July 8, 2010: Fingernailed - Page 5

Spexxvet · 07-09-2010, 10:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by classicman

She doesn't have to fight, Pete. She's on so many medications right now its ridiculous.
She is a media created cash cow. What she needs is to get away from her false friends, dysfunctional family and management team who are more concerned with living off of her than in her own well being. Odds of that actually happening? ZERO.
Then again she is getting advice from her "friends who have already gone to jail, Kim Kardashian and Lane Garrison who killed a passenger in his car while driving drunk.

How do you know all this?

Shawnee123 · 07-09-2010, 10:28 AM

Ha! The media?

jinx · 07-09-2010, 11:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by monster

Methinks all y'all former addicts are just jealous you didn't have celebrity to add to your arsenal of excuses for your addiction before you got cured. But you'd have used it the same way she tried to if you'd have had it.

I think the former addicts just know what needs to be done - they are walking the walk. Compassion doesn't help, even if you keep it up for years, it just makes it easier on the addict to stay addicted.

Shawnee123 · 07-09-2010, 11:26 AM

But there is a difference between compassion and enabling, as there is a difference between enabling and stoning ('scuse the pun.)

People with support systems (compassion without enabling) are typically more successful. Being ashamed of oneself is a huge symptom (could be chicken AND egg) of addiction, and a real roadblock in not only seeking help, but in stepping forward and making one's way out of the shit.

I agree that "awww, poor poor thing" helps no one. I also think public condemnation helps no one. When one has one's foot in the door, whether by force or by free will, they can best be served by compassion without pity, encouragement without excuses.

Nirvana · 07-09-2010, 11:37 AM

I think the system may be enabling her if she is allowed to take one of her prescription drugs. A couple I can see like Zoloft and Adderall but WTF does she need dilaudid ?

classicman · 07-09-2010, 11:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jinx

I think the former addicts just know what needs to be done - they are walking the walk. Compassion doesn't help, even if you keep it up for years, it just makes it easier on the addict to stay addicted.

Hello!

jinx · 07-09-2010, 11:50 AM

When all of your compassion is used up, your addict will still be an addict. And while they will have forgiven themselves for all the lying/sneaking/stealing/addict behavior that led you there, they will be angry with you for your lack of compassion.

classicman · 07-09-2010, 11:52 AM

... and blame you for all the wrongs they've done.

Shawnee123 · 07-09-2010, 11:57 AM

Classic, how can you keep proclaiming what a former addict you are? Just a couple weeks ago you posted about the beers you were drinking. I've heard it time and time again from you, how you've conquered some demons (which as far as I can tell was normal young people partying) then raising a beer in a thread or saying "I don't know, I was drinking beers (or wine) that night."

But yeah, big man is walking the walk, talking the talk, lying the lie. As per usual. Hey, it could all be true, but will you make up your mind what YOUR personal truth is? You don't seem to have much of a handle on it.

And the addict in my life thanked me, still does, for being there for him when he was ready to get out of rock bottom.

I see whining about being prey to an addict as pitiful as pity for the addict themself.

Trilby · 07-09-2010, 01:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jinx

...while they will have forgiven themselves for all the lying/sneaking/stealing/addict behavior that led you there, they will be angry with you for your lack of compassion.

Most addicts (including myself) have never forgiven themselves and are their own worst enemy/critic/hater which makes it hard to recover AND the addicted brain LOVES to use this as an excuse.

LiLo is afraid - and who wouldn't be? - and it doesn't seem like she has any internal coping mechanisms or reserve (ha! hence the addiction!) so it makes perfect sense for her to throw a tantrum. I can only hope she turns it around the way Robert Downey Jr. did - coz that man was effed up before he cleaned it up.

classicman · 07-09-2010, 01:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Brianna

I can only hope she turns it around the way Robert Downey Jr. did - coz that man was effed up before he cleaned it up.

Great example, I forgot about him. IIRC wasn't he a selection in the death pool a few years ago?

squirell nutkin · 07-09-2010, 02:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by monster

H (uh-oh is marriage an addiction too?)

Love is a state of mind.
Marriage is an institution.
Getting married to someone you love is being in a Mental Institution.

Sundae · 07-09-2010, 02:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by classicman

Then again she is getting advice from her "friends who have already gone to jail, Kim Kardashian and Lane Garrison who killed a passenger in his car while driving drunk.

Just correcting a fact - Khloe Kardashian was convicted of a DUI, not Kim.

Personally I don't have any sympathy for LiLo. Why should I? She'd have none for me.
I do not condemn her for being an addict. I don't even judge her for it.
I just think once she's in the system she should follow the rules.

The not-drinking rule - bloody hard. You can't push an addict into a recovery that way.
But she's had TWO DUIs. That's pretty poor. I'm sure the bracelet was not fitted after the first one.
She can drink her head off as far as I'm concerned - I don't know her so I don't care about her. But if you've been convicted once for heaven's sake don't do it again. And this is where the money comes into it - she can afford a taxi. She must have loads of friends with cars. She can stay home and order in - keep it off the streets.

AND she has been missing the classes prescribed.
One because she went to Cannes.
That is when I think "Just suck it up". Do your classes. It's not overly punitive. They are for an offence THREE YEARS AGO. How many classes could there have been? My government-funded course was only 11 weeks and I jumped through hoops to get on it. Sadly it wasn't for me, but I turned up all the same just because I'd got a place. If I thought I might go to prison otherwise I'd have camped on their doorstep.

Sorry, I now sound like I have an issue with her. I don't really. But when I sit down to think about it I tend to strip the addict part out and just see a young lady who thought she could buck the system. She's learned she can't, in a rather unpleasant way. But better this than her getting tanked up behind the wheel and next time ending someone's life.

Shawnee123 · 07-09-2010, 02:26 PM

Drunk drivers are lucky if they don't kill themselves, or their friends, or complete strangers. No argument there.

I am surprised at other addicts who can't have any compassion (yes, even for the sneakiness, the duplicity, the "fuck you" attitude that pervades an addicts mind.) Then again, sometimes people are truly addicts and sometimes it's a way to get attention.

Maybe, and I don't know, once one has come through on the other side there is no memory of what it felt like. Hopefully that is true healing, I would hate to think of it as dry-drunkenness or ostrich-head sand-stuffing.

I don't think Ms Lohan would act so repulsively to get attention: that is a true addict acting out right there. Addicts don't care how ugly you think they look, or how horrible you think they are. They need help, not "poo-poo's" from those who've never dealt with it, or those who think they have but have no idea of the depths addiction can take one to. Or, just can't seem beyond themself to realize that one size doesn't fit all in the timeline, treatment, and realization of addiction. 'Cause that would be the epitome of egocentrism.

I, for one, applaud Bri for her honesty in all her dealings with her demons. I would think that being an innerly honest person would help one truly recover. You DA girl, girl!

classicman · 07-09-2010, 02:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sundae Girl

Just correcting a fact - Khloe Kardashian was convicted of a DUI, not Kim.

Just for accuracy, I never said Kim got a DUI.

Quote:

I just think once she's in the system she should follow the rules.
She can drink her head off as far as I'm concerned - I don't know her so I don't care about her. But she can afford a taxi. She must have loads of friends with cars. She can stay home and order in - keep it off the streets.

AND she has been missing the classes prescribed.
One because she went to Cannes.
That is when I think "Just suck it up". Do your classes. It's not overly punitive. They are for an offence THREE YEARS AGO. How many classes could there have been?
If I thought I might go to prison otherwise I'd have camped on their doorstep.
I tend to strip the addict part out and just see a (SPOILED) young lady who thought she could buck the system. She's learned she can't, in a rather unpleasant way. But better this than her getting tanked up behind the wheel and next time ending someone's life.

BOLD MINE
yup yup yup

07-09-2010, 10:28 AM	#62
Shawnee123 Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 21,206	Ha! The media? __________________ A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby

07-09-2010, 11:26 AM	#64
Shawnee123 Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 21,206	But there is a difference between compassion and enabling, as there is a difference between enabling and stoning ('scuse the pun.) People with support systems (compassion without enabling) are typically more successful. Being ashamed of oneself is a huge symptom (could be chicken AND egg) of addiction, and a real roadblock in not only seeking help, but in stepping forward and making one's way out of the shit. I agree that "awww, poor poor thing" helps no one. I also think public condemnation helps no one. When one has one's foot in the door, whether by force or by free will, they can best be served by compassion without pity, encouragement without excuses. __________________ A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby

07-09-2010, 11:37 AM	#65
Nirvana Back in 10 Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 3,684	I think the system may be enabling her if she is allowed to take one of her prescription drugs. A couple I can see like Zoloft and Adderall but WTF does she need dilaudid ? __________________ Speaking simply... do not confuse this with having a simple mind.

07-09-2010, 11:50 AM	#67
jinx Come on, cat. Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: general vicinity of Philadelphia area Posts: 7,013	When all of your compassion is used up, your addict will still be an addict. And while they will have forgiven themselves for all the lying/sneaking/stealing/addict behavior that led you there, they will be angry with you for your lack of compassion. __________________ Crying won't help you, praying won't do you no good.

07-09-2010, 11:52 AM	#68
classicman barely disguised asshole, keeper of all that is holy. Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 23,401	... and blame you for all the wrongs they've done. __________________ "like strapping a pillow on a bull in a china shop" Bullitt

07-09-2010, 11:57 AM	#69
Shawnee123 Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 21,206	Classic, how can you keep proclaiming what a former addict you are? Just a couple weeks ago you posted about the beers you were drinking. I've heard it time and time again from you, how you've conquered some demons (which as far as I can tell was normal young people partying) then raising a beer in a thread or saying "I don't know, I was drinking beers (or wine) that night." But yeah, big man is walking the walk, talking the talk, lying the lie. As per usual. Hey, it could all be true, but will you make up your mind what YOUR personal truth is? You don't seem to have much of a handle on it. And the addict in my life thanked me, still does, for being there for him when he was ready to get out of rock bottom. I see whining about being prey to an addict as pitiful as pity for the addict themself. __________________ A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby

07-09-2010, 02:26 PM	#74
Shawnee123 Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 21,206	Drunk drivers are lucky if they don't kill themselves, or their friends, or complete strangers. No argument there. I am surprised at other addicts who can't have any compassion (yes, even for the sneakiness, the duplicity, the "fuck you" attitude that pervades an addicts mind.) Then again, sometimes people are truly addicts and sometimes it's a way to get attention. Maybe, and I don't know, once one has come through on the other side there is no memory of what it felt like. Hopefully that is true healing, I would hate to think of it as dry-drunkenness or ostrich-head sand-stuffing. I don't think Ms Lohan would act so repulsively to get attention: that is a true addict acting out right there. Addicts don't care how ugly you think they look, or how horrible you think they are. They need help, not "poo-poo's" from those who've never dealt with it, or those who think they have but have no idea of the depths addiction can take one to. Or, just can't seem beyond themself to realize that one size doesn't fit all in the timeline, treatment, and realization of addiction. 'Cause that would be the epitome of egocentrism. I, for one, applaud Bri for her honesty in all her dealings with her demons. I would think that being an innerly honest person would help one truly recover. You DA girl, girl! __________________ A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby Last edited by Shawnee123; 07-09-2010 at 02:38 PM.

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