The random sex post thread

Cloud • Apr 29, 2007 10:21 pm
Thank you, Bruce. I'm really touched by your effort.

So, here's a sex thread. Just for me. (keeping in mind, of course, there are minors here. :D

I've often contemplated standing on the sidewalk with a sandwich board reading, Free Blowjobs!

But somehow, that's still on my to-do list.
freshnesschronic • Apr 29, 2007 10:35 pm
Wouldn't that be illegal prostitution?

Do it and post the pics.
The pics of the SIGN and the SIDEWALK you pervs.
Seriously I'd double take about 3 times if I saw that.
Cloud • Apr 29, 2007 10:37 pm
not if it were free!
freshnesschronic • Apr 29, 2007 10:42 pm
Hmmmm....Touche.

So that be classified as just....slutty whoring hobag.
Don't do it then.
Cloud • Apr 29, 2007 10:44 pm
hehe. How about . . . generous oral provider?
freshnesschronic • Apr 29, 2007 10:46 pm
Yeah, but I'm sure most of us have a dentist that would love for us to come in for more frequently.
Undertoad • Apr 29, 2007 10:53 pm
Would there be a hole in the sign?
Cloud • Apr 29, 2007 10:54 pm
no, but it would have to be flexible, so I could kneel!
Sheldonrs • Apr 29, 2007 10:56 pm
Or you could carry a step ladder with you. Less stress on the knees.

Or just do what I did after I first came out. Go to a bath house and let them cum to you. ;-)
freshnesschronic • Apr 29, 2007 11:02 pm
Cloud;339184 wrote:
no, but it would have to be flexible, so I could kneel!


What would have to be flexible so you could kneel. The sign????? :yelsick:
Cloud • Apr 29, 2007 11:04 pm
right. I'm wearing the sign.

visualization not one of your skills, hmm?

too bad I had to retire my tongue piercing.
freshnesschronic • Apr 29, 2007 11:09 pm
Oh I thought you were holding it up a protestor or a hitchhiker.
Cloud • Apr 29, 2007 11:10 pm
no, just walking back and forth on the sidewalk hoping to lure unsuspecting . . . . um I mean, hoping to bestow free BJs!
freshnesschronic • Apr 29, 2007 11:11 pm
Holy crap we have a winner, right here in our own cellar.
freshnesschronic • Apr 30, 2007 12:26 am
Random: Do girls really not enjoy reverse cowgirl?
DucksNuts • Apr 30, 2007 12:32 am
YES!
piercehawkeye45 • Apr 30, 2007 12:34 am
Cloud;339196 wrote:
um I mean, hoping to bestow free BJs!

I need to meet people like you in real life...
freshnesschronic • Apr 30, 2007 1:14 am
DucksNuts;339217 wrote:
YES!


Why!?
Iggy • Apr 30, 2007 2:05 am
Maybe because it is difficult to keep your balance. Or maybe she missed the "not" part of that sentence. ;)
LabRat • Apr 30, 2007 11:00 am
freshnesschronic;339215 wrote:
Random: Do girls really not enjoy reverse cowgirl?


Definately not as pleasurable as regular cowgirl for me. Can occasionally even hurt.

YMMV depending on your partner.
Clodfobble • Apr 30, 2007 12:38 pm
Same here. I find it downright uncomfortable.
jinx • Apr 30, 2007 1:05 pm
Huh, I'm surprised. I like it a lot.
Cloud • Apr 30, 2007 1:12 pm
I think different partners fit different ways. Experimentation can be fun!
Trilby • Apr 30, 2007 1:13 pm
I'm so glad there's a random sex thread now!

One question for Cloud, though: Why GIVE it away? Are you that much into them? I am into the oral love but it has to be the right person.
































AAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Gotcha!
;)
DucksNuts • Apr 30, 2007 7:11 pm
Iggy;339249 wrote:
Maybe because it is difficult to keep your balance. Or maybe she missed the "not" part of that sentence. ;)


Awww shit, thats correct Iggy. I did miss the NOT part.

I like it a lot.
Cloud • Apr 30, 2007 8:08 pm
Why give it away? Because I like it! And because men are so appreciative.

Never really understood why a lot of women don't like to give head.
breakingnews • Apr 30, 2007 8:35 pm
Cloud;339458 wrote:
Never really understood why a lot of women don't like to give head.

amen!!! thank you, cloud, for carrying that flag - your effort will not be overlooked.
freshnesschronic • Apr 30, 2007 9:00 pm
Cloud go on Oprah and like, tell the nation of women out there that yes, blowjobs are healthy, stress relieving and fun! Get the word out there! Everyone will love you. ;)
Cloud • Apr 30, 2007 9:03 pm
like I said. The men are always so appreciative!

(slurp!)
Iggy • May 1, 2007 12:38 am
Cloud;339487 wrote:
like I said. The men are always so appreciative!

(slurp!)


Ditto. :blush:
Cloud • May 1, 2007 1:17 am
I'm so sad my Tom of Finland toile sheets that I ordered from this one place never materialized (!pun alert!)
TheMercenary • May 1, 2007 10:42 am
freshnesschronic;339483 wrote:
Cloud go on Oprah and like, tell the nation of women out there that yes, blowjobs are healthy, stress relieving and fun! Get the word out there! Everyone will love you. ;)

:D :p :yelgreedy
Cloud • May 1, 2007 10:56 am
(singing)

First of May, First of May -- outdoor fucking starts today!
freshnesschronic • May 1, 2007 3:03 pm
Hey baby, I wish I were your derivative so I could lie tangent to your curves.
piercehawkeye45 • May 1, 2007 3:24 pm
freshnesschronic;339661 wrote:
Hey baby, I wish I were your derivative so I could lie tangent to your curves.

NERD!!!!!!!!!!
freshnesschronic • May 1, 2007 3:40 pm
:sweat:
I'm studying for my calculus final sorry!
Cloud • May 1, 2007 4:08 pm
did I mention I don't even want anything in return for the bjs?

. . . okay, maybe a kiss. Afterwards, with tongue.:angel:
piercehawkeye45 • May 1, 2007 8:40 pm
freshnesschronic;339676 wrote:
:sweat:
I'm studying for my calculus final sorry!

Me too actually.

I'm sorry, I can be a third derivative sometimes.
BigV • May 1, 2007 8:45 pm
freshnesschronic;339661 wrote:
Hey baby, I wish I were your derivative so I could lie tangent to your curves.


You need to study more.

What you really want is to be perpendicular to her surface normal. Tangents touch in only one place, you tease.
freshnesschronic • May 1, 2007 8:49 pm
BigV;339758 wrote:
You need to study more.

What you really want is to be perpendicular to her surface normal. Tangents touch in only one place, you tease.


Way to kill a great one liner :yeldead:

:nadkick:
BigV • May 1, 2007 8:56 pm
You want a great one liner?

You need to study more.

You lol'in yet?
xoxoxoBruce • May 2, 2007 6:51 am
BigV;339758 wrote:
You need to study more.

What you really want is to be perpendicular to her surface normal. Tangents touch in only one place, you tease.
Yo V, he's 19... he only wants to touch in one place. It's us old farts that settle for spooning.
Aliantha • May 2, 2007 6:58 am
ok, why are there only (besides ducks and Bruce) only older chicks and young fellas posting in this thread? lol
DucksNuts • May 2, 2007 7:12 am
Coz the young bucks are learning stuff off the older chicks???

And they are talking smart stuff, not smuttie. When the smut comes out, I will join in properly.
Aliantha • May 2, 2007 7:13 am
Ath I Exthpected!
LabRat • May 2, 2007 9:29 am
Aliantha;339911 wrote:
ok, why are there only older chicks and young fellas posting in this thread?



31? [SIZE="3"]Old?[/SIZE] pffft. :headshake
SteveDallas • May 2, 2007 9:34 am
I have a bottle of Geritol with your name on it, LabRat! :D
LabRat • May 2, 2007 9:46 am
You gonna start up with me whippersnapper? I'll whip your skinny little arse into submission with my tennis balled walker and hogtie you with my lifeline cord!!!
Iggy • May 2, 2007 2:44 pm
Aliantha;339911 wrote:
ok, why are there only (besides ducks and Bruce) only older chicks and young fellas posting in this thread? lol


I didn't know 22 was old.
Sheldonrs • May 2, 2007 3:22 pm
Iggy;340027 wrote:
I didn't know 22 was old.


We're even. I didn't know 46 was young. ;)
bluecuracao • May 2, 2007 4:09 pm
It is, haven't you heard? 46 is the new 26! :D
Hime • May 2, 2007 4:49 pm
I think it's kind of like how when an actress is 40 she gets cast as the mother in movies, whereas when a male actor is 40 he gets cast as the romantic lead opposite Jessica Alba.
Cloud • May 2, 2007 5:33 pm
because us oldies are goodies
Elspode • May 2, 2007 7:25 pm
I like the title of this thread. I'm always looking for some random sex. Actually, I'd settle for some planned sex, or even accidental sex.
xoxoxoBruce • May 2, 2007 7:53 pm
SteveDallas;339934 wrote:
I have a bottle of Geritol with your name on it, LabRat! :D
I'll bet there's a roofie in it, don't trust that lecher, LabRat.
lumberjim • May 2, 2007 9:31 pm
I like a good BJ in the morning.
lumberjim • May 2, 2007 10:48 pm
LabRat;339294 wrote:
Definately not as pleasurable as regular cowgirl for me. Can occasionally even hurt.

YMMV depending on your partner.


Clodfobble;339331 wrote:
Same here. I find it downright uncomfortable.


jinx;339348 wrote:
Huh, I'm surprised. I like it a lot.


yeah...I reckon it has a lot to do with the bronco yer bustin, m'am
Iggy • May 2, 2007 11:30 pm
I was trying to think of something good and sexy to talk about... and I'm coming up with nothing. I think I have discussed most of the topics available. Tell you what... if someone comes up with something fun to discuss and joins in with me, I will be happy to contribute much more. :D
lumberjim • May 3, 2007 12:03 am
talk about the time you had porno sex.
Iggy • May 3, 2007 12:10 am
What do you mean porno sex? That it was video taped? That others saw it? That I was paid to do it? That it was just crazy and wild? Because I could take that many different ways, and some of them would mean that I have never had porno sex.
zippyt • May 3, 2007 12:38 am
I beleve carzy and wild would cover it , now if there is video evedence that would be worth watching !!!
lumberjim • May 3, 2007 1:06 am
Iggy;340142 wrote:
What do you mean porno sex? That it was video taped? That others saw it? That I was paid to do it? That it was just crazy and wild? Because I could take that many different ways, and some of them would mean that I have never had porno sex.


i was referring mainly to subject matter.....plot......series of events....cast....etc...
Iggy • May 3, 2007 1:07 am
I think I am going to drag KinkyVixen in here to chat with me... ;)

A play by play huh?
bbro • May 3, 2007 4:31 pm
You want random? How's this - I like having a sex buddy. The best part is that we were friends before so if we go without for a bit, no one is upset or offended and there is not having to call every day or any of that crap. The only bad thing is that he works nights on the weekends and I work days during the week, so most likely, I am the one losing sleep......Poor me!!

:doit:
Trilby • May 3, 2007 5:04 pm
porno sex...hmmmm....

I have porno carpet in my basement (think mid-seventies with a vengence) Does that count?

Best sex ever for me--two - no- three guys. I used to love one, but I got over it and the sex with him is now better and hotter than EVER!

As a woman "ripens" (see: gets old), she fondly recalls her most daring and accomplished cowboys...they leave a lasting impression...I urge all you whippersnappers to endeavor to BE that accomplished cowboy! She'll always remember you and touch herself---probably.

PS--you don't have to be huge but you DO have to be weird. And that's a good reason to Love the Nerds.
BrianR • May 3, 2007 8:19 pm
Am I the only other person here who knew who Tom of Finland was without Googling?
Cloud • May 3, 2007 8:55 pm
Besides me? I bet Sheldon knows. Course, I know of lot of . . . strange things. :)

and I deliberately did not make a link 'cause, ya know--we have minors here.

Let them look up their own porn!
Cloud • May 5, 2007 11:46 am
Kama Sutra Oil of Love

I love this stuff. It's been around for a long time--long enough that I originally had it as a teenager (NO idea where I got it at that time), and I always associate it in my mind with Frank Herbert's "Dune" to me. So, though the Amazon description says it's chocolate, vanilla, and cinnamon (and who wouldn't like THAT?); to me, it smells like melange ("spice").

And BTW, here's some honey dust for ya:

Honey Dust

and . . . didja know you could buy lube from Amazon?
Trilby • May 5, 2007 2:33 pm
Cloud wrote:
and . . . didja know you could buy lube from Amazon?


Cloud you are a font of knowledge :D
Cloud • May 5, 2007 2:50 pm
Brianna;340828 wrote:
Cloud you are a font of knowledge :D


I get that a lot! :D
xoxoxoBruce • May 5, 2007 6:44 pm
I get, I'm a veritable cesspool of information that's as clear as mud but it covers the ground
Cloud • May 5, 2007 8:26 pm
oooh. sticky!
rkzenrage • May 6, 2007 3:34 am
Brianna;340329 wrote:

PS--you don't have to be huge but you DO have to be weird. And that's a good reason to Love the Nerds.


So, that's why!:eek: