Rapture dispelled ... what's next?

Flint · 05-22-2011, 09:28 AM

I say we go after the "shoes that you magically get in shape by wearing them"

Trilby · 05-22-2011, 09:30 AM

I like the "lotion that magically firms your thighs and rids your body of cellulite!"

Sundae · 05-22-2011, 11:22 AM

What about those tiny little bottles of stuff that kill all the bad things in your guts, make the good things grow, reset your cholesterol to zero... but every brand has it's own unique formula...

"Listen to your gut" says one of the current advertising campaigns.
I did.
Turns out the bastard was in competiton with my brain to become the largest organ, and now it is, has no intention of surrendering its power.

jimhelm · 05-22-2011, 12:23 PM

women's orgasms?

BigV · 05-22-2011, 04:15 PM

dude, that *IS* rapture.

wolf · 05-22-2011, 04:27 PM

Acai Berries.

There was no such thing 10 years ago, now they're in everything.

I suspect it's a genetically engineered fruit-like paste that enhances compliance with the desires of liberal government officials. Including the kinky ones.

BigV · 05-22-2011, 04:43 PM

wrt Acai

woo hoo.

I succumbed to some of the marketing hype, and bought a bottle of Acai liquor. Sweeeet. Too sweet for my palate. I'll wind up mixing it for some fruity daiquiris I guess.

TheMercenary · 05-22-2011, 10:21 PM

Well damm, all that prep for the Zombie Wars, another religious disappointment.

Pooka · 05-23-2011, 12:18 PM

I have to admit I've been disappointed by the lack of Zombie action for years.

monster · 05-23-2011, 01:22 PM

I didn't know you and flint swang with the zombies. Maybe you need to borrow minifob's Zomblebee to see if you can attract some? or are you saying flint is a zombie

footfootfoot · 05-23-2011, 04:31 PM

OK let me just say that just because the folks who thought they were on baby J's A list are still here doesn't mean there wasn't a rapture. It's just that this entire planet is gomorrah.

No go run along and have sin fun. I mean some fun.

Sheldonrs · 05-23-2011, 04:44 PM

Can't wait for the next one!

richlevy · 05-23-2011, 05:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by footfootfoot

OK let me just say that just because the folks who thought they were on baby J's A list are still here doesn't mean there wasn't a rapture. It's just that this entire planet is gomorrah.

No go run along and have sin fun. I mean some fun.

Actually, since we are talking about an article of faith that by definition is not limited by any rules, there can be any number of alternate explanations.

One of which is that 1/4 of the planet was raptured. It's just that G-d, in his mercy, has expunged their memory from friends and family to spare them the pain.

Fortunately, I have found a list. Being that it is over 1 billion people, it is quite extensive.

www.whowasraptured.com

plthijinx · 05-23-2011, 08:31 PM

now THIS is funny! anyone ever read the left behind series?

Uday · 05-23-2011, 08:47 PM

I am so disappointed.

I thought everyone was saying "the raptor" was coming, and I really wanted to see that.

05-22-2011, 09:28 AM	#1
Flint Snowflake Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Dystopia Posts: 13,136	Rapture dispelled ... what's next? I say we go after the "shoes that you magically get in shape by wearing them" __________________ **************** There's a level of facility that everyone needs to accomplish, and from there it's a matter of deciding for yourself how important ultra-facility is to your expression. ... I found, like Joseph Campbell said, if you just follow whatever gives you a little joy or excitement or awe, then you're on the right track. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Terry Bozzio**

05-22-2011, 09:30 AM	#2
Trilby Slattern of the Swail Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 15,654	I like the "lotion that magically firms your thighs and rids your body of cellulite!" __________________ In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum

05-22-2011, 11:22 AM	#3
Sundae polaroid of perfection Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: West Yorkshire Posts: 24,185	What about those tiny little bottles of stuff that kill all the bad things in your guts, make the good things grow, reset your cholesterol to zero... but every brand has it's own unique formula... "Listen to your gut" says one of the current advertising campaigns. I did. Turns out the bastard was in competiton with my brain to become the largest organ, and now it is, has no intention of surrendering its power. __________________ Life's hard you know, so strike a pose on a Cadillac

05-22-2011, 12:23 PM	#4
jimhelm a beautiful fool Join Date: Sep 2010 Location: 39.939705 Posts: 4,504	women's orgasms? __________________ There's a Shadow just behind me. Shrouding every step I take. Making every promise empty, pointing every finger at me. _tool

05-22-2011, 04:15 PM	#5
BigV Goon Squad Leader Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Seattle Posts: 27,063	dude, that IS rapture. __________________ Be Just and Fear Not.

05-22-2011, 04:27 PM	#6
wolf lobber of scimitars Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Phila Burbs Posts: 20,774	Acai Berries. There was no such thing 10 years ago, now they're in everything. I suspect it's a genetically engineered fruit-like paste that enhances compliance with the desires of liberal government officials. Including the kinky ones. __________________ wolf eht htiw og "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis

05-22-2011, 04:43 PM	#7
BigV Goon Squad Leader Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Seattle Posts: 27,063	wrt Acai woo hoo. I succumbed to some of the marketing hype, and bought a bottle of Acai liquor. Sweeeet. Too sweet for my palate. I'll wind up mixing it for some fruity daiquiris I guess. __________________ Be Just and Fear Not.

05-22-2011, 10:21 PM	#8
TheMercenary “Hypocrisy: prejudice with a halo” Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Savannah, Georgia Posts: 21,393	Well damm, all that prep for the Zombie Wars, another religious disappointment. __________________ Anyone but the this most fuked up President in History in 2012!

05-23-2011, 12:18 PM	#9
Pooka Your Invisible Rabbit Friend Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: Betwixt and Between Posts: 528	I have to admit I've been disappointed by the lack of Zombie action for years.

05-23-2011, 01:22 PM	#10
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	I didn't know you and flint swang with the zombies. Maybe you need to borrow minifob's Zomblebee to see if you can attract some? or are you saying flint is a zombie __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

05-23-2011, 04:31 PM	#11
footfootfoot To shreds, you say? Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet! Posts: 18,449	OK let me just say that just because the folks who thought they were on baby J's A list are still here doesn't mean there wasn't a rapture. It's just that this entire planet is gomorrah. No go run along and have sin fun. I mean some fun. __________________ The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs

05-23-2011, 04:44 PM	#12
Sheldonrs Master Dwellar Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Los Angeles, CA Posts: 4,412	Can't wait for the next one! Attached Images __________________ Laugh and the world laughs with you; cry and the world laughs AT you.

05-23-2011, 08:31 PM	#14
plthijinx Master Dwellar Join Date: Aug 2003 Posts: 4,197	now THIS is funny! anyone ever read the left behind series? Attached Images __________________ For your dreams to come true, you must first have a dream.

05-23-2011, 08:47 PM	#15
Uday Poker Playing Fool Join Date: Feb 2011 Posts: 128	I am so disappointed. I thought everyone was saying "the raptor" was coming, and I really wanted to see that.

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