Cellar Swifties

Shawnee123 · 12-08-2008, 07:28 AM

I got this thread idea over the weekend as I was working on a puzzle book:

A Tom Swifty is a phrase in which a quoted sentence is linked by a pun to the manner in which it is attributed.

For example:

"Pass me the shellfish," said Tom crabbily.

"I might as well be dead," Tom croaked.

So, I thought we could do Cellar Swifties. The quote and subsequent adverbial pun can be related to the Dwellar's occupation, demeanor, a certain quote that stood out to you, their way of life...nothing is sacred.

I'll start us off:

"Once again, I've sold a buttload of cars this week," said lumberjim automatically.

"I hope this thread doesn't die a slow and painful death," thought Shawnee morbidly.

Shawnee123 · 12-08-2008, 12:44 PM

"I see no one is up to the challenge," she said gamely.

"WTF are y'all waitin' on the freaking crickets?" she chirped.

lookout123 · 12-08-2008, 12:50 PM

"Sorry, it took some time to understand. I'm not the sharpest knife in the drawer," he simply stated.

Undertoad · 12-08-2008, 12:51 PM

"This thread should be moderated," said xoxoxoBruce with authority.

lookout123 · 12-08-2008, 12:53 PM

"fuck you!", Lookout perversely replied.

Shawnee123 · 12-08-2008, 12:56 PM

"Now you've got the hang of it," Shawnee replied airily.

lookout123 · 12-08-2008, 01:02 PM

"Sometimes it takes awhile," he quickly retorted.

Shawnee123 · 12-08-2008, 01:05 PM

"Your jokes are making stuff come out my nose," she exclaimed snottily.

ZenGum · 12-08-2008, 07:09 PM

"Look! A Greek parachutist!" said Tom, condescendingly.

"I've sold my last pig." said Farmer Tom, disgruntled.

"That machine is dangerous" said Tom, offhandedly.

"I am NOT a homosexual necrophiliac!" Said Tom, in dead earnest.

DanaC · 12-08-2008, 07:19 PM

Quote:

"That machine is dangerous" said Tom, offhandedly.

That took a second read through :P

richlevy · 12-08-2008, 08:51 PM

"This thread is full of hot air!" Richlevy bellowed.

SteveDallas · 12-08-2008, 08:57 PM

"My posting brought on a lot of flames," said Steve crisply.

Elspode · 12-08-2008, 08:59 PM

"I wish I was smarter", Elspode said thoughtlessly.

"There's no lube on the nightstand", Jim said grittily.

"I think the Cellar Advent Calendar needs a picture of Frankenclaus", Monster said monstrously.

"There's no such thing as too many tits on The Cellar", MTP said barely audibly.

HungLikeJesus · 12-08-2008, 09:26 PM

"I'm out of wine," HungLikeJesus said dryly, as he walked across his swimming pool. He opened his tool box. "And I'm out of nails," he said crossly, as he picked up his hammer and saw. "I can't hang around here all day. And my scalp itches," he said, bringing up another thorny issue.

Juniper · 12-08-2008, 09:45 PM

"This thread makes me feel all warm and fuzzy," Junie purred.

12-08-2008, 07:28 AM	#1
Shawnee123 Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 21,206	Cellar Swifties I got this thread idea over the weekend as I was working on a puzzle book: A Tom Swifty is a phrase in which a quoted sentence is linked by a pun to the manner in which it is attributed. For example: "Pass me the shellfish," said Tom crabbily. "I might as well be dead," Tom croaked. So, I thought we could do Cellar Swifties. The quote and subsequent adverbial pun can be related to the Dwellar's occupation, demeanor, a certain quote that stood out to you, their way of life...nothing is sacred. I'll start us off: "Once again, I've sold a buttload of cars this week," said lumberjim automatically. "I hope this thread doesn't die a slow and painful death," thought Shawnee morbidly. __________________ A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby

12-08-2008, 12:44 PM	#2
Shawnee123 Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 21,206	"I see no one is up to the challenge," she said gamely. "WTF are y'all waitin' on the freaking crickets?" she chirped. __________________ A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby

12-08-2008, 12:50 PM	#3
lookout123 changed his status to single Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Right behind you. No, the other side. Posts: 10,308	"Sorry, it took some time to understand. I'm not the sharpest knife in the drawer," he simply stated. __________________ Getting knocked down is no sin, it's not getting back up that's the sin

12-08-2008, 12:53 PM	#5
lookout123 changed his status to single Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Right behind you. No, the other side. Posts: 10,308	"fuck you!", Lookout perversely replied. __________________ Getting knocked down is no sin, it's not getting back up that's the sin

12-08-2008, 12:56 PM	#6
Shawnee123 Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 21,206	"Now you've got the hang of it," Shawnee replied airily. __________________ A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby

12-08-2008, 12:51 PM	#4
Undertoad Radical Centrist Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Cottage of Prussia Posts: 31,423	"This thread should be moderated," said xoxoxoBruce with authority.

12-08-2008, 01:02 PM	#7
lookout123 changed his status to single Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Right behind you. No, the other side. Posts: 10,308	"Sometimes it takes awhile," he quickly retorted. __________________ Getting knocked down is no sin, it's not getting back up that's the sin

12-08-2008, 01:05 PM	#8
Shawnee123 Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 21,206	"Your jokes are making stuff come out my nose," she exclaimed snottily. __________________ A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby

12-08-2008, 07:09 PM	#9
ZenGum Doctor Wtf Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Badelaide, Baustralia Posts: 12,861	"Look! A Greek parachutist!" said Tom, condescendingly. "I've sold my last pig." said Farmer Tom, disgruntled. "That machine is dangerous" said Tom, offhandedly. "I am NOT a homosexual necrophiliac!" Said Tom, in dead earnest. __________________ Shut up and hug. MoreThanPretty, Nov 5, 2008. Just because I'm nominally polite, does not make me a pussy. Sundae Girl.

12-08-2008, 08:51 PM	#11
richlevy King Of Wishful Thinking Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Philadelphia Suburbs Posts: 6,669	"This thread is full of hot air!" Richlevy bellowed. __________________ Exercise your rights and remember your obligations - VOTE! I have always believed that hope is that stubborn thing inside us that insists, despite all the evidence to the contrary, that something better awaits us so long as we have the courage to keep reaching, to keep working, to keep fighting. -- Barack Hussein Obama

12-08-2008, 08:57 PM	#12
SteveDallas Your Bartender Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Philly Burbs, PA Posts: 7,651	"My posting brought on a lot of flames," said Steve crisply.

12-08-2008, 08:59 PM	#13
Elspode When Do I Get Virtual Unreality? Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Raytown, Missouri Posts: 12,719	"I wish I was smarter", Elspode said thoughtlessly. "There's no lube on the nightstand", Jim said grittily. "I think the Cellar Advent Calendar needs a picture of Frankenclaus", Monster said monstrously. "There's no such thing as too many tits on The Cellar", MTP said barely audibly. __________________ "To those of you who are wearing ties, I think my dad would appreciate it if you took them off." - Robert Moog

12-08-2008, 09:26 PM	#14
HungLikeJesus Only looks like a disaster tourist Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: above 7,000 feet Posts: 7,208	"I'm out of wine," HungLikeJesus said dryly, as he walked across his swimming pool. He opened his tool box. "And I'm out of nails," he said crossly, as he picked up his hammer and saw. "I can't hang around here all day. And my scalp itches," he said, bringing up another thorny issue. __________________ Keep Your Bodies Off My Lawn SteveDallas's Random Thread Picker.

12-08-2008, 09:45 PM	#15
Juniper I know, right? Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 1,539	"This thread makes me feel all warm and fuzzy," Junie purred.

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