Sexual History vs Virginity

Madman • Oct 12, 2006 10:21 pm
Of all the topics to do a first thread (mine) and a poll to boot. What do I pick? Sex! Go figure. Okay, here it is:

With all this talk about the sexual history of your partner. It really appears that no one (not many) really had a tizzy over the sexual exploits of their partner.

One thing that I haven't read about is the possibly of "doing it over" again. Of course we can't back up the hands of time. But, with the old saying "hindsight is 20/20" - would we if we could?
morethanpretty • Oct 12, 2006 10:27 pm
I wouldn't...but then again I have only ever had one partner...and I'm still with him :P
Clodfobble • Oct 12, 2006 10:44 pm
Hell no. It takes a long time, especially for women, to figure out just what works for them. Those early years are essential practice, and as far as I'm concerned newlyweds don't need the added stress of having no clue what you're doing in the bedroom...
ashke • Oct 12, 2006 11:59 pm
How do virgins go about it in the bedroom anyway?? Lots of fumbling?
morethanpretty • Oct 13, 2006 12:15 am
ashke wrote:
How do virgins go about it in the bedroom anyway?? Lots of fumbling?


You were never a virgin? Wow you started early. :eyebrow:
mrnoodle • Oct 13, 2006 12:32 am
How do they go about it? It's just sex, the damn dog is smart enough to figure it out :lol:
ashke • Oct 13, 2006 1:37 am
morethanpretty wrote:
You were never a virgin? Wow you started early. :eyebrow:


No, no, I was never in such a situation although I could be (in the future).

So how? :confused:
rkzenrage • Oct 13, 2006 2:00 am
We've been together far too long to worry about that kinda' shit.
Sundae • Oct 13, 2006 6:20 am
Can't answer as 1) am not currently with a partner
2) there is no option to remove some of my partners from my history.

Nothing to do with numbers, just some people I shouldn't have slept with and would be happy to erase from my memory. But realistically I suppose everything you do contributes to who you are today (especially when you learned from the mistakes) so I'd best keep the whole package.

I would never want to go back to being a virgin at my age. A future partner would feel an enormous amount of responsibility if he knew I'd resisted for 34 years in order to give him the gift of my maidenhead.

And I wouldn't want to sleep with a virgin at this age either. I remember what that was like from my teens, and that was when I had little experience myself. To me a loving, emotional encounter is far more likely from a lover with previous experience. With the best will in the world, a bull-at-a-gate jackhammer approach tends to characterise a man's first efforts.
Griff • Oct 13, 2006 6:56 am
Wouldn't change. How we got here is who we are. Besides only Kirk should be allowed to fool with time/space.
Pie • Oct 13, 2006 8:39 am
ashke wrote:
No, no, I was never in such a situation although I could be (in the future).

So how? :confused:

Two words: start slow.
morethanpretty • Oct 13, 2006 9:24 am
ashke wrote:
No, no, I was never in such a situation although I could be (in the future).

So how? :confused:


sorry i jumped to conclusions. :redface: If you know where everything is you should be fine. Just be safe, and careful with who you choose, don't make a hasty decision. [SIZE="1"]look at me; giving advice i didn't take[/SIZE]
ashke • Oct 13, 2006 10:15 am
I'll keep that in mind ^^
Ibby • Oct 13, 2006 10:28 am
Since I dont have hindsight of it yet, then I'm hoping my foresight's 20/20 too...
Clodfobble • Oct 13, 2006 11:22 am
ashke wrote:
No, no, I was never in such a situation although I could be (in the future).

So how?


My number one rule would be to not be afraid to speak up about anything that is uncomfortable, etc. You can of course always move up to telling him what you actually want ;)... but start with the baby steps. I know so many women who found sex to be genuinely unpleasant for a long time because they thought it was just "supposed" to be that way.
Elspode • Oct 13, 2006 1:48 pm
I don't know about anyone else, but I had been dry humping, mutually diddling, performing and receiving acts of oral gratification - and just about every other possible variation that did not involve genital/genital contact - for *years* before I finally got to play hide the salami.

By the time I did the actual horizontal bop, it was, if you'll pardon the phrase, anticlimactic. At any rate, I was scarcely "inexperienced", so perhaps we need a more concise definition of the word "virgin"?
mrnoodle • Oct 13, 2006 3:24 pm
Yeah, my first time actually "doing it" was lame. Plus, we had been dry humping for like 2 hours, so the relevant bits were essentially anesthetized.
Elspode • Oct 13, 2006 6:06 pm
mrnoodle wrote:
Yeah, my first time actually "doing it" was lame. Plus, we had been dry humping for like 2 hours, so the relevant bits were essentially anesthetized.

"Relevant bits essentially anesthetized". LJ, I think we have a winning User Title, here. :D
Madman • Oct 13, 2006 10:18 pm
I was one of those "nice guys" that took the meaning of the word "no" to really mean "no." My HS girlfriend and I would indulge in heavy petting for an hour or so. Never took the "plunge." Dammit! I was 22 the first time and it wasn't my HS girlfriend. We broke up after she graduated.
piercehawkeye45 • Oct 14, 2006 2:55 am
Yep, nice guys get the shaft. Then girls get all bitchy when the asshole treats her like shit and they do it again without learning anything.
Ibby • Oct 14, 2006 7:41 am
I listen to what she tells me, not neccessarily what she says. Just cause she SAYS no doesn't mean she means no. Though that can getchya into trouble...
smoothmoniker • Oct 14, 2006 12:12 pm
ashke wrote:
No, no, I was never in such a situation although I could be (in the future).

So how? :confused:


Step one: forget everything you ever saw somebody do in a porno. No "Rocky the Stud" moves the first time out.
MaggieL • Oct 14, 2006 8:32 pm
ashke wrote:
No, no, I was never in such a situation although I could be (in the future).

You never were a virgin, but could be in the future? Cool...

I was a virgin twice...you're not missing anything.
MaggieL • Oct 14, 2006 8:35 pm
mrnoodle wrote:
Yeah, my first time actually "doing it" was lame. Plus, we had been dry humping for like 2 hours, so the relevant bits were essentially anesthetized.

Reminds me of this Kevin Smith monolog
Elspode • Oct 15, 2006 12:42 am
MaggieL wrote:

I was a virgin twice...you're not missing anything.

You *so* need that on a t-shirt, Maggie. :blush:
Ibby • Oct 15, 2006 1:17 am
Hm, I just thought of a similar but not quite the same experience I could relate this too... I had my first kiss with someone I'm not going out with anymore, and I really regret it at this point. If I could I would start over on that bit, at least.

EDIT: MTP, you make me sick. You twisted, crazy, derranged loony.
morethanpretty • Oct 15, 2006 1:18 am
We all just need a Real Doll!

[size=1]sometimes I scare myself[/size]
morethanpretty • Oct 15, 2006 1:25 am
Ibram wrote:

EDIT: MTP, you make me sick. You twisted, crazy, derranged loony.


I have succeeded!
yesman065 • Oct 16, 2006 9:09 am
MTP "We all just need a Real Doll!" I think we found the perfect spouse for BM!! !! !!
bmwmcaw • Oct 16, 2006 12:04 pm
You get what you give in this world.

Ask yourself what you want and do that on others. Very simple. Being a virgin isn't as important as being honest with yourself and others.
bluecuracao • Oct 16, 2006 12:24 pm
bmwmcaw wrote:
You get what you give in this world.

Ask yourself what you want and do that on others. Very simple.


So, you want to be called, "Sally?" :confused:
Aliantha • Oct 16, 2006 6:25 pm
lol...priceless
KinkyVixen • Oct 17, 2006 8:29 pm
I wouldn't change a thing...i like knowing what I know...and I've enjoyed the experiences i've had.