks down the car's in the garage and the keys are.... i assumed on the table/counter didn't really listen becuase i just got the damn thing fixed....... Could I find the keys anywhere in the entire house? nuh-huh so We all had to walk in the 100+ humd temps and Swimmer Girl had to miss practice. becuase it was 5am where the firend was, and she doesn't answer her cellor text at the best of times anyway..... She'llprobably tell me where they are sometime Sunday. Whine Whine Whine.
Yes, please, a little brie and some water crackers would be lovely.
Not really upsetting...but I cant be arsed looking for the other threads.....today I went over to my neighbours (who are away) with one of my other neighbours and we tidied up their yard as their dog (Blueheeler) was quite destructive in her boredom and dug up all the vegies and made a mess....(I also watered their 3 "pot" plants I found - how good a neighbour am I??)
When I stod up after weeding, I felt something kinda prickly in my pants...we have a lot of prickles up here, and although I couldnt figure out how it got up that high (above mid thigh), I shoved my hand down my pants and PULLED OUT A MASSIVE FUCKING HUNTSMEN SPIDER!!!! (Google it, I dare you).
Even now as I sit here, I can feel its prickly little legs......ewwwrrrewwwrr.
Ewww. And by ewww, I mean jesusfuckingchristnoway*majorshudders*
Eeeewwww .... I think that qualifies as upsetting!! I took the dare - that is one gigantic, horrid thing.
harmlessharmlessharmlesshaaaaaaaahhhhhgetitoffgetitoffgetitoff!!!!!!!!!!!!!
KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT
KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT
KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT OMFGKILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT
KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT
KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT KILLIT
I would scream like a Girl and flail about trying to get that big hairy fucker off me
INFI - [SIZE="5"]DO NOT GOOGLE IT![/SIZE]
To my credit...it lives and breathes now. I flung it far enough to qualify for Olympic discus ...but it lives to torment again.
Ah Ducky, so hot even the spiders are trying to get in her pants. ;)
haha...a spider in the pants. Enough to spoil just about anyone's day! lol
Sorry...my lack of sympathy is astounding, but I am imagining the scene of the crime. lol It would have been funny.
I was gonna watch "The Daily Show" earlier, but when I browsed my personal channel list, Comedy Central wasn't there. I just checked Google News, and saw
this.
Its ok, I wasnt really looking for sympathy.
In my typical fashion, I am very calm at the time of the incident, but I certainly shuddered and checked my pants every 5 minutes for a good few hours afterwards.
Today whats upsetting me is Jackson is feeling a bit under the weather, poor puppy.
I think the sandflies are giving him hell because he's scratched himself raw above his tail, he doesnt have fleas because he gets treated. I have wiped him over with some tea tree oil to deter the little bastards and put some Itch-Eeze on his sore bits...its Antiseptic and Anaesthetic. A bit of couch time with the wriggling 52kgs and hes a bit happier.
I was going to take him for a walk, but he will go in the salt water (which will be good for his sore), which will wash all the stuff off that I just put on him.
[SIZE="4"]PLEASE DEAR GAWD GIVE ME THE STRENGTH TO NOT WALK OUT OF HERE TODAY. PLEASE![/SIZE]
I now return you to your regularly scheduled program.
You can do this. Let's get that resume shined up though. Leave on your schedule not theirs.
Thanks, Griff. That's what I keep telling myself.
And my cow orkers are wonderful. We're all feeling the same way, but that doesn't alleviate any of the crap, and my health is really suffering. I wish I could take these kinds of things in stride, and know that in the long run it's of little importance.
I think a lot of it is worrying I'd disappoint my family or make my mom and dad worry about what will become of me.
I know I keep going over and over this and I appreciate that I can vent here, but I just don't know how much longer I can hang on. Do I think the consultants are going to make a difference? I don't really know. I have a proposal on the direction I think this job should go, and what should be on my plate and what should not. I can't do any of it well because there's just too much. And I can't live with that nagging feeling that I'm doing a half-assed job at what I was hired to do. But they misrepresented this position, and I've never had a moment of job ownership or time to update, upgrade, fix processes, hone processes: the things I was hired to do, there is no time for.
So you're right, I need to get my resume updated and start looking. I'll most certainly have to take a pay cut, but I can't keep on going like this.
Infi, can you get a written commitment about when the consultant's report will be done, and implemented by?
If you have a job you like doing, are good at, and feel you are making the world a little better by doing, that is a valuable asset. I do regret quite a bit about losing/leaving my former job - but I don't miss the bullshit from the narcissistic middle-manager.
Consultant hasn't even come yet. Two schools of thought: either it's just a pretty bow to tie on the manager and act like they give a crap, or this consultant will actually listen to each of us.
I have ideas, some really good ideas, on how to do things better. It'd be nice to be heard, it'd be nice if things could change and I could stay here.
snip==
If you have a job you like doing, are good at, and feel you are making the world a little better by doing, that is a valuable asset. I do regret quite a bit about losing/leaving my former job - but I don't miss the bullshit from the narcissistic middle-manager.
You sound really old and wise when you post stuff like this.
There *is* more to a job than just the money, no matter how much money there is. Now, of course I've never had a million dollar contract, so I can't say how life is at that rarefied level. Maybe I could learn to love the "bullshit from the narcissistic middle-manager" or any other kind of bullshit. But life-sucking bullshit has been a part of every job I've ever had. Sometimes that cost was almost equal to the paycheck; usually it wasn't close.
The larger point is that you spend a *LOT* of time at work. Liking it is important. Pay is important too. But if it hurts you, if it tears down your mental or physical health, that should be a sign to look elsewhere. It's like any other pain. It's a signal that something needs to change.
A cow orker said yesterday (as I was lamenting my situation: too much to do and I'm trying to take my goddam vacation I haven't taken in 2 years) that the VP told her "A new day is dawning."
Which gives me some hope.
I might be losing my Turbo...while Im in Tucson taking care of my Mom for a month.
I hope he doesn't go. I hope he can wait until I can come home to hug him one last time.
My best friend from childhood just had a miscarriage. :(
And this morning I cut the ever-loving shit out of my thumb. This happened at basically the exact time she was receiving the news, it turns out, but I don't ascribe any supernatural significance to this as I tend to cut and burn myself all the damn time in the kitchen. But now every time my thumb hurts, I am reminded of her and get sad all over again.
I'm sorry, Clod.
Pain - physical, psychological, spiritual, emotional ... I don't know that it makes us stronger. For the most part, it sucks.
Who do I have to blow to get an avatar here?
Ach Clod, sorry to hear that.
@ Pico: ah babe, that's hard. My heart goes out to you and Turbo.
Who do I have to blow to get an avatar here?
Me
::drops trou::
Actually, we don't use em. We're purists.
@ Pico: ah babe, that's hard. My heart goes out to you and Turbo.
Thanks Dana, looks like it might be a false alarm, but I havent gotten an update from my husband today, but he was giving him quite a scare. Hopefully he is just missing Pico and me. (We are both in Arizona).
Who do I have to blow to get an avatar here?
Save your pucker, there are none.
Today I feel ill. I was sick most of the night last night. Kept waking up with stomach cramps and really bad indigestion...and before any of you start, it's not the baby coming! It's way too early (by at least 6 weeks, and they weren't those sorts of pains). I'm almost certain this feeling is because of stress brought on by a situation that occurred yesterday.
This is the story.
You might remember me mentioning that Aden has had the same g/f for over a year now and they're pretty serious. Recently they had a bit of a falling out and decided to cool it for a while. During this time, I haven't really been happy with how Aden has handled himself. I think he's treated his g/f badly, mainly by just totally cutting her and being a general arsehole about their communications. I have not been proud at all, and have spent some amount of time trying to tell him how his behaviour is not good and how I'd thought I'd taught him a bit more compassion etc etc. All those things you say to kids to try to appeal to their better nature.
So anyway, over the last few days they've been talking again and making murmurings about missing each other and getting back together, so after school yesterday, Aden went over to M's place so they could 'talk' things through and decide if it's what they wanted.
Instead of talking, they ended up in the sack.
M's Mum walked in.
Aden called me and said he and M had had words and would I come pick him up.
So I did.
Turns out they've been having sex for about 6 months now.
Anyway, this is a big challenge for me because I don't agree with 15yr olds having sex, but I take some consolation in knowing that at least they're in a relationship and it's not mixed up with booze and partying, which is of course how it happens for a lot of kids that age.
So, I don't know whether to punish him or just let life take its course. I know for one thing that he will be on a very short leash as far as spending time with M if they can get over this latest hurdle. Aden is of course worried that her parents are going to hate his guts now. I said it would be understandable if they did, so he needs to man up about it and face the music if he's going to try and be a part of their daughters life.
so anyway, thinking about all this is what's upsetting me and making me feel ill.
Sorry, Ali. I think you handled it as well as anyone could have. As for punishment, I would personally only be in favor of it if they were doing it unprotected (and if so, the hammer would be coming down pretty goddamn violently...) But I also know that I have an extremely casual attitude towards sex in general, and many teens are not prepared to be as mature about it as I would like to think, so I could easily be wrong in that regard.
Aden promises they were using protection. I hope that if they continue their relationship, M might consider taking some of the responsibility too. Since they were both virgins going in to this, at least the risk of STD's is minimal, but pregnancy is obviously not. Aden has big plans for his future. I'd hate to see those plans fall to pieces because he needs a job more than he needs an education.
I'm like you Clod in so far as being pretty relaxed about sex. I just wish they could have waited another year. At least they'd both be seniors then, and Aden would be just about out of school.
I'm feeling a bit better now it's all out in the open although I can only imagine what Dazza will have to say when he gets home from his latest trip. He's a shit load more conservative than I am, so I doubt I really need to say much more about it. I'm pretty sure Dazza will cover it. lol
Here's a picture of them. They really are so cute together.
[ATTACH]39933[/ATTACH]
... But I also know that I have an extremely casual attitude towards sex in general...
I'm just finding this out now?
WTF?
What's your general attitude toward casual sex?
^WHS^ funny - that caught my {eye} too.
@Ali. yup that's about the age nowadays. Frightening. I think you covered it pretty well.
This may be one of those situations where a guy's perspective will be better received.
(Insert Dazza here)
Ali I really wanted to have sex with my boyfriend when I was 15 and he was 16.
We went pretty much all the way there. Unprotected. We were both intelligent, educated and well aware of birth control and how to obtain it, but the sheer rush of hormones at that age is so hard to control. He came from a strict Baptist family, I came from a Catholic one. Neither of our parents ever found out how close we'd come to sex and both would have been appalled. We would have been considered dirty, out of control, bestial.
I can't imagine being on the parental side of the fence. As a 15 yo I thought it natural, wonderful, exciting and the best feeling I had ever experienced. As an adult, wondering whether you are "condoning" something harmful to your child must be agonising.
All I can suggest is keep thinking it through, keep loving him and keep encouraging him to talk, even though that will make him squirm. And for goodness sake encourage him to put one on. Just because this girl is special and right and truthful about protection, not every girl will be. And if he doesn't get in the habit of wearing a condom he's into a statistics game that can have life-changing consequences.
Look at what happened to my niece. She didn't learn first time round and is now going through the baby blues with a vengeance. She's been hit with the clarity hammer; this isn't like grinding away for an exam, where you get a round of applause, a certificate and a nice long rest before starting again. This is now 24/7 responsibility.
He's a good boy and you're a good parent. And very few 15 year old boys behave well to ex girlfriends. Too much testosterone, pride and a certain amount of immaturity (especially as you now know sex was in the mix). You talked to him about it - he'll get through that phase with a woman's perespective on hand. She's obviously forgiven him for that part at least.
Try not to hurt yourself too much over this.
I'm with you Ali. I feel like its too young, but we can't deny reality. Is M's mom going to be rational about this or are the kids going to be pushed into sneaking around?
Biologically, they are ready for this.
Psychologically and emotionally ... maybe. But most people do most things without being really ready for them, and survive.
Socially, it would be a boost for him, and I think nowdays for her too - provided it's just one guy.
Legally, they're both underage, but given that they're the same age, the police probably wouldn't do anything.
So, as a non-parent, I wouldn't be too worried about it, provided they are double safe - pill and condoms. Even properly used, condoms have a failure rate.
Better they are doing it in a house where they are safe than some dodgy teen hangout by the old sewage works or whatever.
Me
::drops trou::
Actually, we don't use em. We're [strike]purists[/strike] tantrists.
FTFY
Fix your face
•spoken in to my phone
Who do I have to blow to get an avatar here?
You can put an avatar on your profile page.
I'm just finding this out now?
WTF?
What's your general attitude toward casual sex?
I've never considered sex to be some sort of sacred physical act, separate from all the other options. As a teen I always figured, it was a straight yes or no answer--if I was willing to kiss you, I was willing to sleep with you. (And no, I was not willing to kiss the vast majority of boys. But for the ones I was, I would have kissed/slept with them on first offer and not thought twice about it.)
But I did learn the hard way that many people don't feel this way. I had one early boyfriend who, in retrospect, I think I probably pushed into it too soon, not by actually pushing but by being so casual about the topic that he may have felt he needed to rise to the challenge (nyuck nyuck nyuck.) Another one had massive insecurities and a significant need for nurturing, and our relationship largely dissolved because I didn't realize I was supposed to be providing that until it was way too late.
So, as a non-parent, I wouldn't be too worried about it, provided they are double safe - pill and condoms. Even properly used, condoms have a failure rate.
This was my m.o. as a teen--I was on the pill, but I always lied and said I wasn't so that the boys would know they had to use condoms and never try to talk me into skipping them.
As an adult, wondering whether you are "condoning" something harmful to your child must be agonising.
All I can suggest is keep thinking it through, keep loving him and keep encouraging him to talk, even though that will make him squirm. And for goodness sake encourage him to put one on. Just because this girl is special and right and truthful about protection, not every girl will be. And if he doesn't get in the habit of wearing a condom he's into a statistics game that can have life-changing consequences.
He's a good boy and you're a good parent. And very few 15 year old boys behave well to ex girlfriends. Too much testosterone, pride and a certain amount of immaturity (especially as you now know sex was in the mix). You talked to him about it - he'll get through that phase with a woman's perespective on hand. She's obviously forgiven him for that part at least.
Try not to hurt yourself too much over this.
He's not doing too badly, and now he's got a nasty cold. Not sure if karma had anything to do with that, but it's punishing him. lol He's still talking to me about things, and better than before now it's out in the open, so that's all I can ask for at this stage.
I'm with you Ali. I feel like its too young, but we can't deny reality. Is M's mom going to be rational about this or are the kids going to be pushed into sneaking around?
I sent an email to M's Mum explaining my thoughts and letting her know that I'm disappointed in Aden, but that it does take two to tango, so they both bear the burden of responsibility in this. I haven't heard back from her at this stage, and I really have no idea how they're going to manage the situation long term. The kids are a bit lost in the woods too I think. They're not sure what the next move should be so they're biding their time. So far no gun toting fathers though, so that's a good thing.
Biologically, they are ready for this.
Psychologically and emotionally ... maybe. But most people do most things without being really ready for them, and survive.
Socially, it would be a boost for him, and I think nowdays for her too - provided it's just one guy.
Legally, they're both underage, but given that they're the same age, the police probably wouldn't do anything.
So, as a non-parent, I wouldn't be too worried about it, provided they are double safe - pill and condoms. Even properly used, condoms have a failure rate.
Better they are doing it in a house where they are safe than some dodgy teen hangout by the old sewage works or whatever.
I think the legal age in Qld is 15, and Aden went to some lengths to explain to me that they waited till they were both 15. At least they thought that much through. lol
The challenge I have is not approving of it happening at all, and not wanting to encourage it by providing a 'safe place' for them to have sex. I'm not going to just say, yeah go ahead and do it in my house, but I suppose they will when they think no one's around, and I can't really help that other than to make them stay in the communal areas all the time and be constantly supervised, and honestly, I don't think that sort of behaviour breeds trust or maturity.
I don't know. I guess we'll just have to wait and see how things all work out.
And now for more good news. Mav has finally found himself a girlfriend, but she's a couple of years older! She's a lovely girl though, and I don't care about the age difference really, but I imagine I'll be dealing with the whole sex issue fairly constantly from now on. *sighs*
I'm too old for this shit!
I've never considered sex to be some sort of sacred physical act, separate from all the other options. As a teen I always figured, it was a straight yes or no answer--if I was willing to kiss you, I was willing to sleep with you. (And no, I was not willing to kiss the vast majority of boys. But for the ones I was, I would have kissed/slept with them on first offer and not thought twice about it.)
But I did learn the hard way that many people don't feel this way. I had one early boyfriend who, in retrospect, I think I probably pushed into it too soon, not by actually pushing but by being so casual about the topic that he may have felt he needed to rise to the challenge (nyuck nyuck nyuck.) Another one had massive insecurities and a significant need for nurturing, and our relationship largely dissolved because I didn't realize I was supposed to be providing that until it was way too late.
This was my m.o. as a teen--I was on the pill, but I always lied and said I wasn't so that the boys would know they had to use condoms and never try to talk me into skipping them.
Who knew you were such a romantic?
:p:
I know, right? And yet for some reason, most of my boyfriends' parents have disliked me. Go figure.
Aden's girlfriend is very pretty, by the way Ali. At least if she did get pregnant they'd make some really good looking babies...
Yeah, I guess that's one plus. lol I'd rather not contemplate that idea too much though.
I know, right? And yet for some reason, most of my boyfriends' parents have disliked me.
The fathers knew ... they. just. knew.
Actually, they didn't like it that you were smarter than them.
I think the legal age in Qld is 15, and Aden went to some lengths to explain to me that they waited till they were both 15. At least they thought that much through. lol
http://www.afao.org.au/library/topic/youth/AFAO_Fact_sheet_Age_of_Consent_Laws_in_Australia.pdf
Queensland: The age of consent for anal sex is 18 (s 208(1)) and 16 for any non-anal sex (s 215(1)).
Uh-ohhhh.
Well, here's you're compromise position.
"You kids can root, but NO ANAL!"
:lol:
Hmmm....well he'll be legal in a couple of weeks. lol M will be a few months more after that. I guess they'd better just behave themselves.
But surely the consent age only applies to partners who are of age themselves? They wouldn't put two 15 year olds in jail...
My envy reply was not to zengum's post. It was to Glatt's previous post.
Check your local laws for those "few months more", though.
Upsetting me today?
EVERYTHING.
Got my new meds.
May take a while to kick in. Hope not as I hate absolutely everyone and everything and am halfway to getting drunk which I know will make me hate more but I can't cope with it all. Only thing I can hope for is no yap from my parents and fall asleep as early as possible.
Except I know alcohol interferees with medications so it is precisely the wrong thing to do so I am angry about it.
Sundae, we love you more than the alcohol does.
Don't be angry about it. Not whilst you're doing it. Start your new drive for healthy living tomorrow. You'll be starting a fresh day with your new meds having had a blow out today.
*hugs*
Summer hols suck ass when you're in the education bidness.
*** Brit-centric post ***
Link to BBC release
A body has been discovered in Tia Sharp's grandmother's house.
It has yet to be identified, but given there is one 12 year old missing, and a dead body found, it's not too much of a stretch.
The 12 year old went out to buy a pair of shoes last week and never returned. Grandma's 37 year old partner was the last to see Tia when she left the house. He couldn't be 100% sure where she'd gone as he was doing the hoovering. She left without her Travelcard, mobile and apparently with very little money. I was suspicious from the start I admit.
There were unconfirmed sightings, but she wasn't identified on any CCTV footage or remembered by any bus or tram drivers in the area. Police were in fact unanle to place her at any time after leaving the house.
Poor kid. Sounds like she never did.
"Grandad" Stuart Hazell is currently missing.
(thanks for the kind words Dana & Clod, I was in a real state that night. Am slowly coming round, but am still a bit snappy. And yes - it's the hols which are exarcerbating things)
Ahh shit. Poor little lass.
[eta] Gods, I wouldn't want to be her Gran right now. How awful to have brought the killer into the fold so to speak. Wouldn't be surprised if he had wooed the gran to get the granddaughter. Apparently he was at one point friends with the girl's mum.
Dante's in a bad way. Think he may have had a stroke yesterday evening. Wasn't much the vet could do so advised to keep him calm and rested til morning.
Tragic sight though. No coordination, head tilted to one side, can't stand. Not sure how he is right now, but apparently calmer after some sleep.
Waiting to hear from Mum once the vet's called back.
Come on, Dan. Get better love. We're not ready to lose another.
Sorry about that Dani. He was Pilau's brother wasn't he?
It's over, he's gone.
Rest in Peace Dante. Pemontell Light Fantastic.
My heart's breaking all over again. Both the boys are gone now. The two brothers. And Carrot's lost his best BigDog. His mentor, friend and walking companion.
Poor Mum. It's an awful place to be.
I hate losing a dog. They connect with us so honestly. sorry
Sorry to hear that Dani. Glad he's out of pain and distress.
My love to your Mum in such an awful time.
Sorry to hear of this Dani.
Thanks guys. Means a lot.
Nearly broke down on the field earlier. Before the vet had been down to Mum's but we knew it was the end. Was walking carrot, and that's one of the places we used to meet up with Mum and Dan. Poor lad has no idea he isn't going to see him again. His bestest BigDog. He loves him so much. the idea that we won't ever meet up with Dan like that again hurts.
Sorry to hear this Dani
so will mum be getting a New youngling ???
*shakes head* I don't think so. She's said for some time now that Dan would be her last dog. For all sorts of reasons really. She's in her late 60s and has concerns about taking on a pup who'd be with her into her 80s. She did at one point consider maybe taking on an older dog, but that means taking on all the endgame stuff without having the years leading up:P
Most of all I think she's just weary of the heartache that comes at the end. She's been through it now many times, and I think she's just not up for having her heart ripped out all over again.
Plus, she's always had dogs. Dogs or kids or both. Barring a few months, she's had that all her adult life, and they are tying. I think she wants to see what life is like without that.
Whatever she decides, she also has a stake in Carrotchops. She can be a part time gran instead of a full time mummy :p
I dunno though for sure. She's said this before on previous occasions, but that was after losing dogs in shocking ways. This time, I feel she may be decided.
I am so sorry Dani :( Its so sad to lose a fur guy :(
Aw, thats really hard. So sorry for your Mom.
and in other doggy news, our Sally went missing yesterday. We're hoping someone has found her and is keeping her, so we're going to put some signs up shortly.
[ATTACH]40035[/ATTACH]
So, so sorry to hear this, Dana ... so hard, on so many levels, to lose a fur friend. Many hugs to you and your Mum.
And Ali ... sending my best hopes that Sally will be found safe and sound.
Thanks guys. It is hard. We must love them to keep going through it.
@ Sundae: I posted a thanks to Griff just as you posted your message ;p So it looks like I thanked everybody but you. *hugs* thanks chika.
@ Ali: Crossing fingers and toes she comes home soon.
Damn it Dana, give your Mom our sincerest condolences. :(
@ Sundae: I posted a thanks to Griff just as you posted your message ;p So it looks like I thanked everybody but you. *hugs* thanks chika.
Don't worry about that! I'm off being hyper-sensitive now I promise.
Oh Ali - how horrible.
Did she have her collar on when she went missing?
Is she chipped?
I'm still not over Dylan after three years :sniff:
My most sincere wishes for a happy ending for you.
Shit...I came in here to talk about my neighbour's kid and sex....(no, dont go there, I would NEVER!!!)....then I read that sex stuff that Ali is going through....weird.....
Anyway, I was sitting out the front on my lawn when my 15 yr old neighbour came and plonked down beside me...waffling his normal shit...and I wasnt really paying attention because I was thinking about how he was pissed (drunk) at the party I was at on Saturday night (his parents were there) and I wasnt very happy about that....anyway.
I hear "anal because she didnt want to get pregnant"...and I spat my Strongbow out my nose choking.....and asked him to repeat the story.
So, he's telling me that he's been seeing this 15 yr old girl for a little while and last weekend they had anal sex because she didnt want to get pregnant.....(in my head)...fuck, girls that age want anal sex?......and then one of her friends made some smart arse comment on facebook.
Friend of the parents tells girl's Dad and Dad finds out about anal sex Im mouth hanging open listening now..conversation on facebook how she's in a whole world of trouble.
The boy being ... if I know what - I was thinking *stupid* in my head......goes around to girl's house and talks to Dad. Admitting that they did it and why and that he hopes it wont be weird for him to be around girls house from now on W.T.F??
The reason he's telling me all this...he doesnt want to see that girl anymore and he's worried about how the Dad will react.
sorry, Im still stuck on the fact that this girl let you put it in her bum as a form of contraception
I think, if Dad didnt deck him when he turned up at the door and admitted to having sex with his Daughter, you will probably be OK not seeing her anymore.
I dont want to have this kinda shit happen in a few years.
Ali - Im glad Sally was found, did you pick her up this morning?
Well done with sex stuff, you always do the right thing and I hope I handle future scenarios with your tact!!
Dani - Im so sorry for the loss of your Mum's best buddy.
haha...that's a funny story. lol I haven't asked, so I could be wrong, but I'm pretty sure Aden and M weren't having anal. I actually don't really want to know if they were, not that I have anything against it, but just that at 15? Yeah, the thought would definitely never have occurred to me. lol
I'm sure you'll cope very well with whatever your boys toss up Ducky. You're a great Mum, and obviously a wonderful neighbour. ;)
I sort of want to live in Ducks neighborhood. It certainly is interesting.
And Ali - sooooooo glad you got Sally back!
yey! Sally's back :) So glad.
I sort of want to live in Ducks neighborhood. It certainly is interesting.
And Ali - sooooooo glad you got Sally back!
Its very boganesque, Bri.
Same boy (who is my fav even though he is a shit), is in the poo for smoking 'weed'.
Now, I adore his parents, but I have issues with a lot of things they do. They openly get fall down drunk and smoke weed in front of the two sons that live with them (12 & 15 - she has 4 older kids).....hell, they made a bucket bong last time I went over for a BBQ....but they have giving the boy an ultimatum ..."give up the smoking or you are off to rehab".
I agree that needs to happen, but...seriously....hypocritrical much?
15? Queensland?
Wait a minute.
This boy's name isn't Mav is it? :eyebrow: :lol: :headshake
Seriously, folks ... there're some serious role-model issues in that household. Telling the kid not to do exactly what you're doing in front of him? Duhhhh.
Oh an as mentioned previously, the age of consent in Queensland is 16, but for anal sex it is 18.
The age of consent for anal sex in MY household is FUCKING NEVER!!!
I notice cases of hypocritarseholeitis all the time now.
Guilty of it myself occasionally...."dont hit your brother...if you hit your brother once more, I'll clip you around the ear'.....err
My niece in law, to my Sister In Law..."T (her daughter) is not allowed to have chocolate or McDonalds"....as SHE has Chocolate for breakfast and eats McD's 3 times a week.
Mav? lol He's an angel. It's Aden that's the problem child. Already went through the dope smoking thing with him WHEN HE WAS 12!!!! Well and truly over it now though and his attitude towards dope is what I would call healthy as a parent.
Mav hadn't even kissed a girl till his now gf which is really sweet I think. I'm pretty sure Mav is so conservative (already) that he'd never even think of anal sex as something that might be fun. Aden on the other hand is likely to think about it and very likely give it a go if he could find a girl willing...which I would think would be difficult at 15, but apparently it's not if he heads up north a bit. lol
Oh, and thanks for the kind words about Sally. We're very happy to have her home. :)
I could probably get her number......
Hey, I went past 5000 posts.
Jeez you talk a lot of shit Ali!
haha...I wasn't the one who brought up the subject of anal sex. lol
"talk some shit"
"subject of anal sex"
lulz
Aden on the other hand is likely to think about it [anal sex] and very likely give it a go... which I would think would be difficult at 15, but apparently it's not if he heads up North a bit.
That's an interesting euphemsim.
I wonder if that's how Sheldon described it to his family. "I fancy
heading North a bit."
Well it actually means geographically speaking. As in Going north a few hundred km's to where Ducky lives cause the chicks are more 'open'...apparently...lol
I will start with fuck cancer. Learned today, shortly after the rents learned, that my dad's best friend for his whole entire life has cancer. Terminal. He will do chemo so to make him more comfortable. I know my dad and if he were in that situation I would have to be the kevorkian he counted on.
I'd rather absorb all the pain on earth than see my loved ones feeling it. This is not possible.
Meanwhile I keep thinking of growing up with this man, and his people, in our lives. Such a funny man, such a quietly sweet man. When he laughed, which was a lot with this crew, his eyes laughed.
So I raised a glass or two or 8 for a man who is almost an uncle, for his kids who are like cousins, only long since having gone to live their lives.
I hate this shit.
It's just the worst news to hear. I'm sorry about it all anon. Maybe there will be a miracle. Stranger things have happened. xx
Fuck cancer.
Sorry, anon.
gah.
Cancer fucks with us, we just fuck cancer back, fucker. So sorry anonymous.
*shakes head* such sadness. Sorry, Anon.
Fuck cancer.
Fuck cancer. Sorry anon. Fuckitt.
Anon I am so sorry.
Really good family men don't happen by every day.
And I know because I have them in my family and they have been hard to match.
And I read them here and they impress me.
So much love to you and friends and family.
I wouldn't fuck cancer with a dead dick when it eats good people.
Went through this very thing several months ago with one of Popdigr's friends. Leukemia.
Definitely sucks.
Fuck cancer.
Just saw anon's post, and wanted to offer condolences. :(
I'm so sorry anon.
:flower: for you
Went to the hospital yesterday. The baby's heart rate is a bit high, but they are not too concerned, but sent me home with the warning to come straight back if I don't feel any movement for more than a couple of hours. Also, she's in breech position, so that's not great either.
God I just wish this was over. :(
How much longer Ali? Are you having a c-section because of her being topsy turvy?
Just a few weeks now Razz. If she's still breech when I go into labour they'll do a C section. We'll just have to wait and see for now though.
paper towels
toilet paper
case of grape soda
case of lemon lime soda
two gallons whole milk
box of green burritos
bottle of creamer
bottle of mayonnaise
two loaves of wheat bread
tax
guess how much. highlight to answer.
$[COLOR="White"]76.34[/COLOR]
Oh Lord! Where do you shop????
I guessed $50 and I was rounding up. It might have helped to be a little more specific on the quantities, however. ;)
about $35 where I live/shop assuming the kitchen and bog roll were bought in bulk.
Well, Carrot survived his ordeal at the vets. He spent the day there pretty much. Dropped him in at a little after 8:30, walked away feeling a total traitor (left him his raggedy-cow toy to chew whilst he was waiting for the anaesthetic). Picked him up around 4pm.
The news is not as bad as I had feared and not as good as I had hoped.
He has a mild form of hip dysplasia. The joints aren't very badly malformed, nowhere near as bad as it can get, but nor are they quite right. The balls of the joints are slightly flattened at the head, and the sockets of the joints quite shallow.
I've seen what bad hip dysplasia can do and it's really horrible. I'm profoundly relieved that's not what he has to face. In some dogs the ball of the joint is barely bigger than the shaft, sometimes completely flat, like a little hammerhead. The socket can form so flat that there is no surround to the ball at all. And in the worst cases the two are actually at a slight distance from each other and not connecting at all as a joint, with muscle alone holding the two pieces together. At it's worst it is crippling.
The good news is that catching it at this age offers an opportunity to intervene whilst he is still growing and really strengthen the muscles around the joints. He'll be going for visits to the hydrotherapy pool to boost them. It won't make a massive difference to the next few years, but will hopefully payoff when he's a little older. What is done now has major implications for his quality of life past the age of 5 or 6.
He's fine. But it's worrying me a little. With shallow hipjoints he's at possible risk of dislocation if the joints are stressed. A fall or a bad landing could be a real problem. I have decided not to do agility classes with him (as I had considered doing once he hits a 1 year old), and will have to be a little cautious where I let him run free. Pilau was a little mountain goat and cuold always be relied upon to find a way up and over anything. Carrot has the same inclination, but when I think of some of the tumbles Pil took, I really don't like that thought for Carrot and his shallow hip joints.
Was so sad looking at his xrays. Flat on his back with his legs downwards, looked like a little human :p
Anyways. Yeah. A little upset at the thought of him having anything bad to contend with really.
for carrot - :apaw: of love
for carrot's human: :flower: of love and caring
We need a carrot smiley. probably not this one.
[ATTACH]40533[/ATTACH]
BigV-- groceries are my number one expense. I have been trying to eat beans, rice and corn/salsa mixture and skip meat but I MISS MEAT! Protein fills you UP and the beans/rice thing only makes me swell up and then feel hungry in half an hour. It's ridiculous how much money one person can spend at the grocery. Add up stuff like TP, cleanser, shampoo, and animal stuff and you're at 100.00 easily. It's teh sucketh. and it's only going to get worse with the drought. the farmers here say Isaac HURT them rather than helped them. I'm getting a new storm door and I am prepared to go to food banks when I have to pay for it. (Old Storm door is original wood from 1957 and has dry rot and been thru two major storms and no longer shuts. Must have a new one - not a luxury deal at all. The storms coming thru Ohio are getting really nasty and I have to have a new one. During last storm, the plastic in the "glass" section of the door cracked in four places).
PM me for my addy to google my house and see storm door from '57!
Thanks guys. Have passed on Cellar huggles to Carrot :)
But really, how can you spend that much on that BigV? Did you order in from Harrods? that's insane. Or are green burritos like $40, 'cause that's the only thing I had to guess on.
paper Towel $1.50
Bogroll $2
Soda $3 * 2 = $6
milk: $5 ($3.50 if you have an ALDI)
creamer ?$3
Mayo $3
Bread $5
that's like $25 plus your burritos. WTF?
Yeah, I was coming up with $50. Prices are higher here and probably in Seattle too. Depends on how big the packages of the paper towels and TP were, and also what green burritos are.
Green burritos are made entirely from money! That's why they cost so much.
Green burritos are made entirely from money! That's why they cost so much.
yeah, that's why I never buy them.
IF you buy the large quality TP it's around 14.00 here (the triple size Charmin Ultra strong stuff that lasts one person a month) IF you buy 12 rolls of paper towels, (which I never do) it's around the same. so that's nearly 30 dollars right there. It's better to buy in bulk on that stuff if you can as it's cheaper in the long run but I can't really afford to do that.
and as far as going to the food banks goes....well, it prolly won't get THAT bad. I'll just do soup and ramen for longer than I want!
eta: creamer here is around 3.99 and mayo is nearly five bux if you buy Hellman's and four if you buy store brand
so bulk paper towel adds 7 and bulk tp adds 13. so now $45. Those are definitely still greenback burritos
Soylent Green Burritos?
[ATTACH]40540[/ATTACH]
yeah, clod helped with the sauce
about $35 where I live/shop assuming the kitchen and bog roll were bought in bulk.
yes, paper products bought in bulk from Cash & Carry. This is the closest to a wholesale store I can get to. No fancy store anything, no carts only bulk carrying flats, cement floors, walk-in coolers and freezers, plenty of restaurant supplies, etc.
paper towels from Tork, 12 rolls, 210 2-ply sheets per roll $26.63
toilet paper , 20 rolls, $12.49
everything else was pretty cheap.
[ATTACH]40546[/ATTACH]
2-ply paper towels? What's that I don't even...
You can get 12 rolls of Bounty Select a Size (16 rolls if you use the smallest you can tear off) for like 15-16 bucks.
I love select a size, too.
See, these wholesale places are generally a rip-off and not the way to shop sensibly. Just because they sell bulk and look cheap doesn't mean they are. We found once we didn't need nappies any more they weren't saving us anything. And over $2 for a roll of kitchen paper is ridiculous (and probably environmentally unfriendly). And that TP is a ridiculous price too -are you wiping your arse on sheet gold?
A 12-pack of soda should be in the $3 range and I I thought homos were people too -they shouldn't be selling them at the cash-and-carry
2 gallons of homos, no less.
I've also never seen a 2 gallon jug of milk. Seattle must be like, another country!
Oh wait, maybe the paper towl is some sort of bondage thing, in which case I guess it would need to be stronger...... and maybe more absorbent
I saw on a package on google that they're 'advanced.'
Well hey, if a paper towel goes to college to try to better themselves, I have no problem with them being paid more.
I need brain bleach :eek:
2-ply paper towels? What's that I don't even...
You can get 12 rolls of Bounty Select a Size (16 rolls if you use the smallest you can tear off) for like 15-16 bucks.
I love select a size, too.
See, these wholesale places are generally a rip-off and not the way to shop sensibly. Just because they sell bulk and look cheap doesn't mean they are. We found once we didn't need nappies any more they weren't saving us anything. And over $2 for a roll of kitchen paper is ridiculous (and probably environmentally unfriendly). And that TP is a ridiculous price too -are you wiping your arse on sheet gold?
A 12-pack of soda should be in the $3 range and I I thought homos were people too -they shouldn't be selling them at the cash-and-carry
2 gallons of homos, no less.
I've also never seen a 2 gallon jug of milk. Seattle must be like, another country!
(from Amazon) Bounty Select A Size Paper Towels, 12 Mega Rolls
by Bounty
3.0 out of 5 stars See all reviews (7 customer reviews) | Like (0)
List Price: $39.95
Price: $21.99 ($1.83 / Item)
You Save: $17.96 (45%)
Sheets per roll: 154
Quantity: 12 rolls
Ply: 2
Color: White
Sheet size: 11" x 6"
Bounty's thick quilts offer super absorbency
One sheet keeps working on your mini-messes
12 super rolls = 22 Select-a-Size regular rolls
Individually wrapped rolls
-------
some arithmetic
-----------------
number of sheets * size of sheets * number of rolls = how much paper towels you're getting
(154 * 11 * 6 * 12) / price = cost per area of towel.
121968 sq inches of paper towel / 21.99 = 5546.55 square inches of towel per dollar
----------
(210 * 11 * 9 * 12) = 249480
249480 / 26.63 = 9368.38 square inches of paper towel per dollar.
The Bounty is almost twice as expensive.
------------
The soda is for a *case* not a twelve pack, so the price is in line with your expectation. Just generic soda, house brand. Probably comes from the same well as the name brand.
---------
re tp
-------
Charmin Ultra Soft, Double Rolls, 4 Count Packs [Amazon Frustration-Free Packaging]
by Charmin
3.9 out of 5 stars See all reviews (101 customer reviews) |
Like (27)
List Price: $46.51
Price: $31.54 ($0.79 / count) & this item ships for FREE with Super Saver Shipping. Details
You Save: $14.97 (32%)
Special Offers Available
In Stock.
Ships from and sold by Amazon.com in certified Frustration-Free Packaging. Gift-wrap available.
Size: 10-Count (Pack of 4)
also from amazon, this is a 40-roll-pack, so twice the number of rolls.
charmin 31.54/2= $15.77 per 20 rolls
cash carry 12.49 per 20 rolls.
I didn't bother to compare number of sheets per roll.
protesting too much. definitely paper-towel-porn
As an extreme couponer, I approve of V's math. Bulk shopping is all about unit pricing... sometimes it's better, sometimes it's not.
Grocery shopping is just so crazy expensive... can't wait until fall starts rolling around so I can get better coupon deals again to stock up. Sigh.
Plus he'll always be ready if clodfobble goes near a liquor store......
I'm just funnin' I buy in bulk too. But it's not really cricket to pose it as a regular shopping list and not mention that some items are luxury brands bought in bulk when asking people to estimate the cost.
It's like me saying "pasta" on the day I bought 50lb of the stuff because the sale was so good (I think I posted the recipt somewhere)
I was kidding too. For me, buying in bulk is an extra can of cream of chicken soup or a double pack of paper towels. Living alone and all. Plus I'm too lazy to plan far ahead. ;)
are you saying there's some luxury brands there? the milk is Darigold, kind of name brand, not "store brand". and the mayo is Best Foods, not generic... Nothing there is close to a luxury brand.
I didn't get any this trip, but I usually buy my Hershey's Chocolate Syrup there. Chocolate milk is practically on tap here. I buy the chocolate in a ten tin. A six pound can. And I probably have three or four empties in the basement at any given time. SonofV likes to joke with his friends after school by offering to give them some hand soap in their milk. wtf? It's because I transfer the chocolate syrup from the big can to various bottles small enough to fit in the refrigerator. The biggest one used to have hand soap in it.
I still maintain that most wholesale places are generally more expensive -but that's probably because I don't buy big name brands in the main (except for nappies and a few other things). Their own brands are usually pricey, but they are cheaper for big-name-brands. Have yet to visit the Costco that opened here this summer.
I usually go to Sam's Club once a month or so to stock up on things... but I also get bulk items whenever I can find a good couponing deal on them. It's a lot of math though... bleh
Ahh yes Sams club , how Much can you afford to save ??
Compared to Aussie pricess
paper Towel $1.50 .... Home Brand $2
Bogroll $2.... 6 Rolls of semi decent (your-finger-wont-go-through-at-the-wrong-time) $4
Soda $3 * 2 = $6.... 12 cans for around $6 Home Brand
milk: $5 ($3.50 if you have an ALDI) $2.89 for 3 Litres
creamer ?$3 ??
Mayo $3 Small squeeze bottle Home Brand $4
Bread $5 $1 per Loaf for crap, I pay $3 per loaf.
I feel like this could be a whole thread!!
The cheapest bread in my area is $1.29 / loaf
I've been splurging to buy sunbeam "queen sized" since we go through it so fast, that's $2.99 here
Milk is all the way up to $4.59/gal unless I go to the commissary, but most of you don't have access to those so I'm posting regular grocery store prices. (Mostly Food Lion, if you're wondering)
I have made a list of the items I normally buy at Sam's Club (I would much prefer Costco, but it is an hours drive from me) with the cost per unit or ounce or whatever, so that I can check whether the sales (with coupons or promotions) at the grocery stores I also shop are better or not.
I'm in the process of cross-referencing all my local grocery stores and pricing. Sam's club is about an hour's drive from here and the nearest costco is about 3 hours (so I've been told)...
Since I'm currently jobless I've turned my "job" into saving as much of the husband's paycheck as possible.
Do you live near an Aldis? Typically their prices cant be beat and all lot of the stuff they sell isnt bad at all.
No Aldi's near me (though I think there's one near my hometown) I've got Food Lion, Piggly Wiggly, Super Walmart, and Harris Teeter as options here. (As well as the commissary on base)
(from Amazon) Bounty Select A Size Paper Towels, 12 Mega Rolls
by Bounty
3.0 out of 5 stars See all reviews (7 customer reviews) | Like (0)
List Price: $39.95
Price: $21.99 ($1.83 / Item)
You Save: $17.96 (45%)
Sheets per roll: 154
Quantity: 12 rolls
Ply: 2
Color: White
Sheet size: 11" x 6"
Bounty's thick quilts offer super absorbency
One sheet keeps working on your mini-messes
12 super rolls = 22 Select-a-Size regular rolls
Individually wrapped rolls
-------
some arithmetic
-----------------
number of sheets * size of sheets * number of rolls = how much paper towels you're getting
(154 * 11 * 6 * 12) / price = cost per area of towel.
121968 sq inches of paper towel / 21.99 = 5546.55 square inches of towel per dollar
----------
(210 * 11 * 9 * 12) = 249480
249480 / 26.63 = 9368.38 square inches of paper towel per dollar.
The Bounty is almost twice as expensive.
OK, so just for interest this is what we are currently using:
http://www.meijer.com/s/meijer-essentials-2-ply-white-paper-towels-1-multi-pack-12-big-rolls/_/R-192189
I make that over 10K sq inch per dollar, plus I probably paid one or two dollars less than that because I always buy on sale. And I didn't have to shell out so much $ in one go to get that price. We tend to alternate between this and Aldi brand -which is a little more expensive but does the small sheet size hich means we use less, plus Aldi and Meijer are in different parts of town, so i shop where i am. In desperation I'll buy Walmart's cheapo stuff, but the quality is sub standard.
I cost out paper goods by use - which is by the sheet. I can get Pom paper towels for .00884 cents per sheet and Pom toilet paper for .00109 cents per sheet at Sam's Club. I generally like the quality better than store or generic brands and I really like having the larger quanities...it doesn't run out as quickly
Don't forget to ad in the cost of membership (and gas)
$40/year (Sam's Club) is not a lot for membership though, if I go 1-2 times a month ...say 18 times a year? It's $2.22 per visit, and with my gas-friendly Toyota Yaris, I hardly go through any gas to get there. I think it's worth it for us. :)
Oh yes, it certainly is for many, it's just a cost to include. How much do you spend each time you go? People here used to travel 30 minutes to go to Costco, they'd go maybe 4 times a year ($10/visit) and buy stuff that's only a little cheaper than locally. Now we have one here, I *may* join, I'mm'a take a guest-pass test run first. We've had a Sam's Club forever, but we let our membership go after Thor was potty trained. We probably broke even on the membership/savings, but it was so stressful because the staff were crap it wasn't worth it.
Last year I opened up their Discover/Members Card which gives me cash back. I use it for everything - gas, groceries, etc.- and pay it off every month. I earned the $40 fee for this year and I have already earned it for the next year. So anymore that doesnt play into it, but even when it did, I still came out ahead. I buy my chicken and hamburger in bulk and bag it up in smaller amounts to freeze. The price almost always beats out the grocery stores. I buy kitty litter, powder laundry detergent, and other cleaners in bulk too. I stay with their brand or, if they have it, ones that cost less.
And, my Sams isnt very far from me, but I tend to only go once a month to stock up. My bill normally stays under $100. Also, it is close to Aldis, so often I go to both in one trip. Aldis actually sells feta chesse and hummus now, and their produce is usually the best priced.
ooh Cat litter. I forgot that was a good deal.... (didn't have cats when we gave our membership up)
Wtf....when did the Upsetting you thread turn into the shopping channel?
Gods damn people I come here for misery and distress...
:p
I thought you hated shopping as much as I do.
Now you know why.
OK stupid fucking cats can forget about cheap litter. Whats upsetting me is the little shite howled outside my door about every 15 minutes from 6am this morning, then when I finally got up to throw him out, I pulled something in my back. Have been lying in bed icing it for two hours, can only just move, the bastard shite is still outside
My sister in law, who has been fighting pancreatic cancer for the last several years, died in her sleep last night. At home. Kind of caught me by surprise, because she'd been so close so many times before, and they had just released her from the hospital a week ago, and things were looking like they were slightly improving over how she had been for the last month.
Fuckin' cancer. :mad:
Damn. Sorry to hear that glatt.
Sorry for your loss glatt.
Yeah, buttfuck cancer in the mouth.:mad:
Thanks everyone. :)
Now I need to make up my mind about whether I'm going to her memorial service or not. She's actually my ex sister in law. She and my brother got divorced about 10 years ago. But it was a pretty good divorce, and I've seen her maybe 3 times since the divorce.
I liked her a lot. She was really cool. But she hasn't been a significant part of my life in about a decade. But her kids have (17 yo and 19 yo.) They are my niece and nephew and are family.
So on the "attend the service" side of the equation is that I'd like to be there for the service, and the niece and nephew would probably appreciate seeing me there
On the "don't attend the service" side of the equation is that I already have plans to go with my son on a scout camping trip this weekend, the service is on the other side of the country and it will take about 25 hours of travel time round trip to get there and back since I can't afford a last minute direct flight. There will be a ton of other people there, so my absence won't be glaring. Also, I recently noted that a moth ate my only suit, so I'd need to shop for at least a jacket or something. With airfare, hotel, and a new suit, the trip will put me back about $1k, which would be painful.
So really that's what's bugging me about all this. Do I go? I want to be there, but it's a huge pain.
There are only 3-4 more planned camping trips with my son before he leaves scouts, so it's not like there are an endless supply of camping trips. And I really enjoy camping with him and those other dads and their kids.
I think I've decided I'm not going, but I'm really torn about that decision.
I'm so sorry, glatt. :(
I think funeral services, or visitations, are for the living, the loved ones still here. Having said that, however, very often these things come up when something else important is planned. And it's a big distance to go; it's not like it's in town.
Could you send an arrangement, or cards to your niece and nephew? Maybe a phone call? I think in this circumstance that is more than acceptable and welcome.
And you and your son will relish those trips for the rest of your life: I bet your ex sis-in-law would want you to be able to do those things with your family. Life does go on.
And fuck cancer. :(
Don't go. Call them. They will understand.
Sorry for your loss, glatt.
And yeah, what Monster said.
Maybe you could call your niece and nephew and ask if they'd like to come spend some time at your place after everything is done and dusted? Use the money for that instead. I would think they'd understand, and probably even not really care if you're there or not anyway. They'll be in grief, and they still have their Dad, so he'll be the one they'll be leaning on. (I assume he's going) When it all comes down to it, there'll probably be a lot of people there if she was youngish and the kids will probably have friends go along to support them too.
Don't feel bad. Just let them know they're in your thoughts and that you'd love to see them as soon as they'd like to get together with you.
I called and had a really good talk with them. I'm not going, and it's fine.
Glatt, sorry for your loss, and glad that the niece and nephew are OK with you not going to the funeral. I think the idea of inviting them to come and visit you for a while is a good one.
My hand tremors have gotten worse recently, to the point that I feel I need to discuss it with my neurologist the next time I see him. Rationally, I'm pretty sure it's the same benign aspect of epilepsy that it's always been, and they are only worse right now because I'm not getting enough sleep (which in turn is because I am acting like a child and refusing to go to bed at the appropriate time, as if somehow tomorrow will be magically different and I won't have to get up at 5:45 after all.)
But.
The irrational hypochondriac part of me keeps shouting from the back that this is the first sign of early onset Parkinson's. I have it on both sides of my family--not early onset specifically, just regular old Parkinson's--but one of those cases is the uncle who used to only have mild epilepsy like me.
No doubt lack of sleep is making the anxiety worse too. Oh, and, I woke up with a sore throat, which is just pissing me off. I would go to bed right now, but Mr. Clod isn't home yet.
That would upset me too. Sorry, Clodfobble. I hope you're just tired. Go to bed as soon as the Mr. gets home.
Glatt,
a) I am sorry to hear about your ex sister in law's passing.
b) A moth ate your only suit? That must have been a big ass, hungry moth. It was probably a good thing you weren't wearing it at the time.
Clodfobble.
a) I am sorry about ur tremor. That sucks.
b) Just say NO to Parkinsons.
Go to the doc. Put your mind at ease Clod. I'm sure it's just lack of sleep, so also, GO TO BED!
[YOUTUBE]OaTO8_KNcuo[/YOUTUBE]
now, calls from bill collectors, asking me my number, my info, and "are you married to a mrs tink?"
fuck. no. stop bothering me about this shit, I don't want to have anything to do with mrs tink, leave me alone.
Oh man, that sucks. Those phone calls are never really going to go away until she pays the debt, or dies. Mr. Clod's brother has tons of bills in collection, and about every 1-2 years, the debt gets sold to a new collection agency, and they diligently re-run all the potential paths to find him, including us. We tell them he's never lived with us, and we haven't heard from him in years and honestly wouldn't know where to find him, and they are polite and cross us off the list... but then a year later, the calls start again.
My hand tremors have gotten worse recently, to the point that I feel I need to discuss it with my neurologist the next time I see him. Rationally, I'm pretty sure it's the same benign aspect of epilepsy that it's always been, and they are only worse right now because I'm not getting enough sleep (which in turn is because I am acting like a child and refusing to go to bed at the appropriate time, as if somehow tomorrow will be magically different and I won't have to get up at 5:45 after all.)
But.
The irrational hypochondriac part of me keeps shouting from the back that this is the first sign of early onset Parkinson's. I have it on both sides of my family--not early onset specifically, just regular old Parkinson's--but one of those cases is the uncle who used to only have mild epilepsy like me.
No doubt lack of sleep is making the anxiety worse too. Oh, and, I woke up with a sore throat, which is just pissing me off. I would go to bed right now, but Mr. Clod isn't home yet.
Get your sleep and talk to your Doc. Don't screw around with this stuff.
SonofV's epilepsy had become merely a historical fact for a couple years. That's the timeframe the doctors set for seizure free activity in order to consider stopping his medication. He went off the medications according to the doctor's instructions. Another couple years passed with no seizures. Then, another seizure about a year ago. Back on the medicine and during the followup, the only definite causal factor in his situation was fatigue. Getting a teenager to bed early (and up early) is not an easy thing, but it was "doctor's orders". He had a couple more seizures (but none recently) and every time he'd stayed up late the night before. It's a strong correlation.
I'm no doctor. I am not a doctor. But, lack of sleep does increase the risk of seizures in my experience. I hope you take good care of yourself. You're the person in the best position to get you to bed at a good time. Perhaps you can enlist Mr Clod in enforcing bedtime?
I would so enforce her bedtime...
Hold it, that should have been posted anonymous. I didn't really say that; I was just thinking it.
The biggest problem is this new phone. I can lay in bed, and watch shit on Netflix right here in my hands. I get all ready for bed, and then I see my tempting little phone sitting on the nightstand, and I think, "Man, that show is so funny..." and I'm a goner. Like I said, I'm acting like a child and I know it. So far my solution has been to find ways to speed up the morning process so I can sleep later. Which does technically count as getting more sleep.
Charge the phone on the kitchen counter overnight.
Sure, that's what an adult would say. :) I did resist temptation last night, you'll all be so proud and interested to know. But in unrelated events (also belonging in the upsetting you thread, actually,) we've figured out our bus driver and monitor this year completely suck, and are shouting at the kids all the time. Minifob's off the afternoon bus for good as of today, since there's an older, more aggressive kid at that time who guarantees problems, but I'm close to pulling them both off the morning bus too, since that would give me another 25 minutes in the morning. Though it would mean I'd have to put on real pants.
House dress and slippers are time-honored, traditional apparel for dropping off the kids at school
Diz has some sort of paw/ claw infection.
We've been treating it with salt water since the weekend, but he's seriously limping now.
This probably means his second trip to the vet in as many months. I am still paying the 'rents back for his cat flu.
Looks like the Glasgow GTG won't happen this year for me.
Which will hurt. Badly.
But my boy has to come first.
Awww, poor Diz! I hadn't seen this til now. How's he doing? Did he have to go to the vets?
I came in here to have a moan.
I'm ever so slightly upset to be on the treatment trail with Carrot so soon. Doesn't seem five minutes since I was back and forth for this and that therapy, this and that scan, with Pilau.
Poor Carrotchops. He's so young and we're already talking about trying to push back the arthritis to later in his life and hoping to avoid hip surgery.
He had his second tip to the animal rehab centre today. Second go on the underwater treadmill too. Which is kind of cool. Carrot likes it, and seems to have got to grips with what is expected of him really quickly. We're not in the pool yet. Don't know if that will come into it at some point.
At present the goal is to try and correct his walking. He needs to learn how to walk properly. He's pushing his back feet too far forward, under his belly as he walks, and that means he is unstable, is creating additional impact within the joint, and isn't developing normal muscle tone around his hips and bum. Instead he's taking the strain of movement on his back and abdominal muscles.
The sensitiviy I I'd detected around his back end is not a sign that his hips are painful, but his back is. He's almost certainly been dealing with low level pain for quite a while. My poor little boy. To try and avoid introducing him to painkillers so young, we're going to try acupuncture. It seemed to help Pilau quite a lot with his bad back, just loosens it all up a bit. Hopefully that will help.
We have exercises to do for homework and he'll be going to the rehab centre twice a week for the next few weeks then dropping to once a week, then hopefully once a month.
For the next few weeks whilst he's building up those muscles and relearning how to walk, he's only allowed lead walks, no free running. And no careening around the field with other dogs, wheeling and dodging and changing direction suddenly...and being bowled over or pinned down at the back by bigger dogs.
I also have to train him not to go up onto his back legs. Which is a bit of a bitch, frankly. Carrot is typical of his breed and one thing most beardie owners will tell you is that their dogs spend half their time up on two legs!
Ach damn. Here I am again on the worry-go-round.
So sorry to see two tales of woe about Cellar pets. Sending healing vibes!
Make that three.
Pearl has been suffering cardiac arrhythmia events. She lies down and loses consciousness, because her heart beats irregularly. She is down and out for about a minute, breathing hard, and then takes five or ten minutes to recover.
This is a well-known thing in dogs, and she may survive because she has been given a new round of medications, but she has lost it at least once every day for the last four days.
It is her last innings for sure, and it is terrible. I mourn her every time, even though I know it will not make the final mourning any less painful.
This is the girl who has stayed with me as the others have left.
Aww damn !!!
Cellar pets Get Betterer !!!!
So sorry, it's so sad to know fur friends are suffering ... wishing everyone the best. Hoping things turn out for the best.
:apaw: and :heartpump for all our cellar pets.
Oh, and a :flower: too.
Oh UT, that's so hard for you. Pearl is such a sweetie! My thoughts are with you.
Ach damn UT, I feel for you, I do. It's a hard place to be, seeing it coming from a distance. And it is natural and helpful (I think) to future pace grief in that way. Almost like trying it out a little at a time.
But right now, she's still with you. And she's a happy little dog, despite the health problems. Hard as it is, try not to let the sadness of what is coming eclipse the happiness that's still there.
*hugs* to you both.
Sorry about Pearl, UT.
Some good advice above though.
Today I am upset about a real life issue (ie not something that happened on the Cellar or involves any Dwellar).
I tried to talk to someone today about health issues and concerns. Only to get a rather hostile response. I knew about most of it, but they had kept some things back. I always ask about their health and have a good idea about appointments and procedures coming up. So to get a passive-aggressive "attack" when I was trying to keep up to date was pretty horrible.
I didn't let it escalate of course. The person in question does have more to worry about than me, and has been hiding more problems and for longer. But I came away bruised and feeling worse about myself emotionally. My only consolation is that they felt a bit better afterwards. At least better than they would have done if I had shouted, "Why didn't you fucking tell me, I'm not psychic!"
I didn't get on to my own (minor) health worries.
Didn't seem the right time to raise them.
And reassurance and sympathy were obviously Sold Out.
Passive agressive is always horrible, so sneaky. I hope you're doing OK, SG. How's Diz?
Kudos to you, SG. Maybe that person couldn't help taking misery out on you today, for reasons you don't know. It takes a big heart to take the brunt like that. But please don't feel worse about yourself. Any imputation that you should've been psychic was wrong, and another time you could quietly call him/her on it.
we love you Sundae. ''''Lots!
Seems like almost everyone's got something to be upset about lately. Not a lot I can really say to add to the rest, but I hope things turn out for the best. xxx
Cheers people. Today I feel much better about it of course. Last night was the trough.
Diz had his qualified all-clear from the vet yesterday. After a course of antibiotics, painkillers and surgical wash for bathing. Although I am warned to keep an eye on it, as it's not completely healed, so the wash is to continue and he mustn't go out (the easiest part of the routine to follow).
Luckily the boy is such a gannet that giving him pills is never a problem. Break them in half, roll them in Philedelphia and the only worry is he will bite my fingers off thinking they are part of the deal.
Still concerned about December though, financially. I have to make a decision in the next two weeks whether I can come or not, as you'll need to make alternate plans re accommodation and selling my ticket. All the money I saved went to pay off Diz's vets bills, and I still owe more, as well as having to find money to pay for Christmas dinner. Have applied all over the place for Christmas work but nothing back as yet.
you'll need to make alternate plans re accommodation and selling my ticket.
seeing as I already have the bitch of the year/decade award on here.. Shouldn't it be
you making plans to sell
your ticket? And the accommodation thing... you spearheaded it, you have responsibility. Step up!
Yeah, ya know, just not fucking helpful really.
Not your job to police how Sundae interacts with her friends. Speaking as one of those friends, I don't much appreciate the intervention.
um...er...I think Sundae meant the accommodations would have to be changed since there would be two and not three and 'selling my ticket' is something that she herself is planning on doing as in "should I sell my ticket or not?"
that's how I read it.
Yeah you're right I'm sure. Sorry. I shouldn't be interacting with anyone right now.
I bought the ticket for Sundae and gave it to her as a late birthday present. It's not helpful to make Sundae feel any worse then she does already when all she's trying to do is be financially responsible by paying back her parents for cat meds. I'll sell it if I have to but I'd rather keep a hold of it in case Sundae can cone to Glasgow after all.
Sent by thought transference.
Eva is constipated. Poor little thing. It's upsetting her more than me really, but it means she's not really settling very well this morning. Oh well. I'm sure it'll all come out sooner or later. Probably in a massive nappy blast. lol
Eva is constipated. Poor little thing. It's upsetting her more than me really, but it means she's not really settling very well this morning. Oh well. I'm sure it'll all come out sooner or later. Probably in a massive nappy blast. lol
Pic's or it didn't happen.
lol...if you want a pic of baby poo you can have it. lol Don't say you weren't warned! haha
FUCK CANCER!
goddamn it. my great bud and flying friend. liver. fuckinsonofabitch.
So sorry to hear that, plthi ... damn. Sorry.
Sorry, man. Fucking Cancer!
found out on the way home today. knew strange things were afoot at the circle k for the last few months but found out for certain today. it's advanced. unconfirmed source said stage 4. but that was not a too reliable source. talked to my old manager today and got the jist. now, the last 3 or 4 flights we've done, i have taken over flying to let him rest. hell, the first time i flew his new plane (with the barrel rolls? i'm not looking for them now to post a link to the vid) he asked me to land. hell i passed it off as air sick. nope. that was the initial growth on his liver starting to take it's toll.
been 4 months since then and he's lost probably 35-40 pounds.
my dad was taken back in '04 from liver cancer. i know it can be either fast and done or long and painful.
i hope for a miracle.
Well fuck fuck fuck the fuck out of cancer. Dammit. So sorry plt.
goddammit.
so sorry man, :comfort:
Shit. That's rough. *hugs*
Fuck cancer.
Cancer - it's better not to have it.
sorry for your pal. :(
This old dude in my cooking class emailed me today to tell me all about how he thinks my class sucks. I know he's wrong, but I'm seriously bummed. I wrote a long email apologizing for his misunderstanding about what the class would cover, and offered him a refund if he wants it. I hope he takes it, because I do not want to have to teach in front of the crotchety old bastard for the rest of the session.
I don't wish to channel Mitt Romney, but...
You can fire a customer too.
If he takes his money and leaves, great. Out of sight, out of mind. If he doesn't, fire him.
Some men just want to watch the sausages burn.
If he's really a crotchety old man you have no chance to please him NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO!
cut your loses and give yourself a break.
it's funny how 100 people can tell us we're good at something and ONE person can make us doubt ourselves.
You're awesome, Clod. Fuck that fucking fucker.
This old dude in my cooking class emailed me today to tell me all about how he thinks my class sucks. I know he's wrong, but I'm seriously bummed. I wrote a long email apologizing for his misunderstanding about what the class would cover, and offered him a refund if he wants it. I hope he takes it, because I do not want to have to teach in front of the crotchety old bastard for the rest of the session.
Seriously. Yeah. refund him, thank him for his "feedback" and move on.
There's the old 1/3 rule: a third of the class will love it, a third will hate it, and a third will be lukewarm. Of the third that hate it, a third of them will be douchebags.
You're awesome, Clod. Fuck that fucking fucker.
YEAH! Ride on him WITH CLEATS!
Yeah, dude replied to my nice professional email. What he actually did was make in-line comments, highlighted in red. It was nothing but argumentative bullshit like "I never used the word X." He informed me that he would not be sitting through the last two classes, but does not want his money back because he would like to still receive the followup email I send after each class referencing all the websites and other things mentioned that day. Win-win for me!
I'm assuming this is a GFCF cooking class and not more of your white trash grasshopper pie tornado cake cooking class. That might account for his crankiness. The whole IBS thing, I mean. Not the lack of recipes involving mini marshmallows ensconced within lime green jello.
This morning, my 21 year old daughter and 18 year old son got into an altercation and the girl called the police. I am such a proud daddy!
And I have to have a wisdom tooth extracted at 3pm!
Fuck life.
At least the extraction won't interfere with my atrial ablation on Nov.9.
Wow, that's heavy, Spexx. Does the 21-year-old live with you too, or just the 18-year-old? Nobody actually got hurt, right?
:comfort:
Eye luvz ya, Spexx. :eyeball:
They're adults, right?
Take care of yourself Spexx. I hope everything turns out well.
^whs^
Take care of yourself. All the best on Nov. 9th.
Wow, that's heavy, Spexx. Does the 21-year-old live with you too, or just the 18-year-old? Nobody actually got hurt, right?
Thanks, all. Nobody got hurt, but he fucked up her bedroom door.
Sounds like fixing the bedroom door should be top of his agenda ... it's the least that's due to you, considering he's an adult who messed up a door in YOUR house.
Just thoughts from someone who's been there ... ymmv
They are old enough to act like Adults , ( not squabbling kids )
Treat them as such ,
oh and he gets to fix the door ,
at 18 and 21 unless they are in school they should be paying rent ,
And if any thing like this happens again ALL their stuff would be packed and in a pile for them to pick up as they leave .
Just My Humble Opinion
That reads like poetry, zippyt.
In complete agreement.
If it helps any, Spexx, that kind of thing used to happen at my house when I was growing up all the time.
Once I chased my little sister with a kitchen knife intent on killing her.
We're friends now.
good luck with all the health stuff. What is it with this group? are we getting OLD?????
Weird...We must have the same little sister.
And neither of you cut the little stinker. Ya wimps.
I have Scars from my big sister
My bro's family dog died. Old age. She was an amazing chocolate lab and was in good health until she wasn't, which is what you hope for your pets anyway. Almost one year ago exactly it was the same with my Gaines.
Bless the innocent creatures who enrich our lives, and RIP you very good girl. :(
Bless the innocent creatures who enrich our lives, and RIP you very good girl. :(
Amen. Sorry to hear of the loss of such a good fur-friend, infi. Reminds me of my beautiful chocolate lab who died almost two years ago after a not-long-enough time being the most gentle, best-natured sweet girl ever. RIP good girls.
Aww. So sad when they go.
Not so far off the one year mark for my Pilau either. Feels weird knowing Christmas is round the corner. My first Christmas without Pilau. And my first with Carrot.
Had a serious bringing-up-short today with the ex. I've allowed him to come here and be present at some medical appointments while I was having so much trouble getting surgery arranged etc. He was respectful, maintained boundaries, was very helpful. I've been grateful. He has literally made it possible, at times, for me to get from one day to the next.
But today the agenda came out. He wants to get remarried during the holidays this year, either in December or at New Year's, depending on what's better for taxes!! And wants me to 'repay' him $$$ for what he considers to be an inequity in our settlement. And wants me to take on expenses for the kids that he considers 'not school-related'.
Now it feels like his help has just had a price-tag slapped on it: remarriage at the first possible moment. And messing around with our settlement, and demanding that I take on expenses that we agreed would be his ...
With my temporary alimony I can take on the expenses, that was the whole point of the alimony. But I am so upset. I accepted his help honestly, telling him I didn't feel anything for him but gratitude for his help, and specifically nothing romantic. Until now he respected all the boundaries. And now this. I told him no to everything and he left in a huff. This isn't the end of it. I've spent the day unable to focus, having to write two online quizzes and do a ton of academic stuff that didn't get done.
You were right, xoxoBruce. You were right.
Goddamnit. Nobody is worth trusting, not friends, not ex's.
I'm sorry to hear I was right.:(
Addendum - our settlement hasn't even been properly finalized, due to the lawyer's incompetence. The guy never sent me the quit-claim deed for our property, and never did the papers for splitting the pension. At the moment I'm 'up' in my ex's view because the property is worth more than the pension. But they aren't linked; my ex put a number on the property and offered me half of that. It's a little inflated in today's market but won't be in a few years. The pension has done the same as all pensions in recent years and isn't as much as the property, but that's not the point - they aren't linked.
The incompetent lawyer isn't the one I consulted in private; I need to contact MY lawyer now and get his help in enforcing the settlement, clearly. Get the quit-claim deed done, get the pension split, so there aren't any muddied waters. Letting go of the property is a wrench, as I mentioned before - it was always much more MY place, my woods, my gardens, my place (except for the perfect house). But it isn't worth my freedom.
Freedom is scary, though. I know others here are going through the same thing. I don't know whether, in a year and a half, I'll have a job or health insurance. I may be uninsured with cancer. I may have no job to go to, or a job that fails to provide either the insurance I need or the income to pay my medical expenses. I can't return to Canada instantly; I'll have to write Board exams and get licensed, which will take at least a year. I wouldn't have insurance there for at least three months after being physically present; so a minimum of fifteen months uninsured. And then there's the issue of having insurance but no care.
So where do you turn when you've done everything you were supposed to all your life, and paid your dues, tried your best, and still everything crashes and burns? I'm not the only one. What do people do?
Lawyers? Don't you have one in-house now?
I suppose. :neutral: But he's not exactly objective. He's already at the point of never speaking to his father again, and conflicted because he needs a little financial help for the next few months in order to meet expenses in DC until his promotion comes through (tiny apartment, minimal expenses beyond rent, but it's DC and his salary is entry-level). So far my ex has been providing that help; I can do it, as I mentioned, if the alimony continues for the next couple of years. I don't want to pull the kids into this, though. Not fair.
Ah, yeah, good point. Had forgotten that. I was thinking of sic-ing him onto your current lawyer.
That would be a possibility.
At this point I'm having trouble thinking ahead. There's something demoralizing about being found not good enough - not worth the effort - on one hand, and worth only as much as it takes to keep an estate together, on the other. Makes it tempting to just chuck the game altogether.
Hmm, so the choices are...
Acquiesce to his [STRIKE]demands[/STRIKE] requests, and feel financially secure while you beat the cancer and achieve your academic/professional goals.
Or, get a pitbull lawyer and stick to your plan, by making him stick to the agreement, and risking have everything blow up in your face.
Of course the first option, putting him back in control, may result in him pressuring you(or at least trying to), to give up your professional goals, preferring to have you safe at home away from bad influences... at least long enough to rearrange his finances. Even if he allowed you to continue, you'd have the stress of having failed to make the break you wanted, plus almost certain the stress you felt before you made the break.
The second option gives you the stress of fighting for what was previously supposed to be settled, and the possibility of not being physically strong enough to finish school/licensing. In other words, failure.
Looks like either way it won't be easy, so I guess it comes down to whether making the break was necessary, or just looked like a better option. How bad do you want it, what will you risk to try?
Well after all that thinking out loud (blovating) I wish I had some sage advice. But it looks to me like you're the only one that can make the decision.:o
Oh Orthodoc, I wish I had some sage advice, too. You are in my thoughts - I wish you the clarity to see what you need to do and the strength to carry out your decisions.
What the others have said. Sorry things have got so damned difficult, honey. Whatever your decision we'll still be here to provide a collective shoulder and ear.
*hugs*
I wish I could help in some tangible way-all this bullshit you have to go thru and being so sick on top of it!
Love rays your way, orthodoc. :flower:
Hmm, so the choices are...
Acquiesce to his [STRIKE]demands[/STRIKE] requests, and feel financially secure while you beat the cancer and achieve your academic/professional goals.
Or, get a pitbull lawyer and stick to your plan, by making him stick to the agreement, and risking have everything blow up in your face.
Of course the first option, putting him back in control, may result in him pressuring you(or at least trying to), to give up your professional goals, preferring to have you safe at home away from bad influences... at least long enough to rearrange his finances. Even if he allowed you to continue, you'd have the stress of having failed to make the break you wanted, plus almost certain the stress you felt before you made the break.
The second option gives you the stress of fighting for what was previously supposed to be settled, and the possibility of not being physically strong enough to finish school/licensing. In other words, failure.
Looks like either way it won't be easy, so I guess it comes down to whether making the break was necessary, or just looked like a better option. How bad do you want it, what will you risk to try?
Well after all that thinking out loud (blovating) I wish I had some sage advice. But it looks to me like you're the only one that can make the decision.:o
Yeah ... this diagnosis changed a lot. I needed to leave, I was self-destructing otherwise. Too unhappy for too long. It wasn't just a better option. But here I am, alone, with health insurance for only two years and who knows after that whether I'll ever get it again? (If Romney gets in, the answer to that is clear.)
I was starting to toy with the idea that the ex and I could be friends, could maybe go on a few trips as friends, share some things. He's the devil I know (less scary than taking on devils I don't) and as long as he kept on as he was, it would've been feasible. It's when old patterns and behaviors show up, like the fanatical control over money thing, and the desire to have life arranged to his convenience (my work included), that my spirits drop and I don't know that this can work.
If I go it alone I may fail totally. I may get really sick later in chemo and lose time/lose my job; I may have a recurrence within 18 months (lots of women do), and be without insurance right when I need more chemo; I may really crash and burn.
Is it wrong to return to the property that's really MINE, take comfort in that, and try to keep my boundaries up? It's obviously going to be an ongoing battle. And the issue of having worked so hard to get away, only to get sucked back in.
It's all too much. I don't think I can make this decision tonight. It's just depressing that the facade only lasted such a short time. Guess it's better to know early on, like with my 'friend' who turned out not to be one.
Is it wrong to return to the property that's really MINE, take comfort in that, and try to keep my boundaries up? It's obviously going to be an ongoing battle. And the issue of having worked so hard to get away, only to get sucked back in.
No. There is no right or wrong, beyond being forced/coerced into doing what you don't want to.
Is there anyway to establish Canadian residency, like buying property, or renting an address, without/before actually moving there?
Is there anyway to establish Canadian residency, like buying property, or renting an address, without/before actually moving there?
No. You must be physically present (proven by documents, eg passport stamps etc.) for at least 3 calendar months; you can't be away more than 30 days out of the first 6 months, either. To maintain eligibility for OHIP you must be present at least 153 days/year. Government staff decide your date of eligibility after examining your papers. In general, access to an OHIP card is jealously guarded. It's a photo card that must be updated every so often, and every time you move. Failure to update it means it'll show as invalid when it gets swiped at the hospital, and that means you're uninsured.
You are expected to carry private insurance to cover the waiting period, to cover all non-covered services (eg physio, medications, eye exams, etc. - the list expands year by year), and to cover medical costs while traveling. I will/would have more difficulty getting private insurance there than here. There are no policies in place to prevent cherry-picking. With my health issues, I wouldn't get coverage.
Eta - you have to prove that Ontario is your primary residence too, not just one of your residences. Ontario driver's license, pay stubs, copies of Ontario tax returns, etc.
heya ortho...
I have a question. your ex, did he suggest that he wants to remarry **you**??
Ah, I see I didn't actually make that clear in my first post ... yes, it's *me* he wants to remarry asap.
Things would be so much simpler if he had someone else in mind and just wanted to get the settlement finalized. :yelsick:
Marry him!!!! Then Gravdigr, Busterb, and I can take on a little trip to the old sewage lagoon.
Of course I am just kidding, in the case he comes up missing or something.
Of course you're kidding. But thank you. :)
If you had Canadian citizenship I'd so marry you in a heartbeat. Heck, I might even ask you if you wanted to. ;)
Seriously, Ortho, stay away from him at all costs. Rent a friend, Join a church or something. I hear Christians love to get all up in people's bizniss.
Good vibes to you.
Heh - first time anyone's wanted me for my Canadian citizenship. :p:
I'm so frustrated tonight - lost track of the fact that my vehicle registration was up for renewal and discovered it expired Oct. 31! I never, never lose track of things like that. I keep worrying about getting chemo-brain. :( I did the online stuff but also have to call my insurance agent for a new card, as that expires Dec. 1. And perfect storm, my license expires Nov. 11. I did the online thing to get a photo card but - really? - a driver's license photo while I'm having chemo, wearing a wig. Well, that'll be fun to show the state troopers for the next five years. :cool: And I have to go back to PA to get it because my insurance is still in PA (insurance agent said it was cool since I was coming back ... don't know if that's true now, but that's my story at the moment). Wonder if I can play the cancer card on this one ... somehow I think the DMV people are just not going to be sympathetic.
My second chemo is tomorrow and I'll be alone for it, which is ok, but I have SO much academic stuff to get done literally by tomorrow, I'm back to pulling all-nighters. And sleep through chemo, maybe? I don't seem as efficient as I used to be and I hate to ask for extensions. Hate it. I want to rock these courses and come out the other side celebrating.
I won't have the Neulasta shot this time, which is good and bad. Good because the worst of the bone pain shouldn't happen; the really bad stuff, my onco told me, was the shot. Bad because I'll go truly neutropenic this time and be at risk of getting something nasty and ending up in hospital. Everybody risks this, I guess. Just scary because I do clinics all next week and could pick up anything. It's not as bad as doing Peds or Infectious Disease but still a risk.
And other upsets that seem worse tonight - probably the steroids making things seem worse - but. I want to rock my MPH and be as on top of things as I've been the past two weeks, and I can see it all slipping away. I'm so upset tonight, I'm playing my Angry Sad Music playlist. :(
One good thing ... the Affordable Care Act will continue in force. Thank every force in the universe I can imagine, and those I can't imagine.
A cow orker...one of the aforementioned folks vying to see how fast they could get their heads up the new leader's ass, threw me under the bus late this afternoon. Wrote me a scathing email (about an issue he was just as much at fault for as I was) and copied the new leader. Of course, I wrote back about my part...but I know how that works around here.
He'll probably get me fired and that's what I don't get. We're all under stress from these crazy changes and what I would have done would be to give it a day, sleep on it, let's talk about it tomorrow, you and me. That's how I treat 'friends.'
I am finding fewer and fewer reasons to bother on this earth. I have nothing left to give, and I have nothing left that I am. I could go on the road with butcher knives and charge people 10 dollars to stab me in the back. At least I'd have some money before I died.
It's taking everything I have to hold on. All the stuff that's happened in my life (much I've not shared here) in the last few weeks, and now this. Dirty Rotten Scoundrel. I'll be interested to see how the racial issues play out here. Because I'll bet you it will.
What I've learned is diversity means nothing. You can only be you, but I should never be me.
It sux when you get done over by someone you trust anon, and it may be the last straw for you, but things will get better. If not, just get yourself a new job. Surely someone with your skills wouldn't find it too hard?
Chin up. You'll get there.
Ortho, that all sux too, but there is an end in sight for you, so just keep on keeping on. It will all be over soon and better days will follow.
Sorry, Anonymous. You don't need that stress. Hopefully his email won't be given any weight.
Maybe, just maybe, his email will backfire on him. I hope so. Horrible when that goes on. I'm sorry this is happening on top of everything else.
...a scathing email (about an issue he was just as much at fault for as I was) and copied the new leader.
So right off the bat in your new environment, you are handed a way to judge
the maturity of your new leader... the sender just may get to be judged too.
You know the old saw: Problems = Opportunities for the well informed and well prepared
Semi crazy people who have a kernel of a good point and manage to twist it all around into something that can no longer be discussed rationally.
While driving down the highway, truck and trailer with cattle we went by a house and in the driveway a girl [ sub human asshole] was whipping a beagle with the end of the leash. I could not stop, it would have been too dangerous with cargo but I so wanted to whip her with that dog lead and ask her how she liked it... [fuming still]
No one was there on the way back it might have gotten ugly... >:(
email fallout report desired
I'm bummed out by a debt collector that sued me last week 3 days before I was leaving for Australia. Back about 5 years ago when I was taking care of my parents in Atlanta I quit paying on a Sears credit card when they raised the interest rate to 35% for no apparent reason other then I had settled some other credit cards with the lenders for less then the original amount and I guess they saw it on my credit report. I tried to work out a settlement with Citibank which did the Sears cards but they wouldn't cut me a deal so I just blew them off.
About 2 years later I see this big debt buyer, LNVN Funding had bought the bad debt and about every 3 months or so I would get a letter from some dickwad lawyer claiming to represent them and that a law suit was imminent. So I would send them a "debt validation" request by certified mail and they would never contact me again.
Well, I must have missed the letter from one lawyer because I found out that a law suit had been filed for failure to pay a debt. So the day before I flew to Australia I had to hire an attorney who specializes in this kind of stuff and have him deal with the legal mumbo jumbo. He says there is a pretty good chance that either they will withdraw their suit as they most likely don't have the needed documentation for the debt or that if I do have to pay it will be something like 25-30% of the original debt. He also said if he can play the legal rope a dope until April 2013 the debt will be past the time they can go after it which is 4 years in Texas. It's costing me $1500 which kind of sucks but if they will be gone for good it will be worth it.
Hey, I'm in Australia and the motto her is "No Worries, Mate!"
Another old friend passed away suddenly, unexpectedly, yesterday morning. I'm not sure yet whether it was a heart attack or an asthma issue.
Sometimes things make so sense at all.
Thanks. There has been a recent wave of loss in my life and my peripheral life: people I've known for years, friends of the family, a family pet...
I will be very trite in saying that we never know and each day is a gift. But all of this pain and suffering (and also the pain for those of you who are dealing with medical issues) makes me think long and hard about our meaning and purpose: not a good place for my head to be.
Tell your loved ones you love them. Tell them today.
Sorry IM. Its been similar for me. Friends and people MY age are dying? WTF?
How can that be? I... I... I... but I don't feel almost 50. :(
I'm so sorry, IM. Your advice is good, not trite.
Sorry IM. What Classic said. Once you hit 50 (or in IM's case, the 18th anniversary of her 29th birthday) people begin to drop out of the race or get sidelined. The rest of us gotta keep going.
Auntie Margeret passed away yesterday a few weeks after being diagnosed with a very aggressive cancer. I wasn't particularly close toher, I've seen her maybe four times in the last two decades. Spoken a few times on Fb. She wasn't my blood relative, and she technically stopped being my aunt when she and Uncle Ron divorced. But...made me feel sad.
She was a nice lady. Life hadn't been terribly kind to her. Nor terribly unkind. But she was a nice lady, and her loss will hit my cousins hard.
The whole thing is so fucking unnerving. What with Stella Christmas before last. Saw my cousins going through it then. Now Margeret. Seeing another set of cousins go through it. It's like something is stalking our parents. Scares me.
Sorry for your losses, infi and Dana. :(
It's like something is stalking our parents. Scares me.
Exactly. Lost an uncle a couple years ago, and now my father in law is in a nursing home. That generation is starting to drop off. Hope it spares my parents for a while.
Lost my Dad in 2009 and that was hard, but losing Mum will be like losing half of myself.
It appalls me that the very best case scenario is that I will lose her.
With Dad having his "funny turns" - still undiagnosed - but more importantly his Alzheimers, I don't know how long I'll have him for either. The real him I mean. He's worried he'll drop dead, we're more worried about what will be left as he lives.
It's been caught early as far as these things go, but there is no reversing the process. Only slowing down.
They've drawn up all the legal papers suggested by the solicitor. Cost £3k.
My brother has power of attorney. In the mean time Dad is still spending money and completely forgetting he did so. He signed up for 3 x cases of wine @ £45 each the other month. Talked into it by a salesperson. No idea when, but they had a record of it. In their defence they weren't out to fleece him, he'd been a member of their wine club for about three years but had agreed with Mum they could no longer afford it. Nice lady on the phone offered him a returning customer deal. He forgot all about it, even when the first case arrived. Genuinely baffled as to why it was sent. Mum cancelled the account, explaining the situation and asked to have them removed from the calling list.
There will be more issues like this, it's true.
May as well share my personal health problem while we're at it.
I have liver damage. Alcohol related. I'm winding down to teetotal but I am on so many waiting lists it's untrue, so I am doing it all alone - no medication, no counselling, no support. That will all come. But things are a bit hit and miss. The good news is I have already made a difference, the Doctor is pleased with my progress and I have lost nearly two stone.
The bad news is I put my job in danger. I think any regular reader here will know how much that means to me. I can hardly believe it either. No children were ever in any danger (I'd have been dismissed immediately - gross misconduct) but I did end up being sent home after a harrowing session in the Head's office.
The good news is I have an Occupational Health* meeting scheduled. And it looks like that assessment (one of the many I have now completed) might be the one which bears fruit the quickest.
* work based mediation/ health/ counselling service.
Right then, it's all out there now.
We all have our skeletons, Sundae. I'm proud of you for valuing your job as much as you do, and for working as best you can to get your health in order.
It takes a strong person to face things head on and do something about them, Sundae. I think you deserve a LOT of credit. I hope you do get some support from local agencies or clinics soon - that will make things easier over time. But congrats on taking first steps yourself.
Sundae, good for you in making a start on what you have to do even if help is in short supply. You know I'm just at the end of the phone. And beaming supporting thoughts at you front Scotland sell the while. X
Sent by thought transference.
Oh Sundae. We fall down and pick ourselves up, and fall down and pick ourselves up...it seems so difficult at times.
But you know where you want to be, and you're taking steps to get there. You have my respect for that.
Talking, too, about parents: I think about it all the time. My parents are both pretty darn healthy, but as Dana said even best case scenario, some day. And I don't really know how I'll ever get through it. It seems impossible. My dad and I...so much alike. My mom and I...so much alike. My dad lost his best buddy from his whole entire life not long ago, a friend of our family, best man in their wedding, with my parents when they got the call that their first grandchild was born.
I spend as much time with my family as I can. I think not having my own family weighs in too...my identity has always been their daughter, you know?
I don't know, just thinking out loud.
Sundae, keep moving forward, OK?
Thank you people.
When this all went down I felt quite vulnerable and didn't feel I could share it on the Cellar, where I also felt quite vulnerable.
I'm glad I did now, and I've received more kindness than I feel I deserved.
I've always admired that you keep on keeping' on when things get tough, Sundae. Hang in there and good luck to you!
Sundae you seriously deserve to catch a break.
You've had more than your fair share of the shit stick. Just remember
I'm sorry, Dana - somehow I missed your post - so sorry for your loss. It's hard to lose family even when they haven't been the closest to us; they've still been part of the social structure we've always known. And as our parents' generation passes, it does become scary. Sending hugs.
SonofV called me this morning from school, in tears. What?!?! He'd just learned that his favorite teacher of the last two years, the teacher in charge of his IEPs, in charge of the special education department at his school died yesterday of pneumonia. He was in school last week teaching classes.
I feel terrible.
I liked Mr N too. It's a serious blow to a young person, the sudden death of someone close.
My friend told me he thought that he called me first is a great sign... looking to me for clues on how to handle grief. Great... :( He told me that his cousin E was also taking care of him and that he was skipping the next period, but he'd go to his class downtown as scheduled. Good man.
I'm going to prepare for a teachable moment about maturity... be ready for him--for an opportunity for some deep conversations about the meaning of life, and death. He's very sad and so am I.
V, usually schools have access to grief counselors when a staff member passes away. May be worth looking in to if SonOfV has a hard time coping.
Thank you Chocolatl. I'm sure they will have that for all the people in the school. I spoke to his cousin and he said the teachers were all given a letter by the administration to tell everyone what happened, but that the teacher in his class couldn't even get through the letter. Mr N was a big deal at the school, for the kids and the teachers.
I got to spend a part of SonofV's lunch with with him downtown and he's down, but still moving. I take that as a good sign that he's not immobilized with grief. I'll be checking in with him, and my nephew closely over the next few days.
Thanks.
I'm sorry to hear that - what a shock for SonofV and the whole school community. I imagine the grief counselors will be helpful, but your counseling will be the most important. So glad you're there for him. Not all dads are.
Thanks.
Recently I said elsewhere I are srs cat. Actually, I are srs Dad. Pete Zicato (nee dar512) crystallized it for me a long time ago: Parenthood, the hardest work you'll ever love.
That is horrible. How do you go from teaching to dead from pneumonia in a week? IS this not the 21st century?
The 21st century: a dawning era of superbugs and antibiotic resistance. :(
I could see it happening. My classroom is a freaking petri dish. I have kids from across the county, a wide range of socio-economic backgrounds, some over-medicated, some under medicated, some first-time out of house, some in multiple programs, some with older siblings in other schools, one with 15 half-siblings on his Dad's side, thumb suckers, mouthers, diaper wearers, and 2 finger chewers, all brought together in one place. I'd like to give a shout out to the Clorox Bleach people and my TA for her constant scrubbing. We are headed for serious trouble with anti-biotic resistance and schools are part of the puzzle.
So, these two bacteria walk into Griff's school...
I suspect "antibacterial soap" Hand Sanitizers are giving bacteria a leg-up. And Global warming. And Wall Street Bankers.
Kitty Cat aka "Kung Pao Kitty" is sick she is lethargic and breathing hard. I'm going to take her to the Vet at 5:30. Prayers or good thoughts will be appreciated.
Good luck to you and the kitty!
Sending good wishes, hope things turn out well.
Update on Kung Pao? I hope all is well.
Just got off the phone with the Vet. She has been having strokes for the past couple of days. She had been eating and drinking until today, today she just stayed on our bed, and didn't get up but once when she got a drink of water.
The Vet said they was just no saving her. So he put her to sleep so she would no longer suffer. She was only 3 years old, this usually happens to older cats.
Thank You for all your thoughts and prayers.
Bummer, Fargon, she was family.:(
Awww, man. So sorry, fargon. Kung Pao Kitty: cool cat name for a cool cat. :(
Oh fargon, I'm so sorry. Poor kitty, she was such a youngling.
Oh, no. Sorry to hear, fargon.
The hard part comes today. I have to go and pick up the carrier and settle up my bill. Thank You for all of your best wishes we really appreciate all of it.
So sorry to see this Fargon! No matter how old, or young we lose our pets it's a terrible blow.
Sent by thought transference.
I'm so sorry fargon. May she rest in kitty heaven. :flower:
Very sorry to hear of this fargon. Stay strong sir.
Sorry for your loss, Fargon.
you think you know people.
you don't.
Everyone lies.
Everyone lies and then says, "Who? ME? No way!"
Fuck. U. >>>> that's where I went to school.
Since I'm putting all my cards on the table let me be clear: Merc was a bad person. I wouldn't surprise me if he was a Klansman. And when I was so clearly sick and depressed and suicidal he had a little helper try to push me off the cliff: who's that you ask? Why, his best buddie, Aliantha! He and Ali ganged up on me and tried, very hard, to get me to go off the edge. Had I died, they'd would've been all "Oh, we never knew!" and secretly doing a jig in the background.
And yea, monster IS a bully. Sorry, but she is. She "just says what's on her mind" - well, honey, so am I. She especially bullies Sundae whenever she gets the chance. That's why Sundae's not around and coincidentally monster went off the radar at the same time.
Tony-I wonder if you even like me a little bit. You ACT like you do but then you had to go and make a remark that drew me back into a bad time with a very bad man---ha ha funny joke, but at my expense and you surely must know what depression feels like, no????? and to have a health care "pro" (I use that term lightly about merc) suggest I kill myself? really? REALLY? if you don't like someone online, great. Fuck them. But to say THAT to a person clearly on the edge?
Like I said.
oh, a little ps- fuck santa this year.
my sendee WILL get their gift and they are welcome to it and I like the person.
Please don't send me anything. I'm done here. I tried, I really TRIED.
but fuck it.
My fault, Tril. I shouldn't have posted about Merc.
Don't you go off now. That'd suck.
Well, Merc is gone. Monster is pretty much gone too, and I haven't seen much of Ali lately. So why don't you stick around?
oh, a little ps- fuck santa this year.
my sendee WILL get their gift and they are welcome to it and I like the person.
Please don't send me anything. I'm done here. I tried, I really TRIED.
but fuck it.
Don't make me come over there young lady.:eyebrow:
*checks calendar*
Full moon was last week. What the Sam Hill is going on around here?
Tony-I wonder if you even like me a little bit.
Our wonderful history stands on its own m'dear, and I hope that's all I have to say.
'tis the season. :haha:
Post-Thanksgiving, family-induced aggression.
Pre-Christmas, it-ain't-like-the-old-days blues.
Geeze Some bodys Knickers are in a HARD TWIST !!!
fargon, I'm sad with you. we have two cats and it would break my heart to lose either one. So sorry man.
'tis the season. :haha:
Post-Thanksgiving, family-induced aggression.
Pre-Christmas, it-ain't-like-the-old-days blues.
seriously. just wake me up for the super bowl. I don't care about the game, but the commercials are usually cool and I'll be hungry again by then.
Sorry you feel like shit Trilby. :(
in other news,
it's not on par with Trilby's troubles or what's gone for fargon, but I'm sick.
It feels like my holiday cold although there was a report today that the flu season has begun already, earlier than usual. I haven't gotten my flu shot. regardless, I'm pretty miserable, snotty, sore throat, coughing, hot/cold/hot/cold/hot, sore body. Twil gave me a Claritan D last night (the first I've ever had) and the result was almost magical. sinuses cleared up to let me breath and rest. The cough's come on just today and I am dreading it as the last cough was so persistent that my throat hurt and my core was so sore from overexertion that it felt like I'd been beat up in the boxing ring.
waaaa pooooor me.
Poor V. I hope you feel better soon.
I know, right?!
I hear a hot bath calling my name. Back later friends.
Since I'm putting all my cards on the table let me be clear: Merc was a bad person. I wouldn't surprise me if he was a Klansman. And when I was so clearly sick and depressed and suicidal he had a little helper try to push me off the cliff: who's that you ask? Why, his best buddie, Aliantha! He and Ali ganged up on me and tried, very hard, to get me to go off the edge. Had I died, they'd would've been all "Oh, we never knew!" and secretly doing a jig in the background.
And yea, monster IS a bully. Sorry, but she is. She "just says what's on her mind" - well, honey, so am I. She especially bullies Sundae whenever she gets the chance. That's why Sundae's not around and coincidentally monster went off the radar at the same time.
Tony-I wonder if you even like me a little bit. You ACT like you do but then you had to go and make a remark that drew me back into a bad time with a very bad man---ha ha funny joke, but at my expense and you surely must know what depression feels like, no????? and to have a health care "pro" (I use that term lightly about merc) suggest I kill myself? really? REALLY? if you don't like someone online, great. Fuck them. But to say THAT to a person clearly on the edge?
Like I said.
Wow, I'm surprised my name has been brought up here. I'm not a fan of revisiting the past much, but I truly hope that you don't think those things about me now Trilby. I wasn't in such a good place myself when I first came here, so that's my only excuse. I hope that others as well as you can see that I'm a different person these days and the person you first knew here was nothing like who I really am.
If it means a damn to you, I'm sorry from the bottom of my heart to have ever made such a remark. I honestly don't recall it - which obviously makes it worse since whatever was said has had a huge impact on you - but I can't take it back. I can only say that I hope enough time has passed for you to see that you are valued by me.
Please forgive me.
Reading the last couple of pages of this thread has really upset me, and I was feeling pretty sad to begin with. Just got off the phone with my Aunt. My uncle who has been a huge part of my life is doing very poorly. He hasn't got much longer on this earth. I saw him last week for the first time since just before Eva was born (so about 2 months ago) and i was shocked at how rapidly he's gone down hill. I am afraid we'll all lose him before a new year comes in, which is way too soon for any of us, but maybe too long for him to wait.
Sometimes things are shitty. :(
I'm sorry to hear about your uncle, Ali. This thread took a turn that left me speechless and upset as well, when I read it after work today. I hate what's happened this weekend in these two threads. I've been chemo-brained worse than usual in the past few days and couldn't contribute anything very coherent, and still can't ... I just hope the moon hits a new phase or whatever has to happen for things to settle. :(
I'm sorry to hear about your uncle, Ali. I didn't know you then, but I think you're a good person now. :)
You're doing fine Ortho...on all fronts it seems. :) Keep up the good work. xx
That means a lot to me Lola. :) Thank you.
OK, your uncle is a bummer, but I'm not sorry about your finger. :p:
I'm going to poke you in the eye with it when it gets better Bruce!
I order to get close enough to poke me in the eye, you'll be close enough for make-up sex.:blush:
:mg: Not you two!
[post=841286]Can I watch.:blush:[/post]
I'm sorry.
I was having a tiff. a Big one. A tantrum.
I will never leave you because I'm mainlining you all now and the Intervention failed.
Ali- you HAVE changed and you ARE sweet and i DO like you. It was all just PTSD, it really was- and not to denigrate those with war time ptsd, but I have had some doozies happen to me. we all have. it brought up a lot of shite on my part and I'm abashed at my acting out. I thought I was better; actually, I AM better b.c I used to do that stuff quite frequently.
thanks for all the kinds words.
back to you, sexobon.
Now it doesn't have to be a blue Christmas. Yay Trilby!! :)
I'm glad you're feeling better. Well, at least I hope you're feeling better. :)
Everyone is allowed a tantrum now and then!!
And if I thought you were super serious, I would have said a lot more and I would have been hurt. But *I* know that *you* know you are loved here, and by me included.
What's making me angry today is that my ex, before giving me the iMac desktop he didn't want, reformatted it and casually mentioned that I might want to put Mountain Lion on. I did so. Now Adobe Reader won't download anything at all from the internet; I can't print out an IRS form I really need. Oh, and my ex kept all the drivers for both my printers (I couldn't find the discs before I left), and while I know the drivers can be had online, my vision is blurry from chemo and it's causing me physical pain to try to look at the desktop monitor. And he set up the printer so that, even though it's hard-connected to the desktop, it goes wirelessly through the computer instead ... ?? huh? Why wouldn't it recognize the ethernet printer cable? And neither of my two old laptops will find the printer on the network.
I have to go away and calm down and then I'm sure I'll figure out something - get rid of the network printing and just go with direct connection, is my thought. Simple is good. But I'll still have to download the drivers and install them and I don't have the time or the vision, and I still can't use Adobe Reader despite downloading the latest version, and .... :rant: :mad:
Bleh. Rant over. I guess I'm most upset about my blurry vision. If I could see, I could read my stuff for exams and write my papers and download those drivers and all of this wouldn't matter. :thepain:
[SIZE="7"]sorry to hear about your vision and computer troubles orthodoc[/SIZE]
[SIZE="7"]Thanks V ... Hey, this is better! All is well! [/SIZE] oh wait ...
What's making me angry today is my iMac
This is why god invented PCs
My little Corgi, Wyn, got attacked in the dog park today by a vicious shepard mix almost 3 times Wyn's size. :mad::(
Everyone is allowed a tantrum now and then!!
And if I thought you were super serious, I would have said a lot more and I would have been hurt. But *I* know that *you* know you are loved here, and by me included.
that's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me this morning!
;)
He only loves you for your mind, unlike me.
Shit, is Wyn ok?
Thanks for your concern, Dana! I checked him out from nose to tail twice and found no sign of physical harm. But he was very subdued last night and didn’t have that little Corgi sparkle in his eyes. He seems perkier today, though.
I am so angry over this incident. Wyn is a tough little guy. He is fearless about swimming across cold mountain streams and will hike through the desert and the mountains with me on his short little legs and never seems to tire and has never wimped out and asked to be picked up. He may be small, but his heart is huge. Up till yesterday, he played with the big dogs as well as the small, always happy to make new friends and not adverse to a bit of doggie rough housing.
But he can’t take on another dog in such an uneven fight. He's NEVER been a fighter, anyhow - or a snapper or a nipper. He doesn’t deserve to lose the spark in his eye for so much as a minute – never mind being beat up by the local dog park bully. Right now, I am very, very angry.
Oh poor lad. He'll be ok. They're resilient creatures. Would probably have more lasting impact if he'd been hurt rather than just frightened and if he'd been that bit younger.
Carrot was targeted by a staffie cross when he was about 5 months old. Didn't hurt him but was ragging on his fur and pinning him down to the floor. Thankfully he was so young that he didn't try and fight back, he just froze. I'm convinced if he'd have put up the least resistance she'd have torn him to shreds.
I was worried afterwards that he'd be timid with other dogs, but he was just as gungho about greeting them as he ever was, so no harm done.
I've seen dogs roughhouse where I'd swear it was a death match. But after establishing pack dominance, the pecking order, nothing worse than a lot of slobbered fur.
Oh me too. But this was more than just roughhousing. The staffie cross that went for carrot came hurtling at him from across the road and was ragging on his fur in a very particular way. It wasn't just about establishing dominance, it was about provoking a response. Bear in mind this wasn't a dog attacking another dog, this was a bitch attacking a pup. That's a troubled dog right there.
Pilau was a troubled dog. In some ways. And he would do the same thing given an opportunity, which is why he spent a lot of his life on extender leads rather than free running. In that situation, the other dog's resopnse is key to where it all goes. Fight back, or even worse try to run away and it kicks the whole thing into overdrive.
It's a different dynamic to the normal roughousing for dominance, which I also saw Pil do with some male dogs including his brother.
It wasn't just about establishing dominance, it was about provoking a response. Bear in mind this wasn't a dog attacking another dog, this was a bitch attacking a pup. That's a troubled dog right there.
Yep.
That was the same exact situation - a large, adult bitch attacking a smaller pup that still isn't even a year old.
I talked around with some dog park regulars and found out that "Bella" has attacked other dogs there not just once, but several times. In two instances, Bella inflicted damage that incurred vet bills for several hundred dollars.
Bella's owner has been reported to the local animal control officer more than once, also. So far, the owner has been warned, but with no citation or other consequences. Unbelievable!
Tonight I was at the dog park along with a casual aquaintance of mine and his dog, Carson (a lively beagle that Wyn always plays with). Carson's Dad saw Bella and her owner pulling into the paring lot and said, "Here comes trouble." Then he called Carson, walked over to his truck and left.
I never confront people IRL. I'd rather just get along or avoid any potential situations, myself. But I was pretty P.O.'ed after what had happened to Wyn and finding out that Bella actually tears into other dogs all the time.
Why should all the responsible owners and their dogs be forced out of the park by one irresponsible person and her mean dog? Plus, the day might well come when Bella actually kills a smaller dog if someone doesn't get there quickly enough to rescue it.
So, I let the woman who owns Bella have it. I told her she was not to bring Bella into the park if Wyn was there, too, otherwise I'd call animal control on her and THIS time I'd demand that they do something more than just give her a little slap on the wrist.
Of course Bella's owner denied that her dog had a problem. It was EVERYONE else who had a problem, not poor, sweet Bella. :right: I told her that she'd better worry about ME and the major problem animal control would visit on her if she ever let Bella near Wyn again.
Then I left, too. So, one more time Bella had the park all to herself while Wyn and I finished our stroll by walking around in the cemetary across the street. I hate this kind of shit.
Stupid woman. She's doing her dog no favours.
It's hearbreaking to have a dog that can't be trusted with other dogs and/or people. Took me a while to admit to myself that Pilau wasn't getting better about it and actually was posing a risk to himself and others. Pilau scared a few younger dogs before I got the message and stopped letting run free when others were about. I got an extender lead. Eventually, in order to let him run free without causing trouble I took to muzzling him whenever he was off the lead. Unless we were in a place where I could see very clearly that nobody was around.
Pilau wasn't a vicious dog. He was a frightened dog. He got the message early on (from a variety of causes) that outdoors was a dangerous place. And nothing I did changed that. I'm quietly confident that he would never have done any serious damage. But if he'd nipped a child, what then? And however confident I am that he would never have savaged a human I could never have said the same about other dogs. I doubt he'd have ever done more than minor damage with a dog, but I couldn't be sure about that. He had the potential to do more and his unpredictable nature outdoors meant it was a possibility I had to take seriously.
Setting aside the impact on other dogs and dogwalkers, the impact of an incident on Pilau himself could have been catastrophic. He once tried to pick a fight with a Japanese Akita. And what if he had actually bitten someone? A child? Even a little herding nip is a major matter for a child. Or seriously lost it with a smaller dog? What about when the police turn up to see if your dog is dangerous and he tries to bite the policeman because he's scared?
That dog's owner is allowing her dog to endanger itself. She is putting her at risk of starting a fight she can't finish or euthanasia atthe hands of the authorities.
I'm sorry Wyn was roughed up but....walking around the cemetery sounds like more fun than the dog park any day! You never know who you'll meet. :ghost:
Plus...no shortage of entertaining bones to chew...
I am such a goddamn FOOOL that I should be shot immediately (after given sufficient morphine).
Remember Professor Tiny Bits? well-got over him. Years ago. Feeling good, livin' life, making a life for myself, gave up his drama and yes-but-no-but-maybe.
Well, a few weeks ago HE emailed me OUT OF THE BLUE to say thank you for winning the White House for Obama (he's one of those rich liberals who, if he HAD to walk amongst the hoi polloi, would die of the stench, dahling) anyway- he said, "Let's be friends," and I STUPIDLY SAID OKAY. Knowing he was seeing/or saw a woman in England only 15 years his junior instead of my 21 years. And all I know of her is that she is a prof. at UEL and "will do anything" - use your dirty imaginations.
well, I wrote him a very vanilla email a few days ago (about a month after he'd first contacted me) about my 'rents, kids and how are his grandkids-one of which I've never seen. Asked him to send me a pic of her. thanks! have a good day!
TODAY i get an email telling me he'd like to go into more but it's hellish you see as his marriage has reached 'a crisis point' ----more later.
dumbdumbdumbdumbdumb I am so DMB! I am SO FUCKING DUMB. It's amazing I've managed to stay alive this long-most of my tribe threw themselves from stormy cliffs into the sea at age 14. geeeeeeeeeSUS.
He ONLY contacted me so he could triangulate this thing into some sort of -what, help me here Zen, what? a square? a four-sided relationship? Or am I "x" to their triangle? What the FUCK does he need a 'friend' for when he's got plenty except to taunt me with this 'crisis' bullshit which I am SURE involves some woman who is prettier, brighter, more accomplished, manicured, Chanel-ed and perfect in every way including her perfect, perfect cunt.
GODDDDDDDDDDDAMN.
Good thing I see my therapist tomorrow. I feel like drinking a gallon of rum at this asshole.
I should email him this:
You, sir, are an asshole. I hope she gets it all. As a matter of fact, I shall contact your wife and let her know I will be able to testify on her behalf if it comes to that. I kept all our correspondences and all your gifts throughout the years we were together. I shall also inform her of your pornography problem. The one where your favorite porn star looks disturbingly like your daughter.
Love, Trilby
Tril, please don't call yourself dumb because that will make me a dummy too. What you did was normal. He was just being an ass, and you were just being nice. Now that you see his scheme, ignore him again. Frankly, what you did is something I'd do too. I would like to see that as being a nice person. Now is the time to stop being nice to him since his friendship wasn't sincere. Please don't drink as a punishment. It should only be done in festivities. :D ( but for you, really, please don't. :p )
Trilby, you don't sound dumb to me. You sound like someone who knows EXACTLY what is going on. You're sharp.
Tril, don't beat yourself up. You've caught his triangulation early and can blow him off now. Yeah, it's so easy to be nice to these assholes who only get in touch because a) they're having a slow weekend; b) they need just a little more drama with which to berate their current SO; c) they want to test how much control they still have of your non-relationship and how easy it is to pull you back in.
They send out something nice, you respond in kind, and then the lash comes out of nowhere. Nice game.
It doesn't say anything about you, who are a good-hearted, generous person. It says everything about HIM. Don't buy into the rest of the game, which is aimed at making you squirm and feel bad and upset. If you just block him and don't respond, he may try pretty hard to get back in touch one more time just to prove to himself that he can reel you in whenever he wants. You can have the satisfaction of letting him fail on that one. Although I know how tempting it is to respond. (I admit, I rather like your theoretical email.)
Just ... block him. He's not worth a single moment of your precious time. He's also not worth a single oz of rum. You're waayyy above his narcissistic games.
Flowers to you. :flower: :flower: :flower:
Tril: Do Not call yourself dumb to this man. Don't hand to him on a plate solid evidence of his ability to make you feel inferior.
Step away from this one. That email tells him he is your weakness.
No post from Limey today.
Silly bloody postal service.
Tril don't be a plum.
You got over this man once. Second time is easier. I know. I attracted serial bastards.
He's a hit & run merchant. He's hit, now you run for the bloody hills.
all sage and good advice. I thank ye.
It IS easier the second time.
Uck-fay Im-hay. No more correspondences. He's only playing a game coz he's nearing (gasp) 69!!!!!!
But I was a maroon for thinking he was sincere.
eta: I emailed 'are you leaving her for that woman in England?" and he emailed back "in limbo right now but moving in that direction" -and that was all.
DONE. My heart has been broken more times than I thought could be humanly possible.
Now I'm off to look for my TRUE soulmate- Gollum.
You must really want a ring.
Good thing I see my therapist tomorrow. I feel like drinking a gallon of rum at this asshole.
As they say, drinking "at" someone is like drinking a vial of poison at your enemy and expecting THEM to fall over dead. But you know that already. In the face of such problems, I like smashing dishes. ;)
Hang tough, girl.
I should also say that I thought the phrase "I feel like drinking a gallon of rum at this asshole." was extremely evocative and self-aware.
I'm certain you won't especially given how you expressed it. But I definitely get the feeling you convey when you say it like that. whoa.
Tril, as others said, you caught it early and now is the time to change the station.
From now on repeat this mantra:
"What the fuck does this asshole want?" Then just hit delete or hang up or keep walking.
As a friend says, don't rent space to him in your mind.
As they say, drinking "at" someone is like drinking a vial of poison at your enemy and expecting THEM to fall over dead. But you know that already. In the face of such problems, I like smashing dishes. ;)
Hang tough, girl.
Well crap. Shouldn't have bought all that Corelle.
An old cow orker gave me all her stoneware because she wanted Corelle for its lightness and break resistance. It's beautiful, with big sunflowers and dark greens, almost Van Gogh-ish. It does have chips and lines of breakage but I think it has character. It's ripply dipply pipply, and a smarsh at the games of frickle-frack and mushgoons.
I love stoneware like that.
I almost wrote "stonewear." That would be interesting. Kinda uncomfortable, but durable.
Well crap. Shouldn't have bought all that Corelle.
Snort
I almost wrote "stonewear." That would be interesting. Kinda uncomfortable, but durable.
Top lines include:
Liz Clayborne
Kenneth Coal
Halstone
Tommy Hilldigger
interesting factoid I hadn't thought of: HIS WIFE FOUND OUT ABOUT MISS ENGLAND and said, "Let's face it, bub; you're a serial adulterer. I know about Ms. England-known about her for years. I"m sick of you and your narcissistic ego needs that take the form of needing the attention of every woman on the planet [Bill Clinton, take note] so, here is where we part. Get OUT."
my sister thought of that.
Good to have sisters if they are nice, which this one is. Bet she found out. B/C why, at 69, would you blow up your sweet little life with the two adorable grandkids and a hottie stashed away in England and the PRETENSE of a perfect Wellesley family/home/marriage?
I can only hope that this ends some way in which it becomes an episode on the True Crime channel. My favorite channel.
Hints: after your wife "leaves on a solo vacation" or "storms off after a tiff" do NOT immediately get the carpet cleaned or removed. Same with mattress.
Do NOT try ethylene glycol---the medical community is getting hip to this type of poisoning.
Do NOT say she "ran off with some other man" esp. when there are kids/grandkids in the picture. She'd never leave them for some man and we all know it.
Do NOT google 'fool proof ways to kill someone'
Do NOT think all your weird porn will be scrubbed. The FBI can find anything on even the most wrecked computers.
IF you are the CEO of a company, do NOT be seen taking the garbage out to the company dumpster----CEO's just don't do that sort of thing.
rubbing hands together in that German word that means I'm glad you're getting fucked over , mate.
game coz he's nearing (gasp) 69!!!!!! Be very carefully about using the 69! Ya hear!!
Anyway my !@#$$% kitchen sink is leaking, has been for awhile, from looks. So tomorrow I'lll head to hardware to pick up all the things I MIGHT need . When I get down to check this crap I might need to call 911 to pick my sorry donkey off the floor. Good times just keep rolling on.
It's healthy to keep busy, and keep moving, you should thank the sink.:lol:
Epic hair loss.
It's coming out almost in clumps every time I shower. It's totally normal -- a result of hormonal readjustment after pregnancy -- but it's still upsetting to see, and to feel my ponytail getting thinner and thinner.
Sorry choc, that' upsetting. :(
The good thing is, it'll all grow back in. But having the growth/loss phases line up for so much hair at one time is disconcerting. Hope it comes back promptly!
The miasma that I am currently battling.
I lost lots of hair after I had Max, but it all came back. It's the only pregnancy it's happened after for me, and I ended up being low in serotonin, hence the PND. Get your hormones checked just in case Choco. I'm sure it was just coincidence for me, but better to be safe than sorry.
So Merlin wasn't in the house when I got home yesterday evening. Nobody remembered when he left as the door can be a turnstile. He didn't show up today, we asked a couple neighbors, nothing seen of him. The woods are full of gut piles, douchey hunters, and coyotes. Imma getting nervous about the old boys situation.:(
Hope Merlin turns up soon! :(
Thanks ortho and Ali. I still have a very decent full head of hair, it's just strange after having it be so thick for the past few months! I'm already on an SSRI, so I doubt it's serotonin, but I'll keep that in mind.
Oh no, Griff ... hope Merlin turns up as well.
Give him a big hug and a thorough scolding when he comes home. :(
Do I know that feeling Griff, so sorry that is the suck~ :(
Spiderman got away for two days once----and I'd had her since kittenhood AND (bad owner, bad owner!) she hadn't been fixed yet. I live in a high traffic are AND by a creek full of aggressive racoons, opposums and fox. she was gone two days (had never been outside before) but came home and
VOILA! Was NOT preggers, either!
Merlin will be back. I feel certain he will.
Oh no. I hope Merlin comes home soon. :(
have you tried wandering around the woods, bleating?
Benny and I did a couple hours in the dark last night. It isn't looking good.
Do you think Benny would willingly get in somebody's car?
shit. is he chipped? tagged?
I hate this place. Not the Cellar. THIS place.
Having a completely insane moodswing. I should probably take my meds and go to bed before I do anything worse than yelling at people on the phone.
SMRT.
check back in later though.
Do you think [strike]Benny[/strike] Merlin would willingly get in somebody's car?
Yeah, he is/was a complete sweetheart except when someone was on his porch.
shit. is he chipped? tagged?
Tags no chip.
fucking fuck.
I'm upset at myself. I parked carelessly the other day, got a parking ticket. $44 bucks. OUCH. But it gets better. Since I didn't pay it promptly (within 14 days) a late penalty of $25 bucks has been added.
So.
Somebody's gonna get $69 less holiday this year.
goddammit.
That sucks V :( Bad enough having to pay out, but when it's your own fault it sucks ass big time.
@ Griff: still no news?
Nothing. The neighbors expressed sincere concern for him which was nice, but nothing new.
I'm sorry, Griff. Still crossing fingers and hoping for good news.
Good news/ bad news.
Wokplace Assessment Review has me signed off until January, then a phased return. Have to assent to abstinence (I do!)
Hate to be away for Christmas week, but I still have a job.
Also have to go onto SSP (which is even lower than my normal wages). But I still have a job.
And I've lost 2.5 stone.
If I can make it 3 by the time I get back to work then they'll see the difference.
Sorry Griff, haven't commented on your situation, been too concerned with mine.
I really feel for you. Bloody awful - fingers crossed and all that.
V, it will come back to you one way or another. Which is hippy-speak for "I feel your pain too". Not a good time of year for frivolities.
Sundae, you've lost 2.5 stone - they'll see that all right! Well done, even if it was kind of forced on you! The not back to work til January thing sucks, indeed, but then you're going back to the job you love.
Big V - been there, done that (not with parking fines, but same sort of thing), bummmmer.
Griff - I do hope Merlin turns up safe and well.
Merlin, come home, please!
I've mentioned before that Twil's dog is
part antelope, part Houdini, part fence climbing monkey, purebred recidivist.
Last night she called me and said "Jack's back." *blinkblink* Back? Yeah, he'd slipped his bonds and had some adventure through the area. He was all muddy and wet when she found him and brought him in. I know well the ache of a missing family member. I hope he turns up at the pound or the neighbor's or back in the yard! And soon. Merlin, come home!
well, that's GREAT actually, Sundae! Time OFF!
Now, how are they going to (if they are) monitor you? How will they know if you've been naughty or nice? what is a phased return?
and congrats on the wt. loss babeh!
Griff---I'm so sorry. :( I hope Merlin comes home.
and sundae---what is SSP?
I"m an ignorant Yank you know.
---what is SSP?
I"m an ignorant Yank you know.
SSP is Statutory Sick Pay, a government allowance payable when your employer's sick pay stops. Dang commie idea if you ask me!
Sent by thought transference.
2.5 stone?! that's 35 pounds? Wow! wtg!
2.5 stone?! that's 35 pounds? Wow! wtg!
I know! I stopped drinking and all I got was consciousness (which is overrated IMHO)
*snort*
eta--a reaction, not a suggestion
2.5 stone? And you didn't have to go in the jungle to do it!
Well done chika :)
2.5 stone?! that's 35 pounds? Wow! wtg!
Please excuse me for having certain thoughts, but I bet your butt looks great in those jeans.:o
Two weeks ago, this part of Oregon had a major rain.
Rivers were "blown out"... flooding and chocolate colored.
My wife and I spent a great weekend at the coast,
and came back to PDX on Sunday.
It was a fantastic drive home, up over to coast range,
first along the Wilson River to the summit,
and then down Gales Creek to the Willamette Valley.
I was so cheerful and looking forward to getting back on-line again.
I planned to describe the brilliant green of the river and white hanging fogs,
the yellows of the vine maples on the forest floor,
the greys of the forest punctuated by the greens of the cedar and fir.
But first, I started catching up on my un-read postings,
and got into those god-awful postings in the "Merc - Wtf" thread.
I've been fairly dispirited all week.
So now it's another weekend.
I am going to use it to get over those disappointments,
and spend more time with my G-daughter, my wife, my dog,
or anyone else that can put up with me and my foul mood.
Cheer up Lamp. It's not all bad. :)
Please excuse me for having certain thoughts, but I bet your butt looks great in those jeans.:o
Actually my jeans are hanging off me so it looks like my butt is halfway to my knees.
A look prized by teenage boys, but not so desirable when you're fair, fat and forty.
It looks quite tidy in my size 20 trousers though ;) (US size 18)
Lamp, stay out of certain threads, put some Dwellars on Ignore if you have to.
There is good news out there.
A trip to the urgent care clinic this morning revealed an extensive kidney infection. My back is killing me, and I keep puking up anything I eat. Yet despite being exhausted, I can't sleep. All I can do is lay here and hope the antibiotics start working soon. Blech.
:( Sorry to hear that, Clod. Try to stay hydrated and feel better soon!
Get well soon. Keep up the fluids.
Sent by thought transference.
Not an expert in kidneys, but mightn't they want a little time off, or are they like livers and need to be punished?
Yikes. I'm sorry about ur kidneys, Clod! Get well soon!
Oh Clod, that sucks. Get well soon m'dear.
aww, man, that sucks, Clod. Hope you feel better soon!
Not an expert in kidneys, but mightn't they want a little time off, or are they like livers and need to be punished?
More water helps flush the infection out. More chocolate almond milk, on the other hand, probably not the best idea. But my stomach's got their back in that regard, couldn't keep it down if I wanted to. I am feeling a little better now though, might even manage to eat breakfast tomorrow.
Didn't you have a kidney infection not so long ago clod? I hope this one sorts itself out soon. xx
Argh, Clod. I've only had cystitis. It was bad enough once to become a kidney infection and it hurt like buggery.
Many healing thoughts to you.
drink
drink
drink
drink
take all your antibiotitcs
take your pain medication
take care of yourself.
Have Mr Clod take care of you for us, hm?
Yes, I know this makes me a selfish bastard, guilty.
I asked way back when, that Dad would take me to Amersham on Friday 21st.
It was fine, agreed, done and dusted.
Checked again today - because I am aware things have changed.
NO.
Your father cannot drive at night any more.
Well, all fair and good but he drives to church every Saturday night.
And (why this irritates me) no-one has said anything about this new rule to me. My travels plans depend on it.
I get it. I do.
I just wish Mum had discussed this with me.
She knows what a tight budget I am on. She knows I can't rely on my salary this month. Good job I asked. I can't even offer to go during the day, as I have a counselling session from 15.00-16.00. Dark by then.
I'll deal with this of course.
And they both have so much on their plates I know why my travel plans weren't considered.
I'm being a spoilt brat.
But better to get it out here than be bratty to them.
It's just a £17 reduction in funds for the hoolie.
Put that against Dad's health it's nothing.
Hope you were able to work something out, Sundae.
Our pediatrician's office is closed through the end of the year. Wanting to rule out infection as the source of Beans' five day fussiness, I decided to take her to the after hours pediatrics place. (Verdict: just teething.)
After a 45 minute wait, the doctor came in and started manhandling Beans. She (understandably) freaked out. Rather than slow down and coo to comfort her, he just yelled "HEY!" in her face and kept going. He kept checking her over roughly, and she got so upset she was choking on her own cries. So the doc yelled in her ear "DON'T GET PISSED!"
What an ass! Who yells at a four month old baby who was in pain to begin with? The mama bear in me wanted to tear him to shreds. Needless to say, we're never going there again.
What the fuck?
I'd file a complaint. He must work for someone, the franchise owner for the clinic. Really, really unacceptable. This guy doesn't know what he's doing, and who knows what harm his ignorance could cause. Not that I'm wishing you ill, but what makes you think an idiot like that got even that right?
Unacceptable.
Seriously, file a complaint. There's no excuse ... I can't even conceive of yelling at a baby I was examining. He needs to be fired. Think about filing a complaint with the state medical board. He can be called on the carpet for unprofessional behavior, endangering a patient's welfare, etc. Frankly, I think he needs a psychological evaluation. Please do make a complaint, choco, I hate to think there's a doc out there behaving like that.
Thankfully it was only at "asshole" level and did not escalate to "psycho." He was using the tone and volume you'd use for an adult who was hard of hearing, instead of the comforting murmur you'd expect for a teething baby. It was just a complete lack of bedside compassion, in contrast to our regular pediatrician who is so sweet and gentle.
***SPOILER ALERT***
Big rant follows.
[COLOR="LemonChiffon"]You're the mom, so, ok. Don't expect a babysitting request from me though. I think it's total bullshit. Being an asshole to a baby. Hm. Why? I know you talk to Bean, you're immersing her in language, teaching her. The good doctor was also speaking to her, but not to teach, he was only scratching his *own* itch, venting his own frustrations.
It's been a really long time since I was a baby, but I know some stuffs about them. They get your speech to them, on a visceral level. And you can move that needle in either direction, more comfort, more stress, whatever. But they're not verbal. They can't be admonished. Why did he speak to her like that? What was the purpose? I bet he wanted her to be more cooperative, that's understandable, desirable. So, I ask myself again, why speak to her like that? Was it out of utter ignorance that a crying four-month-old baby wouldn't be able to understand his words? Was it indifference? Callousness? Did he really think he could shock her into silence? Speaking to her like she's a hard of hearing adult is stupid, at best. I'm running down the list here, and *none* of them fit. Asshole fits. Other, worse descriptions fit.
You and I talk with words. We can use them (and other modes) to communicate with each other. Bean doesn't have words yet. She was communicating with the doctor, and you, and it's up to the adults in the room to accommodate her. There's nothing, not one single thing that a four-month-old baby is obligated to do, not even settle down, not stop crying, nothing. The universe revolves around them. As it should.
Naturally, as parents, we know there's other stuff going on, but we let them have their "illusion". We have the bandwidth to do so and still have enough left over to take care of business in the rest of our lives. Sounds like your doctor doesn't. Maybe it was an anomaly, or maybe there's a bigger problem, I don't know. But in my opinion, it should not be left to stand unchallenged. I'm not the kind of man that sends his meal back to the kitchen because it's messed up, I'm an easy-going guy. But this subject is serious and though Bean's almost certainly undamaged by the episode, it should have never have happened and it for damn sure should never happen again. Letting it slide is a bad idea. I wouldn't be interested in an apology or a refund or anything. I just want assurance that it is on the record and that it won't happen again.
ps, I'm sorry about the babysitting remark, that was unfair. YOU'RE fine, I'm frustrated by what the doctor did, not what you did.
[/COLOR]
***
tl;dr:
I'm sorry that the doctor was an asshole and that he treated Bean badly. I completely understand your anger at his actions and your frustration with the situation. I applaud your restraint. I sure hope Bean doesn't suffer too badly; new teeth are terrible. Poor little Bean.
Still, kick that doctor in the balls for me. We have a similar doc up here and no one is willing to report his fuck-ups, NOT EVEN AFTER HE KILLED A PATIENT by prescribing the wrong meds.
He tried to put our pregnant friend on Lipitor because her cholesterol was mildly elevated.
Luckily, she knew not to take it and asked him if he was serious and if he knew what he was doing. She didn't file a complaint.
Yabbut... I never said I wasn't filing a complaint. Just clarifying what happened. It was still majorly uncalled for and I'll make sure it's logged.
Yabbut... I never said I wasn't filing a complaint. Just clarifying what happened. It was still majorly uncalled for and I'll make sure it's logged.
Good.
I don't know how the word "pissed" is viewed over there, but here it's definitely swearing.
A doctor who swears at any patient, let alone a baby, is a cunt.
Glad not lasting harm was done, Choc.
And glad there was no infection.
Doctors can be dickheads just like any other person. When I was pregnant with Eva, the local doc put me on a medication for hypertension which in some cases can cause depression. This was for me, who had suffered from PND and had been on Zoloft - which was prescribed by the same clinic - and the problem wasn't picked up till the hospital realised and were horrified. Unfortunately, by the time it was picked up, I was already having great trouble with my emotional state so it took a while to get back to normal.
Rest assured, I've had words with the head doctor at the clinic about it, but in the end, they're not doing anything about it. That's fine. I now know to be very sure to do my own research on anything they ever prescribe again. Fortunately, as a family we don't do the whole prescription thing much at all, so it's mostly just me.
I'm glad Beans is ok. Teething can be a yuck time for everyone. I hope Eva has an easy time of it like the rest of mine did. :) I'll let you know how it's going in a couple of months. ;)
They'll try to give nursing moms meds that are not safe for breastmilk, too. Happened to me all the time.
My sore belly just got more and more sore over the past few days, until I was crying out every time I moved. So off to the Doctors today - only appointment I could get clashed with one my Dad had (different practice) so I had to get a taxi there.
Turns out it's actually a urinary infection, which has caused painful constipation. I was right not to use laxatives, but he prescribed me something "to keep things moving" and agreed I could take some painkillers ot get through the first few days. I also got antibiotics for the infection.
Still in pain, but not quite as sharp after necking some pills.
The real pain though, is that the Doctor prescribed me an over the counter item for my colon. Thanks Doc. That wasted approx £4 which on top of the taxi and other prescription charges made it an expensive day out. The pharmacist said nothing either. Witch.
Anyway, I got the bus home (it only runs in this direction) which was only £1.
So that at least was a consolation.
*hugs* Oh honey, that totally sucks. At least your getting treatment now. Those antibiotics should get to work fast.
Feel better soon chika.
Ouch, Sundae. But hopefully things'll start to improve from here on in! X
Sent by thought transference
Yeouch -- hope the pills kick in and kick out that infection! Cranberry juice is supposed to help with urinary infections, too.
That's one of the most miserable things ... feel better soon, Sundae!
Some imbecile is setting off fireworks in my neighborhood. This wouldn't be a problem but for the fact that one of my dogs, Pepper, suffers from acute sound-induced anxiety. He has prescription meds that we give him for the Fourth of July and New Year's Eve. I hate seeing him suffer and being helpless to comfort him. :(
Crappy couple of days. First, the pipe snaps on the water filter unit as I'm trying to change the once-a-year filter (as opposed to the every-three-months filter on the left.) About three gallons of water spray onto me and the garage floor, and I have to make an emergency trip to Home Depot for parts before the water can be turned back on. But wait, what's this? The water is still on in the house, somehow. We realize, now, that for the last year the filtration system has only been filtering the hot water, not the cold. So we've called the guy who installed it, to get it hooked into the correct damn pipe...
And then today, I back into a stupid pole in a parking lot, in the new car that I hadn't even called to get put on our insurance yet. It looks like they're going to cover it anyway, but it's the first car accident that's been my fault since I was in high school. I feel like an idiot.
Also, on Thursday I got the kids up and dressed and packed lunches and drove them to school... except it turns out I looked at the wrong calender, and school doesn't start again until Monday. I swear I'm losing my mind.
I swear I'm losing my mind.
You have young kids. This is a well known side-effect. It wears off as your kids get older.
In the mean time, try to remember where you left it last.
2013 has not been good for me so far...
Lost my job Jan 2. Long story, but fired for something I didn't do.
Jan 3 my dogs eat a mouse poison block, got them to throw up within 15 min of eating it.. vet figures we are ok, but wont know for sure until Jan 10-13.
Today, Jan 7th my Loki dog needed out super fast, so I let him out without leash. Whats the little shit do, runs up the road. Out I go leash in hand, tromping out into the 2 feet of fresh snow we just got. I was standing in the middle of the road, leash in hand, with my hand up in a stop gesture. A car keeps going, and hits my dog, tossing him like a rag doll, and keeps driving. I scrambled to get to my dog, slipping on the road, the car almost hits me. AND STILL DOES NOT STOP! I got an older man, grey hair, black jacket, and a passanger, in a smaller black car. No plate # because of the snow.
Now, my dog seems ok, fine in fact. He might have some muscle pain and bruising tomorrow, but that might be it. ( here's another stresser... the mouse poison will cause bleeding, hemoraging is how it kills. Loki did not injest enough to kill him, but now I am worried that the bump with the car will be more dangerous) The vet said with no whimpering, no limping and no actual cuts/bruises, He is a very lucky dog. Thinks the snow made him not have any grip to stop the hit, he bounced off the car similar to how he bounces off his "sister" and landed in the soft snow. He got up right away. The vet figures we got very lucky, and even thinks the poison was not in his system long enough to even affect him. But that does not make me feel any better.
I made a mistake, I let him out, knowing full well he likes to run up the road and play in the snow. I watched him get hit. And now... I am in so much pain I can hardly breath. I can't look for a job in this much pain, I can file a police report, but they have very little to go on, and I am not sure I would be able to file medical EI or an ICBC claim without a driver. For that matter, I was not actually hit, just slipped and twisted my hip/back.
The first week of this new year has not been a very good start. I am sure we will bounce back, but right now I am going to go curl up on the couch with my dorky Loki dog, and cry myself to sleep. After a nap, hopefully I will have some idea what to do or what direction to take.
Crikey, Jaydaan, I hope you and Loki are OK.
Sent by thought transference.
what a nightmare. get well soon.
Hoping things improve from here on out, Jaydaan. :(
How awful, Jaydaan. I hope your aches get better with some sleep and that you and Loki-dog come out of this ok.
Damn... and I thought my year sucked so far.
Thanks for the perspective.
(((hugs)))
Well you can be thankful you got all your bad shit for the year over with in the first week. Smoooth sailing for another 51 weeks. :yesnod:
That's awful, Jaydaan. I hope you and Loki have a speedy recovery and the jerk driving that car eats 50 blocks of mouse poison.
sent via Pony Express
I'm so sorry, Jaydaan. For what it's worth, I'd call the police anyway. Could be there have been multiple reports, or they already know the old coot with the little black car and they're just trying to find a witness who can get his license revoked.
Feel better soon.
Fatigue this cycle has knocked me down badly and never resolved, as it has during previous cycles. My daughter had to drive me back to my place today and I still didn't have enough energy to unpack. And today, out of the blue, I developed episcleritis. The last time I had it, it turned into scleritis and almost perf'd my globe. :worried: They may delay Thursday's chemo ... I'll find out tomorrow.
Back to work tomorrow. So much to do, and I can't even unpack my suitcase.
Oh crap, ortho. I feel for you. I just looked it up. I have Cogan's dystrophy so I can relate. Sometimes you just want to rip your eyeballs out.
Yikes.
Not that I... Doubt you, but do you think you will have to cross your heart, "hope to die", and the *shiver* rest of that stuff?! Cause, ew. And ouch.
I know it must be awful if I have to google your condition to know what it is! :eek: I know you will find the strength to keep on keeping on. You are worth it! :)
Still not seeing the left properly?
Congratulations, you're now ready for US politics!
Seriously, I are srry about ur fovea.
lol Zen. You'll be accused of anti-american sentiment if you're not careful. lol
That was a good one though. hehe
monster, although I'm loling at Zen, I do feel compassionate about your situation. I just am not very good at finding the right words for what I want to say. It's needless for me to say that I hope things do improve. Honestly I do.
Carrot's hydro didn't go so well today. Poor lamb's all stiffened up and seems to have strained some of the muscles in his groin (similar to humans who have bad hips getting pain in the groin area) his gait is very uneven, almost double the stride length on his left side compared to his right. Usually after a few minutes on the treadmill he finds his rhythm and settles into it. This time we had to stop after 7 minutes.
I knew he wasn;t right. The last week and a half he's been intermittently exhibiting pain based behaviours (nipping and getting hyper) but difficult to isolate where it was coming from (back muscles? hipjoints?).
So we've to go his regular vets and discuss a possible short course of anti-inflammatories. The idea of which gives me a sinking feeling...seriously, already? He's only just turned one year old. Don't much like the idea of him being in pain though either, so hey ho. Needs must and all that.
Fatigue this cycle has knocked me down badly and never resolved, as it has during previous cycles. My daughter had to drive me back to my place today and I still didn't have enough energy to unpack. And today, out of the blue, I developed episcleritis. The last time I had it, it turned into scleritis and almost perf'd my globe. :worried: They may delay Thursday's chemo ... I'll find out tomorrow.
Back to work tomorrow. So much to do, and I can't even unpack my suitcase.
I'm betting you need a perf'd globe like a hole in the eye.
Feel better. Do fake tears help, or something that shrinks the vessels?
my vision.
[RIGHT]Dear monster
get well soon. I am sorry about your cerebral vascular system.[/RIGHT]
I'm betting you need a perf'd globe like a hole in the eye.
Feel better. Do fake tears help, or something that shrinks the vessels?
Thanks, foot, V, Pete, and Nirvana. Intraocular and systemic steroids help. I'm on both of those now thanks to my onc, and because I'm getting three days' worth of steroids around my chemo. I have a referral to Ophthalmology but no appointment yet. The steroids have calmed things down but I'll be off them Sat morning (and my immune-boosting shot will kick in after a couple days) so we'll see what happens then. The really nasty thing about eyes is that when they're affected by autoimmune disorders, a bad outcome in one can cause a 'sympathetic' reaction in the other and you lose both. If things deteriorate badly on the weekend I'll just have to go to the ER.
The sympathetic eye thing does not, repeat NOT, happen with field cuts due to stroke. Not trying to add to your stress, Monster. I'm very sorry your vision is still a problem.
that is sweet to post on the right. sadly it doesn't quite work like that -I don't see the left of whatever I'm looking at. Unless I know to look for it. Unless you actually wrote
[RIGHT]WaytooDear fatarsemonster
get well soon. I yamyamam notsorry about your sillyrebral vagzscular snotstem.[/RIGHT]
in which case the joke is on me ;)
I've ended a friendship today. That's upsetting to me because I never thought this friend would be such a fucking bitch to me.
Anyway, life goes on. Out with the dead weight. I guess now I have room for something or someone better.
oh that really sucks, sorry ali
Yeah a bit monster. Not nearly as much as your trials at the moment though. My issue seems very small in comparison.
Losing a friend isn't small. Sucks.
Carrot's hydro didn't go so well today. Poor lamb's all stiffened up and seems to have strained some of the muscles in his groin (similar to humans who have bad hips getting pain in the groin area) his gait is very uneven, almost double the stride length on his left side compared to his right. Usually after a few minutes on the treadmill he finds his rhythm and settles into it. This time we had to stop after 7 minutes.
I knew he wasn;t right. The last week and a half he's been intermittently exhibiting pain based behaviours (nipping and getting hyper) but difficult to isolate where it was coming from (back muscles? hipjoints?).
So we've to go his regular vets and discuss a possible short course of anti-inflammatories. The idea of which gives me a sinking feeling...seriously, already? He's only just turned one year old. Don't much like the idea of him being in pain though either, so hey ho. Needs must and all that.
Oh, the poor little guy. So sorry.
Jimmy Savile I think the first 2 letters of his last name are not necessary :mad2:
hereOr missing proper spacing:
Jimmy's a vile ...
The scale of the man's offending is truly shocking.
Update on Carrotchops: spoke to his regular vet today. She's only down at the local surgery on Thursdays, so was gearing up to maybe have to take him to the other branch (an hour's drive) but as it happens, she's booked solid til next Friday at either branch and is then off to stateside for a conference.
So, we're starting his acupuncture when she returns atthe end of the month. In the meantime she's suggested he does go for a short course of anti-inflammatory painkillers and I've booked him in with one of the other vets tomorrow morning.
He's been really out of sorts today, poor little sod. Like a kid when they're sick, all restless with no attention span.
Poor pup! Hope he feels better soon.
I feel like everyone's getting hit hard this January. Sending wishes for peace and healing out to all those who need them.
Poor Carrot! I hope the anti-inflammatories help. Sorry this is happening.
Jimmy Savile I think the first 2 letters of his last name are not necessary :mad2:
here
Vile doesn't begin to describe it. If investigations were dropped or allegations ignored, there should be major consequences. Over such a long time period, there had to be people who knew and kept silent.
Too bad he can't be prosecuted posthumously and his estate confiscated to go toward restitution to his victims.
Very best wishes out to Carrot and his continuing therapies.
Poor little Carrot! None of my business the deal you had with his breeder but I would have never sold anyone a dog with problems or I would have taken one back. I don't know how prevalent this is in Beardies makes me sad if they are just being knowledgeable in their breeding.
Yeah, I guess I assumed it was a rescue dog.
Generally speaking hip dysplasia can't be diagnosed until the dog is over 6 months old. Often older than that. Most dogs aren't routinely hip scored until around a year old. Those with dysplasia often display few to no symptoms during the early stages, with many not showing definite signs of problems until the joint is very badly damaged. It is quite common that dogs will suddenly appear to develop mobility problems, limps or lameness around 18 months old. We got him early with a diagnosis at just under 9 months.
It is a problem with most medium and large breeds. His parents were both within accepted/expected ranges for the breed on hip and elbow scoring. But that is never a guarantee. The breeder did nothing wrong, and he was to all intents and purposes a healthy, normal pup when she sold him.
Now...I thought I spotted something in his movements when I went to meet him at 4 months old. But I pushed it aside, because that is way too young to be able to tell something like that. Neither the breeder (her first litter) nor her husband (breeder of longstanding), nor the vet that checked the litter, nor the breeder's mentor (a very experienced breeder) saw anything that worried them.
As he got older, my niggling worry started to crystalise into something more definite.
I know the breeder would have been willing to take Carrot back and find other arrangements for him had I wanted that, but really...it's Carrot. I'd already decided I wanted him when I went to see him at 4 months. I took him on with the thought at the back of my mind that there may be something going on with his legs or hips. I already knew I wanted him. And if I was right and I was spotting something then someone was going to have to help him through this stuff. Might as well be me.
I have informed the breeder though. Because she may want to look at partnering Ellie with a different stud in future. All depends really on if the rest of the litter are affected and to what degree. Carrot's dysplasia (as far as we can tell from xrays and physical examination) is at the lower end of the scale. Merlot hasn't shown the same clumsiness or sensitivity that Carrot has, and their vet doesn't think there's a need to go down the xray and testing route with him. I don't know about the rest of the litter.
Nobody has done anything wrong. or rather, we've probably all done some stuff wrong and some stuff right. HD is partly down to genetic predisposition and partly environmental impact during early development. If the pups played too rough when they were together as a litter, early injuries can be what kicks off the skewed development. Or, they may be introduced to daily stairs climbing too young. The balance between genetic and environmental is still unknown. It's possible he was always going to have this, or it's possible he is like this because of early environmental issues. It's also possible that he'd have been a lot worse by now had I not got him checked several months before most people think it is necessary.
Yeah, I guess I assumed it was a rescue dog.
*grins*
You must have missed the puppysearch saga this time last year. I flew to Guernsey to meet Carrot the first time. Then he and two of his sibs came over to the mainland with another beardie owner on a ferry and we had to drive down south to get him.
This time last year I could tell you every kc registered beardie with a litter due, where they were based in the UK, and when they were expected.
Dana
I thought you had gone to knowledgeable breeders. I hope they are being supportive and I hope Carrot has a fabulous life with you.
I have a breed prone to dysplaisia Australian Cattle Dogs. Would never breed one before 2 years old because of this. The two I have now were tested {GOOD}but never bred. Its nice to see breeders doing the right thing and sometimes genetics is a crap shoot.
Just realised I said I spotted it when I met him at four months.... Should have read four weeks! I got him for keeps at 8 weeks
Breaks my heart that Carrot (and you) are going thru this. My goodness, Wyn and Carrot are almost the same age and I can't imagine how Wyn would respond or how upset I'd be if one of his little legs or a hip gave out on him.
Yesterday Wyn and I went for a long hike in an open area north of town. I can let him off the leash there, and I just have to laugh watching him paddle through the snow as fast as his little short legs will let him go (which is damn fast, btw). He beat me to the top of a steep hill where we both watched the sunset before scrambling down again, Wyn still leading the way on his little legs.
I'm sending good thoughts across the pond for Carrot's speedy treatment and recovery. May you both soon be climbing up to wonderful places of your own!
It's a shame Carrot has a problem, but since he does, I'm glad he's got the worlds best mom to take care of him. :thumb:
An angel left this earth on Thursday.
My ex's lifelong best friend, and housemate, died in his sleep. He had been sick and he thought he maybe had food poisoning. My ex went home after taking his dad somewhere and found him.
I am devastated. I loved him very much. He was a true genuine spirit, one of a kind. He was an artist, owner of a family owned jewelry store that has been in this town since the 1830s. He made jewelry for everyone in town, I think. He also took up painting, and painted a replica of Starry Night just for me. It's absolutely beautiful.
I can't stop thinking about him, and all those millions of memories. Man we had some times, all of us. I cry and cry and it won't stop the hurt...and I know how much it is hurting others.
It doesn't make sense, as these things never do.
I am at the public library which is part of the building that houses the store, and used to house our old bar. We used to sneak into this building and take tours, flashlights in hand, when it was falling to ruins. I sit here and look around and think of him.
I will miss him forever.
I'm so sorry to hear this im. I was just thinking of someone who may be on his way out as well and how he really isn't replaceable. Some people mark us and others do not...
So sorry to hear this Infi. He will live on in your many memories, but that doesn't help the pain you are feeling right now.
Sent by thought transference.
I'm so sorry for your loss, IM. Sending hugs.
Sorry for the loss of your dear friend, infi. Wishing you peace in your grief.
I'm so sorry for Jaydaan, DanaC and IM for all their troubles....and everyone's really.
Ever hear of the Pleasure Principle? It's when we get to die and NONE of this shit happens.
Personally, I can't wait. Cure me or kill me; I don't care which one but do it.
Binged. five days. scrounged some valiums to bring me down a bit softer. I hate; no, I LOATHE myself. I've done everything they tell me to do. I fail, I fail, I fail.
In light of what you all are going thru this is nada. but I want to be well or die. I'm sick of this POS existence, this loneliness that never ends (some days I'm okay with it but not when I'm coming down all by myself and NOT ONE AA PERSON CALLED TO SEE IF I WAS ALIVE. And I go to meetings, I go; I go. I read the big book, call my sponsor, do CBT, take meds and pray.
NOTHING WORKS.
Oh, I know. I'm not 'working the program'. if I WAS I'd be FINE.
if you had a progressive, chronic and terminal disease and they told you the cure was to drink coffee and talk about your problems-----what would you think? Voodoo? A joke? I'm sick; not bad. I have to keep reminding myself that.
and I'm very very lonely. I even miss my ex. I wish I had the guts to just DIE but it seems I've the constitution of a Cossack.
I hate hate hate myself.
Trilby ... you're right, this is an illness. Don't hate yourself. Sounds like you're not getting the support you need with your local AA. Are there any outpatient or inpatient programs you could get access to? Get a fresh perspective, some new support people, some new people to interact with in general?
PM me anytime. {{{{{hugs}}}}}
Trilby, honey, don't do this to yourself. I wish i could help. I think one of my best friends feels the way you do and my heart aches for your pain.
Thanks everyone for your kind words.
Sometimes the days consist of just getting through the days, you know?
Ach damn. Hugs all round. Infi, I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. Must have been such a shock. Tril, honey, I can't say I know where you're at, but I can say I'm with you in spirit. It is an illness, you are not 'bad'. In fact you're cool as fuck, and one of the reasons I love the Cellar. I just wish I was over there so we could hang out for real.
IM, I'm sorry for your loss. That's so random.
Tribly try to forgive yourself. You're your own harshest critic.
Infinity: I'm so sorry for your loss. :(
Triby: I'm so sorry you're hurting. :( I'm really bad with words and they come out wrong all the time, so I won't say much. Please just know that I wholeheartedly mean this with the best intentions. I hope you feel better soon.
Trilby, I think Ortho is right. Can you try to access some more supportive support? Meanwhile please don't beat yourself up, and know that we at teh Cellar are here for you. Sending you love and hugs x
Sent by thought transference
I feel like Lola, I care about you and I'm sad that you're hurting. I try to think of what I can say, and I come up empty. I'm not going to make suggestions or tell you what you've already heard.
Fuck that, I'll make just one suggestion... if something isn't working try something else! You know that life can feel like a marvelous gift when you hit the right feeling. All these depressants aren't going to do it, and the support you currently have isn't going to do it, but SOMETHING WILL GODDAMMIT.
IM so sorry {{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}:sniff:
Trilby Love yourself the most. It is what's best.
A friend died Monday he was 44. This was someone we saw or talked to once or twice a week.
I can't help but think that if his Mother, his only real family {has a daughter who is 7 but he was divorced} had done more he would have had a chance. I have thought about this all week. My husband and I had known him for 30+years and we tried to talk to him about his drinking. Talked to his mother. Talked to his ex wife before she was an ex. No matter how bad he was we always talked to him and tried to help him. Since we are not related we could only watch him deteriorate.
We never got an answer from his mother when we would ask her to have him committed even if he did not quit maybe 30 days forced sobriety may have given him a chance. His wife gave up on him and I don't blame her but her ultimatums certainly didn't work.
We always called holidays unless he called us first. Christmas our calls were not returned and NewYears passed and when we called still no answer. We had a feeling something was wrong. We called a friend who had info that he was in the hospital.
His mother called us about 3 hours after he had passed crying saying she had no idea anything was wrong. I listened to her and asked her if there was anything we could help her do, all the while I was thinking "what do you mean you didn't know anything was wrong? There was something wrong for years." I just feel that it was so sad that no one loved him enough to do something! Didn't he love his daughter enough or himself enough to live?
I guess he didn't
Love yourself most Trilby...You can be in control...The binge has stopped, one day at a time :hug:
Nirvana, thank you for that. It helped me in some ways, too. I can't give details but know that your post helped me.
Bri I've just read your post.
Don't slice yourself up about it. It's a lapse. You do not do this all the time. You do not live on a constant bender. Of course the come-down, knowing you have had sobriety before, it going to be even more punishing.
Just remember drink-guilt is mostly chemical. Yes it hurts when you look back, but never as badly as the first couple of days.
Keep going baby. No surrender-monkeys in your house.
You have some people IRL that really love you and can offer real support, esp your Good Sister.
And there are plenty of people on here (and we are all real, just communicating by keyboard) who love you too. This is a mixed up, mother-fuck, shook-up world. Drinking hurts you and it hurts us because we worry about you. But I would suspect that most of the people on here do not judge you for it, any more than someone deciding against all medical advice to stop taking their meds.
One of the many things I value about you is your sheer fucking honesty. I've spoken to you loaded. You've come back here after benders. You've not claimed flu or being busy or a slip on the ice, which you could easily have done and been believed (this is not to say people suffering those ailments are dishonest!)
You are intelligent, turn an awesome phrase, write comedic anecdotes well, are true, wear your heart on your sleeve with all the pain that entails, let us into your life, still look amazing, and are a grumpy cynical crone. And a lush and a flirt and my favourite ever not-quite-lost cause (as long as I can be yours).
Sorry to all the others feeling pain and suffering.
I'm on the same road as Bri and drinking/ not-drinking is my current struggle.
Much love Infi and Nirv.
'thank you, Sundae' doesn't quite express how I feel about your post --- but thank you. You've been a rock of sense and friendship from the very beginning.
Perseverance is it's own reward, right? I don't want to die drunk. Not for me but for my boys. They don't deserve that.
*heart* you are a bestie in every way.
(PS to all the others suffering from non self-inflicted wounds---sundae is right when she says we are on the same road so I'm sorry if we seem self involved in this matter; cancer was easy compared to this thing I've got. anyway, I read all the posts here and wonder why I complain at all when others are going thru much tougher things and I feel for everyone who hurts, even dwellars I'm not close to....so know that I read your posts here and find gratitude and appreciate your sharing because we need to listen to each others' stories-----it helps me, anyway, feel less alone.)
If you sprain your ankle, it hurts like hell. Then you read somebody else broke their leg and you sympathize, but that doesn't mean your ankle doesn't hurt like hell anymore. ;)
Sundae! Trilby!! Get a room you two!! ;)
And take pictures... lots and lots of pictures. :luv:
a few days ago I posted that I'd ended a friendship. It's definitely over. During the course of the last few days I've had a number of calls an messages from mutual friends about the situation (none instigated by me. My intention was to just let it die quietly) wanting to know what's going on.
Apparently this ex friend has embarked on full character assassination.
On the flip side, no one's buying into it. In fact, if this person doesn't stop soon, she's going to end up with no friends.
Very sad for her, cause she needs them.
a few days ago I posted that I'd ended a friendship. It's definitely over. During the course of the last few days I've had a number of calls an messages from mutual friends about the situation (none instigated by me. My intention was to just let it die quietly) wanting to know what's going on.
Apparently this ex friend has embarked on full character assassination.
On the flip side, no one's buying into it. In fact, if this person doesn't stop soon, she's going to end up with no friends.
Very sad for her, cause she needs them.
given enough rope most people hang themselves. Just sit back, act classy and see what unfolds.
given enough rope most people hang themselves. Just sit back, act classy and see what unfolds.
And if that doesn't work, go round and kick her in the cunt.
Then she'll have somethng to complain about!
Tril, that's kind of what I was doing. Most of this unfolded last week, and I saw most of the girls on the weekend at a picnic we had, but I didn't mention a thing. Apparently the nasty phone calls started on Saturday night after the picnic which ex friend didn't go to.
Believe me, a lot of them are shocked at the things this person is saying. They're so far fetched they don't even believe it. No one wants to tell me what she's been saying though, so it must be awesome. lol
Sundae, I don't think I'll waste any effort getting physical with this woman. It's not really my style for starters and she's doing a pretty good job of beating herself up without any help from me anyway. ;)
So uhmm...
I got kicked out school
Bummer tora. What does that mean for you now then? And why did you get kicked out?
I'm thinking of resigning from my job.
To do what? That's what the 'rents are worried about. Never mind my high blood pressure, two anti-depressants, one anti-anxiety, and constant gastric distress (ulcers maybe?.)
I was on one anti-d when I started here.
I've never not excelled at everything I've tried except sales. My chance to 'shine' and explain my difficulties (while repeating the huge number that is my responsibility...to keep me a bit anonymous let's say closer to 100 million dollars than to 50 million dollars) while the office is restructured have been met with...oh the tinge of implication that I can't prioritize, that I'm doing something wrong, that I'm lazy, that I'm crazy...
My talking with consultants, leaders, HR...all deaf ears, while at the same time making changes right and left to accomodate cow orkers.
To sit in a staff meeting and be told the reason part of my paperwork (that any monkey could process) has such a quick proclaimed turn around time as opposed to two months for another process is that they 'have other responsibilities.' Really? Oh, yeah, and I don't. I won't see any of you in July just as I don't see you now giving a crap about the magnitude of my job. Instead, a MIss Thang who is about the lowest on the totem pole can run cry to bigwigs that we don't ask 'how high' because she snapped her fingers and negates all the extra things I do, every term, that takes hours, that save enrollments to the tune of hundreds of students. When students come to my desk and tell me no one has EVER helped them like I did, or showed them respect. Unbelievable.
But egad: whatever will I do? If my job goes the world ends. Did you know that? Apparently, that is the way it is to MY friends and family. Suck it up. It's just a job. Commit fraud if it helps you achieve your goals. It's your fault, you've fucked it all up somehow (and how? I've been working since I was a young teen and never fucked anything up as it relates to my work ability.) Let the job change you. Let it make you bitter and unethical. Go in every day and feel like the red-headed stepchild. YOu HAVE to. You have children to think of. Except I don't. Your sissy law survived it. Maybe I need to get me a successful husband so I have an equally soft mattress to fall back on, so I can just check out of the employment world altogether. Becasue you know, none of that was her fault. Like it will be your fault. Or be like the other sissy law who is super super woman. That's who I should be.
If only I were MORE perfect. If only I were BETTER. It can't be the fault of anyone but ME. Right? Yes, let's make sure that your feelings about how much I suck match mine.
Ranting. Hurting. Fuck it. All. of it.
Sometimes is never quite enough
If you're flawless, then you'll win my love
Don't forget to win first place
Don't forget to keep that smile on your face
Be a good boy
Try a little harder
You've got to measure up
And make me prouder
How long before you screw it up
How many times do I have to tell you to hurry up
With everything I do for you
The least you can do is keep quiet
Be a good girl
You've gotta try a little harder
That simply wasn't good enough
To make us proud
I'll live through you
I'll make you what I never was
If you're the best, then maybe so am I
Compared to him compared to her
I'm doing this for your own damn good
You'll make up for what I blew
What's the problem, why are you crying
Be a good boy
Push a little farther now
That wasn't fast enough
To make us happy
We'll love you just the way you are
If you're perfect
--Alanis Morissette
anon- I was in very much the exact same position at work as an RN (and, as an Xray tech, too) I took drugs to cope (plus, you know, the 'i'm an addict thing') but working in health care is what REALLY took me down. The utter incompetence, the sheer uncaring attitudes, the fights between depts (hey, I thought we were all in this together to help the patient but apparently not) the pettiness, the backstabbing, the lying and the other liar swears to it, I went from one job to another trying to find my niche and never, ever finding it. People either hated me or loved me; it was never a neutral thing. administers hated me mostly b/c I brought up topics everyone was concerned about and talked about (10 patients to one nurse) I'd say that was unsafe in a 'formal' meeting and guess how many of my cow orkers supported me? right. none. They'd all look at their hands and murmur "Oh, we can manage..." then something horrid would happen and they'd spend 30,000 dollars on a 'consultant' to help them figure out WE WERE UNDERSTAFFED. It was brilliant.
I worked for one of the most unethical women on the planet and SHE hated me because I got work done. I work smart, not hard. I made her look bad. I was on top of this shit. I hated her with a pure white-hot hatred and the feeling was mutual. She was a high school grad who'd worked her way up (after fifty years) to boss of Accident and Emergency and she'd tell RN's how to do their jobs. One time I was at a deposition for an employee and the lawyer asked what gave her the right to voice a medical opinion and she said, "Forty years of experience". She was pure evil. If an employee dropped a wrench she'd drug test them. It was her or my sanity (she did all kinds of illegeal things)and one day I asked for a sign, felt like I got it and quit.
Woooooboy. Then the fun started. yeah, I had problems of my own----but I never drank on the job or before the job ---- just on the way home. I hated everything I did. It was killing me. Traditional health care was NOT my path and it took me two degrees, loads of humiliation and more for me to realize I was not where I was meant to be.
My family had a fucking cow. My father had paid for all my schooling (because he picked what I was going to do----I wanted liberal arts but he wouldn't pay for that "crap") he wanted me to have a job, goddamnit! Preferably one that made me misreble and suicical and insane. My jobs directly affected both my marriages negatively; I started to hate EVERYONE and became paranoid that nobody wanted anything but to manipulate me. "Hey, can you hand me that pen?" and I'd think "What's her true agenda?" I was nuts. the job MADE me nuts. i didn't even know I was nuts until I worked for the State of Ohio in psyche and saw all these horrible, unhappy, grey-faced, burned-out THUGS antagonizing the patients for their amusement and I said something about that. We had 'mental health techs' who were ex go-go dancers. Oh, yes, we did. Most of our staff was on more meds than our patients. I told them they were going straight to hell and you know what? That place closed a year or so later. It was SOOOOO Abusive.
Then someone I trusted said, "you know, working 7p to 7a is inhumane," and I thought, yeah, it IS inhumane. I fucking quit. My dad hated me anyway so what was that to me? and look! I'm still here! I am NOT homeless, i have food (hot dogs, not steak, but hey) I struggle every month to pay the bills but that's my own fault.
Im not telling you to do anything. I'm just telling you I jumped and landed ok. I don't know if the same will happen to you. but it's possible.
It's like the only way I see out, to save my face which is apparently more important than saving my life...is to be seriously injured, seriously sick, or dead. And I've thought of these things. Every time someone tells me how lucky I am. Every time I am discounted or ignored when I try to talk about these things. Every time I sit here and listen to the golden children get accolades for planning a party in their spare time (which is pretty expansive, that spare time) and every time I am looked down upon chastised or just asked "WHY is that the way it is" when I've told a million times WHY it is the way it is...all I can think of is a good way to just check out. Without bearing the brunt of knowing what a fuckup everyone thinks I am.
No I don't really want to die. But I want to be out of it. I want to go away. I am back to wanting to run my car off a cliff. There aren't many happy noments intersecting all the crap right now. Very few laughs keepign me going. But I am not important. I used to be. I used to be considered really really good. No one cares. so why do I bother?
Assuming you are a grown person anon, and you can tell me to fuck right off but you have to quit caring so much what other people think especially relatives. Unless they are providing financial support their opinion is like their asshole...It is so freeing to please yourself. You can only live your life for yourself. Find something you love to do and try to make money doing it and make other people happy. You seem to be making other happy doing what you are doing, maybe you can find joy in that maybe not but don't cut off your nose to spite your face. Take care of number 1 YOU!
Gotta agree with Nirv. It's easy to suggest but damned hard to follow.
I did it. But I only managed it because my parents let me live here.
Living as an adult child at home is bloody hard on everyone, but doing a job I love makes me a real person again. It's also allowed me to face health problems which before I would have exacerbated hoping they would kill me sooner rather than later.
If you are that close to the edge - not a judgement, just something for you to think about - then money is a fairly minor concern. Family opinion is a minor concern. It doesn't feel like that, but if you leave these people it will hurt them for the rest of their lives.
Don't judge yourself against other people. Excuse me while I go off and laugh for half an hour at my hypocrisy at typing that. I judge myself against my sister ALL THE TIME. I am jealous. I am envious. I desperately want her to love me and can't understand why she doesn't. And I am never compared to her now. Never, not ever. I just soaked up too much of it as a child. Also I was the second daughter. No special status for me.
Anyway, seems I turned your pain and misery into a post about myself.
See? You can do the same ;)
I feel for you Anon. Mostly because I know who you are and care about you.
Say "fuck it" and go and volunteer in Borneo for a couple of months. What can you lose that you haven't already worried about?
Love and hope.
What Nirvana said. And I think you would be much happier in a new line of work.
I was immediately reminded of that story about the president and the three envelopes:
Upon entering the white house, the new president receives a note from the outgoing president. It says that the three sealed envelopes numbered 1, 2, and 3. In each is a piece of advice on how to handle a crisis.
The first crisis hits and the president's popularity plummets. He opens the first envelope "Blame your predecessor" it says. He does so, and his ratings rebound.
After a while, the president encounters another lack of confidence from the voters. He opens the second envelope "Fire some cabinet members". He does so, and again his popularity rebounds.
A third time, a crisis hits. He opens the third envelope. "Prepare three envelopes" it reads.
My take-away is that you can't win in this situation and neither will your successor.
Another thing to look at is, in how many of your previous jobs did you have a similar problem? If this isn't an isolated incident it could be that you are a poor judge of jobs, or subconsciously pick jobs that are familiarly disastrous.
I realized after about 4 or 5 times that I tend to get involved with narcissistic borderline women. They all looked quite different, I don't have a physical type as much as a psychological type. I told my therapist I was no longer going to pick out my own girlfriends any longer, or at least have them vetted first.
Sorry you are having to endure non-cress people.
I am that close to the edge. The only relief from the pain is to self-inflict pain. People are whispering amongst themselves, giggling, sounding important, going to meetings, acting important.
I used to be important. I used to be respected. I wish I would get shot. I wish the building would catch fire and I'd just sit here. Beating myself up, litterally, only helps for a minute.
I'm not trying to be a basketcase. The fact is, I am a basketcase. People think you can fake being a basketcase but you cannot. Not like this. I'm not exaggerating or trying to get attention.
It's like the only way I see out, to save my face which is apparently more important than saving my life...is to be seriously injured, seriously sick, or dead.
No I don't really want to die. But I want to be out of it. I want to go away. I am back to wanting to run my car off a cliff. There aren't many happy noments intersecting all the crap right now. Very few laughs keepign me going. But I am not important. I used to be. I used to be considered really really good. No one cares. so why do I bother?
I know who you are too, and I apologize for making your problem about me and what I went thru. My motive was to let you know I know just how fucked up a work place can be. My two sisters looooooooooove their jobs. The most fun I had working was being a waitress but I was young and cute then so it would be much, much different now.
Meds. Sounds like you need to make an appointment to tweak them or at least talk to your doctor. I know the feeling of wanting to run off the road just to get some relief...it's a dangerous feeling. I also know you don't want to die but you feel like you are dying a slow death in the trap of your workplace. If you call your doc today, at least you will have done one healthy thing for yourself today. You will have a goal to stick around for that day when you can see him or her and get some relief. I've found crying like a hysterical nutcase in their office tends to bring them out of their zombie-like daze and help. God, I remember what it was like. It was unbearable.
And it's not you, sweetie; it's them. It really, really is them. Dysfunctional people will come together like magnets and ostrasize the one normal among them b/c they're terrible people and they want everyone to be terrible.
I wish I had a magic wand...
>wss<
I know who you are too anon, and I wish I was there to hug you and make you a cup of tea :hug:
Here's a good one. I had a little rant on FB (stupid, i know) about how NONE of my so-called pals in AA called while I was gone for 2 weeks. Dead? Alive? Who cares?
I then deleted it, feeling like a jerk but one AA fb 'pal' saw it.
today she put up a picture of a little bird braving a freezing snow storm, his little head tucked in from the wind with the words "This too shall pass"
and I felt like saying two things: yes, it will pass but with the pain of the biggest kidney stone you ever saw; and yes, but it's not passing quickly enough and i want to pass with it.
Hugs, anon.
I am not doing well. I am considering the looney bin. It won't stop until I make it stop. I can't tell you the pain I'm in. I can't do this I can't i can't.
I don't know what to do.
You need to leave work. Go home. Take a nap.
Think office space.
Oh and just walk out, don't tell anyone anything.
Scared.
What if I really am crazy? No...the shit around here is that fucked up. I need to get through today (and a funeral tonight :( ) and make a plan.
I have spies who look for my car, don't you know? I am 12 years old. I haven't the sense god gave a rock.
Dear anon,
Please quit your job. Please visit your doc for a meds tweak. Please look after yourself. You are loved and valued for being you, even by your family, even though they seem to want to keep you imprisoned in a job you hate. Truly. Look after yourself.
Sent by thought transference.
i don't know who you are, but giving up and quiting on life is never the answer. i'm a nut case and you have to learn to live with it. remember, you can always run away and change your name. get a fresh start. i already have my bug out planned just in case things get really bad
Thanks everyone. I'm so sorry. I am so far gone right now. I will be embarrassed someday when I feel better, if I get back on the upswing. But I'm the lowest I've been in years, since I ran my hand through a window just to get away from the abuse and was taken to the looney bin. Even that felt like a relief. So you're getting a lot of info I"ve not given before. Can you love me less or hate me more for being such a loser?
I'm so so sorry. I didn't know where else to turn. I will contact a psych doc. I promise.
I am a leper. When did I become that? I've always been loved. I've always done really well at things I do. I've even been admired. Now I'm just shit. And I can't deal wtih beiong shit.
I will get help. I promise.
What Trilby said this too shall pass
What foot said leave work, tell them you are too upset by your friend's passing and you HAVE TO GO HOME! Take a bath have a cup of tea get ready to say good bye to your friend. One thing at a time...
So uhmm...
I got kicked out school
Bummer tora. What does that mean for you now then? And why did you get kicked out?
bump
what the ??? I don't even.
Ok. what happened?
Yes, mods. Can we please take out my pitiful cries for help from death to another thread so that I don't step on any more toes? BV knows when and where he's needed, by god, and we don't want to upset any delicate fucking balance for him.
Toro, I do care about your school. I just didn't know where else to put this and I am trying to keep myself from hurting myself.
But BV is right: it's about time we stopped talking about me and started going back to make sure we don't miss anyone. Go V, thanks for at once knowing who to care about and who not to. You're charmed that way, arent' you?"
In fact, delete the whole fucking mess. Who cares.
I do.
Sent by thought transference
He was probably going down the posts and Toro's was before yours , we WANT TO TALK ABOUT YOU BECAUSE YOU ARE IMPORTANT.
I do. I care too.
" He was probably going down the posts and Toro's was before yours "
Nirv, that's very charitable of you. The "bump" kind of says not so.
But anon, many of us care very deeply. yes, we are uncomfortable but it's because we care and don't know what to do or say, not because we don't think it's important. it's hella important. Please stop and get help. Your current situ is a pile of crap by all accounts. You ended up there because you were good at your job. apparently some people think that gold-coating lead will make it desirable. idiot people. seems like they thought you would shine brightly enough their crap would stop stinking. "anon -so awesome their effect crosses the sense barrier!" But now you're sinking in the crap weighed down by their lead and they can't see your shine and are too stupid to realize what they've done. get out of there. now.
I will get help.
Just so you all know you did help. I am over the roughest part now. I can see beyond the next five minutes.
I am so very grateful for your kind words and caring. I know I'm a basketcase but I'm your basketcase. I obviously need to make changes...I ain't outta no woods yet, not by a long shot.
-make an appointment
-fix resume
-send resume
-get out of here
-laugh in July about the mess they won't have any idea how to fix. Poetic justice, thought I won't even know about it directly. I'll know.
I thought the bump was to emphasise the 'wtf?' to Toro. because it does sound like it is a big deal, and it had the misfortune to land just as something really major was happening to another dwellar and so hadn't been picked up by anyone. I don't think, and V can correct me if I'm wrong, that it was a dig or criticism of Anon's predicament or its place in this thread. It was giving some attention to Toro, not removing it from Anon :P
@ Anon: Jesus fucking wept, mate, what a shitty situation. I can't offer any great advice other than to echo what's already been said by others: find a way out of that job asap, and try not to let the opinions of others, family especially, undermine your own sense of the world. You know the job is fucking with you. It is making you unhappy. There's nothing lucky, or warranting gratitude in an unhappy worklife. And there's no virtue in sticking to something you hate. If they don't understand the extent of your misery, they cannot possibly judge your response to it.
Wish I could think of something useful or helpful to say. Fraid alls I have is another declaration of caring. *hugs babe*
Dana, and EVERYONE...Really, you've all said useful things. You helped SO much. I was pretty worried about myself.
And yes, please let's get back to Toro. I am sorry Toro. What happened, if you want to talk about it?
We are here...as you can see: I found my comfort here. Today. And it helped.
A heartfelt banality: I hope your situation improves soon, anon.
I recently made the decision not to go back to my job as a teacher in the fall. Our pockets will be hurting, but the job's just not worth it when it sucks the soul out of you. I hope you can find a place that treats you as a human being deserves to be treated -- with dignity, respect, and caring. :flower:
Anon, I'm glad you're through the worst of it today. I hope it gets better for you. I'm glad the others were here to help you through.
dear anon
I intended no offense. I am concerned about toranokaze and I'm concerned about you. I'm glad you're through the worst of it now. DanaC explained well; I can not improve on it so I won't try.
Yours,
Wishing everybody well, hope things get better
Sorry I'm not around, not uncaring just unwell
ortho - take care of yourself too
I wondered about you O hope you feel better soon.
'Anon- quit the job. you CAN do it. Read "The Consolations of Philosophy" by Alain de Botton and focus on Epicurus. I went from making 58,000 in 2005 to 18 and change now and I'm fine if I don't go nuts at stores and buy stuff I don't need-----like yet another pair of earrings etc. 58 to 18 is HUGE but you know what? I'm much happier (mostly-sometimes I'm lonely) I can go nearly a month on a tank of gas, my creativity has started to return and I have time to learn what life is instead of trying to please odious supervisors who lived to kill souls. I went back to school at 43 and I know you're younger than me (and I got a completely useless degree but it meant something to ME) I qualified for FAFSA; maybe you can, too. Study something you adore or have always wanted to. Get an extended LOA or FMLA. If you stick to the hysterical crying in the doc's office, or say certain things, I'm sure he or she will fill out the paperwork. My sister did that FMLA thing when she was in another job and her supervisor was bananas.
the real question is: how do all these nutjobs get into management? They're not good with people, they're not good with managing anything...oh yeah. They're sociopaths who smooch the ass of the one above. Some of the people I've worked with I wonder how they sleep at night. Use this energy to change things for yourself and when your family asks you why you're doing this say "because it makes me happy." and smile. you don't need to explain it to them----they wouldn't get it anyway.
you matter. You matter, you're important and you're no mistake. You are made of star stuff.
anon, it's good to see you've had so much support here during this low period today. I guess that's what most of us like about this place. Knowing there's usually someone around who cares enough to listen even if that's all that can be done. It's heartening to see you've got a plan in place. Please be kind to yourself and stick to it. Things just seem totally out of control for you now, so maybe having a 'get better' type of plan might give you the focus you need to drag yourself up by your boot straps.
Aden just quit his part time job because he's sick of the politics. A big thing for him, but small in comparison to your issues, but just an example of someone else going out on a limb because they're sick of the shit at a workplace.
It will all work out. It's always scary, but there are thousands of stories about people leaving shitty jobs and walking into something great that they would have missed out on if they'd stayed for the torture instead.
The thing that's upsetting me today is worry about a friend who is currently under the knife having a brain cancer cut out. He had the first one cut out last year, but it's grown back. He's going to be left with facial scaring and some paralysis and numbness in half of his face. He is going to lose his ear canal, but is positive about getting a cochliar implant after this op is over. Anyway, I guess we all have challenges to face. I hope we all come through them well.
you know====this whole thing, all this depression and anxiety and dread is smacking of January. January and July---the two suckiest months in the year (my apologies to those born in those months----your zodiac sign isn't a reflection of the month but of the stars. I was born in Feb (along with the fabulous DanaC) which is also a sucky month but short, so that counts, and has nothing to do with me being a Pisces.
There is certainly a lot of January about at this time of year.
Anon, Trilby has some fabulous advice here, the bit I like best (apart from "quit the job") is this: "when your family asks you why you're doing this say "because it makes me happy." and smile. You don't need to explain it to them----they wouldn't get it anyway. "
I was wrong to feel good for a few minutes.
The new bitch said I have to submit a doctor's note for being sick Monday. That isn't the policy as far as I know. Doctor's note if more than 3 days absent. She's out to get me and it fucking sucks. Why don't they just fire me?
Jesus fucking christ what did I ever do to deserve this? Did she require the same of S who was out monday and part of yesterday? I doubt it. I really fucking doubt it. And when E was calling in with migraines she made sure to tell HER that she should sign up for FMLA to protect herself.
It's taking everything I have to not email back "You stupid fucking cunt. Shove it up your ass."
Mother fucking fuck. They are trying to kill me. They really are. I don't want to do any more of this giant project if that's how it's gonna be. I'm not gonna wrap it up all fucking nice so they don't have the mess to deal with when I'm gone.
How much more pain can I take? How much more can they shove me around? And fucking WHY?
Time to invoke FMLA except I don't trust HR either and I don't know where to start. I feel like slicing my wrists just so they have blood to deal with. They'd see me before I died but I could bleed all over her, screaming...and they won't be happy until I'm shut up in the psych ward.
God damm this hurts.
ok. calm down. Find out if it really IS the policy. She's creating a hostile work environment.
NOTHING is worth this, honey. NOTHING. Go to the ER and rant and freak and you'll get some help pronto and they will have to shut up about it (HIPPA)
make notes.
The caveat "at supervisor's discretion."
I'm freaking out. I feel like sticking this fork in my fucking eye. I can't fucking take this. I can't listen to this anymore. I don't deserve it. It's killing me.
Someone has to help me. My family won't help me. I'm losing it.
I can't live like this. What should I do? what should I do?
go to HR and ask for the FMLA paperwork and say nothing else.
get to the doc's ASAP - scream and threaten if you have to - have them fill out the FMLA and you get a break to gain perspective, get better, etc.
do it. don't say anything to anyone. NO ONE.
PS when I left the Most Evil Woman in the World I took my rolodex with me.
dick move, I know as the other nurses then had to figure it out; but hey. They didn't exactly support me either. I would get pleasure thinking they'd go looking for a number and .....ooops! Not there! I also didn't teach anyone the case management program. No one asked to be taught, I'd given two weeks notice, I figured it was their problem for not being pro=active. That gave me some happiness too, knowing they were dickless for a while. I drew the line at ruining the Xray film. That would only hurt the patient; but I thought about it. I thought about exposing the entire bin of film (there's no way you can tell if it's been exposed) so all their xrays would come out blacker than the ace of spades...when I walked out of there I felt the world slide off my shoulders.
do it before you lose control of the situation and decisions are made FOR you. you don't want that, believe me.
Please do what Trilby says. She knows. Please do. And particularly don't explain to anyone you don't have to by law.
doctor told mem to go to er. I have to tell someone that is what I was advicsed by my physician.
I will be in toucn when I can.
oh anon :( good luck in the ER. I'm sure I don't wish the evil bitch the worst upset tummy ever invented on the day of her next appraisal. I'm sure I don't.
good for you. Now. Breathe. drive safely. be in touch when you can. it's over for now.
we love you.
doctor told mem to go to er. I have to tell someone that is what I was advicsed by my physician.
Good for you. You can do this.
I am relief. she needs this. Now let's say a collective prayer that she gets some real fkking help with some compassionate people instead of the burned out messes that usually work the ER. Please Universe, take good care of anon. She feels too much right now and needs to know You are there, are taking care of her and that You love her. Get her to the right ER, right Doc, right nurses, etc.
thank you.
I don't exactly know how you feel, but I certainly remember being at the end of my tether.
Grief at home, awful job - the only pleasure I has was riding on buses. I used to get off at Oxford Circus to take the 172. It extended my journey by about an hour and a half. Shitty, shitty life.
Seriously. nothing is worth this. You work hard. You make a difference. Fuck them if they can't see that. Quit and take a low pressure job in a bar or a supermarket or a sandwich shop. You'll get bored of it on the second day, but pretty much everyone will be nice to you. And it will give you the push you need to get back into something fulfilling.
Wish you had a financial safety net over there. When I moved back to Aylesbury, Dani suggested I went on Disability Benefit. It was 100% the right thing to do. I had the time to volunteer at a school. The school I now work at. The only way I could be happier with my job is if they paid me 5x my salary so I could get a place of my own.
Readjust your perception of failure, Anon.
Your fambly might not like the decisions you make, but they're a lot better than having to read that note.
Anon, you may want to get a lawyer and sue all their asses for just about anything and everything. See what sticks. They'll settle just to be done with the suit. Take the $ go on a nice Vaca then come be my marketing director.
Please keep us updated. I care and I feel so helpless because I am so far away. Do you think you can feel the hug I'm trying to send you?
Anon: *hugs* let us know how you get on m'dear. Hope the ER people can offer some kind of help through this crisis.
Please keep us updated. I care and I feel so helpless because I am so far away. Do you think you can feel the hug I'm trying to send you?
Remember that when you "disappear" Sarge.
Not cracking the whip - you kinky sod - just reminding you that people on here worry about
you too x
I spoke with someone.
She is where she needs to be; talking with someone she needs to talk to so she's getting help RIGHT NOW which is a relief. She's in a good place and i told the person if she felt like calling Trilby she could and here's my number. She needs to rest. Hopefully she'll get some.
Remember that when you "disappear" Sarge.
Not cracking the whip - you kinky sod - just reminding you that people on here worry about you too x
yeah!
But AA friends you've known for years IRL? when you disappear, they don't bother even calling.
fucked up world.
saw my counselor yesterday and she recounted all I'd survived and I just looked at her and said, "Yeah, like a cockroach," coz that's how I felt.
How to get out of this?
We're both survivors baby.
You need to come over here and meet Seb - he's lush.
Fuck alcohol.
Now that you're out of my life
I'm so much better
You thought that I'd be weak without you
But I'm stronger
Is Seb some new kind of drug?
I thought I told you to shush?!
He's like a drug. Yummy young counsellor.
I think he's Jewish. He has a David Baddiel/ Louis Theroux thing going on.
she recounted all I'd survived and I just looked at her and said, "Yeah, like a cockroach," coz that's how I felt
CBT... your internal story about yourself is actually wrong, and you have to change it.
I just heard from anon. they are safe.
I have spoken to anon and she has given me permission to tell you all she is going to be admitted for a few days at Upper Valley Medical Center in Piqua OH.
She sounded relieved to be getting help. I'm so, so glad. i know what that's like the Thelma and Louise ending.
UT- you're right. but bc of my recent binger (5 days) my brain chemistry is fooked. I see a red door and I want it painted black....all that shite till the etoh clears. And I hate myself for drinking. i hate myself more than anyone here (even merc!) could hate me for doing it. but I do it. I do it.
but thank you bc you brought me back to real sense. Anon's stuff brought up a lot of stuff----circle of life and all that, right? At least she's safe.
I'm glad she's getting help.
Thanks everyone. Awaiting transport to the bin. Phone dying but the charger is in my purse which is locked.
T
My goal being to figure out what i need to do and how to do it. Not blindly crazy but with self-assurance. I love you all for caring. Thnks, more than you know.
I'm so glad help is at hand. Rest, be peaceful. Take your time. We'll be here for you.
Sent by thought transference
Whew I don't have the pit in my stomach thank goodness and keep us posted. Our hand is on your back!
Best wishes and lots of healing your way!
So my ekg doesnt match the one from when i was here for my back. I might be going to cardiac floor instead. I dont know what that means.
welcome back pit in stomach :eek: Probably just a precaution. I am wondering if your meds are all wonky..
So my ekg doesnt match the one from when i was here for my back. I might be going to cardiac floor instead. I dont know what that means.
it means you get more attentive care.
Take care of yourself infi. We're pulling for you.
We're pulling for you.
:eek: Stop that right this minute! You're a married man and father of daughters! :eek: :eek:
So you're the only one who can have a stroke around here?
I'll show you how to properly have wanker's cramp.
snip--
Time to invoke FMLA except I [SIZE="4"]don't trust HR[/SIZE] either and I don't know where to start. --snip--
God damm this hurts.
[SIZE="3"]go to HR and ask for the FMLA paperwork and say nothing else.[/SIZE]
get to the doc's ASAP - scream and threaten if you have to - have them fill out the FMLA and you get a break to gain perspective, get better, etc.
do it. don't say anything to anyone. NO ONE.
Wow. I picked a bad day to bypass this thread for a few hours. I'm so sorry you're in this avalanche of shit. I see you have gotten some assistance (YAY!). I want to contribute this affirmation: You're not crazy, bad shit is being dumped on you. Also, HR is not your friend. They work for the company, they might dish out stuff you can find useful, but they're not there for you, they're their to manage the company's resources that happen to be people.
Fuck. Good luck.
Our hand is on your back!
Mine's on yer ass.
You did the right thing, honey. First step is the biggest. You'll be okay now.
Being on the cardiac unit means you'll be hooked up to an ekg the entire time you're there-lots of wires to disconnect from, etc. but also you WILL get better care and now they have physical proof that the job is stressing you out. Did they mention what the 'abnormality' was? Typically it's Atrial fib for stress. also when one of the leads comes off they come into the room and snap it back on to you which happens a lot.
get all the help you can. tell them everything that's going on at work and how you're being treated, past history, let it rip. The more they know about the stress of your life (live alone, hateful job with loathsome people, ex homeless guy bf, family nonsupportive, etc. etc., the more they can help you. Your NOT complaining your giving them history. let them know how bad it has gotten; your thoughts; your urges to drive your car into a ditch just to get out of work....it's ok. They've heard it all before, believe me, and they KNOW you're not crazy.
Love and good wishes, Claudette
Being on the cardiac unit means you'll be hooked up to an ekg the entire time you're there-lots of wires to disconnect from, etc. but also you WILL get better care and now they have physical proof that the job is stressing you out. Did they mention what the 'abnormality' was? Typically it's Atrial fib for stress. also when one of the leads comes off they come into the room and snap it back on to you which happens a lot.
get all the help you can. tell them everything that's going on at work and how you're being treated, past history, let it rip. The more they know about the stress of your life (live alone, hateful job with loathsome people, ex homeless guy bf, family nonsupportive, etc. etc., the more they can help you. Your NOT complaining your giving them history. let them know how bad it has gotten; your thoughts; your urges to drive your car into a ditch just to get out of work....it's ok. They've heard it all before, believe me, and they KNOW you're not crazy.
Love and good wishes, Claudette
And if you want somwthing in the night, just pull a wire off. mine fell off all the time and they kept waking me to fix it. I'm relying on you to wreak my revenge ;)
Yeah, Tril is right. Just spit it all out. Once all the cards are on the table it'll be much easier for them to assess what your needs are, and what sort of help you can get. Also spending time in hospital might give your family the wake up call they need?
I'm with those who say to just get out of the job and find something simpler. The stress is not worth it mate. Life isn't about putting up with shit. I don't really know what it is about, but I do know it's not about that.
It's great that you're getting some help. You'll be in my thoughts during this period. You're doing the right thing. xxx
My first thought about the EKG was also that the stress has driven your blood pressure right up, or caused another physical sign (like atrial fibrillation). And I'm right there with the other Dwellars who are saying give the medics ALL the history, every detail, everything we've seen here plus the stuff you even held back from US :eek:! Please take this opportunity to get well. Rest. And quit that fucking job.
BigV - I wanted to address this last night but was too tired but I will here now.
yeah, i saw that she posted she didn't trust HR. Nobody trusts HR; you're right-they are there to protect the company. unfortunately they also hold the fmla papers she needed to cover her ass. that's why I advised her to ask for the paperwork and say absolutely nada else. Inquisitive, "helpful" HR person, "Oh, you need fmla papers? Is your child or you sick you poor thing?"
you answer, "May I have the FMLA papers please?" ad nauseum. Never answer those snakes. just take what you need and get out. EAP works for the company, too. You think they give a rat's ass whether you're about to pop yourself out of existence? Nope, they're there to make sure you don't hurt the company.
I'm well aware of these corporate games and "helplines" all one big fucking joke.
:eek: Stop that right this minute! You're a married man and father of daughters! :eek: :eek:
Oh, that's ok, monster. I'm pulling for you too! :D
Threw up my breakfast again yesterday.
Called school to explain. Called later in the day to check I could come in tomorrow (Thursday- today) and was told because I'd been sick I had to be off 48 hours.
I was seriously aggrieved.
I was off work most of December.
I did not need another two days off.
Throwing up in the mornings is liver related, you can't catch it.
But because I'm sober these days, less ashamed and more sensible, I called to speak to the Head today.
I was able to get a doctor's appointment at 09.00 tomorrow (Friday) because of a cancellation.
My H was very kind and reassuring. I was able to say that I'd been upset that I couldn't return to school, but I also voiced that I had no issues with him or the school. I know he has a job to do and he has been very good to me throughtout my troubles.
Apparently the right thing to do is call the school and simply say when I will be in. Any report of vomiting comes under official guidelines. He even said if it continued to be a probem they might consider changig my start time. I don't think it willcome to that as long as I keep it on the quiet.
So although this is in the Upset Thread it could just as well be in the Happy Thread. I work for good people and the only nagging fear is how much I have let them down.
Oh, Cherry Berry! I'm sorry this thing is taking you away from your beloved job/children. You're getting better, every day, you are, you ARE. blessings to you. At least they understand at school.
I spoke with anon and she is better, says she can feel you guys pulling for her and is getting some perspective. Her mail/house are being taken care of. She does not care to see anyone (I offered to bring her some real food) but she just wants to focus on herself and get better ASAP. She feels safe and is glad she is where she is.
She tells you all thank you.
Oh, Cherry Berry! I'm sorry this thing is taking you away from your beloved job/children. You're getting better, every day, you are, you ARE. blessings to you. At least they understand at school.
Amen to that!
I spoke with anon and she is better, says she can feel you guys pulling for her and is getting some perspective. Her mail/house are being taken care of. She does not care to see anyone (I offered to bring her some real food) but she just wants to focus on herself and get better ASAP. She feels safe and is glad she is where she is.
She tells you all thank you.
Amen to that too! So, SO glad she is in a safe place.
You're a kind lady, Tril x
Glad to hear she's feeling safe and is getting the help she needs. And thanks for the updates Tril.
@ Sundae: remember everything you have said to others about alcohol dependency being an illness. You haven't let the school down. You have experienced a period of ill health, including the various symptoms associated with alcohol dependency.
... including the various symptoms associated with recovering from / ending alcohol dependency.
Went to the docs today.
She said the threaded veins (spots) on my chest and back and arms won't go away. Not ever not never. So I'm stuck with them. No more cleavage showage.
She gave me a prescription for my morning nausea. Not a cure - she says my body has gone through a long period of stress and this is simply something to help it cope. Take every morning and there should be no more vomiting.
She was surprised and confused that I hadn't had a liver scan. You know, Tril has been on at me since last year to ask for more help - turns out she's right (the GP is one of the senior partners, it's Hobson's Choice who you get to see). So I will get a letter for a hospital appointment for that. She also wants me to have another blood test asap to make sure all is well. Turns out my liver damage is actually very slight. But she's concerned about some of the other symptoms. Being teetotal is never a bad move, liver-wise, but there may be more going on. Nice.
Oh and when I got down to Reception and asked for a blood test the earliest they could give me was in a fortnight. Not next Friday, the Friday after. So let's hope it's nothing serious, eh?
ETA thanks for the encouraging words peeps.
I do take them on board.
Glad you got someone who took a closer look. Two weeks to get lab work done! Sounds like Ontario (actually you could probably get the blood drawn promptly, but getting the result would take a month). Good luck, hope the news is good ...
I suspect there's a bit of a peak of bloodtests going on this time of year. GPs tend to be very busy during the colder months generally too.
Glad to hear the liver damage isn't as bad as you thought. Maybe the other thing going on is a persistent infection? The antibiotics might not have fully cleared it the first time.
Anyways, at least now you're seeing a decent doctor who is taking appropriate medical steps to figure out what, why and how to treat. That's definitely good news.
Also, haven't tried myself (though intend to at some point) but bio-oil might help reduce the apperance of threadveins. Anecdotally it seems to have some good effect. But, it was designed for scar healing, so there's no real data on its effect on thread veins.
Hope they can help you get sorted out, Sundae. Best wishes, as always.
Sundae,
I have had good results with topical witch hazel and oral horse chestnut and or bilberry caps.
Sundae-I have those veins on my face (chin and under left eye) and they're from alcohol. They CAN be injected with saline (i think?) and they will go away but it's purely cosmetic and costs major bucks. Alcohol goes to the surface (that's why it appears to 'warm you up' when you're cold) and takes the blood with it - do it enough and those little capillaries burst. That's what we've got. Sun damage will do it, too.
Honey, if you were my patient (even though I only play doctor) you'dve had an ultrasound (is there a stone in your biliary duct?) a CT and then we'd go from there to see if we needed to do an MRI. Two weeks to get your blood drawn? Holy shit. I"m sorry, Mother England, but that's just WRONG. You could be hit by a bus in two weeks, ya know?
What is the anti-nausea drug called?
At any rate----I'm glad your liver is not as bad as first thought. but now am worried for other things. Don't you dare drink, Sundae. I won't either. At least not until next time....sigh.....
Glad to hear the liver damage isn't as bad as you thought. Maybe the other thing going on is a persistent infection? The antibiotics might not have fully cleared it the first time.
I was thinking pancreatitis. I'm sorry honey, but that's what I was thinking.
It's okay though as it can be managed quite nicely----and it probably isn't because pancreatitis gives you wicked, wicked belly pain.
Maybe it's just really horrid gastritis.
You need a scope done, too. Down the throat one. sorry, but I need you to be well.
Well I did have extraordinary constipation where I couldn't even stand up straight.
But that was below the belt.
Can't remember if I posted it, but that Doc really pissed me off by telling me it couldn't be my liver because of where the pain was. Ahem - I never said my liver was painful, I was only trying to alert you to an existing medical problem. Just because I didn't study to be a Doctor does NOT mean I think my liver is in my lower intesting. Prick.
He's one of the ones that didn't think I needed a liver scan. Prick-plus.
Then again I shouldn't really be mean.
I told a girl to go in and press a wet towel against her leg after she fell over.
She was sent home from school after lunch.
Her Mum had to take her to the hospoital to get steri-stripped.
God I felt like a shit.
I forget name of drug : Metoclopraide - 10mg
well, what were you supposed to do?
you don't have steri strips there at the school, right?
she wasn't bleeding to death.
It'll be okay.
I forget name of drug : Metoclopraide - 10mg
Ok. Over here that's called Reglan. Good drug for what ya gots.
Well our first aider also absolved me.
She said that it looked superficial and it was only the fact it kept bleeding, and bleeding and soaking down into her socks and bleeding that made them aware it wasn't your normal playground graze.
You get why I felt bad though.
Wow, over here you just take you doc referral into the pathology clinic and take a number. Normally the wait is less than an hour and usually no more than 15 minutes. Results in 2 or 3 days except things like hiv tests. They take a bit longer. All covered by medicare, so no up front charges.
We complain about our health system here too, but compared to most other countries, its not too bad.
Sunday, have they considered gall bladder issues?
Wow, over here you just take you doc referral into the pathology clinic and take a number. Normally the wait is less than an hour and usually no more than 15 minutes. Results in 2 or 3 days except things like hiv tests. They take a bit longer. All covered by medicare, so no up front charges.
We complain about our health system here too, but compared to most other countries, its not too bad.
Different areas are governed by different health authorities, and different clinics, GP consortiums etc have different provision arrangements.
At my surgery depending on the type of test needed, the GP may take the blood then and there, or you may be asked to see one of the practice nurses, or they make a referral for the local hospital path dept and you take your slip down any time you like during their opening hours. Sometimes you end up waiting an hour though if they're busy.
I've never had to wait to get in for a blood test I've only ever had to wait for results and that's usually 5-10 days. Similar arrangements for xrays: you get a referral and go down to the xray dept at the hospital anytime they're open.
Only nurses take blood here.
And you've all seen the results, right?
Cellar page
London and Leicester were the same (okay, Leicester was a qualified phlebotomist in a hospital, but again it was same day there.)
It's in and out with me. Even though I do have tricksy veins.
They're only taking a lickle bit after all - I used to be in Blood Donors for ages.
And the results are back in 48 hours.
It's the qappointment that takes the longest. I guess what I've written already says that. But it's worth mentioning again because I'm still a bit cross.
Oh and OMG. Speidi are still in CBB.
Ridiculous.
Ali are y'am okay?
Jim says it's hot as hell in Brissy, and they can smell a tinge of smoke when the wind is in the right direction.
I know you're not in danger, just wanted an opinion.
You're in the news here you know. The country I mean, not you, personally :)
You may be the other side of the world but there are many many links between us.
Ali are y'am okay?
.
Was that a brummie accent?
Yeah, we're good here Sundae. :) Sitting in the aircon at the moment. spent the morning down at the park with Max and Aden and Adens mate Quinn. They were selling mangoes (not very well) and we were just hanging out. It was lovely actually. Lucky we're by the water so there was a breeze, although still hot. Not so bad in the shade though.
Jim is probably getting the smoke residue from the Bribie fires last week. They were pretty bad, and we've had no rain, so there are so many particles in the air. We need a good storm to clean it really. Not sure when that'll happen though. It's incredibly dry for this time of year.
Must be global warming. ;)
Honey, if you were my patient (even though I only play doctor) you'dve had an ultrasound (is there a stone in your biliary duct?) a CT and then we'd go from there to see if we needed to do an MRI. Two weeks to get your blood drawn? Holy shit. I"m sorry, Mother England, but that's just WRONG. You could be hit by a bus in two weeks, ya know?
As opposed to here where the doctor can and will order an MRI, an MRA, and ustrasoound, a CT and a nerve-damage test while you're still exchanging pleasantaries, but then you wait weeks while you fight with some penpusher at the insurance company whose flowchart tells them it isn't medically necessary for you to get an x-ray of your suspected broken skull..... and then there's your co-pays and deductible which you are relieved to see come in under a grand.......
My husband's job just slowed down.. drastically. With me hurt and not working... I am beyond scared! I have no choice but to ask for help. If everyone who has a facebook account please "like" the Syntimates page, I would sure be grateful. It just takes the right person to see it, to start the ball rolling. I'm hoping to get enough "in stock" sales to get us through until I am able to work again.
I'm scared... if my un-employment benefits do not kick in soon, my morgage is in danger. I might have to try working, even though I can't even walk from the kitchen to the living room without severe pain in my hip. I already use a cane to relieve the pressure. BAH! My concern is even if I was to get a job tomorrow, by some miracle... it could take up to 3 weeks before I see my first pay. Thats 9 days too late for my morgage.
Apparently I don't have much choice, I know things will look up. I just need that to be, well lets see... yesterday :)
If this is violating any rules here, can I please have a mod remove my post. Thanks!
Jaydaan - Do you have any panda themed items? ;)
Sarge, I have a few... Panda or Pandaish Girls costumes, but they are all I can find. Two of them barely have black on them at all. Even the eyes are small black spots. These are one size womens... meaning SMALL/MEDIUM in normal sizes. These are about $75-100 The big full body one, with detachable head and all that, is more a mascot size/style. This comes in many sizes including men's and women's, but holy hell expensive!
I am still looking :)
Sarge:
[YOUTUBE]ASLuRyZjp7k[/YOUTUBE]
[YOUTUBE]v5iJPoIynm0[/YOUTUBE]
Sarge, I have a few... Panda or Pandaish Girls costumes, but they are all I can find. Two of them barely have black on them at all. Even the eyes are small black spots. These are one size womens... meaning SMALL/MEDIUM in normal sizes. These are about $75-100 The big full body one, with detachable head and all that, is more a mascot size/style. This comes in many sizes including men's and women's, but holy hell expensive!
I am still looking :)
I'm sorry, I was only kidding. There is an ongoing joke about me looking like a panda
I don't know what is upsetting me today, but I am seriously depressed this afternoon.
I'm into a bout of it as well. I know what I should oughta do but...
Sorry to hear that. :(
Sometimes winter, on top of everything else, is just too much. I think January vacations in warm, sunny climes should be a basic human right for everybody who lives in the cold and snow. Especially in the dreary northeast where we don't see the winter sun from one month to the next.
Seriously getting dressed seems like the biggest chore ....:neutral:
Seriously getting dressed seems like the biggest chore ....:neutral:
True. I'm still in sleep pants and a t-shirt
I just can't get started on work most days. End up just mooching about online not doing anything much. Can't seem to just start.
You know in Office Space how they have a case of the Mondays? I think we've all got a case of the Januarys...
My vision goes blurry after an hour or so of reading. It's not correcting itself ... and I have multiple hours of reading to do for the courses I just started. Can't focus properly on anything, near or far. Stupid chemo. :thepain:
Well it is "Blue Monday", the most depressing day of the year
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blue_Monday_(date)
You are correct -that is a no workie linkie.......
anyhoo, the gist is third monday in January is considered by many to be the most depressing day of the year. So we're all done with it already. hurrah! the only way is up. right? ....RIGHT?
Yeah...you know whats up though right? Smoke rises....I gonna stick around here at ground level..
You're lucky I tell you. Ground level? pure luxury............. yftm
Oh we used to dream of bein allowed to stay at ground level. We used to 'ave to 'over above the ground from sunup to sundown!
Feel a bit better about things today.
Found out the Occy Health appointment tomorrow is NOT a blood test - which worried me because of my lapse, but just a review. And the magical blood test I thought existed to say exactly what you've drank and when in the last 5 months is actually a liver function test, and mone have been coming down every time I've been tested, even when I was just cutting down, let alone going for weeks without a drink.
This suits me right now. I'll have more weeks of abstinence behind me when the nurse draws my blood on 01/02/13. Which is less about seeking approval and more about wanting to know I am not being missed by checks that have seemed cursory in the past. Even though I don't get my results until 06/02/13. With a different Doctor. Dr J is great but is on annual leave that week.
So I'm seeing Dr M and I'm not sure if I've seen he/ she before. I just know I don't want to see Dr M again. He's the one whtold me my extreme constipation could not be conneted to my liver issues because it was in my lower abdomen and the liver is not located there...
Dani, I know things are busy now. But flu season at my practice seems to last until summer holidays and then start again, with vaccinations thrown in somewhere along the line. And my tests are "routine". As have been things like Dad's scans. The NHS moves exceeding slow.
Apart from that, all is good apart from Mum being in a pissy mood because it's been snowy and icy. And of course she thinks she bears the brunt of everything that needs to be done outside the house now. Despite the fact she does not drive and refuses to walk anywhere. How can Dad be at fault for the fact that she agreed to houesit my bro's parent-in law's cat this week? Or that she would need to go to the solicitors in this weather? Oh actually the latter is his fault because he is the one who has Alzheimers. And she can't trust him to go to Tesco alone on Sundays in case he comes home with the wrong thing. Damn, I was hearing that when I was still married! Only now she can be nasty about it because there is a diagnosis.
I know what she is really expressing is her fear at losing the man she loves and the difficulty they will face in the future. But ignoring me because I had Friday afternoon and Monday off (schools closed - snow) isn't really going to change anything is it? Why did I mostly stay in bed? Because she was having a shit-fit. I just put my earplugs in, read Luck in the Shadows, cuddled Diz and hoped she didn't hit Dad in the mean time.
Anyway, Seb (counsellor) said today what everyone always says to me. Don't care so much. She doesn't understand and never will and I can't change that.
Well it is "Blue Monday", the most depressing day of the year
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blue_Monday_(date)
No.
When I read the "equation" I was sure it was meant to be tongue in cheek.
Oh we used to dream of bein allowed to stay at ground level. We used to 'ave to 'over above the ground from sunup to sundown!
Well, of course, we had it rough...
Feel a bit better about things today....
Good.
Anyway, Seb (counsellor) said today what everyone always says to me. Don't care so much. She doesn't understand and never will and I can't change that.
So when are you going to listen to us all, then, eh ;)
When Dani buys a mattress an posts her photos of Glasgow :lol:
:D
Sent by thought transference
Why doesn't Dani have a mattress? Did Carrot eat it up or does she, like the venerable Mulder, sleep only on the couch?
Dani sleeps on the floor. It's her SAS training.
Na-uh, I sleep upside down hanging from my feet like a bat
Na-uh, I sleep upside down hanging from my feet like a bat
Sorry if this is out of line, but what happens if a guy comes over for a romantic tryst? The hanging from the ceiling, how does that work?
Na-uh, I sleep upside down hanging from my feet like a bat
I should've figured that! ;)
Well, she used to squat, but it's become more of a slouch.
I am not kicking the fatigue between chemo sessions anymore. I have to sit on benches in the hospital halls and rest a couple times on my way in from the handicapped parking lot to my office each morning. But Employee Health gave me a hard time today about extending my handicapped parking sticker as written on the prescription from the cancer center - the dolly at the desk batted her fake eyelashes at me and said '30 days only!' and wrote Feb 26 on the form for the Parking office rather than the date my oncologist wrote. This in spite of the fact that I had a three-month sticker last October. And when I went up to the Parking office there was a tag lying on the clerk's desk written out for three months. When I asked about it, the clerk said 'that's different' because it's for a pregnant woman.
Last time I looked, pregnancy was not a disease. Yes, you can feel ill. Yes, you can have diseases within pregnancy, I know very well. But it was an insult in the context.
So I went to grand rounds and got a little heated during a discussion and came off sounding unprofessional, I think, and THAT upsets me very much.
I am SO frustrated. I'm happy my last chemo is next week, but I feel worse than I've ever felt and I can hardly walk from my office to the clinic, never mind a mile across the acres of parking lot to the residents' lot. Next session will knock me down more. I'm not going to be 'better' by Feb. 26. I was depressed last week and frankly nothing has really changed. This stupid disease is NOT an 'opportunity', nor is it a 'gift', nor is it anything but a huge negative smoking hole in what was supposed to be my new life. And a huge dark cloud in my future, forever. So the dolly with the fake eyelashes was sort of the last straw today.
Sorry.
Fuck her. Bummer. And FUCK CANCER while we're at it.
Sent by thought transference
Do you have a colleague who might go get your car for you ortho? As in, walk to it and bring it to you so you don't have to walk? Always remember to ask for help when you need. Most people I've ever met are always very happy to help when asked. Maybe they don't realise how bad things are for you if you're trying to put on a brave face.
I am trying to do everything I need to do at work and not let anything suggest that I can't do my job ... haven't asked for help so far, although I missed a good deal of time last fall while in hyperbaric therapy after surgery. It's very important to me to show that I can do this job. If I can't fulfill all the requirements I can't stay in the residency.
My co-workers are kind and helpful. But to ask someone to walk ten minutes across two major buildings and then another half-mile or more across parking lots to bring me my car feels like a lot, especially when we don't all leave at the same time - I'd be asking someone to interrupt his or her work and take about twenty minutes to do me a favor every day. I may not have a choice after my next treatment, though. I'm getting maxxed out physically.
Dear orthodoc
I'm not the boss of you but were I in that position I would not waste one (of my precious) breath(s) on Lil miss eyelashes (though I would definitely be aggravated by her). I'd take my pass and park wherever the FUCK I wanted to. Make the parking cop do the dirty work. Make the parking vendor make the case. Basically ignore their ignorant asses. Use your limited strength to do stuff important to you, like getting to your business. At worst, let the fines, should there actually be any, accumulate until you're better able to make your case. Worst case you have to pay a little money. Likely they'll dismiss all of it when you show your doctor's note compared to Lil miss eyelashes' petty executive tyranny.
Fuck them. Park where you are entitled to park based on facts not based on some dumbass.
I am not kicking the fatigue between chemo sessions anymore.
I'm not a doctor, nor have I played one on TV (although I've played doctor, but that another matter. :blush:
But reading first person accounts, and seeing dramatizations in TV/movies, I'm under the impression that residency is kind of like doing a triathlon, with a broken leg, every fucking day, for months on end.
If that's even close to the truth, doing it on chemo, is insane.
Big V's right, don't let your Canuck manners get in the way.
Grab the bitch by the throat and tell her, "Parking pass or I'll put ice spikes on my Harley and ride it up your face."
You can add please if it's absolutely necessary.
Oh and pics please. ;)
Okay, I admit that my residency is probably unique. If I were doing, say, surgery, you're right - I simply couldn't manage the hours and physical requirements. Right now I do three clinics per week and have six grad courses per semester. I'll have to make up 14 clinics in May (because of missing time last fall) and I'll have a couple short, intensive courses in June. But I don't work 36 hours at a time like I did in the '80s.
Even with what could be regarded as the easiest of residencies, I'm maxed out and I do have to make up lost time and not wimp out in clinic. I worry about having another big complication. I won't qualify for FMLA until July. I know my residency director, who is a great guy, would do everything possible to help if I were to end up with another crisis (I have another surgery in May so more complications are possible). However, his hands are tied beyond a certain point by the national post-grad training accreditation body. I just feel that I have to push on, but no, I am not super-doctor!!
Unfortunately the parking nazis here don't issue fines, they tow. I can't face coming out at the end of the day and having my car just not be there, and having to go get it from wherever.
I think I'll have a word with the head of Employee Health, though. If that goes nowhere I can always make a formal complaint to the hospital, when I dredge up the energy.
Any way you can get a hoverround or scooter one that you can manage to put in your car?
My daughter just called to say she's dropping out of college in the middle of her junior year. She feels she can't do a couple of the mandatory courses but hasn't talked to her academic advisor. There happens to be a boyfriend who has not gone to college and who has expressed his opinion (last fall) that a degree isn't needed. He thinks he can make money with a 'Ghostbusters' company - a paranormal investigation company. Really.
My daughter was home for more than a month, just went back to school - and in all that time didn't talk to me or to her father about any of this. She thinks she's going to pay for her apartment and make ends meet while working at Walmart and a local stable. She has no job at the moment. Stable owners pay their help in lessons, hardly ever in cash.
I know it's her life. But oh. my. god.
I can't bear it.
You might want to slip in a couple remarks so you can give her an 'I told you so', later. :haha:
Show her the new Hispanic college commercial where the Mom is telling the son he is going to college and he disagrees and the film changes showing his life with a college degree and his life without.
I just logged on to her student page, where I used to pay her tuition; I didn't do that last fall, being otherwise occupied and my ex being responsible for tuition payment etc. She hasn't registered for any spring classes. There are no charges to pay because she has no classes. (There had been some worry about her qualifying for in-state tuition rates now that she's been there a year. She told me and my ex in December that she'd inquired, submitted paperwork, etc. She told both of us tonight via text that she was granted in-state status, but that makes no sense, with her not being registered.)
Her grades from last fall were fine, a small drop but still perfectly respectable.
She told me tonight that she went to classes this week. She told me during her winter break what classes she was taking this spring. Meanwhile, she had already chosen not to register for spring classes last November. The decision was made then.
I just can't believe it. She lied to me for over a month while home. She had lots of private time with me, she could have brought all this up. Instead we talked about how we were going to both graduate in May of 2014, how we'd be traveling between schools, what a big celebration we would have. She lied through our entire conversation tonight, as far as her status with the university goes. I am just ... stunned. My heart is breaking.
Maybe she just didn't want to drop anything else on you? Maybe she preferred to engage in the 'we'll both graduate together' dream with you rather than burst the bubble now, whilst you've so much other shit to deal with?
Oh Ortho! I really don't know what to say. Perhaps Dani is right, though ... she just didn't know how to handle it with you in person when you've got so much on your plate now, and chickened out? I am sorry you're really going through it right now!
ugh. Ortho-I'm so sorry about this. If it helps at all, my older boy did a similar thing-he got a scholarship to Toledo and bolted after two weeks (hated toledo) then went to an uber expensive private college (Walsh-Catholic college in Canton, oh) THEN took a year off completely to live in the slums of Columbus while becoming a personal trainer. took the whole year off. He learned he couldn't make it; didn't like living in the slums and the next summer he was at Ohio State and he'll graduate in the Spring 2013. His father was crushed when he blew the scholarship off (it was a football one, not academic) but the kid had to do what he had to do. My heart goes out to you, but she's going to have to learn her own way; just like we all do. :flower:
a year or so of Ramen noodles and sketchy neighbors will change her mind.
I'm sorry ortho kids can fill or break our hearts so easily. At some point they all have to make their own mistakes, we just have to carry the hope that they will recover from them.
Sorry ortho. Hope she comes clean about the lies -- the dropout is hard enough for you as a parent, but I'm sure her deceit hurts at a different level. :(
Oh Ortho, that is heartbreaking. Maybe she did feel the pressure of wanting to please you or not feeling that she'd be heard if she were to tell you the truth or maybe she knows in her heart of hearts that this boyfriend is bad news and she is fucking up her life but doesn't want to admit that to herself by admitting it to you.
Sounds like he may not be the best influence on her and the real issue here seems not to be college or even her lying to you, which are frustrating and heartbreaking, respectively, but that she seems to be abdicating her self authority to someone else.
I'm so sorry you had to find out this way. Maybe rather than confronting her she needs re-assurance from you that you love her whatever her, and you can decide if you want to call them stupid, choices she makes.
Seems like insecurity and or fear of what your response will be. But Ramen noodles and Walmart will either straighten her out or not.
Other questions, reefer? drugs? drinking? boyfriend?
He learned he couldn't make it; didn't like living in the slums and the next summer he was at Ohio State and he'll graduate in the Spring 2013.
I read Columbus as Columbia and thought, "Well at least he learned a life lesson!"
Looks like he did anyway, just closer to home.
The deceit is really hard to cope with. I understand her feeling constrained about talking it out last fall - she was to register for spring courses in October and that's when I started chemo. But to be home for a month in Dec. - Jan. and have all that time together, just us ... we've always been close, I always thought she could talk to me. The fact that she lied during our actual conversation last night (she doesn't know yet that I know she didn't register for the spring; she presented it that she went to classes last week and is now 'seeing the need' to take a year off) just floors me.
She is a pleaser; she is avoidant in her style of handling confrontation; she also has a history of going along with boyfriends and not acknowledging to us or to herself that the bf is running the show. She got out of a relationship with a VERY controlling bf last summer and fell straight into her current relationship. This one has all sorts of red flags (too intense too soon, bf declaring undying love within days of beginning to go out, her changing major interests and activities to line up with his, etc.).
The real issue - you nailed it, foot - she IS abdicating her life, her decisions, her responsibilities, her autonomy, to someone else. Again. THAT is what's breaking my heart and filling me with dread. She doesn't seem to have a sense of self - she talks a good talk at times, but what she actually does isn't consistent with the talk. I'm so fearful for her, going forward, letting her life be dictated by whatever abusive/controlling male is in her life at any given time. I wanted so much better for her. I hope there's still a possibility she'll break this pattern.
Meanwhile, it's Ramen noodles and Walmart. She hasn't done the math, I could tell last night - she hasn't begun to realize how her life is going to change. She thinks she's going to relax, earn some money, save some money, get all happy and ready to go back at some point ... whereas, on a Walmart wage, she won't quite meet basic expenses, no money for clothes, certainly nothing to save, no emergency fund should the car need repairs, nothing to pay car insurance with ... reality is going to hit hard. I hate to see it happen but it has to.
I did reassure her last night that I love her unconditionally - no matter what she chooses in her life, no matter what happens, I love her. I do. I would never 'not want to see her anymore', which she expressed as a fear. (I do NOT want to see the boyfriend, who is supposed to visit in March, but that's another issue.) I told her that I'll always be there for her; I want good things for her, want her to have a good life, but it's not up to me to dictate what she does or how she gets there. But I'm here for support and advice.
Still, the lying hurts a lot. I feel like I can never believe her again.
...she IS abdicating her life, her decisions, her responsibilities, her autonomy, to someone else.
Chip off the old block. :eyebrow:
I guess I deserve that. Just more way I've screwed up in my adult life and hurt my kids.
The real issue - you nailed it, foot - she IS abdicating her life, her decisions, her responsibilities, her autonomy, to someone else. Again. THAT is what's breaking my heart and filling me with dread. She doesn't seem to have a sense of self - she talks a good talk at times, but what she actually does isn't consistent with the talk. I'm so fearful for her, going forward, letting her life be dictated by whatever abusive/controlling male is in her life at any given time. I wanted so much better for her. I hope there's still a possibility she'll break this pattern.
What is her opinion on your ex-husband? I think I remember you saying that some of the kids were on your side, and some weren't. Because she is
clearly fulfilling a pattern of dating people like her dad. Perhaps it might be useful to bring up the idea that we all tend to marry our parents if we're not careful, and let her examine for herself whether this boyfriend is like her dad (assuming she doesn't worship him, if she does it's probably not very helpful.)
A side note to consider, did she just drop off the college's radar, or officially withdraw? If you file the withdrawal paperwork, there's no hard feelings and you can come back as necessary. If you just disappear, that goes on your record and will be on there if she tries to transfer those credits anywhere else in the future. I think most places will let you skip one semester without penalty, but she really, really should officially withdraw if that's going to be her choice.
Yes, this is the outcome I've feared, one more way I've screwed up in my adult life.
No, it's how you were screwed over in your adult life. You make it sound like you were in charge of your adult life, when clearly you were not. Any mistakes you may have made were in the choices between two or more undesirable options.
Looks to me like she's intentionally putting herself in a situation where she will no longer have choices, and can abdicate responsibility for what happens from here on in.
I wonder if she's pregnant.
@ preggers, EEEEK!
Ortho, How about the two of you getting into counseling together? Too close?
Now that Bruce has brought it up... as I didn't want to go there, you may want to continue to pay for one thing in her life while she's out of school, birth control.
You did all the right things O, your daughter made it to the age of 20 and now she has to fly on her own. She is an adult although it is my true belief that some do not get a full brain until they are 25. It must be hard to let go. :neutral:
And at that, the part of the brain that develops latest is the part that deals with a sense of consequence and impulse control
I have considered whether she may be pregnant. She has a pretty good form of birth control, unless she had it removed. She was home long enough at winter break for a pregnancy to become obvious, if her decision not to register for spring classes back in October was related to that. So - not likely, not right now. I don't discount the probability within the next year. :(
Clod, that's a great suggestion re checking if she formally withdrew or took a leave from the university. I'll check with her. She isn't registered for any classes right now so there's nothing left hanging, so to speak, but she may need to make a formal declaration of taking a leave. As for her relations with her dad, she seems to enjoy spending time with him, and he's made great efforts in the past year to be more involved, supportive, and to just spend 'fun' time with her. She doesn't idolize him. But I can see her unconsciously gravitating to controlling males.
Foot, I'd go to counseling with her but I doubt she'd be open to that right now ... plus she's a three-hour plane ride away. I have urged and all but begged her to get into counseling for herself.
About the dishonesty part of it. I wouldn't take it too personally if I were you. No matter how old you are, you more than likely don't want to make a choice that you know will upset or disappoint your parents, and it's only as you get quite a bit older that you figure out that you can make these choices and explain your reasoning to your parents and then move on. Of course the issue of tuition changes things somewhat and i can see why you'd be annoyed that she didn't talk to you about it. Have you considered that maybe she just didn't want to worry you about it all when she could most likely clearly see that you were not coping so well with your own stresses without her adding hers?
I know it's hard to see your kids make what, in your own opinion, is a bad decision, but in the end, she has to make her own choices and live or die by them on her own.
I think we all as parents these days probably take too much control of our kids lives for too long. I say this because we, as the older generation/s sit around bitching about how inept the youth of today are, but we're the ones responsible because we've done way too much hand holding for way too long in a lot of cases.
She'll be ok ortho. Even if she takes a semester or two off, she'll be ok.
On that note...
http://alameda.patch.com/blog_posts/please-dont-help-my-kids
(Originally brought to my attention by xoxoxoBruce, credit where credit is due.)
You know, I have never been a helicopter parent. I grew up with a lot of freedom even for the '60s and '70s and I've been on my own since I was 17. By that I mean supporting myself financially and figuring out that paying the rent in a given month meant I wasn't going to eat for the last three days of the month. Not 'on my own' as in living in a paid-for dorm room and having fun money to spend on pot and parties. My money was spent on eggs. I was not sheltered and I haven't sheltered my kids.
I am distressed that my daughter has made a decision that's going to make life tough for her. But that's her decision. I haven't said I'm going to send her money so she can be sheltered from the reality of life on a wage of $8/hour. I am distressed that she has comprehensively lied to me for months, while accepting gifts and as many enjoyable outings and excursions as could be fit into the holidays. That she spent a week entirely alone with me and never brought up her decision to change direction. Most of all, that she is leaving school to continue her life with a weird, red-flag 25 year old who dresses in wrestling costumes, pretends to have a Ghostbusters company, makes scary postings on his facebook page about burning and death, and has no discernible income.
I have not held my kids' hands. They all did their own laundry from the age of ten or twelve; they all learned to cook; they all learned to clean a house properly; they never had car privileges without commensurate responsibilities. They all had one shot at higher education (paid for, because my ex's income precluded the possibility of loans); deciding to ditch that, as my second son did, meant any further education was on their own dime. They all were expected to have jobs and save money for the things they wanted.
My daughter WILL live or die by her choices. But you know what? She might just die; don't be so nonchalant with the phrase. She has a red-flag boyfriend who is assiduously isolating her from family and now from her schooling. Things don't have to go well. She does NOT have to be ok. Let me repeat that. She does NOT have to be ok. Life does not always go well. Young women get murdered by abusive, controlling boyfriends. Young people end up on the streets and in lives of hell. Young people disappear, never to be found.
I've seen it all my life, in my profession. Things do NOT have to be okay. Life does not have to go well. I know this, and my ex knows this, very well. So pardon me if I'm distressed right now. There's more at stake than a small child climbing the ladder at a playground. All I can do is sit back, assure my daughter that I'm here in the background and she can always contact me, and hope she will be okay. But there is no guarantee.
I get your situation because my sister just did all of this with my niece. She got pregnant lived with him had a baby then married the asshole and was married less time than Kim Kardashian. My sister called me several times a week with some new drama in that relationship and I know she wanted to shut her door on several occasions. I told her I thought it was a mistake not to let her know she always has a place to go should she need to get away from that life.
You get along with your daughter and the right thing is to always keep the door [dialog] open. You are a good mom.
Ach, Ortho, y'know I put my mum through pretty much the same shit when I was 18. He was a red flag boyfriend and I was throwing away a place at a prestigious university to go live in a bedsit (one room flatlet) with him and work in a plastics factory.
The only thing you can do is make sure those conduits for communication and emotional support remain open. For all the lessons she has inadvertently acquired about relationships and controlling men, there will have been other lessons in survival and self preservation.
Ortho please try not to catastrophize so much. You dont know the future, but you do know that you provided your daughter with a well-adjusted childhood, right? She didnt come from a poverty-stricken, drug addicted family where she didnt learn the basics for good judgment and decision-making. Right?
orthodoc-we are here for you.
she WILL figure it out---probably sooner rather than later.
I understand that I may appear to be catastrophizing, but I have reasons to dread what may be in store. For one, my profession is one that shows me how often things really do turn out catastrophically. It's a bit like being a cop. You see how badly things can go.
Secondly, my daughter had a difficult childhood. One of her brothers (my second son) had a diagnosis of early-onset bipolar disorder among other things, and was very violent throughout his childhood and teen years. He was admitted to hospital twice for trying to kill his younger brother. We had in-home help through the Wraparound program in our area but couldn't keep workers, because they couldn't handle my son. I looked into, but could not afford residential treatment. Our home was chaotic and violent and my daughter did not necessarily learn the basics of good decision-making; she learned to escape, avoid, and appease. This may sound unbelievable, but help is just not always available no matter what people think, and many, many families live with violent children where everyone is in perpetual fear and uncertainty.
So, no. My daughter emphatically did not have a 'well-adjusted' childhood, for many reasons. There are others that I prefer not to get into. Trauma doesn't come only from poverty or drug addiction. I fear for her because I don't think she has the tools to help her make sound, self-protective decisions at the moment.
Im so sorry.
But she does have you. And you are smart, tough and strong. That means a lot.
Painfull as it may be you have to sit back and let them slam into that brick wall called reality every now and then ,
they will learn , a few Bloody noses are generally involved but they will learn
A few bloody noses I can understand. Been there done that. It's a little more than that that I'm worried about, plus ... it doesn't matter. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. If it kills you, it's someone else's worry.
Like sexobon said: life is hard, then you die.
I understand that I may appear to be catastrophizing, but I have reasons to dread what may be in store. For one, my profession is one that shows me how often things really do turn out catastrophically. It's a bit like being a cop. You see how badly things can go.
Anyone with a shred empathy ticks off the possible pitfalls, in their mind, when a friend/loved one appears to be fucking up. Hell, we do it watching people on the news or the silver screen.
Mostly there's not much we can do except bite our nails and watch it play out... unless we(or an employee), are willing to capture the(red) flag.
Red flags can be hard to capture ... but trust me. If it's possible, I will. I have skills of my own.
Ortho, would you like us (the cellar) to have a word with her?
;)
I wish ... unfortunately, I think this is something she has to figure out on her own.
This was my mass family emailing sent by my niece today... she is about the same age as your daughter..
I'm tired of hiding who I really am. I have a huge heart for people, whether they deserve it or not. I'd give the shirt off my back to help someone in need. I'd help a stranger. I'd even help someone who's done me wrong. That's just who I am. People just need to take me as I am or not. It ultimately is MY life. I will live it how I want...
I would have to be a moron not to know she is talking about her soon to be ex hub. Pretty sure this was directed to her parents but she likes to include us all. ;)
I pray she is not going back to this [ex?]meth head adulterer.
I told her helping someone, even someone who did you wrong is ok but being a doormat is not. I hope you can tell the difference. You are worth more than a place that someone wipes their feet.
Hope she remembers to help herself, Nirvana.
Meth head adulterer is a nice resume'. Good advice, hope she can hear it.
Orthodocette ... you want a 20% increase on earnings, lifelong, or not?
Niecevana ... enabling exploiters does not help them. Not really.
I blame Twilight for romanticising abusive relationships to vulnerable teenage girls.
I blame Twilight for romanticising abusive relationships to vulnerable teenage girls.
I blame the entire history of the world.
and how cool boys look in black leather jackets.
These
douches in Mali are blaming history and pissing me off today.
These douches in Mali are blaming history and pissing me off today.
that is sickening.
what is WRONG with these people??
I think I need a new definition of human being. There are a lot of creatures in this world that I'd rank higher.
Absolutely sickening. The Islamist version of Fahrenheit 451.
They were slowly digitizing that collection. We've all been stolen from.
Aww, man. That ain't right. :(
I think I need a new definition of human being. There are a lot of creatures in this world that I'd rank higher.
I live in a rural area and when I venture out I cannot go to the grocery store gas station or anywhere without seeing someone who is on meth or shows the physical signs of meth addiction. Me personally, I cannot think how anyone would find the ghoul -look attractive. I know my niece does not do that stuff it really radically changes your appearance and that has not happened with her and she has had the same job for years, they drug test. I don't get her attraction to someone who looks like an extra from a Hollywood zombie movie!! Even if he claims he is off the drugs, he looks like an addict. :neutral:
Well...I think it's the brokenness that attracts. And the unpredictability and danger.
I notice there's a film just coming out now that does for the zombie what Twiglet did for wampyres: Warm Bodies.
It's a romantic comedy, so not quite the same as Twiglet, I think it's taking the Michael out of that whole genre a little. But...he's a very pretty ghoul nonetheless.
Re: lost books
Very upsetting. The selfishness of those who do that is staggering. They steal not just from the world but from the future too. Fucks. Utter fucks. Them and all their ilk throughout history.
Honestly Dani I would rather do the girl ;)
Honestly Dani I would rather do the girl ;)
Ha! Yeah, he does nothing for me, but then I am not the target market :P
These douches in Mali are blaming history and pissing me off today.
So much for Muslim scholarship.
Just about everything worrying at me since I got home.
Mum back in Ignore mode, though I'm not really sure why, but as she's shouting at Dad it's probably something he did, not me. I've been blamelessly working after school, going to an Occucational Health meeting and to counselling.
A loan I thought I could make a few deferrels on is due in full on Thursday instead. Taken out when I was confident of my monthly income. Having been signed off work for nearly a month in Dec/ Jan I have no idea what I will be paid. Hairy times.
Been really snacky tonight (possibly in consequence?) which makes me feel fat even though over the course of the week I'm sure it's negligible. And it's all been healthy anyway. Just guilt-attack I think.
And not much more really, just general grumps added to having horrible dreams all this week - mostly about money, alcohol and family issues - no idea where they come from?! From my Mum telling me my Dad is not my natural father to my sister reporting me to the Police about backstreet abortions and defecating in the alley behind her house.
I feel as if I am missing some layers of skin this week.
All out of control. Even though I have been much further and much deeper before and barely cared.
casual friend of mine killed herself over the weekend leaving four young children (she was 37) and a friend of Bill W's.
I'm very sad over this. Every time I go to a meeting I hear stories like this. Depresses the hell out of me. Just lost two to pancreatic cancer not too long ago and they'd been sober for years and years.
this thread and 3 more inches of rain is depressing the crap out of me...:(
All out of control. Even though I have been much further and much deeper before and barely cared.
I think it's a good sign. Your brain is resetting what it means to be uncertain and/or out of control. I believe nightmares are a process of our subconscious working things out, rather than sinking farther into them. That's what I tell myself when I have them, anyway. :)
Tril, I'm so sorry about your friend. I hope those kids do okay, and that the dad stays a solid friend of Bill W.
Sundae--try not to sweat the dreams too much, though I hear you: they're disturbing.
It might be the alcohol (lack of) and your brain re-setting itself.
I don't know if it's upsetting me or pissing me off, but Eva is teething, so she's not eating/drinking properly, which of course leads to not sleeping properly, which means neither am I. Dazza is away (although he gets home tonight) and things have been a bit difficult with the no power situation and the wild weather over the weekend.
All in all, I could flatten the next person who irritates me even fractionally. I'm just itching for an excuse to blow my top. :mad:
I love that story. :)
Now I'm crying for her instead of me.
I guess life isn't that bad really. I even have aircon now the power is back.
[COLOR="LemonChiffon"]Oh thank god, [/COLOR]that was a *tense* ten minutes!
Excellent story, Zen. :thumb:
from my QI book that Sundae gave me as a present: all the breeds of poisonous snakes in the world live in Australia.
YIKES!
Some of them live in africa. Cobras, black mambas etc. I wouldn't want to tangle with either of them.
Yeah ... I know snakes are necessary to certain ecosystems (I think), but I prefer them to stay far from me. All kinds. :worried:
The Drover's Wife is an Australian classic.
I'm now wondering about rewriting it as The FIFO's de facto.
Bloke is off at a remote mining job. Sheila is in Perth, and due to a storm, the power goes out, so she's unable to access FB, skype or even a YouTube video of how to survive without the internet...
In other news--
My aunt is in the hospital. I am taking my mom to go see her. This is a *serious trip*. She's sedated to stop the seizures enough to get the medicine in her. She's on a respirator. My uncle called me this morning to tell me she's in the hospital. It's the latest trip of many after a fall where she smacked her head. The swelling did not respond to moderate interventions, so two weeks ago she had major brain surgery. She'd been home a week, today, when she started seizing again.
My mom had a major stroke in 1997 and traveling with her is an ordeal. Having her only sister dying in the hospital will make the traveling seem like an insignificant distraction. I don't know how long I'll be gone. I need to get all this shit together then call my uncle with the details of our itinerary.
I feel powerless to help, immersed in busy work, unable to relieve any of the anguish they're suffering. Now to my list. :cry:
Sorry to hear this, V. But you are helping. It's a terrible situation and you're doing all you can. Best wishes and support to you and your family.
Right, handing the logistics is a huge help to all of them.
Brianna crying down the phone.
Totally understandable and I wanted her to let it out.
But so sad to hear.
I'm not doing very well today. I feel so much is hanging over my head. In my immediate environment I see happy, teamy, confident people. I sit here feeling 3 inches tall. Ugly. Fat. Incompetent. Stupid.
I am trying everything, and nothing is helping. I am in no danger of a meltdown. It's just that I see no point in any of this (even though I am still working on 4 things at once. I listen to the young and malleable with their limited responsibilities talking and laughing and occasionally 'working together' on something: perfecting things so they think, because that's the kind of time they have. On jobs that, for the most part, anyone could do.)
I don't think I'm relapsing but it's going to be a very long afternoon. Whatever happens I wish it would just happen. Because I'm dwelling and it hurts. And I'm angry again, and that hurts. And I feel worthless, and that hurts.
The look on 'her' face yesterday was one of incredulous disgust. Never in any job have I been looked at like that. It makes me disgusted with myself. No, don't let her rent space: but you know some people are very very good at intimidation, especially the sneaky kind where no recourse is to be found.
Here I sit, disgusting and worthless. It seems as real as not long ago when I said I will be OK, and that I have worth. It's not easily shakeable. I'm trying, though.
Sorry to hear that you're feeling down.
You know you're not disgusting or worthless. Try not to let thoughts like that into your head. They are false.
What, in this moment, is lacking?
So, anonymous. Use your escape plan. Pre-empt them. Leave.
You are not disgusting and worthless. Re-read those positive posts of yours and get your thoughts back on the true track, that you are clever and worth far better than that silly tart with the incredulous scared smirk on her face ... she knows she's the one who's worthless ....
As my friend tells me, "What other people think of me is none of my business."
As my friend tells me, "What other people think of me is none of my business."
Well put.
Just as the flower is a plant becoming conscious of itself you are part of the universe becoming conscious of itself. YOU are IMPORTANT. My heart breaks for you b/c I know you are wise (which, in my book, is better than intelligent, but you are that, too) and kind and funny but you are hurting.
I could suggest poems or literature but I will just propose this: You are more than you know and stronger than you seem and other people have to live in their own heads---she's probably a cunting bitch who can shake it because her essence is evil. I know that sounds extreme but there ARE evil people among us and they shoot rays out everywhere----UT might call them stupid; I call them evil b/c they fuck up the world. If they only fucked up their OWN world that would be fine----but they fuck up OTHER people's worlds and they don't care. Psychokillers. I wish I were a true believer, but I think too much shite is random. In that one prayer they say "Lord, lead me not into temptation..." why would a loving Lord LEAD someone astray? Test his faith (Job) fuck with him like a toy for a one dollar bet with Satan? I don't believe that.
the kingdom of heaven is within us. One guru said, "You want to know the secret of my happiness? I don't mind what happens."
Thanks everyone. You help so much. I am better now. I keep trying as hard as i can and doing the best work i can. Not much more to be done, as I've made it perfectly clear how i feel and what i know about the issues.
So i have that: i'm honest and human and i'm no robot or servent I can live with that.
So I have that: there won't be any money, but when I die, on my deathbed, I will receive total consciousness. So I got that goin' for me, which is nice.
My freaking brain does not work. Chemo has eaten it. :thepain: :confused: :dunce:
Please may I have another?
My freaking brain does not work. Chemo has eaten it. :thepain: :confused: :dunce:
Please may I have another?
You need to learn to take better care of your things. How long have you had that brain, 29 years? And look at it. Do you think brains grow on trees? When I was a kid we didn't get a brain until we were 7, and then we had to share it. I think I didn't get my very own brain until I was 26 or something. Even then, my girlfriend did all the deciding for me, I rarely got to use it.
use it or lose it, or so I've heard.
I use it, but I keep losing it. Careless, I know. I blame it on the mustard gas. I really need to stay off that stuff.
So, no dice even with a pretty please, foot? But I'd take good care of it this time ... none of that wacky yewbaccy, I promise.
wacky yewbaccy. Your sense of humor is intact.
That's more than a lot of people have going for them.
Give yourself time and prioritize what you want to remember and what to forget. You've got to free up space on your hard drive and trim your RAM usage. Think Mac classic for a while.
That's me, a cute little Mac classic ... although my RAM will choke and die when I have to put together my PowerPoint presentations with streaming audio and upload them to the online learning site.
I'm gonna free up space on this hard drive, though, starting with my daughter's booked flights (3 trips) home this spring. Rebooking on Southwest has no change fees, but all the fares have gone up. To keep anywhere close to what I paid originally she has to be picked up/dropped off at the airport in the middle of the night, a 2-hour drive each way. Every time I rebook (because she doesn't know yet when she'll come, she just isn't coming this weekend) it'll cost more. I found this out last night, taking time from studying to pore over flights through Sept and coming up with nothing.
So I've decided to stop agonizing over it and throwing good money after bad. She will miss her flights and lose the money this month and next. We'll see about April. If she wants the April trip changed she can pay the difference. Otherwise these $400 flights will end up costing $600 or more each. She can save toward her airfare when she wants to travel.
There! That was easy. Eat the loss, why should I mind losing that much money, right? If I've watched my budget and carefully put aside funds so I could help her while I eat rice and beans, well, I can afford it, right? It's just one more way she's picked my pocket this winter (she asked me to book the flights after she'd decided not to re-enroll, saying she needed to come home more often during the semester - I think she just wanted some plane tickets available for use whenever, once the sh*t hit the fan).
Hard drive clean(er) and re-organized.
Shit Monster, I'm sorry.
Orhto, good for you.
What is upsetting me? All that money for health care and it doesn't seem like it helps anyone. Go see a Dr REALLY? :neutral:
What is upsetting me? All that money for health care and it doesn't seem like it helps anyone. Go see a Dr REALLY? :neutral:
Amen. The only doctor's who help you out are the one;s who get indicted for helping hurting people out.
ortho----chemo brain does sort of go away. Now, the pain in my legs and my loss of balance...fairly new. Maybe (hopefully) MS so I can die slow and painfully, the way I;ve lived. Karma;s a beeyotch, Trilby. rememeber that, stupid girl (me, not you)
I feel ill and I don't know why. I'm feeling very low and depressed.
You mentioned elsewhere that you've stopped all your meds, including the antidepressants. Could that have something to do with it?
Yeah, what meds, also? The half-life for Effexor is the shortest, and the withdrawal after one day is horrific.
Did you just stop cold turkey? Did you do it under a doctor's care? It can be dangerous, MTP. Take care of yourself, will you?
I stopped cymbalta, seroquel (I hadn't been on it long), abilify, and some med they gave me for PTSD called prazosin. I don't have PTSD, just bad nightmares about work.
Yes I stopped cold turkey, yes I know it was bad. But I couldn't function on the drugs, I think the seroquel was the worse of it. I stopped pretty much the day they fired me. I tried taking seroquel the other night and then couldn't function for 24hrs. I just couldn't do the drugs anymore and clearly they were not helping me with my job which was the whole reason I was taking that shit anyway.
Don't worry, I don't plan on not being under a doctor's care. I just have to find a new one, one thats not gonna insist on putting me on drugs. I'm done with them. I want to be in therapy and all I'm just waiting until I have new insurance.
I have a touch of bronchitis and I haven't been feeling well since I bumped my head yesterday morning. Maybe I have a concussion.
goodness, mtp. That sounds bad. Werent' you an antibiotics for your bronchitis? Make sure you monitor yourself.
That Seroquel can be powerful stuff. I am prescribed it, and when I first took it, I got knocked for a loop. However, I have the tolerance of a mule, and after a few days, I was OK with it. Still, if it's not helpful to you, I sure wouldn't mess with it. Hope you can find a competant doc to monitor your meds. It's no fun when some idiot doctor gives you a script for something that makes you feel even worse. :(
It's no fun when some idiot doctor gives you a script for something that makes you feel even worse. :(
Sometimes it takes perseverance and honest discussion to figure out what works when you've asked for help in a crisis.
Sometimes it takes perseverance and honest discussion to figure out what works when you've asked for help in a crisis.
Absolutely! I have had doc's who have been outstanding in this way. I also have had physcians who are spread far to thin, attempting to serve a large patient population in underfunded clinics.
Alas, this is my situation at the moment. I see my doctor every 3 months whether I need to or not, and she is available in y town only 2 days a week. The rest of the time, I've have gotten med advise from a woman who has training as a medical assistant - not even a PA. In once such instance that advise turned into a disaster.
I'm sick. :-( Some kind of stomach bug, though it seems of the 24 hour variety. I had saltines and water for breakfast; for lunch I had the same thing as my 6 month old -- infant oatmeal and applesauce. Hope I feel up to real food this evening.
Fuck Cancer.
Rest in peace brother. I shall never forget you and am proud and honored to of known you. You will always be my copilot no matter what.
I'm sorry, philthy. Fuck cancer.
Sorry man. That really sucks.
I'm sorry to hear, Fred. May he be in a better place.
Fuck Cancer in the EYE !!!!!
Sorry for the Loss Bro !!
Sorry for your loss, phlthy. :(
Sent by thought transference
Sorry, plthijinx. Fuck cancer. :(
Sorry for your loss, Philthy. :(
I'll add my sympathies to the bunch. It's so, so hard to have someone leave like that.
it's horrid.
Had a pretty bad scare yesterday.. not sure we are in the clear yet, but things are better this morning.
Yesterday around 11am we noticed Aesa was not moving right. She was "lazy"and kept laying down. By 11:30 we realized her back end was not working! This was not just a case of a leg going to sleep, or just too tired to really move much. She couldn't move. She could not stand up on her own. We got her up on the couch and she tried to lift her head, she wobbled a lot and could not even keep her head up long. All signs pointed to bad... very bad. Heart issues? ( we both remembered our Freya 10 months ago) Stroke? could paralize the back end. Something else neurological?
I called 4 vets, and not one was available. One we could go to, but the vet was on a farm call, and could be hours longer.... Our son remembered a freind of his mom used to be a vet assistant. So he called her. She came right over and checked Aesa out. The symptoms were scary, but not "exactly scary enough to be... stroke, heart, seisures etc" Aesa was alert, eyes were clear and focused, she just could't walk. When she did try she slowly fell down, and then started to shake. We were assured it was just "shock shakes" and that she was ok. The Lady suggested we take her to the vet, as her concern was a temperature change from front end to back end. She was concerned about a blood clot or something like that. So off we go.. We get to the same vet clinic we were at with Freya, in the same room. My hubby looks visably shaken and I am getting stressed out even more. I have been fighting a fever for 4 days and this is not helping. I soon realize Aesa is not comfy in here either, and ask to be changed rooms. They moved us over, and everyone relaxed visably.
We waited over an hour for the vet to get back. She takes a look at Aesa, goes through a quick exam. Says she must have eaten something not good for her, and that she looks like she is recovering just fine and we should take her home. Thats it we ask, and she says yes, heart, eyes, blood pressure, colour, muscle tone, coat, teeth... all perfect. We see this all the time she says. She might have eaten a house plant, some bad food, or pot. A dog on pot will have the same symptoms. Really, thats all you got? There is a 95% chance she did NOT get any pot. BUT we did have company over that smoke, and they did put the roaches in the ashtray. Did they leave enough in there to cause this? No clue, I was in bed, and my hubby said he really was not paying attention. Aesa did eat part of 2 house plants yesterday morning as well... she is part goat I swear. I'm 99% sure my china doll plant is non-toxic, as my cats used to eat the whole plant years ago... it was their favorite. The other one... I don't even know what its called, so I have no clue. I think its part of the violet family. Waxy bunches leaves, with small yellow flowers.
Anyway, the vet sent us home without so much as a blood test. $200 later since it was the weekend. Aesa wobbled a bit, planted her self on Dad, and had a long nap. She then got up, jumped of the couch and ran around the living room 3 times and barked at dad, once each trip around. This is her "I have to go pee" dance. So out to pee she went. She came back in, had her dinner and a drink, and then once again planted herself on Dad and went back to sleep.
This morning she woke me by standing on me and licking my face. We went outside, she came in and flicked her ears and tilted her head ( her"well where's breakfast" look) They had breafast, and she is now napping again. No shakes, no wobbles.... nothing. Good as new.
So now... did I blow 1/3 of my morgage payment on a dog that either ate a plant, or another "plant" or is there more to this, and this was just the first of....??? Her heart is fine, 2 vets agree. She does not have a murrmur or cardiomyopathy. There blood pressure and colouring was fine, both agreed on that too. Temp was fine. Both agreed it was not a stroke, as her eyes were focused and ok. I can't lose another dog so close together. 2 in a year... no thanks. But she seems fine now. Terrified, over sensitive due to illness and the brutal reminder of Freya's passing, maybe we are just over reacting.
Has anyone had this happen to them? Any ideas on what else it could be? Should I be worried?
What a scare! But if two vets and a vet assistant all agree she's fine, she's probably fine.
Sounds awful and scary as shit. I don't think you're over reacting at all.
The lack of any other worrying symptoms is encouraging though. Worth keeping an eye on her, but if this is something vets see quite often then there's no reason to assume anything more sinister is going on.
A little added vigilance for a while, but try not to worry too much.
Our Lab went paraplegic overnight and we were told it was a stroke (didn't make sense, though a spinal cord lesion would). She regained some strength in her hind end very slowly; I got her one of those wheeled carts that let her use as much as she could but supported her otherwise.
Your dog sounds like she had a toxic ingestion. If there were a bunch of roaches lying around in ashtrays, my thought is there's a 95% chance that she DID ingest pot.
If there was alcohol or caffeine around they can be really bad for dogs too.
There'd have to be a lot of roaches, or roaches with a lot left on them for there to be much there to ingest I'd have thought. Maybe a little bit of pot was dropped during rolling and puppeh got her chops on that ;P
Maybe... I was asleep.. I have no idea what was or was not here. She has eaten ashtrays before though... just plain butts. Then again this is the dog that eats paint, light bulbs, boxes, you name it, she will try to eat it.
She is fine today. I just asked her if she wanted a bath, and she hopped/bounced/skipped her way down to the tub, and jumped in. She had her bath, she then gave moral support for Loki's bath and then they played the eat the air from the hair dryer game, bouncing around and playing with me, and now is laying on my feet.
VENTING HERE.
Met a man, had a chat.
Random encounter - I have no social life, so I thought he might be a friend if nothing else.
We met again on Saturday. Not even a date.
When we parted the deal was that we were in a similar situation, and it would be good to be friends/ get to know eachother.
I got a text on Sunday (in txtspk) just asking how I was.
Now it was a family day yesterday - 'rents 45th anniversary.
I made cakes & helped prep the paella which is their traditional anniversary meal. I admit I ignored the text at the time (cakes in oven) then came back to it after the meal & sharing day. 20.00.
I replied, but in the mean time two texts came through asking me if I was happy with the free drinks he'd bought me (what? one was fizzy water and I turned down dinner or a taxi home) and the next saying he would leave my boots - wellies - outside the Dairy Maid, which is where he picked me up from the day before. I'd worn them for a walk in the woods.
I was all churned up. Freaked out, thinking it was because I delayed sending a text. Angry that someone could be so rude with no reason. Confused because if it wasn't the text then WTF?
So I responded asking if he was okay (benefit of the doubt).
Left my phone on silent all day, did not want to be stressed out by made-up drama, but no call or text (phew!)
Checked it when I got home at 16.00. Then again probably 19.30.
Somewhere during that time he sent another text confirming he had left my wellies OUTSIDE the pub and calling me a con and a liar.
I AM SO ANGRY.
I hate being mis-judged or mis-represented.
I told him no lies, asked for NOTHING, had a couple of beers with him but nothing extreme.
I mean the first time we met - briefly - I bought him a drink.
What sort of con out to bleed a man dry refuses dinner and a taxi and kills the golden goose by not texting back?
I knew he had issues. I heard a lot of them on Saturday.
I even came home and said to Mum - he's okay, but he has had a hard time (meaning I'm not sure we have a lot in common and I'm wary).
I really want to know why he said those things and be able to refute the claims.
Because whatever he believes is not true.
But of course it is not worth it.
I met him twice and I don't want drama.
And I do not want to associate with this person.
I know. Silly thing to get upset about.
It's definitely more about my anger at being called names than anything.
And it looks like I lost my lovely peacock wellies.
Fucking arsehole.
One of our Service dept lot attendants killed himself over the weekend.
What bothers me is that I heard about it first thing this morning, and then completely forgot about it until just now.
@ Sundae: Bullet dodged. Though I can understand wanting to 'clear your name' as it were :p
@ Jim: ach, yeah I can see how that would be upsetting.
@Sundae - I agree with Dana, definite bullet dodged. The guy sounds pretty scary, frankly. Getting weird and angry after two casual meetings? Eewwww. Sorry about the wellies, though.
Yeah...there's a thought. watch your back for a bit love. Let's not add a psycho stalker to your list of worries :P
My cousin Scott is 37, and has two kids ages 4 and 1. He's just been diagnosed with colon cancer. Same thing his father (my uncle) died from, and our shared grandmother died from.
I'm not due for my next colonoscopy screening until 2015, but today I called my GI doc to bump it up to this year.
I'm sorry, Clod.
Glad you're going to get checked out.
Sundae - some people are fucked up. There's no need to take it personally. Apparently your inner warning beacon was already going off. Good job on being aware of it. I once had a similar experience. People get their feelings hurt and lash out. We all do it from time to time. Move on. ;)
Jim - don't feel guilty. You're a good guy. You didn't forget on purpose. He was a peripheral person in your life. You can't mourn everyone. No heart is big enough for that. Not even yours.
Clod - good for you. I'd be shitting myself too if I were in your boat.
I'm pissed that my cousin hadn't gotten a screening since 30 (which is the last time I had one, results completely clean.) He knew the family history, dammit. Still, at least he went straight to the doctor at the first hint of a symptom. It's stage 2, and they say he has about an 80% chance of permanent remission after treatment.
Sorry to hear about your coworker, Jim. Did he leave any family behind? Did you know him very well?
well.
Wow.
I guess this IS the upsetting thread.
I"ve a pal with a hubby who has an inoperable brain tumor; young guy, little kids, the whole deal.
Sorry, Jim, about your coworker. I've always wondered what went thru a suicides mind just before they act. Before I'd have the courage I'd have to be blind drunk----which I have done. I drank a fifth of 90 proof and chugged 60 (10)mg valiums and woke up the next day. WHY? not why did I do it, that I know, but WHY didn't I die? And that was not the first time I've done such a stupid thing. It's the drink that does it.
Sundae--the man is clearly a nut case==wanting to control you already? Usually they wait till you're married or knocked up before they try to smother you with "love".
Wait it out.
I'm still crying/missing Autumn.
This new dog....sigh. I should just name him Rebound. He's too much of everything and he's a dog whereas Autumn was a person. She was so loyal---she was the only one who loved me and I loved her. So, so much.
Everyone thinks I'm crazy, a basket case, a loser but Autumn didn't think that. I have no one. my younger son was supposed to see me yesterday but he's too busy and my older boy is just about to graduate college and here I sit, still in my pj's hating this dog b/c he chases and terrorizes the cats and ISN"T AUTUMN.
I (at the suggestion of my therapist) read her a few of my poems. She managed to have a concerned, bewildered, disappointed and perplexed look on her face all at the same time. She said, "What's the meaning of that poem?" She does not deal in wallowing. The poems weren't about Autumn but about some aspects of my life----I'm nobody's poet but they're like milking a snake for me----gets some of the venom out.
I KNOW I am not dealing with BIG issues like so many people are. but I am so sad and I am crying; supposed to chair a meeting today and I totally spaced on it and didn't go. AA isn't really helping me. It never really has. I'm an emotional cripple---merc got that right about me. I feel like I'm on a tightrope. I am useless; I do NOTHING productive save clean my own house. I can't meet the world on the world's terms. I want an anodyne, I want escape. Autumn is in the cold, hard, cold, cold ground when, if I had been more mindful, she'd be alive today.
What do i have? Nothing. No one. voices on telephones telling me to 'hang in there, baby' and the ever-present reply but you have children!!
No, they are adults now.
Ravaged by an abrasion. That;s me.
Ach honey. It's barely any time at all since you lost her. I was a fucking mess for about two months after I lost Pilau. The first month especially, I was totally unable to get my head and heart around the loss.
When I brought Carrot back, I mourned Pilau all over again.
thank you for your sympatico, Dana.
It gives me hope that others have lived through it. I know Tony has, Jaydaan, Nirvana...Sundae lost Dylan, and more of us.
It's like Wuthering Heights weather-wise here and I've only a bouncy, cat-chasing dog for company. Even the cats won't come up.
I want to go away. I want some sunshine and some happiness before I ossify. godDAMNIT~!
My father passed away tonight. Even though he was 94, it came suddenly. My sister called me from the hospital, but by the time I got there it was too late. I saw him last weekend, but didn't really expect it to be for the last time.
Sorry for your loss Rich ,
but hey 94 is a Pretty good run
Sorry for your loss, Rich.
Rich, sorry for your loss, it's never easy at any age.
I saw my 93 year old mother on Tuesday, and without a second thought, told her I'd see her in May. One of these days, plans will go asunder.
So sorry Rich. No matter how old the parent may be, losing them is still one of the most heart wrenching things that can possibly happen. I hope you have plenty of support people around. Xx
I'm sorry for your loss Rich.
Rich that must hurt.
I'm so sorry. I know you were prepared, but my heart goes out to you.
My love to you and your family.
There is no such thing as complete preparation, only varying degrees of adequacy. Though it may not feel like enough, it can be enough. I hope... Ugh.
I've lost my father, I recently lost my aunt. I want to be most helpful to you Rich. I'm just so sorry to hear such news. My heart goes out to you.
Oh Rich, I'm so sorry. *hugs*
I'm so sorry Rich. I don't know what to say in these situations---they are so painful; even if he was 94. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family as you try to process this loss.
the loss of a father, no matter how old or infirm, has got to be gut wrenching.
thank you for your sympatico, Dana.
It gives me hope that others have lived through it. I know Tony has, Jaydaan, Nirvana...Sundae lost Dylan, and more of us.
It's like Wuthering Heights weather-wise here and I've only a bouncy, cat-chasing dog for company. Even the cats won't come up.
I want to go away. I want some sunshine and some happiness before I ossify. godDAMNIT~!
Oh you could certainly use some sunshine m'dear :)
You will get through. It'll all shake down to normality eventually.
I think I cried more for Pilau than I have cried for anything else my whole life. Boneshaking, tearing me from inside griefstricken keening. Awful, awful. I used to get his furlined coat that he used to wear when it was cold and hold it to my face to try and smell him. Not the wet dog smell, but that smell they have when they're warm and sleepy. And I measured the progress of each day against the longest time I'd spent away from him when he was alive. And how many times I had broken down in tears each day.
It was quite a long time before I realised I'd gone a whole day without crying.
Then I went through a mini version of it again when I brought Carrot home. Everything he did and didn't, everything he was and wasn't a stark reminder that Pilau wasn't here.
I'm not sure if people who aren't into animals can understand the depth of feeling that can exist between a dog (or cat) and it's person. especially when it's just the two of you. That one on one friendship between you Autumn was a profound thing. Is a profound thing. It doesn't just switch off because she's off to the bridge (;p).
It helped me to have Pilau's picture on my computer desktop. It's always on. For the first couple of months I said goodnight to him when I turned it off at night, and good morning when I turned it on each day. I still talk to him occasionally. It's like he almost exists there on the screen. I consider that he has been standing watch over his namesake, Carrot Pilausson. I consider that he is pleased. Because he would not want me and the house unguarded, or the territory unmarked in his absence. And when grief struck me, and even now, verrrry occasionally it can steal over me, and I cried, what brought me round was noticing his face watching me, and wanting to tell him i was alright, like I would have done when he came to me during upsets and sorrows. Somehow I managed to invest enough of him into that image, that I really did feel the need to reassure him, to wipe my eyes and raise a smile.
It wasn't without moments of guilt. They also still come from time to time. The things I didn't do and should have, the things I did do and shouldn't have, the avenues of care and diagnosis I didn;t pursue and didn' know about until after he'd gone, the futility of trying to wrestle tablets down him the day before he died, the flash of frustration that came out as raw anger only days before when he'd coughed the tablet out for t he fourth time and was being really uncooperative whn I knew this was the pain relief that would make him feel better.
There are times I see accusation in his eyes. Or confusion and hurt.
There's no way around it y'know. There are always things that make us feel guilty or inadequate.
The trick is remembering that those moments didn't define what we had. And given there is absolutely nothing I can do about those moments, I'm damned if I'll let them rob me of what I had, or rob Pilau of the importance of his 13 years with me. He deserves to be remembered well. Whatever I did or did not do, I will not allow guilt to taint my remembering of him.
This started out as words of comfort and sharing and turned into a rambling monologue of my own stuffs...:P It's still so close to the surface, almost 14 months on.
One other little point: the first couple of months with Carrot seriously knocked my confidence where dogs are concerned. I seemed to be doing everything wrong. he wasn't resopnding in the expected way on a lot of stuff. And he was running me ragged. I had no control, and any attempt to tell him off or be stern just ramped up the game for him and he became quite belligerant.
Nowt quite like failing to face down an 11 week old puppy to seriously dent your sense of yourself as a dog person.
Some of that was his undiagnosed hip problems, but some of it was just that he had a natural dominant streak (1st born in his litter) and needed very different handling and strategies than Pilau had. And some of it was just that I had forgotten how contrary puppies can be.
I had decided to do it right and bought training guides etc etc.
From the moment he threw a full-on tantrum and chewed his way through the zipper on the puppy crate on the way home that first night, he hasn;t resopnded in any o fthe ways the books account for when trying the recommended techniques. If anything, sometimes I've had to do the exact opposite.
Took a while, and my confidence is returning, but it really threw me.
94 ? you must have so many nice memories. My thoughts are with you and your family Rich...
Rich, I'm so very sorry for your loss. I can't, myself, imagine many things worse. Warm thoughts coming in your general direction. :(
thanks so very much Dana.
That really helped me a lot.
I am very down today -as yesterday.
here's a funny thing: My niece is having her first baby (my parents very first great-grandchild) and my other sister is going to Mexico tomorrow and I've no money since i didn't budget for the baby shower as I was told initially that too many people were invited and no room for us all and we'd have our own private shower for her in march.
THEN we were re-invited. too late----all the money is gone. So my sis and I ask my dad for a loan so we can buy a gift for Sunday (when the shower is) as my sis can't do it, she's too busy getting ready to go to mexico tomorrow.
dad said, WITH NO IRONY AT ALL, "Will 20 dollars do it?"
twenty dollars. for a gift from BOTH of us. for his FIRST great-grandchild.
That's how he thinks. He's such a motherfucker.
Rich I'm sorry for your loss.
Rich I am so sorry for your loss. As other have said, losing a parent is hard, however expected that loss may have been.
Trilby - I am sorry that you are having such a difficult time too. Dana has said a lot of wise things in sharing her experiences.
To you both - time, I wish you the healing effects of time.
I'm a little upset that it appears to be a beautiful day...
...And I can't go anywhere. I'm outta gas/money for the month. That hardly ever happens, this was a short month, too.:(
Might have to start next month a week early...
...but didn't really expect it to be for the last time.
We hardly ever do. That's a tough lick, Rich, thoughts/prayers/good vibes to you and your's.
:blackr:
I just wrote an exam where the prof emailed detailed prep instructions as to what would and wouldn't be covered ... and 80% of the exam was on what she said wouldn't be covered. No joke.
So angry.
That sucks, but I'm not surprised, it happens way too often. A friend has her adviser do that to her when she went for her PhD oral exam. She heard later that was SOP, because they didn't want anyone to pass on the first shot.
No siree Bob, you don't get into our private club without providing us with a little entertainment, and Boston doesn't allow us to shoot at your dancing feet any more.
Do you get to ask the Prof WTF Ortho or do you just get to hear Nelson in the background? :eyebrow: [/Simpsons] :rolleyes:
I just wrote an exam where the prof emailed detailed prep instructions as to what would and wouldn't be covered ... and 80% of the exam was on what she said wouldn't be covered. No joke.
So angry.
As long as she didn't cover the material in class, I think she's in the all clear. :mad:
I plan to send her an email and also go by her office to talk to her about it next week ... but have to keep it low-key and diplomatic. I still have two more exams and a major project to go. Profs can do ANYTHING they want with their courses, and this is a completely subjective humanities course. Nothing objective. She can give me a zero and I can't fight it. This is the reason I always did math and science ...
My uncle died this morning. He was supposed to be at my fathers funeral, but he passed away sometime during the night. My father was his older brother.
My uncle was fighting cancer but I thought that it was under control.
Now I have another funeral on Sunday and overlapping shiva duties. I am attending a shiva at my sisters as one of the bereaved, and I will try to attend the shiva for my uncle to pay my respects, especially since his family had to travel to come to my fathers funeral.
There will probably be mourners services at both locations Sunday and Monday.
I'm so sorry, Rich. Please accept my condolences. This is so much to bear in such a short time.
Oh my goodness Rich! Condolences..
Rich, that has to be the crappiest thing to bear. I am so sorry for your compounded grief. xxx
My father passed away tonight. Even though he was 94, it came suddenly. My sister called me from the hospital, but by the time I got there it was too late. I saw him last weekend, but didn't really expect it to be for the last time.
I'm sorry for your loss, but you need to celebrate his life and realize that he has gone to Gan Eden where he will feast on milk and dates.
That is a rough development. I'm sorry again.
Sometimes we ask ourselves how much more we can bear. I'm so sorry for your double loss, rich. I truly don't know what to say. Death seems so final to us here on earth----but I try, as much as possible, to console myself with the pain that has ceased for them and the belief, as much as I make fun of it, that they are, truly, with their loved ones in spirit (and also certainly they make visits to us in spirit in the form of inspiration, etc)
I'm so very sorry. What a roller coaster you've been on.
So sorry, rich! Wishing peace for you and your family.
Adding my condolences to those here, Rich.
Sent by thought transference
I just found out via Facebook that my daughter is engaged to the loser bf who convinced her to leave school, and who operates a 'ghostbusters' business when not defrauding social security (gets benefits for a shoulder injury but teaches martial arts and is a wannabe cage fighter). I called, and she confirmed that she got engaged to him about a month ago. They want to get married in July of next year.
I don't know how to comprehend the changes in her. A year ago she was determined that nothing and no one would stop her from pursuing her chosen career, that she would go anywhere in the country for her job, that NOTHING would take precedence over her career. This puts the final nail in the coffin of her dreams. She'll work nights cleaning (she starts that job tomorrow, as the first job selling air filters turned out to be too good to be true) and messing around at a local stable trading chores for the odd lesson. He'll work part-time here and there, indulge his 'PTSD' from some former injury, and let her support them.
I'm numb.
I don't even know what to say, ortho. I'm sorry. A month -- when was she planning to tell you?
She said she was going to tell her father and me 'when she visits' - although there is no date set for a visit. I know. A month. You'd think she could have called ... I always figured at least that. My ex actually asked my parents' blessing before we became officially engaged. So much for that idea.
Her father and I haven't even met this guy, she's only been dating him a few months. Maybe we were going to find out when the invitation came in the mail.
And just now, she's put up a formal announcement on Facebook but hasn't told her father yet. Someone at the hospital is going to end up congratulating him and he won't even know. She's linked to so many people in that small town, someone will pick it up. He's working tonight ... what a way to find out that your daughter is engaged.
eta - Damn fb to hell, anyway. I just realized my mother and sisters will be calling me, all excited. My mother JUST got a fb account. This will be front and center on all their news feeds next time they log on ... I haven't even processed it yet, I can't cope with family questions. I feel sick.
Fwd questions to the daughter. Less is more. It's her deal, let her own it.
Congrats, btw.
I'm numb.
You've every right to be numb, and disappointed, and angry, everything but guilty. You gave her everything she needed to achieve most any goal she wanted.
Now she's made her choice. You don't approve because you know she's headed for a world of hurt, in ways she doesn't understand yet. Wait'll she hits you with, 'Why can't you just be happy for me'.
She certainly knows you wouldn't like her plans, that's why she kept it a secret all these months. Even when the dropping out of school was out of the bag, she avoided visiting because she was still hiding the marriage plans.
But realistically there's nothing you can do about it. Trying to tell her she's doing the wrong thing, taking the wrong path, will just lead to resentment, although you have every right, and maybe responsibility, to tell her you're disappointed in her choices.
You don't need this extra stress either. Don't let this drag you into a funk. like I said, it's not your fault.
head up, shoulders back. she has made her choices and will have to live the consequences. it was very inconsiderate of her to not tell you right away but maybe she thought she was saving you from some stress.
fyi - my ex and i met in college and dropped out our senior year because we had to be married. we were consumed with that burning passion and couldn't stand being away from each other. sigh. anyway, we both managed to complete school down the road. she has her post master's certification and has been president of the state board in her field. we were married 25 years before i messed things up by rejoining the military to deploy again. desert storm had been very tough on her and she felt i was abandoning the family to go play army again. she was right & i realize i was wrong. now she is helping me get through my mini-crisis.
i'm merely saying all is not lost. simply give her love and try to stand behind her. the best thing you can do now is take a deep breath and pray.
Yes, head up shoulders back. Take care of today's business today. I love her but now I know to just expect lies and more lies.
When he beats her - and he will, and blame it on his 'PTSD' and 'nerves', I will help her. But for now I've been relegated to the status of after-the-fact onlooker.
ptsd is not a valid defense in domestic violence. in the state where i live, if an officers sees evidence of an assault or has a statement within 24 hours of the event, he must make an arrest without a warrant.
not all with ptsd are violent, some present with hyper vigilance and ocd behavior
I'm not gonna have the money to pay my rent.
I'm not gonna have the money to pay my rent.
will they let you make a late payment?
First; Orthodoc. Wow. what a punch in the neck from the outfield. You can do NOTHING to stop this, any attempt will glue her even more to him. I know you know this but sometimes, when in crisis, we forget the things we can and cannot control. if you really want to fuck this guy up video tape him doing his martial arts/cage fights (wha..?) and send them to Social Security. they'd LOVE to drop the frauds, especially now. Without that check your daughter might come 'round; or hate you forever. I don't know. My younger sister married a schizo-type, conspiracy theorist who can't get along with anyone long enough to hold a job (they're all after him) so he delivers newspapers which is a job he can do alone and at night. She's been married to him for like, 22 years now. They understand one another though no one else on earth does.
@Moar----parents give you a loan? a pal? anyone? It takes a LOT to evict someone---maybe the landlord will give you a break?
My dad's been a landlord since 1964----it's a PITA to evict someone; footwork, paperwork, maybe involve lawyers....see if he'll work with you.
I'd love to report this guy to Social Security but don't know if it can be done anonymously. If not, she'll hate me forever. Her father and I are already being set up as the evil parents who disapprove of everything.
you most certainly can do it anonymously.
call your local office.
Thanks. His FB page alone has enough to hang him out to dry. Thanks.
you can report anonymously. they used to have a fraud hot line.
Thanks. His FB page alone has enough to hang him out to dry. Thanks.
OMG! He's got the balls to have a FB page showcasing his prowess whilst cashing checks? Oh, honey, if it weren't so stupid it would be funny. Really?
REALLY? I worked for a company that regularly employed PI's (detectives) to prove their claims were false. ss really frowns on that shit.
Really. Unbelievably stupid, I know. Arrogant asshole. People get away with this stuff because there are so many of them, ss can't keep up.
They taped some dude collecting disability checks for his broken too hard to work back issues. He was doing snatches.
He was all over the papers. So he got busted for his disability and shamed for the rest of society.
I laughed and I laughed.
No reason to not turn him in. You're not helping your daughter or anyone.
For example, those of us who pay taxes? We no likey fraud fuckin' pieces of shit.
What his name?
Send his info to one of us. We can drop the dime on him.
Ortho...it seems like your daughter is going through a bit of a change in her thinking. You're probably right to it down to the influence of this fellow she's with. Sounds remarkably like my behaviour as a late teen/early 20 something.
To be honest, I know now that I was reacting to my over protective parents. In the way that until I was finished high school, I wasn't allowed to do anything, and i mean ANYTHING. No parties, no going anywhere with friends except occasionally to the shops in town. No learning how to be sensible about taking care of myself. All of a sudden, I finished school and my father said, "Ok, you're in charge now, so off you go. Just let us know if you're going to be home late."
Boy did I fuck my life up. In a big way.
Anyway, I guess things have turned out ok in the end, but holy hell it's been a hard road, and still is to some extent because I have to now explain my own stupid choices to my own teenage kids and try to explain how differently I've done things.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that she's where she is for reasons she probably doesn't even understand yet. She'll get there in the end thanks to the ground work you and your husband have put in. I know it's impossible not to, but don't blame yourself too much. Just remember that you were doing the best you could and every decision you ever made for her was meant to help her. I've no doubt she'll get her shit together sooner or later, but it will probably have to hit rock bottom with this bloke before she does. Just try and be prepared for the rocky road you know is coming. xxx
mtp, did you work something out about your rent yet?
Thanks, guys - I appreciate the offer to drop the dime on this guy, but I'm leery of having it happen too close to the time my daughter told me this ... she'll never believe it wasn't me (and it would be, indirectly). But don't worry, I will follow through on it. Just not tonight.
Thank you all for your encouragement. I appreciate your perspective, Ali. I know exactly what you mean - I was not permitted to do anything, not date, nothing, in high school - and then made some major mistakes mostly through utter naiveté once I went to university. Ouch. But my dd had a bf in high school, she dated, had friends she went out with, went to the prom, did marching band (with trips and band camp) ... and had a year at university about 90 minutes from our town before heading across the country to 'follow her dream'. I'm just so confused. It has to be the influence of this guy. He's a classic too-intense-too-soon isolating control freak. He's good - she thinks all this stuff is her own idea. I guess - as long as he doesn't actually kill her - she will have to hit rock bottom. The problem is children. I see her getting pregnant (I fully expect that she already is, and this is just one more 'little' thing she's not mentioning) and then, even if she manages to leave him, she'll never be rid of him once children are involved. And this will put the lid on her career aspirations. But maybe there never were any.
I worked so hard to go to university and follow my dream. My parents weren't at all supportive, in theory or financially. I became obsessive about taking care of details because one mistake would land me on the street. I didn't think I'd coddled my kids; but every young person is different. Two of my sons are hard workers, organizers, planners, meticulous and goal-oriented. My second son, and my daughter, don't operate that way. They all grew up in the same household. I guess nature trumps nurture in the end.
I'm still numb. I fell off my diet and bought wine and tiramisu. Probably skip the tiramisu and drink the wine.
It wouldn't be so hard, but she's my only daughter and we've been so close - I thought we were so close - all these years. Rode horses together, spent so much time together, I thought I knew her. So to not be worth a phone call feels bad. Time to open the wine.
Yeah...sounds a little like I was at that age too. I was fortunate in that whilst J was as screwed up as I was when we met at 18 he grew up into a lovely man.
Tell you what though: thinking back to the kind of all in mentality I had at that time, the sudden cessation of welfare would not have forced me out of there. In your daughter's situation, at that age I'd have followed the guy down into penury and instability.
I'd be very cautious of intervening in any way with their domestic setup, regardless of how anonymous it is.
That's good advice. Trying to make her feel supported enough that she wouldn't do something like this has totally failed; I don't want to drive her farther away. Just have to step way, way back and let events unfold. Hard to lose a daughter. And if she's pregnant ... I can't bear to think what will happen to that child. I have already buried one granddaughter. What would be even worse would be to watch a grandchild growing up in an untenable situation.
...
friend. You're not losing a daughter, you're gaining an adult. Well, what you're watching from your distance is an adult in the making.
Too soon to find out if this particular round of life lessons will have a lasting positive effect, sometimes a makeup exam is in order, sometimes more than one. But
this is an experience lesson, not a tell lesson, not a show lesson. You have done your best, you must know that. You have more work to do, and it will be hard. Hard to watch your kids suffer the slings and arrows etc, etc. But that's what sticks, that's what leaves a mark to remind them...well, that didn't work out so well last time, I think I'll xyz instead.
on top of which, you can't change it for the better at this late date anyhow. I suffer along with you though, as all your friends who also parents suffer. Pass the wine, willya?
eta: A couple thoughts I've posted before. first,
you've done your best, now you get to watch your work take effect:
OC:
I have been bowling a number of times in my life. Have you ever been bowling? You go to a special place where the supplies and the equipment and the professionals are all gathered together to do it. You usually go with other people. You pay your money and then walk past racks and racks of mostly similar round-y things with holes in them, and for the rookies, picking out "the one" can be troublesome.
Eventually, you pick a ball that you like, it fits your hand, you can carry it easily, maybe you like how it looks, whatever. Finally, it's your turn to bowl. You approach the ball rack, you prepare your hand over that little blower, you carefully pick up your ball and find your best starting position. You cradle the ball near your chest and imagine the approach, the extension, the backswing, the whole roll. You're in control of that ball. The ball can do nothing without you, and you have a plan. You start your move and things begin to happen faster and more variables come into play. Is the floor slippery? Will I stop before the foul line? Can I hang on to the ball at the end of my backswing? Should I go before the guy in the other lane or is he waiting for me? Don't forget to aim for the pocket behind the 1-pin. Be smoooooth. Criminee! RELEASE!
Now the ball is rocketing toward the pins, it's out of your hands. But think about what almost always happens on the way down the lane. The contortions and gyrations of "body english" make NO difference to the ball or the pins, yet we're helpless to resist the urge to twist and lean and talk--to the ball!! But the ball is gone.
KEEEERRRAAASSH!!!
**freeze**
OC, you sound like a loving, diligent, articulate, involved, caring parent. You will certainly suffer for it, too. I can't imagine anything to add to what you've described that *might* improve the situation, including walking away from justifiable homicide (j/k good for you, and him).
When you have an exclusive choice to be the parent OR the friend, choose parent, like you did.
**thaw**
Was it a strike? A spare? A gutterball? A foul? Regardless, your body english only made you feel better, but didn't change the course of the ball.
Our children are like that too. We first get them helpless and bald, and have the most perfect plans for them. Strike! We carefully approach and swing and release--and the rest is up to them. Thankfully, the analogy breaks down a little here. You've certainly done your part to affect your son's trajectory and now it's largely up to him. I know what I'm talking about I have an 18 year old stepson at home right now myself. It's out of my hands. But your son, and mine, can still hear our voices. Continue to be reasonable (no one on one, that's not out of line) and more importantly, consistent.
But the kicker is this: find a way, some way, to learn HIS ideas and include them in the dialogue. This is imperative. I'm afraid I don't have any special clues or dumb analogies to illustrate this, but it is really important. With it, you can hope that your input can have an effect. Without it, it's all just body english.
second, about
the three kinds of lessons:
As a parent, some lessons I *tell* to my son. Some lessons I *show* him. Some lessons I leave for him to discover on his own. Of the three, the third one is the most potent teaching method. It's not always appropriate. "Don't play in the street" is a tell lesson--the stakes are too high to permit an error. How to ride a skateboard is a show lesson--at least at the beginning--he's way better than me now. How to get along with his peers is mostly a (series of) self discovery lessons.
The three methods are not mutually exclusive, of course. And parental temperament plays a big factor in this kind of social dynamic. I prefer the self discovery angle, but not exclusively. Others here have posted their preference for a much more authoritarian stance, mercy and Radar are a couple of examples that come to mind.
I see the parents taking this third track. They may also be doing (or have done) the others too. Where's the harm? What are the stakes, the cost of failure? Pretty low in my estimate. That's a good candidate for learning on their own.
I know this is a 'discovery' type lesson; she's chosen that. The stakes and cost of failure are high, though. She's changed the odds of being able to support herself independently in a career she loves from being generally in her favor to being very much against her. She could be that rare exception but most of us aren't. She's also put herself in the position of not being able to walk away from a bad relationship and know she can support herself. And, once children are involved, her chance of crafting a life that includes all the elements important to her virtually disappears when the father is an immature asshat who indulges his imaginary 'PTSD' and 'nerves' at the slightest excuse.
But these are her choices. You don't get do-overs in the big stuff; she's permanently trashing her career options in that industry. Watching that happen, watching her set a match to her own dreams, is hard. Watching the asshat manipulate her for his own narcissistic benefit is hard. But watching is all I can do right now.
It is also possible that the arrival of a baby will be a catalyst for growing up. For either of them. He may pull his socks up whne he's faced with the responsibility of fatherhood. She may lose patience with his lack of maturity and responsiblity when she is a mother.
And she has a supportive family who would be there for her should she choose to walk away from the guy. Not a wealthy family who will sort her out totally, but help and kindness and small assistance.
mtp, did you work something out about your rent yet?
My parents are going to pay. It sucks to owe them, but if you don't have a choice, well you just don't have a choice. I may end up borrowing from my brother or nanny because my parents are far from well off themselves, but hopefully not. Speaking of my nan....I'm gonna call her.
That's a relief, mtp.
I''m glad you're getting some help.
Oh O This is my niece's story / life detour. So sorry you are directly along for the ride. :( She got her head out of her ass and was only married less days than Kim Kardashian but she has a baby now and maybe life experience that has made her smarter.
This has to hurt you like heck! :hug:
MTP oh crap :(
Here is my whine >first cow calved >twins born dead :sniff:
Oh O This is my niece's story / life detour. So sorry you are directly along for the ride. :( She got her head out of her ass and was only married less days than Kim Kardashian but she has a baby now and maybe life experience that has made her smarter.
This has to hurt you like heck! :hug:
MTP oh crap :(
Here is my whine >first cow calved >twins born dead :sniff:
Aw, poor cows. I'm sorry that that happened, death is never easy to deal with even if it is "just" a cow.
Sorry to hear that, Nirvana. How sad, and a sobering start to the season ... here's hoping all goes well from here on in.
Thanks for the hug. :) Yes, it's going to take some painful life experience. Just hope innocent children don't get hurt as well.
mtp glad you have family to offer support. Hope things turn around for you.
i'm so sorry Nirvana. how awful & sad.
Sorry to hear your bad news Nirvana. :(
I wonder if a new thread called "What's upsetting you but isn't so terrible that it will really bring everyone else down?" is in order?
I wonder if a new thread called "What's upsetting you but isn't so terrible that it will really bring everyone else down?" is in order?
I think that's pretty much covered by the 'what's mildly irritating you today' thread.
I'm getting to where I don't want to watch the news or read the papers. The constant, never-ending assault on the poorest and most vulnerable members of our society is depressing. False economy initiatives. Cruelty for the purpose of an ideological redrawing of the nation. Got halfway through reading an article about the changes in care provision for people with disabilities and had to stop reading. It just makes me want to smash shit up and that isn't a nice feeling.
Dana, you've got to stop reading news the about our Republican Party.
Stick to G.B., or Canada, or Greece, or Samoli, or the Vatican, or ...
Wasn't talking about your republican party. This is what is happening over here.
I think that's pretty much covered by the 'what's mildly irritating you today' thread.
Yeah. But Nirvana's news made me rethink this thread. Sometimes it's What's Upsetting Me and Will Upset You Too.
Wasn't talking about your republican party. This is what is happening over here.
Yes, I know...
Next time I'll add a :rolleyes:
I'm getting to where I don't want to watch the news or read the papers. The constant, never-ending assault on the poorest and most vulnerable members of our society is depressing. False economy initiatives. Cruelty for the purpose of an ideological redrawing of the nation. Got halfway through reading an article about the changes in care provision for people with disabilities and had to stop reading. It just makes me want to smash shit up and that isn't a nice feeling.
I agree and we have almost 4 years left.
I learned my little Addie is in the hospital. Her mother didn't tell me, the "new daddy" told me. I have only seen Addie twice since mid December. The first time was when I was "allowed" to give Addie her Christmas presents from me & the kids, plus Sundae. The last time was at Chik-fil-a when I completed her mother's tax returns. Yes, that's right. In order to see my daughter, I had to do her mother's taxes.
My immune system is low, but I'm going to the hospital to see my baby tomorrow. If anybody tries to stop me by God, they are going to see an old panda turn into King Kong.
Good luck, Sarge. What ails her?
dehydration due to ????? her new daddy didn't know and her mother won't answer the phone
Don't do anything that can be used against you.
Ach damn, Sarge, that's a worry. Stay calm honey. And I hope your baby girl is fighting fit soon.
I'm sorry, Sarge. What Zen said ... but also, maybe some legal advice regarding your right to see Addie (not just in the hospital)? I don't know your situation but some advice couldn't be a bad idea. If there's a law school in your town, try the Family Law clinic. The final year students will put time and research into it and they're supervised by a faculty member.
in mississippi, a custody agreement violation cannot be addressed by law enforcement until the matter goes before a chancery court judge. in other words unless you can prove the child is in imminent danger, you must file a motion with the chancery clerk and wait to be put on the docket. however if i don't pay child support, all she has to do is call department of human services and they will take over and do everything for her! there are several legal precedents in mississippi where the mother knowingly and willfuly witheld visitations, yet the father was still required to pay child support.
let's face the facts, the bitch can get away with just about anything and i have to wait for my complaint to be put on a crowded court docket. for the initial custody, it only took 18+ months and cost well over $5,000 dollars. i'm screwed. i should have been castrated for ever hooking up with a girl who is 3 years younger than my son
Get on the docket. Get the law students to help you, tell them how sick you are. Let them figure out if any way exists to get you bumped up the line due to medical hardship. And if there's a way to hold her accountable legally for your mental and emotional distress at her withholding visitation deliberately when you're seriously ill, let the law clinic figure it out. Or just have her penalized for breaking the custody agreement ... you could have a precedent set that would protect other fathers. The beauty of it is that law students would jump on something like that and do the work for free.
Just ideas, I'm sorry you're in this situation - but give it some thought.
She has blown the custody agreement out of the water. #1 There is to be no tobacco usage in the presence of Addie. She's smoking like a chimney & he's dipping left & right. #2 There is to be no alcohol consumed in the presence of Addie. She & Jay have Addie fetching beers out of the fridge for them. #3 There are to be no overnight romantic guests. She is shacked up with him. She even listed his address as her permanent address on her income tax. #4 She is to carry primary insurance on Addie. She never has, I provide the only insurance for Addie. #5 She prevented me from seeing Addie at Christmas when the court order expressly orders I am to have Addie from Dec 20 - 25th at noon (even years)
Yes, I am livid or seething or whatever verb you might want to use to express being extremely pissed off.
Can you use the "in imminent danger" from her violation of the smoking agreement, afterall your child is in the hospital with unknown ailments. How are you to know its not from the second hand smoke? If you go to a lawyer/school whatever tell them she is in the hospital. Might light a fire under them.
No idea, but just thought of it.
Sorry you have to go through this, no parent that WANTS to be part of thier childs life should not get the chance to. Your EX is really hurting herself in later years, Addie is not dumb, she will see through it all when she gets older. :)
I learned my little Addie is in the hospital. Her mother didn't tell me, the "new daddy" told me. I have only seen Addie twice since mid December. The first time was when I was "allowed" to give Addie her Christmas presents from me & the kids, plus Sundae. The last time was at Chik-fil-a when I completed her mother's tax returns. Yes, that's right. In order to see my daughter, I had to do her mother's taxes.
My immune system is low, but I'm going to the hospital to see my baby tomorrow. If anybody tries to stop me by God, they are going to see an old panda turn into King Kong.
Go see your little girl Sarge.
Stop at the nurse's station first and ask about her, what's happening with her. Be a panda. Leave King Kong in the parking lot, he can be called in whenever you need him, but don't let him lead your visit.
Don't be a jerk, don't call attention to yourself, don't get freaked out. Seeing her will make you feel better, and make her feel better too. Finding out what the heck's going on will too, but that comes from the doctors and nurses. Don't sneak, Addie will reveal you eventually. Just go see her, find out what's going on. Be cool.
For what it's worth, Sarge, if she withholds visitation again at a time clearly specified as yours (not just agreed to verbally,) you can call the cops for custodial interference--i.e. kidnapping. Just keep a copy of your custody order in your car at all times so you'll be ready to present it upon request. Obviously this will escalate things, so you have to decide if you're prepared for that, but you do NOT have to wait to get on a docket if she is refusing visitation.
Keeping your documents with you DOES help.
I recently had a long standing problem in this area resolved by virtue of showing my copy of my documentation to the person who said he was unable to help me. After seeing what the court said, and showing it to his supervisor, I got what I was entitled to. My copies of the facts trumped what was in their system, and the obstruction by the other party was overcome.
Noncustodial interference is a felony in MS. Officers refuse to act on a custody agreement. They will only intervene if the court issues an order. That is standard throughout our state now. I even had it written in my policy & procedures matter at the PD.
Last time I was called out on one of these, it was the grandparents witholding a child from their own daughter. Grandmother was arrested after a brief barricade situation. The grandfather then attempted suicide and I had to shoot him with a taser.
Sound advice from all. I called her other grandfather and he arranged for me to talk to Addie on the phone while the wicked ex had run home to take a shower. I feel better. I won't go to the hospital and risk a confrontation aroud Addie. BTW, Addie has a stomach virus and had become dehydrated.
Please don't take offense if I seem snippy about what can be done with custody. Every state & even jurisdiction is different. Our local agencies refuse to get involved. The reasoning is the status of the custody agreement. Has it been modified or changed and we are only seeing one that is favorable to that parent? Also there is tremendous liability if an officer screws up and gives the child to the wrong parent. The officer then could be charged with infringement of civil rights or evan custodial interference
you're not snippy. and I'm no expert at the law, certainly not in some other jurisdiction. I am a veteran parent and an experienced divorcee. I am also your friend.
You do what you gotta do man.
Thank you to all for the good advice. I'm becoming agitated and I know I need to take meds and chill out.
OMG. So sorry Sarge.
And you went through this while I was sleeping.
Pretty much everyone here has more experience in these situations than I do.
All I can offer is silent love and supoort. In that respect at least, consider it done.
^wss.
my heart goes out to you and Addie.
Why do people have to be suck fucks?
Today is my mom's 49th birthday.
She's been in and out of the doctor's, lately -- every test under the sun. She's been losing incredible amounts of weight -- she's now down to 116 lbs, what she weighed as an 18 year old. She told me today that they found something "abnormal" with her kidneys. She gets results on Thursday.
I haven't been able to see her since last spring, and she has yet to meet her granddaughter.
Prayers, positive energy, good wishes, happy vibes -- whatever you've got in your arsenal -- greatly appreciated.
I hope they find out soon what is ailing your mom Choc.
What I got you're welcome to have.
I think Dads is down to his lowest weight since puberty. No-one seems concerned 'cept Mum & me.
All my love and wishes.
Sending prayers and good wishes, Choco.
Where does your mom live? Hoping she is going to be ok.
Thanks, everyone. I'm pretty scared, right now. We aren't close, but as she and I often joke, she's the only mom I've got.
She lives about four hours south of me. With Beans being a pretty tough baby, I haven't gotten up the nerve to make the trip down. She hasn't made the trip up because she works six days a week and has a phobia of driving anyway. I've offered to pay for a plane or bus ticket, but she hasn't taken me up on it.
so sorry Chocolatl, I hope your Mom gets well soon. :thumbsup:
Sorry, Choco. Hope your mom feels better soon...
I hope she's ok Choco. Maybe it's something simple and manageable. Sometimes serious disorders have simple solutions. Like some types of diabetes for example (that one's just on my mind because of the low carb stuff and reading about it, and having had it during pregnancy etc). Try not to worry too much till you know the answer.
I hope Beans stops giving you a hard time soon too! xx
Today I am rather upset about my son and his mental health situation. This is my oldest child, the one who joined the navy and ended up applying to the USNA and got in and graduated in 2007. He did 5 years in the Navy and made it to a Lieutenant and I only found out last fall that he had attempted suicide while in the sub fleet and was being let go. He did end up with a full honorable discharge and was discharged for medical reasons which is good, he can still get VA coverage and benefits. He got a good job in Pennsylvania in the private sector and moved his family which is his wife of 2 years, 1 year old son and his mother (my ex) who lives with him due to some health issues.
I spoke with him on the phone the other night, I had heard his wife and baby went back to Washington state for a family visit for a week or 2 and I was upset that he was feeling very depressed. Seems like the remnants of the depression that drove him to contemplate suicide while in the sub fleet are still with him. I asked him if he had found a good therapist yet, he said no and that he could only see a VA psychiatrist once every other month or something and that every civilian one he called had a waiting list to get in. I asked him if he was taking his anti depression meds and he said he had quit all of them a few weeks ago as he read that most of the shooters in those mass murder gun tragedies was on drugs for mental health (thankfully he does not own a gun that I am award of). I cautioned him about stopping the meds. He said he was lonely and missed his wife but they are tallking a lot on the phone, she was home with family as her grandmother was dying. I encouraged him to work against the depression, reach out and talk to others, and all the other things I could think of. He said he wasn't sleeping much and not eating, all signs of serious depression.
I reminded him that all his troubles that seem so big are just temporary and he has a good job, a wonderful wife and baby and really not much to worry about. He asked me if I liked kids, like babies. I told him I did and had taken to being a dad right away and loved spending time with him and his siblings when they were babies and as they grew up. He said he loved his son but had difficulty relating to him. I knew my son had struggled with the fact that he married and the baby came so fast and that he had had a hard time dealing with him as a new born, he just had no intuitive parenting skills. Now his son is 20 months old, real active and beginning to talk and running around the house, really active. I tried to remind my son what it was like when he was that age, I told him he looks up to you as your dad and when you walk in that door you are the most important thing in his day. I told him not to worry so much and the only thing he has any control over is himself and how he reacts to things effecting his life.
My wife said I did a good job of talking to him and giving him advice. However, I don't know what his future will be like. Something deep down in side him is causing a lot of mental pain. Oh well, it will all work out I guess but I wish I could do more for him.
Thanks for listening if you read this.
It sounds like even if he has trouble relating to the kid, he misses him while he's in WA. The relating is probably wondering whether he's doing a good job of parenting or not, but isn't that something all dads go through, especially with the first born. I wonder if the ex is onboard with this.
Yes she is on board, she is a really great wife and mother. But the whole thing has been mentally challenging for her to understand what it is that effects him. It all came as a surprise during their first year of marriage and they got pregnant just 3 months after their wedding which was not planned. My son has always been one who plans everything and has a hard time adjusting to sudden changes if the plan is altered.
Sorry guys. Hang in there.
Sound a difficult thing to get to grips with Chris.
But it also sounds like you handled the call really well.
Chris, I'm so sorry. Can you visit while hia wife is away? would it help?
I just found out that Spike, my ex-cat has cancer and is being put down tomorrow. My daughter is 12 now, and this has to be killing her. I think Spike is only 4 or 5.
Yeah. The kids never mentioned him being sick. Just saw it on facebook.
Might be that I'm more bummed about being that out of touch with their lives. I see them twice a week, but.... I guess maybe they just found out. The picture she posted, showed him with skinny back legs.... Kind of bedraggled.... Maybe he was wet, I dunno. i feel bad for spencer and shelby too. And Dennis. Sigh.
Oh no! How sad for you all, Jim :(
i have to stop reading this thread.
choco---I am so sorry about your mom and I hope it's nothing serious.
Chris----I can't imagine the worry and pain you're going thru. And your son is going thru.
and Jim---the combination of seeing your kids twice a week and a terminally sick pet is just...heartbreaking.
There is no such thing as gravity. The earth just sucks.
jim, that's very sad. inevitable of course, our pets die, sadly. *you* know there's a silver lining, being able to support your kids, in your way, at this time when they need their Dad. sorry for your family's loss.
So sorry to read that, Jim. I can't imagine how hard it must be to want to comfort your kids while only getting to see them twice a week.
That sucks.
Sorry to hear that, Jim. It's heartbreaking from every angle.
Chris, I'm sorry your son is going through this. I hope he finds the combination of treatment and support that works for him.
Choco, any further word on your Mom?
Choco, any further word on your Mom?
She said she has an appointment tomorrow to go over her results. I'll try to post once I hear what's going on. Thanks again, everyone, for your concern and good wishes.
thanks, y'all.
I missed seeing Ripley yesterday because the forecast called for snow all day.... which never even happened.... and they had to go have Spike put down.
remember this pic?
[ATTACH]43109[/ATTACH]
He was the bad cat. He'd pull the trash over, throw the litter around, whine incessantly for food.... maybe he was edgy his whole life because there was something wrong inside.
this is the one where he looks sick:
[ATTACH]43110[/ATTACH]
I'd gotten over missing the cats. When I said I see my kids twice a week, I was actually saying that I see them relatively often compared to most non custodial parents. Most divorced dads get the kids every other weekend. But I NEVER get to visit my cats. I tried once to meet Dennis again, but he was too freaked out about being outside to recognize me. It's not like I can go up to his place and hang with him.
I remember how fucked up I was when Bunyip had to be put down, and then Bonzai a year later. They were 15 & 16. You expect that. 4 or 5 years from a pure bred cat from a breeder, though. I wonder if Shelby will be contacting the breeder.
That is so sad, Jim. He's so shrivelled up. My wife had a cat that lived to 23 and he looked like that at the end.
The first picture is great. Never eat anything bigger than your head.
He does look sick, there. I'm so sorry, Jim. I hope someone contacts the breeder; that's just too young. A responsible breeder would do some investigating and then remove the affected bloodline from his or her breeding program. Unfortunately those breeders seem to be in the minority. So sorry :(
Jim, I am so sorry. It's never easy, parting with a pet, and you've had to lose Dennis twice, in a way, in a relatively short time. Hugs to you all.
yeah WSS
Sorry about Spike I loved seeing his photos. Isn't he the one that walked the ceiling beam? RIP Spike
just because it's purebred doesn't mean the breeder is doing anything but mindlessly putting one with the other. My Persian had poly cystic kidney disease in defense of her breeder they did not have a genetic marker then. They do now. Cancer is an odd diagnosis in a young animal.
Rest in kitty peace, Spike.
An update on my mom: huge sigh of relief that it's not cancer or total renal failure. Her doctor said she has a renal blockage, and set her up to see some specialists tomorrow. Breathing a little easier now.
That is fabulous news Choco!
Nice to see good news in this thread!
Dennis is the beam vulture. As far as I know, hes healthy and happy.
Dennis is the beam vulture. As far as I know, hes healthy and happy.
Sorry, my mistake!
Sent by thought transference
So glad to hear this, Choco! Hope all goes well with the specialist.
Again my sympathy, Jim.
Ach Jim, I do remember that picture. The last photo is terribly sad. I feel for you all on this.
So sorry about your kitty cat Jim. My thoughts are with you. xxx
Choco, glad you're feeling better about your Mum. She better hope that 'blockage' doesn't get loose in the mean time and decide to evacuate the premises or she's going to be in a world of pain. Poor old thing. I hope she's better soon. xxx
Sorry about Spike, Jim.
Glad to hear your mom's situation is less dire than feared, Choco.
So frustrated. SO tired of being sick and tired. Still passing out on the sofa when exhaustion hits after work, except I have hours of academic work I should be doing every night. Sick of having sweats that soak through my clothes, followed by clammy chills. Sick of not being able to exercise and sick of my clothes not fitting. Sick of only dozing in fits and starts at night, waking in a panic trying to remember what I've forgotten to do. Sick of blurry vision and chemo brain.
I don't think I can face taking tamoxifen, which promises to worsen many of these things, along with other charming side effects.
Sorry to whine. I will carry on. If I hadn't had a mental picture of March being the time when I'd be feeling better, back to the gym, on top of my classes, etc., I wouldn't be as frustrated. Have to remember: she who expects nothing shall not be disappointed.
sometimes just bitching [sharing] makes it a little better. I hope you feel better soon O.
Sorry ortho. I can't even imagine tackling everything you have on your plate right now. Is there anyone near you who can help you with anything, take anything off your plate no matter how small?
I'm sorry ... I shouldn't have pity-parties like this. I think I need a change of scenery. Maybe I'll go back to smalltown this weekend and see my second son. I should have enough energy for the drive.
Sorry Jim. It's hard to lose a pet and you had to lose this one twice.
@Ortho - it helps to have something (besides your health) to look forward to. That way you're not dependent on improvements to keep your attitude up.
ortho, hang in there. Us "overachievers" ned to stick together ;) I'm fed up with being told that I expect too much. but at the same time I get told that my progress is so good because I expect so much.
Thor's Academic Games coach has a wall display outside her classroom that says "Shoot for the moon. If you miss, you'll still land among the stars" True dat.
Thor's Academic Games coach has a wall display outside her classroom that says "Shoot for the moon. If you miss, you'll still land among the stars" True dat.
He's counting on nobody seeing Apollo 13.
same thing that's upsetting many of us I expect.
Damn it all.
Yeah, I think we've all lost the wind from our sails.
This is a really dumb and selfcentred thing to be upset about when set against what's actually happened, but:
The thing that alerted me to the fact that all might not be well with tril, was when I tried to go to her fb page and got a message saying: This account has been deactivated. Only you can see CC on your friends list. You may unfriend CC if you wish. Or words to that effect.
I assumed that meant the account and page had been closed down entirely.
Then a stray comment from someone about the fact that the account had never stopped working for them, so they'd not been alerted as I had. I didn;t think much about that at the time.
Then today I was looking at dwellar's friends lists for some of the dwellars I haven't seen on there yet. And I saw CC as one of our mutual friends. As on my friends list the avatar is a white on blue blank face, but, I clocked on her name expecting to find a deactivated account message and instead I got her facebook page. Still there. With updates gone, but friends lists and basic details. And a Add Friend button.
I thought the account had gone, but was I actually unfriended?
When I click on her name in my own friends list I get the deactiavted message still.
I don't know. I saw the same thing you saw with the blank face and her name, a couple pictures, and her 'friends' list.
It's very strange. Of course, the whole thing is surreal. :(
Facebook is weird.
On my phone, I now have two entries for her on FB. One with her picture that doesn't work, and one with no picture that does work, but that is missing her updates from the last year.
On my PC, I can only see the entry that works, but you aren't listed as one of her friends there, and all her updates from the last year are gone.
Did you friend her in the last year? Maybe everything from the last year is gone.
Whenever FB acts wonky, I blame FB.
Not being able to ask her broke a dam. I'm still crying. I don't mean just the friending thing, but her absence, and the finality of it.
She knew, I think, that I cared for her. But I don't think I ever told her that I looked up to her. Her approval over some thing said, or written was something I really valued.
Facebook is weird.
On my phone, I now have two entries for her on FB. One with her picture that doesn't work, and one with no picture that does work, but that is missing her updates from the last year.
On my PC, I can only see the entry that works, but you aren't listed as one of her friends there, and all her updates from the last year are gone.
Did you friend her in the last year? Maybe everything from the last year is gone.
Whenever FB acts wonky, I blame FB.
I did yes. ok, maybe that's what it is.
Thanks. Whether that is it or not, your experience suggests a fb quirk is more likely responsible.
Most likely facebook, because she told me how much she liked you and respected your view of life and the world.
I haven't worked up the courage to delete her from my address book. I guess I haven't accepted it yet. :cry:
Not being able to ask her broke a dam. I'm still crying. I don't mean just the friending thing, but her absence, and the finality of it.
She knew, I think, that I cared for her. But I don't think I ever told her that I looked up to her. Her approval over some thing said, or written was something I really valued.
I know. It hits me at weird times.
There was something earlier that triggered a memory. Something she said a lot that cracked me up? I can't remember it now.
I still can't believe it. It doesn't seem real.
dana I suspect that was my stray comment. turns out i don't use fb the way you do. i just typ ein the name and it goes to the page. if i go to my friends, i get the samething you do. scuse typing no lenses. rememebered I meant to tellyou this before I went to bed
Andy has recently developed a fondness for reverse engineering footwear. He's not hungry, he leaves the pieces right there and there's food and water in the next room, he's not bored, Tucker Mojo is right here to play with, SonofV and I are both in the same room, he's not stressed out in any way I can determine, we're all just hanging out this afternoon...
But I want to kill him when I look over and see another shoe in pieces.
That sucks V.
Thanks all on the fb thing. I meant to post once I got home (really hate posting with phone) then forgot. Made me feel better.
I am upset about 3 things:
1. My body clock is all off from flying back from Hawaii and fell asleep at 9 PM but woke up at 12:20 AM and am still awake. This after not sleeping at all on the 11 hours it took to get home much of which was at night!
2. There is still something in my attic. I think it is a rat because he is most active at night, I heard him chewing on something above our bedroom. We cannot find any entry point outside and our house has brick walls! No holes along the roof line or anywhere we can see. We have been hearing this for a few months now.
3. A piece of an old amalgam filling on an upper back molar broke off. I haven't had a metal filling in 35 years so it's an oldie but now I need to make an appointment with the dentist.
Some of you may remember my posting pictures of the demolition of the
Gold Ray Dam in Oregon in 2010.
The year before that, the dam on the Sandy River was also demolished.
The idea behind these demonlitions was to remove barriers to salmon spawning in waters up river of the dams.
Great !
Now comes the "Native Fish Society" ...
Oregon Live.com
3/18/13
Judge to rule on stopping salmon release by Sandy Hatchery
A small but feisty fish conservation group is asking a federal judge Wednesday
to take the [COLOR="DarkRed"]unprecedented action of stopping [/COLOR]Oregon's seasonal release
of juvenile salmon and steelhead in the Sandy River.
The Oregon City-based Native Fish Society filed suit against Oregon fishery officials
and the National Marine Fisheries Service two years ago, contending releases from the Sandy Hatchery
harms threatened salmon and steelhead.
Well that all sounds very good: "native fish" instead of all those "nasty" hatchery fish.
Why would anyone argue with that ?
Well, ....
The federal fisheries service countered that lawsuit has many legal and technical errors;
that the hatchery complies with federal law;
that the state will use newly required conditions for release, monitoring and trapping;
and that the plan needs three years to see if it works.
In its rebuttal, ODFW said if releases are stopped, it will have to kill the Sandy smolts
because the agency limits their use in other rivers.
"Also, if hatchery releases are enjoined for an extended period of time,
it would likely limit or effectively end sport fisheries in the Sandy," ODFW biologist Todd Alsbury wrote.
"We might also be required to shut down the hatchery."
So what, those rebuttals are just the government bureaucrats protecting their jobs. Aren't they ?
Well, maybe not...
The following is what the Native Fish Society's says about itself:
The Oregon Hatchery Accountability Project
The Native Fish Society has commenced efforts to determine both the ecological
as well as fiscal accountability in the operation of Oregon’s hatchery system.
[COLOR="DarkRed"]The objective of this project is to provide an economic evaluation of the risk vs. benefit
of each hatchery to determine the return on investment made by Oregon’s taxpayers.[/COLOR]
The politics of salmon in Oregon is akin to a hurricane.
The Oregon Dept of Fish and Wildlife has been put under
the administration control of the Oregon Dept of Forestry.
That sounds OK... until you realize this is the same Department
that controls commercial logging and is an immense advocate
for the timber industry.
Just because the name of the group sounds good, don't be fooled
by the intent of the people running the organization.
Likewise, claims that hatchery fish are inferior to native fish sound believable,
until it's pointed out that in many hatcheries, it is the wild,
native fish returning to spawn that are captured and used
as the breedimg stock for the smolts to be raised in the hatchery
and then released.
There is a difference between "conservation" and "conservative" politics.
.
Just because the name of the group sounds good, don't be fooled
by the intent of the people running the organization.
Universal truth number 29. I'm surprised they didn't drop "patriotic" and "family" into their name somewhere.
I am upset about 3 things:
1. My body clock is all off from flying back from Hawaii
And I'm upset that
I'm not the one flying back from Hawaii since it presumes that at some point there was flying
to Hawaii.
It's sort of like complaining about lack of sleep due to the two supermodels in your bed taking turns all night.
And if it was a business trip, I still want in. It's better to be doing business in Hawaii in March than in Schenectady.
We've got an astro turf organization up here that is opposed to the removal of PCBs from the Hudson river for a variety of specious reasons that are self contradictory if you look at them even cursorially. They claim to be stewards of the river. Turns out, they are funded by the very same corporation that is on the hook for the cost of cleanup.
I'm shocked, shocked to find that gambling is going on in here! [/Renault]
Opposed to the removal of PCBs from the river ... now there's stewardship for you. :right:
Their logic runs, The PCBs are all at the bottom and the river is now healthy, if you dredge the PCBs up to remove them, then the river will become irreparably polluted.
So, the river being healthy now is the result of the magical, one time only settling of PCBs?
You still can't eat the fish from the river, PCBs or not. More like if we set a precedent of culpability for polluting this river then we'll be on the hook for cleaning all the other rivers we polluted.
Healthy by their definition, maybe. Sounds like they've already done irreparable damage. They should NOT be able to dump PCBs into a river and then claim that no clean-up is appropriate because the toxins have settled out on the river bottom. :mad2:
Wish I had more faith in the EPA ...
Bringing good things to life.
I remember reading about a situation of exactly the same details - just can't recall the name.
In 1999.
Almost certainly the same one. Pricks are just stalling.
Cause if you're CEO, you can spend 10 million on stalling or 150 million on cleanups, and only one of those options is going to get you a big fat bonus.
All together now: "We have a fiduciary duty to maximize returns for our shareholders. [COLOR="LemonChiffon"]Fuck everyone else.[/COLOR]"
Read Zodiac: an eco-thriller. It's not only a fast moving, smart-ass, action thriller, but you will never look at pollution the same way again.
But if they disturb the PCBs/sediment, it flows all the way to Long Island Sound, fucking up the entire river and New York Harbor.
They made a similar case for the Delaware River, until they decided they needed to dredge for deeper ship channels. Then it was "different", and they dumped it in Jersey.
Different can make all the difference in the world.
Read Zodiac: an eco-thriller. It's not only a fast moving, smart-ass, action thriller, but you will never look at pollution the same way again.
I loved the part where the main character said something along the lines of, "That's 15 times the legal limit!" and then lets the reader know that actually, its more like 15,000 times the legal limit, but people can't cope with numbers like that, it's too unreal to get indignant about, so he has to say 15 times to get the right amount of shock from people.
And pateots as a measurement.
"Period at the end of this sentence. "
A very old friend of mine had a brain tumour removed a bit over a year ago and went through all sorts of suffering with the radiation and chemo afterwards and a few months ago, they found the tumour has come back, so he's once again had his skull opened up and the tumour removed, causing disfiguration to his face and many other indignities, and now he's going through the whole treatment process again.
The thing that's upsetting me about this now is that he seems to have lost his fight. It seems like he's just sick of it all and could easily just give up.
I am upset and concerned that he's not going to beat things mentally.
Anyway, I'd be a lot more upset if I were the one with the cancer, but watching people around me having to fight it is upsetting. It's upsetting because there's not really a lot I can do, and that's the part that hurts the most.
That's a shame, Ali. I think it's pretty well a given, if the patient gives up, it's really bad for the prognosis.:(
Yep. Its what happened with Mum. She got sick of the fight and just gave up. I hope my friend can find his way forward again. He's been a volunteer lofesaver all his adult life. He's a great member of the community. He's a loving husband and he's just one of those people everyone is glad to know. His lif is worth living.
Hope everyone that's "glad to know him", tells him.
They seem to have. I think that's the problem. Everyone tries to help, but in the end, it's up to him to fight it. There's only so much a donated lasagne and volunteers mowing the lawn can do.
Hurting today.
Claudette. You know.
Snowing like a Christmas card outside and I can't share it with her.
And I never got her to like Larkin.
All I could think of when walking through the woods in Arran (yet to be documented) was his poem about Spring, First Sight.
"Earth's immeasurable surprise"
He was a great poet for long dragging syllables, just where they had the most effect.
Today is a day when I wonder why I am waiting too.
Good grief in a bucket of crap: i really have seen it all now. I don't know whether to laugh or feel pity for all the wrong reasons. Best to write it off in the selfish ho column, i suppose.
Been at the hospital all night with Minifob. He has an intussusception (sp?) of the small bowel, and they are monitoring it to see if it improves or requires surgery. It's causing him a lot of pain, on and off. It would be hard enough to watch even if I hadn't had coffee and jello for dinner and 1.5 hours of sleep. As it is I'm just trying not to cry in front of the doctors.
Well that sucks. Any idea how long before they resolve this?
You can cry clod. They will cope. I hope it all gets sorted out soon mate. Xxx
The general idea is, if he stops having episodes of pain, then all is well and we can go home. If they keep happening, they will play chicken with it as long as they can. My personal bet is they'll make a decision for surgery around 9 AM, when the regular doctors come back on shift and see that nothing got better overnight.
It can resolve on its own, so they're hoping for that. The small bowel telescopes on itself and it can go back and forth, resolving but then re-telescoping. If it gets swollen and inflamed and gets stuck while telescoped, then the bowel becomes blocked, blood supply can be compromised, and surgery becomes necessary.
I'm sorry Minifob and you are going through this painful, upsetting situation. I hope it resolves and you can take him home without surgery. Sending hugs.
Aw shit clod, I'm sorry. I'm hoping for good news for you this morning.
Oh Clod, that's terrible. It's 10:48, is no news good news?
Infi I really hope you're okay.
Things sound pretty bad. And they have for a while.
Clod - bad, bad times.
All I can offer is long distance love.
Like Ali says - cry. Just cry. It doesn't really help, but holding it in hurts more.
Do not go gentle into that small intestine,
Rage, rage against the inflammation of the bowel!
Yep, no news is good news. He woke up hungry and feeling fine (though this is also how he felt yesterday morning.) He drank 2 smoothies (which he also did yesterday,) and now they want him to eat a substantive meal successfully and see what happens (a few bites of meat yesterday was the beginning of the downfall into last night.) They also won't let him leave until he poops and they can test it for traces of blood, but for now surgery is looking less likely, unless things go south again.
Also, I have figured out what day it is, and realized I am supposed to teach a class at 7:30 tonight. Ha ha.
Sweet.
You're teaching? What are you teaching?
I've been praying for Mini, Clod. I hope that this is just a passing thing.
They also won't let him leave until he poops .
I hope that this is just a passing thing.
I see what you did thar..... :lol:
hope all is well with minifobblechops.
*hugs* all round, Infi and Clod. Hope little one is better and home very soon.
So, has there been poo yet?
That stool sample has 3 legs any relation? :p:
@ Clod The poor lamb! I hope everything is progressing.
Hoping all went well and that you and Minifob are home and asleep by now, Clod.
Dads has a form of epilepsy.
It's now official and will mean he is no longer allowed to drive.
This fucks up his life and Mum's life pretty much. They're not abandoned in the wilderness, they are on a good bus route (with free travel cards) and a walk from a local shop and Church, but it's not how they've lived their lives.
Dad was a delivery driver for a publishers when she met him. She's never driven and he's always loved it. Major fuckuppery to hear in one afternoon, given this has been being investigated for at least two years now.
Me?
Got a letter from Luton Hospital after my blood tests.
No call-back. Yay!
Well. Unless you count a Gastroscopy. Opened the letter this afternoon. Was going to ask Dad to take me because if you request sedation they will not release you without knowing your travel plans. And given Mum's experience I was seriously intending sedation. She's a tough bird and she said childbirth was easier.
Second letter was a copy sent to a Dr at Addenrooke's in Cambridge. Highly respected hospital.
My consultant wants me to have a trasnjugular liver biopsy. She told me she was considering asking for one, but not that it would involve another hospital.
Apparently:
Clinically she appears cirrhotic with a bilirubin of 53, and an INR of 1.7 and an albumin of 31 and platelets of 147. She has a discriminant function of 26 and a MELD of 26, however, interestingly she has significantly raised IgG and is strongly positive for anti-smooth muscle antibodies.
The only word I hooked on was "interestingly".
I'm dying, but at least I'm interesting.
Sorry. That's a lot all at once. :(
Hope they get you sorted, sundae!
Here in the US, if you remain seizure-free over a period of time, you can get your license restored. Do they do that in the UK? There may be hope for your Dad in that.
Sundae dearie! Hang in there. And hugs to you and everyone else I've not been able to respond to in this thread recently.
Sent by thought transference
Bloody hell. Sorry chika. *hugs*
Sorry for being so late on the updates, but yes, we're home again. He's hopping around like nothing ever happened. Of course, he just had to give the original viral infection to his sister, now she's the one who's sick. No reason to think that she'll develop the same physical complication though, we were told it was a pretty rare event even given his history of chronic lymphoplasia (there's your word of the day.)
Sundae, I'm sorry to hear about your dad and your liver. I hope the biopsy comes back with helpful results.
Sorry Sundae my Dad is on the same side of the street as yours.
Fuckuppery is a perfect word for all that all at once! :( So sorry Sundae..
I want to throw my hands up in the air and surrender. White flag. Better yet: retreat! Run away! Run away!
We had a system consultant in and he was really on my side. It was like 3 days of whirlwind meetings, about all sorts of things.
So he gave me some options and ideas...but nothing seems to be working right. I'm trying to wrap my head around all the info I got in the past few days but I feel completely confused. (I do have trouble concentrating these days. I don't know if it's mostly that, a symptom of my depression, or mostly how hard this system...in our configuration...is to work with.)
So the project is priority 1 is giving me fits. I'm getting emails asking for numbers. I can't give numbers when the reports don't return what I need. And...the other things that need done arent' getting done.
I'm completely stressed and full of anxiety and I don't know what to do. One person finally understood the challenges I face, and now he's gone, and I can't get where I need to be.
Going forward I think I have the right processes in place to make this so much easier. But I still have two years of crap to fix, and they offered me The Sidler to help...which is nice and I know he will help but he also comes into my office saying "are you doing that what about that and you can do this..." and I don't know when he knows what he's talkign about and when he doesn't and it just confuses me more.
I am so freaking tired in my brain. I'm finally in a spot where I can at least see the hurdles, but I doubt if I even make it over the very first one. Maybe I need to say "I just can't do this. I just can't." Even the swooper said that we have a lot of work ahead (all of us) and this last week...well, not like any of us can say "whew, that's done." Yet I still have all this pressure and I don't know what to do. :sniff:
And the only person in charge I would feel safe going to doesn't work on Friday.
I'm crying my fucking face off. This isn't right. I'm not right, this isn't right. I'm losing my marbles. :(
I can't quit. There is no way I can quit. I don't know what to do.
I'm sorry IM. :(
At least it's almost the weekend?
Is there some little thing you can focus on and just do, so you can cross it off your list? There will always be more, but don't worry about that right now, just focus on that little thing. You do a few little things, and you will probably feel better. Like you accomplished something.
Its the bloody stress. I'm just now feeling like I can really teach this year. I can't work with someone I don't trust. I know she's sharpening her knives because my other co-workers tell me. I'm gonna try to get something different next year to get my mojo back.
That was supposed to be empathy but then I made it about me. I'm sorry, I kinda feel what you feel.
Thanks guys.
Griff: that was empathy, made me feel less alone in hell. This has to be what hell is like. Finding out I can't do something. Finding myself a failure (in more than just relationships I know I'm not alone there.)
glatt: Yeah, the thing is that this BIG thing is all I'm supposed to do right now.
Usually I'm glad for weekends but a weekend furlough isn't going to clear this head.
But I'm not arguing out your posts. Just having these posts to read is helping me. Thanks.
Can you break the big thing into little things?
Like if you have to fix an entire database, do it one record at a time? I obviously don't know what I'm talking about.
What I do know is that I have a ton of huge things I'm supposed to be doing, and they stress me out when I think about them. So I find little things to do instead.
Like I'm supposed to be working on cleaning out a bunch of workrooms and getting old files sent offsite. But it's overwhelming, so this morning I'm updating a list that needs to be updated, and processing some invoices. Calling a vendor. Shit like that.
IM.
Get. Out. Of. That. Job.
Take your holiday or sick leave or have a GP sign you off or whatever.
Take compassionate leave. Say what you said here, that you're losing your marbles. No educational establishment wants a death on their records (not being callous, it's why I'm still being paid.)
Yes you can quit.
But fuck them sideways; make them sack you if it has an effect on anything you can claim.
Don't worry about your CV when this is making you so ill. What are you going to do? Get them to put a CV in your coffin?
I thought it was going to work out. As many times as I've said I wish they'd just let me go...I still want to hold on to this job.
My family doesn't understand at all. Even as much as it's affecting me...they don't get it. It's just a job. Leave your job at your job. At the end of the day you can remember you can go home to....oh yeah, you can't do that you are alone. AND I CAN'T DO MY JOB.
I've been a good worker all my life. And now, I don't want to work. I don't want to do anything. I want to go away and sleep for a couple weeks, then do nothing.
I'm hearing complaints over a report that the other professional staff is working on. They're all in it together. "Oh, this doesn't work. Nothing works. This sucks." Well I love 'em but welcome to my fucking world.
I'm trying a couple things, but they're not working either.
Yes, I do almost wish they'd let me go. I have no way to live if I quit. Not for 3 months when I could cash in my retirement. Then work until I'm 90. But you're right Sundae, I'm not going to live until 90. I'm not going to make it to 50.
Maybe there is someone who could do this. Maybe it's me. Maybe it's not me. It doesn't matter, I'm completely burnt to a crisp right now.
maybe the weekend will help.
I wish your life was better IM :(
Ah babba, I'm sorry.
You know that I don't know how things work in America.
All I know is this is making you so bloody unhappy.
Sorry if there really are no other options.
There will be options. I'm just not thinking clearly right now.
And I finally just stopped trying to make sense of it and get some records fixed. No, I won't be delivering your numbers for you, have Inst. Research do that. All I have time to do is fix manually, fix manually, fix manually.
It's lunch and I could lay my head down on my desk and go right to sleep.
Thanks for listening. Thanks for the support. Thanks for caring. I don't really deserve it but somehow you all still find a way to care. :comfort:
Hey IM how about a free week with an old goat? Then you just might think things are't so bad. JK. George Dickel is doing it for me. but but I gotta wash my rags before it rains.
Thanks for caring. I don't really deserve it ...
Stop that right now, or there will be slaps.
Sorry it's all on top right now, hon. Deep breaths. Deep calming breaths. And maybe a dartboard with a selection of cow orker mugshots to aim at?
:)
Thanks.
Old goats are alright by me, busterb! However, I might prefer a different beverage.
I'm breathing and calming. So tired my face wants to fall off. Getting some small stuff done, like glatt said...maybe I'll be re-energized on Monday. I do know everyone is tired today: we all worked our brains to death this week.
Sorry for being so late on the updates, but yes, we're home again. He's hopping around like nothing ever happened.
I'm so glad to hear that.
IM - you've already gotten a lot of good advice. But you know I can't stop myself when I've thought of 2¢ to put in.
I think it will help you to remember what is true.
TRUE - You are a good person.
TRUE - You are a good person who is trying to do a good job.
So whatever shit storm is going on around you, it doesn't say anything about you. They can create chaos all they want. But it won't change the fact that you are a good person.
One of the teachers died on Friday. Heart attack.
Male teacher, private man, but one who had taken time out to thank me for the cakes I left in the staffroom (he was in Key Stage Two so we didn't really share a break) and also complimented me on my weightloss.
I just didn't realise when I got to a certain age that people would start dying around me.
That was something that happened to Mum's friends. I've been asked not to mention it online because school is out and they want to let his class know in person. He also had a distinctive name. Sorry I can't do better as a eulogy, Mr W.
They come to collect Dad's car today.
Sorry to hear that, Sundae. I know what you mean, it's unsettling when it's our generation starting to die.
Do you mean that when a person's license is pulled, his car is impounded? Could your parents have sold it if no one else was going to drive it? Not trying to pry, just wondering how the medical removal of license issues work in Britain.
No, they sold it - sorry, it wasn't clear.
Just that given he was told he is no longer eligible to drive it made sense to get rid of the car ASAP. And today was the day the garage he sold it to came to collect it.
He went out to take a photo before it went. This is a milestone in his life.
They went to the supermarket on the bus (part-way at least) for the first time ever. They could go all the way if they shopped at Sainsburys or Morrissons, but Dad still wants to collect Tesco points in the hopes they can go on holiday. Whether he'll still be up to travel/ insurable is another matter.
In truth, with Dad getting older and petrol and general car ownership costs rising, it will save them money not to own a car. But it needs a real change of mindset, and that's hard.
If and when I can be trusted to be sober, I would like to own a car to help them out. Ste doesn't drive and Laura is far too involved in her own family ever to offer lifts (she didn't when Dad was in hospital for example, back when I lived in London.)
If I need another reason to dry up that surely must be it.
So much happening all at once! Hope things look up for you soon, Sundae.
Popdigr poured a fucking ginormous glass of lemonade into the modem last night.
And I'm forty bucks poorer today.
At least I was absent for the clean-up.
(continued from foot's thread)
Part of the reason I lost it before was that my mom had called and I was crying and telling her that she doesn't want to talk to me about my work struggles and the deaths of friends and she assured me she cares and she was so happy when I committed myself and yet I could see her face this weekeend and it felt to me like she hates me, hates everything I say and do. Well maybe not hates but it's like she wishes her daughters-in-law were her daughters. I bring up the tiniest thing about work and she doesn't want to listen. But she SAID I could talk to her.
And you wouldn't believe how perfect my brothers and their families are. THey would make a normal person look bad: think how they make the black sheep crazy daughter look.
It could be a monday feeling but if I put in a resignation I won't get unemployment but they would pay out my vacation time if I gave 30 days.
I don't know. I'm feeling miserable.
That is all.
I'm sorry Infi.
I don't have any advice for you. The practical side of me would tell you to not leap until you have a place to land, but if you're that miserable, maybe you just need to quit. The jobs outlook these days is kind of bad. You might regret it if you do quit. But you'll also regret it if you don't quit. I'm sorry you're in a bad place now.
Thanks glatt.
I know. It just goes back and forth and keeps returning to the surface.
Torn in too many directions. I can't pick an outcome. I can't pick a resolution. I'm freaking tired of using my new 'skills' to continually overcome the fucked up mess that this is. I'm tired of talking myself off the proverbial ledge. Sick to freaking death of it all. And no end in sight.
But I'm catastrophizing and mind-reading etc and so on.
Lenny: "You're such a Cassandra"
Cassandra: "I'm not SUCH a Cassandra....I'm Cassandra!"
--Woody Allen, Mighty Aphrodite
Like I said, I'm especially down today. Perhaps it'll start perking up again.
Take time off. Tell them you are taking time off. What's the worst that can happen if youjust decide you're having your owed holidays?
[eta] put in a formal request dated to a week on monday.
Well I don't know what's wrong with me. Spent most of the time in tears at the PT. Don't feel balanced even though my balance test was great, vision feels fucked even though it's fine. I guess I'm too old to pull off 4.5 hours of sleep. but it's not like I wasn't well-rested until last night. And I'M NOT OLD! :( Can I join you in a corner somewhere, infi?
yes, I know
post-stroke depression via that omnisavant wikipedia editorial collective
but I'm getting shit done and I do have purpose and I am interested in life, I just can't stop damn well crying and feeling sorry for myself. And I can't make shit better.
...maybe i was just more fond of maggie than i thought, eh? ;)
It's the Maggie/Annette combo, I'm sure. I suppose it's the earth maintaining balance in the eternal battle between good and evil...
Infi, I wouldn't be too sure about unemployment being denied if you quit. Sometimes when there are mitigating circumstances you'll get it.
Maybe I should look into that. I hadn't thought of it. Surely with my mental health issues, and the physical issues that the mental issues lead to...
Thanks.
Infi, what would happen if you (a) stopped giving a shit and (b) started refusing to do any part of your job you don't feel like.
Psycho Bitch: Bring me a provisional report on the blah blah process (even though it's a huge amount of effort for no benefit to anyone except the power tripping bitch.)
Old Monkey: Oh, okay [works madly and bottles up resentment]
New Monkey: No. [gives good reasons which are ignored]
Alternate Monkey: Sure. [Goes and writes email to psycho bitch and CC's management and an independent legal firm, announcing you're not doing it because it is a stupid pointless waste of time, and not what was in your job description.]
Serious question ... why is it financially so hard to leave? do you have a mortgage?
Yeah, I'm already beginning to respond to any complaints with, "Oh yeah? What kind of film do you use?"
Infi, what would happen if you (a) stopped giving a shit and (b) started refusing to do any part of your job you don't feel like.
Psycho Bitch: Bring me a provisional report on the blah blah process (even though it's a huge amount of effort for no benefit to anyone except the power tripping bitch.)
Old Monkey: Oh, okay [works madly and bottles up resentment]
New Monkey: No. [gives good reasons which are ignored]
Alternate Monkey: Sure. [Goes and writes email to psycho bitch and CC's management and an independent legal firm, announcing you're not doing it because it is a stupid pointless waste of time, and not what was in your job description.]
Serious question ... why is it financially so hard to leave? do you have a mortgage?
I would like to be Alternate Monkey. I felt I was doing good telling my story to a wig o' big in a meeting. I said that I would keep telling my story until someone heard me or they let me go. That felt a bit like standing up for myself.
Have my weekly meeting this morning, where I get to be confused and nervous.
My 'helper' The Sidler has been very helpful in many ways, but I know that he is making himself look good in hopes of grabbing this job when it's free. He keeps doing research on different reports he thinks will help...what I can't do is tell him I've looked at all those reports and right now, as we were told, we need to keep fixing stuff. But if he finds a better way then great.
My cap is over on April 22. Maybe the next day I can surprise my 'rents on their 53rd wedding anniversary with news of my 'detachment from employment.'
In short: I don't have a mortgage but I have bills. The family pressure is there, too. And I'm not brave. I might be more brave except for that nagging feeling that I suck, and if I didn't suck so bad everything would be fine. And this is the 'best' job I've ever had, in terms of compensation and benefits. Those things mean much to a single middle-aged woman.
Going over to read "15 reasons you might be feeling bad."
1) you do not suck
2) you are brave, but also cautious. This is not a stupid combination. think cats vs dogs.
3) yes, i just did :D
You are in the kind of job at the kind of level you are at, because of a number of reasons, none of which involve any kind of suckage whatsoever.
I'll throw in a few suggestions as to possible reasons, based on what I have learned of you over the years.
1. You are drawn to an employment environment where you are actually able to, in whatever small way, make life a bit easier for someone who would otherwise struggle (such as students who need help financing their studies).
2. You are not a bitch. You are not equipped to play the bitchy, bitey, organisation-be-damned self-serving, stamp the fingers on the rung below arseholery needed to be a [quote] success [/unquote] in the kind of organisation you are in.
3. You took a little while to figure out what sort of things actually matter to you and make you happy, because you didn't fit an arbitrarily defined set of dimensions for 'success'.
and 4. You give a shit. And it's hard to just keep quiet and carry on when you see arseholes breaking the fabric of the organisation with their petty fiefdom biulding and managerial incompetence. This means you don't generally get the arsehole managers on your side.
None of that reflects badly on you.
I just had a meeting with the Int Dir and head of HR. Questions fired at me: well why NOT?
Because this, because that, I tried this...
I got the condescending crap, the incredulous look. ID told HR the Sidler is helping because he has a very special skill set.
No, I have that skill set. He has time. He has them convinced he is here to save the day.
I almost walked out. As it is I'm crying uncontrollably and shaking and humiliated.
THey're still in there, talking about how crazy I am, I'm sure. Diversity doesn't really mean anything unless it's in terms of race or even a disablity they can visually see, can touch. It couldn't be possible that I am, and have been overwhelmed. It couldn't be possible that my ex boss treated people like shit, with short sharp answers that don't lead anywhere except to make you feel stupid.
So the sidler has a skill set? I got more skill than he'll ever know. I'm just in the most fucked-up situation and I'm back to square one: I am nothing. I am not doing my job. I am not as 'talented' as those who have time to chat all day.
I can't put any of this into words any more than I can organize my words when I am being beat down like that. They put it like they're trying to help you 'succeed' but I don't know how that can be when they won't listen.
I've excelled at almost every job I've ever done. Now I'm like the office idiot and the real office idiot is a god among men.
I'm so ashamed.
Maybe you should just ask them to fire you. Seriously.
It's all lies and crap. I almost told them to fire me. Maybe they are planning to right now. Do it. Because right now all I can think about is making myself hurt more than they've made me hurt.
I'm the weakest person on earth. I was sure I was in a place where I was making them understand. I felt stronger. But they have the power to put me back into my place. I can't fucking quit. I just can't. I know many here think I should and goddam it would be liberating but I can't do it.
I'd love to tell them to let wonder child do it all. I'd love to yell from the rooftops that I am more than a capable human being. But maybe I'm not anymore.
I see my psych on Friday. I might ask about some options.
Monkey, did you have an advocate &/or moral support person with you in that meeting? Bring one. Introduce them as your attorney.
Or consider the following.
Dear Managers,
I am owed one month of holidays. I have unilaterally decided to take them starting immediately. I will see you in one month. I'm sure that such talented managers will be able to arrange appropriate cover.
I.M.
I would definitely insist on taking the holidays I was owed. Just put in a formal request for leave, starting on whatever chosen day, give them a week's notice and if they try and say no, that it is not a good time right now, then ask them when would be? As in the specific dates.
Too soft. If they say no, ask them how they would cope if you were suddenly ill and had to be absent. Whatever they would do in that situation is what they can do in this. Maybe point out that if you don't take this leave you WILL become ill, and/or maybe point out that you are actually ill and should be on paid sick leave, and are doing them a favour by taking it as holidays. Put it in writing, CC an attorney.
Oh and here's a tip. If/when you leave this place, you will lose access to the work email, and all the record of this dispute. Set up a single purpose Gmail account and FWD all their mail, and BCC all yours, to it.
Well, yesterday was clearly a nightmare. Lowest of lows.
Time to think has made me realize that it's a skill to make people quit...that's why they brought in The Dragon Lady from Humid Recourses. They save money. I won't quit.
I have been working very hard. Anyone who has ever stepped into this office can see that. The Dragon Lady was firing questions about stuff she has no IDEA how it all works. It was awful. I was the deer in the headlights. Completely caught off guard. It was brilliant on their part, really, but it didn't work. And I have to thank you folks here for helping me, letting me vent it out. I was so close...so so close to walking out.
I have documentation. Actually I print stuff out. I have reams of documentation.
As to making me sick, it's funny that I have a sore throat and a slight fever today. I think I caused it, crying, sinuses all clogged up, draining away. And also: I really don't believe I would have needed to go get help had it not been for the pressure here. All my medical history is documented. The pattern is easy to see, the accelerants to my depression and anxiety are quite easy to pinpoint.
I will take a vacation, if I am still here in two weeks after my cap runs out. If not they have to pay it out.
I lost my way yesterday. I gave into almost everything on the 'what's making you feel bad' list. I have to keep telling myself that this is my life. Whatever happens I will survive. That they can kill you but they can't eat you. I am woman hear me roar. Well, not really, I'll leave the roaring to The Dragon Lady.
Thanks again everyone.
I'm glad you are back on course. :)
Shit, Infi, come over here.
Beg, borrow, steal (if you have to) money to get a flight.
I'm a big fuck-up but I can do hosting. At least I think so, I haven't had the opportunity for such a long time now.
Turn up at Heathrow without a penny in your pocket and we'll work it out somehow.
I'll show you my spider veins...
you know i'd love to. when i get my brave and fearless spontaneous self back, maybe i just will.
sick today. fever, chills, sore throat and ear canals. so i call and say i won't be taking tomorrow off like i'd planned, but won't be in today. i have a doc appointment this afternoon and rescheduled my appointment with my psych that was to be tomoorow. next appt is a month and a half away. doesn't matter i think this dram will have come to its inevitable conclusion by then.
work called me back to tell me something i did wrong. then i logged into webmail to an email about how i didn't do this vague assignment they gave me right.
really, they're very good. i may not up and quit but thinking of tendering resignation with 30 day notice so i can at least get my vaycay paid out. tomorrow may change all that though.
and i care. i used to really care about my work and the institution, but it is obvious its a bad fit where i am now.
wishing for a miracle, like horses, but mostly i need to figure out my own way. i hope i can.
For any of you who may be thinking of buying a home, but will need a mortage
... the world has changed.... Be prepared for PAPER TRAILS.
My daughter has been in the process of making an offer on an existing home,
having the home inspection, and securing a loan from a well-known bank.
Although created of the banks, by the banks, and for the banks,
the banking fiasco has made loan-seekers give up their time and money to satisfy almost impossible audit trails.
An earnest money check delivered to the Title Company,
then generates a demand from the mortgage company for
a bank statement of the account from which the funds were drawn,
which then (weeks later) generates a demand for a photocopy of the canceled check (front and back).
Likewise, employment records are demanded from the employer,
a bank statement is then demanded of the account(s) where any of the paychecks were deposited.
Of course, the companies that provide this data charge a fee.
If there are any other (non-paycheck) deposits to that account,
statements are "requested" for the originating account from which such funds were drawn.
If such a deposit was a gift, then signed forms are demanded
from the gift-or and gift-ee with statements of "irrevocability" and "purpose".
It goes on and on, and the same income and bank statements are queried at least 3 times during the loan-approval process.
On top of being an enormous pain, there are lots
of opportunities for mistakes and/or misunderstandings.
Each of which requires further documentation, etc., etc.,
YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED
... have your accounts in order BEFORE starting the loan approval process.
P.S. The business about "pre-approval" is pretty close to being
Mickey-Mouse paperwork of the real estate industry.
The mortgage company has little interest in whatever may have been pre-approved,
and it certainly does not save any time or effort for the Buyer.
The best alternative: Pay cash !
When I worked for Boeing, they would verify I was employed. Period. No more information would be forthcoming without a court order.
It was the same for me with Carphone Warehouse. I moved to Leicester and tried to sign on with an employment agency, but they required a reference. Fair enough.
Turns out the company would only accept a written request - not email or fax, snal mail only - and even then would only provide the dates I was employed.
The month it took to sort this out ate up most of what I'd saved to live off when I moved.
And it's hardly as if it was part of the Official Secrets Act, pushing mobile phones.
Crazy stuff Lamp et al. Good luck Monkeygirl. My cow-orker burden got much heavier this week so I used some honesty. We'll see how that goes...
Our younger cat, Maurice, hasn't been well for some time. Hard to define, but definite weight loss and gradual decline, certainly.
Today's trip to the vet reveals he has a large tumour on one of his kidneys. Inoperable. Hard to say how much his kidney function has been compromised without blood tests which can't be done til Monday. Depending on the results of those, special food and medication may make him feel better for a while ...
:(
Oh, no. Poor Maurice. Sorry limey. :(
Oh Limey I am SO sorry. Maurice is such a gem of a cat.
What horrible news. Must hurt like hell.
All my love to you and Mr Limey & Jasper.
Poor kitteh. :(
It's so hard when they don't feel well; they can't tell you what hurts.
Hope Maurice gets better soon, limey.
And Griff...good luck dude. They be hatin' my honesty here. HATIN' it. :lol:
And I'm glad I have no desire of following along the American need to own a home. Good for those who do. Since I have no gumption I rather like living in old house apartments where there's nothing permanent and repairs have to be done by the Lord of the Land. I can pick up and move if need be with a much smaller financial impact. This works well for me, too, because I don't see me living 100 years or anything. Part of that is living alone too...I got no honey to honey-do, and I probably wouldn't anyway. Also, no offspring. I'm a nomad in a corporate rat's body. For now. ;)
I'm so sorry limey - I hope they're able to come up with something for him I lost a cat to kidney disease some years ago.... :(
infinite monkey - I feel for you. I walked out of a job that was making me crazy and sick and no respect, no support, back in 2010. Literally handed in my pass card and my cell phone and said "I can't do this anymore" and walked out. In some ways it was the best thing I've ever done..... BUT, it totally f*cked my career, I'll never work in the industry again, and it's ruined us financially. OTOH - I've never been happier - it's all kind very twisted, but not a course I'd recommend to anyone.
In my own corner of the world - we're muttering and mulling over whether or not we'll have to rehome the new puppy - the big guy is still extremely anxious about her, and I'm not willing to turn him into a nervous wreck over it. So far everything we've been told we've already tried. I've got a trainer we just connected up with - setting up a meeting with him, but we need to find some solutions soon one way or another.
Him's heading back to Oz for a month in a couple weeks and .... I'm gonna be miserable enough about that.
Ach damn, Limes, sorry to hear that.
Meh Ocean, you got us now.
Infi, I received an email from work today that was incredibly unsympathetic and asking if I was considering handing in my notice.
Errrr, no.
I will not qualify for any benefits for six month if I do.
Now I am not a freeloader. You people have known me in work and out of work and working two jobs and volunteering when I was unemployed. I do not want to be in this situation. But realistically, given my medical situation, I cannot simply exist on air.
I would far rather be back at school. Far, far, far rather.
The mail I got today hammered home what I already knew - not going to happen.
Seriously chick - think about a break. Here or otherwise.
I can't come to you because of my health. You can come to us - me, Dana, Limey, probably CZ too. Don't leave it too late. Bri did. Horrible thing to say but it's true. Say "Fuck it" and come. Or of that's too big a leap (it's not) go see another Dwellar. Worked for me, temporarily. You know there's good folks on here. Some might even be in a position to pay your travel if you can't manage it yourself.
I worry.
More than I used to.
Which is natural I suppose.
PS - just realised I am giving life advice.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA........
You're kind.
I worry more than I used to, also. Very difficult not to.
And you're right. I am not a freeloader either. But I won't get screwed out of what I'm owed. And I also can't exist on air.
Since it's quarter 'til 5 and I haven't gotten the magic tap on the shoulder, I guess they're going to run out my cap. But I'm ready. If I am able to retrieve what is rightfully mine, I absolutely could fulfill a long time dream and come to the UK (does UK sufficiently cover Wales...isn't limey in Wales...or Scotland?) I'm sorry, I'm a geographic noodge.
But, if they do keep me on the torture list I will at least be able to do a small road trip, maybe Ann Arbor if they'll have me.
I would love to do some travelling. I've NEVER been out of the states. I SAW Canada from Niagra Falls but that's IT.
(I should've made a Infinite's Infinite Work Whines...I don't mean to monopolize this thread. Sorry guys.)
Limey's in Scotland, but I also cover Wales as a roving reporter.
"Long distance" fares - our version of distance, not Canuck or Aussie - are much cheaper than short distance. Capital to capital works well - London, Belfast, Edinburgh, Cardiff.
But you'd have to tolerate me yapping all the time about Torchwood if we went to Wales (Cardiff). It'd be weary, but worth it.
You know Monster better than me, and I'm sure she'd have you.
But maybe think about going further afield. No disrespect intended.
A change is as good as a rest? Rubbish. A change is a proper holiday. Time out is time well spent I say. Hmmm, wonder if I can copyright that phrase.
Go somewhere where the accent is different, the food is different, the weather is different. In the US the currency will be the same of course. But in my limited experience, change helps you put things in perspective.
Of course YMMV. It may be that what you really need is simply love and familiarity.
Either way, take photos, and love.
A young man who was a year before Zing 1 in grade school committed suicide by walking in front of a freight train yesterday. We weren't close to the family, but we knew the Mom socially.
Such a waste.
I hate her.
I just hate her.
After the cheesecake debacle (still no idea what I did wrong in the two hours after cleaning the bathroom), she has consolidated her POV as me as not-daughter.
Diz bit my fingers.
Sounds silly, but I was trying to retrieve a cheese wrapper he'd salvaged from the bin. Greedy guts. My fingers met his mouth and damn the boy has a bite. I'm bleeding. Seriously. I don't mean hospital time, but blood is running over my hands, down my wrist and arm and dripping on everything in sight (bedding now in washing machine.)
So I'm cursing and everything, have to go into the 'rents room to get heavy duty plasters - twice - I didn't realise my little finger was also bleeding because my ring finger was going a gusher all on it's own. The woman is not deaf, she must have heard the commotion.
Go downstairs.
To clean up and put bloody washing in bloody washing machine.
Now no matter how mad I was at Mum, if she appeared with blood stains down to her elbow and bloody bedding, I would at least bother to ask.
I hate her.
So sorry, Sundae.
A cat bite that bad has at least an 80% chance of becoming infected (Pasteurella that all cats carry in their mouths, and their teeth create deep puncture wounds that are perfect for incubating infection). Please watch it closely and get care at the first sign of swelling - in fact, just go and get care anyway. It's one of the few bites we automatically give antibiotics for because the chances of infection are so high.
Meh - I've been bitten plenty of times and never been infected.
I'm more worried about Mum's reaction to me than I am about my reaction to the bite.
I predict: stand-off where we don't talk to eachother; I creep about like a mouse between the walls when she's not around; five days later I make overtures and am ridiculously happy when they are not rebuffed. Same as always.
*HUGS* .... I'm so sorry Sundae.
*sigh* looking for, trying to find words, say something that doesn't sound like tripe or platitudes or... sometimes on the internet that's all we have.
would give you a cuppa tea and a slice of lemon cake if I could, and we'd sit on my verandah even though it's raining and smile and nod about dysfunctional family life and how it alternates between 'annoying' to 'nasty' and back again.
I'm lucky, my mother is merely being annoying today and is blessfully 3000 km's away.... and it still gets up my nose.
Sundae, maybe you need to try and change the process of getting things back on track. Why don't you just tell your Mum about the incident instead of brooding on it? Of course she knows about it to an extent, and maybe it's ungracious of her not to help you out, but you have to remember the big picture. I suspect that your Mum resents it every time something else happens to you. Your parents are retired etc, and instead of mooching through their retirement in their own time, they have you back in the house again. I know you feel the burden of that too, and it's understandable, and it obviously affects how you behave at home also.
Maybe you should just go make your Mum a cuppa, tell her what happened, and you can sit around and curse the cat instead of you hiding it or pretending nothing happened for the next few days, then it comes out, your Mum bitches about cats etc, and you get defensive and it all blows up.
It just seems like it all happens the same way every time. One of you has to change something and it's probably not going to be your Mum, so it's on you mate. I don't mean you have to simper and sook. Just maybe it's time to sit down and tell your Mum how aware you are of what a burden it puts on them having you there, and how grateful you are for all they do for you and how supportive they've been of your troubles throughout your life. Regardless of it all, your issues have affected them Sundae. They have worried about you far beyond what normal parent child relationships should require, and it's going to take a long long time for them to believe you when you say you're getting your shit together, cause they've probably heard it all before. You know this. Maybe it's time to have an honest discussion with your Mum about it.
Of course, you could also tell me to STFU. ;) I wont mind. I'll still love you. xxx
Limey's in Scotland, but I also cover Wales as a roving reporter.
:facepalm:
See, I knew that. I knew that as well as I know anything here...and my mind blanked.
I'm telling you, I have become so scatterbrained I am not even sure what is coming out of my mouth. I was talking to my brother about staying at a neat old hotel in Cincinnati and I said that my b/f (from a hundred years ago) had gone to a Red's game and stayed at that old hotel. Only mom says I used the name of this SCHOOL where I work in place of the guy's last name. Well, they both start with an 's.'
Makes me wonder how many incorrect or bizarre things I say without even knowing it.
I don't know if my scatterbrainity is a result of the stress or the meds. Probably both.
Sorry limey. I know better. I pay attention. You're one of my favorite dwellars so I'm sorry I tried to make you move to another country. :o
Sundae - Ortho's right - keep a close watch on that bite and go to a doc as soon as there is the slightest sign of inflammation.
And maybe Ali's right? Maybe a change of tactic with your mum would help? I'm a big fan of communication, and being direct (or "blunt" as some people would put it :o).
Trash collection... We pay about $18 per month for a private company to pick up our weekly trash and the service sucks. We don't have a choice as the Homeowners Association makes the pick each year and while the city would pick up for no additional charge (it's factored into our water bills) they require trash to be brought to the curb and our neighborhood sees it as a sign of status to have the private company trash men come up your driveway and do what they call "back door service" (no joke!!!)
That being said, they are extremely picky and won't take many things that the city collectors would. Any kind of construction debris needs to be hidden in heavy plastic bags or they just leave you a note saying that for a $50 fee they will be happy to pick it up. And they only take garden trash on Thursdays and it must be neatly tied with string and down at the curb. No empty boxes, they must be broken down and neatly tied with string and set at the curb. No CFL light bulbs which to the low IQ collector means no fluorescent of any kind! I usually just break them up and put them in a heavy plastic bag.
What is more you never know when they will show up. For over a year they have been coming down my street late in the afternoon so I tend to run errands or whatever and get the trash out mid day. Today they came at 7AM and I only had a few things out. :mad2:
I feel small, insignificant, unimportant, stranded, strangled, downtrodden.
There's no sense in getting into 'why' anymore. I'll just say we had a staff meeting which was a lot of self-love in terms of making sure the wigs and everyone else sees what a goddamn indispensible force of nature they are, and the subsequent kudos from the wigs about how wonderful everyone, EVERYONE, on this 'team' is. With an exception. Obvious.
I just needed to say it. I wish I could make someone see it. I wish someone knew how it feels...to have been a vital, hardworking, involved, concerned, respected even admired entity...to now be whatever the opposite of important is, to be a liability, to be ignored and disdained, to look around at the mutual admiration society and be so far removed from any sense of understanding or appreciation.
What was I thinking in my younger days? That my work ethic would surpass any need to game-play, to toot my own horn, to be someone other than what and who I am? How naive have I been?
I still have one more meeting, on Tuesday. That will determine the next steps.
But right now I feel old, stupid, ugly, detrimental, unlikeable. The only thing I don't feel like is a big giant phony.
Thanks for listening. Really, it's what I need. To be able to talk about it without judgment, without narrowed eyes, without thinly disguised disgust. Because I feel disgusting. Maybe I am.
Oh, and when a 'friend' disses you in semi-public, that helps. Oh, I DO suck? Thank you very much. I'd almost forgotten.
Sorry, you're feeling down, IM.
I think you do yourself no favors when you are so hard on yourself.
Thanks glatt. You're always there with a kind word, and I know how tiresome I am.
I am working on the cognitive exercises I learned in the bin/therapy. Sometimes I forget and have to be reminded. The theory is that eventually the better thought processes become habit. But now I struggle and work at it. And I still get upset and I still get angry. A day of feeling good seems sure to be shot down by, at least, the next day.
But I'm still here (by here I don't mean the physical space I currently occupy, I mean I am 'here' but that ain't all that) and I'm still moving forward, slowly.
Thanks again.
That sounds awful, Infi. Please make sure that you're not under the influence of any of the
15 reasons you may be feeling bad ...
And certainly vent away here! Let it all out! We can take it for ya!
Jumping on Glatt's bandwagon. And I'd like to offer you this free gift at absolutely no cost to you, even if you decide not to keep the steak knives.
To redeem your free gift follow this link:
http://www.cellar.org/showthread.php?p=861359#post861359:)
Thanks guys.
(Is 'guys' slang for 'y'all' or 'everyone' elsewhere? I always wonder when I say 'guys' it isn't obvious to everyone that I dont' mean 'guys' in the gender term...just thought I'd throw that in.)
:)
Thanks guys.
(Is 'guys' slang for 'y'all' or 'everyone' elsewhere? I always wonder when I say 'guys' it isn't obvious to everyone that I dont' mean 'guys' in the gender term...just thought I'd throw that in.)
It is in STL.
This is upsetting me. Has been for quite a while now. I'm waiting for my dermatologist appointment in a couple of weeks. Hopefully some laser therapy will help. BTW, what you see on this leg is pretty much all over my body. :(
[ATTACH]43757[/ATTACH]
I don't think legs are supposed to do that.
They are definitely not supposed to be covered in scaly spots that itch like buggery pretty much all the time, except when they come into contact with another surface, at which time they actually sting and ache. :(
You have legs all over your body! :eek:
Start a religion, I understand they're very lucrative.
haha...yeah...nah! lol not my thing
Infini, the suits forget who does the work ,
You have legs all over your body! :eek:
Start a religion, I understand they're very lucrative.
that's my kind of woman
At the moment UPS has me well and truely pissed off.
Thursday I had problems with the brakes on the Land Rover. We live in a rural part of Nova Scotia and are a good hour's drive from any parts store (none of which had the parts in stock and they'd need to be ordered). As the vehicle was unable to be driven with the rear brakes out of action, I bit the bullet and ordered the needed parts online from a company that offers next day delivery. The delivery charges were far more than the parts cost.
The parts were scheduled for pickup by UPS on Thursday afternoon, just before their cut-off time for guaranteed delivery by the end of the day on Friday. We're used to the UPS truck arriving here late in the afternoon.
It appears that on Friday morning, UPS misplaced the package at their main centre for Nova Scotia (3 hours by road from here), while it was missing, it missed the delivery run to our part of the province, somehow managed to get reshipped back to their centre in New Brunswick (that took 2 days, so I think it went by road). This morning it was reshipped back to the Nova Scotia centre, arriving there too late to make today's delivery run.
[CODE]Shipment Progress
Location Date Local Time Activity
Dartmouth,
NS, Canada
22/04/2013 9:00 Destination Scan
22/04/2013 8:30 Arrival Scan
Dieppe,
NB, Canada
22/04/2013 2:12 Departure Scan
Dieppe,
NB, Canada
21/04/2013 18:06 Arrival Scan
Dartmouth,
NS, Canada
19/04/2013 20:30 Departure Scan
19/04/2013 11:07 The package was left in a UPS facility
19/04/2013 3:59 Arrival Scan
Dieppe,
NB, Canada
19/04/2013 3:32 Departure Scan
19/04/2013 3:04 Arrival Scan
Mount Hope,
ON, Canada
19/04/2013 0:15 Departure Scan
Mount Hope,
ON, Canada
18/04/2013 22:40 Arrival Scan
Mississauga,
ON, Canada
18/04/2013 21:44 Departure Scan
18/04/2013 20:50 Origin Scan
Canada
18/04/2013 17:30 Order Processed: Ready for UPS[/CODE]
With the way my luck is running, I'm willing to bet that when the parts are finally delivered, they'll be the wrong ones.
The Land Rover is our only licensed vehicle, and with it off the road, we can't do anything. I have to get it mobile again before I fly to Australia on Thursday.
I emailed UPS on Saturday, and so far all I've received was a single apology email very early this morning.
Thank you for your e-mail. I have checked the status of your shipment in our tracking system. Our records indicate that your package was left in a UPS facility on 04/19/13. The centre had identified the problem and package will be rescheduled for delivery.
Unfortunately, we do not have a revised delivery date for your shipment.
UPS makes every effort to deliver your package as soon as possible. Please continue to monitor ups.com and check your package tracking for the latest delivery status information.
I sincerely apologize for the delay in the delivery of your package and the inconvenience this has caused.
If we may assist you in the future, please do not hesitate to contact us.
I responded to them, that their apology doesn't do me much good.
It'll be interesting to see just how difficult it will be getting UPS to refund the delivery charges for their "Guaranteed next day delivery".
In any case, I will be civil to the UPS delivery driver when he eventually turns up with the parts as I know it's not his fault.
Yeah, the driver is like a waiter, with no control over the chef/owner/boss.
Living in the boondocks often requires spares for all essentials, to make life eaier.
Now you're condoning polygamy :eyebrow:
Nah, too complicated... it wouldn't hurt to keep a sheep or two, though. ;)
It's 6:30PM and the UPS truck just arrived.
Better late than never. ;)
... and the parts are .... ????
Better late than never. ;)
Better late than pregnant. :eek:
haha...yeah. I think I'd cease to function if I fell pregnant again. lol
The package had all the right parts, and the car was back on the road just before 8PM last night.
After my third "it's still not good enough" email reply to their "we're very sorry, but we hope you'll continue to use UPS" emails, I've been promised a call from their customer service people by 10am today to resolve the issue.
It's now just about 1:30 pm local time, so they aren't impressing me again.
Tomorrow I fly to Australia for 4 weeks, so I guess their window for resolving this problem has closed.
This is the nonsense I went through yesterday...over a fucking dollar.
OOPS!
Mods? Please? Happy thread?
done. most excellent happy post has been moved to happy thread.
I cut my left thumb pretty well this morning with a box knife. I was cutting a box down a bit to fit a tripod I sold on ebay yesterday and was just being careless by holding a big ruler as a straight edge with the tip of my thumb extending out a bit too far. So it's sliced right at the top of the thumb nail into the meaty part.
I grabbed some paper towels and held it for awhile. Then I went to our bathroom to look for band aids, a useless trip as we seem to have a pretty pathetic first aid kit. I finally found some finger band aids which which work pretty well for fingertips. Later I went to the store and got some steri-strips and stuck them from my fingernail over the cut and onto where my thumb print is. Wrapped it up again in a band aid and the wrapped the thumb with some tape to hold the band aid on.
I hate when I do shit like this, it makes it hard to do things I need to do like finish the garden or put my wife's car back together.
I've found for fingers, liquid bandage is best. Depends on how bad the cut is though.
The great thing about the 'glue' is that it doesn't come off when you work with your hands or wash your hands. Doesn't work with big gashes though.
I'm sorry about your gash.
(tongue unbitten - less painful that way)
My thumb about 12 hours after I cut it.
Now it's 2 days later and it feels better. I've cleaned it up and slept last night with just a sterile-strip on it.
Oh gawd, I did not want to see that. I am sorry for your finger. Now excuse me....:vomitblu:
Jeanie Mac!
Chris you have to warn us before you post those!
(not seriously, like, it was just shock-a-rama)
Nasty, nasty nasty. For you I mean. Horrrid injury.
Glad it's still attached at least. Just painful as fuck I bet.
Upset today? Well.... more like cross. But there's no thread for that.
I got Dad some Wetherspoons vouchers for his birthday.
It's a chain of pubs in the UK - decent, clean, family places, reasonable food and good drinks prices. Mum & Dad like them. £20. That would cover 2x2 meals.
Now I had to wait til payday. Yesterday. Because I had no money until then.
I thought I could walk into a pub and just buy vouchers, or a gift card, like you can in pretty much every national chain from make-up stores to supermarkets. In fact he got two gift cards from other members of the family.
No. Only online.
Well okay. It's not like I'm computer illiterate or can only pay in cash (both thanks to the 'rents I admit.)
So I ordered. £20. And paid extra for Special Delivery.
Wait, where are they? I know they can arrive until 13.00, but these things tend to come early or not come at all.
So I called Customer Services, just to check.
Hah.
If you order vouchers, they are set up for despatch the NEXT DAY. I'm not talking about ordering at 21.00, I ordered before 12.00.
Nothing on the website (and I've gone back over it with ant's feet) tells you this.
Fuck it arriving before 13.00 tomorrow - it could arrive in a weeks time now for all I care.
Customer Services are calling me back.
It's not the money. Although I'd like a refund.
It's being a shitty daughter that bothers me. Even though I tried not to be. Shoulda just put a £20 note in his card, eh?
Upset today? Well.... more like cross. But there's no thread for that.
I got Dad some Wetherspoons vouchers for his birthday.
It's a chain of pubs in the UK - decent, clean, family places, reasonable food and good drinks prices. Mum & Dad like them. £20. That would cover 2x2 meals.
Now I had to wait til payday. Yesterday. Because I had no money until then.
I thought I could walk into a pub and just buy vouchers, or a gift card, like you can in pretty much every national chain from make-up stores to supermarkets. In fact he got two gift cards from other members of the family.
No. Only online.
Well okay. It's not like I'm computer illiterate or can only pay in cash (both thanks to the 'rents I admit.)
So I ordered. £20. And paid extra for Special Delivery.
Wait, where are they? I know they can arrive until 13.00, but these things tend to come early or not come at all.
So I called Customer Services, just to check.
Hah.
If you order vouchers, they are set up for despatch the NEXT DAY. I'm not talking about ordering at 21.00, I ordered before 12.00.
Nothing on the website (and I've gone back over it with ant's feet) tells you this.
Fuck it arriving before 13.00 tomorrow - it could arrive in a weeks time now for all I care.
Customer Services are calling me back.
It's not the money. Although I'd like a refund.
It's being a shitty daughter that bothers me. Even though I tried not to be. Shoulda just put a £20 note in his card, eh?
That doesn't make you a shitty daughter at all. Things happen and stuff gets delayed. Its not like you did on purpose or put it off until the last minute because you didn't care. You do care and thats why it is upsetting you in the first place. I still have Christmas presents to give out and I don't feel shitty for it.
Not a shitty daughter. You bought a no-stress-all-round cake and carried it with care and love all the way through town.
Got a refund on the delivery cost.
In the mean time talked to Mum. She said "Don't cancel the vouchers, he'll love them. Just tell him you were let down and something is coming."
Sage advice from the Mater.
I got him a photo card from Moonpig, which he loved.
And we brought in his cream cake with candles and sang Happy Birthday (and didn't give any money to Paul McCartney, haha!)
And Mum says he was very happy.
I also got up early to make sure all his cards and prizes were on the breakfast table.
So anything else is a bonus...
I still feel crummy though.
Don't beat yourself up over it! My wife always says "In five years will you look back and remember it? Will it have made a difference?"
Chances are most likely it won't!
I checked out the Wetherspoons website. Looks like a nice chain. Over the years of my visiting the UK I have seen Pub-Grub really evolve. There was a time when all you could get was fish and chips, bangers and mash, etc. and the Sunday carvery and mainly beer and ale to drink. Now they try to be a lot more creative and offer much more. My British relatives say it started to change when Brits income improved and they began traveling on the continent and elsewhere and came home and demanded more from the local pubs. Pub food isn't always the bargain it used to be but it's head over tails better then most of the chains here in the USA!
Don't beat yourself up over it. Your mum isn't, after all ;)
Thanks peeps.
You know me - any chance to over-react and I'm on it.
All is calm, all is bright now.
And when the vouchers arrive (and I bet they get them out lickety-split now) I'll be Best Daughter of the Year. Which I am intrinsically, just sometimes I screw up.
ETA - Chris, I must start a Pub Food in the UK thread or somesuch.
Because you're very right - it's changed enormously in my lifetime and I'd like to celebrate it.
Thanks peeps.
You know me - any chance to over-react and I'm on it.
All is calm, all is bright now.
And when the vouchers arrive (and I bet they get them out lickety-split now) I'll be Best Daughter of the Year. Which I am intrinsically.
ETA - Chris, I must start a Pub Food in the UK thread or somesuch.
Because you're very right - it's changed enormously in my lifetime and I'd like to celebrate it.
FTFY ;)
^wss^ Sundae, you are an awesome daughter and overall person. Your dad will love the vouchers. That's what will matter in five years. Plus the fact that you bought him a birthday cake and carried it all the way across town.
You listenin' to this, Chezzer?* They're right y'know.
I'm listening. You know I can never internalise it though.
When I'm in a bad way I look at old threads - specially my "travel" threads and take in the good comments. Feel I've achieved something. Because I've shown something people haven't seen before, or turned a phrase that someone else enjoys.
Me being a good person? Step too far.
Dads got his vouchers today.
He was made up.
I forgot through all the drama, that he didn't actually know what was supposed to be arriving :facepalm:
New wastepaper bin arrived in the same post - because Diz chewed the hell out of the wicker one in my room and the one in here. Trialled my new one for 2 weeks, then got one for this room. So Mum was all cheery-glad too.
This is in the right thread this time. Because it's a resolution to something I posted about here.
But like a pervy businessman, I'm grateful for a Happy Ending.
I'm listening. You know I can never internalise it though.
When I'm in a bad way I look at old threads - specially my "travel" threads and take in the good comments. Feel I've achieved something. Because I've shown something people haven't seen before, or turned a phrase that someone else enjoys.
Me being a good person? Step too far.
Dads got his vouchers today.
He was made up.
I forgot through all the drama, that he didn't actually know what was supposed to be arriving :facepalm:
New wastepaper bin arrived in the same post - because Diz chewed the hell out of the wicker one in my room and the one in here. Trialled my new one for 2 weeks, then got one for this room. So Mum was all cheery-glad too.
This is in the right thread this time. Because it's a resolution to something I posted about here.
But like a pervy businessman, I'm grateful for a Happy Ending.
We've all seen the evidence that you're a good person Sundae. Even if you don't believe, know that we all do. I just can't believe that such a nice person as yourself cannot internalize that. I know how hard you've worked on yourself, keep working and I know you'll get there. You know that recently I was low enough to try to kill myself, I'm no longer feeling that way and I feel like a good person. There are others here who have felt the same, and turned it around. I'm not gonna tell you that if we can do it, so can you, but just know there is hope.
I forgot through all the drama, that he didn't actually know what was supposed to be arriving :facepalm: New wastepaper bin arrived in the same post
I can see him now. "Why Sundae, a new bin! Just what I've always wanted!"
I don't know what he'd have made of the tight fitting dress then!
Pics when I lose another stone - I thought I could rock it as is, but Mum said, "Well a bit off here" boobs "and quite a bit off here" belly "and it will look okay!"
I agreed.
Anything to get out of the convo and stop her touching me.
She's prolly right anyway. I bought it on a whim ina smaller size than I can really wear.
Glasgow this year, if we do it. And if I make it.
Long story short: young lady daughter, with a certificate in digital animation and a case of high functioning autism ... moved in with college friends in Ottawa last August after graduation before we packed up everything and moved to rural Nova Scotia.
Things haven't been working out so well for her there (although she's done well with keeping her financial situation relatively stable) .... so she's decided that it's not working and when her friends give up their current apartment in July - she won't be moving with them.
This sucks on all sorts of levels of SUCKatude.
I'm hoping her emotionally useless but financially stable father living in the GTA will see fit to try and rebuild his relationship with her (not a falling out, more a 'he never bothers to call') and allow her to move in with him and his new wife (whom she does like) ... while I hate the idea of her living with my ex - she is grown up now and the job opportunities will be better there as will the possibilities for counseling / therapy / doctors / services / something to deal with the emotional issues that have made the whole thing so hard for her.
I do still have close friends in southern ontario who will be able to keep a look out for her, provide emotional, and advocacy support for her ... if that works out. It's again... not making me happy, but it's reasonably the better opportunity for her.
I'm not holding my breath that the asshole will show any kindness or support to his child ...
In which case I may have to fly to Ottawa, rent a truck, drive her here .. in late June / early July .... something we really can't afford to do, we will find her doctors and supports and therapy here .... but jobs are gonna be very hard to come by - we're a 45 min drive to the nearest town .... and even that is a pretty depressed area job wise..... it's gonna be hard enough for ME to find a job to keep us going...
Love her to bits, the Feychild is a bright and shining light and an amazing person, and never never never in 10,000 years will I ever tell my children they can't come home to us to be safe, I'm just not sure right now how safe any of us are.
Not upset at her or with her, but for her.
F**K!
Chemo isn't done with me. My nails keep detaching. It's very upsetting, feels like my body is disintegrating bit by bit. I cover the weirdness up with nail polish but it just detaches the next day anyway.
Ocean, I hope it all works out.
Ortho, this too shall pass. Have you tried biotin or is it something you're not supposed to take? Its suppose to help nails grow stronger and I know my sis takes it because some of her meds weaken her nails too.
Chemo isn't done with me. My nails keep detaching. It's very upsetting, feels like my body is disintegrating bit by bit. I cover the weirdness up with nail polish but it just detaches the next day anyway.
I just helped a friend who was videotaping a performance by another friend of ours who is a 15 year post breast cancer survivor.
At her five year mark she and her sister composed a song which she sang to tonight to the tune of My Country 'tis of Thee and now, one beer later I don't remember it. I'll have to ask her to email it to me. It was pretty funny.
I guess, I'm saying that it sucks now and you will live to be able to write bawdy song parodies about this shitty time.
hugs.
So. Cirrohis still not confirmed, but the Chief High Consultant (actually a very charming and honest man) explained that it was not possible to have blood results like mine and not be cirrhotic. So bottom line is, they will probably trans-jugular biopsy me to see how bad it is.
What is of more immediate concern is my auto-immune system. My liver may be facing attacks on two fronts, one from my own immune system, the other from my drinking. I am presenting quite young for excessive scarring, although all the results suggest that IS what I am presenting.
Still, the good news if if I achieve and maintain absolute abstinance for life, I have an expectancy of five plus years. The Consultant has people in his clinic who did not appear as outwardly healthy as me but were still alive 15 years later (then again, the ones that died probably weren't still attending.)
If I continue to drink, in any capacity, I only have a 50% chance of making it for the next two years.
I am waiting for results back.
I have an appointment to see them again in a month as a priority.
Head Chap (wish I could even give initials but I didn't catch anyone's names) is going to try to set me up on Acamprosate to help. It's supposed to be managed by my local NHS but they've always said it can only be prescribed by a specialist (which probably means it costs too much.)
It was a relief, talking to a renal specialist.
I'm scared.
Oh and jaundiced (again!)
And have some fluid on my lower abdomen, but again that was never really explained to me or why it was a bad thing.
And the lady who gave me my ultra-sound had to go and get someone else to confirm the results because it appears I have an extra vein in my liver? Still, she said comfortingly, it doesn't appear to be an accute issue, it's something longstanding. Phew (?)
Had a whole armful of blood taken, testing everything that I think they can possibly test for apart from shock and awe.
I'm scared.
I'm scared for you. Please use this news to help you find the determination to stop.
Oh, Sundae! I don't know what to say.
I'd like you to be my friend for as long as possible. Is that selfish of me?
Sent by thought transference
there are moments I really don't know what to say - and everything I type sounds like a platitude and rings hollow and ... arggh
please, please know that my heart and my thoughts are with you ... and I'd give the world just to make you a cuppa tea and give you a hug right now
Sad to hear this Sundae.
A few months ago my one and only brother confided in me and my 2 sisters that he had chronic cirrohis from Hepatitis C and is not a good candidate for much of what is offered like interfuron. We were all so surprised as he is usually in great health and has been a strict vegetarian for 35 years or more and quite any drinking at that time. Unbeknownst to us he had experimented with drugs via needle back in his college years when he was living in NY city at school; probably heroin, the choice of the jazz crowd he hung out with.
He lives in Taiwan and sees a specialist who suggested he come back to the USA for a liver transplant but having no home base or health insurance here pretty much ditched that. He is Buddhist now and has a positive attitude, he is ready to go when his time comes. His doctor says the only reason he has lived so long until now with this condition was his healthy vegetarian diet and lifestyle with things like meditation.
I really want to go over this year to see him before it is too late.
Is a transplant an option, Sundae? Over here they would of course expect you to remain completely teetotal after receiving one, but being so young would make you a good candidate. Please do whatever they say you should do to take care of yourself. I want you around for a long, long time to come.
Stop drinking Sundae. If you have another drink I'm going to call you a dick. OK?
*hugs* Sorry, I only just saw this.
Call me if you want to chat, m'dear.
Please stop. Shoot for the 15 years.
Jesus girl, do whatever you can.
Damn. Please stick around, Sundae.
Sundae what all these guys said. I have a few friends with Hep C and in addition to not drinking they also avoid meat and rich foods like salmon, cream, butter. Anything to lighten your liver's load.
I hope it does not turn out to be so dire as you fear.
not a doctor Sundae. I do know though that you are smart and strong and determined, all qualities that can help you succeed at whatever you set your mind to. Do what you can, and give it your best effort. That's it, that's all. Furthermore, that's enough.
...
In other upsetting news, though not in the same universe as Sundae's situation, I have a broken shuttle on my sewing machine and another fifteen pack covers to go in the next twenty hours. I guess I'd better break out the backup sewing machine now.
auuurrrgggh.
I love you Sundae!
For me today, I had an interview and I don't feel like it went very well. On top of that I opened new medical bills to see I have another 3K I owe. I'm never gonna get out of the hole I'm in. :(
Most people never do, they spend their whole life "in the hole".
I think the majority are neither happy, nor sad, most of the time. They're just running on auto-pilot, doing what's got to be done... the rat race.
But you know what, they still find a way to be happy some of the time. Not all the time, mind you, but they manage to create enough bright spots in their week to have things to look forward to, and reflect back on.
[YOUTUBE]pOhKqWMhVVI[/YOUTUBE]
I'm so sorry about your situation Sundae. For what its worth-sending positive energy your way.
Damn ... dunno what to say. Do whatever you can to stick around as long as you can. I haven't made enough money yet to travel overseas to see you and Dana and Limey on the European leg of my trip around the world ... yes, selfish reply. I know.
Sundae - been off on one of my juants to deep cyber space only to return to read your most recent posts in this thread.
Alcoholism is so fucked up. I watched it slowly destroy one of the kindest, funniest, intelligent and bravest persons I've ever known - my father. He fought the good fight until he came back from his second tour in Vietnam, and then he just said, "Fuck it," got his pension and his bottle and he was gone in 10 short years.
I've lost so many good people to alcohol. Please, not you too, Sundae. I almost killed myself - at least 3 attempts, anyway - over my own drinking. I hated myself and I had no hope left. But somehow, I kept putting one foot in front of the other. THIS time, I got my 4 year chip on May 10th. Before this most recent period of sobriety I was drunk every day for 3 years, and before THAT I was sober for 5 years. 9 good years out of 12 ain't bad, and if I of all people managed that, I KNOW that you can Sundae. You're smart and you have a kind heart and you're funny and you're just - well, cool.
So hang in there. I had a friend who was told by the doctors he wouldn't make it even a year if he kept up the drinking like he was. We quit at the same time amd his doctor gave him a good bill of health on his last check-up. Maybe not perfect in every way, but he should have many years ahead as long as he doesn't pick up that first drink again.
Hang in. We ALL care very much!
Oh Sundae, I'm so sorry! I just read your post. Please do whatever you need to do so you can stay here for a long, long time. *HUGZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ*
My neighbor across the street has a daughter three weeks older than mine.
During her pregnancy, she had hyperemesis gravidarum -- violent and acute morning sickness for which she was hospitalized several times. She needed a C-section and had an awful time recovering from it. Her daughter was colicky for the first three months; more than 2 hours of continuous sleep was rare. Troubles with breastfeeding and then with formula mean the baby is now on very expensive specialized formula.
Persistent pains led to a diagnosis of rheumatoid arthritis. It can be difficult for her to carry her daughter, to get up and down from the floor. This past spring the docs found skin cancer on her scalp, and she had to undergo surgery to have it removed.
This week she was diagnosed with lupus.
I wish there was something I could do to help her. I'm so grateful I'm not in her shoes.
Wow, what a rough start.
I'm upset about something with one of my students today, but I don't think I want to even allude to what's going down. I'm hoping for the best for the child and family.
At least she hasn't got herpes.
Sad that Congresswoman Michelle Bachman won't run for re-election in 2014. Who will carry on with monthly attempts to repeal Obamacare? Politics will be very boring without her. ;)
Dear Minnesota
I'm not sorry about ur nutball.
Wishing for the best along with you Griff. That kind of stuff tears me up too...
Playdate Choco? You could do the getting up and down on the floor.. Or something.. Sad
I heard her described as a firebrand today. Firebrands suck. Even when they are on your own team, they suck. Everything worthwhile done in the history of this country has been done by moderates and people who could see the humanity and the common ground they have with those on the other side of the aisle. People like Olympia Snowe, who retired because of people like Bachman. Good riddance to Bachman, although I have a feeling we'll be seeing her again.
snip--
Good riddance to Bachman, although I have a feeling we'll be seeing her again.
Not if you delete the local Fox News channel from your television.
A former coworker from when I worked retail in college was struck and killed by lightning yesterday evening.
She was one of those people who was a joy to be around. Very positive, kind, generous of time and spirit.
Of all the unlikely things to happen... :(
How horrible. Sorry to hear that, Choco. :(
Much lower on the scale of upsetting things, I somehow gave myself a corneal abrasion yesterday. I wanted a distraction from my post-surgery soreness, but more pain was NOT what I had in mind.
That is so bizarre. Sorry to hear that.
Holy shit, Choco. I'm sorry for your friend.
[size=1]But between her and your neighbor with 1000 plagues, have you considered maybe you're bad luck to be around? [/Oh I kid, I kid, I'm going to hell I know][/size]
Glad you said it, fobs, so I didn't have to. Scoot over in that handbasket.
Thanks, guys. It has me pretty shaken up. I mean, it's that thing that is cited as being so statistically improbable. "You're more likely to get struck by lightning than to.... !"
She wasn't a very close friend, but I can't imagine the grief her family must be feeling to have their loved one stolen from them in such a freak accident, so suddenly and without warning.
Here's the Daily Mail's write up.[size=1]But between her and your neighbor with 1000 plagues, have you considered maybe you're bad luck to be around? [/Oh I kid, I kid, I'm going to hell I know][/size]
[SIZE="1"]I'm just hoping I'm not next.[/SIZE] :worried:
Lots of crappy news here. I hope things start looking up for all concerned.
Thanks, guys. It has me pretty shaken up. I mean, it's that thing that is cited as being so statistically improbable. "You're more likely to get struck by lightning than to.... !"
She wasn't a very close friend, but I can't imagine the grief her family must be feeling to have their loved one stolen from them in such a freak accident, so suddenly and without warning.
Here's the Daily Mail's write up.
I did some research on that claim because I had always heard the same thing.
Well, it seems you are VERY likely to be struck by lightning if you are outside, in the open during a lightning storm. Not as much if you are indoors.
There are also a bunch of different types of lightning strikes with varying degrees of fatality and causing your bones to EXPLODE.
So, yeah. Lightning, better not to be struck by it.
Grand Canyon sees a lot of lightning deaths. Not only are you outside, but everyone is standing at these overlooks that are basically lightning strike zones because they are jutting out into the air. And many of them are leaning up against the metal railings for a better view.
Our local newspaper has a weekly question. This week it was:
What are the top reasons for being stopped by Lake Oswego police ?
The LO Police Dept Spokesman gave 7 reasons... none of which included my
Reason #8:..being Hispanic and white driving a pick-up, or driving a pick-up, or being Hispanic.
.
A bit frustrated that my wife came out of a meeting with the head of her small company with a decline for any pay raise now or in the future. Her salary as well as the other senior level employees was essentially capped 5 years ago when the owner decided they were all making enough money and would only offer bonuses based on sales income to the company. With a rising cost of living for everyday things we find ourselves earning less than 5 years ago and the paycheck barely covers things some months. She had argued this as well as his plan to sell the company and share in the profits all seems to have gone by the wayside when he and his wife came into some wealth; selling the company is no longer a priority for him. Bonuses are nice but aren't something you can use to plan for retirement or even paying for a new car! It just seems wrong but as my wife is 60+ her options are limited for changing employers. And it is frustrating that even when she excels on projects and makes the company look good that her bonus is based on how sales are going. Oh well, better than being unemployed.
Oh well, better than being unemployed.
I hate that this saying is the new reality.
I hate that this saying is the new reality.
Indeed. It's only marginally better than "Brother, can you spare a dime?"
Dazza earns a pretty good living, but we're flat out covering the bills lately either. It's very hard with all the brats hanging around too. I guess we all just have to soldier on and cut costs where we can and try and think of little things to do to save (or make) a little extra.
It upsets me too. Sorry you just have to suck it up Chris.
Dear Minnesota
I'm not sorry about ur nutball.
If I had any gumption, I'd put that in the HOF. srsly.
Oh well, better than being unemployed.
Although it is accurate, it does suck. Sorry.
They say bad things come in threes. Third thing just arrived.
A neighbor/family friend passed away after a battle with cancer last week. She was a mother of three, and was like a second mother for my brother. She was such a good person.
Too much loss and suffering, this week.
I'm sorry, Choco. Such a hard week ... these things seem to happen close together. I hope you are able to take the time you need to grieve. With a small child, I know how hard that is. Try to carve out some quiet time.
My mom is sick. We don't have all the details yet but I am honestly sure that the only thing that's holding me up is promising I would be strong for her. I'm not doing well. I've never known a better woman than my mom, or a better man than my dad, or better family all around. This isn't about me. I know this. I'm helpless. I know this.
If I let go, if I let this out, I may not come back from it. So I am doing everything I can.
I don't want pity or even sympathy...it all seems so goddam irrelevent. Like how in the fuck is the world still even fucking spinning? Nothing else, not one other thing, matters on earth.
If promising to be strong for her is what keeps you going, then that's what you should focus on. She would not want you to be a wreck, so don't be one, for her sake.
Thanks Clodfobble. I know you are right. I am trying to be strong for how strong my parents have always been for me.
Not able to post new thread. It says new users are not allowed to do so until they are confirmed not to be spam. Well, I am not new, though this ID is new :D
Guess, I am back after all those years and nothing much has seemingly changed. I will search my lovely posts and put them back :D
so you still don't find the cellar to be what you need it to be...is that what you're saying? and this upsets you, hence this thread? so why are you back...hopes of more betterer fulfillment? :D
I thought I must have been one heck of a brainy guy here and that you people must have missed me a tons. But then I know that's just like poking insult at cellar-ites.
Was just loafering around the net and popped this link at random. Memories came flooding back!
Maybe it was a bit premature, but this dude was clearly a troll, and I'm pretty sure he's MysticRhythm who Bruce banned years ago.
oh. i don't know that person. i was sure it was the merc.
*placing post on the ground, stepping away from the post, slowly*
Today I am upset that my oil drain plug was installed so tight that I am unable to remove it with a socket and ratchet.
There was also a guy named mystic ... something. ryder maybe?
Seemed OK. Why the short leash on the ban? Did something happen in another thread?
My Mac keeps shutting down with no warning. I don't know what to do other than take it to the shop. GRRRRR!!!
My brain still doesn't work, post-chemo. I have to use all sorts of coping mechanisms to remember everything I have to do/take with me in the morning/do before or after work. It terrifies me. I don't know what type of work to go for next year, or even if I'll be able to work.
And my older sister calls to moan about how badly off our parents are. I know, I know. I'm visiting my father at the end of this month and my mother, I don't know when. None of my sibs ever bother. Older sis recently made the effort for the first time in ten years, so now she's all in a tiz. I've seen both of the 'rents far, far more. But her moaning is upsetting.
I will be up at 3 am for the next two or three days, to get my academic work done. These days, a little voice in the back of my mind asks, why? I'll probably have mets show up on my July scan. Then I'll wonder why I did all of this.
No you wont and no you wont. Everything is going to be fine. After everything you've been through, I think it's ok to expect a little slipping in the mind for a while (mind you, I don't really think there's anything wrong with your brain considering the marks you've been getting), so stop stressing about stuff and just give yourself a break. Get on with things and stop worrying about what might be. xxx
Thanks Ali, I try to calm down and do Zen breathing every time I can. But when I forget all of my books, my case files, and my meds in smalltown and have to scramble to get meds etc. for the week - and have to make lists upon lists and then still forget things, and am too exhausted by 7 pm to do the required 4 hours of academic work, but still can't sleep ... I get to the point where I don't feel like I'll ever be normal again. I spent almost two hours tonight trying to book flights to see my father and didn't, because there were so many variables and I don't trust young pilots in small planes (how ironic, I'm the one who shouldn't care), and I ended up deciding to drive. Although based on my last long trip that may not be a great idea. But at least, if a fatal accident occurs, I'll be in control. And no, I won't kill anyone else.
I keep pulling academic stuff off and it reassures me but something deeper is wrong. However ... it'll make itself unquestionably felt when it's ready. It may be that, before that time comes, i'll have other things to worry about.
I don't mean to come off as a drama queen. I just have a deep, gnawing feeling that something is far wrong.
From my perspective, you're life has been totally fucked up for a couple of years and you've proved to be smart and resilient. I wonder, since you are much more knowledgeable than the average bear about cancer/chemo, if you're subconsciously being nagged by what could have been, rather than what was/is? Like your head was ready for the worst case scenario, and still not convinced it won't happen. Does that make any sense?
It does make sense, Bruce. I'm very relieved that it wasn't the worst case scenario, definitely. The trouble with breast cancer is that it's more a chronic disease than anything else. You don't get pronounced 'cured' at five years, you're in remission but you're never cured. Your risk of recurrence goes down at that point but recurrences or mets still happen as long as twenty, twenty-six years later. The sooner a recurrence occurs, the worse the outlook, so counting off the first five years does lead to a big sigh of relief. But it tends to come back at some point.
I'm not worried about that right now, though. My post-chemo head-to-toe scan is in July, and I'd be extremely surprised if something showed up. I totally expect to be NED (no evidence of disease). It's this chemo brain that's getting me down. I worry that it won't go away, worry about how it'll affect my work and life. But worry never solved anything, so I have to practice more Zen breathing.
I'm upset by my computer, it is down it keeps shuting off after about 30 seconds. I am pissed at Apple this thing cost $2,000.00, 3 years ago since it has gotten a new cooling fan $125.00, hard drive $500.00, and now it has a software problem, I hope. If it costs more than $200.00 we will get a new PC. I don't have the money for a new computer. I am at the Library using a 'puter. "BALLS."
I switched off apple and onto PCs in 2006. Still have the same PC, no repairs except replaced one DVD burner. Still a pretty decent machine, speedwise. I think I paid about $1300 with a monitor and a pair of decent speakers.
Hm, I've had great luck with apples. We even have an old rounded Mac, the kind that came out in colors, from - I don't know, 1996? It still works and runs the kids' educational software I bought then (that was some of the best stuff ever -Treasure Mountain, Treasure Cove, Super Solvers, Dorling-Kindersley programs, Operation Neptune, GeoSafari, Carmen Sandiego).
I digress. We also have 2 mammoth PC laptops and a tower or two that just won't die. There's always a use for them.
I'm in the Travelodge at Hounslow (London) having spent a fairly fruitless day at the archives. I've basically spent half of what I had left to do this trip (2 days) and it may just be a total fucking waste.
I came down yesterday evening, with plans to get out really early and get to the archives before they opened....
I got up in time, had a good breakfast and was out the hotel by 8:45. Not quite early enough to beat the 9am opening, but plenty time to get there for 10...not bad.
Got halfway to fucking Kew and realised I'd left my sodding camera at the hotel. Had to go all the way back and get it. Didn't get to the archives until nearly midday...realised my card expired a couple of months back and had to reregister (another 20 mins). By the time I'd booked my table, searched for and ordered some records it was gone 1pm. Then a 45 minute wait until the first records were delivered to me.
They've changed the catalogue search system. It's shit. Much harder to navigate imo. And what I thought would be a straightforward search for a set of courts martial records turned into bollocks: rather than a volume of transcribed trials (easily photographed and showing complete records) like the ones I had for the 1790s, the ones for 1813-1825 are just boxes of individual trial papers...small, difficult to manouevre for photographing, half of them are damaged beyond reading, and the ones that aren't are barely relevant to my work. - still photographed them though in case I can make sense of them when I can zoom in.
Left the archives just before they closed, having pre-ordered some docs for tomorrow. Given up on the general courts martial, gonna try and find some regimental courts martial in the individual regimental returns.
Of course tomorrow it's normal opening hours (shuts at 5) instead of the long opening day that I managed to waste. (closed at 7)
So...was feeling glum. It's all piled up on me a bit. Money has more or less run out and I currently have zero income. Gonna put in a claim this week (now that uni is officially over - though I will still be working on my PhD as a 'write up year'
Rent is overdue, dog needs vet stuff, etc etc. Claiming for housing benefit means getting in touch with the landlord which means them coming round, which means I have to try and rescue the shitpile that used to be their house. Which reminds me: Thanks for chewing the fuck out of everything Carrot, that really makes life easy.
And then....on the way home from the Archive one of the veneers on my front teeth split and half of it came away. Front and centre, looking good huh?
Which means a fuckoff big dentists bill to deal with it.
How I managed to hold back the tears on the subway I don;t know. I really felt like I was going. I just wanted to sit down and sob and not care what anybody thought.
I dunno. I think I may be due ya know? Like, expecting a visit from the stomach cramps fairy. This stuff doesn't usually make me cry.
Anways. Got back to the hotel, dumped the laptop and camera etc and went off looking for a late chemist. Yey for ASDA! Bought an emergency dental repair kit and glued the fucker back in. Yeah, well. We'll see if it stays. Am half expecting to wake up with it gone and swallowed. Which would be a pain.
There. That's my rant done. Thanks for listening dwellarpeeps. I feel a bit better for offloading :P
[eta] oh yeah, forgot to mention my broadband at home is off. Th phone went down completely for a few days then they fixed that but now the broadband doesn't work.
That is one bad day. Sorry Dana, what a crapload to fall on you all at once. Offload as much of it as you want. I hope tomorrow improves.
Oh Dana. Oh hon, that's the shits.
Glad you twigged on to gluing the fucker back in yourself. That's all the dentist does anyway.
Sucky day, Dana. Sorry to hear. :(
Thanks all. :) I've woken up feelin a lot brighter this morning. I think possibly because I'll be heading home after the archives this evening.
Back to my Carrotchops and my beloved Pennine hills. Hurrah;)
Update: I'll preface this by saying I had a much better day at the archives today, found loads of stuff (had to cherry pick 'cause of time and really wish I'd stumbled on that vein yesterday! But got enough that the trip was worthwhile) and got myself to kings cross station 1 1/2 hours before train was due to leave...
Bloody good job I did! My lovely, straight through, no changes train to Halifax was cancelled. Had to get an earlier train to leeds... which itself had to stop en route for a while and ended up 45 mins late.
Original train would have got me to Halifax for 10:30 where mum would pick me up (with carrot!). It's now 10:46 and I'm on a train from leeds to Halifax ... Due to arrive at 11:15 where I shall get a taxi (no carrot) having suggested to Ma that she and the dogs shut up shop and go to bed (there was a high chance we'd miss this connection and I'd have been getting back at nearly midnight at that point).
How's that for an end to this trip? Lol
What a shitty experience all round.
Sorry to hear about it.
The words cherry and vein leapt out at me from your original post and I thought, "Oh noes!" but in fact is was worse than my recent experiences anyway :(
Dads had another hospital visit today. Seems like every week. John Radcliffe (Oxford) specialise in head/ brain injuries. Todays diagnosis is not dementia, not epilepsy, not auto-immune disorder but some some of damage to the brain which could have been caused some time ago.
He has to go into the JR for four days. They want to put him on a drip and monitor him.
ASAP.
No beds available at present, wait for a phone call.
I need to convince Mum I am sober and get them to rent a car for me to drive.
The JR is nearly two hours by public transport, she can't be doing that every day, and it's not fair on Dad to be left alone that long.
I've no idea how good they are there, but Mum won't want to risk it given his poor hearing - he'll just smile and nod. If I knew they were like Addenbrooke's I'd just try to reassure Mum that he was in the best place. If they're anything like Stoke Mandeville I'd suggest she booked a B&B and went in to look after him herself. Like they did in debtors' prisons back in Dickens' time.
Sadness.
My lead singer Johnny O took a spill down a flight of stairs. Broke four ribs and hit his head. His brain didn't swell up so that's good, but he's still in hospital 10 days later with low sodium levels.
ten days? that seems like a long time for broken ribs. is there other stuff going on? I admit I don't know much about your clue regarding his low sodium levels.
I wish him the best. get well, soon if possible.
Sorry to hear that, UT. Hope he starts getting better soon!
Best wishes to Sundae's Dad and Johnny O.
Hope it's not inappropriate, but I'm pretty sure there's a blues song in this:
My lead singer Johnny O took a spill down a flight of stairs. Broke four ribs and hit his head. His brain didn't swell up so that's good, but he's still in hospital 10 days later with low sodium levels.
Bit of repetition, a few, "I saiyd"s, guitar line with some syncopated minor thirds ...
Hope it's not inappropriate, but I'm pretty sure there's a blues song in this:
There is a natural rhythm there !
ten days? that seems like a long time for broken ribs. is there other stuff going on?
Apparently brain trauma can cause low sodium, when the body's total water content increases but the sodium level stays the same.
ah.
I would imagine that if he's receiving hydration in the hospital, they'd give him something balanced like "gatorade" or "saline" (honestly, I don't know what the actual stuff is) but I get your dilution illustration. if they can give him water, it would seem as though they could just as easily add the necessary sodium at the same time.
dude, not a doctor. not bustin your chops. just.. when I've been in the hospital, I have questions, and your post triggered that. I am not interrogating you, I'm just reacting to my own memories of my own experiences.
I sincerely hope for your friend's speedy recovery. Brain injuries are deadly fucking serious and I have little sense of humor about the subject.
Diabetes Insipidus
is most likely what he has. My son dealt with it as well.
There is medication for it, but it can be tricky to get the dosage proper. Every brain injury is different. Age/weight/health are also key factors with all this...
Hope all works out well for him. :(
Visited him in hospital today. He said that he went into a phase where he was speaking nonsense a few days ago. ("How did they know?" I asked. John is a pretty wacky guy when "normal".) He also now has a condition where his right foot bends down at the ankle and he can't bend it back up.
Thats called "foot drop" been there too. Thats caused by a loss of brain signal. Sounds like he suffered a Diffuse Axonal Injury (DAI), not just a Blunt Force Trauma. What hospital is he in?
As for the talking none sense. They are REALLY tricky in things they say to elicit certain responses. Brain injury patients are getting "tested" all the time.
He's at Christiana, although we don't know why since he lives in Norristown.
I have an incredible tooth ache that started on Thursday as a mild discomfort and by Friday afternoon was getting worse. I called my dentist only to find out they close on Friday at noon. The tooth is one of my old wisdom teeth that was left in some 40 years ago as it and the one above it came in straight. Well, something is wrong and yesterday I had to resort to taking hydrocodone left over from some past surgery. Now I'm having coffee trying to shake off the grogginess of the pain med. and waiting for 8 am when my dentist opens.
hope you're ok to drive and you get the first appointment, chris
thanks for the informative link classic.
good luck to your friend UT.
That is odd, UT. I would have thought of several others... Wait where did the accident happen? Was he in DE?
Saw my dentist yesterday in the late afternoon when he had an opening and after getting an xray (rather hard for a wisdom tooth when it hurts to open your jaw wide enough to get the film plate back there) he said the tooth's nerve is infected and the infection has spread to the tissue surrounding the roots. He prescribed a strong antibiotic and some more hydrocodine. Said the pain and swelling should go down within 24 hours. After the infection is gone he will pull the tooth as it isn't worth doing a root canal on a wisdom tooth, I had 2 that were left in 40 years ago as they came in without incident unlike the other 2. I hate taking hydrocodene during the day so will try to just get by with over the counter pain meds today. :yeldead:
Jeez Chris, sorry. I'm glad he was able to fit you in and there's a plan.
The accident happened in his house in Norristown. His sister lives in DE and she was the one who went and got him, so we can only assume she figured she knew the best hospital for him, and carted him down there.
He doesn't remember the accident, only that he woke up in his living room in pain.
We had to come home early from our trip cause we all got sick. I am still trying to cough up my lungs. Oh well. Shit like that happens. We saw family, but no snow and no zoo. :(
I'm sorry Ali. I had high hopes for you guys and your road trip.
Getting sick on a road trip is horrid. Sorry you had to cut it short, Ali.
get well soon Ali, and your kiddos too.
Thanks guys. I am very upset about it. I feel like it might have been tge last chance for a hol with both the big boys. There are some ruminations about trying the trip again in september hols, so we will see how that goes.
Aww, bummer. Couple of days bed rest all round.
Well, still a bit sore in the back of my mouth but early morning Wednesday my tooth was hurting so much I called back my dentist. He said it sounded like the infection was worse than he could see in the Xray and I probably needed to see an orthodontic surgeon. He recommended several but being the day before the 4th of July it was hard to find one who would fit me in. Finally saw one in the early afternoon who after yet another xray said I needed to have the tooth removed immediately. He and his team did surgery and it was out in 30 minutes and I don't know what they put in their anesthesia but I saw all kinds of bright colors and pretty things.
Spent the 4th taking it easy and had a post op check today and some kind of drainage tube removed. Cleared to fly to Seattle on Monday which is good. He said I had a severe abscess and that the infection left unattended would have caused all kinds of problems.
Glad you're on the mend!
Say hello to Seattle for me, willya?
Mum called about an hour and a half ago to tell me she'd found out that Martin and Jen were at the hospital with our Sophie (youngest niece, 15 years old) with suspected broken wrist from a cheerleading fall. Just heard from her again: they've plastered her up, but they may have to transfer her to Huddersfield, remove the cast and operate. Not sure why. Maybe a really bad or complex break?
Anyway. Feeling very sorry for Sophie and also my bro and SiL. What a horrible way to spend a night. Poor bloody kid.
We've all been worried something like this might happen. There've been other kids in the squad/team(?) who've been hurt and she's had a few near misses herself.
Recently she's been getting into dancing as well, and blew everyone away with her performance at a show last week. So, we've all been quietly hoping the cheerleading would be naturally pushed aside by the dancing.
Small mercies: she finished her exams this week. Given it's her right hand, this could have really screwed up this round of exams and that would have been a shame, because she's worked really hard.
Kaiser just opened a huge, brand spanking new, facility on the west side of PDX.
A pre-op waiting room is just outside the door to the Fracture/Cast clinic.
The wall-art is an expanse of "designer" skate-boards, and there
is a loop-TV running about the need for kids to wear helmets, etc.
A well targeted audience...
Ah Dana, that's rough.
I mean all kids break something (I had to wait until I was 17 and it really annoyed me) but to have the added worry that it's something more is awful for her, you and the family.
Like you say, the shilling in the shit is that she got through her exams first.
My thoughts to you, and extended to those I only know through you.
It was the CIA Dana... every 4th of July they sent an agent to olde blighty to break some random kids wrist. :cool:
Uh-oh. Hope you like living in Ecuador, Bruce...
Argh.
Today dad decided he wanted to change his name to Three-Fingered Pete.
He had a good old try anyway.
Turns out he "modified" the hedge-trimmer with a couple of pieces of gaffer tape, effectively bypassing the safety cut-off. Then held the business end.
Lots of blood.
Lots and lots of blood. Off to A&E for a fun afternoon in the waiting room.
Mum is pretty good with blood and didn't even bother to disturb me because she thought I was asleep (?!) In fact I had the curtains drawn to reduce the glare of the sun and any sound was drowned out by the fan going full pelt, and Richard Bacon interviewing Derren Brown on the radio.
She'd already found the time to clean up most of the blood and write me an uber-casual note before I wandered out during a news break to get a drink from the fridge. At that point they were just waiting for the taxi.
One finger was just badly gashed.
The other had a proper lump gouged out of it and the Doctor said, "Mr Robinson, I think you have been very lucky today." There was talk that he may have nicked a vein and they were intending to keep him in under observation because they couldn't stop the bleeding. In the end, about four hours after the accident they let him go home.
In the mean time I was a good girl.
Brought in the washing, remade the bed in the spare room, washed the cushion Dad had bled all over, hunted down the spots and spatters Mum had missed, put away the gardening tools - including the strimmer of death - watered the garden and started dinner. Worrying all the while. She did call me from the hospital, but she didn't want to leave him alone to make calls as he might have been called in without her.
Poor old Mum.
She has to shower him for a week as he's not allowed to get the bandages wet. Which would be quite sexy if they were 40 years younger, but I think will lead to much frustration and shouting these days. She'll hate having to be up close and personal in a hot bathroom; she can barely tolerate her own showers when the weather's like this. And no, our peculiar shower does not allow you to change the temperature.
They have to go pick up a blood monitoring system for Dad tomorrow, while he is on the high doses of steroids. "I should have collected some today," she said, "he spread enough of it about." Given that it's an 09.00 appointment I expect she'll feel she has to get up at about 05.00 to get everything done in time.
Still. He still has all the digits he was born with, and it least it was his right hand (being a southpaw.)
Wow, Sundae. Glad it wasn't worse, but that sounds pretty bad as it is.
Sundae, can't your dad just put a plastic bag over it and secure the bag with a rubber band for showering? That's what my dad did when he pruned a couple of his fingers with the mower. Not very sexy, but perfectly serviceable.
Wow. Rough one for Dad. He is a regular guy, eh? We always pull shit like that and usually get away with it. Give him our best.
a string trimmer?
or
a hedge trimmer?
metal blades moving opposite each other in a scissoring motion?
or
a string(s) moving in a circle at very high speed?
either way, OUCH MOTHERFUCKING OUCH!
Wow, Sundae. Very glad he didn't lose a finger (or two.) And after he just left the hospital a few days ago, too. Do you think this was just macho DIY and a lesson learned, or is the impaired decision-making a side effect of his recent neurological troubles? He's lucky to have such caring women in his life.
As for me, did I say I had severe flu? Apparently, I meant meningitis. Still waiting on official cultures to determine whether it's viral or bacterial, but they've already started the aggressive IV antibiotics, because if it's bacterial they can't afford to wait even a day. On the one hand, spinal tap says it's likely bacterial (low glucose, high protein,) but on the other, everyone's telling me that it just can't be bacterial, because after 5 days of it I should have been dead already. One nurse here told me I should go back to the two clinics that brushed me off earlier in the week, and threaten to sue until they comp my prior visit. :rolleyes:
comp??!!
Don't you have a series of orthodontia appointments to cover? or a new lease on a new mazda people mover or some damn thing?
take no prisoners.
My dad had meningitis when i was a baby. He nearly died. Get better soon clod. Xxx
Sundae, I'm sorry about your dad's fingers.
Clod - whoa! Hope you feel better soon! Sounds intense.
Clod, OMG. Talk about really going for it! Much, much sympathy, you must be feeling like hell whichever flavour you have.
All the best from me. Don't listen to Spinal Tap, they'll tell you it's flu ramped up to 11.
Big V, it was one with blades moving in opposite directions.
Sigh.
The shouting and swearing didn't wait until this morning.
I woke up to a crashbangwallop in the early hours of the morning - Dad had missed the final step in going downstairs to let the cat out.
Mysteriously, he was going downstairs with a torch, rather than put the light on.
Now I do this. Because the landing light shines directly onto Mum in the spare room, and it seems unfair to wake her up just because I can't sleep. But Dad never does. I know because the landing light also shines directly onto my bed and wakes me up when he lets Mia out.
Anyway. F-bomb dropped numerous times. Mum threatening to leave him. Hoping he bled to death etc etc.
I know her fury masks fear and love, because this morning she has been nice as pie to him.
Even nicer than pie. Nice as a small bit of pie with a lovely cheeseboard.
Ali - I did wonder about why Dad can't bag his hand up in the shower.
I suspect it's because Mum doesn't trust him not to use it.
I think he should bag it up anyway - he claims he's only using his left hand but I caught him out twice already using both. For a start when he was pulling out the recycling bins which are collected today. "I'll do that, Dad!" Nope, he couldn't wait for me to put my flip flops on. He was halfway up the path with it... Men!
Clod, OMG. Talk about really going for it! Much, much sympathy, you must be feeling like hell whichever flavour you have.
Oh I was, but not anymore. Now I have morphine. Percocets and Vicodins didn't even make a dent, but morphine is my new best friend.
Eat lots of fibre and drink lots of water, and make friends with senna! Morphine will stop your pipes up nicely if you're not careful.
Clod I hope you mend soon. You should make a video for us of your thoughts and observations just after your hit of morphine kicks in. I remember the inch was hilarious when he got some M for his broken leg.
And as for what V said, yeah, you don't have to sue the clinic. That's why god invented lawyers. Ask around for a great PI lawyer. They do all the work and you get 2/3 of the judgement. Mini-van? Hell, how about no more mortgage or a couple of solid college funds? Take this shit seriously and create a paper trail.
Wow, Clod, that's scary. I'm glad it was finally diagnosed properly. I hope you get better soon.
They're 99% sure that it's viral now, maybe even West Nile, but caution dictates that I stay on my antibiotic regimen and watch the culture at least until tomorrow to be certain. Beyond that, I'm not infectious unless I'm swapping blood, and I can go home as soon as the pain can be controlled with something less than IV drugs. The infectious disease doctor said she would expect Thursday at the earliest, but you never know, I might pull it off by Wednesday.
But Thursday would mean another day of rest for your body and soul. ;)
is that the overachiever in you talking, or the overdeveloped immune system turning the corner on this assault with the help from the IV cavalry?
it's no matter, what I really want to say is stay in the hospital as long as it takes for you to be well, even if it's boring/irritating/keeping you from your life of leisure on the outside. Please.
But Thursday would mean another day of rest for your body and soul. ;)
Rest for my body, yes; soul, not so much. My kids basically haven't seen me in four days, and they can't come visit here because the little one is already upset enough knowing that I'm ill, seeing me in a hospital and then having to leave me here would make it much worse for her. Meanwhile Mr. Clod is doing his best caring for four kids by himself while also working from home because he already took all of last week off, but it's not what he's used to and he's already given them the wrong meds a couple of times. Obviously if I can't do it, I can't do it. But if I can do it, I need to be doing it as soon as possible.
As for me, did I say I had severe flu? Apparently, I meant meningitis. Still waiting on official cultures to determine whether it's viral or bacterial, but they've already started the aggressive IV antibiotics, because if it's bacterial they can't afford to wait even a day. On the one hand, spinal tap says it's likely bacterial (low glucose, high protein,) but on the other, everyone's telling me that it just can't be bacterial, because after 5 days of it I should have been dead already. One nurse here told me I should go back to the two clinics that brushed me off earlier in the week, and threaten to sue until they comp my prior visit. :rolleyes:
Um. Holy Crap!
the wrong meds?
I have no beef with Mr Clodfobble, but wtf? You
(nevermind. just nevermind.)
Please get well.
It's not his fault. The kids take around a dozen meds each, with only two overlapping between them. I have all that information in my head. Which kind of fish oil belongs to which kid? Why does this kid get 5000 IU of vitamin D per day, but the other one only gets 2000? One med is given to Child A only on Friday mornings, while another is given to Child B only on days 15-21 of each month. Another med used to be taken by both of them for years, but recent lab results allowed us to take one kid off... I actually keep a spreadsheet on my laptop that I try to keep updated, you know, in case I get hit by a bus or something, but it was about a month out of date. He knows all the important prescriptions, no major mistakes have ever been made.
snip--
you know, in case I get hit by a bus or something,
--snip
This is what was in my head after the word "you" in my post.
I have dealt with complicated medicine schedules, I know it can be hard to follow, a moving target. And of all the parents whose (mis)behavior I judge out loud, you and he are not on that list, not members of that universe.
I stand by my first plea, get well soon.
Aye, will do. The nurse let me try stepping down to the oral pain meds, and so far they're holding up quite well. A little pressure behind my eyes still, but on the other hand I'm neither itchy nor dizzy like I am on the morphine. I think tomorrow morning's looking good.
Get better soon, Clod. Best wishes.
Itchy means they gave you too much or too often, you want to be just on this side of itchy.
Oh my. Please take care of YOU Clod. You cannot care for anyone else without...
Oh don't worry, I'm home now and almost back to 100%. Off the pain pills as of last night, though I'm being good and still laying down to rest on a regular basis. They say the fatigue could last for weeks or even months.
Stay rested clod, let yourself recover.
I'm still amazed that any germ on Earth was silly enough to pick a fight with Clodfobble's Brain.
I'd wanted to start a brand new thread about this, called "Shit that is annoying the fuck out of you", but I can't figure out how to do it via forum app.
An old cow orker of mine works for Walmart. She just posted on FB, they had seven people walk out with groceries without paying tonight.
We'd worked together back in the '80s, and I remember her as a tough, no-nonsense kind of woman who was for the people. But fucking Walmart seems to have taken its toll. Today, she says to the grocery stealers, because of you, prices will go up.
Of all retailers, Walmart is able to take these kinds of hits.
I dunno that I agree with that kind of thinking, Blue.
That's like saying it's okay to key someone's car, as long as it's a Merc. Because you know, they can afford it.
Honest people already pay a shoplifting surcharge. Seems wrong to think we want to pay any more. And yes, I do count myself as honest. I've only deliberately shoplifted as a teen, sneaking pick & mix sweets up my sleeve as well as putting them into the bag I was paying for. I'll admit to times as an adult where I've not owned up to a mistake by a shopkeeper or cashier. But I've felt bad about it (because that, like, helps...)
I feel for people who can't afford to eat. I've been near that in the past. Not living here and not while posting on the Cellar. But were these people honestly starving, or were they freeloading?
Oh and while I'm at it - mothers, you know you are going to a supermarket.
You know you have a child.
Feed it BEFORE you get there.
Don't hand over an empty packet to the cashier all smug because you weren't stealing after all. And yes, those grapes and cherries ARE stolen, because no-one weighs your child.
We never got fed when we were out shopping. We had three meals a day at set times. And no, it didn't stop me getting fat, and my bro is a bit porky these days, but my ex-sister is rail thin; evidence you make your own choices when you grow up.
Gosh, I've come across really harsh today haven't I?
I think I'll kick Diz downstairs now, just to get a hat-trick.
Even if they want to "stick it to the man" they aren't, they are sticking it to their neighbors. The walton family won't be stuck, they'll adjust as needed to maintain their margins.
Lower wages, higher markup, squeezing suppliers, leaning on municipalities for tax breaks and incentives.
People are too stupid for their own good.
Major slip up on the budget on my part. Thought we were breaking even -- somehow the second credit card was in my blind spot to the tune of four digits. :( Argh. Feeling like a major idiot right now. Live and learn, I guess -- we're still adjusting to having one income and belatedly adjusting our spending habits.
Over here it's cheaper to take out a bank loan to pay off the credit, if you can.
Sent by thought transference
My daughter turns 21 this coming Saturday. She emailed awhile ago to say that she has plans out in Colorado and won't be home. But she would greatly appreciate some money as her gift, because she resigned one job and now has only one job left, in retail (bridal gowns). She is still engaged to Ghostbuster/Samurai/Fraudulent SSI Boy.
I contact her to keep communication open so that she knows she has somewhere to go when she wakes up to the fact that her fiance isn't particularly connected with reality and is potentially dangerous.
It is what it is, but so horribly not what I'd hoped for her. I mean, this guy told her that he never drinks because he's former Special Ops and his body is a lethal weapon registered with the US Government. Sounds like the used car salesman in True Lies. It's so upsetting.
Having a hard time tonight. So sick of being sick. That is all.
I've been thinking about you Ortho. Even when I'm not on the computer. I hope that brings a little light to your thoughts. Of course, I'm not the only one either, so maybe even a ray of sunshine. xxx I hope you can have a good rest and feel a bit better in the morning.
Thank you, Ali. It's late here and I have to be up in 5 hours and sleep isn't going to happen, but I'm trying to rest. I admit I'm apprehensive about my upcoming scan, but everyone in my family is maxed out with stress and I can't add to that. Especially when it's a 'don't borrow trouble' sort of thing, except the trouble is already here.
I hope you're recovering from the illness that brought you home early. Hope you're feeling better. xxx
Having a hard time tonight. So sick of being sick. That is all.
Just say "Fuck it; I'm not sick". Any treatment that makes you sick or miserable is out the door, jack. I have found great contentment in no longer worrying about my lesions & tumors.
Don't worry, be happy!!! Ignorance is bliss.
Embrace your future son-in-law. Become his best buddy. Then you can slip him something that shouldn't show up on autopsy. BTW, maybe we can introduce my son to your daughter? Hmmmm
A few years back, one of my clients came in and I was telling her that my Mom was at the hospital, and we were frantically rushing abut to get support for her. My Mom on the other hand, was so sure she'd get the best care because she'd paid taxes all her life and therefore she was 'special' and was entitled to it. This client looks at me and says "Lisa, we're all special" Never took people for granted after that.
“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection”
― Gautama Buddha
Fucking stupid bastard internet.
Still barely functioning. Six weeks, 5 engineers and now it's back with BT fault management to identify where the problem lies.
Yesterday they altered the signal to noise ratio...instead of helping it made it worse. No idea if this post will even go through. Most of my attempts at posting don't these days. Can't stream anything. Can't download anything. barely able to access the cellar or emails. Most attempts at sending an email fail.
yesterday, during the few minutes at a time when the connection is working, it was registering speeds of 0.33 mbps. Since they altered the signal to noise ratio that's dropped to 0.11 mbps.
Did a ping test last week and was getting 9 or 10 request timeouts per 5 minutes.
Six fucking weeks. Feeling very cut off from the world.
At one point, after a four day period of no internet at all (one of many) the engineer managed to get it 'working' and the first thing that happened after he left was my computer shutting down and on rebooting being locked out by a ransomware virus because my anti-virus/malware software can't update. It was such a bad one I couldn;t even boot up in Safe Mode with command prompt. Took the computer shop 2 full days to figure out a way in. Cost: £60
And because I can't really use the internet for my work here, I now have to travel into Uni and use the postgrad study room a couple of times a week. - that's a four hour round trip and costs between £5 and £7 depending on whether I go by bus or train. Instead of spending £5 a month travelling to my supervision meetings, I'm spending £40 a month to be able to work.
No point my changing supplier: I've been back and forth between Talktal;k and BT and haven;t noticed much of a difference in quality. Out in the sticks, with old wiring and a small overcrowded exchange: that would be the same regardless of hwo I went with. Not getting caught in a 12 month contract with a higher bill for no improvement.
Just....I dunno man I am just feeling so low right now.
[eta] bloody hell it posted!
I feel you pain. I really do, we had such shit internet, too. What's the mobile signal like where you are? Is it worth getting a usp mobile dongle for your PC?
Unfortunately the mobile signal in my house is virtually non existant. I can sometime get a signal in the bedroom or if i stand near the front door, but usually lose signal midcall. I generally have o walk about outside to get enough of a signal to use it.
Most of the club calves we sell for the 4-H kids to show go for about 2k last fall we sold what we considered a late born for about $900. They were told he was iffy whether he would be fat enough by fair time, these people said we just want a steer. We clipped it for the fair this past week.
These same people bought a heifer from someone else and it is structurally unsound. These people want us to breed their heifer. These are the type of people that blame their mistakes on other people. i.e. if this heifer cannot walk when she is 9 months pregnant or if she need to be c sectioned I am sure it will be our fault because we bred it to the wrong bull!!! :rolleyes:
We told them we are not interested in breeding this heifer I am sure they are now totally pissed. At the fair last week they never even spoke to us!!! :eyebrow:
At the fair last week they never even spoke to us!!! :eyebrow:
It's virtually impossible to avoid this type of people entirely, and still run a business. You know you did the right thing. :thumb:
You bet Bruce I think I was not clear that they never spoke to us last week but asked us this week to breed this heifer ...REALLY?
Another rant I bought a stove from Sears they sent it to the nearest Sears home store. These are run by local Mom and Pops. When the stove came in I asked if they could put in the LP conversion. Oh yes the kit is already in the stove. So we pick up the stove get it out of the box and umm no its not converted. hmmm well it can't be that hard to do so I read the instructions and its says to take out the screw in the top of the burners...
They are f ing magnesium and disintegrate. After two of those we load up the stove and bring it back and ask them to do the conversion[they said they did in the first place] Ok we can do that and good thing you did not do it yourself because you need a magnetic socket because the pieces could fall in the stove!!! OK [the pieces are brass] :rolleyes:
Anyway I leave it there 4 days later they call and say they are missing a piece maybe I have it in the instructions I took home. {4 days?] Ok so (I look and find the piece still being nice thru my gritted teeth.) They will have it done the next day. 3 days later they call and say its done. :mad2:
I go in to pick it up and I asked for the fittings they took off. She hands me the card the others came on and one is missing. Oh she says the technician DROPPED IT IN THE STOVE. After telling me I could have done the very same thing because I did not know enough, their professional dropped it in there? WTF super → :mad2:
Then they tell me "Mr Goodwrench" will send me a replacement , keep in mind he is a sub contractor to this store so yah I did not believe that crap. What the hell ever happened to customer service?
Everything. Too much to do, too much at stake, too little time, too little support, too little alternative :(
Left my car windows cracked a little yesterday. A damn small, shit filled bird got in.
Oh damn, that sucks! Did it get out again before you got back to the car?
Everything. Too much to do, too much at stake, too little time, too little support, too little alternative :(
Yup. Know how you feel.
Sent by thought transference
Oh damn, that sucks! Did it get out again before you got back to the car?
No I let all windows down and it bailed out. But left some nice things inside, not
I've gone public all week with my super-short hair - on this trip to the midwest, this symposium where no one knows me and I can be myself and shine. And I hate my short hair, i HATE it. It looks like - not me. I feel old, I feel like some person I don't recognize.
I had short hair until late high school when I defied my mother and grew it. After being utterly ignored by the opposite sex, suddenly at the beginning of college I became worthy of interest. That continued as long as I had long, or longish, hair.
So I understand the source of the insecurity, and it's not necessarily valid. But the fact remains, I hate having short hair in spite of its practical advantages. Right now I just want to put that wig back on until my hair is as long as it used to be. Not really feasible, but it's upsetting me. One of those non-scientific non-quantifiable not-logical stupid things that affect probably all of us, not just those of us with two X chromosomes.
Sorry to hear that insecurity has got you by the short hairs.
All of my hairs are short right now, so ... yeah. I do have some awesome assets. But when insecurity sets in, the hairs are short.
Noticed the AC was not cooling our house properly yesterday and the tech just came out and found a bad capacitor. Not too upsetting as the unit is 7 years old and AC units in Houston run harder than in many other parts of the country and this kind of part repair is like tires or brakes on a car. Still it will be $390 for the parts and labor. Oh well today is my birthday so I guess I got a capacitor as a present! :rolleyes:
Happy birthday! Here's to keeping cool!
Totally bummed out. I was in the VA hospital again this week. Someone stole my cellphone and billfold while I was out of the room. I hope I get a replacement phone today. Worse than anything, I stood up BusterB for a meet & greet in Hattiesburg.
Oh yeah, I have to return to VA outpatient on Wednesday. Fun, Fun, Fun!
Ah Sarge.
There are some arseholes in this world.
So sorry to hear that - how much did you lose? I know it's not about that but maybe we could chip in to replace it? Restore your faith in strangers?
I know Buster will understand, although I'd love to see a pic of you two together.
Keep your chin up darlin', we respect you even if random arseholes don't.
I lost less than $20 in cash. It is simply the headache of getting a new driver's license, military ID, debit card, and Military Star card re-issued. Plus, I lost all of my phone contents. Sigh. Plus I spent 4 days/3 nights in a crappy hospital ward dealing with migraine/cluster headaches.
It could be worse, I'm just royally inconvenienced
Shitty thing to happen, Sarge. *hugs*
That really is the lowest of low things to happen, Sarge. I'm sorry you have to go through all this hassle.
Someone stole stuff from guy in a veterans' hospital???
What a cunt*.
That is all.
* Really, this is an insult to actual cunts, which have warmth and depth, can give pleasure, and bring life into the world. Come to think of it, cunt should be our highest compliment. This perp was an anti-cunt.
Thank goodness the identity thieves didn't get his Cellar password ... or DID they? :eyebrow:
Someone stole stuff from guy in a veterans' hospital???
What a cunt*.
That is all.
* Really, this is an insult to actual cunts, which have warmth and depth, can give pleasure, and bring life into the world. Come to think of it, cunt should be our highest compliment. This perp was an anti-cunt.
No ... cunt is a pejorative intolerable four-letter word that is the antithesis of a woman who gives pleasure, receives pleasure, and brings life into the world. Just my perspective, but I find this word the worst insult, which is the reason I reacted so strongly to Ibby calling everyone a cunt at the slightest provocation, or hell, non-provocation.
I appreciate the thought behind your post, Zen, and respect you for it ... but that word, thrown out there as a pejorative, isn't redeemable in my opinion.
I agree, it is an offensive word
Well, FWIW, it doesn't bother me. Not to take away from how it makes you feel, ortho and limeg, you certainly are entitled to your own reactions, and many others would agree with you. But to me, words are really just words.
For me it depends on the venom with which it is said.
When people spit it out as if it's the vilest possible ephitet in the world then I worry about the misogynist overtones.
Nothing Zen has written in any of his posts suggests this in his case; in fact he went further and questioned even his own use.
I use it myself when I want to use a really bad swear, as we said as teenagers.
I'm not sure I've ever said it audibly in company, polite or otherwise. This is probably not true, but it would have been used humorously.
When I used to stack shelves there were a good few brands of poorly designed shampoo bottles which would fall over if you so much as breathed on them, taking out all their pals so you had to redo a whole section. They got a whole litany of bad swears muttered at them.
They say it a lot more in England imo, it's weird what is considered what level of offensive between us.
I would never say P*ki any longer, even though it's considered completely inoffensive in the US; and n*gger is offensive in the US and how offensive is it in Britain?
N*gger is very offensive.
Black teens/ young men use it between themselves, but it's verboten in other situations.
I don't use the term Eskimo, preferring Inuit.
If I explain to people that it not considered polite they get a bit huffy and start muttering about "PC gone mad" under their breaths. But why use a word if you know it causes offence?
(Oh, ditto Jap, after it was flagged as rude here on the Cellar).
I am quite amused by this thread derailment.
There does seem to be a niche for the phrase "silly cunt" which seems much less offensive.
Ortho, I'm sorry that you feel bad about your hair. I, like others, think you look absolutely cute with your short. However, if you feel awful with your short hair, by all means wear a wig if that'll make you feel happier. Like I always say, what's important is how you feel and not what others think, even if it's a positive opinion. Wear that wig and be happy. :)
I don't use the term Eskimo, preferring Inuit.
If I explain to people that it not considered polite they get a bit huffy and start muttering about "PC gone mad" under their breaths. But why use a word if you know it causes offence?
How often do you actually use the term Inuit? Just curious, like.
I've met a few part-Eskimos, but never a part-Inuit. Well never one that introduced themselves as such, anyway.
For some reason, the fact that they're 'not really Eskimos but rather Inuit' has properly taken hold over here. Using the word Eskimo instead of Inuit kind of marks someone out as being a bit old fashioned and unaware.
I have no idea why this is, given we're not exactly overflowing with people of Inuit descent, but I would feel slightly uncomfortable with the word Eskimo. It may be to do with the growing cultural awareness of our imperialist past.
From Big Sarge's wallet to British Imperialism as it relates to Eskimo in less than 20 posts ... :lol:
How often do you actually use the term Inuit? Just curious, like.
I've met a few part-Eskimos, but never a part-Inuit. Well never one that introduced themselves as such, anyway.
:lol: I very nearly wrote, "Not that I've met any"!
Perhaps it's because of a history of British Polar expeditions...?
Although my interest lies more in the uninhabited Antarctic.
I'd be stumped as to whether Pygmy is cuturally acceptable for example, because it's not something I have read up on..
I'd be stumped as to whether Pygmy is culturally acceptable for example, because it's not something I have read up on..
:eyebrow: :lol:
;)
Although the "up" wasn't intentional.
Canadians only use the term Inuit or Inuktitut because the Canadian indigenous arctic peoples all fall within that group. I gather that Americans use the term 'Eskimo' because the Yupik, who are one of the indigenous groups in Alaska, don't identify as Inuit. The broader term is therefore used.
Heh... You give us waaaay too much credit, ortho. I don't know a single American who knows those tribal nuances, or even that there's anything other than Inuit. We say "Eskimo" because that's what our parents and grandparents said.
Meanwhile, my kids have to keep reminding me that their seated position is called "criss cross applesauce," not "Indian style." Someday I will be their old racist relative, and they'll apologize for me by saying, "she grew up in a different world, you know?"
hehehe. We all end up out of date eventually:P
I still occasionally have to stop myself saying 'halfcaste' instead of mixed race, because that's what we said when I was growing up.
Likewise 'gypped' for ripped off, which I still use sometimes without thinking.
Now if we can get those Hispanics and Latinos to stop calling us "Gringos"
Meanwhile, my kids have to keep reminding me that their seated position is called "criss cross applesauce," not "Indian style."
For real??
Well, I understand phasing out "Indian style", but what's wrong with "cross-legged"? Why not "lotus position". (Hm, actually, I can see why not, because yoga = SATANISM ... In some states.)
But ... "applesauce"? Uh?
But ... "applesauce"? Uh?
Because it's a more acceptable rhyme for kids than: "Criss, Cross, Show your [COLOR="White"] moss[/COLOR]"
:bolt:
I wasn't sure what thread to put this in, mainly because I'm half pissed off and half upset. Not sure if I'm sliding into a depression or what, but I just don't feel good about anything much lately. I'm irritated with my husband. He just doesn't seem to get that he's required to actually participate in the family that he wanted to have. Also, that I need some time to myself now and then, and a bit more often than one night out with friends in about 6 months. I'm am tired and worn out. I've been pretty sick for ages and I am not getting the support I need.
I'm just sick and tired of pretty much everything right now. Life is not good. :(
eta: You don't have to say anything. I just need to vent a bit or I'm going to go ape shit on someone soon.
I can relate-my husband works for 'the phone company' and works 6, 8 days in a row with 1 off. I've had to do all the yard work and house work by myself, plus meals, groceries etc. I'm glad its summer, or I'd be in a depression also. When he's off he's in bed, or running around to the bank doing his own business. There's lots of stress there because we don't get to sit down together and talk, or have a meal because he's on the road. I try and see the good in all this; I can do what I want when I want to do it, I can eat kd whenever, play the stereo full blast, talk on the phone with my friends for hours, take a nap without being disturbed. Yet it does get lonely having only the 2 cats to talk to.
We have 4 kids lime. Thats my biggest gripe, and he spends all his spare time fishing, while i stay home with the kids.
I've just about had enough to be honest.
Tomorrow is the anniversary of my diagnostic mammogram and biopsy. Even though I got the pathology results on August 2, July 31 was the day I really knew. It was unmistakeable on imaging. I didn't think I'd care, other than to give a fist pump for getting through the year ... but I'm surprised at how low I feel tonight.
No wonder ortho. Its not like you're celebrating something good is it? Maybe better to focus on something else instead?
Yes, I thought that being on Mackinac Island would be a great diversion, and it is definitely beautiful. It's just tonight ... I'm sure I'll do better tomorrow.
I'm sorry things are tough at home, Ali. I hope your husband has an 'ah ha!' moment sooner rather than later.
just ignore it the best you can. Not all anniversaries need noting or celebrating. acknowledge the shittiness when it creeps up, thenremember the "out and clear" and carry on as normal. Maybe take a copy of your recent NFSAM*/whatever results to the bathroom mirror as a reminder that it's done and not worth losing a day moping over.
*Not Fucking Sick Any More
For real??
Well, I understand phasing out "Indian style", but what's wrong with "cross-legged"? Why not "lotus position". (Hm, actually, I can see why not, because yoga = SATANISM ... In some states.)
But ... "applesauce"? Uh?
Hmm....I must seem racist as heck. Don't see what's wrong with the term "Indian style." But I've been hearing and using the term lotus style more often these days. By the way, yoga = satanism???!!!???? For real???????????? I need to to follow current events more. :rolleyes:
Gotta have a Plan B. When we're on the outs, I call a couple of girlfriends and we hash out what we're going to do. then I tell the man when I'm going, and with whom. Say what you mean-mean what you say-but don't be mean when you say it. Explain that 'this is my time' Use your imagination, what would make you feel yourself again? Campouts? Bungee jumping? Rock climbing? Laying about on a beach somewhere... the world is your oyster! The house won't fall apart with you gone a couple of days, and your man will have his chance to grow closer to his kids-everybody wins
All good in theory lime, but my real life is not like that. I will work it out. As i said, i just need to vent for now.
You can dump on me, Ali. Really, I can take it. ;)
EXTRA! EXTRA! READ ALL ABOUT IT!
XoB can take a dump.
You know Bruce, i once had a guy ask me to pee on him and said no, and i didnt even like him as much as i like you. ;)
I'm pretty sure Bruce can take the piss, too. ;)
The upsetting you thread is not usually this amusing.
Walking Carrot about an hour ago, I'd stopped at the kerb, waiting to cross the road, with carrot sitting next to me, and a car went past. A lad in his early 20s or thereabouts, stuck his head through the window and yelled at me in an angry tone: whos fucking walking who?
I smiled first, because people have said that to me before when Carrot's been pulling and it's a bit of a common joke amongst dogwalkers.
It was a second or so later i realised he'd just called me a dog.
Ffs. I'm old enough to be that lad's mum.
Just getting over a really bad eczema flare and today was first day in weeks I was feeling quite happy about how I look.
Sorry Dana. :( People are horrible.
Oh Dana, some people don't like seeing happy people (even when your 'happy' is hanging by a thread anyway) and like to derail you. Similar thing happened to me the other day. It's bitter jealousy, pure and simple.
thougI tend to think he may have really just been commenting on the dog's rambunctious nature.
you are awesomdon't let assholes derail you. nt
i
His comment reveals everything about him, and nothing about you. Pity him. The pain he must feel inside that he's going around lashing out at complete strangers for no reason. Lashing out from the safety of his moving car as he drives away. He's a worthless coward. Don't let somebody that pathetic into your head. Give his words no value. We know you are awesome. You know you're awesome. That's all that matters.
fuck.
His comment reveals everything about him, and nothing about you. Pity him. The pain he must feel inside that he's going around lashing out at complete strangers for no reason. Lashing out from the safety of his moving car as he drives away. He's a worthless coward. Don't let somebody that pathetic into your head. Give his words no value. We know you are awesome. You know you're awesome. That's all that matters.
... and then picture him with his head out the window, looking back at you laughing his last as the driver clips the apex of the next turn and splashes his head against the telephone pole like a summer squash against a cricket bat.
at least he died happy.
sigh--
thougI tend to think he may have really just been commenting on the dog's rambunctious nature.
--sigh
this is what I really think though.
1) Put Carrot on your left side wrap his lead around your bum and hold the lead in your right hand. Walk... Whenever he pulls stop walking. Start again telling him to heel. Every time he pulls stop walking. He will get the picture.
2) That idiot probably meant no such thing. How could he? You are fabulous! :)
It's no more personal than if you were the cashier in a bank when he pointed a gun at you and said "put all the cash in the bag, bitch". Not worth your time to pity. Also not worth dwelling over. Easier said than done.
I don't think you do know you're awesome. If you did, it wouldn't have bothered you so much. But Carrot knows you are. and Sundae and Limey and J and the entire interwebs........ eventually we will tell you often enough that you might start to believe it.
I thought you preferred dogs to humans anyway? ;)
The VA is upsetting me today. I have been waiting for a year for my decision, they keep telling me that it only takes 270 days. When I tell them how long it has taken they say that due to the sequester things are running slow. I have tried to call them every day for the last week, and after going thru thier automated system they tell me to call back after hours and set up a time for them to call me back. They never call. And I waste my time waiting for the idiots to call me back. FUCK THE GOVERNMENT!!!
Thanks guys. You made me feel much better. Doesn't usually bother me when random strangers call me a dog or an ugly bitch - usually I just laugh it off. It was just the timing of it that made this one get to me I think. I'd only just got my head out of the eczema blues.
maybe he'd just been dumped by his girlfriend eh? :p
Re: Carrot's rambuctious nature (omg love that word, I shall make an effort to use it more often ;p) - he wasn't pulling at all, that's how I know it wasn't meant in that way (well, that and the expression of disgust on the lad's face and the aggressive tone of his voice) he was sat quietly at my side as we waited to cross the road.
He doesn't often pull on the lead, actually. There's a handful of specific places and contexts where he'll pull, but he walks beautifully on the lead most of the time. But, yeah, 'Vana, that's exactly the method to do it. Though, it never got through to Pilau. he only stopped pulling the lead when he got too old and frail to do so...mind you he had problems with the outdoors. Pulled so much and so consistently that he did my elbow in ;p Hence I was frikkin determined we would not be having a repeat of that problem with Carrotchops :)
The VA is upsetting me today. I have been waiting for a year for my decision, they keep telling me that it only takes 270 days. When I tell them how long it has taken they say that due to the sequester things are running slow. I have tried to call them every day for the last week, and after going thru thier automated system they tell me to call back after hours and set up a time for them to call me back. They never call. And I waste my time waiting for the idiots to call me back. FUCK THE GOVERNMENT!!!
That totally fucking sucks, fargon. I saw a thing on the Daily Show about the delays in VA claims and I was quite shocked. They were saying there are basically piles and piles of paper claims unprocessed and two different computer systems that can't talk to each other. Is your claim snarled up in that nightmare?
crossing fingers and toes they sort it out soon.
Fargon, maybe we need you vets to get booths next to the military recruiters at high schools across the country. They give their sales pitch and then you tell the kids what to expect after they serve... bastards.
the backlog of paper claims is so physically vast that it threatens the structure of the warehouses that store them.
There is more work to be done than can be done by the people and resources that have been allocated to it by those that make such decisions.
These priorities reflect the influence of the constituents. BY THEIR ACTIONS, it is clear to me, despite their cries to the contrary, that our veterans matter little to the decision makers in our government. fucking disgusting.
granted, the problem is enormous. but so are the stakes for each individual, like fargon.
it pisses me off.
Soldiers matter a great deal. But former soldiers seemingly matter very little.
Fargon,
My VA claim was opened in Sep of 2008. My deployment in 2009 caused my claim to be closed. It was reopened in July of 2012 and I can't see the end of the tunnel yet. My meds are routinely late or not mailed at all. Now they are billing me for office visits & meds.
The only way to fix this is to go a couple of times a month to the regional office handling your claim and speak with a representative. Check your ebenefits status online daily. Finally contact your congressman to have your claim followed up.
Good luck. It is a long road.
Christ, it shouldn't be so difficult.
Can you say? Thanks for affirmative action.
Dana and fargon, I'm sorry I missed your posts - have been traveling since early this morning. Glad you're feeling better, Dana - what a pathetic specimen of humanity that guy is. And, fargon - I can't believe the way vets are treated, with all the pride and hoopla and support for the military - this is horrible. I feel terrible for you and for Sarge, and others in the same situation.
Got a phone call early this morning from my stepson. Turns out his wife was at a meeting for a group she volunteer for and after the meeting she and some others decided to grab a bite and continue discussing some issues. After the meal she and another lady were on their way out to their cars and talking as they got ready to depart. A car pulled up with 3-4 guys, the drive asked for directions. My daughter in law who is very helpful walked towards the car to help and that is when the driver pulled out a pistol and robbed both of them! Drove off with their purses.
She was pretty shook up and after calling her husband (luckily had her phone and keys in her pocket) they dealt with the police, etc. The police said there had been 3 other stickups in the area, probably the same guys and they had fired a shot at one woman who ran, missed her but still!
Crazy world.
ho-lee crapola.
I'm glad she's safe. there's no rational defense against an ambush robbery like this. I'm glad she's safe, and sorry about her losses and her psychic injuries. damn.
Can you say? Thanks for affirmative action.
Ok, "thanks for affirmative action".
but I don't understand why that's pertinent.
Whoa! Glad to hear she's safe -- how frightening!
I'm so glad they just took the purses and left. How terrifying!
Horrible. I'm glad they're safe, chris.
Good move, phone and keys in pocket, C-4 and remote receiver in purse. :reaper:
This issues is half way between upsetting me and pissing me off.
As you know, Maverick has been seeing the same girl for a year or so now, and everything was pretty hunky dory till a couple of months ago. She has some issues from her past which she really needs to address, and these issues lead to some pretty obsessive and clingy behaviour towards Mav.
Now, this girl is Mav's first 'real' girlfriend. Things got pretty serious pretty quickly between them, and basically she's a nice girl, but she's just not that much of a thinker. Education is not high on her list of things to do. I've tried every way I can think of to encourage her to get the help she needs in the form of counselling and possibly medication, but there's only so much I can do and the situation was getting a bit beyond what I considered my realm of responsibility, so I went to her father with it all. Seemingly he was on board and felt that the suggestions I had were pertinent and that he'd take over and I wouldn't have to worry any more.
Anyway, that has not been the case, and yesterday (which happened to be her 18th birthday) things came to a head and she and I had quite an argument. she started yelling at me and I told her to leave the house if she couldn't address me in a respectful manner. She said that she and Mav would be fine if everyone would just leave them alone, which speaks to the heart of the issue. Mav has basically cut himself off from all his friends from school and sport. The only person he actually spends time with is her. He's fallen behind in some of his schooling and is pretty much becoming someone I don't actually like very much. So, I told them no more seeing each other during the week. she can come over one night for dinner, but needs to be gone by 9pm. They can spend time together on the weekends like normal young couples, but they both need to start spending time following their own interests without having to do everything together.
Of course, now I am the enemy as far as she's concerned and Mav is stuck in between her and the rest of his family.
My vision here is that she gets her shit together and everyone can be happy again, or she continues on the same way until eventually she loses hiim or we do. My only consolation in it is that I hope Mav will wake up to what's going on here before she ends up pregnant, cause that's my greatest fear. That he's going to tied to a woman who is lovely as long as she's getting everything her own way, but if she doesn't, she turns into a bunny boiler.
Scary days ahead. :(
Ouch. Thats a difficult one to deal with. Hope it works out, honey.
Ah Ali. Daughters or sons it's young pregnancies that many parents fear.
At least forward-thinking parents.
I can't imagine ever rowing with any of my teen BF's Mums. Good FSM, the only one who wouldn't have lamped me one was so genteel that I think she peed rosewater.
The only thing which can't be changed is what you fear - a baby at this age.
And yes of course I get that because we went through it all with Abs. Three times if you count the twins as two.
Anything else can be resolved in time. Education can be picked up (many mature students here), family relationships can be rebuilt, even a prison sentence isn't actually a death sentence - well, not in Aus.
It must be bloody hard to live through though. Seeing it from the outside doesn't take into account any of your emotions.
All I can suggest is to remember she is still a child in some ways.
Because she is young and because she has emotional/ mental health (?) issues.
Good luck.
I know it's so hard when you have years more experience than either of them, and you can see young people making mistakes that are so easy to fix if only they would listen. On the other hand, I would really encourage you not to burn bridges or make ultimatums. She's technically an adult, and your ability to control either of them is rapidly dwindling.
Maybe not a pleasant thing to think about, but this girl might not only end up having your first grandchild, but perhaps being your daughter-in-law as well. I know for sure my mother-in-law regrets a lot of things she said to me before she realized I'd be a permanent fixture in her life.
Well, the main thing I'm trying to do is advocate for Mav. He actually wants more time to himself, but he doesn't speak up for himself because she goes off her tree when he suggests she not come over etc. By 'off her tree' I mean she cries and yells and accuses him of not loving her etc.
Anyway, I've been telling mav for some time now that he needs to grow a set of balls and tell her how it is for him. I think he's finally realised what a mistake he's made by not doing so. There's a lot of tension between her family and ours now, to the point where Aden is actually looking over his shoulder because he thinks her brothers are going to come beat him up. (Aden and Kate don't see eye to eye on much. Mostly Aden doesn't like how she treats his brother, and Kate hates the fact that Aden stands up to her)
Anyway, I've asked Mav to take some time out over the next week or so and start to really weigh up whether or not this is the sort of relationship/family he wants to be involved with. I've pointed out to him that if she doesn't change her way of thinking, what's he's dealing with now is what he's got to look forward to for the rest of his life with her. I've cautioned him about wearing condoms etc and explained my fears. He's been quite open with me about the fact that he sees my point and agrees with most of what I am saying. Daryl and Aden have both told him what they think too, which has been helpful in some ways. Not so much in others. Basically though, his relationship is affecting the whole family adversely and something has to change. I just hope it's all for the better.
:sniff: A friend had vascular surgery for the second time in so many months. He did not make it through the surgery. He died yesterday. This was not heart surgery they were placing a stent in his back because of circulatory problems in his legs.
This is one of the things people can look forward to if they have been smoking for 30+ years and IMO its so preventable. I will miss him
I am reminded of the old Yul Brenner commercial he did right before he died when he said "Whatever you do don't smoke"
Missing Trilby, today.
And in a different way, missing ZenGum, too.
I miss Zen too. He was the only other regular aussie poster, and i dont even call myself regular anymore. :/
Missing Trilby, today.
"Saw" her in (one of the) poetry threads today. Hit me really hard.
Had a cry.
Not to say I don't miss Zen.
But my alcohol counsellor doesn't know anything about him, unlike Bri.
I am sure the spirit of Trilby will linger here eternally. She is at peace. Remember that when the sadness takes you. Xxx
Yesterday I made a number of simple calculation errors (boss thinks I'm an idiot) and had a series of muscle spasms. It turns out I had a blood sugar in the range of 30-50 mg/dl. I don't know why this happened or how my doctor was out today and had to see a PA. Now I'm supposed to take a bunch of supplements that MIGHT help, we don't know. But if this muscle spasm issue continues I'm going to have to change fields. At least it probably isn't MS.
Fuckety fuck fuck.
Dads is at the JR today. The hospital that told him he didn't have Alzheimers or epilepsy or the other things I can't remember he was diagnosed with.
Oops! Their bad!
They've changed their minds as the massive doses of steroids haven't done anything other than make him more unstable and more confused.
Yes it is dementia.
Yes the diagnosis of encephalitis still stands.
But now we're adding Parkinson's to the list.
It's a right old party in Dad's body.
Nice to know that when someone is shaking themself apart they still have to endure the stress of a 1.5 hour bus journey...
Sundae, I am so sorry. Parkinson's is notoriously hard to diagnose, even though it seems to have a couple of glaringly obvious symptoms ... My mum had it. Correctly identified and treated may symptoms subside, for a while at least. Hugs to you and your family x
Today:
Mom is in the hospital. How long? Who knows? Is she just worn out from chemo and radiation? Who knows? Is she going to get better? Probably not. Do any of the 284 parts of the medical community who are treating her have any idea what anyone else is doing? Seems not.
I'm sick as fuck from Effexor withdrawal, having failed to come up with 400 bucks (thought it might come from my ass, but nothing but the shits.)
I walk like a drunk. I have the 'wooWOOwooWoo" feeling I always associated with some cartoon dog coming off an LSD trip. I shouldn't be driving, but what are you gonna do? But trying to act normal because no one gives a flying shit about that (nor should they) in the face of what we're dealing with with mom.
I'm angry and sick. No way to deal with what is going on, for sure.
And the mouth breather next to me here at the library obviously doesn't understand what "TYPING" is and the sounds that emanate from a KEYBOARD when someone knows how to do something besides feed their fucking cow in FarmFuckLand.
Have I whined enough? Good. Thanks for listening.
But I just can't tell you how much it means to me that my friends here care. Really. Oh thank you.
Now you can get back to crying for the usual suspects. I'll be fine. Really.
I hope things get better for you, Shawnee. Sorry they are bad now.
Oh, they will get better. There ain't nothing to it.
But I do thank you glatt for being you. You're the best person here, imho.
Infi - I'm sorry you're having such a hard time. Effexor withdrawal is certainly teh suxxor. How dreadful to have to suffer that at a time like this. Hugs xxx
thanks limey.
I'm sorry I'm so angry. Effexor withdrawal is really awful. I thoguht I coudl do it, stay home and get through it somehow. But I can't stay home because I need to be helping.
So I'm sorry folks, I'm a total mess; suddenly I'm the 'strong one' who would've thunk and I am barely capable of taking mcare of me. And I am truly in a bad bad spot. I wouldn't wish thsi on anyone. :(
I hope you can find some support (and hugs) locally, infi. x
God, Inf. Sounds like a nightmare. Wish there was something I could do to help/ Alls I got is a virtual hug *hug*.
Your poor dad, Sundae. :(
Many hugs for you, infi. I'm sorry you're going through so much simultaneously.
@ Sundae: sorry, honey hadn't seen your posting about your dad til now. What a bastard having that journey either side of the hospital.
Hopefully now they've got a firm(er) diagnosis they'll be able to get him on better meds and you'll see an improvement.
*hugs*
(Carrot was going to give you a nibbly kiss, but he saw Diz and got distracted :p)
@Sundae ... I'm sorry to hear about how things have gone with your Dad. Steroids won't help any of that ... and Parkinson's can be very difficult to pin down. I'm just sorry you and he and your Mum have to endure all the bus trips and runaround, and sorry that things are going poorly. Hugs.
@Infi ... I'm very sorry to hear that your mother isn't doing well, and you're enduring Effexor withdrawal ... not to be wished on anyone. I don't have access to personal Internet time during the day, so I'm sorry to be late with this ... but do wish you better things on all fronts. Hugs.
Both the families that we dog-sit for have lost their dogs. We have no more foster dogs. It makes me sad.
Hugs and prayers to everybody.
I was gonna vent, but my problems ain't shit.
My best to you all.
Sundae, so sorry about ur dad. Whats the plan now?
Im, i dont know.what effexor does, but why are you off it? Is it just a finance thing? If so, maybe this community can help? I would if i knew where to send it. I could western union some dosh if you need it.
thanks peeps.
I'm feeling better so far this morning. hope it continues. Horror stories on the interwebz indicate i have a long road...but everyone is different.
Ali, it's an SSRI...has been extremely effective for me for years. When i had my 19th Nervous Breakdown in the spring, they upped my dosage one again. i'm on almost the highest dosage prescribed. I've always known that just missing one day can make me sick. I'm cold turkey now yes, because of losing my job and subsequntly my insurance and it's very expensive. But i should have some money coming soon, and i will then decide if I'm through the woods (I hope) or if i will just go back on the damn stuff and taper off with doc's care.
I really reaaly appreciate the kind offer of moola but i really really don't want anyone doing that and i would not feel right accepting it. I am indebted to many, and indebted in many ways ('good' debt and bad) and i couldn't bear accepting that sort of help. But it's very kind of you to offer.
Mom is home again. I haven't checked in yet this morning. Perhaps this is a bad time to be enduring withdrawal but I'm playing this one day at a time.
Again, thanks everyone. I was a ball of hysteria yesterday. Just google 'effexor withdrawal" and you'll get a ore complete picture of how insidious this is. The extremely short half life is partly to blame...and other SSRIs do not 'replace' to help because the withdrawal has very little to do with the seratonin issue.
I mean, what about when the apocalypse comes? I'm supposed to fight zombies in this state? i can't just 'assume' the zombies won't loot all the drugstore, and my energied would better be used for combat and hiding and the like...not trying to find the nearest CVS. My druthers are to quit it for good. If my depression kixks my ass again there may be newer treatments i haven't yet tried.
Sorry Infi, just come across your family woes and withdrawal issues.
Yours is heavier shit than mine.
I wish everything good for your Mum. And glad to hear she's home
And goodness, even more good for you.
It must feel fucking hard right now.
But you are so much stronger than you give yourself credit for and you are a fighter. I hope it's not too terrifying; I found just changing medication like being on a deckchair on the Titanic.
Keep breathing.
Thanks for the kind words people.
I have detox to look forward to (as of Friday) but at least Dad only has outpatient appointments at present.
Though as I said the journeys are really getting them down.
We're leaving much of our thinking until the 'rents come back from holiday.
It's hard, because Mum gets so angry with Dad.
And I side with him because she can be so vicious. But he loves her. And she does love him.
It's her learned reaction to attack when she is upset/ frustrated/ out of her depth/ under stress. So it's a sign that she's probably suffering more than he is.
My learned response is to feel sick at confrontation and to hide away...
Anyway. My detox is all about me, but my parents' health is not.
I think I've finally come up against something that lottery-dreaming can't fix.
fucking fuckety fuck IM. Do your best.
If things get ridiculous go to the E.R. Tell them you can't pay a dime.
IM, the offer is there if you need it. Despite what you may think, i am a compassionate person and dont like to see others suffer.
Sundae: my situation is no 'better' or 'worse' than yours. We all go through different crap. In fact, we are both worried about our own health while worrying about loved ones' health. It freaking sucks, I know.
I know I can't help unless I feel better.
Soooo...I did finally get my retirement money. This doesn't mean I'm retired, of course, just that I can get my affairs in order and start back at Square One. I'm really good at Square One. I do my best work in Square One. But I don't think I'll do much with Square One until I get back on the med and THEN get with my doctor and come up with a taper off plan. I seem to feel better in the mornings and it gets worse as the day goes on. I'll think I feel pretty content one minute and the next I'm bawling my eyes out. A good indicator: I was happy coming into the library then saw some of the townswomen, all glorious in scarves and jewelry and the ever-important cell phone to their ear, who can't even find their way around this LIBRARY which is a freaking work of art in itself and I mumbled "what is it, pretentious snot bitch day at the library?"
Yeah, that's not nice.
I'll have access to more of the money tomorrow, but I want to get my script broken into one month instead of 3, paying ~400 as opposed to ~1100, then go to lower doses which will also lower the cost. I want off this stuff. I can't believe there isn't much more than the thousands of online forum postings in the way of warning of the severe withdrawal. No, this ain't like stopping prozac or paxil or any of the other freaking SSRIs I've tried over the years. This is potential suicide-inducing, with the very extreme mood swings and the physical impairments. I'm a bit angry with the doctors. Maybe it's my mission to get this information out there. I could be like one of those cool people you read about in Reader's Digest: How I Bucked Big Pharm Before it Bucked Anyone Else.
Ali, I know you're compassionate. We may not have always seen eye to eye but I know you do reach out to people. I don't know if you meant the universal 'you' or if you meant 'me' but believe me your offer touched me. And I appreciate that about you.
And, thanks everyone. Just venting did a world of good, for one thing giving me a reminder of just how bad I can get in this state.
I'm glad you got some money and are going to get the meds you need. I hope you feel better soon.
Infi and Sundae - one day at a time. You're both far stronger that you give yourselves credit for.
You are each an inspiration for others in a tight fix, as to how to just knuckle down and chip away, minute by minute if necessary and drawing on all the resources at your disposal - not least venting to your pals here.
Attagurlz! xx
You're so kind. Thanks. *hug**
Sundae, we shall heed the word of Limey because as you know (much better than I, even) she is one of the good ones on earth. :)
One of the good and wise ones. :)
That's really sucky. I'm sorry.
Dentistry sucks.
Dental problems are a nightmare. But this ... they actually injured your face trying to get hardware off? I'm sorry, IM.
Why can't I get a fucking break.
I don't know.
But the answer I think we're supposed to give is to focus on the positive. Count your blessings. That sort of thing. I think that can help, if you really try it. It's sort of like a meditation.
It's easy to forget the good stuff because you take it for granted. You love your nieces, right? They are a huge positive in your life. You're fortunate to have them. That's just an example. You would know better than I would what your positives are, I can't do this exercise for you. Focus on the positives and take your mind off the shit. Hard to do with a throbbing mouth, so tell me to screw off if it helps.
...like the freak that I look like.
There's a freak running around that looks like you?:o
Chin up, and all that shit. This will pass.
Hell, Infi, I been freaky-looking for 45 yrs.
Feel better.
Hug.
Wish I could help you with your load. ...
I would usually advise focusing on the present, but with it being tooth hurty right now...... I got nuthin.
Hug.
Yeah. .. that's all I got. I guess you have to do something about that tooth first, so....um..... just handle that one thing first.
THanks guys. Deleted my posts because...well it doesn't matter because why because then I am just doing what I was told I was doing when I posted about it in the first place. Not by you. Just...eh, never mind all that.
This too shall pass. Thanks for your concern. Kind words and virtual hugs are nice.
L---
Infi - whatever it was, I hope it's getting better now!
I'm no fan of sterilisation.
(Well only as a knee-jerk reaction) but surely some women can have contrceptive implants. Can't think of an equivalent temporary measure for men.
We just had the court case of a woman who starved her four year old to death and hid the corpse in his cotbed under the squalor she lived in. His body was dressed in clothes intended for a six month old baby. Said clothes bore signs of maggot infestation.
And no, not a postpartem story in this case, just the tragic case of a woman completely unsuitable to reroduce
Amanda Hutton had eight children, most in Care or with relatives.
She was an alcoholic and drug addict.
She spent her own childhood in Care and lived an extremely chaotic lifestyle.
She had been a victim of serious domestic violence and was known to the police.
When she was arrested she was so drunk she couldn't stand up and looked like she would be sick when she tried to speak. There were flies on her clothes.
Her son never saw a GP and was eventually struck off the list for failing to keep appointments.
She refused to let Health Visitors into the house.
Her son did not turn up for school and was eventually unregistered.
There is a tabloid-scramble for blame of course, but EIGHT CHILDREN raised in squalor at some point in their lives?
We're not talking a clown car, we're talking a gumball machine.
Wish I could help you with your load. ...
Uh...you could help
me with
my load...;)
I'm cold.
Not proper cold than can be warmed up, but weird skin-cold which refuses to shift, all goosebumps and unexpected shivers.
Diz is ill and now on a 24 hour fast. If I had anywhere else I could go for 24 I would
I can't drink, I don't want to eat.
Only good thing is Mum is out most of today, so I don't have her to deal with, although she seems okay right now.
When she's gone Dad will start mooching around doing his own thing, so I'll go watch some TV. And maybe put some gloves on. And maybe boil my beans for dinner tonight.
And make some lists for whet I want and need, as incentives, starting with upping my overtime for Christmas.
No real problems, apart from Diz. Just down.
Maybe you#re coming down with something. Have a cup of tea. That should help warm you at least.
I have had a bad day today. Not going in to details right now, but the final straw for me was being away for the day and gettiny a text message telling me eva has started walking. When i waent there. :'(
Oh ... crap. Hugs, Ali. :hug:
Today I am not happy becos I have not seen my Nellie at all today not even in the park or in the car.
I do not know why I have not seen my Nellie. I wish I saw my Nellie.
[Dana's note: Nelle had her dew claws removed today.
:)
I hope Carrot gets to see Nellie very soon. Nellie also misses Carrot, I'm sure.
This was so cute I had to respond. Love to the doggies!
Friends who ghost you once you have cancer.
Yeah. But teh Cellar's got your back. X
Sent by thought transference
ortho - they are probably jealous. look at you! you beat cancer and come away a very sexy nymph. I just love your hair. plus, look at all you accomplished with your training while sicker than a dog.
Thanks, limey and Sarge. Teh Cellar really does have my back.
Wouldn't say it if I didn't mean it
Venting Steam Please Step Carefully
Little AA fella in my room, short hand: came to me with no impulse control, Dad in prison, and very angry. He's having a good morning despite the Milkies and Chinamen. His tantrums are coming under control. He's earning stickers most intervals and occasionally dipping into the prize vault. The ESL teacher who, imho, hates boys [strike]with special needs[/strike] called saying she wouldn't be in to teach today, but needs to come in to talk to my TA and UPK co-teacher. I could see the little guy was getting jumpy so per discussions with OT I rolled him up in a leaded blanket like a burrito and rolled him around the room. The phone rings. I have to take the call. I tell the little man to go to circle and he actually does. ESL comes in he hops up goes to her and asks, "Can I have a hug?" She gives him her "warmest" "No! Go back to your seat and sit down! Boy is balling, tears rolling down his cheeks buries himself in his cubbie which is by my phone. Long story short his good day goes to shit. Why was she in my room?, you might ask. She came to pull my TA into a side room and warn her that the new boys we're getting are horrible! Gee, I was at the meeting bitch, that's why they're being placed in the behavior classroom with people who like kids and have a little patience. A mighty [SIZE="7"]Fuck You[/SIZE] to you.
thank you for the moment of vent
....
I second your emotion.
....
when you talk about the burrito therapy, you mean, you swaddle him, like I did for infant SonofV? I know it worked well on him, back in the day.
...
Back to the cluefree "teacher"... why is she in this line of work? It just staggers me that someone who dislikes children would seek to work with them. Is she just... sadistic? Masochistic? wtf?
Yeah, I think we're talking about the same thing. His sensory needs seem to change daily.
I only know her from disrupting my classroom once a week but I've seen teachers like this before, they think they're doing the kid a favor making him as miserable now as he will be K-12. Yelling instead of teaching the skill or building his tolerance. My outlook is that this is his first educational setting why not make it something enjoyable so he has a better attitude for the next 13 years, while patiently building in him a desire to learn and giving him some survival strategies. This kids mirror neurons need to fire in a relentlessly positive atmosphere. He's had a rough go but he's young he can develop on a different trajectory than society seems to expect.
I don't know anything about ESL training but I'd guess she thought she'd be more a consultant than a teacher. Maybe she's better with typicals but guess what, the world is integrated.
Since she is an ESL teacher I think you should give her a "fuck you" in more than one language. Don't forget sign language. ;)
You're saying I need to give the puta a talking to?
Possibly accompanied by a bitch slapping.
Possible a reposting but, I dedicate this illustration to you Griff. With my profound thanks.
The poem performed by the author:
[YOUTUBE]RxsOVK4syxU[/YOUTUBE]
Pretty intense man, thanks.
Stepped out of the car in smallville tonight after a 3 hour drive and my sister was on the phone. Our mother fell today and broke her pelvis. She's been in the ER since this morning, waiting for a bed to come available. She's stable and has pain meds - I called and talked to the ER doc, and things are stable.
But. I'm so tired after bringing my father here last weekend. I still don't rebound like I did before chemo. I should go see my mother but can't figure out how - I don't have the leave, and I don't have the energy. For tonight I'm just too tired. I'll see if things are clearer, or if I have the energy to jump on a plane, rent a car, drive drive drive, and come back again within 24 hours, in the morning.
Oh, and ... I put a little color in my hair today, just gave it some depth and a richer tone. I'm not brave with hair color. But my second son, who is on the autistic spectrum, was distressed and has cried and protested multiple times since I got home. Interesting - he didn't get upset when I was bald during chemo. But he doesn't do well with me cutting my hair or doing anything with color. It's not really upsetting because I've been here, done this before. But it just sort of finishes out the night.
I'm so sorry, ortho. Is he perhaps so upset with the change this time because now he equates hair change with all the sadness and stress that went along with chemo?
It's hard to tell. He doesn't like me to look 'different', so being bald during chemo (even though I wore cute little caps and had a wig for public outings) probably was a big stress for him. But he's always, from a little boy, hated it if I changed my hair. I had long hair (almost waist-length) for years when he was little. The day I had it cut, he could not be consoled.
I'm so sorry Ortho. There is a limit to what you can do remember that.
Oh damn, Ortho. I'm really sorry about your mom.
We've had some good news today - her fracture is stable and doesn't need surgery, so her recovery will be a matter of weeks rather than months. She was very happy to hear that (as were we all) so was pretty upbeat on the phone.
Baby's mother passed away night before last. She'd been in ill health for a long time. She was 70-ish.
:blackr:
Sorry, Gravdigr. Give Baby a hug for us.
Bummer, I'm sure you'll be there for her.:(
I'm sorry, Grav. My condolences to all.
Sad news Gravdigr. My condolences to Baby and her loved ones, including you.
Ah damn, that's so sad. Give your lass an extra hug from us.
Poor baby. I am glad she has you to help her through this time grav. Xx
She sends her thanks for all your thoughts.
My stepdaughter is such a mess, and it's so hard to watch.
She's 15, but her maturity level is about that of a 12-year-old. She's been diagnosed with ADD, social anxiety disorder, and has some OCD behaviors that according to her psychiatrist mean she is "heading for a full-blown personality disorder," but he can't decide which one yet.
Blood tests have also shown definitively that she has anti-gliadin (i.e. celiac) antibodies, but her mom's not interested in whether that's causing some or all of her neurological symptoms. Never mind the fact that at our house, where she is gluten-free, we see maybe 10-20% of the behavior problems that her mom reports seeing. Instead she has her on Lexapro, Focalin, and Risperidone, none of which seem to be making much difference, according to her mom. She has developed frequent physical tics, a common side effect of Risperidone and one they usually say means you need to transition off the med ASAP, but the mom and psych believe the tics are inherently hers and not a side effect of the med. She has talked about suicide multiple times, another massive fucking warning sign for teens on Risperidone, and yet still they keep her on the med.
We have tried to convince her to come live with us, but she is afraid of hurting her mother's feelings. Yet she was baffled when we tried to explain to her that killing herself would hurt her mother far more than choosing to live with us. In her mind, taking herself out of the world is just her own business, rejecting both houses equally rather than judging one to be better than the other. And to be honest, coming to live with us wouldn't actually solve as much as we'd like, because her mother would freak out, move to our city to be closer, and generally insert herself so much into her life that it would be like she was living with her anyway.
It's hard being part of a step family. Hard to know what the best answer is most of the time. Mostly your hands are tied, especially when the children involved are old enough to have some say in where they live etc.
Can Mr Clod suggest to his ex that it's in his daughters best interest to have a change of scene, or even just put it to her that he wants a turn at full time parenting before she's an adult? I'm sure you guys have considered all the options, so I hope something changes the outcomes which seem likely for your stepdaughter. xx
Oh yes, the lengthy and expensive custody battle made it pretty clear he wanted a turn at full-time parenting. :) If he tried to take it back to court now, the mom would most likely bring her psych in to testify that such a "dramatic" change would be too destabilizing for her. Plus, she's old enough that the judge would ask for her input--he doesn't have to do what she says, necessarily, but it does factor in--and we think she would probably say she wanted to stay with her mom, to avoid hurting her mom's feelings.
Our hope right now is that she can manage to weather the next two years, and then get the hell out of that household (which is emotionally unhealthy in a number of ways,) at which point she can take control of her life and hopefully blossom.
I'm sorry too, Clod. I hope she can hold it together until she can get out.
Our hope right now is that she can manage to weather the next two years, and then get the hell out of that household (which is emotionally unhealthy in a number of ways,) at which point she can take control of her life and hopefully blossom.
What makes you think she'll be emotionally ready and able to leave in two years?
Nothing. But she'll never get emotionally ready if she doesn't leave first. The house is full of codependency (from the mom) and verbal/emotional abuse (from the other relatives living there.) If she doesn't get out at 18, when there's a logical impetus to leave and go off to college, she'll never escape. That's why the mom is still living in the family home, even though she's in her 40s and it means she has to share a single bedroom with both her children.
Nothing. But she'll never get emotionally ready if she doesn't leave first. The house is full of codependency (from the mom) and verbal/emotional abuse (from the other relatives living there.) If she doesn't get out at 18, when there's a logical impetus to leave and go off to college, she'll never escape. That's why the mom is still living in the family home, even though she's in her 40s and it means she has to share a single bedroom with both her children.
Not sure about where you live, but that alone would be a huge red flag and nearly reason enough for the court to remover her from the home.
the mom is still living in the family home, even though she's in her 40s and it means she has to share a single bedroom with both her children.
Wow. That's fucked up. I mean, I know some people can't afford any better, and who am I to judge? But if you have any options, that's not a good living arrangement.
...The house is full of codependency (from the mom) and verbal/emotional abuse (from the other relatives living there.)
...That's why the mom is still living in the family home, even though she's in her 40s and it means she has to share a single bedroom with both her children.
Oh wow, I thought it was just a clingy Mom, but much more fucked up than I'd imagined. I hope she reaches escape velocity.
Oh wow, I thought it was just a clingy Mom, but much more fucked up than I'd imagined. I hope she reaches escape velocity.
Yeah, just make sure she knows she has a soft landing at your house.
That's it right there: knowing there is a soft landing somewhere.
I hope things work out for her.
Not sure about where you live, but that alone would be a huge red flag and nearly reason enough for the court to remover her from the home.
It was this way back during the custody battle too. They argued that it was "cultural" (Vietnamese,) both the staying in the family home and the closeness. To be fair, the house is 5,000 square feet, they're not living in squalor. The family is loaded, but as the black sheep who went out and got knocked up, they give her none of it. She could sue for her portion of the inheritance, but doesn't have the balls.
Yes, it's "cultural" for extended families to stay together in one house, but mother and children to stay in ONE bedroom? I don't think so. And Vietnamese just don't do that anymore. Not in America, that is. They only do that when they can't afford to live on their own. That woman sounds like she's having a difficult time supporting her kids. Your husband really should have custody of the kids. By the way, nowadays, only one set of parents, meaning either the husband's parents or the wife's parent, live with the family. Extended families don't usually live together anymore.
I didn't know your husband's ex is Vietnamese.
Maybe you can subpoena Lola as an expert witness.
:bolt:
I'm sorry you're going through this right now, clod. We are dealing with something similar with my stepdaughter, but probably not as dramatic. Still, these mind meddling bio moms are the pits! Just wanted to add whatever words of comfort I can. It won't be this bad forever.
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I'm sorry, I have to post again. Probably, stepdaughter is afraid of the backlash of guilt she will endure till the end of time is the biggest reason she doesn't move to dad's house. That's the case with ours, anyway. Guilt is the control mechanism for abusive bio mom in our case.
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Hey kero, good to hear from you!
Probably, stepdaughter is afraid of the backlash of guilt she will endure till the end of time is the biggest reason she doesn't move to dad's house.
Oh, absolutely. What we can't figure out is if she wants us to be the "bad guys," demanding that she come live with us so that she gets what she wants without having to look responsible for the change, or if she really doesn't want to deal with switching schools and all those things teenagers put a lot of weight on in addition to their parental situation.
It probably just has to be her decision either way. And if she chooses status quo, she isn't ready to take responsibility for that choice yet. Ours is going through that, too. She feels like she is hurting no matter what she does.
Personal responsibility is something she has not had role modeled to her in the 9 years she has lived with bio mom. We can't expect her to suddenly get that she can have some responsibility for her choices and be okay with it. Especially at 15. I imagine yours is similar.
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Maybe your being willing to take the fall and be the bad guys is what she needs from you right now. Then, over time, she can learn that it can be safe and desirable to be responsible. Right now she's just a kid who needs help.
And probably a little bit of "social inertia" too.
That too. Only you (the parents) can know whether it is right to make that call. We keep going back and forth on that very point. Do we fight for them to live here, or allow them to choose
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Mum's seriously considering having Mia put down.
Because she's being annoying.
On one level I am very upset by this, disappointed in her and quietly horrified.
But when I think it through, I can understand her decision and how she's approaching it. Quality of life is important, and Mum feels hers is being very much compromised by the cat. She hasn't slept in her own bed for the best part of two years now. She finds Mia's constant miaowing very difficult to deal with, and she is slowly being driven mad by the fact that Mia will no longer stay in their room during the day, but needs to be in the living room (this is a problem because of Diz -he can't stay shut up in my room 24-7 and he can't get on with Mia).
Mum says Mia has dementia (hmmmm).
She's certainly deaf and does behave quite erratically. She walks into things and falls over sideways on occasion, although the vet says this is probably due to her loss of hearing as he can't find anything else wrong.
See the thing is, Mum feels she has too much to deal with at present, and she can't cope. Taking an old cat out of the equation might just improve her life a little, and surely my Mum's life is more important than that of a 19 year old cat?
And after all there is a slight chance Mum might just tip over the edge and really hurt her one day; humans can fight back and a wallop is preferable to euthanasia, but cats are too fragile to take abuse and perhaps a nice quiet slip into sleep is better than being kicked out of the way once too often.
I don't know.
I just don't know.
It's not my decision and it's not up to me to judge.
Oh and Uncle Ted died.
Which is upsetting, but not unexpected.
He's quite a bit older than Dad and has been in a nursing home for a few months now. He didn't know anyone or anything in the last few weeks.
The funeral is 28 January, off to Peckham Rye.
It's at the same Crem as Uncle Charlie and Dad's parents.
I might be the only representative of this branch of Robinson children.
I hope not - I think Ste should take a day off just because it would mean so much to Mum. Dad wouldn't necessarily notice, but another person would be a real help with getting him on and off public transport.
Although hopefully Laura won't come. Mean of me, but it's how I feel. It's not likely anyway, she had always judged family on how they treat her children and Ted was just too old and lived too far away to be involved in her kids' lives.
ETA I didn't mean to put my Uncle's actual death below the potential death of a family pet, it was just what was on the top of my mind when I started writing.
Some cat charities can rehome old cats. Some people will be glad to home a pet at the end of its life.
Hope the funeral goes ok.
Sent by thought transference
Sorry about your uncle Sundae. Xx
19 is a pretty good innings for a cat. Maybe your Mum is right? Has she always been a wower? It is very hard to deal with. Maybe rehoming is a good option? Your mum does have a lot of things to worry about at present. I hope you can help her find the best solutioj. Xx
Nineteen is a good age for a cat. And Mia has changed significantly in the last year, so perhaps she is genuinely losing her marbles.
She wasn't vocal when she was younger - not at all.
She didn't call or even purr very much.
After my parents' other cat died (half-Siamese, VERY vocal) she became a normal, slightly quiet cat.
Now she doesn't really shut up.
She cries constantly to come out of the bedroom, to be let into and out of rooms, to go out of the house or come back in again, for food and just for general attention.
It doesn't bother me, I'm used to Diz McNoise, but I can understand that it's getting to Mum.
I think she would rather have Mia put down than adopted.
It would seem more cruel to her having an old and confused cat taken away from her surroundings for the last year or so of her life.
And I agree with that, as skewed as it sounds.
Given the choice between having Diz adopted or put down of course I would choose adoption for him (although I'd rather be put down myself that let him go) but he's still capable of adapting.
I'm not sure if Mia would even survive a cattery these days.
After my parents' other cat died (half-Siamese, VERY vocal) she became a normal, slightly quiet cat.
Well yeah, dead cats tell no tales.
Sorry, couldn't resist. I know what you meant in context.
19 yo is very old for a kitty. If said kitty weren't falling down and stuff I wouldn't advocate euthanasia...but I wonder about a blind cat who falls down. I didn't think blindness would affect a cat's ability to stay on its feet.
So sad, no matter. I wish the best for you and Mia in this situation. :(
Falling down for no reason would indicate neurological problems to me. And maybe this is anthropomorphizing a bit, but I would be inclined to equate the constant meowing with the unsettled ramblings and rantings of an elderly person, which would make them an indicator of fear/confusion--basically, mental suffering. If Mia were a person perhaps you could reach her, find a way to explain that everything was still all right, but as she's a cat, it's unlikely.
Just being completely honest here, I hope you don't hate me for this, but I'd probably go with a quiet, painless euthanesia as well, if the choice were up to me. Not because of the annoyance factor, but because I would assume that her quality of life had gone down enough that it was wrong to prolong the suffering just for the sake of keeping the humans company a little longer. In my defense, I'm also usually a fan of hospice care for terminal human patients instead of extreme medical treatments that extend life by only a small fraction.
I don't hate you at all. And not because I just don't hate you.
I posted here because I was trying to come to terms with something I found quite shocking.
I mean this is the woman who set an alarm clock to get up and give "my" rabbit oral antibiotics during the night. "My" rabbit because of course she was a family pet, and I had left home by then.
The more I think it through the less I am shocked.
I'm still saddened. But I know Mum is too.
She might not have Mia put down, but she did feel they waited too long with Tinker, the cat I grew up with.
The situation was different, and Tinker was a mercy killing, but Mum was the one who cried and cried.
She doesn't need that on top of everything else.
I'ma gonna tell her it's okay if that is her decision, not that I would have said anything if I didn't agree.
But I do love her, and I want her to know I understand.
Funnily enough (not funny) Auntie Joyce called while I was typing this post.
Uncle Ted's wife.
We had a good old chat.
I had to pass her on to Dad (Mum's housesitting) even though I know he will struggle to hear her and won't necessarily remember she called.
But as she said to me, "Don't worry, I'm used to the Robinson men after all this time!"
Tough call. Good idea to let her know you're on board with whatever decision she reaches.
Super pissed! no direct deposit paycheck yet, they owe me two. Pay schedule is one week arrears I started Jan 2nd. :mad2: Of course no one answers in HR or payroll...
WTF 'Vana? :mad:
I think it's sort of illegal to not pay your employees. What kind of Candyland is that?
Hopefully they wont put her in the hotbox if she tries to run off!
Thank you Ali I need that guffaw... :lol: IM I have no idea what the problem is seems not many work on Friday WTF no one was in to talk to and they are closed in the office til Mon. I am venting so I will not be super pissed when I have to go back to work on Mon.
Yesterday the drive thru dude at McDs shorted me $10 WTF! When I parked and went in the nite manager went to count the drawer and claimed it was right and never came back out to see me but sent the assistant manager out to take down my name and number ... with a fucking crayon!!!:rolleyes: She could spell neither my first or my last name... I took the paper from her took out my pen showed it to her first {because maybe she only knew how to write with crayons} and proceeded to write down my name and phone number. The general manager called me this AM informing me to come in and get my $10 apologizing while telling me they were changing shifts at the time and a dude was not even supposed to be at the window. THESE ARE THE PEOPLE MAKING OUR FOOD! Ok sorry done with that rant ...
To be clear I won't be strapped without the money, I worked hard they should pay me. I don't feel as happy about my job as I did, they ruined it for me and that is what makes me really mad. This is not their first f up. For the first 3 days me and the other part timers had no ID number to punch in and out. Our shift boss was to take care of posting our hours.
The second day my husband came to pick me up not familiar with the place went in the wrong side of the horseshoe drive no one there to bother he parked. Out comes the security guard and says "Hey You! Can you read?" Really? people talk that way to people they do not know in dark parking lots? What is my husband 4 years old? My husband told him he may not want to go there and the guy backed off. Respect is a two way street. The enter and exit signs are smaller than 8x10. These are all just annoying things but no pay really is the icing on the turd.
Vana I had the same shit when I did a temp job in the fall. Do you check your mail regularly? In the end they sent me a check for the first payroll. But they didn't tell me they were going to do that. Lots of others didn't get their checks for ages after because their addresses were incorrect or they didn't check their mail
That is a good idea Monster except all payroll is direct deposit. What makes me a bit paranoid is that last week all the paid associates had a mistake on their checks. The company was to reimburse them for something [like $30 bucks] and the amount was instead deducted and I know my cow orkers were not very happy. Since I do not work Thursday or Friday I have no idea if that mistake was corrected in this week's pay.
Oh and the health insurance offered in my letter they sent to have me work was also OOPSY a mistake :mad: I am surprised at the incompetence at the management level of a business that has existed since the '50's. Maybe I just notice these things because I am not the typical, barely high school educated, employee. :eyebrow:
You've got every right to be pissed. Even though you'll not starve, it's showing you from the gitgo that this is a sloppy organization, and you can expect more of the same.
Of course once you're aware and have lower expectations of normal business practice, the job may work out to be tolerable anyway. You may even be able to use the sloppiness to your advantage.;) You mentioned they've been around since the 50's, probably momentum and habit prevents crash and burn.
Talk to your boss about hiring Monster to kick ass and take names.
Nirvana, I've had countless petty problems with shift rotas, overtime payments and even claiming prizes in my job. At one point Mum even suggested I looked for a better run place to work, and she's very rarely on my side.
My most recent gripes; coming back from booked and sanctioned holiday to find my first shift had been changed. No-one contacted me, no-one told me. A hour before I finished work a colleague queried why I started three hours later than I was supposed to. Huh.
Then I found out exactly how much holiday pay I've lost.
I knew I'd lose some, because I was more interested in being at work with the potential for overtime than I was sitting at home listening to the rows. Bu I was never told I was actually accruing time for every Bank Holiday I worked (these are always on a Monday so I always work them) and for Christmas working. Great communication there chaps. Altogether I've kissed off about two weeks of leave.
And then. And then.
My shifts have changed again.
Because now I'm covering bakery for two days a week.
That I can deal with. It's just I found out that the reasons for this and my previous change in working hours.
I started on morning shifts, was switched to afternoons because of a male colleague.
Got shifted and shafted into the unpopular close-down slot because another colleague couldn't get picked up by her parents that late and am now on the earliest of early shifts because previously mentioned male colleague has moved further away from work and can't leave home as early as I can.
I'm flexible and I like to think I'm quite reasonable. What I doon't like is being bottom of the needs list, when in fact I do have a valid case for keeping my shifts the same week in and week out.
Anyway. What I actually meant to say was that despite all this, I do enjoy my job and I have learned to let other people's mistakes wash over me, mostly. I've just learned to keep a very close eye out.
Ugh. I got enough to live off for a while, but I need to get back into the backstab-force, I mean workforce, so to save some of my money should I ever retire. I should feel proud for all the good the money they stole from me did for the students, I'm sure. rackin' frackin' varmints. :yosemitesamsmilie:
It should be like the military: the sooner you start the sooner you can retire. I'd be retired for about 5 years by now.
Spring. I'll be able to deal with it in the spring.
Good idea Bruce! They supposedly pay me $250 for every work referral that lasts 6 months how long do you think Monster would work without a paycheck? ;)
Sundae doncha hate having to have a 3rd eye? Bottom of the needs list indeed! That is what really annoys me.
Question: what if I go in on Mon still having not received my pay [ hoping they correct it during the day Mon., I work 2nd shift] and HR tells me that now they have to pay my this Friday? Should I :
1) Insist on immediate pay
2) Quit
3) Grease up and take it
"1) Insist on immediate pay"
Most large businesses aren't set up to make immediate payments. It's usual and customary for them to have until the next paycheck to correct deficiencies from the previous pay period. If you insist on immediacy, your first paycheck may also be your last one there.
"2) Quit"
Quitting with no notice over one late paycheck will work against you everywhere else. You can tell them that if your pay isn't corrected on the next paycheck, such a breach would constitute their waiver of any requirement for advanced notice of resignation.
"3) Grease up and take it"
If they brush you off, tell them you're going to the local unemployment office this week to claim benefits for the weeks they haven't paid you. If they know you're willing to go to an affiliate of your State's Labor Department with the issue, it may motivate them to correct the deficiency expeditiously. Of course, it won't help if they're in financial trouble for which, btw, messing with employees' paychecks is an indicator. If you want to get nasty, tell them you're going to turn the amount in arrears over to a collection agency (which they know will reflect on their credit rating).
4.) Demand compounded interest. ;)
Sexobon I entered into an implied contract when I was hired "I work you, pay me" This is an "at will" employer they could fire me for no reason and I may quit for no reason, at any time, they do not need to give reason nor do I.
My first day was Jan 2nd. My pay was to be 1 week in arrears, I should have been paid on Jan 10th. When I was not paid on Jan 17th I find them in breach of "our contract" I personally think they need to pay me ASAP or our working relationship is no longer.
I already looked up the Wage and Hourly division laws in the state of Indiana. However I do think they will pay me but they have ruined any incentive I might have had to go beyond what may be asked of me in their work environment.
For some reason10 new hires did not show up for orientation and I suspect they could not pass the drug screen. Finding people to suit them seems a bit tough for them and all their hoops one must jump.
The fact that they pay you to sit through videos on orientation [4 hours] safety in the work place, charity works they are doing in other states, and how to treat fellow employees leads me to believe they do have the money to pay their people they just have as Bruce declared, sloppy management right now.
I already thought of interest ;)
They do give you a voucher for prescription safety glasses as long as you buy them at WalMart. I have been there twice but feel reluctant to purchase when I have not been paid :)
I hear what you're saying about at will employment as it pertains to labor law. I don't hear you recognizing that most at will employers have policies requiring advance notice of resignation without which they may not give you a favorable reference and they may bar you from ever working for them again, meaning at all of their locations everywhere, their affiliates, and possibly employer contracted organizations.
Your orientation was done to meet regulatory and insurance requirements in addition to avoiding lawsuits (perceived discrimination or other) arising from employees' interactions. Charitable work is tax deductible eye candy for internal propaganda and external advertising. If they simply have sloppy management right now, it's because they got what they paid for and simply couldn't afford better.
If the safety glasses are free and you don't have to work there for a specified period so the cost won't be taken out of your paycheck, get them before you quit. That may be the only compensation you get for all the aggravation they're causing you now and may cause you in the future. That's also your interest on the late paychecks.
Of course, I'm just playing devil's advocate now. You're the person embedded in the situation. You have all the insights. You have all the answers. You're also the one who hasn't been paid; so, I think I'll stick with playing devil's advocate. Good luck.
ha. The commute's a little far for me, but I'd take it. I'd get paid too. In blood if necessary ;)
If you started on the 2nd, I wouldn't expect the first payday to be earlier than the 17th. Which was yesterday. You get paid on Fridays? And is it definitely every week? Almost everything here pays two-weekly. And on Thursdays. if you started a job on the 2nd here (a Thursday) and got paid by the 16th, you'd be bloody lucky. It usually takes a couple of weeks to get the direct deposit set up.
Have you checked with the other workers to confirm when pay is deposited and asked them how long it took for they pay to get set up?
Sexobon first I do appreciate your advice :) I have a 56 page handbook this is their written out policy...
Employment At Will
Unless otherwise stated in writing and signed by the CEO associates are not hired for any specific length of time. This means any associate or XXXX [company name] may terminate employment AT ANY TIME, for any reason with or without cause.
They also say they are committed to providing competitive wages ;)
The safety glasses are not entirely free, they pay most of the cost, they do not pay the cost of an eye exam and my eyes are bad so my prescription also runs over the cost of what I am allowed. They will cost me $96 out of pocket. While I may not quit if they don't pay me tomorrow I felt good saying it. :) I don't have to have this job that is my luxury. I am asset rich and cash poor but I consider a cow a liquid asset I won't starve. :) I am just angry that the whole experience working for them so far is tainted now and them potentially saying sorry doesn't really fix it for me.
Monster pay is weekly [weakly;)] I was surprised by this as well because most companies are as you say.
I forgot to say I asked other employees about pay and how it was set up and no one ever said they were not paid in accordance to what the policy states [one week in arrears] I also asked what time of day pay was in their accounts. 6 hours after that quoted time, mine was not there so I knew I was screwed. Oh and to make matters fun Monday is a holiday yay!
You may be complaining about a system that counted on one particular employee not taking a vacation.
That's really odd.
The payment schedule I mean. Only one job in my whole lifetime has paid fortnightly, the rest have been monthly (unless they were cash, ie Saturday jobs, which were then paid weekly).
It's funny the things you don't even realise are so different from place to place.
Oh, it was casually dropped into conversation today that my days off are changing. Again.
Tuesday and Saturday now.
Not that it's been mentioned officially. The person who draws up the rota is off on Sundays. But the colleague who requested a change in her days off has had it confirmed and was told I'd be covering for her.
I think she was a little embarrassed when I was cross about it.
I did reassure her it wasn't her fault (although she is the sort of person who should think before she speaks more often).
So tomorrow I really am going to raise the issue of common courtesy.
ASK me first.
I will almost definitely always say yes, and with good grace.
But don't bloody well assume.
UT that was the excuse given for me not being paid on Jan 10th ;) I can't wait to hear the new excuse. Venting here is helpful because I am German and you can tell a German but you can't tell em much. [/temper tantrum]
Common courtesy is certainly lacking in many aspects of life Sundae. As a courteous person it is hard to understand those that are not.
The payment schedule I mean. Only one job in my whole lifetime has paid fortnightly, the rest have been monthly (unless they were cash, ie Saturday jobs, which were then paid weekly).
Mr. Clod used to have a job where they paid every 2 weeks, and this caused all sorts of havoc for him because in the US, child support is ordered to be withdrawn automatically from your paycheck. The child support payments were monthly, and periodically there would be three paychecks in a month, so they were perpetually over- or under-drawing from his paycheck, and then he'd have to get on the phone together with his HR department and a state worker for up to an hour, trying to get the problem corrected. He wasn't
allowed to just write them a check for the correct amount, because the system inherently assumes dads are untrustworthy.
but mostly the third payday in a month is a bonus. ;) Shame it doesn't happen more often. A financial blue moon.
My horoscope for today as it pertains to this thread made me laff
There is good financial news coming your way. If you are looking for work, it is a good day to set aside time to polish your resume. If you are working, volunteer to take on a new responsibility. If you are in business for yourself, you could get new clients today.
That wasn't in the company paper was it? :eyebrow:
Ha ha Bruce :) If they have a newsletter they send out, I will never get it. When I got to work I got a "live" check that has an incorrect mailing address for me and they shorted me 4 hours pay :eyebrow:
Since I could not really look at the check until I got home [2nd shift] I will have to again call HR 'if' the company is open tomorrow, we are on the edge of a 1-2ft lake effect snow dump :greenface
And tell them the snow will continue until you've been properly compensated.
Did they have the check there waiting for you, or did they cut it when you went in to see them? At least you got a check and quickly!
(do you think they had mailed one to the wrong address?)
I think that when I called Friday someone got an email and my check was hastily made up to look like it had been there. Why I think that is because the bank the check is on is the same as my bank the only possible foul up could be the wrong address but the acct number was correct for the bank. Also the body language and actions of the HR person.
YAY the weather men were wrong! :)
sundae, sorry about your uncle, and your cat.
nirvana, glad you got a check, I would strongly encourage you to keep fighting for the four hours they've shorted you.
Wage theft is a real issue-don't let it slide.
I just got back from the vet with Slick. He has to have another tooth taken out. $75 to confirm what I said all along. Then another $30 for antibiotic shot. If that doesn't clear up the bit of infection by Tuesday, another round of the antibiotic pills. Ever try to give a cat pills? I swear I can actually hear him go "Ptui!", and the distance he can get on an ejection! Wow.
I could never put Slick down because of annoyance, or inconvenience. I assumed a certain responsibility when I/we took him in, and discarding that responsibility would be breach of contract, and, well, high and low points considered, he's held up his end. In spades.
Awww. Poor Slick.
And poor you.
Try branschwieger (sp) liverwurst for the pills Gravdigr ...go Slick! :)
I could never put Slick down because of annoyance, or inconvenience. I assumed a certain responsibility when I/we took him in, and discarding that responsibility would be breach of contract, and, well, high and low points considered, he's held up his end. In spades.
You're a good man, Grav. As for giving a cat a pill ... I've done that plenty. It helps to have a second person handy, and a large bath towel. Mummy-wrap the cat in said towel; open the cat's jaws by prying at the lip crease; press in with a thumb and finger on either side to really get optimal mouth-opening; and either you or your helper immediately jettison that pill/capsule/whatever far back into the cat's throat. FAR, far back is the key. As soon as that happens, clamp the cat's jaws shut and hold them shut. Stroke the cat's throat and murmur to him/her (doesn't matter what profanities you murmur as long as it's a comforting murmur). Don't let the cat open its jaws until you see its throat convulse in a swallow. Hold on until you see that swallow.
If your helper (or your right hand) doesn't get the pill/capsule/whatever far enough back, you'll have to try again. It has to hit the very back of the throat. You can do it. I had to do this dozens of times while I had a cattery, and it works.
Grav, I applaud your commitment and sense of responsibility. Our animals depend on us. Two thumbs up (and more, if I had them) to you!
Dont you have those pill syringe things over there? They are great. You can just about insert the pill directly to the gut!
one less tooth means less chance he'll bite into the chunk of meat and find the pill, no?
pea-shooter. Beano-style (for the Brits)
wait, I actually do have sensible advice for a one-person approach. If all the towel business isn't for you, grab the scruff, use the other hand to pop the pill in when he opens then push the jaw shut and hold, then blow (gently) on his nostrils. the keep-mouth-closed-and-swallow reflex works pretty much every time. With babies too, should you be getting broody. (Not that baby. necessarily)
I spent the last two or three years of Pilau's little life shoving pills down his throat every day.
Oh, he was a nightmare. Bless him, he was cooperative ... except for the swallowing part. I swear he had a hamster cheek pouch thing going on.
Diz is the easiest cat I've ever had to give tablets to.
He's just SO greedy. He assumes everything is food and will try to swipe anything that is going from my hand to my mouth - eat first ask later.
Good luck with Slick, Grav.
Update on Mia - still alive.
Mum is house-sitting for my bro's in-laws, so the issues are on hold. Mia doesn't play up half so much with Mum gone anyway...
And Uncle Ted's funeral is on Tuesday, and I am quite looking forward to it, in a way.
I haven't seen Dad's side of the family in years, as Ted was incapable of travel and although Mum & Dad visited him, it was never a whole family kinda trip.
Funerals are bittersweet that way.
It's great to see everyone, but so sad at the same time.
wait, I actually do have sensible advice for a one-person approach. If all the towel business isn't for you, grab the scruff, use the other hand to pop the pill in when he opens then push the jaw shut and hold, then blow (gently) on his nostrils. the keep-mouth-closed-and-swallow reflex works pretty much every time. With babies too, should you be getting broody. (Not that baby. necessarily)
oh I forgot to mention: if you can, stroke the throat with the hand holding the gob shut :lol:
"...the doctor says you gonna die."
Is this a reference to something I'm missing, or did a doctor actually say this about you, foot?
Dont you have those pill syringe things over there? They are great. You can just about insert the pill directly to the gut!
pea-shooter...
We usually employ this handy little device, it's called a pickle plucker:
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"...the doctor says you gonna die."
Is this a reference to something I'm missing, or did a doctor actually say this about you, foot?
That's a punchline to a joke. Man gets bit on the penis by a snake. His buddy calls 911. He tells the 911 operator his pal's been snake bit. The 911 operator tells him to suck the poison out of the wound. Buddy goes back to snake bite victim, victim asks "What did they say?"
Buddy: "They said you're gonna die."
What Grav said. In reference to medicating cats.
First...
[SIZE="7"][FONT="Impact"]FUCK CANCER![/FONT][/SIZE]
This month they found out my BIL's dad has stage 4 kidney cancer. Today I just got the news that it is inoperable and when they take him off of dialysis they expect him to be dead in a week. He's no older than my parents.
Second...
[FONT="Impact"][SIZE="7"]FUCK CANCER!!!!!![/SIZE][/FONT]
That sucks. I'm sorry, MTP.
I'm sorry to hear that, mort. :(
Sorry to hear that, MTP.
Fuck cancer.
I just got back from the vet with Slick. He has to have another tooth taken out.
Well, he lived through being knocked out yet again. I
did get to watch him wobble around a bit...still drunk when he got home.
What upset me? Getting to clean quasi-dried catshit outta the crate. The vet usually puts an absorbent pad in there with him, but, for some reason, didn't this time. And the bath towel that was in there with him when he went in went missing somewhere along the way.
Ick. Thank God for paper towels. And scrubbing bubbles.
Not quite upsetting, sad rather. Son of a neighbor's, we're a tight knit community here, was killed last night in a car accident. He was only 26 yrs. old and finally got his life together again. He was in drugs and heavy drinking. He finally got a steady job. Probably still partying, but not as hard. I heard he went out drinking after work last night (he works 2nd shift) and was hit by a car on the street. His poor mother must be devastated. That was her baby and favorite. There's this lady in the complex who's been sent home to die due to her long term battle with skin cancer. It has finally spread and gotten into her lungs. Yet, she is still here (not much longer though :( ). Here is a 26 yrs. old. Dead. :(
Sorry Lola. I knew a guy in college who got run over by a car. It's the kind of thing you don't really think about past the age of 9, but sometimes pedestrians just don't look, and/or drivers just don't see you.
The kid was 28 yrs. old, not 26. I remembered wrong. The kid was a victim of a hit and run. We just found out from the victim's brother that the police have found the culprits. The car was driven by a girl with 3 boys in it. When they hit him, his body got stuck underneath the car, so they dragged him for 30 meters before his body fell off. Therefore, his body is pretty smashed up. The car that hit him is a newly bought car with its temp license plate, which fell off at the scene of the crime. This helped the police quickly find the culprits. Also, the deceased's friend is a cop, so when he found out about the incident, he pushed for a quicker investigation. The kid's mom is stronger than I thought. She told my mom that when her husband passed away about 3 years ago, she bought a plot for herself next to him. Three days ago, she had a vision. She was sitting at the dining room table when suddenly she saw her youngest son lying in the plot next to her husband. For this reason, she feels that it's his time to go. Yes, yes....I know most of you don't believe in the supernatural. This is the story she told my mom when she went to visit her this afternoon. Whatever makes her stronger to accept the truth is all good.
I'm sorry, Lola.
Glad they caught the culprits. Nothing will bring the victim back, but that's what the four kids need to take responsibility for - they did something that can never be made right, and then drove away.
Not all of us are skeptics about the second sight, but aside from that, whatever helps the young man's mother through this is good.
I just heard something terribly sad. Alice, who was the School manager until a few months had her second baby in July. Just had a staff email come round to tell us that the baby has cancer in her eyes and is now undergoing chemo and various other treatments.
Poor little thing. Seven months old ffs. And poor Alice. I don't know her well, but have always liked her. She helped me out loads when I was starting out with my postgrad stuff. And is just a really lovely and cheerful person.
What a horrible thing for any parent to see their child going through.
Fuck cancer.
Holy shit, Dana. That's so sad. I'm sorry.
Retinoblastoma, most likely. :(
The good news is that it has a high cure rate. The bad news is that the treatment modalities can be horrible, depending on the number and size of tumors and whether unilateral or bilateral.
Fuck cancer.
Oh yeah, fuck cancer again.
Someone is coming to view the 'rents house this afternoon.
Just cleaned 90% of my room. Will do the rest after lunch.
Yup, the 'rents are moving. Nope, Diz and aren't moving with them. We can't. No pets no overnight guests.
Don't get me wrong, I'm made up for them, the place sounds wonderful, it's right in the town centre and it will seriously improve Mum's quality of life.
Just scared for myself and what's to come.
So I'm coming to America later this Spring, because why not. I won't have anywhere to live after all.then throw myself on the mercy of the Council when I get back.
Which is what I'd have to do as soon as this places sells anyway, so I may as well take this chance while I can.
Perhaps I should have posted in the Good News/ Bad News thread.
But cleaning always makes me irritable.
Oh I talked to the Deputy Manager at work this morning.
I had to really, I was in a bit of a state. He was wonderful and has definitely got back the goodwill the company had lost form me recently.
Just as well, because over the next three months I'm going to be spending plenty of hours there to get some money behind me. And to afford rent in someone else's house (ick).
Mum says they'll pay my way to America in May.
See y'all then.
Mum says they'll pay my way to America in May.
Whoa, thanks mom! So the work folks will let you have the vacation time, or are you quitting your job in May because you'll have nowhere to live?
I'm going to have to negotiate.
Of course the system being the system I'd be in a better position to get housing if I wasn't working, but I would far far rather be allowed a Sabbatical than quit.
There's precedence for it, especially if an employee is facing personal difficulties. I wouldn't be asking for paid leave after all.
What will happen to Diz while you travel? Will your mom pay for kennels too or are you travelling before they move?
Care of Dizcat is also up for negotiation. I'm hoping to have him fostered.
But things are now changing on a daily basis. Mum told me this afternoon that they will be out of here in four weeks regardless of whether they have a buyer or not.
She thinks it makes financial sense because they will stop paying Council Tax.
But while the house is still being shown they will be paying gas and electricity and she always used to worry about leaving the place vacant for more than 48 hours.
They don't start paying rent on the flat until they move in, but I think having signed off on the dotted line she just wants to be in there, right now, all done, end of.
Which I do understand.
Maybe I got that from her :)
It puts my previous plans into freefall though.
Basically my only sensible option is to throw myself on the mercy of the Council immediately.
Which means staying in work.
And means being housed in a B&B or hostel at best. Which means losing Diz.
And which means no trip to America.
I thought I might have two-three months. But from what she's just said to me on the phone, she wants this place vacant for viewing. Once they start moving out, I need to move out too. Probably my own fault, I've never been as tidy as she wanted. She no doubt thinks if I stay my clutter will spread. And she might be right.
In better news, I went to their new place today and it is very nice. Much lighter and brighter than here, and in a much better location.
Just as big as here, and all on one floor. Less potential for falls for Dad but no let-up in cleaning for her.
And only one toilet. Which will lead to conflict.
I didn't say that to her, she needs to know I'm happy for her because I am.
Still, the bathroom has a HUGE walk-in shower, which will be great for both of them.
And I bet it has better water pressure than here. Or if not they can complain to the charity!
There's certainly enough room for a seat if it becomes necessary for Dad.
So it's a so/so report from me.
I'm terrified, they're happy.
And if I had to choose I'd rather have it that way round.
Thing is, I hate change. I just do.
And the 'rents have always been here. Literally and figuratively.
So I'm losing that support, but also losing a home.
Yes I know I'm way too old to think that way, but it's how I feel and why it's upsetting me.
I have made my own way in the world, but sometimes I've had to come back. Like MTP I feel I've failed at life. I guess this is make or break. I've cried down the phone to a few wonderful people, and they have really reached out to help. But with hating work 2/5 of the week, losing sanctuary and facing being without Diz, it's all a bit much even so. If money was no object I think I'd still be fucked up. I'm wired a bit wrong. I'd make it to America though, then you could see the fuck-uppedness firsthand.
Urgh.
Is there a Fucked Up Self Pity Thread?
I hate change too, especially when it's being foisted upon me by outside forces.
Yeah, change sucks, even though I know you'll come out on top like you always do, Cherry. You're employed and personable--I don't know what the council politics are like, but if I were on the council you're the kind of person I'd want to help out because I'd believe it was a good investment.
How much longer before you will have a rental deposit so you don't need the council to help? you must've been working for a few months now. is there any chance of changing to full time to bump that up?
For a bedroom in a shared flat in that part of the country, you're looking at a minimum of £80 per week if you go for a private let.
And it is standard practice to ask for 1-2 months down plus twice the monthly rent as deposit.
£1400 or thereabouts.
How long do you imagine that takes to save on minimum wage?
is that directed at me? if so, I have no idea, which is why I asked. I'm guessing from the tone of your response that the answer is that that is not a realistic option, but I hope I'm wrong because unless things have changes drastically for the better, I don't see the council being overly sympathetic to a single adult with no kids.
So next avenue... could you rent from your parents, Sundae, seeing as they don't need to sell in order to make the move? Maybe they'd feel more comfortable about the "expanding to fill the space" thing if you had a formal, signed rental agreement?
Sorry. That was way snippier than was warranted :p
I've been in a bitch of a mood all day.
A room in a shared house now costs £400. Without overtime I take home less than £600.
So things are very tight.
My parents have to sell to meet the conditions of the charity they will be renting from. Absolutely no income from property allowed. Of course they would be allowed overlap between owning property and renting the flat, because this is the real world and you don't sell your house on the day you move out of it, but as far as me renting from them, that's a definite no.
And re working full time, again no.
I applied for a full time position and only got 17.5 hours. The only people employed full time in the store are Managers. In fact most shifts are deliberately under 4 hours so that you don't qualify for a break. It's very common now. At least I'm not on a zero hours contract.
I can still pick up overtime here and there, but I can't guarantee it.
And it's not so much the initial moving costs which are the problem, as Mum says they will meet those, especially if I'm not going to America. It's the day to day living which is stretching out in front of me and making me distressed.
Is there any chance you could get full time at another supermarket now that you have experience and a proven track record? (and bakery experience ;) )
Seems so "out of the blue" for your parents to do this. sucks.
It does suck the big fat one, but a do have the crumb of comfort that that are doing the right thing for them. Mum's life will be happier because of it, and she's been unhappy for quite a while now.
Urgh. Bakery.
If I thought that was my only option I'd stick my head in the oven. Although I'd just get burned, as they're all electric of course.
I'm looking. One of the reasons I'm between a rock and a hard place is that here in Aylesbury we have way below the national level of unemployment. But that's masked by the fact many people have been pushed into part time employment. So we don't draw benefits, but we do rely on other people to live.
For many of my colleagues this is their partner, for me it was my parents. Although I always contributed and tried to pay my way, I was never paying them as much as a lodger would have. And Mum brushed off anything they would have paid whether I was here on not: TV licence, Internet, phone (which I never used but was great for incoming calls), heating. She just said I more than made up for that by my cooking and baking.
She has said that she'll do all my washing and I can use the Internet there, and eat there at least twice a week. Like I said before though, it's the change. And the fear. I can get help to manage financially, I hope. But no-one can help with me losing my tenuous peace of mind.
I think that's why my first reaction was la la la fingers in ears, going to America, commit suicide when I come home.
I've rethought part of that "plan".
I know you can drive but don't -do you have a license?
Oh yes, just can't afford to keep a car on the road. Petrol, insurance, MOT, tax, potholes...
yes, I know that, but was wondering about a camper, seeing as summer is coming up. maybe a second-hand one costs about the same as a plane ticket to the US but you can live in it. and tour the UK. straws I know, but sometimes a brainstorn yield unexpectes leads. my friends did that for a year or two -set up in static caravan parks
OK I'm off to bed.
Change sucks, for the most part - especially when not chosen. I'm sorry, Cherry.
The Cellar: Love hurts, change sucks, fuck cancer
Sundae, I hope that you don't think I am poking my nose in where it isn't wanted, but have you contacted your local councillors(s)?
A good local councillor can be worth his or her weight in gold when it comes to exerting pressure in the right places.
From various photos you've posted, I believe that you are in the Elmhust area of the town. If so, your councillors are here:
Elmhurst & Watermead.
See items 6.1 and 6.3 in Lisa Smith's declarations of interest.
Carruthers.
PS FWIW I've just posted an old picture in your Aylesbury thread.
Post #487The Cellar: Love hurts, change sucks, fuck cancer
Fuckin' A, man.
Mia was put down today.
She's had a poorly leg for a couple of days but it didn't start off all that bad.
This morning she wasn't moving and when Mum carried her downstairs she wouldn't put any weight on it.
The vet said it was a cat bite.
After a consultation, they agreed that due to her deafness (which is probably what made her vulnerable in a fight), her general confusion and the increasing problems she is having with her kidneys, the time had come to let her go gently.
I know Mum was talking about having her put down from sheer irritation a while back, but that mood passed. In fact despite knowing that this was the kindest thing to do, I know Mum wanted to hang on to her right up until the move. She cried all the way through, and all the way home.
I know it will be a relief for her in some ways, and a way of making a new start, but I did really feel for her.
Oh, £104!
And Mum feels he botched it, as he had to give a sedative after the initial attempt, and then administer two injections when she was still alive after five minutes. She said that when they had Muffin put down it took about 30 seconds.
Still, it was peaceful for Mia.
Very, sad, please deliver :comfort: from me.
That's always hard, there is no easy way. Sorry.
Oh I'm so sorry, Sundae! Hugs to you and your mum from me and Mr Limey. xxx
Sent by thought transference
Ach damn, that's so sad. Condolences to you and your Ma.
I just heard something very sad.
When me and J lived together, our house was part of a block of three storey houses converted into two storey houses with ground floor apartments underneath. The houses were accessed through a courtyard - three of them in an L shape, with steps up to t he doors - My bro and his family live in the one on the short line of the L, then a middle house, then ours was the end one on the long line of the L. The groundfloor apartments have their access at the front of the block.
They're all let by the same property company - and just as J and I ended up in one because my bro recommended when it came up as we were househunting, so the two apartments underneath ended up with friends in them - either friends of Mart, or friends of Scott from the middle house (who became a good mate but I have long since lost touch with).
They were all friends of Martin, and we all kind of jostled along together. Went clubbing with them sometimes - and anytime there was a party we all met up. There was a period of about three years where we all kind of hung out together to varying degrees. Mainly via Martin, from my perspective - I'd chit chat with them round at his house, and we'd say hi as we crossed through the yard. Sometimes one or other of them would come to our house too.
It was our block, ya know?
Then things changed, lives took different turns. Scott moved away - though there'd been a bit of a falling out (resolved) prior to that and he was less a part of the group by then. Mike from the flat below me and J got a different job and was working odd shifts, Martin's girls were getting older and Jen was looking to go into nursing. Me and J split up and I moved out. Tony-Baloney from the other flat, below Martin and Jen, got into a relationship and we didn't see so much of him by then anyway. And the drugs and clubbing and afters parties and all that stuff had already dwindled away, as it does.
I see Tony now and then, walking his dog. Or, now and again he'll be at Martin's when I visit - not so often these days. Haven't seen Mike for ages. Maybe a year and a half ago, as i was going into the courtyard to see Martin, he was coming out of his flat and we said hi.
They were always more Martin's friends than mine, but that was ok. I was 'Martin's kid sister' :p
Just heard from mum that Mike hung himself. Apparently, he'd been withdrawn and becoming more and more hermitlike over the last few months. Martin was round his place a couple of weeks ago, and he was fairly depressed. had got behind in his rent, though he'd set up a payment plan and that seemed to be sorting itself out. But he'd started some new anti-depressants and Martin had apparently been a little concerned about this, as they were the same type which had been implicated in a suicide of someone he knew in Bradford.
But he'd seemed like he was on a level, and maybe starting to come back out of himself. Not so unusual not to visit with each other for a few weeks at a time, with him on odd shifts and Martin with his family commitments. I think he may have mentioned to Tony about the anti-depressants and he'd also been and visited him.
They reckon he did it at least a week ago. The landlords had tried contacting him. He'd stopped answering his phone and the last couple of times Tony or Martin tried knocking on, he didn't answer - not so unusual for Mike, he was often out, but in the circumstances a little worrying. I didn't know about any of this at the time.
With Martin and Tony concerned and the landlords unable to contact him for a fortnight, the police came out and they gained access. he was hanging there. Tony had to identify the body. Martin's over there now at Tony's flat, he's in a state (Tony I mean).
Mike was a nice guy. Built well, but gentle as they come. I didn't know him well, for all that we shared some drunken conversations around Martin's kitchen table, and danced together sometimes during the clubbing days. But I liked him. Feels like we lost one of our own, even though those days of 'our block' are long past.
It's almost certain that I walked Carrot past his place whilst he was hanging there already dead. And we didn't even know.
Rest in Peace, Mike.
I'm so sorry D. Too much of this in the world.
tha's so sad Dana, I'm sorry for you. Mental health, physical health, there's no real distinction between them, any more than there's a distinction between heart health and lung health. but treatments are less ... certain, and the stigma attached to the state of one's mental health/illness (it's a continuum, right?) makes seeking treatment more difficult sometimes. ...
I don't know. It's very sad.
That's so sad. Sorry, Dana. :(
I'm so sorry, Dana.
And Sundae ... sorry too. It's excruciating to go through that.
Hugs to both of you.
Shit, wait till you get old(no you ain't) and all your friends are dead, especially if you have to kill one or two. :(
Really sorry to hear that Dani.
A sad shock for all concerned.
Excuse me, while I hunt down and hug my cat.
Too many things to do too little time to do it, too many expectations no will to keep on going too much just too much. Don't know how to sort it out or let go
Ah damn Monster, that sounds horrible.
Sorry, monster. This is a crap time of year for people beholden to school and extracurricular activities.
That sucks, especially when you've made a promise/commitment you just can't keep when stuff changes. I guess you'll have to prioritize what affects the people you care most about. Of course it's easy for me to sit here on my fat ass and give out questionable advice, but I hope you can come up with a compromise that lets you stay healthy and sane.
Dana: That's so sad. I'm so sorry to hear that.
Monster: I hope things will work out.
Sigh....I think we all need a hug. I need a hug....
:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:
Monster, are the "expectations" commitments you've made, other peoples' assumptions or you setting yourself impossible goals that, actually, no-one else is aware of? If any are the latter two, I hope you can ditch them, and am willing you the strength to do so. X
Sent by thought transference
All of the above :(. And the main thing I got done was (a) an unreasonable expectation of other people and (b) the assholes who dumped the job and ran off to sunny placesassuming the rest of the team would take care of it had the gall to question the decisions I was forced to make in their absence (I was the only one left). I hate people sometimes. Especially me :( I got none of it done yesterday. hoping for better today. Less crying would be good :/
...the assholes who dumped the job and ran off to sunny places assuming the rest of the team would take care of it had the gall to question the decisions I was forced to make in their absence...
OMG, OMG...
~Well, did you leave your opinion on a note somewhere when you took off and dumped everything on me?
~Who the fuck cares what the absentee landlord thinks.
~You ain't working, you ain't voting.
~Hold it right there while I look around for my give a shit... nope, don't see it.
In reality I assume these are parents of your kids friends, and part of the social fabric you hope to navigate smoothly in the future, which sort of rules out dismemberment. Maybe if you really fuck things up once or twice, they won't feel comfy dumping it on you in the future. They down side is you may not have much chance to do things the way you want.
You wimmens is so tricky, you know a couple of tears protect your face from blowback if the wind shifts. ;)
It was hiring swim coaches for the summer team. Supposed to be a committee, all done and dusted about to make the offers then the shit hit the plan on the day they all left town. they all emailed "well sorry, We're just leaving will turn internet back on in a week so can't be part of this problem, trust the rest of you to make the right decision.... yada yada yada
I think I fixed it now (startuing with pointing out that every single one of them but me had done this. :( yeah, I know, I'm whining. Fuck it, I'm entitled
I find that royally fucking things up every once in awhile keeps expectations low and others' involvement at a fair level. The only trick is convincing yourself to allow it to happen.
In Bradford, alone, tired and miserable and feeling the weight of my uncertain future very heavily.
Feeling homesick already, as much for my nice little life as for my parents company, my cat and my bedroom.
I'm sure it will start becoming an adventure again soon, but right now I just wish I was at home and none of this was happening.
Sorry, Sundae!
You can do this.
In Bradford, alone, tired and miserable and feeling the weight of my uncertain future very heavily.
Feeling homesick already, as much for my nice little life as for my parents company, my cat and my bedroom.
I'm sure it will start becoming an adventure again soon, but right now I just wish I was at home and none of this was happening.
I'm sorry, hon. :hug: :hug: :hug:
Ah damn, hon, that sounds hard.
[eta] I've never really minded that my house is a hobbithouse. But right now, I'd give my hindteeth for a spare room. Or indeed one normal adultsized room that could fit more than a teeny sofa.
I'm so sorry Sundae.:comfort:
Hugs to you Sundae! You've for the whole Cellar with you in spirit! XXX
Sent by thought transference
Felt a lot better today.
Had an excellent interview at my current employers. Location isn't ideal though, as it's in an area with higher rent.
And I have another interview with another supermarket tomorrow.
Better location, more hours offered, but a change of employer so I'd need to work out my notice, and I'm apprehensive that the position might not be one I will enjoy.
Of course I haven't been offered either job yet!
But it will be a dilemma if I am offered both...
Anyway, any further update will hopefully NOT be in this thread, just wanted to close this off.
Best of luck, Sundae!:)
Do you know how long you will have to wait before they let you know?
Not specifically, but I would be surprised if I hadn't heard back from Waitrose by Thursday.
They have another group interview tomorrow, but there were only six of us at this one, and I was old enough to be each of the other five's mother. Turns out it was only advertised very briefly (I thought I'd come across the advert very late, but not so much) and it was very vague regardinh hours and job role. My guess is that they needed extra cover and needed it fast and if only teens applied they'd make up more and shorter shifts. With a large student population on their doorstep they can afford to tinker with things like this.
Me applying might have upset the apple cart a little, because with no exaggeration I can say I have experience they would not have expected from the net they cast.
All the kids were super-smart and clued up, don't get me wrong. But my counter, checkout and cafe experience within the same company can't really be matched by a seventeen year old Nigerian student who has no previous work experience. Even if she is a medical student who has been accepted onto a prestigious course a year early, is a Student Ambassador and plans to be a paediatrician. I mean there's impressive, and then there's hit-the-ground-running useful ;)
Worried about tomorrow having read the standard brief.
I'll be turning up without the correct paperwork for a start as I wasn't expecting this interview. I know they know my circumstances, but I hate to look disorganised.
And I have to get a taxi there as its too late to scout out the location. It's at least two miles out of town and I have done too much walking today to trust my feets not to bleed. I also fear getting lost, especially as I can't print out the helpful map they sent to refer back to, which worryingly seems to assume you are travelling by car anyway...
Worry, worry, worry.
This time next month I'll look back on this and laugh.
And laugh and laugh, until the nice nurse puts the comfy jacket with the long sleeves on me again.
I hope all that works in your favor Sundae!
Good luck! I've been thinking of you all day, and will continue to do so tomorrow! XXX
Sent by thought transference
Good luck, Sundae. Thinking of you, and will be doing so tomorrow. xxoo
I'd hire you over some Nigerian teen prodigy any day of the week! ;)
Hmm, Sundae?
French maid costume?
Very dusty bottom shelves?
Yeah, that works. :frog:
It's quarter-to-still-dark but I think that I'm awake enough to wish you all best for today's events, Sundae!
Now, as it is Wednesday I shall be in Aylesbury in a couple of hours to do the weekly shopping. :eek:
Wish me luck!:thumb:
Oh god. I've stalled.
I have honestly just stopped.
I probably only have 2-3 hours worth of work to do, but I can't start and I cant face it.
I will.
I mean, I have to.
And this happens every time I move. But I've still not learned how to deal with it.
I do that with major chores, too. Not much left to do, and it'd be so good to get it all finished, and I just stop. And knit, or do something more fun. I don't think we're alone in that, either ;).
Imma gonna turn up with that van on Wednesday morning, ready or not! X
Sent by thought transference
I don't think we're alone in that, either.
Hell no, some of us have made it an art form. :thumb:
Limey, thanks for herding the wench into her new digs, you're the best.:notworthy
I have a lot more done than the last time I posted.
I managed to start after all.
Mum & Dad are having a snooze downstairs, which is why I am dallying here.
Diz is more unsettled than I've ever known him.
iPad on lap + fractious jumpy-jump cat + frazzled human = the desire get the walloping hands out. But of all the bad things I may be, an animal abuser isn't one.
And yes he is probably going to pee on the carpet given his current stress levels, but I'm moving out. Ha.
All I can do I try not to make it worse for him by shouting.
Even if I want to pee on the carpet myself right now.
Attagirl! Should I buy some incontinence pads for the van seats?
Sent by thought transference
I can hold it in ;)
And Diz has some knockout tablets.
Washed "his" two jumpers (woolly sweaters).
Going to sleep with them tonight and tomorrow night.
They won't go in the cat carrier, but they will go with him to the cattery.
And if he pees all over them then they will go in the bin afterwards; i hope not, they belonged to him and Dylan since I brought them back to my place eight years ago.
Got caught up reviewing old photos.
Gosh, don't you sometimes waste film time and money and emotion on people who don't deserve it?
I can only excuse having so many photos of the Evil Ex on the fact we went to some pretty cool places together. All of which I paid for of course.
All of which have now been binned because, really, I saw them with my own eyes and I don't need to see his face in front of the sights to remember them.
Poetry books packed.
All books packed in fact.
Three library books left to keep me sane/ be returned by Mum.
Camera has no charger. Or at least charger can't now be found.
Great.
Dad! [shakes fist]
Cheap digital camera needed, preferably with charger.
Birthday 1st July, address on application.
As I said before, they have done so much for me.
It's just aggravating that my own personal camera was lost and has still never turned up, along with many cables, chargers, converters etc. and now this. It's such a waste. Sigh.
Keep everything crossed that the battery holds out tomorrow. I'll hold off on the usual train station pics to preserve as much juice as I can.
I have a job. I have a flat. I have a £25 Waitrose voucher. I have friends. Good friends.
No crappy camera can compare to that.
Right, back to the coalface.
Bite sized pieces.
A friend of mine has decided, after numerous cancer episodes, that she will no longer use western medicine to treat her cancer, and will now employ holistic treatment including veganism.
Her husband is a person of science and is appalled... yet knowing he cannot control his spouse. Their three kids ages 7 to 12 hang in the balance.
Oh that is horrible. Upsetting from every angle.
I'm genuinely sorry, UT. No kid should have to watch a parent battle cancer, let alone potentially lose. Sucks all around.
Sorry UT. You didn't say what kind of cancer she has or suggest a rationale for her treatment decision; so, I'll speculate she has already fought the good fight using Western medicine and now wants things to run their course before her kids are old enough to feel responsible for her. Pursuing alternative medicine sends a message to her family that she is still trying for them, even though SHE may have reached acceptance, so that they (especially the kids) won't ever think she didn't love them enough to keep trying to stay with them. :2cents:
I don't know all the details sb.
FWIW my friend did a similar thing and she's still with us. I'm not an "alternative" meds person, but I do think the power of the mind is strong. if you believe in the path you are taking, it seems to do the world of good.....
Worked for Steve Jobs. :rolleyes:
UT, I have a friend who is a really solid cancer surgeon who also uses complimentary medicine.
I will try to get more information. This is a good friend's wife and they have played it very close to the vest so I didn't even know her cancer recurred. And it's one of those things where he told me in an aside while she was out getting something, and then told me it was not a topic for discussion when she came back.
Sometime cancer takes the fight out of you. My Mom fought and beat breast cancer but didn't have the heart to fight her liver cancer later. Until you know what she knows, you probably can't judge her decision making.
People who have cancer rear it's ugly head a second time, now know what they face, like the doctors do. I think that why doctors tend to not fight it in some cases, but they can not make that decision for you, only you can.
That's why it's important to talk to your doctor and make your preferences known, before you end up in a living hell controlled by some well meaning relative.
an investigator for the police department I used to be chief at was found deceased. I'm not enough in the loop to know much now. I had served with him previously in the military. I just have that sinking feeling in the gut that this is a suicide or accidental overdose
:-(
Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I747 using Tapatalk
So sorry, Sarge.
Sent by thought transference
Ah damn, that's sad. Sorry Sarge.
I always want to write things but none of my stuff is as bad as people dying :(
You mean you are upset but it doesn't seem important enough to mention?\, N? It's not a competition, just tell us what's bothering you. If you want, find another thread with a similar title. or start one. This is Nothingland, after all. :) Spill the beans, what's sinking your submarine today?
I always want to write things but none of my stuff is as bad as people dying :(
Doesn't matter, just start out with [SIZE="3"]"I HAVE SIIINNNNNNNED ..."[/SIZE]
I am not looking for a career I have/had that, but I liked working at the candy factory until last WED I have been there for almost 6 months, never late, get along well with cow orkers. Immediate boss claims she put my name in for full time . On Wed I found out she had put in another gal's name because even though she has been there a shorter time and I TRAINED her all of a sudden she has full time. So what am I chopped liver? :neutral:
I like the lady that got full time we get on well. But her work record was not as spotless as mine and I have been there longer and my mantra is any job worth doing is worth doing well rest assured if I made the candy it was very very good. Long time associates cow orkers tell me I was robbed. It was a kick in the gut. :thepain:
My immediate boss does not even know that this lady is always telling me how she could do a better job of running the dept we are in than immediate boss. I don't want to be the boss and micro manage people [yuck] It is only apparent to me that IB >[immediate boss] has let the weasel in her hen house. I hate work place drama and sophomoric games. :mad:
Now I feel like not doing the extra stuff I did to help immediate boss do her job better. And what a face slap to train someone that takes away what was supposed to be my FT position. I cannot be mad at the person that got FT she deserves to have it too. :neutral: [/spilled beans]
Makes me wonder if the weasel has connections?
It sounds odd simply IB told you she had submitted you. :confused:
Maybe IB is told to submit the names of all the people ready for full time status, and someone else makes the decision?
Or your spotless record, strong work ethic, and helpfulness doing extra stuff, is perceived as a threat to IB.
Are you going to tell IB you're disappointed, or let it ride?
... My immediate boss does not even know that this lady is always telling me how she could do a better job of running the dept we are in than immediate boss. I don't want to be the boss and micro manage people [yuck] ...
Or maybe IB knows more than you think, feels secure, and figures she can use a go getter full time to lighten her own workload and as a substitute making it easier to get time off whenever she wants. Does that seem plausible?
We already have a second IB she has been there 4 years. She runs the Dept when IB is off. I would say from observation that my IB fears losing her job so what she did made no sense. PTO is cumulative and all anyone has to do is put in a request 24 hrs prior and even unexpected absence is dealt with in a point system and after 90 days the points fall off. It is very easy to take off work.
Last Wed before I knew they hired lady FT our shift finished the most candy of any shift ever with me being the top "producer" almost double of anyone else. I am [was] the go getter.
So, I take it you think they're sleeping together!
IB knows I am disappointed claims I am still getting full time. I know she feels I am a threat and I have told her I will never be the boss. I am a very confident person this all smells like Jr High school where you could not be smart and attractive and have friends...in this case its above average work performance and I point out infractions like someone who blows their nose and does not change their gloves:eyebrow: and some people perceive this as me picking on them REALLY? And the guys that think they should be mixing candy with their ass crack hanging out :yeldead:
So, I take it you think they're sleeping together!
OMG yes! mutt and Jeff ebony and ivory [not really] :)
This may not apply to you; but, there is a generic consideration with businesses in which part timers don't get healthcare benefits while full time employees do. Some businesses will first grant full time status to those part time employees least likely to use healthcare benefits to keep the employer's insurance costs down. It could be that an employee already has healthcare benefits elsewhere (e.g. Medicare, spouse's employer), has no preexisting conditions on their pre-employment physical; or, is statistically at lower risk (e.g. age bracket). Since employers who offer healthcare benefits must by law insure anyone eligible under their policy, this can be an issue.
I thought of this Sexobon but the lady is the same age roughly and she has nothing I asked her because we were talking about her 8 yr old and she said no health coverage for her one day. I can only speak for me I have no pre existing conditions and I am a non smoker, non drinker. They have security cameras so anyone claiming not to smoke is on camera doing it in the designated smoking area.
The issue may be that they don't think I need the job? I dunno I just feel very disrespected. I guess I will have to change how I feel about it.
I think I expected this company to abide by their own guidelines for recruitment which state; " Candidates with no more than 2 combined attendance/ performance points and a minimum of 6 months in their current position."
This lady had 2 points and has only been in her current position 3 months. :rolleyes: [whine whine whine]
It's a bummer when the company don't abide by their own rules and you know you're the best candidate.
Sent by thought transference
Maybe she had a good sob story. Sometimes those who talk big turn out to be the biggest grovelers behind closed doors and there are bosses who fancy themselves social workers; however, their generosity towards someone with a good sob story never comes at their own expense, it always comes at the expense of the recipient's peers.
The people that write the rules are seldom the people who are supposed to follow or apply them. Without enforcement there's rarely compliance, but if you bring it to their attention you're a troublemaker so you lose either way. This is not unique to the candy company, it's universal in companies big and small.
Thanks Limey
Sexobon you have probably hit the nail on the head and xoxoxoBruce unless they ask me in an exit interview I have no plans to bring anything to their attention.
ugh, N, sucks. Maybe ther'es a better FT position around the corner, one that needs someone more reliable. maybe.
this could go in a number of threads but here goes. yeah, i haven't been around in a while (thank Sarge for motivating me to this post as he contacted me on fb and not in so many words said it's not the same around here....BIG hand shake and thank you sir! Lola Bunny too!)
here goes.
since roughly early February I have been averaging 55-60 hour work weeks and with the overtime i have been paying off past fuck up debts and what not but that's the best part of it.
you see it's like this. just because i am loyal to my career and job, especially since they let me get back into the industry before i could pass a b/g check, does NOT give my department manager/lead permission to treat me, or any other co-worker for that matter, like shit.
Sunday prior to Memorial Day I went to the ER with what I thought was a heart attack. some of y'all saw this on my fb but i digress. the pressure that i have been under in the last several months at work finally caught up and i admit that i can only handle so much and that sunday was one straw shy of breaking that dang hump day camels' back. yeah, that came this last friday. not once during the week (my g/f and now life partner, Leigh, called both the engineer i work with and the department lead to let them know that i was having what we thought was a heart attack.
turns out that it was nothing more than stress thankfully but that's not the point. when i returned to work never once did my dept lead ask me if i could handle working long hours still or for that matter how i was feeling health wise. i don't want, nor do i require, sugar coatings. having managed crews before i know of all people to find out and pay attention to your crew and their moral.
monday morning i quit my job. flat out quit. my engineer called me asking where i was and why i wasn't at work yet. told him i quit. he said "come again??" i said yep. can't take this bullshit anymore. scheduling is a nightmare, dept lead treats people like shit including you and everyone else. i'm done. i'll be in in the next couple days to turn my laptop in.
with that he wished me well.
5 minutes later dept. lead calls me asking me "wtf are you doing?!?!" i said i can't take your bullshit anymore dude.
last friday he had called me at my desk screaming at me to get out of "his" drawing and the only reason i was in it was to take measurements for a BOM or bill of material to give the contractor an idea of items to purchase to complete the job. anyway, screaming is putting it mildly. i even quoted him on the phone monday morning when he asked for an example. i said....."And I quote...'GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY GODDAMN DRAWING!!! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING IN MY GODDAMN DRAWING?!?!?" to this at the moment i replied alright....fuck you i'll get out of it. then later he calls me again about something else to which i responded "I can't read your fucking mind!"
fuck it. i'm getting even more worked up. i'd not post this but spent too much time typing it. more later.
nutshell is this......he said what do you need.
a couple more days to chill.
go ahead...take them. see you wednesday?
yeah. see you then.
Well damn, Fred. I got nothing for ya, bud. I probably couldn't have held out as long as ya did. Money is one thing, but, bullshit weighs more than money sometimes.
Chill if/while ya can, man. Take it easy as ya can. Breathe for a little while.
Good to hear from ya, even if'n it were bad news. Might turn out to be good news, though. Chin up.:comfort:
I'm glad you're ok plt, seriously.
I hope you gain much relaxation from your time away, but from my experience, and what I've read from you, more than a couple days will be needed to make things right. You said, correctly, understatedly, that they don't have the right to treat you like shit. Damn skippy they don't. But!! unless you stop them, they might well try, on purpose or accidentally, following their own best interests and fuck yours, or from just plain ignorance. You said you can't read they guy's mind; he can't read yours either. Apparently, they *CAN* comprehend when you say fuck off, I quit, so... you have some channel of communication open, at least.
Man, there ain't no-body gonna look after you, in the workplace, like YOU. YOU train those around you how to treat you, and it sounds like the lesson you gave them finally clicked for them. JFC, plt, don't take their shit, life is too fucking short. Don't let those fuckers make your life shorter.
Ty grave and v I hear you. And you are 100% right. Guess lead thought that since I have done time...could be over thinking this.....that he thinks he can treat me like shit. Or thought. He's an alpha and so am I however I have always let him run the show because it's his to run. I do have respect for the man in what he can juggle but s.o.b. has bit off more than he/we can handle. We do the impossible in getting jobs out. 2 weeks from scratch to finish on a facility phase II expansion. Released half week ago friday (in 4 days) and the rest last friday.
On the droid now so editing is limited so to speak due to laziness. On the driveway having a nice cigar from Paul, my roommate, and trying to chillax. Need a vacation though. You nailed that one.
Dude, I'm so sorry to hear about your situation. I thought Leigh was gonna get you to smoke less! Hhehe....I tease. That was no way to quit. Hopefully you can work things out. It was suck to lose a job, but it also sucks to work in a horrible condition. Good luck!
They NEED you. They can't afford to lose you. If they are that busy they are going to be willing to make some slight changes to accommodate you.
If you are going back in there tomorrow morning, it's the perfect opportunity to explain to them just how much you are willing to put up with, and that you are willing to walk away.
You have a lot more power than you may think if you talk to them in a clear way about what you will put up with.
What glatt said. When you threaten to quit and they don't hand you your hat and coat, they don't want you to quit, which means leverage. Make the most of it to create an environment you can work in. Good luck!
They NEED you. They can't afford to lose you. If they are that busy they are going to be willing to make some slight changes to accommodate you.
If you are going back in there tomorrow morning, it's the perfect opportunity to explain to them just how much you are willing to put up with, and that you are willing to walk away.
You have a lot more power than you may think if you talk to them in a clear way about what you will put up with.
I don't want leverage. That means that I have or they have an upper hand. I want TEAMWORK. Too much to ask?
You have the leverage to ask for teamwork.
Gratitude is noble but can't come before your health, physical or mental. Take care of yourself. :chill:
You have the leverage to ask for teamwork.
SMRT. Good luck man.
What Glatt said, what Ali said!
Sent by thought transference
That really sucks pi! What happened to people that respect someone that is helping them? :eyebrow:
I don't want leverage. That means that I have or they have an upper hand. I want TEAMWORK. Too much to ask?
There's no I in team and
There's no U in their team.
true that foot. and guess what? why should i be surprised that there is a fb troll on my account? i'm home now for the rest of the week. meeting this morning was nothing short of a disaster for me. i allowed the tables to be turned. please, anyone on my fb here understand that i will not be posting there for some time to come. unless it's an overly funny joke. i can't resist those. :) ty and carry on :)
oh, and foot? there is an I in team. it's in the A hole lol.
One of my favorites! I had that posted on my last construction gig.
Every ten years UK Driving Licences have to be renewed with an updated photo.
Cost of photo to required spec: £6.99. They come in sheets of six and, of course, I only needed one.
Cost of renewal: £20.00
Postage: £0.62
Total: £27.61 or $46.84.
Rearrange these words into a well known phrase or saying: Off, Rip.
One is not a happy Englishman.
OK ladies, first come first serve, but remember Carruthers only has 5 extra photos...
[SIZE="1"]autographs and postage extra[/SIZE]
OK ladies, first come first serve, but remember Carruthers only has 5 extra photos...
[SIZE="1"]autographs and postage extra[/SIZE]
Even by the usual standards of driving licence or passport photos, it was a real horror. No, I mean a
REAL horror.
The remaining prints are under lock and key.
I'm warming up the shredder.:thepain:
Thats nothing. In Aus, you renew every 5 years and it costs almost $200. Stay in the UK. Haha
Thats nothing. In Aus, you renew every 5 years and it costs almost $200. Stay in the UK. Haha
Had to look that up. It's about £110!
Our impost would appear to be something of a bargain in comparison.
Even by the usual standards of driving licence or passport photos, it was a real horror. No, I mean a REAL horror.
I just renewed my C.C. permit and hey say sit there, pointing at a chair, grab your picture with a webcam type thingy, and you don't see it until you get the laminated card a couple weeks later.
In fairness though, when they do the driver's license pictures they attempt to show me on the monitor and ask if it's OK. I tell them I don't care because I don't give a shit if the cop thinks I'm attractive.
I'm not blowing him to avoid a ticket... but I don't tell them that. :lol:
I'm not blowing him to avoid a ticket... but I don't tell them that. :lol:
Then, exactly, WHY are you blowing him?:p:
No reason for "they" to know, what arrangement two consenting adults, "him" and myself, have agreed to... like he's got to take me in his cruiser while I work the siren... or something. :p:
A new euphemism - "blowing the siren"...........
Apparently i am abusive and some other bad things for blowing off steam here and saying i should have married a tradesman.
In the spirit of posting on the internet to people neither of us will probably ever meet, i am sorry. I shouldnt make jokes about the things that frustrate me, even if it is annonymously.
What i am most upset about is that the one place i had to go to vent has been taken from me. Maybe people shouldnt spy on others.
I suppose i will have to censor my thoughts here too.
I hate my life. I wish i were dead.
At the risk of tromping in where I shouldn't:
So, he saw what you'd written and all he saw was the insult to him, not the fact that his wife is clearly very unhappy. Great priorities.
I hate my life. I wish i were dead.
This too will pass, hon.
You
are
a
good
person.
What you might or migt not say here is shooting the breeze.
Fishing talk.
shine on Aliantha
At the risk of tromping in where I shouldn't:
So, he saw what you'd written and all he saw was the insult to him, not the fact that his wife is clearly very unhappy. Great priorities.
.
You
are
a
good
person.
What you might or might not say here is shooting the breeze.
Fishing talk.
shine on Aliantha
What they said. Big hugs to you, Ali! XXX
I'm sorry, Ali. I wish it could have been an opportunity to open conversation, rather than another fight. Just remember that even when all else has gone to shit, Max and Eva love you, and need you, and need you to not be dead.
I'm sorry, Ali. I wish it could have been an opportunity to open conversation, rather than another fight.
Lord no, then she might become cupcake queen, successful, wealthy and independent... worse, a threat to the status quo. :unsure:
Ali you know in your heart dead is not going to be as much fun as alive. This will pass I promise. When your business gets going you will be busy and happy. {{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}
Thanks everyone. I will be fine.
Today I am mostly just angry. I gave up so much for my husband. Even my mental health. It's time to take it all back, starting today. No one else is going to be in charge of my life but me. I will not sit around idly hoping he doesn't leave me because I am such a bad person. That's only his perspective, which imo is warped to begin with.
Anyway, it's time to take back control of my life. Starting today.
I will not be caught unprepared for anything.
... I will not be caught unprepared for anything.
You mean like if he wants to take you to a deep lake or fast moving river, let's say for a day of fishing; but, doesn't bring a fishing rod for you :eek: ... you'll bring your own, right?
haha...I will be prepared for anything. Even that. I could even get my own bait!
I hate my life. I wish i were dead.
Not to get all grammar nazi on you, Ali, but you spelled 'he' wrong.
;)
Well we may have some problems, but i dont want him dead. Haha
On the bright side, he apologised unreservedly yesterday and took himself to the doctor to sort out some counselling.
I hope it helps.
Oh that's really good. Hope things start to settle down for you guys :)
Thanks Dana. Me too. I am exhausted.
That's a big step. I hope it goes well for you both.
he apologised unreservedly yesterday and took himself to the doctor to sort out some counselling.
That surprises me. Good for him, and I hope it does him and you and your marriage a world of help.
Good luck to the both of you x
Sent by thought transference
Thanks. It's been too long coming. I have been asking him to do this for 10 years now. Pretty much since we first met and he started telling me about his life.
A lot of damage has been done. Honestly, I'm not sure if I will be able to look at him the same way again. I feel very dead in my heart about my marriage at the moment.
For now I am just focussing on the kids and my work and waiting to see if there are any noticeable changes. I know he's trying to fix the damage he has done, but there's a part of my heart that's telling me it's too little too late.
Time will tell. Maybe we will fall in love again. We can only hope.
I feel very [strike]dead[/strike] disappointed in my heart about my marriage at the moment.
The change will be so welcome it will rekindle your fires. [SIZE="1"]optimistic romantic[/SIZE]:thumb:
Maybe, like in my marriage, time will pass and so will your memory. At least until the next time.
Maybe it's just disappointment. Honestly, I know he's not a bad person. He just has a lot of shit that needs dealing with, but I can't even bring myself to care about that compassionately at the moment. I've lost my immediate need to be angry now at least. Usually I can put myself in other people's shoes pretty easily, and that helps me deal with negative emotions better. At the moment, they just don't fit, or I can't be bothered even trying. Not exactly sure really. That's what I mean about feeling dead in my heart. I don't even think I'd care if he came home and said he was leaving. I'd just get on with it. Maybe that's not how I really feel, but it's what my conscious mind is telling right now.
Maybe, like in my marriage, time will pass and so will your memory. At least until the next time.
That's what's been going on for a few years now Pico. It was just the most recent blow up felt like it really sucked the last vestiges of love out of me. You know when you get to that stage where you just feel like enough is enough and you're not willing to compromise even a little bit anymore? That's how I feel at the moment. I feel like I am just going to live my life, and if he can't fit into it on my terms, then that's his problem to deal with and I don't care anymore. I hope these feelings change for me. It's not a nice feeling.
I hope his counselor is smart and experienced and helps him see clearly. And I hope you get past the exhausted feeling and have some joy and excitement in your success with your new business, and that that will bring good things into the rest of your life.
I'm sorry if any of my comments have caused problems. You are a very important person to so many of us. I will never forget what you did for me. Hang in there
Thanks Ortho. :)
I wouldn't think so Sarge. You're only ever lovely. :)
The thing that actually caused the blow up was the comment I made about how I should have married a tradesman, and then suggested I should have an affair with one instead.
I wondered why he had all of a sudden started mowing the grass etc, but why he seemed to be doing it, not because it's the right thing, but because he expected me to say something about it. Turns out he's been reading my posts here lately and saw some offhand comments he didn't like, so instead of talking to me about it, he stewed on it for weeks until it all came out in a vitriolic attack, full of accusations that anyone in their right mind knew couldn't be true. So, I will try not to say dumb stuff anymore, but that probably wont work, because that's who I am. I make jokes about things that bother me. A joke is a joke though. He for some reason felt it would affect his professional reputation. That's what he said anyway. I explained to him that if I'm posting anonymously, then how can that possibly be true. I explained to him about how I vent with you people because you are all so far away, have no real life ties to either of us other than those we generate through the mail from time to time, so really, it's the perfect place. I explained to him how you people are for the most part, educated, sensible, witty people who I enjoy interacting with on a fairly regular basis. Then I asked if he wanted to take that away from me too.
Why am I saying all this? I don't know. Still trying to process it I think. Maybe I will get some counselling too. It is probably unreasonable to expect you guys to fix this problem for me, and unlikely that I'll be able to do it myself. Anyway, I just want you all to know that none of you have ever said or done anything inappropriate. Even when a few of you have made a few lewd comments from time to time, I have always known they were just for fun. I have never read anything more than friendship into any of my relationships here.
You people are important to me. None of you need to change anything about how you interact with me. I'll have to come over there and kick your arses if you do. :)
... You people are important to me. None of you need to change anything about how you interact with me. I'll have to come over there and kick your arses if you do. :)
If you'll make it a spanking, I'll start being nice to you.
harsh lessons for teenagers. No matter how hard you work and how skilled you are, athletes whose families have money can somehow almost always find a way to triumph :(
That lesson plays out in so many arenas that teenagers would be best advised to just learn it.One of the best arguments for junior athletics.
Yeah, I have seen the same thing happen with musicians, actors, artists and even academics. Almost every area. One of the most prominent of course is politics. If you can't raise the funds to get your word out there, no one knows to vote for you.
Anyway, it's a tough lesson, but a good one to learn. Always heartbreaking for the parent to watch though. :(
So, I will try not to say dumb stuff anymore, but that probably wont work, because that's who I am. I make jokes about things that bother me.
I think it's human nature to rant/rave/joke about dumb shit, just blowing off steam. Whereas things that are really serious get mentioned in passing, but we tend to play those close to the vest.
England lost.
Not a great surprise, but as before they got my hopes up when Rooney equalised.
So not a big upset.
But I'd just read about the Red Wedding. AND found out who the spy in Daenrys's camp is.
The dirty, dirty bastards.
Seriously, how much is a woman supposed to be able to deal with in a single day?
Turns out he's been reading my posts here lately and saw some offhand comments he didn't like, so instead of talking to me about it, he stewed on it for weeks until it all came out in a vitriolic attack, full of accusations that anyone in their right mind knew couldn't be true
And did you talk to him about wishing you had a manlier man? Or did you just 'vent' that to us? We, who are not real?
I told you that what you said sounded cunty. I had no idea. I really think you should check yourself.
Usually, when a friend is telling you about the predicament they are in, or what a cocksucker their spouse is, you automatically relate to the person giving you their side of the story. I gotta tell you. I feel bad for Dazza. Fucking guy reads what you wrote and somehow decides that He? Needs therapy? Jesus Harold Christ.
Is there any facet of your relationship problems that are caused by things that YOU should do differently? Any changes in the way the relationship should be that need to take place in your camp?
At all?
Doesn't that word, 'should' just fuck everything up? He should be more handy. He should make more money. He should be more attentive.
Cry me a fucking river, sweetheart.
Whooooo.... I may be projecting a little here.... Well, anyway.
Fix your gaze on his values, not his shortcomings. He's not superman. And he's put up with your fucking ass for how long? Give the man some credit.
Go buy that book I told you about, sit the fuck down at some point in your... oh so hectic... unemployed fucking day, with a pencil and a notebook, and do the work.
Not even kidding, Ali. I may be anonymous, I may be a cyber buddy.... But that may just mean that I'm the only one with balls enough to tell you what a child you're being. Probably because, while I love you, I don't really like you much.... It's kind of similar to family ties. Anyway.... You go to that counselor with him. And when he or she lays most on this at your feet, be WOMAN enough to own it.
And you wish you were dead?
REALLY???
it's not OK to use that after the age of 12.
This is you at your absolute worst.
Get your shit together immediately!
Ah, but the cupcakes, that's, that's where I had her, she laughed at me and made jokes, but I proved beyond the shadow of a doubt, with geometric logic, that a duplicate topping of the creamy filling did exist, and I've had produced that topping if they hadn't pulled the eggbeater out of action. I, I know now she only trying to protect some other recipe. [He pauses - looked at all the questioning faces that stared back at him, and realizes that he has been ranting and raving] Naturally, I can only cover these things from memory. If I left anything out, why, just ask me specific questions and I'll be glad to answer them.
The Four Horsemen: Recognizing Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling
(the four horsemen are four communication styles that can predict the end of a relationship)
I like that article. Thanks, Toad.
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My ex had contempt for me and I sort of bought into it and it was horrible.
That's how abusers do it. Make the victim have contempt for themselves, then whatever horrid thing happens next (violence, for example) is only what they deserve ...
Wow, LJ, so because you really don't like Ali much, you allowed yourself to respond to her in a real dickish way?.
Ali, he does, however, have some really good points. But mostly, I think you are responding out of a depressive state that is totally counter-productive. I don't fault you for saying you wish you were dead, because, really, all you are saying is that you wish things would change.
Now that you have acknowledged that, start working on it and keep working on it. :)
Good Luck, Ali.
Wow, LJ, so because you really don't like Ali much, you allowed yourself to respond to her in a real dickish way?.
I don't know that I would necessarily connect those two particular dots. I responded in a dickish way because all the mollycoddling and sympathizing just seems to be making her whine more about her rotten life. Seems from here that she's got too much time on her hands to dwell on every little non perfect aspect of her daily. from the boys not helping her with the household chores, to a general malaise of her lot, to her husband not being ideal. I've tried offering suggestions.. you've all tried identifying and commiserating... That's just feeding the vacuum, it seems.
It's hard to get perspective sometimes. Whether you're being manipulated by an abuser, or doing the abusing yourself... if you're whining... and that whining is reaffirmed by people that are getting half the story.... then you're going to feel justified in your reactions. But maybe if someone shakes you up a bit and you stop and look at how cunty you're being.... maybe you can save your marriage.
but then, maybe you just want out. like many women your age... your clock is ticking, and you start looking at the other side of the pasture with all that green grass.
Sorry, if I've come off dickish, but I'm clearly identifying with Dazza here. I think maybe I should STFU at this point. eh?
Oh, I don't know, jim. I like your balls. Um, er...you know what I mean.
As a woman (gosh I always hate when comments start out with 'as a _____') I feel for Dazza too. If I read something hurtful my SO said about me to a bunch of people online, I'd reserve my right to feel hurt. Couldn't he have had the respect to say it to me, with all the 'talking about it' that I have demanded from him?
Anyway, no one can see inside any others' relationship, but I think you, jim, made some points that needed to be made. In your gloriously 'dickish' way (not really, I don't think you're dickish.)
"Yeah, I said it, it needed to be said..." --Chris Rock
Sometimes venting is just that venting... Women [some most?] don't think anyone can fix their problem but it helps them to talk about it. Men vent because they want someone to help them and that's what [some/ most?] women do. [/of my opinion no one asked for...]
If you are all imaginary anyway, and one of you slights another one isn't it an imaginary slight?
You've been married--in what way is the impact of those different from the impact of "real" slights?
Stonewalling occurs [COLOR="SandyBrown"]when[/COLOR] the listener withdraws from the interaction.
Stonewalling occurs [COLOR="sandybrown"]because[/COLOR] the listener has learned anything they say will eventually be used against them.
FFS Jim. At what point did I say that the problems in our marriage are all his fault? Didn't you already have a say about what you thought anyway.
Honestly, you have a really short memory. I recall plenty of people here being incredibly supportive of you during the end of your marriage. At least I didn't start a whole fucking thread about it. I came in here. I said what's upsetting my in the thread entitled the same. WTF is wrong with that. You object to people caring and supporting me? You somehow think (because you don't like me or something) that it's your right to put me in my place. Yeah, fuck you dick.
Just so you know, I am very hopeful that once my husband has found a therapist he likes and gets himself to a stage where he's ready to deal with other stuff too, that I will be asked to come in for some sessions also. I have asked him to, and he has agreed, on numerous occasions that he needs help to deal with issues from his own past. I'm not going to talk about that here, because quite frankly, it's none of your fucking business and you clearly don't give a fuck anyway, so do me a favour, either be supportive or GTFO of it. I don't need anyone else to tell me what a failure i am. I'm quite capable of doing that myself at the moment.
Oh and if you want to go read it again, you'll see where I've admitted it was a dumb thing to say etfuckingcetera.
Fuck this place. No wonder I hardly ever tell anyone shit, and the few occasions that I do, people like you want to be arseholes about it.
Just fuck you. That's all I have to say to you right now.
You're right. Of course I don't know nearly enough about it to comment accurately. Probably most of my rant was directed at jinx. But I said what I said, and I don't take it back. Except for not liking you much. I was just pissed off. I like you fine. You're a decent sort.
I responded to the sense I have of your situation. Maybe... Probably, I have not read everything you've said on the subject, because I only read 30% of the threads these days. And even if I had, the info would still be incomplete.
I do think your outlook about it is negative. You don't like him right now. His jokes are not funny. His foibles are frustrating, not endearing.
You can either change your perspective or your situation. Changing dazza is not the answer.
Sorry you're mad. I was a tad over the line. I just hit a point, you know?
Thanks for that.
No one's perfect.
I am trying to be patient. I am trying to value my husband. I am trying to help him understand the things that bother me. He doesnt ever say what he wants or needs. I have no idea what's going on in his head and i just think he doesnt know how to express himself to me or anyone on an intimate level. That is what i see. I wish i knew what he sees. That is why we're in trouble. If only one person says what they want, the relationship is not balanced. He gets frustrated because he thinks he can never please me. I get frustrated because i really dont give a fuck if he mows the grass or not. I would just like him to be involved in the process of getting it mowed. If that makes sense, then you might start to understand better and judge me less.
I suppose LJ is off her distribution list now ... that means more cupcakes for the rest of us, alllriiiiiiiiiiight! :D
Dazza never made us cupcakes. :eyebrow:
Ali has been more than patient in this exchange ... yay Ali, you are indeed the better person.
So you wished your husband would step up and get off his f***ing ass once in awhile instead of watching TV and fishing, while you rear 5 kids and start a successful independent business all on your own. Wishing that the guy who is an equal partner in producing some of the kids, and who married you knowing about the existing children, would pull his own weight is cunty? No, I don't think so.
So, what, guys, no not 'guys', YOU, LJ, YOU in particular, you think that a woman who is doing all that Ali is doing is whining and being unfair when her partner refuses to engage or take any responsibility?
You've already admitted that you projected your hostility and bitterness toward your ex onto Ali. I think you owe her a BIG fucking apology. You just read your own angst and hurt into her story and let loose on her, said stupid and frankly outrageous things to her, and now expect to get a pass? You are very damned lucky she even responds to you now.
I'm going to hide under a rock till this is over
No need, Sarge. Pandas are exempt until proven otherwise.
I think ortho is a big fake.
Oh gee, I'm sorry. Should I feel badly about saying that?
Can't fall back to sleep. I'm itching everywhere, perhaps psychological or not. Feeling so weary when I sit up but so awake when I lie down. Sigh...
Btw, stop fighting, y'all. Aliantha is tired enough with everything going on in her life. She deserves some peace.
Ali: Hugzzz...good luck, hon. I hope everything will work out. We all deserves to be happy.
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No one needs to hide or do anything. I appreciate the support. I really do. I realise Jim can say what he likes. He's entitled just like everyone else. He has made his peace. I am ok with it. Let's not fight. I just needed to vent. Clearly to some i came off badly. Maybe they are right. If so, maybe i will figure it out and fix it. Maybe they are wrong and i just didnt give them enough info to understand fully. Basically, i am on the inside of this. I have to deal with it as best i can. I am trying to be positive about all aspects of my life. I am hoping that will help.
I am a big girl. I will fight whatever battles i need to in order to get things on track. I just dont want to fight you guys. Please be patient.
I am trying to be positive about all aspects of my life. I am hoping that will help.
This is good advice for everyone, everywhere.
"I am determined to be cheerful and happy in whatever situation I may find myself. For I have learned that the greater part of our misery or unhappiness is determined not by our circumstance but by our disposition." --Martha Washington
LJ, I owe you an apology for going off on you like that. You and Ali have talked out your issue and it's no one else's business. I'm sorry. That extra glass of wine last night was not a good thing. :redface:
But Ortho, what's the Cellar good for if you can't get distracted from your own problems by kibitzing on someone else's. :haha:
Again, I raise the call for a Posting While Drunk icon.
We seriously need a PWD icon.
I don't know where else to put this. My neighbor lady just came to tell me another neighbor passed away this morning. These are the folks I would hang out with around the fire. This guy was a Vietnam veteran, and a music aficionado. We once talked for hours about different musicians. He really liked me...told me I was the first woman he's flirted with in years (he would say funny things to me, but all in good humor.) I liked him a lot...not in a romantic way. I considered him a friend. One of the few people I really knew around here.
Rest in Peace, Stan. You were loved. :(
Goddammit I can't lose many more people. I've done little but go to funerals in the last couple years. Shit. His roommate is going to have a very hard time. Shit shit shit.
I'm sorry IM. I was happy for you that time you posted about sitting around the fire. Sounded like good times. I'm sorry you're losing such a cool guy.
Thanks.
Was just sitting with the neighbors, who were basically his family. Trying to figure out what sort of arrangements, etc. We don't know any of his next of kin.
I just went to the funeral of another friend last week, who was a Vietnam veteran. I don't think there's anything more beautiful than the 21 gun salute. We don't know if the VA will help with a service or what.
Do any of our cellar servicemen or women know about this sort of thing?
contact your nearest vfw or american legion. they do a great job in our area
If he is being buried at a Veterans Cemetery, that's part of the package...at least it was back home when my dad died four years ago.
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I don't think there's anything more beautiful than the 21 gun salute.
Only the president receives a 21 gun salute. Soldiers get 3 volleys of rifle fire
Doesn't look like VA helps much
http://www.benefits.va.gov/compensation/claims-special-burial.asp
what about a GoFundMe account or whatever it is?
Are the polics looking for next of kin?
Oh, sorry Sarge. I misspoke. I thought the 3 fires of 7 rifles was what a 21 gun salute was. I hope I didn't offend anyone.
Yeah, they're looking for next of kin. I'm about ready to head back down there to see if anyone has found anything out. I'll mention contacting the VFW or Legion, Sarge.
Thanks for the support, folks.
the 3 volley fires from anywhere from 3 to 7 soldiers is very significant. it is based on the 3 volley fire to end a truce to collect the dead and wounded. so, the funeral volley symbolizes the veteran is safe and in the care of his comrades
sorry for sounding like a smart ass.
No, Sarge, I appreciate the clarification.
So there was some estranged family who showed up. They wanted 'things.' LIke he had a lot of 'things.' They don't plan on any funeral of any kind, saying they can't afford it...all the while this estranged sister asking about a life insurance policy he had some time ago (and he probably cashed in.) We plan to have our own memorial amongst us. WTF is wrong with people?
I thought about the 'go fund me' thing, monster. I don't know that Stan would have wanted that. WE would like to see a service, but the funeral is for the people left behind. It breaks my heart to think that there won't be that respect shown for a paratrooper in the Vietnam war. Yet, Stan being such a private person, maybe he would have appreciated OUR efforts even more.
My dear neighbor lady is elderly, and she took care of Stan and Stan's roommate and another neighbor guy, and they took care of her. She's also become a surrogate mom to me. They're all really good folks. She's hurting, more so about the lack of compassion from his so-called family, I can tell, but you don't make it to 78 years old without knowing pain. I hope I can be stronger too in the years ahead of me.
These are the reasons we cherish family, when so many don't know what it feels like. I don't know the backstories, don't care to because it's not my business. I know how people treat me, and others around them.
I'm gonna miss that silly funny guy. And we, as some weird sort of community, are going to celebrate that life.
Thanks for the venue to talk about this.
paratrooper? you need to get the parachute soldiers from the dollar store and use them as part of your tribute.
You would do the GoFundMe not as "pay for this guy's funeral" but for you lot.... "We really want to say goodbye to our friend as befits his awesomeness, nothing fancy but not a pauper's deal...."
Sounds like a situation spinning right out of control.:(
Has to, or it'll get swept under the rug.
Someone who steals to survive, help them.
Someone who steals for a living, prosecute them.
Looters? Shoot 'em... and leave their body lay in the street until kin, or feral dogs, claim it.
I foutred le camp last Saturday. Things went to shit in in instant. [COLOR=lemonchiffon]How much fun working with angry drunks [/COLOR][COLOR=black]More details later. I'm back at home now.[/COLOR]
Rat fuck, foots, just rat fuck. :(
Sounds horrible. Sorry it was so bad you had to part ways.
I foutred le camp last Saturday...
You fucked off last Saturday?
[ATTACH]48852[/ATTACH]
Welcome to my world.
In my appointment with the specialist nurse yesterday she dropped into conversation that the waiting time for detox/ rehab is 2-3 MONTHS not 2-3 weeks as I originally understood.
No surprise this hit me like Mohammed Ali, and being so knocked out I could not articulate well enough to even challenge it. Partly from shock - my stomach dropped in a fight or flight response - partly still trying to maintain the veneer of sanity but partly because of the sheer embarrassment of having misunderstood.
I then came home for a rotten afternoon of self-hating and assuming I was wrong. Then that I was crazy. Then that in fact I was right and this was all a test because so many things have been brought up in one meeting and then never referred to again/ not happened. I suppose the final stage was they think it's convenient to pretend with me because I pretend along.
How confident am I that I was told 2-3 weeks? 75%
How much do I believe there was a genuine misunderstanding on my part? 10%
How well do I think I am being supported currently? 5%
Once again, I was told I would get a text regarding how my application was progressing.
And this was from the nurse I first met back when I was in hospital, so that's back in July and I have seen her every week. The nurse I saw last week was a fill-in, so when she didn't follow through on her promise I thought it was just lack of care. It feels worse this time.
It just drags on and on and on.
Shit, Sundae. I'm sorry.
It's pretty ridiculous they make you wait for such important treatment.
I must have missed something. Why do you need rehab Sundae? I thought things were travelling fairly well.
Sundae - chin up, shoulders back. It must be incredibly hard to be going through this. Remember you have one thing going for you that so many others don't, you have the love and support from friends in so may countries. We love you
This is the frustration and upset of universal health care. We never seem able to do it right. When it's for-profit, people suffer. When it's universal, people suffer.
No matter what, people do not have access. In Ontario, the mantra is 'health insurance does not mean access to health care'. It seems that's not unique.
I have no idea how to make care available in a timely way for those who need it. In every system, people fall through the cracks. :(
Nevertheless, wishing you great luck, quick access, and the best of care, Sundae. Sending love and hugs. xxoo
Is there something we can do to help?
There's a reason people refer to mental health as the cinderella of the NHS.
Goddamnit, Sundae - I'm gutted for you.
Is there something we can do to help?
Just don't forget me.
Just don't forget me.
We won't!
You can be sure of that. :thumb:
Just don't forget me.
We will not.
Just don't forget me.
I won't forget you.
Wouldn't be possible. Keep fighting the good fight, Sundae.
I wont forget you Sundae. Or the letter I promised your Mum. Xx
Just don't forget me.
Never ever. EVER.
And I know this is hard, but I know you are tough. Thanks for being so tough. And posting. Especially posting.
Just don't forget me.
Do you really think my kids or me could ever forget you??:3eye:
What's all this? I don't keep up well enough. Where are you going? Links?
No one will ever forget you, Sundae.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Sundae.
Sundae who?
I fucking can't believe you forgot already!
But seriously. We are rooting for you.
So, trip to the 'rents over the Bank Holiday weekend.
I didn't exactly disgrace myself, but neither did I cover myself in glory, going AWOL with some ex work colleagues for a few hours and scaring Mum. Also coming home a little dazed and confused.
Anyway, my plan to upload all my photos hit a big Fail as Dad managed to bugger up the phones by trying to install new ones. Knocked out the satellite TV and t'internet.
Steven got them back up again the next day, but I was on my home by then.
To find a letter from St Anne's on the mat. For my assessment. Yay, first sign of progress.
I did smile when it advised not to turn up *too* intoxicated as it may make assessment difficult. Sorry but if you are capable of reading the letter and finding your way there (shit buses, Leeds) then I figure you can manage an assessment.
Still, it's at 15.30 on Friday so I shouldn't judge. I've woken up at 03.30 and proceeded to get wankered when things were at their worst.
Have come home with a fascinating collection of bruises and marks from dragging my bag across London and Leeds. Literally dragging - stupid wheels bust. So what with the nosebleed on the way down, which I had to mop up with a pair of knickers as I didn't pack tissues, and my festering collection of cold sores, I think it's safe to say you wouldn't touch me with someone else's right now. Although if you was a nice lady you might pat my pastel pink head and give me 50p for a cup of tea.
On a brighter note, we went round to see The Girls on Friday night. The ones I've cooked for at Mum's before. And J refused to let us go until I sang for them. Twicet. Although I pretended not to remember the end of each song, out of consideration for Mum. I think a husband with Alzheimers, a depressed alike pink haired daughter and a bunion operation are enough for one woman to deal with,let alone putting up with show tunes.
What does St. Ann's assess? Do they want you to turn up a little drunk?
I'm glad you've got an appointment this week though. Progress!
great to see you got an appointment. you know we are all pulling for you
St Anne's is a specialist addiction centre in Leeds.
I'll have an officially supervised medical detox, then 13-15 weeks rehab, including living in "practice accommodation". All in-patient, and in case that term doesn't translate it means I don't go home. Although towards the end of the stay patients are encouraged to socialise and lay down the foundations for alcohol free living.
They simultaneously treat a number of mental health disorders on the understanding that people who use any substance to escape their lives probably have underlying problems too.
I've read the website (you can find it too just from what I've posted here) but I will find out what applies to me and how on Friday. I was scared of the assessment, but Nurse A said she'd only known one patient to be rejected and that was due to a history of violence including an ongoing court case. Someone wise did tell me that the unit wouldn't have referred me if I didn't have a chance of being accepted, but hey - paranoia comes with the package right now.
great to see you got an appointment. you know we are all pulling for you
Pulling what Sarge? Pulling what?
:p
He's not pulling it for me any more, he has a new trophy GF :mecry:
Sundae - do you really think anyone could replace you?
Of course not. I leave a Cherry sized hole whenever I leave.
Happy for you, Sundae. A big, double bear hug for you. You're not being paranoid. You're worried, and that's normal. Good luck! I hope all goes well.
Thanks Bunny.
But the truth is I am paranoid, goes with the dependency.
And it is hard for me to work out what is real from what is created in my head on a bad day.
The binmen are not out to get me.
The binmen are not out to get me.
The binmen are not out to get me.
There really was pasta in my Caesar salad instead of croutons though (WTF?!)
Sundae you are in our prayers.
I did smile when it advised not to turn up *too* intoxicated as it may make assessment difficult. Sorry but if you are capable of reading the letter and finding your way there (shit buses, Leeds) then I figure you can manage an assessment.
What does St. Ann's assess? Do they want you to turn up a little drunk?
It's an interesting kind of middle-ground patient they serve, the kind that knows they have a problem but is also aware that they can't beat it alone. Often you're talking about high-functioning addicts, who can adjust their level of intoxication on a day-to-day basis, as long as they're not being asked to go cold turkey. When daily intoxication is a way of life, you start to make weird rules about what you will or will not do, perhaps just to exert what little control you can over the situation. I once watched a show profiling meth users, and they talked to a married couple living in absolute squalor and shooting up 3-4 times per day. And this couple spoke earnestly about how the husband always takes the first hit, so if it's a bad batch that kills him the wife will know not to take it. In their warped world, this was not only logical, but evidence of his profound love for her. So yeah, I bet if you asked that couple not to show up *too* intoxicated, they could probably say, "Okay, cool, we'll take our first morning hit at 9am and that way we'll just be coming off it by noon, perfect timing."
I didn't mean to mock them. And you've hit the nail on the head, Clod. It's why I've fallen between two stools (sometimes literally) in trying to get treatment in the past.
I might only shower once a week when things are bad, but you can bet it would be on a day I was going to see Dana or going for an appointment. I'm not actually a dirty person, but I sure as hell live like one when I'm under the cosh.
I always accepted I had a warped view of the world, I'm now admitting I live in the warped world of an addict.
Part of my problem in getting the medical profession to take me seriously is because I don't have a history of being in social care, I have no police record, I have not been abused or an abuser. I rate on the same level as a yummy mummy who likes a few too many glasses of wine on a stressful evening. But I'm not. I'm someone with a serious problem who has had luck and friends/ family keeping my head above water for years. I don't mean enabling, I genuinely mean saving me until it looks like I'll get effective care.
So I'll go with my bruises, my cold sores, my eyes like pissholes in the snow, my ever present jaundice, but I'll be freshly washed and scrubbed and probably even free of cat hairs. And not *too* intoxicated to undertake an assessment :cool:
I hope they give you all the care you need Sundae. xx
Very little is going right, right now. The huge weight of getting my rehab date has been lifted, but like a stone it's exposed lots of creepy little things underneath.
As well asthe Diz issue, although that's the biggie.
Had a letter this morning telling me my gastroscopy appointment has been relocated.
Oh right.
It's Wednesday, the appointment is Friday, and it's been moved to Leeds.
£3.90 bus fare away. And I have to hold another £3.90 in reserve to go in on Tuesday.
Now that might sound like nothing, but when you're living on practically nothing, desperately sorting out bills and toiletries and things for a three month stay, that's a right pain in the arse.
FTR the appointment was originally scheduled for the hospital just outside Otley, which is an easily walkable two miles.
Going to go home and phone them. Which fills me with The Fear.
Thing is I can't even put it off, really, because you follow a strict programme and routine once you've been admitted. I don't think St Anne's would be best impressed if I turned up and said "Oh btw, I need a day off for an appointment I decided to cancel before I came in so I could buy some shampoo and toothpaste."
It's all getting overwhelming again.
A crash after the high of being accepted so much sooner than I expected.
Sundae, just one thing at a time hey? You will be able to get away without toothpaste and shampoo. Someone will spot you some when you get there. Go to the appointment and get it out of the way. Diz is the main problem, and i cant sort that one out. Maybe if you could do a doorknock in the area you might find a kind soul. Try the local churches. There has to be some crazy cat ladies around somewhere. Xx
I know chick, and thanks.
I would pretend that this panic and inability to properly assign priorities is due to my mental health, but y'all know me too well.
I've always been like this, but in my defence, it IS worse at present.
And I remember when going up two dress sizes was the end of the world.
This too shall pass.
The Cellar as a sounding board. I know there are many of us who have reason to appreciate that.
Thanks to everyone.
When you're in the midst of it, it's a tough thing to remind yourself that 'this too will pass.' So that's a good step, right there.
When I'm in the midst of it, now that I've pretty much trained myself to remind myself that it will pass, I tend to now think 'until the next time. and the next time after that, and the next time after that.'
That is what I (and perhaps you) need to be very wary of. Because I don't feel stronger each time I beat it. I wait for the infinite numbers of other shoes to drop. Therein lies the danger. This is when I know I have to really work harder...when 'getting through it this time like all the times before' doesn't seem like much.
I don't know. Maybe this helps, or resonates. I often say 'it'll all work out, it always does' but it's hard to see it sometimes, or care, or maybe even want it to.
I am, as are others here and in your 'real' life, on your side. We want to see you succeed. I hope all goes well with Diz and with your treatment. You've got a lot going for you: maybe you'll see that. :hugz:
Tonight the President will go on tv and patiently explain to us why we need more American war-making. How about we do a quick re-read of
War is a Racket by General Smedley Butler before we subject our ears to his nonsense. Haverford man btw.
Thanks Infi.
And everyone else who has supported me here.
I do have some hard work to do on myself, and the opportunity I've been given is exceptional. It's not going to be a walk in the park, just because it's residential it doesn't mean you're cut off from real life. You have responsibilities from the first week and segue back into your "real life" as the weeks progress.
But it's the best chance I've had in years.
Am equally grateful and terrified.
...It's not going to be a walk in the park, just because it's residential it doesn't mean you're cut off from real life. You have responsibilities from the first week and segue back into your "real life" as the weeks progress.
Oh, so you've been accepted MI-6, have to get your license training, then slip back into the mainstream like it never happened.
Probably recruited by Limey. Hmm She could easily be working for either side, even both sides. The force is strong in that one.
Or maybe Carruthers, he has a mysterious past. Obviously spend some time working in Cheyenne Mountain. All that top secret badda boom, stuff. Had a brother-in-law who worked there in the early '60s... been a little off in the head ever since.
"My name's Sundae, I carry a badge."
Or maybe Carruthers, he has a mysterious past.
I'm a man of many parts. Most of them rusty.
"My name's Sundae, I carry a badge."
"My name's Sundae, I carry a spoon."
"My name's Sundae, I carry a calendar."
...
I like yours better. ;)
I have a teaspoon and an open mind.
"I would have liked... to see... Montana."
We are turning into a nation of voyeurs...but not good, honest, sexual voyeurs. No, that's off the table anymore. We're voyeurs via TV shows about what comes out of people's garages, storage units, old barns...what they pawn, what they hoard, how many pets they have.
We are a limp dick nation of consumers, jerking off over what other people own, throw away, or try to hock.
I am on the next UFO out of here.
Surely better than being voyeurs to the latest criminal on the gallows, or the gladiators slashing one another? When physical pain is outlawed as sport, it's only natural for social pain to become the new schadenfreude.
[YOUTUBE]oPJ6yRs1JYY[/YOUTUBE]
Eye on the TV
'cause tragedy thrills me
Whatever flavour
It happens to be like;
Killed by the husband
Drowned by the ocean
Shot by his own son
She used the poison in his tea
And kissed him goodbye
That's my kind of story
It's no fun 'til someone dies
Don't look at me like
I am a monster
Frown out your one face
But with the other
Stare like a junkie
Into the TV
Stare like a zombie
While the mother
Holds her child
Watches him die
Hands to the sky crying
Why, oh why?
'cause I need to watch things die
From a distance
Vicariously I, live while the whole world dies
You all need it too, don't lie
Why can't we just admit it?
Why can't we just admit it?
We won't give pause until the blood is flowing
Neither the brave nor bold
The writers of stories sold
We won't give pause until the blood is flowing
I need to watch things die
From a good safe distance
Vicariously I, live while the whole world dies
You all feel the same so
Why can't we just admit it?
Blood like rain come down
Drawn on grave and ground
Part vampire
Part warrior
Carnivore and voyeur
Stare at the transmittal
Sing to the death rattle
La, la, la, la, la, la, la-lie
Credulous at best, your desire to believe in angels in the hearts of men.
Pull your head on out your hippy haze and give a listen.
Shouldn't have to say it all again.
The universe is hostile. so Impersonal. devour to survive.
So it is. So it's always been.
We all feed on tragedy
It's like blood to a vampire
Vicariously I, live while the whole world dies
Much better you than I
The struggle is necessary. If we don't have it on a visceral level in our real lives, we look for it in the abstract.
We are the protagonist of our own story. Lacking an antagonist, we must create one from what is available. Without a force of nature to overcome, we must create one out of the ether. Without an inner conflict, we must borrow one from our peers.
Otherwise, our story is worthless. Our existence is irrelevant. Our experience is meaningless.
I am who I am because of what I overcame. I am the one who beat this thing or that thing. I am MEeeeeee, goddammit!
There is no light without the dark. We can't feel like good people unless we have bad people to compare ourselves to.
Crazy, right?
I think so....
So?
Love thy nemesis, thy predicament, thy fear, for they define you. Even as much as does thy victory , thy perseverance , thy strength.
Grandmadigr (96 last February) fell at home and broke her hip. The one good one she had left, she broke the other a couple years back. No new hip this time either, they say she's still too old. Still in the hospital, on painkillers atm, which she does not tolerate well at all, she's all loopy and talking to the dead relatives and people we don't know at all. The meds got her wild last night. Auntiedigr, who stayed with her last night, and the night she found her, said she woke up to find Grandmadigr tearing her iv's out, and hollering at Grandpadigr to take her home. Grandpadigr died in 1970. Popdigr and Momdigr are staying with her in the hospital tonight to give Auntiedigr a much-needed break.
I'm hoping she comes through this like she did the last hip, with flying colors. She's a pretty tough old bird.
Oh, grav. I hope she gets real better real soon. :hugz:
Ach, that doesn't sound fun. Poor Grandmadigr - hope she's back up and fighting fit soon *hug*
Poor woman. I'm sorry Grav.
making my cross face at the thought she's too old for a new hip. Hope they can fix her up so she can be happy and get about.
aauuugh...
sorry to hear this news Gravdigr. I'm pulling for her too, she's got a good track record and good people around her. Gonna be alright, gonna be alright. :comfort:
Take her some whisky, Grav.
I know how distressing it is when someone you love goes off their trolley due to hospital treatment. I hope it all settles down quickly, Grav.
Take her some whisky, Grav.
Or a spleef
She's never had a drink, and she's never used tobacco,
or weed.:D
I'm told last night was just hell. Just a constant battle to keep her together. The meds are really doing a number on her. If she can get through this far enough to get her off most of the meds, she'll be a world better.
We will pray for her Gravdigr.
Thanks everyone!
She had a much better night last night, I'm told.
The knock-out dope is finally working out of her system. Happens every time she gets knocked out for anything.
Hope she's coming round - those damn docs just don't get the digr's...
Hope things keep improving, Grav.
Should be finalising my packing.
Should be getting ready.
Frozen with fear instead, brain scrambled. Need someone else to come rescue me, organise me .
Not possible of course, and very childish.
I will get up and get there. That's not in question. But right now it feels impossible.
ok, well what's in the case so far?
She's txtd me to say she's on the bus.
Arrived in Leeds. Had a brief chat on the phone as she was a little early and was waiting for appointment time before checking in.
Oh well thats all good then. :)
Oh hope she's ok. I had intended to get up super early and phone her this mornin - then had a really shitty night and went through the alarm :P Got up nearly 10 am!
This really falls under the category 'small things that are upsetting' but since there's not that specific a thread I'll put it here.
Couldn't sleep early this morning, so thought "hey, I'll make a McDs run." Didn't eat dinner and I figured I'd just get an early start and for some reason a sausage biscuit sounded good (see, there's my first mistake--payback for craving a junk food.)
On my way home my car started shaking and clunking and the engine light was blinking and I was afraid to keep driving but I really had no choice: I'd just hopped in my car for the quick trip, was still in sweats and crappy shoes, and I'd left my cell at home.
Well, got my car home. Cried for a bit. Took a couple sleep aids because 'fuck it' and went back to sleep.
I woke up feeling a little better and thought I'd chance the drive to the shop (it's only a couple miles away) and it was doing all those things I mentioned.
When I started to tell the desk lady what was going on I started crying. Well, I'd just had my car in the shop for 2 weeks and 2 days. I'd just spent shy of 1500 dollars getting everything fixed. I had thought I was good to go and was proud of myself for taking care of it (it's hard to do stuff like that when you're alone. I had to rely on a couple friends to cart me to the grocery store...and asking for help is not my forte.) So here I was again and I was afraid it was dead, ruined. fucked up for good.
The shop owner, who I've known for years, was very nice. He said he thinks it's blah blah blah something about a cylinder 'missing' or not firing or something like that blah blah blah. I don't understand carspeak but he was very very nice and that helped a LOT. They looked at it right away. I told him I was sorry I was upset but...and he goes "Oh, I understand. You just spent all that money on it..." and he had one of his employees take me home.
I've been proud of myself lately because I'm trying really hard to get my shit together. I was so scared my car would be pronounced dead and then what would I do? I guess it still could be but M didn't seem to think it was anything really serious.
But, there it is: I was SORRY for being upset when why should I have been sorry? There is always that nagging feeling deep inside that I am the cause of everything that goes wrong. I don't know why I do that. It's a great burden when you're pretty sure all the ills of the world are your direct responsibility. Of course I'm exaggerating and trying to throw in some levity, but there is that constant feeling of being 'less than' and if I were more, things would be better.
Oh well. That's all. I'm fine and my family is fine and my oldest nephew (and godchild) is getting married to a wonderful girl a week from tomorrow. Life isn't all crap and mud puddles.
I just got really frustrated. :(
Uggh. Car trouble is the suxxor.
I'm glad they are being nice to you, and hope it's an easy fix.
Maybe you weren't sorry about being upset. Maybe you were sorry for not keeping it corked. For making the people you were dealing with have to react to it. That's perfectly reasonable. So is not keeping it corked. So is being upset in the first place.
I hope it's a cheap easy fix.
Thanks guys. I really appreciate it!
Whew. Car is ready. Only charged me for the part (ignition coil) so 63 bucks. See, I sez to myself, see? That warn't so bad.
If you hadn't cried, he would have charged the labor too.
So it was good you showed how upset you were.
There was a scene in the first of the new series of Doctor Who - Clara, the Doctor's companion has been caught by the Clockwork man, and despite being terrified and crying, she manages to talk her way out of him killing her and gets vital info in the process. The Doctor appears with this line:
Ah. Hello, hello, rubbish robots from the dawn of time. Thank you for all the gratuitous information. Five foot one and crying. You never stood a chance
:p
:)
I didn't see my neighbors out, the ones i know anyway, so I went to the restaurant down the street and one of the young ladies who works there was taking a break between the lunch and evening crowd, and was going my way. Sweet kid. She dropped me off to get my car.
I was talking to the shop owner and thanking for being so good about it all. I reminded him of my CRX, years ago, that had broken down. I told them I remember calling and the woman said 'Um, let me go get M." I said it was like being told "You're going to need to talk to the doctor." And indeed he pronounced my car dead. They thought that was funny.
Of course, I was reminded that I have, like, more engine coils, but at least next time I'll know not to panic, if they're systematically breaking. What the heck is an engine coil, anyway? ;)
Thanks all.
It's what makes the spark plug spark.
Cars used to have one coil for the whole engine and the wires for the different cylinders came off of that. Now they seem to mostly have one for each cylinder. More parts to replace as they age. They seemed to work just fine before with the one coil, but now they can make more money off parts.
The coils take the low voltage 12 volts from the battery and turn them into thousands of volts to send to the spark plug. They call them coils because the wires inside are all coiled up. Like in a wall wart.
Ahhh, thanks!
Now, what's a wall wart?
Wall warts are caused by a virus. Well, either that, or picking up frogs. But this strange growth appears in the wall. You can zap it with liquid nitrogen if you have any laying about.
Edit. Or is that lying about?
Coil on plug also eliminates the need for a rotor and distributor. Makes the ignition timing controllable by computer, and this makes it possible for the engine control module to constantly adjust the timing for optimal performance given the current conditions inside the cylinders.
That's what I used to tell customers when I did my feature benefit presentation anyway. Not sure if it's 100% accurate, but it sounds good right?
I also used to tell my male customers that the car has tilt wheel for more head room
And the old women, that there would be a discount if they would take it in the brown.
hahhaaaa!
Years ago my friend and her huband were test driving a brand new firebird (it was a sweet car.) she said they looked in the glove compartment there was a joint. she told them to throw in a bag and it was a sale. they DID buy the car.
That makes me happy.
I was thinking that I should try to string all the double entendre things I've heard into one quote...
Like...
Well, Mr. Customer, I hear you saying that you want a better price, but this is a very fair offer for a car with this equipment. I mean think of all the extra head room the tilt wheel gives you. Meow, When your wife was here yesterday, she said she was not concerned over color. So I had offered her a larger discount if she would take it in the brown. Maybe if we could get the two of you in here at the same time.... Your wife is a shrewd negotiator. Bring her in in when you're ready to agree to buy, and we will dicker. My manager might be willing to go into the hole for her.
Movie Title: Carry On Up The Back End
/Brit-centric post
Must bad karma for cars this time of year. My truck that is new to me for 31 days has a tranny problem maybe covered under it's 4000 mile "B" warranty but who noes :neutral: My plates are still paper.....:mad:
Wall warts are caused by a virus. Well, either that, or picking up frogs. But this strange growth appears in the wall. You can zap it with liquid nitrogen if you have any laying about.
Edit. Or is that lying about?
That's lying about wall warts!
:p:
Must [be] bad karma for cars this time of year.
I feel ya. Not nearly as bad as tranny prollums, but, GrandCherokeeOne is in dire of a water pump.
A teacher at the high school died. I never met her but she taught Hebe Spanish in 9th grade. She was 39. And so full of life from everything I'm hearing/reading. Hebe said she was always asking her questions about swimming as her daughter was a swimmer. Don't really know why but this has beencreeping into my thought all day (we learned about it last night)Looks like it was fucking cancer :(
Fucking fuck cancer. I'm sorry monster. Ain't got no rhyme or reason. :(
And a resounding, heartfelt
[COLOR="Blue"]FUCK CANCER!!! [/COLOR]
RIP, old friend.
An unfortunate slip of the hand brought an end to a long and utilitarian relationship, one not found in many homes in this country. Perhaps the locus was too near the verge, perhaps it was the unyielding granolithic termination, but despite emergency nerve and muscle responses, this archetypical memorial to Jamie Kennedy was instantly transmogrified by an inexorable fundamental force into shards of amorphous silicate.
Noooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!
Lamplighter! I'm so sorry! But it sure is nice to hear from you, and in such an eloquent way! Though, google as I might, I don't get the Jamie Kennedy reference (though I did read in wiki he's the son of Maury Povich and Connie Chung and I was like 'whaaaaaat?' IMdB says nothing about that.)
eta: he had a stand-up special called 'unwashed'? Was that the reference? I guess I really only knew him from the Scream trilogy.
Sorry monster, sorry for your kids too. .
Lamplighter, as much as I've missed you, it's sad to see you back under these circumstances. I mourn with you. Sometimes our dearest and stoutest friends, seemingly immune to everything, they could always take the heat and still deliver the blackest news. Coming from them, it was somehow better, we welcomed them. We would let them pour out their insides to us, and it warmed us to do so, despite their appearance. So stable, so strong, seeing them fall to pieces from an unexpected shock leaves us feeling broken.
But please don't despair, some morning Joe will come again, and you'll cup him in your hands, bring your face near, and feel that welcome warmth once again.
For quite some time they've been putting cremated people's ashes under tremendous pressure and creating man made diamonds out of it. Some local pottery maker should be able to powder what's left of the old cup and incorporate it into a new handmade one even if only as an added design feature.
Not today, but last night...
Wanna know how to really spice up a Cub Scout campout with 30+ families? Two separate rattlesnake sightings.
Not today, but last night...
Wanna know how to really spice up a Cub Scout campout with 30+ families? Two separate rattlesnake sightings.
I was gonna say naked square dancing, but, youknowrattlesnakeswhatever.
Not today, but last night...
Wanna know how to really spice up a Cub Scout campout with 30+ families? Two separate rattlesnake sightings.
Those kids will remember that camp out for the rest of their lives. :eek:
My son was camping last month and had gone to bed when he stretched out and felt a snake in his bag. Just a rat snake, but it caused much excitement. Can only imagine a rattlesnake.
Oh, and I took a really really tiny piece of wood to the right eye while helping a friend cut down a tree earlier.
Hours later, I finally got it out. Now my vision is alternately blurry in my right eye as I blink. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr
Oh, and I took a really really tiny piece of wood to the right eye while helping a friend cut down a tree earlier.
Hours later, I finally got it out. Now my vision is alternately blurry in my right eye as I blink. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr
Keep it shut, and try not to look around a whole lot.
If it's still funky tomorrow, go to an eye doc and he'll put some shit that looks like mustard in there.
It'll feel
fabulous. Like gasoline.:o
Seriously, there's some stuff in trees that can wreak havoc with the stuff in your eyes. Some kind of fungus or somesuch. If it don't straighten up and fly right pretty quick, I'd go for the mustard looking stuff.
Thanks - still feeling funky. Dunno if I did something to the eye or the lid, but damn its a PITA right now.
Owww. If you'll forgive the pun - I'd keep an eye on that and go to a doc if it doesn't abate.
Thanks - still feeling funky. Dunno if I did something to the eye or the lid, but damn its a PITA right now.
Don't fuck around with that, Classic, really. I had an episode with a freshly trimmed twig stabbing me in the peeper (
peeper, Sheldon,
peeper;)), I went to the eye doc the next day (this was on a Sunday, $$$), but, still wound up looking like Rooster Cogburn for a couple weeks.
ymmv, of course...
Also: Sucks about the latest round w/the ex, dude.
Feeling much better today, thanks guys. Used the eye as an excuse to get out of work a little early. Leaving at 2:30pm saved me a TON of time driving back from Marlton NJ.
We have termites in our house. Thank fuck the thing is steel frame or I'd really be upset. Mainly just two locations inside and one outside, both only a few months old. $2400 later. :( Why is it that shit just keeps piling on shit here? I would love it if my house got squashed by a meteorite and I could claim insurance. There is so much dodgy shit here it's not funny and I am fed up to the eye teeth with being the one that has to deal with everything.
Be thankful it was termites, every other critter down there wants to kill you. :haha:
Well, it could have been worse. I could walk around with my eyes and ears closed like everyone else here while they eat all the available timber. :/ the good news is, i cant hear them munching anymore, so hopefully they are all dead.
It's a common point of conflict between people, I think.
You see work that has to be done, and the others don't.
From their perspective, you are creating work where none exists, and from your perspective, they are a bunch of lazy good for nothing slugs.
They have the power in this situation, because the unfinished work drives you crazy and you wind up doing it yourself. They don't have to do anything and the situation resolves itself.
If you want change, you need to help them to see that the work is real, so they see the need for it to be done, and then you need to tell them you won't take care of it. That it's their turn. And then you have to do nothing.
It's the classic StacyV and Arsen cleaning standoff. Except you need to communicate effectively so it doesn't get bad. It may or may not work, depending on how stubborn you all are.
Maybe your world view is primarily the house, since you live and work there, so things you think should be done there rate a high priority. Someone with a larger world view, may have different priorities.
The other person responsible brobably thinks he has a larger world view.
Out of rehab. Not by choice.
As low as is possible to be.
If you have my number; call me.
I don't know it and am too chaotic to look.
I'm sorry Sundae! :(
Check in when you can, and tell us what's going on.
!!!!!!!
what the heck?
I *don't* have the number, but I'm very interested to know what's going on with you Sundae, please hang in there.
Popdigr gave away my great-great-great-grandfather's eyeglasses. Yes, the gold-rimmed ones, with the silver case.
Why did he go and do that?
Beats the shit outta me.
Now I'm pissed again. But, they're his to give away, I have no say in the matter.
I would like to have had them after he was gone, though.
Please let us know how you're doing, Sundae.
Grav, my Nana did that. Started giving stuff away to whoever she thought might like it. some people got pretty annoyed at the unequal distribution of goods. haha
My Aunt is doing the same thing, although mostly it's to me and my cousin (her daughter). She thinks she might die, so she keeps saying she's trying to sort everything out and get it cleaned up so we don't have to do it when she's gone.
I think a lot of older people do stuff like that. Seems pretty common. No less annoying if it's something special to you though. Perhaps it's time to mention the things you'd like him not to give away because they're significant to you, even if they have no monetary value.
lesson is, peeps, if an object has special memories/whatever for you, share those memories with other people who might also enjoy/appreciate them. Not dissin' on you grv, just trying to turn it to a positive as best I can. And learning the lesson myself, I hope
The man does not possess sentimentality. What're ya gonna do?
Displayed all my most attractive qualities yesterday.
I was childish, selfish, attention seeking, disrespectful, reckless and an all round shit to someone who deserved and rightfully expected better behaviour from me.
My only consolation was it could have been worse.
I didn't shit on her bed.
((((((((((hugs)))))))))) Sundae.
April 17, 1970 - November 18, 2006
Thanks, John.
I miss you.
We all do.
:blackr:
Head zaps, coming off Effexor. They just won't stop.
And ... my husband resents my father living with us, and can be utterly rude at times, like tonight - suggested cards and then was horrifyingly, unbelievably rude and immature toward my father when the cards didn't go his way. Yet he's been very good to my dad, cooked for him and taken care of him for months while I was still away.
I owe him a great deal, and I know I'm also hard to live with. Just wish, sometimes, that life could be less complicated. I can't seem to keep from reacting catastrophically when things get tense at home. I seem to have no resilience left; just wish I could give up.
Wean slower doc!
Good luck with everything.
Reaction to behavior of others... mind over matter. If you don't mind, it don't matter. Hmm. Canadian female, suggests you might be above average in the sensitivity to bad manners. Might want to dial it down a notch, especially judging yourself. That's not to say they're right, but you have to take care of you.
snip--
but you have to take care of you.
all xoB's suggestions are good, but this part bears repeating.
Got the boy's ashes today.
Stopped crying long enough to put on a no-make-up-make-up face.
Halting my drinking to send this.
Subsequent pauses may be the halt and the lame.
I mean wtf am I going to do with a box of charred cat?
I want my annoying, scratch, noisy, trouble back.
And yes I'm being maudlin. Becos I am drunk.
And if it kills me, it kills me. Dramatic overstatment there - at least as far as tonight goes.
Oh, did I mention I was drunk and nonsensical?
My baby boy in a box which however nicely done could hold bath salts. And the label says Dizzy . That's not his name, that's his name,that's not name.
(((((Hugs)))))
Sent by thought transference
I'm so sorry, Sundae. Please stop drinking no matter how sad you are. As much as he loved you, I'm sure he doesn't want to meet you in Heaven so soon. Maybe one day far, far in the future, but not today.
Ahhh hon. Sorry, I only just saw this. *hugs*
Sundae, I know you must be hurting.
So sorry, Sundae. Please take Lola's advice. We'll all get there, but you still have things to do here. {{{hugs}}}
Keep checking in, Cherry. Sometimes just knowing we're here can help.
Cherry I am sad that you are sad. Can you give him a decent burial? He was a good cat and he loved you as much you love him. I know about the pain of losing a
beloved pet, but I also know that we move on. And sometimes we get a new pet.
As time goes on I tend to not think about Kung Pao Kitty as much, and even with Chloe in my life I fondly think back to all the good times. But I don't think about her as much as I used to. I know that you are hurting now, but time heals all wounds. Take care of yourself. Better things are yet to come.
Got the boy's ashes today.
--snip--
And yes I'm being maudlin. Becos I am drunk.
And if it kills me, it kills me. Dramatic overstatment there - at least as far as tonight goes.
Oh, did I mention I was drunk and nonsensical?
My baby boy in a box which however nicely done could hold bath salts. And the label says Dizzy . That's not his name, that's his name,that's not name.
I'm so sorry, Sundae. Please stop drinking no matter how sad you are. As much as he loved you, I'm sure he doesn't want to meet you in Heaven so soon. Maybe one day far, far in the future, but not today.
^WSS
So sorry, Sundae. Please take Lola's advice. We'll all get there, but you still have things to do here. {{{hugs}}}
I'm still sorry for your loss.
But. Please,
please do not let this event be a reason to drink more. For you, drinking is slowly killing yourself. Please stop killing yourself. Please.
The booze will not increase your well-being. Obsessing over your loss will not increase your well-being. Accepting your loss and not manipulating negative thoughts might increase your well-being. If you ever meditate this is the moment. For myself, unfocused contemplation of nothingness usually is the way through. If you have difficulty, you could youtube a guided meditation for support.
Being threatened by angry truck drivers who have been given months to get necessary medical treatment but have chosen not to. Yet who feel entitled to continue driving even though their medical conditions make them a public menace.
I don't want the threats, because the first person to be shot will be my 20-something receptionist who spends her life being charming to people who verbally abuse her, and is the most vulnerable of us because she sits at the front desk. I take on every asshole who is rude to my staff, and most of them back down. But there's sometimes the guy who is angry if I can't unleash his drug abuse/sleep apnea/inability to safely perform the essential functions of his job on the rest of his co-workers/society. I take each one up on what is inappropriate, I sympathize with his need to work, and I do everything in my power to work with him and keep him in his job.
Sometimes it doesn't work out, and I don't delegate any of the unpleasantness. But it upsets me to think that, when that guy comes back with the intent to kill us all, he'll kill my innocent staff before I even know he's in the place, before I can even confront him.
(Yes, I have used the male pronoun in this post. So far I haven't had a woman threaten to kill me, although I'm sure it could happen.)
If he shows up going postal, try this ... Rx: ṪṪ 124gr Pb IC stat
[COLOR="Silver"](That's 2 x 9mm (NATO standard 124 grain lead) rounds to the head. The 1st drops him. The 2nd keeps him from twitching which can be so annoying.)[/COLOR]
I don't own a handgun, but think I should consider ...
My staff worry about the postal issue regularly. One day it will happen, just like the clinic in eastern PA.
So when I did the whole drinking thing after getting Diz's ashes, I also did the falling over things. Really hard. On things you do NOT want to fall over on. If the spectacular cut and sunburst bruise was anywhere accessible to photography I promise I would treat you. No can do, sadly .
On things you do NOT want to fall over on.
A lego?
A bit like that.
But ouchier.
My staff worry about the postal issue regularly. One day it will happen, just like the clinic in eastern PA.
Is it possible to get a buzz lock with a camera on the front door? Technology like that is super cheap nowadays, just a quick doorbell ring and the receptionist can look at their face and make sure they're not That Guy, then buzz them in.
The 2nd keeps him from twitching which can be so annoying.
Shoot him again, his soul is still dancing.[/BadLieutenant]
I heard a few airports have naked x-ray machines going cheap, just place a mirror on the door and they'll stop still for a moment to and they look good/scary while you can check if they're carrying. [COLOR="LemonChiffon"]Or are well hung.[/COLOR]
Um. Call the police. Terroristic threats need to be confronted with extreme prejudice.
Bad Jim! That's profiling.
j/k I agree, that's what the Popo are fo
Um. Call the police. Terroristic threats need to be confronted with extreme prejudice.
Bad Jim! That's profiling.
j/k I agree, that's what the Popo are fo
But, but, if they deal with him themselves, they can charge him for an office visit (business is business).
What would the billing code for that visit be?
We share a building with an Urgent Care practice so can't buzz-lock the front door. The door into the clinical area is locked, but it's flimsy and would be easy to kick in. I worry about the receptionist(s) because they're the first visible staff, sitting behind non-bulletproof glass.
We've had the police involved before, and had certain individuals banned from hospital property (unless they're personally coming in via ambulance). But threats, unless heard by multiple people, are hard to prove. The Supreme Court is considering a case right now that addresses when an utterance made in anger (protected free speech) becomes a 'true threat'. Is it all in the perception of the one on the receiving end of the communication? Or does the one uttering the communication have the right to declare what it means? It's a stickier legal wicket than one might think, and people who make threats may get a warning, but don't usually get taken off the street.
The staff get nervous when they see certain behaviors because absolutely everyone around here has guns. We have no security in the building (we have tried to get some assigned, but apparently it's too expensive to protect us in our little clinic that sits a few blocks from the hospital. Also, most of the security guys the hospital uses are about 90 anyway ...). So, short of getting a concealed carry permit, I don't know a good solution. Maybe bulletproof glass and reception wall in the new office that we'll move to next year ...
Therapy pet ... Doberman.
or, Shark with frikkin lazerbeam.
Each of us could have a therapy dog ... a Doberman, a Rottweiler, a Mastiff, a German Shepherd, and a specially-trained therapy puma. There you go. Any of them could administer Conscious Sedation.
or, Shark with frikkin lazerbeam.
That wasn't a laser beam, it was half of a sonic screwdriver and you know it.
Ha! Maybe that will do until we get the Doberman and puma.
Well, they didn't fire
Dr Silverman.
Just put the receptionists in for hazardous duty pay and you're good to go.
I lost my therapy puma on 9/11, you insensitive bastards!
RATHER BAD LANGUAGE WARNING
Stupid fucking Diz. Still dead.
And Claudette.
And it hurts like buggery without lube.
What's upsetting me is being at the financial mercy of someone I currently despise.
ach damn Ali - that's horrible.
What's upsetting me is being at the financial mercy of someone I currently despise.
that's why god invented lawyers.
I have one. I also have to think about the long term consequences of getting legal reps involved. I just need to suck it up for a bit longer. It will be over soon.
Very bad evening. I don't know how to move past this.
[strike]Tomorrow is another day.[/strike] Tell us all about it.
Share it with us if you can, Ortho. Even if you can't, know that we've got your back.
Sent by thought transference
I want to know what's wrong, but doubt I will be much help. :( trouble shared is trouble halved though. Xxx
Well, it wasn't today, Actually it was last Thursday. The first of my Aunts/Uncles passed away. She was my mother's only sister and the patriarch of the family at 85. She suffered from dementia for a long time. She lived a long and wonderful life. I know she is in a better place, but still. Took a last minute trip to RI with my sister and my parents for the services and to see many cousins etc., some of whom I haven't seen in decades. It really hit me that all these extended parents are getting very old and will be dying soon. Mortality check as I saw her children suffering the loss of their mother. Just ... sucks. My brother's Mother-in-law is also suffering from cancer (FUCK CANCER) and now has some fungal infection in her lungs. She will not last long.
Hug the ones you love folks. You never know when till its too late.
Hug the ones you love folks.
And tell them.
Sorry about your aunt, Classic.
:blackr:
Thanks Grav. She was a cool cat. She used to sneak us kids treats and stuff. Always a warm hug and a big smile.
Sorry Dude. Dementia is a tough one.
Lately the mm, seven, has been complaining of what sounds like RLS, it runs in my family. Poor thing is too young for that shit.
That sucks. I'm sorry.
My son gets headaches, and I feel the same way about it. It's not fair.
In my experience RLS was a nutritional problem, After I started taking magnesium before bed it has never returned. Not being a Dr, I dunno about a 7 yr old. Here is a link I found
http://www.healthline.com/health/restless-leg-syndrome/treatments#Overview1It would kill me to have to watch my child deal with what I've had to deal with. That would just be a living hell.
In my experience RLS was a nutritional problem, After I started taking magnesium before bed it has never returned. Not being a Dr, I dunno about a 7 yr old. Here is a link I found http://www.healthline.com/health/restless-leg-syndrome/treatments#Overview1
I think it is Mg related too. I had a lot of success with this mineral supplement that I was taking but after a while it stopped working. OR maybe I couldn't find it any more. In any case, I'm taking Gabapentin which also helps me fall asleep. We're going to try the mineral route.
That sucks. I'm sorry.
My son gets headaches, and I feel the same way about it. It's not fair.
Oh god, I know. You can't even do anything with a headache sometimes. Cold cloth? Tylenol?
I'm sorry about that too.
Oh god, I know. You can't even do anything with a headache sometimes. Cold cloth? Tylenol?
Not much. If we notice he's had a lot of screen time, we kick him off the screen. Remind him to stay hydrated. We haven't noticed any patterns to trigger them, but those are both good things to do anyway.
And then when he actually gets one, Advil and go lie down. Sometimes he needs the eye mask we keep in the freezer.
Now that I think about it, he hasn't had one since he's been on break. Maybe it's school stress that causes them.
Time to find a hippie school? The testing regimen, among other things, is talking any fun right out of school. My kids graduated just as our local schools went full on nuts with the standardized testing.
Griff, stop being the giving tree, time for a school that appreciates what a magnificent hippie you bee. :)
The kids at the school I used to work at would just blow them off completely, especially the ones that were intended to gauge the school's performance and the ones that were used to determine a student's ranking.
It is a very anti-intellectual community; completing HS is for chumps and college is for fags.
It's a lose-lose situation all around.
I'm doing more suitable work now helping parents address the behaviors of their children with autism. It's interesting getting fully back into that community. These kids are just so interesting. The hippie school has been suggested to me by various cow-orkers but I'm not a regulatory hurdles kind of guy.
Today and, frankly, every day. It's been two years and I still have not gotten used to my vision with the field cut. I used to cheer myself up by thinking one day I'll realize that I just don't notice it or think about it any more. I wished it would be a shorter term but knew it was more likely to be years. It's never going to happen. :cry:
Shit Monster. What is your FOV now?
It's hard to explain. Whatever I am focusing on, I don't see the pie slice from around 9:30 to 11:30 on a clock face. but my brain fills in a sort of fuzz that's the average color of what I am looking at. Its like looking at a scene containing the Predator. or through glasses with a permanent grease smudge. I feel like Midas in that everything I try to look at turns to fuzz and an inverse Medusa in that I can't look directly at anything and see it because it turns to crap. As I travel through my day it feels disorienting like being on a ship except that I'm not unsteady, just my vision is. And it's such hard work to make sure I'm scanning properly and don't miss things. And it's heartbreaking when I'm relaxing so not paying that attention and realize that I have missed stuff. Like Hector tried to high-five me over my shoulder when he was sat behind me and we were playing a family game and I completely didn't see it. Misreading words and making amusing new versions because I'm speed-reading and I didn't see the first letter and my brain just filled in the blank with something that worked is not as funny anymore
and just in case you were thinking maybe I'm maudlin because I've had a beer or two, it's not yet 6pm and even I don't usually start that early ;) Oh well. I needed to get it into words. maybe that will help in itself. thanks guys.
That must be profoundly annoying, I get pissed off at floaters so I can only imagine what the is like.
It sounds like you have about 90 degrees of visual field.
No. It's not like that. Look at the words below.
Fuck Fu ndered lonely as a cloud
Fuck Fuck ooth what have I done
Fuck Fuck Funny how it worksn't
See Fuckety wouldn't offend me
how this Fuck even if I were the
properest fucker of all. As long as
I focused on the center of the text. No bad words would jump out and draw my attention to focus on them. And if they did, once I refocused, all I would see was "uck" or "iuck"
I have a full field of vision, there is nothing wrong with my eyes. But after the information is in and processed, the bit about that part of the picture is not transmitted to the brain. or if it is, the brain is unable to interpret it.
Sorry monster. It sounds like the lack of hope is the worst part.
well it's certainly not helping ;) I still hope that there will come a day when I am so used to it that it doesn't bother me, but I thought a couple of years would be a reasonable and realistic timeframe. Fortunately, it doesn't happen to enough people [COLOR="LemonChiffon"](who survive for many years afterwards) [/COLOR] for there to be any helpful data on such things. :/
That must be profoundly annoying, I get pissed off at floaters so I can only imagine what the is like.
Last summer I had a blood sugar incident over 1500. We caught it and got control, but added a number of large bat signals (floaters).
I focused on the center of the text. No bad words would jump out and draw my attention to focus on them. And if they did, once I refocused, all I would see was "uck" or "iuck"
Jesus, that's nothing like I imagined from your previous mentions in passing of vision problems. Sounds like there's no way to compensate except go very slow and be extra cautious. I don't think that's your style at all. While you're waiting for a miracle maybe you can work out some eye/brain exercises that might help you compensate more quickly. Not giving up, mind you, just busy work.
I feel bad for you but I won't babble on, because I don't want to blow our cover of sterner stuff. ;)
On the up side, if you ever see me, you won't have to see all of me.
1500 Bruce?!!! Holy crap!
Yeah, that was a shocker, especially since I'd been seeing the doctor and been tested every three months for a few years.
It was easily controlled once discovered, and we still don't know what caused this sudden change in metabolism.
Of course the doctors always wonder if you're not telling them about a week long party with Capt. Jack or Miss Oreo, and I suppose some people do that. But I figure this guy works for me, would I not tell my cook I hate Broccoli? Give him all the information so he can do his best for me.
That way I'm confident I'm ignoring only the best advice. :haha:
Our deadliest enemy is denial, which has nothing to do with Egypt.
Is the eye problem worse now, UT? What's up?
No it went away on its own shortly after that thread. Still, what caused it?
I thought we had settled on Lizardmen?
Did this coincide with the appearance of hair on the palms of your hands?
We're doing better than monster though, that really sucks.
Well, yeah - I don't mean to --
I think in honor of Monster we should amke a new new cellar haggis expression to connote displeasure and it should be "uck iucked up"
Or not.
But that does sound seriously iucked up.
hey it's no competition, it's just sucky right now and I thought I'd burden all y'all instead of IRL people ;) It's good and bad that people can't see my "issue". And floaters really do suck too. I just realized I haven't been bothered by mine recently, so I guess there's a plus side -it's given me something else to worry about ;)
That is horrid to have on a permanent basis, monster - I'm sorry.
I've been up for 48 straight hours. The last bit of work on the thesis turned into a nightmare - a bunch of files went missing - think I may have saved some earlier stuff over the completed stuff. Had to send an incomplete thesis to the printers - as submission is 3pm today at latest. It's shabby - a mess, no contents page, no tables (they all went loco on te template when I put them in and I had to delete them all. A bunch of footnote references I spent fucking hours finding and sorting out vanished - and it doesn't even have a conclusion. I just coudn;t bring it all together on no sleep after working flat out for days.
I was about ready to sob. Four years work - and it looks like I've written it with my teeth. Doesn't even meet the presentation criteria.
So - I emailed my supervisor. Thank god for him. He's emailedme back to say he's spoken to the exam peeps and I can get an extension for a couple of weeks.
I am profoundly grateful. I can get it looking like something worth having,.
But - I have a couple more weeks of this nightmare to go when I thought I was done. So that's kind of a bummer.
One bright spot though - Bruce - you wonderful, wonderful man. I shold have pmed you day before yesterday when the letter arrived - but I just couldn;t afford to come on here. It made me cry - in a good way:)
Em
You'll make it, Dana. First thing is to sleeeeeeep.
Dana, I am hoping you typed that in your sleep.
... it's a grad student's very worst nightmare.
Get your rest and hammer home the final nails. We're all proud of you.
I went looking for a spool of black thread tonight, to repair a hem on a skirt I'd like to wear tomorrow. There was no black thread to be found, because my husband stashed all of my 'fiber arts' boxes and furniture in various remote spots around the basement and house, wherever ... everything impossible to reach or gain access to. Because it was all obviously not worth a thought, and unimportant, so just could be thrown anywhere and everywhere obscure.
Except that I spent several years - well, many years actually - sewing beautiful clothes for the boys and my daughter, embroidering classic Ukrainian shirts for the boys AND my husband, making the cutest outfits for S, my daughter, plus beautiful dresses, plus heirloom things for all the kids. And later, I spun yarn that I knitted into hats and scarves, and I bought a loom and wove beautiful fabrics on it ... but to this day my husband doesn't even connect the things he's seen on the kids with what I made, far less the things I wove and designed. So all of my fiber arts equipment is strewn from hither to yon without any care or respect for any of it, and he has no idea how expensive some of it is/was ... and tonight he's looking at me as though I'm crazy for being, in a very tightly-controlled way, just a little put out that everything has been treated as though it were garbage.
Clearly my task next weekend is to pull ALL of it out from its various trashy stashing places and make myself a fiber arts studio from one of the bedrooms in the house. One of the beds will go into storage, and I will take over one of the bedrooms completely for my fiber equipment and materials.
I just spent an hour oohing and aahing over some clothes my husband bought himself for golf. He takes his golf very seriously. I understand that it's important to validate a man's endeavors, and although I have no interest in golf I respect that my husband enjoys it very much. I may be an Aspie (although I know the latest lit says Aspies don't exist, I think we do), but I can understand someone finding a lot of enjoyment and validation in a pursuit like this, and I wish him the best in it.
I have wished that he would take my hobbies with similar respect, but no. He hasn't a clue. I have an entire closet downstairs full of costumes that I sewed for the kids over the years - medieval prince costumes with breeches, doublet, capuchon, medals, shirts ... Roman togas with all details ... medieval princess gowns with brocaded overdress and hooded capes and all possible accessories ... I sewed Japanese dolls for S's hobbies and art class (showed her how to design the costumes and sew them) ... I can sew anything, anything at all. I have a professional quality sewing machine and serger, table for both, cutting table, and everything I have needed to create embroidery designs for clothing, pillows, hangings, and church vestments ... I have sewn priests' cassocks and vestments ... I have woven fabric with traditional and innovative weave designs. I have cross-stitched traditional Ukrainian designs on shirts and tablecloths, table runners, etc.
I can't write any more, I'm too upset. I did so much work for so many years, but it's just nothing. It's so hard to live with a narcissist.
I know I have to just appreciate what I did for itself, and I do. It only makes me upset when it's treated like trash. But I"ll get things set right next weekend. That'll give me something to look forward to, and to work toward. I'll set up my own fiber arts studio in one of the bedrooms.
And it really upsets me that my husband looks at my glass and sniffs it, and wrinkles his nose if it's vodka. Then goes to work out. As if I'm pathetic and weak. Maybe I am. But I could have taken the easy way out so many times, and I haven't.
Too upset, can't go to sleep.
It really doesn't matter; I'll be up all night with my Femara-induced neuropathy anyway, same old same old for the past 6 months. Nevertheless I have to show up and put in 80 hours/week for 40 hours' pay, while my co-worker puts in 16 hours' work for 20 hours' pay. It's typical corporate bs: her husband is head of Oncology (bitter irony), while mine pissed off the CEO and reaped the expected consequence.
I am tired, so tired. Haven't slept in weeks; every time I turn over or slightly wake, pain sears my forearms and wrists and into my hands, and I wake up. The pain gets me right up out of bed. After I walk around for 15-20 minutes, shaking my wrists and hands, it subsides to a dull, sullen grumble. I roll back into bed and position my arms with wrists extended, arms extended. It's not natural and soon I wake up, in pain again because I relaxed my arms and wrists.
I really really don't want to go to work/face work in the morning. But I can't see any other option; I don't know if I could tolerate the fallout of my husband going back to work because I can't carry on.
...in a very tightly-controlled way...
That's the basis for most of your trouble. You aren't being honest with him or yourself by swallowing your feelings. Maybe if you'd blown up now and then, he'd be paying more attention to your feelings.
Secondly, why the fuck do you need his approval for your fiber arts? Didn't your kids appreciate the clothes? Didn't the girl appreciate the dolls? Didn't the church appreciate the vestments? Didn't everyone but him appreciate your work?
And it really upsets me that my husband looks at my glass and sniffs it, and wrinkles his nose if it's vodka.
I don't know if I could tolerate the fallout of my husband going back to work because I can't carry on.
You're taking all this shit while you support the motherfucker?
Well it's not a surprise I saw this coming when you remarried.. and so did you. :rolleyes:
I can't walk a mile in your shoes. I'd get one mostly on, and stumble and break my ankle trying to get the other on. A mile?! No fucking way.
However.
I do have my own thoughts and opinions, which I have mostly (almost completely) kept to myself on this topic, but xoB's remarks at the end there... like he's reading my mind.
I'm just gonna think out loud a little here... I like you ortho, I do. I admire many things about you (not an exhaustive list), your humor, your openness, your clear communications, your bravery and your fucking guts to get through aaaaallll the shit you've gotten through. I hated hearing about your terrible home situation, then biiig changes, HOORAY!. Then *more* changes, and for your own reasons, the sum total of all your reasons for and against, you remarried him.
It's just plain right for me to accept (As. If. there were any other reaction. pffft) your choice, but... Now it seems one or more of the negative factors is pressing on you. Maybe the sum total indicates still to stick with what you've got, but the things you see and hear and feel the most are the negative ones. It sucks for me to watch you suffer (wah me). I truly wish you were reporting different experiences.
I remember well my own anguish from my home life, and it's just that, a memory. *NONE* of the shit that was poisoning my life before is a significant presence in my life now. Mostly because I have different people, and at different distances than before, but also because my own boundaries are wwaaaaaay better. There's still room for improvement, but I have made strides. Life is much better as a direct result. And the lives of the people I previously worked so hard to love/protect/serve/teach/feed/provide for are also better, but really, it's because I'm taking better care of my own goddamn self. Some people needed to fuck off. Those that didn't voluntarily do so got help from me.
When I got rid of a lot of the shittiness, surprise, surprise, my life became a lot less stinky. I hope your life becomes less stinky too. I can't tell you what to do... no, wait. I can tell you what to do, but how, that's tactical, you have to figure that out in each situation yourself. But here's your overarching strategy, morning to nighttime, Take care of yourself. Put yourself first. You can't help anyone else if you're not able to function well yourself. Duh, these aren't absolute, fundamentalist ideas, not subject to reality. Don't be dumb about them. But orthodoc, let your own name move to the top of your list of people you like, people you love, people you want to protect and care for.
All those others will benefit as well, including those that truly need help fucking off. Trust me, the ones that need it the most know it the least. Be a pal, do them a favor, tell them.
What they said. I too ... been there done that.
Good thoughts, good advice, and I appreciate them. I did see the potential for this, although I hoped there had been enough drastic change to create a different dynamic in future. That said, I sometimes allow myself to vent (believe me, I am not always tightly-controlled) at my husband when I'm really projecting frustration from dealing with a middle-school dynamic among a dysfunctional staff at work, or I'm exhausted because I have neuropathy that doesn't let me sleep, etc. Not fair to him or to you here, who only hear my side of things.
I do think that stepping back and keeping my own priorities, values, and boundaries in place is going to be my best strategy, as you say, V. In the morning light, watching the winter sunshine create snow sparkles in the back garden and seeing the birds arrive, squabble, and fill themselves at the feeders, I feel so much at home in this place - it's my refuge. I feel I can navigate this situation. Solving things late at night with vodka is not a good strategy. I'll stay away from that.
I really appreciate your patience. Friends, you guys are.
I'm glad to hear you don't always default to Canadian mode when he pisses you off, you know it's unhealthy to bottle it up all the time. Yell and scream occasionally, and pick out some cheap sacrificial dishes, for punctuating your bullet points, in advance, so you won't break something good by mistake.
No shit, it'll shake up the routine a little, get him wondering if he's pushed too far. Oh, and you could apply for a concealed carry permit, you don't need to own a gun to apply for the permit. Get extra application forms, you know, I case you screw one up. If you don't need them you can jut leave them laying around.
I have more. ;)
Stuck in St Louis. :( three cancellations and reschedules. should have been home hours ago. in hotel at airport but hard to enjoy when I'm tired and stressed and just want to be home. hoping the 8am flight will actually happen
The fuckers at least paid for the hotel, right?
Air travelers faced a new round of headaches Sunday from a major winter storm, the second to disrupt air travel in a week. More than 4,560 flights had been canceled through Monday.
company will reimburse for hotel. An hour til boarding, still, but I'm at the gate and my bag is off on a trip somewhere...... ;)
Good news! :celebrat::juggle:
And people think being an executive is easy.
welcome home, glad you're safe
Three British girls gone to join ISIS.
Stupid bitches.
Sorry, I always said that if you scratched the surface of this liberal there is a reactionary core.
I hate ISIS like I hated the IRA. I don't give a damn what religion you are dressing it up in, if you love killing, you need killing.
These girls are leaving their Western lives, with their good Imams, their decent Dads, their family lives, and going to a place where the Prophet's words are ignored. ISIS don't educate girls. They use them to breed killers. That's not the Islamic faith.
Stay there. Eat the pie you made. Serves you bloody right if your support enables one decent person to be killed. And by decent I don't mean Christian. I mean any creed or colour or faith.
I've been forgiven a lot. Forgiveness I probably didn't deserve. And I was older than 15.
But I never, ever set out to kill anyone other than myself, or support anyone who did.
Silly murderous children.
Sigh.
Now now, they're just rebellious. Children have always been rebellious, remember sneaking outside for a smoke at school dances?
We must have patience, and assure them they are loved, while they "find themselves".
Hopefully, they'll "find themselves" scattered over an acre of desert. :angel:
Stay there. Eat the pie you made.
[SIZE="4"]
Wait.[/SIZE]
They have pie?
This isn't upsetting me now, but it did earlier.
I ran into a nutter earlier today. I mean he really was raving and it was just my luck to encounter him in an empty street before 08.30 in the morning, so I got both barrels. And when I say I ran into him, I wish I had.
Instead I put my "I can't hear you face on" while I walked past and he shouted abuse at me, my figure, my clothes and my actions (me walking into my f*cking door seemed to be particularly offensive to him).
Now I'm not really bringing gender politics into it, because the man was more than a few napkins short of a Happy Meal, but I hated the fact that he brought my mammaries into his harangue - bearing in mind it's a Sunday morning in February, it's cold and they are well hidden under woollens. And the fact I felt so vulnerable in daylight right outside where I live. In many ways it would have been worse if I'd been a man, because then my ego and sense of self-respect may have come into it and I'd have felt emotionally required to challenge him rather than just move-along-nothing-to-see-here. And that wouldn't have been right or decent or satisfying either. It would have been worse yet if I'd been with a man, because he would then have gone through it all on my behalf. The shouter was certainly not capable of making judgements regarding his own risk - he was shouting in an empty street before I wandered along - possibly at a bus.
Having been through a mental health ward, to various NA and AA meetings and currently going through a programme which brings me into intimate contact with ex-addicts of all flavours, some of whom have less than sterling previous life choices (myself included) it seems so unfair to find it by chance too.
Meh. I honestly am over it.
I suppose the day I don't think its worth commenting on is the day I've given in to the madness myself.
Well, that's a helluva way to start the day...
...I started my day by checking to make sure Slick had food in his bowl.
:sniff:
Aww Grav. It's horrible when it catches you unawares.
I am not even a grown-up. I can't make ends meet on part-time hours and I'm back to being sick to my stomach worrying about paying bills. I just applied for another part-time job at a local video store. I cancelled my cable and internet, effective tomorrow. I can't reduce my phone package until I pay my past due amount. I can reduce my car insurance, by increasing deductibles, knowing as soon as i submit the request someone will run into me. I'm tired of it. I'm tired of being alone and trying to do this all by myself when what human being can? Yet I don't see anything changing anytime soon. I do love my new job, but I'm falling back into deep depression because I can't pay my bills and it doesn't seem like things should be so hard.
:( so sorry. I'm in a funk today as well. I'm meeting with a special needs advocate/adviser tomorrow regarding finances for my son now and after I'm gone etc etc.
She gave me a list of all the documents she needs to get started. I don't even have 1/4 of the stuff on the list. No stocks, bonds, investment portfolio etc etc etc. I suck. :(
:( so sorry. I'm in a funk today as well.
I'm meeting with a special needs advocate/adviser tomorrow
regarding finances for my son now and after I'm gone etc etc.
She gave me a list of all the documents she needs to get started.
I don't even have 1/4 of the stuff on the list.
No stocks, bonds, investment portfolio etc etc etc. I suck. :(
Stocks, bonds, etc. are part of the process, but... and it's a big "but",
this is an even more important time for you to put in writing what you want
and believe is reasonable for your son when you are no longer around to give guidance.
Attorneys and CPA's are all too often involved with the fiscal and legal side of things.
But the role of the special needs advocate is also to include the
support and guidance that parents are no longer able to provide.
Guardianship, level of independence, religion, parenthood, on and on...
Pls, take this aspect of the process to heart and give it the attention it needs.
This will also get you past some silly notion that you "suck".
.
Yeah no suck at all. The people who do this have to make sure they haven't overlooked something, that would be unprofessional and uncool. the way to avoid that is to make a checklist of everything anyone could possibly have. "Possibly" makes it a very long list, but about the only thing not on the list is that bottle of hundred year old scotch tucked away. But then, we'll probably drink that at your funeral. :p: Seriously man, you don't suck because you don't have all those things, nobody has all those things.
Also, you wouldn't want to hang with people who used that list as the measure of a man. :headshake
I do love my new job, but I'm falling back into deep depression because I can't pay my bills and it doesn't seem like things should be so hard.
Sorry to hear this.:(
I hope you get the other job you applied for. And Spring will be here in just a couple weeks.
Woke up 4 hours ago with one hell of a piercing pain in my lower back, and it's still not going away, webMD said to rest for 48 hours but it gets worst when I lay Down.
If this is my body's way of telling me "Welcome to your 30s", it has one sick sense of humor.
Go see a chiropractor. They will pop that nonsense right back where it belongs.
The Walking Dead season four.
That nice man out of Teachers has just killed some piglets.
In other news, I stepped on my glasses today.
Thankfully I had enough funds to replace them. Unthankfully I won't get said replacement until 7 March.
You don't get to demand things when you live on handouts.
Classic, you do not suck. Just keep on being a good dad to your kids.
:thumb::thumb:
Also:
Sorry about your back,Traceur, but...
Howdy, and welcome back!
I really need to lose weight. Today I ripped the seam of the arm of my shirt while wearing it. And I wasn't even doing the Hulk pose. :thepain:
Looks like you been eating your spinach.
Upset is probably the wrong word - but certainly makes me feel very sad:
J's sister has just been diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer - best case 2 years, likely much less.
J has many half siblings - but Em is his one full sibling. They were very close as children - then things got very rocky (all to with his Mum and the abusive home they grew up in) and they didn't speak for about a decade - a few years ago they got back in touch with each other, and though they didn't recover the closeness, and they've been up and down since, it is clear that they love each other very much at some level.
J was supposed to be coming over during the Easter break, but he's just heard the news and Jan says he has barely left his den since then. They're going over to Manchester on Monday to see her.
I always had a soft spot for Em - even when they weren't in contact and even when she was a real bitch for a bit - I always liked her. In recent years we haven't spoken much, but the odd facebook message now and then - and a few years ago we all got together for J's graduation and then for J's Dad's 60th.
I'm sad for Em, and for her kids who are too young to be losing their mum. Mostly though my heart is breaking for J - alongside the grief of it all the whole sorry slew of missed years, misunderstandings and shared familial damage will be swirling around in his present in a way that won't be easy to deal with.
And my heart breaks for J's dad too. The idea of him losing his eldest daughter appalls me.
Fuck cancer.
Damn. Sorry D. Was it smoking related?
Fuckin cancer. That sucks, sorry Dana.
ugghh. Thats terribly sad. Fuck Cancer.
Just found out another classmate of mine was "re-diagnosed" - now its in her lymph nodes. 6 months or so ...
They just keep coming. Sorry man.
The lying two-faced front-end manager at my job. Stupid cunt is too dumb to realize there is a paper trail to prove her wrong, but really.....why should I have to deal with it and take time out of doing my job to show she fucked up at hers. To the person she last laid the blame on behind their back. sigh. Why can't people just be honest and do their job?
They're people.
People suck.
The lying two-faced front-end manager at my job. Stupid cunt is too dumb to realize there is a paper trail to prove her wrong, but really.....why should I have to deal with it and take time out of doing my job to show she fucked up at hers. To the person she last laid the blame on behind their back. sigh. Why can't people just be honest and do their job?
Welcome to the "working" world. This is an almost everyday occurrence for me. Mostly, its my immediate boss. Puts me in a very crappy situation. Sadly the managing partner doesn't want to hear it. He's got his "Yes-man" and will hear none of it. grrrrrrrrrrr.
Didn't need to get the proof out. Fortunately she is not the boss of me -I'd be long gone voluntarily if that were the case. The boss of me is a very savvy gentleman who has her number and tore her a new one over this without me having to say a thing. And now I know for sure who is "not my friend". :lol: With the added bonus of her being so dumb she thinks she's fooling everyone. ah well. I am no longer upset.
It would just be a nicer place if people could tell the truth. Yesterday she came to me with a photo she had taken of an old sale price sign that should have been taken down (which adds to the problem we are dealing with) She wanted my backing in blaming that department and agreeing is wasn't her fault. When I said, "actually, you can blame me for that one, I must've missed it when I got the others" she was all "oooh no, I'm not going to blame you, I won't report it, then". I told her to go ahead, the department and I share that task and I'll accept responsibility -the situation is unchanged, a sign was missed that caused a problem.... but she wasn't having any of it. I guess she thinks she's "done me favor" now :rolleyes:
And now I know for sure who is "not my friend".
And knowing is half the battle.:thumb:
It's a shame, though. We have no need to be in competition. Oh well, her loss
Sorry I deleted that last post. I've tried posting about it numerous times and I was set off today but it's really still so upsetting to me that re-reading my own words made me even more upset.
Ugh. Sorry. :(
Sorry Infi! I hope you get past this.
I guess she thinks she's "done me favor" now :rolleyes:
Do Brits leave out the definite article there, or did you just do that?
I've heard the phrase "I'll do you
a treat." I'm confused.
Fargon, she's not British any more. Didn't you see the pic of her and Beest getting their Americanisation passes?
Sent by thought transference
I know that she is not British anymore. I think that your were addressing footfootfoot.
You're right Fargon. Please accept my apologies. X
Sent by thought transference
I r 2 still british:) but twas a typing fuckup. cant trype in either language
Do Brits leave out the definite article there, or did you just do that?
I've heard the phrase "I'll do you a treat." I'm confused.
I'm also confused ... I thought 'a' was indefinite and 'the' was definite ... as for the treat, I'm all for that.
Your definitely right there, Ortho!
Sent by thought transference
indefinite. Yes. I leave in out sometimes and add in when I oughtn't.
On to other, more doleful tales:
The mm wanted to bring the six new chicks who are pretty much feathered out to their new outdoor quarters since it was such a mild day. The establish hens were not thrilled with the young turks (see what I did there?) and would menace them.
We made a little shelter for the pullets apart from the hens that would exclude the hens.
Six went in but only five came out this morning. No sign of forced entry, no blood, nothing. Eerily, my son had asked me earlier what the TV show X-Files was...
So we brought the pullets back inside until they are a little bigger.
Bonus round:
Mr. and Mrs. Bigger had a baby. Who was the biggest?
[COLOR="Wheat"]The baby because he was a little Bigger.[/COLOR]
Mr. and Mrs. Bigger had a baby. Who was the biggest?
[COLOR="Wheat"]The baby because he was a little Bigger.[/COLOR]
Thank you. I'll have to use this one.
I like something that will do me a treat.
I don't like people who do me up like a kipper.
Something occurred 2 weeks ago and it is still weighing heavily on me.
We were up in Pennsylvania visiting my oldest child, my son who left the US Navy after a period of PTSD. Up until a few months ago he had been sort of a caretaker for his mother (my ex) who has failed at handling her own affairs in the years after our divorce. My son had given her a place to stay, handled what little money she had and put up with her BS. It was very stressful for him and his wife, but especially for him with the depression he had from the Navy. Anyway at Christmas while his mother was visiting our daughter near Seattle he made the decision that she could no longer live there as it was making life miserable. So, we visited and in general he and his wife are so much better, less stress and depression. But during our visit my son asked me if he could ask me a very personal question. "Sure" I said knowing questions from my kids like this usually mean a followup question about my marriage or divorce.
He asked if I had ever cheated on his mother and given her an STD. I was shell shocked, for a moment I thought he said LSD! I told him no, I had not and had never even kissed another woman during the 14 years of our marriage before we split up. Then he told me she had told him and his wife I had cheated and given her an STD and it wasn't with a woman but a gay man I used to work with occasionally. Well my wife and I were pretty shocked and when I got home I called my son in Alaska who is currently the caretaker for the mother. I asked him if she had ever told him this story and he said yes recently she told him and his wife. He told me he didn't believe it and just chalked it up to her attitude to life and how she still blames everyone else for all that has gone wrong in her life.
So that night I sent an email to both of my daughters asking about this. My youngest daughter told me her mother told her this lie a year ago when she had stayed with her and her newborn baby. I did not hear from my older daughter so I called her this past Sunday and we talked. She admitted that she had been told this but it was a few years ago when she was finishing college and there was no mention of an STD or a gay encounter. So, Sunday afternoon I sat my youngest son down who lives with us and asked him. He said he had not heard this. Not sure if I fully believe him as he is very close to his mother and is planning on being the next caretaker for her later this year if he can get enough money to get a 2 bedroom apartment.
So I am really pissed and hurt. This bitch who dragged me through a divorce in 1996 and then took my kids away from Houston to live in California and did everything she could to make visitation hard has now raised up and told a major lie about me. But what bothers me almost as much is that while the kids that admitted they were told this fault their mother to some extent, they just chalk it up to mom being mom.
My oldest daughter's wedding is planned for September this year and she and her sister both told me that while they understand how hurt and mad I am they hope I will be civil while at the wedding. I have been nothing but civil over the years and have attended other events with my ex, a wedding, various holiday gatherings, etc. I guess it bothers me that they want me to confirm I will be a nice guy yet no mention is made of their mother being nice.
I am thinking about not attending. My daughter is 31 and she and her fiancee are handling all of this. We even mutually agreed some time back that I won't walk her down the aisle as she is an adult.
Still undecided and I have time to let it settle down but I am royally pissed off.
God, Chris, that's awful.
But - I'd hesitate before allowing her bullshit to stand in the way of your presence at your girl's wedding.
Yes, I have time to let the bad feelings settle down. Just not sure if I will say anything more about it. My daughter who is getting married seems more angry with her older brother for stirring all this up and asking the question. I'm just glad he had the balls to ask me, I could have gone to my grave with the kids wondering if this was true or not. She should really be more upset with her mother but that seems to be another story.
well, that's a seriously shitty thing for her to say and do. I'm sorry you've been tarred like this chris. It doesn't sound like any of your kids give any credence to her lies, though they still do cause harm. Of course you can't change anything about her, nor what she says to other people. I think it's smart to protect yourself with whatever space is necessary to keep from getting splashed with her shit, but I find it very sad that you might not attend the wedding of your daughter as a result of your ex wife's bullshit.
As for saying anything more about it? What could you say that you haven't already said? Not counting talking to her about it, because, what a waste of breath that would be. I've been in a similar situation for years where my ex has had the ears of our kids--god only knows what poison has been dripped into their ears--but they've grown to be able to tell the shit from the shinola.
I'm reminded of the aphorism posted outside the church at the start of RHPS:
Be Just and Fear Not.
They'll get it right, even if the ex doesn't.
After everything is over and done with, right before you leave, tell her you're sorry that she was hurt enough to make up lies to this effect. Do this profusely, if you can stand it. Make her feel like shit. And if that don't work, tell her it wasn't a gay man, it was her bff, her sister, or her brother. Or her brother and sister.
:D
I feel for ya, Chris. I probably wouldn't bring it up. I'd just look at her, smile, and chuckle. Out loud.
Or ...be cordial, and lean in to give her a hallo hug and whisper "you've lied to everybody and made up a story about me sleeping with a man and giving you an std - how sad is that?"
Then break straight away, still smiling and speak to someone else, like all you said was a friendly greeting and a comment about your daughter's wedding.
I'm with Dana and Grav.
It sucks when kids give their crappy-other-parent a pass, but it helps to remember that when you add up all the years, they have had to put up with more of her crap than you have, and they will have to continue dealing with her crap even after this particular tempest. They may know all too well that making a big deal about this will only make their lives harder in the long run.
If this is the kind of person she is, then she would not feel bad even if confronted anyway. She would either double down and accuse you of lying, or find a way to make up a better lie next time so she will be believed. Better to treat her like the child she is. A smirk is always more powerful than a yell. Oh, and make sure you dance very happily with your beautiful wife all night long. :)
It could have been much worse, really.
She could have said that he beat her with a stick, or something...worse.
Yeah. That's true Grav. Also - it's such an outlandish accusation to make - that it's unlikely to be believd by anyone.
No, it's perfect. If she claimed he beat her with a stick, where's the wounds, where's the damage, where's the corroborating evidence? She was smart enough to choose something that most people wouldn't pursue out of embarrassment and sympathy for the victim. STD covers a lot of ground and there are many that don't show outward symptoms.
She may be evil, but not stupid.
She may be evil, but not stupid.
Stupid people don't go crazy.
Or ...be cordial, and lean in to give her a hallo hug and whisper "you've lied to everybody and made up a story about me sleeping with a man and giving you an std - how sad is that?"
Then break straight away, still smiling and speak to someone else, like all you said was a friendly greeting and a comment about your daughter's wedding.
I like this a lot. The kids know the truth though, so don't give her any power.
... the 14 years of our marriage before we split up ...
Thank you for keeping her away from the rest of us for all that time. You're a good man Charlie Brown.
Oh, and just tell people you're her ex-beard.
She was smart enough to choose something that most people wouldn't pursue out of embarrassment and sympathy for the victim. STD covers a lot of ground and there are many that don't show outward symptoms.
She may be evil, but not stupid.
*clink clink clink*
"Ladies and gentlemen, can I have your... ladies and gentlemen... there's something I need to say on behalf of... that woman over there.
I know she's let on to... a few of you, that we've shared a secret all these years, and there's something I need to get clear with everyone in this room.
It's all true.
I'm just sorry that it was something so serious, so dangerous, and, obviously, you know, incurable.
I know that you'll feel less of me; I just hope you won't feel less of her. It's something she's had to deal with for a long time, and unless there's some sort of breakthrough, something she'll have to deal with for the rest of her life. Shortened though it probably will be.
But at least she has the luxury of someone to blame. I can only blame myself, and that... dark alley... that late night... and the booze. The booze had its good times - without it we couldn't have produced these marvelous children. But when you're blackout shitfaced in a big city, sometimes life becomes unpredictable.
Anyway! It's my one big regret in a lifetime of supporting all you people and being the most gracious human being and family member I can be, and now that I've confessed, I'm out --" *drops the mic and walks away*
Because it's on my mind I may as well share.
My Auntie by marriage (Dad's brother's widow) broke her hip over Easter. She knew she was in a bad way, but hid it from her sons and her care workers.
When my cousin found out he immediately had her taken to hospital, X-rayed etc.
She was discharged temporarily to a care home, where she had more falls (HOW?! but that's another topic) and readmitted to hospital.
She will now be discharged home. Social Services can offer four visits a day, none at night. She is a severe risk in terms of falls, she is incontinent. But she's a bloody tough old East Londoner. Because her psych eval shows she is compos mentis, the hospital is legally bound to respect her choice and she refuses to go to a care home. She says they'll have to take her out of her flat on a board. But what kind of a life is that? Lying in a soiled bed until the first carer arrives, waiting for someone to come and feed you? How can that be worse than being looked after 24 hours?
This hurts me because although she's not actually blood, she's definitely family. She put up with Ted and his temper and alcoholism for years, lived through the Blitz, brought up two boys only to have one shattered into pieces by a motorcycle accident (Tony has artificial legs and metal plates in his skull) and loved and looked after my Mum when she was a young bride and new mother.
She's an amazing woman, in an unamazing way if you get what I mean.
She didn't change the world, but she worked hard, played hard, saved money, raised kids, looked after her neighbours and kept a home.
And now she refuses to be looked after.
I don't get it.
I wasn't cast from her mould.
If someone offered to look after me for the rest of my life I'd bite their hand off. After they signed the papers of course.
It's not even as if she owns the flat - it's rented from a charitable trust, so she's not spending any "inheritance" she wants to pass on to her sons. Her sons who want her to be happy, but also really want her to be safe.
Oh yeah, and she's a cancer survivor.
Of course.
Sigh.
I can't say they don't make them like that any more, but I will always hold in my heart the night Mum, Auntie Joyce and I hit the vodka and stayed up well after the husbands went to bed. I don't treasure the drinking, but I do remember the stories. And I had my first Bloody Mary the next day (and I hated tomato juice). "Get that down you gel, hair of the dog!" I didn't dare refuse.
She sounds like she has always been tough, and is continuing to be that way now. Lately I have seen 4 elderly people at that same stage in life, and every single one of them behaved the same way. "Don't take me to the hospital or a nursing home. Let me stay here in my own home." Sometimes they get that wish, but usually not.
Meh.
Just take 'em for "a ride in the country". Y'know, to "live on a farm"...
Good on her. I feel her pain, I would hate to be "looked after" 24/7. Or at all, in fact.
Look at this this way, the soiled sheets are unlikely to cause her much discomfort and her sense of smell probably isn't all that great. She can stay awake reading all night if she wants with no-one nagging her. All her things are around her, the sounds are familiar, and no-one is being wheeled off on a gurney with a toe tag in the middle of the night.
She's in her dominion and can ask anyone who treats her unkindly to leave. She can make her own decisions, whether they're sensible or not. I can't understand someone happily relinquishing any control to anyone else, One night in hospital is absolute torture for me to the point where they agree it's better for me to be released, even if I just had a C-section the night before or a stroke. maybe she's the same way. Horses for courses, I guess.
Try to be happy that she's still her old self and has the balls to make decisions that are right for her rather than cowtowing to the wishes of her family members who want to make life easier/less worrisome for themselves. I know that sounds harsh, but think about it -she's clearly smart enough to know what risks she's taking. People want her in a home so THEY won't be worried -which is nice but in the end that's a thing about them not her
To be fair to them, they don't want her having to live with bedsores, lesions, black eyes and broken bones.
But I appreciate the flip side better now. I'll try that approach with Mum next time she is worrying herself about Joyce. Because it does make sense to celebrate the way she has decided to live.
Thor's last few schooldays in middle school are all going to hell in a handbasket. he suddenly stopped turning in work and the grades for his two high school credit classes have plummeted but no-one alerted us and we only just found out, he got confused between the after-party for graduation (which he wants to go to) and the Cedar Point trip (which he doesn't) and we can't find the appropriate permission slips and it's in two days.
in no way is he ready or prepared for high school. it's all going to be a fucking disaster.
plus we have hebe's high school gra dparty on Friday, weather forecast is shite and house is a dump and I'm running on fuck all sleep
Sounds like a stressful week ahead Monster, but hopefully in a run-around-like-crazy last-moment-manageable kind of way,and not the actual disaster way...
As far as highschool...
Was anyone prepared for high school?
In any point in the history of schooling?
I am pretty sure the reality of the next stage in life falling on you like a brick at the end of any previous stage of life is how we've collectively decided as a civilization to haze our children. Couldn't we do pranks instead? Something a bit more lighthearted...
Yes my older two were prepared and more than ready. Nothing prepared us for Thor. Oh well....
My friend who had brain cancer died this morning. I am very sad. He was the first boy I ever kissed, and my first major crush. Gone too soon from a family already struck by tragedy. His sister died only a couple of months ago.
Life is so harsh sometimes.
So sorry Ali. Fuck cancer.
Sent by thought transference
Yeah. Fuck cancer. I am surprised at how much grief I feel. I guess sometimes it just gets you when you least expect it.
Yeah. Fuck cancer. I am surprised at how much grief I feel. I guess sometimes it just gets you when you least expect it.
I hear you. Sorry Ali.
I'm sorry Ali. There's not much to say other than it sucks and is unfair.
I think sometimes we grieve more for the people who haven't been a steady fixture in our lives, because we grieve for the missed opportunities.
Gonna go hug some folks today.
He was the first boy I ever kissed, and my first major crush.
I am surprised at how much grief I feel.
I've been there (no, I didn't lose the first boy I ever kissed, it was my first
girl, ya nimrods), done that.
No surprises here on how much grief you're feeling. It's another of those things you just don't know about til you live it.
I think sometimes we grieve more for the people who haven't been a steady fixture in our lives, because we grieve for the missed opportunities.
That.
Oh, Ali, hon, that's terrible. So sorry.
I am sorry for your loss :(
Funeral is this Friday. It will be huge. I think I will go for the service, but skip the burial and the wake. I have a lot of work to do this week, and honestly, if I go to the wake I will get smashed and fuck everything up, so I will go to the service, and then come back and honour him by working hard, just as he did all his life.
That is what grown ups call "a plan".
Good on ya..
I just heard J's sister died on Saturday. Last i heard they'd been talking in terms of a few months - six tops - then she went into a sudden decline.
I feel so sad for her family - and the thought of what J and his Dad are both going through right now breaks my heart.
So sorry for J and family. I know it hurts you too.
...the fact that I'm not eligible to retire is upsetting. :(
I bit the ever loving hell out of the bottom of my tongue. It looks physically impossible, but it's there. That was Saturday. It still hurts when ever I eat or swallow. it scrapes right along my molar. It didn't bleed, but it is a massive bruise. I'll see if I can get the kids to take a photo.
Someone's friend's sister died
Someone can't get to the next stage of their life
Someone got a bleeding mouth thingy...
Just to continue the improvement scale: My toast got burned.
(The next person's trouble better not be greater then a broken nail!)
Our central AC went out yesterday! It seems like every other year or so this happens. Usually it's a capacitor or a relay that burns out in the condenser unit outside. We replaced our entire system about 10 years ago with a top of the line Trane system and otherwise it heats and cools great. It's just frustrating because it takes a day for the service call and it always seems to cost $300 or so for parts and labor and it means the house gets pretty hot for a while.
In this part of the country our AC units run just about year round with less use in the cooler months but they still cut on from time to time then. In the summer you figure it probably stops and starts several times per hour, 24 hours a day so those parts get a lot of work.
There isn't much to an AC unit. If you have even a little electrical knowledge, replacing a capacitor or relay yourself is a half hour job, and the parts are about $30.
$300 is a fair price though for a tech to come out to your house, have the part in stock in the van, and get the thing up and running again in short order.
You could try to track down the part yourself, but it would probably take a few days. Meanwhile you'll be suffering in the heat.
Typing this post makes me think I should buy a capacitor and relay in advance and just keep them on the shelf so I can do it myself when it happens. We had a relay go out a few years ago because ants built a nest inside it. So that stuff happens. It cost us $300 then, and I looked the part up afterwards and saw it was like $30.
Yes, I've thought about that but it seems to never be the same part 2 times in a row. One year it's the cap., the next it's the connector relay. Last year it was the main circuit board up in the furnace that controls everything. That repair was around $600. I should take a basic course in AC repair.
What is frustrating it that our AC system came with an advertised extended warranty but the installer company didn't tell us we had to mail in a postcard requesting the extended warranty from Trane so we didn't get it. The guys we use now for repairs said they always fill out the card for the customer and send it in as a courtesy and were surprised that the company we purchased the system from did not do that. All this stuff would still be covered except for not sending the postcard. :eyebrow:
So I go home to be here a bit in advance of the AC repairman coming and find my home at a cool and non humid 74 degrees..... Called my son at his job, he spent the night here and he said it seemed to cool down after he went to bed last night. I cancelled the service call as I don't think it would have done any good but I have to wonder why it didn't work yesterday. Not sure if the capacitor that starts the compressor can fail intermittently. I figured they just fail. Yesterday when it wasn't cooling the blower in the furnace was going and also the fan on the condenser outside was but I don't think the compressor was running as the insulated copper pipe was not cold, just the outside temperature.
Well at least the service lady said to call them over the weekend if it goes out and that the service call is the same price, $85 as for a weekday.
A silly upset, but I get upset about silly things.
There's a ferry strike directly affecting the ferries to/ from Arran this weekend.
I don't go til Monday, thank goodness. The poor people heading off for the first holiday of the long vac (today is the last day of school for Scottish children) will have their plans very much affected. I will almost definitely not be affected by Monday, but can't help fretting all the same.
Probably because I always have a bit of a mood "crash" after a visit, and my Godfather came to see me Weds-Thurs, so I may be a little more vulnerable than usual.
Still, they have all weekend to sort out their industrial issues, and I have all weekend to keep saying calm-calm-calm to myself.
My sister and family (plus Conor) are booked to go to Tunisia in August. They have more to worry about than a ferry strike. Mum says even if things don't escalate, my sister is now terrified that if they go she's putting all her loved ones in danger. I do feel for her. I wouldn't let the threat of terrorism change my plans (or I wouldn't have back when I was completely well) but then I've been a solo traveller for the last 17 years. She has children and grandchildren to consider.
Of course, my sister's worries are nothing compared to those caught up in the carnage, but I don't know them.
the blower in the furnace was going and also the fan on the condenser outside was but I don't think the compressor was running as the insulated copper pipe was not cold, just the outside temperature
That's weird.
After being home about an hour the house started warming up and it is evident the AC has gone off again. I checked the unit outside, the fan is running but it's not producing hot air as when the compressor is doing it's thing. I can hear a short hum from the area where the capacitors and relay contacts are every few minutes like it's trying to kick on the compressor but not succeeding. This is a pretty high end unit with a 2 speed compressor so their are 3 capacitors, one for fan and 2 for the compressor, also 2 relay contact assemblies. My hunch is one of the caps or contact relays is blown. I wouldn't know which one to replace, I don't have a voltage meter that measures microferads which you need to check the capacitors.
Called back to the AC service company but now they are booked until Monday. Called another place that said they might fit it in today or no later then Saturday morning. Guess we will spend another night at my mother in laws on the guest bed.
This sucks.
Pain in the ass. I didn't hear a humming when my relay was on the fritz with the ants. It was more like an ineffectual clicking. You don't have ants crawling all over the unit, do you?
Certain person is now on FB and we have, not surprisingly, 30 something mutual friends. I don't want to know any more about her life than I do so I'm not going to friend her but it irks the shit out of me that she's now there. (And how nauseatingly fawning over her they are.)
I really feel like I need to move out of town or state.
Facebook IS nauseating fawning. New FB users are unaware that they are only reaching 10-20% of their friends with their stuff, and many of them go way overboard at first. You may rest assured that, now, other people are getting tired of her shit.
Block everyone you don't like by selecting the "don't show me posts from this person" feature.
Block everyone you don't like by selecting the "don't show me posts from this person" feature.
Does the other person know you've blocked them?
No they don't
I was gonna say even if you're friends, but I'm not sure about that. I know you can unfollow friends and they don't know about it.
Exactly! FB friends aren't people you want to follow, they are people who you are socially obligated to let them feel like you are part of their lives without actually wanting any real interaction with them.
So you guys have the same attitude towards FB as me.... I'd say let's be friends but...
Heh.
I hate facebook. Every so often I have a flurry of activity reconnecting with friends and relatives - but I hate everything about fb. I hate the layout - everything looks too fucking busy. I hate the atmosphere - and as much as I love my cousin Rache - I am soooooooo not interested in every single drawing, painting and clay model her many little ones produce - nor do I want to be privy to her and her fellah's sweet nothings - ffs, keepthat shit to yourself. It's like stepping inside a goddamned Hallmark card.
For me it's 90% crap and 10% interesting and/or important items from friends and family that I care about.
But I do believe that if I worked at it, tended to my feed, with unfollows and whatnot, I could get that interesting number up to 15%.
That sounds about right.
It's also slightly depressing to discover just how racist and reactionary some of my extended family and childhood friends are :P
That one worked out in reverse for me - my super-racist friend from age 13 turned into a super-progressive who manages the only remaining independent bookstore in the area!
(I really want to know how it happened but we have not connected up at that sort of level.)
It's also slightly depressing to discover just how racist and reactionary some of my extended family and childhood friends are :P
I had an email from a family member recently (I don't Facebook) who insists they are not racist and are aggrieved if something I say even mildly suggests their attitude is a little unfair. They blamed the late post, and a couple of torn envelopes arriving over the course of a few weeks... on immigrants.
But of course.
They come over here, mess with our post, who do they think they are etc etc.
I'd say you couldn't make it up, but sadly the newspaper this person reads, does. Frequently.
A friend of mine has decided, after numerous cancer episodes, that she will no longer use western medicine to treat her cancer, and will now employ holistic treatment including veganism.
Update, she is still with us but in pain. Sometimes, she reports, she cannot bend over to get pots and pans on the lower shelves. Some days, she reports, she can't walk from one end of the house to the other without pain.
She doesn't talk about it at all. Everything I know is from the few offered statements she made over dinner and conversation last Sunday. Denial is a big part of her arsenal for dealing with this. I'm not judging. Certainly I have used it from time to time myself.
She went and got some pain management, so she's wound up not entirely anti-doctoring, but she's not going for treatment. I think this says that she was exhausted from all the medicine she has been through, with multiple rounds of cancer and then open heart surgery.
But if that's what it is, it would be better for everyone involved if she would just say so. I feel like there is something emotionally preventing her from admitting she is committing slow suicide. It's not hard to imagine how one might end up in that sort of personal emotional trap.
It is so heartbreaking.
You might point out that's how Steve Jobs killed himself, but being that aggressive is not your nature. :(
But if that's what it is, it would be better for everyone involved if she would just say so.
My Mom told everyone she'd do the pain medication but not the chemo. She was more open about that decision than anything in her life. I guess it was her nursing background.
But if that's what it is, it would be better for everyone involved if she would just say so. I feel like there is something emotionally preventing her from admitting she is committing slow suicide.
Is it possible she feels like she is protecting her loved ones by pretending everything will be fine? That if she says, "Yep, gonna just die in awhile, and I'm at peace with that," all her friends and relatives will hate her for abandoning them? A fair number of people are able to get to the point where they are at peace with their own death, but very few are ever able to agree that death is the right choice for someone they love.
I'm not sure what brings her to this point. At one point she told Facebook that she was cancer-free after a few months of veganism. I don't know if she really believed it, just wanted to believe it in the sense that belief makes things true, or wanted everyone to treat her normally.
... A fair number of people are able to get to the point where they are at peace with their own death ...
I'm getting the impression, from the story as told, that she's not yet one of them and rationality has been slipping away.
I need to get my head screwed on right. This shouldn't be bothering me so much, but it is.
My firm renewed its lease at this building and is going to renovate its space into more of an "open office" concept. I just saw the new floor plan yesterday.
I am losing my private office. It isn't a big office, but I've had one private office or another for about 20 years. I'll be in a marginally larger room, with 4 people in it and a small desk in each corner.
"Managers" get to keep their offices. I'm a manager in what I do, but not in my title. I'll be losing about 85% of my file space and getting a desk about half the size of the one I have now, so I have to dramatically change how I do my job and what records I keep on hand.
When I let my mind wander and go down the path of worry, I think about how one of the things I do is manage contract workers, and at first glance, I don't see any space for contract workers in the new building. Which means they intend for all future contract workers to be offsite. If they are offsite, they won't be managed as closely by me any more. So now I'm wondering if they are going to phase out my job. Or part of it anyway.
The truth is they need me badly for this renovation. I'll be doing lots of managing space and moving staff around. It will be very busy for me. And during that time, I'll get a clearer picture of what is coming, and can try to maneuver myself into an indispensable position. But right now, all I can see is them not valuing me.
Gah. Those fuckers. Part of the problem is that the firm used to be run by really smart people, and the people running it now are fairly clueless. And that bugs me too. I wonder if this place is a sinking ship. I fantasize about dusting off my resume and going elsewhere, but my chances for succeeding are better here in this organization where I have a good reputation with a lot of people I know well. How am I going to get my foot in the door anywhere else, and maybe those other places are run by idiots too.
Anyway, I have all these toxic thoughts going through my head. Things have a way of working out. I just need to clear this shit out of my head.
Hopefully, in your cape & long-johns role, during the renovation, you'll be able to gain access to an influential ear who has the power to jiggle the plans a little. Maybe a penthouse suite with hot and cold running secretaries. ;)
I have a feeling you're in an all too common situation, where smart people put a business together, then get replaced by business school, cookie cutter, professional managers, often at the insistence of wall street.
I always believe in hedging bets. There's nothing that says you can't throw yourself wholeheartedly into the renovation, while also dusting off your resume and casually browsing the corporate job listings. You have the luxury of lounging around waiting for the perfect new job to come up, and if it doesn't, you're no worse off than you were before. You can even take a sick day here and there, go on interviews, and turn any job offers down if they're not mind-blowingly better than where you are now.
Update, she has a cardiac arrhythmia and the doctors want to put in a pacemaker and she won't let them. Spouse thinks he can convince her on this point.
It occurs to me that I don't know as I can continue to tell the story. It's not my story; I can't tell it accurately; I shouldn't speculate; and it's about my friends, and it's not fair. If I knew more, would it be something I could post online? Maybe not.
Spouse is an occasional dwellar, by the fact that we have been friends for 34 years. I hope someday he will tell the story himself.
It isn't like you're doing an investigation for Rolling Stone, just passing ongoing glimpses to friends. :)
One of Mum's oldest friends has one of our favourite friends; tumerous growth. Fucking cancer.
The growth is malignant.
It's in his thigh and Mum says it's visible, and as hard as wood. Ignored by his wife, who went with the if-we-don't-talk-about-it-it's-not-there approach. Same woman who told Mum all I needed was "tough love" and she shouldn't let me live with them any more. And we know how that worked out. Although having mistakenly read a letter Mum sent to a friend this May I think I know what was behind that advice. Mum wrote that I was 42 and living like an 18 year old - not a word about my mental health issues or how hard I'd been fighting my addiction. Huh.
Anyway.
Prognosis not good.
The consensus seems to be that once you can actually SEE cancer, you're looking at excising it. And it's high up enough that it would mean a complete limb amputation. 73. Not a great age for massive surgery.
Still, the full diagnosis is not yet in. There is still a little hope.
I don't like his wife, but he was always very kind to me. He's in the system now, so at the very least he'll be getting some pain relief. He's been in serious pain for well over a year now.
In different news, I went to see Still Alice last night (special showing at Otley Courthouse with a Q&A after). Yes, I knew it would upset me. Yes, I cried. I cried my way through my own tissue and then through the one the man next to me offered. Fuck dementia as well.
It's lymphoma. He's going through chemo. Part hospital based, part home care.
And it's not just in his thigh, it's affected some of his major organs.
But he is not in pain any more.
So he's probably happier than he's been in the last year.
I lost my shit on a bunch of customers today in a very big way, although it was only 1/10 of what I had for them.
Maybe I'll get fired. It was pretty intense, even if they were total douche bags. I did, however, warn my boss that I was a ticking time bomb and he might want to deal with these people himself.
He did, I guess because he had to ring them up.
Sorry, man. I hope the boss is understanding.
Thanks.
I wrote out a more detailed post but wasn't sure how identifiable it might be.
The f bomb was dropped, among others and aspersions against people's parents
I lost my shit on a bunch of customers today in a very big way, although it was only 1/10 of what I had for them.
Maybe I'll get fired. It was pretty intense, even if they were total douche bags. I did, however, warn my boss that I was a ticking time bomb and he might want to deal with these people himself.
He did, I guess because he had to ring them up.
I don't know, I thought one of the hardest parts for me of my job - or any service job where you interact with people - is having to keep nice and calm when they are behaving like complete douchebags.
But today I stayed in after my shift for a few minutes with my boss to handle the morning pressure, and had a phone call of just that kind, and my boss was like "why are you... No just hang up. you don't need to take that shit, when someone talks like that just hang up."
Hopefully your employer thinks the same.
It's a bit awkward because we are friends. Not super close, but we've known each other a long time. I know he has issues with this class of customer too, (twice the work, half the money)
On the one hand, he'd rather not have these people as customers, on the other, he doesn't want to turn business away.
I took the next three days off. This was supposed to be a very pert time thing helping out friends who were short staffed, but it has become more than part time and I can't really handle that amount of stress at this point.
I guess I'll find out this friday.
I know I didn't say anything he wasn't thinking.
I know I didn't say anything he wasn't thinking.
This helps, I'm sure.
Don't you wish every conflict had douchebags though?
The tough situation - who also happen to be my answer for the thread title today - are those that are annoyingly lacking in douchebags, the ones where everyone just does what makes sense and is perfectly right from their perspective out of where they sit on the board, but in the meantime this reshapes the board and bring it to slowly collapse on itself into a shitty game where everyone looses to different degrees.
Examples include the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, developing countries vs the green movement, and as I found out last night, my would-be love life.
I am pissed off at myself for not truly realizing what the situation was until after I've put myself out there and have become way too emotionally invested, pathetically failing to comfort myself with some degree of pride in making the choice to opt-out of the game once I did realize what was happening, and overall extremely disappointed at what it means, sporadically cursing and punching walls every time it sinks in a few more inches into the emotional mud.
The worst part is, I would have probably "won", except that in this case winning just meant loosing slowly with more pain rather then faster with less. I chose less. Maybe one day, under different circumstances... Wishful thinking.
This:
http://www.mlive.com/news/ann-arbor/index.ssf/2015/08/saline_teen_injured_in_car_cra.html#incart_river
I read about the crash and saw the cars and then... the polo coach emailed parents and told us it was a friend of the team and she had told the boys and it didn't look good. Hector was visibly shaken when I picked him up from practice. Thor is away at band camp and doesn't know yet. My kids all knew this polo player. He coached Thor this summer. He's Hebe's age. Saline and Skyline come together to form Wolverine Water Polo out of season. The varsity polo team are away at a tournament, so Hector has support, at least. Oh Fuck. Just needed a little outlet for my grief I guess.
I'm just
Sorry to hear that, monster, stay strong for the kids, but that doesn't mean brush it off by any means. You can help them grieve while you do, it's easier together, knowing you're not alone in your feelings.
So sorry to hear this, monster.
That's a horrible message to have to deliver to your kids. I am sorry.
That is terrible.
Much lower level: Pete took Lil G to try to get the passport process underway. Remind me to stop blanket defending postal workers.
Very sorry to hear that, monster. Terrible news.
From Mum. She's referring to my fuck lymphoma card, which had an E-type Jag on the front, because that man does love his cars.
[abbreviated names for privacy]
Spoke to D yesterday to make sure P was still at home and not back in hospital.
She was full of the ‘lovely card’ you sent P. Said it made them both laugh so much and cheered him up no end.
She asked me to thank you with all her heart.
He is depressed at present, no wonder. Not sure if I told you but the consultant has now confirmed it is Burkitt's Lymphoma *.
A very aggressive cancer.
He is to go into SMH early September for 5 nights to be put back on a chemo drip which will have something else added to aid that particular form of cancer.
He is still taking lots of tablets at home but the main treatment must take place under constant supervision. At least he will be local and D, and the family, will not have to go back and forth to Oxford to see him. I think the thought of going back into hospital has got to P as he was so bright when he came out. We visited them on the Sunday before our trip and he was great.
* my asterisk.
From
here (MacMillan cancer charity link)
BL is a fast-growing (aggressive) lymphoma and needs to be treated quickly. Intensive chemotherapy is the main treatment. This is usually given as an inpatient.
Given the amount of time he has already been suffering, I have a bad feeling about this.
Found out last week that not one, but four staff got into my oncology records last winter multiple times over several weeks. Just for shits and giggles, apparently. Right around then all the daily death-wishing and hopes for maiming and other disasters started, and went on until the end of May when the staff of the practice we share space with got so disgusted they told me. They'd told my managers in April but nothing was done. I overheard a phone call to my nurse manager in the late winter in which she was being chastised, and she was highly nervous when she hung up; still, I didn't know details and never heard anything from the hospital. I forgot about it until it popped back into my head during a meeting with the CEO on Aug 14, and like a dummy I blurted out, "I think X got into my medical records!" He looked at me sideways and asked, "Have you filed a complaint?" I shook my head, still processing the memory (chemo brain), and he said heartily that the great thing was not to look back but to move forward.
So on getting home I moved forward by picking up the phone and requesting an audit. And now I know, except that it's much nastier than I ever imagined and makes me sick. The hospital covered it up too, and then blamed me for all the shite that happened after.
I am just drained. This has been the worst year ever.
Bloody hell, hon, what a total headfuck.
God's teeth, some people are just fucking weird. What goes through their brains? Baffling.
I was wondering how you were. Nice to see you - wish you weren't having to deal with this shit.
WTF... OK, there's a few layers of fucked up there. How do you even get your shit and giggles from looking at someone's tumor pics to began with? How does that become a giggle worthy moment?
I know, right? That's several steps beyond normal workplace douchebaggery.
He looked at me sideways and asked, "Have you filed a complaint?" I shook my head, still processing the memory (chemo brain), and he said heartily that the great thing was not to look back but to move forward.
How transparent. Move forward without the lawsuit part? Nuh-uh!! The stakes just got RAISED!!
Are these not at least four provable HIPAA violations, due to willful neglect and not corrected, each of which indicates between $50,000 and $1,500,000 in fines, and up to a year in jail for each offender?
http://www.ama-assn.org/ama/pub/physician-resources/solutions-managing-your-practice/coding-billing-insurance/hipaahealth-insurance-portability-accountability-act/hipaa-violations-enforcement.page?I know, right? That's several steps beyond normal workplace douchebaggery.
I don't even know what it is.
It feels like it's somewhere between
evil and necktie. WTF is going on there? What's making them tick that way?
I realize the hypocrisy of saying this while condemning them for what they did to orthodoc, but I am having the strongest urge to play around and pick apart their brain matter.
How transparent. Move forward without the lawsuit part? Nuh-uh!! The stakes just got RAISED!!
Are these not at least four provable HIPAA violations, due to willful neglect and not corrected, each of which indicates between $50,000 and $1,500,000 in fines, and up to a year in jail for each offender?
http://www.ama-assn.org/ama/pub/physician-resources/solutions-managing-your-practice/coding-billing-insurance/hipaahealth-insurance-portability-accountability-act/hipaa-violations-enforcement.page?
There is no way to privately sue (directly) for a HIPAA violation. The government can pursue criminal charges against both covered entities and individuals if it decides that files were accessed for personal gain or with malicious intent ... I would say the latter applies in my case, and I hope the government agrees, but who knows. Maybe publicly wishing and hoping for my death every day for three months doesn't meet the test. Depending on how many times my records were accessed over that multi-week period, every time is a separate violation with its own penalty. Also, the failure to notify and correct carries fines for every day not corrected. After all these months, that's going to add up. So the hospital is going to be unhappy about that. The fines will probably be more than I would collect in a lawsuit.
A lawsuit would have to be for invasion of privacy and/or emotional distress, damage to reputation, etc. It is possible but it can't be related directly to the HIPAA violations.
With egregious HIPAA violations, some people have been criminally charged in recent years just for snooping, as a deterrent to the sort of thing that has happened to me. Jail time hasn't been huge - months, usually - but has occasionally been handed out, and often fines in the $thousands along with community service. I think it's appropriate. I don't think anyone wants to imagine people snickering over their surgeries or private medical information, or taking it into the front lobby of the clinic.
Right now I am just depressed. Everyone tells me to be angry but I just want to climb into bed and disappear.
Let your lawyer figure out the best course of action. Call Saul ASAP.
You go get paid. Are you kidding me. Cancer patient mistreated by unlawful staffers. Come on now. Once charges come out, lawyers should line up behind you.
Right now I am just depressed. Everyone tells me to be angry but I just want to climb into bed and disappear.
Is that the way of the Canucks? Fuckin' Sergeant Preston wouldn't go to bed, Wayne Gretzky wouldn't go to bed. :headshake But if you insist, want some company?
Get pissed and go on a tear. Lawyer up, testify before Congress, write up the whole story for the internet to be outraged over. Make an example of the scum, demand the death penalty. Well maybe not that, but forehead branding, and they'll never work in this town again.
If you want to be in charge, and demand people do their jobs properly... and I'll bet you do, you've got to have thick skin, because they'll see you as the common enemy. Fine, but you also have to have the courage to take these clowns to the woodshed when they cross the line. You go girl!
I knew I remembered something about this...
http://cellar.org/showthread.php?t=30905
Orthodoc, I think you might have had the right instinct back then - to leave. Is that still viable or is the tumor business creating medical bills that make it less then wise?
Right now I am just depressed. Everyone tells me to be angry but I just want to climb into bed and disappear.
Let the lawyers take care of angry. you take care of you.
Thanks all. I think I need to refill my energy tank, there's lots of anger, just out of energy right this minute. Luckily the personal lawsuits don't have to be filed now - there's no deadline, I'm told. I took a short leave to get calm after finding out how bad the violations were - I was expecting one snooping session by the nurse manager, not what was found - I couldn't bear to look at her the rest of the day. I don't know if she'll still be there when I return, or if they'll have sacked her in the two weeks I'm off. I know what I'd do in their shoes, but who knows. They haven't done the sensible thing so far.
I am definitely going independent, one way or another. I had just proposed going independent the week before this happened, and the CEO was open to it. No formal negotiations had started, though. I should probably get things going pronto - the ONLY decent office space in town is in the hospital's new building. There is literally nothing else here. I would have to rent old industrial space and completely renovate at my own expense otherwise - possible but very expensive - and wouldn't have any access to radiology services without the hospital's blessing, and I do need radiology. Again, I will check into alternatives because in some ways being utterly separate would be nice. But this is a one-trick-pony town. I could leave but there's a huge need here for Occ Med with no competition, really. I'd like to stay. Also don't want the misery of selling this place and moving. The real estate market here is dead, we'd take a bath.
I bet a short meeting with a lawyer will do wonders for your energy tank, like Griff said, let them do all the angry.
I don't know what type of practice you want to open, but my GP (PCP will always be angel dust in my mind) has her office on the first floor of a tiny house. There's a waiting room, a bathroom, a small room with scale, BP machine, washer/dryer, and the examining room. It looks just like a house. The only doctor office-y stuff is an eye chart and an examining table with paper, and I think there is a glass jar with cotton balls, but I may just be adding that myself to fill out the picture.
It's a micro-practice.
http://www.impcenter.org/
http://www.aafp.org/fpm/2007/0900/p27.html
http://idealmedicalpractices.org/static/JFPM2007-8.pdfand wouldn't have any access to radiology services without the hospital's blessing, and I do need radiology.
Buy a hunk of plutonium from the Russian black market and negative plates. You're good to go.
Oh, and some cheap expendable help. ;)
orthodoc, you have a ton of advice here, take your pick, I won't pile on.
however, I'm really happy to hear from you again, despite these fucked up circumstances. I feel bad for you and the ... words fail me... seriously fucked up work situation. I've had my own fill of that shit and it's poison, I'm so sorry.
I know you have the things you need to succeed--mettle, resilience, intelligence, creativity, and at the risk of sounding self serving, friends. Don't overlook the fact that you have friends.
Please, please keep in touch.
Yes, she has all those qualities, but a serious handicap to being a manager. She's too attractive to be feared. When dressing down a subordinate, they don't hear a word, they're occupied with, man, she's hot, even the ladies. :yesnod:
So, orthodoc, I remembered a story from a couple months ago about the
mistreatment of a patient by the medical staff. In this case, the anesthesiologist mocks the patient, and the others in the room join in with junior high school "humor", it's all very juvenile, and utterly unprofessional. Turns out the patient had his phone set to record and when he played it back after the procedure, all the audio had been captured. In court, he got $500,000.
I wonder if there's any applicable precedent in this case for you to take advantage of.
Maybe I can get the name of his lawyer, haha.
But with my luck, there won't be comparable statutes in PA. There will be ridiculously high bars to proving emotional distress or invasion of privacy, or something.
Sorry, I'm irritable after talking to a glassbowl lawyer yesterday who was very dismissive. I'm talking to another one tomorrow, however. At least there's no deadline for personal injury lawsuits. I do have to get a few things ironed out in the very short term, before going back to work; I'm focusing on that right now. Then I'll work on lining up someone for the personal stuff. It seems that I have to have a diagnosis (and treatment) from a licensed therapist/psychiatrist/psychologist in PA to even have an emotional distress case considered. Invasion of privacy can fall under one of four areas, and this does seem to fit at least one. However, one thing at a time. I have to go back to work soon, and I don't want to be sitting 4 feet from the worst offender (or so it seems); have to get to work on that.
I've got nothing that hasn't already been said. Chin up, rest up, and let the lawyers chew up what needs chewing up. Concentrate on you.
Hiya Ortho!!
Sorries 'bout the shitstorm.
So we seem to all be focusing on the shitty coworkers making fun (?!) at tumor pics, and not on the fact there is a tumor to have pics of...
Orth, are you... Dying?
Only of embarrassment at the moment, she's been fighting this for awhile, and I think winning so far.
The appointment Mum couldn't miss (referred to in the Bumming your Stone thread) was the results of a cancer check-up. I kinda knew it was, because I couldn't think of anything else as important that she wanted to keep secret.
What I didn't know is that she'd been having pain for a few weeks, in a specific location (part of her breast.)
Results today.
She has breast cancer. Again.
It's been caught early, as it was last time. But last time I was living with them and could help, even though sometimes she felt I was more of a hindrance...
I've done most of my crying. Away from her of course.
And I did what I was ostensibly here to do - look after Dads, take him shopping and make sure he had his medication with food at the right time.
But bloody hell. I wasn't prepared for this,
And no, I know it's not a death sentence. But it shakes my world to its core. And I shake enough anyway.
All my thoughts are with Mum though. She has Dad and me to worry about, let alone her own health (this is the order in which she'll think about things).
I love her very much.
Shine on, that's horrible on top of everything else. I know she'll be ok, that they caught it early, but it's bloody unfair she (and you) has to deal with this crap.
*hugs*
I'm sorry Sundae. That's horrible.
That sucks.
Glad it was caught early... Still. Once people start adding the word "again" to breast cancer and legitimately been able to sing "hello breast cancer my old friend I've come to cry from you again"... Can't something be done to stop the repeats? If not an outright mastectomy then at least emptying them from mammary glands and replacing them with whatever plastic surgeons use these days... IDK, there has to be something that's more practical then having a seasonal on/off relationship with something that horrible.
Mum's immediate reaction? "Take it off - take both of them off if necessary."
But that's not appropriate for the type of cancer, apparently.
I don't know why and I won't pretend - all I know is what she told me, Mum would have them lopped off without a second thought if it would help, but has been told it won't.
Fuck cancer.
Sent by thought transference
I'm sorry, Sundae. You all deserve hugs.
Fucking fuck. So sorry Sundae. :(
She had her first appointment today.
It's Grade 3. For people who haven't had experience with cancer, that's teh serious. Not the worst, I admit. But still more serious than we all thought.
It may be a full mastectomy AND chemo AND that might not work anyway.
But they have to let patients know the worst case scenario, so it might not be as bad as that.
Initial surgery scheduled for 7-8 October. Mum wants me there to look after Dad, and in case she comes home and there's complications (hemorrhage was suggested as a potential.) However slight the possibility is, Dads would not know what to do if that happened.
Christmas in London may be cancelled.
I laughed it off to Mum, wanting her to know I didn't care and she was more important.
I will cry if we can't go though. Because the above is true - she is FAR more important than a silly hotel visit. It's just I know what she's invested in it - how important it was for her, to have a special Christmas while Dad was still capable of dealing with it - even if he didn't remember it.
Sorry that I'm being all maudlin.
I know I'm not the only person with things to deal with here.
I'm just laying it out as I feel it, trying to cope with it without the old poor me, poor me, pour me another.
Not maudlin. Facing up to shit and feeling teh sad. This is allowed. In fact this is the place for all that. Massive cyber-hugs, dear! X
Sent by thought transference
Sundae, so so sorry to hear this - horrible for you, horrible for your mum, just so sorry. Fuck cancer. Please don't apologize for being upset, of course you're upset.
I am so sorry you're dealing with so much. :(
Sorry, Sundae. Give your mom and dad an extra hug for us when you visit.
Why can't I just be a normal, decent, achieving daughter?
Poor Mum. Saddled with me as well as cancer.
Yes, I am going to try to step up, but despite what this Govt says, mental health issues aren't just stupid lazy people making stupid lazy lifestyle choices.
I NEED to be well to help Mum. I'm terrified. And if I am, what is she?
Stage 3 cancer. 1” size.
Will have a lumpectomy Thursday 8th October. If sentinel lymph node shows no sign of cancerous cells then he will continue with the lumpectomy. If cells show cancer then the next gland will be taken then the next etc. I will need chemo then. Followed by radio therapy and tablets for 5 years.
Also I will be given a full mastectomy if the cells have spread.
Lot of ifs and buts.
Let’s hope it’s all plain sailing, then radio therapy afterwards. Plus medication of course. Also I would probably have to have tablets to stop osteoporosis like [edited] does. End up taking more tablets than dad.
Sundae, by helping your mum already, by being there for her, you ARE a normal, decent, achieving daughter.
Sent by thought transference
Sundae, by helping your mum already, by being there for her, you ARE a normal, decent, achieving daughter.
Sent by thought transference
This. To be repeated many times.
I'm just catching up - hon, this is a horrible thing for you all to be dealing with, cut yourself some slack.
Sundae, by helping your mum already, by being there for her, you ARE a normal, decent, achieving daughter.
Sent by thought transference
limey has hit the nail on the head there, good and proper.
You're doing just fine.
More then normal actually.
I think it's Bruce that likes to say not to compare your genuine inside to other's made up outside? Most people are all talk and would like to think the most of what they'd do if, but all to often when shit hits he fan they react to their mother getting cancer as something that is entirely happening to them - not to their mother. In contrast - it seems to me you are stepping up and trying to be there for her, measuring yourself to what you'd like to be and give to her in her time of need. Normal is not a particularly high bar in this case, and it seems you are jumping way above it.
I'm just laying it out as I feel it, trying to cope with it without the old poor me, poor me, pour me another.
I'm sure there are a million thoughts going through your head, that's normal. But these thoughts don't flash in a logical order and it's confusing. Writing it down here forces you to kind of organize your thoughts. Write something, read it, and say yeah that's right, or no, and rewrite it. It's a big help and we don't mind, it lets you and us understand, so write away. :thumb:
Things aren't going well in my head.
I'm not coping. I'm sure I will again soon, but in the mean time if my reactions seem a little "off" it's because I'm going through one of those dips again.
Very hard to communicate effectively.
I've had to reach out to two people who have been very kind in return, but I'm trying not to spread the whole weariness any further.
And no, this isn't directly related to anything my family are going through. Only indirectly because it's affecting my mental health.
That's all.
Go and see that sympathetic doctor, Sundae. Maybe a little rebalancing of meds in the light of recent strains on you is needed? xxx
Seconded. A little help in that direction can go a long way. Sending good thoughts.
today there was a head on collision on a bridge here in town. a tour bus and an amphibious tourist vehicle collided head on. four people dead at the scene, twelve critically injured, another thirty or more with injuries. it's very tragic. the tour bus was full of foreign exchange students enroute to or from a local community college. the "ride the duck" was full of tourists.. two other vehicles were involved in the crash. the road's been shut down for hours. "we're contacting the consulates in an effort to reach the families" so sad.
That's awful! :(
Sent by thought transference
Just had a call from Mum.
She is seriously angry [ftr she has just had a cancerous tumour excised]
I know my Mum.
I know she deals with stress/ hurt/ problems with anger. Really bad anger.
And she's going through a terrible situation. I just hoped the fury would take a little bit longer to arrive.
She's already accused me of not keeping the place clean.
She left at 06.50, and yes'm, I have managed to keep it clean.
She assumed I did not make sure Dads took his tablets (he did)
And when she called, she interrupted me talking about Auntie Joyce who is in hospital, because she was far too tired. AFTER asking me how she was.
Having cancer does not make you a nicer person.
But I do love her and just sounding off here.
Sorry, Sundae. It's not fair, but at least you know her well enough to know where she's coming from. You're a good egg.
Yeah, that sucks. Be thankful you understand where it's coming from, and not your fault. Be strong and soldier on.
On the personal aspect of "
bullshit kills people":
In the mean time, back in the short term world, things are very tense around here lately, because a couple of the stabbing incidents were in the city I live in, and a lot of the pressure to provide additional security falls on city hall, where I work.
Everyone is up and armed about that the whole freaking week. Every night I get calls from concerned parents, some of them directly linked to the events and that's all I can say, some just terrified from the atmosphere and the media.
Every day since this wave started, every morning, everyone shouting at each other and fighting about what responsibility falls on who and screaming out the same old political garbage.
I need to be this super nice agreeable person all the time, because 90% of this job is diplomacy, and yet all I really want to do is to get up and call out everyone on their bullshit. My blood is boiling and I need to act like it's the nice calming steam of a relaxing cup of tea. And the worst part is, I have become shockingly good at it. Shocking for me anyway. Probably to anyone who has ever known me too. Which is exactly the change of personality life has being demanding for me, and yet I can't help but feel like I am loosing so much of myself in this... On both directions, I am more agreeable and diplomatic then ever when it seems consequential and more of a prick who pushes people away when it's unlikely to be, and yet neither feels like the fun yet prickly self I used to be.
Sounds like a bag of stress, trace :(
Remember it's not you, you're not lying, not being deceitful, it's your job, like an actor playing a roll. Don't be ashamed of becoming good at it, that's what they hired you to do.
Oh sorry - that probably portrays me better then I am - it wasn't intentional: Let me clarify that for me this isn't an issue of guilt, it's an issue of restraint. My problem isn't dishonesty on an ethical basis, it's having to keep all of what I really think inside.
That's what makes actors good at their job. You can portray the sympathetic shoulder to lean on, then kick a puppy on the way home. ;)
My problem isn't dishonesty on an ethical basis...
Yeah, we know that much. Milk thief...:p:
Yeah, we know that much. Milk thief...:p:
That actually worked out really well - they increased the amount of milk they buy. Now a co worker of mine gets to have cereal at work every shift, and I never end up not having enough for coffee. Plus I helped stimulate the economy, and presumably some cow's nipples, which is the most action I've gotten in awhile. Lesson learned:I should steal things more often. I've had my eyes on those sticky notes...
Update, she is still with us but in pain. Sometimes, she reports, she cannot bend over to get pots and pans on the lower shelves. Some days, she reports, she can't walk from one end of the house to the other without pain.
Update, she went for spinal surgery and they found that her L4 vertebrae is devastated due to new cancer they have found. We shall now see whether this convinces her that modern medicine is her better choice. This is her husband's great hope. She had been going to chiropractic for months for it. They have fused other spinal bones and hope her back works well enough to get along, and advised the next round of treatment.
It is just terrible.
So sorry. Chiropractic for this, oh god ... I can't imagine. Wrenching bones that are already disintegrated and forcing them past ... aggh. So sorry to hear all of this, the entire situation is terrible as you say.
I agree, I've had good luck with Chiropractors but I wasn't broken, just bent.
God damn it... Just followed the post-chain on your friend, UT. And it has gone on for awhile, I am hoping modern medicine still has some time.
That's... How do you deal with a situation like that?
I mean, here's your friend just when she needs support more then ever and hard truth more then ever, while been a self-destructive idiot and yet having every right to be a self destructive idiot. How the fuck do you navigate that terrain?
You have the argument your whole life, but there is this point where you aren't entitled any longer, and then you just don't have it. You just leave it on the floor.
My friend was going to have the argument yesterday with her ("Do you want to see your children graduate high school?") but she was still too groggy and in pain.
I can't judge her decision.
Coming from my perspective as a healthy person, I would like to think that I would fight like hell in her situation. The kids! But who knows how I would feel if it was me?
An acquaintance's husband committed suicide a couple days ago.
They have kids aged 10 and 7, both with autism. She's been a stay-at-home mom since the older one (who is low-functioning) got diagnosed as a toddler. She manages a small amount of income from some rental properties, but is otherwise up shit creek.
But never mind all that. I get it. Depression lies, the suicidal person may genuinely believe that his loved ones would be better off without him, or that there simply is no other choice. Okay, fine. But I'm pissed because he did it in the house where his fucking kids could find him, and that is bullshit. Your depression may tell you that your family is better off without you, but if it tells you that your children with severe anxiety issues ought to stumble upon your mutilated body, you've got some other shit going on.
Drive off a cliff. Threaten a cop and get him to shoot you. Rent a goddamn hotel room. Or at least do it with pills so they're only partially horribly scarred for life. Jesus Christ.
That's really, really fucked up. I'd guess he was mad at the kids for ruining his life, but who knows.
The only thing for sure is, he [strike] is[/strike] was a fucking dick. :mad:
Wow. That really is fucked up.
... I'd guess he was mad at the kids for ruining his life, but who knows ...
This. IMHO there is often a message in the choice of date, method, place etc.
Sent by thought transference
I read something ages ago, can't recall where, about people who commit suicide in such a way that their family find them. One of the things that came up is the idea of feeling invisible or disregarded. It may be that he felt 'ignored' by his wife given that so much of her attention would have been on the little ones. His choice of location and method may have partly been a way to force himself back to her attention, and possibly punish her for 'abandoning' him.
Doubt it would have been as clear as that though. But it may have been an element.
I read something ages ago, can't recall where, about people who commit suicide in such a way that their family find them. One of the things that came up is the idea of feeling invisible or disregarded.
That figured in in the thoughts I was having when I was having those kinds of thoughts.
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An acquaintance's husband committed suicide a couple days ago.
They have kids aged 10 and 7, both with autism. She's been a stay-at-home mom since the older one (who is low-functioning) got diagnosed as a toddler. She manages a small amount of income from some rental properties, but is otherwise up shit creek.
But never mind all that. I get it. Depression lies, the suicidal person may genuinely believe that his loved ones would be better off without him, or that there simply is no other choice. Okay, fine. But I'm pissed because he did it in the house where his fucking kids could find him, and that is bullshit. Your depression may tell you that your family is better off without you, but if it tells you that your children with severe anxiety issues ought to stumble upon your mutilated body, you've got some other shit going on.
Drive off a cliff. Threaten a cop and get him to shoot you. Rent a goddamn hotel room. Or at least do it with pills so they're only partially horribly scarred for life. Jesus Christ.
That is brutal. I have a mom deep in the well of depression right now and it is totally blowing up the family and obviously the kid.
As usual it all kinda come at once.
I had a really awful email from my Mum over the weekend. I would love to quote it here, but that is very unfair. Suffice to say it was a complaint against my father going back for years. She wanted to make it clear to me that she had had issues with him and his selfishness for long before he had Alzheimers.
Again, I know why.
I know why she directed this to me, I know why she's hurting so badly she can't keep it to herself, and although she doesn't know I know, I do know why she "started hating him" when she was in her 50s.
I also know that she has not hated him continuously all that time. And that they still love eachother. And that for many reasons she can never leave him now - part of the problem.
But reading those words really hurt. I held off replying until it stopped being about me, and made my response all about her. It's not that much of a stretch. I do love her after all. I just forget sometimes we don't get on all that well, and that my relationship with my father was always a flashpoint. The sad thing is, it still is, but neither of us can connect very well with him any more.
And then Otis is sick.
I knew something was up when he came back from the petshop (where he was boarding while I was down at Mum's) and the lady who handed him over said he was lazy/ idle/ something along those lines. No - he's fun, frisky, lively.
So when I heard him wheezing, when he didn't come for mealworms when I opened the cage door, when I went in and grabbed him up and held him under my chin for warmth (for his comfort, not mine) and he didn't try to climb on my head, I knew there was a problem.
Respiratory infection.
Two injections already. Needs to be in vets overnight.
Needs to be seen next week.
Needs to be kept in isolation when he comes home.
I've already gone out to buy a new set of bedding/ housing/ food bowls/ water bottle (for the little cage I keep them in while cleaning the McRat Mansion). He's not infectious, just that his antibiotics will be water soluble, so he can't be with Duncan. And I think that's probably what's upset me the most. They will both be so miserable without eachother.
But hey. I'm probably projecting because Mum goes back in to hospital on Thurs for a check-up.
And Diz died when I let someone else take care of him - pretty much this time last year.
And I have a bad haircut.
Ah geez. It does all come at once. Sorry, Sundae. You're taking care of everything and everyone so beautifully, but you need others too. For what it's worth, sending warmest thoughts and support. Hang in there.
Watching my kids suffer upsets me.
Watching my kids suffer upsets me.
Indeed, I know the feeling.
... especially as my G-kids try to make it today as young adults.
.
@ Sundae: ah hon, that's rough. Give us a bell if you need to vent.
@v: I'm not a parent, but I am an auntie and it broke my heart when Soph was having a difficult time earlier this year. It's never nice to see the younglings suffer, but as a parent it must cut so deep.
I have no idea what is going on with your kids, or why they are suffering, but I hope it's nothing too serious.
[eta[ ah damn, V, I just read the other thread. So sad. I can only imagine how hard this is for them. And for you seeing them go through it.
I'm sorry sundae. That email has to hurt, no matter the reasoning behind it. :(
Bigv...so sorry to you also.
There's so much pain in the world. :(
Well now.
I had a second email from Mum, which was happy and jolly and fine.
So we're back to pretending everything is okay. That's the way we roll.
But in better news, Otis is back from the vet. Gosh he's so skinny to the touch. You can't see it - both my boys are big - but I can feel all his ratty bones under the skin. I noticed it on Sunday. So he gets some extra special treats while separate from Duncan, who is stronger and quite capable of muscling him out of the way.
And the ear infection I feared has sorted itself out. Never progressed further than a bit of pain, fluid and poor hearing.
V, I'm so sorry about your situation.
I was too caught up in my own to read up on it.
And the ear infection I feared has sorted itself out. Never progressed further than a bit of pain, fluid and poor hearing.
Maybe the drum ruptured and relieved pressure? You should keep water out of that ear canal for a few weeks to avoid infection while it heals. (If it ruptured.)
The wife of one of my husband's former partners died unexpectedly late yesterday afternoon. Said that way, it sounds like we barely knew her but we were very close for more than ten years while my husband ran the ER corp in the '90s - always at each other's places, shared holiday dinners, lots of time spent together. They were the only non-family that we asked to be at our granddaughter's funeral in 2010. We drifted apart in 2011 over business issues, but the partner and my husband had been best friends for years prior. She was just 61. She was absolutely devoted to her kids; she was the 'do everything, go anywhere' mom. The family will have a very tough time.
How very sad for all concerned. You can still feel a lot for someone you've drifted apart from if they were a big part of your life for years. Hugs to you, ortho! x
I"m sorry you lost a friend, Ortho.
You can still feel a lot for someone you've drifted apart from if they were a big part of your life for years.
Sometimes that makes the loss even harder, because you think of the time you've missed.
Sorry, Ortho.
It is awkward after drifting apart. I'm very sorry for all of them. It feels odd and sad to not feel able to just reach right out as we used to. We have reached out, but they aren't in town (she was stricken while at an out of town wedding) and things are distant physically as well as emotionally. We have given them our condolences and let them know we are available to help. I feel so bad for the kids.
Anyway, they have our contact info and we'll let them know they're always welcome. Once things settle down, it gets harder.
What's upsetting you today?
Me.
Sorry ortho,
That's weak, I know, but true nonetheless. Sorry.
Mall shooting less than a mile from Auntiedigr.
:(
The VA or eye Dr. not sure which one to blame. Called to check on new glasses. Dead end everywhere. Then VA called and said had nothing from my eye DR. The fax was to be sent on the 16th. Oh well. Was too late to call them when I got the word.
What a crap system. Sorry B.
We thought Mum wouldn't have to go through chemo.
Turns out she will.
And then she sends me an email saying she's sorry she upset me (by telling me the news)
I guess I didn't manage to pass off the sniffling as well as I thought.
Of course I sent her one back saying she's the one with cancer and she should never hold off telling me the truth, and I was only upset because I love her.
But it set it all off again and I had to have a good old howl. Easier to hide that from Mum from behind a keyboard.
Oh Sundae, so so sorry to see this. Big hugs to you xxx
Out of an abundance of caution, I'm sure...:grouphug:
We're here for you, Sundae. You can type the howl out, if you want to.
Chemo is unpleasant, but not fatal. it's nothing like the images of our childhoods when it was still in it's early/experimental stages. they have a plethora of anti-nausea drugs and drugs to combat all sorts of side effects. Except the losing your hair. That is often a necessary evil. I am sorry you had thought she would not need it -it's pretty inescapable for stage 3 cancers because that means the cancer has spread outside of the original tumor, so even if they think they got it all with surgery, they can't be certain. It doesn't mean it's worse than they thought. Better chemo now than realizing they missed a bit later. On the plus side, you'll be able to help her shop for scarves etc.
Damn, hon, you're really through the mill right now. Like monster says - better this than not get it all. Sounds like they're really looking after your mum.
I know. It's better to be safe than sorry. It was just a shock.
And I honestly thought I was doing okay with it. Nearly as well as she was. So to get her apology and realise I'd upset her even
more (even more than having cancer!) was really awful.
She's still going to try to come up between now and Christmas. Before she starts treatment and gets too ill. It all depends on whether she can get my brother to stay with Dad. She loves Otley, and wants us to go to the places we couldn't because of Dad's poor mobility.
Skipton Castle,
Hebden Bridge,
Ilkley (where there's a branch of
Bettys), maybe even meet up and stay together in York instead of Otley. She could only really be away for two nights, so we couldn't do all of that - she gets tired too (she's 69 after all) and forgets that when Dad dozes off after lunch, so does she. But we'd do something fun.
Fingers crossed.
I'm not pushing this at her; it's her idea, her plan. But you bet your brass knockers I'll jump at it. My honest opinion? She's scared that this may be her last chance. Between her own understandable fear at having cancer for the second time, and Dad's dementia, she wants to pack in as much as she can. She's not on the endangered list by any means. But she's facing her own mortality, she's losing her husband and she wants to kick back and have some fun.
I'm only just now reading about your Mum, Sundae. I had no idea, mostly because I really don't keep up around this place like I used to. Please know that you're all in my thoughts, and give your Mum a hug for me. Do you think she might like some of those christmas treats again this year?
My post in the 'Short Films' thread doesn' t meet the The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences' criteria for a short film.
Do you think she might like some of those christmas treats again this year?
Don't send anything you can't afford. A card would be more than enough - she'll love to know you've thought of her.
I'll PM you their new address.
Fing X-mas music already.
Don't send anything you can't afford. A card would be more than enough - she'll love to know you've thought of her.
I'll PM you their new address.
I will put a small package together for her. x
Goddamned, motherfucking thieves.
I miss having a cat.
I can't have a cat. Not right now. I know that. My life is too chaotic, my flat is unhygienic and inhospitable, I have rats.
But I feel like the fictional and non-fictional accounts of a woman longing for a baby.
I want the heft of a cat in my arms. I want the feel of the fur. I want the weight against me when I sleep. I want to feel the purr. I even don't mind the Spindly Death Claws, and the games of Mad Cat Scramble and Kamikaze Death Cat (where the belly is offered to be rubbed, but attack can come at any second.)
I miss having a cat in my life so much.
Bawled my eyes out this morning.
Popped them back in to come here though.
Oh hon, I know that feeling. The seven or eight years I went without my own dog, before getting Pilau, I was just like that. I'd look at other people walking their dogs and be overwhelmed with full-on, throat-catching longing. It was never very far from my mind.
what did they take?
Nothing from me, but my friend got hit pretty hard. Most generous guy who ever lived, too, you didn't need to steal from him, he would have helped you any way he could.:mad:
I miss having a cat.
I can't have a cat. Not right now.
But I feel like the fictional and non-fictional accounts of a woman longing for a baby.
I want the heft of a cat in my arms. I want the feel of the fur. I want the weight against me when I sleep. I want to feel the purr. I even don't mind the Spindly Death Claws, and the games of Mad Cat Scramble and Kamikaze Death Cat (where the belly is offered to be rubbed, but attack can come at any second.)
I miss having a cat in my life so much.
Girl, you're telling my life. I don't want
a cat, though.
I want mine back.:sniff:
[ATTACH]54082[/ATTACH]
I shouldn't have went through those pictures, dammit.
[size=1]Something in my eye...[/size]
Mum saw the oncologist yesterday.
She's been assessed as a "medium" risk. Unlike two of her friends, who have to have hospital treatment, or one of the others who had to wait months for treatment at the other end of the scale.
They're confident that the surgeon removed the cells from the original site (breast) but not that rogue cells aren't roaming about, ready to form colonies elsewhere.
So she has to start treatment in the next few weeks.
And Mum says this may mean Christmas (in London) will have to cancelled.
Of course I immediately said that this was fine, and I'd rather have her well.
But I had a very good cry afterwards.
Because although the trip was all her idea, I didn't realise how much I'd emotionally invested in it. Had an outfit to wear, have a sack of presents, have a mini (fake) Christmas tree for their room etc etc. SO looking forward to the boat trip on the Thames, the steakhouse dinner on Christmas Eve, dressing up for lunch.
This will make me sound like a silly, spoiled child compared to what Mum must be going through. Which is of course losing all that as well, AND going through chemo, AND having to deal with Dad. But I can only tell you how I feel.
It might still happen of course. She has to wait until next Friday to get her treatment schedule. By then I'll be more resigned. I'm only upset because I heard last night and can't handle change well. And it's better that I tell you on here than let any of it leak out in my conversations with Mum.
Oh, and I might still be able to make it to Aylesbury.
My train tickets are for London, but I can travel on from there. So I can be a help and a presence at least.
Not new behavior, you've always gotten wound up about future events, like your get togethers with Dana and Limey. A significant event like family Christmas would always make you ramp up planning and anticipation. Now it's even more important, and you've more time to dedicate to it, because of not working and having large gaps in your social calendar. Add the stress of your parent's health issues hanging like Damocles Sword, I'm not surprised the tears come easy.
You can get all rational and shit, telling yourself it's silly and not a big deal compared to others' problems, but it's your safety valve. Safety valves are preset, they don't say hey, do you think it's time to relieve some pressure? Fuck no, when the time comes they do their thing automatically, and have no regard for time, place, or if they'll embarrass you in public.
So don't let it worry you, what you've been doing and thinking isn't very far from what you've always done. You ain't as crazy as you seem to think.
Well, no crazier than you've always been, anyway. :haha:
Bruce is right, and you already know that although you find it hard to cope with change your plans to see your parents and help your mum are changed, not cancelled altogether.
I've wanted for a while to point out that it is you your mum turns to every time for help and support so obviously you are doing everything right. Chin up girl! Love and hugs from all at Chateau Limey! xxx
Sent by thought transference
What bruce and Limes said.
*hugs* you're doing awesome, hon.
Sorry Sundae, that's one tough bit of news after another. I hope your mum's treatment schedule will still allow for your family Christmas plans in London. It's okay to be upset, why wouldn't you be? You're doing a fantastic job of support for your parents in a hard situation, don't let any negative thoughts convince you that you're silly or spoiled. No way.
New keyboard came from newegg today. No !@#$% drivers or manuals. :bitching:
And online banking says I have wrong username or password. WTF
Another thing to remember is that your Mum is really good at jumping to the worst conclusion, so maybe nothing will have to change in the end. :)
@buster: that sucks. Any chance of getting the manuals and drivers online?
@buster: that sucks. Any chance of getting the manuals and drivers online?
Yeah. I found them on Bill's site. Still pissed thou. 1st time screw up by newegg for me.:rolleyes:
Update, she went for spinal surgery and they found that her L4 vertebrae is devastated due to new cancer they have found. We shall now see whether this convinces her that modern medicine is her better choice. This is her husband's great hope. She had been going to chiropractic for months for it. They have fused other spinal bones and hope her back works well enough to get along, and advised the next round of treatment.
It is just terrible.
Update
I have not updated on purpose; the story takes time to develop.
They found that the original breast cancer has spread to her spine, her pelvic bone, and her liver. So it's now stage 4.
There was a period where she didn't know what to do. She investigated a "doctor" in Argentina who, for $17,000, would put her on a special anti-cancer diet. In a conference call with the guy, he claimed that chemotherapy kills millions and his diet solves cancer at a DNA level. Her husband went off on the guy.
I asked, "Did you ever consider it?" He told me "If we actually had $17,000, I would use it to put a contract out on him."
At first she was hurt that her husband would not support her. Then her friends started telling her to wise up. After the third one, she came around and announced that, yes, she would use western medicine.
This week the radiation has begun, but she has had a terrible week of opiate withdrawal, pain, emotional swings, taking doctor's orders and then not following them; being re-hospitalized for pain. In one moment of bad times she briefly wanted to can it all, but again came around.
Husband has been a rock all his life, the dependable older brother. He doesn't know how long he can be that. He is alternately furious and devastated and spun around by it all. He just wants his wife back.
He's one of my oldest friends, and he's been the guitarist for "Rocky" all this time. He wants me to play "Rent" in April. I almost want to say no because I don't know where HE will be in April. If her treatments are successful, she will be given more time, in years. If she suddenly decides to quit treatment, she will be gone by then.
I have a friend with exactly this -metastasized BD bust a vertebrae which had to be removed. She fights like all fury and is determined to live as long and as fully as possible, but occasionally finds the pain so extreme that it can be hard for her to justify continuing treatment. but she does. Beest has metastatic colon cancer. Stage 4. No real pain, this one is a silent killer. So we're doing the chemo. But it's different from most chemo. no hair loss, but extreme sensitivity to cold to a point of extreme pain. Even tap water needs to be heated to be drunk sometimes. I'm not looking forward to winter, I can't really imagine he is either, we live in the fucking arctic. But I digress, unfortunately for your friend, there just aren't any great choices, rock and a hard place. But I'm sure she isn't making obviously bad choices without care for those around her. Pain has a great knack for invading logical thought processes and diverting the stream of thought. When you hurt really badly, it can make sense to reject everything that you're doing now and go off at a tangent just to try and make it stop -like jumping off a tall cliff when you're being attacked by a swarm of bees in the hope that they won't be able to keep up with you during you descent.....
I'm sorry for everyone's suffering. Fuck cancer.
Just what, again, has been the reason for her avoidance of western medicine protocols until now? Was she raised in another culture, have a terrible experience with medical treatment here, born psychologically impaired, fried her brain on drugs, punishing everyone (maybe just her husband) because she got cancer and they didn't, attention whore extraordinaire; or, just too lazy to fight the good fight? There's more and more people gravitating to that last category who would rather die than have to work at living.
... I don't know where HE will be in April. ... If she suddenly decides to quit treatment, she will be gone by then.
Is your friend selfless enough to talk hospice with her.
At first she was hurt that her husband would not support her.
She may have been evaluating her husband's (and other's) receptiveness to a hospice conversation with that dead end scenario ... that is unless you can tell us the woman is just plain stupid or nuts.
Sorry about the predicament it puts you in.
Bottled water kept at room temperature goes down easy when I feel the need to hydrate quickly.
One of the down sides of the information age is the ability of quacks and scams to distract people with promised miracles, when looking for help. Those bastards are the lowest of the low, they don't just steal your money like a Nigerian Prince.
We hear Aunt Ruth, or Joe at work, has cancer then their gone, it's common to think cancer=death, sometimes slow and ugly, sometimes quick. I remember 40 years ago, a girl who was known as a drama queen said she had cancer, then a year later it was in remission. We all thought she had made it up for sympathy/attention. Remission, what the hell is that?
It's taken a long time for it to sink in that it's not automatic, there is treatment to put it into remission if it's detected early. Yes, maybe your GP isn't the best person to map a strategy, but he/she certainly knows a specialist who is. My mother had skin cancer at 65, and lived to be 95.
Just what, again, has been the reason for her avoidance of western medicine protocols until now?
You could say it was because she went through a shit ton of regular medicine and still found herself in her predicament. 3? miscarrages, 2 cancers and one open-heart surgery before the last breast cancer diagnosis. Maybe she got tired of all that, and wanted to believe something else.
You could say she was wooed by the
woo and still is - she was interested in some sort of woo convention around here where they are pitching healing crystals and whatnot
I can't say for sure. When her husband originally tried to talk sense into her, she quit speaking to him altogether. What are ya gonna do.
Sounds like a case of for better or for worse: he couldn't do any better and she couldn't do any worse.
It used to more often be the other way around; but, gender equality and all that jazz dontcha know.
I just realized today is the eighth anniversary of my best friend John's death. It almost got by me.
We still miss you, John.
:sniff:
:blackr:
Hugs Grav. It's always hard when it sneaks up and hits you unawares. X
Sent by thought transference
Auntie Joyce has died.
And it's unlikely I'll be able to get to her funeral.
She was a proper East End woman - stood by her man (Dad's brother Ted) through thick and thin. Laughed like a drain. Could drink for England.
I remember a night when she, Mum and I stayed up until the early hours, fuelled by Barcardi? vodka? (before I knew my drinking was a real problem) well after the "boys" gave up and went to bed. None of us could eat the next day, but she was impressed with my chops when I ordered a hair-of-the-dog.
She had a Tax Office job at a time few women of her class/ accent did. She got a good pension too, which helped see them through. She refused until the end to go into care (mentioned in this thread I think) but sadly ended up being shuttled from one home to hospital to another, to hospital and back, because she wouldn't sign consent.
Anyway, she lost the fight, as we all will in the end.
But I loved her.
It sounds like she was her own woman Sundae, a solid person to have known.
Sorry about your friend's situation Tony. Maybe we should all be considering our end of life issues.
Sorry for your loss, Sundae.
I'm sorry for your loss Sundae.
Auntie Joyce sounds like a badass, neither intimidating nor intimidated, the reason England will carry on. :thumbsup: RIP Joyce.
Like all great nieces I think you take after your Auntie, Sundae my dear x
Sent by thought transference
I've just been catching up on this thread. Hugs to all. Also, I concur with Limey's above assessment.
In hospital again. Vomiting blood from Monday.
Nil by Mouth SO thirsty!) Catheter, adult nappy (diaper), oxygen.
0n saline, & new drug, vitamins, ani biotioicts & may get a blood transfusion 2moro. Been to Surgery but too woozy to take anything in yesterday.
Sigh.
AND I Left my glasses behind!)
Shit, hon, that sounds dreadful :(
That sucks, at least you're in the right place to get fixed. :(
Wow, Sundae. That's scary.
Oh Sundae, what happened? Get better soon.
Yah. I admit I don't follow this thread very well, but reading back, I don't see an indication of what precipitated this.
I hope you're Ok, though. ....
Nope, out of left field, Jim.
So sorry to see this, Sundae. Get well soon!
Sent by thought transference
Damn girl...Hang in there.:hug:
Hugs Grav. It's always hard when it sneaks up and hits you unawares. X
Just saw this. Thank you, kind lady!
Has anyone heard from sundae? Is she ok??
I was thinking about her this morning...
Has anyone heard from sundae? Is she ok??
I was thinking about her this morning...
Sundae is still in hospital and getting better although it is something of a slow process. She'd hoped to be out today (Friday) but it was not to be, so a stay until after the weekend seems likely.
Understandably she is, by her own admission, somewhat low spirited, although this is by no means a constant condition.
Sundae has had a couple of minor procedures which have caused more than a little discomfort and she describes herself as 'sore but healing'.
Fortunately she has her mobile phone with her and we've been exchanging text messages several times a day.
BTW, the above details are posted with Sundae's approval.
Thank you for keeping us in the loop. I started worrying on the way home from work.
Carruthers is a good egg.
Sidestep: Many years ago, when I was young and stupid and most of my friends were drug dealers and oddballs, 'good egg' was the highest compliment that could be paid to anyone. Always used to make me smile that. When Nutty Paul (I'm not being bitchy, that was how he was known by all and to his face) a man seemingly carved from granite and graffitied with self-applied tattoos, would say in all seriousness, in his thick Bolton accent that this or that person was a good egg.
BTW, the above details are posted with Sundae's approval.
That's a given for a gentleman of your distinction.
But be aware, you are allowed to rat her out to us without it. :lol:
Thanks for letting us know. That sounded scary.
Keep your chin up, sundae, you can weather this.
(Good egg is a great phrase. I use it sometimes too.) :)
Carruthers is a good egg.
I believe that. I really do.:thumb::thumb:
Thank you, kind sir, for the info on our Sundae.
...When Nutty Paul (I'm not being bitchy, that was how he was known by all and to his face)...
I know a guy who we all refer to as Crazy Paul. I kid you not. And that's how everyone refers to him, too, even when talking to him. He's crazy, and he knows he's crazy. I think that makes him just a little bit saner than the other crazy people.
Small world. Or Crazy Paul really gets around!
I know a guy who we all refer to as Crazy Paul. I kid you not. And that's how everyone refers to him, too, even when talking to him. He's crazy, and he knows he's crazy. I think that makes him just a little bit saner than the other crazy people.
Small world. Or Crazy Paul really gets around!
There was a sitcom here about a pot dealer, set entirely in his flat, as his friends and customers dropped in and out - his scary supplier was known as Mad Paul.
Along with Nutty Paul, I also had friends who went by the names of Mad Sharon, Fingers Geoff, Nervous Pete, Little Pete (to differentiate him from Big Pete, who moved out of the area before I lived there), Kenny the Burglar and Dancing Max (who died tragically young)
Sounds like an East End (of London) gang!
Sent by thought transference
At first glance yes - but put in context, it's significantly naffer. You have to imagine all of those names pronounced with a Bolton accent, whilst sitting in a shabby Bolton bedsit.
Think Phoenix Nights: (nsfw language)
[YOUTUBE]W_qbqTfaPPI[/YOUTUBE]
Funny thing is, aside from Mad Sharon* it was mainly only the lads who had nicknames like that.
*with whom I once spent a memorable afternoon, whilst the lads were all off doing some shit or other at the garage, as she showed me Faces of Death and waxed lyrical about how she watches it several times a day and she rewinds the bit where the guy's jaw collapses during a firing squad execution many more times - thankfully she'd watched it so much the tape had worn and the image was snowy and the sound crackly - she then topped that off by saying how much she liked spending time with me as I was the only one that seemed to 'get' her - cue frozen in place warm and friendly smile. I never found out if the rumours of her having an axe in her bedroom were true and nor did I seek to
K. I'll stop hijacking the thread now :P
Chin Up Sundae, lass, we're all thinking of you.
Well it's obvious now she needs a Bolton Gang Name to cheer her up.
Just checking in/catching up ... feel better, Sundae! And thanks, Carruthers, for the update.
Just a quick update....
I had a chat with Sundae a few minutes ago and she expects to be discharged from hospital tomorrow (Monday 7th).
She's had a bit of a battering this week but things are moving in the right direction.
I hope that she'll be able to check in here in a couple of days to bring you all up to date.
Not upsetting per se - more pissing me off - but I can't be arsed trying to find the other thread and this one popped up on New Posts.
The reason I can't be arsed looking is the reason I am posting. Phone and internet are suffering some sort of intermittent fault. They were down completely for a couple of hours yesterday and they were both down again when I got up this morning and didn't start working again until about 10:30. In betweemn the total outages every thing is a bit rocky. Phone calls have a lot of background hiss and my connection is cooky as hell.
I hate not having stable internet. It's been really quite well-behaved just lately and I got lulled into a false sense of security and then it remembered it's in a semi-rural Yorkshire village and reverted to type.
Actually, I think there's a problem at the exchange because a few other people are having problems and I can't get through to TalkTalk for love nor money because they are experiencing high call volumes. In theory I can go to their website and view current system problems and ongoing outtages across the network - but their site is a delicate flower and cannot load without the full trimmings of a stable connection.
#bottomrungfirstworldproblems
35-0
Then 35-7
There goes the shutout.
F!!@### paypal. Sis sent me a few bucks. Well it didn't show up. After all the Bs, I had to transfer it from their account to my bank. So they have been using that money for a few day. Which just might be big money over time.
When you're really, really upset and you know no-one can help/definitely not the person in front of you, but someone bugs you to tell them anyway and eventually you think what do I have to lose? So you tell them and then they say back off like you have the plague
Lump of coal for Christmas.
When you're really, really upset and you know no-one can help/definitely not the person in front of you, but someone bugs you to tell them anyway and eventually you think what do I have to lose? So you tell them and then they say back off like you have the plague
Shit - that sounds rough.
Yikes. Hope it all works out.
I'm upset by people who park their cars illegally in handicapped spaces. Like the asshole right over there. I'm at the grocery store, and off work, no particular place to go, etc. It's a new Toyota Corolla, with standard license plates and no placard hanging from the rear view mirror, nor on the dash, nothing.
I'm just gonna sit here and wait for them to return to their car. I will make abundantly clear that he's parked illegally. I fucking hate it.
Don't assume it's a he. It could be someone who forgot to hang the placard or so old and feeble they couldn't hang it properly and it fell when they closed the door.
Just to be sure, shoot them on site... and steal their groceries. :lol2:
I don't really give a rip about their gender, it's just a common pronoun convention. I've seen female assholes do the same shit, so to speak.
As for being too feeble to hang the tag, fine maybe. But it's still illegal, even if they're entitled. How else is a vigilante like me supposed to tell the ass holes from the merely dumb asses?
How else is a vigilante like me supposed to tell the ass holes from the merely dumb asses?
I told you...
Just to be sure, shoot them on site... and steal their groceries.
OK, I misspell sight, sorry.
Maybe they have mobility issues, but have not yet acquired the tag. Maybe they have mobility issues that aren't properly covered by the scheme. I know over here some people have struggled to get parking badges for stuff like ME or intermittently severe sciatica, or whilst recovering from injury.
They may need the space without being legally entitled to occupy it.
Or they're inconsiderate twats.
Difficult to say without knowing their story :P
They may need the space without being legally entitled to occupy it.
I need a free bus pass. I'm not legally entitled to it (thanks ATOS!)
See how far that gets me with a bus driver.
After my Dad had his knee replacement he couldn't walk without a stick for weeks or without pain for longer. He still refused to use Grandad's disabled parking badge unless Grandad was in the car with him. I have little patience with people who abuse those spaces.
That said, I remember having a bit of a row with Rkzenrage, who believed if you could walk around a supermarket you should not be entitled to a badge...
People have strong opinions about those spots. Based in emotion mostly.
I've needed to use those spots before with a passenger, but didn't have the placard. And then I was given a placard to use, but had no need for it because my passenger was in assisted living then and we weren't running errands. Too bad we can't base use of them on the honor system.
I've had one for years. I talked my doctor into signing for one so I could park inside the plant where there was a huge parking lot only a quarter full right outside my department door. But I never used it in the real world until recently, and still don't, if I have a choice that within a reasonable distance.
I see a lot of abuse, by presumably family members, using a card issued for someone else. Granted it's hard to tell, but when 20ish kid pulls in with a grandpa car, jumps out and runs into a store, I get suspicious. In fairness, he might just be robbing the place.
It's funny, I don't even see the handicapped spots. But then I find the idea of "hunting" for a good spot to be completely inefficient and stupid anyway. I take the first spot I come across, even if it's near the back, and walk in. 90% of the time I get to the door faster than the moron slowly prowling the aisles.
Just to be sure, shoot them on si[ght]
Lest he be shot himself...
Be polite, be professional, but have a plan to kill everybody you meet.
~Gen. James 'Mad Dog' Mattis, USMC (Ret)
I like that quote, Grav!
I had a temporary handicapped parking tag while I was having chemo, and I needed it then. Couldn't walk more than about 50 ft without having to sit down and rest. And when the handicapped spots were filled by cars without tags, and those 20-somethings dashed into the store from their illegally-parked car full of vim and vigor, their choices meant that I couldn't hobble in and get my few groceries, because I couldn't walk across the whole parking lot. (Re Rkzenrage: I sat down A LOT in the grocery store - I knew where their benches/seats were and plotted my path from rest stop to rest stop.)
My tag expired in 2013, a few months after chemo, which was appropriate. I have no sympathy for those who abuse the system, but my lack of sympathy doesn't matter. Somehow, they always get away with it.
See it all the time too. We mostly don't even use ours anymore. Good for him to walk as much as possible etc.
Many times the placards are broke, have been lost or stolen. What most do not know is that there is a card issues with the tag. Ask them for that instead of accepting the "I lost it" excuse. Then shoot them and steal their groceries.
OR do what I do - park them in. (just kidding)
:idea: You're right, I forgot about the wallet card.
Wait what? I never got a wallet card. I feel gypped. :eyebrow:
You should have looked in the glove box instead of just grabbing the tag off the mirror and running. :lol:
Seriously though, there's no name on the hang tag, so you need the wallet card to prove it's being used by the right person. I've had mine for 20 years and never been challenged, but just in case. I tried to scan it but the printed card is white lettering on an extremely light violet. The name/address and tag number is black print, but that's all that shows in a scan.
This fucker will burn in hell.
We're not supposed to talk about specifics online, because it's an ongoing investigation, blah blah blah. But it was not a "fight," and the park is only falling back on the "contractors" label for PR spin--many if not a majority of their employees are technically contractors.
Just know that if that fucker had been able to sneak a gun into the park, a bunch of people would be dead, including children and families. And the guy in critical condition is not nobody.
How long until the full story breaks?
I dunno. His wife is meeting with a lawyer on Tuesday, though I think that's a who's-gonna-pay-for-this-medical-care thing, not a prosecution thing. They got the whole attack on the park's security camera, so it shouldn't be hard to convict. Right now we're all just waiting for the contractor to wake up.
This is what I learned from the news article and video:
There was a fight.
Clod says it wasn't a fight.
So, we're left with this:
Something happened.
Someone please tell me what I'm missing.
You're missing the other 90% of the story. You're welcome.
So are we.;)
So...
Something happened.
Top-notch journalism.
What is this "journalism" you speak of, and what does it have to do with getting clicks and links for the station?
Clod's doing the bratty sister thing... Nyah nyah, I know something you don't know. :p:
It's my relative. Saying it was a "fight" indicates he's somehow partially at fault, which is not what went down. It was an unprovoked attack from an ex-employee who should not have been able to get onto the premises.
My relative is currently in an induced coma in the ICU with brain swelling from the severe head injury he suffered. At this point he is expected to be there for at least 7-14 more days, with no guarantee of what permanent damage may have been done until he wakes up and they can assess him.
I'm angry, and sad, and scared for my relative and his wife. I get that the park has to protect itself and not let guests think that they might be in danger from an employee, but it sucks that the PR-speak has to act like everyone's equally to blame.
The link calls it an "altercation" and an "incident", is the park saying something else?
The park's official line to news outlets was an "incident" caused a closure of a large section of the park for half a day, and that incident was a "fight" between "contractors" working inside the park. I imagine the author of that particular article took out his thesaurus and substituted "altercation."
Regardless, what actually happened was not a brawl, it was a disgruntled employee who flipped the fuck out, marched in and stabbed my cousin in the back of the head with a pair of scissors. He would have injured others had he not been restrained.
I realize now that I was needlessly cryptic, I just didn't want to post things I wasn't supposed to. But details have been posted in other places now, so I guess it doesn't matter.
Yeah, but we're family, Miss Grumpypants. :p:
I imagine both the reporter, and whoever was charged with the press release, didn't really know what happened and chose generic language. Both are in a position to get something out there fast. One to beat the competition with the earliest report even if it's incomplete, and the other to try and beat the rumor mill from spreading WW III or the Holocaust had started in the park.
I'm sorry Clodfobble. That's horrific. I hope he wakes up from the coma as the same person.
He'd better. Dude's going to want to know that some 500+ artists across the country have donated to his medical care, and that he made
national news.
500+ artists across the country have donated to his medical care
How?
They made a
GoFundMe page for him.
The difficult thing (well, one of the difficult things) is that his dad, my dad's brother, lives in Austin. He's the one I've mentioned before with Parkinson's, and he's started slipping into dementia over the last 6-9 months. He just needs a little supervision and has a roommate who keeps things running smoothly for him for now, but we had to stop giving him updates on Glenn because he kept forgetting about it and every time we told him something new it was like we were breaking the news all over to him again.
Thank you.
No, thank
you.
An artist he used to work with in Vegas when he was working at the MGM Grand. I don't know her personally, but his wife said she does.
God, what a horrible thing to happen. The artists' response is awesome.
$51,810, raised by 932 people in 6 days. Sounds like a lot of money, but considering they medical attention he needs, I can envision a hospital bill of at least three times that.
Oh absolutely, any amount of time in the ICU is going to top $100,000, and he's looking at a 2-week stay at least. On the other hand, you can be sure the park is going to pay for a good portion.
But I hadn't gotten around to mentioning... He is awake! Still on a respirator and heavily sedated, but responding to commands (wiggling toes and squeezing hands and whatnot.) They're starting some mild physical therapy to counteract lying in bed all day for so long, but he has to be in restraints because he keeps trying to pull out his ventilator tube. But brain swelling is completely gone, and he is awake!
Glad to hear that he's awake and responding.
Unrealistic expectations of what life is supposed to be about...I can't stop mourning for my mom. It's been two years, on December 29, and all I can think is that I did it all wrong , that I let her down. Somehow. Is this the punishment for not having your own children? Did I screw everything up? I miss her so much every day and I don't know how to keep going forward. I do, for her, but I wonder even why sometimes.
Thanks for listening.
I'm sorry I.M. I didn't know your mom, but I am sure she wouldn't have wanted you to feel like you let her down.
I'm sorry for your pain IM.
You're not here to impress anyone. Not even your mother. You're just here.
Bowie's death made me cry. Not for him but because 18 months is so short. Lemmy had even less time to fight. We need a better chance. We need more time to do everything. I want to believe there's more time than that.
I still don't want to talk about it. I just needed to say that
The lifestyle he led would likely make him seek medical help.
Who is Celestia N. Ward?
An artist he used to work with in Vegas when he was working at the MGM Grand. I don't know her personally, but his wife said she does.
She has a website that I found interesting. I was intrigued by the description of how she draws fat people without offending.
Quote:
Originally Posted by anonymous 
When you're really, really upset and you know no-one can help/definitely not the person in front of you, but someone bugs you to tell them anyway and eventually you think what do I have to lose? So you tell them and then they say back off like you have the plague
Shit - that sounds rough.
Shit - that sounds rough.
I like that quote, Grav!
I had a temporary handicapped parking tag while I was having chemo, and I needed it then. Couldn't walk more than about 50 ft without having to sit down and rest. And when the handicapped spots were filled by cars without tags, and those 20-somethings dashed into the store from their illegally-parked car full of vim and vigor, their choices meant that I couldn't hobble in and get my few groceries, because I couldn't walk across the whole parking lot. (Re Rkzenrage: I sat down A LOT in the grocery store - I knew where their benches/seats were and plotted my path from rest stop to rest stop.)
My tag expired in 2013, a few months after chemo, which was appropriate. I have no sympathy for those who abuse the system, but my lack of sympathy doesn't matter. Somehow, they always get away with it.
I'd have just parked them in, I've also pulled up and touched their bumper then shoved their car out of the way. The perks of having a shit box beater.
Unrealistic expectations of what life is supposed to be about...I can't stop mourning for my mom. It's been two years, on December 29, and all I can think is that I did it all wrong , that I let her down. Somehow. Is this the punishment for not having your own children? Did I screw everything up? I miss her so much every day and I don't know how to keep going forward. I do, for her, but I wonder even why sometimes.
Thanks for listening.
I'm sorry for your pain IM.
I am too.
Your finger? Not so much. ;)
My comment wasn't intended to be remotely dismissive. I meant that it sounded like a really difficult thing to deal with.
Oh absolutely, any amount of time in the ICU is going to top $100,000, and he's looking at a 2-week stay at least. On the other hand, you can be sure the park is going to pay for a good portion.
They have estimated 10 more days in ICU, then a long hospital stay followed by therapy, but he is walking a little.
I am taking my father back to Ontario next weekend, to live in a retirement residence. Not a totally bad situation, in fact it'll be far better than what he has now; but not what I'd promised or anticipated.
I brought him to live with me just over two years ago after he'd been alone for 4 years, and my thought was that he'd live out his life here. But since being fired and having to start a new business 40 miles away, and being away very long hours, it's not tenable for him to continue like this. He's too frail. He doesn't cook for himself. He has weak legs due to neuropathy, and he's prone to falls; if he falls while I'm away for 12 hours, he'll just lie there.
So he has to enter assisted living, because the home care people in our county are scary and not an option. We looked at assisted living nearby, but his Canadian income doesn't stretch to cover costs with the current exchange, and he's too proud to let us help (we have no income right now and for the foreseeable future). So it's back to Ontario.
This is one more indirect consequence of those shitheads who did what they did last October. I drive past that big new building that's on my way to and from everything, it's so close to my house - the building I helped design and should have been working in now - and I have a very hard time not ill-wishing the bunch of them.
We never know how things will go in life, and I couldn't keep this promise. But it is definitely hard. My father will be alone in his new residence and city. He'll be back in Ontario but will have no health insurance for 3 months, so heaven help him if something happens within that time frame. It's a little-known fact that Ontario is absolute in its rejection of people without OHIP; they will turn away patients from the ER. There is no EMTALA there, or any comparable legislation. I hope he'll be all right for 3 months, or I'll have to spirit him back across the border for compassionate medical care.
All of which is to say that this breaking up of family is one more thing I lay at the feet of this local shithead 'health system'. It's not anything that can be compensated. Just a loss.
- and I have a very hard time not ill-wishing the bunch of them.
There is no reason not to, fuck 'em, they deserve it.
Ortho,
check this out.
My comment wasn't intended to be remotely dismissive. I meant that it sounded like a really difficult thing to deal with.
Are you accusing me of being remotely dismissive? Obviously I am, because I am nowhere near close enough to be locally dismissive.
not usre if this is ref my comment, but if it is, I share your feelings. The second part was a private joke with IM and you shouldn't be eavesdropping
There is no reason not to, fuck 'em, they deserve it.
Ortho, check this out.
Thanks, Bruce.
I'm getting really grumpy again.
Everything is upsetting me, or irritating me, or offending me.
So if I don't show up for a while, it's self-censorship.
I really want to go and see Mum, but I can't.
I need answers regarding my health, my finances, my future plans, but they are a long time coming.
I want to move away from this place, but I can't.
And I want it to be warm again - so MUCH. Something I never thought I'd say.
Oh and I want a nice dinner too, because why not ask for everything while you're at it.
Sympathy isn't asked for or expected. Practical solutions even less. I see someone who can set things in motion for me tomorrow. Today I'm just down, but I'm trying to recognise the pattern. And the pattern says - do your moaning in private for now.
I feel ya! So many things are irritating me. I too want answers about my health (not in so dire straits as you but there are things I want to take care of/check out, and I can't) and I want my finances to make sense and I want a future that doesn't include dying of a heart attack in 3 years and good GAWD I want to move I hate where I am so much and it's falling apart piece by piece...and so am I.
And I want it to be warm again too. And damn what I would give for a nice steak dinner with a nice guy.
Right now I want a big fluffy teddy bear to cuddle and cry on. Preferably in a Johnny Depp shape.
Hang in there, Sundae. :) :hug:
I'm getting really grumpy again.
Everything is upsetting me, or irritating me, or offending me.
So if I don't show up for a while, it's self-censorship. Today I'm just down, but I'm trying to recognise the pattern. And the pattern says - do your moaning in private for now.
If it gets bad pm me.
A school friend, one of the best, who I reconnected with on Fookbace a few years ago is dying of cancer. Tonight. Tomorrow. Soon. Diagnosed at the end of October.
FUCK CANCER.
That is all.
Sent by thought transference
Sorry, Limey.:sniff:
Fuck cancer.
Fuck cancer, and fuck fookbase the bearer of bad news. :(
I'm so sorry limey. Jebus it ain't fair by any stretch of imagination. :(
Thanks everyone. I'm glad to have got to know her again, just sad that it was for a short while (no news yet, but that's not good ...)
I've had pain in my low back for several weeks; radiates to my left leg below the knee, which means spinal nerve impingement. Never had it before, no trauma to cause it. It could be due to degenerative processes, but coming on over a short period of time makes that less likely. Steroids have improved things somewhat today but otherwise it's crippling. I know I need to contact my onco but don't want to get bad news.
There's enough bad news with my practice that has no patients, and endless debt. People call and then don't show. We had a call today for 15 physicals next week but I'll believe it when they walk through the door. And pay. Getting paid in the US for WC is ridiculous - so many middle-man companies that take chunks out of insurance payments, and no choice about it. I sink deeper in debt every day. But if I have mets, I suppose it won't matter.
First, heard Mum's friends' son has died.
The couple where the husband has leukemia.
He (the son) was taken into hospital with acute pancreatitis and subsequently suffered a cardiac arrest and then brain damage from that.
Died yesterday afternoon surrounded by family, although it's not likely he'd have known that.
It was inevitable at that point. The damage was done. He was in general poor health physically, as well as being schizophrenic. His Mum described him as "a gentle giant".
He was only 6-8 years older than me from what I can work out. Hard to reckon when you knew someone when you were young. Those few years mean a lot in middle school, and nothing on a deathbed.
Made me cry.
And then today, my mobile phone was stolen from the library.
Properly stolen.
I can only assume I put it down when I talked to the librarian (I am so much more careful when I am in Leeds!) and walked off without it (careful, but absent-minded).
Checked a book back in, went to take a photo, couldn't find phone. Retraced my steps. Searched and re-searched my bags. Was then asked by another library user, "Did you get your phone back?" in a worried tone of voice.
Apparently, the man using the nearest computer had said he knew me, I'd just gone out for a cigarette, and he'd take it to me.
Lying, thieving scrote.
No phone, no landline, no internet access apart from the library.
The best my service provider can offer is that I ask for a duplicate SIM card and buy another phone.
Got a crime number, and there is CCTV/ user records in the library.
Am not holding my breath.
But that made me cry too.
I can't compare death to losing a mobile phone. But I don't think I've ever had anything deliberately stolen before. He had at TOP a five minute window of opportunity.
Arsehole.
I'm sorry Sundae. That's horrible that the thief took your phone.
It's an unfortunate fact of life that anything which isn't nailed down will disappear at the hands of some opportunist thief.
Despicable 'illegitimate'.
Oh no! Hon, that's awful bad luck. When it's your main link tothe world, that really sucks.
And, I was just about to text you my new mobile number (early birthday pressie from the two Js) so we could text again, finally, after a year and a half of me not having a mobile :(
I just can not abide a thief.
My buddy keeps getting shit taken from his house. He has a plan for the thief if he ever catches him in his house...
It involves dude's hands and a 32 oz claw-hammer.
Well at least my Mum is being sympathetic...
I wouldn’t expect anything else in a big city. You have got away with it being in Otley, but why must it leave your pocket? Do phones have to be right beside everyone all the time? It’s the same in pubs and McD’s. Phones on tables everywhere.
They are asking to be stolen.
I am so old that I do not understand it at all. I suppose because I do not feel it is “my life”, as younger people do, I always have mine in a pocket or bag, which is why I miss calls (which are not important in the first place in the grand scheme of life).
I wish the bloody things had never been invented. My Crime Desk job consisted of dozens of calls a day about stolen phones and made my life a misery so I see it from a different point of view. At least I did get CCTV checked in those sort of locations and made a lot of work for myself. I shouldn’t think city police would bother.
Oh well. she won't be bothered by any calls from me in the near future. Because they are not important.
Try and stay calm. I expect you will rant and rave at my email but it’s how I feel. Yours is not the only life that is shit.
Yes I know.
That's why I vented on here and didn't try to hurt you, mother.
Heh. The last line is always the killer.
Geez Sundae. I get it. It's like, you (and I) are just going along trying so very hard to hold it all together and some dumbass thinks that it's a good time to throw some more wrenches (spanners) in the works.
Like grav said, I also cannot abide thieves.
But that's not only it, is it? It's those who want you to feel badly. They're everywhere. And we're supposed to ignore them, and be OK anyway. How?
Why can't things not suck for, like, five minutes?
I'm sorry about your phone. It's crappy that some loser stole it.
Have you ever discussed your mother's narcissism vis-a-vis your own mental health situation with your therapists, Sundae? Because borderline is one of those things that is highly dependent on the environment in which you were raised. I know you probably know this, but still, it bears repeating. She's not healthy for you, in a number of ways.
Oops. My post was supposed to go in the Upset thread, as an addendum to the one regarding having my phone stolen.
Please can a Mod move or delete it? It's completely in the wrong place here, and far too public.
My vision. still bothering me. supposed to be used to it by now. fuckshitbollocks that is all.
ikr. If only whinging was a cure. ;) oh well. can still function. back to the laundry. Boys are all away at hockey, I'm procrastinating housework
We really ought to have a FUCK CANCER thread. Another friend of mine, musician and all round good bloke, has been diagnosed with cancer and given a few months to live. He lives abroad so I text him what is most likely a farewell message. Because you don't know how quickly they're gonna be taken.
F U C K C A N C E R
Yeah. Cancer pretty much blows.
Sorry about your friend, Limes.
Fuck cancer.
We're living too long, if we all died at 27 like real rock stars, there would be a lot less cancer. Fuck cancer from both ends. :mad:
Fuck cancer.
Also fuck dementia.
Sorry Limey.
I just found out its come back to fuck with my Godfather - the sweetest man on earth. Fuck you cancer, you fucking fuck!
Just found out that either,
a) my health insurance was cancelled because I did not re-enroll during the open enrollment period, or
b) my health insurance automatically renewed and I'm all good, or
c) my health insurance was cancelled AND I am not eligible to buy a plan because open enrollment ended, or
d) The New York State of Health website is one of the, if not THE worst, most poorly designed, piece of shit websites.
e) if you told me some politician's nephew or girlfriend wanted to start a web design business and got the job through nepotism I wouldn't be surprised.
For starters there is no way to log in to your account from the home page, nor is there any indication of what link to click to get to a log in page. What you have to do to log into an existing account is click on the link to begin the application process. Of course, why didn't I think of that? You know, just like how every other website in the world has a link to REGISTER but not a link to LOG IN, because why have a LOG IN for existing users?
Now it's more bullshit that I have to deal with on Monday or maybe not or maybe I won't have insurance until next year.
You won't have to wait until next year, open enrollment is when you can change plans or change your coverage. This guarantees the insurance company they've got you for a whole year, and the government that you don't have to pay a penalty for non-coverage, They were trying to prevent the car insurance scam of buying a month of insurance to renew your plates then driving without for eleven months. Worst case, a fine for missing the window.
Caution: That's the way I understand it but I'm not an authority, nor play one on TV... only the internet. ;)
I'm with monster. It automatically renews ... sometimes even when you cancel.
I switched jobs starting in Nov of last year and got a plan through the exchange for the last two months of 2015. I canceled it on 12/31/15 as another plan was much cheapre (relatively speaking) with a different carrier.
So I canceled the one and started the other which I've been paying for. I got a letter about 2 weeks ago that my plan with company A which I canceled, will terminate on 4/30 and oh by the way, you owe us $1800+ in back premiums.
We are still discussing the definition of "terminated"
yay I knew something about insurance! I R all growed up now I had to get my own. which is costing us a fucking bomb. #grrrrr (so I guess that's what's upsetting me. Beest's chemo wiped through our family deductable in the first couple of weeks of the year so everything is free for all.... except that his company dictates that when spouse can get insurance through own job, they must. so I have my own stinking huge deductible. And torn cartilage in my shoulder.
His company doesn't give you the option of paying your portion of his insurance? I've worked for two companies that did that, and group plans cover much more than individual plans. Or is this a group plan through your company?
Not anymore Bruce. They are all trying their damnedest to get everyone onto their ow plan with a nice big fat deductible.
So I spoke with NYS of Health today about my coverage and I spoke with a young woman who had, for want of a better description, an 'inner city' accent which was a combination of soft spoken, a-tonal, and a continuous slur of sounds that vaguely resembled syllables.
Her voice was like the aural equivalent of when someone used a xerox machine to make a copy of a copy and then that was copied and so on until the result was a blurry simulacrum of text.
Her speech was very impressionistic. I found myself sort of lazily following her sounds until she'd ask, "Do you agree?" and then I'd have to ask her to repeat herself. I have had a far easier time understanding Bharati Mukherjee from Dogsbody Customer Service than her. Nonetheless, she was nice and sweet and if I'm not mistaken we were able to renew my coverage based on my best estimation of my earnings so far this year, considering I haven't gotten any 1099s or W2s yet for 2016.
I think I might have caught about 35% of what she said, so I believe I also elected to auto renew for the next five years.*
*Unless anything at all changes in my life, in which case I must tell them and re-apply and re-apply to auto renew.
Glad I did because as the letter clearly stated: "As of 4/30/2016 your insurance coverage was cancelled." Bold mine. I guess they underestimated how quickly the post office would deliver that letter.
The letter says was because they had determined you hadn't jumped through the hoops so you was cancelled. :haha:
I axed the computer an it say nu-huh.
what?
Mum's friend who has leukemia?
He goes into the hospice today. The cancer has reached his brain.
I had hoped I'd at least be able to see him him when I finished my residential stay.
Fuck cancer.
Bloodyhell, that's rough. Sorry Sundae :(
God that's awful Sundae. My thoughts are with you and your mum.
Mum's friend who has leukemia?
He goes into the hospice today. The cancer has reached his brain.
I had hoped I'd at least be able to see him him when I finished my residential stay.
Fuck cancer.
Probably not much consolation, but he probably prefers that your last memory of him is from a little earlier
That's why I don't go to the coffin at a funeral. I don't want my last memory of someone to be them dead-in-a-box.
:headshake
I was just tipped off by my agent that the book is not selling as well as they had hoped, so far. :( Reviews are universally stellar, interviews are happening on a steady basis, but it doesn't seem to be translating into actual sales. And the way these things go, the less initial sales there are, the less effort they put into more sales down the road.
I don't want anyone to become a shill, and it's super hard even typing this here because I'm very anti-self-promotion, but... if you enjoyed it, and if you know someone else who might enjoy it, it would be really cool if you could tell them about it. Por favor.
Beyoncé's concert at the baseball stadium is generating extra heavy traffic, and the ferry dock is just a couple blocks away. I have no other route options.
Cancer? Torn cartilage? Pfft.
Just. Kidding. Really, just kidding. .
I'm glad I have my problems and none of y'all's.
Thought I did learn that a SHOT of cortisone made my shoulder all better, but only after a couple MRIs. The pain was so omnipresent that I was unable to sleep normally. Just in short periods. Shift, and wince and yelp and wake up, and wake TWIL too. Sux. Cortisone is teh bomb.
Popdigr has been having a shoulder problem for going on a couple years now.
The doc has him on Pennsaid. Popdigr says it's a miracle drug. At $1400 per 3.8 oz of cream, it should be a miracle drug.
Bloody hell. The pennsaid solution (I think under the name diclofenac) is available here at £20 per 60ml. Applied as drops and rubbed into the skin - don't know if the cream is available.
I dunno how this works but it's
$40 at Walmart??
eta: or "
pay as little as $0"?
The walmart stuff is 1.5% solution, I wonder what the cream is?
What Popdigr uses is diclofenac sodium topical solution, 2% w/w (whatever "w/w" means. He has talked to the Walmart pharmacist, and they either didn't carry it, period, or they didn't have the generic, or the brand name or something.
Thanks guys, I'll pass all this along to Popdigr.
I should probably add that Popdigr's doc has been giving him this stuff as samples. He said "When ya run out, just come back for another sample."
Ugh. I never want to attend another conference in my life.
It's exactly like I thought it would be. Just crowds and crowds of self-promoters, everyone having big-smile conversations to promote their thing, and not realizing that the people they're talking to don't give a damn and are just waiting for their turn to promote their thing.
One of the women on the panel I was on was an "energy practitioner" who had "healed" her daughter in three years after her "regression"--which covered ages 12 to 15. Basically the kid went through puberty and she was desperate to take credit for it. An audience member asked about tips for cooking in bulk, and this woman's mic-grabbing answer was "bring your child to my 'clinic' so I can help him achieve energy balance." Bitch, what? Stay on topic!
I find myself mentioning again and again that my kids were diagnosed by actual professionals at ages 2.5 and 15 months, respectively, because I'm sorry but if your kid wasn't diagnosed until 11 his problems aren't that damn big, and you are the reason everyone thinks this diagnosis is no big deal.
So okay, the vendors suck, but I thought at least I'd get to sneak into some good presentations when I wasn't at the table--except this year they've separated out 90% of the medical talks into CME-only presentations (i.e., you have to be a physician to get in,) and the talks the doctors are giving to the general public are super-generic overview stuff, none of the detailed stuff you have to have taken chemistry to understand. Which makes sense, because half the people here are absolute idiots, like the audience member who highjacked 20 minutes of our presentation to "ask a question" that wasn't a question at all, it was an entire developmental history of her suicidal, daily-vomiting teen who had been institutionalized several times with significant mental health issues (none of which were autism,) and she tried to play us a video on her phone into the microphone so we could hear her daughter begging to die, except it wouldn't load, and she was crying, and finally she let the panelists respond, the unanimous advice we gave being "go see a damn therapist yourself, woman, you are obviously fucked in the head."
Oh, but at least I've sold books! Well, I sold 6, which is all I have. The rest of the boxes are missing. FedEx has a signature for their delivery, the warehouse swears they were then delivered here to the conference building, and after that... no one knows. If the boxes are not found tomorrow, I am not only unable to sell them, I am out $400ish since I won't have anything to send back to the publisher.
But hey, I've given away lots of promotional bookmarks! And now I've been invited to dinner with more self-promoters who want to pretend we're friends so I'll take their bookmarks. Guh. Never, ever again.
Kind of sounds like when you were first starting on this journey, where everyone had THE answer before they knew what the question was. Pity the people who are dazed and confused by the hucksters and promoters. How do they know where the truth will come from, or how to recognize it when the hear it? :(
Wow. I hate conferences too but it's because I'm an introvert.
It's okay. Turns out I was mostly just hangry.
I've had dinner now, my companions were nice and only very minimally promotional, and now that everything's closed up for the night one of the conference organizers is going to let me into the secret warehouse-delivery room that only conference organizers get to go in. They have sworn up and down my boxes are not in there, but have yet to let me inside to check for myself, and this guy has decided I'm trustworthy enough. So with any luck my boxes will be in there after all. (Right where they were supposed to be the whole time, but that's a different rant.)
Deep breaths and fingers crossed and maybe some booze from the hotel bar afterwards.
Turns out I was mostly just hangry.
I don't know why, but, that struck me as very funny.
Go have have a Snickers.
Been to a couple TBI conferences that were similar. avoid them - make yourself an official looking badge, wear it and go into the CME's - no one "really cares" who attends which event. Mumble mumble Dr. Clod here ... TBI, DAI & BFT mumble mumble...
Anon, the CME criteria are to keep out those just hawking their wares. You too found those people to be intolerably irritating (to borrow a phrase). The medical community; however, always has exceptions to policy for those who warrant them. You just need a sponsor, a physician who will send you as their representative since they don't have time to attend every conference of interest.
Consider asking your children's doctor to sponsor your attendance at no cost to their practice. Do it formally, in writing, assuring him/her that you'd audit the CME presentations for updates relevant to the doctor's practice, examples of developments you can direct other parents to physicians for during the course of your book interviews, and information that may put your experiences into more broadly appealing context to promote"awareness" (thanks, UT) in possible future revisions of your book.
NOTE: ALWAYS keep such requests in the context of advancing the mission, in this case dissemination of information for medical professionals, not about you and your personal interests except as an aside. END NOTE.
Assure your potential sponsor that you won't use the CME conference as a sales platform, soapbox for your opinions; or, critiquing other's work.
Assure your potential sponsor that you will do all the leg work insofar as the attendee application and registration fee so all the doctor's practice has to do is sign it, fax it; or, click on submit.
If it's your children's doctor, it wouldn't hurt to give the doc a complimentary copy of your book, with a personal inscription of appreciation, well in advance of any request for sponsorship to establish yourself as a public interface on the subject; but, not have it seen as a bribe.
I've been granted multiple exceptions to policy, including from the American College of Surgeons to attend Advanced Trauma Life Support (ATLS) which is used to qualify physicians (prerequisite) to work in emergency rooms. I didn't just audit it, I tested and passed to physician standards. The exception to policy was granted to those like me (military spec. ops.) because we'd be doing trauma management in places where physicians couldn't go. The key to obtaining such exceptions is to present yourself as a generic physician extender (not to be confused with a PA) in areas where physicians can use a bridge (in your case public awareness) to their advantage. It does require persistence and decorum.
Good luck.
Excellent advice, sexo!
Sent by thought transference
That's why he's so successful at stirring shit, he knows what he's talking about. :haha:
Attempted kidnapping at the end of my street. Not a custody situation, a "Two men luring 10-year-old girls into their van" situation. The girls were smart enough to run away, thank God. No fucking way my kids would have.
Nope. They know it was a silver van, and they've jacked up police presence in the neighborhood, so I'm sure the fuckers will move on to prowling a different subdivision. This isn't even the first instance since we've lived here--a guy (different? same? who knows) tried to get a kid into a car with him about 4-5 years ago, right outside the school. I don't know if it's because it's a nice neighborhood where the kids are outside a fair amount, or because everyone's close enough that word spreads quickly among the neighbors, but Jesus. It's not a fun time to be a registered sex offender living within a 10-mile radius of this place right now, that's for sure. I bet every one of them is getting checked in on every day.
That's terrifying to think about.
I may post more about this later...but, just want to say something.
Mu brother's family dog (all of us family especially my dad) had to be put to sleep today. We all spent the afternoon with him yesterday. We are all devastated. And not just us, the extensive community of brother and sister in law and nieces' friends all loved him too.
He was a big sweet smart golden retriever. He was a therapy dog and would go to nursing homes and there would be a circle of wheelchairs around him. He just wanted to love and be loved.
Im so sad about so many things. RIP Jack, you were the dog of dogs...the best ever.
I'm so sorry Infi. But glad for you that you had him in your life for the time that you did.
Man, that is the suck.
It's hell losing a pet.
It's so hard to make that decision. He sounds like a wonderful pet who was able to share his gift of love where it was needed. X
sent by thought transference
Sorry Im
Very sad, I am really am sorry for you.
Ugghh... Sorry Infi. I still remember losing my Golden. He was awesome too. They really are a special breed.
Thanks all.
Over the course of the years I've lost pets, other members of my family have lost pets. And it's always so very sad. You know going in that you will have to face it someday, but still...
But Jack, I gotta tell you about him. He was the dog of my brother and sis-in-law and their three girls. But he was all our dog. More than any other dog-relation he was at our family events. It would have been unheard of if he didn't come to Christmas when my mom was still here and we spent the day at their house. He was there with us every Sunday for dinner. Recently, my dad would go pick him up from my brother's house just to take him to the land he owns with the lakes, so Jack could swim. He loved to swim. Just jumped right into the deep parts and paddled around, happy as could be. I am trying to get ahold of a copy of a picture my brother took of him coming out of the water with a big stick in his mouth. It's a really good picture.
Every year at Halloween my brother has a big barn party. It's the party of the year. THeir friends, parents of friends, kids of friends...it really is a big community. I always got a kick out of Jack greeting the guests. They'd all be "hey Jack, how ya doin'" and he would say hi in his doggie way and then greet the next guests. You'd see him throughout the night just hanging out with people. He was part of it all.
Never had to leash him. He knew where he was allowed to go and where he wasn't. You could leave him outside and not worry for a second that he would wander off into danger.
I can't say enough about how much he was loved, and how much he deserved it. I feel so badly for everyone. My nieces are ages 11-16, and he was 10 years old, so they basically grew up with him.
I thank you all for understanding how hard it is to lose a pet like that.
Beest's GP/family doctor -now also a co-swim/polo parent and friend, is suddenly undergoing major brain surgery for a large mass that looks like cancer. To a certain extent I'm kind of numb to such horrible news having received so much of it recently and needing to carry on -which is upsetting in itself- but in reality, it's just taking a long time to sink in. And now it is doing, I'm pretty upset :(
That is crapulent.
And in other shitty news, I went over to my hunting mentor's house with the powder horn to find out he was on his way to get a pacemaker installed in preparation for heart surgery two or three days later.
I have to check on him and see how things went.
Sorry to hear about shit piled on top of shit, monster. :(
fucking hell.
gah.
speechless.
fucking hell.
gah.
speechless.
What happened V?
I think maybe he's referring to Monster's news. Or Feet's. Or both. Maybe.
:/ still fucking waiting on news of today's procedure... (cut off supply to mass in prep for tomorrow's zillion hour removal....) I kinda figure no news is good news.... that's my public stance.... but really I feel that only applies to life vs death...... IMO the order you hear news is dead, perfect, minor comps, major comps.... So I hope/guess she made it, but there was a stroke risk among others with today's procedure ..... :( wibble
I'm sorry monster. I hope it will be good news.
I'm hoping now it's just late enough that everyone went to sleep relieved and didn't realize that no-one else had notified the world of the status quo.
.....thanks for listening :)
Y'know how ya use a can of tomatoes, and sometimes ya drain the juice from them, before using them?
I just tried to drain a can of tomato juice.
I'm such an idjit sometimes.:facepalm:
Him got all et up by the dain bramage
Went on a trip to Leeds yesterday. A day out and had a couple of things to do.
One of my burns was looking... sore. So I went to Minor Injuries. Now when I went to Minor Injuries in Otley there were no questions about why, just how and when. This Nurse was much more nosy.
Got transferred to A&E (Accident and Emergency)
Junior Doctor - I think it's the season for them.
Nope, not happy.
Got her boss in. Nope, not happy.
So after swearing I would never go back to hospital again, I had FIVE hours in A&E. And today am going to Wakefield to a burns specialist because I may have an infection (I don't)
I went to see if the G-D burns plaster I bought was the right one.
Now I'm waiting for hospital transport.
Should've just done a Bruce and tried to cut it off...
They'd better flipping well feed me while I'm there!
Waiting in hospitals is the worst. It's like time has no meaning once you walk through those doors. Sorry Sundae.
Went on a trip to Leeds yesterday.
some relevant humor to cheer you up
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uokDKSDz4Ow&t=1m35s
[YOUTUBE]uokDKSDz4Ow[/YOUTUBE]
That was a the most sedate ribaldry I've ever seen.
What Gravs said more or less. Obviously he could hear it.
tarheel
some days it's really hard to love anything or anyone. I just want it all to stop. Not life, just the constant beating down
Perhaps you just need to be beat up.
Oh, wait a minute. I think I got a couple of words in the wrong order.
Perhaps you just need to be up beat.
There, that's better.
When the world gives you the cold shoulder, think warm thoughts.
Sorry anon. We're in your corner, honest.
We are always here for you.
I hear ya anon... feeling that way lately myself.
Can't seem to catch a break sideways.
Three weeks ago the car battery died. OK, it was seven years old. Then it was metal on metal with one of the rear brakes. I'll get to it, in the meantime let it make noise, I need new rotors anyway. On the way to getting brake parts I have a blowout. Sidewall. Fucking whatever. I'll put my all seasons on the back and the snows on the front. I'm at the tire place and the guy comes out, "I need to show you something."
"Yeah, I know, the brakes are toast."
"Well, that's true but this is worse than the brakes."
One of the bolts holding the upper rear control arm snapped. The control arm is pretty fucking rusty too. Fuck me running.
I drive the fucker home and start taking the thing apart. After a ton of PB Blaster and a lot of torch and a long cheater, I manage to get the good bolt loose. I can't even fit a ratchet in there, so it's 27,000 quarter turns of the wrench to pull out almost 2 inches of threaded bolt. I get the control arm off and see the other bolt is sheared right at the surface of the bracket it bolts onto. Can't get a drill in there, or a punch, or anything. The only way to get at it is to replace the bracket which is also the strut/shock absorber assembly which is also frozen on and torching PB Blasting hasn't helped. Also my 1/2" ratchet handle is missing so I'm trying to get those bolts off with a 3/8" ratchet and it's twisting the extension. I'm putting it aside for today. I found a new used shock strut assembly on ebay for 25 bucks and ordered it. The control arm and all the bushings and so on I can get locally.
What a PITA.
Sometimes you just have to slog through. I'm sorry man.
I think you need to show that car your boomstick.:shotgun:
And today am going to Wakefield to a burns specialist because I may have an infection (I don't)
!
Yeah...I saw the pic you sent. I wouldn't be confident that it wasn't infected.
Sitting in front of the TV watching election returns making myself sick.
If it is of any consolation, a Trump will be easier to impeach than a Clinton. Depending on what your definition of is, is, of course.
Trump must be protected at all cost, Pence is the real theocratic enemy here.
If it is of any consolation, a Trump will be easier to impeach than a Clinton. Depending on what your definition of is, is, of course.
Not for the next two years.
Hilary won the popular vote by almost 200,000, but Gary Johnson voters allowed the swing in electoral votes for Trump and in key senate races.
It was the dirty old man vote that put Trump on top. The dirty old men voted for the candidate with the best looking daughter: Hillary didn't stand a chance.
Johnson voters were NEVER gonna vote for her. Pinning this on him is simply wrong. There are many who would NEVER vote for her - no matter what. Many/most of those votes would have gone to Trump if he wasn't there. She was the problem, not him.
Life is tough right now, the blows and the obstacles keep on coming and I'm miserable
While I'm certain your situation hasn't changed overnight, hopefully as the sun rises this morning, so do your spirits. I'm sorry you have to deal with all this shit.
Life is tough right now, the blows and the obstacles keep on coming and I'm miserable
Sorry monster. That sucks.
That sucks, even for a tough broad like you repeated blows get old real fast. I'm hoping you get a break in the action for some respite. :(
Sorry, monster. Feel free to vent as needed.
Sorry for the suck fest, M-girl.
There are many who would NEVER vote for her - no matter what.
Apparently, close to 75% of eligible voters...
Yep. The Dems figured out how to parlay a reasonably popular Presidency into a loss of all three branches of government. That took planning.
I just made a sausage casserole.
I thought the can said 'diced tomatoes with onion'...
...it actually said 'chili-ready diced tomatoes with onion'.
They have chili powder added to them.
Smelled it as soon as I opened the oven.
Fuck.
I just made a sausage chilli.
Heh, thanx for fixing that.
It wasn't nearly as bad as I was expecting. I wouldn't do it intentionally, but, it was still pretty good.
just taking a damn break
tuneup on the car today, I'll send pictures of the second plug removal ordeal. oil out and in, new filter on no parts left over yet. but stuck at the plugs/wires/cap routine. the ones that came out were the four electrode variety, the ones I have are old school one electrode kind. I can't find any of the three or four spark club gap measuring tools I own.... fuck. I'm just gonna put them in straight out of the box. they come with a little cardboard protector, so they've never been jostled against the electrode.
I'm ... man. taking them out was scary. very very tight very screechy thought for sure I was just wrecking it.... apparently not. air cleaner in, remains of melted grill in front of mass air sensor broken away and removed. not gonna do the fuel filter today. maybe tomorrow. also not gonna do the power steering rigid hose replacement I have, nor the gearshift selector doodad. I have a few inches of play in the stickshift, and the piece of the linkage that moves some fork around is very worn, I have the new one, but not on this trip.
I miss my jackstands and my floor jack. made good use of some used ramps, but driving up them is a test of my faith. my car's low enough that the lower part of the plastic bodywork fouls on the ramp while the front edge of the ramp is still several inches from the tire. I just rammed the ramps toward the tires, got in the car and tried to gently drive up. nope. too wet. spinning on the steel... not good. so now my only option is to run up them. but only up them and GOD FORBID NOT OVER THEM. I put a board in front of the car where I imagined I'd wind up when in the little wells for the tires. It worked the thirtieth time, give or take. Lots of room down there, that was nice.
I also miss my creeper. laying on the oilstain, ugh. anyhow, I'm mostly thawed, gonna get back to those plugs.
Some wood on the ground before the ramps will lift the front fascia enough to clear.
For laying under the car it's hard to beat cardboard.
I put a piece of 2" blue foamboard on top of my cardboard in the cold weather.
just taking a damn break
tuneup on the car today, I'll send pictures of the second plug removal ordeal. oil out and in, new filter on no parts left over yet. but stuck at the plugs/wires/cap routine. the ones that came out were the four electrode variety, the ones I have are old school one electrode kind. I can't find any of the three or four spark club gap measuring tools I own.... fuck. I'm just gonna put them in straight out of the box. they come with a little cardboard protector, so they've never been jostled against the electrode.
I'm ... man. taking them out was scary. very very tight very screechy thought for sure I was just wrecking it.... apparently not. air cleaner in, remains of melted grill in front of mass air sensor broken away and removed. not gonna do the fuel filter today. maybe tomorrow. also not gonna do the power steering rigid hose replacement I have, nor the gearshift selector doodad. I have a few inches of play in the stickshift, and the piece of the linkage that moves some fork around is very worn, I have the new one, but not on this trip.
I miss my jackstands and my floor jack. made good use of some used ramps, but driving up them is a test of my faith. my car's low enough that the lower part of the plastic bodywork fouls on the ramp while the front edge of the ramp is still several inches from the tire. I just rammed the ramps toward the tires, got in the car and tried to gently drive up. nope. too wet. spinning on the steel... not good. so now my only option is to run up them. but only up them and GOD FORBID NOT OVER THEM. I put a board in front of the car where I imagined I'd wind up when in the little wells for the tires. It worked the thirtieth time, give or take. Lots of room down there, that was nice.
I also miss my creeper. laying on the oilstain, ugh. anyhow, I'm mostly thawed, gonna get back to those plugs.
You're DIY enough to buy a set of casters and attach them to a couple of sheets of 3/4" plywood, it'd be well skookum. Then staple gun an ensolite camping pad to it and Bob's your uncle..
People...you're all pissing me off today.
Nah...not exactly. I'm a political animal...it's part of my job description now. But I'm tired of the hashing and re-hashing and conspiracy theories. There's more to life than politics. Like smoking crack...or sleeping...or other cool things.
Also, I'm tired of people lecturing. I think people mean well...I know I try to give people knowledge and let them follow their own adventure. But sometimes...Goddamn, we are so full of ourselves...and shit, too.
A 60 year old friend, lost his 38 year old daughter to a stroke. :mecry:
I'm sorry, Bruce.
Last night, someone I went to high school with passed. I was not friends with her during HS...we just went in different circles. I last saw her in 2010, when my fellow classmates held a fundraiser for her. She was fighting one of the most insidious forms of cancer--pancreatic. She had a great attitude and kicked that cancer's ass. Unfortunately, it decided it wasn't done with her.
I can say with no hesitation that Sanela is one of the toughest people I have ever met. She is leaving a wonderful family and many friends behind...rest in peace...
Fuck. Cancer.
Bruce, how awful for your friend. No parent should ever have to attend the funeral of their own child.
Syc - I agree. Fuck. Cancer.
Damn... A HS classmate of mine lost her husband last week - another classmate of ours. :'(
Went to the dentist yesterday, as the nasty antibiotics have failed. Today I get to go to a consult and will probably have to schedule surgical extraction, because the remaining pocket of infection from the double in-the-bone abscesses I woke up to on Black Friday (the day before my birthday!) is hiding under a root canal post. It's gotta get pulled.
Also, I am awaiting the usual 'how'd we do' survey from my Black Friday emergency room visit at the local hospital. There are a couple of things p*ssing me off about that:
1. If you are an osteopath, or any other type of medical provider that BY DEFINITION does not believe in the use of prescription drugs (I looked this **** up), you should NOT be the only doc on duty in the only ER in the county on a major holiday weekend.
2. I know you MUST have an in-state medical license to practice in this state, and this has been confirmed by more than one other medical practitioner since then. That being the case, I'm a little perturbed that the state's database of all licensed professionals--plumbers, accountants, physicians, therapists of all kinds, EVERYTHING--has never heard of this doctor. All online info about him lists him as having an OREGON license, and they aren't reciprocal!
3. For the love of whatever you hold holy, when someone comes dragging in literally crying from the double hotspots of burning, throbbing, stabbing pain in their mouth, DO NOT (SEVERELY UNLADYLIKE WORDS HERE) FREAK OUT AT THEM when they ask for help with pain and specifically state that their normal pain meds aren't touching this issue. Seriously, he yelled at me! Said he wasn't going to touch anything dental and would lose his license if he gave me pain meds. I started crying, my neighbor (who does the driving) started begging on my behalf instead of straight-up punching this idiot, and eventually said idiot declared he'd call my MD but I wasn't to expect any help with pain. Then he never came back to the exam room, instead sending the nurse with a 'scrip. No antibiotics, just a total of 6 pills of a pain med almost exactly the same as the one I already take--guess my doctor told him I'm not to be treated like a drug-seeking addict! I had to wait for Monday to get an antibiotic prescribed by my dentist, and since I have a pain contract with my MD I called his office that Monday morning to schedule the required followup to any ER visit. By the time I saw him Friday morning, the antibiotic prescribed by the dentist (Cephalexin) had failed. MD put me on Clindamycin, which I finished as instructed, and which is the one that has now failed.
So today I get checked out for an UGLY surgical extraction. Tomorrow I'm supposed to do physical therapy, which I won't know if I have to cancel until probably almost too late to call the PT office--if the extraction can be done today, they definitely won't want me jacking my pulse rate with 15 minutes of walking at 3 mph in chin-deep water! Odds are, because there's a root canal post that'll have to come out, they're going to have to schedule me for a full-on knock-my-butt-out surgery...otherwise I'd have to skip my breakfast and 2 doses of most of my meds because today's appointment isn't until 4 PM!!! Then I think Friday I see my MD again...he's gonna be surprised.
I really (unladylike word) HATE having bad teeth. And it's not all about dental hygiene. My mom has GREAT oral care habits and exactly 0 remaining intact original teeth. I'm glad I didn't get her vision in the bargain too! By my age she was on her like 3rd trifocal 'scrip, where I just got my first pair of bifocals last year.
I don't know how you keep it all straight.
I hope today's appointment goes well (I don't even know what "well" would mean.) and you can get this infection taken care of quickly.
Well, I think we can start with appropriate pain medication.
Booze is a great pain medication and antimicrobial all in one. Nature's gifts are the finest.
Just cancel PT, I can see the future.
Otherwise, I'm sorry about ur teefs.
If it was me I'd be seriously considering the old Vermont dental solution; pull 'em all and full dentures. I knew a number of teens and early 20s who'd had that done. More because of economic hardship than bad teeth.
I think it was someone here, wasn't it, who had the story about the dentist who wouldn't pull the last couple of leftover teeth, so the person went home, ripped them out with pliers, then came back to the dentist and said, "NOW give me dentures, dammit." Or was that a story from one of my dad's crazy friends?
I'll go with DAD'S CRAZY FRIENDS for $500
Well, here's how the dental thing went.
"If you want sedation it'll be about 7 weeks before we have an appointment open."
"Go ahead and use the Valium you have with, I'm sure it'll be okay." So I did. It wasn't enough. Had a HUGE panic attack. They did NOT wait for it to be over before starting.
"Oh, you're fine. We'll just numb you up and it'll all be over." (4 HUGE painful shots, 2 into the gums; I nearly broke my neighbor's hand squeezing on it. And he has big hands, where I wore a size 4.5 wedding band last I was married.)
"Your pain contract says you can be prescribed incidental pain relief by other doctors so long as you don't double up with your regular meds AND you notify your MD for a follow-up? That's not how pain contracts are written. I call bullshit." (Last line is a VERBATIM QUOTE from the fucking SURGEON.) So NO PAIN MEDS AT ALL.
"Our injectable anesthetic is great--you won't feel your face until morning." It wore off 20 minutes after the extraction, 40 minutes from home where all the pain meds were. It was a great ride home on icy roads!
Plan #1: No choice about cancelling my pool time for today, as the aftercare clearly states it will be Monday before I'm allowed to elevate my heart rate again.
Plan #2: I'm calling my doc's office in half an hour when they open to ask what it will take to get a copy of my pain contract. I believe the surgeon is wrong about how it's written, and if he is I'm taking a picture of the relevant passages and emailing it to their office!
Plan #3: An hour after that when my dentist's office opens I'm calling them and telling them to NEVER refer me to that surgeon again. He cannot POSSIBLY be the only one in a college town of over 100K who takes fucking Medicaid.
Plan #4: I already HAVE an appointment with my MD tomorrow, at which I will detail out how the surgeon assured me with 100% confidence that no harm could come of doubling up on the regular pain meds I can only have 30 of a month--not according to my MD, according to my insurance!
footfootfoot: Dentures are not an option. I have the kind of TMJ that continuously changes the shape of my lower jaw, so even my 3-year-old partial no longer sits right or allows my mouth to close completely. Medicaid will pay for one set of dentures every TEN YEARS. And as long as the remaining 8 teeth on my lower jaw are "reasonably" healthy, my insurance will NOT pay to have them extracted. 2 are crowns that would require surgical extraction as well.
Well, here's how the dental thing went.
"If you want sedation it'll be about 7 weeks before we have an appointment open."
"Go ahead and use the Valium you have with, I'm sure it'll be okay." So I did. It wasn't enough. Had a HUGE panic attack. They did NOT wait for it to be over before starting.
"Oh, you're fine. We'll just numb you up and it'll all be over." (4 HUGE painful shots, 2 into the gums; I nearly broke my neighbor's hand squeezing on it. And he has big hands, where I wore a size 4.5 wedding band last I was married.)
"Your pain contract says you can be prescribed incidental pain relief by other doctors so long as you don't double up with your regular meds AND you notify your MD for a follow-up? That's not how pain contracts are written. I call bullshit." (Last line is a VERBATIM QUOTE from the fucking SURGEON.) So NO PAIN MEDS AT ALL.
"Our injectable anesthetic is great--you won't feel your face until morning." It wore off 20 minutes after the extraction, 40 minutes from home where all the pain meds were. It was a great ride home on icy roads!
Plan #1: No choice about cancelling my pool time for today, as the aftercare clearly states it will be Monday before I'm allowed to elevate my heart rate again.
Plan #2: I'm calling my doc's office in half an hour when they open to ask what it will take to get a copy of my pain contract. I believe the surgeon is wrong about how it's written, and if he is I'm taking a picture of the relevant passages and emailing it to their office!
Plan #3: An hour after that when my dentist's office opens I'm calling them and telling them to NEVER refer me to that surgeon again. He cannot POSSIBLY be the only one in a college town of over 100K who takes fucking Medicaid.
Plan #4: I already HAVE an appointment with my MD tomorrow, at which I will detail out how the surgeon assured me with 100% confidence that no harm could come of doubling up on the regular pain meds I can only have 30 of a month--not according to my MD, according to my insurance!
footfootfoot: Dentures are not an option. I have the kind of TMJ that continuously changes the shape of my lower jaw, so even my 3-year-old partial no longer sits right or allows my mouth to close completely. Medicaid will pay for one set of dentures every TEN YEARS. And as long as the remaining 8 teeth on my lower jaw are "reasonably" healthy, my insurance will NOT pay to have them extracted. 2 are crowns that would require surgical extraction as well.
Wow, that whole ordeal sounds abusive. What is a pain contract? I've never heard of one. The surgeon sounds like a prick who wasn't listening to you or your needs. I'm sorry you had such a shitty experience.
I can only imagine what medicaid will be like after Trump takes office.
What is a pain contract? I've never heard of one.
What Feet said.
ETA: Here is an example of a pain contract/pain treatment agreement:
[ATTACH]58845[/ATTACH]
[ATTACH]58846[/ATTACH]
From
here.
About that font: All those Ls are Ts. Except for the ones that are Ls.
sometimes, I feel like, I don't know... my feelings of Fuck. It. All. are only barely contained by a soap-bubble of control. or maybe it's just seasonal depression ennui. short tempered, cheerless, why bother? nevemind, I don't really care. I can't find any good.
it sucks.
My pain contract is a lot less restrictive than most, but now that it's been used to deny me emergency care twice in three weeks, I'll be talking to my doc about how absolutely necessary it is--and I'm getting a copy to carry with me. Mine pretty much amounts to "Be honest and don't get hooked". The biggest clause I deal with is "if you go to an ER or have emergency treatment by a specialist, follow up with your MD whether or not pain meds were involved."
My followup after the (unladylike words here) dental surgeon is in just about 2 and a half hours.
BigV, long nights and cold temperatures can really mess with the human psyche. That's why Norwegian Black Metal is so...Norwegian, is my theory. My sweetie HATES winter. He gets restless, paces around the house, has trouble focusing, and gets what passes for short-tempered in his case (which isn't much; he is a gentle soul).
footfootfoot said:
Wow, that whole ordeal sounds abusive. What is a pain contract? I've never heard of one. The surgeon sounds like a prick who wasn't listening to you or your needs. I'm sorry you had such a shitty experience.
Well, I've reported back to my regular dentist that said abusive prick insulted my regular dentist (2nd generation of a family practice--his dad used to fix my teeth until he retired and the son took over), and I don't think that's gonna go over well.
As for the ER doc who saw me on Black Friday when I had 2 in-the-bone dental abscesses and who yelled at me for asking for help with pain because my normal pain meds (which are pretty mild, really) weren't touching it, he's being investigated by the hospital for that stunt and for sending me home without even antibiotics. My neighbor was with me the whole time (gee, now why would I be insisting more and more on having a witness at any medical situation NOT involving my regular doc & dentist?) and the person in charge of the investigation has his name and number. He's said he will be MORE than happy to tell them what a d*ck the ER doc was.
footfootfoot said:
Wow, that whole ordeal sounds abusive. What is a pain contract? I've never heard of one. The surgeon sounds like a prick who wasn't listening to you or your needs. I'm sorry you had such a shitty experience.
Well, I've reported back to my regular dentist that said abusive prick insulted my regular dentist (2nd generation of a family practice--his dad used to fix my teeth until he retired and the son took over), and I don't think that's gonna go over well.
As for the ER doc who saw me on Black Friday when I had 2 in-the-bone dental abscesses and who yelled at me for asking for help with pain because my normal pain meds (which are pretty mild, really) weren't touching it, he's being investigated by the hospital for that stunt and for sending me home without even antibiotics. My neighbor was with me the whole time (gee, now why would I be insisting more and more on having a witness at any medical situation NOT involving my regular doc & dentist?) and the person in charge of the investigation has his name and number. He's said he will be MORE than happy to tell them what a d*ck the ER doc was.
If you don't get satisfaction I'm sure the cellar can make a google search of the doc show your description of his treatment a first page result. UT can explain.
True and still more effective than a bad Yelp review. (I had a bad dentist and we plastered his practice name all over a thread due to his poor work.)
True and still more effective than a bad Yelp review. (I had a bad dentist and we plastered his practice name all over a thread due to his poor work.)
And that thread is gone for some reason.
I offered thread removal to him, because we were tromping into dangerous territory. He did not know who I was, but offered a few times to "take care of things", and I could not tell whether his motivation was to work out my identity to begin something legal.
Not previously stated was... this guy encouraged my ex to initiate a malpractice suit against a different dentist. One that had improperly treated her, but I don't know if it was malpractice level...
Later I found out... this other dentist was about to be a direct competitor, after he moved offices.
I'm not saying. I'm just saying.
I wonder how some people justify shit like that to themselves?
without a second thought.
I'm eating a can of Vienna sausages in a bourbon bbq (flavored) sauce, when I skewered one w/the teethpick, pulled it outta the can...and it was round, and wrinkly on the other end.:greenface
Felt like what I imagine eating a little puppy peter dipped in bbq sauce and skewered on a teethpick would feel like.
I think I just ruined Vienna sausages for myself. That, or puppy peters, one or the other.:neutral:
That was just the end of a sausage string.
It's the jungle out there.
That was just the end of a sausage string.
I am familiar with sausage.
I am familiar with sausage.
I had heard that.
Stop that. Stoppit right now.
Silly.
I have no idea. but today I keep bursting into tears. life is just a sucky pile of shit sometimes and I'd really like it to stop beating on me and mine ktxbai? I'd love to be able to put it down to the menopause but I can't yet, apparently. ...that joy is still to come :(. Just shoot me now. Or make it stop. Give me a fucking break. I'm ready for the winter break
Watching the PA Farm Show on TV, they have a team competition where the teams shear sheep, clean, card and dye the wool, spin the yarn and weave a shawl. Then they judge them and auction off all the shawls, all in one day.
The Grand Champion shawl, which went for $2700, was modeled by the team leader, a woman with PURPLE HAIR. Obviously a natural leader. :D
Monster is obviously a natural leader, and doing a damn good job. Amirite?
A fearless liter!
Fearless litre.
Fixed it.
I have no idea. but today I keep bursting into tears. life is just a sucky pile of shit sometimes and I'd really like it to stop beating on me and mine ktxbai? I'd love to be able to put it down to the menopause but I can't yet, apparently. ...that joy is still to come :(. Just shoot me now. Or make it stop. Give me a fucking break. I'm ready for the winter break
I'll vote for that.
I (just) have a wee bit of flu. So after Mr Limes went to work this morning, I sat and bawled and wailed I want my mummy. I haven't felt this rough in twenty years.
This too shall pass. :tuba:
Momdigr called me to tell me that Popdigr just passed out cold in the store they were in (about 75 miles away), bonked his head pretty good on the concrete floor. Out for "a little while". Ambulance, ER, yadayadayada, CATscan, wait.
Don't know if they'll keep him yet. She'll call back when she knows something else. I keep a go-bag ready, so I'm set. I'll grab some stuff for them if they keep him, because I know she ain't leaving him there.
The thing that worries me is she said he didn't know what year it was, and didn't know Trump was the next pres. When the EMT asked him who was pres, he said Obama, when he asked who would be pres tomorrow, he said Obama. That scares me a little.
Waiting. Waiting.
That SUCKS I'm sorry Grav
Ah damn Grav, hope he's ok.
The memory thing - probably just a little disoriented.
*Hugs*
Yes, very scary Grav, but it might be something very recoverable, just seems worse because he ain't 20 any more. hang in there, all three of you.
Thanks.
Waiting.
:confused:
He probably hadn't eaten recently. He's went all passy outy a couple times from that. Both times at home. She said he was out longer this time than the others.
Plus banging his brain bucket off the floor couldn't have helped.
I'd say they're keeping him by this point in the evening. Just to be certain. Unless he's really noisy about going home
Give the old guy a hug from us, Grav. Hope he feels better soon.
Sending good vibes. Prolly keeping him overnight just in case, as Monster says. X
Sent by magic.
Sending great vibes his way.
[YOUTUBE]MGl0sTtma4s[/YOUTUBE]
They are on their way home.
:cheerldr:
My friend fainted in a grocery store line years ago, and it was worse for her. She smashed many of her teeth out and broke her jaw when she went down. Took months to get better. And they wouldn't let her drive for a year in case it happened while driving.
Glad pop digger is coming home!
awesome news! I made that happen by saying it wouldn't ;)
My friend fainted in a grocery store line years ago, and it was worse for her. She smashed many of her teeth out and broke her jaw when she went down. Took months to get better. And they wouldn't let her drive for a year in case it happened while driving.
I fainted once on my college campus, but the jackasses at the health center insisted that it happened because I had anorexia (which I absolutely did not have) and told me to go home and eat a sandwich. Never did figure out why.
Glad the Popdigr is back home!
They were probably thinking of
fasting hypoglycemia; but, mislabeled it anorexia. The term
fasting is a category that includes many things (e.g. meds, hormone levels, ETOH overdose...etc.). Follow the link.
They probably thought you tied one on the night before causing your blood glucose level to crash and sent you home to get some carbs into your system. :D
That still would have been stupid, as I told them repeatedly I'd eaten twice already that day. They assumed everyone who walked in was lying. At the college health center the only diagnoses given out were eating disorders, drug dependency, pregnancy, and STDs. It was not physically possible for a student to be sick in a way that wasn't directly their fault. I once went in with an allergic rash, and my diagnosis was, "Heh, you girls and your bath products." They honest-to-God told my gay friend he "probably" had AIDS without any kind of blood screening.
Well then I'm surprised they didn't accuse you of holding your breath until someone gave you your way and when they wouldn't you passed out.
It was the vibes.
Fuckin' A.:devil:
My nerves are still jangling.
Sleep prolly ain't happening.
We be praying for Popdigr.
They are on their way home.
:cheerldr:
w00t!
He's sore as shit today. But his head don't hurt. The docs gave him a copy of his ekg to take to his regular doctor, and they said the CATscan looked good, no problems from bumping his head when he hit the floor.
He seems a little down today, says he feels rough. He's got a little inner ear balance thing going on, he gets this a couple times a year, maybe just a coincidence.
The lady what works for the store who watched him go out and fall called last night after she got home from work to check on him.
We have no idea how she got the number. Momdigr said she was a very nice lady.
We have no idea how she got the number.
Probably from the store's lawyer.
Glad to hear the good news.
Such good news, sorry late to the party, thrilled for your good news.
Say hi to Popdigr and hope he's back in the saddle as soon as he wishes.
Yeah, I'm late too. It was all over before I could post, but it good to see that all is OK :)
Thanks guys.
He was back to his normal self pretty quickly. He'll be having a stroke soon enough, though, when he starts getting the bills for this latest adventure.
I miss having a best friend and partner to share stuff with.
You're gonna hafta get over that if you're gonna die old and alone.
I'd offer either or both of my sisters... But I like you too much. If only I knew someone I disliked, I could solve several problems at once.
Momdigr just called from the next town over. From the hospital there.
They were getting ready to make the turn to come home, when Popdigr said "Go straight here." And then proceeded to the hospital. He's in fairly severe pain from his waist up. Back, shoulders, neck, head. Popdigr, like me, doesn't tolerate pain well. But, he doesn't complain about it, ever. If he wanted to go to the hospital, he must be in dire circumstances.
During this phone call, and only till this call, I learned that she took him to UrgentCare Thursday night.
And to the local emergency room Saturday night.
They never said a word about it.
And now I'm kinda scared.
Waiting.
*hugs*
That sucks Grav.
That kind of not telling is something my mum would do.
I'm sorry Grav. Hope they get him straightened out.
ugh sorry. hoping it's something simple to fix, maybe pressure on a nerve somewhere they can relieve?
Waiting and worrying. Sucks.
Hang in there man. I'm hanging with you.
Oh man, that sucks big time when all you can do is wait. :(
When she hung up earlier, she said "Here they (the docs/nurses I assumed) come back now. I'll get back to ya.".
That was over an hour ago.
This does not make me feel better.
This not telling me stuff is not gonna fly. They getting they ass stepped in w/both feet when they can stand it.
Fukkit, I can't stand it, I'm going up there.
Drive carefully.
Sent by magic.
Back home. All of us.
Tomorrow begins the breaking off of the feet in the asses.
Now that I'm not as worried I'm madder than mad.
The docs think maybe whiplash, btw, from the fall when he passed out at the store a few weeks ago.
You, will get over it.
I'm a tiny bit sorry for you, I know that shit is super stressful.
MomDigr and PopDigr, welcome home.
Watch yer asses.
Glad everything is cool.
See, you should have eaten, now you're drinking on an empty stomach, and going to be even madder in the morning.
I'm glad there is a decent explanation. Parents can be damned frustrating, but love them while you have them.
I have no feet. They are shin deep in parent ass.
Now I can't enter the ass-kicking contest.
I'm glad there is a decent explanation. Parents can be damned frustrating, but love them while you have them.
There is no decent explanation for not informing me of what is going on. I can understand not wanting every Tom, Dick, & Harry to know your bidness, but...They are my parents. They live in my house. I think I'm entitled to know if they're in ill health.
They didn't know what to say when I started in this morning. That's probably the worst I've ever spoke to Popdigr. Momdigr? Oh, we've went 'round and 'round.
Did they seem to get it once you were done?
It'd be a shame if they didn't understand after you went through all the trouble of making a foot deposit in their asses.
Why is it suddenly so dark, and what the fuck is that smell?
Why is it suddenly so dark, and what the fuck is that smell?
Haggis!
Sent by magic.
Why is it suddenly so dark, and what the fuck is that smell?
Nice hat, ass.
Sorry I missed all this. Glad they are OK.
did a little of that when my dad has his fall.. Grrrrrrrrrr
in other news...
I'm upset that the annual ordeal of reauthorizing my mom's living situation is in a state of fourth degree fuckery.
Mom had a stroke many years ago and has since been living in an assisted living facility not long after she moved to Seattle. Every year, there is a resubmission of the paperwork and justifying documentation to stay in the tiny studio (bed and bath) where she lives. For many years, the reauthorization was just a hassle, find the paperwork from the Office of Personnel Management (sent to my house), make copies, send to the state Department of Human Services, schedule her caseworker evaluation, wait for the wheels to turn, then done.
That's the 50,000 foot level. Each step can go sideways fifty different ways. Mom can't speak, for example. This is an everlasting complication, for everybody. Case workers, care givers, children, everybody. She has two annuities, one for her and one as a survivor of my Dad. She doesn't get Social Security. She has health insurance, but ... heh. As you can imagine, that's been complicated. I could go on but I'm too tired and I just want to drink and cry.
I got a call today from the caseworker saying that her case has been closed. Yay. um, not yay, closed and denied. Because the paperwork for her annuities has not been submitted. This particular detail has been fucked up several ways. Too many cooks in the kitchen (me and my sister). Cooks leaving the kitchen with food on the fire (sister leaving the area and going radio silent) -- an aside -- I don't get along with my sisters very well. We're all a bunch of hard headed smarter than thou passive aggressive I-can-do-it-without-you assholes. Sadly, it's Mom that suffers. Anyhow.
I'm left dealing with it this year and when I moved, I neglected to change Mom's mailing address when I changed mine. Fuck. Dealing with the OPM is an exercise in bureaucratic frustration in the best of times, but dealing with them on behalf of someone else is extra super stupid difficult. Get Mom's PoE, you say? Not as easy as that, and I quote:
Power of Attorney. OPM does not recognize Power of Attorney
it says that in a lot of places, especially the places where I would be doing business.
anyhow, I'm retyping this post after losing part of it so I'm gonna limit my losses here.
Dealing with the paperwork and the caseworkers and the websites and my Mom who doesn't really understand it but gets the worried vibe, fuck. I'm just tired. Now I have to file a petition for a fair hearing to see if I can stop her eviction. Wish me luck.
Fuck, man. I wish the best to all the Dwellar parents out there.
Agreed, nightmare. If you had worked hard and became a multimillionaire, even after your ex and lawyers took 70%, you could avoid this shit and give your sister the bird. Maybe bought the Seahawks too. ;)
Power of Attorney. OPM does not recognize Power of Attorney
I thought refusing to recognize power of attorney was illegal, even in Seattle! I had nothing but paperwork Hell being on welfare there for almost 10 years awaiting a disability hearing. At one point, I had a case manager who was in the "legendarily awful" class. Called her once when my food stamps were like 8 days late and I'd gotten no mail, and her exact answer was:
"Oh, I misfiled a piece of your paperwork and because it wasn't where it was supposed to be when I needed to look it up I closed your case." She also canceled benefits 10 months out of 12 on one of my roomies, and when that dude got his disability hearing the judge was so pissed he had that case manager (whose college degree was in business management, not social services) investigated...and FIRED. Getting a state worker fired ain't easy!
Then again, I also thought banks were required by law to treat cashier's checks like cash, until my sweetie put his entire bank account into a cashier's check for us to use on getting a place in Montana, and going alphabetically down the list for 3 counties I hit Farmers State before I got a bank willing to even consider a cashier's check.
BigV, I'm pulling for ya with heart, soul, and mind!
My mom's falling apart physically, but is finally in a situation where I don't have to worry about her not having on-site help if she needs it, which is good because we live 700 miles and 3 mountain ranges apart. Not exactly a quick jaunt.
And your narrative touches on several reasons why if I ever have to see downtown Seattle again, I wish it could be with a tactical nuclear device on my person!
*hugs*
That sucks Grav.
That kind of not telling is something my mum would do.
Grav, hope all stays well with the Dgr elders for a good long while! Sounds like a stress break for your whole family is in order.
DanaC, I know how that feels. My mom waited like 3 years to tell me she walked around for over a year with the back half of her heart paralyzed due to viral cardiomyopathy! Didn't want me "too scared" about the fact she could easily have just dropped dead making coffee some morning. Luckily, in her case her heart eventually started doing ALL of its job again.
And what's upsetting me today is my own health. I mean come on, really? I already deal with:
Severe Generalized Anxiety Disorder (with associated panic attacks and mild OCD)
IBS
Osteoarthritis
TMJ (my whole life, not the kind you get gritting your teeth--the kind that warps your lower jawbone your whole life, to the point that it's changed the shape of my outer AND inner ears)
Tinnitus--related to the TMJ, and in my case very severe, constant multiple notes in both ears.
Loose connective tissue. All of it. I can now pop in like 3 places that aren't joints.
Massive congenital swayback
Terrible teeth no matter what kind of care I take of them. Seriously, my anti-dry-mouth toothpaste is $20 a tube and I'm still losing teeth. Sometimes my fillings pop out while I floss. Last summer the dentist was fixing a broken uncrowned root canal and the crown next to it--post included--popped right out of my jawbone. Never had any trouble with the other 3 crowned root canals he's done for me!
Acquired Angioedema, Type 2 (catalyzed by an ACE inhibitor drug for blood pressure control) which can kill me by slamming my trachea shut any damn time it wants for the rest of my life.
AND NOW we can add costochondritis! This is the sudden inflammation of any or all cartilage in the ribcage. I haven't taken a full breath in over a week because my lungs won't inflate properly. Half the time I can't move my left arm without screaming because much of the inflamed cartilage is where that particular joint ties into the ribs. All I can do is take Aleve (which does not work on me--I got to try it when it was so new there was no OTC version) or Motrin (which makes me bleed internally) and wait. Maybe a few days. Maybe a few weeks. Maybe a year.
I find that upsetting.
I also find it extremely upsetting that after 9 years on permanent disability, now that we have a Republican-dominated administration, I've suddenly gotten a letter stating that I have to prove I am still permanently disabled. W. T. F.??? Why the hell do these people think I was forced into a legal hearing over it in the first place? One that resulted in a ruling of PERMANENTLY UNABLE TO WORK. From a JUDGE. Not a social worker, not an agency, not a committee--a JUDGE.
Tell us about your SSRI experiences
Grav, hope all stays well with the Dgr elders for a good long while! Sounds like a stress break for your whole family is in order.
Thank you, Snakey.
About five days of flu/head cold and the sinus pressure to go with. Worst. Headaches. Ever. I don't know that I would live with this kind of pain. My whiskers hurt. All the teeth on my left side are screaming. I can feel my eye blink from the top of my head all the way to my chin. I've took everything. Nothing helps. Can't sleep. Can't lay on my left side, and that's the side I sleep on most of the time. Anbesol helps the tooth part. For about five minutes.
Worst. Headaches. Ever.
Have you tried Claritin D?
That's Daddy's Little Helper when I'm feeling like you're feelin. Of course, it's a precursor to methamphetamine so you have to show ID to buy it over the counter, but it's Worth. Every. Penny.
But if you skip that and just go to methamphetamine, you won't have to show an ID.
FloNase smells like shit and costs $30 a bottle, but it gets the job done. You'll be draining within seconds.
FloNase smells like shit and costs $30 a bottle, but it gets the job done. You'll be draining within seconds.
*takes notes*
After I use Flonase daily for a few weeks, I get nosebleeds.
But it work amazingly up until then. The generic CVS brand version works great too and is slightly cheaper.
FLONASE Nasal Spray also contains microcrystalline cellulose and carboxymethylcellulose sodium, dextrose, 0.02% w/w benzalkonium chloride, polysorbate 80, and 0.25% w/w phenylethyl alcohol, and has a pH between 5 and 7.
Simple saline spray used to work just as well for me, but I'm sworn off of all of them.
I'm a huge fan of neti pots, myself. But you have to use them daily for maintenance, they don't help much once you're completely blocked.
Have you tried Claritin D?
That's Daddy's Little Helper when I'm feeling like you're feelin. Of course, it's a precursor to methamphetamine so you have to show ID to buy it over the counter, but it's Worth. Every. Penny.
I tried Claritin back when I suffered worse from fall allergies (ragweed), never got any reflief with it.
Aaaaaanywho...the pressure is gone as of this morning sometime before 4. I know it was a little before four, because I woke up
at four in a pool of cold snot.
Also, I don't buy anything (meds wise) I have to show ID for. It's nobody's business if I got a runny nose. Besides it just rubs me the wrong way, and the only thing I can do about it is not participate.
Remember, if your nose runs and your feet smell...you're upside down!
I'm so unhappy the skin around my eyes is raw from crying. I need the world to stop throwing unsolvable piles of shit at me and mine. I'm a fixer, not a hugger and when I can't fix shit I don't know what to do :(
sorry, I just needed to tell someone cos the world doesn't listen and seems to think I can handle it all and then some but I can't and no-one can help me
.......and less than 5 minutes from posting, another house fell on us :cry: wtf did I do????????? I'm really not a bad person, I'm not
well, I'm not anonymous, but I'm as personal as the internet can get--I'm so sorry you have houses and shit heaped on you. I'd help if I knew how. not prying, just sayin.
:hug:
.......and less than 5 minutes from posting, another house fell on us :cry: wtf did I do????????? I'm really not a bad person, I'm not
IIRC things end up OK in the end, but there will be a few rough patches. ;) :comfort:
everything's going wrong here. Miserable anyway, just because, then one boy in trouble at school -me row with teacher- more to follow.... then this evening both boys suffered academic rejections and girl opened large present from amazon to find it damaged. refund no problem but she's a student without a car and is supposed o repack it and haul it to a UPS store to ship it back first? and I'm getting attacked by a mosquito
Sorry monster. Sounds pretty shitty. :(
Illegitimi non carborundum
Squash that mosquito with malice and aforethought. It's a small act but it'll make you feel better... Promise. :yesnod:
Rough spot, eh?
Crush some heads.
[YOUTUBE]8t4pmlHRokg[/YOUTUBE]
Illegitimi non carborundum
And that.
Throwing sympathy at anonymous and Monster from over here! I know about being a fixer not a hugger, but sometimes a hug (given OR received) does fix things, if it's all you can do. Jus' saying'.
:grouphug:
That does sound shitty monster. I second the head-crushing, it's a nice release.
There's that soft spot when a head hug crosses over into a head crush, surfing that fine line is key in these situations.
Another 80° day. I guess spring is here. This day started bad. No one was to stop by this morning so I could sleep late, but my bladder woke me at 6:30.
I couldn't seem to get going. Depressing indeed. So I smoked a bowl and shortly felt much better.
tarheel
So I smoked a bowl and shortly felt much better.
tarheel
Funny how that happens.:jig:
the usual. cancer sucks :cry:
Fuck cancer.
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sourced our bucket list vacation on expedia, had window of opportunity confirmed by doc Thurs, watched it get even cheaper on Fri, got all our ducks in a row to make it happen .....but too pooped to think straight enough to book it last night (Friday). Doubled in price today. Hoping it will go back to sensible prices by Monday when everyone is back at work and not sitting on the interwebs booking vacations..... :cry:
price dipped back down a tiny bit then skyrocketed :cry:
Sorry, monster. That sucks.
Sorry. :sniff:
I know you could use a vacation.
...it's a little better today.... thanks guys. I KNOW it's trivial in the grand scheme of things, but sometimes it's hard not to dream :)
Needing a break isn't necessarily trivial. Shit gets to ya. Ya need a release.
Take an evening. Get drunk or something.
Something.
oh fuckety fuck fuck it's skyrocketed again :( almost made it down to affordable again and then.... guess I'll have to try unhang myself from that trip and find another that meets the basic requirements . cunt bastard fuck shit hate hate hate hate hate.
OMG........ what a horrific experience, but good news to report.... it's booked! and for not a whole shit ton more than the best price we saw originally!
The long story.......
decided to bite the bullet and pay the higher price today rather than waiting in hope because yolo and all that. As I was booking suddenly the hotel we picked was no longer available (then why the fuck did it show up in the search results?)... need to start over. try other dates we haven't tried before.... looked at other hotels.... timed out...... refresh.... wash rinse repeat............ hotel comes back. way more than we wanted to pay but doable. BOOK BOOK BOOK! get to the very last bit -return flight -suddenly there's an option that isn't at all unattractive to us (just one layover, no obvious difference from the others) that seems to take $500 each off the price...... clicked it to see... that happened... went through all the checkout... price still good..... all traveler, cc details entered, hit pay....it wants to log me in because it recognized the email address.... and the whole shebang disappears.
Called customer service, expected them to claim such a price was impossible..... took a while, she asked the price, said she would take care of us...... and found it pretty much, same hotel, slightly different flights, but no worse.... booked it... etc. Overall maybe we're paying maybe $500 total more than the very best price we saw when we weren't quite ready to book.....
a little good karma is long overdue I feel, so I'm not gonna worry about the shitstorm that must be coming as I normally would.... but I think I aged 20 years.
...and yes I did hold for another 5-10 minutes to talk to a manager and tell him how awesome the agent was.
...and yes I did hold for another 5-10 minutes to talk to a manager and tell him how awesome the agent was.
Awesome.
...and yes I did hold for another 5-10 minutes to talk to a manager and tell him how awesome the agent was.
That's very cool, proof of the good person I knew was beneath the facade of don't-give-a-fuck.
Congrats. Happy you guys have that to look forward to.
My cat, Caesar, died this morning.
He was 15. I'm just overwhelmed.
Going to bed now.
Aw shit, V. Hate hearing that, man.
I know ya done good by Caesar.
Yeah, that sucks. It's tough losing a friend.:(
My cat, Caesar, died this morning.
He was 15. I'm just overwhelmed.
Going to bed now.
So sorry, Big V. It truly hurts to lose a family member. ((((Hugs)))))
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A friend of mine has decided, after numerous cancer episodes, that she will no longer use western medicine to treat her cancer, and will now employ holistic treatment including veganism.
Judi Thompson RIP.
It took 3 1/2 years. To recap, after the first seven months she returned to western medicine -- which then took heroic measures. It hasn't been a great life since then, full of chemo and nausea and pain, and treatment after treatment, as it spread to her spine, liver, eventually her brain. But she has been kept alive for her children and family.
Do not go gentle into that good night
Dylan Thomas, 1914 - 1953
Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Condolences on your friend, 'Toad.
My thoughts are with you, and with her family, UT. X
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The fact you have plenty of warning and it wasn't if but when, doesn't seem to help much when it happens. If you're real close and see the ongoing struggle/suffering, it can be a sense of relief the pain has stopped for them, but it still hurts for those left behind. :(
You saw this coming, but it still sucks. Sorry.
No glamorous female celebrities have come forward to accuse me of sexual harassment. I'm a failure. :sniff:
Upset isn't precisely the right word. Very sad is better.. Today we're euthanizing our dog, Jack. He's really old, can't get out of the way of his own incontinence, trouble getting up, falls down, etc.
I dug his grave last night. Leaving work soon for the sad event.
Damn dogs, they don't live long enough. Why can't they switch with Parrots. :(
Shit, V. Sorry about Jack, man. I know (and you know) you did your best for him, and made his life better than it might have been. I also know, for a fact, that doesn't make it easier.
:sniff:
[size=1]Damned dogs.[/size]
Thanks guys...
Home now. Traveling vet said he could count on one hand the number of dogs he's seen as old as Jack. He, Jack, had some treats as the medicine took effect. He's 'resting peacefully' in the living room now, or on the sand at Cannon Beach, depending on your worldview.
Probably Cannon Beach....
We'll be putting him in the ground later. It's raining steadily which will provide excellent cover for our tears.
You did right by him, though it’s such a tough call to make. Hugs to you and your family as you say farewell to your steadfast friend. X
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*hugs* You did right by him my friend. It's one of the most important duties we have towards our four legged family members.
It's heartbreaking though.
Sorry your friend is gone.
Thanks guys...
Home now. Traveling vet said he could count on one hand the number of dogs he's seen as old as Jack. He, Jack, had some treats as the medicine took effect. He's 'resting peacefully' in the living room now, or on the sand at Cannon Beach, depending on your worldview.
Probably Cannon Beach....
We'll be putting him in the ground later. It's raining steadily which will provide excellent cover for our tears.
Oh, man. :(
My thoughts are with you and your family today, V. Saying goodbye to one of your best friends is
such a hard thing to do . . .
Drat, my mascara is running. Must be all the dust....
I feel for you. I always hate putting down a close friend. Dogs have a way of getting into your heart like nothing else.
I'm sending prayers to you today.
It is hard to do, even knowing it is absolutely the best thing.
My big, black, beautiful, Bombay boy, Slick will be gone three years next month.
Still gets me.
Beest is in the hospital again. :( think it's pretty minor in the scheme of things but they don't like to take any chances. And it's been a hideous 8 hours fighting for common sense (we won) I just got home, it's 3am, my alarm goes off in an hour.... trying to email the stupid school to explain why thunderboy will be late, stupid email not stupid working.
it's lonely without my partner in crime
:( Hope Beest is feeling better shortly and back at it with you.
Sorry to see this, Monster! Hope he's back where he belongs soon x
:( that sucks Monster
Makes my reason for being upset seem trivial. Which is probably no bad thing.
Went in to work today to discover that, because the higher ups made some flawed decisions on risk and because they underestimated claim costs for escape of water claims the UK division has large underwriting losses this year. The company as a whole is doing great - record sales figures for new business, great results from the home, motor and pet claims teams - great performance from the overseas teams - share prices at record high - but most stuff gets underwritten by the UK division (things like the hurricane damage in the US and Caribbean) so the losses in the UK underwriting are substantial.
So we're not getting our annual bonus. So the £600 bonus I was expecting next month is not happening.
Now that's a hell of birthday present for tomorrow.
So you aren't getting a bonus in part because people in Houston built houses inside of reservoirs and were surprised when they flooded.
Aye. It really is.
Any single one of these big losses/issues and we'd probably have still got a bonus - but as it is...
We're also getting a lower rated pay rise compared to the other regions.
Compared to many people in the UK it's not a bad pay rise - but it's still a little below inflation. My personal performance was rated good, and I'm at the lower end of my pay band, so my raise is 3.25 %
I think much of the disgruntlement is to do with how they announced it.
I don't generally rely on bonuses if I can help it - nice when they come, but it's the wage that counts. But ... last year, they were in the 2nd year of trying to recover from a bunch of bad stuff including serious bottom line losses and bad practice in one of the regions which in some cases was outright fraud - so new CEO and management team rescuing the company - there was a big push to cut costs and stop leakage from bad payouts - there were staffing issues and major weather events - all the signals were we're probably not getting a bonus - but then we did (I got 50% of the bonus as I'd only been there 6 months)
This year the signals we've been getting is rah rah, we're really turning things around and the claims teams are doing better than ever etc etc. Way to go team, we're really flying now - and no bonus.
Update: l sprung him!
Excellent news.
:cheerldr:
Update: l sprung him!
Glad to hear it. :thumb:
...back in on Monday for a sall surgery, but at least we know what's expected (single night ) etc..... Should have been tomorrow, but Thunderboy has swim championships and beest wants to see that, and situation is not currently critical
I don't know what sall surgery is, but I'm glad it's a quickie.
oh fuck off. :p:
it's not really small but ya know...... it's a 3 hour surgery with an overnight, but in the scheme of things.....
life is pretty shit right now, guys. I just can't post about it. There's kids and mothers etc to be endarkened. just going for the small snippets to help process. All y'all don't need to reply, just venting a little an a hidden spot, I know you're all rooting for us etc. thanks :)
Can't even begin to tell you how thunderboy fucked up today, he's a walking comedy of errors....... *sigh*
but at least his shin is healing where he took off most of the skin while shaving down last night... :lol: :rolleyes:
oh and my computer is a pile of crap and not overly portable so I'm trying to do everything from my phone and being and old and with dodgy fingertips and limited tryping skills, this is not going too well......
Glad to hear that Beest is home, we get little enough good news.
We are upset today because we just lost a friend. The young man that we befriended has turned on us. I asked him to pay me the money he owes me for my old MacBookAir that I sold him before Thanksgiving. I wanted my $100.00 and Keryx's cooler and some other things we had lent him since he is moving away. After accusing us of fucking him over he told me to fuck off and never contact him again. Fucking kids. We have no idea what we did to fuck him over.
Oh fargon! What a fucker! So sorry that your kindness has been abused :(
monster, you do have support from here. I'm glad to hear you know you can count on it. Obviously I'm concerned about Beest, but only after reading that over a couple times was I able to figure out it wasn't his shin that was skinned during some preparatory procedure.
poor thunderboy...
hang in there, hang in there.
Upset isn't the right word here, more the feeling you have where *more* is piled on, stuff you have to do stuff you have to worry about, stuff you don't have much agency to affect.
Eight days ago, we went to go visit my Mom, take her a present, say hi, etc--me and Twil and SonofV. We knocked on her door as usual and it took a looooong time before there was any action. My Mom had a stroke in 1997 and her mobility and her speech were both ruined. Consequently it takes her five minutes to walk the fifteen feet from her bed to the door, assuming she is already awake, already has clothes on, brace on, shoes on, cane nearby, etc etc. .... anyhow.
We waited a long time, an aide came in, then left, then more waiting. Finally I went in and found her stuck on the toilet. Not glued, but too weak to get herself transferred. Then she wouldn't let me do the transfer, and it sounded like she was in pain. I finally went to go get help and three aides and I all managed to get her standing up, cleaned up, and pants up. What an ordeal.
We sat and visited for awhile, but Mom looked like hell. We left and then Monday night I got a call that she'd been transported to the hospital. I was able to visit her Tuesday after work after being reassured that I didn't need to be on the first thing smokin. The dignosis was sepsis (!!!) possibly due to a UTI or pneumonia or both. I know UTIs in older patients is serious condition, and google tells me I should fear sepsis even more (thank you google, you fucker).
When I got to see her, she was groggy and in pain and the nurse asked me how long she'd been sitting on the toilet. This was Tuesday evening, and I recounted our long wait in the hallway on Saturday. Come to find out that Mom didn't come down for breakfast Monday, which isn't out of the ordinary for her. She didn't come down for dinner either, also not unusual, but in the same day, *that's* a problem. They came and checked on her and found her on the toilet again, throwing up a little and very weak. The nurse asked me about the wound on her butt. Um, what did you say? It appears that she'd been sitting on the toilet long enough to have an open wound in the shape of a toilet seat on her butt, I saw the picture the hospital took.
W. T. F.
Now an Adult Protective Services investigation is underway, initiated by the hospital social worker, who deserves a superhero cape in my opinion. After these many days in the hospital, she is responding well enough to the medical attention (no UTI, pneumonia antibiotics, pain medication, turning in bed, CT scan of head negative... maybe other stuff) that she is being discharged today to a rehab facility where she's been once before.
The goal at the rehab location is to PT to increase strength and tone to help get back to self transfers and to heal the wound. Mom spends a *LOT* of time sitting, except when she's lying down, also on her backside. Her time spent up and walking is ... nothing. It's the time spent transferring from one sit to another sit or lying down.
At her assisted living facility, a couple new services will be added to her account, things previously left to the resident--toileting assistance and skin checks. It sounds a little ... I can't think of the word. It's another assault on her previous adult independence.
She used to have it all together, as much as any of us. Then the stroke, that's the biggest bomb. The paralysis, the aphasia, those insults can fuck up your quality of life. Then my Dad died, her husband and caregiver, the man who loves her--another blow. She had to move across country, in with me and my family, which was chaos. Then move again to an assisted living facility. Some stability for awhile.
Time marches on as they say and her aging made her more susceptible to these new problems, and the indignities in response.
Protip:
Don't have a stroke.
I'm sorry BigV. That's a big load to carry.
Getting old sucks, not only for the cogger but everyone who loves them. :(
Upset isn't the right word here, more the feeling you have where *more* is piled on, stuff you have to do stuff you have to worry about, stuff you don't have much agency to affect.
Eight days ago, we went to go visit my Mom, take her a present, say hi, etc--me and Twil and SonofV. We knocked on her door as usual and it took a looooong time before there was any action. My Mom had a stroke in 1997 and her mobility and her speech were both ruined. Consequently it takes her five minutes to walk the fifteen feet from her bed to the door, assuming she is already awake, already has clothes on, brace on, shoes on, cane nearby, etc etc. .... anyhow.
We waited a long time, an aide came in, then left, then more waiting. Finally I went in and found her stuck on the toilet. Not glued, but too weak to get herself transferred. Then she wouldn't let me do the transfer, and it sounded like she was in pain. I finally went to go get help and three aides and I all managed to get her standing up, cleaned up, and pants up. What an ordeal.
We sat and visited for awhile, but Mom looked like hell. We left and then Monday night I got a call that she'd been transported to the hospital. I was able to visit her Tuesday after work after being reassured that I didn't need to be on the first thing smokin. The dignosis was sepsis (!!!) possibly due to a UTI or pneumonia or both. I know UTIs in older patients is serious condition, and google tells me I should fear sepsis even more (thank you google, you fucker).
When I got to see her, she was groggy and in pain and the nurse asked me how long she'd been sitting on the toilet. This was Tuesday evening, and I recounted our long wait in the hallway on Saturday. Come to find out that Mom didn't come down for breakfast Monday, which isn't out of the ordinary for her. She didn't come down for dinner either, also not unusual, but in the same day, *that's* a problem. They came and checked on her and found her on the toilet again, throwing up a little and very weak. The nurse asked me about the wound on her butt. Um, what did you say? It appears that she'd been sitting on the toilet long enough to have an open wound in the shape of a toilet seat on her butt, I saw the picture the hospital took.
W. T. F.
Now an Adult Protective Services investigation is underway, initiated by the hospital social worker, who deserves a superhero cape in my opinion. After these many days in the hospital, she is responding well enough to the medical attention (no UTI, pneumonia antibiotics, pain medication, turning in bed, CT scan of head negative... maybe other stuff) that she is being discharged today to a rehab facility where she's been once before.
The goal at the rehab location is to PT to increase strength and tone to help get back to self transfers and to heal the wound. Mom spends a *LOT* of time sitting, except when she's lying down, also on her backside. Her time spent up and walking is ... nothing. It's the time spent transferring from one sit to another sit or lying down.
At her assisted living facility, a couple new services will be added to her account, things previously left to the resident--toileting assistance and skin checks. It sounds a little ... I can't think of the word. It's another assault on her previous adult independence.
She used to have it all together, as much as any of us. Then the stroke, that's the biggest bomb. The paralysis, the aphasia, those insults can fuck up your quality of life. Then my Dad died, her husband and caregiver, the man who loves her--another blow. She had to move across country, in with me and my family, which was chaos. Then move again to an assisted living facility. Some stability for awhile.
Time marches on as they say and her aging made her more susceptible to these new problems, and the indignities in response.
Protip:
Don't have a stroke.
Oh, BigV. I'm SO sorry to hear this news.
I lost both of my folks last summer, 18 days apart. For the 10 months prior, I did everything I possibly could to keep my folks safe and comfortable, but every day they slipped one notch lower on the healthy/independent scale.
It's crushing to watch a parent go through this. My heart is with you. :sniff:
All our old folks are slipping right now. My MiLs hubby a retired professor of biology couldn't remember "porcupine" today. :(
Sorry to hear that, Griff. Was he doing the whole, "the, uh, the little animal with spikes, what's it called," or did he say the wrong word without knowing?
Sorry to hear about Mom, V. Sounds like you/they have things more in control now.:fingerx:
Now an Adult Protective Services investigation is underway, initiated by the hospital social worker, who deserves a superhero cape in my opinion.
Sometimes it just takes that one person to make a difference.
I have an update to my earlier unhappiness at not getting a bonus...
management have listened to the feedback (howls of derision on the company Yammer and message board and a palpable freeze in morale) and, with the input of the union reps cooked up a response over the weekend.
Yesterday we got into work to emails advising us that while we won't be getting our bonus, we are now getting a 'discretionary recognition award' - it's about 60% of what we would have got as a bonus, but 100% more than we were getting as we went into the weekend :)
I'm pleased for you.
but 100% more than we were getting as we went into the weekend :)
But now I'm thinking about math and am unsure of myself.
Well...the maths is no doubt incorrect - very much not my strong suit :P
[tangent]My kids call it "maths" ironically, because some of their favorite British YouTubers do it and they think it's hilarious.[/tangent]
Perhaps Dana was using historical math(s).
Sorry to hear that, Griff. Was he doing the whole, "the, uh, the little animal with spikes, what's it called," or did he say the wrong word without knowing?
He said "sloth" but he knew it was wrong.
Have him checked out by a neurologist, if he's willing. Word substitution is a different beast than poor recall. Mr. Clod's dad switched a few words, a nurse friend insisted he go see a doctor, and they caught a brain tumor.
Perhaps Dana was using historical math(s).
Yeah - yeah that's it. Historical maths - totally.
Have him checked out by a neurologist, if he's willing. Word substitution is a different beast than poor recall. Mr. Clod's dad switched a few words, a nurse friend insisted he go see a doctor, and they caught a brain tumor.
He's very resistant. He has been forgetting words for a while but refuses to take the meds he's been prescribed. I think he was trying to find porcupine in his head but sloth which he knew was wrong was the creature with similar characteristics, so that's all he had. :( He was always the absent minded professor type but it's getting worse.
Sorry. That must be so hard to watch. :(
Could be a series of vascular strokes. This is what my Dad had. Then a bigger one which had him calling everyone Fforbes, and everything either "chicken" or "egg". The entertainment value wore off pretty quickly ...
He's very resistant. He has been forgetting words for a while but refuses to take the meds he's been prescribed. I think he was trying to find porcupine in his head but sloth which he knew was wrong was the creature with similar characteristics, so that's all he had. :( He was always the absent minded professor type but it's getting worse.
Dammit, now I'm warping my own mind trying to figure out what characteristics a sloth and a porcupine share...
Slow tree climbing mammals. Something is tearing branches out of his tree likely a porky.
Besides, you're not old enough.
It has somehow eluded me that porcupines climb trees.
Must have killed that brain cell sometime or another.
cunty engineering teacher told Thor he has til Wednesday to turn in missing/corrected work or he will fail the class. Now OK, it's an extension, but his fucking father is fucking"actively dying" like this week and she's been informed. He needs less stress, not more -he clearly struggles with the regular fucking homework load as it is WTFF? :cry: This is too hard
This is the fucking fuck : drop it off the list. Forgiveness VS permission. Your instinct that other stuff is much, much more important is correct. Just stay on track, the teacher's stuff will wash out later. It will. You can freely forget about it starting now.
my daughter's facebook posts are breaking my heart. again.
Got a call from hospital last night, SonofV is back in the hospital for the second time in four days.
Haven't yet been able to reach him this time.
#sandwichgeneration ... But it's kind of a shit sandwich
Oh BigV! Hope you get through to him soon! x
Just got a medical bill for $10,000 due immediately. This shouldn't be possible. Beest maxed out his deductible back in January, we haven't had to pay anything since then. I think the hospital were so late in billing, the insurance was cancelled so refused to pay when hospital sent bill. Offices closed now, don't even know where to start :(
Just got a medical bill for $10,000 due immediately. This shouldn't be possible. Beest maxed out his deductible back in January, we haven't had to pay anything since then. I think the hospital were so late in billing, the insurance was cancelled so refused to pay when hospital sent bill. Offices closed now, don't even know where to start :(
Let it sit for a few days. Six months after my folks' passing, I was still getting bills for things that had long since been paid. Modern medicine's billing system is amazingly pathetic.
Just keep copies of everything in chronological order (most recent in front). When the time comes, you can call someone with all your data and shut them down in nothing flat.
In the meantime, have a cuppa and chillax. :)
yeah, I was just venting, but thanks :) I figured out the place to start is ignoring it :lol: I know it's not right, I just dread the dealing with it
.... despite a bajillion phone calls to prescription companies to confirm the account is closed, the patient is dead and they won't get fucking paid....... Beest is still getting emails telling him drugs are about to ship...... another one today for the super-expensive last ditch chemo pill that didn't work....
.... despite a bajillion phone calls to prescription companies to confirm the account is closed, the patient is dead and they won't get fucking paid....... Beest is still getting emails telling him drugs are about to ship...... another one today for the super-expensive last ditch chemo pill that didn't work....
Stiff upper lip, my friend. This baloney will continue for awhile. Just make a list, check it twice, and tick off each a-hole company in due time.
My particular headache was trying to close all my parents' bank, checking, and store accounts. It's like I had to have a note from my dead mother to get a few of them to shut things down and call it done.
*
smh*
To be fair, I would like it to be hard for someone to close my account and take all my money. :)
Have you heard of chemo donation programs, monster? They may not be legal where you are (or anywhere anymore, for that matter,) but the idea is that instead of flushing, whatever pills you have leftover can be donated to someone who needs treatment but has no insurance.
To be fair, I would like it to be hard for someone to close my account and take all my money. :)
Even when you have a POA
and a death certificate? As I have learned, a POA means next to nothing, and every creditor demands an
original death cert -
at $25 a pop.
*
sigh*
Even when you have a POA and a death certificate? As I have learned, a POA means next to nothing, and every creditor demands an original death cert - at $25 a pop.
*sigh*
you buy death certs in bulk here and they're only $5 each then :D
Even when you have a POA and a death certificate? As I have learned, a POA means next to nothing, and every creditor demands an original death cert - at $25 a pop.
*sigh*
I'm going to speak up for the creditors here - the laws governing data protection in the financial sector, certainly in the UK and Europe, but I imagine in the US too, are very strict and there are good reasons for that to be so.
It's a pain in the proverbial, and no doubt there could be some streamlining of the processes involved, but those protections are a necessary evil and in some cases hard won against the prevailing attitudes of the financial industries.
...chemo donation programs, monster? They may not be legal where you are (or anywhere anymore, for that matter,) but the idea is that instead of flushing, whatever pills you have leftover can be donated to someone who needs treatment but has no insurance.
Auntiedigr's husband died on a Friday. "The Authorities" came for his prescription painkillers the next Tuesday.
Fuck cancer.
I'm going to speak up for the creditors here - the laws governing data protection in the financial sector, certainly in the UK and Europe, but I imagine in the US too, are very strict and there are good reasons for that to be so.
It's a pain in the proverbial, and no doubt there could be some streamlining of the processes involved, but those protections are a necessary evil and in some cases hard won against the prevailing attitudes of the financial industries.
I get all of that, but I'd prefer that creditors put more energy into making it harder to open fraudulent accounts with fake IDs, instead of fighting against closing legit accounts because the owner died.
:eyebrow:
Auntiedigr's husband died on a Friday. "The Authorities" came for his prescription painkillers the next Tuesday.
Fuck cancer.
Well...... I finally got to sleep around noon the day after he died (just before midnight) and my phone rang an hour later to let me know they'd be here in ten minutes to collect the wheelchair (that we never used) and walking frame (used twice).
But they can they rent them to someone else for more charges. The drugs, they keep sending for more charges and just tell me to toss them.
I could fund my widowhood through the shit I have here.... Working on a donation to the local VA but it's so complex :/ They need a lot of paperwork to verify it all....
My doc told me to donate the super expensive meds I had after my stroke when they decided actually I didn't need the after all... but the procedure was so complex when I really didn't need stuff like that I gave up.
We also heard that local animal shelters can use some of the supplies that come with all the chemo stuff -sterile mats, saline syringes etc. They weren't interested.
Long Story, but anon donor paid for food at beest's funeral thing.
1) I needed to do it.
they took that from me. I knew i wanted to do it. (the swim community offered and I was working up to accept graciously, ecause I know they need to do something to help them grieve, but it was hard....) ...now I know I needed to do it. My husband. My goodbye.
2) I think I know who it is and they have an agenda. A documented Indian Giver
I talked to three friends about it independently (online). And two came up with the same name and all agree.
The whole thing feels soiled now :(
I know I'm an ungrateful biatch who can't take an intended complement. But here I'm allowed to be. This is not a well meaning individual.
That sucks. You have every right to be pissed off and upset.
That said - try your best not to let that be the takeaway. It was still your goodbye - because it just was - regardless of who paid for what. Don't let them have this. This is yours and his and they don't get to take it from you just because they paid a cheque.
payment is being refused/returned by venue (donor identity unofficially confirmed) Mulled it over with friends, don't need to give this manipulative asshole any wiggle room to violate my privacy or independence or invade my life etc. fixed. And feel so much better so it was the right thing.
Shame, his wife is lovely. But weak. And apparently I can't have one without the other.
You did what you needed to do for your peace of mind. That's more important than any feelings he may have on the subject.
You did what you needed to do for your peace of mind. That's more important than any feelings he may have on the subject.
This. So much this.
Sent by magick
You know when you hear that someone's severe mental health issues "fell through the cracks in the system?"
Don't believe it. There is no system. It's all one giant crack.
Families can pay between $1500-$5500 per week for moderate-to-great inpatient treatment--forever--or individuals can be locked up in abhorrent public hospital conditions for a max of 10-14 days before they are sent out the door again, whether or not they are better. Permanent institutionalization almost always has to be associated with a prison sentence.
'care in the community' is a fine idea if the funding and support services are there to provide the care part of that equation.
Nobody wants institutionalization as a response to mental illness anymore - but leaving them to cope on their own and occasionally hospitalisng them when the situation becomes dangerous is not the answer.
No little green flake in m'noodles.
Funny retort embedded; but, it's not for the squeamish:
[COLOR="White"]Congratulations, you've stopped picking your nose while eating! [/COLOR]
Oh, there's the flake, right there!
Stupid finance things and being alone.
Stupid finance things and being alone.
:grouphug:
Too much shit hitting too many fans.
1 - Oops I forgot to save for my taxes. I've been debt free for several years so having to make a payment plan with the taxman has been underlying background stress for a few months. But I'm paying it down.
2 - Husband is having major upsets over a stoopit financial clerical error which the stoopit clerk lied to him about, has confessed to management has not/will not apologise to husband, management are trying to make amends by sending out an interim cheque (ffs why not a transfer??) which has now had to be written and signed twice and there's still no sign of it at our house. All of this winds husband up a notch more and I'm repeatedly having to scrape him off the ceiling/pick him up off the floor.
3 - Our mobile holiday accommodation has sprung a leak and we're going away in it today. I was wondering how to hide this fact from husband as he doesn't need more stress but in the end confessed it to him as a far bigger piece of shit just hit a much bigger fan and I needed to offload some stress. We have high hopes of a Duct Tape fix for the weekend at least.
4 - The manager of a tiny charity facility for which I am chair of the board has made a $30,000 hole in the finances. Currently it is not clear if this is malice or illness. Hole = approx. 40% of turnover. FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK.
I feel you, anon. I swear to God, everyone I know's life is just going to utter hell right now. Hope things get better soon.
Husband has doc appointment to be signed off work for stress. Still no check in the mail. Big financial mess seems more likely to have been caused by illness than malice. It's raining. We have Duct Tape ....
"... videos gay..."
No, thanks though.
That sounds a very stressful situation anon - hope the duct tape works.
Dear anon
sorry to hear about your troubles, truly I am.
I wish to weigh in regarding the leak / camping / getting the fuck out of dodge.
A leaky domicile, camper, caravan, tent, etc. *s u c k s*. No question. I wear a necklace with a pendant I got at the end of The. Most. Epically. Rainy. Camping. Trip. Evar. Yeah, no, really. It was wet when we left the parking lot, wet all the way there, wet on the hike to the campsite, wet all night, wet all the way home. It was the only camping trip I ever went on in twenty years of camping with the Scout Troop that was cut short due to weather.
It's now regarded as a badge of honor, "Oh, you were on the trip to Shi-Shi Beach?! Duuuuude!" A brotherhood, albeit a wet one, was forged.
I don't know. I've been wet on outdoor adventures. Mostly it sucks. Sometimes, good can come of it. I hope you can use the time, and duct tape, to escape the rest of the shit-splattering "back home". Use the time away for what it can give you, even if it's wet.
I hope for the best for you, truly I do.
I feel you, anon. I swear to God, everyone I know's life is just going to utter hell right now. Hope things get better soon.
True dat. I hate drama.
Anon - is this tent-like portable habitation or aluminum? If aluminum, you might try epoxy to plug things up.
We're back. Although there was a little rain the accommodation didn't leak and we have helpful suggestions to add to the pile offered by Dwellars. We can solve that one moving forwards and most importantly our weekend which we desperately needed was great!
Husband is still being jerked around. I'm still scraping him off the ceiling/floor alternately.
The financial mess is more like $10,000 and definitely illness related. After a meeting of trustees we have a plan that involves everything from dumpster-diving to massive anonymous donations, and a lot of hard work. Also a plan to help the employee concerned. Fingers crossed everyone!
More fucking cancer.
As I sat at the score table at the water polo tournament we were hosting, missing beest, just after a co-team-parent who is living with brain cancer (and also happens to have been beest's GP) dropped of some refreshments for us scorers, another co-team-parent was pushed past the table in a wheelchair. I was shocked. More brain cancer. diagnosed just before beest's death, so no-one wanted to tell me at the time and it just kind of slipped along..... She has lost the use of one arm and is very weak from radiation and chemo an has more to go... What in the fucking fuck? :cry:
In 2018, an estimated 1,735,350 new cases of cancer will be diagnosed in the United States and 609,640 people will die from the disease.
Fuck cancer. That is all.
Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
Fuck cancer. That is all.
Dittoes.
My neighbor problems are coming to a head. Last weekend the problem form across the hall beat up my friend and partner because he was drunk and belligerent. He is drunk and belligerent every weekend, but last weekend was the worst in a while. We are all very friendly around here, and usually get along very well. Saturday morning several people from the building go to breakfast including the problem, he's sober at this point. about 2 hours later he is 3 screwdrivers and at least that many beers in and is getting outrageous with all the women around him. they leave on the boat to come back to the apartments and drop the problem off, he refuses to get out of the boat. Fast forward a couple of hours and there are cops and first responders all over the place. And I can't go outside and smoke a bowl. I'm going to put up a face book link to tell the story.
https://www.facebook.com/chad.christianson/posts/408555739676455?comment_id=408823506316345¬if_id=1535141554765491¬if_t=feedback_reaction_genericHave to belong to facefuck.
Have to belong to facefuck.
That sux, fuck fakebook. I'll figure out a way to copy and paste it.
Here is the story I was talking about.
If anybody knows my brother in last 5 years, they know that he has been doing great, and has been doing everything in his power to be there for his kids, and for his name to be slandered all over the new like this makes me want to confront every one involved. Karl Kaiser is a drink piece of shit that wsa boligerantly drunk on Saturday, and was kicked off of a boat, Erics boat, earlier that day. Let me rephrase, Karls drunk ass vaolentarily got off the boat, because we kept telling him to act like an adult. He failed to do so, and then got off at Pettibone beach. He [roceeded to get a ride back to the apartment building, where he sat and stewed over it until the boat came back to the dock with my brother and a neighbor in it. As the two went into the buildings, Karl Kaiser went down to the boat, acased criminal damage to property, throwing property into the river, and on the beach. He then took the cooler out of the boat, up to his patio, and dumped all the beverages down the bank, which in my opinion is littering. HE proceeded to take the broken cooler, that he broke, up to the neighbors apartment, where he started a confrentation. the neighbor kept his cool, and told him to go away. the neighbor then went down to look for his sandals that were thrown from the boat, and stolen from another neighbor in the other building, at which Karl came down and started yelling at said neighbor. Karl proceeded to punch the neighbor, who was looking for his stolen sandals, in the face multiple times. The neighbor still kept his cool, and took the blows. By this time Eric iwas till in his apartment using the bathroom. Ericcame back down and Karl was sitting on his patio, when he ran his mouth to Eric once again. Eric was upset about his property being damaged, and his friend being beeat up, with nobody there to help him, so he confronted Karl, at which time the boligerantly drunk Karl Kaiser fell down the rocky embanctment. We have video proof to prove all of this, and it will be leaked out in court, when we go to trial in Erics favor, and proceed to press charges against the alcoholic Karl Kaiser. Anybody that knows Karl witll say the same thing. Hes a drunk asshole. He proves it in public, and all over social media. That is what really happened on Bainbridge last saturday.
Your story upset me, primarily because there's no mention of naked women in it.
Why was that problem person allowed on the boat in the first place?
The problem child ran off all the Naked Women with his drunken bullshit.
And he stole the correct spelling, too! That bastard.
I just lost the diamond out of my engagement ring :( I was lopping branches in the garden without gloves on and I walked away to see if the bike noise in the street heralded the arrival of bikerboy (it didn't), and i touched the ring to align it correctly and it felt wrong ...the diamond (and several tips) were gone. It was tiny and is unfindable. I am the person who can find a needle in a haystack, and take tenacity to a point of absurdity, but I am not even going to try to look for it.
:(
Bright flashlight at night tho? It's worth a shot
Sorry monster.
… Use a flashlight. Why do we love diamonds so much? Well, for one thing, they sparkle! Turn off all of the lights (or wait till night time if you’re looking outside), and get out your brightest, tight beam flashlight. … This trick is especially effective on hard floors and it is one of the first things we try anytime we need to find a gem on the ground. ...
… Fluorescence is your friend. Many diamonds will give off a colored luminescence when placed under ultraviolet light. This is normally invisible, but you can use a black light in a dark room to make the effect stand out. A diamond with strong blue fluorescence, for instance, will exhibit a blue glow in under a black light making it much easier to pick out from its surroundings.
it is really, really tiny. And the area is grass/weeds, fall leaves/twigs and garden wilderness. The whole ring cost 55 quid about 30 years ago. It's that tiny. I've told Thor he can try with the flashlight at night if he wants (coincidentally I bought new decent flashlight yesterday), but I most likely won't try. It is not going to be found.
...and the ring is destroyed anyway. I've had it retipped several times and it's never looked right. I can't imagine it would even be the same. maybe I'm in shock -my friend remarked I was taking it kind of well, but compared to losing beest earlier this year, it kind of fades into insignificance. It was just a thing. Finding it won't bring him back :( I'm still sad though.
Bought the Walmart MoneyCard, a prepaid Visa debit card. Had some stuff to pay online and figured this was an easy way. They have online activation, go put in the info. It says it "couldn't verify my identity." After looking it up I found that there are multiple causes, but it sure isn't because I don't know my name and social.
So now the card is activated but I can only swipe at POS, no online, no cash withdrawal, and the card can never be reloaded. Call the support line, told there's nothing they can do and the card is completely done once emptied. They have no process whatsoever to deal with what appears to be a common problem, judging by the one-star reviews online. I know Walmart is not exactly top tier but this is just ridiculous.
Learn from my mistake... avoid the Walmart MoneyCard and find a proper prepaid debit card. Look it up real quick and make sure the results aren't full of one-star reviews. Fortunately I can deal with it and get done what I need to, but it is a true pain in the ass. My options are to suck it up and spend the money away at POS swipe, or wait some weeks for them to send me a refund check.
it is really, really tiny. And the area is grass/weeds, fall leaves/twigs and garden wilderness. The whole ring cost 55 quid about 30 years ago. It's that tiny. I've told Thor he can try with the flashlight at night if he wants (coincidentally I bought new decent flashlight yesterday), but I most likely won't try. It is not going to be found.
99.9% of the jewelry in the world isn't worth shit compared to the experiences and memories the owner attaches to it. That's the real value of possessions. Even if Thor finds some pieces and you decide not to repair it, having those pieces in the jewelry box can't hurt.
@Clay
can you use it at POS to buy a different card that actually works? I used to sell prepaid Visa cards as part of a fundraiser for my kids' school, and they were only available in some very specific denominations, but we found we could buy a big denomination and use it to get cards in different denominations -e.g. but $100 card and change it into $50 and 2 * $25.
99.9% of the jewelry in the world isn't worth shit compared to the experiences and memories the owner attaches to it. That's the real value of possessions. Even if Thor finds some pieces and you decide not to repair it, having those pieces in the jewelry box can't hurt.
Booth boys went out with the flashlight but didn't find anything. It's really really small.
But you think memories etc are attached to certain things and I have been finding they kind of aren't. Which is a really weird realization for me because I'm a terrible hoarder. I'm sure it's shock and I'll be devastated later when something about the horribleness of it hits me more, but it was just a thing. Finding it won't bring him back. And the memories? They hit you when you least expect it. It's places and events and smells and sounds that do it...
I was at Thunderboy's Water polo tournament a couple of weeks ago on a Friday night. 4pmish game at a rival high school in town. First away game of the season. Sat in the stands (which never happens at the home games because I'm always on the score table), early for the game because I'd dropped him off an hour before the game for warm up... and it dawned on me beest wasn't going to walk in and join me just before the start of the game, straight from work, like he always did on such occasions. He wasn't coming. It was pretty fucking horrible.
Bizarre though tit might seem, if there ever was a best time to lose the stone out of one's engagement ring, this is probably it. Because I have a lot of shit to help me put it in persepctive.
I'm really fucking pissed tho. why didn't I take them off? Well, I was only planning on planting a couple of mini plants I just bought ...but it was a nice evening and the job just kind of escalated.... Why did I take my gloves off which might have protected it? Because the lopper id hard with gloves and not dirty or full of sap. :/
What if? pointless. Beest is till gone. And at least I managed to keep my ring in tact this long. He lost his before we were even married!
Here's a sad pic of the loss: [ATTACH]64796[/ATTACH]
...and that might still look bigger that it is ...I have child-sized fingers (diameter-wise, not trump-wise). I had to have the rings sized down because they don't make wedding rings in child sizes. My wedding band is fractionally smaller than a dime
Sorry, monster. If it's shock, well, I hope it stays that way. Otherwise, I commend you for letting it go so gently.
Other options to make it significant in its ongoing-ness: keep the band, replace the stone with one of a different color, reflecting this next stage of your life.
thanks, I think I will replace it, but with another diamond. Just because it's weird not to have it, (I discovered the loss by a habitual repositioning of it and it felt weird) and I'm not good at decisions like that. One of my other thoughts was to find the tiny bit of Topaz beest gave me for our 23rd (and last) wedding anniversary and have that put in, but then I came to my senses. Probably not jewelry grade, what if they fucked it up....etc etc and it's not a very becoming color, either...
You could have the kids decide what to put in, if it's just the deciding part that sucks. But another diamond is perfectly reasonable--it's the symbol, not the specific molecules.
yup.
no to kids deciding, remember Angelina's Jolie's wedding dress? :eek:
They might do OK and pick something like Beest's birthstone.
Oh shit.... I should get a googly eye mounted in there.....
can you use it at POS to buy a different card that actually works?
Yeah I was thinking about that, I'll give it a try if I need to. I bought a different prepaid debit card that works correctly using more cash. The Walmart card is now my pocket money. :)
@ Mon:
Before I went into buildings claims, one of the most common types of claim I dealt with was lost stones from rings (and lost rings). Even if you'd taken the rings off before doing what you're doing, at some point there's a good chance the stone would just come out at some point. It's the nature of rings.
Just keep in mind, if you get a new stone put in: beest didn't go and buy you the stone, he bought you the ring. All you're doing is replacing a component part.
Not upsetting, so much as unsettling:
Jude flies out to Hanoi in a week's time to start his new job -- He's going to be over there for minimum 1 year, possibly 3-4 if he likes it and they like him.
Now sure, he'll be back in the uk for visits a couple of times a year but still - feels really weird knowing he won't be in the next town anymore.
I've downloaded skype so we can stay in touch, but it's an unsettling thought nonetheless.
thanks, dana, yes I was paranoid about it happening.... at least now I get to lose that worry. This might actually be something worth claiming on my insurance. I'll take a look
Hi monster
I'm sorry you're upset about what's happened. But at least you'll always know where it is!
[YOUTUBE]hUcthgfYDVA[/YOUTUBE]
;)
I'd replace the diamond, too. Small diamonds aren't all that expensive,and the fee the jeweler charges might not be as much as a new ring. And they may let ya pay over time.
Plus, this ring will mean even more to you after the repair.
Hey Man, why don't you fix that dent?
Because it reminds me of:
1- the best night of my life.
2- the dumbest thing I ever did.
3- to remind me of something.
4- Personal reasons.
5- ________________
yeah, I started leaning towards not fixing it for that kind of reason, the shit happened, the original ring is gone, I can move on without it... but boy do i miss it on my finger, feels so weird and it's odd because there's still one ring there :/ still don't know what to do.
grav, thanks, cost is not the issue -I mentioned original cost to try and relay just how tiny and unfindable the diamond was. probably no more than 3mm diameter. and I loved it because it was itsy bitsy. I enjoyed that my rings were so traditional, but in miniature, as small as possible as opposed to the traditional as big as possible, I guess....
I'm kind of thinking not to replace at the moment. It's loss is part of my story.... I don't know :( It's been a rough week all around. i was already missing him so badly....
Fix the ring.
You will be so glad you did.
Don't have a right to say anything here, but just thoughts ...
I think in the long term I would feel better having the repaired ring with all of its associated memories than letting it go and sustaining the loss. It's a part of the story that can be changed, so maybe that's a reason to think about it.
Very sorry this has happened, monster.
I think hay fever is taking a parting shot. My nose is running like a waterfall, and my nasal passages feel like they're on fire.
Oh, and the runny eyes. Can't see nuffin'. And I feel like I'm about to sneeze. All the time.
I'm on a new med, don't know if it'll work out.
You know the old saying:
If your nose runs and your feet smell, you're upside down.
*checks orientation* confirmed
What is it that we are allergic to? Nothing is blossoming
Ragweed and goldenrod here but mold might be in play.
Mold! It blooms microscopically everywhere whenever it rains.
Mold! It blooms microscopically everywhere whenever it rains.
What is it that we are allergic to? Nothing is blossoming
Ragweed for me. AtchoosniffIcan'tsee.
Also, it makes a place two inches deep behind my forehead, right right in the center of my forehead itch like bloody hell.
It's maddening.
My BIL, A, has recently "completed" (?) a double mastectomy *and* chemo and radiation therapy for an unrelated lung cancer. Called him yesterday to check in with him. He sounded great, actually. And my sister, Y, saying hi in the background. She took the phone and told me she had an upper endoscopy scheduled for Thursday, wish me luck, etc. I told her "break a leg", ha ha.
About 1030 last night A called me from her phone saying they were in the ER and Y had just been given a diagnosis of "terminal pancreatic cancer".
...
What the actual fucking fuck?!
A had to travel to a different hospital for a blood draw today and Y had had more tests all night and a biopsy (or more) today, the results of which are still unknown to me.
Jesus H Christ, V, anything in their background that they both got cancer?
I mean like where they lived or worked or something?
Jesus. How devastating. My heart goes out to you and your family.
Fucking cancer.
Jesus. {{{Big V}}}
I'm sorry V, fuck cancer.
So sorry to hear that. Best wishes.
Thank you all. I have no more information since last night, only "I am staying here tonight and they're letting me have food."
This sucks, man.
Fuck cancer.
Jesus v, that's awful. How shocking.
Good morning friends.
I'm at the cancer treatment center this morning for Y's initial treatment meeting where I will learn what I can contribute as a member of her support team.
Since my last post, I have had one phone conversation with Y during which she told me about the ER visit and how things went. What a shit show. On top of the actual diagnosis, the experience, *especially* with the doctor (a doctor) was comically horrible. She told me how he asked her if she wanted the sugar coated version or the direct version; she chose direct. Then that sentence, and some raised voices, and some swearing by the doctor at his balky dictation equipment, and at one point him telling her to "shut up!"...
I am not looking forward to meeting this doctor.
Anyhow, she's recovered from his assholeness and we have this meeting today.
Also, importantly, thank you all for being my friends. You all mean a lot to me, and so do your words of support. Thank you.
Good morning friends.
I'm at the cancer treatment center this morning for Y's initial treatment meeting where I will learn what I can contribute as a member of her support team.
Since my last post, I have had one phone conversation with Y during which she told me about the ER visit and how things went. What a shit show. On top of the actual diagnosis, the experience, *especially* with the doctor (a doctor) was comically horrible. She told me how he asked her if she wanted the sugar coated version or the direct version; she chose direct. Then that sentence, and some raised voices, and some swearing by the doctor at his balky dictation equipment, and at one point him telling her to "shut up!"...
I am not looking forward to meeting this doctor.
Are there no
other competent oncologists in the area? A major part of an
effective treatment process includes a skilled, empathetic, and supportive medical team/staff. If the doctor is such an asshole, how can the patient have any real faith or trust in him/her? How will that lack of trust affect the patient's treatment/recovery?
Please, try to find a different doctor. :(
And give A and Y my love. And you too, big guy. :hug:
Hugs to you, Big V. What a fucker. Fuck cancer.
It seems this doctor's assholish bedside manner warrants a conversation. A private one.
:rtfm:
Even if the manual don't actually say so, I'm preeety sure the doctor shouldn't tell his patient to 'shut up'.
And he damn sure don't need to be telling MY sister to do so.
If it's not, that should be in the How To Be A Doctor manual.
Fuck cancer and asshole drs.
I’m so sorry, V. Sending love to you and yours.
Rough day for me and I'm just a bystander.
Y is in hospice day... Three I think.
Horrible fucked up day.
Rough day for me and I'm just a bystander.
Y is in hospice day... Three I think.
Horrible fucked up day.
:comfort:
Damn, V. The hits just keep coming, don't they?
I'll have one for ya tonight. And For Y.
Y is unresponsive now.
Fentanyl doubled twice this week increased twice today.
The harp music down the hall appears to have brought some comfort.
I'm functioning,... Yeah.
Y died at 3 am.
I am driving north to be with A now, and to say goodbye to her.
Being in motion helps.
Thank you all.
I'm "resting" in the ferry line headed home now. It's been a big day. I'm kinda wrung out and the phone's not the best keyboard for me, so this update is brief.
The day went well, very sad, but beautiful and tragedy and drama were conspicuously absent.
Fuck, I'm tired.
Y died at 3 am.
I am driving north to be with A now, and to say goodbye to her.
Being in motion helps.
I'm sorry, I just read this. I got ... nothing. Sometimes life just beats you up and keeps on beating. I find it so hard to believe the things we can do with technology and yet we can't cure this insidious invasive infuriating stupid fucking disease.:cry:
This insidious invasive infuriating stupid fucking disease was probably cured years ago.
No money in curing. The money's in keeping ya alive, not curing ya.
I feel this way because people/big pharma/money.
Fuck cancer.
Cancer is an umbrella name, for many different afflictions that develop from different causes. In all this time, spending boatloads of money, that haven't found a cure for one of them, not one. :confused:
Well they have found cures....but only if they're caught early enough. :(
yes? I don't know maybe I was just having an optimistic moment, but the two people I know who have been through leukemia have been in remission for 15+ years... :/ And one breast cancer survivor is up to ten or thereabouts
Remission is not cured, it's the next best thing.
Not really the place for it, but I couldn't help m'self:
[ATTACH]65640[/ATTACH]
Thinking of you, V, and your family. :(
Fuck cancer. Sideways. Ungreased.
With a dead dingo's dick.
yes to all above comments.
We're going tomorrow to where she lived, mostly to be close to my brother in law, A, and his family. I've only met one of my nephews, there's bound to be loads more of them for this event. Y's actual memorial service is Sunday. It'll be nice. I'm very close with A, I'm looking forward to meeting his family, despite the cause for the gathering.
I've felt a weight all week... sharing a burden makes it lighter, sharing with you, sharing with family. Thanks for sharing my burden. My Mom won't be traveling to the service--her choice. Traveling for her is an ordeal. I took her to see Y the week before while she was still capable of sitting up on the side of her hospital bed. That was good.
Someone suggested to me today, "sorry if this is premature..." (no, go ahead) "One way to process this, and other big changes, is to think about what this change now makes possible that wasn't possible before." I know it was offered in support and friendship, that's good. I'm thinking... It'll be ok.
If any of you are interested, send me a PM and I'll reply with a link to her obituary from her local paper.
1 - You can't change it no how much you wish you could.
2 - It's not selfish, it's normal to think about this affects your life.
3 - You may not be suffering as much as the condolences from others would suggest.
That's OK, you feel what you feel, and they do what they feel.
4 - This too shall pass, not go away, but hurt less with distance.
Thank you xoB.
You're a wise friend.
Durgin-Park is closing on January 12th. If you don't know what that is, nevermind, you won't care a whit anyway.
“I’d like to see them live on $12 an hour, the cheap bastards,”
:lol2:
[YOUTUBEWIDE]lBDN8yWyNYU[/YOUTUBEWIDE]
This fucking song.
Upset is not the right word. Overcome with emotion, powerful feelings of love and nostalgia for my BelovedDaughter most of all, but for my sons too. And for all the children (ha! HA!) of my extended family here. And for their parents my friends, all my friends here, parents notwithstanding.
Goes for them too, goes for all of this.
Carpe, mothertrucking Diem. This is not a drill.
Carpe, mothertrucking Diem. This is not a drill.
A friend in MA found his 50 year old son who lives with him dead in bed yesterday morning. No signs of trauma or drugs. Waiting for autopsy results while making funeral arrangements today. :(
Wellthat'sgottasuck.
Hope that doesn't happen to Popdigr.
I'm 50. Both Grandpasdigr died at 50.
I'm hoping to drop dead off a barstool. Or off a trollup.
Either way, really.
Bummer. A 50-year-old death is bad news to begin with, but to be found by their own parents... :(
The autopsy came back "damifino", now waiting for the toxicology report while kin arrive from hither and yon. Funeral Monday and interment on Friday. His wife is dead but he has a daughter living next door, one at the other end of the state and one in NH, which are close enough to go commiserate with if he wants to get out of the house for a bit.
Funeral Monday and interment on Friday.
Twice I read that as internet on Friday.
Fuck, man. We just got word that one of the teachers at my kids' school killed herself.
:cry:
:comfort:
I'm very sorry Clodfobble.
Oh that’s awful!
Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
A guy in Florida I've known/done some business with for about 14 years, in his early thirties with a wife and two small kids.
Eric 1-18-19
“So as far as my diagnoses, the problem began with stomach parasites. Swear to God I will never eat Pork again! I'm sure that was the cause. Anyhow, I have (been doing a parasite removal program since late Dec and will be keeping it up for at least another 4 weeks) 3 different kinds of pararsites that inflamed my biliary tract (liver, gallbladder and bile ducts) I also have aluminum, lead and asbestos in my system to further compound the problem. I started a heavy metal detox program too. Definitely feeling better but weak as can be from all the weight loss.”
He'd dropped from 160 to 120 lbs, I told him he better get a meat thermometer.
Eric 1-19-19
“I think I got it from Pork Osso Bucco at the Ale House. It seemed wrong and I almost sent it back but didnt.”
3-1-19
Dead.
Think about that next time you eat raw meat or sushi.
Think about that next time you eat raw meat or sushi.
Jeez. I'm sorry you lost your friend, and to such a seemingly non-lethal thing.
As for raw meat, I never eat it. Can't stand anything more than just a faint hint of pink in a burger or steak. I watch a lot of cooking shows, and they all insist that rare or medium rare is the way to go. I'd rather eat nothing than a blood-red steak. Gak.
But I
love sushi. :(
I knew raw pork was bad. I'm sorry about your friend, and his Wife and Kids.
The news from Christchurch New Zealand this morning. Stop the hate.
sick and tired of terrorist attacks. lessens my faith in humanity
:welcome: to The Cellar JKG!!
My friend's husband died from pancreatic cancer today. Kids same age as mine. We're not super close -our kids went to the same K-8 school, played soccer together, but I reached out to her after beest died and I felt able. It was too hard before because.... well just because. This stupid disease group just sucks. They took a totally different approach and shouted loud about it. (you guys were pretty much the only people who had an inkling of the truth for us), so I know she is surrounded by friends and love tonight. But it still sucks and I still feel helpless to help. Or something. I don't know what I feel.
monster, I'm sorry. Your feelings are important to me. I'm sorry you feel helpless. I feel (a fraction of your) helplessness too. It all sucks.
Not surprised you feel bad for her, you been there done that. But when her support has drifted off to something else, you'll still be able to connect with her.
She doesn't know it but you're her ace in the hole... and she may be yours.
Not surprised you feel bad for her, you been there done that. But when her support has drifted off to something else, you'll still be able to connect with her.
She doesn't know it but you're her ace in the hole... and she may be yours.
This. And hugs to you, Monster x
Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
Militia leader Ammon Bundy, famous for leading an armed standoff in Oregon, had a tender moment in November of last year. He recorded a Facebook post saying that perhaps President Trump's characterization of the migrant caravan on the U.S.-Mexico border was somewhat broad. Maybe they weren't all criminals, he said. "What about those who have come here for reasons of need?"
Bundy did not say he was breaking with Trump. He just asked his followers to put themselves in the shoes of "the fathers, the mothers, the children" who came to escape violence. It was a call for a truce grounded in empathy, the kind you might hear in a war zone, say, or an Easter Sunday sermon. Still, it was met with a swift and rageful response from his followers, so overwhelming that within days, Bundy decided to quit Facebook.
This is depressing. When one of if not leaders, at least someone who had the ear of the far right, when he cautions against mob mentality draws torches and pitchforks.:(
LinkYesterday I got five phone calls from myself. Really, that's what the Caller ID said, my name and number. Now seeing that I know it's not me, duh, they have to know that. Maybe they thought I'd be curious enough to pick up to find out who was using my name. They were wrong.
Maybe future you found a way to break the time barrier in a call to present you with information on what stocks to buy and what lottery numbers to play to make future you better off.
Not a chance, I wouldn't tell that asshole anything. Besides the future is only a couple years away so any killings I make will likely have 8 legs.
...I wouldn't tell that asshole anything.
:lol2:
Thought you were talking about me for minute.
I am *tired* of moving backwards in my projects.
Several steps in a row now as I've fixed the thing directly between me and completing a given task, I've found a bigger problem further underneath.
For the record, the deck has been electrified and the hot tub is hot and wet.
On my way there though, jfc. My life is plumbing now. Well, was plumbing for a long time, now demolition and hopefully some day, construction worker. Framer, carpenter, then plumber again. Then construction worker, tile setter and plumber again. Painter. Side gigs as general labor moving waste to the can, the can to the curb or the truck, the truck to the dump, rinse, repeat.
I would love to have a day off to just be a landscaper and gardener.
Fortunately, this is not my day job, only during the waking hours that I'm not at my day job.
V, you're working around your day job which is fixed time/days. Looking ahead to spending all the available hours doing the things that must be done. After that all the things you have to do in order to get the result you envisioned.
That's a drag.
I'd suggest for sanity and spirits, that you add to the inviolate schedule of employment a movie, a dinner out, something for your head and hers. Maybe every week or every other week, something scheduled in advance, something you both can plan on and look forward to.
One other thing... you're the man, it's your job to fix everything, yes sir it's your manly duty, right?
Wrong, tits are not a disqualifier for fixing shit or solving problems. Working together she might surprise you what she can do, and when you stop to catch your breath, copping a feel or a little smoochy is better than a cigarette.
Nothing like teamwork/accomplishment to bond people together.
A band of lovers.
So desperate for it to get better I'm resorting to wishing for that when it's 11:11. I'm not superstitious or religious
I know what you mean, if it gets better or worse you deal with it, but becalmed, not moving and can't do anything about it it maddening.
dumbfucks :finger:
This is what America (and the Cellar) has become. And apparently is now acceptable behavior. Once it never was.
What is the dic licking president doing?
This is what America (and the Cellar) has become. And apparently is now acceptable behavior. Once it never was.
yep, you nailed it
Pacific Gas and Electric with its two acts of domestic terrorism in as many weeks.
They are the conservative dream. Deregulate and let the free markets decide. What could go wrong?
I have been mildly sick for over three weeks now, mostly cycling between my throat and right ear. And because I'm me, I keep entertaining thoughts like, "What if this is just an age thing, like this is the new normal and my throat will just hurt forever until I die?"
That may be better than all the ailments you can dream up, or little animals living in you ear and throat. :eek:
Update: walk-in clinic doc gave me antibiotics and steroids. Already feeling tons better. Hooray for docs with loose scrip pads when you need them.
Glad you are on the mend.
I went on Facebook this morning. I'm starting to think it ain't a good place.
Going on facefuck you discover why your mother wanted you home by dark.
Welp ive done it again . I blew out my sholder ( right one this time ) , surgery is Tuesday , so you folks will prolly be seeing a bit more of me for the next few months ;)
There's some sunshine on a cloudy day.
Sorry Zippy.
I hope the surgery goes well and that you recover quickly.
Good luck with the surgery. Make sure you mark the wrong shoulder with a big No! Other one! In sharpie.
And make sure the use heavy duty American made parts. ;)
There's some sunshine on a cloudy day.
I bet it don't feel like sunshine right now.
Heal up quickly and completely, Zip.
Thanks all , i go under the knife tomorrow ,
WEEEEEEEEEEE !!!
Lay off the slider for a couple outings.
The 6 million dollar Zippy? RoboZip? FrankenZip?
i go under the knife tomorrow ,
Ask for a zipper rather than sutures. Next time, the doctor can simply open it up, push those parts back on place, and zip it up.
Or is that being too obvious.
Freanen Zip Ilike it
Damn this hurts
Ask for a zipper Har Har , oh to laugh
Sorry about the pain Zippy! :yeldead:
Owww that sounds painful Zip.
I've had calcific tendonitis in my shoulder and neck on and off for about 10 years, and when it flares up it's awwful - shoulder stuff is hella painful and debilitating. I really hope you recover quick and feel better soon.
Glad to see that you are back among us.
On the IR, though, done for the season. Rehab it and be ready for training camp 2020
I had three knee replacements in less than a year, I imagine it's the same pain. :thepain:
Christ man, how many knees do you have?
I have a participant whose had 3 hips done.
I had three knee replacements in less than a year, I imagine it's the same pain. :thepain:
Christ man, how many knees do you have?
Left knee, right knee,
wienee.:D
Okay, now you guys are funny. In the face of adversities.
Lumberjim: penes. Really loooong ones, peeeeeneeeeessss.
Like in Beeeeeethoven.
Every time I seem to be doing ok and the month ahead looks ok and I am more or less straight financially - I get fucked up by a vet bill. So then I have to borrow to get through the month so the next month I start on the back foot - sometimes for a couple of months - get straight, all paid up and looking like I won' have to borrow to get through the month .....bang - vet bill
So - I started out today with an ok bank balance - we got our xmas bonus, not much but not nothing (£180 after tax) - I have bought most of the pressies and not gone mad, got carrot a new dog bed, looking ok for the rest o fthe month, even though it's always a longer month (early Dec payday means a 5 week month)
Was meeting mum down at the vets with me going straight from work and her bringing Carrot from her house - it was a follow up appt only - just how's he doing on his new meds and here's another month supply: 5 mins, £30 - £40 max....
Mum arrived at the vets with carrot and told me that while she was in the bathroom, he'd gone int her bedroom and stolen her hearing aid off her side table - chewed the fuck out of it and some of the pieces she couldnt find including the tiny battery.
So instead of a simple followup visit it was a 40 minute, induce vomiting visit that cost £156
The hearing aid is NHS but even so is £80 replacement (not that mum can get it replaced this side of new year, so she is going to spend the entire season struggling to hear)
I've gone from 'I'm ok, comfortable and can even maybe afford to go for a nice meal with friends over xmas' to ' I have less than £70 a week after bills for the next 5 weeks and no leeway for anything'
I dont know how he does it. Every goddamn time.
Last month on payday I treated myself to a new vacuum cleaner (after a year of borrowing mums at weekends) as I made the payment I thought - I know what's going to happen.... ' and yes - 2 days later we had to go to the vets and I spent the rest of the month penny pinching to try to limp my way to payday
I got paid this month 4 days ago. I bought the presents, went to the hairdressers for the first time in almost a year and then I ordered his new dog bed (£40 - not the cheapest but by no ,means an expensive one) and treated myself to a takeout meal - and as I did it, I thought, I know what's going to happen next...
Every. Fucking. Time.
*takes deep breath*
OK - am feeling somewhat calmer and less upset. Thank you for listening.
Also Carrot is now a very sad doggy. Poor poor Carrot. He doesnt know he did it to himself.
We Cat proof everything so the only vet bills we get are dental. They are usually around $700.00, usually Bootsy sometimes Chloe, sometimes both.
A further update ...
When I ordered his dog bed it said expected delivery 27th Dec.
I then get an email telling me it will arrive today - and then this evening I got an email telling me it had been delivered to my address and 'handed to resident'
I am the only resident human at this address so unless Carrot somehow took delivery of his new bed and then ate it, we have a problem.
We used to get pet health insurance when we lived there. Do Carrot's pre-existing conditions prevent that? Is it something you could ask for as a birthday gift (assuming it's too late for Christmas) ...and if not, at least you'd have a fixed amount each month to deal with?
He is insured = but there is a life time limit per condition and the first 15 months after he was diagnosed with hip dysplasia I had to claim about a third of that limit.
So,anything to do with his hips I dont claim for in order to keep the remainder of that per condition cover available for if his hip fully fails and he has to have an op.
So that just then leaves the non-hip related stuff to claim for -which is a much smaller cost across the year. With the excess (£90) and the age related copay (I think 20 per cent but it might be up to 30 now he is 8) it basically means it is not worth claiming for anything under £300 - £400
If he had needed an xray and sedation after eating the hearing aid, I'd have claimed and got some of it covered but would have been out of pocket by about £180-£200
And if this was the start of something that required ongoing treatment over several weeks I would possibly claim if costs looked like they would go above £300 across the year for that particular injury or condition (the policy year that is,which runs march to march), but I'd still have to cover a significant chunk out of pocket.
I daren't end the policy - because then he would have no cover for anything to do with his hips. The premiums are quite high because of the early treatment and physio he had when he was young - so,I pay his insurance premiums each month and also pay his regular pain meds, blood tests and hip checks to avoid whittling down the rest of the cover for that stuff, and all the other stuff that occasionally affects dogs and leads them to the vets tends to stay just below a claimable cost in any one insurance year.
Basically, the insurance (£55 per month) is there in case he gets hit by a car, requires surgery or has to go through several xrays or tests to diagnose something major
Its fine - I am fine - just needed to vent until I put it back in perspective
bummer re the insurance. I figured being in the industry ish you would, but then they say doctors make the worst patients....
Tbf I don't have home contents insurance so, fair cop
I'd probably have let Carrot's insurance lapse duriing the time I was unemployed a few years back had he not already been diagnosed with something by then. knowing he could at any point in his life need new hips is a fairly strong incentive to keep the policy live.
£55($71) is a big nut every month. X 12 = $852 X 8 = $6,816 :eek:
Carrot is eight yrs old?! 8?!
Damn.
Upsetting? That doesn't even begin to cover the rage I have for fedex.
I always dread something coming by fedex because they always fuck it up.
They sent me an email last Thursday saying I have a package coming from Oak Park MI that will be delivered Sunday.
Friday I get another email saying the same thing. Saturday yet another email saying the same.
Sunday morning I click on the tracking and it says out for delivery. Fine, except it wasn't delivered.
Monday morning I click on the tracking and it says out for delivery. No, silly bunny, no package for you.
Of course the virtual assistant is no help so I call the fedex hotline and after convincing the AI answering the phone that I want a human, this guy says it will come Tuesday. Of course he's lying through his teeth and nothing on Tuesday. It's not coming Christmas either.
Today I get an email saying it was delivered at 2 PM on SUNDAY. No it fucking wasn't!!
Go to the tracking site, put in the number, it was delivered Sunday. No it fucking wasn't!!
Call the customer service hotline, give AI the tracking number, that was delivered on Sunday is there anything else? No it fucking wasn't!!
After going around and around with AI I finally get a human who says, Duh, Idunno. At last an honest answer, they'll probably fire him.
He said they'll investigate and call me. I ain't holding my breath.
Fedex is the worst, fedex is the pits, fedex is the dregs, lower than whale shit, incompetent liars.
I like how Amazon started taking pictures of items on doorsteps when they delivered. Once we were able to ascertain that the missing package had probably blown right off the porch and tracked it down in the yard
[SIZE="3"]Amazon refused to help catch porch-pirate delivery driver, sheriff says[/SIZE]
… The theft happened Dec. 19. According to the Sheriff’s Office, Amazon driver Jose Campos, 27 of Kissimmee, brought the package to the victim’s home in the Watersong Resort development, then placed the parcel on the ground near the door and took a photo to confirm delivery.
Then, he picked the package back up.
The theft was caught on the home’s security camera. Video released by the Sheriff’s Office shows the driver leaning the package against a Christmas tree in front of the door for the photo, then glancing around and — apparently not seeing the camera — removing it moments later. ...
They didn't simply hand over information to the authorities for a minor crime without a warrant?
~ Well done, Amazon ~
Stealing Christmas a minor crime?
We'll need a Grinch Statute to make it a felony.
Dana you clearly need to go to vet school.
I'm not so sure, if you became a Vet you'd end up with a whole house full of poor little babies need a home. Might end up costing you even more. :haha:
I'm just worried sick about Harry and Meghan. :sadpace:
How are they going yo make a living? Will they become desperate and appear in their own [strike]reality[/strike] royality TV show? Would it have a cheesy name like Royals - Canadian Style? :(
We're talking Di's baby and Di's grandbaby's mother.
The pundits say their "brand" is worth a Billion dollars.
Gosh, I sure hope they'll be OK. They seem like nice people. They'll be far away from family and their adoring British citizenry though.
Security gonna be a thing, an expensive thing.
I hope they both get eaten by a bear.
I might change my username to Sussexobon.
Why are youze guys picking on this couple?
Eddie the VIII quit the royal rat race too.
Yeah, but I didn't have to hear/read about it every time I turned around.
But that's not their fault, they're not to blame.
I'm blaming them anyway.
I hope they don't give the bear indigestion.
Oh OK, I was just wondering if you had a valid reason. Carry on.
Gosh, I sure hope they'll be OK. They seem like nice people. They'll be far away from family and their adoring British citizenry though.
Why are youze guys picking on this couple? ...
Youze guys, Kemosabe? I was being sarcastic about a royal family that has reportedly marginalized them and a public, especially the tabloids, that has ostracized them (supposedly because Markle is American and biracial).
https://sussexofficial.uk/Heir today, gone tomorrow.
Wednesday evening I texted my Uncle asking if the neighbors are afraid of the dark as the shooting, in the dark mind you, was pretty continuous. He texted back that it had started early that afternoon and he was assuming it would eventually get too expensive. He suggested that they might be celebrating Tet. We made a lot of jokes about napalm, air support, and Agent Orange but my PTSD uncle celebrated Tet at the invitation of the North Vietnamese the fact that he brought it up instead of covering it up makes me wonder how bad his night was.
There's so much 'Merica reflected in that post.
Yeah, we don't have the bandwidth to figure all that out.
They were watching the muzzle blasts in the dark.
Nothing like a five gallon bucket o' flame with a big bang. In the dark.
Youze guys, Kemosabe? I was being sarcastic about a royal family that has reportedly marginalized them and a public, especially the tabloids, that has ostracized them (supposedly because Markle is American and biracial).
Yes youze guys, aiding and abetting, fanning the flames, snickering and guffawing, is this shit really necessary...
Fake news.
Except for who broke up the Beatles.
How are they going yo make a living? Will they become desperate and appear in their own [strike]reality[/strike] royality TV show? Would it have a cheesy name like Royals - Canadian Style? :(
Well, that's out. They've been stripped of their "Royal" titles.
[SIZE="3"]Britain's Harry and Meghan will no longer be working members of royal family - palace[/SIZE]
… The couple will also no longer use their "Royal Highness" titles, the palace said in an announcement …
… Harry will remain a prince and the couple will keep their titles of Duke and Duchess of Sussex. …
… The Sussexes will not use their HRH title as they are no longer working members of the royal family. …
… It was not immediately clear whether the couple could continue to use the "Sussex Royal" title for their website and branding. …
https://sussexroyal.com/
ETA: Maybe they can change the website to sussexgrace.com and the brand along with it to Sussex Grace. It still sounds nice.
Keep calm and keep with tradition.
Got a letter from the County. We're doing a reassessment of properties and your assessment is tripled.
Go to the website specified, get 90% through scheduling a hearing, it freezes up.
Call the phone number on the website and get a recording saying they're experiencing unexpected call volume, call back later.
Triple my assessment and you don't expect me to call? You do not want me to come there, motherfucker.:mad2:
Scrape the paint off the house, set some goats loose, and put a couple Fords for your front yard. How the hell does it get tripled? That's nuts.
I bet it was an error that affected lots of people, and that's what caused the crashed site and unexpected call volume.
No, not an error. Court ordered county wide reassessment by this outfit, they send a assessment based on maps and real estate sales over the last couple years. But they don't know the intricacies of the area.
They know what's coming, they've designated four locations for these 20 minute interviews, seven days a week during March, April and May. So I get to argue with them, then they give the final number to the county.
At that point I can(will) appeal to the county assessment board who are familiar with local intricacies and go through it again. If I don't like their number I can sue or appeal again in a year.
What a pain in the ass.
Around here, they like to pee on us and tell us it's raining.
"We're lowing property tax rates! Aren't we wonderful!"
*government lowers the tax rate a hundredth of a percentage point*
*then government raises the assessed value of each home by 5%, causing the actual tax owed to go up by $500.*
Rinse and repeat, year after year.
Obviously, I'm making these numbers up for illustrative purposes, but they are very close to the truth.
On the other hand (maybe this isn't the case for you) the assessed value typically is less than what similar homes are actually selling for.
What prompted this the first time years ago was the people buying McMansions for a half a million bucks complained that ma and Pa Kettle who have lived in their house since WW II are paying less taxes when they both have the same number of bedrooms. Of course 5 of the Kettles 6 bedrooms are unused except when the children/grandchildren come home for Christmas, whereas the McMansionites have 4 spawn in school where most of the taxes go. They are also the ones telling the schools they need more of every thing that doesn't help educate the kids. The local school board paid some consultant $500,000 to investigate ways to make the high school look less like a school. :speechls:
I stay away from the whole thing to avoid arrest.
Also, traditionally houses were reassessed when they changed hands either by sale or inheritance.
I'm beyond miserable. The hits keep on coming. I don't know how to make it better. I don't want to be a zombie on drugs and as my health insurance is costing $1000+ a month that I don't have, that won't be an issue for long anyway. I just can't list all the things. It's too horrible. 2nd anniversary of Beest's death is friday too. I honestly can't imagine that's going to make it worse. Living without him is not living.
Oh monster! I am so sorry.
Monster, I'm really sorry life is so rough right now. I wish I could make it better. :hug:
I don't have any magical wisdom, but I'm glad you're talking about it.
I can't do anything, but I wish like hell I could. I'm sorry and I hope it gets better someday.
"...Russia’s Avangard missile has been operational since December last year. It is capable of flying 27 times faster than the speed of sound, and carries a nuclear weapon of up to 2 megatons (2000 kilotons, or over 13 times the destructive power of the Hiroshima bomb)."
If Covid19 don't get you, it will.
27 times the speed of sound is about 20,000 miles an hour: about 35 minutes from anyplace to yours.
I do not give a fuck.
update
today I give a fuck.
The other night when I had no fucks to give, I was moaning about my own predicament--NOT commenting on any previous poster's situation.
we now return you to your previously scheduled programming.
Gotta have a fuck to give one. congrats
Griff's right, every... most every... time I give a fuck I get fucked. :yesnod:
You know, I have my retro sewing machine broken...I was really upset.
I know there are sooooo much modern options. There are lots of computerized machines and so on, but I liked this old fashioned mechanism. I know nothing is eternal, but I'm still a bit upset. How can I make myself purchase one of those soulless machines?
All these computerized sewing machines deprive a person all the magical moments of crafting.
I know I need to choose something like
this, but I think they are all the same.
I'm not usually queasy, and I don't know what exactly it was, but I got lightheaded watching this, and had to turn it off.
Snake venom effects on blood:
[YOUTUBE]Z1Nyc8X8Ru8[/YOUTUBE]
I was going to post this yesterday but it slipped past me.
So ... some may have seen me post in the whats' bumming your stone thread a little while ago about Carrot's brother, Merlot being very ill, and the two Js being stranded here in the UK desperately trying to get back to him before he died.
Jude even got a flight to Hanoi, but when he reached Seoul for his connecting flight, discovered the entry requirements had changed so had to come straight back to the UK.
Merlot passed away yesterday - he'd rallied the way they often do near the end, and the kennel staff sent them videos of him happily bumbling about the place - he had the run of the kennels, due to the indefinite nature of their stay, Merlot and Biscuit have been treated like the kennel's dogs rather than guests.
He went peacefully - had palpitations and then slipped away on the lap of one of his favorite people at the kennels.
On the one hand, I am glad that dogs don;t think like we do - that Carrot is unaware and will remain so - on the other hand, there is this tiny illogical bit of me that feels almost guilty that I know this and he doesnt. He'll never see his brother again. He doesn't know this and doesn't miss him - they only saw each other a few times a year usually and he hasnt seen him for over a year since he moved to Hanoi - but I know it. And that makes me feel quite sad.
I also feel deeply sorry for the two Js, especially Jude - he moved heaven and earth to get to his poorly boy and got sooo close. I know he's hurting. They both are - but Janet's a lot better at coping with shit like this than he is.
Anyway - that's what is upsetting me at the moment.
RIP Merlot - you were the happiest most optimistic dog ever - right to the end. I will miss you being in the world. And if Carrot was capable of knowing - he wold miss you too.
You know, I have my retro sewing machine broken...I was really upset.
I know there are sooooo much modern options. There are lots of computerized machines and so on, but I liked this old fashioned mechanism. I know nothing is eternal, but I'm still a bit upset. How can I make myself purchase one of those soulless machines?
All these computerized sewing machines deprive a person all the magical moments of crafting.
I know I need to choose something like this, but I think they are all the same.
Oh that really sucks. I still remember when I went from an old mechanical typewriter to an electric one - ahhhh felt so weird - like there was suddenly a distance between me and what I was writing. Got used to it - but it took a while.
Damn.:sniff:
Yeah. So sad.
He was a Good Boy, he really was.
I parked my car yesterday and everything was fine.
Then, Popdigr drove my car to town, cuz his is in the shop.
Today I walk out to my car to put the top down so it'll be habitable when I'm ready to go somewhere, and there's a foot-long tear/break in my rear bumper cover, right on the corner. I noticed it right away cuz that bumper cover was cherry, damn near perfect.
And nobody knows nothing about nothing.
Now I need both bumper covers.
You can customize it with two black ones. There are people that repair those things, I had one repaired when none were available anywhere.
I just opened my mouth and started to turn my head to ask beest something .... like he was in the kitchen right behind me just tidying up and getting the dishwasher on before heading to bed which was how it was at this time of night. I suspect this will never stop, I need to find a way to deal with it better. 2.5 years. I've got my head around most of the stuff, but these unbidden moments....
A lot of years of habit to untrain, it will take time. Eventually on the rare occasions it does happen it'll make you smile.
I'm sorry for the unexpected reminder. For what it's worth, I think you're dealing with it in exactly the right way. It's a good thing when the grieving starts to ease a bit, and the happy memories get to take back over for just a second here and there.
the stuff I've gotten my head around is (some of) the practical stuff, and it isn't fun. And thinking "oh I'll ask..." .... fuck. But when I'm off guard it ... yeah
I had a brief dream respite for the last few months, but he's back.... Just mundane every day life anxiety dreams..... and for a while it was just me. and sometimes it still is. The only resolution is dawn either way.
I have never woken expecting to find him there, though. So there's that. That would be horrible(r), I think. But maybe that's because his side is full of clean laundry waiting to be put away and a multitude of pillows to try and help with my rapidly aging body randomly needing support in weird places in the night :D
My son, He is suffering from fever.
It's the, usually gray or black, plastic or vinyl piece that covers the actual, structural steel bumper.
Visible on both of ends of m'little Cherry Bomb
here.
Below the damn cat.
Okay so maybe I'm focusing on something really really small because of all the really really world changing crap that is going on today. That being said can someone please explain to me how coffee can be crunchy.
They probably added the word "crunch" after finding it was contaminated with coconut shell.
Perhaps; but, reasonable can be boring.
I'll be reasonable; however, just for you, just this one time.
The flavor is produced by more than one brand. Another one
explains it:
Hand crafted and carefully hand packed one bag at a time, this smooth, flavorful, and long lingering taste of crisp coconut, sweet caramel and crunchy tropical Hawaiian macadamias is a popular favorite. ...
Apparently, Coconut Caramel Mac didn't go over well.
I hope you're happy now.
...can someone please explain to me how coffee can be crunchy.
What kind of filters do you use?
Perhaps; but, reasonable can be boring.
I'll be reasonable; however, just for you, just this one time.
The flavor is produced by more than one brand. Another one explains it:
Apparently, Coconut Caramel Mac didn't go over well.
I hope you're happy now.
Well yes thanks for clearing that up. However using that logic McDonald's could sell a quarter pounder as a one-ton hamburger if it came from a 2000 lb cow.
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